#written to lady gaga's Just Dance

[animentality]

You guys wanna know why I didn't include Judas on my Lady Gaga most feral song poll?

Because I don't personally like that song and I made the poll.

Either live with it or suffer, but don't do it near me.

[itsonlydana]

"Can you meet me halfway (I'll meet you halfway)" | hobbit

pairing: Thranduil x fem!reader x Bard 👑 [king's special]

you went out clubbing on new years eve when a gorgeous rich couple hits on you and invites you back to their apartment to finish what you started right on the dancefloor

warnings/tags: NSWF! THIS IS ADULT CONTENT ✋️, modern!AU, threesome, oral sex (male & female), dirty talk, semi-public-sex, soft dom! bard and bratty dom!thranduil, protected sex, fingering, passing out during sex, slight overstimulation, age-gap (reader is of age, though its described that thranduil and bard are older), hairpulling, aftercare,

words: 13,8k

an: this is by far the dirtiest thing i've ever written and my god i'm not a smut writer; i get too flustered over my own writing lmao. Hopefully you can enjoy this out-of-character story even if it isn't new years anymore!

inspired by early 2000s club bangers like Kesha, Britney Spears, Black Eyed Peas (that's where the title came from) and Lady Gaga

+ masterlist + 

🌿 reposts and comments or anonymous messages in my inbox are very appreciated, they motivate me a lot and keep me writing <3

"What?!"

"I said," the barkeeper leaned closer and pushed a filled to the rim shotglass over the counter, "this one is from the pretty one to your right!"

With a myriad of people in this club who fit your definition of "pretty" you found yourself on the brink of shouting at the red-haired bartender once more.

This would mark the third attempt, given that the club's 2000s music was blaring to the extent that communication was damn near impossible if you weren't screaming or using your hands trying to get orders across the sticky, littered with neon glowstick wristbands counter.

Before you could ask her who the hell she'd meant, the bartender had turned away, leaving you to figure out the mystery man for yourself.

You lifted the shot glass to your nose and took a deep breath— pure tequila.

At least you would enjoy this one; the last few shots other men had sent over to you had been nothing but disgusting, ranging from vodka to Jägermeister and one you didn't even bother to drink.

The world spun a little when you turned your head over your shoulder and for a second the flashy lights blurred the people crowding the bar into one mass, unidentifiable and mushed together; then your eyes zeroed in on him and pretty didn't even begin to cover it.

Next to the bar, holding out his own shot glass in hands that could've fit three or five of them, stood a man that was intimidatingly gorgeous and decently tall even as he rested his hip cheekily against one of the chairs, elbow on the wooden top while he flicked his fingers against the rim of the glass.

Not even that he was just tall, and he was –surely taller than most of the men standing between you two –, but he had this quality about him that let him stand out of the crowd.

Maybe it was the hair, blonde like starlight and pulled into a long and messy ponytail, with just a few loose strands framing his strong jawline. Or maybe it was the smug look on his face, the smirk that tugged on his lips when you dragged your eyes over the see-through shirt that clung to his well... and oh so– so well-defined chest.

On any other occasion, you would have simply raised the glass and disappeared back into the crowd of dancing people, but tonight felt different.

New Year's Eve had that ring to it. The careless "Fuck it all, it's all going to shit anyway"-attitude.

Any newspaper or media marked today the last day of yet another frustrating, wonderful, soul-crushing, draining, exciting, and overall overwhelming year, full of things you regretted having done, and as you stared at the man meeting your gaze with a questioning arch of a dark eyebrow, you found yourself giving a flying fuck about whether you'll add another mark on that board.

There was a surge of power washing through your body as you toasted the glass in his direction before tipping it against your lips and letting the tequila rush into your mouth.

The alcohol went down burning, hot, and dry and left a warm trail down your throat into your stomach.

"I see you not only bear a resemblance to the devil, you drink like her as well," a sultry voice drawled, sufficiently loud for you to lift your head.

Somehow the man had managed to appear right next to you within seconds and got so close that you were confronted with a very exciting view of his chest.

You eyed it, naturally because who wouldn't take their time looking at the flexing pecs covered in silver glitter and sweat?

Slowly, you dragged your gaze upwards, only faltering for a moment at the sight of a pink tongue running over plush lips. You met his eyes again, this time with no more than half a meter separating you and you were glad your knees didn't buckle like they threatened to do.

"And what are you? Some angel that has fallen from heaven?" Your counter was weak, a bad example of what was usually some excellent flirting, if you dare say yourself, but it's all you could manage with those cerulean eyes staring down at you in interest.

He laughed, thank fucking god, and tilted his head to the side. "It must be fate that we met, is it not?"

"Buy me another drink and we'll see"

Somehow, it didn't surprise you that he simply raised his pointer finger and the server immediately rushed to prepare whatever order he'd signaled her.

"Unfair, I waited, like at least five minutes for some water," you complained, not really putting any real annoyance into it but pouting nonetheless for the effect.

It went a long way because the stranger stepped closer, up into the little bit of personal space one could have in an overcrowded club, and cooed, "What a shame. Who could ever pass such a lovely face and not serve you right away?"

"I don't know," you sighed and smiled at him sweeter than sugar, "I do know that we shouldn't let that tequila go to waste though"

"Then be a good girl and drink up"

Oh, yeah.

Suppose you hadn't already contemplated sleeping with him, that certainly solidified your decision.

This wasn't just fate, this must be compensation for all the shit you've been through this year, wrapped up nicely in 6 feet and more of dripping sex and sultry smiles.

Eyes locked, you both clinked the glasses together before throwing them back. You couldn't help it when your lashes flutter shut.

Once again, the tequila burned all the way down to your stomach, adding to the cocktail of drinks that lowered your inhibitions and made your core throb in excitement.

You would've asked him for salt and lemon if he hadn't looked so unbothered by the pure taste. His lips didn't twitch, while you're sure yours were pulled into a grimace.

"Thank you, Sir," the words left your mouth without a second thought.

Thinking, in general, started to become more of a theory than something you were willing to do tonight; much too exhausting if you could simply let your tongue run wild.

He rewarded you for that decision, for his eyes widened and he stepped even closer, now slotting one of those long legs - and fuck, was he really wearing leather pants? Who had access to your wet dreams?- between yours as he leaned down.

"I must say you caught my interest the moment I saw you on the dance floor," He placed a hand on the countertop, not touching you yet, though the invitation he gave you, the silent question for permission, spoke for itself.

The second move was on you to lure him in and you blinked up at him while you trailed your fingers over the arm, scratching hairless skin with the tip of your nails until it changed into the fishnet top and you placed the hand to rest on one strong shoulder. The red color of your nail polish made such a beautiful contrast to his fair skin that your mind conjured imagines of how they must look on other parts of him.

Surely, with the size of him…

Now that you initiated the contact, he drove forward with his second hand, and the large palm cupped your chin.

While the touch was hot in how it's delivered, so dominating, and fuck if that didn't send warm licks of pleasure down your spine, his hand itself was surprisingly cold.

The temperature in the club was almost unbearable, only manageable through refreshing drinks and a trip or two to the bathrooms, and the spikes of the cool touch fought the heat pooling in your body.

One of those silky locks of hair brushed your neckline, falling right into the cut out of your dress that his eyes shamelessly took in from his higher-up viewpoint.

You took a deep breath, maybe even pushed out your chest as he eyed it in the knowledge that the lace bra was showing through.

All you inhaled was the intoxicating smell of his cologne, vanilla (even though you suspected he is anything but...), and something sweet and without a doubt expensive.

You're addicted to it the moment it hit your nose and clouded your mind.

"Do you not believe that an appropriate thank you is in order?" he inquired; no, he demanded.

You decided to play dumb, not because you thought he's into that – on the contrary, he seemed the kind of man who admired eloquence and intellect rather than dullness – but because it's a game you both enjoyed playing.

There was intrigue in tip-toeing around what is most obvious (lust as well as the urge to rip each other's clothes off as soon as possible, maybe even a fuck in the bathrooms).

"I thought I already said thank you," you mused, pushing out your lower lip into a pout again, "and that lousy shot is hardly worth more than a few words. You can't expect something greater if there is nothing to thank for."

He raised a dark eyebrow – you wondered if he colored his hair or eyebrows – and the hand around your chin lifted your head to twist it right and left.

One smooth thumb brushed over the pout, and he clicked his tongue. "Now now, I would consider this greedy if you were not in the right. You poor thing must be exhausted after all the dancing"

His eyes flashed when yours widened; he really did notice you before, had watched you.

"Yes," he drawled as if he read your mind, and his lips curved into a smirk that flashed a row of perfect bright teeth, "I saw how you moved out there, how wanton you presented yourself. However, it did not escape my notice that you rebuffed anyone who dared to approach."

When you opened your mouth to say something, his finger swiped over your lip again. Without hesitation, you sucked on the fingertip, collecting a few drops of tequila that you made a show of swallowing.

The protest disappeared with it down your throat.

He was right, why deny it?

The way you danced was just an expression of how comfortable you felt in your own body, the rhythm provided by provocative music a tool to follow the movements.

Everything you did, you did for yourself, not for the men who attempted to touch you simply because they were captivated by the dancing. As if you would accept some clammy hands grabbing for you.

"Maybe it was wanton," you said after releasing his finger, but not without scratching your teeth over it.

His pupils dilated, his chest raised at a sudden inhale of air; he apparently underestimated you.

You nodded your head toward the dance floor, "maybe I came here to look for a good fuck, but it's my decision who I take and not theirs"

"As you should. Those boys who tried and failed miserably were amusing to watch. None of them were good enough for you, right, sweetheart?"

You hummed in agreement as well as disagreement. "I'm not searching for anyone good enough," you thought back to all the good-guys who had lured you in with promises of treasuring you only to become insufferable with their need to control in the end.

"Then what do you need?"

"I want someone bad," the tone in your voice was challenging, just like the stare you gave him. "I want someone who won't be afraid to break me"

There was a slight tug on your chin, his hand pulled you in slightly but any further without any movement from you, it would've cause a strain in your neck.

You craved it.

The blonde god, he must be, the thought became clearer with any passing second, a gift, a god, an angel, crushed his mouth against yours. There was a fleeting moment where you realized you didn't know his name, but then his other hand wrapped around your neck, and your teeth clashed, and you found yourself not caring one bit.

You're sure he wouldn't mind if you moaned "God" instead of his name. Maybe he would even get off to it.

Only one way to find out.

It turned out quite hard to manage saying anything at all, his kisses stole every last bit of oxygen, robbing you of the ability to string together words and turning you into a whimpering mess with his tongue and wandering hands.

He called you a devil yet here he was, corrupting you in a way that will ruin you for any other person.

"You taste divine," he sounded as breathless as you felt when you separated and dizziness cultivated in your lust-clouded head at the compliment rasped in that deep voice of his.

"Do not worry," he continued, smearing the string of spit that connected you over your plush lips, "If you allow me I will try my very best to break you"

Hell or heaven, wherever he was leading you right now, your need tripped over itself eagerly.

When was the last time you were this aroused? You felt yourself growing wetter and wetter, and that only through his words and kisses; the state he could push you into if he truly fucked you would be completely new territory, you realized.

A nod is all you could manage.

The last you saw on his face was a wide grin before he kissed you again, this time though, he moved on to your jaw and then your neck. You beared it to him by tilting your head, eyes falling on the ceiling where the neon lights hushed over black brick, coloring your sight while your face took on a flushed red.

The blond devil nipped and bit, sucked and scratched in a manner so animalistic you wouldn't have thought a surely unquestionably sophisticated man to be able to.

You whimpered again, and your hands rose to grab something, anything and you found that ponytail the most accessible. Your fingers twirled a few soft strands as you gasped when his teeth sunk into the delicate skin right where your neck and shoulder met, and the slight pain following wasn't unwelcome.

It made you feel alive.

You're close to pulling him away to the bathroom– an amused laugh to your side prevented that thought from festering any further.

"I'm away for one smoke and you just couldn' wait?"

Unable to think straight after the assault on your neck, it took a moment for you to come back to your senses that don't revolve around lips, kiss, bite, fuck, suck…

Your sight spun as you snapped your head back, nearly knocking your chin into the man still busy marking you up, unbothered that there was another man watching you and clearly waiting for an answer.

So you decided to do the only thing that must convince him to let go, and you pulled on his hair.

He growled, fucking growled, and his lips twisted, flashing his teeth again.

Your heart dropped into your wet panties until you found he wasn't pinning you to the floor with the hard stare but the new arrival.

"Did you not see that I was busy?" he snapped at the dark-haired man, and while you felt slightly scared he was going to rip his handsome head off, the man only sported an annoyed expression.

"Yes, exactly. If I remember correctly, we decided to wait until I get back?"

Decided, waited?

"You took too long"

The man threw his head back in a raspy laugh, "Incorrigible bastard. Will I have to sit you down with a toy to keep you busy while I'm away?"

The blonde turned back to you and smirked, "That will not be necessary as I am quite capable of finding my own toys"

"Hey!" you cut into the conversation, not amused that they talked as if you weren't right there, "I'm not a fucking toy!"

Both men turned to you now, towering over you in their height, and mustering you so intensely that you slightly squirmed under their gaze.

The man with salt and pepper hair chuckled. "I am so sorry, Darlin'. I hope Thranduil didn't play too hard?"

Considering that you still felt the scratch of his teeth on your neck and the wet spit he left there, you felt like some kind of chew toy one would throw their dog but nevertheless, you pushed your chin up high. "Nothing I can't take."

The blonde's, Thranduil's, hand on your waist pulled you into him possessively. "I told you there is some bite behind the pretty face," he smirked.

While it didn't escape you that this hinted to a previous conversation, a plan formed over you, it's the attractiveness of them that led you to turn a blind eye.

"Weren't you the one biting a minute ago?" The music made it hard to talk normally and you stood up on your tiptoes to yell the words, but all that it resulted in is a deep chuckle.

"Oh, I like you," the other man laughed as well.

You took him in, the tight pants that showed off strong thighs and the black and gold shirt with more buttons open than actually buttoned that presented muscles and hair leading down and oh–

"What a surprise," you said, looking up to meet his hungry eyes, "I find I like you too" You turned your head to Thranduil, who smirked and sent you a wink that had you blushing, "So how's this gonna work? I'm going to be blunt and say that five minutes ago I was convinced you and I were on the same page, what's with your friend?"

"Husband"

"Husband?!" you parroted, unconvinced yet when your eyes fell on their hands a gold ring flashed back at you from both fingers.

Heat curled in your body like molten lava at lustful and otherwise utterly inappropriate thoughts this provoked of these two married man having their way around your body.

Thranduil bowed his head lower again, playfully nipping at the part of your neck that surely was already bruising. "I have to admit that I promised Bard to wait for him to come back, though I found I could not follow through when I saw you approaching the bar."

You swallowed. Hard. Not that it helped your very dry throat.

Bard came closer, reclaiming your attention.

His face, more defined than Thranduil's, was adorned with a rugged layer of dark stubble, crow's feet framing his vivid green eyes when he smiled at you. He looked the picture of a soft soul, but you remembered that this couple was picking up a third partner on New Year's Eve, so you shouldn't judge a book by its cover.

There was some spice behind the old-armchair-and-book-vibes.

"Will that be a problem, Darlin'?" he asked in that ruff voice, posh and Welsh accent dripping over you.

A refreshment to hear that accent in this city, so enthralling in how it wrapped around you; especially that damn nickname. There was no way you would say no to him.. both of them if he called you Darling one more time.

You shook your head. "No. I think I'll just need a bit more liquid encouragement if I am to survive this night."

"Oh, what a shame," Thranduils lips left where they continued to suck and lap on your neck, peppering kisses, leaving bruises, and moved to your earlobe. His voice dropped as much into a whisper as the music allowed it, "I had my hopes on fucking you into heavenly spheres"

There went the last string of sanity holding you back.

Hearing a man who was seemingly hell-bent on avoiding abbreviations like "don't" and "can't" at all costs speak in such a filthy way was something you never knew you needed.

"I hope you can follow through with that," you trailed a hand over his smooth chest, collecting glitter on your way and smeared it over his throat where his adams apple bobbed, "because if you break that promise like you did the one with your husband, I will just have to let him finish the job"

Thranduil yanked you back into him, back into a kiss that seared itself into your memories and burned the touch, taste, and movement of his lips into every cell of your body.

It was almost aggressive how much teeth went into the kiss, how he bit down and all you could do was gasp and whimper.

Briefly, you thought of the poor people around you, because if all you wanted to do was get a drink and were confronted with one person devouring the other, you would be seething but right now you were being the one he kissed, whose sounds he swallowed and whose hands held you to him.

So fuck them.

With your senses heightened now that you wanted these men all over you, the sensation of Bard leaning in, hair tips tickling your neck as he licked Thranduil's throat, led you to pull away from the blonde. You watched as Bard sprinkled something flaky and white onto the spot wet with spit, and only when he lifted a shot glass the thought crystalized that he salted Thranduil for you.

"Come on," Thranduil's smirk taunted you just as much as his words, "What is another lousy shot? We even made it easy for you poor baby, after you could not take the first one easily"

Rolling your eyes at the mocking, you dove in to copy Bard. The salt sticking to his neck coated your tongue and you took longer than necessary to lick the skin free of it. The rush that this sent through you was exhilarating.

As soon as you were finished, your head got tilted backward firm and yet gently.

Rough fingertips cupped your neck and one thumb moved to press against your jaw, as you felt a solid chest in your back.

"Open wide, Darlin'," Bard ordered and encouraged you to follow him as his other thumb pushed between your teeth.

You obeyed, never once breaking eye contact with Thranduil and taking in his lust-blown pupils, as Bard poured the tequila into your mouth, directly down your throat. Then, while you pulled a grimace, shutting your eyes for a second, Bard turned you around, sandwiching you between them.

When you opened your eyes again, you saw the green slice of lemon between his teeth and following the wink he sent you; you knew exactly what was to come next.

Kissing Bard was very different from getting kissed by Thranduil.

His lips were slightly cracked, not soft and they tasted like smokey whiskey and cigarettes, with hints of coffee and lime instead of fruity cocktails and rose chapstick. Lifting one hand to his face, your fingertips grazed the rough beard growing on his sharp jawline, the stubble scratching you in a promising way.

While you had been surprised when Thranduil had kissed you, you eagerly answered Bard's kiss with fervor. Your mind already teetered on the brink of shutting down and you poured the desperation into his mouth with a moan.

He chuckled, drawing back just enough that he could spit out the lemon – sucked empty – before wiping his thump over your lips.

"Sweet thing"

There was a softness in that gesture, but only short-lived before he kissed you again. His hands trailed your body, coming to rest on either side of your neck again and even that slight of pressure loaded a million images through your head.

A second pair of hands joined him on you, it's confusing until a large body pressed into your back and you realized- it was only Thranduil.

Well, only…

It had been clear that the man could and would not accept being reduced to anything. He radiated an attitude that you would call bratty but with his expensive clothes, that rich perfume, and the wave of the hand that brought him drinks, aristocratic diva seemed more fitting.

His demanding character became clear when his hands set on your waist, immediately fingering the seam of your jeans, pulling you more into him by the belt loops.

You followed that tug, though Bard deepened the kiss to keep you by him, his tongue exploring your mouth and enticing you to breathlessly moan against his smiling lips.

Despite the loud music, Thranduil's voice was loud in your ear.

"As stunning as you right now, I can not help but imagine you squirming on our silk sheets– moving those bewitching hips of yours," Thranduil playfully took the burning tip of your ear into his mouth, "If you want to follow this invitation, of course"

"Whatever you just said," Bard broke away from you to look over your shoulder at his husband, "It better have been the idea of finally getting out of here" he pushed his hips against yours for you to feel the hard outline of him, "because I don't want to wait til the ball drops"

"Is that a metaphor?"

"Thran–" There was a warning edge in Bard's voice, and you felt Thranduil huff.

"Funny, how this old man can not take a joke as soon as he is aroused"

It's absurd how casually he said this while his hands slid down the front of your jeans, earning himself a gasp from you.

Unashamed as a man only his status can be, he toyed with the seam of your underwear, not caring one bit for the glare of his husband.

Your body arched into him, answering the question he had whispered earlier.

The only thing keeping you from getting down on your knees to worship him and his obviously talented fingers was the blaring music, reminding you that you were not yet somewhere private and very much on display.

You briefly wondered if these two were rich enough to simply pay their way out of a public indecency arrest. You wouldn't be surprised if they wouldn't even get arrested.

Since Thranduil made no sign of disengaging himself from you, you stepped away from him, right against Bard's chest.

"Shall we go? Your husband mentioned luxury sheets which I bet are more comfortable than a threesome on the dance floor"

The way out of the club presented itself as more difficult than you would have thought.

With Bard shoving a path through the dancing crowd in front of you, holding on to one hand, Thranduil breathing down your neck and you pausing now and again because "Oh my gosh, I love this song!" it took a lot longer than necessary.

Not that any one of you minded.

Lost in the mass of people shouting, dancing, and pushing you three closer together and the tequila in your bloodstream you ended up undulating to Nicki Minaj's 'Pound The Alarm' completely lost on the fact that both men had stopped to watch you.

The lights were colorful and sharp and in their hues, Bards and Thranduil's jawlines looked even sharper tinted red, blue, green, and whenever the disco ball flashed white across their faces the lust in their eyes caused shivers on every part of you.

Thranduil's hands moved to your lower abdomen, making it easy to grind against him as you raised your hands to Bard's strong shoulders.

Two huge pairs of hands gripped your waist from either side and held you steady and close to themselves, keeping everyone else from getting any nearer than they allowed.

"Fucking hell– Darlin' you drive me crazy!" Bard yelled over the music as you suddenly decided to drop down intact with the beat, dragging your nails over his torso.

You laughed, low and full-heartedly.

Coming up, his hands moved to the flushed skin that your shirt had revealed by riding up, holding you tight to sweep you away into a kiss.

One thigh, leather, and flexing muscles shoved itself between your thighs and you responded eagerly, grinding against it without a second thought.

Just when you thought you were ready to finally go, the song ended and faded into yet another pop hit. 'LoveGame' by Lady Gaga and intact of the low thumping beat, Thranduil's hips circle against your behind, pressing what was an impressive hardness into your arse while his deep voice switched from singing to humming the lyrics.

One of his hands spread over your abdomen, the other arm blindly reached for Bard and pulled him into a kiss right over your head.

Amid the mass of sweaty people and the multicolor array of colors flashing over Thranduil's blonde hair, the 2000s music blaring through the speakers and resonating in every cell of your fevered body, they looked hot enough for the porn industry to sign them under contract.

You were never making it out of the club.

You did make it out eventually, sweat dripping down your temple, Thranduil's chest in your back whenever you stumbled, his hands steadying you.

On what you assumed was an oversight or blind eye of the club owners the crowd had doubled in the last hour.

Far too many people joined the floor and even with Bard's commanding presence leading you it had been close to impossible to step forward and not swerve out of the way of someone drunk.

Outside, the line curved around the block, and those who waited or didn't get into the club or even just hung in groups celebrating on the streets blocked the whole sidewalk.

A number of fireworks were already soaring into the air, sent up there by early birds who couldn't wait until midnight – cheered up by loud excited screams and laughter as the dark night sky lit up here and there with colorful explosions.

Quite sobered up, the dancing had contributed to that, you stared at them.

"How the fuck are we supposed to get out of here?" you asked and crossed your arms in front of you; the winds were biting cold and you hadn't bothered bringing a jacket, "It's madness."

"We will just get a cab"

You barked out a laugh though Bard stayed completely serious.

"Wait, that wasn't a joke?" you rubbed your palms over the naked skin, still warm and thrumming with the afterglow of the unbearable heat of the club, although the cold fought hard and unfairly.

"No, sweetheart, it wasn't," Thranduil said, not bothered by the chaos of people pushing each other, waving their hands like they're trying to flag down a spaceship.

On this day, the chances for that to happen were more likely than actually getting a cab.

He took one step into the busy street, and you yelped, overcome by the shock that he just walked into fucking traffic, his long ponytail swaying with his steps.

Then, like movie magic, a car swerved to the side and stopped right next to Thranduil.

Bard pulled you along, your hand cradled to his chest so as not to lose you. Thranduil opened the door, gracefully sitting down behind the empty passenger seat.

You stumbled onto the back seat next to him, and mumbled a half-hearted "Hello" to the driver, who gave you a nod – a nod, an hour before midnight, from a cap driver, fucking miracles– before shut the plastic window close.

"Holy crap," you exhaled. "Is this what the high life's like? Getting drinks and cabs without any fucking effort?"

Despite the crude and cutting words swinging in their direction, Bard and Thranduil chuckled. The synchronized deep sound reverberated in the quiet cab, warming up the space instantly.

"Do you really think that this" – Thranduil languidly gestures to all of him – "takes no effort?"

Bard huffed. He leaned into you as if he wanted to whisper a secret, but didn't lower his voice: "We were supposed to be here five hours ago. Took him that long to figure out what to wear." He shot a teasing grin at his husband.

"Oh, I have had enough of your whining," In one elegant movement Thranduil folded one long leg over the other. The point of his boot caught your shin in a soft tap that drew your attention to him.

He smirked, one eyebrow raised. "If you are interested, though, I could show you what it is like to ride the waves of the high life"

"Is that a metaphor?"

"No," Bard's lips ghosted over your neck, peppering more kisses to the skin there, "A promise for an unforgettable high"

You were unable to think of what they could propose.. well, you could, but they wouldn't, not here in this cap, right?

Bard's legs were spread a little far apart and, fuck, the flickering lights of the city flying by highlighted a very prominent bulge that he made no effort of hiding. Was he going commando?!

Your eyes snapped back, burning a hole into the roof of the cab.

A hand fell behind you on the headrest at the same moment as Thranduil's cold fingers slipped onto your thigh.

Thranduil's hand snuck to your jeans and played with the button and zipper before,

Oh-

he opened your jeans and immediately slid his cold, long, slender fingers down your panties.

Oh, fuck

Your hips twitched into his hand and you had to bite down on your finger to muffle the gasp that itched behind your teeth.

Without a care in the world, Thranduil cupped your sex, mumbling something to himself under his breath that sounded like a "So fucking wet- for us?" and worked his middle finger into you.

Pulling it out again, he started circling your clit, smearing your own slick over it, moving right over the spot where your nerve endings were sparking white and hot and you shuddered uncontrollably.

The chill of his fingertips heightened your sensitivity. Still flushed all hot from the club, you instinctively arched upward, a soft gasp escaping your lips as Thranduil's fingers tapped against your swollen wet clit.

The noise prompted his gaze to lock onto yours.

Your gasp broke off as your hips nearly flew off the seat and it was only for the belt snapping tightly against your lower abdomen that your head didn't make contact with the roof.

That, and the arm Bard put around your shoulders. He held you down and gave you his biceps to let your head fall against something that wasn't the uncomfortable seatrest.

Your cheeks flushed under Thranduils scrutiny, as well as at the general scene and obscenity of everything, and a subtle smirk played on his lips.

"Do you enjoy that?" His voice was flirty, and while you want to retort that it should be very clear how much you liked his fingers fucking into you, you only managed a nod.

"Say it." He leaned forward, a teasing glint in his eyes. His fingers stopped, clearly waiting for you to obey his order. "Use your words, you still know how, right? I haven't even started, clearly there must be something you could tell me."

"Yes," your admission was barely a whisper, but it sufficed.

Thranduil hummed, using his other hand to open your legs as wide as the tight jeans allowed it before he worked two agile fingers into your throbbing cunt.

You stared at him through half-lidded eyes, watching his relaxed demeanor while fingering you open without caring about anything else.

The heel of his hand pressed into your pelvis, giving him a reasonably steady hold in the jolting cab so that he could hit a spot inside you with precision and with every, goddamn, perfect, thrust of his fingers that made you pant out.

"Thran-" the nickname you heard Bard call him slipped out unconsciously, it's the only thing you could pull out of the depth of your mind, "Thran.. please"

"Beggin' already?" Bard chuckled, "Darlin' you have seen nothing yet and here you are, beggin' to cum in the back of a cab."

"Bard you have no idea how fucking wet she is. She's dripping down my hand, squeezing my fingers, and fuck she's so tight," Thranduil muttered and as he slipped his other hand to the one slipping and sliding against your g-spot in a maddening relentless rhythm, he rubbed them over your folds.

He collected some of your wetness on those fingers, circling your clit again before pulling them away, out of your pants, and to your horror, he held them up into the air, inspecting how his fingers glistened in the city lights.

He rubbed them together, all right in the view of the rear back mirror of the cab driver, who – thank god – kept his eyes on the road and only turned up the radio in unspoken ignorance of what was happening in his car.

God, you hoped these men would tip him adequately.

"Here," Thranduil reached his arm out past your half-opened lips and for a moment you thought he was going to offer you his fingers, but he leaned further forward.

A gasp broke out of you as you watched Bard open his mouth and greedily took both fingers right between his lips, and.. sucked.

His eyes fell shut with a contented sigh as if he were tasting his favorite drink.

You saw his tongue run thoroughly over Thranduil's patiently waiting fingers, cleaning them off every last bit of you, and god, you wanted to be those fingers so damn bad at that moment.

Then he looked at you again. There was such a deep hunger in those eyes that would look beautifully between your legs, brown hair falling messily into his sight as he ate you out.

Meanwhile, Thranduil's fingers inside you moved harder and faster, curling to brush every sensitive spot of your walls, in, out, in, another curl, and then out.

You clenched your entrance in anticipation, the feeling of two of his fingers filling you this deliciously and continuously.

You were so so close, almost there–

"Shit, you're the sweetest. I think I'll eat you for breakfast tomorrow"

The abrupt halt of the cab barely registered for you; instead, it finally propelled you over the edge.

Thranduil's precise movement hit that spot inside you perfectly, crooking his fingers just right to brush against it. Combined with Bard's downright filthy promise, you nearly let out a scream as the powerful orgasm surged through you and you had to flex your muscles so you didn't continue riding his hand.

Thranduil, however, didn't stop, even though there was no way he didn't know you climaxed and he kept up the same pace, same fucking precision and pressure that your body convulsed around those long talented fingers and you couldn't even go anywhere, the seatbelt cut off your escape to the front and you were so far into the seat that wasn't an option as well, and it took a soft broken whimper, for words were long lost, for Thranduil to press a kiss to your neck before he sucked his fingers dry.

Your legs were still shaking as the elevator took you up to the penthouse at the top of the skyscraper the cab had stopped in front of.

Four mirrors gave you a splendid view of Bard's broad back as he crowded you against one of the walls, his thick fingers down your jeans again, as he mouthed hot kisses onto your neck.

"Gonna have to work you open," Bard grunted, his slippery fingers curling inside your cunt in a sinful squelch that sounded absurdly loud in the confined space of the elevator. "You're really too tight, don't wanna hurt you"

Thranduil watched the whole scene leaning at the railing, hands curled around the pole behind him as his hips twitched whenever you let out another whimper; your hands trying to get a hold on his husband's shoulders.

The ride was far too short, Bard's fingers not fast enough for you to reach another peak though the constant movement kept your head in such a nice empty mindless space that you didn't complain.

As soon as the doors opened Thranduil led the way, sauntering into the darkness illuminated by the first exploding fireworks. He pulled on the tie holding his hair up and flung it away let his hair flow down his back, ending just barely over his exquisite arse.

You didn't get to see much of the penthouse, all three of you were very eager to take this party finally somewhere comfortable and you only made out a giant white couch in front of a fireplace, an open kitchen with two glasses, one crystal with golden stains of whiskey, and the other high, the rim still dripping red wine, and a few bookshelves.

"You can get the full tour tomorrow," Bard said while you two kicked away your shoes, leaving them behind on the dark wooden parquet.

You stumbled over his left sneaker and halted in your tracks at the offer. While you had considered his promise of breakfast a spur-of-the-moment chit-chat, it now settled in your head that this wouldn't be like any one-nightstand you had in the past.

This observation only solidified as Bard caught your hand and raised it to press an open-mouthed kiss to your palm. "Do you need anything before we go into the bedroom? Any wishes or no-gos? Safeword?"

"Red," you immediately answered, and he nodded in acknowledgment, "and no, well– maybe hold me a bit afterward?" You blushed at the question though this should be the least embarrassing thing after all these two did to you in the span of a few hours. You continued to ramble, "And sometimes I cry, so.. you don't have to stop then. Sometimes I'm overwhelmed but you can continue your.. thing. Don't bother, I'll be fine on my own–"

Bard's eyebrows scrunched together the more you babbled, the look in his eyes becoming more confused until he shushed you with a quick kiss.

"Darlin', there is no need to explain what you want or don't want. If this is what you need then we won't question those demands," his eyes wandered over your face, making sure you were listening; which you were, heart pounding fast in your chest.

"And it's important you don't push yourself just because of us. It's not our intention to use you for a simple release. Thranduil and I don't take whoever is the first best, especially not to our home. We're looking for someone who suits us, with whom we feel completely comfortable and that should also be equally important to you."

You trusted them both, Bard as well as Thranduil.

The fact that Bard was asking you, nevertheless listening and responding to you was feeding something very primal.

They had done this before, unlike you. They had experience in this, but you were willing to learn, to submit yourself to these imposing men who surely would change something inside you forever.

The pride you felt at his admission of choosing you specifically mingled with the need to get this perfect man inside you quickly, especially now that he said such meaningful and reassuring words.

You nodded and croaked out a soft: "Alright, then please hold me after we're done" which he rewarded with another soft yet sensual kiss.

"Good girl"

Then his hands traveled south and slapped your ass so that your hips flew towards him.

"Now, let's not keep Thran waiting any longer. He tends to get a bit… impatient if left on his own for too long, as you've probably noticed."

Bratty.

You were so on the money earlier.

With that as well as the guess that the blonde was more kinky than the vanilla of his perfume.

At that moment the deep voice of his called out from down the hall.

"I swear, if you two started without me, I will fuck you until neither of you can walk for a week!"

Bard chuckled, then caught your widened eyes.

"He's joking," he said and you let out a relieved breath.

Bard pulled you along, a wink thrown over his shoulder.

"Mhm, partly; he won't fuck me tonight."

You needed a deep breather to ready yourself for what was about to happen, then you nearly tripped over your own feet as you raced after him through the dark hallway and to the only opened door.

You crashed fully into Bard, who for whatever reason, stood right in the doorframe of their bedroom.

"It seems Thranduil got tired of waiting," he chuckled and you wondered what he could mean when he turned sideways.

Your eyes instantly fell onto Thranduil, spread out on the enormous bed in the corner of the room– completely naked except for black, very tight boxers.

There was no air in your lungs, not a single breath left to take as you drank in the sight of him, fair and marble skin shining in the moonlight that fell through the big window next to the bed; the remaining glitter gave his body an unearthly glow. His hair fanned out all over the pillows, silver against grey, moving with him as he lazily lifted his head to stare at you.

There was an indescribable beauty in this man, he could lounge in the bed, his long legs opened in an invitation that you yearned to take, and his lean yet softly defined body posed as if he was waiting for someone to draw him.

"There you are," the corner of his mouth twitched into his smirk, "Strip"

His words, spoken in a gentle tone, boomed loud in your ears.

Your hands flew to your jeans in no second, though they were stopped by Bard, who covered them with his larger, rougher ones.

"No, Darlin', let me"

He stood behind you, taking over the job of undressing you. He did it much slower than you would have, not ripping everything apart in a hurry to obey the command of the blonde whose eyes were heavy on your body, taking in every bit of skin that got revealed.

Bard unbuttoned your jeans first, then his large and warm hands rubbed over your arms.

"Are you cold, sweetheart?"

You shook your head. "No, not cold. I– I feel like I'm burning up"

It was the truth, and nothing but the full, honest truth; you felt as hot as you did in the club, though the reason wasn't the hundreds of people and the alcohol but rather the sight of Thranduil, whose hands trailed over his own body and teasingly played with the waistband of his underwear.

Bard followed your fixated gaze to his coyly smiling husband.

"Should we turn down the heating? We would not want you melting away," Thranduil blinked his long lashes at you in faux-concern. He must've known the goosebumps covering your skin were his doing.

You would've rolled your eyes if you were able to look somewhere else than Thranduil. The man had to be magical, how else could you explain the spell he put you under if not for some supernatural powers?

"Stop the teasing, Thran," Bard cut in, slipping his hands under your shirt and kissing your shoulder. You melted into his touch, comforted that he took care of you like this when he continued, "This poor sweet thing hasn't even all her clothes off. It would be a shame to make her blush like this and not see it"

"Oh, and who's fault is that? Certainly not mine, I have been waiting so long I was close to wrapping things up myself"

Bard pulled your shirt over your head, covering your sight long enough for a wave of braveness to surge through you. "I sure hope you wrap it up," you said and heard both of them snicker.

"Do not worry," Thranduil began.

"There is enough protection for weeks," Bard finished and the band of your bra snapped against your skin.

Despite the warmness of the room your nipples puckered as soon as the lace fell away, growing hard under the avid eyes, cerulean and green, so different yet similar in the way both are dominated by the blackness of their pupils.

Bard's hands came up to your front and he cupped your breasts first tenderly, mapping out how perfectly they fit into his large palm, then rougher as his fingers found the hard buts of your nipples and rubbed them between them until every pinch had your legs trembling and you whimpering.

You cried out, body bucking on its own.

"Oh how nice," Thranduil's comment was full of sarcasm, followed by a click of his tongue against teeth, "Why, let me lay here and play all on your own, why not? After all, I am nothing but pure decoration"

Bard huffed a puff of hot air onto you, "Grow a pair of tits like this and maybe I will get to you first"

Thranduil's dark eyebrows raised to his hairline, passing an unspoken threat that had Bard scoff before he grabbed the waistband of your jeans. He pulled them down slowly, getting on his knees as he did and you were acutely aware of how wet your panties were when you feel his lips kiss your ass.

"This must be uncomfortable," he murmured, holding one leg to help you step out of the jeans. He kneaded your thigh, fingertips against muscles and flesh, before moving on to do the same on your other leg.

He used the moment where you lifted the second leg, to dive his hand to your cunt again, dragging his knuckles over the dark-colored patch, and he laughed as you buckled into the touch. "Oh, the fun we'll have"

Finally, undressed to your panties that cling to your crotch like a second skin, you were free to walk toward the bed. You would've lied if you said you didn't swing your hips a little bit, relishing the raspy groan this evoked from Bard.

Feeling like you should await further commands you stopped (un)patiently when your knees hit the mattress.

Thranduil's lips curved into a devilish smirk at this sign of submission.

He let his legs fall open wider, waving in an elegant gesture into the space in between. "Come here, sweetheart"

The bed was raised and you rose to your tiptoes and, making sure your eyes were trained on Thranduil, you crawled over the mattress, knees digging into the silk duvet he had promised you.

He reached out as soon as he could, one hand curving around your neck to pull and you landed directly on him, legs spread on either side of his thighs, hands somehow, despite their nervous trembling, found their place against his collarbones, standing out from his broad chest rather delicate.

Not that you hadn't suspected and expected him to be big, but, fuck, he was long and hard, a pulsing pressure against your stomach.

"Be a good girl and remove this unnecessary fabric, will you?" Thranduil whispered and you scrambled to lose your panties, throwing them off into the distance only to turn again and find him smirking. "I meant my boxers, but it fills me with joy seeing you this eager"

Lowering your head to hide your laughter, you grabbed his boxers. He lifted his hips just barely for you to pull on the black boxers, rolling them over his tight ass, and after giving you a loving pat on the head, he crossed his arms behind his head, relaxing into the pillows.

His cock sprung free from the containment of the tight boxers, twitching as it hit his abdomen and you felt your throat dry out.

Of course, he was smooth everywhere; not one bit of hair covering the flushed beauty of him.

You sat up, hands pushed into his flexing thighs, to take him all in. No one should look this perfect, this utterly ridiculously beautiful, right? There should be something on him, a scar, a mole, anything to prove he wasn't straight-up carved out of marble, but you found nothing.

You glared at him as you sat down a bit lower, ass in the air, and spit into your hand before you wrapped it around his cock. The sight of his size had your mouth water, and seeing how your fingers couldn't meet had your cunt clench around nothing.

No way any of their preparation had been enough for this intimidating masterpiece of Mother Nature's creation.

"Tell me, how is it fair that you are rich and have a dick like that?" you asked and just as Thranduil opened his pretty lips for probably another witty answer, you interrupted him by letting his cock slide over your tongue deep into your throat until you gagged around him.

Whatever he wanted to say was forgotten.

Instead, Thranduil groaned a low: "Fuck" and threw his head back.

You wanted to see him come undone, to unravel him until he lost this bratty attitude and reduce him to that wild behavior he had shown in the club.

You had the feeling that that's only possible if he thought he had the upper hand.

You bobbed your head, taking him a bit past what you could manage without gagging before lifting your head again.

"Use me," you said and his eyes flew open.

"What?"

Cocking your head, you shot him a confused look, while spreading his precum over the head of his cock with your thumb. "I said," – you spit again, mixing it and coating his dick further – "Fuck - my - mouth"

Every word was punctuated with a kiss to his slit, and you swore you could see his eyes darken further; black taking over blue – desire fought whatever held him back to fucking give into whatever you offered.

Behind you, Bard swore nearly breathlessly: "Fuck me" though you stayed focused on Thranduil.

"Are you sure?" his voice was raw, his facade of composure cracking ever so slightly.

"Wouldn't ask if I wasn't"

His hand was behind your head in seconds, drawing you down his cock again and you opened your mouth wide to not hurt him. He pushed you down until you choked on him and although your eyes watered, you couldn't take them away from the sight of his mouth and the low throaty groans that passed the opened lips.

The lack of air cut off your moan, the tip of his cock bullying the back of your throat just barely short of painful. Reminding yourself to breathe through your nose, you inhaled deeply.

"Good girl," Thranduil's hips bucked, pulling back until he was only half-lodged in your throat, "Just like that, fuck"

He gave an experimental thrust, keeping his sharp eyes on you, his hand in your neck, ready to stop if he saw any discomfort, but all you showed him was how you choked on spit and salty precum.

"Oh, you sweet girl. Behaving so well," his voice was ruined, and he thrusted again, punching away the little breath left in the tiniest space that wasn't occupied by his thick cock.

This was by far the first time you have ever given a blowjob, but it was a first to let someone use you like this. Controlling when you could suck or when you just had to take what he gave you.

And oh– how much you loved it.

So much that you wanted to rub your thighs together only to be stopped by rough hands grabbing them.

A confused sound left you, no more than a choked "Huh?" vibrating around Thranduils cock continuing to fuck into you, just like you had asked him, hindering you from turning to see what Bard was up to.

He didn't leave you wondering for long, just as Thranduil's thrusts took on a sharper edge, hitting the back of your throat every time, filling your mouth like no man ever had, Bard's flattened tongue licked through your exposed cunt and the moan you let out sounded so pornographic you surprised yourself.

"Do it again," Thranduil took in the sight of your wet lips, the drool dripping out of the corners of your mouth, his cock disappearing so deep inside you that felt him in your lungs, "Fuck, Bard, do that again now!–"

He talked for you, praising Bard as he licked your pussy again, this time using his fingers to pry you open further and there was the delicious scratch of his beard stubbles, burning on your skin.

You cried out, tried to do, stopped by Thranduils cock stuffing your mouth again and again, his hands curled around your neck as if he wanted to feel the imprint of himself pushing through.

"Prettiest woman out there," Thranduil groaned. His thump reached over to stuff some of the spit back into your mouth, opening your jaw up impossibly wide.

Bard's tongue was as precise as their fingers have been, covering your folds, fucking into your hole and sucking on your clit with expertise that no man should be allowed to have. Two of his wet fingers slid into you while his tongue mercilessly attacked your clit, the other hand buried itself in the soft flesh of your ass, kneading and pulling, opening you up further for his face.

"C'mon," his voice was muffled by your thighs, drowning you in his accent while he drowned his tongue inside your opening, circling the rim in maddening figures, "Give me one more, gorgeous."

Electricity flowed through your body, hot tingles of nothing but fire spreading into your fingertips wrapped around the inches of Thranduil's cock that didn't fit into your mouth, to your nipples that brushed against his muscular thighs.

"Fuck Bard, please–"

Not sure what you were begging for, for his tongue to stop the attack on your clit, for his fingers constantly finding that spot inside your spongy walls that had you wailing and rolling your hips into his face, or for him to get on with it and get you over that build-up.

Bard kept going, somehow finding a rhythm that matched the one his husband hammered down your throat and you were helplessly stuck trying to hold on.

Until you lost the fight to keep yourself upright. Your hands slipped on Thranduil's thighs, your body crashed down and if it wouldn't have been for his quick reaction of pulling himself out of you, you would for sure have impaled your head on his still hard and throbbing cock.

Instead, it just wetly slapped your face as you collapsed into his lap.

Bard's rough hands grip your thighs, blunt nails digging into soft flesh as he maneuvered your legs around to give his head more space.

The other pair of hands, soft, delicate, Thranduil's, cupped your face, lifting it gently yet demanding, giving him the perfect view of your cute face, all scrunched up as you gasped and mewled, and your backside, ass arched into the air under Bard's commanding hands.

"Such a beautiful thing," Thranduil mused.

His fingers danced over your cheeks until he used another whine, another desperate moan when Bard alternated between open-mouthed, sloppy kisses and using the point of his tongue, to slip his thumb into your mouth.

As soon as he did, you closed your lips around him. Staring up at him, begging him silently for a release only Bard could give you, you started sucking on his finger as you would have done on his cock if not for the stars dancing in your field of vision.

Thranduil tutted, "So needy as well. Bard, if you were so kind as to stop, I can not stand seeing her this distraught. I think you are working her up far too much"

"Nooo! Please, please, I'm alright, I'm– please, so close," The desperate scream that came out of your mouth at his words was probably loud enough to alert the neighbors, followed by a cry and sob as Bard kissed your clit one last time.

"Of course, babe" The words were muffled, spoken directly into your dripping cunt.

Which he then shuffled away from, beard stubble scratching you, his fingers letting loose on your thighs.

"No, no please, please," you were already babbling, reaching behind you in a sad effort to force him back between your legs, "Please, I'll be good, please!"

"You sweet thing," Thranduils arms wrapped around your middle, pulling you up into a kiss, "I think–" his voice dropped deeper and you heard the rustle of plastic, felt Bard's hand rolling the condom over Thranduil's cock pressing into your stomach, "–you have behaved so well, you deserve a reward"

You nodded fast, legs spread wide apart sitting on his thighs and your cunt stretched open.

Staring into his eyes, you saw how much his pupils were dilated, how he only watched you, only saw you.

You could see and feel his chest lift as his cock slid through your folds, finding you drenched from all their playing around.

"Eyes stay on me"

Your pussy was wet enough for the tip of his cock to slip right into you and right away you wanted to shut your eyes at the sensation of him spearing you open.

"Please���," you gasped, and tried to move your hips to get more of him into you than just those few inches, but he didn't budge, didn't loosen his grip on your waist, "Please, Thranduil. Green, my color is green, fuck me, I can take it!"

"Yes, and if not," his voice was back to the self-controlled powerful tone, "I'll make you take it, sweetheart."

Thranduil let go of you the second he snapped his hips upwards and suddenly, you were split open.

You keened as his cock sunk into you in one fast, swift, hard movement. There was a burn, in your thighs as you flexed them, in your throat as you cried out, in your pussy at the intrusion of his long cock.

When Thranduil bottomed out, his head shoved against your cervix, the whole length forcing you to stretch, to make room, and fuck you wanted your pussy to be carved into the shape of that perfect cock.

It should've been uncomfortable, but you only groaned as you appreciated the second he gave you to relax while making room where they shouldn't be some.

"Fuck–" he moaned, "you are tight, so fucking tight"

Bard moved next to you, and you could only get one short look at his naked body, the brown hair coating his muscular chest, the happy trail leading down to his thick cock, before Thranduil began to fuck you.

His strokes were fast, hips snapping into you and nearly throwing you off his lap at the speed and brute force and you fell into his chest, clinging to his arms.

This, him rutting into you like your pussy could quench a year-long thirst at a punishing pace, this was surely the epitome of getting fucked. How he knew how to fuck you just right, hitting your g-spot with every single thrust was a riddle you couldn't and wouldn't want to solve; not with his cock penetrating you hard enough you swore you felt him in your throat as you called for him through moans.

You had no chance of even trying to meet his thrusts, not while he pounded into you like a madman.

"F-Fuck, good fucking girl– so tight," Thranduil groaned out his gritted teeth, his face turning a beautiful shade of rosé, "Even tighter than you, Bard–"

Bard, you totally forgot he was even there, laughed and moved on the bed again, slipping back behind you, "Yeah? Tell me more"

And you wanted to scream, to yell at them to stop talking in words that only added to the overstimulation, that spun around your head without meaning because how could anything have ever any meaning more important that Thranduil's cock fucking you a little further, a little deeper.

"So tight, s-so hot, clamping down on me like this sweet, fuck, pussy doesn't want me to leave"

"Mhm, I can see that," Bard hummed and his hands caressed your shaking thighs, before leaving his mark on your ass with a soft slap that had you wailing into Thranduil's shoulder.

It was too much and not enough at the same time.

You were going to lose your mind like this, fucked to near-unconsciousness.

"More, I–" your speech was slurred, brain scrambled into loose words hanging onto thin threads.

You tried to hold on to Thranduil but it was impossible with your sweat and the glitter covering him.

Luckily for you, Bard found the time to stop ever kindly toying with the pearl of your clit to lean forward.

"Put them inside his hair, Darlin'. He doesn't mind" There was a lopsided smirk on his face that you could barely see out of the corners of your eyes.

You still hadn't stopped looking at Thranduil.

The attempt to tentatively guide your hands to his head was prevailed by another particular hard thrust, and your fingers slid through blonde locks, grabbing onto them as you fell back down on Thranduil's cock.

You tugged on them much harsher than intended.

Thranduil's eyes blew wide.

You wanted to apologize when his lips quivered and his hips snapped into yours even faster.

Quickly you reached for him again, nails scraping his scalp as you readjusted, gripping more, much tighter.

"That's it, Darlin'.. that's my girl," Bard leaned back, and not shortly after his fingers were back on your clit, tapping intact of Thranduil's thrusts.

It was only a matter of seconds until the pleasure became too much.

Thranduil's hips fell into a stutter as your walls clenched around him; even for someone with his stamina the heat of you surrounding him, and your sweet moans drove him into a raging need to imprint the shape of his cock inside you.

"F-fuck.. Thran–" you whimpered, hands fisting his hair, trying to get a literal grip as reality started to shift around you.

Outside, close to the windows, there was a whistle as the first of many fireworks greet the New Year and just as Thranduil pushed you over the edge, your whole body shaking and tensing up as you screamed his name, the darkness of the sky exploded into an arrangement of thousands of colors.

The white fuzziness that enveloped your vision transformed into creeping darkness at the edges.

Your eyelids closed shut as you descended into blissful oblivion.

When you came back to yourself, it was to the murmur of deep voices mixed into the loud bangs of fireworks.

For a moment you had no idea where you were, enveloped in a haziness inside your mind, but the gentle nudge of something against your lips forced you to open your eyes.

There were two faces very close to yours, was the first realization.

Then, following up, you let out a giggle.

"Don't look so concerned, I'm fine," you greedily took a sip from the water bottle that the very flushed blonde held in his hands.

"You said it was possible you would cry, not bloody pass out on Thran's dick!" Bard wiped the drops you couldn't swallow away from the corner of your mouth with one hand and continued to rub your thighs with his others.

You hadn't noticed they were still shaking.

"Yeah, that never happened before," you shot a smirk up to Thranduil, "Never had a guy fuck me like this as well"

He snorted into the bottle of water, "Believe me, I never had someone lose their consciousness on me before as well. I came shortly after you and when I opened my eyes to find you completely out of it I nearly passed out on the spot as well"

"Would have been quite a shock for you," you said and let your head fall to the side to look at Bard, "both of us orgasm into fainting"

"Not funny, Darlin'," Bard warned, though he laughed as you stuck his tongue out at him.

Stretching your hands over your head and raking them into the air until your bones cracked, you sighed happily. Blissfulness was all you felt after cumming harder than you ever had.

For the first time, you could really enjoy the sight of both men in the nude, you hadn't had the chance to appreciate how fit Bard was while Thranduil had fucked you and you reached out to run your hands over his chest. Twirling some of the hair on there, traveling lower to scratch nails down his happy trail like a route description straight to his still-hard cock.

Stopping shortly before his pubic hair, you glanced up at him, a coy smile playing your lips. "You haven't cum yet." It was much a purr as it was an invitation, your legs falling open right when Bard's hand came to a still on your thighs.

He shook his head, chestnut hair swaying with the movement. "No, Darlin', no! You just passed out. I won't force myself on you. Thran can suck me off or I'll take care of it myself if you want to rest"

Your heart contracted in adoration for this man, and an embarrassing amount of slick gushed out of you.

"Bard," you said, voice wavering as you suppressed a whimper. Somehow this turned you on even more, "Bard, there is enough time to be this caring later but please–" Once again you were begging, and the man wasn't even inside of you yet, "please fuck me"

On the other side of you, Thranduil chuckled, "Insatiable, I knew it. Bard is right though, if you are not well, then he can fuck me"

Slowly but surely you were losing your patience.

As sweet as their concern was, the fact that these two gods were both sitting naked in front of you, one sweaty because he just knocked you out, and the other hard as steel and flushed, only aroused that much more.

Without saying anything else, you maneuvered yourself in the bed until you could rest your head on Thranduil's stretched legs and angled your legs in an invitation.

"Come on you stud. It's the new year after all"

The brunette scanned you with a piercing gaze, you could see him struggling with himself, but the twitch of his cock told you what he'd decided before he nodded.

"Thran, condom please"

You giggled again, excitement and the need to be catapulted to new heights spreading warmly in your stomach.

As Bard put the condom on, you wiggled around, your hand on the move to beat time, but Thranduil reached over you.

He caught your wrist before you reached your center, grasping it with his much larger hand and pulling your arm back with him enough that it forced your shoulders up, a "Tze, tze, tze" admonishing the behavior.

"Impatient brat, make up your mind!" he hissed and tugged some more until you whined, "Feel free to use those pathetic little fingers, knowing they will never fill you the way Bard could" Now that Thranduil knew you were on the same page, his voice dropped into that rebuking tone that left you whining and pouting.

He was so good, so fucking mean in the right amount you never knew you needed a man to act in bed.

"I just wanted–"

"I know baby," he cooed, and patted your cheek, "you just need your cunt to be filled, right? Just need to be stuffed full. Bard will do that for you, no need to worry your pretty head about it"

"That's right, Darlin'," Bard shuffled in between your legs, hooking them both over his thighs as he leaned over you. His cock landed on your abdomen, pressing against your pulsating clit, "Tell me what you want," he grabed himself, guiding it slowly toward where you leaked for him, completely drenched from the orgasms they had already given to you.

"I can go slow, or I can go fast"

You contemplated for a moment and lift the free hand to stroke over his handsome face. His beard tickled the inside of your palm, the chestnut waves silky as the sheets.

"Slow," you whispered, "I want you slow first"

"Alright," he gently nudged his nose against yours before capturing your lips in a kiss.

Although you were still sensitive, still pulsing and throbbing due to Thranduil (who caressed your face and your neck, having let to of your hand to arrange the pillows in his back for more comfort), you relished the stretch and sting of Bard as he guided his cock into you.

He was thicker than Thranduil, not by much but that inch made itself known, splitting you open heavenly so. You gasped into the kiss, giving up the fight of tongues to swallow back the drool that collected the further Bard pushed inside you.

It's just a little bit, one inch at a time, but you cried out all the same.

The thrum of excitement pulses, leaves you trembling and begging in incoherent moans and whimpers.

You could feel him throbbing inside you.

"Good girl," Thranduil's praise washed over you, chilled fingers tweaking one of your nipples as a reward for the exhausted smile you gifted him at that, "Has anyone ever told you that you make just the sweetest sounds? Give me one more?"

He twisted your other nipple; you moaned again.

"Fuck, Thran, you were so right," Bard grunted, his fingernails digging into where he held you by the waist, leaving crescent moon-shaped imprints that you hoped wouldn't fade for a while, "She's fuckin' tight; how are you still this tight?"

"For you," you fisted your hands into his hair again, hoping he enjoyed it just as much as his husband, "J-just for you, everything, ngh– for you"

With one last push, he sheated himself in you completely, filling you up just like Thranduil told you he would, stretching your walls thin.

You felt him everywhere, in every part of your body.

Every nerve, every tendon, every cell burns and was lit aflame, sizzling hot fire licking your skin and bursting when he dragged himself out, leaving barely the tip and pushed back in.

His cock nestled deep inside you, Bard stilled.

There was a silent vigilance in his mesmerizing green eyes. "Talk to me beautiful, is this alright?"

You nodded and pulled him down on his hair into another kiss. "Yes, god, yes"

That's all he needed to hear and while licking over your lips, entangling your tongue with his playfully, he set a slow rhythm. Nevertheless the tempo, he brushed that spot inside you with every stroke.

Pins and needles all over your skin, goosebumps wherever Thranduil's fingers wandered.

There were more fireworks, lightening up the bedroom filled with gasps and grunts, whispers of encouragement and begging. The sound of Bard's hips snapping into yours, the wet squelch of his cock driving itself inside of your pussy again and again.

"There we go," he murmured and positioned his arms on either side of you, using the balance it gives him to roll his hips instead of just thrusting. Mumbling between kisses, he talked against your lips: "Aren't you just the sweetest? Darlin', I couln' believe my eyes when I saw you in that club, shining far brighter than anyone else"

He swallowed your gasps with kisses, nipping at your lip then moved to your earlobe, "You are so perfect, letting us fuck you like this"

In one swift movement, he dragged Thranduil towards him, long blonde hair curling at the edges hanging into your vision in a starlight waterfall. Their kiss left you breathless and you would have felt left out if Thranduil didn't lean down further to you, kissing your lips upside down.

This time it was his fingers that found your slick, poor and abused clit. A couple of firm circles had your hips bucking up to meet Thranduil's fingers, crying out for both men in a mix of their names.

You whimpered as the next orgasm build up fucking fast, your breath catching in your throat.

"Bard," your hips moved on their own, trying to get him to fuck you faster, "Please– more, I need m-more,"

"Darlin'," Bards forehead pressed against yours, his grunts strained as if he was holding back himself but kept the same and steady pace you asked him for, "You sure?"

Grabbing his hair again, you weaved your fingers through it, tousling it haphazardly, achieving nothing but adding to its wild appearance.

When you met his gaze again, his eyes were fixed on you, it felt electric and charged, akin to lightning, causing you to momentarily forget to breathe.

"Yes"

He obeyed instantly, with the next thrust you screamed at the pure force of it. Bard wa spiraling the same way you were, becoming erratic as his teeth grazed over your collarbone, biting every mark they have left on you.

Raising your legs to keep him close, your ankles locked behind his back, heels digging into the tight muscles of his ass. The new angle allowed him to drive impossibly deep, reaching pleasure points inside you you didn't knew existed before him.

The pleasure was blinding, high electricity running through your veins and into every part of your body and soul. This was nothing you have ever experienced before, not with anyone and they made sure it would never feel like this with anyone ever.

Bard, feeling how your walls clenched around him, fluttering and pulsating, begging him to stay inside, sucked on your nipple, hard.

"I need you to come, fuck. Let me feel this pussy come, I'm right there with you," he rasped, voice like gravel, leaving you to scream for him, head knocking into Thranduil's legs, who dared to add to the crescendo of your pleasure and pressed down on your clit.

You found yourself gripping the bed covers, fingers twisting, in an attempt to anchor yourself, sobbing and shaking.

Instead, the coil inside you snapped.

Soaking Bard's cock choking and sobbing, tears spilling out of the corners of your eyes as every limp of you tensed up, he pushed you over the edge, his moans in your ear the most erotic thing.

You felt Bard following you, felt him spilling inside the condom, his cock twitching inside of you as he reached his peak moaning and burying himself to the deepest point, hips flushed close against yours, still rolling and shoving into you.

Moments of silence and heavy breathing followed. Of broken sobs, hushed murmurs of praise, even more affirmations.

Thranduil scootched closer to you, laying down next to you while Bard's weight on top of you was just what you needed. The heaviness of his much larger frame and Thranduil's long arms wrapped around you held back the cold that threatened to take a hold of you as the shivers of pleasure subsided.

"Gods," Bard exhaled, chest moving, pressing more into you. "That was something"

"Happy New Year" Thranduil rumbled.

Minutes passed, more fireworks exploded, celebrations of the New Year while you weren't even sure you even knew what time was anymore.

Bard tried to move, though your legs must have cramped for they felt disconnected to your body.

"Darlin'," he dropped another kiss to your neck, laughing low as your head lolled to the side.

"Mhm-mhm," you groaned, eyes still shut close, "Stay"

His lips moved to your ear, continuing to bathe you in soft kisses that leave you floating in that blissful headspace. "I know, I know–"

Thranduil's hands cupped your face, caressing your glowing cheeks and wiped away the loose tears that rolled over them. "Aftercare first, then cuddling," he whispered and cradled your head, massaging the spot in your neck that started to ache after Bard had folded you in half.

Despite knowing he was right, that you needed to use the bathroom, the warmth their bodies provided held you back.

You whined, arching your back into Bard's chest as he pried your legs away and slowly pulled himself out of you, stopping when your hips twitched at the overstimulation and only continued after a soothing kiss.

As soon as he left to stand up, tying up the used condom and going into the ensuite bathroom, Thranduil's steady hands on your back helped you sit up on the edge of the bed, where he wrapped the covers around your shoulders and gently tapped your nose, before scratching his nails over your head.

"You did very well, sweetheart," One finger tipped your chin up. "Thank you, you are a wonderful partner."

Thranduil, crouched to your level in front of you, still naked as the day he was born, simply picked you up. Legs folded over one arm, your head fell against his glittery chest that was covered in red streaks of where your nails had scratched him.

"Come on, let's get you cleaned up"

The afterglow of the very much fantastic sex lulled all three of you in a comfort that blurred the barriers of you being a stranger in their home, laughter and giggles as the shower washed away sweat and glitter.

While there was a liveness to massaging soap into hair, hands rubbing away soreness and splashing water around until the mirror was all but fogged up and steam filled the entire bathroom, the exhaustion of the night caught up close after Thranduil dressed you in one of Bard's large sweaters.

Smelling like wood shavings, pine and toothpaste, hair still damp and eyes dropping close even though you tried to stay awake, Thranduil carried you to the bed.

The sheets were changed, encasing you in laundry detergent and brushing against your naked legs as you let yourself be placed on the pillows.

Outside, the world still celebrated and you did as well, in your own way.

There was a shuffle, a murmur of voices, then the bed dipped on either side as Bard climbed to your right side and Thranduil to your left, leaving not much room between all of you, legs entangling with each other, more giggling until everyone lied down comfortably.

Face tugged under Bard's chin, one arm of his reaching over your head so that Thranduil could nestle his face into it and the blonde wrapped around your back, you were surrounded by something you couldn't put into words.

"Maybe– maybe you can stay for breakfast and lunch," Bard's low words were murmured with a deep sigh, his other hand sliding down under his sweater, resting just below where your heart sung contenly.

"And dinner," Thranduil added and you heard him kiss Bard's hand.

"No talky-talky," you snuggled your face deeper into Bard, nose bumping into his neck, "But I would like that, very much"

Just as you fell asleep, held tightly by them both, you could hear them exchange quiet I love you's and you smiled, feeling their love seep deep into your bones.

[strrykais]

promiscuous💋 [lee haechan]

pairing: clubbing!haechan x afab!reader

word count: 1.3k

summary: in a small club you don’t remember the name of, this wasn’t exactly how you thought it would go but you weren’t exactly the type to complain.

genre: smut, humor

warnings: oral (fem receiving), fingering, unprotected sex, sex in a public place, creampie??(is that a warning) and any other warning i forgot, you get it

playlist: promiscuous- nelly furtado | just dance - lady gaga | PADO- NCT U

authors note: first first official sex written gotta get practice in before i write it for my smau, so sorry if its like bad. im just a girl. next time ill do research or something idk. if there is any mistakes please let me know. i ran through it quickly but could of missed something! hope you enjoy 💋 nct dream masterlist

the hot, sweaty bodies rubbing against you was enough for you to start feeling the 6 shots you took. you needed this night, with work overworking you, your boyfriend of years breaking up with you, so what if you had planned to go home with someone tonight. you were planning on going home with someone. 

“jaemin bought another round. you want in?” renjun says in your ear over the loud music while you two dance together.

“is that even a question?” you shout back grabbing his hand heading out the dance floor to find your other friend you came with.

even though it was a thursday night the club was packed. spotting jaemin talking to the bartender or more like trying to hit on them. you and renjun walk up to him, jaemin's big smile comes to view when he sees you and renjun. 

“hey guys just in time! my friend here-” he says trailing off to look over at the pretty boy.

“that’s jeno.” you laugh out loud slightly pushing him “your boyfriend, you idiot.” you turn to jeno motioning another shot for us. jeno gives you a thumbs up ignoring whatever jaemin is mumbling,

“so you spot anyone you wanna take home?” renjun asks, leaning onto the bar watching the crowd. you turn to copy his position shaking your head.

“a lot of grenades.” a frown taking over your face as renjun shoves you.

“we talked about you calling people 'grenades’ if you don’t find them attractive. it's rude.”  grabbing the shot jeno places out for the both of you, downing it barely making a face.

“it's only rude if they catch me calling them that to their face.” you shrug “is tonight the night we sleep together?” rubbing up on his arm.

rejun pulls a face, swatting your hand away from his arm, “no you're not my type.” he smirks when he sees your face. walking away, you throw your hand out, “but i did find someone who is, catch you later.” he waves you off. 

groaning you turn to face the couple, only for jaemin to have his head on the bar completely passed out.

“what a lightweight seriously” pushing off the bar you decided to walk around and look for someone you could maybe, possibly, at least make out with. while looking around you see someone who looks good from behind. putting on your best smile, you slowly walk to him as he turns to you. your smile drops, eyes in a panic, you frantically search for a way to hide.

in the corner of your eyes you see a door open, you quickly shove the guy back in, shoving him into the small bathroom. body pressed into his as you breathe out, glad you escaped your ex. you hear him clear his throat, you quickly look up to see him looking at you with a smirk. he was hot maybe the bar isnt filled with grenades.

“if you wanted my attention you could’ve talked to me instead of trapping me in the bathroom. this one is new though so i have to give you that.” he smirks, placing his hand on your waist rubbing circle over your dress.

“cute that you think i need to trap you to get your attention.” hand sliding up onto his shoulder giving him a look.

“is this where i think it's going?” his hand reaching out grabbing your face staring down at your lips. 

licking your lips, you nod as he yanks your face into his. lips crashing onto each other, a small whimper escaping. quickly gaining his composure flipping you around so your back was pressed into the wall.  he pulled back as you let out a little whine. gripping the back of his neck trying to tug him to you, he smiles. 

“are you sure you are okay with continuing?” he questioned, you couldn’t help but get even more turned on. quickly nodding your head. he dives into your neck leaving sloppy kisses and light nibbles. you tried not to get too lost in his touch, you could barely hear the loud music outside the bathroom. his large hands roamed your body, every spot he touched was ignited.. after making a mess on your neck he slowly makes his way down to your collarbone giving it a bite. this makes you moan, audioably. 

 “oh,so you like it when i'm a little rough? noted.” he says as he sinks to his knees. he was now looking up at you, his hair a mess from your hands trying to touch every part of him, trying to melt into him. you give a small nod as he lifts one leg over his shoulder, he scoots a little closer where you can feel his hot breath fanning across your soaked panties. 

“please shut up” you say so out of breath from the kisses he was placing on your inner thighs.

“i'm sorry baby what did you say?” 

“please make your mouth useful instead of working my nerves.”

he gently pushes your panties to the side and blows which causes you to jump, but before you couldn't even recover he immediately went to licking. your breathless moans were starting to get louder, your hand flung to his head pushing him closer into you. he worked his tongue so magically. sucking on your clit, causing your back to arc. he slips a finger right into you as he still sucks. quickly as the first he slips a second, a loud moan makes him quicken his pace. your body could barely keep up as you felt yourself cum on his face. he continued licking every drop, slowly exiting his fingers out.

looking at you, bringing those to his mouth and sucking his beautiful long fingers clean of your juices. quickly as you could you reached out to his belt and started unbuckling them. 

“oh someone is eager.” 

“ill leave.”

“no. no i was kidding, baby.” 

grabbing you from behind your thighs, you jump up and wrap your legs around his waist. he slowly drags his cock along your folds. gathering up your juices from your previous orgasm.

“fuckkk you're so wet i can't wait to feel your tight cunt around me.” 

“if you shut up and get on with it may-” words falling short from your mouth and into a moan as he slams right into you. his hands are squeezing your ass as he pushes himself in and out.

“oh my fucking god. oh god.” 

“not my name but i see why it gets confused.” his arrogant tone causes you to tighten around him, moaning out. “fuck you are so tight.” he continues to pound harshly into you. leaning your head against the wall, he takes that chance and starts sucking on your neck. he bounces you up to readjust you, his cock hitting a specific spot inside you causing you to lead out a loud moan. 

“oh fuck imma come” you moan out pulling his hair.

“come for me baby. come right on this cock.” his heated moans hitting your ears. his words trigger your orgasm, his hand flying up to cover your mouth as your eyes squeeze shut. your cunt squeezing him, grunting “imma cum in you kay’” you nod your head, he thrusts one last time harshly into you, releasing his load.

“fuck that was the best sex ive had in a while.” he says slowly sliding himself out of you placing your wobbly legs onto the ground. 

“yeah, same. thanks.” you grab your panties from under your dress pulling them off slowly slipping them into his now buttoned pants. “to remember me.” turning you walk out the bathroom.

“yo dude where the hell have you been. why do you lo-" renjun says, spotting you as you walk away from the bathroom. “oh i see, good work. get his name?” you shake your head and smile. “looks like you just might.” he says, turning away when you feel a hand twist you around. 

“let me get your number please. maybe we can do this again and not in a bathroom.”

“sure. whats your name?” you grab his phone typing in your name and number.

“haechan, lee haechan.” 

“i can see how that gets confused with god. bye haechan, call me.” 

© strrykais

[pearl-blue-musings]

die with a smile

If you’re wondering if this is based on the Bruno mars and lady Gaga song then you’d be correct

Pairing: Alhaitham x reader

Warnings: mentions of death, slight angst, comfort, written real fast, I just love him a lot

Word count: 1.5K

Dreams had always seemed like a far fetched idea to residents of Sumeru. Once they became adults, dreaming was a fleeting memory, words of myth, and lest be researched. However, after the events with the old grand sage and the Dendro archon, all citizens of Sumeru were once again able to experience the highs and lows of dreams. Dreams could be fleeting and wonderful. Some people discovered what nightmares were for the first time. All of it was truly exhilarating for Sumerians. And equally terrifying.

How many nights has it been since he’s slept? Alhaitham obviously knew the answer, but disregarding the answer could also put his mind at ease. The bags under his eyes seem to multiply as the days drag on. Under the lamp of his deck, he rubs at his eyes to stay awake and does his best not to succumb to slumber. The grand scribe sighs as he mulls over the latest notes from the sages meetings and potential research projects. He can’t avoid it forever. He can’t avoid you forever. But he’s gonna try his damn hardest. And it’s all because of his dreams.

Night after night they become more and more vivid. Most times, it’s nonsense and other times you’re there. Sometimes it’s peaceful days where the two of you are reading together under a tree, you running into a shallow river and splashing the both of you. Or maybe you both are running the Akademiya together. He can smell the parchment within the House of Daena and hear the turning of pages as you two walk hand in hand. Then there are dreams where he’s staring at himself, unsure of what’s happening. All he sees are the tears in his own eyes as whoever’s eyes he’s looking through are being lowered. He’s woken up with a gasp and sweat on his brow with you curled beside him.

As the nights had continued, the dream would give more background; which had led to his insomnia. He’s seeing the world through your eyes, which makes him elated, but he then realizes that his dream is of your funeral and eventual death. The dream, for some reason, is going in reverse order and if he sleeps one more night ... so he’s resigned to not sleep.

His body shakes in his desk as he fights sleep. You’d have to be blind to not see how he’s been avoiding sharing a bed with you; to him that’s where the dreams are the worst. You took it upon yourself to visit him at his office. You want to be there for him as you can see he’s struggling on his own. You even reached out to Kaveh and the architect was at a loss for words. Alhaitham barely registers the sound of your footsteps along the tile of his office as you gently place your hands on his shoulders. Your voice is a gentle whisper, is he dreaming again? “Haitham,” you coo quietly, “you need to sleep.”

“I’m fine, darling,” he says with a frustrated yawn. You roll your eyes and start to clean up his desk. Alhaitham sits back in his chair and sighs with his arms crossed. “I told you-“

“Why aren’t you sleeping?”

Tired eyes blink slowly as the scribe scrounges up a reply. “There is too much to do.”

“You can’t lie to me,” you mumble with a tremor. “If there’s something I’ve done, please let me know.”

At that, Alhaitham quickly pushes himself out of the chair to hold you tight. His arms encompass you fully and you can feel how shaky he is. He breathes in your scent, placing the tip of his nose at your pressure point to feel your pulse. He visibly softens at feeling you within his arms. Shakily, he whispers, “you haven’t done anything my love. I,” he stops hugging you to cup your cheeks. Your eyes dance in the lamp light as you stare at him, your gaze full of love and adoration for the man in front of you. Alhaitham blinks. “I’ve been having…negative dreams.

“About you.” He carefully lowers his head and voice as he finally adds on, “dying. But it hasn’t happened.” You give him a quizzical look as you tilt your head to the side. You hold onto his hands gently as a sign for him to keep on. “The dream happens in reverse. Each night,” he breathes out, “a new scene gets added. The first was seeing me through, I’m assuming your eyes. Being lowered into the ground. I was crying.”

You move your hands to his cheeks to ground him. His lips tremble at his own emotions bubbling over and you move him to the couch in his office. You lay his head into your lap and start to play with his silver hair, something he secretly loves.

“Each night, I get more context. And I calculated that 8 nights ago would be the time I would see what happens to you and,” his voice echoes as it trails off. “I don’t want to see you leave. I don’t want to have to say goodbye to the best thing that has happened to me.” He sits up to look you in the eye, his own glassing over with tears you assume he had in the dream. Seldom do you see your boyfriend cry, and it must have taken so much of him to not let this overflow. Your throat clogs up with your own sobs wanting to shake you. You shake your head from the hurt coming from this man in your arms. This is someone who always had to rely on himself to deal with his emotions or pack them faraway. Although you’re struggling to soak in what he’s said, you give him your best smile and press your forehead to his.

You breathe a calm breath before speaking calmly. “You don’t have to battle this on your own,” although you’re trying to comfort him, your voice shakes. “I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere.”

“But dreams,” he tries to interrupt.

“Dreams don’t always predict the future, my love. But they can show what you’re afraid of or feelings you have deep down. So please, go to sleep, Haitham. I promise I’ll be right here.”

*****

Alhaitham wakes with a start. His heartbeat is erratic as his breathing is shallow. His brow is covered in sweat as he struggles to take in his surroundings. He’s in his office, arms full of your sleeping body. You’re slowly stirring awake as Alhaitham tries to catch his breath. His grip on you starts to get tighter as the memories of his dream are still replaying in his mind. The pads of his fingertips desperately grip your clothes to make sure you’re real, alive, and breathing.

Your voice is laced with sleep as you sit up on the couch, “hey baby? Haitham, calm down.” You run a hand though his hair to bring him back.

Alhaitham starts to slow his breathing as he sits up fully, facing away from you. As soon as he calms down, he mumbles, “it finished. I know how you die. And it’s my fault.”

Your eyes widen and you’re fully awake. You hug him from behind as small tremors wrack through your lover. “I couldn’t save you,” he begins, “it’s my fault you got taken. And the last thing you said to me was I love you. How? How can you love me? You died because of me.”

You turn him around and wipe the sweat from his brow. A few tears have fallen from his eyes as the vivid dream replays in his mind. You cup his face and draw circles on his cheeks. “Alhaitham, I love you and I’m not leaving you.” You kiss his lips softly. “It’s just a dream and you haven’t done anything to me to hurt me. And I promise you, if the end of the world comes,” you kiss him again, “I’ll be next to you. Giving you the warmest of smiles.” You give him a grin then, hoping he’ll see and feel the love you have for him.

Alhaitham breathes calmly as he places a hand over yours, needing to feel all of you as a physical reminder you’re here. He finally finds the strength to meet your soft and gentle gaze as he lifts his eyelids. His heart skips a beat and he leans in for a passionate kiss. You hum happily into the kiss and pull him into your body. Judging by the stars still up in the dark sky, you assume it’s quite early in the morning. With the overtime he’s done, you know the scribe can take a couple days off. With the both of you awake enough, the two of you gather his things and leave a note for the new grand sage alerting him of a break.

Upon returning to your home, Kaveh greets you with a tired smile, the worry easing off of his face. Alhaitham nods at his roommate as you lead him to your now shared room. Alhaitham undresses alongside you as you get ready for bed. He pulls you into his warm taut body, a smile etched onto both of your faces as pleasant dreams over take you.

[best-overplayed-song]

fun facts

lady gaga wrote "just dance" in 10 minutes. She originally wrote it for The Pussycat Dolls when she was working as a songwriter, but they rejected it, so lady gaga released it as her first single

"...Baby One More Time" was written by Max Martin, who is Swedish. He meant for the lyrics to be more along the lines of "hit me up one more time", but didn't speak english fluently at the time of writing

(not-so-fun fact) Britney naturally sings in a lower range, but the producers wanted her to sing with a higher, girlish voice. this is why she often lip-synced on stage. those who have heard her natural singing voice say her vocals are more suited for rock than pop

[radioisntdead]

Buon giorno or Buona notte dearest!!

I have another request heheheh

Think of this : Angel and the gang go out for another trust exercise, and they see an add for one if m!readers concerts.

Since Angel is a fan, he asks to go with the group as a bonding experience, which Charlie says yes too

They go together, and m!reader is getting ready, when they see Angel and think he's quite cute, not knowing him from his ahem, works and they sing a love song (Heavy metal lover by Lady Gaga) and Angel almost has a heart attack.

(It's mostly the ; 'I could be your girl,girl,girl' part that I get inspired from)

At some point Val starts being a weirdo, and then m!reader publicly shits on him in front of their entire audience, and he leaves after getting taken away by a few of m!readers fans

And it ends happily ever after with them together forever :D

(Readers music vibe is like odetari, ayesha erotica, asteria, etc)

If you could do this, it would make my summer!!

Love

-XIN🌹💝

Good evening my dearest Xin! I had so much fun writing this, my apologies it took awhile to write but I hope you enjoy it!

Backstage passes

Angel dust x M! Reader

Warnings: Valentino gets ripped apart, literally. Reader is low-key like the dazzlings from MLP, also I imagine the reader died via Bell accident like that evil dude from Disney's coco

Song used [I listened to this song so much while writing that it actually made me sick LMAO]

You appeared in hell overnight after dying from an unfortunate and totally not planned stage accident, involving a bell, everything you had worked so hard for gone within a mere moment.

Filled with rage and the confidence of someone desperate to thrive in the spotlight, you began to conquer the music scene of hell.

You climbed the ranks and crushed those beneath you, if you weren't so focused on gaining fame instead of plain ol' power you'd give a couple of overlords a good run for their money.

You captured the attention of hell's finest, sinners and hellborn alike wanted to book you for their events, concerts were sold out within seconds, stan accounts on hell's Twitter servers would beef with those who opposed you, music edits were made of you, memes and clips, mildly disturbing fanfiction was written, you were an icon.

Along with catching the attention of hell's finest, you gained Angel dust as a fan.

Your music would be playing in the clubs he went to, sometimes played during his drag shows, he'd use it as background for whatever thoughts he disassociated away to whenever Valentino was having his way, or he'd just listen to your music when he was alone.

And so when Charlie somehow managed to get the entire hotel front row tickets to your show after he mentioned it's make a good group exercise, he was ecstatic!

The group waited outside, Charlie and Vaggie were trying to secure a place for them in line, Alastor would rather died again then attend so his ticket went to Cherri, Husk had found the bar, Niffty was terrorizing some sinners by cleaning, Sir Pentious was... Sir Pentious-ing Cherri bomb, and that left Angel dust to wonder around until the show began, stumbling into a nearby store to grab some snacks.

You on the other hand sneaked out to go to the convenience store near by the concert venue in full performance outfit covered by an oversized coat and hood just to grab a slushie and a light snack because with all the dancing you were going to be doing, you couldn't do on a empty stomach but not a too full one or you'd puke!

And that's where you saw him, purchasing a couple of things.

You had a little thing for cute things, and Angel dust seemed to fall into that category, for you anyways, for most of hell's people, they usually tended to put him into a more... Exploitive one,

It wouldn't hurt for you to make one of your people drop off a couple of backstage passes for that spider, after your show right?

Or better yet maybe you could do it yourself?

The concert venue was filled with sinners and hellborn alike from all types of backgrounds, all there to see you perform.

Including a couple of overlords.

Angel's eyes bounced around the stage waiting for your arrival.

Soon enough the bright lights dimmed and more colorful ones took their place.

Lights, smoke, action.

Heavy metal lover

Heavy metal lover

Heavy metal lover

It was starting.

Heavy metal lover Heavy metal lover

You came up from a platform under the stage smoke coming out with you as the music began, microphone in hand, and eyes closed shut.

Heavy metal lover

Heavy metal lover

Heavy metal lover

Heavy metal lover

Your eyes shot open as you began to move, background dancers were moving in sync, all eyes were on you.

Heavy metal lover

Heavy metal lover

Heavy metal lover

Heavy metal lover

Dressed in black and neons you practically glowed in the dark atmosphere,

"I want your whiskey mouth all over my blonde south," your voice rang out throughout the venue causing some members of the audience to scream out your name.

You struggled to hold back a filthy grin.

"Red wine, cheap perfume, and a filthy pout," you walked out onto the stage front and center, lights following you in all your leather-y glory, the backstage passes in your sleeve crinkled.

"Tonight bring all your friends, because a group does it better," Angel dust's eyes were locked onto you much like everyone's else's, like they were hypnotized.

"Why river with a pair? Let's have a full house of leather," Oh how you adored being the center of attention, you looked at the crowd, eyes glancing over everyone, a mild shiver of disgust went through you when you accidentally locked eyes with what looked to be a grape flavored moth.

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

You quickly moved your eyes away to continue looking for a certain spider, honestly your attachment to see a sinner you only saw for five seconds tops in a convenience store was interesting.

What was even more interesting was your ability to avoid the explicit ads for the films he did, seriously they were everywhere in hell! Including said convenience store!

"Heavy metal lover,"

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

"Heavy metal lover,"

As you walked across the stage you kept your eyes on the audience,

Searching..

Searching..

And you found him!

Right in the front row, how did you not see him before?

"Dirty pony, I can't wait to hose you down," your eyes locked on him as his locked on yours.

Did that count as a horrible, HORRIBLE pickup line or was that just poorly timed?

"You've got to earn your leather in this part of town," it seems someone hadn't seen the poison music video! You flared out your own leather jacket, the shiny gems on it sparkling in the dark.

"Dirty pearls and a patch for all the Rivington Rebels," you winked at him before turning on your heel as your background dancers circled around you with all sorts of dancing.

"Let's raise hell in the streets, drink beer and get into trouble,"

You danced and your background dancers mimicked in perfect coordination.

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

"Heavy metal lover,"

You began strutting to the center of the stage.

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

You leaned down and went into what I can only describe as a sensual army crawl but without relying on your elbows to crawl.

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

You moved towards Angel dust.

"Heavy metal lover,"

You reached out an arm towards him, gently tugging on his bowtie to pull him closer to the stage, once he was close enough you touched his face, his eyes were wide and his heart was nearly pounding out of his fluffy spider chest, you his all time favorite singer was touching his face.

"I could be your girl, girl, girl, girl, girl, girl,"

Within seconds you moved your arm just enough to loosen the backstage passes from your sleeve and have them fall into your hand.

"But would you love me if I ruled the world, world, world?"

You tucked the tickets into the front of his shirt where his chest fluff was located, being careful not to accidently grope the spider.

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

You gave a wink before flipping yourself onto your back and throwing yourself up and strutting back to the middle of the stage as your performers danced around you.

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Unfortunately a certain moth witnessed your little flirt, with his best pornstar? He didn't think so.

Without alerting the other two Vees who were actually focused on the show itself he marched his way through the crowd.

Heavy metal lover

"Whip me, slap me, punk funk, New York clubbers, bump drunk,"

Shoving audience members to the side, causing some to crash into each other and tumble like dominoes, grabbing the attention of others.

"Bud Light, liquors, bar slam, move it, this is your jam"

Of course that caught your attention, and you didn't appreciate someone stepping out and stealing the attention that belonged to you! That you deserved and worked so hard for!

"Wash the night with St. Jameson, Like a baptism, heavy metal lovers play,"

You took a couple of steps towards the side of the stage where he was.

"Baby, we were born this way''

"Uh oh, it seems a shiny headed purple man is trying to wreck the show! We can't exactly have that now can we?"

You could barely hear whatever words he was saying, in your prospective it was like a grape yappin' away.

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

With a wave of your hand the crowd grabbed onto him, lifting him up and pulling him through, landing him in the cannibal section.

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Grabbing onto his limbs and pulling them apart, teeth were sunk into him pulling at his purple flesh.

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Attention was back on you, as it should be.

No one paid mind to Valentino's screams as if they couldn't hear it or as if it wasn't happening at all, completely and utterly enamoured with you and your music.

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Heavy metal lover

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Neither of the Vee's would notice he was gone until hours after the show, no one would notice the blood scattered on the floor until late at night when they were cleaning up the messes, and no one would know what exactly happened to him until he eventually respawn, having lost everything.

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Heavy metal lover

What a scary power you possessed, even if you didn't completely realize you had it.

But that wasn't the focus here, because as if nothing ever happened you went back to flirting with Angel dust from the stage.

"I could be your girl, girl, girl, girl, girl, girl, but would you love me if I ruled the world, world, world?"

Eventually the show would end, and you'd wait anxiously backstage until that spider came, cashing in that backstage pass you shamelessly gave him from the stage, followed by the princess of hell herself moments later trying to get you to join her hotel.

Heavy metal lover Heavy metal lover, Heavy metal lover

And what else could you do then accept her invitation to join her little hazbin hotel, although you were anything but a hazbin.

And if you did manage to get past the pearly gates, you already had earth and hell alike in a chokehold, imagine what you'd accomplish if you performed in heaven?

Heavy metal lover, Heavy metal lover

It was a good chance to get to know Angel dust as well, the two of you would go from friends to something more.

Heavy metal lover

Friends to lovers was such a a underrated trope wasn't it?

Heavy metal lover

It wouldn't hurt to lean a little more into romantic songs, especially if you went the more cheesy route and played for Angel alone.

Heavy metal lover, Heavy metal lover, Heavy metal lover

You couldn't wait for the chance to shamelessly flirt with him while you were on stage again.

Heavy metal lover, Heavy metal lover

Good evening folks! I hope you enjoyed! I know my posting schedule has been a little wonky [side eyeing the Wednesday angst being posted on Thursdays] my bad, there's some personal stuff going on, plus I've been feeling a little sick but hopefully everything will be a little more organized this week! As always thank you for tuning on in, goodnight!

[jaybirdie421]

Masterlist for songs used in chapter titles:

(TBP- To Be Posted) (TBW- To Be Written)

Book Title: Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God) by Kate Bush

Prologue: What Was I Made For by Billie Eilish

ARC 1

Ch1: Walking on Sunshine by Katrina

Ch2: Made For Me by Muni Long

Ch3: Mad World by Pentatonix

Ch4: Brother by Kodaline

Ch5: Devil’s Train by The Lab Rats

Ch6: Towards the Sun by Rhianna, Charlie’s Inferno/Terrible Things by That Handsome Devil/AXIE

ARC 2

Ch7: Not Like Us by Kendrick Lamar

Ch8: Devil Town by Cavetown

Ch9: Look Who’s Inside Again by Bo Burnum

ARC 3

Ch10: Burning Pile by Mother Mother

Ch11: The Cult of Dionysus by The Orion Experience

Ch12: Nothing’s New by Rio Romeo

Ch13: We Are Young by Pentatonix

Ch14: Spooky Scary Skeletons by Andrew Gold

Ch15: Material Girl by Madonna

Ch16: Blow My Brains Out by Tikkle Me

Ch17: Meet Me At Our Spot by WILLOW

Ch18: Wait A Minute! by WILLOW

Ch19: Dead But Pretty by IC3PEAK, Abbey by Mitski

Ch20: Just Dance by Lady Gaga

Ch21: Sweater Weather by The Neighborhood

Ch22: Let’s Groove by Earth, Wind, and Fire

Ch23: Pocketful of Sunshine by Natasha Bedingfield

Ch24: Take A Slice by The Glass Animals

Ch25: Breezeblocks by Alt-j

Ch26: Ride by Sir-Mix-A-Lot

Ch27: Touch The Sky from Brave

Ch28: Ole Therebefore by Rachel Zegler

Ch29: Rewrite the Stars from The Greatest Showman

Ch30: We Both Reached For The Gun from Chicago the Musical

Ch31: Too Sweet by Hozier

Ch32: Line Without a Hook by Ricky Montgomery

Ch33: Do You Remember The Rain by (?)

Ch34: 9 to 5 by Dolley Parton

Ch35: Jump in the Line/ Dead Mom (Reprise) from BEETLEJUICE the Musical

Ch36: I/ME/MYSELF by Will Wood

Ch37: Double Life by Pharrell Williams (Despicable Me 4)

Ch38: Your Love (Deja Vu) by Glass Animals

Ch39: When Will I See You Again by SHAKKA

Ch40: End of Beginning by Djo

Ch41: Baby Hotline by Jack Stauber (Micropop)

Ch42: I Know The End by Phoebe Bridgers

Ch43: Heat Waves by The Glass Animals

Ch44: Everybody Wants To Rule The World by Tears for Fears

Arc 4

Ch45: See You Again by Tyler The Creator

Ch46: Cloud 9 by Beach Bunny

Ch47: Plage Coquillage

Ch48: Poison from Hazbin Hotel

Ch49: good luck babe! by Chappell Roan

Ch50: Ghost by Confetti

Ch51: Never Be Alone by Shadrow

Ch52: A Sign of the Times by Harry Styles

Ch53: Work Song by Hozier

[squidzure]

HELLO I HAVE SEVERAL QUESTIONS, but first will start with my favorite, musicc You mentioned Albertine likes to sing :D do you have a voiceclaim for her or certain songs you see her singing? I'd love to know how Birdie "sounds"

AHHHHH hi hello thank you for the ask 🩵 i'll stick my answer under read more (i had many thoughts lol... the yapping yapper <- me)

i've actually thought about albertine's voice a lot! i'm pretty enamored by her in-game voice (elezen voice 5 my beloved) because of how deep and (imo) raspy it is, which has made it hard to find voice claims i like lol ;-:

HOWEVER a new candidate has entered the field with the release of dragon age the veilguard! i've found that both the medium and low versions of voice 1 for rook (the player character!) is such a good fit of bertie???

here's an example of the low voice (i ended up just taking the clip myself, say hello to my rook lol) 🙏 these are just the sample vocal clips from the character creator, so no spoilers!

this definitely isn't perfect but it's definitely close-ish to the idea i have in my head!

✄---------------------------

now for songs..... definitely a lot of sea shanties :'D i haven't written here about it too much i don't think, but besides her mother and her performing troupe, the last important part of her life is her adoptive older brother rhea (and his adoptive sea captain father). professionally with the performing troupe i think she spent more time dancing and helping with special effects, but when hanging with the crew at port? songs ahoy :)

loreley by blackmore's night is a song in particular i could see her singing ☺️

and a total random one, but the lady gaga rendition of new york, new york gives such bertie vibes 😭??? i could absolutely see her singing this but i have no reason for why LMAO

[ryttu3k]

Thoughts on Doctor Who - Rogue, which is largely theorising on who the character is! (Yes, yes, I'm a truther for that theory.)

So we got: 1) Kylie and Lady Gaga (and Billie Eilish which I didn't recognise), 2) Dungeons and Dragons (roll for initiative), 3) Libertango!, 4) Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, 5) cosplay, 6) Bridgerton (which, not my thing but pretty important overall), 7) a Shalka reference?? and 8) gay longing.

Oh yeah we're back.

Shades of the Family of Blood with the Doctor wanting revenge for Ruby's apparent death. Dude trapping someone for centuries in an empty barren dimension is worse. That's worse, right? Doctor, babe, you see how this is worse, right?

Love the foreshadowing with Ruby's earrings.

Rogue mentions a new boss and paperwork. I wonder if this is the same new boss that Beep the Meep mentions?

Spent the entire episode trying to work out why the Duchess looked familiar. Took me until the credits to see it was Indira Varma. Welcome back, Suzie Costello!

Who is Rogue?

Fuck it I'm a Master!Rogue truther. The evidence, as I see it:

The name. The Rogue seems quite appropriate for a notorious renegade!

lbr setting up an intrigue involving cosplaying bird aliens for Doctor Enrichment 100% feels like a Master thing to do.

The Kylie. The Master is a Known Pop Music Enjoyer (see: Rogue Traders, Scissor Sisters). Also 'Can't Get You Out Of My Head' is hilariously on the nose for the Master's… everything.

The ship, complete with TARDIS-esque central column and also being a mess.

He lost someone. The ship was made for more than one, and he lost someone.

The Master, gaming, and crit fails.

The TARDIS got grumbly. She, of course, has a history with the Master.

Rogue has to be a time traveller instead of just a human-looking alien from the same time period because. D&D and Kylie weren't around in 1813.

The ring! The ring! Come on!

Arguing across the stars.

So apparently it wasn't just Libertango they were dancing to. At least one site makes mention of the fact that given the rest of the contemporary music in the episode, it was most likely the 1981 Grace Jones song that heavily makes use of Libertango - called I've Seen That Face Before.

Okay so one major thing against him being the Master - more or less sacrificing himself to save Ruby. And that's where I keep coming back to the ring. What if it's something like a chameleon arch? It literally wouldn't be the first time an arched Master became generally more altruistic and caring, it happened in his first story back. Which was, needless to say, written by RTD! (I realise this one was not but he's still showrunner and lbr if he told me, "Hey, do you want to write a Doctor Who episode that references D&D, cosplay, and the return of the Master?" I'd be jumping up and down saying, "UM, YES?" at quite a volume.)

Not necessarily the Master specifically, but 'the one who waits' could be an apt description for someone whose last words to the Doctor were, "Find me."

Like yes there are 100% Jack vibes but also. Look. Look…

Continuity

Another Susan Twist appearance, this time in painting form. We'll be getting the payoff for that next week, looks like!

Ruby mentions some of her past, including the snow, which feels like a significant thing to mention.

Absolutely playing with the stories are real theme here, with cosplayers taking things entirely too seriously, and Rogue's entire Thing being based on D&D.

Season ranking

As of s40e06:

73 Yards

Rogue

The Devil's Chord

Dot and Bubble

The Church on Ruby Road

Space Babies

Boom

[suitmana]

heres a fun question, what songs wld the LGTS cast sing on karaoke night?

ooooo interesting! i'm about to get really self-indulgent

elise is a powerhouse. she loves songs that she can belt or scream at the top of her lungs to. if she wants to show off she'll sing any ado song; ussewa and show are her favorites!! she's perfected the raw anger expressed in its opening lyrics and that gets her so hyped up

freya's music taste is what a lesser man would call "cringe". she unironically loves shut up and dance with me, and her singing is so energetic and carefree that the others get swept up in her infectuous happiness

leb would kill it with anything by lady gaga (i firmly believe that judas was written specifically for her). plus any songs with a playful, almost sensual vibe are her favorites and she can get really, really into it—especially if she's singing with elise. it's tradition for them to duet toxic every karaoke night

rozen would be really good at those slow romantic 40s-60s songs; think doris day and frank sinatra. her voice is perfect for those: soft, melodic, very pleasant and soothing. even if the others may not share her music taste they still cheer her on because her voice is just that nice to listen to

[cuntycassandra]

What songs make you think of your faves?

Ooo this is difficult because my brain is basically a big jumbled mess of songs and story/character relations, and I haven’t made a proper character playlist in a while, but I’ll do my best!!

These are just for my current or very recent faves, and the songs are just the ones I know off the top of my head have correlation in my head.

Alex Summers:

- X Men

These are on vibes alone, not as much storyline

I Saw Her Standing There - The Beatles

Leaving On A Jet Plane - John Denver

Don’t Stop Me Now - Queen

I Know Places - Taylor Swift (shut up I know 😭)

Cough Syrup - Young the Giant

I’ll Stand By You - The Pretenders (this one is specifically a Charles and Alex father-son esque song.)

Monster - Caissie Levy

No Surrender - Bruce Springsteen

Teenagers - My Chemical Romance

The Way I Loved You - Taylor Swift

We Built This City - Starship

Iris - The GooGoo Dolls

I have a lot more on hc based storylines but I haven’t introduced that version of Alex to the public very much yet.

Shout out to You Belong With Me as that makes me think of Alex simply because of Lucas Till, and You Are My Sunshine for being the main plot point in my first Alex fic.

Charles Xavier and Erik Lehnsherr:

- X Men

Andante, Andante - ABBA (Mamma Mia version) (CE)

As If We Never Said Goodbye - Barbra Streisand (C)

Can’t Fight This Feeling - REO Speedwagon (CE)

Confrontation - Jekyll and Hyde (mostly E but could be CE depending on the AU)

Dos Oruguitas- Sebastián Yatra (CE)

Evermore - Dan Stevens (CE)

From Now On - The Greatest Showman (C)

History Has Its Eyes On You - Hamilton (E)

How To Save A Life - The Fray (E/CE)

If This Was A Movie - Taylor Swift (CE)

Just A Man - EPIC: the Troy saga (E)

Knowing Me, Knowing You - ABBA (CE)

Make You Feel My Love - Sleeping at Last (CE)

On My Own - Samantha Barks (C)

Our Last Summer - ABBA (Mamma Mia version) (CE)

Pieces - Ella Henderson (CE)

Slipping Through My Fingers - ABBA (Mamma Mia version) (C)

Somebody That I Used To Know - Gotye (CE)

To Sir, With Love - Lulu (C)

Treacherous - Taylor Swift (CE)

Turning Tables - Adele (CE)

Wild Uncharted Waters - Jonah Hauer-King (CE)

Writing’s On The Wall - Sam Smith (E/CE)

Sebastian Smythe:

- Glee

Some of these will be KB labelled

All You Wanna Do - Aimie Atkinson/SIX

Applause - Lady Gaga

Bad Reputation - Joan Jett

Bad Blood - Taylor Swift

Bejewelled - Taylor Swift

Blackbird - Beatles

A Boy Like That - West Side Story (KB)

Candyman - Christina Aguilera

Crazy What Love Can Do - Ella Henderson + more (KB)

Delicate - Taylor Swift

Gee Officer Krupke - West Side Story

Glad You Came - GCV

How To Be A Heartbreaker - Marina and the Diamonds

I Never Dreamed Someone Like You - Katie Irving (KB)

I See The Light - Tangled

I Want You Back - GCV (KB)

King Of My Heart - Taylor Swift (KB)

Make Me Feel - Janelle Monráe

Paris - Taylor Swift (KB)

Shut Up And Drive - Rihanna

Speak Now - Taylor Swift (KB + B)

Patricia Thornton:

- MacGyver

I don’t think you people understand the chokehold she has on me. She’s barely in the show and yet she has me by the neck with those manicured fingers.

Literally so many songs from Reputation by Taylor Swift

Ready For It?

I Did Something Bad (this one is the most Thornton song that’s ever written)

Don’t Blame Me

Delicate

Look What You Made Me Do

Getaway Car

Dancing With Our Hands Tied

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Okay other than Reputation:

No Body, No Crime - Taylor Swift

Rabbit Heart - Florence + the Machine

Skyfall - Adele

Thumbs - Sabrina Carpenter

Trust In Me - Scarlett Johansson

Yours - Ella Henderson

AHS: James March and Kit Walker:

- Asylum + Hotel

No don’t worry I don’t ship these two. They’re just the only characters I care about besides Sister Jude.

Until I Found Her - Stephen Sanchez (KW)

Insane - Black Gryph0n & Baasik (JPM)

[respectthepetty]

Reading the (Visual) Rainbow 101

Lesson 7 - It Could All Mean Nothing

Because I get so many asks about colors, I decided the best way to celebrate Pride is to educate anyone who is interested in how to better Read the (Visual) Rainbow and simultaneously allow myself to appreciate queer media.

We've ventured through six lessons on how to read visuals in order to understand a piece of media's overall message. We journeyed through colors, barriers, symbolism, and cultural significance, but what if the image is just an image? What if it doesn't have a deeper meaning? What if it means absolutely nothing?¹

¹ It doesn't. An image always tells us something.

Those Darn Blue Curtains

If you've been around the internet in the past decade, you might have heard about some blue curtains.

The joke about the blue curtains demonstrates that sometimes the creator does not intend for an image or an object to be meaningful. Sometimes the curtains are just curtains that happen to be blue.

But that doesn't mean they're meaningless.

Literary Criticism

Literary theories are ways in which we can approach and examine a piece of text. Several literary theories exist. One theory tells us to only look at the work regardless of who wrote it or who the intended audience is (Practical). Another theory demands that we include the culture in our examination of the text (Cultural). And another theory requests we solely look at the formal elements of the text (Formalism) while another theory requires we include ourselves and our perspectives in the analysis (Reader-Response). Many more literary theories exist, and all have also been applied to media. Visual media is different than written text, so these theories have shifted into Critical Media Studies, but much like Literary Criticism, it helps viewers examine and analyze media using different theories.

Critical Media Studies

If we were watching a series that featured blue curtains, depending on which theory we use, we could interpret the message differently.

If the blue curtains don't mean the character is sad (Psychoanalytic Criticism), are the blue curtains making a statement about masculinity (Feminist Criticism or Queer Theory)? Are they being filmed up-close or off-centered to reflect the character's situation (New Criticism)? Or do the blue curtains quickly remind us this isn't a Dutch house (Cultural) because most Dutch houses don't have curtains?

Now, you might be thinking that if the blue curtains could mean any of those ideas, then nothing really matters, but we have to remember that we aren't placing value on these items because their purpose isn't TO BE the story but to merely reinforce it.

Since the blue curtains are there to support the narrative, we have to evaluate if they matter WITHIN THAT SPECIFIC NARRATIVE. Have the curtains usually been open and now they are closed? Did a character spend an unnecessary amount of time talking about them or use them for an odd purpose? Has the color blue been significant to the narrative before we saw these curtains?

If so, it matters to that narrative.

Video Examples

If you watched the two suggested videos from the previous lesson, the first video is Lady Gaga and Ariana Grande's "Rain on Me" and the second is a parody from Japanese comedians Naomi Watanabe and Yuriyan Retriever which means it has comedic elements. Although the parody is well done, we can see the comedy aspect in several scenes such as the singer being showered with dango (sweet rice dumplings) instead of daggers like Lady Gaga was in the original.

The original song is about overcoming tragedy and being grateful to emerge from such an ordeal even though the damage is apparent, something both Lady Gaga and Ariana Grande had to do in very public ways. The original video reinforces the song's meaning by showing Lady Gaga standing up with a dagger in her thigh (the obvious injury) and proceeding to dance in the rain which is symbolic of grief and absolution.

We can analyze the use of feminine colors (pink and purple). We can consider the post-apocalyptic setting. We can analyze the clothing with all of its chains and spikes. We can ponder why at the end, Lady Gaga styles her hair like Ariana Grande's while Ariana Granda leaves behind her signature high ponytail to wear Lady Gaga's hairstyle. We can wonder why the women are in opposite 'worlds' for most of the video, only to merge at the end.

And we can compare the parody to it and see it does an incredible job of parroting these elements. Then, we notice that unlike the original, the comedians don't fully come together because there is a barrier between them.

We must remember that this is a parody, so not every component, if any, is serious. But for the parody to include all the other important pieces mentioned above, why would it exclude the two women's worlds merging when it was very important in the original?

We could reach for a deeper meaning that maybe the parody is commenting on how the two women are still divided by society. We see there are more masks in the parody as well, so perhaps it's making a statement about women's voices being silenced because we notice the masks in the original as well.

But then we have to remember some of the lessons we have learned: lesson one taught us to think about the creator and the context, while lesson six told us to think about the culture and the context.

These videos were filmed in 2020 at the beginning of the pandemic. Precautions such as masks had to be worn to limit the spread of the virus, and different countries had different regulations. Therefore, in the Japanese parody, where both the leads are without masks, a barrier had to be placed between them.

The barrier and the masks aren't pointless though. They tell us about the time period and the circumstances in which the videos were made, but they don't have any effect on the videos' narrative. So although they are meaningless to the plot, they aren't meaningless to our understanding of what we are seeing and why.

So What's Your Point?

Don't look for meaning that isn't there, but don't assume meaning isn't there because you don't want to look for it. When we look for evidence that only confirms what we already believe or find new evidence and interpret it in such a way to support our already existing beliefs, this is considered confirmation bias. We want to avoid being biased, but we also want to avoid being dismissive.

Sometimes, all it takes is a few words into a search engine, and we can find the information we seek directly from the artists themselves. Depending on the medium, maybe the artist spoke about the symbolism during an interview. Possibly the director or cinematographer mentioned a detail during some behind-the-scene footage. Or by chance, someone was brave enough to ask the creators on their social media platforms or during a Q & A session.

For example, if Ayan's hip and thigh tattoos in The Eclipse drove you so crazy that you begged your mutuals to help you figure out what they were only to find a video of the actor stating they are his actual tattoos, you might be upset to learn what the tattoos say had no bearing on the plot BUT you will also learn that the director wanted an actor with tattoos because it visually showed the bad boy persona the character had which is important to the plot.

Nothing is truly pointless, but you don't have to make everything the focal point. Once again, the visuals strengthen the narrative's message; they shouldn't distract from it.

Activity

Using your knowledge from the previous lessons, watch Lil Nas X's "Industry Baby" music video - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UTHLKHL_whs

Think about how the colors, visuals, barriers, group outfits, and cultural elements support the video's overall message.

We will briefly review it in the final lesson on Friday.

[benisasoftboi]

I recently purchased the Teletubbies' official Pride tank top, and it is the funniest thing I own. I do think it's a pretty naked example of rainbow capitalism - the slogan 'Big Hugs Big Love' is neither obviously Pride themed, nor even obviously Teletubbies themed, almost as though it was deliberately designed to not be easily associated with their brand if seen by homophobes in public - so I do feel that I may have contributed to something bad here, but it delights me so much to tell people what, exactly, it is that I am wearing. It's just so bizarre that this brand even has Pride merch.

Although, of course, the Teletubbies do have a long history of being associated with gay people. There have been little incidents, like the Talking Po doll that sounds like its calling you a slur, but the most famous is of course the accusations of Tinky Winky's homosexuality during the late 90s. Tinky Winky is purple, and carries a purse, and has a triangle antenna, which were all seen as signs of the gay agenda by conservative pundits. This was of course denied because it was the 90s, and it was a children's show, and also all of the Teletubbies were meant to be little babies themselves. However, in the modern day, the story is very different - Teletubbies has clearly become more comfortable associating itself with LGBT people, and also the Teletubbies are now canonically grown-ups. We know this because in 2021, the official Teletubbies Twitter account took a break from astrology posts to let us know that the Teletubbies are fully vaccinated against COVID-19, including pictures of the vaccine cards. Setting aside the strangeness of their second vaccine dates being two weeks in the future from time of posting, and also written American-style despite the Teletubbies being British, these cards importantly provided us with the Teletubbies birthday - February 2, 2003. This is, admittedly, also very strange, as 2003 was after the show's original run ended, but it does indicate the Teletubbies are legally adults, and thus, speculating about their sexualities is now on the table.

The Twitter account has never outright stated that Tinky Winky is gay, but they've heavily implied it (for example, saying he was 'Born This Way' in a tweet at Lady Gaga - one of many unsolicited tweets they've made at various pop stars - or a screenshot of his AOL status mentioning how fabulous he is). They also once suggested that Po and Laa Laa are dating, which, if true, would make Dipsy the only straight one. This makes sense to me, as Dipsy's always had issues with toxic masculinity. I had the Teletubbies CD-ROM game as a kid, and in the rolling game (where you had the Teletubbies roll down a hill and bump into various objects to trigger cut scenes), if Dipsy rolled into the pink skirt, he would act disgusted by it and run away. None of the others objected in this way, and would simply wear the skirt and do a little dance - including Tinky Winky. Going by Twitter now, though, Dipsy seems like a really firm ally to his friends, so I think he may have left that issue in 2006, and all the better for it, I say.

Also, I couldn't find a place to mention this, but Noo Noo uses they/them pronouns.

[marypsue]

fic writer self-recs

I was tagged by the lovely and talented @titleleaf!

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favourite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers.

I'm gonna try not to just reproduce the same list from the last time I did this (although I can't fucking find it, so who knows), and also shine the spotlight on some that I think don't get as much attention but that I'm still very proud of anyway!

(But also, the road goes ever on. It's always gonna be the road goes ever on.)

1. house rule #3 (MCU Thor, Avengers [2012])

“Darcy,” Jane says, firmly. “Breathe.” “I am totally breathing,” Darcy protests. “Look, after you offered me the job, she bought us a bottle of sparkling wine and thanked me really cryptically and I basically haven’t seen her since. And in that time, Selvig’s dropped off the map, and a supervillain calling himself Loki who could be her fraternal twin pops up and starts chewing German scenery in a helmet that looks exactly like the one in this book.” Darcy sits back in her chair, bouncing off the back. “Also, I told her about this professor who was a total pain in my ass, and like two weeks later he was on leave for ‘undisclosed reasons’ and he still hasn’t come back.” “This…could all be a coincidence,” Jane says, lamely. “Oh yeah. Same way that weird homeless guy you kept hitting with your car showing up inside that storm was all a coincidence,” Darcy says. “Oh, my god. I’ve been watching ANTM highlights with a supervillain.”

I love Darcy Lewis, I think the narrative voice in this one hits her sense of humour just right, and it makes me astoundingly nostalgic for the early 2010s.

2. definitely not bfu rpf (definitely not Buzzfeed Unsolved/Watcher Unsolved?)

“Even Scully took it seriously when the shadow government gave her cancer, man,” Bryan says, when he sees the glitchy footage. “There – okay, there are two issues with that line of logic,” Zane says. “First, cancer. That’s detectable by current medical science. It’s not exactly a matter of belief. Second, Dana Scully is a fictional character.” “So you won’t get an exorcism?” Bryan says, sounding defeated. “Bryan, my dear, I think you already know the answer to that one.”

Back when the Watcher guys were still attached to Buzzfeed, there was a really popular fandom trope that went around that Shane was secretly a demon. However, nobody seemed to have taken the next logical step - that if Shane was a demon, he wouldn't believe it.

(I don't write RPF, because I tried it and felt weird about it, but I just had to get this written, so I changed everybody's names to something that rhymed with the real-life people's names. Legally Distinct Buzzfeed Unresolved.)

3. Girls In White Dresses (Supernatural)

Mary’s the first to appear in the kitchen doorway, pistol raised, eyes flinty. But she pauses, just for a moment, when she sees Dean, and Jess’ stomach drops. Whoever - whatever - Dean really is, he at least hadn’t lied when he’d said he was Sam’s brother. He’s Mary’s son. And Mary’d just had to watch, helpless, while one of her sons died. Mary’s going to hesitate. But Jess can already tell that Dean won’t. By the way Dean's grinning, she can tell he knows it too.

I had to unfridge some of SPN's many, many freezer-burned women. Also it was so much fun to try to think up ways to hurt all of them emotionally as badly as the show likes to hurt its big strong men emotionally. (Lady Gaga voice) It's equality.

4. i hold with those who favour fire (Crimson Peak)

Perhaps she looks too long. Perhaps her eyes are playing tricks on her, perhaps it is only the lingering warmth of the body melting away the fallen snow, but it seems there are more autumn leaves gathered under Edith’s frozen form, more reds and golds spilling from beneath her nightdress and her hands and her golden head. The leaves flicker and dance, as though caught in a high October wind, though any such wind would be stymied by Allerdale’s protective walls. It isn’t until the hem of Edith’s gown begins to blacken that Lucille sees that what she had taken for autumn leaves are flames.

This one was written for a prompt meme where I asked for a character and a monster/mythical being, and wrote something short connecting the two. I should do that again, that was fun.

5. Boiling a Frog (Rick and Morty)

“It’s strange,” she says, tipping the contents of her cup carefully into the drain under the vending machine’s dispenser and crumpling the cardboard cup in one hand. “None of this feels really...real. Like, Grandpa Rick should be here complaining about how hospitals are breeding grounds for superbugs and how sitting in waiting rooms is pointless because unless you’re a doctor, there’s fuckall you can do to help anyway.” Morty suddenly looks uneasy, but Summer’s not sure if that’s because of what she said or because of the coffee. “I’m glad he’s not,” he says, and then looks horrified.

I broke up with this show when it became clear it was going to wallow and spin its own wheels and suck Rick's dick forever and that at least one of its creative minds genuinely seemed to think that was great and smart and good storytelling and if you didn't love it then you were just too stupid to appreciate his brilliance. But every once in a while the show managed to do something really interesting by approaching something heavy and awful sidelong with absurdist sci-fi and gross-out humour in a way that just worked for me.

I tried to do that here and found out just how hard it is to get a handle on that tone of almost manic energy with total black despair oozing out around all the edges. I think it really turned out, here, and despite no longer having any interest in anything to do with the show, I'm proud of it.

Also, I still love Summer.

I'm going to tag @daddygrandpaandthebeaver, @bixxelated, @marzipanandminutiae, @definitely-not-a-bug, @aquitainequeen, and, as usual, anybody who'd like to do it!

[indie-brokenarm]

You will not be able to gender reconcile, sister. You will not be able to pack it, tuck it or medically block it. You will not be able to find yourself on pills or skin patches and skip out of country for a budget procedure, because the revolution will not be injected.

The revolution will not be injected. The revolution will not be brought to you by academia in four years without off-campus interruptions. The revolution will not be describable with words approved by PC professors and their impressionable youth followers who PrideTM-fully brand themselves 'Queer' with no sense of irony or risk, yet censor terms like She-Male, Tranny, Transvestite and Transgendered. The revolution will not be injected.

The revolution will not be brought to you by the Guggenheim, Whitney, MOMA or Tate, and will not star Jack Halberstam reading Gaga Manifesto then preaching mob mentality by quipping a million people liking Lady Gaga must mean there's something to it. The revolution will not thank wealthy patrons of the arts. The revolution will not make you five pounds thinner, because the revolution will not be injected, brother.

There will be no Iranian government subsidized gender reassignments pushed on men who love men or women who love women just to avoid prosecution as homosexuals under Islamic law. CNN will not predict four Ladyboys satisfying a Thai airline's sexist beauty standards for female flight attendants means equality is at hand. The revolution will not be injected.

There will be no Facebook fan pages about kids shooting hormone inhibitors that stunt their brains. There will be no Facebook fan pages about kids shooting hormone inhibitors that stunt their brains. There will be no pictures of Whitney Houston impersonators being run out of Harlem on a rail with a brand new process. There will be no slow motion or still life of Del LaGrace Volcano pushing a baby stroller through Heathrow in a pink, blue and purple liberation birdsuit that he had been saving for just the proper occasion.

Dancing With the Stars, Ru Paul's Drag Race, Big Brother and Botched will no longer be so damned relevant, and no one will care if Caitlyn Jenner gets a Reebok endorsement to remove her dick on live television while sex workers are in the street looking for a day's pay. The revolution will not be injected.

There will be no Transgender prison inmates raped and attacked by armed guards and convicts after being jailed for defending themselves against bashers about to blow their brains out. The theme song will not be written by Elton John, Stephen Sondheim, nor sung by George Michael, Ricky Martin, Madonna, Melissa Etheridge, or The Village People. The revolution will not be injected.

The revolution will not stereotype all Trans experiences as Trans-Female, Trans-Male, or Transsexual. You will not have to worry about a spouse in your bedroom, Logan Ireland in a tank, or your gender when choosing a toilet bowl. The revolution will not go better with 'T.' The revolution will not fight the prenatal developments that may cause dysphoria. The revolution won't put you in the driver's seat.

The revolution will not be injected, will not be injected, will not be injected, will not be injected. The revolution will be no hormone, children. The revolution will be hard to swallow.

[thelaurenshippen]

this month's mixtape is for Tex Bullock, one of the protagonists of my queer outlaw western (currently drafting). if you subscribe to my newsletter (linked in the previous sentence), then you'll have already read these, but for everyone else, my notes:

This playlist has been public on my Spotify for a while, but I don't think I've ever shared notes for it. Hell, I'm not sure I'd ever written notes for it, though I feel like I must have somewhere, at some point. But, anyway, to catch you up if you're new: Desperate Hollow is my currently unpublished queer outlaw romance. Tex Bullock and Sawyer Watson grow up in a gang together before Sawyer shoots Tex and leaves him for dead. Seven years later, they end up in the same dead-end town and have to deal with everything they've never said. 

The book goes back and forth between their perspectives - and in past/present - but we begin with Tex's perspective, so I thought we'd start with him in the playlists first. Like last month's main story playlist, I made this playlist 1000 years ago and I've found so many songs since that would fit it so much better. But I've kept the original three playlists the same because, even though the characters have become more fleshed out, they've largely stayed the same at their core. 

Tex is the classic Wild West outlaw - he's brash but charming, flirtatious and deadly, roguishly scarred and just the perfect amount of mysterious. And all of that is a carefully constructed persona that he's worked hard to cultivate. In reality, he's gentle with horses, loves a good novel, would happily cuddle Sawyer for hours at a time, and wants so desperately to be loved. He's a murderer, he isn't a good person, but he's a loyal one and very often kind. And he's been in love with Sawyer since he was a teenager. He can forgive Sawyer for shooting him - it's being left that cuts deep. 

1. "The Hell of It Is" - Sam Palladio & Clare Bowen

Yes, this is from the TV show "Nashville". I loved that show. I'm the only person who watched that show. The music slapped. It's all over tons of my playlists (I think the oldest Nashville add to one of playlists was on a Sam/Mark ship mix (if you're a plus pal, it's this one)). This particular set of characters were meant to be a kind of The Civil Wars rip-off and I love how love/hate their lyrics often are. 

The hell of it is/I love you even when I don't - I meannnnnnnn

I'd rather live with my mistakes/Honey say you'll do the same - in the beginning of the story, Tex has been torn between anger and love for seven years. He doesn't forgive Sawyer for leaving him for dead, but at the same time, he'd do anything to have the opportunity to forgive him. He'd rather live with Sawyer and their mistakes than not. 

2. "John Wayne" - Lady Gaga

This song just sounds like Tex to me. In your face, swaggering, a little sexy. Tex is a construct of his own making, an exaggeration of Wild West masculine violence like John Wayne. 

I crave a real wild man/I'm strung out on John Wayne - this is Tex  about himself. He doesn't want a wild man as a partner, he wants to be the wild man. And he needs to be a little enamored with himself in order to keep the construct alive. 

3. "Dress" - Charlotte Sands

This song is the reason the Desperate Hollow novel exists. It came up on one of my discovery playlists and that chorus - Love the way you wear that dress/Making everyone upset/Burning that cigarette boy/Swear to God, I confess, boy - just had me immediately thinking of Tex and Sawyer and the idea of Tex seeing Sawyer goofing off in a dress and being like "oh shit Something is happening". At the time, I was working on the story as a podcast taking place entirely in the present day, so I wrote a little drabble from their years in the gang as an exercise - Tex and Sawyer and the other men going through a haul they'd pulled, all of them trying on various fancy clothes. Sawyer throws on one of the dresses and is laughing and dancing, carefree for the first time since Tex has met him, and Tex is immediately in hell. 

Look so good I'm annoyed - this was the building block for the scene I wrote. Tex is really confronting his attraction to Sawyer for the first time and because, at this point, they do not get along, he's just annoyed by it. It's inconvenient that Sawyer is so smart and capable and also hot. 

So, anyway, I wrote that scene, kept working on the podcast and then...kept thinking about that scene, and how fun it was to write a flashback. And here we are, five years later, and I've got a 150k word novel that cuts between flashback and present day. 

You're so masculine/Taste like cherry cola - the juxtaposition of masculine and feminine in this song is so good and there's nothing inherently about cherry cola, but because of the cherry chapstick in "I Kissed a Girl", my mind just immediately went to that place. 

4. "I Will Never Die" - Delta Rae

There's an unmade playlist in my head that's "songs to crawl out of your grave to" and this is absolutely one of them. Tex is riddled with scars and has escaped death more times than anyone he knows and he just refuses to die. And even though "Dress" is a lot more pop-y, this song is more in line with the aesthetic.

5. "Bad" - Royal Deluxe

Another great little bit of outlaw rock from Royal Deluxe. This is very straightforward as a choice for Tex, but I'm bad, as bad can be/So bad that it's hard to believe/Oh, what they say about me is particularly good for the fact that Tex is all about the narrative of his own legend. 

6. "Raise Hell" - Dorothy

Another extremely self-explanatory one! This is pure vibes. Tex was raised to raise hell, and I'm always going to be a sucker for any talk of sinners in songs of this genre. 

7. "Slow Burn" - Kacey Musgraves

The flow of this whole playlist is not my best work, and we really take a hard turn into love songs here. But if I had to justify my own shitty construction, I would say that it mimics how Tex feels about Sawyer - it's total whiplash all the time. 

This song is so perfect for walking someone home at the end of a date, when there's a nice breeze and the sun is setting. It's the perfect song for falling into the initial infatuation - not love, but the knowledge that maybe, someday, it could grow into that. Tex hasn't had a lot of that kind of softness in his life, but he wants it desperately, and he and Sawyer did have moments that were like that that he holds as precious memories. 

8. "Love Story" - Sarah Cothran

This was originally the last song on this playlist, but I moved things around the more that "Night Shift" became theTex song. 

It's sad-dark Taylor Swift. Like the previous song, this is feeding into Tex's fantasies about what love could be like if he didn't live the way he did and didn't have blood on his hands. Sawyer has always been the storybook prince to him, and it's Tex who doesn't make a good princess (in his mind). 

9. "Night Shift" - Lucy Dacus*

This song makes me so catshit bananas. I could copy down every single lyric. The first time I tasted somebody else's spit/I had a coughing fit is one of my favorite opening lyrics of all time. The whole metaphor of the night shift. The tension between forgiveness and desire. Breakup song of all time!!!

Genuinely, there's so much about this song that is perfect for Tex. The first time I heard the song (which I believe was sent to me by a listener), I was bowled over, because I'd been thinking about the fact that Tex almost certainly pretended he was kissing Sawyer the first time he kissed someone. I was let down, it wasn't the same just kiiiiiills me. That's it exactly! 

And then, the night shift stuff. You've got a 9 to 5/so I'll take the night shift/And I'll never see you again/if I can help it - there's a whole thing in the book about Sawyer as the sun and Tex as the moon, so this really sends me off the deep end. 

In five years I hope these songs feel like covers/dedicated to new lovers - Tex is this way about his own legend and the narrative of his life. After he's shot, Sawyer isn't in his life anymore, so surely Sawyer can't be part of who he is anymore. Except you can't really ever untangle yourself from the people who shaped you and, no matter how much he tries, everything always reminds Tex of Sawyer. 

Don't hold your breath/forget you ever saw me at my best - Sawyer was the only one who really saw Tex's softer side and now that they're apart, Tex would give anything to remove that information from Sawyer's mind. 

Can't lose what you never had - a common sentiment, but one that punches me in the chest when it comes to Tex and Sawyer! 

Am I a masochist, resisting urges to punch you in the teeth...What was the plan? Absolve your guilt and shake hands/I feel no need to forgive but I might as well/But let me kiss your lips so I know how it felt - I'm walking into the ocean. The way that Lucy Dacus puts these different physical acts in the context of forgiveness - not punching you is hurting me, if we shook hands and parted would you feel absolved, would kissing you feel like forgiving you....Lucy, I am in your walls!!!   

p.s.if you want more queer outlaw ramblings, I've got a whole tumblr tag for it!