#wowww. dude
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ohhh wow. Heart swelled.
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i <3 drew gooden
#truly as ive grown a lil ive found his content to be so superior to that of other commentary youtubers#he just genuinely puts thought and effort into his video topics#instead of like picking a bad movie at random to just sit there and say wowww this is bad! about#not to say hes Never done that because he has#but his past like year or two of videos has been so stellar#also i do like bad movie videos admittedly but someeee youtubers got so lazy with them#like intentionally taking every joke in a bad movie so literally and out of faith that its like ok dude cmon
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Being a skinny white man really is a privilege because how do some of them have fans dedicated enough to defend them so hard when they aren't even talented
#this guy?? ur wasting ur time on THIS guy??#wowww#at least pick a more talented white dude to admire my goodness
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ive got brian and jay on the brain but i feel like brian would really like the excitement of potentially getting caught during sex, and then that + jay absolutely needing to bite the shit out of his partner and leave as many hickies as possible would make for a. very fun combination.
ohh fuck yes. ive always kinda hced jay w a possession/marking thing esp in the context of being exhibitionisty abt it .. bruising somebody up so all of campus knows theyre his .. im just thinking abt alex giving brian a hard time on set abt how hes gonna have to go to the drugstore and get concealer like tonight like now and could he please pass a message along to whoever did that from brian's director that he would so appreciate it if his male lead wasn't showing up looking like a tramp every other night. while jays sitting in the room with them pretending to work on the script n giggling to himself bc he warned brian this would happen and he still wanted it. fuckin freak lol.
#g.txt#nsft#love the thought of them just working this out abt each other and being so delighted ab it . jay apologizing he fucked brians neck up so ba#and then noticing hes getting sorta flustered abt it. brian catching jays eye mid conversation abt how wowww somebody had a good night huh#and jay inserting himself as close to brian as physically possible putting his arm around him n shit#ohh yeah haha he sure did. uh huh. hey uh bri i need ur help w shit in the kitchen :) so sorry abt that#big sweet sub dude x tiny possessive/sadistic freak is so good always. esp when the sub is a little weirder but they hide it better#bray
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doing the equivalent of gripping something intensely hard then forcing myself to let it go every time i see something about the stupid fandom drama i got pulled into earlier this year
#nothing bad ppl just... bringing up its existence...AGAIN......#every time i see it i wanna go on a rant for a billion years but the worst place to do that would be on tumblr#I rly don't wanna see anyone talking abt it unless it's to criticize the ppl who started the false accusations or to apologize to us#for the harassment#Buster: You Really Think Someone Would Do That? Just Go On the Internet and Tell Lies?#anyway I cant believe ive had the misfortune of interacting w some1 who has to b vindictive toward others to quell their own insecurity#to accuse us of racism because he wasn't allowed to be in a personal friends discord group...#and then saying that we didn't wanna let him in bc he wasn't a 'popular' account? 1. he has way more followers than some ppl in the server#hence why he was able to get so many ppl to attack us#2. he can't keep his own story straight. First we're racist then we're ableist then we gatekeep popularity?#Dude... we don't like you because you're vindictive and take minor slights way too personally...hence...everything that fucking happened#anyway idk who reported him but i thank them for it and i hope that was worth their account getting suspended for getting paid to harass us#to anyone outside of all this reading this mess... please question the validity of ppls accounts if they don't offer concrete proof#and the only proof is based on assuming that certain actions COULD POSSIBLY line up to the accusations#this includes if multiple people have the same accusation without proof because that's EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED#except it was dumber because several of their accusations literally contradicted themselves#wowww people apologized and informed their audience about possible microagressions once they were informed. they MUST be racist!#and if you don't want to dig into it that deep..then by all means mind your own damn business before you join in on someone else's witchhun
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Xx feel asleep during the M2 redflag, had a dream Lopez took Acosta out, everytime I woke back up I saw it was still M2 I went "wahh!! Acosta's out DAMN you Lopez" and went back to sleep.......properly woke up and you wouldn't believe it but Mr Peter Accosts was still there
#it was a fucking mental dream#there was massive monkeys on track fighting the riders#which MAYBE should've been a indication that it wasn't real but uh worked 8 hours in a supermarket yesterday and slept 4 hours xx#funniest part of the dream was when acosta n Lopez got back to garages loads of dudes (who'd been taken out by monkeys)#were tryna stop acosta n Lopez greeting eachother but then Lopez got through and he *hugged* Acosta#except he just headlocked Acosta and picked him up like that for a few seconds n then the commentary was like#*wowww Lopez is so niceee!! see hes apologising to acosta 🥰🥰🥰* while acosta dangled like a Mii#its not a big ask to have normal dreams please bro#moto2#pedro acosta#alonso lopez
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Tbh I'd marry them if they propose me with a tomato ring
#i forgot the whole buon san valentino thing but why did germany suddenly propose to italy#AND WITH A TOMATO RING??#if i coulr remember correctly#italy gave him a flower bouquet during valentines day(?)#germany misunderstood it and thought that it was a confession#so uh he read books about relationship#AND STRAIGHT UP BOUGHT A RING?? WOWWW#my man dude you know that romantic relationship comes first before engagement and yeahh#eh i can't blame him i would be comfused too when someone bought me a bouquet#wait no back then austria marries countries even without relationships needed#though it might be an arranged marriage?#it rrally goes through the genes man
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having your formative years coincide with when a common style of cinematography in a lot of places was wacky perspective and claustrophobic extreme wide-angle/fisheye lens and being sat down in front of the television a lot was damaging. now look. you've made a person who likes the audiovisual material of they might be giants.
#I just answered an ask on my sideblog. and it got me thinking!#I have a big fondness of that style because it's nostalgic. in a ''feels like coming home'' sort of way?#which probably sounds overly sentimental lol. but it does! early influences are powerful#dude if you've never thought about this before go look at like. commercials. comedy/kid's films and their posters from the '90s/y2k#basically anything designed to be radical or alternative or offbeat. there are are so many tight oblique angles and in-your-face camerawork#oh and Really high saturation!#what Started that?#the best I can find is director hype williams kickstarting the fisheye trend in music videos so? maybe it spread through his influence#(me describing styles any buff would already know about) wowww. fascinating
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ah
i remember why i deleted tiktok now
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somesquib got mad at you for coining from a media you don't know fully or at all?? wtf
a simple "hey! this info is wrong its actually [correct info] /nm :)" like it's not that hard to be decent..
i have never seen anything about it ever and its like "OUHHHH I MUST RESIST THE URGE TO POINT OUT YOU DID IT WRONG" yeah ok i already know. the characters look exactly the same. bro
#‹ 📻 › .. Your Host ;; Dirk#‹ 📞 › .. Caller ;; squidken#i deleted the icons bc wowww i dont have the energy to see everypony repeatedly point out my mistake#like dude i KNOW#only everypony and their mom pointed it out#rant
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OH.
Ohh
Oh man
Oh I'm so dumb it was in front my face
Agh
Sorry I have to make another mil.aowm post later I
Damn
#laying facedown on the ground have a breakdown wowww#upsetti spaghetti#my dudes im.not character analysis person i do visuals#theres like 1 or 2 other people who do on tumblr but theyre not active rn im scream#for mil.aowm#i feel like i wouldve made this conclusion faster if i were#(kit)^2
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god he's such a cute character
#talk tag#they wrote him so well like dude me too. ''see you later'' wowww they wanna see me again later yayy YAYY ^_^
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i can't word this right cause my thoughts are all over the place rn but im gonna try to articulate it best i can
steve & reece wrote two episodes that are very much parallels of each other; one was blatantly about a couple - they shared a kiss, one massaged the other - while the other episode was about a friendship ( that was loaded with subtext ) and yet the former was just. a lie. the entire fucking time. but the latter was raw and honest and This Is What Love Actually Is
#i'm sorry i'm so bad at putting my thoughts together but wowww dude do you see it too#bcdr#tlw#she speaks
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Never Have I Ever // Jey Uso x Reader
Author's Note -> So I had this interesting little idea and figured I'd write it out for y'all... not sure how I feel about it yet but lmk if you like it 🤭 Oh! I have a masterlist now too, so you can check out some other stories I did recently :) happy reading!
Plot -> An innocent game leads to a new first, and new love.
Pairings -> Jey Uso x Fem!Reader (Y/N)
Warnings -> Drinking, Cursing, Hickies, Oral (Fem!Receiving), Unprotected P in V, Creampie, Not Proofread, MDNI
Word Count -> 3.3k
Game Night. The one night a month where you, Josh, Jon, Trin, Joe, and Galina could have a night to yourselves. No kids, no wrestling events to stress over, just drinks and quality time with your people. You met them through work, and although you were part of the production crew you ended up clicking with them right away. Whenever you all were inevitably on the road for shows, you traveled together, stayed at the same hotel, ventured the cities together, you had basically become part of the family.
Game Night originally started as a couples get-together for Jon, Trin, Joe, and Galina but seeing as you and Josh were always around they happily extended the invitation to you two, despite both of you being single.
You were close with everybody in the group, but yours and Josh’s relationship was by far closer than the relationships you had with the others. Josh was the first WWE superstar to greet you on your first day on the job, showing you around and helping you get acclimated to your new work environment. Within the span of a couple weeks he was inviting you to family events, and the rest is history.
After helping yourself to a mixed drink in Joe and Galina's kitchen, you made your way back to the living room where everyone was congregated as they were trying to figure out the next game to play. “Why don’t we spice it up?” Trin suggested, “how about a game of ‘Never Have I Ever’?”
“Jesus, Trin. What are we, high schoolers?” You chimed in, “Might as well get a bottle out and start spinning it too.”
“Oh c’mon, Y/N, live a little,” she teased, “Sounds to me like you’ve got some secretssss!”
“Ugh, fine, whatever. Start already, before you kill my buzz.”
One by one everyone started taking turns going in a circle stating things they hadn’t done before; some sexual, some embarrassing, and some targeted to get certain players to put their fingers down. After a few rounds everyone in the group only had one finger remaining, and it was your turn. All you had to do was give one confession and everybody would be out of the game, making you the winner. You being as competitive as you were, you saved the best one for last. And you knew it would get everyone out. “Okay umm,” you paused dramatically even though you knew what you were going to say, “Never have I ever… received head.”
You smiled triumphantly as one by one, the group started putting down their fingers. Choruses of “Wowww, you had to go there,” “That’s so unfair,” and strings of curses came from everybody. Everybody except Josh.
“Nah, uce. That means nobody wins. Ma, the whole point of the game is to say somethin’ you haven’t done. You gotta put a finger down.”
“I know the rules, Josh,” you retorted, “I did say something I haven’t done. Which means I win.” “Wait, wait, wait. Girl, you’ve never had a man eat you out?” Trin asked shocked, her question making everyone realize what you had just said.
Josh interjects before you can respond, seemingly annoyed, “She has, Trin, she’s bullshittin’ rn. Because there ain’t no way-”
“There is a way, Josh, because it hasn’t happened. I’ve never had a man go down on me.”
Waves of shock cascaded across the room at your response. How could you go your entire adult life without getting your pussy eaten? It’s actually fairly easy, just sleep with shitty dudes that don’t wanna reciprocate and there you have it. You’ve experimented a little bit within your sex life, but something as elementary as getting head was something you had yet to check off your bucket list? You can’t really blame everyone for being so surprised about it, shit you probably would be too if you were in their shoes. It seemed like with every second the group sat with this new revelation more and more questions were getting asked, almost an overwhelming amount.
“Okay okay chill, damn. Didn’t realize I was playing ‘truth or dare’ all of a sudden,” you joked before shifting to a more serious tone, “But yes, I’ve sucked dick before. Yes, I’ve been fingered. No, I’m not bullshitting. And yes, my taste in men is ass. Haven’t found a single one that wants to go down on me, yet they expect me to go down on them. Crazy I know, but it is what it is. Men ain’t shit apparently. Now there, did I cover everything?”
“So…,” Jon piped up, “What the fuck y’all be doin’ then? Just straight to pound town and that’s it? No warm up?”
“Pound town is crazyyyy,” you laughed, “But not exactly. Actually, I can break down every time I’ve ever had sex with somebody. It all follows the same steps: kiss on each other for a bit, take all our clothes off, I’ll suck his dick, we fuck, he cums, and then it’s over with.”
“Wait, girl, are you saying you’ve never cum during sex? If that’s what you’re saying honey, I’m sorry, but we gotta find you a fuckin’ man. No more of these boys that you’re messin’ with.” Galina asked.
“Oh, no, I have before. Just a handful of times though, most of the time I’ve gotta finish myself off after. Can’t really expect me to finish if you don’t warm me up a bit, you know?” You responded.
“Man, what the fuck is wrong with this generation? Giving your girl head should be a requirement, these boys you’re fuckin’ with are weird as fuck, Y/N, my girl’s right. We gotta find you a real man,” Joe stated.
“Oh, trust me, I agree with y’all. It’s why I just stopped having sex altogether; Imma have to finish myself off anyways, might as well not waste my time.”
“Y/N, babes, how fuckin’ long has it been since you’ve gotten dick?” Trin asked, anxiously waiting for your answer.
“Um…” Wow, you really had to think about it. “If I remember right, then around Christmas time…” “Oh, so less than a year then. For a second there I thought-”
“Of 2022,” you interrupted. Man, if earlier was chaotic, this new confession was fucking bedlam. Everyone seemed to be losing their minds, except Josh, who had stayed silent and kept his eyes locked on you throughout this entire exchange.
“Alright, alright, yes I get it. It’s insane, I know. It is what it is, I guess. But as much as I’d love to continue sharing about my travesty of a sex life, I desperately need another drink. Anyone need anything from the kitchen?” Everyone started listing their drink of choice, and you were having a hard time keeping up with it all, until Josh spoke for the first time since your revelation.
“I’ll just come with you, seems like everybody needs something right now. You’re gonna need help carrying everyone’s shit.” You smiled at him, silently thanking him, but he didn’t say a word- he just followed closely behind you to the kitchen. You immediately went into bartender mode, making everyone’s drinks to bring back to the living room, but Josh stood still watching you from the entryway of the kitchen- still not talking.
“Hey, Josh, you mind helping me make a couple drinks real quick? I need some help over here,” you chuckled, but stopped when you noticed he wasn’t responding and turned to look at him.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Huh?”
“Why didn’t you tell me about you not getting your needs met? You know I would’ve helped you out, ma,” Josh asked, closing the distance between you two.
You furrowed your brows in confusion, turning back to finish making everyone’s drinks. “Helped me? What does that even mean? Look, I really don’t wanna talk about this right now, so can we put this convo on the back burner until the night is over with? Good, now help me carry these drinks back to the living room, would you?” You sighed, grabbing a few cups before brushing past him to head back to the group- leaving Josh alone in the kitchen with his thoughts.
After a couple more games and a few more drinks, it was time for everyone to head out for the night. You rode to Joe’s house with Josh, who you hadn’t talked to since the conversation earlier in the kitchen. You were crashing there for the night, 1. Because you knew you’d have a drink too many and wouldn’t be able to drive, and 2. Because staying over at each others’ houses was a common occurrence nowadays. You both said your goodbyes to the group and headed back to his place. The car ride was silent, neither of you talking to the other and only the low hum of whatever songs were on Josh’s playlist. You stared out of the window the whole car ride, watching the blur of the city lights pass by and replaying you two’s conversation in your head over and over. What did he mean by, “I would’ve helped you out?” How would he have helped you?
You’re snapped out of your thoughts by the car pulling into Josh’s driveway and being put in park. Josh got out quickly, while you sat for a second to let out a deep breath you didn’t know you were holding. Well, here goes nothing.
You got inside and went to take your jacket and shoes off, barely getting yourself situated before Josh spoke.
“So, are you ready to talk about it now or are you just not gonna address it?” Sigh, here we go.
“What is there to address, huh? All I did was tell the truth, I haven’t had a guy go down on me before. I don’t really understand what the big deal is.”
“The big deal is that you should’ve told me about this a long time ago,” Josh replied, “If you had told me I could’ve done something about it.”
“Done something about it? How, Josh? What could you have possibly done about it? It doesn’t even matter and honestly, I don’t understand why you’re so worked up over it.”
“Oh, c’mon Y/N, don’t act stupid. You know damn well if I had known about it I would’ve offered to be your ‘first’.” Sorry, what? You blinked hard, trying to make sure you heard him correctly. “Shit, as far as I’m concerned, offer’s still on the table,” his voice lowered, making slow strides towards you and backing you into the door, “What kind of ‘best friend’ would I be if I didn’t make sure you were taken care of, hmm?”
You shivered at his words, feeling the lust that was oozing from his words engulf the space between the two of you. You’d be lying to yourself if you said you hadn’t imagined Josh like this before. Hell, he’s who you think about when you’re touching yourself at night. Sure, he was attractive, but lately you’d developed feelings for the man. You craved him in more ways than one, but never in a million years did you think you’d actually end up in this position- trapped between him and the door while he dragged his fingers along your sides, trailing further and further down…
“So, what’s it gonna be,” he paused, his hand finally reaching your core and rubbing you through your leggings you were wearing. He groaned, feeling your wetness that had soaked through now pooling on his fingers. “You gonna let me take care of you baby?” He leans in to whisper in your ear, “Imma eat this pussy in every room of the house mamas, make you cum in every one of ‘em too. All you gotta do is say the word.”
Your skin felt like it was on fire. The sultriness in his voice had you ready to completely give yourself to him. You had completely soaked through your leggings at this point, and were convinced if they weren’t so restricting you’d be dripping wet for him. You had a choice to make: let him take you right here and raise some question marks surrounding your friendship, or decline his offer and leave yourself hot and bothered? Lucky for you, your voice made the decision before your mind did.
“Please, Josh, please.”
That was all it took for him to smash his lips into yours; desperately but passionate, lovingly yet intense. Your tongues battled for dominance while the two of you hastily removed any article of clothing separating you, craving to feel the warmth of each others’ skin with nothing in the way. Both of you were now left in just your undergarments, relentlessly kissing each other like your lives depended on it. His lips made their way to your neck, leaving trails of hickies in their wake. You moaned his name and fisted his hair with each one he created, trembling with every graze of his teeth or lick of his tongue.
“You… have no idea… how long… I’ve wanted this,” he muttered in between each bruise he made. Your head was thrown back against the wooden door, relishing every moment.
“Me too,” you breathed out, and it was the truth. You had only recently come to terms with seeing him as more than your best friend, but deep down you knew your feelings had begun months prior. He was all you ever thought about, and here you were, melting underneath him as he ensured not a single inch of your body went untouched by his lips.
His hands traveled to the back of your thighs and by pure instinct you jumped into his arms, holding you tightly as he carried you to your first stop: the kitchen. Josh laid you down on the island countertop, goosebumps erupting all over as the cold surface touched your skin. You arched your back for him to remove your bra, and once removed, he placed a trail of kisses starting from your breasts and moving down to your sternum, then your stomach, and finally your hips, where the band of your thong rested. Looking up at you, his teeth grazed the soft skin before latching onto the waistband of your thong, before sliding it down your legs. His hands slowly traveled up your calves and to your thighs, spreading them apart to give him a look at what he’s been craving since earlier this evening.
“Such a pretty pussy,” he hummed, “And all mine too. Look at how wet you are for me already, baby. Can’t believe you’ve been hiding her from me all this time, ma.” And with that he lowers his head and licks between your aching folds, your eyes widening and rolling to the back of your head the moment his mouth makes contact. He hungrily attacks your folds as your fingers weave themselves into his hair, pushing his face deeper into your pussy. The moans coming from your mouth are uncontrollable, repeating his name over and over as you fall further into oblivion.
“Tastes so sweet, baby girl, could eat you for every meal.” His words vibrate through your core and your pussy flutters. You inadvertently buck your hips but his arm stops you, holding you down so you can take everything he’s giving you right now. His mouth wraps around your clit, paying special attention to the sensitive bud and you arch your back at the touch- feeling a familiar pressure building up in the pit of your stomach and quickly reaching its peak. “F-fuckk, Josh, feels so good. I’m gonna-”
“Let it out, princess. Show Daddy how good he makes you feel.”
Your orgasm rips through you, sending your body into a state you had never experienced before. You were writhing underneath him, holding onto his hair for dear life as your eyes roll into your skull and your back arches off the countertop. Strings of profanities and pants of his name cross your lips, lost in the flood of pleasure stemming from the hardest orgasm you’ve ever had. You finally begin to take control of your breathing again, attempting to slow it as your body gives out and lies limp on the marble, completely wiped out. Josh lifts his head to reveal himself, mouth and beard dripping in your wetness. He smiles softly at you, proud that he was the first to eat your pussy and proud that he was able to make you completely fall apart for him. He leans up to you and gives a soft kiss to your lips, before lifting your body from the countertop and carrying you once again. “Oh, baby, I’m not done with you yet. I said I was gonna eat you in every room of this house tonight, and you know I don’t break my promises.”
“Ohh f-fuckk! J-Josh, I- I can’t, I’m-”
“Yes you can, mamas, gimme another one. You can do it, princess.” You were now on your 5th orgasm of the night. Josh had kept his promise alright, making you cum in the kitchen, living room, his office, master bathroom, and now his bedroom. You’d think after that many times a man would be exhausted, but with every time he had made you cum he had gained more energy. It’s like making you cum was his food source, and it was driving him to keep going. Once again you came hard from his mouth and tongue, vision turning white and seeing stars as you hit your orgasm. You were for sure tired, but one thought kept you going: you wanted his cock. Bad.
“B-baby,” you panted, still coming down from your last orgasm, “Please… I want you. Fuck me, please.”
“You just came on my face 5 times, and now you want my dick? Fuck baby, you sure you can take it?” “Fuckk yes, Josh, just please… I need it, baby. I can handle one more.”
Josh takes off his boxers and climbs on top of you, passionately kissing your lips as he pumps his cock and rubs his tip up and down your sensitive pussy, making you whimper into the kiss. “You’ve been so good for me tonight, baby girl. Imma take good care of you, I promise. You ready for me, baby?”
You nod, staring into his eyes as he slowly enters you. You cry out as his cock fully fills your pussy, already close to cumming again.
“Fuck, Y/N, so fuckin’ tight. Taking me so well,” he hisses, slowly thrusting inside of you. He wraps your legs around his waist and peppers kisses on your forehead, cheeks, nose, and lips, whispering praises to you as he slowly pumps in and out of you. Your pussy tightens around him, signaling you’re close, making him moan loudly in response. “Shitt, do that again, mamas. Squeeze my shit just like that, gonna make me fuck you full of my cum, baby.” You dig your nails into his shoulders and moan in response, “Is that what you want, baby girl? You want Daddy to fill you up ‘til you’re dripping my cum? Want me to cum deep, don’t you baby?”
“F-fuck… oh my god… please, Daddy. Want your cum in me so fuckin’ bad… s-shitt, Josh, I’m so-”
“Go ahead and soak this dick, pretty girl. I’m there too, baby. Cum for me.”Any energy you had saved was completely wiped out, coming undone again for him as he buried his face in your neck and pumped you full of his cum. Both of your moans echoed in his room, engulfing you two as you fell apart together. Josh collapses on the bed next to you, you both breathing heavily, and silent. Nothing needed to be said, as you nestled into his side and drifted to sleep with only one thought on your mind: Never have I ever… well now I have… and more.
#jey uso#jey uso smut#jey uso imagine#jey uso fic#jey uso fanfiction#jey uso x you#jey uso x reader#jey uso x y/n#main event jey uso#wwe#wwe fanfiction#wwe fic#wwe imagine#wwe smut
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wowww dude that was so strong and manly of you when you drove right up close behind that car when they were driving at the speed limit and it was sooooo masculine of you when you flashed your lights over and over and then hooked your manly horn and overtook on the inside oohhhh I bet this will save your failing marriage and compensate for your unsatisfactory sexual performances
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On one hand I very much get that it's subversive for trans guys to want to transition to be masculine, normal dudes and on the other hand I get annoyed when guys who want to be just average masculine passing normative dudes get all high and mighty and mock guys who want to be gnc. Like wowww you're really standing up against the feminine men who rule society
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