#worth living w/ out having any principle but I can’t die either but fck
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why is this having to wake me up from my sleep? this got worse so much faster. I need to shower ASAP in the morning, finish cleaning my room and charging my devices, wait for the termite guy’s 2pm inspection and leave for Cedars by 3pm. I need help now and that’s I think the fastest possible route in getting there.
#I’ve already gone to my local hospital for immediate help and they stabilized me so I may have to but that will cause so many more problems#in the long run as all my surgeons and specialists are over there and my hospital even said they don’t have the expertise to effectively#treat me in the way I deserve - ie they don’t have enough doctors let alone specialists and they could fck up the surgery#there are so many variables at play rn and my head is SPINNING#so if anyone is like why would I go to cedars atm and those are just some of the reasons#Ucla really screwed things up and although I could still go back - I know I’ll be safer at cedars based on what just happened#just wanted to throw that out there!!!! I’m pro Palestine until the end but I may need a hospital in the meantime to preform the surgery#but fck - ethics may make me go back to Ucla but I bet they donate to Israel to bc I remember as a uc student I wanted divestment then!#but omg they changed their stance at UCLA in 2023?#omg they did it 2 years after I left and still keep up w/ the boycott#these tags are me finding that news out and making the connection that my hospitalization funds any pain to a Palestinian would make life#worth living w/ out having any principle but I can’t die either but fck
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