#woke: mike wheeler i am in you skull

[gayofthefae]

Just dissociated into my GA persona again - one of the better/more accurate feeling times this time - and watched the van scene.

And I think it’s function is supposed to be for Mike to finally start to get it and get what’s going on with Will. It being about getting Will’s feelings across to the audience feels a lot more fourth-wall-break-y. If you’ve been paying attention, you already know based on all the lingering stares and lingering camera shots on them and his reactions even when he’s not doing them. His reactions to Mike have been really emphasized. But even so, it can serve both purposes: putting us and Mike in the same shoes. And there is no/minimal informational purpose of a scene that is just two characters being oblivious to each other when it doesn’t even cause a miscommunication. And within just volume 2, without knowledge of season 5 - which is, of course, how it is meant to be watched: chronologically - the implication is that this scene only exists to reaffirm Will’s feelings to the audience (an insufficient motive if it is has such little affect on the characters if you ask me) and to help give Mike the confidence to tell El he loves her. But if that was the only goal it would have been done without the emphasis on Will’s personal feelings. 

In the past, Mike’s said things and regretted them because he knew they hit on insecurities of Will’s and were just generally not super cool things to say and that’s why he felt bad. But he never knew Will’s specific or personal feelings before. Just inferred that it would hurt based on his knowledge of how Will’s been treated and Will’s immediate facial reaction.

But in this one, the entire scene, Mike is entranced. He’s listening to every word. I’ve said before that he avoids interrupting like he’s scared it’ll ruin it - treating it like new information that is fragilely and vulnerably being delivered to him unlike the claim that Will is just repeating it. The entire scene, Mike is entranced. He’s listening to every word. I’ve said before that he avoids interrupting like he’s scared it’ll ruin it - treating it like new information that is fragilely and vulnerably being delivered to him unlike the claim that Will is just repeating it. He’s gaining new information. And that would also be applicable to just the information about El - if it weren’t for the way he looks at Will. And I don’t just mean in a romantic sense. In fact, I mostly wouldn’t consider it one inherently. It’s more about the up and down looks - examining Will’s face - putting the focus on Will. How Will is saying it; what Will’s micro-expressions mean for the subtext of the information - as if how Will feels about the information has bearing on the information itself. Which wouldn’t be true unless Mike believes that Will is truly the one delivering it. 

He is invested in other conversations with Will. He has been the whole rest of the season. And many of them have been emotionally intimate in a similar positive way to this one. But he has always made steady eye contact with him. He has kept that mutual intimacy through eye contact. This time, he’s analyzing Will visually, looking all across his face for answers, he’s darting back to the painting every time El is mentioned...he’s having A LOT harder of a time processing this information. Will in the scene where he’s packing is a great example of being relieved by hearing something you want to hear that gives your confidence back after a fight. He does not break eye contact. He just takes in the moment. He lets it be until it’s interrupted externally. But Mike isn’t doing it. He’s almost looking like he wants to get out of it not to stop the flow of information but just to escape into his own head (which he seems to do in the end). Will is the one more invested in the actual conversation. At the end, he too wants to break off because he needs to cry in private. He wants to break off for a similar reason of being alone with himself to process everything. But while he is trying to juggle processing it emotionally, Mike is trying to juggle processing it logically. He doesn’t want the flow of information to stop. And he is entranced. His full attention is on Will. Even when he glances away, it’s only in a dash because he is holding his focus and taking everything in, trying not to miss anything, and taking it in emotionally - things like why Will pushed him away.

I’d also like it noted that before this, they were also having quite an intimate conversation! An emotional one about how Mike feels and his deep insecurities. Will hadn’t talked much during it but when he did, this was not how Mike treated it. He didn’t treat it as morsels of invaluable information. He treated it like a normal response in a conversation. And yes, Will’s speech is more important information but still. During the speech, his faces aren’t so ambiguous for the audience. No good art is truly created for its audience. The characters in this have motives. Just like we may be placed in his shoes with Will even for those who knew to have confirmation, we are being placed in his here as well. It is ambiguous because he is confused. He doesn’t know how to react internally. He’s still just taking it all in trying not to miss anything vital.

Will’s words aren’t romantic. But the fact that he passes them off as Will’s is. And the fact that he would feel the need to hide them at all is too. Mike knows this. And he doesn’t know what to do with it. And he doesn’t know what to do with the fact that he doesn’t know what to do with it. Because one fact ABOUT not knowing what to do with it is that he doesn’t immediately know. He doesn’t immediately reject the idea mentally. He doesn’t KNOW that the answer is no - even a kind no. A mental “no” is fairly immediately. You just know these things. Of course, this is all just speculation. The entire point is that Mike’s face is unreadable from his confusion. We don’t GET any reactions from him. That’s. the point.

Until the end. He only responds one time, one word. And it’s to look for confirmation. It seems like a close to the information he’s getting: a concluding statement; an answer to his previous words. So he speaks for the first time. “Yeah?” “Yeah.” 

And he’s happy.

HE’S HAPPY with this. He isn’t still confused - I’m sure he is still processing, he goes back to the painting immediately after and continues looking over it (providing motive to look back up at Will, preoccupied enough to not notice Will is crying when looking back up at him, and/or see it and not be able to emotionally or decide he can’t situationally help). But his emotions are visible here. If we’re meant to be seeing Will’s feelings here. And we’re meant to have seen nothing from Mike indicating feelings for Will previous to this. The information we get is still clear: Will has feelings for Mike. And Mike is happy.

I don’t think it was delivered this way so that Mike doesn’t know about Will’s feelings. I think it was delivered this way so that Will doesn’t know that Mike knows.

And this also indicates to me that Mike didn’t know before this. About any of it. We know from an interview with Finn Wolfhard that Mike was, as of Vol 1 to note, completely oblivious. I am applying this to his own feelings as well. One can act in reaction to their feelings without being consciously aware of them. Mike’s reactions in the van scene are almost universally to himself. You don’t do that that much unless you have A LOT to say to yourself. And you don’t have that much to say to yourself if you’ve already had time to think on your own feelings - even if you have a lot of very confusing feelings. No, Mike is grappling with the concept itself. I don’t know that he has logically come to a conclusion by the end of it - in fact he probably hasn’t - but he does have an immediate emotional reaction upon coded confirmation. 

And this gives Mike time. He knows what Will feels now, so he confirms within Will’s code. He doesn’t ask “do you agree”, he keeps Will safe in his code. But he can clearly see and hear the emotion in the way Will answers. That’s the confirmation he needed. And this way, he keeps Will in the dark about him knowing. He gives himself time to sort it all out. And I’m not analyzing the reasons he does what he later does right now but I will say I know this: he does it in an effort to sort it out. Whether that be just to do what he has to in the moment or out of suppression. And I can also say that when Will telling him to tell El he loves her seems to hurt him. Right now, I don’t think because he takes it as a rejection, but rather because he understands more than we give him credit for. He understands what Will is sacrificing. That Will is hurting himself. He might have thought during the van scene that it was meant as a coded confession. A confession with a fallback plan. But now he sees that it wasn’t. That it was actually a secret always meant to stay a secret. That Will’s confession wasn’t him dipping his toe in the water. It was him being as self-indulgent as he would ever allow himself to be.

So now the ball is in Mike’s court. And he knows it. And he already bought himself as much time as he needs. There are loads of other factors including how he takes much of the information covered and not in this post. Who knows if he takes Will’s self-sacrifice as an invitation or a rejection, for example. But ultimately: Mike is the only one who can make a move, he is on his own time to do it, and he knows it. Now it’s just up to what he’ll do with that information.

a little analysis backtracking into s1-3 to explain his oblivion in the tags

[projectunwritten]

Hunters of the Dead

Preface

I wrote this about 3 years ago; it was during this edgy stage of life and Ithought teenages and zombie apocalypses was literally the best thing ever.

My name is Michael banks Jr. I am responsible for the death of 3/4th’s of the planet earth population and this is my story …..

Chapter 1 origin

The government a reigning power over all of America they know everything, they see everyone. One day I did a simple math problem on my computer next thing my math equation became the answer to immortally or so they thought they able to biology creating and age a human body then it she started to reproduce on her own and it created them. The government was shattered then in their darkest hour they came. The giants attacked every major city around the world, once they killed people they would spit saliva on them and it turn them into zombies that the government was trying to cover didn’t stay hidden for too long. It created a pandemic now because I started this I’m going to end it. “Well then what are we waiting bikey time to kill.” Ashlyn said with a smirk. I looked around and see what people would think are just some kids in war…I see my team, my family, my zombie hunters and our killing spree has just begun.

Chapter 2 4/1/2016

6 hours ago….

A phone rings as an alarm goes off. “That’s my girl I whisper.” I answer the facetime “hey gorgeous” I say yawning. “Hey she says smiling. I turning on the TV while she talks about how Cassie stole her phone. “Morning lovebirds what happening” says Chris as he checks in on the face group along with lily. “Hi “lily says quietly. “Hey” Chris returns shyly with smile. “And u call them lovebirds.” Says Bridget”, she says laughing, “right mike …. Mike?” I turn to the camera in laptop, “Makenna, bridge their here.”(Mike) “What no, no where?”(Makenna) ‘’ new York, Chicago, Las Vegas, Seattle “(mike) “good there’s still time I’ll pack my bags “”what are talking about?” Lily asks “ okay don’t think you will believe me at first but 1 year ago me and Makenna were “studying” , I solved a simple math problem use a method she and I created. It was used to create zombies that’s grew into giants possessed by the souls of Nephilim. Now they are attacked major cities as their plague continues to grow.” Chris bursts into tears as Jacob and Ashlyn enter the chat. “Jacob initiated protocol z.” he raises his eyes in response “Umm ok, got mike I’ll be ready roll in ten minutes.” “You have 8.” I end the call as I stuff items in my book bag and grab my phone, my laptop, and chargers, and and a bunch of clothes. I jump off Terrence I look under the stairs and grab my metal bat and metal rods and start running. As I hear a scream by Chris place I grip tighter on the poles which I call “kalis” as I come to the ally and three guys all covered in blood looking as pale snow I can’t explain what during the fight I saw was red.

Chapter 3 Chris Tebich

My name is Chris Tebich and me along with others hunters are responsible for the death of 2/4th population of the planet earth this where my story began….

I screamed because my mean neighbor Mr. Jerkface just got his skull cracked open by two decomposing bodies. As several other join him staring at me. Then mike turns the he yell out something unearthly “prognostic!!” He charges at the first two bodies. Armed with two rods which seem to be bent into a point at the end. Which sticks up the bodies head smiling he rips them out? He throws me a sliver bat I bash my now dead neighbor upside the head but he gets back up keep hitting nothing happens he open his mouth at least 5 inches wide moaning I get ready to die and trip to the ground as a metal rod comes through his throat and the the body drops mike hands me a towel out of his bag. “Well that was fun” he says smiling. As I look back I see the other two bodies on the ground blood everywhere, and I think to myself holy crap… is the real mike … a psychopath

Chapter 4 destiny

We showed up at Jacob’s door I knocked on the door it’s open up by itself. A scream and a yell then a body tumbles downstairs. The body dead we run up to find Jacob with an axe and his mom behind him. “I told u that would come in handy “I say pointing at the axe. “Where’s your sibling and your dad?” “Dad took them to see grandma. “He replies. “Okay next we hit Stasia and Lilly.” I say looking at the two of them “ you two will go get lily, I got stasia ,mrs.lombardi u need pack a bag of whatever u need clothes, food ,water ,medicine ,and a weapon. Find the nearest shelter. A salvation army, a church, safe house, anywhere call your husband tell him you're safe and that Jacob is with me hunting. “ I say as she gets up looks in back of her closet in a box and reveals a gun. “ that’ll do , can you use it ?” She shoots two of them in the head. “Yeah” she says packing a bag. After she left Chris and Jacob to pick up Lily. And I went to get Stasia. I ran as fast as I could. As I stopped two men were at door. Mr. Wildes opens the door. “No!” I yell as an arrow slips past me into one of their head give me time bash the other one. I look back and see Chris with his bow and arrows. “Took you long enough!” Stasia says smiling.

Chapter 5 punishers

After sending the wiles on their way out of home town me, stasia, Chris went to Corey’s place to get his family out of town

As we walked down street we heard a gun fired I instantly was cover in a protective layer of goose bumps that trapped my emotions. I ran for the court Chris at my side and stasia a few feet behind. As I notice that Chris is not fast as he usually is I realized that it wasn’t him. I was get faster, pushed that thought to darkness that consumed my mind as I lost conscious as I saw Jacob yelling axe in hand with Chris removing and arrow from his quiver. Corey: I soon mike showed up all well u no what broke loose. I never seen him like this anger, fast, ruthless. Surrounded by some my friends; ex – girlfriend, and people generally knew it chaos . . . . And I loved it I yelled as I reload and headed into war. Lilly stabbed a walker behind me. I joined Chris as saw he was at his last arrow I threw him my baseball bat. He smiled as he smashed a walkers head. I shot three off them and that when everything got fuzzy.

Chapter 6 Uptown Funk

I woke up in a chair as Shiloh licked my face “down girl!” I shouted. “Hey don’t blame her for your narcasple “stasia said giving me a hand. S’mores and Maggie appeared with fluffy barking at them. “Fluffy their guests!! “ Chris says as he looks at me like a ghost, “hey mike’s up…. Christian turn that crap down!! “I listen as uptown funk by Mark Robinson feat. Bruno mars played through room “nooo!!!” I said running for the stereo I unplugged it, “how many songs did u play? “ I asked. “ just this “ Christian said “ check the windows and the back door “ I barked as I looked at the song’s stopped time frame 3 minutes and 37 second. I relaxed as Christian comes back “nothing’s out man” “why are you freaking out mike “Jacob asks as he cooked breakfast. “They can hear sound even our voices will attract them. The stereos and all the dogs here I’m surprised we're not dead yet. Everyone fell silent as they stared at my face. I hadn’t noticed till now I had blood of my hands. I looked at the transparent screen of my iPhone 6s+ the blood spatter of blood on my face

Chapter 7 survival

I hold my breath the darkened silence as I hear lily knocking on the door. I raise my head from the sink. Water dripping from my face. Lily shouts from outside the door “u ok in there? “. “Yeah I reply I grab the towel of the rack and wiped off my face. I opened the bathroom door. And get right to business. “I need answers ASAP #1. Chris Where’s urn folks and Bridgett #2. Is the van and 4 wheeler here #3? Stasia and Lilly Jacob and JJ u need to learn how to drive in 6 hours. My phone rings as it the screen stays pitch black at first think it’s an alarm but as pick up the phone up I realize its vibrating and grab the nearest knife located in my back pocket. I pick at the side of my case till it opens I reveal a second device an iPod 5 with words Haven lit up as she facetimes me as it connects Jacob where it came from? I explain that only a small group of people have the contact info to secret phone for emergency. It finally connects I hear Mary scream as a gun fires “Haven what’s happening!!” “ mike thank good please help us pastor Brian and Mr. G r dead we need help “ I hear the fear in her voice as the goosebumps return as response “ Five minutes “ and end the call. JJ hold down the fort Jacob, and Chris your with me grab the van we leave in 5. “Wow who died and made you leader “Chris retorts “Pastor Brian and Mr. Galante “I say as Chris staring at him. “Let’s rock Jacob “he says grabbing his coat and his mom’s keys.

Chapter 8 savage Awakening

A Coma that’s the only way I know how to explain as I rode in the back of Chris’ as Jacob drove down the street which he pretty decent driver. {Better than my “bus driver” dad that’s for sure} The van felt dark and comfort like kind of sleep u don’t want to wake up from. “We’re here” Jacob says I snap my eyes open as the goosebumps cover my face. Chris jumps out the car bat in hand guess it’s from his garage. Instantly we see half a dozen corpses. Jacob yells out “I got it! “As he lifts his axe. He gets closer and confirms my suspicion. He looks at the corpses and it’s Julie Pastor Brian's Wife and the one of the youth group leaders I saw that Jacob was in shock grabbed the bow and ran at Chris then I took an arrow from his Quiver and shot at Julie head. This snapped Jacob into reality or was it when Ben and Andrew came out the side door yelling at us to run. We ran for door making it in by the skin of our teeth. I look in the back to see David huddled in a corner “Ben?” I say looking at David “what happened?” “It was too much. Dad tried to run from them. But tripped and fell it pushed David forward as the door swung closed he watched as Andrew and Pastor Brian ripped him apart as they killed him. “ I’m sorry about your Dad Ben he was a good man” I said “ Hey we all have to die sometime a saw his eyes flicker a little as if a fire had just been started.

Chapter 9 Safe House Pt. 1 & 2

Part 1

I sat in the back with Ashley and David. Ashley sitting balled up in a corner scared out of her mind. On my Right side David looked out the window. I stared down at the floor and closed my eyes as I drifted into nothing. "Mike" I hear voice as I wake up I look up at Kayla "Haven and Kiva need you up front to get to your house" she says I slide past her as she takes her seat. As I reach the front I see Haven talking to Jacob over a walkie talkie. "Mike show us the way" she says. {'Mike we're following you'} “Kiva get off 5th take a right here on to Waterford Dr., it'll take about minute to get down there." I say "ok head down here ". We headed into my back all pull into parking lot next to our house {809 Four Seasons Drive}. "Everyone out getting into my house is our number one priority. Priority #2 not dying. “I said to the entire bus.” then we might want to do that know” Says Jacobs there are about 3 or so dozen Of THEM. "Well then Chris, Corey cover if you anything that's dead moving ... Shoot it." I say as the goosebumps come back. HAVEN: As Mike closed he his eyes I wondered what he was doing. Then he opened his eyes as I see his eyes dilate full of black nothingness, it scared me. “Let’s go “he says in a low but loud tone. We waste about 2 minutes standing around so by the time we got out they down at the end of the ally "Run!!!!!" I hear Parker say as we all run for mike's Garage. Mike punches in the code to his garage. As it rises he yells out "back door is open, GO!!!" I open the back door people pour inside. The only ones left are Mike, Ben, Marlon, Jacob, and Corey “Drop the Macho Act and get inside “I Barked at them. MIKE: heard what she said as we all backed into the garage. I saw David standing in the middle of the alley {" he wants to die"] with hesitation I ran for him" what are you doing”! Jacob shouted. I point at David standing least 10 ft. from a hoard of dead corpses. I unclicked the garage door "Ben, Marlon, Corey, Jacob be ready to shut the garage door shut as soon as we get in" And without waiting for a response. I ran as fast as I could. I picked up David and ran for the garage. With the one arm I wasn't using to carry him( who was surprise light and not restating )I slammed my trash cans on to the ground . I ran into the garage “Close it" I yelled. As they slammed the garage door closed I realigned the chain and we all took a rest then I got up. “Were not done yet.

Part 2

"Ok Ben and Alex move that couch in there onto window ", I say as we walk into the basement / downstairs area. “Got it “ben says without hesitation. He and Alex start to move the couch. “Marlon help me with hall desk upstairs " He follows me upstairs " Why are we moving all this Stuff ?" he asked me as we move the desk " Zombies come in pack small that maul and suffocate people. Large ones that knock down doors, Gates, and walls. We’re reinforcing the doors and downstairs windows, for precaution." I say he nods in approval. After the front door and downstairs windows were secure. And the Main TV was brought out my mom's room we monitored the news. I explain how the Media referred to it as an “OUTBREAK” because they don't know what's going on. “And you do?” Stephen says in disbelief “Yes, their dead corpses walking among us, bloodthirsty and savage. The only way to "CURE" them ..." " Is to kill THEM” Ben says as grips him knife he uses to cut an apple and chops through it. “Exactly " David saying his first all evening he and his brother stare at each other and I saw their savage awakening