#without having actually particularly read or cared about anyone else's. i feel like this may be strange to have done several times.

[loveletterworm]

(homestuck specifically does not count here because its too popular and would break the intent of this question. I dont care if you read homestuck. Pretend it doesn't exist for the purposes of this question)

[fun-eralsss]

was making a post about all my intersex headcanons, but i realized that so many of them were from homestuck that i might as well make a whole post solely about them. so yea :)

btw this one’s gonna be LONG AS HELL

homestuck headcanons (intersex edition because i do what i want :p)

first off, the humans!!

jade harley (NCAH): honestly, it’s mostly just vibes. plus her whole thing is dogs n stuff. dogs have a lot of hair. you know who else has lots of hair? people with NCAH

roxy lalonde (AIS): remember that whole thing where hussie revealed the last two letters of her name first, so everyone immediately headcanonned her as a trans woman, then it was confirmed that she’s cis? homegirl can have XY chromosomes while being cis! bada bing bada boom!

ok now the trolls!! (this section will be significantly longer lmao)

sollux captor (Chimerism): first of all, his blood is literally yellow, so yknow. second of all, duality is a HUGE part of his character! it just makes sense for him to be a chimera to me tbh (i also headcanon that gold and violetbloods are more likely to be medically recognized as intersex but that’s an entirely different can of worms)

nepeta leijon (PCOS): same reasoning as jade, but her whole thing is cats. cats have lots of hair. you know who else has lots of hair? people with PCOS

kanaya maryam (Klinefelter’s Syndrome): most people depict her as being super tall, and you know who tends to be super tall? yeah :)

(i know that it’s kinda implied at all jadebloods are female, just let me have trans intersex kanaya. i beg. i grovel at your feet)

terezi pyrope (undeclared, likely Chimerism): i feel like she would really love to bring up her intersexuality while arguing with a transphobe or intersexist. she would also probably not disclose what her specific variation is so they couldn’t pull the whole “you’re just a fe/male with a dsd!!!!” bs. also, balance is a huge part of her character, so i feel like chimerism particularly suits her

equius zahhak (Hyperandrogenism): his body is quite literally overflowing with testosterone. man is literally sweating 24/7 and frankly, no other indigobloods seem to have as much testosterone as him, so we know this isn’t typical. they’re all strong, yeah, but this guy is on a whole other level. i just KNOW this boy’s skin is oily as hell

(also yes!! i headcanon equius as a cis guy with hyperandrogenism!! intersex doesn’t just mean “man with lots of estrogen” or “woman with lots of androgen”!!)

eridan ampora (PAIS): ok this one is one im actually super passionate about. in the og comic, all female trolls are consistently drawn with black lips (with the exception of nepeta, who i’ve already included on here). all the male trolls are drawn without the lips except for eridan. eridan is shown to have black lips in multiple panels! back when it was first pointed out, most assumed it was because of how feminine he is compared to the other guys, but you know what? idc!!! that boy is intersex and indulges in toxic masculinity due to his insecurity!!! idc what anyone has to say!!! also his blood is literally violet so yknow

damara megido (CAIS): i think she would get a really big kick out of not having body hair, periods or the ability to give birth. obviously there are downsides to it, but i doubt those would get in her way of having fun. i also think she would really like reclaiming That One Japanese Slur For Intersex People

cronus ampora (MAIS): mostly cause vibes and the fact that he’s related to eridan, so it’s more likely. what can i say, the ampora boys are very “does being intersex make me less of a man?” coded

bonuses!!!

rose lalonde (PCOS): she gives me the vibe of a woman who has PCOS but doesn’t consider herself intersex due to how little it affects her. tho i imagine that she’s done lots of reading on intersex variations considering how two people she cares deeply about (kanaya and roxy) do consider themselves intersex

dave strider (MAIS): i know that trans dave is a super popular headcanon and don’t get me wrong, transgender icon dave strider will save the world!! it’s just that for me personally, i’ve only been able to see him as an intersex guy. though in his case, i imagine that he would find out pretty late into his life. and like his sister, considering how little it’s affected his life, he wouldn’t consider himself intersex either

anyways yeah that’s it :) have a good day <3

[doberbutts]

I’ve always said that if I ever have kids I want to adopt, and specifically adopt someone who’s older in the system because the older they are the more likely they are to age out.

Maybe I’m misunderstanding the thread but. Is that still a good thing to want to do?

The thread and conversation is not saying that fostering and adopting is necessarily a bad thing. It's saying that the system in which we do these things sucks, does not take into account the very real problems it has and has had, and that for every feel-good story related to fostering and adoption there are dozens of kids and now-adults with lingering trauma regarding their housing situation.

If adoption is something you're serious about, then by all means, there are so many kids in the system that need a way out. But- and this is a big "but"- you need to go into it prepared. Most of these kids have some sort of trauma, because the system is inherently traumatic. Do you know how to parent someone through their trauma? Can you make that commitment? Can you take this as seriously as if it was a child of your own blood, and commit to forever in the same way?

If you want to adopt, you need to take that commitment as seriously as if you had birthed the child yourself. And if you want to adopt older kids, you need to be prepared to parent someone through their trauma, because they need you to be able to help them out of that dark place. People don't want to adopt them because they don't want to deal with the trauma, but the honest truth is that if no one helps them how will they avoid the incredibly high rates of homelessness, human trafficking, sexual assault, and jailtime waiting for them when they age out?

You're not getting a brand new "fresh slate" baby when you adopt an older kid at risk for aging out. You're getting a whole ass person who is old enough to be deeply harmed by everything that has led up to this point and who has had the system prove to them over and over that they can trust no one and they have no one there to help them. Kids who bounce from foster to foster with little more than an hour's warning and a trash bag to throw all their stuff in before getting dumped at someone else's door. Kids who may still remember, miss, even want to return to their birth family. Kids who may have been hurt by their birth family from the start and now have no trust in anyone. Kids who may be well behind in school due to bouncing from district to district. Kids who've never actually made a friend. Teenagers who still wet the bed. Eight-year-olds acting out their sexual assaults on others because they don't know how else to cope. Preteen girls who can't stand to be in the same room as your husband or father or grandfather without a screaming tantrum. High school students who can't read or write because no one cared enough to teach them how.

These are often kids who have been failed by everyone else they've seen. Don't be just another person who's failed them too.

My sister was 13 when my parents took custody of her. My sister was raised by an addict mom who chose drugs over her, who chose her pimp boyfriend over her, who chose to look the other way when said pimp boyfriend started noticing her daughter was "becoming a woman". My sister spent her first year with my parents having screaming fights with them because she wanted to go home. Not because "home" with her birth mother was better, but because that is what deeply traumatized kids do. Better the devil you know. It didn't matter that it wasn't her or her mother's choice- the state took her away, not my parents. My parents just ensured she had a soft landing. It took a long time for her to trust them enough to call them her family- keep in mind that my dad is her uncle by blood.

And she is considered one of the "lucky" ones, who went straight from separation to an adoptive family who committed to forever immediately. I don't think getting trafficked and beaten and starved and neglected for 13 years is particularly "lucky", nor do I think it leaves behind a non-traumatized kid. But if that's considered lucky, then what happens to the unlucky ones?

[drjohndisco]

Unexpected Confession

Pairing: Basil/Jack (+ Sprig)

Rating: M

Warnings: suggestive language/sexual innuendos, swearing, kiss descriptions, implications of past (non-consensual) mind reading.

Word Count: 1k+

Summary: Jack has a meeting he needs to get to, and Sprig ruins a quiet moment (as per usual.)

Notes:

1) I'm finally done!!! Woohoo!! (<- note from a guy who hyper-focused on this piece more than he probably should have.)

2) I haven't written dual perspective in ages, so I have no idea if this actually worked or not. Also, yes, I am aware that neither Basil's or Sprig's lore hasn't been explained (yet), please just roll with it. (The most important things here are that Basil (who is an alien with low level empathic abilities) works on site as a computer tech/on-call scientist, and that Sprig (a sentient mass of plant tendrils with eyes, but no visible mouth) can feel/always know of Basil’s location — due to previous shenanigans.)

[ Basil's lab - 18:00 ]

Basil

‘What do you want? I already thanked you for getting me out of jail.’ Basil asked, looking up at Jack, who was standing on the other side of the table. He was exhausted, and not particularly in the mood to talk to anyone. ‘Please, just go away. ’

‘No, I won’t. Because then I wouldn’t be a very good friend.’ Jack replied, sitting down on the chair across from him. Basil’s chest ached at the usage of the word friend, but he avoided the sensation. ‘You’ve been here for hours, go and get some rest. The base can keep ticking along without you.’

‘Sure,’ Basil laughed derisively. ‘And fish on your planet have wings!’

‘Uh, actually…’ Jack started. ‘There is a species that….’

‘Don’t fact check me.' Basil groaned. ‘It’s bad enough when Daniel’s around.’

'Fair enough.' Jack conceded.

Then Jack’s pager beeped - making him pull it from his pocket and look down at the message.

‘Oh, great! Another meeting’s been scheduled for about ten minutes from now.’ He complained, looking back up at Basil.

'What's this one for?'

‘Apparently they still need me to tie up some loose ends in terms of this whole attempted murder situation of yours.' Jack said, standing and pushing his chair away.

'How fun!' Basil intoned sarcastically. Then their eyebrows crinkled in confusion. ‘Aren’t you going to leave? You know what you’re like with time.’

'Just follow me to the doorway and I'll quit buggin' you.' Jack explained, beckoning him forward.

'Is that an order, Sir?'

'It is.' Jack stated, before turning and beginning to walk out.

'Fine.’ Basil grumbled, taking some of the paperwork from the table and putting it into their lap, turning the chair to the left. Then they begrudgingly scuffed it along the ground, following Jack. ‘Are you happy now?’

'Sure.' Jack replied, but stopped and looked back at Basil from the doorway.

‘What?’ Basil questioned.

‘You’re not going to kiss me goodbye before I go?’

It was a friendly jibe, and rationally Basil knew this, but that didn't stop him from pulling Jack down by his lapels - kissing him hard.

‘Damn.’ Jack murmured admirably under his breath, hands finding their way into Basil's hair.

Shocked by Jack's unanticipated reciprocation (and the strong emotions that came with it) Basil broke the kiss.

Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit!

Come on, fucking think of something!

‘That….was a one time thing,’ Basil said after a moment - in an awkward attempt to deflect from the situation at hand. ‘Now, I’m just going to go and give these…to someone else who may need them.’

Basil then quickly picked all of the papers up and stood -- not particularly caring whether Jack was even listening to him -- before walking (as calmly as they possibly could) past Jack and out of the door.

Jack

Jack absentmindedly pressed a hand to his lips, as he watched Basil go.

Did I do something wrong?

Then, quietly, Sprig chuckled. Hearing this Jack closed his eyes in desperation.

Of course we had an onlooker.

(But, there’s nothing I can do about that now.)

‘He’s dropped all of those and is running for the lift, isn’t he?’ Jack sighed, not even bothering to look for Sprig (who was currently attached to the outside of Basil’s empty desk plant pot.)

‘Yes, he is.’ Sprig replied. ‘Go and get your bitch, Colonel.'

[ Basil's lab - 18:05 ]

Basil

'Hey,' Jack said gently, as he shut the door behind him. ‘Can we talk?’

…How on earth did he get down here so fast?

The base elevators can’t be that good, can they?

'What is there to talk about?' Basil snapped, as Jack strode over and sat down on their bed across from them. ‘I’m the one that screwed up, just go to your meeting and leave me alone!'

He's too close, I feel like I’m going to vibrate out of my skin.

'I can't, I postponed it.' Jack replied. 'It'll happen tomorrow now.'

'Is that supposed to make me feel better?' Basil retorted.

'No, and I didn't expect it to.' Jack admitted. 'But that's not the point! The point here is that I'm sorry, Basil.'

‘Well, you shouldn’t be!’ Basil said, voice quavering. 'I've ignored what you obviously feel for Sam! That line shouldn't have been crossed!'

‘Damn it, B!’ Jack groaned, exasperatedly raking a hand through his hair. ‘Don't you get it? You're not Carter - and I don't want you to be! My feelings for her don’t affect my feelings for you! Our kiss should have told you that!'

Oh.

'I’m an idiot.’ Basil muttered.

‘Is that supposed to be news to me?’ Jack teased.

‘Oh, do shut up.’ Basil said, before bridging the gap between them; so that they were standing between Jack's legs, hands resting against his hips.

Jack

Jack, to his surprise, found that he had indeed done as instructed. 

(There was no sarcastic remark on his tongue, for once.)

‘May I?’ Basil asked. ‘Kiss you, that is?’

‘Yes, please do.' Jack replied, voice uncharacteristically shaky.

Then, before Jack could blink, Basil had shifted their hands - lifting his head and cupping his face - subsequently initiating a second (and far more passionate kiss).

Closing his eyes Jack kissed them back fervently; wrapping his arms around Basil’s waist to hold them steady as he pulled them closer, before slowly reaching up and snaking a hand into their hair.

Oh, I never want to let them go.

Basil

Eventually, after what seemed like a mere blip in time to Basil, they pulled away from Jack slightly – moving so that their forehead rested against his.

Fuck, this man can kiss! 

(I feel like I'm on fire!)

'Are you okay?' Jack questioned, looking up at Basil.

'Yeah, I'm fine, just a bit tingly.' Basil replied. 'But that will pass.'

'Aw, I'm flattered I could make you feel that way.' Jack joked.

Basil opted to not dignify that with a response.

Then, suddenly, Sprig wolf whistled loudly - shattering the silence.

(He had apparently been watching from a spot on Basil’s bookcase, unnoticed, for some time.)

Startled by this noise Basil let go of Jack and fell backwards, landing on the carpet with a loud thud (and a muffled yelp.)

[ 18:07 ]

Jack

'Oh, fuck me!' Basil cursed angrily, sitting up and hitting the carpet with his fist.

‘Woah, hold your horses, cowboy!’ Jack laughed, as he leaned forward and offered a hand to help them. ‘At least let me buy you a drink first.'

‘Jack, you know that’s not what I meant.' Basil said, grabbing hold of Jack's hand – using him to slowly return to a standing position.

'Honey, are you sure about that?’ Sprig taunted, sliding across the floor so he was positioned next to Basil. 'I've been inside your mind, and, honestly, some of your thoughts made even me blush. Which, if you think about it, is quite a high bar.'

'Sprig, stop being an ass!' Jack yelled, interrupting him.

In response Sprig poked his tongue out at Jack, annoyed.

'Very mature.' Jack said, in a voice reminiscent of a tired father. 'What are you, twelve?’

‘I’m far older than that, but I doubt your tiny brain could comprehend my true age. It'd explode before you even got close.’ Sprig replied, snidely. 

'Oh, well done.' Jack goaded. 'Took you a long time to come up with that, did it?'

'Actually, now that I think about it, it is the one advantage your lover here has over you.' Sprig continued, ignoring Jack's comment. 'Although so far it doesn't seem to be doing Basil any good. They did fall for you, after all.'

Jack opened his mouth to reply, but stopped when he noticed the icy look in Basil's eyes.

'Huh. I didn't peg you as being the submissive type, Jack...' Sprig sneered. 'Basil, on the other hand, however...'

Basil

‘Sprig, if you don't shut up soon, I'll go and get the wood chipper!’ Basil threatened.

'Oh no, so frightening! However shall I go on?' Sprig responded, raising a tendril to where Basil assumed his chest should be, and gasping mockingly. 'Goodbye, cruel world!

Then he disappeared with a pop, showering Basil with leaves.

‘Well someone must have woken up on the wrong side of the flower bed this morning.’ Jack noted, after a beat.

'Oh, you didn't...' Basil groaned, shaking their head to remove the debris. ‘I think that may have been one of the cheesiest things I have ever heard you say.'

'It's all part of my charm, sweetheart.' Jack replied, grinning. 'I know you love me for it.'

Yes, Jack.

(Yes, I do.)

[sweet-hearts-and-destiny-knots]

Hi! I’ve been following you for a while now (since before you started working on sisterhood). I love the concept you have for Sisterhood a lot. I’m just curious about what shippings you like since I feel like I know some of them but not all of them (and I know how shipping can change over time). If you feel like talking about them, I would love to hear about them!

I've accumulated a vast assortment of pairings the past several years, particularly due to being a multishipper (but not a polyshipper-). However, for each protagonist there is usually what a friend of mine refers to as an "endgame" love interest: the one who I feel resonates with her personality most.

For example, the pairings related to Leaf are Conflictingshipping (Green/Blue x Leaf) and LeafStoneshipping (Brock x Leaf). The former is the "endgame" pairing for her. As for the latter, I actually concocted the name myself.

(There are a number of pairings I've been left with the solemn duty of bestowing a name upon, in actuality-).

An additional detail to keep in mind is, for anyone else who may be reading; the ages of several characters are altered in the universe of Sisterhood, meaning everyone involved, including the female protagonists, is a young adult.

Kotone, her "endgame" pairing is SoulSilvershipping (Silver x Kotone). Silver is truly the only person she has a romantic relationship with, although he is rather prone to experiencing jealousy when other male characters, such as Hibiki(Ethan) and Morty, are in her presence.

Haruka also has two paths of romance before her in the forms of HoennChampionshipping (Steven x Haruka) and NewRivalshipping (Wally x Haruka). What can I say? She has a type, and it's nerds. Haruka couldn't care less about the former's status and money, and she isn't so shallow that his looks would instantly capture her heart.

Hikari has no love interests to speak of in Sinnoh, but under the alias of Akari while in Hisui, she has quite a few options! Wieldershipping (Volo x Akari) and BrilliantDiamondshipping (Adaman x Akari) are the main contenders, but additionally... I also am somewhat partial to CandyTruffleshipping (Melli x Akari), for humor related reasons.

Ferriswheelshipping (N x Touko) is Touko's "endgame" pairing. Similarly to Kotone, she has no other love interests. However, Cheren does harbor romantic feelings for her during the course of Black and White's main game before eventually moving on and finding happiness with Bianca.

Technically, Mei has two and a half love interests? Initially, LiveCastershipping (Curtis x Mei) was intended to be the "endgame" pairing for her, but I gradually grew more and more fond of Hue and his one-sided affections. And to elaborate on the "two and a half love interests", Kyouhei(Nate) is sort of one, but... it's... it's complicated.

Serena is another protagonist who has a sole pairing associated with her, which is Kalosshipping (Calem x Serena). And yet, I also can't consider Calem her "endgame" love interest. I don't dislike him, but... he's lacking a certain je ne sais quoi. So perhaps Legends: Z-A may introduce Serena to her perfect beau?

Despite how frequently she teases and torments him, Mizuki's main love interest is Gladion. Although I do also enjoy some Malasadashipping (Hau x Mizuki) on the side. Regardless of whether their relationship is platonic or romantic, Hau is an important part of Mizuki's life in Alola now.

Gloria has two tsundere boys battling for her attention and affection. Not that Bede and Avery would admit this without raising a fuss. I haven't yet decided which will be her "endgame" love interest, so I suppose DressedInPinkshipping (Bede x Gloria) and Barriershipping (Avery x Gloria) will also be competing for my approval!

Juliana has the most love interests out of all the protagonists thus far! A grand total of four! HerbaMysticashipping (Arven x Juliana), Dipplinshipping (Kieran x Juliana), Tracksuitshipping (Drayton x Juliana) are the primary pairings, but Grusha does occasionally show interest in the academy's Book Wurmple as well.

There are also various pairings in Sisterhood which don't involve the female protagonists. Some include the male protagonists, such as Red possibly becoming a couple with Misty, while others are composed of non-player characters, one of my favorites being Surveyshipping (Laventon x Cyllene). The professor and captain are married in this universe, as a matter of fact!

And because the world of Pokémon is always expanding, this means there should always be more pairings! Legends: Z-A is soon to be upon us, after all! But hopefully not too soon.

[blessedarethebinarybreakers]

Thank you for your many insightful posts on the current conflict going on. The one giving a detailed breakdown on the "who was there first?" argument was particularly helpful given that, as someone very familiar with the "Land Back" movement in America, I struggled from trying to approach the Palestine issue from that same perspective.

I did have something else I've been struggling with that maybe you can help me out on, though: I've seen "Zionist"/"Zionism" used a lot to help separate those who endorse the concept of a modern state of Israel from Judaism as a whole, since a very large portion of the Jewish community doesn't support what Israel is doing. For me personally, however, I've frequently seen that word used as a dog-whistle for antisemitism in general (most infamously in relation to The Protocols of the Elders of Zion), so I've been kind of wary about using Zion/Zionist in regular discussion. Did I just have a misinformed first impression towards using that term, or is it indeed something we still have to be careful about using even in regards to current events?

Hello! I hope you don't mind me publishing my response, in case anyone has further information to share on the topic of zionism. I am by no means an expert on this — I'm kind of synthesizing various posts & articles I've read over the years to write my answer, and I may be missing some important elements. I welcome correction or added info from anyone with more knowledge than I.

I'm with you in feeling there's a need for care when encountering talk of "zionists," because this term is indeed bandied about inappropriately. Just here on tumblr, I've seen various Jewish folks speak out about how freely people label any Jew with an opinion they don't like a "zionist" in order to dismiss any concerns that Jewish person tries to raise.

So when "zionist" is used to mean "any Jew I disagree with," or "all Jews," or anything not specifically related to "movement in favor of a sovereign Jewish state (e.g. modern Israel)," it's being used incorrectly and harmfully.

...And ugh, it's bad enough when randos on tumblr are doing it; it's been disturbing to see political leaders and activists and the like doing it on a wider scale these past few months.

We all need to be able to talk about the very real issue of zionism without contributing to antisemitism. How do we do that? Here are some rules of thumb I follow (and again, I welcome more if anyone has other tips):

I educate myself on what Zionism actually is. This article on the Jewish Voice for Peace site is super helpful as a starting point. It discusses where this ideology originated, how zionism takes various forms, and how Zionism is harmful for Jews (for instance, it's harmful because it rejects the diaspora as "inherently toxic and unhealthy for Jews," which means rejecting elements of Jewish culture that have arisen from diaspora).

I resist wondering if a Jewish person is zionist / pro-Israel without any reason to think they might be. (I've seen a couple posts from Jewish people now saying that gentiles do this to them. It's super inappropriate and antisemitic to do this — after all, we don't demand that of every non-Jewish person, so we shouldn't be demanding it of every Jewish person.)

If I see a claim that X person is a zionist, I don't just take that claim at face value; I investigate. See if that person has self-identified as a zionist anywhere, etc. If I can find no evidence, I don't spread that claim around; and I might reach out to whomever posted it to ask what gives.

I focus my time, energy, and concern on zionists / people who are pro-Israel in my own communities — rather than running around declaiming every Jewish zionist I can. As a Christian, I focus on trying to cultivate conversations with fellow Christians whom I know hold zionist or philosemitic views; those are the people I'm more likely to be able to change, after all. For any other Christians interested in what Christian zionism tends to look like and how to combat it, I highly recommend this post.

(Another helpful post tangentially related to this topic is this one about "the three Israels")

[svsssfanonarchive]

Honestly it may not be your intention or of other people in the conversation but some comments around the sqq light eyes post have really rubbed me off the wrong way. I'm saying this with all the respect in the world and acknowledging your post about how you don't condemn harassment, but even before with the curly haired binghe and overall in danmei fandom it feels overly judgey towards westerners. Like these physical characteristics being a result of "whitewashing" when there's examples of official art or asian artists (the ZeldaCW art you linked) being some of the earliest examples. Most of us don't know Chinese, many don't even speak english and have to rely on MTL. I really appreciate this work you're doing and going to the original source, but I'm not into the gatekeeping tone some people are taking. Like, AHA! I knew this and actually all the people who don't are stupid for regurgitating fanon like it's canon. I'll be honest, there's plenty of fanon I don't like nor agree with, and I also make dumb mistakes myself (it's me, I'm one of the people who'd forgotten the hand scar came from jin lan woops). Sorry if this is too long or overly rambly, also feel free to ignore it. I mostly wanted to share this as a PSA that tone matters, be kind to others, and that preserving canon is not justification to regard people who go with fanon with a high brow. Regards, a non white non asian ESL 3rd world country svsss fan that's been in the fandom for a couple years (I point that out because I've seen way too many times any criticism be attributed to butt hurt white americans).

Thank you for your message!

When I make my posts here, I try my best for a neutral, informative tone, but between neurodivergence and linguistic issues, I’m not always certain exactly how it comes across. Perhaps a bit too blunt, perhaps the academic or formal tone I often use may seem stuck-up… really, I don’t have the best sense of it, though I do try quite hard.

I want to provide information here. This is to provide information for a few types of people: those who wish to maintain canon accuracy, and those who wish to know where an idea might have originated whether or not they care about canon accuracy in their own works.

Some people will hold canon as the most important. Others don’t particularly care. Some prefer fanon. How one interacts with fandom is entirely their own decision. My blog here isn’t trying to tell people they’re wrong. Or tell people that I’m better than they are, or that those who didn’t know something was fanon, or who enjoy fanon, are stupid or otherwise less than those who follow canon.

Fandom is supposed to be fun. I do this because I like analyzing things. Because it might be nice to have a record of details to see where trends came from. Even some things, I haven’t been sure about myself until doing the research, and some I’ve been mistaken on too!

Things can get muddled up. Especially when the wiki is updated with fanon information. It’s not hard for something to be thought of as canon when it isn’t, especially if trying to quickly reference something without reading the book again. No one is better than anyone else for what they do and don’t know about a fictional book.

And when it comes to design choices, there’s no need to jump right to whitewashing. A knee-jerk reaction is common in fandom spaces to anything that may be “problematic,” but sometimes a design is just a design. I only went into more detail on the post regarding LBH’s hair texture because that’s something i have experience with, and it’s not something widely known about that there are differences.

At any rate, there’s no reason to be unkind to others. People should be having fun in fandom. Those who wish to stick to canon should respect those who don’t care to, even if it’s not for you.

My posts are not meant to create a moral judgement against anyone.

If you’re using it for anything but information, then you’re using it the wrong way.

I don’t have the best eye for tone, but I will continue to do my best to maintain neutrality, and informativeness. Everyone who makes conversation on my posts, just because you knew something and others didn’t doesn’t make you better than them. It just means you knew something. Just because you didn’t know something, that doesn’t make you worse— it just means you didn’t know.

Let’s not moralize this sort of thing.

Enjoy the novel, enjoy the adaptations and interpretations that you like.

[backjustforberena]

It might be faulty assumptions but I always presumed that Laenor was Rhaenys favorite child. Not something she could say because how would that look the overlooked for a male heir woman favoring a son over a daughter?

You said Laenor is everything you could want in a son, but not for Corlys. Laena is everything Corlys wanted in a son, but didn't get. Laena is brash and brave and devoted, wild in the best of ways and fully aware of all their family is.

Laenor is sweet and kind, yes he's brave but in a different sort of way. He's not picking fights that he can't win, he's not trying to gain more, advance more, he's trying to hold to his place in life where it stands, even if sometimes he doesn't know where that is.

Rhaenys demurs a little at Laena's proposed marriage to Viserys, but outright worries over Laenor and seems to want to reject the engagement out of fear for her son.

Also it seems like she spent more one on one time with him, at least young, someone had to teach him how to be a dragon, how to fly.

Firstly, I just want to say that I don't think, on this subject at least, that there is such a thing as faulty assumptions. I don't really care to hear if you think Rhaenys and Corlys hated their children or didn't feel anything for them because I think that's untrue. But when looking at nuances within the relationships and especially considering such a thing as favourites... so long as you have good reasoning, then I may disagree with you but I'm not going to say you're wrong wholeheartedly or that you're being anything approaching stupid or foolish or one of those words. I'm not going to insult you or seek to offend, basically.

I hadn't really considered the optics of Rhaenys's position as a past claimant having any real impact on who her favourite child might be or what she'd say if she was asked. I think the danger on that has passed. I don't think it would be particularly read into. It's also worth saying that, whereas Laenor is the younger sibling in the book, Laena is the youngest in the show. So it wouldn't be anything alarming to anyone if she showed favouritism to her eldest child who just so happens to be son. It's not indicative of any opinion that daughters are inferior, especially without an inheritance actually involved.

An interview that I suggest watching, and one I rewatched for this ask, is THIS. At about 3 minutes in, Eve and Steve are asked about their preferences towards their children, though only, really, within the context of fulfilling the ambition of getting close to the Throne. That, for me, is pretty much gospel because that's how the actors themselves have played it and I think it comes across, even when, as they say in the interview, it's not really in the script.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on it. It's very sneaky stuff, with Eve coming to Steve's rescue a little bit. Certainly, I think we can say that, even just taking away the subject of "favourites", what they say on Laena being like Corlys and perhaps Laenor being like Rhaenys is true, just in terms of emotional connections. And Corlys's role as a patriarch is always going to be harsh on Laenor. It just is, whether there is love there or not or whatever the personalities are. He is the heir, he has expectations hat would have been true if he'd married a local gentrywoman or... in this case, the Crown Princess.

The only way that Laenor fails, as a son, is that he doesn't produce heirs. Everything else is pretty much spot on. He's a great warrior and someone who learns at the feet of his father. He's an experienced and dedicated swordsman. He's a dragon rider, which is epic. He's described multiple times as honourable, with a good heart. He's dutiful - aware of and willing to do his duty. I think Corlys would rather that than someone looking to pick fights.

I don't even think that Laenor being gay bothers Corlys so much. He'd rather it wasn't the truth, make no mistake, and he's harsh surrounding it and prefers to pretend it doesn't exist. But it doesn't seem to disgust him, Laenor never seems ashamed on Driftmark, he's still got Joffrey around etc. If Corlys wanted to put his foot down, I think he would. He does when that sexuality threatens the image of their house but we never see him pull Laenor to task on it. He just ignores it. Plus - the guy was a sailor. He's been to every corner of the world. I doubt homosexuality is the most shocking thing this guy has seen.

I suppose I never really thought of Corlys and Rhaenys instilling the same sense of ambition and drive in their children, or whether they look out for it. When you say Laenor is "not trying to gain more, advance more, he's trying to hold his place in life where it stands" - I don't know if we ever see specific disapproval from Corlys or Rhaenys surrounding that. They certainly don't display it but I think part of that reason is because they don't hold the slight to their mother in the way that Corlys and Rhaenys do. They didn't raise Laena to seek an advantageous match or to be disappointed that she wasn't Queen or even to want to be Queen. They didn't raise Laenor to want his blood on the Throne or to do everything he could to ensure that. Those ambitions seem very, very personal to Corlys and Rhaenys as a couple... if that makes sense?

As to your point about Laena's proposed match to Viserys against her reaction to Laenor... for that I would say yes but... the advantage we have with Laenor's match is that we have a private scene with Corlys. That is the only time she speaks without a mask up and she speaks freely and truthfully about her feelings. We don't have a private scene of Corlys and Rhaenys where they discuss a match between Laena and Viserys. So there's every reason to think that she could have expressed a similar level of worry.

As for one-on-one time, actually, I think Rhaenys probably spent more time with Laena overall. If you add it all together. They'd be bound together because of their gender and the activities that come with that. But also, more specifically, because Laenor was away at war for three years. He was in the Stepstone. So, whilst there's going to be some one-on-one time with dragons, that's still a big chunk of time where she didn't see her son but would still be raising Laena. She would have participated more in Laena's childhood than Laenor's. Though, it could be, again due to roles and whatnot, that Laenor also ended up spending more time with his mother than with his father overall. Who knows.

[bedsheetghost413]

Ghost rants about Mariko Tamaki's "Skim."

Honestly, the Mariko Tamaki hate is kinda deserved because "I am Not Starfire" is a shitty self insert, and "Skim" has a literal teacher-student romance that isn't ever shown as really bad or illegal. But I think people ignore her other work that is actually kinda good. I grew up reading her comics in middle school, and they felt important and like they had something profound to say. Probably because I was a gay tween trying to figure out myself, but it still shows that they still had an effect on me. Particularly "This One Summer" and "Laura Dean Keeps Breaking Up with Me."

It's also kinda weird how the only people I've seen actually review her work are "comics/media is getting too woke now!!1!1!!!11" types. Like, it feels like they're just hating on her without trying to understand why certain artistic choices were made or if there was any meaning behind a character's actions. I remember that the art teacher did tell Skim she wanted to end things, idk if it was when Skim came to her house after she left the school or another thing, but every review I've seen skips over that. I feel like with the inclusion of that part, the story becomes more of a "teacher takes advantage of a student who feels lonely and isolated, feels guilty and bad about it, student still doesn't understand because she isn't mature enough to realize what happened was wrong" story. The art teacher feeling bad doesn't do anything to make the situation better or absolve her of her actions. She was the adult, and she should have kept things professional and legal. But it changes how the reader can interpret the story. I still don't understand why it was included, though. It could've just been a "gets a first girlfriend and then she breaks up with me for no reason" romance instead, maybe even make the girlfriend her friend's older sister (but still within an acceptable age range) to imply that the girlfriend broke up with Skim because she felt bad about dating her little sister's friend.

I always thought of "Skim" as being about a high school girl who's angsty and shitty. We're getting a small glimpse of her life and what happens in that time frame. We see how there's a tragedy at her school that she sees the response to as being "over dramatic." Which is ironic because Skim herself is just as dramatic, not how she thinks her classmates are being, but in the way a kid on a TV show goes through an edgy phase. I think people forget that a protagonist can be an asshole because that's another complaint I see brought up all the time. Skim is an ass. You don't have to like her, she doesn't care if you do, but she also does because she wants to be liked. She's a teenager, anyone who's recently been a teen, one that was an outcast like Skim and had an edgy phase, can relate to that. You want to be cool, but not like the popular kids are cool, so you go too far in the other direction, and you feel like everyone else doesn't like you, so now you feel like an outcast.

Another thing I don't get people complaining about is the diary format and how it's "too disjointed." It's a diary. Is it supposed to be like reading a day by day basis of what happened and how and where and when? No! A diary is meant to be a collection of thoughts, feelings, and other shit you want to get off your chest. Does it always work? No. Does it mean it's a bad format? No. I feel like it fits with what "Skim" is going for. It just may not have been executed well.

I think I might re-read all the books of hers I read as a kid to see if they still hold up as much as I felt they did. It's been a good few years since I've read any of Mariko Tamaki's books, so maybe I'll interpret things differently now. I based all of the above on what I remember thinking and how I interpreted the book when I read it in middle school.

[xkuraitenshiart]

*TW: DEPRESSION, ANXIETY, SELF HATE, ABUSE

*TL:DR: I have a shit relationship with my mom, and made a comic about it... And I'm just depressed about being a failure of an adult. 🤷🏽

•

•

•

Once upon a time, I wanted to do a doodle comic, but my AuDHD brain kept wanting to add too much detail, and I was struggling with being able to make a comic in what I thought was a "reasonable amount of time". So I scrapped them... But... I think I may give them another try with a different purpose....

I.. just feel like absolute shit all the time. My depression is eating me alive. And my anxiety keeps me constantly worried about everything. I'm so tired. So I'm using these to kind of get my frustrations out and grieve.

The best I can do backstory wise, without writing an actual autobiography, is that I have a garbage relationship with my mother because of RSS... and the fact that as an infant, she left me with her mother so she could go live her life because she wasn't ready for me at 19 when she accidentally got pregnant... And my grandmother was no saint. She didn't want me either, but came from a time where it was considered lowly to relinquish unwanted children to CPS. She was also extremely racist, and I was a "half-breed", so my treatment growing up was abysmal. There was also my uncle, who still lived with my grandmother, who became my biggest abuser

After she had had my younger sister and gotten married, she offered for me to live with her, when I was about 9. I didn't take her up on this until after a particularly violent incident when I was 15, and simply couldn't take the abuse anymore. My uncle had pushed the line hard enough to feel like if I let myself stay in his presence, I would meet a very painful end.

So from 15 to 18, I finally lived with my mother, and we DID NOT get along. I never really got to know her as a person growing up, and then struggled with her need to constantly be the center of attention.... And with the fact that it was pretty obvious that she liked my sister, but not me. At 18, I was told that under no certain conditions, was I allowed to try and move back into her house. I was also told that the decision wasn't made lightly, but as a disrupter of peace, this was for the best.

I accepted this, and lived in a tent on and off until I was 21. Everything that's happened to me since then has just been hell, with the occasional happy moment... I... Don't blame her, though... I was a lot... And I really should have been able to care for myself by now.... I guess I'm just sad that I feels like it'd be easier for everyone if I wasn't around. Because I shouldn't rely on someone else to help me with things I don't understand. I'm suppose to understand this stuff at my age. I don't have an excuse. I'm simply a failure.

...I'm sorry to anyone that decides to read this... I'm just too afraid to post it anywhere one of my step dads may accidentally see it and show my mother.

I know that sounds highly counterintuitive, but... I admit I'm just tired of how my mother reacts when I finally vent like this.

THAT'S the only time I get a call or text message. I HAVE to look like I'm in crisis to matter. And I don't want that... I just want... I just want her to actually care. Because when she ONLY comes to me when it looks like I'm at the edge again, it feels like she just doesn't want it on her conscious, and that's the only reason she's reacting... I'm sorry...

[pocket-size-cthulhu]

Sending you so many good vibes.

I have a good amount of medical trauma too. It's different from yours and not quite as intense, but specifically the OBGYN and blood work are very very very difficult for me.

I have a couple of tips, for you or anybody else reading this looking for tips:

Therapists: if you can find a trauma informed therapist they are usually really good with medical trauma and recognize it as a reasonable reaction to stuff that's happened to you, rather than calling it a phobia or whatever that feels like it's shaming you. Bodily autonomy is so important and a bad experience at the doctor can cause actual trauma!! I get that! I mean I literally have that 😬

Picking doctors: at the height of my inability to go to the OBGYN I asked around for doctors who were also trauma informed, either for sexual trauma or medical trauma. Those doctors were awesome, were very careful not to touch me without my consent and without fully explaining what they were about to do/doing, and would recommend rather than pressure me to get things like physical exams. They were also prepared to help walk me through some of my trauma responses, stopping what they were doing, breathing deeply, waiting for me and asking if I was ready to be touched again, if I needed a break or if I needed to be done. I could not have gotten the help I needed without those doctors.

Taking a buddy: people have probably already said this but it's been helpful for me to have a trusted buddy be there with me to hold my hand and to say no to things for me, or to request various accommodations for me when I freeze up after being asked to do something.

Comfort object/stim: nothing is preventing you from taking a comfort object or a distracting stim toy to the doctor with you. I had to have a series of uncomfortable exams for a while and besides that particular office doing an excellent job of making me feel comfortable, I brought putty with me and played with it while they were examining me and it helped me feel like I wasn't just laser focused on what they were doing at all times. That may be an option for less invasive exams etc - I wouldn't insult you by suggesting that could get you through something scary and invasive at the height of dealing with this trauma. But maybe for something simpler like when they look in your ears or listen to your breathing or something.

Blood work: this one is still difficult for me. My last few experiences having my blood drawn have not been unpleasant but my early experiences with it still make me super super scared. I take a snack and drink with me, cause you're totally allowed to do that too. I usually bring chips ahoy and apple juice. I ask them to let me lay down for it (they've been happy to let me do that every time). I usually bring a buddy to hold my other hand and make conversation with me (and so that I have somewhere to look), and reach my snacks when I'm done. They let me lay down in that room for as long as I want to while I recover and check on me periodically. The doctors who do this have always been gentle and happy to accommodate me, and in my experience they are good at assigning you someone more experienced when you seem particularly nervous.

Refusal: it sounds like you know this, but for anyone else, YOU CAN ALWAYS REFUSE to do something you don't want to do. They want you to get into a hospital gown and the very thought sends you into a panic spiral? You can say no. Or bring a buddy to say no for you in case you get a stubborn nurse. They say they want to do a certain kind of exam or something on you? You can say no. You can always say no. And you can also schedule another time to do it - I do this with blood work every time. I'm never emotionally prepared day-of, so I tell them I'll come back when I'm ready to have it done.

Anyway, I hope you're able to get some answers soon. Those symptoms sound awful. :/ I have PCOS actually and my symptoms are different, but like, it's ridiculously hard to get diagnosed 💀 like they want to do an ultrasound, but the ultrasound is only helpful if you actively have cysts at the moment and not everybody has cysts all the time. I got insta-diagnosed by some random doctor who was like, "you say your period is irregular and heavy, and I can see you have a lot of acne and some facial hair, that's PCOS" and I was like ??? Sir??? But he was right 🤷 my blood work is even atypical for someone with PCOS, but ultimately PCOS is a collection of symptoms rather than like a root cause. You don't even have to have cysts, iirc, to get diagnosed sometimes, if you have enough of the other symptoms. It's a mess.

FWIW mine is treated with spironolactone rather than birth control and it works for me 🤷

Really really hope you get it all figured out. 💛 Best of luck!

I don't track my menstrual cycle because it's always been irregular and actively focusing on that fact makes me really stressed and upset, but throughout this year i've been bleeding for several weeks straight at a time and only stopping for 1-2 week stretches

I feel like it's contributing a lot to my fatigue, and pads are expensive, and I am just really sick of it.

I wish there was a version of going to the doctor where they weren't allowed to touch you so I could talk to someone without spending hours with my body literally on the brink of fight or flight. Even when medical professionals are kind to me, the fact that they feel entitled to touch my body makes me feel wild-animal-clawing-at-the-walls levels of unsafe.

I desperately want to be on some form of birth control but I'm too afraid to even ask.

[save-the-villainous-cat]

Hi I’ve been binge reading your work recently and it’s amazing so I wanted to make a request.

Hero x villian where one of them Is very akward shy and self conscious (maybe a bit touch starved) , always wearing oversized clothes to hide themselves/ thst or body. the other wants to just show them how much they adore them. Maybe some body worship or praise kink, the level of spice is in your hand.

Take breaks drink some water and have a lovely day

The villain didn’t really know how they ended up on the bed with the hero on top of them, but in this situation the how was completely irrelevant. What mattered was what would come next.

They had been dating for a few weeks now — in secret, obviously — but the villain still had to get used to the term relationship and what it meant. They weren’t particularly good at it, they thought at least. At first they had been so afraid of dating and physical contact, that they’d almost dumped the hero.

However, the hero had encouraged them, supported them. They had asked what they were afraid of, had given them solutions, reassurance — everything the villain could’ve asked for.

They weren’t pushy. They were perfect.

Now, it was getting serious and that was truly scary.

“Are you okay?” the hero breathed against the villain’s neck, their hands still on the villain’s hips. “You just tensed up.”

They placed another kiss on the villain’s cheek.

“Yeah…” the villain whispered. “I’m fine.”

“Don’t lie to me, baby. I know you better than anyone,” the hero answered. “What’s wrong?”

They slowly kissed the villain’s throat, careful, skillful. The villain wanted to moan but they felt like that would be pathetic. So, instead, they just swallowed it and replaced it with another heavy breathing.

“I…it’s okay.”

“No.” The hero stopped suddenly, studying the villain thoroughly. “I won’t continue if you feel uncomfortable.”

“It’s just…it’s not you. Please don’t think that.”

“What is it then, my love?” the hero asked, their lips brushing the villain’s when they spoke. It made the villain’s insides burn in a good way.

“My body…I don’t know if it’s — if you’ll like it,” the villain said quietly. Their whole face was probably blushing but the emptiness they felt inside of their heart was even worse.

It wasn’t an emptiness towards the hero. It was an emptiness towards themselves. There wasn’t even one thing the villain liked about themselves. How the hell was someone else supposed to love them then?

They weren’t as uncomfortable as they used to be. Now, the villain could actually hide — under oversized clothes, in the dark of the night, behind a mask…it was all the same eventually. It was better than the past but it wasn’t good. The villain didn’t know why the hero liked them. It was probably out of pity. Maybe?

“I love it already. I love your body,” the hero answered without hesitation. “May I?”

They had the fabric of the villain’s shirt between their fingers, ready to take it off.

The villain looked up at them as they felt their heartbeat speed up. It almost hurt. What if the hero didn’t like them? What if they weren’t what the hero needed. What if the villain wasn’t enough? They swallowed.

“Why do you like me?” the villain asked.

“Because I do. You make me happy. You understand me. You care for me. You don’t hit me. That’s all I ask for.”

The villain still hesitated. But the hero continued.

“And I love your body. You’re beautiful. You’re hot. I want to devour you. I want to make you feel good. Please let me make you feel good.”

The villain blushed even more, if that was possible.

“Do you trust me?” the hero asked. Yes.

“Yeah. Okay. Please, just…be slow, okay?”

“Of course, baby.”

The shirt fell to the ground. And with that, the villain’s insecurities followed agonisingly tedious over the blissful night.

[leciraofthewilderness]

Hello, fellow autistic adult! I was going to just write a comment but apparently it got too long. Idk if I’m any good at giving advice, but I’ll try, just based on things that have helped me in the past, including when deep in burnout last year. Some of these things may be too basic, but I mean them genuinely in case they haven’t come to mind. And some may not be possible in your circumstances, or may be too specific to me and my traits and hard to generalize. But I hope this at least could help a little:

- Block out whatever sensory things might be bothering you. Maybe do that even if you don’t think there’s a sensory thing bothering you. Sometimes I just feel emotionally overwhelmed and stressed about things I need to do and I think that’s all it is and then I put on some big ear defenders and I feel so much more calm. Use whatever sensory blocking things you normally use or try something different. Like I mostly use earplugs or noise cancelling headphones, but sometimes the ear defenders feel the best and the slight extra pressure on the sides of my head can be helpful in addition to the noise blocking.

- Rather than blocking sensory input out, try choosing some specific input. For example, playing a specific song on repeat for a while (or maybe a few songs interspersed in case the variety is helpful). Or for another example, do some visual stimming if that’s something you enjoy (I particularly enjoy looking at colored liquids through glass, or looking at the rainbow-y patterns you can get by shining bright light at something like a phone screen or by tilting some eyeglasses or sunglasses at the right angle, or looking at light on/through moving leaves).

- If you haven’t done some big stims (e.g. rocking or flapping) in a while, do that. If you don’t have much energy, stim while lying down. For example, I like to alternate pressing my toes against the my bed in a cat-like kneading motion.

- Spend as much continuous time as you can (without neglecting basic needs) on whatever your main interest/hyperfixation is at the moment. But in a low-energy way, like just reading fanfic, or playing a game (but maybe just low key stuff like running around collecting things), or even just poking around a wiki or something.

- If possible, for some period of time, reduce the number of things you have to do and/or the number of steps those things take. Like if you get food by cooking, stop doing that for some time, and just get frozen meals or something else that requires fewer steps. If there are any basic life-maintenance tasks you can somehow get someone else’s help with for a while (without causing more socially-induced stress), try to do that. Also, if there are things you have to do (and if possible) it may be good to get someone else’s help with figuring out which things actually need to be done, what the simplest way to accomplish them is, and specific steps to take.

- This is maybe one to be careful with, and very dependent on circumstances, but I think if possible for some period of time, spend as little time as possible with people unless they’re people you feel totally safe and comfortable with, like people you can be fully yourself with (if you have anyone like that—I only have had a friend like that for less than a year at this point, and I’m in my late twenties, so I know that can be hard to find). I feel like “avoid people” in particular is not something most non-autistic people would approve of as self-care, but I think it can be a valid option if too much social interaction where you have to mask your autism is a source of stress…

- Also, if talking takes too much energy, maybe prioritize interacting with people through text, or just being in the same space together without talking.

I’m not sure if this is the kind of thing you were looking for at all, but I hope these can at least be a starting point for other ideas…

Me: Miss Internet, I’ve been having a tough time lately. Could you please show me some relaxation and self care tips for autistic adults?

Internet: you should try ABA to learn to mask better :)

Me: ????

[astaroth1357]

How Often They Worry about MC…

For those who don’t know, I have a little dog named Charlie and she is a large portion of my world. There's no need to be alarmed, my dog is fine, but there are days where I hold her and all I can think about is how much I worry about her health down the line… I suppose we often do that for the people we love, particularly the ones who may not last as long as we will. Take that as inspiration if you'd like.

Lucifer 

Near constantly. 

If you tracked his blood pressure on a grid, you'd see it start to continuously rise about when he decided they were worth having in his life.

Lucifer is the eldest sibling to a whole crew of brothers so he's no stranger to worry. He worried about his brothers when they were young, he worried about them after the Fall, and he still worries about them now (even if he's less open about it).

But a part of him knows that his brothers can handle their own, at least to varying degrees. The MC, though? He's far less sure…

They've proven rather resilient, but also headstrong and reckless. Neither of which are good things to be in a place this dangerous...

If Lucifer isn't careful, he can catch himself staring at a wall or window just wondering where they are and if they're doing alright… If he called them every time he had a passing worry, their inbox would be full by the end each week.

He holds himself back because he doesn't have the time to constantly protect them, but that doesn't stop him from sending a text once or twice a day. They better respond or he'll start (secretly) panicking.

Mammon

He forgets their mortality from time to time, but every time he remembers it hits like a ton of bricks…

Mammon is a pretty "in-the-moment" person. He doesn't spend a lot of time dwelling on the future, but whenever he does the thought of losing MC always comes back to him again and again.

Like. It's gotta happen eventually, right? They're human, humans die, hell they don't even live that long to start with!

The MC can always tell when Mammon's getting worried because he'll get uncharacteristically quiet and pace around or hover by them…

Every little injury or strenuous task will suddenly seem like too much to him as well. 

If they need to carry some boxes, he'll carry them all.

If they have to jog to class, he's carrying them. 

If they so much as get a papercut, he'll have a heart attack.

It's not very hard to get Mammon out of these funks - he really does want them to reassure him that they're okay - but he's never going to get fully over it…

Not until he can steal whatever top secret immortality formula Solomon must have used anyway… He'll get it off that bastard eventually.

Leviathan

Thinks about it so often he has to actively try not to just to get any peace…

He dodges his fears for MC like a protagonist dodges lasting consequences. Every time he feels one creeping up, he's always got a distraction waiting…

"Hey where's MC at? I hope they didn't fall into the riv-OH HEY CHECK OUT THIS NEW GAME!!"

"What are they doing over there…? That looks hard, what if they bre-WAIT DIDN'T MY FAVORITE VOICE ACTOR JUST RELEASE A NEW PODCAST???"

"What if the MC dies tomorrow and they leave me all alo-DEVIL FIGHT 200! YOU CAN'T BEAT DEVIL FIGHT 200, LET’S BREAK MY HIGH SCORE!!"

Cut him some slack, his psyche cannot handle the idea of losing them on top of everything else he grapples with every day.

If, on the rare occasion, he does let himself fall down that rabbit hole he becomes extra clingy and practically begs MC not to leave his room… like ever. He'd bubble wrap them if he could.

Anytime they get really hurt or really sick he refuses to leave their side even if it means he has to awkwardly sit on the floor. He just needs to be able to glance at them every so often to be sure they're alive… Still breathing?? Phew…

Satan

He worries, preps, rationalizes, then worries again…

For Satan, knowledge is power and every scrap of information he can learn about MC is more power he can use to keep them safe and healthy.

Yes, he will want their medical history. Yes, he's going to need a list of prescriptions. Family members too. And no, you do not get a choice.

He'll read up on as many things as he can - pawn medical journals off of witches and get magical alternatives from Solomon.

The cycle usually goes: 

1. He's lying awake at night because he just heard about some terrible bacteria that makes human's skin peel off or something.

2. He does all the research he can on this bacteria, its treatment options, best prevention methods, etc.

3. Gets right about to break out the rubber booties for MC to wear around, then realizes they have a very slim chance of catching said bacteria since it's only native to incredibly remote parts of Indonesia.

4. Feels instant relief that MC will probably not catch flesh-eating bacteria and can finally sleep again…

5. Hears of some other human medical horror from Solomon and starts to worry…

It's a vicious cycle indeed… But at least he's getting a lot of medical training. Soon enough he'll be the Devildom's version of a human vet (which I guess is just a doctor, come to think of it. 🤔)

Asmodeus 

Lives so "here-and-now" that he doesn't remember often, but when he does it's always heartbreaking…

Asmo usually tries to worry about things as little as possible. It’s bad for the skin, you know? But when the MC is involved, all of that goes out the window.

Like how a delicate blossom eventually wilts in the snow, the MC is bound to leave them in time… Usually there's supposed to be something beautiful in that kind of tragedy, but perhaps he's just too close to them to find any romance in it.

The thought of their death gives him breakouts and anytime they get hurt or sick he's the first brother to offer them comfort. Every time.

Because he doesn't feel like he's as physically strong as he brothers, he tries to make up for it by minding their health in other ways. Anything to keep his MC strong and beautiful as always!

If Asmo is in a worrying mood, then he may also compensate by trying to take the MC out to a party or some fun event. Why sit around worrying by himself when he could be making memories with them now, right?

Beelzebub

It comes in waves, mostly at night.

When your thoughts throughout the day are mostly, "I wish I wasn't so hungry," it doesn't afford you a lot of time to think about much else.

In a way, it's a good thing since he experiences a lot less stress. But those worries are still there and they mostly plague his dreams…

Beel doesn’t feel hungry when he's sleeping, so a lot of his fears will make themselves known overnight. An injured or dying MC is often in his rotation of nightmares though, of course, he'd rather it not be…

After having one of these dreams, his first instinct is to always make sure the MC is okay. If they're with him, he'll hug them and check their heartbeat. If they're somewhere else, he'll go to them or shoot a text.

He has woken up without realizing his nightmare was all a dream though, and usually it's up to Belphie or MC themselves to console him while he cries… It's so heartbreaking, sweet boy just puts a lot of pressure on himself to be sure they're safe…

When he worries, it's like they're the most beautiful and expensive China set in a room full of bulls and hammers. If he could tape them to his side, he probably would. He gets scared for them that much…

Belphegor 

More scared about it than anyone else in the House.

Despite his calm demeanor, Belphie is truly afraid of losing his loved ones beneath the surface… He's already lost one of his most dear siblings before, going through that again may just break him.

Unfortunately, he's also felt just how fragile the MC is firsthand... He's not even the strongest of his brothers, yet he was able to snuff them out so easily… Who's to say someone else won't try?

Like Beel, MC's death is a recurring nightmare for him but he can usually shake off his dreams fairly well, if not change them mid-sleep. More scary is when something is actually wrong with them or they're not feeling well.

Belphie always sets his inner laziness aside for the MC when he can. If they get sick, he'll usually be right along with his family to take care of them - even if he has to skip school to do so (not that he cares about class anyway).

When he's worrying about them, he tries to play it off at first, but soon enough they'll notice him acting overly concerned and losing sleep… Best to calm him down before he starts getting cranky.

[that1awkwardsam]

Random Conversation Starters

“So it’s not like I actually want a snake, but more like I want a snake jus tbecause I don’t seem like the type of person that would have one.”

“Excuse you, I am great at being a third wheel.”

“What if he thinks of you as more than a friend?”

“We’re pretty sure she’s dead at this point but then she sits up and demands that we bring her a man.”

“Do you … do you ever think about what kind of weird roommate stories you would tell but you can’t think of any and you realize that it’s because you’re the weird roommate?”

“I don’t particularly care for cake.”

“So I was looking at conspiracy theories on the internet because, well, you know, and it turns out the middle ages might not even exist! I’m in the middle of reading a paper on it.”

“Who would I have a hickey from??”

“Y’all better hope I never pass out and need an IV. I will freak out if I wake up with something sticking in my arm.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa – someone’s in here!”

“You have to ask him because if I ask him, then he’d be going as my friend but if you ask him then he’d be going as your friend.”

“I’m only a little awkward sometimes.”

“Okay, but how do I tell him I like him without telling him I like him??”

“I don’t know how to describe it, but I just feel like your soul is like UUUUGGGHHHHHHHHHH.”

“Hi, yeah, I don’t like you. I mean I do, but just as friend. Will you please just chill so we can hang out again? Thanks.”

“You can try it but realistically speaking probably not.”

“It is not a hickey! It’s one of those airbrush tattoo things. I realize now that the placement and color may have been a mistake.”

“Well, first I’d have to wax my arm.”

“Mom, don’t worry, I have never done the sex or had the drugs or made the fun.”

“He told me I looked like a unicorn today and it made my heart so happy.”

“Don’t worry. I only cried a little.”

“No, I don’t wanna be her stupid boyfriend! But I don’t want anyone else to either.”

“It was then that I realized my mistake.”

“I’m not naming my child triangle!”

“The other one’s even harrier!”

“Technically it wasn’t on fire.”

“Listen - no listen. I want you to understand this. I do not care.”

“Wait, were you just like, flirting with me?”

“What the heck is a nougat?”

“Only thirty percent of all my jokes are dad jokes. The rest are memes and dark humor.”

“Which Dairy Queen story do you wanna hear first?”

“I’d better be getting a godchild out of this.”

“That’s not the only door you’ve broken.”

“I’ve averaged 1 & 1/2 meals for the past 3 days.”

“That’s the worst idea I’ve ever head. Let’s do it.”

“You guys are so cute. It’s disgusting.”

[multifandomlover01]

They’re My Sanitary Pads, Sir

Various (Guarnere, Toye, Liebgott, Makarkey, and Winters) x Female!Medic!Reader (Platonic) (Medic isn’t a huge part of it, though, you can pretend that’s not there if you want)

Word Count: ~2.9k

Disclaimer: takes place at Toccoa, but story may have them being at Toccoa longer than they actually were. It just suits the story. The setting; Currahee. Also, maybe Sobel just did this once? And it was later? And he kicked someone out for stealing…Let’s just pretend he did it a couple of time or whatever, ok? Also, just kind of ignore the history of sanitary/menstrual pads a bit. It mostly works, but it’s a bit iffy. Also, Winters may be XO a little earlier than reality. Sobel being a Captain…should fit???

Just, the timeline/some details aren’t accurate, alright? Deal with it.

Also…I do not own Band of Brothers, or any scenes or characters from it. All credit goes to the appropriate owners.

Also, per usual, this did not go the way it did in my head.

Key: Y/N/N = Your Nickname (shortened version of your name or other nickname), Y/L/N = Your Last Name

Warning: menstruation is discussed. If you are uncomfortable with this topic, please do not read. Also, please don’t be weird or gross about this. It’s a natural body process. I am not comfortable with it being sexualized by people I do not know, so please don’t sexualize it.

Being a female paratrooper was not an ideal situation. But it was a situation that you had found yourself in. Sobel worked you harder than he worked anyone else. Some of the other paratroopers didn’t treat you particularly well. And due to an aptitude test, you were chosen to be a medic. And that brought a whole new set of responsibilities and training you had to deal with.

Your living situation wasn’t great either. You were put in the regular barracks along with the guys. Though it was in a barrack with men who respected and liked you. So it wasn’t so bad.

Until one day when you woke up to disgruntled murmurs that progressed into a cacophony of displeasure, almost.

Sobel had done a contraband sweep, as you called it. He had gone through all your stuff, surprisingly without being caught, in the middle of the night. Seriously, how he managed that, you had no idea. Even though he was in fairly good shape (not really though? He was dedicated, though) and the CO, the guy probably couldn’t make his way through the obstacles course without some trouble, he was so clumsy. But he had done it. Maybe it was the seemingly longer, harder training day you had yesterday. Maybe he was trying to tire you all out so you’d sleep like babies and not be so easily disturbed. A lot of the guys were heavy sleepers anyway, though. Seriously, the snoring was almost unbearable at times. You took forever to get to sleep and the sound of about a dozen (?) snoring men didn’t help.

Once you were more awake and alert, you checked your stuff. The only thing the you could see that was missing were your sanitary pads.

They were supposed to be right under your bed, so you knew where they were. You didn’t hide it. You wanted easy access, so you just had them under your bed. Most of the men, especially those around you, didn’t really care. They never asked about it. They minded their own business.

Nothing else was missing. You checked your footlocker. Your clothes were all there (braziers and underwear were double checked). Some personal stuff that you had (letters, sentimental items) were still there. You were honestly surprised he hadn’t taken anything else from you. He took more from some others, a lot more.

As you were putting your things back in order, you noticed something on your bedsheet. You stood up and pulled the top sheet back.

Oh.

Oh no.

There was some blood on the sheets.

You then could feel wetness in your underwear and nether region (lol, sorry).

You checked once more for your pads, hoping they’d miraculously appear. They did not.

You quickly grabbed an extra pair of shorts and underwear that you had.

You stood up and cursed.

You stripped the sheet from the bed.

Most of the guys were too distracted by their own missing items to be paying attention to you up until this point. But the violent ripping the sheet from the bed turned a few heads.

Guarnere, who was very tough and intimidating, but surprisingly warm and friendly when it came to you, took particular note of your behavior.

He was in the bed next to yours and came over to you.

“What’s the matter, sweetheart?”

At first you weren’t sure you liked some of the nicknames that the guys gave you like “sweetheart”, “doll”, and “baby”. But you warmed up to it once it was clear they respected you and that it was a term of endearment because they liked you so much, not a derogatory thing because they didn’t think highly of you.

You huffed.

“Sobel stole my sanitary pads. And right when I need them.”

Toye, in the other bed next to you (you’re between Toye and Guarnere), heard you say this and stood up abruptly.

“He what?!”

“Why the hell would he do that?” Liebgott, in the bed across from you, asked.

You had nearly everyone’s attention at this point, it seemed.

“I doubt he knew what they were,” you tried to defend a bit, why would he know what they were? He wasn’t married, as far as you knew. Not that he talked about his personal life.

“That doesn’t mean he can just take them!” Liebgott had now crossed over to you, Toye, and Guarnere.

“And I’m sure he knew damn well what they were and took them anyway just to be a dick.” Toye growled.

“You don’t have to defend him. God knows he works you hard enough, Y/N/N,” Makarkey, in the bed across from Toye (and next to Liebgott), said, “and he had no right to take them.”

“He arguably had no right to take any of the stuff he took. Why’re you all getting so upset about the one thing of mine that he took?”

“He took my porno mag. Sure I’m pissed, but I don’t really need it. But he took your pads, and you need those.” - Toye

“And we get protective of you. You’re like a little sister. We care about you.” - Guarnere

“Thanks, guys. I appreciate it. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need a new sheet, I need to change clothes, and I need to stuff some toilet paper down there and pray it’s enough. It’ll probably show, but I don’t care at this point.”

You left the barracks and dropped by the laundry room and put the stuff that needed to be washed in your slot (pretend). You would wash it later. You grabbed a new sheet and headed back to the barracks.

Toye immediately snatched it from you.

“I’ll take care of this. You take care of you.”

He walked away before you could respond.

Assuming Toye would do as he said and change the sheet, you walked to the bathroom area.

There had to be a special toilet put in for you because all there was before to use were urinals. It was an outhouse of sorts right outside that was hooked up to the plumbing in the building.

It was actually fairly nice, all things considered. It was a bit bigger than a normal outhouse might be. There was certainly enough room for comfort. You could put your clothes on a little bench that was in there.

You stripped out of your underwear and shorts.

They were indeed bloody.

There was a pretty sizable stain on both articles of clothing.

You grabbed the new shorts and underwear, you sat on the toilet and slipped them on.

You used the restroom (peed and wiped).

You gathered up quite a bit of toilet paper and stuffed it in your underwear.

You stood up and pulled your pants up.

You looked down and checked.

It was a little noticeable, but not necessarily any more noticeable than a pad (maybe not realistic, but I don’t care).

You washed my hands, gathered up your dirty clothes and dropped those off at the laundry before heading back to the barracks.

When you walked in and got to your bed, you noticed Toye had indeed changed the sheets. You thanked him. He said you’re welcome (I don’t know how else to phrase this/we exchanged niceties?).

“You should tell Winters,” Don suggested.

“I don’t know. I don’t want to cause a fuss.”

“It’s not a fuss if Sobel’s in the wrong,” Liebgott reminded you.

“But what makes you think he’ll even give them back?”

“He might if Winters talks to him.”

“But he’s a stubborn man. If he took it with the intention to spite me, as he did with most of you, and not out of ignorance, then why would he just give it back?”

“You’ll never know until you ask.”

“I’ll go with you, if you want,” Don offered.

“You really don’t have to do that.”

“But you seem reluctant. And, I get it, it’s an embarrassing situation. But don’t you think you’d feel better to have it resolved? And don’t you think you’d feel better with someone there by your side?”

“We could all go with you,” Toye suggested.

“That doesn’t seem necessary.”

“We could skip Winters and just march right down to Sobel’s office and demand he give you your pads back,” Leibgott suggested.

“Now that really is unnecessary.”

“Why don’t you and I just talk to Winters, huh? Would that be alright?”

You nodded.

Don smiled.

“Alright, let’s go.”

“Right now? Shouldn’t breakfast be served soon? Shouldn’t PT start soon after that?”

“Eh, we’ve got time.”

“If you say so.”

You left to go find Winters.

You found him and, surprisingly, Nixon, in the mess hall, having coffee (Nixon’s most definitely had alcohol in it).

You stood before them.

“You two are up early,” Nixon observed.

“Everyone is, sir. Captain Sobel did a contraband check last night. We awoke this morning to discover it,” Don explained.

They both groaned.

“What’d he take this time?” Nixon bemoaned (distress, idk).

“Nix,” Winters warned/soothed, “what did he take this time?”

“Lots of things. He took something from nearly everyone. But there’s one really important and unfair thing he took, sir.”

They both glanced at you. They surmised it had something to do with you as Don was the one talking, but you had come with him.

“What is it?”

“He took my sanitary pads, sir. And I kind of need them.”

Nixon immediately became angered.

“That son of a-“

“Nix, Nix.”

“But he took her pads! He can’t just take her pads. Unreasonably taking stuff from the men is one thing, that is still unacceptable, but this is a whole other, even more unacceptable thing to have done.”

“I’ll handle it, alright? Private, will you come with me?”

You nodded and followed Winters out of the mess hall.

You headed towards the HQ building (one building?), where Sobel’s office was.

Winters looked over (and down, if you’re shorter/up if you’re taller) at you as you walked. He noticed your gait and your facial expressions. You were clearly uncomfortable.

“You alright?”

“Not really, sir. I awoke this morning to discover that my sanitary pads were missing. Not only that, but my bed and clothes had blood on them. He took my pads right when I needed them. I had to stuff toilet paper down there, sir.”

He placed a hand on your upper back and patted it sympathetically.

“We’ll get this sorted out. I promise.”

“Thank you, sir.”

You entered the HQ building and made your way to Sobel’s office.

Winters knocked on the door.

“Enter.”

You had to keep yourself from scoffing/laughing. But you both did share a smirk.

You entered the room.

Sobel was going over all the contraband. He had papers out and was reporting it and everything.

“Whatever this is about, you’re going to have to make it quick, as you can see, I’m quite busy.”

You suppressed a “mhm.”

“Sir, there has been a grievance about your…activities last night.”

“A necessary contraband check was carried out, yes. And I’m sure there are many grievances. After all, how can these men expect to live without a pornographic magazine or two dozen Hershey bars?”

“Sir, as the CO of the Company, you are technically allowed to do whatever you want, as long as it is not cruel or…unusual…and is for the good of the men. But there was one specific item that was taken that is very important and that should not have been taken.”

“Let me guess, it’s what I took from you, Private?”

“Yes, sir,” your voice came out small.

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear you, Private.”

“Yes, sir,” thankfully it came out louder.

“That’s better, now what is your grievance with what I took from you?”

“You took my sanitary pads, sir,” back to being a bit quiet, but not as quiet as before.

“Private Y/L/N, if I am to understand you, you must speak up.”

“You took my sanitary pads, sir,” this was a horrible situation. You were trying so hard not to cry.

“Your sanitary pads?”

“Yes, sir.”

“You mean the infirmary’s sanitary pads.”

You were dumbfounded. He actually didn’t know what they were. He thought they were from the infirmary. Did he even check? He thinks you stole them?

“N-no, sir. I brought them from home. Those are my pads. They’re for-“

You stopped. You couldn’t just tell him what they were for. It was a private matter and he clearly didn’t know what they were. And you were already about to cry.

“They’re for what, Private?”

You sighed.

“Menstruation, sir.”

“What?”

“Menstruation, sir,” you repeated louder.

“I heard you the first time. What do you mean?”

Oh, so now he heard you?!

“Sir, I-I’m not sure I should be the one to explain this to you.”

“What are you talking about? I told you to tell me what they’re for, Private, now I’m giving you an order and I expect you to follow it,” and, then, under his breath, but Winters and I still heard it, “this is why they never should’ve let a woman into the Army.”

“Captain Sobel, I believe you’ve put Private Y/L/N through enough already, if you could just give her sanitary pads back to her, we’ll be on our way.”

“When I want your opinion, Lieutenant, I’ll ask for it.”

Winters looked just about ready to deck Sobel.

Sobel looked at you, expectantly.

You sighed. Tried to steady your breathing, but failed. You were still about ready to cry.

“Sir, menstruation is a natural process the female body goes through. It’s when, after ovulation, which is a natural process where an egg is released from the Fallopian tube and goes to the uterus, the egg is not fertilized, it sheds blood and tissue that exits the body, resulting in bleeding for 3-7 days about every 28 days. I need the pads, sir, so the blood can be absorbed by it and not the toilet paper currently replacing it. Also so I don’t, just, bleed everywhere.”

Sobel actually fainted.

You and Winters looked at each other before rushing to him.

“Sir, are you alright?”

“I’m fine. I’m fine!”

You sat him in his chair.

He took a minute to recover. When he did, he pointed to where your pads were.

“Just take them.”

You did.

“Thank you, sir.”

“Now leave, please.”

“Yes, sir.”

No “You’re welcome”.

No “I’m sorry”.

At least he said please.

You and Winters, against your better judgement, shared a giggle when you had left his office.

Winters escorted you to the outhouse and waited outside while you changed.

The toilet paper had actually done a decent job in the hour you had it down there (not that realistic, but just pretend, ok? I swear I’m girl and I swear I actually menstruate, ok?)

You happily put it in the toilet as you put a pad down there instead.

You washed your hands and exited the outhouse.

Winters was still outside.

“Everything alright now?”

“Absolutely. Thank you, sir.”

“You’re quite welcome.”

He escorted you back to the barracks.

You were immediately crowded. Smiles and laughter erupted when they saw you had your box of pads.

“So he gave them back to you?” Liebs asked.

“Obviously.”

“How’d ya do it?” Don asked.

“Well, Lieutenant Winters did most of the work.”

“You did some of the work, too, Private.”

“So, what did he say? How did it go?” Toye asked.

“I got them back,” you said as you pushed your way through the crowd, “isn’t that enough?”

“We wanna know what happened.” Bill pressed.

You put them back underneath your bed.

“I can’t tell you.”

“Why not?” Liebgott asked.

“I just can’t, ok?”

Everyone already hated Sobel. Him taking your pads just made them hate him more. And while you didn’t like the man, having something over him and using it against him isn’t becoming of a soldier in the Army. To blackmail one’s superior officer or to talk about him behind his back isn’t either. You couldn’t tell them that Sobel didn’t know what the pads were (you had only assumed before) and you also couldn’t tell them he fainted upon being told what they were for.

“What the hell happened?” Toye asked.

“He gave me my pads back.”

“And that’s all?” Don asked.

“Yes.”

“So, he just gave them back, just like that?” Liebgott asked.

You nodded, “yeah.”

“I don’t believe it.” Bill said.

“Well, you better believe it, cause it’s what happened.”

“There’s no way he just gave you your pads back. You didn’t have to fight him?” Toye asked.

“No,” you chuckled, “how would I even have done that?”

“We’ll, it’s easy,” Liebgott started, “you just raise your arm, pull it back, clench your hand into a fist, and then you bring your arm forward, fast and hard, so it makes contact with Sobel’s face.”

You chuckled again.

“And get kicked out of the regiment? No, thank you!”

“I still can’t believe he just willingly gave them back,” Don said.

“Well, he did. So could you all just drop it?”

“Did he even actual know what they were?” Bill asked.

Oop. There it was. That question. The one you didn’t want to answer.

“What does it really matter? I got them back.”

“Wait…did he really not know what they were?” Toye asked, almost giddy.

There’s another. You didn’t answer at first. And your hesitation was taken as confirmation.

“He didn’t, did he?” Liebgott asked, also seemingly very happy about this revelation.

They again took your silence as confirmation.

“Ho ho! That’s rich!”

“Finally we have something over him for once.”

“You guys can’t say anything about it!”

“And why the hell not?”

“I know he can be a huge dick, but he’s still our CO. You can’t tell people he didn’t know what sanitary pads were. He’s a guy! It’s not his fault! It’s not as if women are encouraged to discuss these things. You guys were just close to girlfriends and siblings, right?”

They grumbled an affirmative.

“Maybe he didn’t have the same situation as you guys. It’s not his fault he didn’t know. I got them back. That’s all that matters. I really just want to let this whole thing go and put it behind me, ok?”

They all grumbled an “ok”.

“Ok. Good.”

[finish]