#ws ruining his life even in his final moments cool

[asexual-levia-tan]

hmm. wait is the white star the first person cale has personally killed face to face

[robinrequiems]

That cliché where it's like "the right person was in front of me the whole time"? (I've forgotten like every other cliché I know 😅)

OO wait I HQVE AN IDEA FOR RNIS 1

• jon has dated so many people, he’s a sap, okay? he loves love. he’s dating those in the hero community and those out of it, even tried people from the future.

• but each have left him feeling lost and heartbroken, so he broke up with them

• damian on the other hand, has had to watch this all go down. he’s known about his feelings for jon for a while, he finally accepted thay he fell in love with Jon when jon went off and skipped away to the future.

“I can’t believe you’re leaving me!”

“I can’t believe you’re not happy for me! This isn’t about you, Damian! It’s about me.”

“You said that you would never leave. That we’re best friend, yet here you are, leaving.”

“I’ll be back.”

“Sure.”

• damian went to the send off party for J to go to the future, but stuck to the shadows and didn’t talk, he didn’t like the feeling in his chest

• when jon came back. It was irma this, irma that

• then jon left again

• then jon was back, no more Irma

• damian was always there to pick up the pieces that jons exes broke, maybe he’s a sadist, but during these moments, he can pretend that maybe he would go and date jon, asking him our, and etc. he can pretend that he’d be the next one.

• at least for a moment anyways

• jon and Damian were best friends, damian cannot ruin that

• damian tried to move on, to get rid of it, but it didn’t work and Damian did not want to lead people on, so he just silently pined

• well not so silently to his other friends

Damian: This is- so unfair! *shove spoonful of icecream into his mouth*

Maya: i know, it’s really unfair

Colin: it’ll get better

Damian: nO MY LIFE IS FALLING APART BECWUSE OF A STUPID FARM BOY WITH BLUE EYES

• look the level of dramatic-ness of Damian has only gone up as he grew older

• bruce blames dick jason and stephanie for this

• but here damian was sitting with his friend, watching a shitty movie

• jon— jon didn’t realize how nice looking damian was, okay? ..a lie. loook jon didn’t think the way he felt about Damian was romantic, ok?? until it was. when Kathy told him. when they were dating.

• jon thought all friends held hands and kissed heads ( “some do, jon, but you- you do it differently” )

• but jon ignored her, but as jon held damian right now.. and how Damian was close to just falling asleep, it all hit him. he liked damian.

“Hey, Damian?”

“Mhhh?”

“I like you— TO MOVE IN WITH ME. Id like to be roommates with you!”

“Huh”

“Come on, it would be so fun!”

“Okay?”

• damian was half asleep and had no idea what was going on He had no idea why he said yes either

• but he did. Damian felt himself wake up when just said he liked him, but jon clearly fumbled on words there

• jon tripped and fell.

• and after months of being roommates jon realized something

• he’s in love with damian

“Kathy— thank god you picked up - I’m - im - I love with him. It’s always been him. This..”

“You finally realized??”

“Yes!”

“Go and tell him, I’m trying to sleep, dummy.”

“But what if he isn’t interested?”

“You don’t know til you try

• and jon did try

“Damian?”

“Mm?”

“I realized something today.”

“Okay?”

“It’s always been you. Ever since we were kids. You were always the first choice, but I didn’t realize that til now.”

“Cut to the chase, J.”

“I’m in love with you.”

“Fucking finally.”

• jon ws embarqss e to know that Damian had been in lvoe with him for years, but they are together now, so that’s cool

• it’s always going to be Damian and it always will be. Jon just didn’t realize that til now, but he’s happy hw did

• which is great, no more sad pining damian

[confused-bi-queer]

My journey, I was never straight, just in love with a guy

I feel safe, so I will write this, just because. Nobody is gonna read this anyway

I’m angry because it took me 18 years to freaking know that I’m not straight and there were several things that were obvious and I wish I would’ve notice them. So, here I go. I’m a her at this moment, keep that in mind.

When I was like 6 or so, I pretended to be a boy, for myself. It always made me curious.

When I was like 8 or 9 I never had a problem in dancing with another girl, I was always one of the tall ones and sometimes boys weren’t enough, so they put me with a girl friend and I liked to pretend I was a boy.

When I was like 10, I realized that my height never bothered me, just the fact that I was a tall girl and boys at that age were really really short.

When I was 11, or 12, I went to a catholic school dressed as a man. This was funny and cool. They told us to go in a costume and I went with a suit and a tie, and the director gave me a bad look, but I FELT SAFE. I liked my “costume”.

At that age, I wore a boxer for the first time and enjoyed the fact that I had men’s clothes, I hate them tho, they are uncomfortable.

When I was like 13, I almost kissed my girl best friend, by accident, and I didn’t care, but the fact that there were like 4 other people watching us, made me nervous.

When I was 14, I joked a lot about kissing a friend and spent over a WEEK figuring out which girl had the most desirable lips and who I would kiss if I could, the funny thing is that I had a boyfriend.

At that same time, I had a best friend, another girl, and we always joked about being girlfriends and we always planned, as a joke, to break up with our boyfriends and be together. I broke up with him like 4 months later, but for other reasons.

In those moments I noticed that it wouldn’t bother me if I ever had a girlfriend, to experiment right? (Crowley, the lies I told myself)

When I was 16, one morning I woke up and chose not to give a fuck and dressed up like the boys at my school: with long shorts, a hoddie, my socks high and like that and I felt nice, but my sibling was like “you’re gonna go like that” and changed.

By the end of 2019, my family knew that I liked dressing like a guy sometimes and my mom told me in public, “Why don’t you come like a man, you know, with your tie and suit?” and I loved the idea, but the people around us laughed and I just told her I’ll pass.

I went shopping with my family, to buy clothes, and I was feeling shy because I wanted to buy boy shirts, but I didn’t want anyone to look at me. I told my dad this, and he said it was fine and bought me 3 shirts, I felt soooo good, because I sometimes feel safer in those clothes.

NOW, from here was the real mess, when I noticed that this was not someone straight would do. In the middle of 2020, I was playing a game, A GAME, this episode thingy and chose a girl, because what the hell, I thought it would be fun and it was, and I’m in the middle of a dance class and said out loud for me: “well, this is way more exciting that with a dude” and everything just screwed up from here. Because when I heard myself I was like, what did I just say, and I spent the rest of the class thinking about that.

When the class finished, I thought more and realized that I might not be that straight after all. I questioned if I ever liked men or just my ex, because I’ve been in love with that guy sfor years, I don’t anymore, but I was into him from 5 years until I was 16 years, and that’s why I never knew anything about myself. After that, I made counts and I do like men, but girls too????? And FUCKING GOOGLED IT. Because I labelled myself immediately as a bi girl. And one test was like: “Well, if you’re here asking if you are straight, you’re not” and that sticked with me.

After that, I did some research and went back in my life and labelled myself again. Here’s the thing, I don’t like thinking about sex with men, I haven’t, and that thought made me anxious and disgusted, no offense men, and considered being an ace bisexual, like being attracted to both genders, but no sex. Buuuut, I found out about this term “demisexual” and fits me. But the problem was now the girls and it’s taking me some time to still discover at what point I’m attracted to them, but I am. At this moment I’m definitely bi, demisexual for the boys and confused with girls.

I have came out to three people, and whoever sees this, but doesn’t know who I am. The first person was a friend of mine, bisexual, and she was hella excited for me, so I feel safe with her. The second one was my sister, I tried, and boy did I regret it; she spent over half hour saying that I was confused and that only because a boy broke my heart I couldn’t hate men and that how would I ever be sure (because I didn’t tell her I was sure) and sometimes I say that a girl is pretty or things like that, but never to make her remember I came out. The last one is my best friend, we were on zoom and I sent her a text, didn’t talk about that, but sometimes I feel connected to her.

I cut my hair to my chin. And that felt NICE, I love my short hair, but I couldn’t cut it shorter, like a guy, because I dance and I need at least some hair to make a pony tail, at least. But once I’m out, I will cut it.

Once I was sure of me being bi and solved this thing that didn’t take me that long, just like 6 months, and I was finally happy and proud and I knew myself more, like I found myself, at the end of 2020 I started hating my clothes and my long hair. Because my hair is growing up so fucking fast.

On december 2020, I felt uncomfortable in my own skin, I sometimes am, and decided that when 2021 ends, I’ll know if I felt like that because I want to change the aesthetic of my clothes. I thought it was just that, I think it still is.

At the end of February and beginning of March of this year, I read Carry on and Wayward son, by Rainbow Rowell, and loved them, although I’m broken and not mentally stable anymore, but I loved them, I found my comfortable characters, Snowbaz, and I feel connected to them, because they have been an inspiration for a novel I’m writing, they have change me, and they are kinda ruining me, because I thought I wanted to become a director, but turns out I want to go to UK and study fucking literature (a plan I thought didn’t exist anymore, it does, AGAIN). Well, thanks to Baz in WS, I found my aesthetic: flower shirts. And actually flowers have always been my thing, but not once I have wore them because my mom always said they were too much. That’s why I don’t know if my gender identity is crap, because I never had a place to dress like I wanted: using men’s clothes.

Thanks to Baz and his amazing shirts, one day, like last week, I dressed as himself, with the things I had, and I could because I had the clothes, but too girly. After that, it came to me a question, that it’s been messing with me. “Do I want to look like Baz, or do I want to be Baz?” And that’s why I’m having a problem with my pronouns, mind, identity, fucking clothes and everything. A fictional character just messed with me!

I saw this person in tiktok that was gender fluid and I kinda identified with them, because some times I feel masc and sometimes girly and some times I want to cry because no one in my family understand this and I’m the closeted gender confused sibling, child, cousin. So, I think that maybe I am gender fluid or just mentally ill. Crowley,I need to go to therapy.

So, I have stated that I want floral shirts, no matter what, I do, I am a floral person, but people just don’t want other people to be be themselves with their clothes. Yesterday, I went for an ice cream with my sister and told her this, that I wanted and AM a floral person and pointed at her floral shirts and blew my mind, I WANTED THEM and she responded with a “those are boys clothes”, and I told her “so? what about that?” and changed the topic. 

Basically, my problems are around the way I dress, the pandemic that has taken a complete year of my life and I want to fucking live, and the fact that I want to go to another country to study a career I discarded because I had a class like that in high school and broke me, and it is not cheap, I’m not good at it and my parents didn’t even like the idea of me living in another state my own country aaand it is too late for me to send an application for next semester.

Back to my original point, I never ever questioned anything of myself and my behaviours because I was in love with the same guy all my life and dated him for a long shit of time, so I thought because I liked him, I was a girl loving a guy, but after several years of having broken up with him, I am a someone bi, because I don’t know. I don’t, but spoiler alert... I am not straight, at all.

[xxxdragonfucker69xxx]

wizoner's dilemma

a high fantasy epic fantasy game that uses dice pools, about magicians on floating islands as seen through Abrahamic mythology

-robotvance

-Jonathan Dragonfucker

Generally, Nabushezibanni found that the most embarrassing part of being a sorcerer in Babylon was asking the local demons to serve him as familiars. In Eastern Anatolia, such creatures had acquiesced instantly, eager to gain any foothold in his soul. In Babylon, however, he constantly felt as if they rather looked down on him–that taking the time to corrupt Nabushezibanni would simply upset their rather full social calendars.

-Michael Kay, The Hanging Gardens

-Jenna Moran, Nobilis

The world was a world, once. There were mountains and cities and gardens and potholes in roads. They’re gone, now, because of people like you.

You are a magician: an heir to unimaginable power. You live in your own world: some island, some remnant of the world that was, some bastion against the sea of chaos in which you now float. Maybe you are the last living person you know. Maybe you live in a charming town, the heads of the mannequin-villagers concave masks when seen from behind. Maybe, against all odds, you manage to share the world with another magician.

Not likely, though.

Likelier that you spend your time plotting and scheming. The world is harsh and hostile – literally, yes, because of Chaos at your doorstep and demons beyond the walls – but also in the way that all worlds have ever been hostile, in that the time between meeting someone and being stabbed in the back is measured in days or hours. In that the only defense against betrayal is to betray first.

This is why the world ended.

There are some schools of magic: Sorcery, Enchantment, Evocation, Conjuration. Divide 7 points among them.

Sorcery is concerned with Fate, with fortune, luck, destiny, doom. Sorcerous rituals often involve traditional methods of divination, which include any random element (palm nuts, yarrow sticks, the entrails of a goat). Use Sorcery to

Prophesy a particular death or misfortune

Curse someone with bad luck

Foresee the bad things that will happen to you

Divine the intentions or location of another

Query the cosmos about a mystery.

Enchantment is about minds and hearts and souls and dreams. It is often expressed through song and art. Use Enchantment to

Enthrall someone into your service (another magician will contest with their own magic)

Hypnotize someone to sleep, and walk through their dreams

Infect a whole population with an emotion or attitude

See someone’s memories, and change them if you want.

Evocation is the art of creation, of calling forth the world from nothing, of shaping Chaos. Spells of evocation are flashy and dramatic, full of sound and fury. Use Evocation to

Create an extension of your world, increasing its area or otherwise adding to its landscape

Form a catastrophe, anything from a living earthquake to a storm of fire and glass, and set it upon another

Build a whole new world from Chaos

Shake the foundations of the universe.

Conjuration is the way of binding spirits: the shades of the dead, the memories of angels, or most often demons from Chaos. Set the correct altar, make the correct sacrifice, and invoke the correct names. Use Conjuration to

Summon the ghost of someone particular, and question them

Call up an army: of zombies, monsters, or worse

Create and bind a specific demon for your specific needs

Subvert the binding upon another spirit, freeing it or binding it to your own will

Bind a demon or angel to serve at a specific task, not to be freed until that task is finished (never, if it’s something like ‘guard my island’ or ‘hold up my bridge’).

You own a world. Describe it. Is it very like the memories of the world before the war? Does it have life in it? Does it have people, or things that act like people, in it? Does the sun rise and set? Have you remade the moon? Is it perhaps five days wide, no matter how fast you travel? Is it perhaps unbearably deep, atop ruins of civilizations that never existed? You may later, if you choose, amend this world by magic, so don’t sweat it too badly.

The default unit of time is a season, even though the actual length of a season can vary wildly from world to world. Play proceeds in turns, visiting each player a couple of times over the course of a season as they describe assembling their new magic or otherwise preparing for the final ritual. Over the course of that season you come up with a new working and unleash it on the universe, on your own world or on another. If you suspect that another magician intends to attack your own, you can set up a defense that will take place just before the threat arrives: if you have provoked a master of Evocation and fear her wrath, you can build an army of enormous statues to hold back the flood she is sure to send. If you successfully attack another magician, you gain and they lose a point of mana: equal parts mystic potence and social status. If you know that you cannot resist another magician, you may spend a point of mana to bolster your defenses with another school: inhabit those statues with bound demons to add your Evocation and Conjuration together. You still lose mana this way, but at least the attacker won’t gain any unless they manage to still overpower you somehow. If they still manage to, you can build on the previous season’s defenses with your next working.

Not every working has to be in preparation for war, of course. You can simply try to build your own paradise. But every such working is a wasted opportunity to fight for mana, and if you build too beautiful a world someone else will simply kill you and take it.

Every year, all the magicians remaining journey to the Tower of the Sun where Martael binds them to neutrality, and they partake in the Years Feast. No magic may be performed at this time, on pain of annihilation or censure. During this time the magicians bicker, gossip, and preen. They make alliances and they make enemies, but it has been a long time since anyone was foolish enough to try making friends. Those with the most mana are granted the highest social status, and those with the least may be forced to sit near the servants (though they still bask in untold luxuries). Magicians are capable of bending the world to their whim, and little can touch them; for many, humiliation at the Years Feast is the worst injury imaginable.

[SIDEBAR: Teamwork Makes the Dream Work]

No, it doesn’t.

How can a group of PCs play this in a cooperative mode? What is the goal of this game, the best possible outcome? Let me be clear: there is none. This is a game about people at their pettiest, not their best and not even their worst. Play will continue until you get fed up with yourselves and each other. Nothing good will come of this.

But if you really want the PCs to play nice together, there are some options. First is that you can live in a shared world: pillars of the four elements at the poles of the world, or some other such element. In such a scenario all the PCs are required for the wellbeing of that world, and will not destroy each other; they may even pretend to like each other. Second is that some other, more powerful magician has arisen in a far land, a star in the west. This new power threatens to destroy them all if they do not cooperate. If you want, it doesn’t even have to be a magician; it can simply be an unspeakably powerful demon, named by some foolish amateur and free to destroy all ordered things.

But by default? This game doesn’t mean anything. It will not help express any emotions. It is simply an avenue for some friends to come up with cool curses and dumb shit to do to each other, and do those things.

[SIDEBAR: This Isn’t Artsy Enough]

If you want, you can even decide that the theme of this game – the pettiness and pointlessness of human spite – is dumb and uninteresting and you want to invert it. Maybe you actually live in the last normal remnants of Earth, and you are trying furiously to hold the Chaos and the demons and the evil magicians at bay.

Maybe you want this game to give you emotions.

If that’s so, I’ll add another rule. Well, not a rule, because you don’t have to follow it. Another option.

Usually, when attention comes to a magician during the course of a season, that magician is getting ready to do magic. They are memorizing the myriad names of the dead, or negotiating with the devil, or rearranging the stars in auspicious patterns. But, if you want to be nice about it, you can be doing something else instead. Rather than being a magician, you can be a human being.

Walk down the docks, and don’t even go dressed as a magician; go as an old man, and talk to the fruit-sellers heart-to-heart. Sit on a hill and look at the sky. Take tea with your friends. Revel in beauty. Rejoice in what you have made; be glad, for it is good.

If someone emotes a moment that is so touching, so true, that it grabs everyone; or if, at the Years Feast, you think back to a moment that has managed to stay with you; if someone gives you emotions, like, really good? They can have an extra point of mana. They squeezed it from the world, they grasped the imperishable flame that makes things good and real and holy. What’s left of it, anyways. In such a mode, life is no longer a zero-sum game. You can get better. You can make the world bigger. You can make the world whole again.

as i have remarked this is basically the perfect opposite of a witchs ladder game, i got to the end and it was actually paining me that there ws no avenue for emotional expression

my first robotvance game, im so proud of my beautiful child

i got really jenna moran near the end due to reading a bunch of chuubos for chuubos marvelous wizardry engine

im actually quite happy with how this turned out, it needs firming up but i think its a good first draft

please let me know if you think of an actual good name for this

[thedegenerateasexual]

top 10 teen wolf episodes as rated by me i guess

IN the order from most to least favorite, and i did not include any 6B ones because it isn’t fair for me to use those when the season isn’t finished yet. (EDIT: season is now finished and while none of the 6B episodes made the ranking i did adjust the honorable mentions accordingly.) this is long & i had fun making it

3.19 Letharia Vulpina: ok ok so just like Everyone Knew I Would i did pick this one because of all the prime derek/chris material—that all-important moment where they had their claws and gun trained on each other, being handcuffed to a bench together, derek saving chris’s life despite insisting he wasn’t gonna—BUT there’s literally not a single second of this episode i don’t love. we open with deaton being a total badass and scaring the shit out of some yakuza dudes, then KIRA gets to be a badass, and then there’s a small scott/allison/isaac moment when he’s all laid up (which was my ot3 for a little while in 3A…don’t judge), allison gets to threaten peter with a stun baton on her girlfriend lydia’s behalf, and that doesn’t even BEGIN to get into the absolute delight it is to watch everyone running around trying to deal with all the chaos the notgitsune is causing (we even got to see coach get shot, which was actually pretty funny??). between all of that and the plot twist at the end (that we all saw coming…but hey) that it was really the nogitsune pretending to be stiles all along (and the very…gay…thing going on with him and scott), it’s literally like, the perfect episode. there was even a rain battle at the end i fucking love rainy scenes. PEAK television.

4.12 Smoke & Mirrors: my two favorite characters on the dumb werewolf show are derek hale & scott mccall and this episode is like a great big flashing sign that says “LOOK AT HOW AWESOME DEREK IS AND LOOK AT HOW AWESOME SCOTT IS!!!” because scott finally gets to KICK PETER’S ASS and comes back from something he shouldn’t be able to come back from because he’s SCOTT MCCALL, TRUE ALPHA, and how can we forget my son derek finally achieving the full shift and giving that big old “FUCK YOU” to kate argent. if that wasn’t enough, my third favorite character chris argent gets the second-closest he’s ever come to weeping in this entire series when confronting the sister he can’t kill at the end. also kate is in this episode and she’s the best villain i love her presence onscreen. also peak television.

1.12 Code-Breaker: i love s1 SO FUCKING MUCH bc it was so tightly plotted - it’s like back to the future and holes, it’s one of those things where every line serves a purpose and there’s no spare bits, and tw’s plot becomes such a mess later that it’s honestly really amazing. so code breaker is my favorite one because all the plot stuff comes together really well, and it’s just like well-done overall, there’s that sick backwards shot of allison, chris’s Angst when he realizes his sister is a serial killer, scott trying Really Really Hard and derek being Really Really Done (why don’t they have more scenes together…), stiles and peter cracking me up with the laptop password gag, like…there’s literally no part of this ep that isn’t a delight (also again kate is in it i love kate as a villain). it’s wonderful 10/10

3.14 More Bad Than Good: i had a real hard time with this one vs. the one immediately before it, the first one of 3B, but i love both bc i love watching scott stiles and allison absolutely losing their shit. in the end i like this one better bc 1. you get to watch them beat it and 2. they finally find and rescue malia and i FUCKING LOVE malia, my own daughter, also the scene where she reunites with her dad makes me misty every time. bonus content: watching araya hack off peter’s finger :D :D :D AND this is the first time derek gets to make heart-eyes at braeden. i’m so happy whenever he’s happy!!! 

6.05 Radio Silence: this episode is everything i love about 6A all wrapped up in a nice neat lil package. i love 6A bc it totally fucking surprised me by making me like things i did not think i’d like, the biggest being stiles/lydia. and like…this season fuckin SOLD me on it, the way she fights tooth and nail to get him back and the way he’s so patiently waited for her reminds me 2much of claire & ben from @cambionverse and the beginning of me being sold was this ep, when they had the wall between them, and when they finally talked on the radio. and this episode even made peter hale interesting for 30 entire seconds which i thought was impossible—it was cool that he did One Genuinely Selfless Thing by going through the portal to save malia, and later when malia and scott had to take his pain to get at stiles’ keys you could almost imagine for a second he got to pretend someone actually DID care about him, that’s his reward for doing a single selfless thing. it was also stellar to see stiles (and the jeep!!!) again and see him working the problem from the other side it was like getting real sam back after half a season of soulless sam in spn s6 DO NOT call me out for referencing this show

4.05 I.E.D.: go look at these gifsets and read the tags. now come back. …okay okay aside from, That, which i won’t repeat as to avoid two paragraphs of capslock, derek also smiles in this episode. even scott is alarmed by it. HE’S HAPPY i’m happy he’s happy!!!!! i’m happy he loves scott!! i’m happy he spends half the episode trading long lingering looks with his future boyfriend!!!! but if that wasn’t enough this episode KEEPS ON GIVING because at the very end the calaveras show up and bully chris into saying the original code, and forgetting his daughter’s, which is deeply relevant to all my headcanons about the code lowkey being like indoctrination (watch that shit again it’s fucking wild…), and also it’s one of the only times in the series where he looks genuinely freaked out and i love watching his Turmoil™

6.10 Riders on the Storm: this is also everything i love about 6A in one ep, just like, less concentrated, bc there’s also the nazi werewolf (tho even PETER HALE getting judgy @ the nazi was truly a highlight). its got all the Big Damn Reunions, its got STYDIA, its got peter actually being slightly interesting, its got scott mccall: badass. its actually also got lydia martin: badass, which like…About Damn Time. it’s even got chris argent: badass, and it’s also got chris argent: badass smooching on a beautiful lady w/ his hands in her hair!!!! (her: that was so hot! me: GIRL ME TOO) also they thought this was the last stiles ep ever so his goodbyes to everyone were like really sweet & made me emo af

3.22 De-Void: so obviously i love this one because derek’s line when he was under thrall about “you’re NOT my ally you’re a HUNTER” got me into the dumb rarepair i wrote like 60k for so far but also i do genuinely deeply love the sequence where they exorcise the notgitsune from inside stiles’ head—lydia facing her fears in the ruined prom dress is such amazing imagery + im gay for the scott/stiles reunion. bonus content includes chris & allison interaction which breaks my heart (he’s so proud of her!!) and the tense kickass scene in the loft in the opening where the notgitsune (SCARY MOTHERFUCKER) is trying to goad chris into shooting it. i don’t love ALL of this ep bc it has so much thumb twins (& from here down there are no more perfect ones…sad) but i love MOST of it and the parts i do love are fantastic. so. i’ll deal w/ thumb twins

3.06 Motel California: look i know this episode should disturb the fuck out of me bc 1. derek and jennifer bang & in my eyes that isn’t a consensual encounter and 2. all the creepy ass suicides but like…honestly there is something so soothing about motels to me, i’ll put this one on to just chill out anyday. like it is delightfully creepy and i love all the meat to everyone getting hit with their baggage (uh…except the thumb twins), but mostly it’s the #mood i love. i actually even like the derek scenes before the sex starts because he is So Wounded and So Sad (“everyone around me gets hurt” BYE) and they rarely let him actually emote at all so it’s very refreshing

2.03 Ice Pick: this was like…such a perfect & amazing introduction to the new betas like if the new ppl in s4 and beyond had gotten this kind of good introduction (and hadn’t been killed off so quickly…) i would love them about 10x more. it’s got that nice s2 vibe that most ppl are into and i still love erica & boyd w/ all my heart!!! (DONT really love how creepy derek was w/ erica but we’ll blame it on being the alpha.) i also love how fucked up the scene with allison tied to the chair was & the fucking fight between derek’s pack and scott at the end…like scott gets to win a 2-on-1 fight and then derek gets to be mr. cool alpha dude and kick his ass. i LOVE THOSE FIGHT SCENES and bc of this episode “iron” is my derek theme song. so.

HONORABLE MENTIONS aka these were on the original list but didn’t make the cut:

1.11 Formality (aaalllll of derek’s ugly backstory this was when i knew i loved him)

2.10 Fury (the first ep i ever watched live, will always be fond of it for that reason even tho i don’t give 2 shits about matt)

2.11 Battlefield (the theme of doing things bc of the power of love will always get me, it was also the only teen wolf episode i ever made gifs of, back when i knew how to make gifs)

3.12 Lunar Ellipse (for scott becoming a true alpha for REAL + derek’s big ol’ well-deserved fuck-you to jennifer, i didn’t love 3A but this was such prime derek & scott material)

3.13 Anchors (like i said: watching stiles, scott, and allison all COMPLETELY lose their shit, also did you know the anchor allison chose in this ep ws her new code? Interesting)

3.24 The Divine Move (listen...you can laugh at the cheesy sfx ALL you want but when i watched kate argent come back from the dead to menace derek hale like his own worst nightmare come to life LIVE with mine own two eyes i jumped out of my seat and YELLED like everything about that moment was absolutely PERFECT and very few things are ever gonna top it)

4.08 Time of Death (derek learning to use a gun and then getting it on with braeden…bye)

4.11 A Promise to the Dead (not only chris unsticking himself from the wall for allison and scott’s sake but also derek and braeden walking around his loft half-naked in the rain...nice)

5.05 A Novel Approach (the stiles and donovan altercation…the first 15m where he acts with his face without saying a word…enough said)

5.18 The Maid of Gévaudan (i'm bitter about the flashback because i want ALLISON but it was a nice origin story + scott fighting the beast all on his own to save that library full of kids was one of the only truly amazing moments of 5B)

6.08 Blitzkrieg (the sheriff rebuilding stiles’ room and saying goodbye to claudia makes me really for real cry but there’s so much nazi bullshit that i couldn’t justify having the episode as a whole being one of my favs)

6.13 After Images (chris argent absolutely losing his shit the entire ep, fucking love it)

6.19 Broken Glass (derek hale's comeback and he got to spend all of his screentime with chris argent! i seriously considered poking this into the #10 spot but ultimately the sideplot i hated with malia and scott had so much more screentime i can't use it - i can't list an episode i'm always skipping parts of!)