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siriusordo · 7 years ago

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Never Have I Ever

Written for the 2017 MEFFW Secret Santa Fic Exchange. A holiday party, mistletoe, and a drinking game. What could possibly happen? FShenko.

A/N: I hope everyone had a great holiday season. This was written as my gift fic for @alyssalenko for the Mass Effect Secret Santa Fic Exchange 2017. I was thrilled with this match. After signing up I'd looked through the requests and saw this one. I loved it and considered writing something for it, whether I received it or not. Imagine my excitement and surprise when I opened my assignment email and found I'd been matched with her. I really loved writing this! Thanks again to @jediserenity82 for beta'ing this for me!

Read Below or at: ffnet: https://www.fanfiction.net/docs/edit.php?docid=53012872 AO3: http://archiveofourown.org/works/13169967

Never Have I Ever

"Mistletoe!"

"You have to kiss her, Major!" Samantha's delighted voice added, pointing at a green sprig above the couple.

This was the third time they'd been caught standing underneath a piece of the holiday plant this evening. It seemed like the devilish little things were hanging all over the rec room. Although it was possible that some of the crew was taking great delight in moving it around or maybe it just felt that way to Shepard.

She didn't mind kissing Kaidan, honestly she didn't. Who would? It was just the constant displays of public affection were dangerous for them. If Alliance Command got wind of their relationship, there could be consequences. At best, one of them may be reassigned, at worst they could face a court martial for fraternization. She honestly didn't want to go through that again. As they were Spectres, they were technically Council representatives and outside the Alliance's direct command, but this was still an Alliance ship and she just didn't want to take the chance. She wasn't sure she could do this without Kaidan at her side.

Before Shepard could protest, the Major leaned in and gently pressed his lips to hers. Closing her eyes, she let herself enjoy his touch, but it seemed to end just as quickly as it began. "Don't worry so much," he whispered against her lips.

"Can't help it, it's my job," she returned with a smile.

"For tonight," Kaidan added as he used a fingertip to trace along her jawline. "For me?"

"I'll try," Shepard answered. As they parted, she became aware of the cheers and catcalls of their friends and crew-members around them. She shook her head. Everyone meant well, but all it would take was one anonymous complaint to Command and she could lose him again….

"Shepard," Kaidan sighed, knowing she was already losing the battle. "Everyone here just wants to share our happiness with us. There isn't enough of it in the galaxy right now. Let them celebrate."

"You're right," she said, slipping her hand into his and squeezing it gently. "Thanks."

"You're welcome," he replied, squeezing back.

"Anyway," James said, coming up behind them and nudging Shepard's shoulder with his larger one. "You and Alenko are one of the worst kept secrets in the galaxy. No use in trying to hide it anyway."

"James!" she sputtered, rubbing her shoulder. Sometimes the big guy just didn't know his own strength.

"What?" he smirked at them. "It's the truth and everyone here but you knows it."

"You know he's right," Garrus added, joining the small circle of friends. "Relax and enjoy the party."

"Garrus! Not you too," Shepard moaned.

"Shepard, I spent a lot of time in the shuttle bay on the first Normandy with that guy," Garrus said, tilting his toward Kaidan and tapping his own nose. "There was no hiding his attraction to you every time you were in the room."

The Major's cheeks flushed at the comment, but he didn't bother trying to deny the truth.

"Do not forget the pool," Tali said from beside Garrus, her words badly slurred.

"Pool?" Shepard questioned, curious.

"On when you two would finally hook up, get vertical, do the deed," Joker explained, joining the expanding group and taking a pull from the beer in his hands. "Got pretty large too, didn't realize the Turian had inside information."

"By the way, you still owe me fifty credits." The aforementioned Turian told Joker.

"The check's in the mail," the pilot answered before turning back to Shepard and Kaidan. "You really should consider moving out from the under the mistletoe," he said, pointing above their heads. "Before Traynor decides you need to kiss him again."

"Did someone call me?" Samantha asked, as if conjured by the mere mention of her name. "By the way, if you're still under the mistletoe in another minute, it will be another kiss."

"What?" Traynor asked when everyone started laughing at the comment.

"Told ya," Joker said with a smug smirk.

"I don't mind kissing Kaidan," Shepard retorted before giving the man a quick kiss to prove her point. "It's just the public displays that make me uneasy."

"This is your crew," Samantha automatically reassured the commander, unknowingly echoing earlier reassurances. "No one will turn you in — no one."

"Thanks Samantha," Shepard said, as Kaidan wrapped in arm around her waist, "thanks everyone, really."

"Now that we got the mushy stuff out of the way, how about we have some fun?" Joker suggested with a smirk.

"What do you suggest?" Tali asked.

"A drinking game," Joker answered.

"Truth or Dare?" James offered with a grin. "Got some ideas for some good dares."

"I don't know," Shepard replied hesitantly. She didn't like to think about some of the dares that James could come up with.

"I was thinking more like 'Never Have I Ever', easier for the cripple than some of the dares that you guys think up," Joker countered, finishing off his beer, "easier to learn the deep dark secrets people are hiding too."

"I'm game," Vega said to no one's surprise.

After taking a moment and giving Joker a calculating look, Shepard replied, "If Joker's offering up a chance to learn some of his secrets I'm in.'

"I'm an open book," the pilot laughed, "just ask me."

Shepard was well aware that wasn't exactly true. Joker cracked jokes and poked fun at himself and others as a deterrence technique. It kept them from getting too close. If he didn't let them in, they couldn't hurt him. "We'll see about that," she mused aloud, glancing at him.

"I'm in," Kaidan said. "Garrus?"

"Sure, why not?" the Turian answered. "Tali?" he asked. When he didn't receive an answer, Garrus glanced over his shoulder and saw the Quarain already passed out on a nearby couch. "Guess she's out," he nearly purred with amusement.

After clearing off a nearby table, the group started to sit down and get comfortable. "Care to join us, Esteban?" James called out to his friend standing nearby.

Turning at his name, Steve asked, "What's going on?"

"Never have I ever with these guys." Vegas answered.

Glancing around, Steve made his way over to the table, grinning as he pulled out a chair and plopped himself down into it. "I'm going to enjoy this."

Laughing, Kaidan stood up and went to the nearby bar. He grabbed some clean shot glasses and handed them to James, who passed them out to the players. Next, Kaidan found a few bottles of alcohol, plus something special for Garrus, and brought them back to the table, putting all but one in the center of the table. After he sat down and filled the small tumbler, he handed the bottle to Shepard, who filled hers and passed it on.

"Everyone ready?" Shepard asked after everyone had filled their shots.

"For those of us that've never played before," Garrus said, getting a disbelieving look from all the other players, "Okay for me — what are the rules?"

"We'll take turns, going around the table, making a statement 'never have I ever' and an action." Shepard explained to her friend. "Such as, never have I ever kissed a girl," all of the players, except Steve, picked up their drinks and knocked them back, putting the empty tumbler back on the table upside down. "You can ask just about anything you want to know about the other players." Picking up her glass, Shepard swallowed the liquid and put it back on the table upside down. She shrugged a shoulder at a few of the questioning looks. "I experimented a little when I was younger."

"Understood," Garrus said, picking up his own shot and finishing it off.

"My turn," Steve declared from Shepard's other side after the glasses were all full again. "Never have I ever kissed a guy." Grabbing his shot, Steve swallowed it in one go. Putting it back on the table upside, he added, "Needed that one."

No one was surprised when Shepard took her shot or when Kaidan quickly followed her example and knocked back his drink with a grin. An eyebrow or two went up when James picked up his drink and knocked it back. "What? he asked, glancing around. "I experimented when I was young, too."

"Was?" Kaidan ribbed. "You're still a kid."

"An old man like you would know," James quickly quipped back.

Kaidan snorted back a laugh and saluted the younger man with his empty glass before setting it on the table and filling it again.

"My turn," James said, looking from Garrus on one side of him and Shepard a few seats down on the other. "Never have I ever kissed an alien." He didn't touch the drink in front of him and instead watched his friends around the table.

Garrus was the first one to pick up his shot. He silently saluted the group and swallowed the liquid. Setting it down, he picked up his bottle and refilled it. Without a word, Traynor picked hers and drank her shot. Grinning, Joker refilled it for her. Eyes scanned the table to see if anyone else would take a drink until they finally settled on Shepard.

Taking a deep breath, she seemed to steel herself against something before picking up the small tumbler and quickly swallowing the shot. Biting her lip, she put the empty glass back and leaned into Kaidan seated next to her. He automatically wrapped an arm around her and pulled her closer to him.

The silence hung heavily between them, no one knowing exactly what to say or ask. Finally James broke the silence, looking at Garrus and Shepard and asked, "Soooo—enlighten us. Each other?"

Garrus sputtered and choked in indignation. "What?"

"You were on the ship together under Cerberus, you're good friends, and you've both kissed an alien," James explained. "Makes sense."

"If you don't have all the facts maybe," Garrus retorted, shaking his head. "It was Tali if you must know."

"Oh!" James said, leaning back in his chair, looking from the Turian to the Quarian and back. "Oh! I didn't… ummmm... yeah…." he continued, rubbing the back of his neck. "I didn't know."

"It wasn't yet common knowledge," Garrus said, glancing over at his sleeping girlfriend.

"Congratulations," Shepard smiled at her friends. "The universe could use more happy right now."

The rest of the table quickly followed suit, offering well wishes for the couple. After everyone fell silent, James started to ask, "Then who?"

"Thane," Shepard answered.

"The Drell on the Citadel?" James questioned.

"Yeah," Shepard confirmed, her voice barely above a whisper.

"I'm sorry, Shepard. What was he there for?" James asked.

"Kepral's Syndrome."

"Oh damn," the younger soldier groaned, leaning back in the chair and running an agitated hand across his short hair. "I…." he trailed off, not knowing what to say.

Shepard's ill-fated relationship with the Drell assassin wasn't a secret, not really. She knew if their mission didn't kill them, his disease would eventually shorten their time together. It made her treasure every moment she'd had with Thane, and she wouldn't trade it for anything in the universe. Nothing…

"Don't worry," she waved him off. "You didn't know."

"Thanks," he replied, happy that he hadn't accidentally brought up something the Commander preferred not to think about. Sitting quietly for a moment, she could see he was thinking about something, finally he asked puzzled, "But I thought... you and the Major?"

"Weren't together at the time," Kaidan explained. "And I don't begrudge her that time with Thane. He took care of her and loved her when I couldn't." After he finished, Shepard snuggled deeper into his embrace as he kissed the top of her head lovingly.

After basking in Kaidan's warmth, Shepard sat up with a smile and asked, "Who's turn?"

The game continued on. They ribbed each other, joked, and smiled. Everyone took a turn asking questions or downing a drink when they'd done the 'never' asked. They learned about their crew-mates, their pasts and a few secrets. More importantly, they took a moment to relax and have fun.

"My turn," Joker smirked, resting his arms on the table. "Never have I ever had threesome." He looked from person to person, waiting to see if anyone would take a drink until finally someone moved.

Shrugging a shoulder, Samantha picked up the glass in front of her, saluted the table before downing the liquid.

"Traynor?" Joker said, astonished.

"What can I say," she answered, refilling her drink. "I experimented," she deadpanned, echoing others earlier words.

That broke the ice, there was no stopping it. The table erupted into laughter. They laughed until the humans had tears in their eyes. When Shepard managed to pull herself together, she said, "My turn." Giving Joker an almost evil look she asked, "Never have I ever had sex in the pilot seat of the Normandy."

"Hey! Not my chair!" Joker shouted.

Smirking at him, Shepard slowly picked up the shot glass and swallowed the liquor in one gulp, before smacking the empty down on the table.

"Shepard?!" the pilot groaned, slumping in his seat.

Next was James, picking up the tumbler he swallowed the shot in one go. After refilling it, he leaned back in his seat and clasped his hands behind his head. "What can I say, she was worth it."

When Traynor, Garrus, and Steve quickly followed, Joker face palmed and slipped further down into his seat. "Tell me you haven't desecrated my chair too?" Joker said, looking pointedly at Kaidan.

"Yeah well," the other man mumbled apologetically as he picked up his glass. "Who do you think was with Shepard?" Finishing the shot, he put the empty back on the table.

Staring at the ceiling petulantly, Joker demanded, "Has anyone not had sex in my chair?!"

Resting her elbow on the table, Shepard put her chin on her palm, smiled at Joker and the full glass in front of him. She said sweetly, "Apparently you."

Turning sharply to the commander, Joker glared at her and gave her the middle finger salute, making the table of players erupt in laughter again. "Yeah, yeah laugh it up," Joker said as he stood up and started to walk away. "We'll see who gets the last laugh."

Leaning against Kaidan's side, Shepard tried to catch her breath. Who knew that Joker's pilot chair was such a popular hot spot? Or that he left it often enough for everyone to use it as often as they had! Poor Joker….

"Not sure he was ready for that answer," Garrus chuckled as he stood up and walked over to the couch where Tali was sleeping. He gently shook her awake and whispered, "Time for bed."

"Mmmmm… okay," she mumbled, sitting up.

Garrus helped her stand up and wrapped a steadying arm around her waist. "Thanks everyone, it's been a great party but it's getting late and some of us have some calibrations to take care of in the morning."

"Night Garrus," Shepard and the other players replied, as the pair slowly turned and headed for the door.

"He's right, it is late and I need to hit the gym tomorrow before duty," James said, stretching as he stood up. "Catch you guys later," he added before heading for the elevator.

"Yeah me too, a shuttle repair in the morning for me." Cortez said, standing up and yelling for Vega to wait for him.

"Apurate amigo!" James replied, as he grabbed the door and kept it from closing. Steve stepped into the elevator and stood between Garrus and James as the doors slid shut.

"My turn to say goodnight," Traynor said to the pair left at the table as she waved at a crewman along the far wall. "I had fun, thanks for including me."

"Thank you for organizing the Christmas party," Shepard smiled at the other woman.

"You're welcome, we needed something to celebrate." Walking away Samantha added, "Have a good night, sirs."

"You too," they replied in unison, as Traynor joined a small group of people.

"It was a great party," Kaidan said, giving Shepard's hand a squeeze under the table. "Shall we call it a night and let the crew party without the officers here?"

"Come to my quarters for a private after party?" she asked with a wink. For a little added persuasion, she dragged the knuckles of their joined hands along his inner thigh and making Kaidan's breath catch in the back of his throat.

"Sounds good," he managed in a steady voice, even as their hands rubbed against his pant-clad cock. "Shall we?"

"The sooner the better," Shepard agreed, letting go of Kaidan's hand. She let her fingertips stroke along the bulge in his pants, before she pulled her hand from underneath the table, stood up, and started for the door.

"You're evil, Shepard." Kaidan groaned, lagging behind as he tried to regain some control over his body.

"I know," she laughed, waiting for him at the door. "But you wouldn't change me."

"No," he readily agreed, "I wouldn't." Even after all this time, the memory of losing her was still very fresh and painful. She was here, she was alive and they were together again. He could never dream of possibly changing anything about her or their situation. When he was finally able to stand up without making it obvious what they'd been doing under the table, Kaidan quickly joined her. "Let's go."

Shepard flashed him a grin as they walked into the hallway and across to the lift. Slapping the pad on the wall, she called it back and they waited silently for it to return. A few seconds later the doors slid open and they stepped in, the door closing automatically. She punched the button for her quarters and as it started to ascend, she leaned into Kaidan's larger body next to her and he wrapped an arm around her waist. She couldn't help a soft sigh of contentment. It was the little moments like this that made it all worth it.

"What the hell?" Shepard cursed when the lift jerked to a halt, nearly knocking her off her feet. At the same time the power cut out, killing the lights and throwing them into pitch black darkness for a brief few moments before the emergency lights kicked on.

"That's weird," Kaidan said as he steadied her.

Patting his arm in thanks, Shepard looked up and called out, "EDI?" When she didn't get the immediate anticipated response, she tried again. "EDI, answer me."

"Yes, Commander?" she reluctantly answered.

"EDI what's going on?"

"It seems the main power to the elevator has been cut," EDI needlessly explained.

"I figured that much EDI, we're stuck in here," Shepard said, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Why's the power out?"

"Revenge Shepard," Joker voice suddenly sounded over the speaker.

"Joker? What...?"

"Desecrating my chair," the pilot said. "Really? I have to sit here. And to know that everyone has used it for their..." he hesitated, searching for the word, "extracurricular activities! Ugh! It won't ever be the same."

Looking up at the speaker in the ceiling, Shepard tried to explain, "Joker I…" but he cut her off.

"Luckily, EDI understands, she knows how I feel about the Normandy, my chair and her, so she helped me out."

That sounded ominous and made Shepard almost afraid to ask — almost. "What's going on, Jeff?"

"All power to the ship's elevator has been cut," EDI explained for him, "And can't be reestablished until the engineering crew come on duty in the morning."

"That means no propulsion, lights, surveillance, and after I cut this call, all communications systems," Joker laughed. "Next time think you'll reconsider defiling a guy's chair. Have a good night guys!" As soon as he finished speaking, the line the line cut out.

"Joker!" Shepard angrily demanded. "EDI!" Neither answered. "Dammit!" She sagged against the wall behind her and rubbed her temples in aggravation.

"You okay?" Kaidan asked, stepping closer.

"No," she sighed, aggravated with Joker. "He stranded us here!"

"Yeah, but are you really surprised?"

"No, not really," she answered, running a hand through her hair with a small smile. "And honestly that night was still well worth it."

"Even if we have to spend the rest of the night here?" Kaidan asked, moving closer and resting his forearm against the wall near her head.

"Even if," Shepard reassured him as she looked up through her eyelashes. "Too bad though, I had plans for the rest of the night."

"What kind of plans?" he questioned as he leaned in and stroked her jawline with his fingertips.

She could feel her pulse quicken and her breath hitched. Having him so close, touching her was making her mind fog and thinking clearly was getting difficult. Lacing her tone with the desire she was feeling, Shepard whispered, "One that involved you, me, fewer clothes, and a bed." Slowly licking her lips, she added, "On second thought, the bed was optional."

"God Shepard," Kaidan groaned, continuing to stroke her cheek. "You can't say things like that when we can't do anything about it."

She could feel his rock hard cock pressed against her tummy. She needed to feel more of him... all of him. Reaching up, she threaded her fingers into the hair on the back of his head, taking care to avoid his implant. "Who said we can't?" she asked, before yanking his head down and desperately crashing their lips together.

She was nearly overwhelmed by him. The feeling of his body so close to hers, the fragrance of his aftershave mixed with a musky scent that was uniquely Kaidan, and the taste of him in her mouth. It was a heady mix and she loved it and had missed it when they were apart.

When the need for air made them break the kiss, Kaidan rested his forehead against hers. "We can't," he breathed heavily, "EDI."

"No audio or video feeds," Shepard said, pressing her heated core against him, "Means no EDI."

Needing no more prompting, Kaidan kissed her. This kiss reflected his growing passion, all tongue and teeth; exploring, licking, sucking and tasting. The more he took, the more he wanted. He could never get enough of her.

Breaking the kiss, Kaidan grasped a handful of her hair and gently but firmly pulled her head to the side, exposing the sensitive skin of her neck. He rained down on the flesh, from just below her ear to her pulse point and back. She moaned lustily when he nipped and sucked her ear lobe. "I love you," he whispered breathlessly.

"I love you, too."

"I need you," Kaidan moaned. He thrust his hips against her, trying to create some friction and relieve the tension building inside of him.

"Need you, too," she managed, running a hand down his side, she pulled his shirt out of his waistband of his pants. Not bothering with the snaps, Shepard grabbed two handful of fabric on the front of the shirt and yanked it open, shoving it off of him. Nearly purring in contentment, she stroked the muscles of his chest and down to his abs. She traced the light hair of his 'happy trail' down until it disappeared under the waistband of his pants. She dragged her fingers back and forth along the top of his pants, almost tickling the sensitive skin.

"Too many clothes," he mumbled, grasping the tab of the zipper on her N7 hoodie and lowered it tooth by tooth with what felt like excruciating slowness. He pushed it off her shoulders and Shepard wiggled out of it, letting it fall to the floor. Sliding down her body, Kaidan knelt in front of her, all the time keeping his gaze locked on hers. Releasing the hidden closures on the boot, he pulled it off and tossed it behind him. He took off her sock and stroked the soft skin of her calf. Putting her foot down on the deck, he quickly repeated the procedure with the other boot, putting her foot back on the floor, before standing up.

She bit her lip and watched him efficiently undo her belt and unfastened her pants. Wrapping his his fingers into the fabric of her panties and pants, he pushed both down over the swell of her hips until they pooled at her feet. She stepped out of them and kicked them out of their way. She was left standing in front of him in nothing but her tank top.

"So beautiful," he whispered, stepping closer. Sliding his hands behind her thighs, Kaidan picked her up. He felt her legs wrap around his waist and pull him tightly to her. He could feel her heated core pressed firmly against his achingly hard cock. When she grinded herself against him, Kaidan groaned and nipped her shoulder.

"Kaidan," she whined, thrusting herself into him again, desperately seeking some relief from the growing ache deep inside of her. "Please."

"What do you need, Shepard?" he asked, stroking her side. He pushed up her tank top until her breasts were exposed to the cool air, making the nipples pebble. Reaching out, he circled one with the tip of a finger then the other.

Her hips bucked in response and she moaned, "You — in me. Now!"

Reaching between their bodies, Kaidan unfastened his pants, pushing down his boxer briefs and pants just far enough to free his rock hard cock. He was past ready for this, he ached to feel her. The head of his weeping cock lined up perfectly with the heat of Shepard's opening. "Ready?"

Nodding her head, Shepard grabbed his shoulders and held on.

In one powerful stroke, Kaidan sheathed himself deeply inside of Shepard's body. Crushing their lips together in a rough kiss, Kaidan swallowed her shout of passion as he stretched and filled every inch of her.

When she finally broke the kiss, Shepard demanded, "Now — move."

"Yes ma'am," he replied, pulling out slowly and thrusting back into her heat.

He'd do anything for her. He'd lost Shepard over Alchera. Kaidan had watched as the Normandy exploded and streak across the sky, taking his life with it. He never thought he'd get another chance, but by some miracle, she was here in his arms again and he swore he'd never screw it up again. He'd die first.

"Yes," Shepard murmured, digging her nails into his shoulders and matching his pace.

"Careful," Kaidan hissed in pleasurable pain, thrusting into her again.

Arching her back against the wall, she pressed her center into him. "Harder!"

Kaidan set a demanding pace, slamming into her core as hard as possible, over and over. The force of his thrusts making Shepard's body crash into the wall, then rebound and meet his next thrust into her. With each powerful stroke he drove his cock deeper into her willing body and took them closer and closer to the very edge of passion.

Panting and nearly delirious with passion, Shepard felt a telling warmth gathering in her belly. "K…gonna…c…cum."

Not slowing his pace, Kaidan wrapped his hands around her waist and pulled her down into each powerful thrust of his hips, each going impossibly deeper inside of her.

"Yes!" she screamed as she came, unraveling at the seams. She felt her he unraveled and came hard, her walls clamping down around Kaidan's cock, which was still buried deep inside of her body.

"God!" Kaidan cried out. With a last shuddering stroke he came, spilling himself deeply inside of her body, filling her with his heat.

They rode out the crashing waves of pleasure together, holding tight to each other.

Finally spent, Kaidan let go of Shepard's legs so she could stand up. Resting a forearm to support his weight, he propped himself up and tried to catch his breath.

"Kaidan," Shepard panted after a long, quiet moment.

"I know," he answered, nuzzling her neck gently, "I know."

Twining her fingers in the curls on his head, Shepard whispered, "You know I'll have to thank Joker later."

"Hmmmm?" he questioned, kissing her neck.

"That was mind blowing."

"Was?" he questioned. They slipped to the floor, wrapped up together. "The night is still young and if we're stuck in here, I plan on making the most of it…."

The End…

A/N: Thanks all! This was a blast! AlyssAlenko, hope you love it as much as I loved writing it!

#Mass Effect #fshenko #Kaidan Alenko #female shepard #2017 MEFFW Secret Santa Exchange #fanfiction #alyssalenko

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maxrev · 7 years ago

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Since I haven’t been able to write, so I’m answering these fanfic writer questions. I decided to go ahead and do them all because...why the hell not? I will try to answer from both fandoms I’m in - Fallout 4 and Mass Effect.

It will be under the cut because it’s long ;)

Fanfic writer questions

favorite fic you wrote this year - For Fallout 4: Ode to Eyebrows (fallout 4) - a collab with an amazing artist @marvilus73 about Danse’s eyebrows featuring her f!sole Charlie! For Mass Effect: Think I’m going to have to go with the first one I wrote for the ME fandom - When Darkness Comes. I had no idea I could write angst before this game. It’s fshenko and I’m still ridiculously proud of it.

least favorite fic you wrote this year - Alliance Training for Kaidan appreciation week. It didn’t turn out the way I wanted it to and in fact, I think it was just too long and too detailed.

favorite line/scene you wrote this year - line: I actually have several I’m really proud of but we’ll go with these. Mass Effect AU - “Face it, I’m my own brand of badass and you’d be lost without it. Now turn around and I’ll help strangle you with that.” Scene was in Fallout 4: It’s long, so I’ll link it here if anyone cares to actually read it. Starts with the sentence after the second line break, "Walking slowly and carefully..." ends with "Maybe we could begin again?" -- I love this scene because it’s really emotional for Alice, my f!sole, which is unusual for her.

total number of words you wrote this year - Wow. A lot. I think I’ve been most prolific this year after finding myself immersed in the Mass Effect fandom. So, I will include anything written for A New Reality (Fallout 4) and anything Mass Effect, including NaNo. Basically, not counting A New Reality (chapts 10 through current!) or the endless bits and pieces I have, over 50 thousand words.

most popular fic this year - (By hits) Fallout 4: Confusion. A little drabble about Boone and Danse. Boone realizes that Danse is more to him than just a a fellow soldier to travel with, more than just a friend.

least popular fic this year - Mass Effect - How It All Began. Written for Shepard appreciation week. A brief glimpse at Riley’s beginnings.

longest completed fic you wrote this year - Not counting my ongoing long-fic for Fallout 4, it would be Supergiant (3330), which was written for Shepard appreciation week. An mshenko fic about some emotional upheaval in John’s life concerning his scars.

shortest completed fic you wrote this year - Mass Effect: Haunted (245). From a prompt list on tumblr. An mshenko/fshenko (neutral) drabble.

longest wip of the year - Fallout 4: A New Reality (ongoing). About my f!sole Alice and her journey through the Commonwealth. A lot more involved than that but...yeah.

shortest wip of the year - At the moment? Would probably be a Mass Effect wip -- Shore Leave part 2. An mshenko continuation of sorts to something I wrote for Kaidan appreciation week.

fandom you enjoyed writing for the most this year - Mass Effect. Wow..this game blew me away. The interactions between the characters, the dialogue - serious, hilarious, snarky - all of it. The characters felt like family in a way I didn’t get from Fallout 4 (the only other game I’ve been completely immersed in). It gave me incredible creativity with my writing, getting me to write POVs and emotions I’d never written before. It’s been a wild ride and I’ve enjoyed every single minute!

favorite character to write about this year - Long answer, which you can find here!

favorite writing song/artist/album of this year - I think I’ll go with Breaking Benjamin because their music has been the most consistent influence with writing ME fanfic.

a fic you didn’t expect to write - Anything Mass Effect? I didn’t expect to fall quite so hard into this black hole that literally took over my life. Then, we can go a little further and say anything mshenko. They also took over my life and honestly, I think I’ve done some of my best work writing about the boys and their ME romance. (I was going to elaborate as to why but we’d be here forever lol) I suppose I should list the one that really blew me away as a writer. That would be - A Wonderful Life (AO3 title - Black holes/Neutron stars for Shepard appreciation week).

something you learned this year - It’s okay to lose momentum. It’s okay to step back and take a break. I don’t have to like it -- and believe me, I don’t and I’m really having a hard time with that -- but it is okay.

fic(s) you completed this year - That’s a thing? Endless drabbles/one-shots...whatever you call them.

fics you’ll continue next year - Pirate AU, MEBB fic (which may or may not be used for that), A New Reality

current number of wips - 3 major ones, a lot of one-shots

any new fics to start next year - Not if I can help it! We’ll see what happens ;)

number of comments you haven’t read - Exactly zero. I read them all and do my best to respond.

most memorable comment/review - Damn. I honestly had quite a few that made me grin and/or laugh and it’s so hard to choose! Mass Effect: OH MY GOSSHHH IM DEAD D ECEASED this is so sweet omg !! and your writings absolutely lovely ! Fallout 4: MAX I FOUND YOUR SINS lol Deacon tho. Gotta hand it to him. He scores some devious pointage ;)“Blue, he wouldn’t know fun if it ran straight at him. He’d probably laser it to death.” Fucking yes lmao Verdict: cute af, would read again. you rock

events you participated in this year - NaNo...though that was a bomb lol, Mass Effect Flash Fanwork, Shepard appreciation week, Kaidan appreciation week, Sole Party 2.0 (Fallout), several different themed prompts for Mass Effect, Cactuarkitty’s Mass Effect Romance week. There might be more...it’s been a proliferative year for me as a writer, which may explain my burnout!

fics you wanted to write but didn’t - Mass Effect: Pirate AU for ME, though I have started it. I was trying to finish it for NaNo and get it out before the end of the year. However, that didn’t quuuuite happen xD Fallout 4: Finish Boone’s story after the Institute maybe someday

favorite fic you read this year - Fallout 4: Always By Your Side Mass Effect: There were 2 and I refuse to choose between them. Soldier’s Heart and Wish You Were Here.

a fic you read this year you would recommend everyone read - See above question.

number of favorites/bookmarks you made this year - 6 between both fandoms (AO3).

favorite fanfic author of the year - There are way too many that I absolutely love and go back and reread what they write. I refuse to narrow it down or accidentally exclude anyone.

longest fic you read this year - Mass Effect: (still reading) Zero Hour from @scottrydcrs. To be honest, I’ve read quite a few long fics this year. I don’t remember them all but that is my current one that I’m thoroughly, enjoyably immersed in ;)

shortest fic you read this year - Mass Effect: Welcome to the Suck xD from @nightmarestudio606

favorite fandom to read fic from this year - Mass Effect. The fandom has been around for so long that I keep finding hidden gems every time I search back a little further in various tags. It’s like searching for treasure and always finding a bit of sparkle in places you wouldn’t expect it. I love it!

#fanfic writers asks #writing prompts #sort of?

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ilyasvieltrevelyanshepard · 7 years ago

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Mako adventures!

Another happy weekend writing for the MEWC :P I enjoy too much this little drabbles XDDDDDD

This time I didn’t go for a prompt, just asked for a pairing and @conqueringthespace said fShenko XD so heeeeere we are, some smutty/stupid adventures with Jane and Kaidan ;)

Hope you like it! As always, it didn’t have a reread or a hard review for typos, so be nice with me hahahaha

Smut under the cut :P

Chasca. The planet looked like a green paradise but is far beyond that. Since they reached the surface, they have fought with pirates, mercs and a bunch of husks. But after hours of moving around the planet, the full team cramped inside the mako, they can say ‘well done’ and return to the Normandy. Tali and Kaidan have been working with the colonist, installing some sensors around the settlement, and upgrading the comm towers. When Shepard calls the Normandy, all the group was there, except Kaidan. Turning to face Tali, the Commander rest her shotgun on a shoulder. “Where’s Alenko, Tali?”

The younger quarian shrugs, signalling over her shoulder to the mountains behind them, “He insisted on staying with the comm buoy until it begins to function.”

Growling exasperatedly, Shepard sheathes the weapon on her back, “And asking me is overrated? Damn, you engineers can destroy a soldier’s patience. Go to the Normandy, I’ll pick up him with the Mako, and we will rendezvous on the next settlement, is closer, and the doctor has to pay a visit there anyway.”

Ashley walks beside her to the Mako, “Don’t be mad at him, Skipper. The colonist has made puppy eyes to him, and our good-hearted biotic can’t resist it.”

“I’m not mad, Ash. I will have let him do it if he has asked. I don’t like my team doing things like going solo while on planetside without a single warning to the commanding officer.” Reaching the Mako, Shepard opens the door, jumping inside before turning to face Ashley, “See you in a couple of hours. Keep them alive until I come back, will you?”

“Aye aye, Skipper.” Shepard was so lost in her own thoughts to hear the chuckle shared by Tali and Ashley when she closed the door.

Shepard is glad to be alone for the first time in the Mako since she joined the Normandy. She has always enjoyed the freedom of driving crazily with this monster of a vehicle. Taking the straighter line to the point where Kaidan was waiting, she climbed and jumped across the mountains. The six-wheel monster truck climbed the almost vertical walls without any problem, making her giggle when the car reaches the top of a mountain, only to laugh hysterically when she makes the Mako fall to the abyss, using the thrusters to stop the falling. Less than half an hour later, her fun ends when she reaches the top of the mountain where Kaidan is sitting, omnitool open and the pistol on a hand. When the sound of the Mako landing suddenly on the area startles him, he jumps from the rock where he has been sitting, weapon on hand. Shepard has to smile to herself, the look of surprise on Kaidan’s face when the Mako appeared from an almost vertical side of the mountain is hilarious. Activating the speakers of the car, Shepard chuckles, “Are we jumpy, LT?”

Storing his pistol on his hip, he crosses his arms, trying to hide his blushing after an angry snort, “Very funny, Commander.”

“You deserve it, for coming up there without asking me. Now move your sorry ass inside, we have a long way until we reach the next settlement where the Normandy is waiting.”

With a last look at the comm buoys, Kaidan walks to the Mako, opening the door and stepping inside. While locking the hatch, he looks around, surprised to see just the Commander on the pilot seat. “Did you drive alone here?”

Looking over her shoulder, she blows away a lock of hair that has fallen from her ponytail over her face, “Said the pot to the kettle. Come here, Alenko, and fix your security belt. I’m not in the mood to take the roads.”

Sitting beside her, he closes the belt quickly, fixing it with a hard thud, “And when did the mighty Commander take the easy roads? I believe we can still smell the result of your first driving demonstration with Wrex on the back.”

“Ha ha ha, very funny, Alenko.” Stepping on the gas, the Mako jumps over the cliff on the other side of the plain, making the passenger swear under his nose before grabbing the armrest with white knuckling force, feet boring themselves in the ground. “Oh gosh, this is gonna be fun!” Shepard manoeuvres the Mako over the walls of the mountain, skidding here and there, using the thrusters to jump over cracks or little valleys, laughing openly every time Kaidan let go a swearing.

“In the name of all the Gods out there Commander! Slow down!”

She keeps laughing, having more fun than she has had on her way there. The LT presence always warms her, and seeing him so unsettled is something new, and very amusing for her. “Why? I’m having fun, Alenko!” Just then, the Mako reaches a little valley between mountains, stopping abruptly when all the controls inside the vehicle turn off. “What the fuck!?” Shepard looks to Kaidan, finding him looking at her with a raised brow, both hands resting on the dashboard. “Not my fault!”

Kaidan’s eyes roll back, a little-lopsided grin fighting its way on his face, “Sure, Commander. But just for the record, that’s the reason we can’t have nice things.”

Blowing the hair from her face with a heated growl, she turns to face him, arms crossed, “I hate you. Now move that engineer ass back there and fix it.”

He chuckles, opening the closes of his security belt, “Feeling bossy, huh? Can’t say I didn’t like it.” The words are out his mouth before he can control them. It seems the adrenaline is running free in his bloodstream, making him talk his mind without filters. He leaves the pilot’s area before the commander can see the soft blush creeping to his face, being sure that even in his darker skin, she will see it. Reaching the back of the Mako, he opens a skylight on the roof of the vehicle, bathing the interior with the soft light of the sun. Opening the central unit console, he connects his omni to it, beginning to run all the diagnose programs he has preloaded on it. The Commander has joined him on the back while he works, leaning on one of the benches, legs stretched in front of her. The programs ended their diagnosis with a beep, and when Kaidan takes a look at it, he huffs, “Shit. We will be here for a while, Commander. The system has blocked itself, and I have to reboot it. It takes around an hour for the system to reload all the processes.”

“Do it. I’ll contact the Normandy and let them know that we will be late.” Knowing that Joker will be an asshole if she calls him, she sends a message to him and Ashley, letting them know that the Mako is stuck in a valley while they reboot the systems. Closing the omnitool, she fixes his gaze on Kaidan’s back, enjoying the movement of his shoulders and hips while he works on the console. Damn, she has grown addicted to that view, thanks to the hours she spent working just outside her quarters.

Kaidan spends around five minutes working on it until a soft beep from the central console signals his success. “Done. I believe we have at least 45 minutes until the system is fully online, and I will need to make a new test before we turn in on, just in case.” She nods stretching her back lazily. “And I have more bad news--”

“Don’t tell me that expending some time alone with me is considered bad news. I know I’m not a charmer like Liara, but I can keep you good company.”

He blushes again, scratching his neck with a hand, “Is not-- Damn, Shepard. I was about to say that the recycling system is one of the last to reboot, and soon the temperature will be too high to keep wearing our armours.”

Crossing her arms over her chest, she turns her face to the pilot seat, “Sure. Is not enough expending time with me, you have to make it while on your under armour.” With a huff, she stands from the bench walking back to the pilot’s seat, opening the hatches of her chest plate. “Don’t worry, I will stay here, reading, all the back for you, LT.”

An extra pair of hands joined her on the work of freeing her body from the layers of armour. “Don’t be an idiot, Shepard. You know is not what I mean.” Having her back helps a lot to his shyness, “Is not like I have been very subtle about my not so professional interest on you, Commander. Now let me help you to take off all this armour before the heat is unbearable.”

They work in silence for the next minutes, freeing her body from the armour before doing the same for him. Soon, they are facing one another in just their under armour, which did almost nothing to hide their bodies from the other’s gaze. Taking a look from tip to toe, Shepard smiles wickedly when she sees the telltale bulging on his pants. Taking a deep breath, she decides to pursue it, ignoring the little voice in her head saying that it was an awful idea. Stepping into his personal space, she puts both hands on his chest, pushing him back until he reaches the wall. Before he can say a word, she shakes her head, moving the hands lower, until they end on his waist. She can feel the muscles tensing under her touch, “You know, I’ve been doing some researching… I’m a Spectre now, do you know what it means?”

“Besides the obvious?”

Shepard chuckles, tilting her head to one side, “Haha, yeah, besides the obvious. I’m a Spectre. Therefore, I didn’t follow the Alliance regulations anymore. Not me, not my ship, not my crew. We are a Council’s tool, and their laws are the ones we have to follow.” She can feel a little tremor moving up and down his body. “Do you understand what I mean, now?”

Before she can make another stupid retort, he closes the distance, sealing their lips in a passionate kiss. Her hands find the way to his nape and hair, fingers playing with the long locks of black hair, while his hands reach for her back, delving below the under armour to touch her skin directly. Breaking the kiss, he leans their foreheads together, closing his eyes for a second, “And how far do you want to go with that not penalised activities?”

With a wicked smile, she flushes with his body, pressing every curve of her body against his, letting one of her hands slide down until she reaches his chest. “As far as you want to go. Do you want to just kiss? Perfect. Do you want to touch? Perfect too. A handjob, a blowjob? Whatever you want. Damn, you can fuck me senseless against this very wall, Kaidan.”

The hands on her back move lower until he is cupping her ass, raising her from the ground and stepping away from the wall. Shepard wraps her legs around his waist instinctively, gasping softly when his hardness touches her heated core. With a quick movement, he pins her on the wall, pressing himself against her. “That will depend, Jane.” Is the first time he calls her by her name, and it makes the butterflies in her stomach fly free. “It will be a single time fling or do you plan to repeat?”

Shepard lets her hands roam over his head and neck, reaching the amp port and caressing it with knowing movements, making him shudder, “If I have my way, I will share my bed with you later, and tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow.” Pushing away from her to look into his eyes, her frown a serious one when she talks. “What’s the purpose of saving the day if I don’t have who I want to share my life beside me?”

Pushing her again against the wall, he kisses her, almost eating her mouth like a starving man, bitting, lapping, nipping… When Shepard moans, he drinks his pleasures like a good whiskey, letting the feeling wash over him and add to his own. Kaidan breaks the kiss only when he needs to catch his breath, the sound of his breathing sounding high and loud on her hear where he hides his face. “Then there will be time later for the rest. Now I want to fuck you against that wall until you can’t think straight.” Her breathless ‘yes, please’ just add fuel to his fire, making his hips move on their own will to push more against her heat. “But that didn’t mean we can’t take our time.” Moving a hand around her waist, he goes up, caressing the underside of her breast, enjoying the little gasp that escapes her control. Using the thumb, he draws small circles over her nipple, enjoying the feeling of it under the clothes. She arches her back, moaning his name. His answer is pinching her nipple and twists it between his finger, making her gasp and wither under his touch. He keeps working on her breasts, moving from one to the other, biting her neck and shoulders, pressing his hardened bulge against her.

But soon, she had enough, pushing him apart, “Kaidan, if you didn’t tear away my clothes and fuck me senseless in the next minute, I won’t be held responsible for my actions.”

Her voice, even sounding breathless and with a husky tone, carries enough seriousness to be threatening, not that Kaidan has any intention to disobey her… “Aye aye, ma'am.” Pushing away her legs from his waist, he lowers the underwear down as soon as her two feet are on the ground. The panties lay soon forgotten on her ankles, and she manoeuvres her leg to take it off, leaving them hanging from a single foot. While she worked on that, he pulls up her top, freeing her breasts for him. With a contented hum, he lowers his mouth to them, kissing, nipping, lapping, bitting, touching every single inch of skin available. Her back arches, sweat beginning to appear on her skin, but she can’t say if it is because of the heat already spiking inside the Mako or the man in front of her. The urge to touch, to feel, is almost overwhelming. With shaky hands, she roams over his chest, following the lines of his muscles, fingertips caressing his nipples before keeping moving lower and lower. Reaching the hem of his under armour, she slips her hands under it, one of them moving to grab his ass while the other finds its way to his cock, soft fingers wrapping around it and making him moan, breaking his concentration. “Damn, Jane.”

“Stop the teasing, Lieutenant, that's an order.”

He chuckles, breathless because she keeps moving her hand up and down his hardness, “Using your rank in that situation? Tsk tsk, Commander. We will need to fight to decide who commands on the bed, huh?”

Using her free hand, she pushes the underwear down, freeing him from it and keeping the steady rhythm of her hand. “Maybe, but right now, and seeing that I have the upper hand…” She giggles to her own joke, closing her hand around the tip of his cock and doing a little twist with her wrist, eliciting a deep moan from him, “I command you to fulfil your previous threat, Kaidan.”

Kaidan’s hands are on her ass in the next second, raising her again from the floor and making her lose her grip on him with a surprised whelp. The feeling of their sex against one another, without any clothing between them, makes them shudder. Moving his hips back, he searches the perfect position, lowering her slowly, feeling how the tip of his cock breaches her core. She lost any ability to talk or think. Her body seems to be on fire, every nerve of it ready to explode under his touch. After so many months of pent-up, of what-ifs, of wet dreams and lonely nights, they are doing it. Her head hits the wall behind her, while he keeps lowering her on him, impaling her in his hard member until their pelvis touch. His breath sounds ragged, and his voice is even raspier when he talks, “Fuck, Jane. You feel so good.”

Shepard tries to find the words to say, but she can’t think, she can only feel, and instead of words, a low moan leaves her. Using her arms, she raises her body as much as she can, kissing him deeply before letting gravity take her back to her original position, making them moan in unison. After that, he grabs her hips, fixing her upper body against the wall using his chest, and begins to move his hips in earnest. That feeling, the feeling of fullness, of connection, is something they have craved but didn’t know before. He fills her in the most perfect of the ways, reaching every spot that makes her scream. And she seems perfect for him, they fit like puzzle pieces. Her core feels so warm and soft and silky… The curves of her body against his hardness, a beautiful contrast, one he enjoyed greatly. And the noises, the fucking noises are driving them crazy. The wet sounds of their lovemaking, the thuds of their hips when he pushes inside, the moans and little sounds they are doing… Kaidan feels his pleasure peaking sooner than he wants, but feeling her, hearing her, is undoing him. “Come for me, Jane. Let me feel you.” Her only answer is a deep moan when she scratches his back, her inner walls pulsing around him when she comes. And that breaks his control, at last, pushing inside her deeper than before, one, two, three times, until his own orgasm hits him. He grunts her name when cumming, keeping himself buried deep inside her, cock pulsing while her walls milk him.

They remain in the same position for several minutes, catching their breath and letting their hearts recover a more steady rhythm. At last, Kaidan’s leg begins to tremble from the effort of keeping her against the wall, and with a resigned sigh, he touches her leg. She has sensed the tremble and lowers her legs, one at a time, with some help from him. Once she is on her own feet, she wraps her arms around his neck, pushing him down to kiss him. That kiss is sweet and languid, tongues following the lines of their lips, dancing softly midair. A beep from the console beside them breaks the kiss, and Kaidan leans his forehead to hers, smiling softly. “Seems the Mako is rebooted.”

Returning the smile, she cups his face before giving his lips a soft peak, “Perfect. The sooner we are back, the sooner I can lock you in my room for the rest of the day.”

With a chuckle, Kaidan tickles her ribs, making her jump, laughing with him. “Minx. But I like the way you think. Let’s get dressed then. I need to check the systems, and I prefer to do it with some clothes on me.”

Pushing him away, she recovers her clothes from the ground, putting them on with a grin on her face, “You can work right as you are, is not like I didn’t imagine you doing it on that damned console you hover full time next my quarters.”

Dressing, Kaidan gives her head a kiss before opening the omnitool and running the programs he wants on the Mako’s systems. “Just for your information…” He looks over his shoulder, seeing her stack the armours on one of the benches, “That console works perfectly.”

She smiles cheesily, putting on the pieces of her lower armour, “I know. I asked Tali to check it out. I planned to broke it up again just to make you return to it, but it seems you didn’t need any help for that.”

Her confession makes them laugh. The situation, instead of feeling awful, like a fling between squadmates tend to feel, feels perfectly correct. They are at ease, just stupidly happy, with matching grins on their faces. When at last cold air begins to flow around them, Kaidan starts to put on his own armour, helping her to close the chest plate and she returning the favour. When they sit in the front seats, the Mako is perfectly ready to go.

Reaching the rendezvous point, the team is already gathered around the Normandy, talking with the colonists. As soon as they jump down the Mako, Ashley joins them, pushing them away from the vehicle, and giving Wrex the space he seemed to need to approach the open door. The big Krogan burst in laughs as soon as he closes the distance, “Damn, soldier, your stupid plan worked.”

Shepard turns to face Wrex, who is laughing his trademarked ‘tehehehehehe’ while touching his nose. The gesture is what makes her brain react, understanding making her blush intensely. Kaidan is at a lost until Ashley grabs their shoulders, making them come closer, “About time, Skipper. We are getting tired of seeing you two orbit around one another, and Tali and I decided to give you a little help.”

The Commander reacts quickly enough, hitting the other woman ribs, blush still in place. “I’m still deciding if you deserve a kick in the ass or a beer next time we reach the Citadel. Let me think about it while we go to Virmire.”

Kaidan is still blushing, but his smile is as bright as hers when they reach the mess, and the rest of the team just shooed away. It seems they can still find some happiness amidst the chasing...

#MEWC #mass effect writers circle #smut #mass effect #shenko #Commander Shepard #Kaidan Alenko #mako adventures #stupid ideas for a saturday night xD #I had fun writing it hahahaha

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timptoe · 2 years ago

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Running List of Fics

Hi, I’m Ryan! I took to writing fanfic as therapy, and it’s the most fun I’ve had in years. Mostly I write fluff and fun with the occasional introspective character study. Say hi! Fandom community can be awesome if you let it.

Mass Effect fics Two Lovesick Idiots (tumblr) (Ao3) - mshenko; my first fic since college twenty years ago about a silly scrapbook, inspired by this artwork by @sinclairsolutions

Chamomile with Honey (tumblr) (Ao3) - Cortez & Vega; fluff about getting through a cold

Pretty Sweet Hoverboard (tumblr) (Ao3) - mshenko; in which Shepard annoys Kaidan with a hoverboard, inspired by this post from @zet-sway

Here at the End of Everything (tumblr 1, 2, 3) (Ao3) - a character study about Joker making the choice to leave Shepard on the Crucible, aka the fic that’s helping me fix whatever it was about the ME3 ending that broke my brain

Six Words for Shepard (tumblr) (Ao3) - Jack/fShep; gift fic for @all-truths-wait-in-all-things for Holiday Harbinger 2022! Jack writes a sestina for Shepard

Peace of Mind (tumblr) (Ao3) - mshenko; gift fic for @Cardhwion on AO3 for ShenkoSummer 2023. Kaidan navigates painful memories to figure out he’s in love

Small Comforts (tumblr) (Ao3) - fshenko; gift fic @palimpsetus on AO3 for ShenkoSummer 2023: Kaidan gets his ass kicked in beach volleyball and then breaks into a lighthouse.

Ticking Like A (tumblr) (Ao3) - Joker & Vega; gift fic for @vesperfloyd for the Hatboy Exchange 2023; James isn’t alright after Sanctuary, and Joker pushes him to figure out why

The Longest Night (tumblr) (Ao3) - mshenko; Kaidan deals with the guilt of surviving Virmire by holding vigil on the longest night; because sometimes you have to wait for the light

As the Revel Meets the Day (tumblr) (Ao3) - mshenko; Four times someone sees Shepard in pain, and one time Shepard finally, finally has peace; because sometimes you get to see the light return

Dragon Age fics What Bards Sing About (tumblr) (Ao3) - Lacklon/Roland; four times during the show Lacklon notices Roland and blames it on his legs

Of Butterflies and Flying Dwarves (tumblr) (Ao3) - Lacklon/Roland; because there’s nothing funnier than putting a dwarf on a hoverboard

It’s Just a Rock, Man (tumblr) (Ao3) - Lacklon/Roland; how to court your Orlesian boyfriend in the most ridiculous way possible.

Essays When Genocide Is The Best Option (tumblr) - my attempt to piece together my thoughts about the ending of Mass Effect 3, complete with references to Stranger Than Fiction and Samuel Beckett

#mass effect #dragon age #my writing

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ljandersen · 4 years ago

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Writing Tag Game

Tagged by @jicklet Thank you for thinking of me! This is a fun one.

Tagging: @ripley95 @rpgwrites @alphahelices @shifty-looking-sheep @laelior @mallaidhsomo @ariadnewordweaver @illusivesoul @mordinette @aricazorel @becauseanders @a-cosmic-elf @jedirangerpenguin @crqstalite @sundogsandrainbows @miniature-space-hamster and anyone else who wants to play! No pressure. Also, let me know if you prefer I didn’t tag you in games.

How many works do you have on AO3?

Eight (2 epics, 3 one-shots, 3 multichaper)

What’s your total AO3 word count?

790,059 posted words

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. About Mars (ME3 fShenko, 66k): 157

2. The Favorite (ME1 femShep/Garrus vs femShep/Wrex, 2.5k): 156

3. Sideways (12 years post-war fShenko original series, 379 k, currently posting): 155

4. The Limited Edition Spaceship (ME1 fShenko, 1k): 122

5. Burning Barriers (post-war fShenko original series, 300k): 99

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Of course! My sole reason for posting fanfic is the interaction.

Investing energy into a comment and hearing silence is discouraging. It’s the same discouragement writers feel after investing energy into a story and hearing nothing.

No one is owed a story, and no one is owed a comment. But, I think without connecting with other fans through leaving comments and responding to comments, fanfiction wouldn’t exist. The gift economy would crumble.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

All my stories have happy endings. The exceptions would probably be “About Horizon” and “About Mars,” because they’re leading into other stories.

“About Horizon” leads into ME3, where Kaidan and Shepard are at odds (like the game). “About Mars” ends with Shepard left on the exploding Crucible and the Normandy stranded on an unknown planet (like the game).

What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

“Eighteen Years and Five Months.” It’s my only pure-fluff fic. It ends with Shepard finding family and home again.

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

No. With rare exception, it’s not for me.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

No. I’ve received concrit, but it wasn’t said with hate or malice.

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

No. I write love scenes, but they’re not graphic.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware. That would be like ripping a writer’s heart from their chest. I can’t imagine anything worse.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

No. I’ve had a few requests. While flattered, I'm not interested. I have reasons, but I won’t go into them here. I now have a statement on my AO3 profile preemptively clarifying that I don’t want translations of my fics.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No. It could be fun, but I’m not good about dividing myself between projects.

What’s your all-time favorite ship?

FemShep/Kaidan Alenko

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I only post finished works. I have some unfinished stories in notebooks. There’s a ME1 one-shot where Shepard, Garrus, and Kaidan are trapped in the mako as it dangles on the side of a lava tube. I like it, but there’s an important joke that only works when spoken aloud. Spelled out on paper, a big part of the story falls flat. I’ve never finished it for that reason.

What are your writing strengths?

Banter and plotting.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Prose and action scenes. Practice, practice, practice.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

Generally, I don’t like it.

If the point of view character knows the language, I prefer it be translated for the reader with a “ . . . the character said in German.” If the point of view characters doesn’t know the language, I prefer it simply be stated that a character spoke in German. Body language and tone of voice can hint at what that person means.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Mass Effect

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Sideways

#meme #fanfic meme #Mass Effect #on mass effect fanfiction #my writing #Thanks for the tag!#long post

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ljandersen · 4 years ago

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More 100 Days of Writing! Yay! I love that I get a hundred days of seeing everyone's writing process on my dash. I’m not strictly following the questions in order or posting every day, but it’s fun to still play along. Thanks, @the-wip-project !

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Question from Day 2 (I know it’s not day two, but I’m erratically cheating, remember?) For your current WIP: Do you have many WIPs? What motivates you to write this specific story? What makes this story special for you? Is there a special twist/trope/setting you wanted to explore? What got you started on this particular story?

My current WIP is “Sideways,” a 5-part fShenko post-war long fic. I’m posting it like a box set, essentially all the parts (books) in one big post on AO3. I have the first draft written for all five parts and am currently posting part 3.

What motivated me to write this story was a string of “what if” questions that haunted me after finishing my 300k fShenko post-war long fic, “Burning Barriers.” My mind kept spinning on questions about human-asari relationships. What would it be like to be with someone who would live a thousand years? You’re just a blip on their radar, while they’re you’re whole life.

What would it be like to have a child who’s another species? Asari have unique abilities like mindmelding, strong biotics, long lifespan, monogendered, not to mention unique culture. Would the child feel less “yours” for being so . . . well, alien (pun intended)? How would it feel knowing your partner and child would live on long after you?

That’s when I started thinking, what if the asari parent died? Whoa. Then my mind was blown by the complexity. Your child would be another species, bound to live a thousand years, and the parent meant to take care of them is gone. Since your partner was going to live hundreds of more years, the human partner probably never even considered the possibility of losing them. Now the human parent is all this alien child has. It had so many implications, my mind kept going.

I wanted to explore these ideas in a story, but I didn’t want to write an AU of my own fanfiction. I didn’t want to write a story that wasn’t fShenko. FemShep and Kaidan are my favorite characters, and it’s their relationship I find compelling.

That’s when I thought, what would Shepard think of this alternate storyline? It’s interesting enough to think of her outside perspective, but what if it was further removed than even that. What if she saw it like I did having this other canon story ending in mind? What if the Shepard who finished my story in “Burning Barriers” and who ended up with Kaidan went to this other AU reality?

I could follow an idea from “Burning Barriers” that wasn’t realized but intrigued me. Kaidan’s asari wife is dead. He has an asari child now. How much better if he and Shepard are even enemies? Maybe Shepard has been a bad person in this timeline. After all, Mass Effect is all about the Paragon and Renegade timelines. Add in this story being told from the POV of the Shepard who’s been happily married to him in the “real” timeline, then the complexity and nuances expanded. How would she reconcile his identity to her, being both the person she knows and loves the best, but also the person she knows the least and who is also an adversary?

Then, I thought . . . What is Bad Shepard took my canon Shepard’s place? I ended “Burning Barriers” with Shepard being human Councilor. She lives on the Pacific with Kaidan and their daughter. That was already there in my post-10 year epilogue. What if this switch went both ways? It’s always a fascinating trope taking someone who’s a maverick loner and dropping them into a family situation. Do they become a better person?

False identities always interest me, and both stories lines would play so well to that interest. How would this imposter function? Both Shepards would be taken as the their altero ego, at least, initially if not longer.

So I started writing “Sideways.” I needed to tell the backstories to fill in the ten years of lost time for both timelines. But how to do it? Just through present-day revelations? A bit boring. Flashbacks are often considered unnecessary and needlessly complicate a story.

What if the flashbacks had more meaning beyond just revealing the past though? What if they provided a ticking clock. I needed a ticking clock, after all, and this was the perfect way to hit two birds with one stone. The present day revelations about the past could provide tantalizing clues and hint toward scenes that aren’t revealed yet. There would be gradual progression of stories from the past connecting to the present storyline. Perfect.

I actually wrote several chapters of “Sideways” and then discarded it. I didn’t want to pour myself into more fanfiction. It was time to move on. Do something original. Who would read a long fShenko fic that jumped off my 300k story? “Burning Barriers” wasn’t read. I think a year after posting, it had 25 kudos, under a thousand hits, and was pretty stagnant with the hit count even moving. I had a few wonderful people who made the process worthwhile through their generous comments and friendship. It would go on to get a lot of great feedback that would change my feelings about it, but at the time, the story’s reception was disappointing. It seemed unwise to take an already abysmal turnout for 300k words and cut the readership even further for a new story +100k story. So I tossed my first few chapters of “Sideways” aside.

I came across the chapters again a while later. I still had these ideas in my head for it that I was trying to squelch while I focused on ideas for an original sci fi series. When I was flipping through a notebook, I came across the story I had abandoned, and I started to read it. By the end, I was left thinking, “But then what happened? This is actually pretty good.” At that point, I decided I had to write it. I had too much passion in the project, and I had to see it through.

I decided for it to be successful (or at least, not catastrophically unsuccessful), it had to stand on its own. Hardly anyone had read the preceding 300 k story, which I had made the mistake of posting all at once. I needed this to be its own story. It had to be less words than “Burning Barriers,” which at 300 k was already too much of an investment.

Then I started writing my new story . . . 800 k words later (or so I estimate), I obviously didn’t meet my goal. But I loved writing every word, and I love how the story progresses and develops. It had a good pace, and I’m proud of it. It lent itself naturally to being divided into a series, since it had mini-arcs with mini-villains and achievements being reached. By editing each part separately, I was able to start posting, which after two years of writing the story was beginning to feel like would never happen.

Now, here I am posting part 3. I have amazing people who support me and have made the experience rewarding by sharing their enthusiasm and thoughts in comments and tags. “Sideways” surpassed “Burning Barriers” initially low turn out and has managed to stand on its own as I hoped. For a story that took so long to make it to this point, it’s been fulfilling to have so many fandom friends who cheer me on. I appreciate everyone who supports “Sideway” and just me in general as part of the fandom community.

And that’s how my supersized story came into being.

#100daysofwriting #not doing my questions in order I know #I feel like day 1 and day 2 were the most important general questions #Which is why I'm doing them now #on writing #my writing #on fanfiction #on mass effect fanfiction

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ljandersen · 4 years ago

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Author Interview

Tagged by @rpgwrites @bardofheartdive @forlornmelody Thank you!

Tagging @ripley95 @alphahelices @spook-queen @crqstalite @citadelsushi @spaceprincealenko @pip-n-flinx @soldiermom1973 @a-cosmic-elf and anyone else who wants to play! No obligation, of course.

1. Name

LJAndersen on AO3, FFN, and Tumblr

2. Fandom

Mass Effect Trilogy. That's it. I have narrow interests.

3. Where you post?

AO3 and Tumblr

I have stories on FFN but no longer post there. After spending months posting a ten chapter story and not getting a single follow or like/favorite, I decided it wasn't worth it. Due to dead traffic, security concerns, and disagreeing with FFN philosophy in general, I stopped posting there early 2020.

4. Most popular one shot?

The Favorite . Garrus and Wrex are jealous and humorously fighting over femShep. It has a couple things going for it: it's my only non-fShenko fic and it has a Femshep/Garrus tag.

5. Most popular multichapter fic?

About Mars . . . It's my ME-3 fic with background scenes, not a retelling of the plot. Shepard and Kaidan get back together, and there are a lot of light-hearted crew antics.

6. Actual worst part of writing?

Editing! The more passes and more nitty gritty, the more painful it becomes. I'm on my third draft of part 2 of "Sideways" right now. The struggle is real.

7. Favorite story you've written?

Sideways. Twelve years post-war, Paragon and Renegade Shepard switch timelines. I love the complexity of relationships the situation creates. In her timeline, Paragon Shepard has been married to Kaidan for a decade. They have a child together. The galaxy is at peace. She's human councilor. Thrust into the renegade timeline, the galaxy is torn apart by war. Kaidan has lead a whole life without Shepard, and in fact, despises her.

I love the layers of clashing identities. She knows Kaidan better than anyone, while simultaneously knowing nothing about him in this context. Does she care for him as a version of her husband or treat him like the enemy he treats her?

In the past, I would have said my favorite fic was Burning Barriers, my 2 years post-war epic. Shepard and Kaidan are estranged but forced to work together as Spectres. It's the first fic I wrote.

At this point, I've spent so much time on Sideways, it's really a toss up now. I could say a lot about Sideway's genesis and my intentions, but needless to say, it took me a year and a half to write. I'm still editing it in parts.

8. Story you were most nervous to post?

Burning Barriers. It was the first thing I wrote that I let anyone read. As far as being nervous about content, there are some chapters in "Sideways" that worry me. Later parts earn the M rating.

9. How do you choose your titles?

With difficulty. I try to be literal and direct as much as I possible.

10. Complete work:

7 completed works posted (4 multichapter and 3 one shots)

11. Incomplete works:

Only 1 work in the process of posting. I've written the whole first draft of Sideways, but I'm editing and posting a chapter weekly. I also have a half finished mini-multichapter fic. I'm not sure if or when I'll get back to it.

12. Do you outline?

No. I know what I want to write in my head. Putting an outline down in writing ruins the drive for me. I feel like the story is already told, even if it's only a skeletal bulletpointed list. What keeps me going is love of the discovery. I love the spontaneous depth that forms step by step from the vision in my head.

13. Coming soon ideas?

I'm focused on Sideways currently. I do have the short multichapter fic I mentioned that I may or may not finish. I also outlined a multichapter fShenko involving the control ending. Since I outlined it, though, I kinda feel like my interest is satiated. After Sideways, I'm planning to focus on indie publishing.

14. Ask me anything.

Yes, ask me anything. What does this question even mean?

15. Best writing trait?

I like creating plots that provide the scaffolding to explore and stretch character relationships. I love dialogue. It can do so many things at once: reveal character, develop relationships, advance the plot.

16. Upcoming story you are excited to write?

I'm focused on editing not writing right now. Sideways is essentially a five novel series. While I may write additional scenes as I edit, I don't have plans to write anything new for a while. I am looking forward to doing my second draft of part 3 and part 4. It's always fun revisiting the first draft. It's been a long time since I first wrote it.

17. Spicy tangential opinion?

I'm glad Bioware fixed the controls for the mako. As a PC player, it was impossible and took the fun out of exploring planets. I'll miss the inside jokes about Shep's driving, but I'm all for improvement in actual gameplay. I'm glad they didn't change anything story or character wise.

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ljandersen · 4 years ago

Note

Wednesday, Saturday, Friday, September, ancient, please and thank you. :)

Thank you for the ask! These are so much fun. I love when writer/fic ask lists are circulating. It’s fascinating learning about everyone’s writing. Anyway, this is from the Fanfic Questions Themed Around Time.

Wednesday: name a fic which you have posted which you think is underrated?

That would probably be “Burning Barriers.” It’s 300 k words and the first fic I ever posted. It’s the reason I got into fanfiction. I didn’t feel closure with the ending of ME-3.

I wanted to give Shepard and Kaidan one more epic mission for a real grand finale and better ending. I posted it all in one go, which didn’t give it much exposure. It’s also plot-heavy, which isn’t everyone’s cup of tea.

Saturday: what gets you excited whilst writing?

It’s the same thing I enjoy when reading. I want to know what happens, or perhaps more precisely, how it will happen. I have a vague idea of the major plot points. I always know my ending, but I love discovering and fleshing out the story along the way. Quiet character moments with my OTP are my favorite, but I love those best in the context of a rich plot. The action and angst give those moments more depth and meaning for me.

Friday: most self-indulgent fic you have ever posted?

Hmm, probably “Sideways.” I really, really didn’t want to write that story. I felt like I should be moving on to original fic. If I wrote more fanfic, I wanted it to be short and be geared toward what would be popular. I wanted to make it worth the effort, I guess.

“Sideways” was long, but it was also plot heavy, which isn’t particularly popular in fanfic, I think. It also had the major drawback of following after my other post-war long fic “Burning Barriers.” “Burning Barriers” itself wasn’t very popular and dividing that readership even further felt really foolhardy for the effort. Ultimately, I was able to write “Sideways” in a way that it stood alone which was key.

I loved writing “Sideways,” but it truly was self-indulgent. I couldn’t get these big ideas out of my head. I finally gave into getting them on paper. It’s means a lot being able to share my story with readers. I’m glad I wrote it, despite my reservations.

September: share a comment or review which still warms your heart?

Ooh, I have so many amazing comments people have left me. It’s like choosing a favorite star or something. I do worry a bit about embarrassing mutuals by posting one of their comments, so I’ll choose one left by a guest recently.

I have never left a comment on a story before, but I've realized that good fanfic writers aren't given nearly enough recognition. So here goes. Wow! I started reading Sideways a few months ago and I am hooked! In my first read through (which was less like reading and more like devouring) The Tog was the latest chapter posted.

What an incredible action scene. I never really thought about how difficult it must be to write such a scene well. It's fresh and unpredictable, the detail is just right so I can easily visualize what is happening, and the tension kept me on the edge of my seat throughout. The character's decisions and actions are logical for soldiers. There were no moments where I thought "well, why didn't Shepard just do X and save herself two broken femurs?". I also love the little sprinklings of things this Shepard knows about Kaidan; like knowing that he was about to Throw her out of the way.

Then the cliffhanger? Once I read The Tog I had to start waiting for a chapter per week. It was torture! I have since implemented a rationing strategy to stop myself going as crazy. This involves re-reading Burning Barriers and Sideways VERY SLOWLY.

Thank you for an excellent chapter that I regularly revisit. And thank you for creating and sharing this epic story, for free.

It meant a lot to me that the commenter would work up the courage to leave a comment for the first time. It was surprising and deeply meaningful to discover someone had been reading my story for months and enjoying it to that level.

Ancient: the first fic you ever posted online?

It was “Burning Barriers.” It was my fShenko ending. It just took 300k words and a lot of action and angst to feel fully satisfied.

Thank you for the ask!!!

#ask meme #meme #my writing

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ljandersen · 4 years ago

Note

2, 5, 17, 20, & 35 for the fic writer asks!

Thank you for all the fun questions!!! These always get me thinking. So fun. By the way, I still love your cat picture icon so much. He looks like he wants a good pet. Anyway . . . This is from the Fic Writer Ask Game

2. How do you spend your time when it comes to fanfiction? Are you primarily a fic reader, writer, or a perfect 50/50 split of both?

This is really variable. I’d say the biggest determiner is where I’m at in the writing process on my long fic. The first draft is creatively demanding. It requires creative intensity and long chunks of alone time. I’m not posting it at that point, so it’s all at my own pace. No pressure. I get a lot more fanfic reading done, because I just don’t have the creative energy or environment/situation to invest in writing my first draft. Instead that time goes to reading. During the first draft, I’m probably about a 50/50 split between writing and reading.

When I’m in the editing stage, I write more than I read. I’m posting now, which gives me the added pressure of having a deadline. Most significantly, though, I can work on editing during periods I previously couldn’t with the first draft -- like after work or when my husband’s doing a loud project or if I only have a small window of time. Those were periods, I would choose to read fic, because I didn’t have the energy for creativity. But since editing requires less creativity, I can use that time now for editing.

For almost a year I’ve been focused exclusively on editing, which means I’ve focused more on writing (editing) than reading fic. I still do plenty of reading, of course. It feels good supporting other writers in the community. But I do use most of my time to keep on editing.

5. What are your fanfic pet peeves? Do they have a huge effect on whether or not you decide to read something?

OOC and character bashing are a big nope for me. This is especially bothersome where they occur together, a character presented as OOC to be bashed.

I also don’t like unhealthy relationship dynamics portrayed as romantic or hot. For instance, a character being jealousy, possessive, domineering, and controlling. I don’t like choking, punishing, or any physical aggressiveness in intimacy occurring without obvious mutual consent, where both partners feel safe, respected, and desire the encounter in the ways its happening. This is in the context of it being condoned or romanticized by the story (vs. the sense a story considers it wrong or having the POV of an unreliable narrator you’re meant to disagree with). I actually stumble upon this quite a bit in the fShenko fandom, and it’s not for me.

17. How obsessively do you sit and stare at your fic after you’ve just posted and wait for feedback?

I’m like everyone else, I think. I check it a lot. Probably way more than I should. It’s influenced a lot by what I’m posting. With one-shots I’ll let myself check more often. But with a long-fic update, it’s important to curb the impulse.

For a one shot, new kudos flood in. Refreshing the screen is rewarding, because you have a good chance of discovering you have a new kudos or even a comment. The repeated checking is positively reinforced. I also invest less effort into a one-shot. The stakes are lower. For me, one-shots have high instant reward with that flood of stats and low-risk for disappointment with the lower effort investment. For that reason, I let myself check more often with a one-shot. Checking generally leads to more positive feelings and adds to the fun.

With a long fic, you don’t see an uptick of kudos necessarily. If you’ve been posting for a while, you may go several updates without a new kudos. Hits are kind of irrelevant. I don’t know what they mean. That leaves comments as the only significant factor to check. A comment on my long fic means a lot to me, more than stats on a one-shot. I’ve invest a lot. Refreshing the screen becomes a low-reaping high-reward situation. I feel like emotions are more up and down. Disappointment is a greater risk and constant checking becomes maladaptive. For that reason, I make a conscious effort to not check as often with a long fic update.

20. What’s your favorite part about the fanfiction writing process?

I enjoy writing the first draft, and I enjoy interacting with people after I post it. Enjoying the first draft applies to both fanfiction and original writing. I think the posting part is where fanfiction really shines, because there’s overlapping interest and interaction within a community.

There’s an idea that the last stage of art is to be experienced. I think that’s true. Dedicating yourself to writing a story is wonderful. It’s an accomplishment. For me, the project doesn’t have closure or feel fully gratificating until it’s read. It could be even one person IRL, but that part of sharing it and hearing back is meaningful. I think that makes posting my favorite part of the writing process specific to fanfiction.

35. How much has writing fic changed your life?

Writing fic let me feel like I was accomplishing something. I’d become disillusioned with work. My investment and skill didn’t matter at work, and I needed an area in my life where I could work toward something and feel accomplished. Fanfic isn’t a big achievement, I suppose, but I’ve developed my writing skills. I had never let anyone read my writing before, and it was an accomplishment in itself finding the confidence to share my story for a reader. I’ve also met friends through fanfiction, which has added to the experience in such a positive way. There have been a lot of changes for the positive.

I would say one change to the negative is that people IRL don’t take my writing seriously anymore. It’s kind of bizarre to me that as an amateur writing original work, which never gets finished and is never shared, my hobby was regarded as more worthwhile than now with writing fanfiction, even though my stories now do get completed and are actually read by others. That’s been the only negative.

On any account, the change has by far mostly been to the positive. The support and comments people have given me, especially on Burning Barriers and Sideways, has given me a lot of gratification and confidence in my writing.

Thank you for the ask!!!

#ask #ask meme #my writing

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ljandersen · 5 years ago

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Author Interview

Thank you for tagging me @painterofhorizons @rpgwarrior4824 @ripley95things This looked familiar. When I looked back, I realized I had done this meme before, but I realized a lot has changed. Instead of reblogging, I decided to do an update.

I know some of you may have already done this meme, but I’ll go ahead and tag: @pigeontheoneandonly @spook-queen @maxrev @swaps55 @soldiermom1973 @salamanders-please @ooachilliaoo @citadelsushi @that-wasnt-so-bad @aricazorel @pushingsian @shotce @forlornmelody @serioussamiam @xenowriter and anyone else who wants to play. No obligation, of course. If anyone follows me who would enjoy being tagged in these games, just let me know. I’ll add you in the future. Likewise, if someone would rather I didn’t continue tagging them games, let me know that too.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Name: LJAndersen

Fandoms: Mass Effect Trilogy

Where You Post: AO3 and FFN (I’m not planning to post on FFN in the future. The decision is multi-factorial -- low traffic, security issues, and disapproval of their business philosophy)

Most Popular One-Shot: The Favorite It’s a Garrus/femShep and Wrex/femShep love triangle one shot set during ME-1 (humorous rivalry and grudging friendship). I wrote it for the 2019 Christmas gift exchange. Naturally, since it’s (slightly) Shakarian, it has the best stats.

Most Popular Multi-Chapter Story: “About Mars . . .” It’s my ME-3 fShenko story that fills in gaps. I explore Shepard and Kaidan's reconciliation and how Tali and Garrus got together. It’s a lot of crew antics: the space hamster escaping, Christmas gift exchange, matchmaking trickery, drunk poker celebration, raiding the mess at night. It’s fun and fluffy with a touch of angst and bittersweetness. When it comes to why it’s the most popular, it’s a combination I think. It’s the last thing I posted and readership is probably highest on the last thing a writer posts, if they post consistently. It’s the longest story I’ve post chapter by chapter giving it more search air time. It’s fluffy/slight angsty and relationship-centered, which is probably more in line with what the average fanfic reader is looking to read (vs. something plot-heavy and involved).

Favorite Story You Wrote: “Burning Barriers” It’s my fShenko ME epic set post-war, action/adventure romance with some mystery and suspense thrown in. It’s actually three novel-length stories bound together: Shepard’s first mission aboard the Normandy after defeating the reapers, retrieving an artifact to restore the Sol relay. Kaidan’s Spectre investigation into what happened to Shepard on the Normandy and confronting his ghosts on Jump Zero. The last part is Kaidan and Shepard’s POV overlapping. It’s a joint Spectre investigation, sparked from what they learned in other parts, and their efforts to stop a catastrophic attack targeting the Council in Vancouver. It’s my favorite story, since it has an original plot, and I had freedom to stretch and explore the characters past canon.

Story You Were Nervous to Post: I haven’t been nervous posting my stories beyond the fear of hearing silence. There have been chapters or subplot directions where I wasn’t sure of the readers’ reactions. For a story as a whole, though, I haven’t been especially anxious, at least, not about living up to a standard or receiving hate for my story. What makes me anxious when posting is what makes all writers anxious. We all worry our hard work will be lost in the void. No one will read it. We won’t get feedback. I get anxious I’m wasting my time on something that won’t matter to anyone but me.

How You Choose Your Titles: I don’t have a method or a pattern. It’s what fits the story. Sometimes it pops out, an obvious phrase, and sometimes it’s a labor in discarding and narrowing ideas. Honestly, I don’t think any of my titles are particularly spectacular.

Complete: Six completed stories posted (2 one-shots and 4 multichapter fics)

Incomplete: None that are posted. My long-term WIP, “Someplace Like Home,” is in the second-draft stage. I don’t post until I’ve finished a story and edited it.

Do You Outline? No. I know the ending of my story and I know the beats I want to hit along the way, but I’m more of a discovery writer. I make up as I go how the points connect. It feels more organic and surprising. When I’ve tried outlining a story, it becomes mechanical and joyless. Since I do intensive editing after the first draft, I can fix the mistakes I create in discovering the story as I write it. After the first draft is written, I can streamline, reshape, and trim the story into something more polished.

Coming Soon/Not Yet Started: I have a few one-shot ideas, even one I’ve started, but my main push is to get my long project to a point of posting. “Someplace Like Home” took a year and a half to write, and I’m finally in the second draft stage. Since it’s such a large piece, I’m planning on breaking the story into parts. I’m focusing on completing a second draft of part 1, then I’ll do a third draft and start posting it. While posting part 1, I can work on the second and third draft of the next section. It’s been a long effort to get it this far, and it will feel kind of surreal to have a part of it finished.

Do You Accept Prompts? I had a reader say she’d enjoy seeing my take on Horizon and Mars, which actually led me to write my multichapter fics “About Horizon . . .” and “About Mars . . .” It was a nice break from writing my plot-heavy main WIP. I’d never considered writing anything set in-game, because it felt too restrictive and redundant for how I like to write. From that reader’s encouragement, though, I actually ended up writing something I never would have considered writing before. That’s the closest I’ve come to receiving a prompt. I would eagerly accept them, of course, and be flattered. I couldn’t promise I’d do them right now. I have a lot of emphasis in my larger project right now.

Most Excited to Write: Though the first draft of “Someplace Like Home” is written, I’m excited to write the second draft. Since I know the whole story as whole now, it’s fun to flesh out the second draft, add more foreshadowing and create some irony. It’s been fun rereading my story as I do the second draft. The third draft, though, which is less broad in scope, more paragraph/sentence level will be like pulling teeth. I love to tell a story, but I hate nitpicking the way it’s told. It’s an important focus of editing, though, and certainly an area where I need the most work.

#author interview #meme #Mass Effect #Fanfiction

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