#work especially is occupying a lot of my brain

[tunaababee]

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[where-does-the-heart-lie]

I love Sabo as a character so much! However something about his introduction into the story has bothered me for a while. Oda is a master story teller but it truly feels a bit like Sabo whole existence was dropped into our laps out of nowhere. What's your opinion on his introduction? And if you could, what would you change?

Thank you so much for all your amazing art! Always sparks joy.

Hello hello! I also love Sabo a lot and as such theres a lot that I’ve had to come to terms with and work out with myself. I’ll let you in on my brain worms and what they’ve concluded with this subject though so hopefully some kind of weight is lifted off your shoulders, cuz right now, i think his introduction was done really well.

So first off, All Of Luffy’s family members’s whole existences were dropped into our laps out of nowhere, to be fair.

Luffy is not one to talk about his family or his past at all. So i dont blame him for not telling us directly about sabo when he barely told us about ace as he stood in front of us in Alabasta. But even if he doesnt talk about his family, for me, it’s very easy to see what Sabo’s influence on and especially what the loss of him taught Luffy before we even officially see him. We see it especially in water 7/enis lobby/sabaody arcs. During the course of the story up to that point, we don’t really see the world government, but even so, we see Luffy’s complete understanding of the cruelty and heartache it creates. We see his utter determination to not let a single other person he loves be taken away by the world government, too.

Also in Arlong Park! We see him understand what someone’s sacrifice on his behalf looks like. He knows how it ended last time. He’s not going to let it happen again and seeing it happen again in arlong park and water 7 and sabaody and Marineford absolutely kills him. Omg not even to mention Shanks losing his arm, too. This man is completely surrounded by people sacrificing themselves for him wtf. But like Shanks’ situation didnt give him that patented World Government Hatred, babeyyyyyy

And with how he was reintroduced officially in dressrosa, i think it was very artistically done. Like having all those themes and parallels to Luffy’s childhood, even going so far as him pointing them out, himself. That, and the Mera Mera No Mi coming back into the story, it gets you thinking back on Luffy’s backstory and what his brotherhood meant to him. So like Sabo’s already in the back of your mind from that and then youre also thinking “well who the hell is gonna get this fruit once Luffy wins it??” So when Sabo comes back i just feel like “of course. Of course it could be no one else but you.”

Also E S P E C I A L L Y with introducing Sabo, famous Amnesia Patient, back into the story during an arc that explores the absolute horrors of being forgotten and being the one forgetting???? Like truly the most opportune moment to get him back in there. I really love the Dressrosa arc, i think it’s all done very well.

I feel like if it was just Ace and Luffy, it would feel incomplete. Like Sabo’s part in their backstories just adds such a delicious spice to the age old dynamic of “older brother who dies for younger brother who he loves a lot.”

Like tell me Ace’s Death would hit the same if Ace didnt already know what it felt like to lose a brother.

His passing is already beyond tragic but like Sabo’s whole part in it just makes it so much more tragic in a way thats just 😚🤌 mwah~❤️ 𝕷𝖎𝖋𝖊 𝕽𝖚𝖎𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌.

Sabo’s presence also adds a very personal level to Luffy’s understanding of the world he lived in. Like the big picture. I really think that if sabo wasnt occupying that space, Luffy wouldnt try to even know about the WG or class warfare or bother with any of that shit. Sabo is Luffy’s draw to the world around him me thinks. Like of course he would have to face that stuff when he went pirating, but those lessons would not have been taught to him before he got out there without Sabo.

This is the same in present day, like why would Luffy care at all about the Rev Army if Sabo wasnt in it? He’d be very thankful that they took Robin in, but like he wouldnt be actively asking about how the Rev Army was doing if his big bro wasnt a big part of it.

Also on that note of Sabo being in the Rev Army, I think that before Ace’s death and Sabo regaining his memory, Sabo wouldve been sneaky and largely unseen. Like yeah he barges into marine fortresses to take them down, but usually there isnt any survivors to tell the tales of him doing so. So before the timeskip, Sabo is out of the public eye. Out of any eye, really. But in my mind, when he regains his memory, i think he would do his level best to get his name out there. Thats why we see all those people in the colosseum/dressrosa be like “:O!!!! ITS THE CHIEF OF STAFF OF THE REV ARMY NOOOO” its cuz all his inhibitions left him. So like his face would be in news papers but luffy doesnt read news papers to find that Sabo’s alive and doing shit.

I think that Sabo took so long to let luffy know he was alive because he was scared luffy would hate him. I think he was scared of the potential scorn from his little brother he feels he wouldve been justified in getting. I think that if luffy was not put in a position where he wouldnt be able to fight in the colosseum anymore due to Law Getting Shot And Taken Off circumstances, Sabo wouldve let Luff keep going all the way to the end. But in that moment, Sabo knew that the fruit was no longer in his little brother’s capable hands and had to take matters into his own. Like we see him thinking about this in the episode of Sabo. We see him slowly following luffy around, listening, waiting, understanding the complexities of his situation, and ultimately making the decision to swap places with him.

I could literally talk about this forever i love talking about this forever and ever theres so much to discuss.

I’ve heard criticisms that Sabo’s amnesia story feels like fanfiction, but like,,, I just cant stop thinking about the hilarity of it all. Like why do you care that all this is all convenient, when it’s kinda funny. Like image you’re explaining your tragic backstory to someone and like you have to be like “now i know this sounds really. Really. Convenient. And ironic. But it’s My Life and I’ve had to Live Through It so please dont laugh.” Like idk!! ITS KINDA FUNNY!!!!!!!!!

I dont think i would be able to change anything about Sabo’s presence in the story without someone being out of character if im being honest. Like Luffy doesnt bring up his past, Ace doesnt like bringing up things that cause him pain, and we dont meet anyone else who knew he even existed until we see Luff’s backstory.

There’s a panel in the logue town arc though, that kinda looks like Sabo standing in the crowd. I think that maybe in the reanimated show or even the life action, if we could get a closer visual on him, just to see that he exists there, i think that would be neat.

Thanks for the question and kind words! Hope you enjoyed the long rant, i could rant for 2000000 more paragraphs but I’ll cut it there for now.

[thefandomthings]

Okay HEAR ME OUT BUTTTT what about zuko betrayal part 2 with the prompt “you own my heart” 👀

Betrayal

Fluff Prompt #30: "You own my heart."

Pairing: Zuko x F/Gn!reader

Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Terrible writing, happy ending? ¡¡SPOILERS!!, Takes place in Book 3. Ep. 11. It doesn't follow the script in the episode.

Notes: I'm so sorry I haven't been writing, I work in agriculture and summer and fall are my busiest times of the year and I lost motivation in the process 😭. But, hopefully I'm back. Thank you for your patience.

Part 1 Part 2 Prompt Event

Who knew betrayal could hurt so much. Chest heavy, heart heavier. Why did he do it? Does he think everything will be okay once he got back? Maybe Azula manipulated him? No. He did it willingly.

It's been weeks since the incident, a few months actually. You dont know what to do with yourself. Everything has been so emotionally hard. The long term depression grasping you in a chokehold.

The gaang has been there for you. Aang suffering from his own mid childhood crisis, the weight of the world literally on his shoulders. Katara tires to help as much as she could, but she is also dealing with things of her own. Sokka....was just Sokka.

After the invasion, you retreated to the western air temple. It was definitely a sight for sore eyes. The architecture was incredible. The Air Nation really outdid themselves.

"Y/n? Why don't you come eat dinner with us?" Katara leaned against the door frame of the room you are currently residing in. You look over at her gave her a small smile, one that didn't quite reach your eyes.

Katara didn't exactly like Zuko, having felt being betrayed as well. She has a lot of not nice things to say about the young prince, but for the sake of your ears she kept them to herself.

She grabs your arm pulling you up from your bed. You reluctantly follow her, head resting on her shoulder.

Today was a rough day. It Started out with a dream of you and him dancing in the temple. Oh so in love. Hands intertwined with each others. Whispering small nothings, butterflies occupying your chest and tummy. You woke up as if it was a nightmare, your brain toying with you like a yoyo.

Katara holds you gently, her hand laying on your head as if you were a child. At this moment you felt as if you were. Needing someone to comfort your aching heart.

"What are you doing here?!"

"Please just hear me out..." You immediately recognize that voice. It was him.

Zuko.

"Why should we? Huh?!" Sokka crosses his arms defensively. Katara flicks the lid on the water pouch on her hip, bending the water out.

You heart is hammering against your chest. His eyes immediately are drawn towards you. Zuko feels himself choke up. The sight of you made his chest hurt. The dullness you held in your eyes was unbearable to look at.

"Y/n...."

"She doesn't want to talk to you." Katara says, she moved to stand in front of you. Her body is blocking his sight of you. Zuko wants to reach for you, to grovel at your feet, to beg for forgiveness. Even if it hurts his pride, or his reputation. Which wasn't much good anyway. He had to make it right with you.

You are his everything.

"It's okay Katara." You give her a reassuring smile, it wasn't very convincing to anyone who knew you.

"What're you doing here?" You inquire and step next to Katara. Your eyes boring into his, he looked...Sad. Regret swimming in his honey irises.

"I've changed-" You feel yourself moving on its own. You hold your hand up, and he stopped talking.

"That's what you said under Ba Sing Se, then you left. Betraying everyone who cared about you. Especially Uncle Iroh."

That struck a nerve, his face hardens and he looks away slightly, eyebrows furrowed. His tongue darts out and wets his dry and cracked lips, his golden eyes looking back up at you. He steps closer, his hands clenching and unclenching by his side.

Zuko wants to hold you...Needs to feel you against him. To kiss you, to be with you. He needs you like he needs air, without you he's nothing, just a shell of the man he was before he lost you.

"Y/n, please...I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." Zukos voice cracks slightly.

You purse your lips together tightly.

It's so very tempting to close the gap between the two of you, forgiving him just felt right. Maybe it was just the your heart talking over logic. Your headspace is messed up severely, the wound is still fresh in your brain and heart.

"Zuko-"

Katara stops you, stepping in front of you.

"Leave. You've done enough, you are not welcome here."

"Y/n...please." It was strange seeing him so weak for once, pleading you. Practically on his knees for forgiveness.

"You own my heart."

It hurt you to watch him get treated so badly. He deserved it, mostly. Everyone has the right to be angry with him. Chasing Aang across the globe, trying to kill you then after everything at Ba sing se. It was almost unforgivable. Almost.

•°•°•°•

Taglist: @etherjen @xlatinaaxx @youngladysakura @m4rlvky @kitt38 @monysakura @kenqki @rdpiano @mikemakesartt @thigh-o-saur @chi-ara @kookiegirl444 @snixx2088 @zacatecanaaaa

[wszczebrzyszynie]

Anymore space mining au stuff ?

Space mining occupies my brain so there is a lot of concepts but most of it is unfinished. Will probably post a lot of art related to it in the week. All i have to offer for now is an unfinished goal/relationship chart? Not sure how to call it but it exists. Doesnt include all characters and information... so all the additional things are below! Under the read more thing

Grian, Jimmy and Pearl are all from earth and were raised together. Pearl and Grian have a rival-like relationship but in a friendly, more sibling like way. Their main point of rivarly is their bounties... theyre both happy with their lifestyles now even if they were forced into crime by their less than ideal situation on their home planet. Grian used to be a small theif with a passion for explosives before he and Scar joined forces. In true post space colonial story fashion earth is a destroyed hellhole. Jimmy is the only one out of the three that managed to not go into crime; instead he led a pretty uneventful life. he became a space miner somewhere in the solar system. Married scott (who lives and works on a space station) somewhere down the line. All went well until he accidentialy discovered the presence of sculk, shutting the mine down. It would be okay if the same exact situation didnt happen again... and again. After divorce he went through a late 20s middle age crisis and started a ranch on a planet no one really heard about. Pearl and Grian both visit him from time to time

Scar used to be a bounty hunter. Not an independent one like etho is; instead scar was assigned the jobs he had to do by higher ups... More like a cop. It was a generally miserable experience for many reasons, so he left for crime quite easily. Him leaving also fixed his relationship with Cub a significant amount; the two are really close as theyre both next generation vex (which is an illegal genetic modification; next gen means they were not modified themselves, but they parents were. Their existence is therefore not illegal but undesirable and it was something scar had to deal with while being a bounty hunter a lot) and therefore treat each other like family a bit.

Joel and lizzie are married and space pirates. Both of them want to be treated more seriously, but Joel especially needs to be noticed by etho. Lizzie just accepted that.

Cleo and bdubs used to work together for a stupid amount of time; mostly doing all kinds of jobs no one wanted to do. Everything went well until bdubs got caught by etho and went to actual prison for a while. The prison itself wasnt what changed him; he became absolutely fascinsted with etho instead, leaving his old life behind and becoming a bounty hunter. Cleo obviously holds a grudge... so much so that despite focusing more on sculpting she still finds time to mess with Bdubs plans every now and then

And Etho is mostly focused on finally catching Pearl and hiding the fact that hes an animal modification (done against his will). Kitty ...

[filurig]

a guy ive had in mind for a whileee its a crime i havent actually made an oc of my faeries yet so this guy!! this guy is actually the faerie that provides folke with funky fantasy hrt. more on them (and a bit about faeries) under the cut...

krillimir, or as they're known to many non-faeries, (spider's web) glasswing, is a rather newly adult faerie, having emerged about 3 years ago from their pupae. a bit of a free spirit in comparison to other faeries, they hail from the Hemarikkit Till colony to the south of vätterunda, perhaps the largest colony in the area with its main structures occupying a sunlit forest grove. due to the size and relatively stable nature of the colony, there was not a lot of pressure/demand on newly emerged faeries to take up a specific role, and krillimir preferred to keep their options open and thus chose to identify as a generalist.

generalist faeries can kind of take on less specific work than other faerie genders usually do, and especially work which involves collaboration with other species, and curious about the world outside of the colony, krillimir applied to be a participant in the colony's medical program - basically all faerie colonies have a medical program which involves a collaboration with the area's local tomtar, who will provide them with illusory magic to maintain their settlements and keep them hidden/protected. in return, the faeries offer their faerie dust, which can be finely tuned to affect an organism's hormone levels (as well as some other biochemicals) - this of course can be used to treat certain conditions, or as a way to alleviate pain, etc.

gullmar, who is folke's "tomte uncle" in a way, ended up visiting the Hemarikkit Till colony in search of a faerie that could help with folke's Trans Gender Blues (aka: provide him with hrt, after gullmar realised that folke was trans) and the freshly emerged krillimir would be assigned to him. due to the nature of the assignment, krillimir would just be permanently assigned to gullmar and comes by the granholm residence once every few months to readjust folke's hormone levels to the proper ones when the T levels start to fall off. while gullmar can find the faerie a bit neurotic and too energetic, their relationship grows to become amicable - a part of gullmar probably feels a fatherly instinct towards them hehe.

some extra faerie stuff i thought about making this guy so ill include:

faeries do not have a directly "spoken" language like we do, and communicate mostly through pheromones, body gestures and sounds like squeaking, trilling and hissing. they can communicate with other species through their pheromones, but as they communicate with said species in the target's language, things like names are often just directly translated. "krillimir" means "spider's web glass wing". how do we have the "romanization" of their name then? Well through some convoluted shenanigans. basically - tomtar have an anda-powered ability to learn the language of other species. with enough exposure and socialisation they will just naturally begin to gain an understanding of that language, and their ability has led them to be able to learn faerie language, especially helped by it also existing in a written form. while faeries don't speak this written language, it is how they conceptualise more complex ideas internally (the internal voice so to speak) - with the tomte ability, they can somewhat approximate what the language would sound like if spoken - at least filtered through the tomte brain. its most definitely not 100% accurate to what it would sound like though but most faeries accept it as close enough. this probably makes no sense but erm it sorta makes sense to me. LOL. but it means that most species that haven't learn to read faerie will only hear the literal translation when a faerie introduces themself, and thus many call krillimir by glasswing for short.

krillimir is a "generalist", which is one of many faerie genders. i made a post about it a while back! they go by they/them but generally doesn't mind he/she either.

faerie clothing is generally made of a fabric woven together by silk produced by them themselves - this silk is mainly produced by broodtenders or generalists. they also have a special way of "tanning" leaves, ending up with them having leather-like properties, which is part of what krillimir's outfit is made out of there! very popular reccuring symbols in their fabric design are "eye" "mimicry" and sometimes patterns which mimic some other animal/creature.

[thetravelingtyper]

Miscellaneous Soft! Simon Headcannons!

The album Northern Attitude by Noah Kahan has wrecked my brain So please enjoy!

Masterlist!

Soft Simon likes being within grabbing distance. I feel he always has a hand on you but doesn't want to be overbearing. I think he still has his demons, how can he not, but through love and a lot of work he can manage and accept seeing the face behind the mask. Work yes he has it on 24/7 but Simon, your Simon, tries to keep the bitterness and freeze of Ghost away.

Soft Simon always has a hint of fear of you leaving. You wouldn't of course but there is always that want to run. The vulnerability of pulling down the necessary walls. It comes in nightmares. I think in turn if you suffer from an anxiety disorder (Like I do) he understands your fears, especially if you have trauma. And if you were gone somehow, he would dream of you with a wistful sigh as he tries to go on about his day.

Soft Simon has a dog who happens to love you. Be it you are a close friend or partner. He quietly cherishes you, honey eyes warming to yours as you bury your nose in his dog's fur. I am unsure about children but I could see a healed Simon as a good father.

Soft Simon who chats about you casually to Soap, Gaz, and Price. If you aren't together the boys do their best to push him to confess his feelings. They realized you, independent and gentle would be good for the man. Say you two part ways for honest reasons, he's too dedicated to work per se, his door would always be open.

As you dance the line between friends and something more there are signs. His dog runs to the door, your spare clothes in the guest bedroom, and spare boots are by your door. More intimate? The smell of him on your clothing as he lingers in the bathroom on leave. You're doing your skincare and he leans over you from behind, you huff his arms barring your work so you hand him something to keep him occupied.

Did you get sick? You better believe Simon is there, he lingers like a shadow. Physical? He'll bring you food or make it in your kitchen somehow having learned where everything was. Mental? Simon's been through hell, he understands those demons. He'll pop in over text asking if you took your meds. He keeps a packed kit for you at his place. If there is any anxiety he'll help you work through it.

He will watch if you start to spiral, especially if you are running from something. He is the lighthouse at the port in the storm. He encourages you with a guiding hand and will lead you back home into his arms. It is his hope you choose to stay. 

[mothwingwritings]

There’s Honey On The Moon Tonight

F!Reader X Kaoru Hanayama

Maaaaan it’s been so long and I am SO sorry. I kinda got out of my groove for a bit and life got overwhelming and draining, hence the radio silence. I wanted to come back with a little fic to get me back into the swing of things and since I have wanted to write for Hanayama for some time, this came about. It was based around a yandere prompt I saw that was “I love you so much, you have no idea what limits I would go to prove that to you.” I actually started writing this for Jack, had all kinds of issues, and decided to write it for Hanayama instead lol. I may still possibly post the little Jack fic I plucked at, but I am overall pretty meh about it so we’ll see. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I really want to work on writing some shorter stuff for a while. I am so in awe of all of you that can churn out these small masterpieces. My ass does NOT know when to shut up and when I start to write my brain is like no… You must explain EVERYTHING, which (whether my mind believes it or not) is not something that needs to be done. ( ͜。 ͡ʖ ͜。) So going through a lot of trying to unlearn that.

ANYWAY I will be quiet and leave this hear for your perusal. It is my gift for coming home (finally) and working to get back up to speed! Thank you all for reading anything I write, and thank you if you like it! I am constantly floored by how wonderful you all are, and I appreciate anyone that reads my stuff more than you all know. (╥﹏╥)

This fic is set a few years in the future, you and Hanayama are both adults and at this point he is even more of a Yakuza big shot. You play the starring role of his forced little mob princess wife, isn’t that sweet? I love romance! ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა

WARNINGS: Yandere, very dubcon (dare I say even noncon?), power imbalances, grooming, unwanted touching/kissing/heavy petting, forced marriage, mentions of violence and hints of cruelty, mentions of sex.

Some people may call this ‘the dream life’.

Sitting on this private beach, you soaked in the last of the sun’s rays before it dipped beyond your view. The world was bathed in a swirl of pinks and oranges as the sun sunk into the sea, the gentle lap of the waves coming so close the water nearly touched your toes. The sand beneath your feet was soft, still warmed by the quickly setting sun. Gulls cooed as they circled above you, the flap of their wings diminishing as they began to fly off for the night. You were envious of them as you watched them soar freely, pained by how easily they could fly away to their home.

If only you could be so lucky.

Drops of salt water dotted your arms, mingling with what was left of your sunscreen. Though you had long since applied it, the remnants of the lotion and sea water left a slightly uncomfortable film on your skin, flaking under your nails when you scratched at it. A gust of wind blew, sending a chill through you. Absentmindedly you wondered if despite your preparations, you had been burned.

“Do you plan to stay out here all night?”

Your breath caught in your throat, an all too familiar voice shattering the tranquility of the evening. You had been so caught up in your thoughts that you didn’t notice the lumbering form coming up behind you, his arrival marking the end of your solitude.

Another gust of wind blew causing you to shudder once more. As it whipped wildly around you, your body grew colder. It was an unwelcome feeling, especially when just moments ago you were surrounded by such blissful warmth.

If only you could have just a few more minutes to yourself…

It had been a peaceful day, the nicest one you had had on this little honeymoon of yours. Kaoru Hanayama, your newly appointed husband, had been occupied most of the day, leaving you to your own devices.  The peace that awarded was something you sorely needed, seeing as none of this was anything you had ever agreed to willingly.

But now that he had returned all the contentment you had felt moments prior had been drained away, the joy of this island paradise tainted by his unwanted presence.

The night Kaoru proposed he had told you that he could not imagine living a life without you by his side, that his love for you had grown so rampantly that he could no longer bear the thought of not having you officially. He had long since coerced you into being his lover, leaving marriage the logical next step. Brandishing a ring so extravagant it bordered on gaudy, Kaoru got down on one knee. The upper echelon of the Hanayama group surrounded you in a constricting, tight circle, each set of eyes on you fixated on the scene with great interest… Thinking back on it, you had no idea how you didn’t pass out from sheer anxiety.

At that point, you were doomed to become his blushing, beautiful bride.

To you, Kaoru was husband in name only. This marriage would be just another trial that had been forced upon you since meeting the man, his ceaseless infatuation continually ripping your life asunder.  Needless to say, when he was off doing some important ‘family’ related things that ate up the majority of the day you didn’t have many complaints about his absence.

When he had departed this morning you did your best to look forlorn as he kissed you goodbye, shoulders slightly slumped as he ducked through the door, off to do god knows what to god knows who. Even as his now wife, you were never made privy to his ‘business’ dealings. So much of his life was shrouded in mystery, and you were just fine keeping it unknown.

You preferred when Kaoru was bogged down by work. If he was otherwise preoccupied that meant you had no expectation to be latched to his side, forced to play the role of obedient, doting wife. You abhorred the part you played in his life almost as much as you detested the man himself. It took years of whittling you down, making you shed piece after piece of yourself until you were everything he envisioned you would be, his perfect partner. He had molded you into his ideal love, and even though you knew you were sinking to a depth you were unsure you could ever escape, there was nothing you could do to stop it. It was hard going against a man who had the whole Yakuza at his fingertips, and the threat someone of Hanayama’s caliber posed against your family and friends was too high to risk insubordination.

So you acquiesced to his heavy handed flirting, playing along with his awkward and curt stabs at romance. You dropped everything for Hanayama, not because you wanted to, but because he expected it. And if there was one thing you gleaned about the mob life these past few years, it was what the boss wanted, the boss got.

He needed you in every way he could have you. You never had the option of saying no.

A heavy sigh came from behind you, annoyance radiating from your husband when you didn’t acknowledge him. Despite the irritation, the words he spoke came surprisingly gentle. “It’s time to come inside, (name). Dinner has arrived, it will be ready for us shortly.”

You wrapped your towel tightly around your shoulders, and with a deep shuddering breath, rose to your feet.

~

Silence hung heavy over the dinner table.

The meal Hanayama had served was nothing short of gourmet. ‘Only the finest for the finest’ was something he once joked to you, but he held firm to that ideal with every aspect of your life. The Oyabun’s wife was spared no expense, why would your meals be any different?  A caterer must have come with him to set the table up when Kaoru first arrived home, as it was set in a way that was far too charming for just him to pull off. Flowers and delicate candles garnished the surface, giving the whole room a romantic feel. Condiments and spices stood within arm’s reach, concealed in aesthetically pleasing containers, ready to season the cuisine as you saw fit.

Sighing lightly, you raised your glass for another sip of champagne. Even with the pretty presentation, you lacked the appetite to enjoy the meal. Picking at it lazily, you swirled the food around to make it appear as though you had eaten more than you had, like a child desperate to meet their parent’s approval so they could leave the table.

“Aren’t you hungry,” Kaoru’s deep voice finally interjected, his own feasting halted to shoot you a questioning glance. “You’ve barely touched your dinner. I thought you liked this restaurant? I chose to cater from them to please you.”

“Sorry,” You gave him a forced smile, “The food is delicious, but I think I may have snacked too much today, so I don’t have much of an appetite right now.”

You always had to choose your words carefully with Kaoru, his doting had a tendency to become overbearing if he believed you to be suffering from any ills. The last thing you needed was him fretting over you missing a dinner.  “I’ll have to box it up soon, that way I’ll have something to look forward to tomorrow.”

He grunted in response and an uneasy quiet once more loomed over the table. Hanayama did not seem totally appeased by your excuse, and refrained from placing his focus back on his meal. Dark, steely eyes bore holes into you as you sat hunched over, fixing your focus on anything but him.

“(Name)...”

He waited a moment before continuing, a look of brief tension flashing across his features.

“I know you are upset with me for leaving you alone all day, but you must know that I am sorry… Will you forgive me?”

To most people, this would be a shocking sight. It was highly unusual for a man like Kaoru Hanayama to be asking forgiveness so modestly, in fact, you were more apt to be groveling at his feet begging mercy than ever hearing the man beg pardon.

But things were different with you, they always had been. Try as he might to harden the soft spot he had for you, he never could seem to bring himself to give you the same detached treatment he gave others. And while his love for you was something he quite proudly displayed, he also refused to let his affections make either of you a target.

Being the Oyabun’s cherished wife put you in danger, his devotion to you making your demise extremely appealing to his enemies. The knowledge that your death would be a huge blow to the indomitable Hanayama was not lost on any who opposed him, but the problem laid in ever getting close to you. He certainly made it hard for anyone trying, finding a moment when you weren’t glued to his side was rare, finding you completely alone even more so.

However catching you by your lonesome was not entirely impossible, and leaving you vulnerable and ripe for assaulting was not something Kaoru could live with.

To combat this threat, he chose to lock you away so that no one could hurt you, touch you, see you, or ever be near enough to harm you. You were his and his alone, and he would let no other soul take you from him.

Ever since you had become ‘official’, the only people besides Hanayama ever allowed to have any correspondence with you were his closest inner circle and occasionally your family. But even then, Kaoru made sure he was always close by to monitor, hovering near to insure nothing untoward or upsetting could happen to you.

In your mind, the isolation hardly seemed necessary. No one ever questioned Hanayama’s might-one look at the man was all you needed to ascertain that he was a terrifyingly powerful figure. When you were in his vicinity your safety became his only care, any risk to that transforming him into a downright beast, bloodthirsty and rage filled beyond compare. Any unfortunate idiot wandering your way who held even a smidge of bad intent was in for a world of excruciating pain, followed by a slow and agonizing death.

But alone, in your own shared space away from prying eyes and hidden dangers, traces of that monster were nowhere to be found. When it’s just the two of you, Kaoru lets himself be overcome with his fondness for you, serenity overtaking his brute side. This display of vulnerability, these small moments of sickening intimacy, he saves solely for you, blanketing them upon you in suffocating layers until you can scarcely breathe.

“It was wrong of me to do,” He reached across the table, his thick hand encompassing yours in a tight grip. “A matter required my utmost attention, but it was not fair to leave my wife at any point during our honeymoon. This time is reserved for you and me alone, and I went against that. I just want you to know that I only left because I had to, and that I hurried back the moment I was able. I hope you can forgive me.”

If you could have done so consequence free, you would have burst out laughing. Of all the wrongs Hanayama had committed against you, giving you breathing room was the most minor of offences.

“It’s alright Kaoru,” you shook your head, keeping your voice even “I understand, and I’m not upset at you. I spent most of my day out enjoying the ocean while you had to get work done, so really I’m the one who should feel sorry for you in this situation, right?”

He smiled at your jest, a sparkle in his eyes as they drank you in.

“You are always my top priority,” Releasing your hand, he went to cup your cheek, engulfing the entirety of it. His calloused thumb pressed in a bit too hard as he stroked you, scratching at the soft skin of your cheeks apple. His hold was deeply uncomfortable, but you dared not move. “Don’t forget that, (name). Never question how much I treasure you.”

A chill ran through you at the intensity of his words, the rough feel of his palm reminding you of each violation his hands had ever committed against you. You watched as his eyes darted to your lips, a different kind of hunger overtaking his expression as he began to lean towards you, eager for a kiss. In a slight panic, you readjusted yourself, creating a moment to break away.  

“W-well, I really need to get this boxed up,” you spoke, pushing off the table until you were standing. Hanayama’s hand lingered in the air for a brief moment, still savoring the memory of holding you. An aggravated look flashed through his eyes, but was gone as quick as it came. “I don’t want to keep it out too long or else it will go bad. I’ll go grab a box.”

If there was going to be a time to escape him for the evening, this was it. You sprang into action, darting around the table as you made your way to the kitchen. The faster you could box up this meal, the faster you could excuse yourself and leave the room while Hanayama took his time finishing. Though it only would buy you a few minutes of privacy in the long run, any time to yourself was worth the effort.

But just before you could completely round the table, a tight grip around your waist snatched you from your course. In an instant you were tugged to the side, plucked up and planted until you were straddling one of your husband’s girthy legs.

Before your brain could even fully register what had happened, he was on you. Desirous, sloppy kisses littered your face as a salacious grin spread across his lips, a low growl rumbling from his chest with each smack of his lips. Your head was spinning at the speed it all occurred, a protesting whine all you could muster as his lips feverishly claimed yours.

Sweat mingled with the scent of his cologne, the heady scent a sign that his actions were quickly and effectively getting him riled up. Overcome with the essence of him, you could do little to fight his intrusion of your personal space, your balled fists pressing against his chest doing all they could to try and create distance. His tongue worked violently, the muscle forcing itself inside you until you were nearly choking on it. Your whole body was thrumming with discontent over how quickly Hanayama came to control your every sensation, his sheer mass totally overpowering all that you were.

The feverish grip he had on your hips kept you rooted, grasping you as if you were his lifeline. Bruises were already starting to form around the press of his fingers, your flesh searing in his hot hold. His hands began to forcibly gyrate your body, rocking you against his leg so that the short skirt you donned had ridden up completely, the sheer fabric of your panties the only thing keeping you from the raw friction of his leg. Your breath hitched as he jostled you against him, small pulses of unwanted pleasure resulting from the action.

His lips parted from yours, moving to latch on your neck. A dull ache emanated from the area he sucked, the bruises he had marked you with days prior not yet completely healed. Without warning, he bit into the tender flesh, causing you to jolt. A dark chuckle rumbled from within him at your response, his tongue laving up the small trail of blood the fresh wound had inflicted.

“My pretty wife,” he murmured in your ear, brushing the straps of your top off your shoulders, “Being apart from you made this day seem never ending. I longed for the moment I could come back and have you all to myself.”

He grabbed one of your hands off his chest, trailing it down his body until coming to a rest on the growing bulge of his crotch. He released a shuddering breath as he thrust against your unwilling palm, his hand guiding yours to trail his length through his tightening pants. Dread gripped you as he began to harden under your touch, his already impressive size growing with each hesitant stroke. Feeling him throb beneath you made your stomach turn, a horrible precursor to the pain you were about to endure.

“Feel what you do to me?” He rasped in your ear, hot breath fanning your neck, “This is all for you.”

“Please Kaoru, I-” Your meek voice began to object, but was cut off by another domineering kiss.

“You don’t have to beg me,” his voice was growing more ragged, breathing becoming choppier the harder he grinded your body against his, “Let me spoil you tonight, it’s the least my beautiful wife deserves for being such a good, patient girl for me.”

Unable to stand the torment of your touches any longer, he stood, throwing you over his shoulder in a display you could almost call barbaric. Making his way towards the bedroom, he smacked your ass harshly, eliciting a pleased hum at the pained gasp the act had garnered.

“I was going to offer dessert after our meal, but you have presented something much sweeter to me,” he chuckled as he entered the bedroom, tossing you to the awaiting bed, “And what you offer is something I would much rather devour.”

Tears stung your eyes as you watched Kaoru begin to shed his clothing, his scarred body coming more into view with each piece of fabric he cast aside.

“Get undressed,” he ordered, lust dripping from his features. His tongue darted out to wet his lips, before shooting you a cocky grin, “I can wait no longer. I love you so much, and you have no idea the limit’s I’ll go through to prove that to you.”

He took a step forward, inching his way up the bed, “But tonight, I don’t intend to stop until you understand.”

[berry-potchy]

what’s so funny is that I never really liked yandere/obsessive character x reader because it was either out of character for them or just to dark/weird

But something about Miguel has made me just go absolutely feral over it. Obsessed Miguel in the way that he is always watching you on cams, stroking his poor neglected cock as he just listens to your voice :(

He tries not to push you away and hides his obsession but when he overhears a conversation with you and someone else about your little workplace crush he loses it.

I’ve never been to fond of the murdering obsessive character- but Miguel constantly watching your every move just does something to me carnally.

I GET YOU! I get you 100% I'm not a yandere girl either but when I tell you Miguel O'Hara changed my brain chemistry. Whatever he wants, I'm into it.

I love Miguel with a lot little obsession. He has cameras everywhere so it just makes sense that he'd have cameras on you. You can bet they are recording your every move. Oh it would start out as just a little curiosity, just regular monitoring. However, Miguel got curious about you. You caught his attention and it's just a downward spiral from there. You don't know you doing some unintentional things that turn him on. Maybe you keep putting the tips of your pens in your mouth or biting your thumb. Or messily eating your food and licking you fingers oh-so lewdly. Miguel is so soooo frustrated with how much of a tease you are. He can't stop watching you. Those lips are so plump and pretty. They'd look so good wrapped around his cock. He thinks you'd love that. He'll always keep your pretty mouth occupied to satisfy that little oral fixation of yours.

And your voice god. So perfect. He'd specifically ask you to report to him whenever you come back from a mission. Doesn't matter if you had other teammates who are willing to report instead. He wants you to do all the talking. He loves listening to your voice especially when you say his name. Even better if you have an accent oh-- Miguel is enthralled. When he's working late at night (which is always), he'd have to use your voice as a little background noise. He loves hearing you talk to yourself, or if you have a pet, and when you sing when you think no one is listening. When you start singing some very spicy suggestive songs, Miguel's thoughts go all over the places. Is that what you like? Is that what you want him to do? He'd be gripping his cock as you keep singing. He's hard again even after already cumming.

And if he finds out you have a crush on someone??? Oh he'll make Lyla scour through all the data to find out who the person is. You keep being vague about your crush when you talk about them. Miguel just wants to know. He'll make sure to separate you from them as much as possible. Of course we know the crush is him and he would have known if he just masturbated less to your voice and realized how much your tone shifts when talking to him. Only him.

Of course, he tries to hide all this umm... not-stalking stalking from you. Tries to act like he doesn't monitor you all day. He asks you how your day has been even though he knew you were in your bed all day until you decided to show up at the HQ. And of course, you were none the wiser and just talks to him as usual.

-💖

[rudeflower]

JESS ANGST SCHOOL ANGST COMPLEX TRAUMA ANGST

In Keg Max! Principal Merton tells Jess he has missed 31 days of school. Now that makes him a chronic truant for sure, it means he's missed more than 10% of the school year, the standard school year is 180 days. Let's say there's 10 days left in the school year.

That's a LOT of school to miss. Young people improbably here, do not miss that much school

But relative to what we're being told about Jess, it's a weirdly low number? Jess never goes to school!!!! He's working 10000 hours at Walmart instead of going to school no school never heard of him!

That means that Jess attended school 139 days. Most schools I've worked with define that as a certain number of hours attended, more than half the day. So even if he was skipping that's 139 days he went to more than half the day NOT GOOD AT ALL BUT

Even after he was eighteen (early in the school year) he still laced up his boots and showed up somewhere he hated at saw no point in going to WHY!!????

First of all this is actually a ridiculously overcommitted young person let's at least acknowledge that.

He works before school at Luke's, and he works in the evenings too, closing up at 11:30 in one episode. Not just filling coffee mugs anymore. By season 3 he's closing alone, keeping tabs on the delivery schedule and capable of (furiously) running the morning rush alone.

AND he's working 45 hours a week at Walmart doing physical work, AND (poorly) maintaining a romantic relationship, AND reading obsessively, AND YES GOING TO SCHOOL! Jess starts working at Walmart in November (if you treat the air date as the canon date with the show roughly does), combined with Luke's it's probably 60-65 hours a week and still went to school 139 days!

He's making ridiculous choices because he is a tiny little fool but also has a trauma soaked brain

Jess chooses to be maxed out every minute of his life because he cannot tolerate being unoccupied, like a lot of people with complex trauma (and ADHD and Autism and more all of which could apply to Jess but rn I am talking about complex trauma)

When someone is used to chaos in their environment they actually feel less safe when things are quiet and still. It leads to someone who needs to have their RAM at 100% every waking AND sleeping moment

So they work 65+ hours, go to school most days, and they

cannot relax without extreme stimulation AKA needing the music on to sleep

Walk while reading because walking and looking ahead isn't enough is not occupied enough need more occupied

and starts reading the second he's stops talking to someone or using his hands to do something else. Reading as default in any given second.

He reads compulsively, no matter how chaotic the environment.

Reading ALSO isn't enough must be annotating and analyzing too passive reading is NOT ENOUGH

So Jess would rather show up at school for 139 days where other people are moving around, where there are fights to get into and classes to move to and from, even after he's an adult and Luke wouldn't find out that he isn't showing up. He'll show up to a test just to be in the classroom, not to take it.

This is not mentioning what I'm too lazy to screencap, that he's always doing something. that especially when he's talking to Luke Jess is constantly and doing things with his hands constantly.

There's really only one time we see Jess sitting still doing almost nothing

But not really nothing because smoking really is something.

My dude needs to be as occupied as possible from the time he wakes up all the way up to and including when he falls asleep to stay occupied and all that he's got on hand is going to a school that says the pledge of allegiance in six different languages then he will go! It's 100%%% occupation or the horror of possibly relaxing and WHAT WOULD HAPPEN THEN

[nadianova]

How much time do you spend planning some of your visual novels? At least going by some of them being jam submissions, it feels like you go from pre-production to a finished build very quickly, and it's amazing how you can manage that while still having an awesome story and so many assets.

Also, what is like, the process of planning a story out for you, if there's any vague or concrete similarities that you've noticed?

i think the important context here is that if i get bored/have nothing to do i jhust immediately get really suicidal its like ridiculous how bad it gets(ITS FINE DONT WORRY ABOUT IT IVE HAD 5 YEARS OF THERAPY). so i hate being bored and want to occupy my time wit something fun whatever that is. if i have a project to focus on but especially if I'm working for a game jam i have a deadline and i just decide to myself okay i will release a game now.

because ive made a decent amount of games i roughly have an idea on my capabilities, i can estimate how long it takes for me to write a story so and so long and how long it takes for me to draw stuff i need and how long it takes for me to throw stuff in renpy. these are estimates like as in I'm not accurate with it but still enough that i generally know where to start cutting ideas since the most important part is just having something to submit. i also know to plan around my brain wanting to slam my head into a wall an my hands suddenly giving up on being able to draw.

i think thats the beauty of game jams it forces you to just go for it and release something. releasing a 'bad' game is better than no game at all. experience only comes over time and i think just going for it is the best approach there is. like its literally 2 weeks 1 month whatever of your life. if you have the time and motivation go for it. make it work or fuck it up it wont matter in the grand scheme of things

im not sure what is the motivation behind the question but i do want to point out that this is just my method (if you can even call it a method) and the only way to figure out what works for you is to just try until you find something that actually works for you

idk not everyone will find it doable/fun to plan around spending two weeks gamedev 10 hours a day just cause i wanted to fit in 100 cgs for a jam game but apparently i can do that when i cheat my stupid adhd brain into hyperfocus with adhd meds

READMORE BECAUSE I CANT STOP RAMBLING

as for planning tho i think ideas on their own are worthless and its always about execution in the end. a great idea or a meh idea are the same for me but i do still enjoy the planning process so i keep notes

like i see a great tumblr post or i see some art or visual novel has some scene that inspires me: i save that shit for myself

having a big collection of random floating ideas like that helps me easily pick from especially during a jam type duration. right now i have like 4-5 half-baked project skeletons, some are literally like 3 pictures and some like naomida are a hundred hours worth of me writing world building about how the toilets work in a city with no plumbing cause its -30celcius(i love bringing this up)=

i dont normally plan that much, i tend to just wing it. like for malmaid i seriously just had some rough ideas and just went along as i wrote

same thing for dddeviance i had a handful of scenes that i really wanted to make and knew what kind of start and end it was meant to have and just figured out how to fill the in between. a lot of plot points changed vastly like halfway through i realised my devil + angel combination was stupid and i should just go for fallen angel + angel.

i think there really is no simple answer tho (as evident from the long as hell post) i don't really have a 'process' because every single game has been worked on has come with different type of planning since I'm always trying new stuff to try and distract me from boredom. like I've been using obsidian for naomida while previously I've just used a empty discord serve as my notes app for malmaid and dddeviance

and tbh with naomida I'm running to a new problem where I'm definitely planning too much. like I'm spending too much time fidgeting with details in chapter 4 even when i haven't finished writing chapter 1 just cause its so easy to get in the loop of "oh ill just change this one line" and boom 20 mins spent playing with my notes that didn't really progress my game since by the time i reach this point the whole scene might have shifted to something else

.

but if i had to squeeze an answer itd be something like everything related to my art or writing or games is just like "oooooo that seems fun i should remember this for later" and then i just string 10-100 of those into a story

i tend to write my stories in a format of

character A does this and that

this happens here

puppy play ryona piss orgasm

new day and then this happens here

sad thing happens

more piss orgasm

the end

and just like start filling in more details and working on my story in a nonlinear fashion until i feel like i have a strong enough skeleton that i can start writing my scenes. i hop around a lot, often preferring to write the fun scenes first like ero stuff or the ones I'm the most interested in and then the rest is just filling the blanks and stringing the cool scenes together

[blind0demon]

Restless Night

Summary: Falling asleep wasn't usually a problem for you, until it happened to be at the same time when you decided to share a bed with your boyfriend, Miles Quaritch. Luckily, the solution for your sleeping issue lies just next to you. 

Pairing: Na'vi! Miles Quaritch x Gender Neutral! Reader

Genre: Smut

Word Count: 4K

Author's Note: This is a part two of my work "Center of Attention" Hope you will enjoy this one as well :)

The constant faint sound of the ticking clock became too frustrating for your ears as you signed tiringly and shifted in your mattress yet again. Staring at the time on your phone, you found out that you've been laying like this for over two hours now with no signs of falling asleep soon. Angry, you had no other choice but to scroll through your device in search of something that could occupy your mind enough to finally feel sleepy and drift off. You felt incredibly jealous for the man next to you, who slept like a baby with no care in the world. His chest was moving with the sync of his low breathing and his lips were slightly parted. He looked so peaceful, despite all the things he had to go through on a daily basis.

A grimace formed on your face as you looked at Miles for a while, before turning your attention back on the bright screen. You didn't really care about the negative effect it had on your eyesight as anything was better than staring at the ceiling and waiting for a miracle to happen that would let you doze off. It wasn't typical of you to feel this way so you assumed that the only explanation for your problem was the recom sharing the bed with you tonight. Perhaps you were just excited as it was the first time you did anything like this before or maybe your body was just used to resting alone, without an alien warmth radiating on it all night.You had to admit that it did feel intimidating to lay next to someone who was a giant compared to your form. It wasn't an issue for you before as you spend a lot of time with the guy from the moment when he decided to ask you out. Well, you were glad that at least Quaritch wasn't having any of your problems. All you had to do was to wait.

A few minutes have passed and you were still as awake as ever with your back facing the man and your thumb tapping on the phone as you read a monotonous article. At this point, you would do anything to experience tiredness and fall asleep even if it was to bore you to death. You heard Miles turn in his sleep and didn't think anything of it, too consumed by the irritation buzzing in your mind, before you felt his body brush against your back and his arms wrapping around your neck. Your hands almost let go of your device in surprise at the sudden action and you slowly looked up to see that he was still sleeping, not aware of what he just did. 

Blushing, you thought about wiggling away as it wasn't a comfortable position, almost being suffocated by that huge man when an idea crossed your mind. With a straight face, you pressed your ass against his groin and heard a faint gasp leaving his lips. Your head immediately jolted upwards to see if he woke up but to your relief, he didn't. He felt so nice seated between your buttocks and would definitely split you in two, you thought to yourself as you bit your nail, perverted things starting to flood your brain. The two of you haven't tried getting intimate yet so all you could do is imagine the endless possibilities of how he could blow your mind, especially when he was a recom now.

With the now given strength than he had, he could effortlessly carry you around and anything that he wanted. You would be like a ragdoll for him, completely powerless and at his mercy. Damn it, you really shouldn't grind yourself like this against him, the voice of reason suddenly hitting your head as you were busy with wicked thinking. You forced yourself off of him, feeling cold after his body warmth left your back. It was inappropriate, that was true, but maybe if you could get yourself off, you would finally fall asleep. It wasn't fair that the man was the only one who was able to peacefully sleep while you were struggling. He could as well help you out a bit.

Your eyes stared at Miles for a moment as if to make sure that he wasn't aware of anything before you started to thrust yourself against him, enjoying the feeling of his covered member rubbing against your ass. If only he was awake and able to fuck you open and have his way with your tiny body, that would be enough to knock you out for days. You sucked the air in your lungs at the thought and slipped a hand underneath your shirt to play with your chest, imagining that it wasn't your limb but Quaritch's. His hot, firm touch would send shivers down your spine as he'd play with your buds, lazily twisting the sensitive flesh to hear your reactions.

You bet that he would take his time with you, he loved teasing you all the time so it wouldn't be a surprise if he did that in the bedroom as well. At the same time, he would grind his stiff member against your opening in a promise to rearrange your guts nice and good. Knowing that his manhood was just a few centimeters away from your clothed entrance only made your mouth water further. A muffled moan left your lips as you forced yourself to keep quiet while you put more pressure on the tender skin, abusing it with your fingertips and heavily breathing. The man had no idea that you were squirming beneath his massive physique and touching yourself at the thought of him. Your sex was throbbing at this point, eager for the slightest touch of your fingertips as your things were pressed together to muffle the uncomfortable feeling.

You decided not to edge yourself further and give in to your desires, moving your other hand down your stomach and under the material of your pants. The feeling of your fingers starting to form a pace brought another groan out of your throat and this time, you couldn't care anymore if Quaritch heard you. You were too consumed by the building up pleasure, too anxious that if you'd stop for just a moment, it would disappear for good. The man's shaft slowly grew harder as your soft ass kept grinding against it while his fingers slightly twitched at the unknowing stimulation. It felt even better when his thick tip was now pressing against your sensitive opening, hungry to push into your tight insides.

You could only dream of it, too drunk by the ringing ecstasy in your system as your hand worked hard to satisfy you, coaxed in your fluids. More, just a little more, you kept telling yourself, your hips now rapidly thrusting against Quaritch's body to squeeze every bit of pleasure that you could get. You were a mess now, desperate to reach your finish, driven by the thought of how good you would feel in a moment. Your face was red and you were gasping for air while your back was arching uncontrollably by the waves of pleasure hitting you one after another. Right, just a second and you will meet the greatest bliss in ages, just a bit more before you can finally finish and-

"(Y/N)... What are you doing?" His voice rang in your ears that broke you out of your transe and you stopped everything you did. Oh shit, you're fucked. You turned your head towards the source of the sound and were met with his yellow eyes looking down at you as he rubbed them tiredly. "Uh, nothing" You tried to say as casually as you could, not coming up with a more believable response as you squirmed away from him. All you had to do was pray and hope that he won't catch up with what you just did but it wasn't too hard as you looked like you've just ran a marathon. You stared at Miles in horror, your heart stopping in your chest as he took at your form, heavily breathing and slightly shaking.

Not only were you caught touching yourself, you didn't even get to climax, great. "You know, I understand if you would play with yourself when you're alone and it's completely normal, but doing it right next to me? You are bolder than I thought" He chuckled in amusement, his voice still raspy as he just woke up. "It can get quite boring when you can't fall asleep" You answered frustrated, the throbbing feeling between your legs still letting itself know to you. The man pretended to look sad and leaned closer to you, making the bed squeak as he shifted his body weight above you. "Poor thing, and you thought that this could solve the issue? Should've woken be up to help you, sweetheart" He cooed, his finger tracing over the soft skin of your face, taking in your fucked out expression.

You looked absolutely wrecked right now. "Didn't want to ruin your beauty sleep" You teased, wrapping your arms around his neck. "Well, now you left the two of us with a problem" Quaritch commented and pressed his groin against your thigh, letting you feel the hard erection covered under his pants. You didn't think that he could get this excited just by your slight movements against him, especially in his sleep, it turns out that you're wrong. At least now, he has no other choice but to satisfy the two of you. "And what are you going to do now, Colonel?" You asked seductively, your fingertips tracing the back of his neck which sent a shiver down his spine. "Do what I do best" He answered and kissed you, taking a hold of your jaw to immediately deepen the kiss.

You moaned as he forced his tongue inside you, the sheer size making you gasp for air as he roamed your wet cavern. The effect he had on you was unspeakable, just with a kiss, he was able to make you fall on your knees for him. You sloppily returned the gesture while your hands held onto his broad shoulders, nails digging in his blue skin. His other hand roamed your stomach and chest, so big that he was covering almost the entire space. At least he could map every single centimeter of your body. He took off your shirt and you gasped when his hand moved down your back and grabbed your ass, squeezing it in his hand as he continued to assault your mouth.

He had no problem with lifting the lower part of your body and placing you against him, his stiff member digging into you against the fabric. "So sweet of you to get this excited just by thinking about me" Quaritch said with a smile, eyeing your throbbing sex that was clearly visible underneath your pajamas. "I might have also thought about you sometimes when I was alone in my room in a rather… intimate way" The man confessed, recalling the night before he asked you out, his memory still as fresh as ever. Now, the moment he was waiting for finally arrived and he won't wait any longer to devour you.

You flinched at his iron grip on your hips that was threatening to desecrate your most intimate regions, suddenly a bit embarrassed of what was about to happen. Sure, you waited for this moment for quite some time and were eager to get it done as well but you couldn't help but shy away as his predatory look ate you alive. His hands tugged at the corners of your pants and before you could say anything, Miles swiftly took them off of you along with the underwear, letting your skin hit the cool air. You were now naked under him, your skin still hot from your previous ministrations and Quaritch's touches as you laid on the soft bed sheets. 

"Absolutely beautiful" He commented and leaned above you, his two fingers rubbing against your lower lip, asking for entrance. "Open up, sweetheart" Miles whispered with a heated voice and watched as you willingly parted your lips and let his digits slide inside of you. They were long and girthy, big enough to fill up your entire mouth as they lazily brushed against your tongue that was eagerly licking them. He played with muscle for a while, making sure that his skin was soaked enough with your saliva and pushed them further down your throat, making you gag at the sudden action.

The man let out a deep laugh as you tried to keep yourself together as they slipped up and down, before pulling them away from you. You coughed when your throat was released from his flesh abusing it and felt his index finger pressing against your opening. You felt pretty nervous at the sheer size that was at least twice as big as a normal human digit and gasped when he forced himself inside of you. "It's alright, all you have to do is relax" Miles whispered in your ear while slowly stretching you out as your hands dug into his shoulder, attempting to do what he asked you to. Calming down wasn't exactly the easiest but you tried anyway, growing used to the feeling of him now fully seated in your insides.

It hurt slightly but when he started to form a steady pace, you grew accustomed to him and the uncomfortable sensation began to disappear. A moan escaped your lips when you gave into the pleasure, bucking your hips against his hand as he worked on you. Encouraged by your noises, Quaritch launched an attack on your exposed neck, showering it with open mouth kisses. His tongue was hot and wet as he licked your warm skin, occasionally sucking on it to your approval. Soon, he added another finger to open you further, pushing them all the way till his knuckles touched your ass, amused by how easily you took him.

He thought that he wouldn't grow any harder yet he did as he felt your muscles squeezing around his digits so tightly. His mouth salivate at the thought of how good you will squeeze his throbbing member in a moment. Miles tried different techniques of stretching you out, enjoying every moan coming out of you whenever he changed it. Your toes curled whenever he hit a specific spot deep in your body as you held onto him, engulfed in the pleasure as you expressed your desires to him, babbling something about how good he made you feel and how you craved for more. His name kept rolling out of your tongue as he fucked you open, abusing your entrance to its limits in order to lengthen your bliss.

When he sensed that you were ready, Miles pulled out of you, staring down at your devastated form, a toothy grin creeping on his face as he swayed his tail in excitement. Still heavily panting and trembling, you watched as he slowly undressed himself in front of you, his muscles flexing as he proceeded to toss off the shirt over his head and his fingers immediately resting on his pants. He took pride in noticing your eyes widening at his pulsating erection that sprung from his boxers as he stripped himself of the last bits of fabric. It felt heavy against your stomach as it threatened to rearrange your guts.

"Are you sure this won't send me to the emergency room?" You asked in horror, making him laugh in response as he took his manhood and gave himself a few strokes. "It will fit just fine, don't worry" He reassured you, but you weren't having any of that. His shaft was enormous, in sync with the size of his body and you knew that taking him will be quite a challenge. "Lay on your stomach, sweetheart. I want to watch your ass while I fill you up" Quaritch commanded you in a raspy voice, his chest rapidly rising as he kept pleasuring himself. You swallowed nervously but complied, turning around and letting him lift your hips up.

Not being able to fully see him made you even more anxious but also excited. Your hands gripped a nearby pillow to brace yourself for what was about to come and you noticed your phone laying next to it. All of this started because you couldn't just keep on scrolling through it until you felt tired enough. You sucked the air in your lungs as you heard him spit on his member to make it wetter before pressing his heavy tip against your opening. "Miles!" You whined, when you felt him push his girthy length inside of you, forcing your walls to part and adjust to him. Damn it, you knew that he was big but not that big. The intrusion hurt like a bitch but it was the uncomfortable feeling of how much of him was filling you up that was the problem. 

"It's ok, sweetheart. We're taking it slow, alright?" Quaritch reassured you, before kissing the side of your face in an attempt to soothe your pain. Tears welled up in the corners of your eyes but you nodded anyway, knowing that soon the ache would disappear. The man started to thrust his hips against you, making sure to go at a slow pace to get you accustomed to him. Each time he slammed in your insides, his member went further inside of you, splitting you more than before. His palm grasped your neck to keep you in place as his thumb drew small circles on your skin. Miles growled each time your small ass sucked him in, watching his veiny manhood disappear each time he pushed himself against you.

You felt just as good as he imagined when he masturbated to the image of the two of you getting it done and now it was finally happening. His ears picked up the change in your voice as you were no longer growling in discomfort but moaning underneath him, your fingers digging into the soft material of the pillow as he railed you. The slow pace wasn't enough for him anymore, he wanted to ruin you, making sure that you knew how much he desired you from the moment he laid eyes on your frame. You cried out when he started pounding into you, his hips colliding with your ass as his strong arms curled around your waist with a bruising force.

"Wait, Miles! Not so.. fast!" You mumbled in between your whining, not sure if you could take the inhuman treatment he was delivering to you. "Really? I think you're enjoying yourself just fine, sweetie. Look how your body clenches around me. It's like it was made to wrap around my cock" He breathed out, drowning in the immense pleasure and continuing to hungrily slam his thick member inside of you. You were so bloody tight around him, making it barely possible for him to move in and out of you. It was torturous, yet you didn't protest, too immersed in the experience as well, your mouth hanging and only moaning his name as he pounded you like a woodpecker.

His tip brushed against every weak spot you didn't know you had as you felt every vein and ridge of his shaft rubbing against your walls. You will definitely have trouble walking afterwards, most likely sore from his ministrations. His hand rubbed against your back, sensing your muscles tense underneath his skin as he claimed your body, marking your hips with purple bruises as he held you. Everything about you made him grow animalistic, your captivating scent filling his nostrils, your broken voice calling out for him and your clenching walls squeezing him out of every worth he had.

All of your senses seemed to fade away as he kept driving into you, the only sounds you heard were the wet noises of skin meeting skin and the bed squeaking under the weight of the two of you. You had no idea how it didn't break as Quaritch was quite a big guy and the pace he set was inhumane. Your legs twitched each time he thrusted into you as your bodies collided with each other in a hungry dance for pleasure. You felt overwhelmed with ecstasy, each of his movements squeezing you out of your oxygen. You felt like a wreck underneath him and ready to burst at any moment, his raw penetration and throaty groans driving you insane.

He was basically laying on top of you now, holding himself still with one hand and digging into the soft flesh of your waist in the other. His hot, feverish breath hit your neck as his massive body caged you to the mattress, controlling you to fit his erratic thrusts, hitting your squelching insides as his member drove deep inside of you. You were lost and judging by the obscene sounds Miles made, he was as well, prompting your walls to tighten around his enormous length each time he changed the angle of his entry. Your reaction didn't go unnoticed, a deep moan leaving his lips as he increased his hard movements, savoring the wave of bliss. 

The sudden stimulation sent you over the edge, making you moan as your climax jolted through your system and pulsing through your veins. Prolonged by his hips continuously rolling against you, you were left a whining wreck that kept groaning against the pillow to muffle your noises at the overstimulation. After a moment, you felt him falter, fingers digging into your hips as his whole body went into shock as he growled, finishing deep inside of you. You shuttered when his warm fluids entered your insides, settling in your guts and pouring out of you as he kept still, making sure that you took every drop that left him. Sighing in relief that it was finally over, you rested your head on the mattress, coming down from the high of your orgasm. 

Quaritch leaned against you for a moment, trying to collect himself as well, with his shaft still stuffed inside your ass. After a while, he slowly pulled out of you, watching his load escape your entrance and pour down your legs as you whimpered at the sudden emptiness. He laid down next to you and pulled your body on top of him, enveloping you in a warm hug. You could feel his calming heartbeat against his firm chest as he rubbed your back in a comforting gesture. "Feeling tired now?" Miles asked with a smile and looked down at you. You only managed to slightly nod your head, murmuring something under your breath before closing your eyes. He knocked the living daylight out of you. All you could do is relax under his soft touch, letting your organism calm down from the intense activity. You heard the man say something snarky to you but you were too drenched out to come out with any sort of response, all the sounds around you started to disappear as you drifted off and finally fell asleep. 

[justmeinatree]

Think I’m Losing It

Summary : weed makes harry submissive. until it doesn’t.

TW : smut, subspace, breath play, drugs (weed)

Word Count : 2.2k

if there was one thing you loved about the moment harry took out some weed, it was the impending, absolutely amazing sex that would loom around the corner.

and this time was no different. both of you taking more bong rips than you could even count, your brain was properly mush. it started off with a roll of harry’s head, to face you. and it somehow turned into heavy kissing, harry humming out small whines and whimpers.

it was always like this. with a heavy weed induced fog, harry would fall a little on the submissive side. usually a role occupied by you, it originally took a bit of a learning curve to find your groove. 

the thing with the weed, is that it obviously affected you as well. so an idea had popped into harry’s head, convincing you once to wear a strap on, and letting him suck on it. you had given in, figuring that it may not do much for you, but if it was good for him, you wouldn’t mind at all. 

what you never expected was to actually be able to feel what he was doing. you swear it’s the absurd amount of thc in your bloodstream, but watching harry’s mouth work over the toy had your mind reeling. 

you could actually fucking feel the pull of harry’s lips, the suction of his cheeks, light gliding of his teeth from time to time, the expert flicks of his tongue on the head, even the gagging in the back of his throat when he took it too far. like you had actually grown a full fucking penis for this moment. 

and harry loved it. the complete bliss took over his features, whenever his mouth first made contact with the tip of the toy. he loved how submissive it made him feel, especially considering it was a fucking toy. 

but when you admitted to him that you could actually feel it, he fell into it even more. wanted you to know how good he could be. wanted you to be proud of him. wanted you to love it just as much as he did.

so needless to say, the routine was set. a lot of pot. and a strap on. which is where you both find yourselves right now.

you were on the bed, standing on your knees, watching harry below you, his mouth working over the toy. you thread your fingers through his hair, scratching at his scalp, “look at you, taking my cock so well.”

harry groans at the praise, sucking it in further, and a shiver shoots down your spine, your head lulling back for a moment, eyes fluttering shut. you give a harsh tug on his hair, chasing that feeling again.

as if on cue, harry groans again, your hips bucking forward, the dildo gliding down his throat. he gags momentarily pulling away, working his tongue over the tip as he catches his breath, giving his throat a small break.

you roll your head forward, eyes locking on his, watching some of his spit drip down his chin onto the bed. “can’t believe you’re fuckin dripping for my cock,” you groan, harry’s eyes fluttering shut as he sinks down on the toy again. 

you moan out loud, harry’s nose pressed against your lower belly. your entire body trembling, your mind reeling at the fog induced feeling of his throat constricting around an appendage you don’t even have.

harry quickly pops off the toy entirely, pushing himself up on his knees, all of a sudden towering over you, his lips slotting with yours.

one of his hands grips the side of your jaw to hold you in place, the other gently stroking the toy. “can feel me playing with your prick, hmm sweet girl ?” harry murmurs against your lips, your body trembling at his featherlight touches against the strap on.

“mhmm,” you hum, nodding, arms wrapping around harry’s neck, anchoring yourself to him. 

this, also, always ended up happening. like the flick of a switch, he was back into his dominant role. even harry didn’t know what caused it, if it was something you did, a sound you made, or just a feeling inside him. 

“what if i do this ?” he asks quietly, his hands leaving your body entirely, before falling on your breasts, forefinger and thumb closing in on your nipples and twisting. 

you cry out, your forehead falling to his shoulder, that being the first real touch he gives you tonight. in comparison to imaginary touches, it was fuckin electrifying. 

harry bites his lip at your reaction, not quite expecting so much from just a twist of your nipples. he tugs on them, his fingers eventually sliding off.

one of harry’s hands lands on the side of your neck, the other on your jaw, his thumb pressing under your chin until you’re looking up at him.

“been neglecting you haven’t i ?” he coos, his thumb stroking your throat, before his hands slide down your body, landing on your hips to unbuckle the toy. harry notices the string of your arousal that connects to the strap as he pulls it away, biting his lip, seeing just how wet tonight’s adventures have gotten you.

as he gets up closer to you, no more rigid toy in the way, lips slotting with yours, harry’s cock slides effortlessly through your slit. both of you moaning loudly, finally letting yourselves have attention where you craved it most.

“you’re so fucking wet, poppet,” he mumbles against your lips, his hand wrapped around your throat, right under your jaw, keeping a loose grip. “love when i suck your cock dont you ?” he asks quietly, lips ghosting over yours.

you were so fucking gone for him. your brain was literal green jello. you dont think you could have answered him even if you tried. but the words still got to you, shooting straight down to your cunt. 

as your head grew heavy, it dropped to harry’s chest, his hold on your neck tightening significantly at this angle. everything starts going fuzzy, your hands resting limply against harry’s toned stomach. 

you trust harry entirely, you know that he knows what he’s doing. it lets you fall into the complete blissfulness of it all. wholeheartedly knowing that you’re okay, he’s got you.

just as you start to feel everything go dark, harry’s other hand grips harshly into your hair, pulling your head up. you quickly gasp for air, your entire body prickling.

as your eyes flutter open, harry’s watching you attentively. he notices how glassy your eyes have become, how slow and laboured your breaths have become. you’re slipping for him. and although this isn’t the first time, it’s not something that happens all that often. he supposes that extra bowl of weed might be partly to blame.

he knows that you like it rough, but that you also need him to be kind. he could use your body, you enjoyed the physicality of it. but you needed him to speak sweetly to you. needed to feel safe and loved.

“lets lay you down, poppet,” harry hums, helping you get down on your back against the mattress. “don’t want you passing out on me, yeah ?” he coos softly. 

“tell me sweet girl,” he murmurs, hands roaming over your stomach, hips and thighs, avoiding any area you wanted to feel him most. “do you remember your colours ?” he always checked in with you, but he needed to know how far you had slipped before moving on. 

one time, you were so far gone, you couldn’t give him colours. that worried him a bit. but harry can read you, knows you inside and out better than anyone. he handled it perfectly, continuing on with things he knew you enjoyed most. always stopping long before he normally would when you have access to colours.

he watches you nod, mumbling out breathily, “green, yellow, red.”

“s’my good girl,” he coos, leaning over to kiss you, “always my good girl aren’t you ?”

you nod, humming, a small smile creeping over your lips, darting forward to press your lips to his again, and again. 

harry hums quietly against your lips, smiling softly, “lay back, poppet. m’gonna make you feel really good. deserve it dont you ?”

you relax fully into the mattress, your brain a little too far gone to properly answer him, feeling harry’s hands roaming over your stomach, fingertips lightly fluttering over the swell of your breast, a shiver running through your body. he then digs his nails into your ribs, scratching roughly down your sides to your hips.

you groan loudly, your entire body rolling, hips lifted off the bed, searching for any sort of touch. your pussy was throbbing, begging for the much needed attention it’s been deprived of so far this evening.

“pretty girl wants me touch her, hmm ?” harry asks, hands settling on your inner thighs, spreading your legs wide open for him.

and christ, you were so wet. your heat was leaking down your bum, clenching over nothing, clit puffy, just screaming to be touched.

“gotta make up for the neglect dont i ?” harry hums, fingertip dragging through your folds, collecting your arousal, swirling it around. “how about we see how many times you can cum for me ? how does that sound, poppet ?”

you whimper, nodding, trying to press yourself more into his teasing touch, “green harry, s’green.”

“so fuckin wet, bet i dont need to even prep you. look so ready for my cock. love that. love how fuckin ready you are. always ready to take me,” he taps his cock against your sopping cunt, watching the string of arousal connecting you both, every time he pulls away.

without so much as a second word, harry aims himself directly with your entrance, rolling his hips, his cock gliding effortlessly inside you, bottoming out instantly.

you moan loudly, your legs trying to close around his hips, your body trembling as your brain tries to catch up with the quick intrusion. 

“fuck pet, you were made for me,” harry groans, head tipping back, as he grinds into you, his prick rubbing over all the best, deepest spots inside you. spots you didn’t know existed until harry stepped into your life. 

a string of whimpery moans keep leaving your lips, unable to hold anything back. not that harry would let you anyway. your hips start bucking on their own accord, chasing more friction.

“want more dont you, sweet girl ?” he hums, working up a proper rhythm, the tip of his cock colliding over and over with the special spot inside you. as his fingers make contact with your clit, rubbing quickly up and down from the top of your entrance to your clit, your head rolls back, nails digging into any bit of harry’s skin you can reach.

“gonna cum already aren’t you ?” he moans, feeling your centre start to clench harder and harder around him. “c’mon poppet, first one yeah ? show me what your cunt can do for me.”

you couldn’t stop it even if you tried. your orgasm crashed over you so fast, harry’s words of encouragement, the incredible fog of weed, the buzz of subspace, the rough rubbing of your clit, the pulsing of your pussy over his cock. it was everything. he was everything.

he doesn’t stop. fucks you right through your orgasm, keeping the steady pace, his thumb working just the same over your clit. his other hand reaches up to grope over your breast, fingers working over your nipple.

your body was on overdrive. you never had the opportunity to come down from your high, the next orgasm rolling on, harry talking you through it again, “fuck, yeah, that’s it love, give it to me.”

this time though, he watches as your cunt gushes squirt after squirt, with each clench of your heat. “christ, again, poppet, want you fuckin empty. soak me, baby.”

he works harder, his thrusts deeper, his thumb flicking faster, another orgasm crashing over you before you even finished the last, another explosion of juices leaving your pussy.

“yes, yes, yes,” harry groans, “c’mon, keep going. know you can sweet girl. show me how much squirt you have in there.”

you were floating. swear to god you were fucking floating. your skin was so hot, so prickly, your lungs were gasping for any bit of breath, your centre quivering. but you couldn’t stop. didn’t want to stop. wanted to be harry’s good girl. wanted to show him what you could do for him. 

harry works you through multiple more orgasms, your brain much too foggy to even begin grasping how many you’ve had, squirting through each of them, until you had almost nothing left.

“last one pet, yeah ?” harry hums. “cunt’s pretty empty, gonna cum with me this time ? one more, be my good girl.”

you whimper loudly, his words reaching your consciousness, as his hand wraps around your throat, squeezing tightly.

your body wracks itself through another orgasm, everything going momentarily black.

once you come to, harry’s pulled out of you, he’s laying next to you, trailing kisses over your neck, fingertips soothingly rubbing your stomach, listening to his sweet whispers as he goes, “perfect girl. perfect for me yeah ? always so fuckin perfect.”

……

Masterlist

[september-rainn]

Donnie darko agere hcs perhaps? 🤨

Little!Donnie Darko Headcanons

✮⋆˙ 1/2/3 - 4/5/6 - 7/8/9 ✮⋆˙

I am surprised I haven't done this earlier, he's my everything. I cannot believe it took an ask to get this made. I've seen a lot of headcanons about him being transgender and I kind of see it, so I'm following the masses and incorporating it

CW: Mentions of pills & dysphoria

☆ Donnie's little age is anything pre-puberty, typically ranging from 5 to 8, but can slip as young as 2 when especially stressed or as old as 11 when on the cusp of regressing

★ He tends to slip into little space when with his therapist (due to hypnotherapy, though he hardly counts it), when extremely anxious, or when extremely dysphoric.

☆ He's primarily pre-puberty to help with discomfort in his body due to maturing. Part of it is because he mourns never having a "masculine" childhood, and wants to live that out like every other boy got to do.

★ He refuses to have a caregiver. He fantasizes about having one, and what it'd be like, but is too independent to allow anyone to take care of him

☆ Doesn't mean people, primarily his sister and mother, haven't tried. He's more open to letting Elizabeth care for him in small doses. He starts to get agitated if he feels she's impeding too much on his "little" time

★ THE KING OF TANTRUMS!! He'll scream, he'll cry, he'll stomp his feet, he'll throw things, he'll rip things up. He has a hard time managing frustration when he is little. This contributes to his adamancy on not having a caregiver; he doesn't wish to subject someone to his fits

☆ Fiddles a lot. He loves having things to fidget with. His go-to is the strings of his hoodie, and small handheld trinkets, like a Rubik's cube. Not much of a teether. Needs to keep his hands occupied

★ Loves coloring books!! He steals Samantha's coloring books, too shy to get any on his own. Samantha notices. She doesn't say anything

☆ He loves drawing too. Depending on how old he is, it can be pen scribbles or well-thought-out doodles. He holds the pen in his fist to make his drawings look more child-like

★ He still had the doggy stuffed animal he got from his therapist. He has an unhealthy attachment to it, In and out of regression. He panics if he doesn't have easy access to it. Washing it has always been a pain

☆ The only little gear he had ever gotten for himself (aka not stolen from Samantha) was a sippy cup. Mostly drinks mixed berry juices and sparkling water

★ Samantha and Donnie play together sometimes when he's regressed. The trampoline is their favorite toy to play with. Samantha isn't aware of his regression, but she's happy he plays with her

☆ Surprisingly, he's more willing to take his pills when regressed. His brain is too foggy to conceptualize if he needs the pills or not, nor what they say about him (will fuss a little. It's tradition)

★ Only eats soft foods. Things like cakes, bread, soup, bananas, etc.

☆ Unsurprising; He likes watching the Smurfs, alongside other cartoons. He loves to curl up with a blanket and his stuffed doggy and binge episodes for hours

★ Has glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling, and a few dangling over his bed

☆ Despite his age being on the older side, he loves crib accessories, like mobile hangings and soothing bedside toys. He has one from when he was a child that plays a faint lullaby

★ Needs calming noise to sleep. Either white noise, a lullaby if he's feeling bold, or the calming voice of another. The latter hasn't occurred outside of his mind, but to him, it works all the same

☆ Plays a lot of board games. He has a hard time finding people to play with him. He's a sore loser. He plays with himself. It makes him sad. It makes him more regressed.

★ If he did have a caregiver, he'd want to call them mommy or miss. Not interested in having a male caregiver-- He's too much of a mama's boy. He's so weak to motherly attention

☆ Would cry if an older woman said he did good. Needs praise to survive

★ Someone kiss this boy on the cheek I think he needs it !!!!

[mashiraostail]

Hi there, I was wondering if you would write some vlad, Kugo, and hound dog x fem reader with nipple piercings and how you think the guys would feel abt them, if they like them or not and if they play with their nipples more because of it I love your writing btw 🖤

I'm gonna start going through old asks but feel free to send new ones! I have mine done and they certainly slay. I did also spend the past two years getting crazy body mods and making myself unemployable hehehe idk what this phD is even for because I'm big time tatted up.

I wanted to start with my best boys (esp Kugo :3) and some headcanons. I've been rewatching the show which is what made me think abt and miss the blog a little. Idk if the demand for MHA content is still there so I'll probably make an updated post with other shows and media I enjoy (big Bauldr's gate rn!!! yall already KNOW who it is.) NSFW under the cut!

Vlad: *I think he would be the least surprised upon noticing them. He's maybe seen them on other partners, or just is familiar with the concept. *the first time he notices them through your shirt probably went something like this: You're fresh out of the shower, pajamas sticking to your still damp skin as you pop into the kitchen for a drink. The relationship is new, and he's still in awe of you. He's always eyeing you in an appreciative way, especially when you're freshly showered, his eyes climb up your exposed legs shimmering from your body lotion, to your stomach and waist, and of course to your chest. Usually they'll slide up to your shoulders and linger on your neck and the cut of your jaw, but today they stop. Your shirt was smaller than usual, and of course it complimented your chest but there was something else. "What?" You pull the bottle of water away from your lips, "do I have toothpaste on me?" "No." He shakes his head, "no you don't." You cap the bottle and shrug, starting to walk by him, "I'm gonna go watch the-" Before you can get by him he grabs you by your arm, "what is that?" He's looking at your chest again. "My boobs-" "No I know." He looks up at your face, "are those your-" "Oh yea. I guess you've never seen them like this before huh? You can see them through a tight shirt." He's blinking, he's taking it in. All you can do is laugh, "go ahead." "No I'm an adult. I don't need to squeeze-" "It's fine, go ahead." You bridge the short gap between your lips and kiss him, holding him by his jaw and pressing the full weight of your body against his. After the fact he might be slightly apologetic for getting worked up so easily. *H's probably the most delighted by them too. I feel like he's just a horny guy, he's easily worked up, his brain always goes right to the wrong place. *Wearing a baby tee with no bra underneath so he can see them prominently will drive him up a wall. *He might get used to it with time, but all you have to do to hook him in is lean over the table at him, get him to look a little too long and he'll be bent at your will. *He loves them, he loves when you change the jewelry, colorful rhinestones, short chains, or captive hoops are all equally enticing to him. Red is his favorite on you though. *He'll lavish them with attention in bed, especially when he's going down on you, one of his hands is always occupied. If you're especially sensitive you'll need to tell him. *He likes to use his mouth too, the metallic taste on his tongue paired with the taste of your skin is a huge turn on for him.

_________

Kugo: *Most perplexed. He's probably not encountered them before. Show him the ropes, let him know they help rather than hurt and he'll be good. The first time he sees them he's going to have a lot of questions: Honestly, getting into a car and going home with Gang Orca was not necessarily in your plans for the evening. If anyone asked Kugo, taking home a random reporter was also not like him at all, in fact he had never done it. Maybe it wasn't fair to call you random, he had your phone number, you'd met before, you even had a friendly and slightly flirtatious banter. Maybe you had been sending him signals all along, maybe he had failed to pick them up, until now. He doesn't even get the chance to ask you if you're sure about this, if you want to sleep with him, if you'd been hinting at that this whole time, because you're straight to business as soon as his front door closes, climbing him like a tree. He guesses you were sure. Your excitement was contagious, you were handsy and giggly tugging him further into his home. You end up ontop of him, stopping your assault of kisses to sit up around his waist, "hey are you sure you want to..." You trail off, hands at the hem of your shirt, "I won't be offended, I was probably coming on so strong this whole time." You laugh a little but Kugo shakes his head, "take off your shirt." Your sweater flys off, something about the fact you've been bare skinned under that sweater all night makes his stomach warm with arousal. His eyes catch two shiny, metallic adornments. He reaches up instinctively to touch them. One hand still holding your waist. Your gasp makes him pull back. "Sorry does it-" "No it doesn't hurt." You catch his hand before he can pull it away any more, "the opposite." He spends most of your first sexual encounter fixated on them, licking, brushing his fingers over them, squeezing and so on, but you don't mind. *That being said he'll grow to love them as well. *Especially enjoys seeing you touch them in bed. *If you're riding him he won't be able to keep his hands off though. *Doesn't have a preference for jewelry, but if you ask him to pick you out something he'd secretly be delighted, he'd probably pick a barbell with some small charms on the ends, maybe hearts. *Lowkey already a huge boob guy so they just draw more attention to what he likes!

______

Hound Dog: *Mostly indifferent, doesn't get the point. *Until you're fucking, then he gets the point, then he likes them. A lot. *He doesn't avoid them during sex but he doesn't give them special attention either until one specific night: You're in missionary below him, his hands are holding onto your waist as his pace increases from dizzying to bruising. He likes to watch your face, your furrowed brows and the way you draw your lips between your teeth drive him nuts, it's almost impossible to get his eyes off. He'll let his gazy flicker downwards though, he likes your body almost as much as he likes your face, seeing the bounce of your stomach or the way your thighs shake is also rewarding for him. Today he stops on your chest though, bouncing to his almost abusive pace the dim light in the room catches on the jewelry, it's tantalizing, begging to be touched. When he ducks his head down to roll his tongue over one the moan you let out and the way you say his name would have probably made him cream his pants honestly, and the cherry on top is the way you hold the back of his head, practically burying him in your chest. Safe to say he gets the appeal after. *Lowkey likes rings better than barbells, he'll start to gently tug them, enjoying the way it makes you buzz. *Likes to pick jewelry out for you, for all your piercings, wants them all to match!

[sophie-frm-mars]

Hi Sophie. I enjoy reading your longer Tumblr posts. It's been a while since I've read a leftwing essayist whose work has really grabbed me. Any recommendations for modern leftwing essayists whose work is worth reading? (articles, columns, editorials, online magazines, etc.)

Honestly most of my work (and long tumblr posts, which I suppose are still work kind of lmao patreon dot com slash sophie from mars) is informed by books and those tend to be older, like I wanted to say bell hooks for a second now and then I remembered that she died in 2021 (rip). Maybe it's just that there's so much good theory to get through that's already stood the test of time, but I appreciate the question so as much as I'm currently enjoying Kierkegaard's the Sickness Unto Death i know it's not what you're asking for in like 6 diffferent ways.

The problem with recommending contemporary stuff is that you can never recommend anything in gestalt and i wouldn't expect people to recommend me as always totally good either but I hope that's understood. I'm subscribed to Organise! magazine and I think they regularly publish really sound political analysis. If you are interested in books, I had Half-Earth Socialism on preorder and I've been enjoying that since it came out. Not writing, but I think the Seriously Wrong Podcast boys are the best ones doing it right now, their stuff is very well researched, written and argued and delivered in a fun and humorous style as well.

I like a lot of feminist authors at the moment. It was feminism that brought me to the left in the first place and I've basically always said that marxism (or equally anarchism) without a feminist lens is essentially useless. I think that feminists have been leading the charge in properly analysing and understanding systematic and structural violence and oppression for a long time, especially trans feminists like Julia Serano or black feminists like, again, bell hooks. but since your question is about contemporary writers who write articles / essays etc, I really like Amia Srinivasan (her essay collection The Right To Sex is utterly astonishing), Catherine Angel (Tomorrow Sex Will Be Good Again is a book that changed my life), Kai Cheng Thom (her substack is great and her book I Hope We Choose Love is fantastic too). I also quite like Clementine Morrigan, her articles explore quite uncomfortable conversations about anti-carceral approaches to social justice and trauma, and her podcast is actually where I heard an interview with Catherine Angel which is why I ended up buying her book.

I know you didn't ask for books but I can't let a recommendations post go by at the moment without talking about Abolition Revolution by Shanice Octavia McBean and Aviah Sarah Day because it is simply occupying SO much of my brain at the moment

thanks for the question

[icy-book]

Practical advice for recovering from a panic attack/anxiety episode/spiral, since google isn't any help

Note, this isn't for when you are still actively in the above. This is for when you've calmed down and you're still emotionally fragile and probably shattered:

Drink water. What you've just been through is physically exhausting, you need to rehydrate. Especially if you've been crying. Plus, if you can manage it, actively getting up and getting water for yourself can stop you from immediately spirally back down again by giving you something to focus on

Eat something, ideally with sugar. Same reason as above, you need fuel. Sugar is good for the instant energy and feel good chemical hit (I personally love making a cookie in a mug because it gives me something to focus on and time to get my head on straight)

Sleep. Again: you're almost certainly exhausted. You need rest. Plus, you can't spiral if you're unconscious, and turning your brain off and on again will fix a lot of errors. Have a nap, or if you're like me and spiral late at night, you need to go to bed anyway

If you can't do that (falling asleep can be hard and the last thing we want is you lying there spiraling again) watch a video. Or, really, do anything that will actively engage your mind. Something that will comfort you is good, help relax you and let your brain know you're safe and there's no threat. This doesn't mean you have to watch something stereotypically comforting or relaxing if stuff like Bob Ross doesn't work for you - anything you like is good

Get comfortable. By which I mean, do anything that brings you comfort. Make a nest of blankets, hug your plushies, put on your favourite music, jerk off, etc, etc, etc. Again, this is all about reminding your brain that the tiger it thinks it's fighting is gone.

Side note to the above point - you probably don't want to "take a nice relaxing bath" as people often foolishily recommend, unless you already know this works for you. This gives you too much time with your thoughts and not enough to occupy your mind, so it's much easier to spiral which, again, we want to avoid. If you're someone who benefits from baths, go for it, but otherwise avoid it

This list isn't exhaustive, so feel free to add on with stuff that helps you! I just made this because dealing with the aftermath of a panic attack is rough and Google only gives you advice for managing your mental health long term, or actively getting out of a panic attack