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valle-de-sombra-de-muerte · 4 months ago

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Homestuck Reread: Act 4, Part 1/4 (p. 1358-1522)

Read the previous post here.

After a brief diversion with the Midnight Crew and Felt, it's time to go back to the story proper.

Oh fucking yuck it's that other walkaround flash that uses the story sprites. This one has jank ass combat mechanics in addition to having the same clunky controls as the one in Act 2. Just like that one, this one is also a waste of time. There's no point traversing this and its big ass map.

Wait, is this a Shoop da Whoop reference? God I feel old.

And finally we see Jade's "patron black celebrity": Charles Dutton. Look, I have no clue what Hussie means by any of this. It's just a pattern that I've noticed and nobody else has talked about it before.

Unlike the other kids, Jade always has a somewhat repulsed look on her face whenever she sees her black celebrity. I think she might just be racist, which would explain why she's so xenophobic toward the trolls.

Okay, okay, I'm just joking. Look, Jade is in desperate need of some character traits. At this point, even a negative one would be preferable to nothing at all. Anything to give her modicum of depth.

I wonder what kinds of conversations Vriska or Gamzee would have with Jade. These are things we will never know!

Vriska in particular should've had some meaningful interactions with Jade considering she's the one responsible for her narcolepsy. I'm dumbfounded we never got to see her act more outwardly malicious and cruel toward Jade, or even take a more active role in fucking with her beyond simply putting her to sleep. Vriska isn't exactly known for her subtlety, after all. If she really wanted to put her name on the kids' session and be responsible for all the key events in it, she should've went whole hog.

Perhaps if Hussie had actually planned all this out from the onset, we could've gotten something with more payoff. Recall my earlier post when I said Jade had the makings of a twist villain in these early stages of the story? I'd like to alter and expand upon that with this scenario that I would've implemented in Hussie's place.

Picture this: what if the reason Jade is such a shallow character is due to no fault of her own? What if Vriska had been the one manipulating this human like a meat puppet as her means to infiltrate the kids' session? Pushing the kids to play Sburb in the first place? Her reluctance to give away useful information? All of her intents and motives being masked with overbearing cheerfulness? The fact that she needs "reminders" to keep track of her litany of superficial interests? All Vriska, baby. She has hijacked this kid's brain and is using her as a vehicle to drive the plot forward.

This is back from Act 3, but let's look at how Jade initially reacts to each of her friends and then filter this through Vriska's perspective. John's utter incompetence and Dave's crush on Jade would make them useful idiots in Vriska's scheme. So naturally she reacts positively to both of them.

But she perceives Rose with a single, terse sentence. Rose is the only one who is actively curious about Jade's knowledge of things she shouldn't reasonably know about. This makes her a threat. Vriska would have to put a lot of distance between them in order to keep Rose from uncovering the truth.

And then there are the other trolls. Unbeknownst to them, their efforts to stop Jade would've actually been an internal struggle against one of their own. Vriska would shut them out entirely, not wanting to risk getting them involved with this. All the while, the "real" Jade never gets a chance to express herself because she has been constantly suppressed by an outside agent. Her shallowness would be by design, rather than a consequence of poor writing.

... But I think I'm getting carried away with this tangent. At this point I'm talking about an entirely different comic when this is supposed to be focused on Homestuck. Let's just move on.

So Jade knew about Sburb the whole time, okay. I don't know why it was presented like she didn't at first, but fine whatever. She still continues to be smarmy and coy while John continues to have rocks for brains. Every conversation between these two gives me new insights to the amount of bullshit I'm willing to endure to finish this comic.

I love this line from Dave. Can I get a so true oomfie?

Jade fumbles the SBaHJ reference when someone like Rose could probably recite the entirety of SBaHJ verbatim. In fact, if Rose had fudged up a quote like that, Dave would've shown her no mercy. He holds Jade's hand through it, though, because he's a dumb teenage boy thinking with his dick.

"i got served like a dude on butler island" is a great line. Also, Jade is dismissing Dave getting beat up by Bro as "drama" which, if we're meant to take Dave's domestic situation as legitimate abuse and not a joke, is pretty fucked up.

Dave repeating the whole meteor bit is shut down swiftly because Jade is incapable of keeping up with his patter. Not that I wanted the joke to be repeated anyway, but it's a telling example of how their dynamic works.

Even though Jade and John pesterlogs might be the worst combination out there, Jade and Dave conversations are also pretty damn bad. Dave is normally an entertaining character, but he's squandered in these instances. Jade offers no fun chemistry with him in the same way Rose, or even John sometimes, does. Instead of bouncing his jokes and sarcasm back at him, her obliviousness and naivete causes them to fall flat. She's less a springboard and more of a foam mattress (or smuppet ass, to use a more appropriate metaphor).

And since Dave has a crush on her and wants to appease, he rolls with it and moves along to the next subject without comment. It's like a painfully embarrassing comedy routine where one partner is letting the other flounder on stage.

The trolls act as if certain behaviors like laughing and sarcasm are exclusive to humans, despite us later seeing that such things are normal in their society. It's such a silly bit and I do like it a lot.

Karkat's trolling scheme really is the dumbest plan ever. Also some unfortunate foreshadowing for when he does eventually make shitty diagrams later on.

We needed more moments with the Exiles hanging out and getting to know each other, instead of being pawns to fulfill stupid plot contrivances. It'd make this side-plot infinitely more enjoyable to read.

Note how it's nighttime here when the previous panels with the Exiles were all during the day. This means they must have spent several off-screen hours together by this point. What were they talking about to reach a point where they're all chill with each other? Eh, Hussie deems it unimportant, so we move on!

This is actually a funny moment where Dave allows himself to be a bit of a jerk. I guess even his patience with Jade is wearing thin at this point.

Oh? Rose sounds a little jealous it seems. Dave and Jade get to have a relatively stress-free time playing server and client together. But Rose didn't get to have any of that quality time with Dave because he didn't install his disc until it reached a point where they had only seconds to save her life.

I'm once again thinking about how nice it would've been if Dave had connected to Rose earlier and we could've gotten a lot of banter between them as they navigated the game. Instead we get a lot of toothless slop with Dave and Jade. We were robbed.

Oh shit and Dave snipes right back. He has been getting ignored a lot by both Rose and John, so it's easy to see why he's frustrated. He's mad that Rose isn't putting him as her first priority? God, get a room already.

The last time we saw a conversation between John and Dave was 1,108 pages ago, back in Act 2. John has been ignoring Dave's messages since then. I don't buy the friendship these two supposedly share. If anything, it's extremely one-sided on Dave's end.

This series of pages where PM takes control of the console shows us all the key stuff from the walkaround. This makes it even more unnecessary to actually play it.

This love triangle between the Exiles gets no further attention beyond this moment. Personally I'd have solved it by making all three of them form a polycule, but unfortunately I'm not the one writing this story.

You know, I never gave it much thought before, but why is Grandpa Harley suddenly alive? He doesn't have a dreamself or anything. Nobody revived his corpse. He's just inexplicably wandering the Medium now. If this is ever explained later, I don't remember it.

I know this isn't Mom Lalonde saying this but man... I think it would've had more of an impact if she did say it. Rose never gets to see her mother again, so all she's really left with is this sobering moment of insight that, wherever it is Mom sailed off to, she's doing it for her benefit. That perhaps she's not the cold-hearted, drunken shrew Rose thought she was for her whole life and instead, was just a heavily troubled woman trying her best to be a parent. You never truly know the kind of people your parents are until it's too late, I guess.

None of the kids ever get any closure with their guardians and that's a shame. We never get to view things from their perspectives and they're just glorified NPCs. Bro in particular definitely needed some insight into his inscrutable mind, but Mom also continues to fascinate me. This woman is so full of mystique and contradictions, yet all we ever see of her is fragmented shots from Rose's (heavily biased) point of view.

I wonder what exactly Mom thinks is "best for her child," though. Helping her win the game, surely. She had to have been planning for this moment for most of her life, having known about the countdown in the lab. I wonder if she knew the full extent of what Sburb was going to do, where to go once she got there, and how to help the kids win the game.

Anyway, this panel is definitely a top 10 Rose moment. Or perhaps a top 10 general Homestuck moment, since it has to do with both Rose and Mom. I should be keeping track every time I say this line.

It's very cute how AR contributes to WV's model city. "Begrudgingly" oh come on dude, we all know you're loving this.

These imps must be weak as shit if they're getting bodied by a teenage girl with a pair of blunt knitting needles.

These are some awkward steps transitioning back into the main story, but I remember liking Act 4 the most out of these early Acts. It always stuck out in my mind as what "peak Homestuck" really is, so I can only hope things will get better as we move along. I will say that if we're devoting as much time to Dave and Jade fucking around with the Sburb mechanics as we did with John and Rose, we're in trouble.

Read the next post here.

#homestuck #homestuck reread #john egbert #jade harley #vriska serket #dave strider #karkat vantas #rose lalonde #daverose #mom lalonde #grandpa harley #wayward vagabond #aimless renegade #peregrine mendicant #wvpmar

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