#word vomit in tags

[bluespiritshonour]

You know what would make for a great story? Sokka demanding that Zuko find his space sword (I have personal bias in favour that dark blade mmrrrr, sexy, yeah I'm thirsting over a blade)

Because... Zuko's really good at finding things. He found Aang. The Gaang had been looking for Appa for days—but Zuko found him the day he started looking. He found his mum. He's meant to find things.

And Sokka just bam slam bursts in one day and says “hurry up! We're gonna find my sword. You owe me that much!”

And they go on a nice (or not so nice) little adventure.

[otome-dissection]

Idk man I just think that mizu/ena5 and its progression was really beautiful actually. I just think that the release of the ena5 song was also really beautiful and kind of the nail in the coffin for me and I haven't been able to get the event(s) out of my head all week and that I kind of want to talk about it, actually.

It's about being hurt so deeply and continuously that any kindness that could be offered to you manages to feel like a sin, that it makes you crumble and shatter but for all the wrong reasons, not because of the newfound safety, not out of relief, but something worse and more deeply ingrained in you than kindness ever was. It's about carefully measuring the distance at which you keep others away from yourself, to ensure that it never happens again ("To save yourself the trouble", if that makes it easier).

It's about realizing that the people you've been spending all this time with are drifting closer, that they just might bump up against the unsightly parts of yourself that you've tried to keep locked away, it's about turning around and sprinting at full speed and slamming the door shut and holding onto the handle behind you to stop it from turning, because you're as frightened of the possibility of another wound being inflicted on you as you are of the possibility that kinder, gentler hands will reach out and smooth over the exposed scar. It's about hating eyes that judge and silently condemn you as much as you hate eyes that simply see you and take all of you in without scrutiny, because no matter what they're looking and they're looking at you and they know that your hand's on that door handle and they know that you're hiding something because, as much as you try to keep it shut, they've seen through the crack that you foolishly left open.

(The prominence of eyes in Bake no Hana, specifically eyes looking and searching, and finally landing on you, the viewer, Mizuki, is so fucking. Visceral in my opinion. Every character in the MV stares at the viewer in a deadpan, almost judging way. Even though Mizuki knows deep down that niigo won't really hate them, won't judge them, she just can't stand their kindness either; any gaze directed at her is a loss, another prick in their skin. It screams "don't look at me" while making sure that you know, with horrific certainty, that they're looking for you, that you're being watched. You can't go outside, can't leave your room, because they're searching for you, and while that should be reassuring, to you it's anything but).

It's about not wanting to be dissected, whether it's with hands that want to pull your organs apart or stitch them back together because no matter what they're there, and they're getting frighteningly close to your heart. It's about blinding yourself and covering your eyes to it all because seeing means exposure and exposure means they're taking something from you and you can't do anything about it, much less take it all back, much less have a say in the matter. Everyone's just taking and taking and taking and you wish you could just be alone. You wish everyone would just disappear and you could live in a world all to yourself, for only yourself (but is that really what you want?).

It's about the way that, near the beginning of the Yoka ni Mitoreta MV, Mizuki and her loneliness is represented as a dark, splotchy stain in the shadows. No colors, no patterns, no way to clean it or wash it all away, just raw ugliness marring a blank canvas. It's about the way that Ena reaches out to it anyway, the way she startles when the glass shatters just when she finally starts reaching forward, the way that the rest of the MV/song represents her searching for and reaching only further out to Mizuki, even if the broken shards of glass will only cut her fingers, potentially leaving scars.

It's about how, in every way, subtly, directly, consciously, and subconsciously, Ena shows that she fucking cares.

It's about the way that Ena lets Mizuki have autonomy, despite the situation being so horribly out of their control. And it's such a delicate thing: If she really wants to, Mizuki can take the opportunity to just run away, keep running forever, repeat the cycle over and over, and maybe she'll just destroy herself with it again, but it can't be denied that it's something important to them, something she can't quite live without just yet, their means of survival. Mizuki's autonomy is their identity, it's her tailoring her own clothes and choosing her own ribbons and styling her own hair the way she does. Ena letting them have that is as much about trust as it is about understanding that Mizuki of all people should have this right, when control was something stripped from her throughout so much of her life. She couldn't control how she was born, how people look at her or why, can't control what they think of her; lacking control has only left Mizuki vulnerable to the cruelties of others, has only caused them to suffer, which is why it's so important that it's given to them now.

She had the control to make the choice to see niigo's welcoming love and run away instead of staying, and she has the control to make the choice now whether she wants to keep things the way they are or take a step forward to be at their side again. She has every right to have it, and I think the fact that Ena realizes and respects that, even if it's subconsciously, is really beautiful (there is an entire fucking Verse about this in the new song and just. God Look at this. It's so caring, unconditional, and for fucking What. I think there is something to be said about how much Ena is willing to put aside for Mizuki, and maybe deep down it isn't healthy, but for now I'm just kind of in awe)

It's about how insanely patient Ena has been this whole time. Mizuki says that she basically lied to Ena's face about telling her their secret, even after Ena said with such conviction that she would wait for Mizuki as long as it takes, and Ena is just kept waiting and waiting and worrying like this seemingly indefinitely. It's about how Mizuki danced around it, avoided it, kept the distance, straight up ran when she was finally pushed, but Ena still chased anyway when she saw that she couldn't wait anymore, kept chasing just enough to intervene and get a straight answer out of Mizuki when she really needed to, but still leaving her enough space to leave if that was truly what she wanted. It's about how relieved Ena is the moment that Mizuki finally says outright how much they want to be with her and niigo, how much she wants to try, how much more light Ena's voice sounds when she grabs her hand, relieved, the way that the relief she feels can be felt through the music, throughout the entirety of Yoka ni Mitoreta, the way that warm colors always follow her when she chases after Mizuki, just to hold onto her and stop her from running away completely.

It's about how that careful combination of Ena's directness, Ena's persistence, Ena's warmth, her patience, her bluntness about her feelings, the way she chases and holds on but not too tight and her regard for how unsafe and exposed Mizuki feels actually works and breaks it all down. It's about how she really did reach through to Mizuki, despite the thorns and broken glass shards and nearly-unfulfilled promises, the way that Mizuki did finally let her turn the door handle and step through to see what she'd been hiding all this time, the way that Mizuki's hand, limp, when Ena first grabs onto it, shifts to hold hers back as they cry in the face of Ena's gentleness.

Despite how harsh Mizu/Ena5, and even Ena herself as a character can be (or at least was in the very beginning of pjsk), everything is somehow gentle and warm in the end, blindingly so. And you know what, I think that's beautiful. And what's even more beautiful than that is how Mizuki allows themself to crumble and shatter under that kindness, that warm light, but this time, finally, out of relief.

On a final note, I just want to say that I also appreciate how all that didn't have to solve everything. The scars haven't disappeared, haven't gone away, and Mizuki knows that their desire to run hasn't gone away forever, and maybe it never truly will. But for now they've calmed it, at least a little. She's learning to allow herself to be seen, learning that when someone's fingertips brush over their scars the way Ena's did that it's only out of care, and that maybe taking in that care and allowing herself to feel kindness and safety is okay. They're safe, for now, somehow. They're learning. They're trying. And I think that's cool :)

[enidtendo64]

Hi!

I just wanted to let you know that I think your art style is beautiful, and it always makes my day better when I see you post something because it's just so unique!

May I ask you about your thoughts on Dipcificia (I hope I'm spelling that right), and their relationship and what their favorite things might be about each other? By the way, have you heard of Over the Garden Wall? (cuz smoetimes people make otgw and gravity falls related posts). I didn't really want to waste your time and I apologise if I did, that was not my intention :) and I hope you have a wonderful day/night!

Hi! Aw man thank you so much!

Oh I have too many thoughts about them—I’m on like a lunch break rn so I might not have much time to speak how much I want on them buuuuut I do have a relationship meme I did a while back that I can post here and explain a bit!

So, here’s the thing, I think depending on the situation/AU/whatever they might have some different things in their dynamic, but I think overall a key feature to their relationship in any setting is that there needs to be banter!

Pacifica likes that Dipper is just as sassy as she is and isn’t afraid to call her out while still having that support system she needs, and just being someone she knows likes her for her and not her money or status.

Dipper likes that Pacifica despite the haughty toity stuff and bratty exterior is a real and witty person who can be brave and cares about people (even if it’s deep down) and bc she has these nuances and isn’t an ideal like he’d made for Wendy in his head, he can actually talk to her and have a good relationship.

Ok now this one is gonna veer more into headcanons but these first two are supported by canon so! I think Dipper enjoyed heavily the fact Pacifica is secretly nerdy, or at least nerdy without realizing. Canonically Pacifica is like, level 100 at some overwatch/warcraft hybrid that I’m convinced is the GF equivalent of League of Legends, and I have a heavy headcanon that Pacifica is so naturally good at numbers and shit like the reason she’s so good at minigolf is just like she sees the angles. Which is funny to be good at geometry when your series’ big evil dude is a triangle. Also Abigale Northwest reference of her being a tinkerer/engineer. I think Pacifica would decimate him in video games or any games in general and Dipper would be both parts competitively upset and genuinely impressed.

And theeennnn this is also backed by canon: I think Dipper is secretly a huuuuge romantic, liek does all the sweet shit type of romantic. I mean we’ve seen his elaborate Wendy plots, and I think it just makes sense for a guy who likes to plan to plan romantic stuff. And maybe he’d also like for someone to do stuff like that for him in return! He might not admit it but everyone picks up on it real quick I think. Pacifica is both surprised and endeared, if not used to it since she comes from a home that doesn’t really express affection. I don’t think she’s ever had anyone actually say they love her, and then here comes Mr. 12 step date plan. I think it just makes her fall even more!

Let’s see, I also think Pacifica falls first, Dipper falls harder. Paz got a crush at the end of NWMM, Dipper would finally realize he liked her like maybe the next summer or so, but by that point Pacifica has resigned herself to having a crush she will never speak of ever bc it’s embarrassing and also she has no clue how to give and receive affection. She’s still learning! I think it differs based on the situation but for post series canon, I’d like to think they started dating/long distancing like first or second year of high school and ended up being high school sweethearts. Bc I think it’s cute!

Let’s see what else…uh Dipper confesses first, Pacifica was his first kiss but Pacifica’s first kiss was when she was younger with some snooty boy and it was unwanted and she cried bc he was being an asshole who took it from her, and her parents didn’t give af. Typical. They both start arguments, though Dipper apologizes first only BARELY. They’re both equally stubborn. Pacifica will apologize if she knows it’s her in the wrong (like idk saying please thank you and sorry) but if it’s a real, both sides hurt and got hurt, type of argument, Pacifica edges out in the “how stubborn can I be” race. And then Paz brings up the past more bc it’s the most she can reference with her sheltered upbringing, and Dipper talks more bc Pacifica is genuinely interested in his interests even if she doesn’t outright admit it sometimes but also I think Pacifica tends to have gotten used to not talking as much unless it’s to judge so she’s got a lot of shit to unlearn, so she just reacts to being spoken to more than starting the convo, if that makes sense. And then Pacifica is more sacrificial bc I do think Dipper is super giving and definitely protective (they both are but Dipper more so since he’s just canonically like that) but I think Pacifica is more the type to sacrifice way more than she can give if it means doing what’s right. Even if she hates it lol. (The bell, idk wtf happened with her there but she’s genuinely scared out of her mind about that bell and yet she’s willing to risk it all!)

Ok and then lastly! I have seen OTGW! I love that show! It’s really well animated and the storyline is sweet!

And thank you, I hope you have a wonderful night too!

[mllenugget]

Just wanted to redraw a few screenshots and then I got awfully carried away ꜜ Close uuuups ꜜ

I was going to apologize for always being part of weird fandoms. I was thinkng to myself "wow you really do have shit tastes in fiction" but then I figured out

It's not that I don't enjoy good fiction, I have recently binge watched all of Mamoru Hosoda's movies, which are all really brilliant. But here's the thing, I watch it, I go "yup, that was great" and then I'm satisfied with myself and I never talk about it ever again

You know what has gotten me to yap and rant for the past 12 years of my life though ? Total Drama.

And all things considered : The reboot was alright !

[salty-an-disco]

don't know if I'll get to draw anything for pride, but here's something I need to put out there:

Slay the Princess is probably the most aromantic love story I ever seen

from the way it's told, to how the characters go about it, there's just smth inherently aromantic about the love story between Shifty and Quiet. Smth about how attraction is rarely brought up, how even the most straightforward romantic routes go about it in an unconventional way, the way the characters themselves describe their care and love for each other– it's just so. so very queer in many ways. And as an aromantic person who almost never feels any form of attraction and relates to loveless aros, there's just smth really comforting about a love story that goes about it in the most unconventional ways possible.

[ivvyela]

thinking about that theory where peter parker is the mcu's anchor being. and like. the possibilities of it. imagine learning your entire universe's anchor being, the person who pretty much controls the fate of the universe, is some guy who just doesn't exist??? not even dropped off the face of the earth, but there is no proof of this person even existing in the first place???? and maybe strange or the fantastic four or whoever feels responsible for/is tasked with finding and protecting this anchor being but that's kinda hard to do when you have Absolutely Nothing to go off of.

or alternatively, peter himself learning that the entire universe is basically relying on him staying alive, and he already has a lot on his shoulders but this??? having lost everything and everyone and now learning that the weight of the world is literally on his shoulders and fuck!!! he just wanted to be a friendly neighborhood spider-man but that's parker luck for you!!

and like. there's so many ways to take it and i haven't seen anyone considering this and guys. guys. consider it. take it and run with it or what have you. fuck it and throw doctor doom in the mix for the irondad girlies because surely that will be fun.

and i know i know the theory doesn't fully go hand in hand with the mcu cannon but. fuck the cannon. let me scream into the void about this. let me shove it in your faces and hope someone does something with it. let me have my silly where's waldo peter parker anchor being au.

[surreal-duck]

master artist and his number one fan

guy who is being so normal about the new additions to their profiles. i think abt midoris initial infatuation with his art slowly developing into appreciating yuzuru himself as a person and idol to the point he worries about how he sees him (ex: a bit of home party and in workplace survival rules) sometimes thats a lie i think about it a lot. and yuzuru learning to enjoy art just for the sake of drawing!! seeing the lets try diy story where he doesnt even refute drawing on midoris desk and was only worried that his doodles might cover up the mascot design compared to how discouraged he usually would be in earlier ! stories. everything to me i adore their dynamic if that wasnt obvious by *gestures to basically everything*

and happy pride month ����‍🌈

[rooolt]

the thing to me about Demetri in season 6 is that it very much feels like he’s still clinging to the old version of Eli like just a little bit. Like he accepts that his hair is different and he dresses different and he likes karate now, but Demetri never calls him hawk and is still talking for him and still expects the two of them to go to MIT like nothing has changed. We as an audience can understand that Eli has hated every version of himself until around like season 4 or season 5, including who he was before karate and before the show, but to Demetri that version of Eli was his best friend, he loved that version of Eli and I think to him the rejection of MIT really solidifies that Eli will never be that person again. Like, I think Demetri was like “well he’s not hawk anymore so now my best friend Eli is back” but to Eli, I think he’s trying to be someone new, not the kid who was bullied and not the person who hurt his best friend. I think that season 6 is a little bit about the two of them reckoning with the people they are now and the people they want to be in college

[frozen-seagrass]

The WALL-E au no one asked for

[whatapunk]

Look we can talk all day about why the Rebels episode “The Honorable Ones” is amazing but honestly my absolute favorite moment of all of it is when Zeb is going to go pick up the glowing rock and Kallus sounds like a terrified child asking him where he’s going and the voice acting in that moment is award-level brilliant and it’s the most real that man has ever been or sounded up to that point and it just completely does things to me idk

[shelfperson]

OKAY OKAYYYYY OKAY like i understand why people are bullying louis right now. it’s not a great look to dick down the guy who just now threatened to murder you and your daughter. but taken from louis’ perspective? without our foreknowledge of the plot? for all he knows he’s just gained an important and powerful ally.

like???? before armand spares louis, he does the whole “why are the powerful so weak” speech with the obvious implication that he doesn’t want to enact the Great Laws on louis specifically. and then he… doesn’t. And then, and this is crucial, opens up to louis about ALSO having his heart broken by lestat. which puts him in a place of automatic solidarity with him. and then he kisses him! as assad said the post-show breakdown, armand had to choose between the coven and louis in that moment and he chose louis.

like as far as louis is concerned, he and claudia are safe. at the very least, sage from armand specifically.

and like. i am absolutely 100% certain armand will have something to do with claudia’s death but i kind of doubt that armand is just like. masterminding from the shadows all day everyday and is retroactively altering the ENTIRE NARRATIVE. that’s just so boring. he becomes a non-character at that point.

what i think is much more likely is what a lot of people have been theorizing about: santiago stages a coup because armand is a fucking hypocrite and makes armand pick between claudia or louis. and armand is going to pick louis. and that’s what armand is hiding from louis. not that he personally killed her in cold blood but that he killed her through inaction/indirect action.

i’m also super exited to see the resentment between claudia and armand ramp up from here. like HELLO CHOKESLAM WHAT THE FUCK???? get AWAY from her.

anyway i bet armand and claudia have some really adversarial interactions after this point and that’s part of what armand doesn’t want louis to see in claudia’s diaries. like the two of them are perfectly positioned to activate the other’s trauma’s/hangups because they’re BOTH afraid of being abandoned they BOTH know what it’s like to always be someone’s second choice and they both really want louis to pick the other.

on top of that, i’m sure armand’s scary ass is having his disney villain “if it weren’t for those meddling middle aged kids” moment about claudia at some point too.

like i doubt he “could not prevent it” but i also think a little more nuance, a little more conflict, is much better than Bad Man does Bad Scary Thing because he’s craaaaaaaazyyyy.

this has become a rambling mess but the POINT IS. there’s a little more going on then louis just letting jeff the killer into his house out of sheer dickmatization. there’s layers.

[malvolios-yellow-stockings]

fellas is it gay to be a directionless lonely insomniac approaching your 30s without having accomplished heterosexual milestones of settling down and having kids and also not having an outlet to exorcise your feelings of loneliness, shame, dejection and inadequacy, being a faceless consumer in the age of neoliberal hegemony who is unable to form meaningful human connections or feel pleasure in any meaningful capacity. is it then gay to only be vulnerable in support groups where others believe you are dying or seriously ill, in groups where you are frequently embraced by other men who share your sense of urgency, in the only context where everyone can get over being temporarily embarrassed and ashamed of their flood of emotions?

is it then gayer that this scheme you built for yourself is obstructed when a woman disrupts the all-male group you go to and that woman is everything you don't want yourself to be - a "weak person", outwardly self-loathing and ironic, painfully self-aware, lethargic and hysterical at the same time, undoubtedly feminine and carelessly vulnerable and only violent towards herself, never others (maybe that she’s free in all the ways you are not)? is it gayer still that this disruption triggers the appearance of another "man" in your life who is your own edgy, idealised version of maleness, masculinity & manhood. (is it gay that you show your anger and jealousy towards this woman, expressing your distaste by saying “if only i had wasted a couple of minutes and gone to watch marla singer die and none of this would’ve happened” after your idealised man saves her from suicide and has sex with her very loudly so you can hear (“i could’ve moved to another room… where i might not have heard them. but I didn’t”?) Is it gayer still that you reject her advances multiple times later on while loudly expressing your disinterest in her sexually)

fellas is it gay that this man turns your life upside down, convincing you to found a club that by definition and principle excludes women (“it’s for men only”), where men intimately fight underground, in a dark basement on an increasingly regular basis and where your fighting partner is almost always different every time, where you recognize each other in the wild but are instructed not to be publicly open about your membership to this secret fraternity of sorts (almost resembling the dynamics of gay cruising and hook-up culture)? is it gay that your previous need to be embraced by men in a no-questions-asked context is replaced by the same but different mechanism/ritual, this time with expected, welcomed and consensual violence intricately tying your idea of freedom and therefore pleasure with pain? fellas is it gayer still that the guy who taught you to embrace and overcome that pain lives with you and kisses your hand before leaving a chemical burn there in a shape suspiciously resembling lips?

is it gay to semi-ironically describe your co-habitation with him as married life, comparing yourselves to ozzie and harriet while tying this guy's tie, this action making you the (house)wife of the pair, then later on basically imagining that he slaps your ass after handing you beer to serve other men with? is it really gay that you get jealous of the two people this idealised man you live with shows deference to interest in? first the woman you yourself previously showed no (outwardly sexual) interest in and who was established as a kind of a rival (wherein it was impossible for both of you to be satisfied in the same way at the same time, who invades your power animal coping mechanism sequences, and whom you later embrace as an ally and quite possibly a part of yourself) and then another guy whom you then monstrously, savagely beat after feeling an "inflamed sense of rejection" and explain ruining his body by saying you “felt like destroying something beautiful"? fellas is it gay that this idealised confident man dresses eccentrically and flamboyantly, accessorises rings and big colourful fuck-you-glasses, mesh shirts etc. going against the subdued yuppie masculinity of corporate male America, who is free in all the ways you aren't and who spews (and seduces you with) anti-social undercooked anti-capitalist rhetoric and pseudo-scientific cool guy bullshit which goes against mainstream society bro!, who uses his job/pass time as a projectionist to smuggle pornographic imagery into family films (and who represents your own violent subconscious lurking in you in the form of a penis appearing for less than a second right at the end of the film?) and who tells you that maybe neither of you need women in your lives, while you discuss your absent father figures. is it gay when he spits his own blood into the mouth of a presumed gangster telling the gangster "you don't know where i've been lou" in a time where the impact of AIDS is looming large and heavy over everyone, but is inextricably tied to gay/queer men and IV drug users?

is it gay (of the repressed, self-hating variety) to create a whole fella you can pine after and effectively beat yourself up after he picks you up to live with him and punch the lights out of another dude you recognize is beautiful because the imaginary best boy friend you created in your head, that being you, has possibly experienced homo lust which is becoming increasingly hard to suppress?

and fellas is it gay to want to be tyler and want him at the same time?

is it also gay when... [gunshot]

[lavein2drz]

ALRIGHT ITS BELOW THE CUT (this may be a silly mess but bear w/ me)

So Lance is on varsity for his high school's air riflery team, alongside Hunk. They have practices in the gym at mostly the same time and days as the girls' volleyball team (shoutout to my homie Pidge all the homies love Pidge); the gym is split in half by a bunch of bleachers that they pulled over to the middle so the two sports teams don't mess up each other's practices.

Occasionally, volleyballs will go over or past the bleachers, which are usually thrown back to volleyball's side once our shooters are done shooting the current position. Sometimes the balls go past the firing line, but they usually don't or disturb the air riflery team.

The keyword is 'usually.'

They were just getting ready to shoot their sight-in (starting) shots for prone (lying down) position. And then out of nowhere, Lance feels something whack his ass.

He turns his head, ready to see who in the world just violated his beautiful butt with apparently a freaking volleyball (okay yeah, it was an accident BUT IT STILL HURT A LITTLE), when he sees this really pretty guy?? Who in the world is he (it's Keith wow really? I didn't know)??

That is literally all I have down for this AU rn BUT I will probably come up w/ more. 😁👍

Other stuff I didn't mention:

Keith actually does baseball but he's helping out w/ vb practices (like a manager basically) because Shiro said it would be "good for him" since he's off season.

Shiro is not-so-subtly trying to get Keith to make some friends. This boy is so asocial (Shiro is shaking his head).

Allura is the vb team coach; Shiro is assistant coach (?)

There's Klance (obviously)

Ft. background Shallura (I literally love them you don't understand)

Main group (excluding The Adults™) is in junior year (I think I'll have Pidge be a grade below the others though?).

Do you guys want to hear abt my voltron high school AU of air riflery shooter!lance and (probably) volleyball player!keith? Lance gets hit in the butt w/ a volleyball (based off irl experience)

It is so dumb but ive been thinking abt it for a week & 3 days

(Yes its klance & there will be shallura)

[mothspore]

thinking about the way kaveh mourns the loss of a relationship with someone he sees every day

he has haitham in his life. he sees him every day. he LIVES with him for fucks sake, and yet his opinions of haitham are all thinly veiled guilt and mourning. he constantly talks about how close they were during school, how different their relationship was during school, etc, and then when that starts coming off a bit too sad, he starts going on about how much haitham has changed, and how he would never give him the satisfaction of thanks now

but that’s not true. it’s obvious that it’s not. he won’t thank haitham because he feels ashamed of the help he has received, he feels he is undeserving, especially after their fallout, after he said those words that were strong and hurtful enough to tear them apart completely. it’s not that he doesn’t want to thank haitham. he is afraid to.

he’s also trying to protect himself. he tries to keep haitham at an arm’s length, arguing instead of acknowledging conflicts as what they are, in order to protect himself from what he sees as an inevitable outcome of haitham kicking him out, removing him from his life. kaveh wouldn’t blame him, it was only fair. after all, that’s all he had ever known, as well.

kaveh is so used to loss. this situation with haitham is such dangerous uncharted territory for him, and that scares him. kaveh is used to losing and losing without any possibility for gain. his father passed, he will never come back. it’s not possible. his mother left for fontaine, and he stopped writing to her out of his own perceived responsibility for his father’s passing. she never reached out to him, either. he knows faranak will never return to sumeru.

what he said to haitham, he never expected for him to come back into his life. the arguments on the message boards and in annotations and such were just petty insults to him, haitham’s way of taking things out on him. he never expected haitham to offer his home up to help kaveh. the whole thing is so different that it scares him. he knows what to expect from loss, and he knows when to expect loss. but he has no idea how to cope with this. he spends all his time mourning the friendship they once had, skirting around acknowledging the help that haitham has extended to him, and waiting for the other shoe to drop, because he cannot comprehend that this could end in anything other than another loss, another hurt to add to his baggage. and he does not want to truly lose haitham again.

the only way he can ensure this for himself is to not allow the possibility of closeness again. he has flown too close to that before, felt that warmth, and been burned. he has watched those wax wings melt once before. he will not allow himself to fall again. he will not invite the sun in again, because he knows he won’t be able to resist the urge to fly too close once more, even knowing the perceived threat.

acknowledging the help haitham has provided would directly acknowledge that they are no longer enemies. it would invite some of that warmth, something that kaveh does not believe he deserves, and something he cannot afford. he does not want to lose again, so he pretends there is no chance to fix things, despite haitham’s clear attempts to prove otherwise.

[aespecte]

every1… have we SEEN the new love&deepspace ✨nightly rendezvous ✨ cards?? cause GAHDAMN what is this scandalous behaviour 😧? IM HERE FOR IT 😻😻

the most unserious 18+ word vomit below about the l&ds men bc i am completely sane 🙏 if u think it doesn’t make sense it’s bc it doesn’t LMAO just my two cents about the new card trailer 💗

minors dni below the cut. pookie, just don’t.

xavier not taking it out on the plants? oh ! so you’re gonna take it out on me 😻😻 i love angry men *twirls hair* “i won’t be easily satisfied tonight” OKAYY XAVIER HOW MANY ROUNDS ARE WE GOING??? 😼😼

rafayels forceful kissing?? i have NAWT see this man so aggressive before and erm… maybe i love it… a bit too much… scratches head… ANYWAYS did u see how he hooked mcs leg on his waist?? lowkey i feel like he’s turning into a hard dom… 😻

sylus being sylus.. im sure we are IN for a ride 😻😻 quite literally, a ride. 🙏 like OKAY KING ! call me and i’ll be right there 😼 OKAY ALSO sylus interlocking our fingers?? contrary to popular belief, he is a soft dom me thinks ! sure, he’ll do a bit of teasing, but i think he would put us first in bed 😻😻

zayne stepping out of line? i love seeing polite, respectful men turn into the kinkiest of shits in bed 🥺 and the shot of zayne literally SHOVING his books off the desk to make room for us? my fantasies are gonna have a field day tonight 😻😻

i am CONVINCED that after this mc won’t be able to walk for the next week… okay maybe more like the next MONTH

i must get all the cards 👹👹

ok lol thanks for reading love ya 😻😻

[brucie-baby]

the thing about bruce trying to kill the joker is that people always leave it at 'superman stopped him', which is only partially true. superman does stop him but only during the assembly itself. as soon as he's inhaled all the joker gas, he says, "Batman, he's all yours."

he lets bruce have him, and he doesn't step back in until it's time to pull bruce from the water. maybe this is just because it took him a while to dispose of the gas, but i've always seen it as superman essentially giving batman permission of a sort to do what he needed to do.

maybe clark didn't know what bruce would choose - whether he would lock the joker up or put him six feet under - but he trusted bruce's judgement. maybe clark was sure of bruce's intentions, that he truly believed that bruce would do the 'right' thing. or maybe clark knew that bruce was going to kill him, and he took a step back. i don't know if we're ever told, and i don't think i want to know. i just think it's very interesting.

but bruce did fully try to kill the joker. nobody could stop him, and in the end superman didn't try to. the joker had literally been shot and the helicopter was about to explode and bruce left him there to die. the comic ends with bruce yelling to find his body, but thinking, "But I know they won't. That's how things always end with the Joker and me. Unresolved."