#would trying to date this woman realistically be a terrible idea? 100% absolutely

[devilemon]

fuck you *yumes ur old woman*

[sailormoonandme]

My thoughts regarding the Usagi/Mamoru age gap

I am writing this in response to this thread.

To be clear as crystal here, this is just my take on the situation.

With all that said, for the sake of argument let's say we are in total agreement that in real life a 14 year old middle schooler and a 17 year old college student shouldn't be dating.*

But that is the key phrase here: 'Real life'.

The thing is...there is no end of fairy tales or media aimed at children that at best start to fall apart or at worst become extremely creepy when you apply a realistic lens to it.

That is the joke about the majority of Disney's canon in fact. For instance, Aladdin was 18 whilst Jasmine was 16. I'm British and over here 16 is the legal age of consent for sex but even so I'm at least iffy on a 16 year old dating an 18 year old. And to trade off some of the comments elsewhere in the above linked thread, you could absolutely argue there was a 'mental gap' between Al and Jas given how she was a sheltered and somewhat naive princess who'd never left the palace and he was a streetwise older guy who'd obviously flirted and charmed his way out of trouble before.

But let's consider a different Disney classic, perhaps their most famous movie, the Lion King.

The Lion King is a beloved and rightly iconic movie but if you take it at face value and realistically (albeit ignoring the fact that animals can talk, sing and are capable of human emotions and cultural references) it's guilty of:

Promoting incest because Simba and Nala would have at best been first cousins (Nala being Scar's daughter) at worst brother and sister. Because that is how lions work. Male lions murder the cubs of other males with the possible exceptions of their brother's cubs where they co-rule a pride. Even with the best case scenario, deleted scenes had Scar try to make Nala his queen and those scenes were reinserted for the hit Broadway musical. So either a brother and sister hook up or two first cousins hook up and a Dad tried to have sex with his daughter.

Promoting racial/class segregation: The Hyenas are from the 'dark shadowy' place and are given traits you can easily interpret as associated with black, Hispanic, Latinex or mentally disabled people. They are also framed with Nazi imagery and it is Scar's decision to let them roam freely that causes famine. Simba beats them, they are forced back to 'where they came from' and all is well.

Promoting authoritarian absolute monarchies. That's the whole movie's plot. Simba must embrace his destiny as the 'rightful ruler' of the pridelands whereby all other animals bow down to him. It's not even like the lions are the ruling class and they are at least democratic amongst themselves, it's literally this ONE specific bloodline that is not only in charge but is SUPPOSED to be in charge. Even if the wrong person from that bloodline is in charge the entire land suffers until the 'right' person takes the throne. That's a pretty terrible and pretty anti-democratic message isn't it, and that's coming from someone who lives in a country WITH a monarchy.

And, I admit this one is a serious stretch, but you could even argue that it's saying two men raising a child is a detriment to said child. Because Timon and Pumba raise Simba into an adult and the movie is very clear that he's grown up wrong, he is not the person he should be because he's embraced Timon and Pumba's upbringing.

So you see...the Lion King is mega terrible.

Except it isn't.

Because we all have the cognitive ability and understanding to grasp that you are not SUPPOSED to take it that realistically nor at face value. Even as children we grasped that, hence the generation that grew up with the Lion King (by and large) obviously don't think incest is okay, don't oppose same sex couples raising children, don't think segregation is a good idea and clearly do not think monarchies are the bee's knees.

Maybe as kids people couldn't put it into words, but material like this essentially exists in this realm of symbolism, psychological shorthand if you will.

In fact all fairy tales do that.

And Sailor Moon IS a fairy tale, or at the very least it borrows a whole lot from fairy tales.

In addition to being a fairy tale though Sailor Moon is a wish fulfillment fantasy story intended for a female audience (or at least a predominantly female audience).

Now of course what one woman's wish fulfillment fantasy might be may not be another's and I wouldn't be so presumptuous as to argue that Sailor Moon even clicks with the wish fulfillment fantasies of MOST female audience members. But I think it's fair to say from the cultural impact it has had, and how it's fanbase is clearly mostly made up of women, that the wish fulfillment fantasy it offers clicks with a sizeable enough number of women.

The reverse is true of something intended as a male wish fulfillment fantasy. James Bond was obviously intended as a male wish fulfillment fantasy, and it's success speaks to how it clearly clicked with a sizable enough number of people. And I don't think I'm being overly presumptuous here when i say MOST of those people were male.**

Both SM and 007 are wish fulfillment power fantasies but they are also romantic/sexual fantasies too.***

I don't think it's unreasonable to argue that for a sizable number (but not necessarily the majority) of women, including the tween/teen girls SM was aimed at, having an OLDER lover is a romantic wish fulfillment fantasy. On the flipside I don't think it's unreasonable to argue that for a sizable number of men and boys having an endless string of casual and completely consequence free sexual encounters with (traditionally speaking) gorgeous women who find you incredibly attractive is a sexual wish fulfillment fantasy.

And the thing is BOTH those things can become bad when you apply a realistic lens to either of them.

James Bond's sex life realistically would involve at least a few sexually transmitted diseases, unintended pregnancies (one of which occurs in the novels) and at least a few callously broken hearts. Even when you look at it strictly from Bond's POV that life only seems glamorous at first glance. Perhaps it is a fun fantasy, but only when it remains in the realm of fantasy. Because in real life that kind of life if lived long term is ultimately incredibly empty and unfulfilling. Even James Bond media has acknowledged this because there have been occasions in the novels and films where he has at least attempted to settle down with a stable partner. Many Bond fans (understandably) decry this as undermining part of the appeal of the character hence Bond inevitably defaults back to being single because that is a baked in part of the wish fulfillment fantasy the character offers.

Let's consider some other ways the Sailor Moon anime offers a wish fulfillment fantasy, namely the future of Crystal Tokyo.

At first glance it seems wonderfully utopic right. It is a beautiful crystalline world where everyone lives in peace and harmony, hunger disease and even aging having been functionally eliminated.

Well, that isn’t the case if you apply a realistic lens to it.

It's an absolute monarchy wherein everyone is functionally immortal and children don't reach maturity even after 900 years. Chibi-Usa clearly chafes at this reality so how do you imagine other children (who aren't royalty) might feel? How might their parents feel having to raise their children and be responsible for them for centuries as opposed to around twentysomething years? What if you became immortal in your 80s, you might be a very healthy 80 year old but you aren't in the prime of your life and you are stuck that way for what is essentially forever. Not to mention what if you don't like or do not agree with Neo-Queen Serenity's policies? What if they are actively detrimental to you, your family, your livelihood, etc? You can't vote her out of power and you can't even hope for things to change because everyone is healthy, provided for and lives forever. The chances of someone else coming to power are at best very, very, very slim.

Then you have the fact that it’s surely a society that would’ve stagnated because everyone is provided for. That’s the whole point of a utopia. It is perfection. But what if you are someone who defined your live by striving for improvement? What if you were a doctor and now found yourself redundant. Sure, you might acknowledge that’s for the greater good but you are still yourself left completely without purpose in this world.

And that’s not even considering the inevitable monotony of existing for hundreds of years. Modern medicine and science has allowed human beings to extend their life spans FAR beyond how long we’d live if we were still just cave people. As biological organisms are concerned we never evolved to live for 80-90 years. Even if your body isn’t breaking down across the centuries the human mind would never realistically be able to cope with centuries worth of memories and life experiences. Mental illnesses and conditions would be rife. If nothing else living in that world would sooner or later become utterly BORING!

Hate to say it and obviously it doesn’t justify their methods, but the Black Moon Clan kind of have some valid points against the world of Crystal Tokyo. At least they do when you break things down REALISTICALLY.

And that’s my thesis here. Sailor Moon isn’t supposed to be dissected realistically, at least not to THAT degree. It is a wish fulfilment fairy tale fantasy and demands a certain amount of suspension of disbelief and understanding of what the fantasy is offering.

And for the record I can 100% assure that no teenager in real life has, or could, ever get into a harmful relationship with someone older than them BECAUSE they watched Usagi and Mamoru’s relationship in the anime.

The human mind is a very complex and very powerful thing. At a younger age it’s impressionable and can therefore be influenced. But it’s not so susceptible that the romantic relationships in a cartoon about schoolgirl super heroes is going to influence a viewer into making any major life decisions that OTHER factors weren’t also influencing them to do.

In other words if a real life 14 year old girl began dating a 17 year old college guy it would’ve happened regardless of whether they watched Sailor Moon as a child or not.

Indeed, one of my frustrations with the podcast Sailor Business is how many guests on the show cite how they liked Usagi and Mamoru as children but now think their relationship is bad and creepy. I disagree with them for the reasons I cited above, but the fact that those panellists nigh universally give that same narrative proves how nobody was ever going to be prompted to do anything potentially harmful to themselves in real life by the show.

*Personally speaking that is certainly my own off the cuff attitude.

**Not to dismiss the fans who aren't, same goes for the non-female SM fans.

***Although I think you could argue SM is more on the romance side of things and 007 on the sexual side of things.

[prettyterribleimagines]

The last post was so cute I wanna try, how about relationship headcanons for A.S.S high ranking members + Narue?

The Director

She doesn't have a lot of free time, so she can't spend as much time she wants with her S/O. Being the director of an entire secret society drains her off of time and energy every single day.

There are weeks where they won't even see each other at all, her work is way more important than any feelings she might have so she can't do anything about it.

When she gets to spend time with her S/O she makes sure to make it count. She goes out on dates and spares no expense on making it an unforgettable experience.

She doesn't see a problem on letting her S/O know about the advanced science society and their goals, but she would avoid letting them know too much about it lest they be targetted by their enemies to find a weak point they can exploit

She is actually a great cook, and always makes some quick desserts to have with her S/O.

She's really affectionate, she adores PDA and insists on getting a "daily fix" of cuddling before she heads out to start her day

V.D

Dear lord, she has never been on a relationship and she has no idea what to do. She is 100% a tsundere and she can barely pretend she doesn't find her S/O funny or interesting

She will try every cliche in the book to try and fluster her S/O for once but in the end, this genius manages to fluster herself

She doesn't like going out on dates, preferring to stay inside and studying alongside them in silence

She gets all her relationship tips from Erika since when she sits down and thinks hard on the best way to woo her lover, she ends up in the "just shrink them!" Solution

She loves receiving gifts, especially clothes. She adores wearing them and showing them off to her S/O

She starts working harder after getting into a relationship. If she can finish everything she has to do for the day in half the time, she can spend the rest of the time with her S/O. Obviously, she won't tell them that, but it doesn't take a genius to realize that

Lady Masque

Another girl that has no idea what to do in a relationship. She only knows how to express herself using a sword, and that's not something that's not going to change overnight

She seems distant at all times, but the truth is that she is way too embarrassed to start any form of affectionate interaction with her S/O

She does her best to keep her S/O as far away as possible from the organizations business. But she isn't opposed to letting the more sane members interact with them either

She is only able to compliment her S/O if she is sparring with them. And that means that out of nowhere she is gonna say things like "your hair looks nice today!" Or "you look amazing today" as if she is complimenting their posture of abilities with the sword

She likes going out on dates, but only if she has the contact lens to hide the different colours of her eyes. That being said, she does like receiving compliments about her eyes from her S/O

She practices kissing her S/O using her mask, she just pretends it's them and gives pecks to the solid metal surface (she has cut her lips on it before, but that's a risk that she is willing to take)

Mizuho

Mizuho is already quite more accustomed to being in a relationship, even though she has a few honestly adorable quirks. She feels a lot more comfortable after she starts dating her S/O, they just make her feel secure and happy when they are around

She for some reason doesn't want to sneeze in front of her S/O, no one has any idea why but she will hold it into the point of her tearing up before excusing herself to the bathroom

She will do her absolute hardest to keep her S/O as far as possible from the organization she is part of, she will even exit it if it means nothing they do can affect her S/O in any way

She doesn't like going out to eat (she loves going on dates around town, but eating at a restaurant is something she refuses to do) and instead, she prefers cooking for her S/O. Her speciality is long-cooked dishes that she can put in the oven and forget about it for hours, and that means she can pull complex dishes out of the oven out of nowhere even if she spent the whole afternoon walking around with her S/O

She doesn't like getting any gifts, and the reason is that she is terrible about choosing gifts herself, so she will have to spend a lot of time a gift to give back to them

She loves cuddling, no matter the way they do it. She can be big or the little spoon, it doesn't matter as long as she can get close and personal with her S/O for a good while

Kanon

How was this little ball of pure rage and sadism able to meet someone that she liked and that someone was also capable of loving this catastrophe in the form of a woman? No idea, but here are the hcs

Kanon wants to look cool in front of her S/O at all times. No one knows why she has this need, but it can get her on incredibly tough situations (especially when she brags about her position and plans to a non-member of the society)

She is incredibly clingy, and won't let go of her S/O arm as long as they are going to the same place. She even grabs them while sleeping, practically choking them while dreaming about hugging them

She sings while tsking a bath or brushing her teeth. Most of the songs she hums are romantic ballad instrumental or death metal chorus, there is no in-between. She will even switch from one to the other in a second

She wants to keep her S/O posted on whatever activities she is doing at the society. She won't hide any details from them, revealing every last detail, because she trusts her S/O that much

Surprisingly she doesn't feel the need to hurt her S/O, being with them makes her feel at peace

Reina

Reina has an incredibly high standard for those she considers dating. If she is dating someone, you know that they had to go through hell and back to get her to settle with them

She is very high maintenance, she wants multiple dates every week and at least one gift every three days. She knows her worth, and she will make sure they know it too

She is very territorial about her S/O and only lets her guard down with the other queens since she knows there is no one alive who has the guts to mess with whats hers if they know her power

Outright refuse to eat anywhere that isn't a very expensive place if the main entrance doesn't have three digits on its price, she won't eat it. But on the other hand, she will eat anything her S/O cooks for her. For some reason, she accepts the imperfections and cheapness of those dishes

She has a lot more money than her S/O, but she still insists on them giving her gifts and not the other way around. She wants to live a fairy tale, and she will do her hardest to get that life

She hides her connection to the secret society to keep the image that her S/O has on their head about her being a "pure, gentle and humble princess" intact

Narue

She is very shy, so she definitely wasn't the first one to confess. She is the one that plans the dates out since she knows the best places for romantic encounters

She wants to live a fairy tale relationship like Reina, but she is way more realistic about it. She knows to not demand too much out of her S/O and makes sure to repay the love they give her

She cooks bentos to her S/O every morning so they can remember her even when they are apart. She arranges the food in the shape of stars, even if it looks completely random since she is terrible at organazing it like that

She prefers being the little spoon when cuddling, being held by someone just makes her feel secure and loved (it also makes her fall asleep incredibly fast, so she has to be the big spoon when watching movies together)

Loves playing games together, she absolutely sucks at all of them, but she still likes seeing her S/O focus on something mentally draining

[filmista]

Not So Guilty Pleasure: Why I Love Legally Blonde 💋

I've always been quite feminine or as people call that when you're younger, girly. I own two books solely on fashion photography, and two on fashion and beauty history.

And I'm pretty sure an adult man could actually drown in the number of handbags (some of which are truly obscenely overpriced) I've got in my closet. I've always loved the entire process of dressing up: picking clothes and all, applying some makeup even the dousing of the rose scented perfume I've loved and used for years was and is a wonderful part of that.

And I've always had as much as a love of pink (I simply thought pink stuff was pretty) as I did one of my other favorite colors which is actually navy blue, ironically enough. However, the pink made me more ashamed, than the blue did, and I did not really dare to admit that or to very openly liking "traditionally girly things"

It's the film Legally Blonde that brought the revelation that there's nothing wrong with what loving these things mean or can mean about you, that’s why from the first minute that I saw it I loved it, Legally Blonde was the first feminist tinted film I saw, back when I didn't even know what the word meant at all, or what a feminist is...

While it is a film that I love, it was always more of a closeted love. Because of course, not many people take the film seriously, first of all with the name and all. The DVD cover is all hot pink, and it has a blonde with a beaming smile in a pink dress and a chihuahua in her arms, even I when I first got it as a gift (from one of my aunts, who I love dearly but who has terrible taste in movies) thought it was going to be a truly horrible, forgettable  film, that I'd only watch one time in my life. 

But ten minutes in I loved the film, and even though I knew it was a film that I know many people would also detract, a part of me also has always thought: "Your time will come one day, people will see your value one day".

And I wasn't wrong, the day you discover that many people, in fact, love one of your favourite films (that you were ashamed of loving) and that it's gathered quite the cult following and has in fact been hailed for its feminist qualities, is a joyous day and you can smile with relief, you're in fact not out of your mind, and don't see stuff in a film that's actually not there, it almost made me wanna get Champagne (actually cava), order pizza and call all my girl friends for a viewing of the film. 

Now what I've always loved about the film, from the very first few minutes that you're in, is that it has as its protagonist a woman who  is unapologetically a woman and embraces her femininity to the fullest, even if it is perhaps in a caricatural sense:

Her room is all pink, the brush with which she brushes her shiny, golden, luscious blonde hair has fake rhinestones on it. There are flower petals on the ever present Cosmopolitan magazines, a True Color blonde hair dye bottle, bright glittery pink heels in the corner (I'd buy em actually, not gonna lie) well you get the idea anything that could possibly be pink or remotely femininely tinted was.

But it was a revelation for me even when I was younger: A woman that actually loves being a woman and that also sees nothing wrong with it? She must be a unicorn or at least some mythical creature!! Right?! It was simply marvelous for me because I was always the girl that if I could choose between pants or a dress or a skirt I'd go for the latter, I simply felt better and more me that way. 

We have as I said a woman that loves being a woman and that will never ever apologize for it and that will never ever tone down her feminity for anyone. She is openly and publicly emotional and enthusiastic about things.

 The film sees her as a serious protagonist and we're not supposed to laugh at her or pity her, we're supposed to sympathise, to love her, to embrace her, which proves to be a challenge for many people, I've watched the film with plenty of people; everyone initially laughed, but who had the best laugh in the end? That's right Elle Woods.

It's a film that shows that knowing about things that are typically considered feminine and therefore quite useless or at least valued less, is also a form of valuable intelligence. We see this 4 four minutes into the film.

Elle goes shopping for a dress for her special date when she expects her boyfriend will propose, the saleswoman thinks she's an easy target as did I initially "a dumb blonde with daddy's plastic."

She tries to sell her a dress that is both last season and that is also made out of a fabric that tears easily, Elle asks the saleswoman a question and through that tricks her into admitting that the dress is in fact low quality.

It's tricking someone into thinking you are in fact clueless and dumb as they thought you were and that you buy anything that you're told and then BAM proving you had a clue the entire time, it is a smart,  move and this is the minute my respect for her started growing.

It is also, in the end, her extensive beauty knowledge that solves a murder case, unrealistic maybe, but still, a very lovely touch, all sort of things can be involved in a murder case, stilettos could be a realistic weapon, as could a nail file if you think about it...

But my respect started swindling again, later on, she goes on that date, but instead of having her boyfriend propose to her he breaks up with her, because she is not serious enough which is code for "not smart enough" because duh blonde and feminine mean stupid.

And if you're a brunette you are of course immediately fiercely intelligent, I type (as I adjust my hot librarian glasses, and I don't have fun ever either, like ever, you'll never catch a cocktail in my hand...) It is of course but another dumb cliche.

But he breaks up with her because of this, because as he puts it, if I'm gonna be a senator by the time I'm 30 " I need a Jackie, not a Marilyn". So when she said you're breaking up with me "because I'm too blonde"? She was in fact not wrong, he broke up with her because of the cliches attached to being blonde and also to being an openly feminine woman because in his view you can't be both intelligent and feminine.

After the disastrous breakup, she breaks down, goes into full lockdown, doesn't go out for a week and of course eats a full box of chocolates...

However, she eventually collects herself with the help of her friends and become dead set against everyone's criticism and disbelief of making her way into Harvard Law School to gain back her man, there's no question in her mind that she will get in, she simply states  "there are no backup plans, I'm going to Harvard law".

While that determination is admirable, I at first absolutely hated it, a woman going to study, not to better herself but to get a man, can you get anymore 18th century and sexist? It absolutely is determination but of the wrong kind.

Yet the film does something smart with it, it takes this as the basis for an evolution in its main character, instead of having him realize what he's been missing out on and admiring her intelligence and determination finally and them being disgustingly happy and all.

It has her realise that he is not worthy of her, instead, once she's gotten in at Harvard she stays true to herself, which means that she gathers many laughs at first, and while she does at first try to prove that she is worthy of being there, when she applies herself to the books it is at first, to impress her ex.

However she eventually realises, that even when she has been trying hard to impress him, and has been achieving visible results, he never will see her as more than a dumb blonde, and still seems to believe that she either cheated or either slept her way in, it's when she speaks the words "I'm never going to be good enough for you,? Am I?", that this realization finally kicks in. 

He doesn't realise how valuable she is, until it is too late, when she doesn't want him back because she has better now found a better man, however this moment is but a briefly brushed over footnote, Legally  Blonde is above all a love story of a woman that realises her own self-worth through falling in love with the law and yes also with herself.

From the moment she realizes he doesn't want her back, she briefly debates giving up but then decides that there's no reason to not value her own worth, she was already on her way to getting a law degree and was loving what she was doing, so why give that up?

She already had all of this potential in her, but she never believed in it herself, because she was never encouraged to cultivate it, which really teaches us that we should try new things for ourselves, open new horizons for ourselves, not for anyone, not to prove anyone wrong, but for the satisfaction that brings to our own image of ourselves.

A few honourable mentions in the film's storyline are, that also illustrate it's feminist undertones is that it has her become friends with the woman she initially fought over the same man with, it's realistically brought as well, it moves slowly and naturally, there's not a moment of sudden, random reconciliation, it starts with small acts of kindness.

They eventually both realize that man they both so coveted was not worth their energy and Vivian, the friend dumps him, and Elle decidedly rejects when he comes on to her, begging for a second chance. The one professor who initially seemed to fully believe in her turns out to be a perverted creep and him saying she should take a summer internship with him and that he admires her intelligence is but a way to get her into bed.

And here's a woman who has no problem dressing as a pink Playboy bunny, but she will never, ever sleep with a professor to advance in her future career and eliminate possible competition because she 100% believes in having integrity. And I love it!

Elle feels used and reduced to her looks after, she absent-mindedly and sadly says "he saw me as a piece of ass". But she weathers the storm thanks to the unwavering support of those around her who she can call her friends, all of them stick to her side of the story, minus one person who is later a big enough person to admit that she misinterpreted what she saw and apologizes for it.

If only it could always go like this in real life, the man who came on sexually to her unwantedly, finds himself cut off by those around him and publicly shamed for his misstep.

Elle did not give in to his offer; out of pride but also because she perceives it as something immoral, and she believes above all in being a kind and good person, and in not stepping on others, that's simply who she is.

And she's not ashamed of it even if she is seen as naive for it, she is always unapologetically herself and always unapologetically defends her own beliefs and values, even if it causes her temporary unhappiness and I have always found that truly admirable, it is sometimes much easier to undermine and diminish yourself, if it means fitting in, holding on to you who are that takes true conviction of character! 

Now while it has all of this wonderfulness, the film would have likely been nothing or not as good without Reese Witherspoon, she's a joy to watch!

She took on the role of the bubbly blonde with the exact right amount of positive energy, confidence, and sass. She's also visibly enjoying herself and did truly outshine most of the other cast members.

But despite it's acting, that is of exceptional quality for a chick flick it also has an excellent soundtrack that actually brilliantly coheres to the film's subject and the emotional tone of some scenes.

While so many chick flicks aren't really that aesthetically pleasing, Legally Blonde was crafted with an admirable attention to detail, that renders it pleasing to the eye.

It's simply a film that's well worth the watch, it's well crafted and solid in all of its aspects and its message of self-love is believable as well as heartwarming and is not forced down your throat in such a cheesy manner that it makes you want to vomit.

“If you're going to let one stupid prick ruin your life... you're not the girl I thought you were.”