#women party normal dresses 2017

[f0point5]

I do like simple suits as well, maybe a pop of dark colour generally. But not at the MET. This one time of the year, I'd really love to see some insane creations in men's fashion as well.

But yeah I do agree on the rest. And I have no idea how much time is given to the designers, like when is the theme revealed. But I just often get the impression they're not even trying. And I often get the vibe that most men are kind scared to do something flashy and scandalous because that would reflect bad on them? But the met to me always felt like a glorified dress up party, so you could wear whatever you wanted and I still wouldn't think that oh so Hugh Jackman is gay because he wore that to the met ya know?

Yeah that’s totally valid. I just think most of the time when I see what is considered creative in men’s fashion I have trouble appreciating it as art rather than kind of assessing how much it would irk me if my boyfriend wore that outfit. It’s like the girl version of the male gaze for me idk 😂 but I do get that considering these men are the invitees and not just the plus ones that they should be making more of an effort to stay on theme considering how women get roasted for not trying.

I feel like sometimes with designers, especially the commercial ones, there’s an element of them wanting to advertise themselves and that becomes more important than staying on theme. Like Jennie Kim, she was just a walking Alaia advert, her dress was literally just what was on the runway at fashion week. And same with the guests, especially those who aren’t “A list”. They’re concerned with avoiding the worst dressed lists etc.. I think the ones who really go all out are the designer/celebrity combinations that appreciate fashion as art form, and they’re normally the celebrities who reflect that in general. Like Zendaya has always been really into fashion and her styling has always reflected that. Same with Gwendolyn Christie.

I low-key wish they would do away with themes for the gala and just have a regular black tie dinner because the outfits have been disappointing since like 2017. Then they could a special edition photo book to coincide with the exhibition and include guests of the gala but choose their outfits for them and work with designers who understand the theme and curate outfits. It seems pointless to just keep demanding people stick to a theme when they’re clearly more interested in self promotion.

And I think the thing with men ties into that. The men invited, or at least the ones I often see on the carpet, are very often relevant or up and coming stars, eg. Josh from Challengers (forget his last name), or Jonathan Bailey. They’re just making names for themselves, they can’t really afford to be introduced to a new audience wearing a something that looks like it was thrifted from Louis XIV when they have to appeal to an often female audience. And that’s not to say anyone would genuinely be questioning their sexuality, I think most of us are more evolved than that, but you don’t get a second chance to make a first impression on your audience or even the people you meet at the gala networking. I think they probably feel the need to project as much of an “Everyman” vibe as possible. Which I do get.

As I said, I think the theme idea is nice but it’s not inspiring the outfits in the way it once was.

[snowonthebeachmp3]

October 2016

Oct 1st - Taylor takes pictures with fans in Nashville. (x)

Oct 4th - Demi Lovato criticises Taylor in their Glamour magazine cover interview. (x)

To be honest, and this will probably get me in trouble, I don’t see anybody in any sort of squad that has a normal body. It’s kind of this false image of what people should look like. And what they should be like, and it’s not real…. It’s not realistic. And I think that having a song and a video about tearing Katy Perry down, that’s not women’s empowerment.

Demi defends themself on Twitter after the interview is published, saying they're 'not apologizing for saying what everyone wants to say.' (x)

Taylor's partnership with AT&T is announced, including her Super Saturday Night pre-Super Bowl performance which will take place on Feb 4th 2017 in Houston. (x)

Joe is in London attending the IWC Schaffhausen Dinner in Honour of the BFI. (x)

Oct 5th - Taylor FaceTimes with Cara and Dakota Johnson, who are both in LA, for Dakota's birthday. (x)

Oct 9th - Paul Sidoti (Taylor's guitarist) posts a photo of guitars in a rehearsal studio with the caption, 'Back in the saddle again.. #formula1' (x)

Oct 11th - Cara is seen leaving Cornelia Street. (x)

Taylor, Cara, Dakota and Suki Waterhouse meet at the Waverly Inn in the West Village at around 11pm. (x)

Oct 12th - Taylor attends a private Kings of Leon concert at Le Poisson Rouge in New York, along with Lorde, Lily Aldridge, Lily Donaldson, Cara, Suki, Martha, Dakota, Zoë Kravitz and Naomi Campbell. (x) They then go to the Bowery Hotel for the afterparty. (x)

The group is then papped leaving the Bowery Hotel and arriving at the Lovers of Today bar. Joe arrives at Lovers of Today with Lily D, Martha, and Martha's boyfriend Jason McDonald, while Taylor, Dakota, Cara and Zoë arrive moments later. (x) Given that Joe has a connection to the lead singer Caleb Followill (via his Billy Lynn costar Garrett), and arrived at the bar with others who were definitely at the concert and afterparty, it seems almost certain that he was at those events too. No media picks up on his presence at the time.

Oct 13th - Taylor goes out for dinner with Dakota and Cara in New York. (x) She then attends an Eliot Sumner concert at the Bowery Ballroom (not to be confused with the Bowery Hotel), along with Karlie, Suki, Lily D, Dakota, Cara, Zoë and Serena Williams. (x)

Taylor is wearing a temporary golden tattoo on her neck.

Oct 14th - Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk premieres at the New York Film Festival. (x) Joe walks the red carpet and does some promo. (x)

Eliotte, Kamilah and Melanie, three of Taylor's backup singers, are hanging out and probably rehearsing for the upcoming concert at F1. (x)

Oct 15th - Joe does some more promo with the rest of the Billy Lynn cast in New York. (x)

Taylor is in LA for a few days between the 13th and 16th recording Delicate (her golden neck tattoo is visible). (x)

Oct 16th - Lily D and Suki post videos of Olivia to their social media from Cornelia Street. (x) (x)

Oct 17th - Cara is seen leaving Cornelia Street. (x)

Oct 18th - Taylor is in rehearsals in Nashville for her upcoming F1 concert. Her golden neck tattoo is gone. (x) (x)

Oct 20th - Little Big Town releases Better Man as the lead single from their eighth studio album. (x) (The song was written by Taylor but this fact is not publicised upon the song's initial release.)

Oct 21st - Taylor posts an Instagram story from her bed. She has a cold and Meredith is making a racket and keeping her awake ahead of her concert in Texas the next day. (x)

Oct 22nd - Taylor files a counter-suit against radio DJ David Mueller, who is suing her because he lost his job after groping her at a 2013 meet and greet. By counter-suing him for assault and battery, she hopes to 'serve as an example to other women who may resist publicly reliving similar outrageous and humiliating acts.' (x)

Taylor performs her only concert of 2016 at the US F1 Grand Prix in Austin, Texas (saving the US Grand Prix from going bust in the process). She plays TIWYCF on piano, her first time performing the song live. (x) She has a cold and has to pause the show to blow her nose. (x) (While promoting Billy Lynn in Taiwan a few weeks later, Joe also has a cold.)

Oct 23rd - Taylor goes to Drake's 30th birthday party at Delilah restaurant in LA. Karlie, Zoë, Jari Haile, Kennedy Rayé, Halston Sage and the Haim sisters are there, as well as John Mayer and Katy Perry. (x) Taylor and Halston both have stick-on gold star tattoos on their chests. (x)

Oct 24th - Taylor commemorates the tenth anniversary of her first album with an Instagram post. (x)

Given that Taylor does not leave LA until the 28th but is not papped anywhere, it is possible that she uses her time there to work on I Did Something Bad at Conway Studios with Max and Shellback. (x) The Making Of clips for the song show that it was recorded sometime after Taylor's haircut on the 24th Sep. (Don't Blame Me was not recorded until some point after December 13th, as she wears the J necklace in the Making Of clips and we know that was a 27th birthday present. (x)) However, it isn't possible to precisely date these clips.

Oct 25th - Katy Perry attends Kanye's concert in LA and posts a video on her Instagram story dancing along to the Famous lyric about Taylor. (x)

Oct 27th - There are rumours that Taylor and Drake are dating, following her appearance at his birthday party, but these are shut down, presumably by Tree. (x) (x)

Oct 28th - Calvin drops the music video for My Way. Some think it contains several references to Taylor. (x)

Karlie wishes Drake a belated happy birthday by posting an Instagram picture of herself and Taylor at his party. (x)

In the evening Taylor's plane goes from LA to NYC, and then from NYC to London. However, she stays completely under the radar and is not spotted anywhere in London. (x) At the time some people theorise that this means she's seeing Tom again, but in hindsight she almost certainly went to see Joe.

Oct 31st - Taylor's plane returns to the US from London. (x)

Taylor has a small Halloween party at her Cornelia Street townhouse. Guests include Gigi, Martha, Lily D, Camila, Kennedy Rayé and Emmie Gundler. Taylor dresses up as Deadpool and wears Ryan Reynolds' actual costume from the movie. (x)

Camila talks about the party a year later on Jimmy Fallon and mentions that at one point 'two attractive guys' arrived, prompting Camila to run to the bathroom and change out of her grandma costume. (x) (x) Apparently one of the guys was dressed as Spiderman. (x) If so that was probably Joe, since that's his favourite superhero. (x) Also probably a couples' costume, since Deadpool and Spiderman have a bromance going on in the comics. However, I couldn't find any original interviews where Camila mentions a Spiderman being at the party (I know she mentioned the party in some radio interviews which have since disappeared from the internet so maybe it was one of them).

Anyways, it's very likely that the guys attending what was otherwise a girl's night/Kennedy Rayé's birthday were Joe and a friend, especially since the next day Taylor's private jet made a seemingly random round trip to London and back. Presumably this trip was to drop Joe (and possibly his friend) back in London, in time for Joe to fly from the UK to Taiwan and China for Billy Lynn promo. (x) (x)

Intro // February // March // April // May // June // July // August // September // October // November

[emma-what-son]

How Sir Philip's son cast a spell on Emma Watson: The super-woke Harry Potter star and the playboy son of the disgraced Topshop tycoon - it's hard to think of a more unlikely romance, writes ALISON BOSHOFF

One can almost see her eyebrows raised in quizzical disdain. Hermione Granger would surely disapprove.

Pictures emerged this week of Emma Watson, the serious-minded Harry Potter actress and eco-warrior, hopping out of Sir Philip Green’s family helicopter in Battersea, South London. Curious, some would think, given Emma’s long-standing war against fast fashion, that she would accept a lift from the fallen King of the High Street.

More curious still, however, is that Emma, 31, has apparently been enchanted by Brandon Green, Sir Philip’s 28-year-old son, whose longest relationship to date seems to have been with a Belarusian bikini model. Could there be a more unlikely romance?

Aside from both being awash with money —Brandon is an heir to a £2 billion fortune, while Emma is said to be worth about £59 million —they appear to have almost nothing in common. Yet according to a friend, a certain magic is in the air.

‘Brandon has been wooing Emma,’ says one source. Another says: ‘They are an item, although she hasn’t met the family yet.’

Emma, who once mused about being ‘self-partnered’, has certainly had more suitors than her single status would have you believe.

At 17, an early boyfriend was rugby player Tom Ducker, but her most serious romance seems to have been with another rugby player — and fellow Oxford student — Matt Janney, with whom she broke up in 2015.

Then there was another Oxford student, Will Adamowicz. The relationship lasted from 2011 to 2013.

She was then seen out and about with actor/producer Roberto Aguire, whom she first met in 2005 on the set of Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire. She also seems to have a particularly weak spot for young tech millionaires, as she has dated at least three of them, most significantly U.S. entrepreneur William ‘Mack’ Knight, whom she split from in late 2017 following a two-year romance.

Then came a six-month love affair with handsome Glee actor Chord Overstreet. They broke up during the summer of 2018.

She was then spotted sharing cocktails with tech CEO Brendan Wallace, a New Yorker, now 38, who is co-founder of a venture capital fund. By summer 2019 she was rumoured to have moved on to another tech millionaire, Brendan Iribe, CEO of Oculus.

She most recently split from her boyfriend of two years, businessman Leo Robinton.

It’s a longer list of amours than you might expect for someone who claims to be ‘self-partnered’, but then Emma is a woman who solemnly examines her life.

‘The boyfriends or partners I’ve had have generally made me feel really cherished. They have built me up,’ she said.

Quite how Brandon — who featured in Tatler’s ‘most eligible’ list in 2014 and was once caught patting Kate Moss’s bottom — fits into Emma’s orbit of admirers, remains to be seen. Although, like Emma’s other admirers, he does have a job running a tech investments company.

So who is this handsome young man — and what does Emma see in him?

Born in 1992, he was raised in Monte Carlo with big sister Chloe. His mother, Tina, is resident in the tax haven and was the ultimate owner of the Arcadia group, which went into administration last year. He went to the principality of Monaco’s International School.

To say his was a gilded upbringing would be an understatement. A source in Monaco says: ‘All the time he was growing up, the Greens would never fly commercial, always in their private jet.

‘They have a private chauffeur and in the family penthouse at the Roccabella building in Monaco there are uniformed maids standing to attention in every room just in case someone needs something. That’s the lifestyle Brandon was born into and has always thought was completely normal.’

He and Chloe have the use of the 109ft yacht Lionchase — Sir Phil has the 295ft Lionheart —which is moored in Monaco in the winter and cruises around the Med all summer.

I’m informed that his mum will pick up ‘seven-figure’ boat bills for the pair of them at the end of the season without blanching.

Brandon’s 2005 Bar Mitzvah caused a stir. It was held at the Grand-Hotel du Cap-Ferrat, with entertainment provided by Beyonce, Destiny’s Child and Italian tenor Andrea Bocelli. There were 300 guests over three days, all hosted by Sir Phil, who was then the boss of Topshop, BHS and Dorothy Perkins, all part of the Arcadia group.

When he was younger, Brandon seemed to be happy to join Chloe in a celebrity-packed party lifestyle. Locals say he was ‘practically living in Monaco’s Sass Café and partying until dawn every morning with a bevy of models’ in his 20s.

Kate Moss — a friend of his father — spent much of her 2011 honeymoon break with Jamie Hince on board his yacht and they got on famously. In 2013 he was spotted playfully groping Moss’s bikini-clad bottom while on holiday in St Barth’s. At the time he was 21.

When she was 21, Emma Watson had been famous for a decade and had just finished making the Potter films.

While Brandon found life one long, joyful party, she was struggling introspectively with having money and acclaim. As she recently said: ‘I’ve often thought, I’m so wrong for this job because I’m too serious.’

She felt physically sick when she found out how much money she had earned from the Potter films, and considered not renewing her contract to complete them.

Following stellar A-levels, she took an English degree at Brown University in Rhode Island — over five years, due to disruption from filming.

Brandon Green doesn’t have a degree. There was some idea that he might buck the family trend and go to university, but Sir Phil told an interviewer at the time: ‘It’s up for discussion,’ and evidently it was decided that was not the right path.

Instead, he spent years learning the ropes of the fashion business with Sir Philip and working for Arcadia.

As the BHS scandal raged in 2016 — after Sir Philip sold the company to a bankrupt, with a hole in its pensions provisions — and the company went bust, Brandon was sent to host a table at the Met Gala Ball in New York in his father’s place.

For three years, he was also a regular at the Topshop show at London Fashion Week, sitting with model Jourdan Dunn and chatting to Vogue editor-in-chief Anna Wintour.

He began to go to Cannes, again as part of Topshop’s presence at the film festival, and to attend the Amfar charity gala on the arm of girlfriend Maryna Linchuk, a Victoria’s Secret model who towered over him.

But when Chloe became more involved in the family business and started designing shoes, Brandon stepped back from the spotlight.

They are a close family, all the more so since the woes that beset the Arcadia Group and Sir Philip before it collapsed. In fact, this seems to have acted as a wake-up call for Brandon.

A source said: ‘Once Philip fell from grace so badly, all the A-list celebrities and many of the world’s elite dropped the Green family completely. It really shook them up.

‘There was a party in Monaco that a family friend threw for them in the middle of the BHS pensions scandal. Brandon looked around aghast and said to Tina, “We don’t know anyone here!”

‘They felt the world hated them. Philip would fill his days doing laps of Monaco on foot with his bodyguard and personal trainer. Tina would busy herself in her art gallery or with her interior design business. There were a lot of tears; it was an awful atmosphere for the staff and for the family.

‘Brandon could see how transient popularity is and how big A-list stars had been using them for free holidays on their yachts for years. The whole experience sparked a “woke-over” in Brandon.

‘He got very interested in biodiversity and saving the oceans. He does a lot of charity and advocacy work with both Monaco’s Prince Albert’s Foundation and Princess Charlene’s Foundation. He is a trained deep-sea diver, he is very into fitness and gets involved with galas and charities that help the planet. He does frequent beach clean-ups and whatever he can to help.

‘It’s all very low-key, as he doesn’t want to be seen to be doing charity work for PR. But he’s been getting Tina to donate a hefty amount of money to charities that help save the planet too, saying they should do some good with their huge fortune.’

A second source says it is now Brandon, rather than Chloe, who is the apple of Tina’s eye, and he who is seen as the one who will eventually turn the family’s public reputation around.

A friend says: ‘He is very disciplined, intelligent and keen on study. He reads a lot, he travels a lot. He’s polite and well-mannered. Whatever he does, he embraces it fully. His parents are proud of him.’

His hobbies include skiing, at which he excels. He trains almost daily and took part in a gruelling cycling and swimming charity event last year for Princess Charlene of Monaco’s charity, going from Corsica to Monaco.

The friend adds: ‘He eats right and doesn’t drink or party — he is a very nice young man.’

How Brandon came to meet Emma, whose woke credentials may prove challenging for his family, is somewhat unclear, although it is believed his newfound interest in charitable ventures may have steered him her way.

Last year Miss Watson joined the sustainability committee at Kering, the owner of top fashion brands such as Gucci. She was labelled ‘Hollywood’s queen of ethical dressing’ by Vogue.

She has been taking a break from acting after appearing in the 2019 film Little Women but remains an active advocate for ‘race and gender justice’ via various charities. In 2014 she became a UN Women Goodwill ambassador, and she also ran a feminist book club, Our Shared Shelf, on Twitter.

She loves writing poetry, jigsaws, cats and nights in.

Her first purchase with the Potter millions was a ‘brick-like’ Toyota Prius. She said: ‘It’s sensible and boring, like me.’

Not that Emma is as staid as she says. In conversation with Gloria Steinem at an event in London in 2016, she revealed that she subscribes to a sex education website called OMGyes.

It’s a far remove from the days when she was cast in the Harry Potter films at nine years old, having been found via the theatre club she attended. She only completed filming the last Potter when she was 20, in June 2010.

Sources who knew her in the Potter days say her father Chris’s influence was paramount, even though she lived with her mother in Oxford.

The experience of growing up on Potter was so constricting and stressful, when the cast and crew held a ‘wrap party’ at Harry’s Bar after the final set of reshoots in 2010, she didn’t attend.

She said in 2017: ‘It’s something I’ve really wrestled with. I’ve gone back and quizzed my parents. When I was younger, I just did it. I just acted, it was just there.

‘I was finding this fame thing was getting to a point of no return. I sensed that if this was something I was ever going to step away from, it was now or never.’

Post-Potter, her films have been generally low-key. It is said she turned down the La La Land role that brought Emma Stone an Oscar.

Her £3 million London home was selected after she viewed it over Skype, because she can come and go unobserved.

That’s not to say her life is in any way normal: her social circle includes fashion figures such as Antoine Arnault of the LVMH dynasty, she has been the face of Lancome perfume and launched a collection with the ethical fashion label People Tree.

The question now is, will Emma finally find lasting love with a most unlikely Green?

[newstfionline]

Monday, January 11, 2021

The workers hit hardest during Covid-19’s first wave are getting pummeled again (Yahoo Finance) Since the beginning of the pandemic, one group of workers has been hurt far more than others: those working in the service industries, specifically in leisure and hospitality jobs. And in December after some progress, that industry lost jobs once again. “The most recent surge in coronavirus cases is once again battering the US labor market,” Indeed’s economic research director Nick Bunker wrote in a note. “The economic fallout from this wave of cases is hitting the industries and workers pummeled hardest by the initial damage before they fully bounced back from that first hit.” The latest hit isn’t as bad as the spring, as vaccines are rolling out and certain measures are in place, but restaurants, bars, and other jobs that depend on people interacting still cannot do business in a pandemic environment.

Squelched by Twitter, Trump seeks new online megaphone (AP) One Twitter wag joked about lights flickering on and off at the White House being Donald Trump signaling to his followers in Morse code after Twitter and Facebook squelched the president for inciting rebellion. Though deprived of his big online megaphones, Trump does have alternative options of much smaller reach. The far right-friendly Parler may be the leading candidate, though Google and Apple have both removed it from their app stores and Amazon decided to boot it off its web hosting service. Trump may launch his own platform. But that won’t happen overnight, and free speech experts anticipate growing pressure on all social media platforms to curb incendiary speech as Americans take stock of Wednesday’s violent takeover of the U.S. Capitol. Facebook and Instagram have suspended Trump at least until Inauguration Day. Twitch and Snapchat also have disabled Trump’s accounts, while Shopify took down online stores affiliated with the president and Reddit removed a Trump subgroup. Twitter also banned Trump loyalists including former national security advisor Michael Flynn in a sweeping purge of accounts promoting the QAnon conspiracy theory and the Capitol insurrection. Some had hundreds of thousands of followers.

Navy’s Priciest Carrier Ever Struggles to Get Jets On, Off Deck (Bloomberg) Aircraft takeoff and landing systems on the USS Gerald R. Ford remain unreliable and break down too often more than three years after the $13.2 billion carrier was delivered, according to the Pentagon’s top tester. The latest assessment of the costliest warship ever built “remains consistent” with previous years, director of testing Robert Behler said in his new summary of the program obtained by Bloomberg News before its release in an annual report. The Ford’s new systems—which propel planes off the deck and into the sky and then snag them on landing—are crucial to justifying the expense of what’s now a four-vessel, $57 billion program intended to replace the current Nimitz class of aircraft carriers. The continuing reliability woes with the carrier systems built by General Atomics of San Diego are separate from another continuing challenge: the installation and certification of elevators needed to lift munitions from below deck. As of November, six of 11 “advanced weapons elevators” that should have been installed when the ship was delivered in May 2017 are now operational.

In Central America, tensions rise as soldiers aim to stop migrants (Reuters) Guatemalan and Honduran soldiers will be deployed to prevent new U.S.-bound migrant caravans from advancing, military officials said, amid growing desperation among those seeking to cross and signs that some groups will depart later this month. Two devastating hurricanes late last year along with severe economic fallout from the coronavirus pandemic have pushed millions of people in the already-poor region closer to hunger, leading to a steady rise in U.S.-bound migration through Mexico. In online forums, many Honduras have indicated they plan to leave next weekend in a new caravan, which has caught the attention of U.S. officials who have called on the region’s governments to stop them. Many migrants in recent years have chosen to travel by caravan because being part of a large group offers protection from criminals who might prey on them, even though traveling alone is often faster.

Johnson under fire as UK again faces onslaught of COVID-19 (AP) The crisis facing Britain this winter is depressingly familiar: Stay-at-home orders and empty streets. Hospitals overflowing. A daily toll of many hundreds of coronavirus deaths. The U.K. is the epicenter of Europe’s COVID-19 outbreak once more, and Prime Minister Boris Johnson’s Conservative government is facing questions, and anger, as people demand to know how the country has ended up here—again. Many countries are enduring new waves of the virus, but Britain’s is among the worst, and it comes after a horrendous 2020. More than 3 million people in the U.K. have tested positive for the coronavirus and 81,000 have died—30,000 in just the last 30 days. The economy has shrunk by 8%, more than 800,000 jobs have been lost and hundreds of thousands more furloughed workers are in limbo. Even with the new lockdown, London Mayor Sadiq Khan said Friday that the situation in the capital was “critical,” with one in every 30 people infected. “The stark reality is that we will run out of beds for patients in the next couple of weeks unless the spread of the virus slows down drastically,” he said.

In the Cold and Rain, India’s Farmers Press Their Stand Against Modi (NYT) Under a rain-slick tarpaulin, half a dozen elderly women bake roti on a wood-fired griddle—flattening dough, flipping browned bread from dawn until the sun retreats into Delhi’s evening smoke. Anyone who walks in gets served rice and cooked vegetables and, to wash it down, a cumin-flavored yogurt drink. Across the road, Jagjeet Singh, a burly man with a large fanny pack and a light purple turban, churns a hefty pot of milk coffee from 5 a.m. to 5 p.m. The scenes stretching for miles around the Indian capital don’t come from a fair. They make up one of the largest sustained protests the country has seen in decades, persisting through steady rains and dozens of deaths that farmers and the Indian media have attributed to the weather, illness or suicide. For six weeks now, tens of thousands of farmers have choked the city’s four main entry points. They are challenging Prime Minister Narendra Modi, who has crushed all other opposition and stands as the country’s dominant political force, over his effort to reshape how farming in India has been done for decades. “They sold everything else. Only the farmers are left,” said 18-year old Ajay Veer Singh, who has been at the protest with his 67-year-old grandfather since it began in November. “Now they want to sell the farmers to their corporate friends too.”

China sees growing outbreak south of Beijing (AP) More than 360 people have tested positive in a growing coronavirus outbreak south of Beijing in neighboring Hebei province. The outbreak has raised particular concern because of Hebei’s proximity to the nation’s capital. Travel between the two has been restricted, with workers from Hebei having to show proof of employment in Beijing to enter the city. Almost all of the cases are in Shijuazhuang, the provincial capital, which is about 260 kilometers (160 miles) southwest of Beijing. A handful have also been found in Xingtai city, 110 kilometers (68 miles) farther south. Both cities have conducted mass testing of millions of residents, suspended public transportation and restricted residents to their communities or villages for one week.

Pompeo voids restrictions on diplomatic contacts with Taiwan (AP) Secretary of State Mike Pompeo announced Saturday that the State Department is voiding longstanding restrictions on how U.S. diplomats and others have contact with their counterparts in Taiwan, another move that is expected to upset China as the Trump administration winds to an end. The Trump administration has sought to strengthen bilateral relations with Taiwan. It announced Thursday that U.N Ambassador Kelly Craft would go to Taiwan, a move that sparked sharp criticism from Beijing and a warning that the U.S. would pay a heavy price. In August, Health and Human Services Secretary Alex Azar became the first Cabinet member to visit Taiwan since 2014. Pompeo said that the State Department has created complex restrictions when it comes to contacts between the two parties. He said those actions were taken to appease the Communist regime in Beijing. “No more,” Pompeo declared in a statement. “Today I am announcing that I am lifting all of these self-imposed restrictions.” The Chinese government maintains that mainland China and Taiwan are parts of “one China.” China has been stepping up its threats to bring the self-governing island under its control by military force with frequent war games and aerial patrols. It has been using its diplomatic clout to stop Taiwan from joining any organizations that require statehood for membership.

Japanese pray for end to pandemic in annual ice bath ritual at Tokyo shrine (Reuters) Men wearing traditional loin clothes and women dressed in white robes clapped and chanted before going into an ice water bath during a Shinto ritual at a Tokyo shrine on Sunday to purify the soul and pray for the end of the COVID-19 pandemic. Only a dozen people took part in the annual event at Teppou-zu Inari Shrine, scaled down this year due to the health crisis, compared to over a hundred in early 2020. After doing warming-up exercises and chanting under a clear sky with outside temperatures at 5.1 degree Celsius (41.18 Fahrenheit), the nine male and three female participants went into a bath filled with cold water and large ice blocks. Fewer participants at the Shinto ritual made the water extra cold, participant Naoaki Yamaguchi told Reuters. “Normally we have more participants and it makes the water temperature a little bit warmer. But this year, there were just twelve people, so it (the cold) was crazy,” the 47-year-old said.

Indonesian divers find parts of plane wreckage in Java Sea (AP) Indonesian divers on Sunday located parts of the wreckage of a Boeing 737-500 at a depth of 23 meters (75 feet) in the Java Sea, a day after the aircraft with 62 people onboard crashed shortly after takeoff from Jakarta. Earlier, rescuers pulled out body parts, pieces of clothing and scraps of metal from the surface. It’s still unclear what caused the crash. There was no sign of survivors. Fishermen in the area between Lancang and Laki islands, part of an archipelago around Thousand Islands north of Jakarta’s coast, reported hearing an explosion around 2:30 p.m. Saturday.

At a Yemen hospital wracked by U.S. funding cuts, children are dying of hunger (Washington Post) Her infant son, weakened by hunger, needed a better-equipped hospital in the capital, Sanaa, roughly 30 miles away. But Hanan Saleh could no longer afford even the $30 taxi fare. Before, she depended on a Western aid organization, Save the Children, for funds, drawn from money donated by the United States, to cover the travel costs, said employees of the organization and hospital officials. But last year, the United States slashed its funding to United Nations groups and others such as Save the Children. So Saleh had to raise money to treat her son, Mohammed, in Sanaa until those funds ran out, too. Her last option was a small hospital in this northern Yemen market town, a 15-minute walk from their home. The staff tried to build up his skeletal, malnourished 9-month-old body. “He died two months ago,” Saleh recalled in November, breaking down in tears. Aid cuts by the Trump administration and other Western countries, intended to prevent Yemen’s Houthi rebels from diverting or blocking funds, are worsening the country’s humanitarian crisis, already considered the most severe in the world. Last year’s pledges totaling $1.61 billion were less than half of 2019’s funding, and hundreds of millions of dollars committed by donors have not yet been paid, according to the U.N.’s humanitarian office for Yemen. At least 15 of the U.N.’s 41 major programs have been scaled back or closed, and additional programs could shutter in the months to come, if more funds are not received, U.N. officials say.

The Tiny Satellites That Will Connect Cows, Cars and Shipping Containers to the Internet (WSJ) Scientists who track the health of Adélie penguins on the ice-covered wastes of Antarctica are managing their cameras from thousands of miles away—via tiny satellites orbiting above our heads. Energy companies are exploring using the same technology for monitoring hard-to-reach wind farms; logistics companies for tracking shipping containers; and agribusiness companies for minding cattle. It even helped National Geographic track a discarded plastic bottle from Bangladesh to the Indian Ocean. In the near future, it isn’t unreasonable to imagine this evolving satellite technology could put a distress beacon in every automobile, allow remote monitoring of wildlife in any environment on earth, and track your Amazon shipment—not just when it’s on a truck, but backward, all the way to the factory that produced it. And it could be done at a fraction of the cost of earlier satellite tracking systems. These novel networks of nanosats—aka cubesats—are a result of a number of factors. First, the satellites themselves are smaller, cheaper and more capable than ever. Just as important, there’s the rollout and adoption of new long-distance, low-power wireless communication standards that can work just as well in outer space as they do on the ground. In the next year, hundreds of satellites from more than a dozen companies are set to launch.

[kentonramsey]

How We Fell Back In Love With The Classic Canvas Shoe

Lockdown may have brought new meaning to the concept of comfort dressing but we have 2017 to thank for putting functionality first. The year that killed the heel – not just in the office but for weddings and parties, too – made trainers in their many guises the acceptable footwear for any and all occasions, no matter how formal. Thanks to Balenciaga’s volcanic Triple S, chunky commuter trainers have reigned supreme ever since but there’s change in the air – or rather, on the ground. 2020 has made way for a more classic style of kicks, free of bells and whistles: the rubber-soled, lace-up canvas shoe.

Commonly referred to as the plimsoll, the canvas shoe has been around since self-taught chemist Charles Goodyear invented vulcanised rubber back in 1839. However, from the 1980s onwards the simple style fell by the wayside in favour of flashier, high-tech alternatives. As sportswear giants like adidas, Puma and Nike competed for fan loyalty via cult collectables and game-changing alliances – from Run-DMC and Michael Jordan to Kanye West, there’s no underestimating the power of an influential endorsement in solidifying a trainer’s status – the unassuming plimsoll was relegated to PE lessons and mums on the go. 

Now, though, born out of lockdown’s less-is-more approach to dressing, the simplicity of a heritage canvas and rubber shoe is far more appealing than its ostentatious counterparts. Whether referencing Normal People’s Marianne in a black dress and white canvas pumps or every outing made by Emily Ratajkowski since lockdown began, our entire Instagram feed has been donning a more streamlined sneaker of late. 

Though hardly the kicks you’d reach for to head out for a run or hit the tennis courts, the plimsoll’s legacy can be traced back to the 1920s, when the relationship between sportswear and fashion was forged. In 1916 Keds launched its first pair of plimsolls: the Champion, a simple lace-up, low-rise canvas shoe, prompted the coining of the term ‘sneakers’ thanks to its quiet – thus sneaky – rubber sole. “As lifestyles began to change and women were encouraged to be more active and independent, the elaborate dressing of previous decades began to fade away in favour of comfortable cuts and fabrics that moved and breathed,” explains Holly Curtis, vice president of product at Keds. “This is also when sneakers really entered the space and became everyday items in a woman’s wardrobe. This relationship continued to ebb and flow until the more recent rise of athleisure fully melded the two.” 

The all-American brand sent its female customers a clear message: shoes should be practical, provide run-around-friendly comfort and transcend the trappings of suffocating femininity represented by heels. Fast-forward to the ‘50s and ‘60s and Keds were endorsed by Hollywood stars looking to prove they were more than delicate dolls of the silver screen. From Katharine Hepburn to Marilyn Monroe, the Champion was worn with high-waisted denim (another sartorial symbol of rebellion at the time), blouses tied at the waist and ringer tees. In 1969 Yoko Ono married John Lennon in a white skirt and top, knee-high socks and a pair of Keds, confounding expectations of what a woman should wear on her wedding day. Meanwhile Jackie Onassis was often spotted cycling around New York City in her monochromatic preppy uniform of white jeans, black turtleneck and Keds. In the ‘80s and ‘90s the brand was embraced on TV and in film by influential girl-next-door characters from Saved by the Bell’s Kelly Kapowski and Dirty Dancing’s Frances “Baby” Houseman to Friends’ Rachel Green. All three favoured tank tops, dungarees and denim cut-offs with their plimsolls, a look that’s come full circle and can be seen on Instagram and Depop’s coolest today. 

The world’s most-worn canvas shoe, the Converse All Star, also originated in sport. Founded in 1908, the brand initially made galoshes and other work-related rubber shoes but by 1917 the first iteration of the style had been created, in brown canvas with a black rubber trim. It was the first mass-produced basketball shoe in the United States but didn’t really take off until 1921, when Charles H. Taylor, a player for Ohio’s Akron Firestone Non-Skids, took a shine to the sneaker and travelled across the country with Converse, promoting the All Star as the only shoe worth playing in. His marketing campaign was such a success that in 1932 the brand added Chuck’s name to the ankle patch. In 1936 Converse issued a white pair with a patriotic red and blue trim especially for the Berlin Olympics and in 1949 the monochrome high top we know today was launched. 

While the mass popularity of Converse never really faltered, the launch of corporations like Nike, adidas and Puma – and high-tech innovations like air pockets, springs and pumps – diluted the brand’s influence in the athletic footwear market. Eventually, All Stars evolved from court-ready sports staple to become the footwear of choice for countercultural youths. As its appeal switched from functionality to fashion, Converse became a leisurewear brand and in the ‘80s and ‘90s it conquered the music industry, just as it had the sports arena decades earlier. Loved by everyone from The Clash to Kurt Cobain, no gig venue in the world has gone untouched by a pair of Chucks; there’s even an extensive database of musicians who have worn the classic kicks, spanning Green Day, Ariana Grande and George Harrison. 

Converse may have dominated the music scene but it was Vans to which skaters pledged their allegiance. From the brand’s birth in 1966, California’s boarders made Vans’ #44 deck shoe – now known as the Authentic – their preferred kicks thanks to the style’s sticky gripped sole. The Era style was introduced in ‘76, with padded features for ankle support, and one year later the Old Skool debuted the “jazz stripe”, the hallmark wave on the side of the shoe. Sean Penn’s Jeff Spicoli donned Vans’ checkerboard slip-ons in Cameron Crowe’s classic teen movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High, solidifying the brand as the footwear of laid-back stoners and slackers the world over. In 2001, Vans helped director Stacy Peralta, former member of the pioneering ‘70s Zephyr skateboard team, to produce the definitive skate documentary, Dogtown and Z-Boys. 

Now, of course, you don’t have to know your grind from your kickflip to sport a pair of Vans, nor are you expected to wear drainpipe jeans and a cropped leather jacket on stage before a beer-slinging crowd to qualify for a pair of All Stars. The canvas shoe has transcended its subcultural history thanks to smart marketing, contemporary celebrity endorsements and designer collaborations. Shoes that once dressed the outcasts of the underground have now been embraced by the masses for their comfort. For Mira Bourdon, senior global category manager of women’s classics footwear at Vans, the canvas shoe’s ubiquitous appeal lies in its status as a “blank canvas for creative expression”. This may not always be a good thing – we’ll leave the Harry Potter Golden Snitch Old Skools to the tweens – but it can work: just see Converse x Comme des Garçons, which has turned heart-emblazoned Chucks into the unofficial uniform of minimalist-leaning architects and artists alike.

Superga, too, has nailed the art of collaboration in its hook-up with Alexa Chung. The brand’s 2490 COTU style – a low-cut, six-eye lace-up canvas shoe – has always been a bestseller but by aligning with the closest thing we have to Jane Birkin (who can be found on ’60s and ’70s Pinterest boards wearing her white plimsolls with flared jeans and cotton blouses, shift dresses and basket bags, and crochet crop tops and denim cut-offs) Superga infused its retro legacy with some contemporary cool. Understanding that, in contrast to the hyped-up, high-tech trainer, the appeal of the canvas shoe lies in its simplicity, the ongoing collaboration focuses on new colourways and fabrics rather than graphic prints and patterns or pumped-up soles.

The real contenders for our feet in 2020 are lesser known and eco-conscious. Stocked at independent boutiques like TOAST, Couverture & The Garbstore and Goodhood, Novesta has enjoyed a resurgence in recent years. The Slovakian brand, founded in 1939, uses natural rubber and 100% cotton and linen to make its products, the jewel in the crown of which is the ultra-comfy Star Master with its unmistakable chunky sole (complete with vulcanisation marks) and deep toe. They look just as great with a wide-legged trouser and cropped tee as they do with a floral midi dress.

Elsewhere, British brand Good News, founded in 2016, has surely had a heavy hand in the return to the canvas shoe’s simple silhouette. “The breathable durability of a canvas sneaker provides an everyday staple that never goes out of fashion,” cofounder Nia Jones tells me. “The new sustainable technologies being developed in this area means the canvas shoe will be forever relevant.” Each season, Good News scrutinises its production and supply chain to improve its sustainability credentials: every pair of shoes has recycled rubber soles, organic cotton and weave uppers, and recycled eco-lite footbeds; its lace tips are biodegradable and the brand has offset its carbon footprint, making it a carbon-neutral company. 

Trainers have long since replaced heels as the favoured wear-anywhere footwear but the genderless, breathable, comfortable and streamlined canvas shoe feels more fitting for the quieter, more pared-back, practical life of lockdown. With no one around to admire our flashy kicks, a nondescript plimsoll feels all the more purposeful. Now more than ever we’re considering our wardrobes with a future-looking eye, asking what will age well, be worn until the seams are torn, and truly last. As fashion history has proved, the timeless rubber and canvas shoe endures, no matter how you style it.

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How We Fell Back In Love With The Classic Canvas Shoe published first on https://mariakistler.tumblr.com/

[kickassviv]

Pernille Harder: "I first dared to say that I would be the best in the world when I got away from Denmark"

Danish national team leader Pernille Harder was only a fan of the women's soccer World Cup. However, due to her high profile on and off the field, she left her mark on the tournament. Berlingske has met her for a conversation about love, homophobia, the fight for equality and the ambition to become the best in the world. And about two parties that got the national team leader out of the chair.

Credit to @magdaerikssons for the article and disclaimer, google translate was used to translate into English.

Is there a Danish "Liebes-Spionin", a love spy who helps the Swedish women's team against a victory?

That's how the German newspaper "Bild" speculated about the Danish national team leader and Wolfsburg player Pernille Harder in the heat during the just over the World Cup in women's football in France.

The newspaper had noted that the "Bundesliga's best player with a good knowledge of Germany" was constantly found among the Swedish players because of the girlfriend and defender Magdalena Eriksson. Eriksson plays daily for the London club Chelsea.

Two days before Berlingske meets Harder in the French city of Rennes, a picture of her and her boyfriend, both wearing Swedish national team jerseys, went viral on social media, not least in South America:

“It's a little crazy. I've gained 10,000 new followers on Instagram and I haven't even posted the picture myself. Many are from South America. I don't know what it is about homophobia down there, but it obviously means a lot of two female soccer players openly dare to show their love, ”says Harder, who also notes that she has lost no followers because of the picture.

It's 38 degrees hot, and the blue-and-yellow fans are trying to hide in the shade of bars and cafes before heading out to the stadium where the double world champion Germany, with some of Harder's teammates, waits.

Commander's Tour de France as the roe Instead of just being upset that it missed out on Denmark's participation, Harder has been taken to the World Cup as a Swedish roigan. The qualification smoked on the floor, among other things, as Denmark, due to a conflict between the national team and DBU, could not place teams against Sweden in the fall of 2017 and therefore lost 3-0 at the desk.

Now, instead, she is undertaking her own personal Tour de France in cities such as Nice, Paris, Rennes and Lyon. To support her girlfriend, who otherwise beat Denmark in the World Cup qualification, and to become smarter in her sport:

“It gives me another perspective to be here as a fan. I sense what the football gives off the field to all the fans. When you play a final round, you don't think so much about it off the field. But now I realize how big it all has become with fan march, etc., and that makes me want to put even more heart into it on the track in the future, "says the 26-year-old star, while the Swedish fans agree a new kind of song.

Harder and Eriksson have been together for five years. The Dane has not been exposed to homophobia or hate emails herself, but decided in the spring of 2019 to go actively into the debate on homophobia. This happened after FCK star Viktor Fischer was met by homophobic calls.

In a broadcast on TV 2, Harder openly talked about how she had previously fallen in love with a guy, but fell for Magdalena when they both played in Linköping:

'I didn't really think much about it. It just came very naturally. You have to be with the one you love. I have always felt that if there is something I want, then I do it and do not go into what other people think. And then I also have a good family that totally doesn't care who I love, just like it is pretty normal in the women's soccer world, "says the Wolfsburg player.

According to Harder, in the men's football »a front figure is missing. There are certainly gay and bisexual men in men's soccer too, but they obviously dare not stand out because the tone is different in the dressing room and among the fans. That is a sorry trend. You have to be proud of the one you love '.

More edge in women's football Courage to step up in the homophobia debate, Pernille Harder shares with female U.S. national team leader Megan Rapinoe, who up to the World Cup declared that her team would not accept an invitation from President Donald Trump if they returned home with the World Cup trophy. In addition, Trump was too homophobic and condescending to women:

"There are several in women's football who dare to have an opinion, although that may not be the opinion that other people think one should have. And so it gives something more edge. After all, not one of the really big men's team players actually does. Maybe just with the exception of Zlatan, ”Harder points out. Swedish Zlatan Ibrahimović has, among other things, commented on the Swedish immigration debate.

A party in Basel In addition to the fight against homophobia, Harder's main theme is gender equality. And here we are approaching the canceled match against Sweden and the football conflict with DBU.

Instead of looking back at the conflict, Harder first takes a mental detour to Switzerland. In 2018, the FC Basel football club held an anniversary party that got Harder out of the chair.

Before the party, the club had decided that the gentlemen should attend a gala party with a three-course menu, while their female counterparts were asked to sell the ticket and were literally eaten off with a sandwich:

“It's incredible that it can still occur today. But that's why it's so important that we have enough self-respect to say. And that women know what value we have. If we don't, they just do it again. And that is exactly why we had to take that fight with DBU, 'says Harder.

Similarly, Harder and teammates from Wolfsburg said when the club in 2017 asked the women's team to postpone their championship party until it became clear if the club's men's team avoided relegation.

When the women's team won "The Double" again the following year, no-one was thinking of issuing a ban - even if the men again fought relegation.

The conflict between the national team and the DBU was primarily about the remuneration of the women's team players. A sub-agreement between DBU and the Players' Association was landed in October 2017. But negotiations are soon on a long-term agreement, so that the national team is in control if Denmark should be able to arrange the European Championships in 2025 at home.

And here too the national team leader is ready to make demands. However, she fully agrees that in the future there will also be a difference between women's and men's salaries and bonus schemes, simply because Denmark does not have a women's league that can afford to pay the domestic players sufficiently in salary.

This is why DBU has to step in with scholarships, and then "there is something else you can't get," Harder points out.

The decisive point, however, is not the money, but that the national teams - regardless of gender - must have the same conditions for all the matches:

“Now just take the planes. Now we have to go to Georgia soon and play the European Championship qualifier. It is such a match that we risk playing a draw and thus lose important points to qualify for the European Championships in England. So it's mega important. But we are definitely traveling over there with two stops where we have to get up at 05:00 in the morning. DBU should, therefore, charter an aircraft. After all, they do this to the gentlemen, and so does the German and Swedish Football Federation for their wives, ”Harder points out.

Of other differences, the leader mentions that, unlike the gentlemen, the women travel without a cook and only occasionally have a volunteer analyst who can help understand and illustrate the tactics of the opponents. According to Harder, it is also not OK that the national team has only 18, and not 23, players with:

"It's a problem when we have to play 11 against 11. Then the physical therapist has to get into the field. There, I think we can demand equality and that it must be completely the same regardless of gender. And it's not, ”Harder points out.

The conflict was not the main problem Although the conflict is still filling, it is definitely not the whole story of why Denmark is not on the field in France:

“We simply weren't ready physically after the summer holidays in 2018, when we were going to play against Croatia and Sweden. Before the two matches went well. But we have learned from that and have now got a new physical trainer in Peter Krustrup. "

Harder is also confident that Peter Møller's new director of football, Peter Møller, will address the women's case to the DBU board.

She is aiming for Denmark to qualify for the European Championships in England in 2021, just as she hopes that Denmark can secure the European Championships in 2025:

"It will be crazy for Danish football, but we can learn something from them down here about how to set up fan zones and use modern, hard-hitting discos rather than always horn music for the matches," the national team leader says.

Although the level in France is high, Harder is not intimidated on behalf of Danish women's soccer: “We have a good team, and now we work with physics. This is where we need to put in. We are already fully involved in the technical, football and tactical aspects. "

According to the leader, a number of new talented players are also emerging, such as Emma Snerle from Fortuna Hjørring.

Harder welcomes the high viewership of the World Cup, which has seriously given women's football its popular breakthrough. In England, the fight against the United States was the most-watched TV show of 2019:

"I also don't understand if people can't see the exciting thing in eg. the battle between France and the United States. There are 40,000 at the stadium, high pace, chances, and fighter will. Now I have also seen men's football at the stadium several times, so it is not because I think 'hold it up, where does it go 100 times stronger', 'notes Harder.

Football camp in Ikast As we speak, several fans pass by in national team jerseys with women's names on their backs and no longer just men's stars such as Mbappé, Messi and Müller.

As a child, Harder had only one possible role model, Brazilian Marta, but it was now United gentlemen David Beckham and Ryan Giggs who hung in the children's room. Back in the nineties and nineties, there was also no opportunity to attend a girls' soccer camp.

That's the main explanation that, a few years ago, Harder and her sister and cousin decided to start a girls soccer camp:

“I want to pass on some of what I have learned both on and off the field. I even train the girls some of the time and give presentations. And this year I also had my mental trainer who gave parents some tips on how to be good parents. "

The world's best is the goal In 2018, Pernille Harder was named the second best Danish footballer ever to be Europe's best. The first to achieve this honor was Allan Simonsen in 1977. But despite the lack of World Cup, the goal remains to be the world's best footballer.

“I know it might not be very Danish with the Janet Act and all that. And I also dared to say it out loud first when I moved away from Denmark. But why is it so dangerous to say that I want to be the best in the world? One must dare to put words into one's dreams. And the worst thing that can happen is only that I don't reach it, but then I have pushed myself to do my utmost. "

The dream, which she first put into words when she came to Sweden, was born in Ikast. “Recently, I found a style that I wrote when I was ten years old. And there I wrote that I would be the world's best in ten years, 'says Harder.

The road over there is provisionally over Wolfsburg, where this year the club has invested in five to six new players to be able to conquer the Champions League trophy, which lost after another defeat to Lyon.

But Harder, whose contract expires in 2021, is open to trying her hand at a new country and league - also to learn a new language.

"German is doing very well," laughs Harder and continues:

"Although I do not always have a say in whether the pronoun should come in the middle or at the end."

During the World Cup, there have been rumors that Real Madrid are looking for the striker. As one of the last major clubs in Spain, the "king's club" now also enters women's soccer. Before the World Cup, the women's match between Barcelona and Atlético Madrid set a spectator record in Spain with over 60,000 on the limbs.

“We must say that both Denmark and Germany are behind. In England and Spain, they are targeting a professional league, where big men's clubs also invest in women's soccer. It would be optimal if we also did it at home. But it is clear that e.g. FC Midtjylland does not have as much money as Manchester United, so it will cost in the beginning, 'says Harder, pointing to FC North Zealand as a men's club, which is now also focusing on women's football.

On the team with Magdalena? A new club change could also open for the girlfriend couple Harder and Eriksson to put an end to the long-distance relationship, which is, however, facilitated by a direct flight connection from Hanover to London:

“Right now we are each running our own race. But we are about to be where we can again play on the same team. Defenders are slowing down a bit, but Magdalena has become one of the key players on Chelsea's team entering the Champions League semi-final, "Harder points out.

If the pair are on the same club team, there will also be no danger of the relationship being put to the test in a Champions League match between Chelsea and Wolfsburg:

“None of us can stand to lose. I want to win everything. Also in ludo against children. And so will Magda. If she loses cards to me, she won't talk to me for the rest of the day, 'says Harder, laughing.

But in France, the couple both get something to laugh at. Magda and the other Swedish players secure a bronze medal at the World Cup. Yet another image of the couple kissing each other goes around the world. Although Pernille Harder has not been on the field, much has been noticed by the Dane during the World Cup.

[jamesginortonblog]

No one could accuse James Norton of allowing himself to be typecast. The 34-year-old has played a vicar-turned-sleuth in Grantchester, a violent rapist in Happy Valley, and the aristocratic hero of War & Peace. He’s also number three in the betting to be the new James Bond. And he’s just about to add to his library of opposites with two new roles: the staid tutor John Brooke, who marries Emma Watson’s Meg March, in the star-studded new film adaptation of Little Women; and the flamboyant real-life figure at the centre of the Profumo scandal – Stephen Ward – in BBC One’s The Trial of Christine Keeler.

“Ward was 100 per cent the fall guy,” says Norton, sporting a dark-blue crushed velvet jacket and settling in on a chaise longue in an upmarket London hotel. The actor looks every bit as debonair as you’d expect for a man playing the high-society osteopath with connections that ran from Soho to the aristocracy. “The government needed to clear their own name by tarnishing someone else’s.”

It was Ward who introduced the 46-year-old Secretary of State for War John Profumo (Ben Miles) to 19-year-old model and showgirl Christine Keeler (Sophie Cookson) at a party at Lord Astor’s country house estate of Cliveden in 1961. It led to an affair that exposed Profumo as a security threat – thanks to Keeler’s simultaneous relationship with a Russian naval attaché.

Keeler and her friend Mandy Rice-Davies (Ellie Bamber) often stayed at Ward’s London mews flat, and the 50-year-old former public schoolboy would later be prosecuted for living off immoral earnings in a dubious case of establishment revenge. The two had contributed small amounts to household expenses. Ward committed suicide after the judge’s summing up amounted to a direction to the jury to find him guilty.

Amanda Coe’s stylish, evocative drama establishes Keeler and Rice-Davies as sexually liberated young women for their time. Does Norton think they were victims? “Ward definitely used certain relationships he had with young, beautiful women to ingratiate himself with the wealthy elite,” he says. “He also groomed them to a point… but it’s too simplistic to say he was a man who groomed young women. His relationship with these young girls was often a very positive one, he would enable them, take them out of poverty.” Keeler was from a disadvantaged background and fitted the mould of the “alley cats” Ward liked to befriend. Norton gives a terrific performance as the sleazy Pygmalion.

“I really warmed to him… you fall in love with these characters, and Stephen Ward was way ahead of his time, so brave in how he lived his life and expressed himself, his sexual tastes, his flirting with cross-dressing, in a world that was still incredibly repressed.

“And the final reckoning was that Stephen Ward had somehow corrupted these Tory ministers and it was all his fault, which is absurd.”

I wonder if Norton, the son of a retired college lecturer and a mother who taught medical ethics, is as dazzled by the truly posh as Ward was.

“Wealth or class are not things that I’m particularly dazzled by,” he says. “I am by talent.” He cites Little Women director Greta Gerwig and her partner Noah Baumbach, who made Netflix’s Marriage Story, as an example.

Norton himself is part of a powerhouse acting couple, with British star Imogen Poots, whom he became close to when they starred together in a play in 2017. They seem very happy. “It’s good,” he says, but adds, “my personal life is very normal, I have a house in Peckham, my [parents] live in Yorkshire. There's very little glamour and scandal.”

There was a little bit of the latter when his previous girlfriend, actress Jessie Buckley, said their break-up had been “acrimonious”, but Norton is far too canny to add fuel to that particular fire.

Similarly, he won’t comment on the rumours linking him to James Bond, insisting they are “based on nothing”. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have strong opinions on the series in general.

“We all know that with James Bond, large parts of it, and all the versions of it in the past, are now antiquated and it needs to be updated,” he says. “And I think that Barbara Broccoli and the producers are very aware of that. Bringing in people like Phoebe Waller-Bridge can only help.”

Might the spy be a little too one-dimensional for someone who has taken on so many interesting parts? Daniel Craig, who is stepping aside after the latest film No Time To Die comes out in April, has often seemed unhappy with the role.

“If I was to take on a franchise,” Norton says, “I would always want to complement it with something completely different.”

He has just taken on a big HBO sci-fi series, The Nevers, he says, and is in negotiations with the BBC about doing a second series of McMafia. We chat about the fact that the first series attracted a measure of criticism, including some for his own performance as Alex Godman, the scion of a Russian mafia family drawn reluctantly into the underworld. “There was an article about the three wooden faces of James Norton,” he says with a laugh.

How did he take it?

“It’s a rite of passage that you have [bad reviews],” he replies. “Ultimately, it’s an art form which is deeply subjective and you’re never going to please everyone.” The character was intended to be “inscrutable and calcified”, he adds. Nevertheless, he admits he might play it slightly differently second time around.

“Yeah, possibly,” he says. “But, then again, you don’t want to pander to the people who didn’t like it. There's so much content out there that people who don't like it can go and find something else.”

One of the factors that Norton and director James Watkins agreed upon when sketching out Godman’s background was his public school education. Norton is a public school boy too; a former pupil of Ampleforth, the leading Catholic boarding school which was found to have covered up the sexual abuse of scores of children in a devastating report in 2018.

Norton never saw any wrongdoing during his time there, but does admit to being “quite badly bullied” and credits one of the monks - a Father Peter - with helping him get through it. “I was able to go and just talk to him and he basically became my therapist,” says Norton. “I just sort of sobbed my eyes out.”

Has it left a mark? “It probably has a bit,” he says. “It’s not defined me, but it has informed who I am. I’m hyper aware if someone is being in any way ostracised on a film set, for example.”

On Little Women, he found himself on set with some of the industry’s biggest names, including Saoirse Ronan, Timothée Chalamet, Meryl Streep and Laura Dern. The film’s a deliriously romantic and sentimental take on the novel’s sibling rivalries, but it takes its duty to Louisa May Alcott’s study of the economic subjection of women seriously. “It's important for us to go back to those punctuation marks in the struggle towards equality and recognise how far we've come, but also how we're not quite there yet,” Norton says.

He and Watson were given the task of writing their own marriage vows for the film, which he says he laboured over but arrived with them unfinished to discover that Watson had already written hers and they were beautiful. He was just young enough to read the early Harry Potter books, he notes, but has only seen a couple of the films – “Don’t tell Emma.”

He plays Chalamet’s tutor – did he fancy the 23-year-old as everyone else seems to right now? He smiles. “He’s a beguiling and bizarre, unique force of nature,” he says. Norton had been wondering about wearing a suit to today’s photoshoot, but is glad he didn’t as he’s just bumped into the younger man in a Gorillaz tee-shirt and sunglasses. “Whenever he’s around, I feel about 10 years older than I am.”

Among all its bold women, I wonder if his own character – John Brooke – is just a teeny bit dull. He laughs. “He’s a little quieter than some of the other characters, but that allowed me to just witness all these great women actors. It was incredible.”

There’s certainly nothing dull or quiet about the character he plays in the film Mr Jones, which is released in February. It’s the surprisingly little-known story of Gareth Jones, the journalist who uncovered the Holodomor – the man-made famine genocide inflicted by the Soviet Union upon Ukraine in 1932-33, which is estimated to have killed up to 7.5 million people. “He blew the whistle on the Soviet Union,” says Norton. “He was the first person to go [to Ukraine], and come back and tell the world.”

In the West, the economic crash of 1929 had led to the Great Depression. “Everyone was looking at the Soviet experiment thinking, ‘Oh, it's working’,” Norton says. “They were getting into bed with Stalin and trade deals were being made. And no one was calling them out. Until this one serious, bespectacled, earnest Welsh journalist got on a train and risked his life to blow the whistle.”

I wonder if those types of films can command a big enough audience to keep getting made? He accepts that independent cinema is in a period of shrinkage, but says, “while the audience for this type of film might not be as big as a Marvel movie, we have to protect those stories because film isn't just about escapism. It's also about education.”

[maddie-grove]

The Top Twenty Books I Read in 2019

My main takeaways from the past year’s reading:

Sometimes you think something is happening because of magic, but then it turns out to have a non-magical explanation so weird that you find yourself saying, “You know what? I wish faeries or God were responsible for this. I’d honestly feel less disturbed.”

Stop bathing and changing your clothes and shaving for three years, three months, and three days. You’ll find out who your real friends are. I promise you that.

I want more books about bisexual ladies!!! Give them to me!!!

Anyway...

20. The Prodigal Duke by Theresa Romain (2017)

Childhood sweethearts Poppy Hayworth and Leo Billingsley were separated when his older brother, a duke, sent him away to make his fortune. Years later, the duke is dead, a financially successful Leo has come back to England to take his place, and Poppy has become a rope dancer at Vauxhall Gardens after a life-shattering event. New sparks are flying between them, but is love possible when so much else has changed? Leo and Poppy are believable and charming as old friends, Romain makes great use of obscure historical details from the oft-depicted Regency period, and I loved Leo’s difficult but caring elderly uncle.

19. Simple Jess by Pamela Morsi (1996)

Althea Winsloe, a young widow in 1900s Arkansas, has no interest in remarrying, but almost everyone in her small Ozarks community is pressuring her to remarry, and she still needs someone to help farm her land. Enter Jesse Best, a strong young man with cognitive disabilities who’s happy to take on the work. As he makes improvements to her farm and bonds with her three-year-old son, Althea gets to know him better and starts to see him in a new light. This earthy romance could’ve been a disaster, but instead it illustrates how people with disabilities are often...uh...simplified and de-sexualized in a way that denies them autonomy. Morsi has a similarly nuanced take on Althea and Jesse’s community, which is claustrophobic and supportive all at once.

18. Leah on the Offbeat by Becky Albertalli (2018)

Outspoken and insecure, bisexual high school senior Leah Burke is having a tough year. Her friend group is in turmoil, her single mom is seriously dating someone, and she’s caught between a sweet boy she’s not sure about and a pretty, perfect straight girl who couldn’t possibly be into her...right??? The sequel to the very cute Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda, Leah on the Offbeat pulls a The Godfather: Part II with its messy protagonist, sweetly surprising romance, and masterful comic set piece involving the Atlanta American Girl Doll restaurant.

17. Copper Sun by Sharon M. Draper (2006)

Kidnapped from her home in eighteenth-century Ghana, fifteen-year-old Amari is sold into slavery and winds up on a South Carolina plantation, where she faces terrible cruelty but finds friends in an enslaved cook, her little son, and eventually a sulky white indentured servant around her age. When their master escalates his already-atrocious behavior, the three young people flee south to the Spanish Fort Mose in search of freedom. Draper’s complicated characters, vivid descriptions, and deft handling of heavy subjects makes for top-notch historical YA fiction.

16. A Prince on Paper by Alyssa Cole (2019)

After her controlling politician father was jailed for poisoning a bunch of people in their small, prosperous African country, Nya Jerami gained unprecedented freedom but also became the subject of vicious gossip. Johan von Braustein, the hard-partying stepson of a European monarch, wants to help her, partly because he sympathizes and partly because he has a crush, but she thinks he’s too frivolous and horny (if wildly attractive). After an embarrassing misunderstanding compels them to enter a fake engagement, though, she begins to wonder if there’s more to him. I’m not a huge fan of contemporary romance, but this novel has the perfect combination of heartfelt emotion, delicious melodrama, and adorable fluff. 

15. One Perfect Rose by Mary Jo Putney (1997)

Stephen, the Duke of Ashburton, has always done the proper and responsible thing, but that all changes when he learns that he’s terminally ill. Wandering the countryside in the guise of an ordinary gentleman, he ends up joining an acting troupe and falling in love with Rosalind, the sensible adopted daughter of the two lead actors. Like another Regency romance on this list, this novel celebrates love in many forms: there’s the love story between Stephen and Rosalind, yes, but there’s also Rosalind’s loving relationship with her adopted family, the new bonds she forms with her long-lost blood relatives, the way her two families embrace the increasingly frightened Stephen, and the healing rifts between Stephen and his well-meaning but distant siblings. Stephen’s reconciliation with his mortality is also moving.

14. My One and Only Duke by Grace Burrowes (2018)

Facing a death sentence in Newgate, footman-turned-prosperous banker Quinton Wentworth decides to do one last good thing: marry Jane McGowan, a poor pregnant widow, so she and the baby will be financially set. Then he receives a pardon and a dukedom at the literal last minute, meaning that he and Jane have a more permanent arrangement than either intended. I fell in love with the kind-but-difficult protagonists almost at once, and with Burrowes’s gorgeous prose even faster. 

13. Eleanor and Park by Rainbow Rowell (2013)

It’s 1986, and comics-loving, post-punk-listening, half-Korean Park and bright, weird, constantly bullied Eleanor are just trying to get through high school in their rough Omaha neighborhood. He’s only grudgingly willing to let her share his bus seat at first, but this barely civil acquaintance slowly thaws into friendship and blossoms into love. Far from being the whimsical eighties-nostalgia-fest I expected, this is a bittersweet love story about two isolated young people who find love, belonging, and a chance for self-expression with each other in an often-hostile environment (a small miracle pre-Internet).

12. Shrill by Lindy West (2016)

In this memoir, Lindy West talks about the difficulties of being a fat woman, the thankless task of being vocally less-than-enthused about rape jokes, the joys of moving past self-doubt, and the very real possibility that Little John from Disney’s Robin Hood was played by “bear actor” Baloo, among other subjects. I was having a hard time during my last semester of law school this past spring, and this book’s giddy humor and inspiring messages really helped me in my hour of need.

11. Seduction: Sex, Lies, and Stardom in Howard Hughes's Hollywood by Karina Longworth (2018)

In 1925, very young businessman Howard Hughes breezed into Hollywood with nothing but tons of family wealth, a soon-to-be-divorced wife, and a simple dream: make movies about fast planes and big bosoms. He got increasingly weird and reactionary over the next thirty years, then retired from public life. More a history of 1920s-1950s Hollywood than a biography, this book has the same sharp writing and in-depth film analysis that makes me love Longworth’s podcast You Must Remember This.

10. The Beguiled by Thomas Cullinan (1966)

In Civil-War-era Virginia, iron-willed Martha Farnsworth and her nervous younger sister try to run their nearly empty girls’ boarding school within earshot of a battlefield. When one girl finds Union soldier John McBurney injured in the woods, she brings him back to the house, where he exploits every conflict and secret among the eight girls and women (five students, two sisters, and one enslaved cook). Charming and manipulative, he nevertheless finds himself in over his head. Cullinan makes great use of the eight POVs and the deliciously claustrophobic setting; it’s fascinating to watch the power dynamics and allegiances shift from scene to scene.

9. A Gentleman Never Keeps Score by Cat Sebastian (2018)

Reserved tavern keeper Sam Fox wants to help out his brother’s sweetheart by finding and destroying a nude portrait she once sat for; disgraced gentleman Hartley Sedgwick isn’t sure what he wants after having his life ruined twice over, but he happened to inherit his house from the man who commissioned the painting...plus he’s not exactly reluctant to assist kind, handsome Sam in his quest. I wrote about this heart-melting romance two times last year; suffice it to say that it’s not only one of the best Regencies I’ve ever read, but also possibly the best romance I’ve ever read about the creation of a found family.

8. Frog Music by Emma Donoghue (2014)

Blanche Beunon, a French-born burlesque dancer in 1876 San Francisco, has a lot going on: her mooching boyfriend has turned on her, her sick baby is missing, and her cross-dressing, frog-hunting friend Jenny Bonnet was just shot dead right next to her. In the middle of a heat wave, a smallpox epidemic, and a little bit of mob violence, she must locate her son and solve Jenny’s murder. This is a glorious work of historical fiction; you can see, hear, smell, and feel the chaotic world of 1870s San Francisco, plus Blanche’s character arc is amazing.

7. The Patrick Melrose novels (Never Mind, Bad News, Some Hope, Mother’s Milk, and At Last) by Edward St. Aubyn (1992, 1992, 1994, 2005, and 2012, respectively)

Born to an embittered English aristocrat and an idealistic American heiress, Patrick Melrose lives through his father’s sadistic abuse and his mother’s willful blindness (Never Mind),  does a truly staggering amount of drugs in early adulthood (Bad News), and makes a good-faith effort at leading a normal life (Some Hope). Years later, the life he’s built with his wife and two sons is threatened by his alcoholism and reemerging resentment of his mother (Mother’s Milk), but there may be a chance to salvage something (At Last). Despite the suffering and cruelty on display, these novels were the farthest thing from a dismaying experience, thanks to the sharp characterization, grim humor, and great sense of setting. Also, I love little Robert Melrose, an anxious eldest child after my own heart. 

6. The Perilous Gard by Elizabeth Marie Pope (1974)

In 1550s England, no-nonsense Kate Sutton is exiled to the Perilous Gard, a remote castle occupied by suspicious characters, including the lord’s guilt-ridden younger brother Christopher. Troubled by the holes she sees in the story of the tragedy that haunts him, she does some problem-solving and ends up in a world of weird shit. Cleverly plotted, deliciously spooky, and featuring an all-time-great heroine, this book was an absolute treat. The beautiful Richard Cuffari illustrations in my edition didn’t hurt, either.

5. An Unconditional Freedom by Alyssa Cole (2019)

Daniel Cumberland, a free black man from New England traumatized from being sold into slavery, and Janeta Sanchez, a mixed-race Cuban-Floridian lady from a white Confederate family, have been sent on a mission to the Deep South by the Loyal League, a pro-Union spy organization. Initially hostile to everyone (but particularly to somewhat naive Janeta), Daniel warms to his colleague, but will her secrets, his shattered faith in justice, and the various dangers they face prevent them from falling in love? Nah. Alyssa Cole’s historical romances deliver both on the history and the romance, and this is one of her strongest entries.

4. The Lady’s Guide to Celestial Mechanics by Olivia Waite (2019)

Heartbroken by the death of her father and the marriage of her ex-girlfriend, Lucy Muchelney decides she needs a change of scenery and takes a live-in position translating a French astronomy text for Catherine St. Day, the recently widowed Countess of Moth. Catherine, used to putting her interests on hold for an uncaring spouse, is intrigued by this awkward, independent lady. I’ve read f/f romances before, but this sparkling Regency was the first to really blow me away with its fun banter, neat historical details, and perfect sexual tension.

3. The Wager by Donna Jo Napoli (2010)

After losing his entire fortune to a tidal wave, Sicilian nineteen-year-old Don Giovanni de la Fortuna sinks into poverty and near-starvation. Then Devil makes him an offer: all the money he wants for as long as he lives if he doesn’t bathe, cut his hair, shave, or change his clothes for three years, three months, and three days. This fairy-tale retelling is an extraordinarily moving fable about someone who learns to acknowledge his own suffering, recognize it in others, and extend compassion to all. 

2. Vampires in the Lemon Grove by Karen Russell (2013)

In this collection, Russell weaves strange tales of silkworm-women hybrids in Japan, seagulls who collect objects from the past and future, and, yes, vampires in the lemon grove. She also posits the very important question: “What if most (but not all) U.S. presidents were reincarnated as horses in the same stable and had a lot of drama going on?” My favorite stories were “Proving Up” (about a nineteenth-century Nebraska boy who encounters death and horror on the prairie), “The Graveless Doll of Eric Mutis” (about a disadvantaged high school student who discovers an effigy of the even more hapless boy he tormented), and “The Barn at the End of the Term” (the horse-president story). 

1. The Wonder by Emma Donoghue (2016)

Lib Wright, an Englishwoman who has floundered since her days working for Florence Nightingale during the Crimean War, is hired to observe Anna O’Donnell, an eleven-year-old Irish girl famous for not eating for four straight months. With a jaundiced attitude towards the Irish and Catholicism, Lib is confident that she’ll quickly expose Anna as a fraud, but she finds herself liking the girl and getting increasingly drawn into the disturbing mystery of her fast. Like The Perilous Gard, this novel masterfully plays with the possibility of the supernatural, then introduces a technically mundane explanation that’s somehow much more eerie. Donoghue balances the horror and waste that surrounds Anna, though, with the clear, bright prose and the moving relationship that develops between her and Lib, who grows beyond her narrow-mindedness and emotional numbness. I stayed up half the night to finish this novel, which cemented Emma Donoghue’s status as my new favorite author.

[isabeljack-blog]

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[lordjohntheshow]

John Grey and his boyfriend Stephan Namzten have a great life (and now three dogs) and are considering taking the next big step: marriage and children. Complications arise. This is a Modern AU set in 2019. 

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 

VANITY FAIR, November 2017

A FAMILY AFFAIR

An excerpt from the actor’s forthcoming memoir WILD NIGHTS chronicling his early years growing up to his days as a struggling actor. In anticipation of the Royal Wedding enjoy his take on a wedding among Britain’s upper crust.

By: Percy Wainwright

Imagine my surprise when my stepfather George invited me to his third wedding, in London. He wanted me there with him as he took on his new life and invited me out for the “whole season”. I took one look around my tiny, non air conditioned studio apartment in the Valley and knew I had no other choice. Within 24 hours I was touching down in Heathrow. I wondered a little about why George invited me, but in a small way it made sense: he had no real family himself and didn’t want to feel left out. He let me have the use of his apartment- or “flat” as I learned to call it, having already moved in with his bride to be.

 I then did what any self-respecting 22 year old with a large, empty apartment, an allowance, and too much free time would do. I went clubbing. That’s how I first met Kay*. It was sometime past midnight, and the DJ was trying out some experimental trance pop. I saw him before he saw me. He was small, but he didn’t have that obnoxious edge some short men get. Cute blonde hair a shade most boys grow out of. Muscular, but the white shirt and jeans he wore showed he didn’t really care about his appearance. He glided through the crowd, disappearing in the back room for a moment. I lost track of him until I saw him cut through the dance floor to leave. On a whim, I grabbed his hand and kissed it. He looked up at me and laughed, crinkling a pair of baby blues that would have made Paul Newman jealous. I pulled him to me, like he was water in the desert. The music was too loud to have a coherent conversation, but neither of us wanted one. 

After three or so songs (who can really tell with electronica?) he was pressing me up against the wall outside the bathroom, kissing my lips, my neck, as if he wanted to swallow me whole. In fifteen or so minutes we were in my flat and I was flat on my back. When I woke up the next morning alone in that big bed, I actually laughed- I’m usually the one that leaves them high and dry.

I still went clubbing, but I didn’t see my blonde boy again. Four weeks before the wedding George invited me out to a dinner with the family. “They’re gentry, you know. You don’t have to bow or anything, but do you know the proper forms of address?” He’d asked me nervously, in the taxi on the way over. “Um.. milord and milady?” I’d said, trying to remember what I’d learned from my days of getting high and watching Downton Abbey. He sighed. “They’ll just think you’re an uncouth American, it will be fine.” He’d huffed in reply. It was cute, to see him so nervous to make a good impression.

How to describe the family. Everyone looked like one of those paparazzi pictures of the royal family on their time off: trying to look normal in jeans and a sweater but the outfit still cost 700 pounds. I suppose I’m not one to talk though, my style’s always been very Gucci via Goodwill.

My new stepmother’s flat also had that rich, lived in feel. There was a couch from 1972 next to what I’m fairly sure was a pair of original Chippendale settee chairs. Every flat surface or shelf was covered by books: leather bound ones in the library and slick, glossy ones in all of the real living areas. Yes, you read that right: this was an apartment. With a library.

We all sat down to drinks in the living room. I chose one of the Chippendales, of course. An actual butler took my drink order. Once everyone was arrayed and properly lubricated, the true conversation began. The son who was obviously serving as Head of the Family grilled me and George about our jobs, hobbies, acquaintances, and was probably about to start on what petty misdemeanors we’d committed when his wife patted his arm and started a real conversation instead of a background check. It was boring, but I was surprised to find I was enjoying myself. Mostly I was enjoying what I am dead certain were a pair of original Degas’ ballerina studies.

Nearly an hour in I was shocked out of my art appreciation when my own tiny dancer walked in. He was out of breath, dressed for work (a boring navy suit, so a professional of some type, I noted), and apologizing profusely, to his mother, his soon to be stepfather, his annoyed brother, and then his gaze fell on me. I’ll say this about him: I’d never want to play poker against him. There’s not a man alive better at controlling his face. For a moment I was certain he didn’t remember me (I mean, I was in a clean cut Oxford, not the neon green mesh tank he’d last seen me in.)

“Hello. You must be Percy. I’m Kay.” He said, warmly, holding out his hand for me to shake. The look he gave me, and only me, had so much heat I thought I was back in L.A.

He sat across from me when we moved to dinner, and chatted politely. I was annoyed to find someone so handsome was also smart, and funny, and kind, especially to his mother and my stepfather. Yet, when he raised his brows to me at the end of dinner- a challenge, and invitation- I was all mush.

The next four weeks went by quickly- too quickly. All the pomp and nonsense of what American hetero weddings have become pales in comparison to An English Society Wedding. There were morning suit fittings, tux fittings, and even normal suit fittings, to make sure I wouldn’t be looked at some poor American cousin. Forget a bridal shower at some swanky country club. There were at least three engagement parties, a trip to the Queen Anne Enclosure of the Royal Ascot (requiring another suit), and multiple days involving skiffs, yachts, polo ponies, and cricket. I was game: it was like being stuck in some specialty park at Disneyworld, and I love to learn the rules so I can break them. Here were a few I discovered:

              -You can’t ask people where they go on vacation. You ask them where they summer, or winter, or, for the younger, sportier ones, where they ski.

              -An American accent threw them, especially when I turned on the Southern drawl I usually kept safely packed away. If I wasn’t from Newport, or Vail, or New York, I was no one of importance.

              -No one ever discussed money, but every conversation was about it: where children were going to school, what new homes or paintings were being purchased, who had just closed what deal.

              -And unlike in L.A., where everyone bedecked themselves in the latest runway looks, here you often learned the richest people also had the oldest clothes. The Princess Royal attended one of these parties in a dress she’d had since 1983. I know the year because I asked her.

By the time the wedding rolled around, part of me was ready to go back to the plastic sheen and bounce of Los Angeles. Other parts of me, like my heart, wanted to stay in this weird world forever, because it’s where Kay was. If this world was a weird Disneyworld, than I was its Cinderella. I’d been scraping things together for so long, spent so many nights wondering where the money was going to come from, how I was going to eat, I cannot explain the relief of having that disappear. Of having someone ready to pick up the check like nothing- and unlike a lot of the men I’d slept with, not expecting a quid pro quo.

Kay and I spent a few weeks before we even had sex again- he was busy, and I was being pulled along to every wedding event anyone could possibly imagine. It’s the stolen moments I remember the most. The way his breath hitched when he saw me partially undressed during our tux fitting. How he always made sure I had what I wanted to drink, no matter the party we were at. When his hand brushed mine and we hooked our pinkies together, walking down this hallway or that. And the night we were finally together again: breathing our secrets together in the dark.

I told him I loved him. I didn’t actually say “I love you”, I’m not an idiot. I told him “I’ve never felt this close to someone,” and that “I’ve told you things… I’ve never told anyone before” and “I know this must sound strange.” He soaked it up, and looked at me, those blue eyes full of affection, rubbed my arm. “I care deeply for you, Percy. My heart… I think someone else has that. I can give you everything else.” He said it like he’d pried it out of himself… carefully and painfully.

I wish everything had been enough for me.

The summer swept along, and suddenly it was the day I’d come for all along: the wedding. It was held in a quaint village in a “small, country chapel” that sat the two hundred guests with ease. The interior looked like a florist’s shop the night before Mother’s Day. (Kay’s big brother had to take at least three puffs from his inhaler and everyone had to pretend they didn’t notice it happening.) All the women were arrayed in pastels, or florals, most looking ten years older than they actually were in the severe, pinned up styles the occasion demanded. One of the coach horses ate the fascinator Kay’s girl cousin had talked about incessantly over the summer. But seeing my stepfather trip over his words, bursting with happiness at his new life and new wife was truly one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen. In short, it was a perfect family wedding.

And then it was over. They were off on their honeymoon, backpacking in East Asia as if they were 22 and not 62. I’d seen my stepfather off. I knew he would always be part of my life, but that I wasn’t meant to live in his. I finally understood why they call it a flat: that’s all I felt walking around that apartment.

I wanted Kay to say: “I love you. Move in with me. Marry me, when it’s finally legal.” He didn’t. He was still caring, and attentive, and sweet, but we never talked about love or a future. Maybe that’s why I invited the Swede back to the flat on the last night before I left. Why I forgot that Kay was coming over to cook me a farewell dinner. Why I didn’t lock the door.

Turns out, he’s not as good as a poker player as I’d thought. I saw it all. Shock, dismay, pain, but never the anger. He left, never saying a word.

It wasn’t until the next day, somewhere 10,000 feet above Chicago, my suitcase full of a bunch of fancy clothes I’d wear only to auditions that I realized he always got quiet when he was angry.

*names, dates, and details have been altered to protect the innocent

[francesfromdc]

My Transgendered Lifestyle -- Read My Blog!

Resolve right now to explore roads you haven't previously traveled. 😊 You might be pleasantly surprised and you might discover some new facets about yourself that you didn't know existed! And most of all, have fun and enjoy  starting with.... Reading my Tumblr Blog!

If you like compassion, tenderness, sensitivity--traditionally female virtues, then maybe the right guy for you is one whose feminine, creative, and artistic side is not locked up and concealed under a macho cover. Unconventional? Yes. Atypical? Extraordinary? Absolutely. But the type of girl or guy I'm looking for is, among many other things, unconventional, atypical, and extraordinary. I hope you’ll take the time to read my entire profile, which I admit is much longer than most. The seemingly endless commentary 😊 will give you more insight regarding my not so normal but very interesting, fun and low stress life. Many people who did not wish to express an interest in me have written me simply to say that they enjoyed reading my profile.

I'm a lover of fashion and arts, with a lifelong passion for cherishing, honoring, and embracing all aspects of feminine beauty. My favorite creative outlet is cross dressing and gender bending. I look at this as an art form and take it very seriously. I try to create a very authentic, classy and often glam look once or twice a month that's not over the top like the drag queens (not that there's anything wrong with being an over the top drag queen! 😊 I've impersonated Marilyn Monroe for several Halloweens and a few parties here and there, and I must say that it's about the most fun I've ever had. Other celebrity impersonations I've done were Audrey Hepburn, Madonna, Paris Hilton, Bettie Page, Natalie Portman as the Black Swan, Daryl Hannah as the evil nurse from Kill Bill, and Elsa the Ice Queen from "Frozen".

I'm searching for fun people who are creative, bold, confident and very special  who would appreciate and embrace the exciting and creative world of fashion, beauty, fitness, performing arts, role play, cosplay, pinup fashion, gender bending, and even (mild -- nothing hard core--I' m a sub)- S&M / B&D.

LGBTQBDSM -- If I'm looking for people who will accept me as I am, I certainly would would accept her lifestyle choices. Not many women would embrace this lifestyle--I realize this-- but I'm confident that there are some and within that group, I'm confident that there is one woman who's life I will enrich, and vice versa. I know she exists.   My ultimate goal is establishing a long-term, romance-filled, caring and life sharing relationship, keeping in mind that marriage and serious relationships involve work, and I'm ready and willing to expend the effort and receive the rich personal rewards and fulfillment that love and caring brings.

Although my unorthodox lifestyle is not always easy, it's never boring and I feel very fortunate to have the desire and physical attributes to honor and cherish women and femininity in a realistic, creative, tasteful, respectful, loving and non-intrusive manner. It's a part of me that has always existed. Prior attempts to change and conform to a more traditional lifestyle have not worked for me, and as such, I have fully accepted and truly enjoy my femme side which I now know will always be a part of me. I get a lot of questions like "Are you in femme mode 24/7?" So I'll answer that question early in the profile and say, no my "everyday look" is male. (But I often playfully note the difference between me in male mode and me in femme mode as "drab vs. fab" 😊.

As a male, I'm often mistaken for a much younger person, (and occasionally mistaken for a girl--woo hoo!!) which in my opinion, is due to my dedication to health and exercise, my slender body and lack of facial hair, creative and fun choices in fashion, and a youthful fun, and positive outlook on life. No boring baggy jeans "dockers" or Donald Trump Navy Blue Suit/ (ridiculously long) Red Tie for me, thank you!

I have lots of goals which can be pursued in male or femme modes, including... ...finding a (romantic or platonic) partner for Rollerblading and ice skating at the outdoor rinks--(a great exercise and AN ABSOLUTE MUST for the body, mood, and mental clarity!) my favorite ice rink is the Sculpture Garden at 7th & Constitution Ave. I've been skating the outdoor rinks heavily since 2016.

During the warmer months (April - November) I bump up the rollerblading and cut back on the ice skating, going to the indoor rink at Mount Vernon Recreation center or the Medstar (formerly known as Kettler) Iceplex in Ballston once or twice during the summer if that. I always look forward to the beautiful spring and summer days on my rollerblades with a return to the outdoor ice rinks in November. The beginning of spring -- with the cherry blossoms -- the mild air and the longer days, is my favorite time of year. I look at it as a reward for enduring the winter months!

I also would like to explore and cultivate more activities such as:

★First and foremost★ ---Vacations--(Key West, Italy, and Hawaii are just a few of the places on my list). I have not traveled for pleasure much, but doing more of this is one of my top goals. Over the years, I've traveled for business, but I usually found those trips to be boring. I'd welcome the opportunity to meet someone who is interested in vacationing more and would like a fun vacation partner, even if it's just on a platonic level. In July, 2016 I met up with a group of rollerbladers in Copenhagen for three days of Denmark city and rural skating -- my first visit to Denmark! I re-joined that group for four days in Seville (Spain) in the first week of October, 2017. What a lovely city and a very rewarding (although exhausting!) experience! And for 2018 --in early September I joined them for the third time in three years: ✫¸.•°*”˜˜”*° PARIS!´✫¸.•°*”˜˜”*° c'était merveilleux!!! August 4, 2019 update: In mid July, I spent a lovely week in Berlin with this wonderful group -- many friends and familiar faces, as well as some new friends! I'm looking forward to my next European trip -- probably during the summer or fall of 2020.

★ Ballroom dancing--I'm a complete novice, but I think it would be fun to try, and perhaps occasionally (with the right partner) experimenting with reversing the roles, with the girl -- the genetic girl that is --wearing a men's suit and leading! I also have three relatively new and strong dance passions: (1) "The Carolina Shag"  (2) Tap Dancing, and (3) Popping. When done with precision, The Shag is a joy to watch and I'm sure it's even more fun to perform. Watch these two Shaggers and you'll probably catch the Shag Fever too!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8l5pczCZw04

If you're a good dance instructor, I'd certainly be willing to pay you for lessons -- even if you're not interested in forming any type of personal relationship.

★ Movies and theater (here in the DC area, but also day and/or overnight trips to New York). I think this is an aesthetically stimulating activity, yet most of us seem to only do this sort of thing every now and then.

★ Al fresco dining -- beautiful weather and people watching in all parts of DC, Bethesda, Fells Point, Inner Harbor and many others. Warm summer nights enjoying dinner, the energy and enthusiasm at the Georgetown waterfront (Washington Harbor is as good as it gets! And after dinner, a leisurely stroll along the waterfront or through some of the more vibrant sections of town to me, is very romantic. And the brand new "Wharf" on the SW DC waterfront has a lot of promise! I often like to do something very different and get really dressed up (sometimes femme, sometimes homme) and enjoy a nice restaurant during the week when everyone else seems to be in "business attire" or casual mode.

★ Home improvement projects. I'm AWFUL at doing these things myself, but I'm confident that these skills can be learned and I think I'd get a lot more satisfaction from doing some projects myself, such as painting, trim/molding replacement and addition, tile installation. I think it would be interesting to find a woman who has these skills, and also a bit ironic me to learn from her while I give her advice about makeup and clothes/accessories!

A topic related to home improvement is automobile repair and maintenance. I own a wonderful older BMW, but things break and wear out. If you're good at automobile repair/maintenance, I'm always looking for someone who enjoys working on older cars. Many of the shops in my area take the easy way out and say, "we'd rather not work on a car this old -- too much trouble and limited parts availability".

★ I'd like to do something to help disadvantaged children or others who aren't as fortunate as myself. I'm open to any suggestions you may have, and if this is something you're involved in, I'd certainly be interested in joining you in doing some good things for others.

★ Horseback riding. I've been on and around horses about a dozen times over the years, which has given me only basic knowledge and skills. I'd like to get serious about it, making riding a regular part of my life. I know that owning a horse is A LOT of work, so if you own a horse, I would gladly help out with the chores.

★ I love water skiing, jet skiing, and surfing. My first time on water skis was when I was 14 years old, and after about one hour of using two skis, I was able to get up on one ski. I haven't been water skiing in many years, but one thing is certain -- I do not want to own a boat! It's just too much work and too many headaches. Many people know the expression, ..."the two happiest days of my life: The day I bought my boat, and the day I SOLD my boat!"... So not having access to a boat means I won't be doing much water skiing! And not living near a beach means that I won't be doing much surfing! So you might be wondering why I even mentioned these activities. I guess it's just something that provides a lot of enjoyment just thinking about it. And I love to watch the surfing documentaries and imagine myself on those 50+ foot waves on Hawaii's North Shore. I guess we all have things that we fantasize about!

I'll be happy to answer ANY questions you may have. I'm single, never married (but there's still hope for me!), no kids, creative, imaginative, and lots of fun. I own a wonderful townhouse in a vibrant location (almost free and clear!), I'm financially secure, and I try to lead a healthy, active, and relatively stress-free life. And if you've read this far and decided that this is just too much for you, well I certainly understand, but I hope what you just read provided a fun and interesting diversion to your day and perhaps gave you a reason to smile or the notion to pass this along to one of your friends who may be more inclined to embrace a multi-faceted, non-traditional relationship.

You are MORE THAN WELCOME to express an interest in becoming a platonic friend or an activity partner! And to suz, sko, sso, and t ...Thanks for dropping in! 😊 All the best to you in your search for your ideal match!

Oh good! You're still reading.😊 My career for the last 20 years has involved doing what I absolutely love. My work doesn't really seem like work to me and that's how I know that it's the right thing for me! I often think to myself, ..."wow, I can't believe I'm getting PAID for doing this!"

I’m especially good at:

★ Making people feel good about themselves. Recently the American Film Institute honored Jane Fonda. When she spoke, one of her comments was particularly thought provoking: "It's better to be interested than interesting". I have long realized that asking questions about others rather than bragging about oneself works best and feels right for me.

★ Reflexology, which I will gladly provide on a regular basis for someone near and dear to me. If you wear heels a lot, you will love the soothing and stress reducing aspects of this wonderful type of massage.

★ Rollerblading and Ice Skating -- I love and thrive on the exercise that these invigorating activities provide. I am thankful that I have an outlet for exercise that doesn't really seem like exercise. Plus no health club dues, golf green fees, or other significant costs associated with many exercise and recreational routines! I think I'd get bored with running or riding the stationary bike, or walking the treadmill. And if I'm bored with it, I would most likely limit the activity or even give it up.

★ Thinking, feeling, and dressing in a youthful, energetic, creative, and fun way. I am enamored with Betsey Johnson -- the 73 year old fashion designer who to me, is the epitome of a youthful, creative, energetic and fun mindset! She is known to do a cartwheel on stage at the end of her fashion shows! Another older person who had tons of energy and refused to fade away was Elaine Stritch, the Broadway actress and singer. There's a wonderful documentary about her called "Elaine Stritch: Shoot Me". At the other end of the spectrum, my next door neighbor for example -- who is just a few years older than me -- usually wears faded and worn shorts, a dingy white t-shirt, black socks and wing tip shoes, and seems to have a constant scowl on his face. Really? Black socks and wing tip shoes with shorts?? If he's going for the "frumpy old man look", he's got it down pat!

★ The Sunday Washington Post crossword puzzle-- I consistently get 95-100% of the answers. I'm always amazed at how I might feel I am totally stumped, but come back the next day to easily get more answers right. I've heard that regular crossword puzzle activity is good for Alzheimer's prevention.

★ I  make awesome Espresso! I've tried them all, but the one I keep going back to is "Cafe Bustello". Oh yes, and did I mention I'm good with makeup and femme fashions?

★ The first thing people notice about me is healthy smooth, radiant and glowing skin which has almost no facial hair.

Movies give me a lot of enjoyment. I have a wide range of interests including TCM, and in particular movies by Alfred Hitchcock, David Lynch, Quentin Tarrantino, Woody Allen, Mel Brooks, and Stanley Kubrick to name a few. I have recently become familiar with the work of a French director Catherine Breillat. Her films have over the years sparked a lot of controversy, mainly due to her blunt and objective handling of sexual themes.

Are there any movies that make you cry every time you see them? The first time I saw "The Kite Runner" I cried. The second time I saw it, I wanted to see if it had the same effect, and yes it did. And even the third time I saw it, I cried. This kind of emotional release is very therapeutic! There have been other movies over the years that have made me cry, but a box of Kleenex is always needed for a viewing of "The Kite Runner". I'd be interested in hearing about any movies that have a similar effect on you.

I can rely on "Cinema Paradiso", the 1990 Oscar winning Italian film, to produce a strong emotional response.

The Oscar nominated 1985 Swedish film, "My Life As a Dog" is also very touching and poignant.

Another example, and another Oscar winner, is "Dances With Wolves". One of the final scenes, in which "Wind In His Hair" shouts down at "Dances With Wolves" from a ridge high above: ...."I am Wind in His Hair! Do you see that I am your friend? Can you see that I will always be your friend?"

"Manchester By the Sea" starring Casey Affleck (2017 Oscar Winner for Best Actor). If that movie doesn't move you, I really can't imagine what would!

The ending of "To Sir With Love" -- Sydney Poitier as Mr. Thakeray (aka Sir) accepting his gift from his students: ..."well ... I think I better go and put it away"... Gets to me every time!

And speaking of Sydney Poitier, I recently saw "A Raisin in the Sun" (1961) in its entirety. I've seen bits and pieces, but oddly-- had not seen the whole movie. I'm amazed that Sydney wasn't nominated for an Oscar in this role. And I now am very eager to see the play!

In 2018, I saw two Japanese movies on a flight that brought me to tears. Perhaps it was the travel exhaustion that brought it on, but there I was, sitting quietly with a river of tears flowing on my face. The first one was called, "The Lies She Loved", and the second one which REALLY got to me, was called "Color Me True".

Over thirty years ago, I saw a movie directed by Steven Spielberg called "Empire of the Sun" which starred a 13 year old unknown actor named Christian Bale.  Of course, most of us movie lovers know that CB is now a mega star. I was fortunate enough to see it again recently, now with high definition and surround sound!  The story is set in the early 1940's.  A privileged English boy (Bale) is living in Shanghai when the Japanese invade and force all foreigners into prison camps.  I was surprised to see that the reviews -- even the great Roger Ebert, gave this film a lukewarm review.  But I loved it, and cried a river of tears!

I occasionally enjoy movies that are very poorly written, directed and acted. You know, movies that are so bad they are good! Many of us know about Ed Wood -- probably the most famous of the bad movie directors-- "the worst of the worst!" I recently discovered a director named Bert I. Gordon who specialized in really bad sci-fi movies. What makes these movies even funnier is the fact that they were intended to be serious drama. The special effects were hilarious and very low budget, the acting was stiff, and the plots lacked any kind of structure and logic. Gordon's "Attack of the Puppet People" (1958) is delightfully bad! In this movie, a mad scientist/doll maker shrinks people so they can be his puppets!¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•.✫And... "Queen of Outer Space" (1958) starring Zsa Zsa Gabor. No additional explanation is necessary for this one! And extremely bad movies aren't limited to the 50's.

After recently seeing "The Disaster Artist" (2017), it appears that Ed Wood has some serious competition for worst director and worst movie of all time. His name is Tommy Wiseau and his movie from 2003 titled, "The Room" is a perfect example of film making at its worst. You can learn all about this delightfully bad monstrosity by watching The Disaster Artist which is by the way, an excellent movie about the making of an awful movie. Don't miss it!

I prefer film noir and drama over comedy, sci-fi, and rom-com, but I really can't think of a genre that hasn't provided me with some enjoyment. I think I've seen every "Twilight Zone" episode --the original ones with Rod Serling--multiple times. I always enjoy the SciFi Channel's New Year's Day Twilight Zone Marathon! If you have a favorite TZ episode, I'd be interested in hearing about it. Three of my favorites are "What You Need", "Eye of the Beholder", "To Serve Man" (IT'S A COOKBOOK!!! 😊), and "Twenty-Two" ("Room for one more, Honey!)

Musicals: Chicago, Rocky Horror, Hair Spray, The Producers, West Side Story, and Frozen. "The Fabulous Baker Boys", while not really a musical, features one of my favorite and most sensual performances ever: Michelle Pfeiffer singing "Making Whoopee" while lounging on top of Jeff Bridges' piano in a slinky red dress. I know that Jeff Bridges wasn't really playing the piano, but they did such a good job making it look as though he was actually playing. And note how Michelle steps down off the piano to sit next to Jeff -- stepping on a very thin ledge while wearing very high heels. How did she do that?

Everyone knows and loves the dancing of Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers, including myself. But the often overlooked solo performances from Ginger are amazing. One in particular was from a 1942 movie called "Roxie Hart" which, by the way was the inspiration for the musical, "Chicago". In "Roxie Hart", Ginger does sort of a tap dance going up these metal stairs and she just makes it look so effortless. I also love the quote (it's origin is not exactly clear), ..."Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did, except backwards and wearing high heels!"

Other vintage female dancers who mesmerize me are Vera Ellen, Cyd Charisse, Debbie Reynolds, Rita Moreno, Leslie Caron, Ann Miller, and Mitzi Gaynor. And probably the most entertaining dance sequence I've ever seen on film (oddly enough performed by a man--go figure!) is Donald O'Connor doing "Make Them Laugh" in the movie, "Singing In the Rain" ====>

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lO-FXFfhsEc

The 2011 Oscar winning film, "The Artist" has an amazing dance sequence at the end featuring the ultra charming Berenice Bejo as "Peppy Miller"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i2nNmU5v8zM

Occasionally I'll see a movie for the first time even though it was made decades ago One such example -- an amazing movie-- is "Reflections in a Golden Eye" (1967). I can't believe I missed seeing it all these years. Well, without giving too much of the plot away, it's set in the late 1940's and centers around an army Major's (Marlon Brando) latent homosexuality. And because it was the 1940's the major's sexuality is revealed only with subtle clues. His wife is played by one of the greatest actresses that ever lived -- Elizabeth Taylor. In one scene, an army Colonel (Brian Keith) comments that the army could have "made a man" out of his effeminate domestic worker and that he would have been a "better person" if he acted "normally". The major (Brando) then comments (in his typical Brando vocal style), and I'm paraphrasing some of it:

"So what you're saying is, that any FULFILLMENT obtained at the EXPENSE OF NORMALCY is wrong, and should NOT be allowed to bring happiness. In short, it is better, because it is MORALLY HONORABLE, for the SQUARE PEG to keep scraping about the round hole rather than to DISCOVER AND USE the unorthodox square that would fit it’ The Colonel replies, Why, you put it exactly right. ‘Don’t you agree with me?’ Brando's character: "No" (I think this is a significant and poignant anti-hate /pro tolerance message, especially for a film made in 1967)

✫I recently saw for the first time, a movie made in 1965 which was an adaption of a play from 1962 called "A Thousand Clowns" starring Jason Robards. His character (Murray) is an eccentric comedy writer who is pressured to conform to society in order to retain custody of his 12 year old nephew.

An example of his eccentricity -- here Murray is leaning out of his window, very early before most people are awake. He yells: “This is your neighbor speaking! I'm sure I speak for all of us when I say that something must be done about your garbage cans in the alley here. [raises voice even louder] It is definitely second-rate garbage. Now, by next week I want to see a better class of garbage: more empty champagne bottles and caviar cans! I'm sure you're all behind me on this. So let's snap it up and get on the ball!”

Another great quote from 1,000 Clowns:

“Five months ago I was on the subway on my way to work, was sitting on the express same as every morning looking out the window watching the local stops go by in the dark with an empty head and my arms folded, not feeling great, not feeling rotten, just not feeling. And for a minute I couldn't remember, I didn't know, unless I really concentrated, whether it was a Tuesday or a Thursday or a... for a minute it could have been any day. I gotta know what day it is. I gotta know what's the name of the game and what the rules are without anyone else telling me. You gotta own your own days and name 'em, each one of 'em, every one of 'em, or else the years go right by and none of them belong to you. And that ain't just for weekends, kiddo.”

I am a big fan of anything written by Tennessee Williams... including a recent discovery -- a 1962 film based on Tennessee Williams' play "Period of Adjustment". This gem of a movie starred a very young, sweet, and feminine Jane Fonda! Delightful! I loved the movie before I even knew it was written by T. Williams! My favorite TW plays: Hey, why list them? I love them all!

And I'm starting to have a huge appreciation for the works of Ingmar Bergman. I was recently fascinated by his 1960 film, "The Virgin Spring".

Sergio Leone's "Man With No Name Trilogy" starring Clint Eastwood:

........."A Fistful of Dollars" (1964) ........."For a Few Dollars More" (1965) ........."The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly" (1966)

All three released in the U.S. in 1967

The critically acclaimed "The Danish Girl" (2015) had a very strong impact on me.

August 4, 2019 Update: I can't believe I omitted one of the best movies I've ever seen: From 1957, "Twelve Angry Men". 95% of this movie is set in a small, hot jury room with no air conditioning. They are all trying to reach a verdict in a murder trial. A brilliant film with lots of big names in the cast, this movie received a very rare 100% rating on the Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer. It has also been performed on stage, although I haven't seen the play. Hopefully, I'll get to see it one day soon.

Oddly, I had never seen "Gone With the Wind" in it's entirety until July 2019. Many consider this one of the best movies of all time. My opinion: Yes, I liked it but it doesn't make my top ten list.

Nancy Kwan--the beautiful Eurasian actress who made a big splash in the early 1960's with "The World of Suzy Wong" and "Flower Drum Song"-- mesmerized me when I was about 12 years old, and continues to mesmerize me to this day. Oh, the way she wore those beautiful silk Chinese Dresses -- I now know that those dresses are called "cheongsams". So if you are Asian, Asian American, or of any other heritage and you like to wear the cheongsam, please "go to the front of the line"--you will mesmerize me just as Nancy has done for all these years and have me eating out of the palm of your hand 😊. Nancy was exquisite in her performance of "I Enjoy Being a Girl" and I'm sure you will enjoy this wonderful number:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8JigBfoDtzY

I have been a regular SNL (Saturday Night Live) viewer since day one (1975). In 1982 I bought my fist VCR (remember VCR's? :-) solely for the purpose of recording SNL. It's hard to believe that a "great deal" on a VCR in those days was $549 -- which is what I paid for a VCR that could only be programmed to record one show. And it had a WIRED remote. Today, if you can even FIND a VCR for sale new, it would cost you around $19.95

Music: I have a large and eclectic collection on my smart-phone. I'd be happy to send you a list of those songs to give you an idea of the music I like to listen to. One thought that seems to come up regularly is how certain bands kind of "Jump the Shark". Bands that were in my opinion, once really good but in an effort to become more mainstream, they lose what once made them stand out.

When I listen to some of the early songs of the band "Chicago" or as they were originally referred to, "The Chicago Transit Authority" circa 1968-71) I can't believe how much better they were when compared to the mid 1970's and beyond Chicago. The later version just got kind of sappy and boring whereas the earlier stuff just had more grit and edge. For example, compare "25 or 6 to Four" and "I'm a Man" (the long versions) to "Saturday In the Park" or "If you Leave Me Now".

Similarly, the Doobie Brothers lost their edge when Michael McDonald came in and, in my opinion ruined them!

Rod Stewart underwent a ridiculous (and sad) transformation when he started singing songs from the 1930's and 1940's. Really? Rod Stewart, the rocker? Singing "It Had to Be You" ??! I don't think Mick Jagger would ever sink this low! Just my humble opinion though. Feel free to disagree!

I'm not a huge fan of "The Grateful Dead" -- I like them I suppose in small doses. But one thing about "The Dead" as their big fans call them, is that they never "sold out" by trying to appeal to the masses and altering their style. I really respect that about this group.

Occasionally I make huge errors in assessing new talent. I'm kind of embarrassed to admit this, but regarding the singers Sheryl Crow and Taylor Swift, I remember when they first started, my thoughts were that they were just a "flash in the pan" and couldn't possibly have any long term success and significance in the music world.

Wow, did I blow the call on those two. They are now very high on my list of singers/songwriters and I couldn't have been more wrong about them.

Conversely, for some newcomers I predict huge things and they end up just being mediocre or their shelf life expires very rapidly. When "Jewel" first arrived on the scene, I fell in love with her work, and yes she did have some early success, but she never became a mega-star.

Fiona Apple was (and continues to be) an extremely talented singer/songwriter and I was infatuated with her from the start, but (maybe by her own choice?), she has stayed out of the limelight and never hit the heights that I predicted for her.

Sports: My interest in sports over the years has fluctuated. There was a time when I wasn't even aware of who was playing in the Super Bowl or World Series. During the past ten years though, I've returned to watching sports and I attribute this entirely to the DVR. Watching sports that are not recorded or delayed is so tedious with all the commercials. and down time. When I record them I watch only what I want to watch, zipping through the commercials and other non essential airtime.

Which sports? Football (college is better than pro!), Baseball (usually just the post season playoffs though), Basketball (March Madness NCAA Tournament only -- I'm slowly warming up to NBA Basketball), Ice Hockey (my interest grows as the Stanley Cup Playoffs start-- and YES!! THE CAPS WON THE 2018 STANLEY CUP FOR THE FIST TIME IN THEIR 44 YEAR EXISTENCE!!), and Horse Racing -- only during May and June when the Triple Crown Races are held. I love women's figure skating--these girls are awesome!

And I WISH we had professional women's fast pitch softball. A few years ago, they tried to form a professional women's' softball league, but it folded, due to lack of support by the public. It's a shame, because these girls are so talented, and in many ways their game takes more skill than professional baseball. And to add insult to injury, women's' softball was discontinued from the Summer Olympics, presumably due to the U.S. Team's domination of the sport. BUT... I understand they're bringing Softball BACK TO THE OLYMPICS!! And I'm sure the U.S. will put a spectacular team together for Tokyo 2020!! Can't wait!

The National Spelling Bee! On ESPN! Yes, spelling is now a televised sport!

And finally, the annual Nathan's annual Fourth of July Hot Dog Eating Contest (although many would not consider competitive eating a sport! 😊) On the 4th of July 2018 once again, Joey Chestnut ruled! He ate 74 HDB (that's hot dog and bun for all you competitive eating neophytes) in ten minutes to beat his previous record of 72 and win the 2018 contest easily---leaving his 17 competitors in a cloud of dust!

I often think about...

Personal Goals such as:

★Traveling and vacationing more, either with that special someone or with one or more platonic friends. I've taken several vacations by myself and and have come to realize that vacationing alone is not for me.

★Relocating to a warmer climate after nearly 30 years in DC. The winter of 2014-15) was particularly harsh and made me give the idea of relocating a lot more thought. The winter of 2015-16 has been unusually warm, but as I write this update (January 23,. 2016) there is about 15 inches of snow on the ground with a good chance of about 10 more inches by the day's end. And as I write THIS update (July 14, 2016), we're expecting temperatures in the mid 90's with a heat index of 104. Where would I want to move? Maybe MIAMI, Florida (SoFi --South of 5th South Beach), KEY WEST, NEW ORLEANS, Louisiana, HILTON HEAD South Carolina, SAN ANTONIO; AUSTIN, Texas, PHOENIX, Arizona, SAN DIEGO; LOS ANGELES /SANTA MONICA, California, or HONOLULU, Hawaii to name a few. I'd like to make some good friends from these cities and through them, get to know what it would be like to live there. I would welcome the opportunity to meet someone who may not be interested in me romantically, but has a similar desire to relocate to a warmer climate. Kind of a platonic partnership with the goal of starting a new, exciting and adventuresome chapter in life, in another part of the country. I think a move like this is much less traumatic, less anxiety inducing, and more fun if there are two of us facing similar challenges -- and there will no doubt be challenges! I'd even consider a move to another country. At this stage in my life, now is not the time to be skittish!

★Enhancing my circle of friends and acquaintances.

★Enriching my life and that of others' through volunteering and more acts of kindness.

★Rollerblading and ice skating. Although I'm much more comfortable and proficient on hockey skates, I have a fascination with "Ice Dancing" and have always fantasized about gliding effortlessly across the ice with a beautiful female skater. In ice dancing and ballroom dancing, "the man is the frame, and the woman is the picture"... meaning that it's the man's job to showcase the beauty and elegance of the woman. I realize that this ice dancing notion will probably will remain just a fantasy, but I do have figure skates and would love to sharpen them up and partner with a woman who also likes ice dancing, even if it is at the most basic level.

★ I also want to swim with dolphins, and as a result of *finally* seeing "Lawrence of Arabia" in it's entirety, I'd like to ride a camel! Also, I can't imagine life being complete without at least once seeing the live Mermaid show at Weeki Wachee Springs, FL😊 ===>

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HZymMONi1XA

★Being more active in striking up conversations with people I encounter. I've found that people in the DC area are generally hesitant or uninterested in chatting with someone they don't know, or someone that they perceive to have no value in the furtherance of their professional or personal goals. As such, I have over the years and for the most part, avoided initiating conversations with people I don't know. I've decided to be more outgoing in this area, recognizing that only a few will respond favorably, and not worrying about the "rejections". I also think about...

★I'm not sure why it's taken me so long to realize this, but relationships involve: A LOT OF WORK (better to realize this late than never!). There are rich rewards, but unless one is willing to (a) admit that there's hard work involved, and (b) actually do the work when it becomes necessary, the relationship is likely to fail. I think one of the main reasons I've remained single for so long is that I had this fantasy notion that successful relationships were all wine and roses, and when things went wrong, I came to the conclusion that it just wasn't working and decided to end it. How twisted is that logic?! The bliss of a new relationship fades pretty quickly, and that's when working at the relationship comes into play. Think of a garden or lawn that has not had any special attention -- no watering, no fertilizer, no nothing. It wouldn't be lush and green, nor would it have beautiful, colorful flowers. Take that same garden or lawn... water it, feed it, weed it, trim it, mow it... and the result is a beautiful sight. ~But it took a lot of work~! If I ever enter another serious relationship, it will be with the clear understanding that the real rewards come with overcoming obstacles and resolving conflict while remaining 100% committed to the relationship. But in keeping with the theme of this profile -- total honesty --after living single for all these years, it will be a hell of an adjustment to live with someone else. Hopefully, patience, love and acceptance will prevail and the gradual adjustment to a new (and exciting!) lifestyle will occur. And I REFUSE to enter a relationship that is without extreme effort or care.

★Have you ever heard of people who are married but live in different cities? That kind of arrangement for some reason intrigues me. The couple has the benefits of marriage but they enjoy freedom and independence when they're not together. And the potential for little squabbles is diminished because they're not constantly together. Obviously, this is not for most people, but given the right couple and the right circumstances it could result in a very diverse and fulfilling lifestyle. Plus it would make the time spent together more special, and they would have the benefit of enjoying two cities on a regular basis. So if you know a couple who has this kind of lifestyle, or if this is something that you think about, I'd love to have a discussion on this subject.

A variation of the "married but live in different cities" could be a partnering with little or no romance or intimacy -- basically roommates, but with a deep caring and commitment to enrich each others' lives. Best friends to give each other emotional support, without the trappings of traditional marriage. Independence and freedom from always having to answer to each other -- i.e. "Where are you going?" "When will you be back?" "Who were you with?" I really don't know how or even if this could work, but my gut feeling tells me that it could indeed work. And although I wouldn't count on this happening, it is entirely possible that the emotional support and caring could actually grow into a love that would be stronger than if it were to have begun in the traditional manner. I would have to give this type of arrangement a lot of thought, but with the right person, it could be a very rewarding and broadening experience.

There is another huge benefit of this arrangement, and I'm wondering why more people don't take advantage of it. It goes something like this: You are comfortable financially like me. You own your home -- a nice home, but nothing extravagant or opulent. Let's say we both own homes worth about $500,000. Being a couple -- either a traditional couple or a non-traditional couple (see previous paragraph) would effectively allow us to live in a home worth $1,000,000. Granted, in today's real estate market a million dollar home to some people would be low end, but to someone who has a history of living in a modest home, that kind of arrangement would allow a couple to live their later years (let's face it, it's coming whether we want it to or not) in a location and style that is a definite step up. I'm thinking Georgetown or Old Town, perhaps with a river view. Maybe this is just fantasy, but I really think it could improve our lives significantly. Again, if you have any thoughts on this, I’d like to hear them.  Even if you think this is an insane idea fraught with problems, which it very well could be.

★ This one, well it's kind of scary and depressing. I think many (over age 50) single people struggle with the anxiety of being old -- really old-- and having no one. I try not to think about this one too much, but the fact remains that being old is difficult even with that special someone. Being old and all alone is frightening. This shouldn't be the only reason for wanting a significant other, but as time goes on, it becomes more important and is definitely something to think about.

January, 2019 update: More and more, I've thought about finding a significant other for the sole purpose of having a support partner for the golden years. Romance and intimacy wouldn't be necessary -- just good friends who care about each other provide comfort and companionship. And although I STILL have not made a Will, I would like to have that special someone to inherit my estate, which is by no means extremely large, but is not a pittance either. I make this comment with the full realization that anyone with ill intentions who has seen an Alfred Hitchcock movie or tv show, may try to form a relationship, get me to name them as beneficiary, and proceed to knock me on the head with a frozen leg of lamb (great episode -- "Lamb to the Slaughter", 1958 --find it on YouTube if you haven't seen it!), thus reaping the financial rewards as a "grieving" widow or significant other. :-) Other cinematic ideas for knocking off a "loved one" -- "Double Indemnity" (1944), "The Postman Always Rings Twice" (1946), "Dial M for Murder" (1954), "Vertigo" (1958) and "A Place in the Sun" (1951). :-) But remember, none of the murderers got away with it! :-)

★I don't know if it's just me or if this happens to a lot of people: The older I get, the more thoughts of occurrences from the past just pop into my head -- completely unexpected and seemingly without any type of trigger. And the unsettling aspect of this is that these thoughts of past events involve me in a situation that I mishandled in some way, and make me respond..."what were you thinking??" Often it's something that I did, but shouldn't have done....something I said that I shouldn't have said... or, something I didn't say but should have, or something I didn't do, but should have. Is this our way of reminding us that we have matured and our stupid and reckless ways of the past are now behind us?

These thoughts always focus on things I'd like to take back and have a "do over" or in the golfing vernacular, a "mulligan". And what's interesting is that I never get random thoughts about things I did well or things that I'm proud of. So I'm asking you... does this happen to you? Or if you're familiar with this type of thing, is it something that all of us (or most of us) experience? I'd be very interested in knowing more about this.

★How I've never really embraced hanging out with the guys. Recently, after a vigorous workout on my blades, I stopped at one of Old Town's riverside parks. I found a vacant picnic table, under a tree, with a cool breeze and a lovely view of the Potomac River, the Wilson Bridge, and the new Capitol Wheel across the river at National Harbor. What could be more relaxing and serene? Well, about five minutes after I settled in, here come four men in their 40's, 50's and maybe 60's... all standing around about to do some, I don't know... male bonding? Guy stuff? And then, not one, not two, not three, but all four.... light up these big fat smelly cigars and my blissful, relaxing scene is ruined. Well, I did get about five minutes sheer joy, but it left me thinking... "would I like to be one of those guys... standing around with their guts protruding over their belts of their khaki pants...smoking cigars? I also thought about their poor wives and/or girlfriends who would have to endure the foul, lingering odor of a cigar. I can't even imagine getting the slightest enjoyment from being part of that group. Of course, this is no great revelation-- I've never gotten warm and fuzzy feelings bonding with guys, and this is just one of the many things that reinforce the notion that I'm very different from most guys.

Hanging out with the girls is more exciting and invigorating, providing better quality, more supportive conversation in an "odor free" location! Well, this musing could go on and on, but the point I want to make (and I'm sure you've figured it out by now if you've read this far!) is that I'm not like most guys.

★Even though I generally speak of being attracted to women, a lot of people ask if I'm gay-- a fair and logical question. I've often wondered if I'm really gay and just refuse to admit this to myself. Then I think, hey, if I'm really gay, wouldn't I have *at least once* tried, or experimented with intimate relations with a man? The answer of course is no, I have not -- because it's something that just doesn't interest me. I think my brain is just hard-wired to be attracted to, surrounded by,  and infatuated by, feminine beauty. I have, over the years had a number of male admirers who have tried to persuade me to be their girlfriend, but it's very clear to me that women offer so much more mental and physical stimulation.

Now, having said all that, I do find it interesting and exciting to have a girls night out -- with one or more genetic girls-- and have interested guys buy us drinks, hit on us, and to be one of the girls talking about how hot this guy or how wonderful the new guy that they're dating is. Women receiving the attention of men, in my opinion, enhances feminine feelings.   I know--I know...this has all the earmarks of a gay mindset, but when it really comes down to being intimate with a man, reality sets in and there is no interest.

★I see guys wearing pink shirts all the time. I also see a lot of pink ties. Apparently, pink shirts and ties are ok for guys, but pink pants? I've got these great American Apparel Riding Pants that are, pink (actually, more of a coral), but wow you wouldn't believe the looks I get. Occasionally, I'll even see looks of disgust while shaking their head as if they're saying no. Often I'll see people just staring at my pants -- in line at the grocery store, at the airport, anywhere. One girl recently, in a kind of mocking tone said, "I like your leggings". And my response was, "why should girls have all the fun?!😊" The more I wear them, the more I'm amused at people's reactions, yet the guy in the pink shirt and pink tie with one or more earrings doesn't even get noticed. By the way, the American Apparel riding pants are the most comfortable pants I have ever worn, and I highly recommend that you give them a try. I have them in black, khaki, grey, safari brown, purple, yellow, navy, and --gasp!-- pink! Just google American Apparel Riding pants. American Apparel discontinued them recently (why I don't know because they were wildly popular!) and I've picked up a few new or lightly used pairs on ebay. AA also makes what they call "Disco Pants"-- super stretchy, and form fitting and so comfortable! Just google "American Apparel Riding Pants" or "American Apparel Disco Pants" and you'll see some wonderful pictures. I think they look great on all women XXS to XL.

Many of my other pants are very skinny, stretchy, and feature fun prints and colors -- very comfortable! I often wonder why "the norm" for guys includes pants that lack any distinctive or interesting characteristics, i.e. boring, dull, and frumpy -- as described in the State Farm Commercial featuring one of the Coneheads (Beldar) explaining to his wife (Prymaat) what khakis are: "khakis : a dull earthly garment covering male extremities". 😊 By the way, who determines what's acceptable fashion and what's not? During Breast Cancer awareness month, it's ok for men to wear pink, especially in the NFL where tough macho guys are wearing pink socks, wristbands, and even shoes. So it's SOMETIMES ok for a man to wear pink. Also, you'll occasionally see some bright and colorful pants on the golf course---there is a company called "Loudmouth Golf" that makes some really cool pants, and they're quite popular---BUT ONLY ON THE GOLF COURSE. On the golf course they're ok, but wear them to the movies or the grocery store and be ready for those puzzled, surprised, and sometimes disgusted looks from others.

In earlier times, if a man wore earrings, he would be ridiculed and presumed gay. At some point though, it became ok for a man to wear earrings and now they don't get a second look. Even Jim Vance, the NBC 4 Newsguy who I really admired and respected, wore an earring when he delivered the news. Sadly, Jim passed away on July 22, 2017.

Another example would be women and tattoos. Not too long ago, if a woman had a tattoo, she was considered to be "trailer trash" or "from the wrong side of the tracks". Then it became not only ok, but extremely fashionable to have a tattoo or multiple tattoos. What brought about the change? I suppose all it takes is a celebrity such as Angelina Jolie (tattoos) and Madonna (wearing lingerie as outer wear). But I guess it's going to take more time before Lady Gaga's dress made from meat??! gains a foothold! :-)

If you follow "baseball cap fashion", you'll know that the "flat bill" has become more popular than the traditional "curved bill". In earlier times, if someone wore a flat bill, they were immediately considered uncool and nerdy. Then, I don't know, someone famous -- I believe a rapper like "50 cent" wore his flat billed cap, and it soon became cool and street-wise to wear it that way. The curved bill became popular in the first place as a more effective way of protecting ones eyes from the glare of the sun, but now it's only used by those who cling to the old school ways. In fact, I was in a baseball cap store in Georgetown recently and I saw nothing but flat bills. I asked the guy working there if they had curved bills and he pulled out a few small boxes, opened them up and showed them to me. They weren't even on display!

And remember polo shirts in the 80's? Someone somewhere decided that he/she would turn the collar up, (maybe to protect the neck from the sun) and a new trend started. That style has faded, but occasionally you see older people wearing their polo shirts with upturned collars (maybe they think it's still in style!), and even some younger ones who are going for that retro-look.

Pantyhose vs. bare legs? Same thing -- you used to never see bare legs, now that's pretty much all you see, especially on the west coast. Well, the list goes on and on, but my point is that I have no desire to follow any kind of "acceptable" fashion guidelines, although I think it's interesting how some things become "appropriate" and others remain "inappropriate".

★One of the things that I've noticed over my years of "people watching", is that most girls do not know how to walk in heels. I think it's so beautiful to see a poised and confident woman, gracefully and sensuously walking in a sexy and elegant pair of heels. Unfortunately, this sight is so uncommon that when I do see it, I'm totally mesmerized. I know a former professional ballet dancer who, when walking in heels, is so confident and so graceful, that she never fails to turn heads. If there ever was a fitting real life example of "poetry in motion", this girl when walking in heels, regardless of the height -- 2" or 5" -- would be it. There are of course, varying degrees of walking in heels the wrong way. Some make me think that only a few small adjustments are necessary, while others are embarrassingly awkward and need a lot of help. I often wonder if women as a general rule, do the homework necessary to learn what it takes to walk in heels, and practice those techniques to perfect their walk. My guess is that most do not.

In reality though, I am by no means one of those perfect walkers, and I could benefit from some practice myself. When I do see one of those rare, elegant walkers, I make mental notes and try to incorporate their techniques into my walk. It's amazing what just a little work in this area does for poise, confidence, and allure. Maybe you'd like to get together (as platonic friends if you're not interested in a serious relationship) for some high heel practice sessions!

The designer John Galliano once said, "Style is wearing an evening dress to McDonald's, wearing heels to play football. It is personality, confidence and seduction." And a quote from Sophia Loren😍: "Nothing makes a woman more beautiful than the belief that she is beautiful." I believe there's a lot to these statements. This is why so many girls who may not have those drop dead gorgeous looks come across as sexy and desirable--they have CONFIDENCE, POISE and STYLE!

So come on girls-- (head held high, shoulders back!) go online and watch some YouTube videos about the proper way to walk in heels, develop some subtle but mesmerizing body language, and most of all, be aware of your walk, know the effect it has on people, and work at it to continuously improve! The increased confidence and poise will benefit your love life, your health and flexibility, and your professional life.

★I've visited many "erotic websites" featuring beautiful and sexy women (any man who says he hasn't done this is lying!). One thing I've noticed, is that many of the models pose for the pictures using a facial expression that is supposed to be sexy. The best way to describe this is that they look like they are either in pain, bored, angry, or uncomfortable. You know that look--head held back, mouth slightly open, eyes halfway closed. I don't know whether the photographer tells them to look sexy and this is the expression they use-- or the photographer describes the exact look he/she wants. Or some of the models might have this blank, mannequin like stare. To me, these expressions are not nearly as sexy as a woman posing for a picture with a nice, natural smile. These smiling girls are sending the message to the viewer that they are confident, warm, and fun.

Confidence, warmth, and fun are VERY sexy! And if they are not smiling, they are looking into the camera again, exuding confidence and self assuredness and basically saying "I know I'm beautiful, sexy and intelligent, and I love being a woman". And even though I love to watch fashion shows (Remember CNN's "Style" with Elsa Klensch? My Saturday morning wasn't complete without watching it!), the models usually had this bored, blank look on their face as they walked the runway. I would be thrilled if these fashion shows all featured models who smiled and looked like they were having fun!  But maybe there is a reason for the fashion models to have that bored look. Perhaps the designer is saying, "I don't want people to look at the models face, I want them to look at the clothes!" That may be true, but a smiling, fun loving and playful model makes an outfit much more beautiful and sends the message, "wear this ensemble and you'll be fun and beautiful too!"

But back to the erotic website models-- I don't know, maybe they've done some type of study and the results show that most men find that painful, angry, or bored look to be sexy. And if that's the case, my preferences are just further proof that I'm not like most men!

★ Speaking of posing for a photograph, and at the risk of offending many people, I have to say that taking a picture of oneself (a selfie), while standing in front of a mirror awkwardly holding a cell phone is not very natural or attractive. I know, lots of people do it, but to me, this sends a message of, "I have no friends to take a picture of me, or I have no activities to engage in while being photographed, so I'll just stand in my bathroom and take a picture of myself." Part of what makes a good picture is the feeling that the subject is enjoying himself/herself. How fun can standing there by oneself be? And again, I'm probably offending many, but the ultimate mistake is using one of these pictures for a *profile picture!*

Surely there are events and activities at which to be photographed, and surely there are friends, relatives, co-workers, or even strangers who will gladly take your picture if you ask (and stop calling me Shirley!) :-).....June 4, 2017 update: Wow, I've gotten a lot of messages expressing strong disagreement with my views on this subject. But I'm holding firm on my position that selfies are less attractive and less fun than traditional posed photos.

★Most people have at least one or two hobbies. The obvious benefits are stress reduction and numerous other health benefits. Hobbies give us a fun diversion from everyday life and the sense of satisfaction from engaging in something one loves to do. Some like to go fishing, tend to the garden, collect stamps--mine just happens to be cross dressing and gender bending.  One of my cross dresser friends put it this way: "Some men play golf. I play girl!"

My life choices give me the opportunity to step outside the everyday persona and become someone different, even if just for one night. I think that's why so many adults love Halloween (I'm one of them!).

I know one guy who is extremely passionate about participating in Civil War reenactments. He goes to several reenactments every year, wears authentic uniforms (thick wool -- very hot in the sweltering heat of the summer), carries authentic weaponry, and even eats the food that civil war soldiers ate --hardtack and corn pone. He absolutely loves it. Why? I suppose it's due to reasons similar to mine -- to create a diversion from everyday life and engage in one's passion.

But in my opinion, there is something a little unsettling about glorifying such a tragic event -- one in which over 600,000 people perished. Successful lawyers, accountants, auto mechanics, etc. -- pretending and fantasizing that they are going through the same physical and emotional trauma as the original soldiers. To me, it's not much different than "re-enacting" the 9/11 tragedies. I'm reasonably certain that if this were to be done, it would immediately be considered to be "poor taste". But I'm sure that the passage of time somehow softens the emotional impact, and using this logic, in about 100 years there may be people who have a passion for being a part of "9/11 re-enactments".

But...to each his or her own, so Civil War actors -- if this is your passion, go out and enjoy yourselves! And some people love to go to Star Wars or super hero conventions dressed to the nines as their favorite character. Why is this kind of activity generally considered harmless, creative fun, while my gender bending artistic endeavors are often met with scorn and ridicule, and often prompt speculation about mental and emotional stability? I recently received a message from a lovely girl from the Philippines, and I was stunned at the simple and logical outlook she had regarding my lifestyle.

Here's how she put it: ¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•✫ ..✫¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•.✫.....I never experience liking a man looking like a woman. But your an exception to that. I never saw you different or complicated. Just like any other. I saw you just like an amazing person who dedicates himself with his passion. Never saw you as a girl but a man who enjoys his passion and bravely does what his heart want him to do.if i love singing or cooking, you love cross dressing so whats wrong with that my sweet? Nothing right. :* do not except yourself with everyone. You belong with us and you deserve to be treated normal just like what every man deserves. But lemme tell you a secret okay? Even though i saw you as normal man. My heart beats specially telling me. Your really special. ❤ so because of that. Be ready to be treated special too. ¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•✫ ..✫¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•.✫

Another heartfelt message (which I have read over and over again for inspiration and confidence!) is: ¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•✫ ..✫¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•.✫"Reading your profile was such a rich experience that I wanted to compliment you and reinforce that you re a very special and unique person, one with so much depth, insight, awareness, honesty, thoughtfulness, compassion and wisdom. Your articulate blog drew me in completely, and I felt blessed to be fortunate enough to have you share your inner self, inner spirit, inner soul with me. I felt a warmth and tenderness that truly touched me. You are truly amazing, inside and out, and deserve to find your happiness, fulfillment and joy throughout your lifetime."¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•✫ ..✫¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•.✫

And my absolute favorite response to my profile comes from a beautiful woman (inner and outer beauty!) in Romania and she writes:

¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•✫ ..✫¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•.✫¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•✫ ¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•✫ •°*”˜˜”*°•✫ ¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•✫ It took me almost two hours to read your entire profile. I had to look for the explanation of some words or expressions, being an excellent exercise in improving my English and at the same time a fascinating immersion in understanding a person as complex as you are. It is the most powerful, captivating, complex and honest profile I have ever read. I never thought I could. read something like this on OKC. I am still amazed by your clear, logical, profound and so colorful style of expression You are a very special person, so different from what I'm used to know but so human and profound in a way that few people can be. ¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•✫ ..✫¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•.✫¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•✫ ¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•✫ •°*”˜˜”*°•✫ ¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•✫

★ A lot of people ask me how and when I developed an interest in cross dressing and gender bending. I'm not exactly sure, maybe it's an innate characteristic, or maybe a particular incident or experience created a spark and my creative imagination just ran with it. I do recall at about age five becoming mesmerized with these beautiful cocktail glasses emblazoned with the stunning women painted by the artist Alberto Vargas. Vargas' style by the way, has been copied by many, but no one really comes close. If you're curious about his work, simply google "Alberto Vargas" and you'll see some of the images that I believe created the spark that lit the fire, giving me this lifelong fascination.

Countless television viewing experiences added fuel to the fire, so to speak. Remember Ginger from "Gilligan's Island"? I was captivated by her beauty and elegance -- evening gowns and high heels while stranded on a deserted island walking through the sand! 😊 And a series of old commercials for "Muriel Cigars" starring Edie Adams (who incidentally bore a resemblance to Ginger (or was it Ginger who resembled Edie? 😊) View these fun and sexy commercials on YouTube, if you like. There was a lot of sexual innuendo and double entendre in these commercials, but it all went over the head of a young and mesmerized viewer.

I could list dozens more, but the gist of all this is that strong visual stimulation, a passion for feminine beauty and elegance, combined with an active and creative imagination, set the stage for a life-long appreciation and admiration of feminine beauty.

★Another question I get fairly often is, "Do you ever think about transitioning to being female 24/7, ala Bruce/Caitlyn Jenner and thousands of others? I've often wondered about it, but so far I've had no desire or motivation to go down that road. Some transgendered people have a burning desire to present as who they are inside-- 24/7. For them, there is just no other way to survive.

Other transgendered people (like me), find pleasure in both their masculine and feminine sides and as such have neither the need nor the desire to make the transition to 24/7. In fact, I believe that being "gender fluid" makes me appreciate both my male and femme sides even more. April 30, 2018 update: I just finished Caitlyn Jenner's book, "The Secrets of My Life". I wanted to read it to compare my lifelong thoughts of being transgendered to those of CJ. Although I never won an Olympic Gold Medal, many, many aspects of our lives and inner thoughts are eerily similar. I highly recommend this book (which is an easy and entertaining read) for anyone who has an interest in knowing about the myriad of difficult challenges and coping solutions that transgendered people typically face.

I also read "Becoming Nicole" -- a New York Times best seller about a family with identical twin boys -- one of whom is transgendered, and the other being a "normal" boy. One of the key concepts of this story is how the brain becomes "masculinized" or "feminized" ~~while still in the womb~~. Sexual anatomy is determined approximately six weeks into the pregnancy, however the brain does not "masculinize" or "feminize" until six ~~months~~ ... and can be very different even in the case of identical twins. This is another great story of courage and perseverance -- not only for Nicole, but for her entire family.

And I recently came across a brief, but very interesting and informative essay titled, "The Psychology of Cross-Dressing". A couple of high impact quotes from this article:

**...”But in truth, cross-dressing is grounded in a highly logical and universal desire: the wish to be, for a time, the gender one admires, is excited by – and perhaps loves. Dressing like a woman is merely a dramatic, yet essentially reasonable, way of getting closer to the experiences of the sex one is profoundly curious about – and yet has been (somewhat arbitrarily) barred from... “

and

**”It may be bewildering to have to accept that one is at heart, in the semi-conscious mind, always going to be something far more diverse, multi-faceted but also perhaps interesting than a mere ‘man’ or a ‘woman’** If you'd like to read the entire essay, it can be found at:

https://www.theschooloflife.com/thebookoflife/the-psychology-of-cross-dressing/

As I mentioned early in the blog, for me, this has always been a fun, creative, and artistic expression of feminine beauty which I enjoy very much. But do I feel like a "woman trapped in a man's body"? I guess the answer is sometimes yes, and sometimes no. Which supports my theory that some transgendered people find pleasure and comfort by embracing certain aspects of both genders.

Only lately have I taken the time to look into the pros and cons of hormone treatments which most consider to be one of the first steps of transitioning from one gender to the other on a full time basis. One notion that surfaces over and over again -- when it comes to genetic males taking female hormones -- is that they feel more relaxed and have more inner peace. It has also been reported that this more relaxed feeling allows them to connect with people on a deeper, more meaningful level. Now I'm not going to rush out and start taking female hormones, but experiencing those feelings that are generally attributed to females is something that intrigues me.

One other thing that I have heard trans women describe as a result of hormone treatments is that their senses are heightened. Colors are brighter and scents are stronger. It is almost as if one's senses are somehow altered or enhanced. Again, very intriguing. Buuuuut... a HUGE DRAWBACK of hormone treatments is often (usually) a diminished sexual response ("E.D. to be specific) and THAT -- is something that will most likely keep me from venturing into those waters!

I have a lot of respect for the transgender people who "go all the way" because it is undeniably a difficult road to travel. Only a few transsexuals who were born male have features and outward physical characteristics that allow them to blend in with other genetic women without being scrutinized. And that's why I have so much respect for people like Caitlyn Jenner because, no matter how much surgery or how many hormones she takes, she will still have many physical characteristics typically associated with non-genetic women. That takes A LOT OF COURAGE and presents so many challenges in life.

★ It is entirely possible that the the “normal” khaki wearing, briefcase toting guy you see every day has a secret desire to cross dress or feel feminine, but doesn't dare tell anyone about it. It's much more common than you might think. I feel bad for the guys who are 100% in the closet because their femme side is locked up and hidden away, and they struggle to keep their secret, terrified that their wives or girlfriends will discover that they have these feelings.

Often, they try to overcompensate by being excessively macho and manly. I know one cross dresser whose wife knows, but totally disapproves. He told me that at one point, he secretly rented space in a storage facility so he could have some "girl time". A damp and dimly lit storage facility?? How lonely and depressing is that!? While it is true that when going out en femme, the venue has to be considered, (some places, unfortunately are not "TG friendly") but at least I'm not locked up in a storage facility trying on dresses and heels! I hope the storage facility guy eventually gains a little more freedom.

I decided long ago that if I was going to be married or have a serious relationship, it would be with a woman who not only knew about my femme side, but enjoyed and appreciated it also.

★You'll no doubt agree that this blog seems to be a bottomless pit.  There's a reason for such extensive expression.  I want people to know as much about me, without concealing anything. Think about all those people who write a few paragraphs (or in some cases, just a few words!) in a dating profile about who they are and what they want in a significant other. Are they really letting you look into their deepest, most private thoughts? Or are they just giving you the information they think you might want to hear?

I have a friend who met a guy, and married him about a year later. Shortly after they married, he expressed a desire for her to look and act like a little girl as a sexual stimulant for him. I have no problem with role play as an enhancement to sexual matters. Actually, I think it's quite healthy and creative. For this guy however, the "little girl fantasy" was the be all and end all and my friend quickly realized that something didn't sit right with her. Now, without knowing the intricate details of the marriage, I can't say for sure how the marriage ended, but it did. And after talking with my friend, I learned that his fixation was a primary factor. Why do I relate this story in my profile?

Well, this guy and the unfortunate girl could have saved a lot of heartache had he been up front with her before they were married. If he had told her all about this part of him that seemed to fixate on his adult wife looking and acting like an 8 year old for his sexual pleasure-- she could have made an informed decision about whether she could or couldn't live with his fetish. She most likely wouldn't have married him and she could have been free to pursue they type of relationship she wanted, and he could have been free to look for a woman who didn't have a problem with his desires.

To my knowledge, he wasn't into child pornography -- he just wanted his wife to "act the part". And that brings me back to my situation. I'm fully aware that most women would not be interested in pursuing a relationship with me. But I'm up front about myself and I would never want to string someone along, and then suddenly reveal a very different side of myself. Doing so would be extremely selfish and detrimental to the relationship, to say the least. What you have from me -- from the start -- is complete openness with nothing concealed. I wonder how many dating site profiles go to such great lengths.

★ I often wonder why, when a little girl shows an interest in things like toy trucks, or football, the parents rarely discourage her from being interested in these things. In fact, they often encourage her to experience things that are traditionally feminine AND traditionally masculine. When young boys express interest in traditionally feminine things -- Barbie Dolls, princess dresses, etc., -- there is usually A LOT OF CONCERN and disappointment that he's not a "normal boy".

Is it that we all have a subconscious notion that masculine is "strong, good, and positive" and feminine is weak? Not that long ago -- sadly -- many white people really did think (some consciously, some subconsciously ) that black people were born with an inferior intellect. At one time, there were no black quarterbacks in the NFL and even though it was rarely discussed, everyone knew that the reason was the notion that black players were not smart enough to be a quarterback. Fortunately we have evolved and that kind of thinking is, for the most part, extinct.

I wonder if that feminine/masculine thinking for our children will continue through the ages, or will it evolve into a broader, more logical and humane way of thinking. If you'd like to see an amazing video of how a father responds -- in a very positive way-- to his son's apparent feminine interests, check out:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWlsMulh3MY

★ I recently came across a YouTube channel called "Fabricio Castro Fotografia". I suppose I could write pages about this, but I'll keep it brief and if you're interested you can check out his channel. He has a team of photographers, makeup artists, and hairstylists that do an amazing job of transforming teenage boys into beautiful young women. What's really amazing is that the parents of these boys are ~~very supportive and encouraging~~. And they pay Mr. Castro a lot of money for his services.

Very often, the transformation is done for a big party -- very popular among the Hispanic community is the "Quinceañera" party -- the 15th Birthday. After their transformations, they become very feminine and beautiful girls in their formal gowns. They are also coached on feminine walking, mannerisms, etc. But the true beauty of all of this is the look of total joy, happiness, and contentment as they become "girls for a day". I can tell that, in the majority of cases, it's not just a curiosity on the part of these boys. They wouldn't go to all the trouble and expense if it was just a curiosity or a whim. And the parents most likely wouldn't support them unless they felt it was extremely important to their sons. They feel female on the inside and the look of content and inner peace that you see when they are transformed is very heartwarming.

I also can't help but to think that after their "girl for a day" they become a little depressed and disappointed that they have to return to being boys. But I also feel that the parents are fully aware that their child is transgendered, and this is very likely just the first step in ultimately transitioning to a full time female.

This is a perfect example of how societal views have changed regarding transgendered persons. When I was young, I ★wouldn't have dreamed★ of asking my parents to allow me to do this. And if I had asked them, it would have been met with scheduling appointments with a psychiatrist. Coming out as transgender during this time period would have resulted in so many negative outcomes, and unfortunately many transgendered children (who didn't even know what being transgendered was) became emotionally scarred and even suicide victims. I have so much respect and admiration for these modern day brave children and their progressive thinking parents.

★Finally, MMO, which is an acronym for "Male Multiple Orgasm". Although it may sound like an oxymoron, it is entirely possible for a male to develop this amazing ability which most people understand to be the sole province of women. It's not an easy thing to accomplish because most men are wired to achieve orgasm in the traditional manner. But armed with an open mind, patience and relaxation, many men can "re-wire" themselves and discover a whole new world of pleasure. There is a lot written on MMO, so if you're interested in knowing more, simply do an internet search on "male multiple orgasms" and you'll learn about some very interesting concepts.

★ I have not had sexual relations with a partner for a long time. This however, has in no way limited my sexual pleasure or diminished my sexual desire, as I have discovered and refined some amazing um, "solo techniques"😊 that have resulted in some earth shattering experiences. I've also done a lot of research regarding diet, exercise, and vitamin/herbal supplements to maximize sexual response. The results are astounding! But the most powerful and the most important sex organ? Without a doubt --the brain.

One very apparent result of my staying out of relationships for so long, is that I have been able to reflect on past relationships and recognize the things that I did (or didn't do) which acted to sabotage the development and progression of the relationship. Just about every sport at a professional level involves watching films of past performance. A tennis player might see a glaring flaw in his/her form which can then be corrected. A baseball hitter might take note that he is dropping his shoulder too much when swinging the bat and take steps to correct it.

Well, I don't have actual films, but for me the footage is in my head. And I have a lot of footage! If there is another serious relationship for me, I will (like the professional athlete) learn from the mistakes and take steps to make me a ~~much~~ better partner! I promised myself long ago, that I would not pursue or take part in meaningless or shallow sexual encounters. That is, sex without a ~~deep~~ emotional commitment. And I'm proud to say that I have kept that promise. I don't miss casual sex at all. In fact, I have a lot of regrets about being interested in certain women with only one goal (sex) in mind.

I wish I could talk to each one of them and apologize for my selfish and shallow behavior, and for wasting their time letting them think that there was potential for a more serious relationship when my intentions were entirely short-term, self centered, and shallow. On the other hand, perhaps many of these women were using me in the same way I was using them. In any event, it is now clear to me that these encounters were a waste of time and an impediment to the development of healthy emotional maturity.

One issue that came up several times in past relationships was my admiration of pretty women while out and about with the girl I was dating. It wasn't like, "...oooh, look at her, she's FINE!!" It was more like me just sneaking a glance and appreciating her beauty, style, elegance and fashion choices. But you know? --most women have this built in "radar" that immediately notifies them that their man is looking at and taking in the beauty of another woman. There was a funny commercial -- I can't even remember the product--I think it was Corona beer-- that shows a couple on the beach. A stunningly beautiful bikini-clad woman walks by and the guy just gawks at her, mouth agape. His wife/girlfriend, without even looking up from the book she's reading -- places her hand on the guy's chin and pushes it up to close his mouth. A perfect example of the "radar" I just described.

One girl I was dating always knew that I was stealing glances and she never failed to tell me, "I know you're looking at her" or something like that. And rather than apologize to her, I would defend my position and say, "yes, I was looking at her--that doesn't mean I want to date her. It's just human nature to look at and appreciate beauty." She didn't buy that excuse, and I think it was one of the main reasons that our relationship didn't last. Looking back on it, I now see how it made her feel and I'd like to apologize to her for the distress I caused her.

On the other hand, I'm really not sure if I'll ever be able to resist admiring all the feminine beauty that the world has to offer. So if I ever enter another serious relationship, I'll have to tell her these things and make sure she doesn't have a problem with it. I think that maybe, just maybe-- women who have a problem with their men looking at (not lusting) other women are somewhat insecure. A woman with confidence will view this behavior as a natural and harmless activity.  And by the same token, I'd never call her out for looking at other men (or women) because I understand that this is just part of being human. Why walk around with horse blinders on simply because a significant other is by one's side? I'd be interested in knowing if you agree or disagree with this.

This is a 30 year old secret that I have never revealed to anyone--until now: I saw "Dirty Dancing" -- paid to see it in the theater--not once but twice in one week! It's one of those things that should be filed in the "what was I thinking??" folder. I just remember how cute Jennifer Grey looked (before she got her nose "fixed"), and I remember how I liked the music, regardless of the fact that the movie was kind of schmaltzy. I don't think I've seen ANY movie twice in the theater. I've seen many movies multiple times, but none were seen more than once in the theater. I've probably seen "Jaws" 20 times, "Rocky Horror" at least 10 times, and "Blazing Saddles" about 10 times, "The Shawshank Redemption" about 10 times, "Dances With Wolves" about 10 times, "Double Indemnity" about 10 times, and the recently released "Frozen" about ten times! I still don't think I'll tell anyone (other than in this blog) the "Dirty Dancing" secret ...very embarrassing! 😊

This really isn't a private thing, but I'm kind of embarrassed to admit that I don't do text messaging or Facebook. I do have a smart phone-- A Samsung that's about six years old (ANCIENT in cell phone years!). But I don't use it as a cell phone. For me, it's a music player, video player, camera, video camera, address book, and occasional internet surfer -- everything except a phone! My phone is an even more ancient Motorola "flip phone" that can't even send or receive text messages -- it's only a phone. I got it on ebay for $15.00. I've lost it a few times and its has always made its way back to me, mainly, I suppose, because no one would want this phone and I guess the finders have all felt sorry for the "low-tech user" who owned it! 😊 If I lost a smart phone, I'd probably never see it again.

I’d love to have you contact me if perhaps: 

You think you're that special person  I'm looking for...

OR, if you just want to be friends....perhaps you have ZERO interest in my lifestyle that no doubt traverses a different path... but maybe you'd like a friend to cultivate some of your interests that coincide with some of mine ---rollerblading, ice skating, theater, travel, etc.

...you’re a TG girl like myself who would like a friend to hang out with, have dinner, go to a show, or go out dancing...Halloween is approaching -- are you interested?

...you'd like a friend for an impromptu visit to the nail salon for a pedicure followed by a fun outdoor (weather permitting) lunch!

...you're a beautiful lady with a lot of style and confidence and you love to get dressed to the nines for a night out at a restaurant of your choice. Just us two girls, oblivious to the gawkers and admirers that we know are checking us out. One night...no strings attached...we go our separate ways after I pay the tab (that's right, it's on me), and all we have is the memory of a lovely evening. It may appear to be a shallow experience, but who says everything in life needs to be deep and significant?

...you may not want to be tied down and you may not be interested in anything intimate or long term-- that's ok --just one unique experience for an evening. And if it leads to more nights out, all the better!

.....you are a fun and adventuresome couple. Many of my friends are couples, so if the two of you think you'd enjoy my company, I'd love to hear from you. I once was close to a couple who came to my home for dinner with me (dressed in my French Maid's Uniform) serving as their waitress. Afterwards, we went out for drinks and dancing.

...you're a straight woman who might be fascinated by the idea of having a lesbian relationship, but also enjoys the company of a man. In other words, ..."the best of both worlds!"

...you're attracted to my positive energy and creativity, but you want no part of my femme presentations. Ok, fair enough. Any time we spend together will be with me in male mode, recognizing of course that I cannot and will not suppress my femme side and I will continue to enjoy this part of me with friends who enjoy and embrace my femme side

...you're a lesbian or bi-sexual woman who would like a TG friend.

...you're an "aging baby boomer" (I cringe when I hear that term and you may cringe also -- if that's the case, my apologies!) who has previously been highly independent, but realizes that growing old (another cringe) will be more palatable with a partner who can provide emotional support and companionship. I seem to be in a state of denial about this issue, mainly because I think and feel like I'm light years away from "being old" but as sure as the sun will rise tomorrow, it (old age) will eventually be banging loudly on our doors.

...you are bride planning her wedding and (omg!) one of your best friends has backed out of her commitment to be one of your bridesmaids. Your problems are over because you've found me: I can step in and take her place as one of your beautiful bridesmaids!😊. I also love bachelorette parties and would be honored to be one of your girls!

...and speaking of weddings, maybe you're going to a wedding, family event, class reunion, or other social engagement and would like to make a BIG SPLASH by bringing a fun, fabulous TG girl as your date or platonic friend.

...you admit that you need some practice walking in heels and want a non-judgemental practice partner. Or maybe you want to go shoe shopping together!

...you are a man who is an admirer of transgender girls.  I always enjoy making new friends and it is always nice to be appreciated and respected by a gentleman. I know one guy who is not gay, but he is fascinated by the way I can transform myself into pretty and femme looks.

...you're a man who enjoys ballroom dancing and would like to either take lessons or just get out and dance with a transgendered partner. It's an interesting and intriguing idea...

But guys, listen up: Sending me a note saying only "Hi" or "ur sexy" or in one case, apparently it was too much work to write "Hi", he simply wrote "H" -- won't get a response from me.

And... if my quest for romance somehow fails to materialize, I would be interested in taking an alternative route briefly described as:

...If you are an elegant, stylish, chic, successful and confident woman and dominant (straight, lesbian, or bi) who has absolutely no interest in a romantic relationship (but are intrigued by my lifestyle, fashion choices and musings) and would like me in your life to help you with your busy professional and personal activities. I suppose what I'm describing is a personal assistant (or if you prefer to use the term "maid" please do so--there are some very cute maid's uniforms available that I would be happy to wear for you on those special occasions.😊. I am very attentive, and will give strong consideration to dedicating myself 100% to your happiness and pleasure, asking for nothing in return other than knowing and being in the presence of an elegant, successful, feminine, sophisticated, chic and intelligent lady. To me, giving happiness and pleasure is just as rewarding, if not more rewarding than getting. I am willing to relocate! I WILL make your life a lot more interesting!

✨THERE!! --- You made it though my labyrinth of a blog. CONGRATULATIONS!✨ --- you're one of the few!! 😍 ❤