#xabi alonso fanfic

[nemolfc]

𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐬 𝐦𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐭𝐨𝐨 - 𝐱𝐚𝐛𝐢 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐨

𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲: 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐲𝐦𝐨𝐮𝐬

(𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭)

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐬, (𝐨𝐫 … 𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐨 𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐢'𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐱𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐨)

𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐬𝐦*𝐭.

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲!!! (𝐢 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐦𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐡𝐨 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐫𝐢𝐝'𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 … 𝐛𝐮𝐮𝐮𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐜.)

Her life was quite unique from the very beginning, growing up in Reggiolo as the youngest daughter of Carlo Ancelotti propelled her into greatness from a very young age ...

Her oldest sibling Katia was a communications manager for a popular company in Milan, her second oldest Davide worked closely with her father after he transitioned into management, she on the other hand had opted to venture into music, training quite vigorously ever since she was young, the training had paid off as following her graduation from university in which she had recieved a degree in business-management as well as a minor in communications.

She decided to dedicate her time and focus onto music, and what started as quite a bumpy path given the nepotism accusations coupled with the negativity she consistently recieved online ultimately lead to a thriving career as a fully established pop vocalist at just twenty years old with two successful albums behind her.

However, asides from music, she adored football as it had been the common ground which strengthened her relationship with her father, she'd consistently attend every game he managed in every club he ever went to, however when it came to her personal preference, it was that of the Merseyside club, Liverpool.

At first, she could not exactly pinpoint why she was so drawn to the club -it was only two months into following the club that she realized why she was drawn to them- it was the very moment, her youthful eyes landed on him and then, everything changed ...

Initially she'd chalked it up to a sense of admiration, she loved his style of play, had worn his jersey to every home and away game, cheering him on as much as she could, she'd even gotten his autograph on the jersey, a fond memory she kept to herself, hidden from everyone around her, however as time went on and she continued to follow his career, she knew that what she felt spanned further than admiration, and it wasn't until she learned of her father's transfer from Paris Saint Germain to Real Madrid, just how intense her feelings were to noneother than Xabier Alonso.

♫⋆｡♪ ₊˚♬ ﾟ.♫⋆｡♪ ₊˚♬ ﾟ.♫⋆｡♪ ₊˚♬ ﾟ.♫⋆｡♪ ₊˚♬ ﾟ.♫⋆｡♪ ₊˚♬ ﾟ.♫⋆｡♪ ₊˚♬ ﾟ.

It'd been a year since her father became the manager of Real Madrid, six months since Xabi had made the shift from the Merseyside champions to Los Blancos, and Y/N was definitely thrilled to be able to watch him play whenever she could, along with supporting her father, after having relocated from London to Madrid to broaden her musical horizon.

Carlo, was beyond thrilled -he'd always had a soft spot for Y/N- yes, he loved all of his children equally, however his youngest was the closest due to how eager she was to understand the world of football and in turn, he supported her creative and artistic musical venture, making sure to boast about her every chance he can get -and that's what ultimately lead to his newest player becoming fascinated with his youngest- furthermore, leading to their very first encounter.

Real Madrid had won the Copa Del Rey following an impressive 7-0 bout with Sevilla, and to celebrate -Sergio had suggested a private night at the club full of drinks and a vibrant atmosphere- that night had coincided with Y/N's twenty first birthday, and whilst the team were at the private booth with their significant others downing drinks and chatting amongst one another, he on the other hand seemed far more invested in a particular and alluring sight right across from the booth.

Another booth was occupied by a group of young girls, and amongst one of them was her, he'd recognized her almost immediately -however what drew his attention further, was the ruby red spaghetti strapped dress she had that left nothing to the imagination, coupled with her beautiful hair curled to perfection as well as her makeup and the stunning heels had served to attract him almost instantly, foregoing the obvious fact that he was a decade older than her, and she just so happened to be the daughter of his coach.

Sergio, who was initially chatting with Ricardo had noticed his fellow Spaniard's gaze, he followed his gaze to the booth across from theirs, his brows shooting up in amusement, "Xabi, hermano ..." he chuckled, "Y/N?"

"Huh?" replied Xabi, realizing he'd been caught, he brushed it off and chuckled, "I was just shocked to see her, that's all ..."

"It's her birthday," Sergio replied, "Overheard the gaffer talking to her before the match the day before!"

"Ah! ..." Xabi nods, "It makes sense."

Sergio looked at him for a moment before he asked, "You like her, don't you?"

"No." Xabi replied quickly.

Sergio laughs, "You fucking liar, you are crushing on her ..."

"I'm not," he replies with a defensive tone, before releasing a groan of frustration. "Ok, maybe I do ... but it's not like I'm going to chase her, I won't risk my spot on the team."

"I hear you ..." Sergio chuckles before adding, "Though I won't blame you if you do end up with her, you guys are kind of similar, passionate about your careers, the whole nine yards."

Xabi seemed too focused on Y/N to even pay attention to what Sergio was saying, and it was when Y/N had excused herself to go to the restrooms that he said, "I'm gonna go!"

Sergio frowns, "Where?"

"I'll be right back ..." Xabi states as he stands up, and walks towards the restrooms, right around the time she steps out and bumps into him.

"Oh my gosh, I am so sorry ..." she said softly before her eyes locked on his, they widened in recognition, "Xabi?"

"Yeah, and you're Y/N?" he replied with a gentle tone.

"The one and only ..." she chuckles before adding with a nervous tone, "I should add though that I'm a big fan of yours ..."

"You are?" he asks, surprised by her statement.

"Uh huh ... I mean, you can imagine how excited I was when I learned that you'd be managed by my dad," she giggles.

"That's flattering, to have the talented Y/N as my fan ..." he admits with a soft smile.

"Um ... I gotta go, but I'll see you around!" she said softly, before adding. "Congratulations on your win, that goal was pretty amazing!"

He smiles, "Thank you."

"Bye," she waved.

"Bye," he waved.

───────────────────────────────

Another year rolls around, and Xabi had settled into his new team quite seamlessly -beloved by the fans, his teammates and Carlo- however the latter was a double edged sword, because as much as he admired the Italian manager, he felt a sense of dread each time he recieved a text message or a call from her ...

Whilst Carlo regarded him as a consistent starter for each match, the fact of the matter is he knew that his chances were on thin ice given his secretive friendship with his manager's twenty one year old daughter, a friendship that he now identifies as a full fledged relationship, at least on his end ...

Xabi had grown so fond of her, her bubbly persona, professionalism when it came to her career and the love she gives beyond her music, volunteering to help charities, donating to hospitals, he knew he was hooked the minute he had heard her sing yet now, he was completely and utterly hers, and he wasn't ashamed to admit it, a few of his teammates had picked up on the stolen looks he'd give Y/N whenever she was in attendance, Sergio had warned him to be extra careful and he was, to an extent.

One afternoon, on a rare free day, he asks her to meet him at the park -an odd request given that they usually spend time either at his house or hers, depending on the day- however, he had other plans as he brought along a small basket full of treats and a picnic blanket, setting things up under one of the trees, he waited for about forty five minutes until he spotted her walking towards him; it was then, he realized that no matter how many times he saw her, he fell in love, again and again as her charm and kindness radiated through her eyes.

"Xabi!" she exclaims with a soft look, "What's all of this?" she gestured to the picnic basket.

His cheeks flush, and he answers with a shy tone. "This is um ... our first date!"

"Our what?" she retorts in surprise.

"Our first date ... I know, the classical thing is I have to ask you out first but you're Carlo Ancelotti's daughter ..." he states, gulping nervously. "His youngest daughter, and that alone freaked me out so I thought being friends with you would help suppress my feelings for you but they never went away, and I know I'm potentially gonna lose my spot for this, but to hell with it! I can't hold back, I want to explore this, this thing between us, because I know I'll regret it, if I don't."

To say that Y/N was stunned would be an understatement, to her belief, she always thought her crush was unrequited and in a way she was content with it, to love him from afar and be his friend -however, to hear him declare his feelings had definitely managed to sway her into replying- "You do know if my dad finds out, you'll probably be benched for the whole season!"

He chuckles, "I'm willing to take my chances."

Y/N proceeded to sit down and say, "Let's get our first date then," she giggles. "I must add that you are attentive ..."

"How so?" he asks, handing her one of the sandwiches he made whilst he poured her a glass of orange juice.

"My ideal first date was always a picnic, so you either stalked one of my interviews or you guessed it on the fly!" she retorts playfully.

"The first ..." he admits with a blush.

She laughs, before retorting. "Remember our first encounter?"

"Yeah, a year ago at the club ... why?" he asks with a confused tone.

"That wasn't our first encounter ..." she chuckles softly. "Our first encounter happened when um ... during your first season in Liverpool, I was thirteen, and my mom took me to one of your first matches, against Manchester United, I stood excited after you guys won and you signed my jersey," she said before adding. "I know it's stalker-ish, but yeah ..."

"Woah ..." he grows silent before his eyes widen, "You mean we met way before."

"Uh huh ..." she nods, "I told you ... I'm a big fan!" she whispers plaufully.

"Well I am still flattered that I have an adorable stalker!" he grins.

A wave of comfortable silence falls between them before she asks, "Xabi?"

"Yeah?" he replies, looking at her.

"You're not ... uncomfortable with our age gap ..." she asks with a hesitant tone. "Right?"

"To be honest, it's a double edged sword, there's going to be a lot of criticism if it goes public, half because of the age gap and the other half because of your father, they'll say I'm dating you to get on his good graces, or worse ... guarantee my spot on the team," he sighs softly before taking a hold of her hand. "I'm willing to take the risk."

Y/N smiled widely before leaning over to press a gentle kiss on his lips. "Then I'm yours!" she whispers.

His face lights up in response, "As am I ..."

It wasn't easy by any means, maintaining a private relationship away from the prying eyes of the public as well as the paparazzi, their meet ups were private as well, mostly in secluded areas or if they're lucky, their houses -as far as the world knew, she was the apple of her father's eye, a beloved singer whilst he was the glue that held the team's midfield together- the consequences of such an affair loomed on top of them, prompting them to be quite careful about how they should handle the pressure of a relationship of this magnitude, and he firmly believed he was able to hide it for a while, until ...

───────────────────────────────

To say it was pure torture to see her standing near her father would be an understatement, she looked absolutely gorgeous in her leggings and oversized t-shirt coupled with the cap was enough to send blood rushing straight to his cock resulting in a groan of frustration to escape him ... Sergio, who noticed his expression leaned over and jokingly said, "Careful not to explode in front of the boss or your Juliet!"

Xabi shot him a deadly glare before his gaze trailed back to her and he noticed her smiling his way which elicited a subtle smile from him, that faded when he noticed Carlo looking his way ... I have to stop or else I'm going to be punished, he reminds himself.

· · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · ·

"Xabi seems to settle in nicely ..." Y/N remarks.

"He is ... his performance in the last few games has been impressive!" Carlo nods before adding, "He's definitely going to start in the upcoming fixture against Inter Milan!"

"He's also cute ..." she murmurs.

"Y/N!" Carlo exclaimed sternly.

"What?" she retorts, "It's not like I lied ..."

"Don't even think about it ..." was all he said before shifting his focus back to training.

Too late ..., Y/N thought to herself as she decided to enter back into the training center.

· · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · ·

Y/N was confused by the text message Xabi had sent her stating that they needed to speak and that it was an emergency, they'd both agreed not to speak to one another whenever she paid her father a visit yet Xabi had insisted, stating that he was hiding in one of the storage closets, "Xabi?" she calls out once she spots the closet in question with the ajar door. "Xa-Oh!" she was immediately dragged in and the door was shut behind her, "Xabi ..." she whispers.

He locks the door then turns to her, "I couldn't wait," he grumbles, wrapping one arm around her waist, and the other around her shoulder to pull her in for a kiss. "You looked so beautiful out there!" he whispers hotly before pressing his lips entirely over hers.

She was stunned for a brief moment before melting almost instantly in his embrace, he gently pushed her up against the wall, hoisting her up so that she'd wrap her legs around his torso. "You do realize we're at risk of being caught," she whispers, a soft moan escapes her lips when his lips descend down to the column of her thorat.

"I know ... but you don't understand," he murmurs, his hand slipping inside her t-shirt, crawling up to cup her breasts through her bra and when he felt the lace, a low groan escapes him. "You tease, you're wearing the red lace bra, aren't you?"

"Yeah ..." she replied breathessly, whining when he squeezed her left breast. "Fuck."

"You're so sexy," he moaned in her ear, hiking her shirt up to press featherlight kisses over the top of her breasts, "And you're all mine," he lowered her bra cups to take one of her nipples in his mouth while his index finger and thumb toyed with the other, eliciting the sweetest of sounds from her.

"Fuck ..." she whines quietly.

His lips trail back up to her neck, her jawline, her cheek then her lips as he whispered, with a teasing tone. "How do you think your dad will react if he finds out his precious princess fucked out of her mind until she could only remember my name?" a grin appears across his lips upon noticing her expression. "Oh Querida, look at you, so beautiful!" he murmurs.

He sets her down then hikes her leggings down to her ankles, pushes her panties to the side, pressing his thumb over her clit to tease her, "Let them hear you, let them all hear you so they'd know who's making you feel good."

"Xabi!" the young female whines, "Please."

He slips his hand inside of his shorts, then boxers to pull out his cock, pumping himself before he slowly pushed his cock into her pussy drawing out the softest cry from her, "There we go," he groans, "Moan for me, moan for me ..."

"Xabi!" Y/N moans, "Fuck ..."

"Your dad would kill me ..." he slams his hips against her own, "His little girl and his player, I'll be done but you know what?" he paused, gently nibbling down on her neck. "You're worth it, so fucking worth it."

"Oh ..." she whines, "Shut up and fuck me."

Xabi grins, "You don't have to tell me twice."

He hoists her up slightly, and begins to move his hips against hers, grunting with each thrust, "There we go, such a good girl taking my cock inside her tight pussy," he praised her, whispering hotly in her ear. "Tell me, do you love it?" he growls, "Do you love feeling my cock deep in your slick tight pussy?"

"Yes .. yes ... OH FUCK YES!" Y/N whines, pulling him closer to her, "Harder!" she cried softly.

His thrusts increased rapidly, "I'm gonna cum ..." he whispers in her ear, "You're going to let me cum in you querida, you're gonna be a good girl and let me cum in you."

"Please ..." Y/N moans, "Please ... please ... please ..."

With one last sharp thrust, his cock twitches and he releases a surge of warmth inside of her followed shortly by her pussy clenching around his cock as they both rode off the waves of their orgasm, "Oh god!" she sighs.

Xabi pulls her in for a kiss before murmuring, "You gotta admit this was hot, ..." he chuckles, "Sex in the storage closet."

"Yeah," she giggles.

Suddenly, they hear ...

"Xabi! ... Xabi!"

The pair quickly redress, and Y/N whispers. "You have to go ... I'll walk out a few minutes after once the coast is clear."

"No, I'm not leaving you ... what if it's the boss?" he whisper shouts.

The sounds grows closer, "Xabi, hermano ...?"

"That's not my dad, that's Sergio ..." Y/N replies, "Let's go out, he already knows we're together."

Xabi sighs softly, "Ok ... let's do that!"

The pair bravely step out of the storage room only to be faced with not just Sergio but indeed, her father as well, "Oh boy!" Xabi whispers under his breath.

Carlo looks between his daughter and Xabi, then looks at Sergio. "What uh ... what's this?"

"Boss, I think it's best if ... they explain!" Sergio said, before excusing himself and leaving the trio standing there in an eerie silence.

"So?" Carlo broke the silence with a stern yet calm tone.

"We can explain ..." Y/N blurts out before growing quiet under her dad's stern stare.

"How long?" Carlo asks calmly.

"A year and ten months." Xabi replies quickly.

"Aha ... so for a year and ten months, you've been decieving my daughter." Carlo deduced, nodding slowly.

"Dad ..." Y/N groans, "He wasn't decieving me, I was the one who fell in love first and you know that."

"That does not change the fact that this relationship is immoral sweetheart, he's ten years older than you." Carlo interjects.

"I'm not a child, I'm almost twenty two." Y/N rolls her eyes, "And besides, Xabi and I are in love."

"In love? after almost two years ..." Carlo retorts incredulously, "Absolutely not, I don't approve of this."

"Sir ... If I may?" Xabi began.

"Shut up ..." Carlo growls.

"Dad!"

"Sir, with all due respect ... I'm going to ask you to listen," Xabi seemed to stand his ground as he continued, "I love your daughter, and you're right, she's ten years younger than me, she could have anyone in the world but she chose me, and I'll ever question why she did just that, however what I can also do, is cherish her, love her, take care of her every need, make sure that she's always happy, because to me, she's more than just your daughter, she's my person, she's my ..." he paused, interlocking his digits with her, "My soulmate."

Her heart softened at Xabi's sweet declaration, she then turned to her father. "Dad I love you, and I will always love you, you're the first man I have ever loved," she sighs, "But I love him, and there's nothing you can do about it, I am standing my ground."

Carlo grew silent for what seemed like an eternity before he said, "Are one hundred per cent committed towards my little girl?"

"Yes, for the rest of my life." Xabi said with a soft tone.

"Then you do realize that while you have managed to charm my daughter, it will take a lot more than that to impress me, football skills aside ..." Carlo states before narrowing his eyes at him, "If you hurt her, break her heart or subject her to anything painful, trust me when I say that you can kiss your football career goodbye."

He knew better than to call bluff on it, Carlo was and still is protective of Y/N. "I understand and I give you my word, ... I will protect Y/N with my life."

"Very well ..." Carlo said then added, "Training's back in fifteen minutes!"

"Ok ..." he breathed out a sigh of relief.

Carlo walked away, however midstep he said. "Hey Xabi?"

"Yeah boss!" Xabi replied.

"Fix your shorts ..."

Xabi scrambled upon the realization that his shorts weren't fixed properly, "Shit!"

Y/N remained silent for a brief moment before she said, "Well that could have gone worse."

"Really?" Xabi arched a brow at her remark, "Your father almost saw my cock and that's what you say."

"He could have found us having sex!" Y/N giggles.

"You are unbelievable," Xabi pulled her in for a kiss.

She happily kissed him back, "At least now it's all out in the open ..." she trails off before teasingly adding. "Daddy."

He grunts, "You do realize I'm going to be rock hard once again."

"Well ..." she grins, "That's why god created your right hand," she leaned over and kissed his cheek, "I'll see you later."

Xabi watched her walk away, letting out a soft sight, she is going to be the death of me.

[alexscribed]

this might sound crazy but i need a fanfic about xabi alonso and fernando alonso. bcs the fact that both of them use (used for xabi) number 14, they were born in the same year, and also they give off some slytherin vibes.

[ftorres-9]

“I liked it when you kissed me, you know”

The words are out before Steven Gerrard can even think about exactly what he’s saying, worry about how Xabi might react. He regrets drinking so much champagne. Of course, he’s referring to approximately 4 hours prior when he had gone in for a mock kiss, meant as just a laugh for the cameras, and Xabi had leaned in and planted a soft, fleeting, peck on Steven’s lips that almost didn’t feel real and yet still managed to send shockwaves though Steven’s entire being. Steven had turned away immediately after, trying to hide his blush, laughing it off, when secretly he had wished it had lasted longer. Not that he’d tell Xabi that, of course. But Steven was much more sober then, and now the truth has burst forth like a dam breaking and there’s no taking it back. And then Xabi responds, he turns to Steven, smiling, his golden eyes holding a knowing glance, and he says in that gorgeous accent “You want another, yes?” And in that moment Steven’s heart skips a beat and he practically shouts “YES!” like a schoolboy about to have his first kiss. It’s not like Steven hasn’t kissed people before; being a famous footballer for Liverpool and England means being desired by models and celebrities and people with power, people like dolls with vacant eyes and expensive clothes who kiss without meaning after too many drinks. Fun, yes, but forgettable. But this is Xabi. This is different.

Before Steven has time to kick himself over his embarrassing level of enthusiasm, Xabi’s lips are on his and this time it’s real, it’s real and it’s electric and Steven’s whole body is on fire and Xabi tastes like champagne and victory and Steven can’t bring himself to stop even though he can hardly breathe and his heart is racing pumping Liverpool red blood through his veins and he can feel Xabi’s heart racing too, Xabi’s body pressed against his fitting just right, and Xabi is warm and feels like home in Steven’s arms, and then suddenly Xabi breaks the spell, pulling back slightly, golden eyes meeting Steven’s, and he says in almost a whisper, “miracles happen in Istanbul, Steven” and Steven holds Xabi a little tighter and replies, without a second thought because he knows, he knows in his heart, in his very soul, “You’re my miracle, Xabi.”

In that moment Steven is in love with everything; with Liverpool, the game, the night, the celebration, the victory, but most of all, Steven is deeply, passionately, undeniably in love with Xabier Alonso Olano.

(This is just me free writing a fanfic for the first time since March 2022, don’t mind it, I’m trying my best, thank you)

[hazel081012]

We Were Only Twenty One

Iker settled into his recliner chair on the balcony and let out a tired sigh. He slowly wiped away the tear stains from his cheeks. Xabi. Xabi Alonso. As always making his heart ache. Although this time it is not his fault. Death is inevitable Iker knows that. But he always thought that he will be the first one to go even though Xabi is only six months younger than him. Xabi had a good life. A happy and successful one, died at the age of seventy six. He was hailed as one of the best midfielders of his generation, had an enviable trophy collection, left the game before it left him and after his retirement he went on to become one of the best managers in football history. His personal life was too a glorious one. A beautiful wife three children. A happy family and some really good friends. Iker was also on that list once upon a time. A close friend. And a lover. Oh how times have changed.

It was November 2002. A new player had joined the Spain national team from u-21 team. A good looking one. Iker couldn't stop blushing whenever their eyes met and the boy couldn't stop smirking at his coloured face. When the boy introduced himself to the team at the locker room Iker instantly decided that he wants to be friends with the Xabi Alonso with sun kissed skin. Maybe he can bestow some kisses on that skin too. Iker appointed himself as the guide for Alonso and walked him through the campus and filled him in on all the details he deemed necessary to be a part of the team. He liked showing off his two year seniority to the newbie. He really wanted to impress Xabi. And funnily enough his efforts hadn't gone unnoticed by his teammates. By the end of the session Raul, Xavi and Puyol were teasing him about his newfound crush and to his utter horror Xabi overheard them. Then much to Iker's joy Xabi started blushing and walked away to the showers leaving him with their teasing teammates. They exchanged numbers the next day. By the end of the week they become friends. On the last day of the training week the team went out for drinks. That was the day Iker learned how much Xabi liked drinking. When the team left the bar Xabi was pretty drunk and Iker was tipsy. Iker still doesn't know who initiated their first kiss. He only have vague images in his mind now. The night sky, cold breeze ,the illuminated shops nearby and Xabi's intoxicating scent mixed with the drinks. All he can remember was them kissing frantically infront of the bar and their teammates interrupting them making some excuses that someone will see them. The two were separated and were led to the hotel. The next day they said their goodbyes and went back to their clubs.

On Christmas Xabi send Iker a text message wishing merry Christmas and Iker quickly replied. On the Newyear's Iker called Xabi on a whim before midnight. And that was their first Newyear together. After that phone calls and text messages become a regular thing. They flirted, shared secrets and their dreams. Every time Xabi messaged or called Iker felt a fluttering feeling in his chest and he wished Xabi felt the same. Then April came and Iker couldn't contain his excitement. On the second week of April real madrid had a match with real sociedad and on the last day of april spain had a friendly with Ecuador. That meant a lot of xabi alonso. On the day of match against sociedad iker was bursting with anticipation and it earned him funny looks from his teammates and a knowing smirk from raul. They went on to the pitch and he and xabi shooks hand as non chalantly as possible. The game started and sociedad had outplayed them. Iker who was determined to impress xabi wad humiliated when the opponents scored four goals against him. And he didn't know if he should be angry or amused when one of them was scored by xabi himself. Xabi played amazingly and iker felt a little bit proud. After the game xabi took iker out for dinner and after it iker invited xabi over to his room. With the help of raul he smuggled xabi into his room without anyone noticing. The moment the door closed behind them xabi had iker pinned against the door and started kissing him passionately and he reciprocated kindly. Soon they were undressing each other and stumbled into the bed. The first round ended too quickly, both were impatient for release from pining after each other for months and the touch of others fist was enough to send them over the edge. After that they took their time mapping each others body with hands and mouth and fucking each other into the mattress. They stayed all night up talking and kissing and to till this day it is one of the happiest nights in iker's life. If he try hard enough he can still remember every bit of it as it has happened yesterday.

After that night they become incredibly close and iker realised he was falling in love. International break came and the two were allotted in the same room. They fucked like rabbits and never ran out of topics to talk. But they took great care in showing no signs of affection when they were in public. All of their shenanigans were limited to the privacy of their room. When the game was over and xabi went back iker's heart was full of love. It was xabi who professed his love first. On iker's 22nd birthday xabi visited him in madrid. Iker was slightly nodding off when xabi said that he was in love with iker, sleep long gone iker couldn't stop the happy tears. Iker told xabi he felt the same and the smile that formed on xabi's face at that moment is the most beautiful thing he has ever seen in his entire life.

At the next national training session raul, puyol and xavi found out about their love affair. After that raul invited iker, xabi, xavi and puyol to his place. And the three of them asked about their relationship, plans and how serious are they about each other. Him and xabi confessed their undying love for each other to them. Now that he thinks about it he can't help but laugh at their innocence. Undying love. Oh how young were them, how foolish thinking their love could conquer everything, that it could withstand the obstacles of time. Raul, bless his heart patiently explained to them that they will have to choose either their career or their relationship cause world was a cruel place and how homosexual players could never make it big once they publicly acknowledge their sexuality. Then him and xabi made the most stupid plan to ever exist. That they will keep their relationship a secret and will go public when both of them retires. It all seemed so easy and simple at that time. Needless to say raul wasn't impressed neither was puyol. Xavi seemed to be more on agreement with iker and xabi.

A year soon went by and their love thrived eventhough there were occasional stumbles. Being in two cities was difficult. The first serious strain on their relationship was Nagore. Xabi's childhood sweetheart. It turned out that he still had feelings for her. After much discussions and screaming matches they decided that theirs will be an open relationship. But with conditions applied. Both of them will not see any other men. In case of Xabi he can pursue Nagore and Iker can sleep with or see any women he fancies. Then came the transfer window were Xabi chose Liverpool over real Madrid. Xabi chose Liverpool over him. He was devastated by Xabi's betrayal. Then came steven Gerrard. Oh how he hated that guy. He knew they were only friends but it didn't stop him from spending moments imagining him beating the shit out of Gerrard. Xabi won UCL with Liverpool in his first season. He even scored the equalising goal which turned him into a Liverpool hero. Then came the moment that broke Iker's heart forever. During their celebration Xabi and Gerrard kissed infront of everyone. When him and Xabi wouldn't even let each other's gaze linger on the other when in public, Xabi was kissing a man for everyone to see. After that he refused to attend Xabi's calls even when Xabi called Raul and asked for him he refused to speak. It was one of his biggest mistake cause it pushed Xabi closer to Nagore who had no problems with the kiss. That was when he found Sergio to whom he shared all his sorrows. He refused to trouble Raul with his problems who already warned him in the beginning.

Then the next international break came. Xabi begged for a chance to explain himself and with Sergio's pressure he agreed to it. And soon everything was back to normal and they were that lovey dovey couple again. And he was himself again. Next two years went by in bliss. He dated some women on the side but nothing felt right but with Xabi far away he needed ways for his sexual pleasures. Then Xabi got Nagore pregnant. He didn't know how to feel about it nor figure out how does the baby fit into their future plans. Then Jon was born he felt so happy for Xabi and Nagore and also for himself. Xabi had sent him the picture of the newborn saying 'our son is here'. Then Sara came into his life and suddenly everything changed. For once it was Xabi's turn to get jealous. Oh and they also won the euro cup. It was a roller coster of a year. Next year Xabi got married to Nagore and he felt something die inside him. He knew whatever happens they were still on board with their plan. It was also the year Xabi got transfered to real Madrid.

Xabi never wore his wedding ring in Iker's presence. In Madrid him, Xabi , Sergio and Arbeloa formed a clique. And the next three years was the best times of his life. They were always together, him and Xabi, except for the four weeks in summer. Little Ane was born. They even won though world cup together. It seemed like finally everything has fallen into place and their future was promising. Even Puyol and Xavi were surprised by the turn of events. Only Raul remained skeptical. Both Sergio and Alvaro were in total support for them. Claiming when he and Xabi gets married they will be our bestmen. It was a beautiful dream. But unfortunately it stayed only as a dream.

It was in 2010 that Jose Mourinho came to real Madrid. The special one. The special one he will never forget. The special one that ruined everything for him. At first it was great. Mourinho was a great coach and they had fun working together. Xabi easily become Mourinho's favourite. Then 2012 came they won the euro's again. Sometimes after that everything went to downhill. Their future, their plans, dreams and their love for each other. What started as a disagreement between him and Mourinho suddenly escalated. And Alvaro chose the side of the coach. And to his disappointment Xabi also chose Mou's side. Sergio tried to smooth things out with them but it didn't worked. Soon him and Xabi stopped talking only communicating when it was necessary for the game. Also he decided to start a family with Sara. Mourinho left Madrid in 2013 but the division he created never left.

He and Sara welcomed martin into the world in 2014 the year Emma was also born. When Ancelotti become the manager he easily picked on the tension between their former clique and asked us to figure things out between ourselves. We tried and failed. Yet we tried. Then came the world cup failure. Oh how it hurts. The only good thing that came out of it was him and Xabi finding comfort in each others body. It was the last time he ever held Xabi in his arms, felt those strong hands wrapped around him, felt those lips on his, and listened to those heartbeats when he fell asleep. After that he felt that maybe they can sort out their differences. Still have that future they once dreamed about. But then suddenly one day he was informed that Xabi is leaving for Bayern. He remembers feeling numb, empty crying his heart out on Sergio's shoulder. Xabi has betrayed him again. Then Xabi left without even saying a goodbye.

Then Xabi made some comments about how his new goalkeeper was the best he has ever played with and Iker refused to let it affect him. He also left Madrid the following year. It didn't felt the same after Xabi left. Then Xabi said to some press how he was legend or something. It did make him feel good. But didn't change anything.  Whatever they had was already destroyed. He married Sara and they become parents again with the birth of Lucas. His wife and their babies made him happy. When the news of Xabi's retirement came he felt a little throb in place of what used to be gut wrenching pain. His retirement was supposed to be the start of something. Then Iker retired. The day he made that decision he felt so hollow inside. Years went by and his marriage fell apart but Xabi's only become stronger. They had occasionally crossed each others path but never made any efforts to talk or become friends. Raul was right all along. But the funny thing is that him and Xabi never officially broke up. 

So still sometimes he couldn't help but wonder about what could have been. As years went by now he can't even recreate Xabi's face from his memories. The man he fell in love with was a youth with twinkling eyes and sun kissed skin. And he no longer exist. Buried in the past where they lost their love. Buried along with a smooth faced boy brimming with innocence and hope who loved him.

Now he longs for that November. To look at that smirking face and blush again. To kiss under the night sky. To believe their love is enough. To be twenty one again.

[nicolesainz]

Oh there is definitely a fanfic coming. As soon as I found those pics, I HAD to write something. Xabi Alonso is THE man.

[swaggypsyduck]

Opinions?

my non-footy friend loves reading fanfics for other fandoms. and after nearly completing the hockey rpf tag (she's never played or watched hockey) she moved onto the football rpf (she's only ever watched the morocco vs france wc22 match). after filtering the usual tags out she's given me a list and i've been ordered to share it w yall and to get ur opinions on this. she has ordered them by which pairings she feels have the best written fics to numbers ratio sice she has no idea who these ppl r and ships none of them.

DISCLAIMER: SHE DOES NOT KNOW ANY PERSONAL INFO ABOUT THESE PLAYERS OR THE CONTROVERSIES THEY HAVE

her list is as follows:

1. Sergio Ramos/Fernando Torres

2. Sergio Ramos/Iker Casillas

3. Neymar/Lionel Messi

4. Xabi Alonso/Steven Gerrard

5. Sergio Ramos/Gerard Pique

6. Marco Reus/Mario Götze

7. Cristiano Ronaldo/Lionel Messi

8. Thomas Müller/Manuel Neuer

9. Lukas Podolski/Bastian Schweinsteiger

10. Dele Alli/Eric Dier

her thoughts on this: (tw/soccer)

dont mind the time stamps she's not muslim she just cant sleep. she also demands recs for players 20+ bc and i quote "can only take looking up geriatric pics for so long"

[footballffbarbiex]

I also feel that with the amount of players that are popular currently, it's hard to keep up. When I started writing, there was like a handful (or what felt like a handful) of players that were trending. I guess that is also tied to how well national teams are doing in EUROs or world cups, like you said, but I also think it's linked to how well teams are doing in their respective leagues. I can still remember the sheer amount of Arsenal fanfics I read, or how popular Real Madrid and Barça were (lol, Barça wishes it was still as popular. I don't watch football for a few years and things have gone to shit apparently? And is Real still popular? I only paid attention because of Xabi Alonso) I completely agree that it feels like wasted energy pouring so much love into something that seems to end up in a void. Fandom is fickle and I still haven't figured out whether it's because of allegiances to certain clubs/players that make it so certain fics flop, or whether there's a different reason.

If you ever need to rant about the fandom, my ask is always open. Please take care of yourself and your joy ❤

yes! when i started on here it was very much the same. we would have a small pool of writers, some of who wrote exclusively for woc OC's, some were for everyone, but mostly it was leagues that weren't PL. if you did it was Arsenal and United. now it's the other way around, it's PL dominated with a small pool of players who now get written about and player interest absolutely changes depending on if they're benched or succeeding.

blurbs the length of the paragraph i've just written get a shit ton of notes and longer pieces don't, unless you're certain writers. people ask for updates of xyz but then can't find the ask box to send feedback. tumblr is a very different experience to what it was, and i'm not sure what's happening but i definitely feel lost rn.

if you find a reason, let me know because i can't figure it out either 😂

[berlinini]

steven gerrard once got overwhelmed with emotion after winning the champions league in 2005 and kissed xabi alonso right there on the pitch, spawning 358375783 fanfics. he's 10000% straight but he kinda became an accidental gay football icon for a while lol.

really getting my master's in steven gerrard studies uh 😆

OK BUT would he be "10000% straight" if Louis Tomlinson was flirting with him??? Maybe Steven was overwhelmed with emotion after seeing Louis' beauty and kissed him right there?

And that is how Louis got this Gerrard 4 jersey...

[skrtl]

I didn't know LiveJournal still exists

&

I had forgotten how early Gerlonso fics are the best

[kloppinthekop]

A Gerlonso fic written for the footballkinkmeme August prompt: myth/legend. Excerpts from each vignette:

1.       The Legend Forever:

That night, he dreams a strange dream. It comes to him from a time even further removed than the days of Istanbul. […] He dreams that he is Orpheus, the father of songs, son of King Oeagrus, earthly progeny of the Muse Calliope. Apollo, god of music, has gifted him a golden lyre that sings like water passing over glistening pearls. Aphrodite, the goddess of love, has gifted him a wife who gleams like starlight over lush fields of wheat. Eurydice.

2.       Broke Me Heart:

However, they could not aspire to reach the peak of their desire and one day came when torn apart, one left, and one said: “Broke me heart.”

3.      I Missed You Every Day:

Stevie, however, has never left. Sure, he has traded Liverpool for Ibrox, Glasglow, but his heart is still in Great Britain, isn’t it? He’s still here. Waiting. Waiting for his once-and-future king.

[nemolfc]

𝐧𝐨𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐝 - 𝐱𝐚𝐛𝐢 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐨

• 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲: 𝐦𝐞

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐱𝐢𝐞𝐭𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐲, 𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞..

𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐚𝐧𝐱𝐢𝐞𝐭𝐲, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐛𝐮𝐬𝐞.

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬𝐧'𝐭 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐢 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐜 𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐢 𝐡𝐚𝐝 (𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐞 … 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭, 𝐢 𝐚𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐢 𝐚𝐦 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐮𝐩 𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐲𝐥𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐯𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐛𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐫𝐲.)

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭: @ts1m1kas , @inqloriouzlauren , @anfieldroad . @luvr4miya, @liverpool-enjoyer, @writtenbykirs , @anifffff , @mountsgirl , @houseofdolan

it occurred once more…

each year, as christmas approaches, her phone vibrates with the familiar notification of a text message; not just any message, but one from her mother – a perpetual reminder of the bloodline that once tethered her to them, despite her escape from their toxic grasp nearly a decade prior.

𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐬?

every year, she acquiesced; yet, with each visit, an unrelenting flood of memories overwhelmed her thoughts – they had ridiculed her for her behavior, which had later been understood as symptomatic of her mental illness. they never had faith in her, belittled her passion for writing, and dismissed her as nothing more than a sluggish blogger. ironically, they still held these views... and the most painful of all, they mocked her appearance, perpetually comparing her to her siblings, a cruel action that only deepened the abyss she had already fallen into.

"amor?"

startled by xabi's soft voice, she flinched and swiftly erased any remnants of her tears, offering a faint, tentative smile before responding. "yes?"

xabi raised an eyebrow, though he refrained from pressing further. "tomorrow, the club is hosting a christmas eve celebration. i was curious if you'd be interested in attending."

she paused, uncertainty clouding her thoughts, torn between the fear of an impending panic attack and the desire to accept. "i'll go, can't allow the gaffer to appear alone!" she declared with a delicate smile.

xabi inclines his head gently, "good!" he falls quiet for a beat, then, his voice laced with uncertainty, inquires, "are you all right?"

she chews her lip, torn between disclosing the truth or concealing it—her battle with anxiety and depression was no secret to those in her inner circle, yet when she encountered xabi at a gathering through mutual acquaintances, she chose to keep that fragment of herself hidden, unwilling to overwhelm him with the weight of her struggles.

"i am fine, fine ... just, anxious about the publisher not responding to me yet!" she shrugged it off, and the prospect of whether or not i am going to travel back to see my family. she thought to herself.

xabi found her claims utterly unconvincing, not for a moment did he buy into her flimsy deception, knowing well her lack of skill in fabrication. "he’s likely preoccupied, especially with it being christmas, so don't fret, amor… now, hurry up and get dressed, let's dine out!"

a smile curled on her lips, grateful for the proposal. "alright!"

"i don't…" she murmurs with a sigh, "i… i can't say." she completes her attire before adding, "let's go!"

oh... something was undoubtedly wrong, xabi mused inwardly. throughout the journey, he observed her distracted demeanor, subtly intertwined with a trace of melancholy, as though she were lost in thought, reminiscing about something unsettling. what could it be?he pondered.

they arrive at a charming locale, one that exudes both intimacy and seclusion. xabi had forged a connection with the proprietor, securing them a secluded booth, shielded from the scrutiny of any onlookers. "you'll adore this place, amor," he remarked. "i stumbled upon it during my first months living here."

she compels a smile, one she is now very much aware is unmistakably contrived. "i trust you, xabi," she murmurs in a gentle tone.

xabi's agitation deepened with every fleeting moment. why was she acting in such an uncharacteristic manner? this was not her, never had been. throughout the years they had shared, he had witnessed only the gentleness, compassion, radiance, kindness, and endearing innocence that had first captivated him when they crossed paths at that party. now, he found himself confronted with an ethereal, hollow semblance of the person he had once cherished, as though the vibrant essence of her had dissipated entirely.

the waiter set down her meal, and as he had anticipated, she scarcely touched it—taking only a few bites while half-heartedly conversing with him. "i need to figure out what's troubling her," he murmured to himself.

after a seemingly tranquil dinner, the duo resolved to conclude their evening with a film. she nestled against him, yet her attention to the movie was fleeting as her mind drifted back to the time her sister launched an all-out assault, merely because she had apparently overlooked hanging up a blouse she had intended to wear.

"good grief, y/n, must you continue with this 'oh, look at me, i'm so clumsy' act? for fuck's sake, grow up already. you're not a child anymore. just because you're the youngest doesn't entitle you to act this way any longer."

her mother, an even more significant source of the psychological and emotional distress, intervened, subtly chastising her by suggesting that she ought to concentrate more, accusing her of acting like a bumbling imbecile, almost as if she were intentionally disregarding the countless instances when she had begged for help.

"why can't you be more like y/f/n? she's far more intelligent, poised, and doesn't exhibit the clumsiness you seem to perpetuate. it's as though i raised a circus monkey, not a child."

just then, without even fully recognizing it, she was overcome with emotion, tears streaming down her face in a torrent. xabi, ever perceptive, immediately took note of her distress and enveloped her in a tender embrace. "amor, hey… hey, what’s the matter? what happened?"

"what … what are you implying—y/n, y/n, oh my goodness y/n, Y/N!!!!"

without comprehension of the events that had transpired, she succumbed to the enveloping darkness, slipping into an abyss of unconsciousness; xabi, overwhelmed by dread, swiftly summoned an ambulance and accompanied her, his anxiety mounting with each passing moment as they neared the hospital. in a state of helplessness, he observed with a growing sense of despair as she was ushered further inside, the nurses instructing him to remain in suspense until the doctors had concluded all requisite examinations.

approximately forty minutes elapsed, each second stretching interminably, until the doctor finally emerged, calling out, "y/n y/l/n..."

xabi stood, his voice laced with a subtle note of apprehension. "how is she?" he inquired, a trace of worry lingering in his tone.

"fortunately, she is faring better now. we have administered the essential vitamins she had been deficient in over the past several days. it appears that she may have either been neglecting her medication or intentionally omitting meals, which is particularly detrimental for individuals with pcos. ..." the doctor elucidates, before inquiring, "does she have any prior history of mental health disorders?"

xabi furrows his brow in perplexity and mutters, "pcos… mental health disorders? she never mentioned this to me?"

"her medical records indicate that she experiences anxiety and depression, both of which can be distinct disorders or manifestations of pcos," the doctor elucidates with a tone of empathy. "additionally, it seems that miss y/l/n has a propensity for neglecting meals, as evidenced by her past medical history."

xabi was utterly flabbergasted, to put it mildly. "well... may i see her?" he inquires.

the physician inclines his head affirmatively, "she's located in room 450, just over there," he articulates while gesturing toward the specified room.

xabi trudged forward, each step burdened by an invisible yet crushing weight, akin to an anvil tethered to his soul. the oppressive sensation did not relent until he finally arrived at the room, where his gaze fell upon her—unconscious, her frail form tethered to an array of unyielding monitors. an intense wave of anguish surged through him, its sharp edges slicing through his composure as he moved closer to her bedside. sinking into the chair adjacent to her, he exhaled a heavy, trembling sigh. "amor," he murmured, his voice scarcely above a whisper, laden with sorrow, "why did you keep this from me?"

after a brief interlude, her companion, madeline, made her entrance. "xabi!" she exclaimed, her expression shadowed by a deep frown. "i received the call and got here as quick as i can. what happened?"

xabi exhales deeply, a palpable weight in his voice. "the physician revealed that her collapse was precipitated by neglecting nourishment, exacerbated further by anxiety and pcos. why… why did she conceal this from me?"

madeline mirrors his exasperation, her voice soft yet tinged with concern. "i was under the impression she had confided in you."

xabi quirked an inquisitive brow, "surely not ... what happened? what could compel her to act this way, and why has she concealed it from me?"

madeline regarded him with a contemplative gaze, deliberating whether to unveil the truth. “did she ever disclose why she remains estranged from her family?”

xabi shook his head, the weight of unspoken questions lingering. in the three years they had shared their lives, she had never uttered a word about her family. he had long assumed that her silence stemmed from an unwillingness to broach the topic, a deliberate severance of ties, or perhaps something graver—a concealed truth that her family remained unaware of their relationship altogether.

madeline gazes at her with a furrowed brow, her expression marked by a subtle but undeniable disquiet. "her family had subjected her to a lifetime of emotional and psychological torment. as the youngest, or perhaps more accurately, the middle child, she was perpetually made to feel as though she was an outlier—be it due to her appearance, her actions, or her demeanor. she was never the most intelligent, the most beautiful, nor the one who garnered the accolades. the relentless damage inflicted by her parents had ingrained within her a belief that she was inherently inadequate, a belief that still lingers within her to this day."

to claim that he was astounded would be an egregious understatement; it explained the reason behind her difficulty in discussing the subject of children, much less the notion of a joyful future, for her very own progeny made her feel as though she was undeserving of such aspirations.

"i can't believe she never told me ..." xabi whispers in astonishment, he looks at madeline. "why?"

"she was reluctant to impose upon you, … her desire was for you to have a girlfriend deserving of media attention, yet, the media has not been particularly favorable towards her." madeline shakes her head.

xabi exhales deeply, having perused the articles where they derided her for failing to conform to the aesthetic of a runway model. if anything, he admired that she deviated from that mold; she was a woman, an authentic woman. "i urged her to ignore them!"

"it's never that straightforward when anxiety and depression govern her existence!" madeline responds, a melancholic smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.

"xabi, do take care of her, for given her mother’s nature, she is undoubtedly inquiring whether she intends to visit them tomorrow," madeline spoke gently, her tone laced with concern.

xabi nodded, his gaze lingering on madeline as she exited the room. he then turned to y/n, his voice soft but insistent. "wake up, amor, please."

about an hour later, y/n gradually rouses from her slumber, her eyes squinting as they acclimate to the blinding illumination of the room. her gaze falls upon xabi, who is clutching her hand while seated awkwardly in the chair, his posture far from restful. "xabi," she uttered weakly, her voice raspy from the remnants of sleep.

he stirs awake without delay, murmuring "amor..." in a breathy whisper, a sigh of relief escaping him as his hand gently brushes her face. "do you feel better?" he inquires softly.

she responds with a slow nod, her gaze fixed on him as he reaches for the glass of water, assisting her in taking a substantial sip. "what happened to me?" she queries, her voice tinged with confusion.

"you fainted... after we had dinner, and whilst we were engrossed in the film!" he elucidated. "the physician asserted that you've been neglecting your meals!"

"xabi, i..." she attempted to justify herself.

"no, no, it's alright... madeline confided everything to me!" xabi responded, his own gaze brimming with tears. "why didn't you confide in me?"

"i was scared ... scared you'd leave me, my own family didn't want me around, it's why i left them ..." she replies, feeling ashamed.

"well," xabi murmurs with a weary sigh. "you can address them when we return home, and tell them that you will never lay eyes on them again. from this moment forward, i will be your family, and my family will become yours." he whispers tenderly, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. "i love you more than words can express, amor, and from now on, there will be no more secrets between us."

"i love you too," she says, her smile tinged with tears.

true to his word, once she was discharged, she dialed her mother's number and calmly explained that she would never speak to them again, unless it was an absolute emergency. xabi stood steadfastly by her side as she spoke, offering comfort through his soothing embrace. when the call ended, she turned to him and whispered, "thank you, i couldn’t have done this without you."

he held her close, his voice filled with unwavering devotion, "i love you, amor, and i promise to protect you from anyone who dares to harm you."

[eselcolacao]

Gerlonso Fanfic Marathon

boy what a fucking b l i s s

[wrotefootballficiregretnothing]

u guys, the best reviewer in my writing group left me a note about my "use of bodies* and body language to create meaningful imagery. [...] visuals that are so genuine and universal that we can get an emotion without cliché." And I blurted out: years of reading and writing about dudes who want to bang each other but tragically CANNOT will do that to you. So I kind of want to die, but also I kind of want to keep digging that hole all the way like: "Bro, you should try my much more talented friends who made me a better writer. I mean you're going to cry blood at Rave's stuff, but IT'LL BE WORTH IT!"

[theflyingfeeling]

Top 5 most handsome footballers (because we watch it for the sport) & top 5 fanfic recs :)

- Oohhh. 

I mean, I haven’t done the research yet for this World Cup. I did go through the teams yesterday on the official website but not all of the teams had pictures of the players for some reason. Very disappointing, because I TOTALLY watch it for the sport. But here’s my list based on what I’ve seen over the years: 

1. Fernando Torres, always- Xabi Alonso, or as we know him, gingerbeardman- Iker Casillas, our lord and saviour- Alvaro Morata, poor baby, needs to be protected- I kinda wanna say Yannick Carrasco or Antoine Griezmann or James Rodriguez but I’m gonna have to say Antonio Candreva oldie but goodie 

And for the fanfic recs, dude, of ALL the fanfics in the world? tbqh I haven’t been reading that much fanfiction recently so I’m just gonna choose 5 random CaPri fics from the rec list I made you last year. 

- Love of the Second Star- Touch You- lonely without you;-Nikandros Doesn’t Get Paid Enough For This- Slow It Down (this one wasn’t in the list but it’s a hockey AU and I’m a simple woman; I see the word ‘hockey’, I read it) 

I do love my AUs, and I’m also shamelessly recommending everyone my ski jumping AU fic, coming to AO3s near your some time this summer (the introductory chapters at least), possibly mid-July when I have returned from Lapland. 

[carraville]

 year in fic review (2017)

using the wonderful @neyvenger​ ‘s template! everyone should do this i wanna read <3

Year at a glance:  Total number of completed stories: 25 (26 if u count hockey) Total word count:  146929

Overall Thoughts:

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d predicted?  LOTS MORE it’s probly bc i wrote a hella lot while jumping from train to train traveling all of Europe, and probly bc i gave up on school by mid-sem last year, and probly bc the only thing i can do at work that looks like i’m still doing work when i’m not is write 

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January? The fuCKING GERMS i blame it on germs like i 100% would never have thought i’d write 16k of thomasfips who does that also joemilly??? but i luff

What’s your own favorite story of the year? i dont have one i love and hate them all equally... i guess strangeways here we come just bc i took so damn long to write it and tbf i didn’t write a lot of carraville this year so it was kind of like my One and Only 

Did you take any writing risks this year?

writing a lot of people I didn’t know how to write, writing about a lot of Big Things (particularly on the bridge between starshine and clay) that i wasn’t sure about, writing a lot of aus i’d never done before, writing ??? PORN???? even tho ive never banged anyone in my life

Do you have any fanfic or profic goals for the new year? all 12 months of football prompts! hopefully! and writing more new ships and meeting more people and reading good fic  also finally doing all my historical aus bc if there’s one thing i’ve learnt this year, it’s not to give a shit what other people want and just write what u want even if no one is going to read it xoxo

From my past year of writing, what was…

My best story of this year: from a writing perspective i think an die nachgeborenen just bc it was the most? complete, i guess? and plotty? like if i changed the names and pretended it wasn’t creepy i could probably send it for rejection 

My most popular story of this year:  strangeways, here we come i guess cos i published it around that time the r*dditors were sneaking around lmao

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion:  the wonder of my world cos it’s niche and manc but!!!!!!! i love my mancs

Most fun story to write: fuckin.  30 Shades Of Red

Story with the single sexiest moment: The Anonymous Present That Appeared For Sab’s Birthday That Doesn’t Exist 

Most “holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you” story: Again, The Anonymous Present that Doesn’t Exist 

Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters: I’m pretty set when it comes to characters, I guess, because I only like writing when I understand them, but maybe Aubade bc I’d never written Iker till then and I really liked how it turned out

Hardest story to write:  summer sang in me a little while bc it was a) wrestling with a Lot of Football feelings that I didn’t know how to talk about, b) wresting with trashbag xabi alonso and what I thought of him vs. what other people thought of him, c) writing ships and people I had 0 idea about

Biggest surprise:  i like germs! wtf

Highlights + Wrap-up:  ok I TRIED TO PICK DIFFERENT ONES FROM ALL FIC 

Favorite Opening Lines (3):

when the world was ours

There's a crunch. There's a crunch and it's over. 

the setting sun is sweetest last

When all the hands have been shaken and hugs exchanged someone presses a microphone into his hands and he fumbles, not quite sure how to put what he's feeling into words. Eventually he settles for something about looking towards the final on Saturday and he sees David from the corner of his eye shaking his head, almost as if to say: god, Gaz, how do you manage to make everything about United when this should be about you.

In the end, it's simple.

cheesed to meet you

Philipp calls Thomas first, because he always calls Thomas first.

"I didn't do it," Thomas says immediately, with the kind of well-practiced plausibility that only comes from doing the things he says he hasn't done.

Favorite Closing Lines (4):

yes, yes, we are magicians

You jog back to the halfway line. Your face must be shining under the lights, and you wonder if mum's in the crowd, smiling. Let's go to Wembley some day. Rooney rolls the ball to you and you're off again, no marcus's ball scribbled into the patchy leather, no divots and pot-holes in a sandy, well-worn pitch.

You're nineteen years old and going to the Euros.

Every blade of grass here is the exact same height.

in this story we belong to ourselves

Liverpool is. A river that runs before two men who used to have numbers on their backs and now have a house no longer empty. A stream of memories and breaking apart and going again. The Mersey, quiet, grey, flowing gently through the Narrows and out into the great big sea, ever so slightly out of reach.

Variation IX

He says I've missed you, mate.

I say You know, I thought you might.

He says I hope you missed me too.

I say Well of course, otherwise where would I go for Christmas this year?

And then he starts laughing and I start laughing and we laugh and laugh and don’t stop until he kisses me again.

yes, there will be song

You step back and turn, take the steps two at a time. Somewhere outside Anfield there's a man with a shirt that's as as red as the names on the back. He's got a scarf around his neck like a docker, and he presses his face to the Shankly gates like he's kissing a trophy. Make us dream, he whispers, a secret he's never told anyone else, his heart heavy and his eyes tired but his body trembling with a belief too full for words. Above him, the sky is golden.

Favorite Lines From Anywhere (5):

strangeways, here we come

It's weak against Paraguay, it's tired against Paraguay, but the England fans are singing and they have to listen. Countries are not clubs. This sinks deeper than loyalty, at once more insular and more ubiquitous than Liverpool or United could ever be. There are little flags hung up in Sainsbury's, strangers with their arms round each other in pubs, the radios of an electronics store tuned in to Radio 5 Live. Come on England. Bandied about like a mantra, a swear word, a secret password offered by old hands who brace themselves for more disappointment with a nudge and a wink. England always - a host of words go here, crash out , fuck up , lose , but -

Believe rises above them all. Maybe it's delusional. Maybe it's arrogant. Beckham takes a free kick that delights and astonishes the way his free kicks do and it ends up in the back of the net. Every four years St George goes back up and people who still remember '66 are bought a pint, and for every we'll go out at the group stages there's an underlying thread of god help me, we might win this yet, because what is hope if not alive?

Come on England. The cup awaits you and is yours.

sekrit yuletide fic

In his dreams he doesn't leave. Salvador Iglesias Sr. doesn't die and Chava doesn't become a dickhead. He keeps the number on his back and the band around his arm. He doesn't cheat on Ximena, but he tells her, and they part as best friends. In his dreams they win the championship. And again the next year, and again the one after that. Each time Potro scores the winning goal and Moi runs to him to celebrate and Potro kisses him for the whole world to see, over and over, until their lips are numb and all they know are themselves.

summer sang in me a little while

Why are you still here? you ask him. It is easier that way. He turns to you, dark circles under his eyes, and doesn't reply. Only reaches over to tangle his calloused fingers in your hair, rests his forehead against yours.  This time you are the one who leans forward to kiss him, immersing yourself in the warmth of his skin. You taste his blood. You taste the salt and iron of his blood.

the wonder of my world

What makes a club? Love, belief, hope - and someone to attach it to, the player everyone grows up watching, whose name is instantly recognisable to the point that you don't have to mention who he plays for next. Who pours his soul into the game and hammers his heart onto the crest. You don't get that kind of player very often. United were lucky to have three.

So here. The last musketeer. He's not looking at the crowd anymore, just the middle distance. Still the thousands sing. Love, belief, hope, and memories. Ryan might never run again but Paul realises that it doesn't matter. It's that he's already run. And in a hundred years from now someone might pull up a grainy youtube video and watch the number eleven on the left wing and fall in love, all over again. The way he was meant to be loved. Ball at his feet. Red.

an die nachgeborenen

"I don't need a plan," Thomas says, like he's talking to a child. "That's the beauty of it. All I have to do is wait and see what happens. It's only – " he smiles again, wan, quiet. "Well. You know."

The refrain arcs, jagged, through Philipp's head.

"I promised you wouldn't die."

"I won't." Thomas stands up, leaves a hand on Philipp's shoulder. His palm is still warm. "I'm invincible, didn't I tell you?"

And with a single, chipper whistling note, he hits the exit button and slips out, the door closing immediately behind him with a gentle click .

Fic Goals for 2018:

i wna write gifts that people will like :> aka MORE NICHE BULLSHIT 

[howsareeasy]

snowflake challenge day 03/04

This post is for @itsadrizzit. We were talking about fandom and the types of fics we like to read. I'm of the opinion that fandom fests tend to force people to do their best work, because they have to write clearly, and be less indulgent because (a) they are writing for someone else and (b) most times they have betas and a tight turn around which makes for better stories. For her fandom wish list wherein she wanted curated fic recs, I come bearing gifts.

All this fic is football RPF. Miscellaneous pairings. Please read ratings, warnings, etc at the source. Please leave comment at source if you feel moved.

who caught and sang the sun in flight it's not as though you've never considered it, leaving, playing somewhere else, living some other version of this life. but each time, you've consoled yourself with eventually, eventually.eventually arrives earlier than you expect. Francesco Totti, the last Kaiser, steps down from his throne. Totti is Roma, has always been Roma, so what happens when he realises that he can't be Roma anymore? This was written by the incomparable @ourseparatedcities. It's poetic, it's all your past, present and futures at once. It is eternity. The second person might feel a bit giddy in the first paragraph, but keep at it, there's a time when it just clicks and you realise that the story couldn't have been written any other way

Those Who Favor Fire The Cold has claimed the world and Fernando doesn't expect to find warmth ever again. Serio Ramos/ Fernando Torres. This story is BLEAK. Apocalyptic ice age, no sunshine- and the ending is ambiguous, but I chose to read it as happy. So there.

All In White Two trophyless seasons that redefine Real Madrid. Iker Casillas/Sergio Ramos. Is this story kinda... bitter? Yes, it is. In the way that Real Madrid as an entity can be crushing to its players and clubs

The Future Perfect Gareth's an English instructor, Real Madrid are his students, no one ever does their homework. Gareth Bale/Cristiano Ronaldo. I liked this story because of the ESL angle and the writer has a gentle and funny sense of humour

The Thin Line Between Love And Love Raúl and Fernando are happy together until they come face to face with the ghosts from their past. Sergio Ramos/Fernando Torres

The Circle Game During the World Cup, Jan tells Mousa that he's thinking about transferring to Barcelona. Jan Vertonghen/ Mousa Dembele The fic traces their relationship from boys to men and their career paths along the way. The fic is lovely in the best way of the word. A fic about made families, the binds that stretch and stretch but never breaks. The author notes are a good read too

Put an ocean and a river between everything, yourself and home Life resembles a novel more often than novels resemble life. - George Sand. Or in which they realize there's certain kind of love between them after all. Steven Gerrard/Xabi Alonso. Listennnnnnnnn. Gerlonso is my catnip, my jam. This is a fic with these men in the Twilight of their careers - Steven Gerrard, the prince who stayed at a decaying kingdom, Xabi Alonso, the nomad/mercenary who found gold in other kingdoms - but at times, he thinks it might be tin. *clap hands emoji* This story made me BLEED in the best way

When I am With You, There’s No Place I’d Rather Be Four times Khiry impulsively touched Mix’s hair and two times he very deliberately touched Mix’s hair.It's MLS fic, that's all I got, Drizzit. The writer is a good one, going by her past works, but I haven't read the fic. But I'm putting it here

coalition government How do you know Professor Guardiola, Herr Lahm? Philip Lahm/Pep Guardiola. What I like is how European this fic feels in terms of government, policy, etc. The characters feel like themselves, even though the fic is entirely too short

It Fits Me In football, if you’re unhappy, you’re never lucky, Marcelo says. After the transfer to Manchester United falls through, Navas realises how true it is. Keylor Navas/Marcelo Viera. Written by me. Because somehow, I keep getting Real Madrid prompts in exchanges for some strange reason. I’m only including this here because you like Real Madrid fanfic.

Good Timing Gerlonso -  a futurefic AU in which Stevie is a commentator and Xabi is Real Madrid’s manager and they finally, finally get together. And here we are. Porny AF, but brilliant