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biotic-boshtet · 3 years ago

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I posted 9,958 times in 2021

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For every post I created, I reblogged 170.7 posts.

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Longest Tag: 140 characters

#this is my near miss shakarian chapter dedicated to how many times ive gone through the reach and flexibility convo to almost romance garrus

gotta toss in a friendly page break bc my top 5 posts are all fic and i dont want a do you love the color of the sky length post to scroll through

My Top Posts in 2021

“We’ve been by each other’s sides for years, you think I’m gonna leave now?” for Norah and Kaidan

thank you SO much!!!!! my first thought was the cutscene in the final push, where Shepard sends Kaidan away and I almost went for All The Angst. but then my second thought bust through that like the kool-aid man, and here we are, with All The Fluff

Norah Jean sighs when she hears the knock on the bedroom door. She knows exactly who’s on the other side of it. She can feel him. Not listening to one of her few requests on their wedding day. She smooths down the white satin, grabs her crutches and makes her way over to the door.

“Kaidan, I am not asking anymore. Go away.”

“We’ve been by each other’s sides for years, you think I’m gonna leave now?”

“Yes.” Norah Jean sighed and patted the door.

“Sugar, that’s the most ridiculous thing you’ve said all day.” She could hear him thunk his head against the offending piece of wood between them.

“I’m not being ridiculous, Kaidan, its bad luck.”

“C’mon Norah Jean, we got married four years ago, if I see you in the dress now, I really don’t think it’ll have any impact on the rest of our lives. Its an old superstition, that’s all. I just wanna come in for a minute, please?”

“Honey.”

“Don’t you “Honey” me, Norah Jean, just a little peek. And maybe a kiss, and then I’ll go, I promise.”

“Nope.” She pops the ��p’ and thinks the conversation is done, stepping away from the door.

“I miss you.” Kaidan’s voice isn’t as insistent now. “You left before I got up, and I just-“ She hears him puff out a sigh. “I don’t know. I don’t have cold feet, but I’m a little nervous.”

“It was a lot easier when it was you, me, and an Asari Elvis, huh?”

“Nothing fancy, just us in sweatpants and tank tops, middle of the night, wondering if it out be out last chance at happiness. One night alone, one night with our friends, and then right back into the thick of it. It was a good call, tying the knot like that.”

“Oh, but our parents were so thrilled. I loved Elvis, but not waiting to do it “right” is what got us in this mess in the first place.” She made useless air quotes around the word ‘right’, even though Kaidan couldn’t see them.

“Its not a mess, and you’re having fun.”

“No, it is a mess, its overwhelming and exhausting, I may enjoy it right now, but quote me on this, I never want to plan another wedding again.”

“So…... Let me in?” The smile on his face is plain in his voice.

Norah Jean pauses, thinking. Then she unlocks the door. “Okay. One kiss, but you have to keep your eyes closed.”

“Okay, okay, eyes are closed.”

“Tightly?” She could feel his field zinging with excitement.

“Tightly.”

“Good.” She tugs open the door, creaking on its old hinges. Looking Kaidan up and down she’s a little breathless. “Damn, Kaidan, you look good, and you’re not even fully dressed.”

“Hey, no fair, if you can look, I should be able to!”

She puts a hand over his eyes before he can open them. “Ah, ah, ah, no rule about seeing the groom.” Norah Jean tugs Kaidan over the threshold and pushes the door shut with her free hand.

“You’re a hard woman to please, you know that Sugar?”

“Oh hush, and c’mere.” She slowly took her hand away, making sure his eyes were still closed, and grabbed his shirt, gently tugging him down to her level. “One kiss, Kaidan, then you have to finish getting dressed.”

“I think I can live with that. Maybe.”

She tugs him a smidge closer and plants a firm kiss on his lips. And that one kiss turns to two, which turns to three. Before they realize it, Norah Jean’s backed Kaidan to the edge of the bed, his hands on the zipper of her dress and her hands in his hair. She hears his soft gasp as he sits and opens her eyes to catch the look on his face. Love, plain and simple, in his eyes and the grin on his face and in the little breathless laugh that leaves him.

“God, you’re beautiful. I’m a lucky man, Norah Jean.” He sniffs, resting his forehead against hers.

“No, no, no, don’t start that, you’ll make me cry too, and it’ll ruin my makeup.”

“We can’t have that.” He sniffs again. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too, Kaidan, to the ends of the galaxy.” She brushes a tear from his cheek and kisses his nose.

He lets out another breathless laugh. “Look at us, saviors of the galaxy, sappy crying on our wedding day.”

“C’mon, Hon, lets get you dressed. We might have to fix your hair too.”

33 notes • Posted 2021-08-12 16:38:42 GMT

1, 6, and/or 11 for the prompts?

ok i have 1, but 6 and 11 will maybe come eventually so keep an eye out and tysm for the prompts

Aftermath

“I’d ask if you were ok, but the answer seems a little obvious.”

“Yeah, nope, nope, no. Doing bad.” No blood. No screams. Just the wind over the sand and a dead thresher maw. She clenches her fists in the sand and works on getting her breathing under control.

“Don’t worry, Alenko’s on his way over with his kit. Sent me with a full canteen though.”

“Thanks, Garrus.”

“Don’t mention it.”

Shepard rolls off her knees to sit in the sand, taking the canteen from him. Sticking it between her knees, she lifts her shaking hands to disengage the seals on her helmet, taking it off and letting it fall to the sand. She took a deep breath, trying to block out the scent of acid and blood. Only half of those smells were real. The stench of thresher maw acid almost makes her gag as she takes a sip of lukewarm water.

“Hey, I brought backup.” Kaidan’s knelt down in the sand next to her, rifling through his kit till he finds what he’s looking for. A juice pouch and a granola bar.

“I’ll see if I can’t get the Mako up and running, if you two have everything under control here?”

“Yeah, Garrus, we’re good.” Kaidan gives him a thumbs up, and Garrus makes his way back to the Mako.

She takes the offerings with a mumbled thanks, downing the juice in about 5 seconds, hands still shaking. “Sorry you had to see that.” She kept her eyes trained on her hands as she tore open the granola bar.

“Don’t be. You may have put on a more, uh, spectacular display than I’m used to seeing, but I have seen it before. And I know how to work with the aftermath.”

“Not your first 2.5? How lucky.”

“Yeah, we had two of them on the Shanghai, the most I’ve ever worked with other biotics. They uh, butted heads enough to set each other off, so we had to keep them separate or distracted on ground missions. Didn’t wanna risk wrecking more equipment. Kimball ended up getting reassigned to the Fuji a year or two back, but Benton’s still there, I think.” Kaidan was sitting next to her in the sand now. “One time they got into this argument, I don’t even remember what it was about, but Benton was pissed. Next thing we knew, Kimball and I were tossing up a barrier to cover the rest of the squad, because everything unfortunate enough to not be bolted down was flying through the air. Ripped a door right off the Mako, thankfully he didn’t have the juice to pull the whole thing. That one was fun to explain to the captain.”

That gets a laugh from Shepard. “I can only imagine going to Anderson and telling him we need a new door for the Mako, or worse a new Mako.” She crumples up the granola bar wrapper, shoving it in a suit pocket. “God, it feels like I was fighting off that meltdown all day.” She lets her knee fall against his, plating clacking together.

“You good?”

“Be better once we’re off this fucking rock.” This place was a dead ringer for Akuze.

“Well, I’m glad you don’t have to ask the captain for a new Mako, at least.” He grabs her helmet and gets up, shaking sand out of the joints of his suit, and offers his hand to help her up. “C’mon, let’s go see if Garrus has made any progress yet.”

Prompt List

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23 notes • Posted 2021-04-20 08:19:00 GMT

“I don’t know if I want to yell at you or kiss you.” for Norah Jean and Kaidan

cogratatualtions you get an argument! and Garrus being awkward bc he enabled Norah Jean's recklessness!

“I know what you’re thinking, and no. You’re not doing it.”

“Kaidan, you have no clue what I’m thinking.”

“Bullshit, Sugar, you’re thinking of charging over and digging me out of this corner before that Brute notices me.”

“Huh, no, I actually was thinking about how much this hole in my arm fucking hurts. But now that you mention it, that is a great idea.” Norah Jean isn’t so sure the sarcasm comes across through her grit teeth.

“Don’t you dare. I can get myself out of this and you are going to sit tight and stay down till I can get there to help you.”

She gets quiet as she listens to the gunfire, watching her HUD as enemy signatures slowly close in on Kaidan’s position. Her biotics respond involuntarily to her rising stress levels, flaring up and settling down with the breathing she’s forcing steady. The hardsuit’s medical suite’s already done all it could without medigel, which really isn’t all that much. Applied pressure and tried to dose her with painkillers. Immobilized the entire arm. An error message flashes on her screen, “AUTOMATIC INJECTION SYSTEM ERROR”. She got half a dose. Maybe. Great good all of it does her when the medic is pinned down across the field.

“Norah Jean, I can see you glowing from up here, you’re not planning something stupid, are you? I did hear Kaidan to tell you to stay put, and correct me if I’m wrong, but he does outrank you now, right?” Garrus’s voice crackles over their private channel.

“Y’know, I wasn’t planning anything, but Kaidan gave me a lovely idea, though now my window is gone. Not sure how long my suit can keep me from bleeding. Painkillers are kicking in, kind of. I think the biotics are kicking into meltdown mode.”

“What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking of something really stupid.” She watches a handful of husks fall to Garrus’s rifle, then focuses on Kaidan’s hiding spot and the cluster of mutants around it. Her shields were nearly recharged. Kaidan fells a husk and ducks back into cover. The Brute swings its head towards the sound of Kaidan’s pistol and takes a single step.

“If you tell me, I might be able to help, I promise I won’t tell on you. You know, unless it’ll definitely kill you. Then I’ll tell Kaidan.”

“I might, uh, I think I’m gonna charge the Brute. If it gets Kaidan I’m as good as gone, its still too hot for Steve to get in here. But if I distract it before it charges at him? Maybe even catch it off guard and get a few good hits in? You can cover my back while I deal with it.”

“That’s a terrible idea.” Norah Jean can imagine perfectly the face he’s making, mandibles slightly flared, eyes squinted, doing mental math. Ruthless calculus. “It might just work.”

“He’s almost out of ammo, and he’s exhausted. After he’s out he won’t be able to keep up the biotics for long. Kaidan’s a sitting duck. I’m doing it.” The brute scratches a foot on the dirt, snorting. She overrides the medical stabilization lock on her right arm joints.

She flicks over the squad channel.

“Bombs away, boys.”

Norah Jean charges before Kaidan can ask what she means.

Time slows down. A husk in her path falls before she can touch it. The Brute gallops towards her and her heart pounds in her ears. Her arm throbs. She isn’t even fully out of the charge before she’s overloading her barrier as she’s slamming into the creature. Her helmet goes dark in an effort to protect her eyes from the resulting flash, and her shield generator is screaming warnings at her. But her shotgun is in her hands and the Brute is still on the ground. The kickback is worse than usual, but she usually doesn’t get shot either. The Brute doesn’t get back up.

She charges one more time, slamming herself into the Marauder that made its way behind Kaidan’s cover. It goes down with a well-aimed shotgun blast before Kaidan can even blink.

“Norah Jean, I don’t know if I want to yell at you or kiss you.”

She opens her mouth to respond, then sways on her feet. The shotgun hits the dust. Kaidan reacts.

Norah Jean blinks and she’s sitting with her back against the rocky outcropping, Kaidan tinkering with a panel on her suit. His kit is open on the ground beside them. She hears a snick and within seconds she has of a full dose of pain meds. She could cry with relief.

“Heyyy, Honey.” Her voice cracks as she leans her head back against the rock looking at Kaidan.

Kaidan glances up at her, then back down at the portion of plating he’s working to remove. “What the hell, were you thinking, Norah Jean? I had it covered.” He gets the plate off. “Steve’s on the way, ETA is about 5 minutes.”

“Couldn’t let you get killed.”

“Right, so you nearly kill yourself instead, thanks.” The medigel is cool and tingly when Kaidan applies it. “Do you even know how hard you hit that thing?”

“Wasn’t really thinking about it.”

“Yeah, I could tell. Your suit clocked the impact at almost 1000 newtons. Then a third of your systems did a hard reset, and a handful of others just fried when you burned your barrier. Shields barely held through the blast, then failed the second you hit the Marauder. You’re lucky you already had your gun out, or we’d also be dealing with a point-blank gunshot wound.”

Norah Jean didn’t even try to defend herself; he was right. The stunt she’d pulled was stupid and reckless on a normal day, but she’d do it again, countless times, for Kaidan.

“And I’ve taken away your joint lock override privileges until further notice.”

“That’s fair.”

Garrus finally joins them, sauntering over as he collapses his rifle and slings it onto his back.

“Did you know she was going to do that, Garrus?”

“I didn’t not know that she wasn’t not going to do it?” His mandibles twitch nervously.

Kaidan stares at him.

“I plead the fifth.” The turian looks around Kaidan to Norah Jean, stage whispering, “Did I use that one right?”

She winks and gives him a shaky thumbs up.

“Unbelievable.”

16 notes • Posted 2021-08-15 22:50:45 GMT

Aftermath - Chapter 3

hellooooo friends, lets continue my trend of updating at godawful hours of the morning

Read on AO3

Start from the beginning

Waking up, Shepard wonders for a second if she dreamt it all, but then she feels Kaidan’s field against her own, gently fizzling. One of his legs is caught between her own. He’s somehow wrapped up in the entire comforter. She relishes in the feeling of just existing next to him for a moment, then he shifts and rolls over, scooching close so he’s pressed against her back, wiggling of the covers to just enough to drape an arm over her waist as he presses a kiss to her shoulder.

“Mmm, good morning.” Norah Jean feels his voice rumbling through him almost more than she hears it. Only one hearing aid is on and it’s pressed into the pillow.

“G’morning,” She readjusts so she’s laying on her back, Kaidan resting his head on her shoulder now. She tugs at the blanket he’s still burrowed into. “You stole the entire comforter overnight.”

“You weren’t using it.”

“So?”

“So, I put it to good use, its cold as hell in here.” He settles down deeper into the bedding.

“It is nice in here.”

“Right. I was getting flashbacks of Noveria while I was trying to fall asleep.”

“Oh please, it’s not that bad.”

The comm system crackles and they both glance up at the speaker on the ceiling.

“Up and at em, Norah Jean! We’re 10 minutes out from the Mu relay. Might wanna head up here.”

The channel clicks closed before she can respond. Norah Jean hides her face against Kaidan’s hair for just a moment, before sighing and rolling out of bed.

“So, do I get to call you Norah Jean now?” Kaidan sits up in bed, rubbing his arms, content to watch her in the dim light for now.

“If you want, preferably not around the rest of the crew, not if we’re gonna keep this quiet.” She gestures to the general space between them as she pulls on a t-shirt. Almost immediately, she pulls it back off, throwing it at Kaidan. “That one’s yours.”

“Joker calls you Norah Jean, always wondered about that.” He finally gets out of bed, shuffling around looking for the clothes they’d left scattered around the room.

“Close friends and family. He’s both.” Norah Jean tosses another piece of his uniform at him, this time hitting him square in the face, making herself giggle. She’s standing in front of the mirror, fingers staring to comb through her hair, then swiftly braiding down its length. Pins sticking out of her mouth, she carefully winds the braid into a flat bun, pinning as she goes until its completely secure.

“Y’know, that is mesmerizing to watch. Almost as fun as finding all the pins to take it down again.” He’s sitting on the desk, tugging on his boots.

“Maybe you can put it up next time, see if you can get the bun within regulation.” Finishing the last button on her uniform shirt, she tucks her it in and fastens her belt.

“I think I’ll leave that one up to you, you’re the expert.” Boots tied, he made his way across the room to her, wrapping his arms around her waist. She stood still for a moment, cleaning up her eyeliner. He rested his head on hers, eyeing her reflection. “God, you’re beautiful.” He paused a moment, grinning. “Norah Jean. Yeah, that’s good. I like that.” Hearing her name from his mouth sounded so right.

She turned around in his arms, standing on her toes to press a kiss to his lips. “We should go.”

“Mhmm, maybe just one more.” His hands cup her cheeks, and he kisses her slowly, savoring every second he gets.

Then the two of them walk out the door and pretend to be nothing more than friends while they try to save the galaxy.

She’s alive. She’s alive and everything hurts. She shifts and immediately freezes; white hot pain blocks every coherent thought. Alarms wail in the distance, she focuses on their sound, breathing through the pain. Most of the debris missed her on the way down. She’s not pinned under anything; she just hurts like hell. She shifts slowly, black spots dancing in her vision, working her way to a sitting position. She moves her left leg, and the pain comes again, this time she can think enough to pinpoint the source. Her knee is wrecked, probably. But it sure hurts like a bitch.

One more try. Gotta be worth one more try. She grips the low wall of a garden bed behind her as she tries to get to her good foot.

Tries.

The more she moves the more she hurts. Can’t even fucking breathe right around the shooting pain in her ribs. Swearing, she let herself sink back down to the floor. Somebody’ll find her. Eventually. Probably.

After two weeks of debriefings and medical paperwork and an official Alliance investigation, she was finally free. She’d been put on a week of mandatory shore leave, along with the rest of the Normandy’s Alliance crew. Looking around the courtyard, she spots Kaidan, just where he said he’d wait, and she’s making her way over to him. He looks up from his omnitool with a smile as their fields intersect.

“Hey, Norah Jean.” He gets halfway off the bench when she grabs his shirt and kisses him senseless, crutches falling to the ground. He reacts almost immediately, one hand sliding around her waist and kissing her back, oh so slowly, calming her frantic pace. When they pull away for air, his free hand cradles her face, thumb gently brushing over her cheek. He presses a kiss to her nose. “Hey, hey, we’ve got time.”

“Let’s get away, Kaidan, just the two of us.” She’s still breathless, all she wants is to kiss him again, but she settles for resting her forehead against his chest.

“You got a place in mind?”

“My grandparent’s old house, in Anchorage. Couple hours away, at least. Quiet and pretty unlikely to be occupied this time of year.”

“Then let’s get out of here.” He grabs her crutches and hands them to her, before grabbing his own bag off the bench.

Six hours and a trip to the grocery store later, they’re climbing out of a skycar in front of a modest looking house, twenty minutes outside the city limits of Anchorage, Alaska. Standing on the porch, Norah Jean leans her crutches against the siding to dig into a rarely used pocket of her duffel bag. She retrieves an old set of keys, unlocking the doorknob, then leaning all her weight against the door to unlock the deadbolt. The door creaks as she swings it open.

“After you.” She waves Kaidan and his armful of grocery bags into the dark house, grabbing her crutches and following him in, locking the door behind them. She flips the lights on, illuminating the living room and kitchen.

“Nice place. You spend a lot of time here?” Kaidan sets their groceries down on the counter, separating out the perishables. Norah Jean leans on the bar, smiling at him as he opens a bottle of beer and passes it to her.

“Not anymore, used to visit all the time as a kid though. Pretty sure my bedroom hasn’t changed in 20 years.” She clinks her bottle against his and takes a swig.

“Let me guess, you’ve got model ships all over your room.”

“Close. Old space stations and satellites. Plus, a scale model of the solar system, minus the sun.”

“Impressive.”

“I like to think so.”

“Can’t wait to see it.”

“You’ll see when groceries are put away.”

“And you’re not gonna help me?”

“Kaidan, if you want me in that tiny kitchen with my crutches, I’ll gladly grab one thing at a time and put it away, but I prefer to stay out of the way. This is a two-butt kitchen, max, and these crutches may as well be an extra butt.”

Kaidan laughs. “Fine, fine, but if you want another beer, you’re grabbing it yourself.”

“I can live with that.”

He puts the last few things in the cupboards, then wanders back around to the bar, pressing a kiss to the side of her head. “C’mon, Norah Jean, give me the grand tour.”

“I’m afraid it’s not all that grand, but I’ll indulge you.”

She leads him around the first floor, showing him the fireplace in the living room that’s older than half the house itself. Down the hall is a bathroom and the office that sometimes doubles as a guest room, where Kaidan spends at least 10 minutes asking questions about the artifacts and antiques in display cases along the wall. Between the two is the back door.

Upstairs was another bathroom, the master bedroom, and the other two bedrooms.

“I’d show you Jamie’s room, but I’m pretty sure it’s locked, and also I don’t care, but here’s my old bedroom in all its glory.” Norah Jean swings open the door, flicking on the light, revealing blue-black walls and ceiling, spattered with thousands of white speckles. A handful of constellations are carefully mapped out across the walls.

“Wow.” Kaidan idly traces along the lines of Orion with a finger, gazing around at the sky on her walls. “Did you paint all this?”

Norah Jean snorts, “Hell no, my grandpa did most of it, I helped. Well, I helped as much as a fidgety 5-year-old can muster when she’d rather be outside. Pretty sure there’s a few sets of handprints scattered around from me and Jamie.”

“It looks really good, it’s easy to see how you ended up in space after spending enough nights surrounded by walls like these. You’ve even got Arcturus up here. Didn’t you say you grew up there? On Arcturus station?”

“Yeah, Dad ran the garrison for a while, gave us a break from moving every other year. He didn’t get reassigned till I graduated high school, and by then I’d enlisted.” She drops her duffel bag on the floor, walking across the room to sit on the bed. “How’d you work your way back to the Alliance? After Jump Zero, I mean.”

“Time, mostly. Dad tried not to talk about it, didn’t want to push me further away.” He drops his own bag next to hers and sits on the bed beside her. “Aunt Irene, though, she wouldn’t let it go. She was always trying to talk me into the Marines, long as I can remember. It got a little better as I got older, but then after BAaT, she mostly quit talking about it, just the odd comment once or twice a year. Then a few months before my 22nd birthday, she talked me into staying a week with her and her wife in Rhode Island, to get away from Vancouver and breathe for a bit, y’know, see the Atlantic Ocean, Niagara Falls, few other places. The whole week she didn’t bring up the Alliance even one time. I got so curious that I finally cracked and asked her about it my last day there. She told me I was more than old enough to make my own choice, that she’d talked it up all she could and especially after the disaster with BAaT, all she could do now was support whatever choice I came to. I enlisted 6 months later.”

“Sounds like she really had an impact on you.”

“Yeah. She was having a blast drilling recruits out on Jump Zero when I finally decided. I think she’s still there. She’s made a hell of a reputation breaking in cadets, earned the nickname “Mad Major Mabbit”, she thinks it’s the greatest thing.”

Norah Jean stares at him, mouth hanging open. “No.”

“Yeah.”

“No, Kaidan, she took a year on Arcturus my first year of training, I swear to God she was the reason I almost dropped out. We were butting heads all year. And she’s your aunt?”

“Really? She’s the reason you nearly washed out? I wonder what she’d have to say about you now?”

“Probably not much good, I mean, we did steal the Normandy.”

Before he can say anything in response Norah Jean shivers, then, a long, low rumble of thunder rattles the house. Her face lights up and she shoots off the bed, hopping on her good leg before snatching up her crutches and racing to the window.

“It’s thundering! Let’s go downstairs and watch the storm!” She grabs her N7 hoodie from her bag, tossing it on.

Kaidan gives her a look. “You want to go sit in the rain, just because its thundering?”

“No, I want to sit under the back porch, enjoy the smell of the rain, and watch the lightning, all while staying perfectly dry.”

“Alright, I think I can get behind that.” He gets up off the bed, searching in his own bag for a jacket, pulling it on as Norah Jean works her way down the hall.

He joins her at the top of the stairs, not sure if she stopped to wait or if she doesn’t know how to get down them. Her laser focused stare down the steps says the latter.

“Do you trust me?”

She looks up at him, chewing her lip. “Why?”

“Just answer the question.”

“Yes?”

“Good, I’ll carry you down the stairs.”

Norah Jean makes an undignified squeak as he sweeps her off her feet, careful not to jostle her knee. One arm is almost uncomfortably tight around his neck, and the other grips her crutches as he walks down the stairs. He carries her to the couch, gently setting her down to let her sort herself out.

“You know, I’ve got to learn how to get down the stairs sometime this week.” She grumbles as she gets to her foot, making for the bar and their half-forgotten beers.

“Here, I’ll grab those, and some new ones. And don’t worry, I’ll let you work out the next time yourself.”

He follows her out the back door, to an old bench just out of the way of the water splashing over the edge of the gutters.

“You sure we’ll stay dry?” He passes her one of the open beers.

“Probably. Unless the wind blows this way, we’ll be fine.”

He looks out at the back yard. Lightning flashes, he counts on instinct. Thunder crashes overhead.

“Ten seconds.” She swings her good leg as she sips her beer. “Do you get a fun tingly feeling from thunderstorms? Or is it just 2.5s and 3s?”

“Sometimes. Don’t usually associate it with fun though, it’s just kinda weird feeling to me. I don’t think 2s are as sensitive to it.”

“Huh. I’ve always loved thunderstorms, partly for the feeling. Just one of those things that reminds me I’m still here. Still kicking.”

“Yeah.” He reaches for her hand and she laces her fingers with his.

13 notes • Posted 2021-05-19 06:45:10 GMT

Aftermath - Chapter 2

Read on AO3

Chapter 1

Sugar?

Kaidan steps through the door into the medbay, greeted by the smell of antiseptics and the doctor’s warm smile. “You wanted to see me?”

“Yes, I’m having a bit of a problem with our dear Commander, she’s locked herself in her quarters with a migraine, and normally I wouldn’t fuss, but she’s been in there since yesterday, and when I stopped by to check up on her this afternoon, she wouldn’t open the door. As far as I can tell she hasn’t so much has poked her head out that door since she shut it. I did consider calling Jeff down to check on her, but I’d hate to bring him all the way here and have Shepard turn him away. You’re the one best equipped to handle the situation at hand.”

“And you said she’s been in there for 24 hours?” Kaidan knew the stress of the 2 weeks since Virmire was taking its toll on the Commander, and that she’s been working through a migraine, but he’d never seen her down for more than a few hours.

“A little longer than that, really, she stopped by yesterday around noon to tell me she was locking herself in there until the worst of it passed. I believe her exact words were ‘Once my brain stops trying to implode and ooze out of my amp jack’.” Dr. Chakwas grimaced at the description as she repeated it. “I offered her a dose of painkillers, but she waved it off and went on her way.”

“Yeah, ouch, I’ll see if I can’t convince her to at least eat something.”

“Thank you, and good luck.”

Thermos of coffee, water bottle, and hot leftovers in hand, Kaidan leans against the wall beside the door as he sends off a message to Shepard. Hopefully, she was awake. Knocking wouldn’t work, the chances of her hearing aids being on were slim. He’d noticed she had the habit of turning them off when things started to overwhelm her. Feels like they’ve been off more than on lately. He breathes a sigh of relief when the indicator light flashes from red to green, and the door hisses open. As the door shuts behind him, it’s clear that she’s turned off every light she possibly could. The emergency lighting along the floor is still on, though he’s sure she considered cracking into the electrical panel to deal with them.

Walking further into the dark room, he almost believes she isn’t there. Almost. He spots her curled up with a pillow over her head as he pulls a chair up to the side of the bed. Her field feels different without her amp in, softer around the edges, but it still vibrant enough to pop and fizzle against his own. As he sits down and sets the food and drinks on the end table, Shepard moves her pillow to squint at him. He tries not to let his eyes linger on her bare arms or the near meter of hair spread across the mattress.

“Doc told me it was a nasty one.” Kaidan signs, “So I came with coffee. Pretty sure it’s strong enough to give a Krogan heart palpitations, so it should help.”

She pulls herself up to sit against the headboard. She looked like hell. “Sugar?”

“Plenty, don’t worry.” He uncaps the thermos and passes it into her waiting hands. As she takes a sip, her eyes slide closed and Kaidan swears he’s never seen such a blissful look on her face. He lets her enjoy the coffee for a moment before catching her attention again. “If you’re feeling up to it, I’ve got some leftovers too. If you don’t eat soon, I think Chakwas might break down your door and sit on you until you do. Or worse, drag you to the medbay.”

Shepard almost reluctantly sets the coffee down, reaching for the container as Kaidan snaps open the lid and sticks a fork in the steaming spaghetti. The second she takes a bite it’s like a switch flips and the second and third bites follow soon after. Half the container is gone before she pauses to take another drink of coffee and glances up at Kaidan. “I know this is just leftovers, but fuck, it tastes so good I could kiss you.”

Kaidan laughs as his cheeks redden, and he brings up his omnitool to check some emails while she finishes her food. He needs to distract himself from the fact that he wants her to kiss him. He makes sure to send one off to Chakwas, reassuring her that he’s gotten Shepard eating and at least caffeinated. He moves the bottle of water closer to the coffee, waving his hand next to it catch her attention and let her know its there.

“So. Ears are on now, by the way, don’t worry about signing. I had an idea, to boost morale. I can’t be the only person on this ship cracking under the stress, so I’m gonna see if I can’t work out some kind of sparring match in the cargo bay. Prizes and stuff, plus something extra for the first crewmate who can get me down on the mat.”

“Yeah? You sure anybody’ll go for it?” He spoke softly, the way she kept her eyes half closed told him the pain was still very much there.

“Oh, you know, I’ve overheard a conversation or two, some of the other marines are totally sure they can take me, just, without the biotics. Remember, some of these jarheads have never actually seen me in the field.”

“Yeah, or they’d never dream of going toe-to-toe with you. What’s your grand prize?”

“Probably some credits and a few pistol mods? I don’t know for sure yet.”

“I think it’s a great idea, help everybody loosen up a bit.” He checks the time; he drew the short straw for the watch in the CIC. “Alright, I’ve got my watch coming up soon, so I’ll get out of your hair. Go check in with Chakwas if you can brave the lights out there.”

“I’ll try.”

Kaidan makes it halfway to the door before he remembers the chocolate bar in his pocket. The good chocolate. Not impossible to get ahold of in space, but also not high on any Alliance requisition lists. He walks back to the bed, partially melted chocolate in hand.

“I forgot about this. A good bar of chocolate almost always helps a migraine.”

She looks reverently at the chocolate, hand outstretched, but not grabbing it. “Are you sure? This is definitely not on any of our supply lists.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ve got a few more stashed away, don’t worry about it.” He presses the bar into her hand, closing her fingers around it. He’s halfway out the door when she speaks again.

“Kaidan? Thank you.”

“Anytime.”

Kaidan watches what has to be at least 2/3 of the crew milling around the cargo bay, navy and marines, humans and aliens, all chatting and joking around. He’d picked a good spot, back near a wall, next to Joker. Near the center of the bay, he hears a thud as the Commander puts another marine on the mat. She offered up a prize of 300 credits and a few choice pistol mods to the first person who could get her on the mat, no biotics, no tech, just good old fashioned hand-to-hand. At least Shepard’s got the decency to help them up off the mat after she kicks their asses. Still, even after half a dozen crewmates beat, there’s still plenty looking to try their luck at beating Commander Shepard. She doesn’t even look like she’s broken a sweat.

Kaidan fiddles with his omnitool, pretending he isn’t interested in the match. Another marine hits the mat, and his eyes flick up watch Shepard help Fredricks up onto his feet, and this time she looks right at him, a mischievous glint in intense brown eyes.

“You up for a challenge, Alenko?” Her voice carries clearly over the chatter and general noise of the cargo bay.

Kaidan knows he’s got the look of a deer caught in headlights but recovers gracefully enough. “Oh, no, Commander, I’m content just watching you take out every other marine on board.”

“What, are you scared you’ll beat your CO? Don’t worry, you won’t.”

Joker leans over, with a hand up to his mouth for an especially dramatic stage whisper. “You know if you walk away the crew will never let you live it down. Neither will Norah Jean. She’ll be bringing it up for at least the next 10 years. Believe me.”

Kaidan looks between Joker and Shepard, who’s still standing on the mat, hands on her hips and already looking like she’s won. Then he sighs and wades through the onlookers. Once in the ring he looks down at her. “You know, you’re a real pain in the ass, right?”

“I try.”

Kaidan makes his way to the table set up a few feet from the edge of the mat and makes a show of taking off his uniform shirt, then unplugging his amp, setting both on the table beside hers. Slowly they begin to circle each other.

“Think you can beat me?”

“Shepard, I have no illusions of how this is going to end. I watched you bring Fredricks down in 6 moves. He’s twice your size. My chances aren’t looking good here.” He throws a jab at her left side, testing her reflexes, and she blocks it easily.

They trade blows, trying to whittle each other down, and Adams is clearly about to call it in a draw when Kaidan lunges forward. Then the cargo bay blurs and his back slams onto the mat, knocking the wind right out of his lungs. Shepard is beaming above him. She offers a hand to help him haul himself up, and he moves for his discarded shirt and amp.

“Uh, yeah, Shepard, remind me not to get in your way.”

She pats his shoulder and gives him a thumbs up as she drinks her water.

12 notes • Posted 2021-04-30 08:19:34 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #am i surprised? no #good fic #good times #my tags should surprise nobody #of course none of my most popular posts could be artwork #anything to cut down this length lmao #mass effect

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pigeontheoneandonly · 4 years ago

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Author Interview

Tagged By: @bardofheartdive, @rpgwrites, @dafan7711

Tagging: Anyone. I think most have been tagged by this point? But if you haven’t and this looks fun, please tag me so I can read!

Name: Pigeon

Fandoms: I’ve posted fics for Mass Effect and Dragon Age. I’ve written fics and parts of fics for World of Warcraft, Baldur’s Gate, SWTOR, Neverwinter Nights, Pathfinder, D&D, and probably other things I’ve forgotten, but not posted any.

Where you post: AO3 and tumblr (masterpost)

Most popular one-shot: Smut: After Mars, a small fShenko AU where Kaidan isn’t injured on Mars in the opening of ME3. Non-Smut: Once More, With Feeling, an mShenko story where Kaidan goes to Andromeda.

Most popular multi-chapter: Mass Effect: Labyrinth, my fShenko ME2 novelization featuring Nathaly Shepard. It is canon-divergent while trying to stay true to the spirit of ME2, if not the exact canon, and includes a novel-length intertwining fic about Kaidan’s activities during this era.

Actual worst part of writing: Wanting to write all day and having no energy left when you’re done with work, dinner, and other life responsibilities

Favorite story you wrote: This changes frequently, but right now it’s Lemongrass, a Nathaly/Kaidan post-ME3 one-shot about trying to rebuild one’s sense of self after investing your entire identity in war and survival.

Story you were nervous to post: All smut, really, ever, every time. Certain chapters out of Discovery and Labyrinth. A chapter coming up in Labyrinth that I’ve been nervous about for literal years, since I first put it in the outline, and frankly will be a test of how much my readers trust me from a storytelling perspective. Not because it doesn’t make sense, but because it introduces some uncomfortable elements that will need to be addressed and resolved.

How you choose your titles: Mostly by giving up and realizing I have to call it something. I tend to like my short fic titles more than my long fics. But generally, my titles suck.

Complete works: I’m not sure exactly? My masterlist has 43 complete.

Incomplete works: Of stuff that is partially posted, Labyrinth and Wanderers (my DA/ME crossover) are the ones that stand out. Lots and lots and lots of partially written one-shots and other unposted stuff.

Do you outline: Absolutely. Anything longer than a few thousand words, and I’m totally lost without one. My outlines tend not to be super-formal however.

Coming soon ideas, maybe? I’ve been typing away like a fiend on a Pathfinder fan novel tentatively titled Shallow Graves. It could be summarized as: Found family siblings must confront their grief and learn to forgive each other in order to stop the man who murdered one of their own from destroying the world.

Ask me anything: I’m not really sure how this question is supposed to be used? So I guess I’ll just ramble… I’m routinely asked about my writing process. But at the end of the day, the truth is that I write because I have to. My mental health, my ability to “adult”, my enjoyment of life and ability to be present all plummet when I stop writing, to the point that it’s the first thing my therapist asks about if I seem to be in a particularly sorry state. It’s my biggest and most enduring coping mechanism, even though I’m rarely writing directly about what is bothering me. And for some reason, some quirk of my psychology, it has to be fiction… journaling never does the trick but just causes me to dwell on the bad.

(And I want to note that this is not remotely exclusive with “because I like to”… I also enjoy it! But my whole life destabilizes if I stop altogether for an extended period of time.)

Best writing traits: I think I’m really good at digging into a character’s head and occupying their space, and that comes out when I write them into the fic.

Upcoming Story You Are Most Excited to Write: The aforementioned Shallow Graves, and honestly also looking forward to getting back to Labyrinth. There’s some good stuff coming up! If also nerve-wracking stuff…

Spicy Tangential Opinion: Hot mustard sauce is the only acceptable chicken nugget dip.

#about me

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miniature-space-hamster · 3 years ago

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Writing Tag Game

* Tagged by @ljandersen thank you, I’ve never done one of these before ^^ * Tagging: Umm... I don’t know if I have followers I can tag that aren't tagged already that post fics, sorry :/

if any of my followers want to join though, please feel free ^^

* How many works do you have on AO3?

Currently 3 works (4, 2, & 2 Chapters each)

Planning to continue to add to each

* What’s your total AO3 word count?

19,259 atm

* What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. Soft Place to Land: (ME1&2, Karina Shepard) 9 Kudos

2. Weekend’s Reprieve: (Post ME3, Karina Shepard) 3 Kudos

3. Under Our Blue Light: (Pre ME1, Naomi Shepard) 0 Kudos (Just posted it last night lol)

* Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Yeah, I like talking with people about similar interests. It’s one of the reasons I started writing. Honestly, feel free to message/comment anytime I don't mind :)

* What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Does chapters I haven’t posted yet count? Chapter 3 of Under our Blue Light did have me tearing up over a glass of wine while I was writing it.

* What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

Weekend’s Reprieve for sure. I started writing it b/c it was the Mass Effect ending I wanted to see in my first playthrough.

* Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

Not yet, idk if I would. Could be fun though.

* Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not yet, no.

* Do you write smut? If so what kind?

A lot of Karina Shepard’s stories are sexual in nature. Generally I use it to write it as a means of connection and emotional expression. Honestly pretty new to fanfics in general, so I don’t know the different kinds? lol

* Have you ever had a fic stolen?

* Have you ever had a fic translated?

I’ve never really given it thought.

* Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Could be fun, but I work a full time job and it sounds like a lot of responsibility.

* What’s your all-time favorite ship?

FShenko hands down, but I have been considering writing Shrios fics before

* What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I had a couple fics that would’ve been set before the chapters in Soft Place to Land, but they had more to do with Karina as a trans woman coming to terms with her gender identity and coming out and despite my lived-in experience I didn’t feel comfortable writing about such a sensitive topic yet.

* What are your writing strengths?

Oof, I don’t honestly have a good answer. I’m very critical of my own work and I’m only getting back into writing. I used to write in grade school as a form of therapy and coming to terms with myself as a person, but sorta stopped after college. I like to think that I’m good with writing more emotional pieces.

* What are your writing weaknesses?

I find that I can struggle with flow and transitions. Sometimes I find myself sounding repetitive when I revise my own work. I just got to keep writing more, and probably plan a bit better. lol

* What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I personally avoid it since I don’t feel fluid enough in any language but English to write effectively in it. I’ve gotten rusty with my Spanish and have all but forgotten the Hebrew my grandmother taught me.

* What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Mass Effect

* What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Soft Place to Land, I think? I’m kind of attached to that one since it was based on my first Shepard

#meme #fanfic meme #about me #my fanfics #writing #thank you for tagging <3

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ripley95 · 4 years ago

Note

I'm so excited to be reading your new fShenko "Echo of Old Embers"! You wrote another amazing post-war fShenko "Much Abides," which I love. In one, Kaidan and Shepard are in an established relationship. In the other, they've been broken up since ME 1. There are many other differences, too, of course. From a writing perception, it's been a while since penning "Much Abides." You've probably developed your writing techniques. I was wondering how the writing experiences differed or were the same?

Thank you so much for the question! It was a pleasure to see this in my inbox today. Some of this answer covers things you already know, but I figure the context will help me explain better. This turned into a longer answer than I had planned, so I hope that’s okay.

First of all, I know "Much Abides" isn't the first thing I released on AO3, but it was the first story I wrote, at least seriously enough that I wanted to try to release it. I hadn't written anything creatively in a long time before that. Probably close to a decade even, so I was starting from that point with an extreme lack of experience and knowledge. I was mostly doing it for fun, just to see where it went. I barely knew anything about technique or things to look out for. I just felt like I had a story that I wanted to get out.

All of that being said, I don't know that my overall technique has changed too much since then. I like to think, or at least hope, that my work has improved, but I think that's more of a result of refining how I go about writing than my technique actually changing.

There are a lot of ways that my writing experience was the same between both. First and foremost, I don't think my overall style has changed. I rely on a fair amount of dialogue. Descriptive exposition isn't one of my strong suits. My exposition always tends to serve more of a purpose to move the plot forward rather than give my writing pizzazz. In this way, "Echoes of Old Embers" and "Much Abides" are written similarly.

The ways that my technique is still kind of the same, but I feel like I've improved on are mostly related to editing. One of those ways is that I tend to use a lot of filler words in everyday language, and I have a feeling that's something reflected in my older writing. I used to use a lot of "just, very, really, clearly… and so on." Now I know certain things like that to keep an eye out on editing and try to minimize their use. I also feel like my editing has become more ruthless than before. I still have some guilty pleasure scenes that I end up leaving in my stories even though they don't serve a purpose to move the plot forward, but that happens less often now than before. But hey, this is fanfiction, so that shouldn't be a terrible thing anyway. You already know how many revisions "Echoes of Old Embers" has had. I think I've made improvements with having an analytical eye for things that aren't working and knowing when scenes are more frivolous. The first chapter has three different versions for this exact reason, not to mention that this whole story ended up needing some significant alterations. As you know, the first version of this story was written for the "fake dating" trope. I ended up determining that the story I was writing didn't fit the trope anymore when I was on the second to last chapter. Because of that, almost every chapter needed a complete overhaul to get rid of that aspect of it, as well as try to fix it in a way that still worked with the story I had. I don't know that I ever would have noticed that major of a problem before, or would have known how to go about fixing it. I've always edited my stories, and I'm still far from perfect in this area, but again, I hope that this is something that I've improved on.

The one way that I can think that my method changed for this story is when it comes to outlines. I've always used outlines and relied on them. I don't usually hold myself to them strictly, but I tend to be scatterbrained and will forget about things easily if I don't use one. "Echoes of Old Embers" is the first story that I didn't use an outline for, and I just saw where the story would take me as I was writing it. Similarly, I tend to write scenes out of order. I used to write whichever scene I was most passionate about in the moment and connect the dots afterwards, but this story I wrote entirely in order, so that was a different experience for me. That being said, I don't know if this experience will change my technique concerning outlining/writing out of order overall, but it has opened my eyes to the fact that both are valid ways of writing for me and that it just depends on the story and how I want to go about it.

Thanks again for the ask!

Here are links to the stories referenced if anyone's interested:

Much Abides

Echoes of Old Embers

#about me #about my writing #fanfiction #thanks for the ask!#ljandersen

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siriusordo · 7 years ago

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Never Have I Ever

Written for the 2017 MEFFW Secret Santa Fic Exchange. A holiday party, mistletoe, and a drinking game. What could possibly happen? FShenko.

A/N: I hope everyone had a great holiday season. This was written as my gift fic for @alyssalenko for the Mass Effect Secret Santa Fic Exchange 2017. I was thrilled with this match. After signing up I'd looked through the requests and saw this one. I loved it and considered writing something for it, whether I received it or not. Imagine my excitement and surprise when I opened my assignment email and found I'd been matched with her. I really loved writing this! Thanks again to @jediserenity82 for beta'ing this for me!

Read Below or at: ffnet: https://www.fanfiction.net/docs/edit.php?docid=53012872 AO3: http://archiveofourown.org/works/13169967

Never Have I Ever

"Mistletoe!"

"You have to kiss her, Major!" Samantha's delighted voice added, pointing at a green sprig above the couple.

This was the third time they'd been caught standing underneath a piece of the holiday plant this evening. It seemed like the devilish little things were hanging all over the rec room. Although it was possible that some of the crew was taking great delight in moving it around or maybe it just felt that way to Shepard.

She didn't mind kissing Kaidan, honestly she didn't. Who would? It was just the constant displays of public affection were dangerous for them. If Alliance Command got wind of their relationship, there could be consequences. At best, one of them may be reassigned, at worst they could face a court martial for fraternization. She honestly didn't want to go through that again. As they were Spectres, they were technically Council representatives and outside the Alliance's direct command, but this was still an Alliance ship and she just didn't want to take the chance. She wasn't sure she could do this without Kaidan at her side.

Before Shepard could protest, the Major leaned in and gently pressed his lips to hers. Closing her eyes, she let herself enjoy his touch, but it seemed to end just as quickly as it began. "Don't worry so much," he whispered against her lips.

"Can't help it, it's my job," she returned with a smile.

"For tonight," Kaidan added as he used a fingertip to trace along her jawline. "For me?"

"I'll try," Shepard answered. As they parted, she became aware of the cheers and catcalls of their friends and crew-members around them. She shook her head. Everyone meant well, but all it would take was one anonymous complaint to Command and she could lose him again….

"Shepard," Kaidan sighed, knowing she was already losing the battle. "Everyone here just wants to share our happiness with us. There isn't enough of it in the galaxy right now. Let them celebrate."

"You're right," she said, slipping her hand into his and squeezing it gently. "Thanks."

"You're welcome," he replied, squeezing back.

"Anyway," James said, coming up behind them and nudging Shepard's shoulder with his larger one. "You and Alenko are one of the worst kept secrets in the galaxy. No use in trying to hide it anyway."

"James!" she sputtered, rubbing her shoulder. Sometimes the big guy just didn't know his own strength.

"What?" he smirked at them. "It's the truth and everyone here but you knows it."

"You know he's right," Garrus added, joining the small circle of friends. "Relax and enjoy the party."

"Garrus! Not you too," Shepard moaned.

"Shepard, I spent a lot of time in the shuttle bay on the first Normandy with that guy," Garrus said, tilting his toward Kaidan and tapping his own nose. "There was no hiding his attraction to you every time you were in the room."

The Major's cheeks flushed at the comment, but he didn't bother trying to deny the truth.

"Do not forget the pool," Tali said from beside Garrus, her words badly slurred.

"Pool?" Shepard questioned, curious.

"On when you two would finally hook up, get vertical, do the deed," Joker explained, joining the expanding group and taking a pull from the beer in his hands. "Got pretty large too, didn't realize the Turian had inside information."

"By the way, you still owe me fifty credits." The aforementioned Turian told Joker.

"The check's in the mail," the pilot answered before turning back to Shepard and Kaidan. "You really should consider moving out from the under the mistletoe," he said, pointing above their heads. "Before Traynor decides you need to kiss him again."

"Did someone call me?" Samantha asked, as if conjured by the mere mention of her name. "By the way, if you're still under the mistletoe in another minute, it will be another kiss."

"What?" Traynor asked when everyone started laughing at the comment.

"Told ya," Joker said with a smug smirk.

"I don't mind kissing Kaidan," Shepard retorted before giving the man a quick kiss to prove her point. "It's just the public displays that make me uneasy."

"This is your crew," Samantha automatically reassured the commander, unknowingly echoing earlier reassurances. "No one will turn you in — no one."

"Thanks Samantha," Shepard said, as Kaidan wrapped in arm around her waist, "thanks everyone, really."

"Now that we got the mushy stuff out of the way, how about we have some fun?" Joker suggested with a smirk.

"What do you suggest?" Tali asked.

"A drinking game," Joker answered.

"Truth or Dare?" James offered with a grin. "Got some ideas for some good dares."

"I don't know," Shepard replied hesitantly. She didn't like to think about some of the dares that James could come up with.

"I was thinking more like 'Never Have I Ever', easier for the cripple than some of the dares that you guys think up," Joker countered, finishing off his beer, "easier to learn the deep dark secrets people are hiding too."

"I'm game," Vega said to no one's surprise.

After taking a moment and giving Joker a calculating look, Shepard replied, "If Joker's offering up a chance to learn some of his secrets I'm in.'

"I'm an open book," the pilot laughed, "just ask me."

Shepard was well aware that wasn't exactly true. Joker cracked jokes and poked fun at himself and others as a deterrence technique. It kept them from getting too close. If he didn't let them in, they couldn't hurt him. "We'll see about that," she mused aloud, glancing at him.

"I'm in," Kaidan said. "Garrus?"

"Sure, why not?" the Turian answered. "Tali?" he asked. When he didn't receive an answer, Garrus glanced over his shoulder and saw the Quarain already passed out on a nearby couch. "Guess she's out," he nearly purred with amusement.

After clearing off a nearby table, the group started to sit down and get comfortable. "Care to join us, Esteban?" James called out to his friend standing nearby.

Turning at his name, Steve asked, "What's going on?"

"Never have I ever with these guys." Vegas answered.

Glancing around, Steve made his way over to the table, grinning as he pulled out a chair and plopped himself down into it. "I'm going to enjoy this."

Laughing, Kaidan stood up and went to the nearby bar. He grabbed some clean shot glasses and handed them to James, who passed them out to the players. Next, Kaidan found a few bottles of alcohol, plus something special for Garrus, and brought them back to the table, putting all but one in the center of the table. After he sat down and filled the small tumbler, he handed the bottle to Shepard, who filled hers and passed it on.

"Everyone ready?" Shepard asked after everyone had filled their shots.

"For those of us that've never played before," Garrus said, getting a disbelieving look from all the other players, "Okay for me — what are the rules?"

"We'll take turns, going around the table, making a statement 'never have I ever' and an action." Shepard explained to her friend. "Such as, never have I ever kissed a girl," all of the players, except Steve, picked up their drinks and knocked them back, putting the empty tumbler back on the table upside down. "You can ask just about anything you want to know about the other players." Picking up her glass, Shepard swallowed the liquid and put it back on the table upside down. She shrugged a shoulder at a few of the questioning looks. "I experimented a little when I was younger."

"Understood," Garrus said, picking up his own shot and finishing it off.

"My turn," Steve declared from Shepard's other side after the glasses were all full again. "Never have I ever kissed a guy." Grabbing his shot, Steve swallowed it in one go. Putting it back on the table upside, he added, "Needed that one."

No one was surprised when Shepard took her shot or when Kaidan quickly followed her example and knocked back his drink with a grin. An eyebrow or two went up when James picked up his drink and knocked it back. "What? he asked, glancing around. "I experimented when I was young, too."

"Was?" Kaidan ribbed. "You're still a kid."

"An old man like you would know," James quickly quipped back.

Kaidan snorted back a laugh and saluted the younger man with his empty glass before setting it on the table and filling it again.

"My turn," James said, looking from Garrus on one side of him and Shepard a few seats down on the other. "Never have I ever kissed an alien." He didn't touch the drink in front of him and instead watched his friends around the table.

Garrus was the first one to pick up his shot. He silently saluted the group and swallowed the liquid. Setting it down, he picked up his bottle and refilled it. Without a word, Traynor picked hers and drank her shot. Grinning, Joker refilled it for her. Eyes scanned the table to see if anyone else would take a drink until they finally settled on Shepard.

Taking a deep breath, she seemed to steel herself against something before picking up the small tumbler and quickly swallowing the shot. Biting her lip, she put the empty glass back and leaned into Kaidan seated next to her. He automatically wrapped an arm around her and pulled her closer to him.

The silence hung heavily between them, no one knowing exactly what to say or ask. Finally James broke the silence, looking at Garrus and Shepard and asked, "Soooo—enlighten us. Each other?"

Garrus sputtered and choked in indignation. "What?"

"You were on the ship together under Cerberus, you're good friends, and you've both kissed an alien," James explained. "Makes sense."

"If you don't have all the facts maybe," Garrus retorted, shaking his head. "It was Tali if you must know."

"Oh!" James said, leaning back in his chair, looking from the Turian to the Quarian and back. "Oh! I didn't… ummmm... yeah…." he continued, rubbing the back of his neck. "I didn't know."

"It wasn't yet common knowledge," Garrus said, glancing over at his sleeping girlfriend.

"Congratulations," Shepard smiled at her friends. "The universe could use more happy right now."

The rest of the table quickly followed suit, offering well wishes for the couple. After everyone fell silent, James started to ask, "Then who?"

"Thane," Shepard answered.

"The Drell on the Citadel?" James questioned.

"Yeah," Shepard confirmed, her voice barely above a whisper.

"I'm sorry, Shepard. What was he there for?" James asked.

"Kepral's Syndrome."

"Oh damn," the younger soldier groaned, leaning back in the chair and running an agitated hand across his short hair. "I…." he trailed off, not knowing what to say.

Shepard's ill-fated relationship with the Drell assassin wasn't a secret, not really. She knew if their mission didn't kill them, his disease would eventually shorten their time together. It made her treasure every moment she'd had with Thane, and she wouldn't trade it for anything in the universe. Nothing…

"Don't worry," she waved him off. "You didn't know."

"Thanks," he replied, happy that he hadn't accidentally brought up something the Commander preferred not to think about. Sitting quietly for a moment, she could see he was thinking about something, finally he asked puzzled, "But I thought... you and the Major?"

"Weren't together at the time," Kaidan explained. "And I don't begrudge her that time with Thane. He took care of her and loved her when I couldn't." After he finished, Shepard snuggled deeper into his embrace as he kissed the top of her head lovingly.

After basking in Kaidan's warmth, Shepard sat up with a smile and asked, "Who's turn?"

The game continued on. They ribbed each other, joked, and smiled. Everyone took a turn asking questions or downing a drink when they'd done the 'never' asked. They learned about their crew-mates, their pasts and a few secrets. More importantly, they took a moment to relax and have fun.

"My turn," Joker smirked, resting his arms on the table. "Never have I ever had threesome." He looked from person to person, waiting to see if anyone would take a drink until finally someone moved.

Shrugging a shoulder, Samantha picked up the glass in front of her, saluted the table before downing the liquid.

"Traynor?" Joker said, astonished.

"What can I say," she answered, refilling her drink. "I experimented," she deadpanned, echoing others earlier words.

That broke the ice, there was no stopping it. The table erupted into laughter. They laughed until the humans had tears in their eyes. When Shepard managed to pull herself together, she said, "My turn." Giving Joker an almost evil look she asked, "Never have I ever had sex in the pilot seat of the Normandy."

"Hey! Not my chair!" Joker shouted.

Smirking at him, Shepard slowly picked up the shot glass and swallowed the liquor in one gulp, before smacking the empty down on the table.

"Shepard?!" the pilot groaned, slumping in his seat.

Next was James, picking up the tumbler he swallowed the shot in one go. After refilling it, he leaned back in his seat and clasped his hands behind his head. "What can I say, she was worth it."

When Traynor, Garrus, and Steve quickly followed, Joker face palmed and slipped further down into his seat. "Tell me you haven't desecrated my chair too?" Joker said, looking pointedly at Kaidan.

"Yeah well," the other man mumbled apologetically as he picked up his glass. "Who do you think was with Shepard?" Finishing the shot, he put the empty back on the table.

Staring at the ceiling petulantly, Joker demanded, "Has anyone not had sex in my chair?!"

Resting her elbow on the table, Shepard put her chin on her palm, smiled at Joker and the full glass in front of him. She said sweetly, "Apparently you."

Turning sharply to the commander, Joker glared at her and gave her the middle finger salute, making the table of players erupt in laughter again. "Yeah, yeah laugh it up," Joker said as he stood up and started to walk away. "We'll see who gets the last laugh."

Leaning against Kaidan's side, Shepard tried to catch her breath. Who knew that Joker's pilot chair was such a popular hot spot? Or that he left it often enough for everyone to use it as often as they had! Poor Joker….

"Not sure he was ready for that answer," Garrus chuckled as he stood up and walked over to the couch where Tali was sleeping. He gently shook her awake and whispered, "Time for bed."

"Mmmmm… okay," she mumbled, sitting up.

Garrus helped her stand up and wrapped a steadying arm around her waist. "Thanks everyone, it's been a great party but it's getting late and some of us have some calibrations to take care of in the morning."

"Night Garrus," Shepard and the other players replied, as the pair slowly turned and headed for the door.

"He's right, it is late and I need to hit the gym tomorrow before duty," James said, stretching as he stood up. "Catch you guys later," he added before heading for the elevator.

"Yeah me too, a shuttle repair in the morning for me." Cortez said, standing up and yelling for Vega to wait for him.

"Apurate amigo!" James replied, as he grabbed the door and kept it from closing. Steve stepped into the elevator and stood between Garrus and James as the doors slid shut.

"My turn to say goodnight," Traynor said to the pair left at the table as she waved at a crewman along the far wall. "I had fun, thanks for including me."

"Thank you for organizing the Christmas party," Shepard smiled at the other woman.

"You're welcome, we needed something to celebrate." Walking away Samantha added, "Have a good night, sirs."

"You too," they replied in unison, as Traynor joined a small group of people.

"It was a great party," Kaidan said, giving Shepard's hand a squeeze under the table. "Shall we call it a night and let the crew party without the officers here?"

"Come to my quarters for a private after party?" she asked with a wink. For a little added persuasion, she dragged the knuckles of their joined hands along his inner thigh and making Kaidan's breath catch in the back of his throat.

"Sounds good," he managed in a steady voice, even as their hands rubbed against his pant-clad cock. "Shall we?"

"The sooner the better," Shepard agreed, letting go of Kaidan's hand. She let her fingertips stroke along the bulge in his pants, before she pulled her hand from underneath the table, stood up, and started for the door.

"You're evil, Shepard." Kaidan groaned, lagging behind as he tried to regain some control over his body.

"I know," she laughed, waiting for him at the door. "But you wouldn't change me."

"No," he readily agreed, "I wouldn't." Even after all this time, the memory of losing her was still very fresh and painful. She was here, she was alive and they were together again. He could never dream of possibly changing anything about her or their situation. When he was finally able to stand up without making it obvious what they'd been doing under the table, Kaidan quickly joined her. "Let's go."

Shepard flashed him a grin as they walked into the hallway and across to the lift. Slapping the pad on the wall, she called it back and they waited silently for it to return. A few seconds later the doors slid open and they stepped in, the door closing automatically. She punched the button for her quarters and as it started to ascend, she leaned into Kaidan's larger body next to her and he wrapped an arm around her waist. She couldn't help a soft sigh of contentment. It was the little moments like this that made it all worth it.

"What the hell?" Shepard cursed when the lift jerked to a halt, nearly knocking her off her feet. At the same time the power cut out, killing the lights and throwing them into pitch black darkness for a brief few moments before the emergency lights kicked on.

"That's weird," Kaidan said as he steadied her.

Patting his arm in thanks, Shepard looked up and called out, "EDI?" When she didn't get the immediate anticipated response, she tried again. "EDI, answer me."

"Yes, Commander?" she reluctantly answered.

"EDI what's going on?"

"It seems the main power to the elevator has been cut," EDI needlessly explained.

"I figured that much EDI, we're stuck in here," Shepard said, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Why's the power out?"

"Revenge Shepard," Joker voice suddenly sounded over the speaker.

"Joker? What...?"

"Desecrating my chair," the pilot said. "Really? I have to sit here. And to know that everyone has used it for their..." he hesitated, searching for the word, "extracurricular activities! Ugh! It won't ever be the same."

Looking up at the speaker in the ceiling, Shepard tried to explain, "Joker I…" but he cut her off.

"Luckily, EDI understands, she knows how I feel about the Normandy, my chair and her, so she helped me out."

That sounded ominous and made Shepard almost afraid to ask — almost. "What's going on, Jeff?"

"All power to the ship's elevator has been cut," EDI explained for him, "And can't be reestablished until the engineering crew come on duty in the morning."

"That means no propulsion, lights, surveillance, and after I cut this call, all communications systems," Joker laughed. "Next time think you'll reconsider defiling a guy's chair. Have a good night guys!" As soon as he finished speaking, the line the line cut out.

"Joker!" Shepard angrily demanded. "EDI!" Neither answered. "Dammit!" She sagged against the wall behind her and rubbed her temples in aggravation.

"You okay?" Kaidan asked, stepping closer.

"No," she sighed, aggravated with Joker. "He stranded us here!"

"Yeah, but are you really surprised?"

"No, not really," she answered, running a hand through her hair with a small smile. "And honestly that night was still well worth it."

"Even if we have to spend the rest of the night here?" Kaidan asked, moving closer and resting his forearm against the wall near her head.

"Even if," Shepard reassured him as she looked up through her eyelashes. "Too bad though, I had plans for the rest of the night."

"What kind of plans?" he questioned as he leaned in and stroked her jawline with his fingertips.

She could feel her pulse quicken and her breath hitched. Having him so close, touching her was making her mind fog and thinking clearly was getting difficult. Lacing her tone with the desire she was feeling, Shepard whispered, "One that involved you, me, fewer clothes, and a bed." Slowly licking her lips, she added, "On second thought, the bed was optional."

"God Shepard," Kaidan groaned, continuing to stroke her cheek. "You can't say things like that when we can't do anything about it."

She could feel his rock hard cock pressed against her tummy. She needed to feel more of him... all of him. Reaching up, she threaded her fingers into the hair on the back of his head, taking care to avoid his implant. "Who said we can't?" she asked, before yanking his head down and desperately crashing their lips together.

She was nearly overwhelmed by him. The feeling of his body so close to hers, the fragrance of his aftershave mixed with a musky scent that was uniquely Kaidan, and the taste of him in her mouth. It was a heady mix and she loved it and had missed it when they were apart.

When the need for air made them break the kiss, Kaidan rested his forehead against hers. "We can't," he breathed heavily, "EDI."

"No audio or video feeds," Shepard said, pressing her heated core against him, "Means no EDI."

Needing no more prompting, Kaidan kissed her. This kiss reflected his growing passion, all tongue and teeth; exploring, licking, sucking and tasting. The more he took, the more he wanted. He could never get enough of her.

Breaking the kiss, Kaidan grasped a handful of her hair and gently but firmly pulled her head to the side, exposing the sensitive skin of her neck. He rained down on the flesh, from just below her ear to her pulse point and back. She moaned lustily when he nipped and sucked her ear lobe. "I love you," he whispered breathlessly.

"I love you, too."

"I need you," Kaidan moaned. He thrust his hips against her, trying to create some friction and relieve the tension building inside of him.

"Need you, too," she managed, running a hand down his side, she pulled his shirt out of his waistband of his pants. Not bothering with the snaps, Shepard grabbed two handful of fabric on the front of the shirt and yanked it open, shoving it off of him. Nearly purring in contentment, she stroked the muscles of his chest and down to his abs. She traced the light hair of his 'happy trail' down until it disappeared under the waistband of his pants. She dragged her fingers back and forth along the top of his pants, almost tickling the sensitive skin.

"Too many clothes," he mumbled, grasping the tab of the zipper on her N7 hoodie and lowered it tooth by tooth with what felt like excruciating slowness. He pushed it off her shoulders and Shepard wiggled out of it, letting it fall to the floor. Sliding down her body, Kaidan knelt in front of her, all the time keeping his gaze locked on hers. Releasing the hidden closures on the boot, he pulled it off and tossed it behind him. He took off her sock and stroked the soft skin of her calf. Putting her foot down on the deck, he quickly repeated the procedure with the other boot, putting her foot back on the floor, before standing up.

She bit her lip and watched him efficiently undo her belt and unfastened her pants. Wrapping his his fingers into the fabric of her panties and pants, he pushed both down over the swell of her hips until they pooled at her feet. She stepped out of them and kicked them out of their way. She was left standing in front of him in nothing but her tank top.

"So beautiful," he whispered, stepping closer. Sliding his hands behind her thighs, Kaidan picked her up. He felt her legs wrap around his waist and pull him tightly to her. He could feel her heated core pressed firmly against his achingly hard cock. When she grinded herself against him, Kaidan groaned and nipped her shoulder.

"Kaidan," she whined, thrusting herself into him again, desperately seeking some relief from the growing ache deep inside of her. "Please."

"What do you need, Shepard?" he asked, stroking her side. He pushed up her tank top until her breasts were exposed to the cool air, making the nipples pebble. Reaching out, he circled one with the tip of a finger then the other.

Her hips bucked in response and she moaned, "You — in me. Now!"

Reaching between their bodies, Kaidan unfastened his pants, pushing down his boxer briefs and pants just far enough to free his rock hard cock. He was past ready for this, he ached to feel her. The head of his weeping cock lined up perfectly with the heat of Shepard's opening. "Ready?"

Nodding her head, Shepard grabbed his shoulders and held on.

In one powerful stroke, Kaidan sheathed himself deeply inside of Shepard's body. Crushing their lips together in a rough kiss, Kaidan swallowed her shout of passion as he stretched and filled every inch of her.

When she finally broke the kiss, Shepard demanded, "Now — move."

"Yes ma'am," he replied, pulling out slowly and thrusting back into her heat.

He'd do anything for her. He'd lost Shepard over Alchera. Kaidan had watched as the Normandy exploded and streak across the sky, taking his life with it. He never thought he'd get another chance, but by some miracle, she was here in his arms again and he swore he'd never screw it up again. He'd die first.

"Yes," Shepard murmured, digging her nails into his shoulders and matching his pace.

"Careful," Kaidan hissed in pleasurable pain, thrusting into her again.

Arching her back against the wall, she pressed her center into him. "Harder!"

Kaidan set a demanding pace, slamming into her core as hard as possible, over and over. The force of his thrusts making Shepard's body crash into the wall, then rebound and meet his next thrust into her. With each powerful stroke he drove his cock deeper into her willing body and took them closer and closer to the very edge of passion.

Panting and nearly delirious with passion, Shepard felt a telling warmth gathering in her belly. "K…gonna…c…cum."

Not slowing his pace, Kaidan wrapped his hands around her waist and pulled her down into each powerful thrust of his hips, each going impossibly deeper inside of her.

"Yes!" she screamed as she came, unraveling at the seams. She felt her he unraveled and came hard, her walls clamping down around Kaidan's cock, which was still buried deep inside of her body.

"God!" Kaidan cried out. With a last shuddering stroke he came, spilling himself deeply inside of her body, filling her with his heat.

They rode out the crashing waves of pleasure together, holding tight to each other.

Finally spent, Kaidan let go of Shepard's legs so she could stand up. Resting a forearm to support his weight, he propped himself up and tried to catch his breath.

"Kaidan," Shepard panted after a long, quiet moment.

"I know," he answered, nuzzling her neck gently, "I know."

Twining her fingers in the curls on his head, Shepard whispered, "You know I'll have to thank Joker later."

"Hmmmm?" he questioned, kissing her neck.

"That was mind blowing."

"Was?" he questioned. They slipped to the floor, wrapped up together. "The night is still young and if we're stuck in here, I plan on making the most of it…."

The End…

A/N: Thanks all! This was a blast! AlyssAlenko, hope you love it as much as I loved writing it!

#Mass Effect #fshenko #Kaidan Alenko #female shepard #2017 MEFFW Secret Santa Exchange #fanfiction #alyssalenko

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maxrev · 7 years ago

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Since I haven’t been able to write, so I’m answering these fanfic writer questions. I decided to go ahead and do them all because...why the hell not? I will try to answer from both fandoms I’m in - Fallout 4 and Mass Effect.

It will be under the cut because it’s long ;)

Fanfic writer questions

favorite fic you wrote this year - For Fallout 4: Ode to Eyebrows (fallout 4) - a collab with an amazing artist @marvilus73 about Danse’s eyebrows featuring her f!sole Charlie! For Mass Effect: Think I’m going to have to go with the first one I wrote for the ME fandom - When Darkness Comes. I had no idea I could write angst before this game. It’s fshenko and I’m still ridiculously proud of it.

least favorite fic you wrote this year - Alliance Training for Kaidan appreciation week. It didn’t turn out the way I wanted it to and in fact, I think it was just too long and too detailed.

favorite line/scene you wrote this year - line: I actually have several I’m really proud of but we’ll go with these. Mass Effect AU - “Face it, I’m my own brand of badass and you’d be lost without it. Now turn around and I’ll help strangle you with that.” Scene was in Fallout 4: It’s long, so I’ll link it here if anyone cares to actually read it. Starts with the sentence after the second line break, "Walking slowly and carefully..." ends with "Maybe we could begin again?" -- I love this scene because it’s really emotional for Alice, my f!sole, which is unusual for her.

total number of words you wrote this year - Wow. A lot. I think I’ve been most prolific this year after finding myself immersed in the Mass Effect fandom. So, I will include anything written for A New Reality (Fallout 4) and anything Mass Effect, including NaNo. Basically, not counting A New Reality (chapts 10 through current!) or the endless bits and pieces I have, over 50 thousand words.

most popular fic this year - (By hits) Fallout 4: Confusion. A little drabble about Boone and Danse. Boone realizes that Danse is more to him than just a a fellow soldier to travel with, more than just a friend.

least popular fic this year - Mass Effect - How It All Began. Written for Shepard appreciation week. A brief glimpse at Riley’s beginnings.

longest completed fic you wrote this year - Not counting my ongoing long-fic for Fallout 4, it would be Supergiant (3330), which was written for Shepard appreciation week. An mshenko fic about some emotional upheaval in John’s life concerning his scars.

shortest completed fic you wrote this year - Mass Effect: Haunted (245). From a prompt list on tumblr. An mshenko/fshenko (neutral) drabble.

longest wip of the year - Fallout 4: A New Reality (ongoing). About my f!sole Alice and her journey through the Commonwealth. A lot more involved than that but...yeah.

shortest wip of the year - At the moment? Would probably be a Mass Effect wip -- Shore Leave part 2. An mshenko continuation of sorts to something I wrote for Kaidan appreciation week.

fandom you enjoyed writing for the most this year - Mass Effect. Wow..this game blew me away. The interactions between the characters, the dialogue - serious, hilarious, snarky - all of it. The characters felt like family in a way I didn’t get from Fallout 4 (the only other game I’ve been completely immersed in). It gave me incredible creativity with my writing, getting me to write POVs and emotions I’d never written before. It’s been a wild ride and I’ve enjoyed every single minute!

favorite character to write about this year - Long answer, which you can find here!

favorite writing song/artist/album of this year - I think I’ll go with Breaking Benjamin because their music has been the most consistent influence with writing ME fanfic.

a fic you didn’t expect to write - Anything Mass Effect? I didn’t expect to fall quite so hard into this black hole that literally took over my life. Then, we can go a little further and say anything mshenko. They also took over my life and honestly, I think I’ve done some of my best work writing about the boys and their ME romance. (I was going to elaborate as to why but we’d be here forever lol) I suppose I should list the one that really blew me away as a writer. That would be - A Wonderful Life (AO3 title - Black holes/Neutron stars for Shepard appreciation week).

something you learned this year - It’s okay to lose momentum. It’s okay to step back and take a break. I don’t have to like it -- and believe me, I don’t and I’m really having a hard time with that -- but it is okay.

fic(s) you completed this year - That’s a thing? Endless drabbles/one-shots...whatever you call them.

fics you’ll continue next year - Pirate AU, MEBB fic (which may or may not be used for that), A New Reality

current number of wips - 3 major ones, a lot of one-shots

any new fics to start next year - Not if I can help it! We’ll see what happens ;)

number of comments you haven’t read - Exactly zero. I read them all and do my best to respond.

most memorable comment/review - Damn. I honestly had quite a few that made me grin and/or laugh and it’s so hard to choose! Mass Effect: OH MY GOSSHHH IM DEAD D ECEASED this is so sweet omg !! and your writings absolutely lovely ! Fallout 4: MAX I FOUND YOUR SINS lol Deacon tho. Gotta hand it to him. He scores some devious pointage ;)“Blue, he wouldn’t know fun if it ran straight at him. He’d probably laser it to death.” Fucking yes lmao Verdict: cute af, would read again. you rock

events you participated in this year - NaNo...though that was a bomb lol, Mass Effect Flash Fanwork, Shepard appreciation week, Kaidan appreciation week, Sole Party 2.0 (Fallout), several different themed prompts for Mass Effect, Cactuarkitty’s Mass Effect Romance week. There might be more...it’s been a proliferative year for me as a writer, which may explain my burnout!

fics you wanted to write but didn’t - Mass Effect: Pirate AU for ME, though I have started it. I was trying to finish it for NaNo and get it out before the end of the year. However, that didn’t quuuuite happen xD Fallout 4: Finish Boone’s story after the Institute maybe someday

favorite fic you read this year - Fallout 4: Always By Your Side Mass Effect: There were 2 and I refuse to choose between them. Soldier’s Heart and Wish You Were Here.

a fic you read this year you would recommend everyone read - See above question.

number of favorites/bookmarks you made this year - 6 between both fandoms (AO3).

favorite fanfic author of the year - There are way too many that I absolutely love and go back and reread what they write. I refuse to narrow it down or accidentally exclude anyone.

longest fic you read this year - Mass Effect: (still reading) Zero Hour from @scottrydcrs. To be honest, I’ve read quite a few long fics this year. I don’t remember them all but that is my current one that I’m thoroughly, enjoyably immersed in ;)

shortest fic you read this year - Mass Effect: Welcome to the Suck xD from @nightmarestudio606

favorite fandom to read fic from this year - Mass Effect. The fandom has been around for so long that I keep finding hidden gems every time I search back a little further in various tags. It’s like searching for treasure and always finding a bit of sparkle in places you wouldn’t expect it. I love it!

#fanfic writers asks #writing prompts #sort of?

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ilyasvieltrevelyanshepard · 7 years ago

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Mako adventures!

Another happy weekend writing for the MEWC :P I enjoy too much this little drabbles XDDDDDD

This time I didn’t go for a prompt, just asked for a pairing and @conqueringthespace said fShenko XD so heeeeere we are, some smutty/stupid adventures with Jane and Kaidan ;)

Hope you like it! As always, it didn’t have a reread or a hard review for typos, so be nice with me hahahaha

Smut under the cut :P

Chasca. The planet looked like a green paradise but is far beyond that. Since they reached the surface, they have fought with pirates, mercs and a bunch of husks. But after hours of moving around the planet, the full team cramped inside the mako, they can say ‘well done’ and return to the Normandy. Tali and Kaidan have been working with the colonist, installing some sensors around the settlement, and upgrading the comm towers. When Shepard calls the Normandy, all the group was there, except Kaidan. Turning to face Tali, the Commander rest her shotgun on a shoulder. “Where’s Alenko, Tali?”

The younger quarian shrugs, signalling over her shoulder to the mountains behind them, “He insisted on staying with the comm buoy until it begins to function.”

Growling exasperatedly, Shepard sheathes the weapon on her back, “And asking me is overrated? Damn, you engineers can destroy a soldier’s patience. Go to the Normandy, I’ll pick up him with the Mako, and we will rendezvous on the next settlement, is closer, and the doctor has to pay a visit there anyway.”

Ashley walks beside her to the Mako, “Don’t be mad at him, Skipper. The colonist has made puppy eyes to him, and our good-hearted biotic can’t resist it.”

“I’m not mad, Ash. I will have let him do it if he has asked. I don’t like my team doing things like going solo while on planetside without a single warning to the commanding officer.” Reaching the Mako, Shepard opens the door, jumping inside before turning to face Ashley, “See you in a couple of hours. Keep them alive until I come back, will you?”

“Aye aye, Skipper.” Shepard was so lost in her own thoughts to hear the chuckle shared by Tali and Ashley when she closed the door.

Shepard is glad to be alone for the first time in the Mako since she joined the Normandy. She has always enjoyed the freedom of driving crazily with this monster of a vehicle. Taking the straighter line to the point where Kaidan was waiting, she climbed and jumped across the mountains. The six-wheel monster truck climbed the almost vertical walls without any problem, making her giggle when the car reaches the top of a mountain, only to laugh hysterically when she makes the Mako fall to the abyss, using the thrusters to stop the falling. Less than half an hour later, her fun ends when she reaches the top of the mountain where Kaidan is sitting, omnitool open and the pistol on a hand. When the sound of the Mako landing suddenly on the area startles him, he jumps from the rock where he has been sitting, weapon on hand. Shepard has to smile to herself, the look of surprise on Kaidan’s face when the Mako appeared from an almost vertical side of the mountain is hilarious. Activating the speakers of the car, Shepard chuckles, “Are we jumpy, LT?”

Storing his pistol on his hip, he crosses his arms, trying to hide his blushing after an angry snort, “Very funny, Commander.”

“You deserve it, for coming up there without asking me. Now move your sorry ass inside, we have a long way until we reach the next settlement where the Normandy is waiting.”

With a last look at the comm buoys, Kaidan walks to the Mako, opening the door and stepping inside. While locking the hatch, he looks around, surprised to see just the Commander on the pilot seat. “Did you drive alone here?”

Looking over her shoulder, she blows away a lock of hair that has fallen from her ponytail over her face, “Said the pot to the kettle. Come here, Alenko, and fix your security belt. I’m not in the mood to take the roads.”

Sitting beside her, he closes the belt quickly, fixing it with a hard thud, “And when did the mighty Commander take the easy roads? I believe we can still smell the result of your first driving demonstration with Wrex on the back.”

“Ha ha ha, very funny, Alenko.” Stepping on the gas, the Mako jumps over the cliff on the other side of the plain, making the passenger swear under his nose before grabbing the armrest with white knuckling force, feet boring themselves in the ground. “Oh gosh, this is gonna be fun!” Shepard manoeuvres the Mako over the walls of the mountain, skidding here and there, using the thrusters to jump over cracks or little valleys, laughing openly every time Kaidan let go a swearing.

“In the name of all the Gods out there Commander! Slow down!”

She keeps laughing, having more fun than she has had on her way there. The LT presence always warms her, and seeing him so unsettled is something new, and very amusing for her. “Why? I’m having fun, Alenko!” Just then, the Mako reaches a little valley between mountains, stopping abruptly when all the controls inside the vehicle turn off. “What the fuck!?” Shepard looks to Kaidan, finding him looking at her with a raised brow, both hands resting on the dashboard. “Not my fault!”

Kaidan’s eyes roll back, a little-lopsided grin fighting its way on his face, “Sure, Commander. But just for the record, that’s the reason we can’t have nice things.”

Blowing the hair from her face with a heated growl, she turns to face him, arms crossed, “I hate you. Now move that engineer ass back there and fix it.”

He chuckles, opening the closes of his security belt, “Feeling bossy, huh? Can’t say I didn’t like it.” The words are out his mouth before he can control them. It seems the adrenaline is running free in his bloodstream, making him talk his mind without filters. He leaves the pilot’s area before the commander can see the soft blush creeping to his face, being sure that even in his darker skin, she will see it. Reaching the back of the Mako, he opens a skylight on the roof of the vehicle, bathing the interior with the soft light of the sun. Opening the central unit console, he connects his omni to it, beginning to run all the diagnose programs he has preloaded on it. The Commander has joined him on the back while he works, leaning on one of the benches, legs stretched in front of her. The programs ended their diagnosis with a beep, and when Kaidan takes a look at it, he huffs, “Shit. We will be here for a while, Commander. The system has blocked itself, and I have to reboot it. It takes around an hour for the system to reload all the processes.”

“Do it. I’ll contact the Normandy and let them know that we will be late.” Knowing that Joker will be an asshole if she calls him, she sends a message to him and Ashley, letting them know that the Mako is stuck in a valley while they reboot the systems. Closing the omnitool, she fixes his gaze on Kaidan’s back, enjoying the movement of his shoulders and hips while he works on the console. Damn, she has grown addicted to that view, thanks to the hours she spent working just outside her quarters.

Kaidan spends around five minutes working on it until a soft beep from the central console signals his success. “Done. I believe we have at least 45 minutes until the system is fully online, and I will need to make a new test before we turn in on, just in case.” She nods stretching her back lazily. “And I have more bad news--”

“Don’t tell me that expending some time alone with me is considered bad news. I know I’m not a charmer like Liara, but I can keep you good company.”

He blushes again, scratching his neck with a hand, “Is not-- Damn, Shepard. I was about to say that the recycling system is one of the last to reboot, and soon the temperature will be too high to keep wearing our armours.”

Crossing her arms over her chest, she turns her face to the pilot seat, “Sure. Is not enough expending time with me, you have to make it while on your under armour.” With a huff, she stands from the bench walking back to the pilot’s seat, opening the hatches of her chest plate. “Don’t worry, I will stay here, reading, all the back for you, LT.”

An extra pair of hands joined her on the work of freeing her body from the layers of armour. “Don’t be an idiot, Shepard. You know is not what I mean.” Having her back helps a lot to his shyness, “Is not like I have been very subtle about my not so professional interest on you, Commander. Now let me help you to take off all this armour before the heat is unbearable.”

They work in silence for the next minutes, freeing her body from the armour before doing the same for him. Soon, they are facing one another in just their under armour, which did almost nothing to hide their bodies from the other’s gaze. Taking a look from tip to toe, Shepard smiles wickedly when she sees the telltale bulging on his pants. Taking a deep breath, she decides to pursue it, ignoring the little voice in her head saying that it was an awful idea. Stepping into his personal space, she puts both hands on his chest, pushing him back until he reaches the wall. Before he can say a word, she shakes her head, moving the hands lower, until they end on his waist. She can feel the muscles tensing under her touch, “You know, I’ve been doing some researching… I’m a Spectre now, do you know what it means?”

“Besides the obvious?”

Shepard chuckles, tilting her head to one side, “Haha, yeah, besides the obvious. I’m a Spectre. Therefore, I didn’t follow the Alliance regulations anymore. Not me, not my ship, not my crew. We are a Council’s tool, and their laws are the ones we have to follow.” She can feel a little tremor moving up and down his body. “Do you understand what I mean, now?”

Before she can make another stupid retort, he closes the distance, sealing their lips in a passionate kiss. Her hands find the way to his nape and hair, fingers playing with the long locks of black hair, while his hands reach for her back, delving below the under armour to touch her skin directly. Breaking the kiss, he leans their foreheads together, closing his eyes for a second, “And how far do you want to go with that not penalised activities?”

With a wicked smile, she flushes with his body, pressing every curve of her body against his, letting one of her hands slide down until she reaches his chest. “As far as you want to go. Do you want to just kiss? Perfect. Do you want to touch? Perfect too. A handjob, a blowjob? Whatever you want. Damn, you can fuck me senseless against this very wall, Kaidan.”

The hands on her back move lower until he is cupping her ass, raising her from the ground and stepping away from the wall. Shepard wraps her legs around his waist instinctively, gasping softly when his hardness touches her heated core. With a quick movement, he pins her on the wall, pressing himself against her. “That will depend, Jane.” Is the first time he calls her by her name, and it makes the butterflies in her stomach fly free. “It will be a single time fling or do you plan to repeat?”

Shepard lets her hands roam over his head and neck, reaching the amp port and caressing it with knowing movements, making him shudder, “If I have my way, I will share my bed with you later, and tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow.” Pushing away from her to look into his eyes, her frown a serious one when she talks. “What’s the purpose of saving the day if I don’t have who I want to share my life beside me?”

Pushing her again against the wall, he kisses her, almost eating her mouth like a starving man, bitting, lapping, nipping… When Shepard moans, he drinks his pleasures like a good whiskey, letting the feeling wash over him and add to his own. Kaidan breaks the kiss only when he needs to catch his breath, the sound of his breathing sounding high and loud on her hear where he hides his face. “Then there will be time later for the rest. Now I want to fuck you against that wall until you can’t think straight.” Her breathless ‘yes, please’ just add fuel to his fire, making his hips move on their own will to push more against her heat. “But that didn’t mean we can’t take our time.” Moving a hand around her waist, he goes up, caressing the underside of her breast, enjoying the little gasp that escapes her control. Using the thumb, he draws small circles over her nipple, enjoying the feeling of it under the clothes. She arches her back, moaning his name. His answer is pinching her nipple and twists it between his finger, making her gasp and wither under his touch. He keeps working on her breasts, moving from one to the other, biting her neck and shoulders, pressing his hardened bulge against her.

But soon, she had enough, pushing him apart, “Kaidan, if you didn’t tear away my clothes and fuck me senseless in the next minute, I won’t be held responsible for my actions.”

Her voice, even sounding breathless and with a husky tone, carries enough seriousness to be threatening, not that Kaidan has any intention to disobey her… “Aye aye, ma'am.” Pushing away her legs from his waist, he lowers the underwear down as soon as her two feet are on the ground. The panties lay soon forgotten on her ankles, and she manoeuvres her leg to take it off, leaving them hanging from a single foot. While she worked on that, he pulls up her top, freeing her breasts for him. With a contented hum, he lowers his mouth to them, kissing, nipping, lapping, bitting, touching every single inch of skin available. Her back arches, sweat beginning to appear on her skin, but she can’t say if it is because of the heat already spiking inside the Mako or the man in front of her. The urge to touch, to feel, is almost overwhelming. With shaky hands, she roams over his chest, following the lines of his muscles, fingertips caressing his nipples before keeping moving lower and lower. Reaching the hem of his under armour, she slips her hands under it, one of them moving to grab his ass while the other finds its way to his cock, soft fingers wrapping around it and making him moan, breaking his concentration. “Damn, Jane.”

“Stop the teasing, Lieutenant, that's an order.”

He chuckles, breathless because she keeps moving her hand up and down his hardness, “Using your rank in that situation? Tsk tsk, Commander. We will need to fight to decide who commands on the bed, huh?”

Using her free hand, she pushes the underwear down, freeing him from it and keeping the steady rhythm of her hand. “Maybe, but right now, and seeing that I have the upper hand…” She giggles to her own joke, closing her hand around the tip of his cock and doing a little twist with her wrist, eliciting a deep moan from him, “I command you to fulfil your previous threat, Kaidan.”

Kaidan’s hands are on her ass in the next second, raising her again from the floor and making her lose her grip on him with a surprised whelp. The feeling of their sex against one another, without any clothing between them, makes them shudder. Moving his hips back, he searches the perfect position, lowering her slowly, feeling how the tip of his cock breaches her core. She lost any ability to talk or think. Her body seems to be on fire, every nerve of it ready to explode under his touch. After so many months of pent-up, of what-ifs, of wet dreams and lonely nights, they are doing it. Her head hits the wall behind her, while he keeps lowering her on him, impaling her in his hard member until their pelvis touch. His breath sounds ragged, and his voice is even raspier when he talks, “Fuck, Jane. You feel so good.”

Shepard tries to find the words to say, but she can’t think, she can only feel, and instead of words, a low moan leaves her. Using her arms, she raises her body as much as she can, kissing him deeply before letting gravity take her back to her original position, making them moan in unison. After that, he grabs her hips, fixing her upper body against the wall using his chest, and begins to move his hips in earnest. That feeling, the feeling of fullness, of connection, is something they have craved but didn’t know before. He fills her in the most perfect of the ways, reaching every spot that makes her scream. And she seems perfect for him, they fit like puzzle pieces. Her core feels so warm and soft and silky… The curves of her body against his hardness, a beautiful contrast, one he enjoyed greatly. And the noises, the fucking noises are driving them crazy. The wet sounds of their lovemaking, the thuds of their hips when he pushes inside, the moans and little sounds they are doing… Kaidan feels his pleasure peaking sooner than he wants, but feeling her, hearing her, is undoing him. “Come for me, Jane. Let me feel you.” Her only answer is a deep moan when she scratches his back, her inner walls pulsing around him when she comes. And that breaks his control, at last, pushing inside her deeper than before, one, two, three times, until his own orgasm hits him. He grunts her name when cumming, keeping himself buried deep inside her, cock pulsing while her walls milk him.

They remain in the same position for several minutes, catching their breath and letting their hearts recover a more steady rhythm. At last, Kaidan’s leg begins to tremble from the effort of keeping her against the wall, and with a resigned sigh, he touches her leg. She has sensed the tremble and lowers her legs, one at a time, with some help from him. Once she is on her own feet, she wraps her arms around his neck, pushing him down to kiss him. That kiss is sweet and languid, tongues following the lines of their lips, dancing softly midair. A beep from the console beside them breaks the kiss, and Kaidan leans his forehead to hers, smiling softly. “Seems the Mako is rebooted.”

Returning the smile, she cups his face before giving his lips a soft peak, “Perfect. The sooner we are back, the sooner I can lock you in my room for the rest of the day.”

With a chuckle, Kaidan tickles her ribs, making her jump, laughing with him. “Minx. But I like the way you think. Let’s get dressed then. I need to check the systems, and I prefer to do it with some clothes on me.”

Pushing him away, she recovers her clothes from the ground, putting them on with a grin on her face, “You can work right as you are, is not like I didn’t imagine you doing it on that damned console you hover full time next my quarters.”

Dressing, Kaidan gives her head a kiss before opening the omnitool and running the programs he wants on the Mako’s systems. “Just for your information…” He looks over his shoulder, seeing her stack the armours on one of the benches, “That console works perfectly.”

She smiles cheesily, putting on the pieces of her lower armour, “I know. I asked Tali to check it out. I planned to broke it up again just to make you return to it, but it seems you didn’t need any help for that.”

Her confession makes them laugh. The situation, instead of feeling awful, like a fling between squadmates tend to feel, feels perfectly correct. They are at ease, just stupidly happy, with matching grins on their faces. When at last cold air begins to flow around them, Kaidan starts to put on his own armour, helping her to close the chest plate and she returning the favour. When they sit in the front seats, the Mako is perfectly ready to go.

Reaching the rendezvous point, the team is already gathered around the Normandy, talking with the colonists. As soon as they jump down the Mako, Ashley joins them, pushing them away from the vehicle, and giving Wrex the space he seemed to need to approach the open door. The big Krogan burst in laughs as soon as he closes the distance, “Damn, soldier, your stupid plan worked.”

Shepard turns to face Wrex, who is laughing his trademarked ‘tehehehehehe’ while touching his nose. The gesture is what makes her brain react, understanding making her blush intensely. Kaidan is at a lost until Ashley grabs their shoulders, making them come closer, “About time, Skipper. We are getting tired of seeing you two orbit around one another, and Tali and I decided to give you a little help.”

The Commander reacts quickly enough, hitting the other woman ribs, blush still in place. “I’m still deciding if you deserve a kick in the ass or a beer next time we reach the Citadel. Let me think about it while we go to Virmire.”

Kaidan is still blushing, but his smile is as bright as hers when they reach the mess, and the rest of the team just shooed away. It seems they can still find some happiness amidst the chasing...

#MEWC #mass effect writers circle #smut #mass effect #shenko #Commander Shepard #Kaidan Alenko #mako adventures #stupid ideas for a saturday night xD #I had fun writing it hahahaha

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timptoe · 2 years ago

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Running List of Fics

Hi, I’m Ryan! I took to writing fanfic as therapy, and it’s the most fun I’ve had in years. Mostly I write fluff and fun with the occasional introspective character study. Say hi! Fandom community can be awesome if you let it.

Mass Effect fics Two Lovesick Idiots (tumblr) (Ao3) - mshenko; my first fic since college twenty years ago about a silly scrapbook, inspired by this artwork by @sinclairsolutions

Chamomile with Honey (tumblr) (Ao3) - Cortez & Vega; fluff about getting through a cold

Pretty Sweet Hoverboard (tumblr) (Ao3) - mshenko; in which Shepard annoys Kaidan with a hoverboard, inspired by this post from @zet-sway

Here at the End of Everything (tumblr 1, 2, 3) (Ao3) - a character study about Joker making the choice to leave Shepard on the Crucible, aka the fic that’s helping me fix whatever it was about the ME3 ending that broke my brain

Six Words for Shepard (tumblr) (Ao3) - Jack/fShep; gift fic for @all-truths-wait-in-all-things for Holiday Harbinger 2022! Jack writes a sestina for Shepard

Peace of Mind (tumblr) (Ao3) - mshenko; gift fic for @Cardhwion on AO3 for ShenkoSummer 2023. Kaidan navigates painful memories to figure out he’s in love

Small Comforts (tumblr) (Ao3) - fshenko; gift fic @palimpsetus on AO3 for ShenkoSummer 2023: Kaidan gets his ass kicked in beach volleyball and then breaks into a lighthouse.

Ticking Like A (tumblr) (Ao3) - Joker & Vega; gift fic for @vesperfloyd for the Hatboy Exchange 2023; James isn’t alright after Sanctuary, and Joker pushes him to figure out why

The Longest Night (tumblr) (Ao3) - mshenko; Kaidan deals with the guilt of surviving Virmire by holding vigil on the longest night; because sometimes you have to wait for the light

As the Revel Meets the Day (tumblr) (Ao3) - mshenko; Four times someone sees Shepard in pain, and one time Shepard finally, finally has peace; because sometimes you get to see the light return

Dragon Age fics What Bards Sing About (tumblr) (Ao3) - Lacklon/Roland; four times during the show Lacklon notices Roland and blames it on his legs

Of Butterflies and Flying Dwarves (tumblr) (Ao3) - Lacklon/Roland; because there’s nothing funnier than putting a dwarf on a hoverboard

It’s Just a Rock, Man (tumblr) (Ao3) - Lacklon/Roland; how to court your Orlesian boyfriend in the most ridiculous way possible.

Essays When Genocide Is The Best Option (tumblr) - my attempt to piece together my thoughts about the ending of Mass Effect 3, complete with references to Stranger Than Fiction and Samuel Beckett

#mass effect #dragon age #my writing

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ljandersen · 3 years ago

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Writing Tag Game

Tagged by @jicklet Thank you for thinking of me! This is a fun one.

Tagging: @ripley95 @rpgwrites @alphahelices @shifty-looking-sheep @laelior @mallaidhsomo @ariadnewordweaver @illusivesoul @mordinette @aricazorel @becauseanders @a-cosmic-elf @jedirangerpenguin @crqstalite @sundogsandrainbows @miniature-space-hamster and anyone else who wants to play! No pressure. Also, let me know if you prefer I didn’t tag you in games.

How many works do you have on AO3?

Eight (2 epics, 3 one-shots, 3 multichaper)

What’s your total AO3 word count?

790,059 posted words

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. About Mars (ME3 fShenko, 66k): 157

2. The Favorite (ME1 femShep/Garrus vs femShep/Wrex, 2.5k): 156

3. Sideways (12 years post-war fShenko original series, 379 k, currently posting): 155

4. The Limited Edition Spaceship (ME1 fShenko, 1k): 122

5. Burning Barriers (post-war fShenko original series, 300k): 99

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Of course! My sole reason for posting fanfic is the interaction.

Investing energy into a comment and hearing silence is discouraging. It’s the same discouragement writers feel after investing energy into a story and hearing nothing.

No one is owed a story, and no one is owed a comment. But, I think without connecting with other fans through leaving comments and responding to comments, fanfiction wouldn’t exist. The gift economy would crumble.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

All my stories have happy endings. The exceptions would probably be “About Horizon” and “About Mars,” because they’re leading into other stories.

“About Horizon” leads into ME3, where Kaidan and Shepard are at odds (like the game). “About Mars” ends with Shepard left on the exploding Crucible and the Normandy stranded on an unknown planet (like the game).

What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

“Eighteen Years and Five Months.” It’s my only pure-fluff fic. It ends with Shepard finding family and home again.

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

No. With rare exception, it’s not for me.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

No. I’ve received concrit, but it wasn’t said with hate or malice.

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

No. I write love scenes, but they’re not graphic.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware. That would be like ripping a writer’s heart from their chest. I can’t imagine anything worse.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

No. I’ve had a few requests. While flattered, I'm not interested. I have reasons, but I won’t go into them here. I now have a statement on my AO3 profile preemptively clarifying that I don’t want translations of my fics.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No. It could be fun, but I’m not good about dividing myself between projects.

What’s your all-time favorite ship?

FemShep/Kaidan Alenko

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I only post finished works. I have some unfinished stories in notebooks. There’s a ME1 one-shot where Shepard, Garrus, and Kaidan are trapped in the mako as it dangles on the side of a lava tube. I like it, but there’s an important joke that only works when spoken aloud. Spelled out on paper, a big part of the story falls flat. I’ve never finished it for that reason.

What are your writing strengths?

Banter and plotting.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Prose and action scenes. Practice, practice, practice.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

Generally, I don’t like it.

If the point of view character knows the language, I prefer it be translated for the reader with a “ . . . the character said in German.” If the point of view characters doesn’t know the language, I prefer it simply be stated that a character spoke in German. Body language and tone of voice can hint at what that person means.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Mass Effect

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Sideways

#meme #fanfic meme #Mass Effect #on mass effect fanfiction #my writing #Thanks for the tag!#long post

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whimsyswastry · 3 years ago

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2021: A Year of Fic Review

Thank you so much for the tag and including me @radio-chatter <3

Total Number Of Completed Works: I actually haven't posted any of them on AO3 yet, but I managed to finish 4 one-shots. Two mReyder, one fShenko, and one Mevecon <3

Total Word Count: 17,587 (WHAT??? How is that possible!? I feel like I didn't write anything this year. Seeing the actual number is almost unbelievable). And that number is not counting the rewrite of the Unharrowed (I'm on Chapter 4 of 14).

Fandoms I’ve Written In: Mass Effect: OT, Mass Effect: Andromeda, Greedfall, Dragon Age, and Thronebreaker.

Looking Back, Did You Write More Fic Than You Thought You Would This Year, Less, Or About What You’d Expected? I wrote a little less than last year (19k) but I wasn't expecting the numbers to be that close. I've been struggling with writers block and the energy to put what's in my head on the page.

What’s Your Own Favorite Story Of The Year? Probably "Thronebreaker" because I played it last December and it injected me with the desire to write again. I may never finish it, but it'll always hold a special spot in my heart.

Did You Take Any Writing Risks This Year? I've written two NSFW pieces. I'm a strict fade-to-black person, so my NSFW is pretty tame. But it still fits within the category!

Do You Have Any Fanfic Or Profic Goals For The New Year? I want to get back to my 200 words each weekday/1k a week. That was the speed I was writing earlier in the year and I just got away from it, didn't even open some of my pieces for months at a time. I don't like that rain-cloud feeling.

Most Popular Story Of The Year? So 'The Offer' is a Dorian/Trevelyan one-shot I wrote a couple years ago and it seems to have gained some unexpected traction especially for a one-shot that was posted with a back-date.

Story Of Mine Most Under-Appreciated By The Universe, In My Opinion: A DA2 "Mark of the Assassin" retelling, which happens immediately after Fenris leaves Hawke. The first two chapters are posted as part of Fictober 2018, which I think is why it has like..zero kudos. Once I string them all together and make a true fic out of it, it'll probably get a better audience.

Most Fun Story To Write: Definitely the Thronebreaker NSFW scene. It was my first, but I saw a piece of art that was so breathtaking I had to try and recreate it narratively.

Most Unintentionally Telling Story: lmfao anything with Cullen. Not really the story lines, but how Cullen is written is very much based one someone close to me.

Biggest Disappointment: My energy levels are definitely the biggest disappointment. Re-reading things I haven't read in months or a year or two and I'm like "this isn't so bad, why'd I stop" and then remembering that I stopped because whenever I open up a document I just feel this crushing weight of expectation that I can't handle right now. I miss writing the way I used to write, carefree and obsessively haha

Biggest Surprise: Finding 4thewords.com while I'm not a big fan of having to write in a browser, its gamified format allows me to let go and just write.

My Favorite Part Of Fandom This Year: I haven't participated much in fandom this year. I tend to just do my own thing and occasionally will make a friend along the way.

I'd love to see what all my other writing friends have to say about their year. It's been a while since we've connected (due in large part to my quitting Tumblr for like 9 months), but if you'd like to participate, please tag me! || @flamehairedsiren @midnightprelude @pigeontheoneandonly @ma-serannas-vhenan

#about whimsy #whimsy writes #2021 year in review

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ljandersen · 3 years ago

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More 100 Days of Writing! Yay! I love that I get a hundred days of seeing everyone's writing process on my dash. I’m not strictly following the questions in order or posting every day, but it’s fun to still play along. Thanks, @the-wip-project !

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Question from Day 2 (I know it’s not day two, but I’m erratically cheating, remember?) For your current WIP: Do you have many WIPs? What motivates you to write this specific story? What makes this story special for you? Is there a special twist/trope/setting you wanted to explore? What got you started on this particular story?

My current WIP is “Sideways,” a 5-part fShenko post-war long fic. I’m posting it like a box set, essentially all the parts (books) in one big post on AO3. I have the first draft written for all five parts and am currently posting part 3.

What motivated me to write this story was a string of “what if” questions that haunted me after finishing my 300k fShenko post-war long fic, “Burning Barriers.” My mind kept spinning on questions about human-asari relationships. What would it be like to be with someone who would live a thousand years? You’re just a blip on their radar, while they’re you’re whole life.

What would it be like to have a child who’s another species? Asari have unique abilities like mindmelding, strong biotics, long lifespan, monogendered, not to mention unique culture. Would the child feel less “yours” for being so . . . well, alien (pun intended)? How would it feel knowing your partner and child would live on long after you?

That’s when I started thinking, what if the asari parent died? Whoa. Then my mind was blown by the complexity. Your child would be another species, bound to live a thousand years, and the parent meant to take care of them is gone. Since your partner was going to live hundreds of more years, the human partner probably never even considered the possibility of losing them. Now the human parent is all this alien child has. It had so many implications, my mind kept going.

I wanted to explore these ideas in a story, but I didn’t want to write an AU of my own fanfiction. I didn’t want to write a story that wasn’t fShenko. FemShep and Kaidan are my favorite characters, and it’s their relationship I find compelling.

That’s when I thought, what would Shepard think of this alternate storyline? It’s interesting enough to think of her outside perspective, but what if it was further removed than even that. What if she saw it like I did having this other canon story ending in mind? What if the Shepard who finished my story in “Burning Barriers” and who ended up with Kaidan went to this other AU reality?

I could follow an idea from “Burning Barriers” that wasn’t realized but intrigued me. Kaidan’s asari wife is dead. He has an asari child now. How much better if he and Shepard are even enemies? Maybe Shepard has been a bad person in this timeline. After all, Mass Effect is all about the Paragon and Renegade timelines. Add in this story being told from the POV of the Shepard who’s been happily married to him in the “real” timeline, then the complexity and nuances expanded. How would she reconcile his identity to her, being both the person she knows and loves the best, but also the person she knows the least and who is also an adversary?

Then, I thought . . . What is Bad Shepard took my canon Shepard’s place? I ended “Burning Barriers” with Shepard being human Councilor. She lives on the Pacific with Kaidan and their daughter. That was already there in my post-10 year epilogue. What if this switch went both ways? It’s always a fascinating trope taking someone who’s a maverick loner and dropping them into a family situation. Do they become a better person?

False identities always interest me, and both stories lines would play so well to that interest. How would this imposter function? Both Shepards would be taken as the their altero ego, at least, initially if not longer.

So I started writing “Sideways.” I needed to tell the backstories to fill in the ten years of lost time for both timelines. But how to do it? Just through present-day revelations? A bit boring. Flashbacks are often considered unnecessary and needlessly complicate a story.

What if the flashbacks had more meaning beyond just revealing the past though? What if they provided a ticking clock. I needed a ticking clock, after all, and this was the perfect way to hit two birds with one stone. The present day revelations about the past could provide tantalizing clues and hint toward scenes that aren’t revealed yet. There would be gradual progression of stories from the past connecting to the present storyline. Perfect.

I actually wrote several chapters of “Sideways” and then discarded it. I didn’t want to pour myself into more fanfiction. It was time to move on. Do something original. Who would read a long fShenko fic that jumped off my 300k story? “Burning Barriers” wasn’t read. I think a year after posting, it had 25 kudos, under a thousand hits, and was pretty stagnant with the hit count even moving. I had a few wonderful people who made the process worthwhile through their generous comments and friendship. It would go on to get a lot of great feedback that would change my feelings about it, but at the time, the story’s reception was disappointing. It seemed unwise to take an already abysmal turnout for 300k words and cut the readership even further for a new story +100k story. So I tossed my first few chapters of “Sideways” aside.

I came across the chapters again a while later. I still had these ideas in my head for it that I was trying to squelch while I focused on ideas for an original sci fi series. When I was flipping through a notebook, I came across the story I had abandoned, and I started to read it. By the end, I was left thinking, “But then what happened? This is actually pretty good.” At that point, I decided I had to write it. I had too much passion in the project, and I had to see it through.

I decided for it to be successful (or at least, not catastrophically unsuccessful), it had to stand on its own. Hardly anyone had read the preceding 300 k story, which I had made the mistake of posting all at once. I needed this to be its own story. It had to be less words than “Burning Barriers,” which at 300 k was already too much of an investment.

Then I started writing my new story . . . 800 k words later (or so I estimate), I obviously didn’t meet my goal. But I loved writing every word, and I love how the story progresses and develops. It had a good pace, and I’m proud of it. It lent itself naturally to being divided into a series, since it had mini-arcs with mini-villains and achievements being reached. By editing each part separately, I was able to start posting, which after two years of writing the story was beginning to feel like would never happen.

Now, here I am posting part 3. I have amazing people who support me and have made the experience rewarding by sharing their enthusiasm and thoughts in comments and tags. “Sideways” surpassed “Burning Barriers” initially low turn out and has managed to stand on its own as I hoped. For a story that took so long to make it to this point, it’s been fulfilling to have so many fandom friends who cheer me on. I appreciate everyone who supports “Sideway” and just me in general as part of the fandom community.

And that’s how my supersized story came into being.

#100daysofwriting #not doing my questions in order I know #I feel like day 1 and day 2 were the most important general questions #Which is why I'm doing them now #on writing #my writing #on fanfiction #on mass effect fanfiction

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