#ii. leagueofdccm ; homelander & starlight : 𝟎𝟎𝟐.

[nghtmarish]

     𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭  𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞  𝐡𝐨𝐰  𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐨𝐮𝐬  𝐚𝐧𝐝  𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐭  𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝  𝐡𝐢𝐦,     apart  from  the  odd  conversation,  they  hadn't  really  spoken  to  one  another  about  anything  and  he  always  seemed  so  above  everything  that  she  didn't  even  think  he  was  all  that  approachable.     which  he  wasn't  really.     but  this  was  really  unexpected  and  no  wonder  it  made  her  a  little  flustered,  like  she  was  unsure  of  how  exactly  to  react,     "     sorry     .     .     .     homelander,     "     she  said  with  a  small  smile,  she  knew  he  was  here  today  as  he  was  doing  the  vip  event  with  ezekiel  and  he  had  a  speech  to  make  as  well,  but  she  didn't  think  she  would  see  him.     a  part  of  her  was  still  a  little     𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐝     that  he  would  speak  at  an  event  like  this,  he  didn't  really  seem  like  the  religious  type  at  all.     but  then  again,  maybe  it  was  all  a  part  of  the  image  that  vought  were  trying  to  present  to  the  world.     this  whole  thing  had  been  incredibly  eye  opening  and  she  didn't  really  know  what  to  think  about  it  all  anymore.

     𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭  𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤  𝐚𝐭  𝐡𝐢𝐦  𝐚𝐬  𝐡𝐞  𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝  𝐚𝐥𝐥  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐬  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐡𝐚𝐝  𝐭𝐨  𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐧,     teeth  pulling  on  her  bottom  lip  as  her  hands  pulled  at  her  skirt  for  a  moment.     she  had  been  so  grateful  that  they  had  allowed  her  to  wear  her  old  uniform  for  the  believe  expo,  she  actually  felt  like  herself  again  and  she  didn't  feel  so  exposed.     but  she  had  tried  to  refuse  the  new  uniform,  she  had  been  left  with  no  choice  and  she  was  a  quick  learner,  as  much  as  she  thought  she  had  some  power,  she  really  had  none.     starlight  highly  doubted  it  was  the  same  for  him.     then  when  he  talked  about  the  something  else,  she  couldn't  look  at  him  because  it  felt  like  he     𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐰     about  what  happened  with  the  deep,  or  at  least  was  aware  that  something  happened.     her  heart  was  racing,  nails  digging  into  the  palms  of  her  hands  for  a  moment  and  she  shrugged  her  shoulders,     "     nothing,  that's  it,  i  guess,     "     starlight  really  didn't  want  to  talk  about  what  happened  her  first  day,  it  made  her  skin  crawl  enough  and  it  would  be  worse  to  think  people  were  somewhat  aware  of  what  had  happened.     not  that  it  would  surprise  her  if  the  deep  had  that  kind  of  reputation.

     𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝  𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐦𝐨𝐦  𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞,     her  mom  was  the  last  person  she  really  wanted  to  be  dealing  with  right  now,  at  least  for  a  little  while  anyway.     this  whole  day  just  felt  really  reminiscient  of  her  pagaent  days,  feeling     𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐜𝐞𝐝     to  do  things  that  she  didn't  want  to  do  and  doing  it  with  a  smile  on  her  face  the  entire  time.     if  she  had  thought  being  on  the  seven  would  mean  her  whole  life  would've  felt  like  one  of  those  ridiculous  hero  pagaents,  she  never  would've  signed  up.     she  wanted  to  save  people  and  instead  she  felt  like  she  was  just  constantly  on  some  stage,  forced  to  smile,  sing  and  say  exactly  what  is  expected  of  her.     it's  infuriating.     yet  when  he  smiled  at  her  like  that,  she  felt  herself  actually     𝐬𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞     back,  not  a  forced  one,  a  real  genuine  smile  that  reached  her  eyes.     a  part  of  her  already  knew  that  it  would  look  good  for  them  to  be  seen  together,  but  she  also  wouldn't  deny  that  she  was  curious  about  his  speech,  especially  if  he  was  not  going  to  say  what  stillwell  had  given  him.     who  knew  that  homelander  would  be  such  a  rebel?

     "     𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐡,  𝐢'𝐥𝐥  𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐤  𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡  𝐲𝐨𝐮,     "     starlight  smiled,  hoping  she  really  wasn't  as  blushing  as  much  as  she  felt  like  she  was,  especially  since  he  kept  calling  her  kitten  like  that.     god,  she  was  like  a  school  girl  with  a  crush,  it  was  ridiculous,  she  had  to  pull  herself  together.     just  because  she  had  to  lie  about  being  a  virgin  didn't  mean  she  had  to  act  like  it.     linking  her  arm  with  his,  she  looked  up  at  him,     "     do  you  do  that  a  lot?     not  say  whatever  stillwell  gave  you?     "     starlight  asked,  unsure  if  that  was  even  something  that  she  could  do,  since  the  last  time  she  had     𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐝     to  stand  up  for  herself  when  it  came  to  her  uniform,  she  basically  told  her  that  if  she  didn't  wear  it  then  she  wouldn't  be  in  the  seven.     she  didn't  even  want  to  think  what  they  might  do  if  she  started  telling  the  truth,  he  probably  could  get  away  with  it  being  the  leader  and  all  that,  but  she  was  probably  replaceable,     "     the  way  they  make  it  sound  to  me  is  that  we  pretty  much  got  no  choice  in  a  lot  of  things     .     .     .     just  glad  that  i  got  my  old  uniform  back  today,  i  don't  feel  so  naked  and  exposed,     "     

" Just Homelander..., " THE LEADER OF THE SEVEN REMINDS HER with a playful wink throwing it in her direction. " Sir is too formal; we're family here, Starlight. Teammates. " Ah, yes. THE IMAGE. VOUGHT IS ALWAYS about these illusions of theirs. Madelyn loved to remind him of said image. Sunshine & fucking rainbows and laughing babies. Fuck the sunshine and fuck those babies; he'd laser each and every one of them if he fucking could, shove that perfect image of himself right up Madelyn Stillwell's and Stan Edgar's ass. Never did it once used to bother Homelander.... PLAYING THE PERFECT hero who was filled with joy and love, maybe because part of him wished he'd had that. Joy and love, he means. But he means real joy, the kind of happiness he sees on these mud people's faces when they are surrounded by their loved ones. Family. It just seems.... real. The smiles on their faces come out naturally, while his smile is forced. And love, he sort of felt that ? In a way, he guesses with Madelyn ? But it never does seem like the type of love you'd see in the movies and say out loud ' I want that. ' -- NO.

Mister American understood where she was coming from; he recalls being a BRIGHT EYE YOUNGEST LIKE HER ONCE-- beaming with joy when he had first joined THE SEVEN-- GOD, what a time. Now it's getting old, and it's getting boring, and while he's attempting to do some actual saving, some actual changes... Vought wants him to sit back and be their little show pony. When he looks at Starlight, he just sees another show pony for them to show off, their SHINY NEW TOY. Their little holy virgin, young and blonde with perky tits. " Complaining ? " Homelander shrugs it off, waving It like he would have none of that. " Is it complaining when you're just being honest ? I mean... you've been here how long, and already they've changed your outfit, they had you lie to your fellow audience. Fake your saves, and what else ? " Tapping at his chin in thought, just listing away every single demand that VOUGHT had, how it's always Vought this, Vought that. But not once did they listen to what Starlight wanted.

HE KNEW.... KNEW THERE WAS SOMETHING MORE BENEATH all this disappointment as if he didn't know there was something going on, remembers it when it came to her very first meeting, she thought he didn't notice, but he SAW EVERYTHING... saw the threatening look in her face when sending deadly daggers towards The Deep's direction. The glow in her eyes was fierce; it even had The Deep cowering in his seat like the little fish bitch he was. Oh, sweet, pure, Starlight will surely bring some excitement to his life, and he sees that now. The older super sighed, peeking out the tent's flaps; he saw an older woman scanning the scene and could hear her through the crowd as she called out Starlight's name. Deep blue hues flickering back to the blonde woman before him, offering her one of his signature grins, tilting his head to the side, his hands behind his back as he nudges his head for the two to make a leave. " Would you like to walk with me ? I'm about ready to go do my speech; you'll love it, by the way. I'm-- " Should he ?

" ...I think I will go with a different approach than what Stillwell wanted. What's wrong with us being a little more... truthful, hm ? I mean... what would GOD think of us.... sinners. I'd love to have my fellow teammates' support while up there. What do you say, Starlight ? " He offers his arm out for the young superhero to take; he's being such a GENTLEMAN ! His charms and all displayed just for her, pearly whites showcasing. " C'mon, Kitten. Don't be shy; I won't bite you. " he's doing his own thing without Stillwell taking him by the hand, without Stan Edgar's approval. He's sure the sight of him and Starlight walking arm in arm together would make all the fans curious about the two blondes resembling Barbie and Ken. This was his life, and he was The Homelander, the only man in the sky, and he could do whatever the FUCK he wanted. If Madelyn Stillwell didn't give two shits about what he had to say, then it's time he starts finding his own path; of course, he'll keep the act going. The time will be right when the time is right. And along with this new path comes a new trophy.

[nghtmarish]

     𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞  𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐨  𝐰𝐚𝐬  𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐝  𝐭𝐨  𝐛𝐞  𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐲,     something  she  had  done  for  years  as  a  teenager,  something  she  was  used  to  and  maybe  she  would  feel  like  herself  again.     well  that  was  bullshit.     it  had  used  to  feel  like  home,  but  now,  she  felt  like  she  was  still  constantly  lying.     lying  to  herself,  lying  to  everyone  she  spoke  to  and  no  one  seemed  to  actually  be  hearing  her  when  she  spoke.     annie  had  thought  this  was  going  to  be  easy,  going  to  be  just  like  how  it  was  when  she  was  younger,  it  would  be  like  going     𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞     and  it  would  keep  her  feet  on  the  ground.     but  instead  she  still  felt  like  she  was  free  falling,  drowning  in  all  the  lies  and  the  fake  stories.     she  had  thought  she  was  getting  everything  she  had  wanted,  but  her  dream  had  become  an  almost  living  nightmare  over  night  and  she  still  couldn't  speak  up  about  it  at  all.     she  just  had  to  smile,  wave  and  say  whatever  they  wanted  her  to  say.     it  was  infuriating  and  she  felt  like  she  was  breaking  apart  at  any  point.

     𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐧  𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞  𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝'𝐯𝐞  𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐬𝐭  𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭  𝐭𝐨𝐝𝐚𝐲,     all  she  had  to  do  was  answer  their  questions  and  she  didn't  have  to  think  about  anything  else.     she  had  been  one  of  them,  she  had  been  curious  about  all  sorts  of  things  and  she  had  wished  someone  could've  been     𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐭     with  her  then.     but  it  was  clear  from  the  way  everyone  was  looking  at  her,  that  honesty  wasn't  going  to  work  here  and  as  much  as  she  hated  lying  to  the  teens,  she  didn't  feel  like  she  had  a  choice.     lying  about  her  virginity  and  sex  made  her  feel  dirtier  than  anything  else,  she  had  almost  forgotten  how  badly  they  looked  at  sex  and  it  wasn't  this  terrible  thing.     it  wasn't  just  that,  it  felt  all  felt  so     𝐰𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠     and  she  was  trying  to  remember  if  it  had  always  been  like  this.     or  if  she  had  changed  so  much  from  being  the  good  little  christian  girl  that  she  was  when  she  was  a  teenager.

     𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐡𝐚𝐝  𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐞𝐝  𝐚  𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭  𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭  𝐭𝐨  𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞,     almost  as  if  she  was  trying  to  remind  herself  why  she  was  doing  all  of  this  in  the  first  place  and  she  just  had  to  keep  breathing  through  it  all,  just  keep  smiling  and  it  would  be  all  over.     starlight  jumps  at  the  sound  of  homelander's  voice,  spinning  to  face  him,  eyes  wide  as  she  realises  that  she's  been  caught  out  by  the  one  person  who  was  still  somewhat  of  a  mystery  to  her.     she  shifts  under  his  gaze,  a  blush  coming  up  on  her  cheeks  as  she  looks  down,  shaking  her  head,     "     i     .     .     .     "     she  doesn't  even  try  to  say  she  wasn't  lying,  he  obviously  had  known  she  was  lying  in  the  first  place  and  adding  lies  on  top  of  it  wouldn't  make  her  feel  any  better  about  any  of  this.     was  she  in     𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐛𝐥𝐞     for  lying?     or  was  she  doing  the  right  thing  by  playing  into  the  image  that  vought  were  trying  to  push  for  her?     annie  didn't  exactly  feel  like  america's  sweetheart  right  now.

     𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤  𝐚𝐭  𝐡𝐢𝐦,     extremely  aware  that  she  was  probably  still  blushing  and  she  shrugs  her  shoulders,  unsure  of  just  how  honest  she  can  be  with  him.     he  was  the  homelander,  leader  of  the  seven,  she  was  just  the  new  girl  who  was  trying  to  find  out  her  place  in  all  of  this,     "     i'm�� not  a  huge  fan  of  it,  no,     "     annie  admits,  but  she's  definitely  playing  it  safe  with  what  she  says  with  him  whilst  she  was  being  truthful.     hand  comes  up  to  rub  the  back  of  her  neck,  shifting  a  little  on  the  spot  as  she  tries  to  ignore  the  way  he  was  looking  at  her,  like  he  knew  some  big  secret  of  hers  but  she  didn't  know  what  it  was  exactly,     "     but  i  guess  that's  just  all  a  part  of  this.     they  pick  an  image  and  we  play  a  part,     "     she  couldn't  even  hide  the  disappointment  in  her  voice.     shaking  her  head  again,  forcing  a  smile  on  her  lips  as  she  looks  away  from  him  for  a  moment,     "     sorry,  sir,  i  shouldn't  be  complaining,     "

@nghtmarish ( starlight ) // LIKED FOR A STARTER : HOMELANDER

STILLWELL HAS FAILED HIM YET AGAIN, YET A-FUCKING-GAIN. Of course, wearing that baby of hers like an accessory was far more important. She loves playing single mommy, and it's getting quite old. Why should he give a fucking damn what she wanted from him ? When she obviously didn't care to hear what he had to say. SHE GAVE HIM A SHIT SPEECH, one that made him want to laser her in half, along with everyone else who thought he was nothing but a show pony with a pretty face. He's much more than that; he'll show her and everyone else.

That ringing sound devours the noises around him. He walks among the crowd with a forced smile; he doesn't know what he says to the few people following him around like lost puppies wanting attention from their owner. But whatever he says brings a FOOLISH SMILE to his fans' faces. As he makes his way through The Believe Expo, he hears a familiar voice shatter through the ringing in his ears. Stops walking, turning towards the tent to the right...

...and it feels like a movie, where the wind lightly blows the flap of the tent, and there he sees Starlight, sitting among those who ARE OH-SO desperately in need of answers to the SO-CALLED RIGHT PATH. Homelander can see and hear how the man beside her is giving her a warning look, he doesn't want her to be honest, wants her to lie to these young folks. Keep the purity alive, he assumes. And she lies through her teeth, but he can tell she's uncomfortable with it.

HOMELANDER WAITED OUTSIDE THE TENT UNTIL STARLIGHT was done with her little-- whatever it was. Once she seemed to be the last one left inside their tent, perhaps collecting her thoughts on what she had signed up for, he approached the young blonde with his hands behind his back. Homelander tuts at Starlight, shaking his head silently for a moment. " Naughty, naughty Starlight. Does God know you just lied to your audience ? " She's far from a virgin, sweet, pure Starlight. A shame, though... but that's another thought for another time. " You reek of sins. " But her scent is consuming, inviting, another thought for another time. " LET ME GUESS... Vought wants you to paint pretty pictures of innocence and have you play little Miss Virgin, who waits for marriage. Our very own America's sweetheart. How cute. But... I can sense that you don't like it very much. do you ? "