#writing human proportions is a tad easier

[trashogram]

Would my TP darlings read gijinka’d smut for them?

[sailynthesayaad]

Time to Collect

The morning was already starting out with a tad of annoyance. Adjusting to this new life style was nothing but boredom and strife. People telling her what to do and telling her on that is how it is, as if she knows anything of how any of it all worked. As if she wasn’t getting frustrated with it all herself! A huff would come from the Sayaad as she entered out into the lands of Westfall. Choosing the more flexible form of a worgan as she could least easily use an excuse of two forms, making things a bit more flexible for her depending on the situation. The humans seeming the duller of the races and yet infested the wider range of land. Taking a pause in her step she’d change the form in over to the more human appearance, recalling that ordinary humans were more common in these parts.A hint of discomfort coming over of as she adjusted her proportions, a small grunt coming from her. She favored keeping her piercings on any of her forms, showing off the shining beauties. Keeping the left side of her shaved as well, however she’d left the length grow down a small ways past her shoulder, choosing a range of yellow to red to flow through the hair, going from the front to back as the colour would shimmer in the sun and go with the darker shade of skin tone. Her eyes keeping their Fel green look, but dimming down a bit to least look human. The clothing for today was a fishnet style belly shirt that was long sleeved enough to hook to her thumbs and be pulled a short ways over her hands. A grey tank top that was slightly too big for her laid in over top of the netting, with the words writing in bold black reading; “There’s a 99.9% chance i’m hungry.” A fitting choice she figured. The bottom of the tank top had be cut and frayed in random places to add to her enjoyable ratty looks. A pair of fishnet tights hug in around her legs, some of the holes broken and ripped, a pair of rather short shorts hugged about her hips, they were made of leather and were worn to points and some fraying to the bottoms. A pair of leather boots came up just under her knees, the laces undone but the boots would be tight enough about her shins to keep the tongue in place. She was use to the heat, but it was different here, an odd dryness she wasn’t too accustomed to. She’d aim to make this little trip short.Recalling the first of her meetings with her self calling Master, she’d aim her path in towards the tavern she’d burned down just a few days ago. Having made note that for whatever reasons, mortals tended to enjoy visiting places where devastation took place. To mourn or something. It made so little sense to her. Where go somewhere sad to just cry about something? Obviously that place isn’t safe to visit or go to is something bad happened there. Shaking her head as she went on down along the road ways, she’d smile a bit to herself. Well at least with them being so stupid with such thoughts, it made it easier for her to entrap and ensnare others.  Only a couple hours or so down along the road ways, she’d find herself to her desired location. The tavern still of course still in the shambles of ash and darkened wood as it lay a sad reminder of what was there before. About seven adults were present and three children. The children she defiantly wouldn’t want to bring along, such incomplete things, they’d have to wait till fully grown before she’d honour them with her skills. For now she’d watch and see what was about. Taking in slower paced steps. It seemed the three children were split, two to one woman and one to another. That made some things a bit simpler. Spying over to the other five, they seemed to be workers of some sort, trying to clear out the rumble. “Did they not find the bodies yet?” Pearl would inquire aloud as she found herself by one of the mothers who seemed to jump in surprise in her arrival, jumping slightly. “Ack Light! Ya scured me!” Giving a small chuckle the brown haired woman, in a worn simple dress, apron about her waist, shaking her head. “Ah nah, dey still be at it. Dun eve’ know iffen there be bodies ta find at dis point.” Pearl hated the way many of these people spoke, so many of them spoke so differently too, this common wasn’t so common. For now she’d act remorseful, or what she assumed it to be by giving a small sad smile, “Hopefully something is least found, such a tragic accident.” The other, another brown haired woman who kept it in a pony tail reaching a bit past her neck and wore a similar style dress, who had the two children with her would give a snort. “It’s what ‘appens when ya git a load of men being drunk and stupid together when they shoulda been at ‘ome.” Pearl would chuckle at this and look a bit over to the other woman, “Yeah? Don’t ya think maybe they were here drinking to get away from you?” This species was so annoyingly simple minded, things would proceed just as she had planned. The woman would strike out against Pearl, slapping her across the face nice and clean. Which, logically, Pearl would be allowed to fight back. Proceeding to strike the other in the same manner, this would break out a small fight. The children scurrying back and the obvious more timid woman trying to stop the two of them from fighting, calling out to the men folk over, causing them to drop their tools and gather over. Pearl being the stranger would be looked after by the men, as the woman would go on to collect her children, cussing out at Pearl as the more timid one would proceed to usher her and the children along. Leaving poor Pearl at the mercy of the men as she would feign her painful damsel act. “Oh no, i should have known better.” She’d begin to sniffle, “I knew i shouldn’t have come to see if Charles had been found yet, i should i have known his wife would be here.” She’d lament into a tale of woe and heart break, how she had met this man now lost under the ash and rumble and fallen in love with him only to be taken so soon after meeting.  One man would work on trying to help her with her injuries, another rubbing her shoulders and another trying to say calming things to reassure her, while the other two simply watched on. The three touching her would fall under her spell of seduction within just a few moments, she knew the other two would come along with the right words. The promise of ale and with the other three already under her spell and seeming eager to abandon work and follow in along the other two would fall in line and follow as well. As they were making their way in towards the tower, after a good hour of laughing and chatting with the men happily she’d put the three under her seduction into a trance making them freeze in the spot and turn onto the other two men. “Just knock them out, please.” Pearl would call in a chipper voice to the trio as they went ahead to follow her orders. Human hearts were so weak, simple tugs on their strings, their emotions, it made it so easy for them to just fall in line. “Please carry them for me, i’m such a weak girl after all.” Musing in as they would continue to follow in line. The rest would become simple, bring them up to the top floor of the tower, chain them up and release. The confusion and anger would definitely be her most favorite part of the whole ordeal asides the whole other wonderful fact she didn’t have to look human anymore. Cracking and snapping bones as she stretched out and freed her wings and tail. “Whelp, don’t worry boys. I’ll be back later with your ale and the fun i promised...mostly to myself, don’t you fret now.” She’d smile to the lot, giving a wink before leaving them to settle into their new bindings.

[unnameablethings]

I’m not sure what lyrics would translate well into a story, but The Tailor of Enbizaka is a really cool song. I’m partial to Oktavia’s cover! Maybe you could write something for that?

(That is a cool song! It’s a story in its own right so I’ll definitely have to take some lines out of context or else I’ll just be rewriting the story, lol. Here’s the lines I’m picking, from the chorus:

“But as always, “Concentrate,” I say and stay working/Scissors clutched tightly while I cut deep into the deed.”)

The scissors clack through calico and Carolina bends over her work with the single-minded precision of someone avoiding a bad dream. Keep the line straight, smooth, clean. There, a curve of the blade, and another - a detail too fine to cut now, cut around it, she’ll go back and fill it in later. There, a hand is taking shape, there a leg, a head and a body. Not precisely of human proportion, but close enough for magical purposes. 

There. One outline. Flip it over, lay it on the cloth, cut around it again for a matching set. Carefully, but quickly. She does not have much time. Then the stitching, and the stuffing, rags and cotton and thick, coarse thread. A stitched face, a swiftly-made little dress, a braid of yarn. Little button eyes. 

It’s Annie Baker, or as close as Carolina can do on such short notice. Close enough, she hopes. She slices open the doll’s mouth with a quick jerk of her thread ripper, a small gash, and then slams out the door, sprinting across the street as fast as she can. The Bakers clear out of her way when they see her coming. Annie’s mother, Hannah, is crying, and Carolina’s heart catches in her throat as she pounds up to the sickroom. She went as fast as she could, please-

Annie is still in her bed, and sickly, and for a moment Carolina crumbles, but then the little chest rises and falls, and Carolina pulls out the doll, holding it as close to Annie’s face as possible. 

“Breathe,” she orders. “Blow as hard as you can, for as long as you can.”

Annie obeys, sluggishly, wheezing into the doll’s cut of a mouth. The first breath is barely anything. Annie struggles to try again. Carolina finds that she’s slowed her own breathing to match, heart pounding. Breathe. In, and out, and each breath - a little easier? Just a tad? 

The doll grows hot and feverish under Carolina’s hand, and Annie’s chest starts to move more strongly, her breaths lasting for a count of five each way, then seven. Color slowly returns to Annie’s cheeks, and she blinks, vision clearing. 

“Keep breathing,” Carolina says, although she wants to cry. And Annie does, until finally Carolina can’t hear her chest rattle, and when she puts a tentative hand to Annie’s forehead, it is as cool as her cheeks. The fever is broken. Carolina whips out a needle and thread and stitches the doll’s mouth shut as fast as she can. The doll is pale, bloated, hot to the touch, its button eyes cracked and glazed. Carolina nods at Annie’s mother to come in, and carries the doll back home. 

“Thank you,” she tells it, and puts it in the cupboard, with rows and rows of other dolls with stitched-shut mouths.

[fountainpenguin]

The TV Tropes Trivia page for "The Fairly OddParents" says Birch Hartman once had an idea for a film that was never made. Timmy, feeling sorry for all the other kids Vicky babysat, would wish that every child has a fairy godparent. Because Vicky was under 18, she would also get a godparent - Jorgen Von Strangle. And with fewer fairies to stop them, the Anti-Fairies and Pixies would take over. What do you think? Would Amity allow this? Would Timmy's wish brainwash them so that Vicky seemed nice?

Aww, seriously? I got cheated out of seeing Pixies? Dude, that’s so lame.

The obvious problem here is that it’s been established in show canon that there are not enough godparents for every child. Some fans seem to believe the number of Fairies is 81,000 because that’s how many could fit in the stadium in “Temporary Fairy”. My assumption was that it was just how many fit before it reached capacity, so I personally upped the count a tad.

I did some math last year to figure out how many Fairies were alive during H.P.’s time, and came up with about 7,000 (By the time Wilcox is born, that’s less than the population of Faeheim alone, which bothers H.P. a lot and gives him old people feels). Taking into account the rates they reproduce (including fairies not having babies after Cosmo), this is proportional to how many humans were alive in the time period parallel I set him in.

Unfortunately I tossed that math thinking I wouldn’t need it anymore, and I don’t remember WHAT time period it was and can’t be bothered to work it out right now, but there were dirt floors covered with straw, people mainly used curtains instead of doors, living rooms and kitchens were typically combined into “keeping rooms”, and a firepit in the middle of the floor (not over by the wall in a fireplace just yet) was the main source of light (Candles came much later- lanterns were only for genies for awhile).

Note: I tried to keep Fairy technology advancing at the same general pace human society did, though of course Fairies live longer. H.P. has seen people write with clay tablets, engrave on metal, use ink and parchment, and type on paper. It took them longer than humans to figure out papyrus because it’s not available in most areas of the cloudlands.

ANYWAY, I ended up having like 86,909 Fairies alive. They’re just not a people who reproduce very quickly. Actually, since edibles have to be grown on Earth, there have never been too many Fairies who farm. It was actually the people who were rich enough to survive on Earth who claimed the farms first (they could afford transport costs of goods to and from the cloudlands); thus, it did not benefit the poorer populations to have larger families who could work the soil. Unlike humans, the Fairykind had the option of looking to Alien societies when they built their own. The idea of rent sprang up very quickly. It behooved poorer families to have fewer kids so they could save money.

Worldbuilding tangent: Those of us ladies in first-world countries are usually anticipated by society to become mothers; raising children is seen as one of the most important things a woman can do in her life. 

Not so in Fairy society! The Fairykind can only gain nutrients, fill their hungry stomachs, and even get most taste from food not touched by magic- aka, food grown in Earth dirt that hasn’t been tilled with magic-made tools. This is why they settled the cloudlands around Earth to begin with, and not around some rocky planet that couldn’t support life.

However, even with the expanses of the Earth before them, food has always been a limited resource. Ergo, society promotes the idea that parenting is more of a leisure activity, and you shouldn’t have kids unless you know you can afford them. A homeless or struggling Fairy with kids is viewed even more negatively than a homeless or struggling person without kids (particularly with the way Fairy menstrual cycles work, b/c many subspecies have “breeding seasons” and stuff that marks their fertility, and at other times - for decades or centuries at a time - they could mate as much as they wanted without the risk of pregnancy. As a result, “accidents” are viewed by outsiders in a very “Wow, your parents are either really stupid or really hormonal” kind of way.

The subspecies lower on the ladder are constantly “always fertile” like humans; hence, why they’re on the bottom of the ladder. Remember that Cupid’s family line are the ones who designed the social ladder in the first place; they based it off cycles like this. Obviously, they are more prone to accident babies, and more prone to struggling, and they continue to be cast in a bad light by society.

And yes, Praxis deliberately tried to cast Ambrosine into the struggling position when he cut off his funds after Ambrosine had H.P. as a teenager- and Ambrosine put H.P. in the same scenario when H.P. had his third kid and there was still no supportive mother in sight.

Do you see where I’m going with this? Promote the idea that status can only fall with marriage and not raise a lower-ranked person up, and ta-da! The Fairy caste system is in place and keeps the power in the hands of wealthy fairies- families who tend to marry cousins to keep their wealth in the family. A poor full-blooded fairy is technically still ranked higher than, say, a rich elf on a legal level where inheritances and things are concerned. In personal interactions, not so much.

Compare this with Anti-Fairy society, which places a heavier focus on family loyalty- if you choose to keep the kid. In Anti-Fairy society, you basically have the right to give up the kid at birth since you had to have the kid if your counterpart did, whether you wanted to or not. Antis dumping their kids in the middle of nowhere is the stereotypical exception rather than the rule, and used by Fairies when they want to paint Antis in a bad light. In reality, Anti-Fairy society has systems in place where you can take pups, and other Antis who want kids but are infertile because their counterparts haven’t had any can adopt them. 

However, if you choose to accept the kid and you begin spending resources on it, then this idea of family loyalty comes into play, because bats roost in colonies, see. It’s a very, “I didn’t HAVE to keep you, but I did, so don’t you dare make me regret this by dishonoring the family name we’re risking for you” kind of thing. With these family ties in mind, if a teenage Anti-Fairy parent kept their kid, it would reflect poor on the teen’s parents for not stepping in to help them raise it. Raise, yes- politics are a different story sometimes.

SO! This idea of parenting being a leisure activity for Fairies contributes to A) Fairies not rioting when they couldn’t have kids anymore, and B) Their population being small.

What were we talking about again? Oh yeah. Family size, the Fairy population, and Amity. Sorry.

86,909 Fairies alive in my headcanon at the time of “Jimmy Timmy Power Hour”. There are more human kids than that. If this wish affected the entire world, this means that even Fairies who haven’t been trained to be godparents would get sucked into this.

Realistically, this is a wish that the Fairy Council would never allow, and it should shut down Cosmo and Wanda’s wands. You would think this would be one of the very first additions in Da Rules, because it could seriously screw up society and cause unnecessary stress, panic, and chaos.

So it’s not so much Amity having a say in whether this wish is okay or not, though they would be the ones to decide which fairies get which godchildren, and it would a be a rush job so they wouldn’t study personalities first. The godparents they have on file probably have personality details written that they could glance at, but they don’t have time to evaluate ALL the Fairies. In fact, they probably wouldn’t have time to evaluate all the kids: Hence, Vicky may have slipped through the ranks there. 

Odd that she’d end up with Jorgen. Jorgen’s position as Keeper of Da Rules is pretty important, so you’d think he and the Council would be the absolute last resorts, and Amity isn’t allowed to assign them without their permission. I suppose they would have said, “This is important, so I’ll volunteer”, and Amity assigned them to the first kids to come up. In which case, Jorgen and the Council likely would have been “brainwashed” by the wish in the same way they were by the Secret Wish (and they’d probably treat it as seriously).

Of course, things would be a little easier on Amity if the wish only affects Dimmsdale (especially if Timmy just wanted all the kids who had been bullied by Vicky to get godparents). In theory, Fairies (and Anti-Fairies) who have passed their certification classes and been licensed to be godparents apply to Amity in the hopes of being assigned to a child. So, when Timmy makes the wish, Amity would simply take all these certified newbies and assign them to godkids, and possibly make certification classes easier, or even offer temporary certification to students “because this is an emergency”.

Still, there is a godparent shortage going on right now, and evidently has been since “Temporary Fairy”. Jorgen said in “The Big Fairy Share Scare” that Fairies simply weren’t pursuing godparenting as a job anymore- probably because you have to pass all those tests and you get paid by commission; you’re out of luck if your kid loses you and you don’t get assigned to another one for years. 

Additionally, after the ban on fairy babies was lifted when Poof was born, many fairies are entering that age where they’ve accumulated sufficient funds to support themselves and are looking for leisure activities (or otherwise taking advantage of this opportunity for parenthood in case the window of opportunity closes again). They’re interested in settling down and raising families. There are only so many times you can be ripped away from a godkid before you begin craving something more permanent. 

Cosmo and Wanda are a team and had been with Timmy for many years; they were confident in their ability to raise Poof while still being his fairies (though we know this was rough on Timmy at first during Season 6). Some other godparents, after losing their kids, probably decided to take some time off. Fairy World is having a baby boom right now, so to speak. If Timmy made this wish for all the kids to have godparents, then these godparents would definitely be ordered back onto the field. Retired experts are first in line, before hopeful newbie fairies (or dust forbid, Anti-Fairies) are approved for work.

If this movie ever does get made, I’ll have to debate over whether or not I consider it canon. I’ll probably say, “It’s canon, but depending on the number of kids who get fairies, you may need to pretend that each godparent is assigned to multiple kids, except Jorgen because he does what he wants”.