#within da plot of the playlist…. | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

radicalrascals · 2 months ago

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The Lost Son

Original Character | FC: Wagner Moura

Threads | Headcanons | Aesthetics | Open Starters

NAME: João Oliveira

AGE: in his 30s

SPECIES: human (or plot dependent)

PROFESSION: Corporate Tech

Short Bio

João was born in Brazil but moved to the US when he was a teenager. His father was absent from his childhood, potentially just another punter of his mother's. João worked hard to build his own life, and though he loves his mother dearly, he doesn't want to be associated with her milieu. He pursued a career in the corporate tech industry, and doesn't shy away from engaging in corporate espionage and sabotage, blackmail and manipulation to have his way. Eventually he managed to find his father, aiming to take him down as a way to repay him for all the years he didn't give a fuck about João and his mother.

It's very plot dependent who João's father is. He can play a tiny role, or a big one. He can be related to your muse, he could be supernatural, anything goes. He might have other children who got to grow up with him, so João might have more targets for his vendetta. If we're shipping, please note that I am NOT comfortable with incest.

Relationships

Henrique de Souza > [Tag] | [Ship]

Playlist

The Devil Within by Digital Daggers from Close Your Eyes (2013)

E for Extinction by Thousand Foot Krutch from Welcome to the Masquerade (2009)

The World is Not Enough by Garbage from The World is Not Enough (1999)

You’re Going Down by Sick Puppies from Tri-Polar (2009)

The Invisible Plan by Kidneythieves from The Invisible Plan (2011)

Detailed Profile

FULL NAME: Caio João Oliveira Novaes

KNOWN AS: João Oliveira

NICKNAMES: Johnny, Joca, Cai, Fogo (by Henrique)

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SPECIES: human (or plot dependent)

RESIDENCE: plot-dependent

PROFESSION: Executive Technical Assistant in Corporate Tech

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AGE: in his 30s

DATE OF BIRTH: July 21st

PLACE OF BIRTH: Salvador da Bahia, Brazil

NATIONALITY: Brazilian-American

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PARENTS: Bruna "Bambi" Oliveira Novaes & [unknown father]

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FACE CLAIM: Wagner Moura

HEIGHT: 5ft 11 (1.80m)

NOTABLE FEATURES: ?

STYLE: João wears a suit in his work environment and switches into a boring t-shirt and jeans combo in his free time. He doesn't have a real interest in fashion, but he knows he looks good and can definitely show it.

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LANGUAGES: Portuguese (native), English (fluent)

SPEECH MANNERISM: He has a strong Baiano accent when speaking Portuguese and a very generic "standard" American accent with no hint of a Portuguese lilt when he speaks English, albeit a tendency to pronounce "s" as "sh" before plosives.

STRENGTHS: cunning, tech savvy, strategic, profound coding skills, ambitious

WEAKNESSES: jealous, petty, vindictive, overly emotional, conceited, reckless

INTERESTS: revenge, swimming

VICES: compulsive liar, vengeful

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NSFW

João is romantically and sexually attracted to men and women. He's not interested in a long-term relationship, as he thinks it would only get in the way of his plans. Should he fall in love after all, he'll try to find a middle ground between his love life and his machinations, and perhaps even involve them if he trusts them enough.

Bonus points for muses with the following face claims: Selton Mello, Lazaro Rámos, Camila Pitanga, Alice Braga, Clemens Schick

#Muse: João #Muses

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audiofictionuk · 2 months ago

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New Fiction Podcasts - 2nd November 2024 - Part 1

Hildy the Barback and the Lake of Fire Audio Drama When an evil force threatens to incinerate the fantastical land of Golgorath, it's up to Hildy the Barback and her friends to kick some ass on a comedic quest to save the world. Oh, also there are lots of dragons. Melissa McCarthy leads an all-star cast, including Ben Falcone, Octavia Spencer, Glenn Close, and more, in Hildy the Barback and the Lake of Fire, a legendary adventure you won’t want to miss! Featuring original music in every episode, it's a hilarious extravaganza of epic proportions. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241025-01 RSS: https://www.omnycontent.com/d/playlist/796469f9-ea34-46a2-8776-ad0f015d6beb/b9faff99-0415-4160-bdf7-b1fd0118afb7/b72a6ac6-adfd-440a-ae2d-b1fd01196597/podcast.rss

Tales from the Stuffer Shack Audio RPG They're not even supposed to be here today! Tales from the Stuffer Shack is a re-release of 2017's hit Shadowrun actual play podcast that follows two Stuffer Shack employees as they get drawn into a sinister plot that could only exist in the Sixth World. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241025-02 RSS: https://feeds.megaphone.fm/stuffershack

Udenfor Sæsonen Audio Book Udenfor Sæsonen er en “vælg-din-egen-vej”-krimi, hvor du som læser selv skal vælge det næste kapitel i fortællingen. Jesper er midt i trediverne og lever et småtrivielt liv i en lejlighed på Østerbro med sin kæreste Nina. Deres forhold er stagneret i en uopfyldt drøm om at få børn, og fremtiden føles ligeså spændende som en gråvejrsdag. Jesper lukker øjnene for de virkelige problemer, der langsomt stikker hovedet frem. Med opfordring fra en Hella Joof-podcast beslutter det unge par, at tage på en romantisk tur til Hvide Sande. Det sker da Jesper pludseligt arver et sommerhus fra en farfar, han næsten havde glemt. De tager afsted i håbet om at genskabe gnisten i deres forhold – eller i det mindste finde noget, der ligner en mening med livet. Men det viser sig hurtigt, at sommerhuset gemmer på mere end blot en støvet arv. Hvad der starter som en simpel tur til Vesterhavet, udvikler sig til en satirisk og surrealistisk rejse ind i Jespers egen fortid og fremtid. I en fortælling, der balancerer mellem tragikomik og gys, må Jesper navigere gennem bizarre situationer, hemmeligheder fra fortiden og absurde optrin, der får hans liv til at minde om en B-film fyldt med mareridtsagtige optrin og skæve eksistenser. De når nemlig kun lige at få pakket de chokolade-dyppede jordbær ud, før Nina bliver kidnappet af en underlig kult. "Udenfor Sæsonen" er en satirisk fortælling om identitet, skæbne og de drømme, vi ofte gemmer væk, når virkeligheden bliver for krævende – fortalt som en “vælg-din-egen-vej”-krimi. Du er hovedkarakteren, og du skal selv vælge hvilken vej historien udvikler sig. Måske Jesper med lidt hjælp udefra kan blive bedre til at tage de svære valg i livet - hvis du tør? https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241025-03 RSS: https://www.spreaker.com/show/6314410/episodes/feed

Legends Unrolled Audio RPG Welcome to Legends Unrolled! We tell stories using TTRPG games in collaboration with a rotating cast of actors, writers and improvisers.From gritty audio dramas to live shows and even some D&D Q&A, there's sure to be something here for you. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241011-08 RSS: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/a-war-for-ages

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Misfortunate Misfits Audio RPG We are a group of misfits causing chaos, humor, and love every D&D session!!! https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241010-04 RSS: https://media.rss.com/misfortunate-misfits/feed.xml

Severed Fate Audio RPG In the dark, canopied Shudderwood Forest, three heroes must somehow prevent the violent werewolves residing within from descending into all-out war, while each struggling with their own conflicts of destiny vs. self-determination. From the award-winning sound-designer behind The Dimension Door podcast, Severed Fate launched in October of 2024. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241024-01 RSS: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/severed-fate

The Mystical Ones Audio Book Welcome to the world of the Horror-Thriller fiction "The Mystical Ones". When Jason Bender is chased by the "Los Vengadores" gang members, he signs a pact with the devil to survive. But Jason has just signed his pact to enter a gigantic mysterious world of combat between the good sorcerers named the white sorcerers and the bad sorcerers named the black sorcerers. "The Mystical Ones" is a horror-thriller which revisits the Senegalese folklore as well as explores the close resemblance on the manifestation of witchcraft and spirituality and their contrast. The story takes place in Los Angeles. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241008-05 RSS: https://anchor.fm/s/fbce7aec/podcast/rss

CUANDO EL DESIERTO HABLA Audio Drama Siempre hemos imaginado cómo será el futuro. ¿Pero sabías que nuestro Desierto de Atacama está dando valiosas pistas de cómo ese futuro podría ser más amigable y auspicioso? Te invitamos a anticipar ese mañana posible desde lo que hoy, personas innovadoras de la Región de Antofagasta, en Chile, ya están descubriendo y explorando.OYEDÍ ESTUDIO presenta CUANDO EL DESIERTO HABLA, una serie de audioficciones basadas en emprendimientos o investigaciones reales. Aquí, imaginamos cómo esos mismos proyectos podrían desarrollarse en unas décadas más.Además de oyedi.cl, puedes escuchar también este ciclo en distintas emisoras radiales de la Provincia de Antofagasta o en tu plataforma de streaming de podcast preferida.CUANDO EL DESIERTO HABLA es un proyecto apoyado por el Comité Corfo Antofagasta. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241008-06 RSS: https://www.spreaker.com/show/6340434/episodes/feed

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The Rosy Mirror: neo-noir paranormal audio fiction. Audio Book We proudly present our first symphony in prose,SILENCE FELL: the saga of Cadence Cheerslaughter.An epic of beauty and suffering in dark Los Angeles.Murder, lust, betrayal, fate . . . even the supernatural. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241008-07 RSS: https://media.rss.com/rosy-mirror/feed.xml

Cyphers Edge Audio Book Ulf Whitlock, a feldreal bounty hunter, tracks and eliminates targets too dangerous or obscure for the police to handle. Near future with a fantasy twist, orcs, elves and cybernetic limbs. It's all here... https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241020-02 RSS: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/2402311.rss

Chimera Protection Agency Audio Drama Abominations have roamed the earth for millions of years. Then they seemed to disappear overnight, until it was discovered that not only did they not disappear, but were thriving, continuing to hunt among us and hide. To combat these monsters, a top secret global agency was created to combat this threat. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241019-01 RSS: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/chimera-protection-agency

100 Club - Scum and Villainy Actual Play Audio RPG A Sci-fantasy Scum and Villainy homebrew campaign set in the year 3073, the Sol System is a very different place, but a lot of things remain the same. With gangsters, corrupt cops and politicians; the authorities can barely contain criminals throughout the system. They seek bounty hunters that achieve the prestige to bring in the really big bounties… https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241016-04 RSS: https://www.spreaker.com/show/6100385/episodes/feed

Kingmakers Audio RPG The lush otherworld of Din is desiccated to desert after an heir uses debt magic to relieve a kingdom-wide drought. After the King is assassinated, two brothers and their wards flee from the uprising that follows. Kingmakers is an improvised tale of power and purpose, pain and perseverance- and the legacy of legends. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241015-09 RSS: https://www.spreaker.com/show/6100391/episodes/feed

Nimrod Audio Drama NIMROD is a five-act brute-farce in verse! It’s a ridiculously chilling blend of Julius Caesar, Ubu Roi and The Simpsons Movie that follows an imagined final year of a criminal businessman’s presidency (the Nimrod administration) through the eyes of Lani, its beleaguered Slovenian First Lady. Is it a ribald comedy? A brutal tragedy? Will language itself devolve into madness and lies? And what does a radioactive pig have to do with the fate of the free world? https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241016-05 RSS: https://feeds.simplecast.com/FHIo_EOm

Autumn - An Audio Drama Audio Drama Jade Adler has worked for wellness influencer Autumn Gandara for years, believing that they’re helping people feel healthier and making the world a better place. But when Autumn launches a new supplement powder without Jade’s input and customers report strange side effects, Jade’s belief in Autumn and their mission falters. The more she investigates, the stranger things become, pulling her into a dangerous and supernatural conspiracy where wellness has a price. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241028-01 RSS: https://feeds.libsyn.com/541462/rss

Redemptions Quest: The Holy Grail Audio Book In “Redemption’s Quest: The Holy Grail,” Sir Galahad embarks on a perilous journey to reclaim the lost Holy Grail and restore its divine message to a broken Camelot. Alongside allies old and new, he battles dark sorcerers and confronts personal demons, discovering that redemption and hope lie within the Grail’s power. “Redemption’s Quest: The Holy Grail” follows Sir Galahad, a once-pure knight burdened by past failures, as he undertakes an epic quest to retrieve the Holy Grail and renew Camelot’s fading glory. Joined by Dr. Faustus, a man seeking atonement for a demonic pact; Selene, a succubus striving for redemption; and the wise Pope Benedict, they face relentless dark forces and ancient evils. Through trials and tribulations, they learn the true meaning of sacrifice, love, and unity. The Grail’s power heals their land and spirits, promising a brighter future for Camelot. As they confront formidable adversaries, they must protect the Grail and its divine message, realizing that redemption is possible for all who seek it. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241003-05 RSS: https://feeds.castos.com/k91w5

Midnight Rush Audio RPG While the job market has gone to shit, a mysterious company funding “cleaning services” pops up. They say the turn around is killer and they need a new crew. What they don’t know, is that it’ll be the messiest job of their lives. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240930-06 RSS: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/midnight-rush

Chaosium All Stars Audio RPG A collection of Chaosium liveplays, featuring some of the many stars in TTRPG gaming. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241001-09 RSS: https://anchor.fm/s/fbb612e0/podcast/rss

Aquella Mujer Audio Drama Una historia de una mujer que es ambiciosa, infame. Aquella mujer es un ser que nació sin alma. Historia de vida que les va a encantar. Novela Mexicana que llega a ustedes para cautivarlos y que les advierte que las historias de Aquella Mujer pueden pasar en la vida real. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240930-08 RSS: https://feeds.simplecast.com/pEbbr8_c

The Thirteenth Coven Audio Drama The Thirteenth Coven is a chilling narrative podcast that follows Joel Alden as he unearths the dark, forgotten history of Saint Ashford. As Joel delves deeper into the town’s mysterious past, he uncovers eerie secrets about an ancient coven, supernatural forces, and the strange disappearances that have haunted the town for generations. What begins as a search for the truth soon spirals into something far more dangerous. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241011-09 RSS: https://anchor.fm/s/fb5be874/podcast/rss

Darkwave Latina Audio Drama When Rio finds herself undead, it sets her on a journey where the answers she seeks are buried in her past. Through clues that loop her memory back and forth, Rio re-discovers her adolescent goth roots and takes the listener on a journey exploring her Latina family life. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241018-03 RSS: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/2411917.rss

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American Doom Audio Drama Victoria Collins hosts this deep-dive investigation into mysterious corporation Terordyne, presented through a six episode first season with episodic series, shorts, and music in a comedic and surrealist world. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241004-07 RSS: https://media.rss.com/american-doom/feed.xml

The Field Audio Drama Welcome to The Field. This is an audio mystery set in the small town of Llanantwm. The story unfolds during a unique moment in the town's history, and while we would all like a neat, ordered understanding of what took place during these times, this is not what happened. Collected from various sources, The Field is an opportunity to dive deep into the world and make the story from the fragments that exist. Listen, decide and create… https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241028-02 RSS: https://anchor.fm/s/fbf9d048/podcast/rss

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The Cascade Radio Hour Audio Drama The Cascade Radio Hour is a horror audio-play podcast. Follow the host, Kief Cascade, as he spins a yarn of horror and hilarity that comes to life as the story goes on. Will you survive the night? https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241027-01 RSS: https://media.rss.com/the-cascade-radio-hour/feed.xml

The Doorstep Project Audio Drama A tour guide at the Library of Lost Things records exhibits in an attempt to make their library more accessible. A new weekly podcast from Family Friendly Podcasts that performs stories from around the world, written by AJ, the production crew, and the audience. Join Leilani and Gavin as they unravel the layers of their world and learn the secrets behind lost artifacts. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241023-02 RSS: https://feeds.redcircle.com/db8cc4be-416a-42f7-841a-66cf84d2667b

O COPO AZUL Audio Drama Clóvis e Madalena, um casal de meia idade, abalado por um terrível acontecimento, tenta seguir com sua rotina, quando fatos perturbadores começam abalar os moradores do lugar e trazem à tona a verdade terrível sobre a tragédia que aconteceu com eles. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241019-02 RSS: https://anchor.fm/s/fc64bdb8/podcast/rss

Midnight Straight Up Audio Book Chilling stories that merge vintage horror with a modern edge. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241027-02 RSS: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/2416116.rss

El espectro de tu mente Audio Drama Un periodista y una investigadora de lo paranormal se unen para descubrir diferentes misterios, lo que encuentran generalmente desafía toda lógica y los lleva a cuestionar la línea que divide la ficción y la realidad. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241019-03 RSS: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/el-espectro-de-tu-mente

Arcadia Valley Theatre Guild Audio Drama The Arcadia Valley Theatre Guild (Arcadia, Missouri) is a community theatre organization designed to enrich, educate and entertain our community by providing excellent theatre experiences. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241022-03 RSS: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/arcadia-valley-theatre-guild

Family Tape Tree Audio Drama ”Family Tape Tree” is a surreal and absurd fictional podcasted rooted in the world of the improvisational jam band, Phish. It follows Lexi, a sensitive and surly teen, who discovers her deceased father’s collection of Phish cassette tapes from the ’90s while packing for college. Through ”grief magic” Lexi travels into the tapes and relives those memories with younger versions of her parents and their friends. Over the course of several groove-based-psychedelic-infused-head-bobbing-adventures with the memory of her late father, Lexi learns to come to terms with his death and is able to look forward to her future. As much a story about loss and love as it is about parking lot grilled cheeses and heady jams, “Family Tape Tree” takes the listener through Phish’s vast history, to follow the story of a group of friends, a band, and the impossible task of processing loss. Absurd caricatures from the parking lot, toe-tapping grooves, and a sudden urge to call your parents; “Family Tape Tree” has something for everyone! https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20241028-03 RSS: https://feed.podbean.com/familytapetree/feed.xml

#audio fiction #fiction podcast

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skarsgard-daydreams · 4 years ago

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Voices Carry

Ch. 10: “Comfortably Numb”

Description: Merkel accepts a job to smuggle a young woman out of East Berlin, and it turns out to be more than he bargained for.

Warnings: angst, blood, references to suicide, references to depression, poor grasp of the German language, possible historical liberties, probable sexual content in the (near) future

Notes: If the added warnings for this chapter are a major problem for you, I want you to know that you can message me if you have questions about the content before you read, and also that you can safely skip this one. You will not be lost when I post the next chapter. I promise. I have a playlist of my chapter title songs. This one is #10, “Comfortably Numb” by Pink Floyd. Thank you @scxrsgxrd for test reading for me. If you haven’t read her Merkel fic, you’re missing out.

In the darkness, Merkel lay awake and wondered what kind of man he was. He held Irina in his arms, his fingertips brushing the ends of her hair idly as his mind fixed on the things he should have done differently. If he had been honest with her from the start, maybe he could have made her understand without ever having to hurt her. Without becoming one more force set in motion against her. He wanted to tell her he had never meant to cause her pain, but the words sounded too much like an excuse, and they remained stuck in his throat.

He watched her face as she slept, serene now, free from the darkness that hid behind her eyes when he brought her back to the apartment. She had shut down completely. Whether it was her fear of him, or her sorrow for her father, or her body simply slipping into shock from the freezing weather, he didn’t know. Whatever it was, it felt familiar to Merkel. The wall he had built up within himself was starting to fall, piece by piece. Each time he faced her grief, it threatened to wake his own lying dormant within him. And even though it hurt, he couldn’t tear himself away.

He remembered it in fragments, each of them so clear, but he could never piece together the whole picture in his mind, as though something within him had been shattered that day and could never be reassembled. He was sitting in the stairwell of the old apartment in Mitte, his back against the wall and his lanky legs pulled in against his chest, feeling nothing. He was wearing his drab walking-out uniform and had misplaced his hat. Footsteps echoed on the tile floor, slowing to a stop beside him. He saw a woman’s shoes, and the piercing blue eyes of a little boy staring at him from behind the woman’s legs. It was his neighbor, Frau Vogel. She scolded the boy for staring and continued up the stairs without another word. Merkel barely registered their presence. He was staring straight ahead at the crack in the concrete wall, seeing nothing. He had wrapped his arms around his knees and felt as though he stood on the edge of a black void that threatened to swallow him whole.

Merkel had known his father was dead before he arrived home. His commanding officer had pulled him aside before the rest of the battalion left on a reconnaissance mission and told him that there would be no funeral—that he was being given two days’ leave to bury him without ceremony. It would be simple enough. The state had already cremated the man before Merkel could think of the question: How had his father managed to hang himself in prison?

He knew better than to ask. He had been an antagonistic little punk, full of rebellion and the invincibility of youth, when he reported for his compulsory service. But he had since learned to fall in line, if only for survival. Outspoken rebellion was only so effective. If you made a target of yourself, they would make it their mission to silence you. It was better to be silent to begin with, to engage in a quiet subversion, unnoticed, but still damaging to whatever agenda was being pushed by the people in power. If it were not for the black mark of his family name on his record, Merkel would almost be a model soldier.

There had been no inflection in his voice when he called the police from the telephone booth across the street hours after he found her. Merkel said the word as if it had no meaning.

Selbstmord.

He sat at the kitchen table when they took her away. He had dropped his service cap somewhere on the floor near the body when he walked in the door. An officer with greying hair and hard eyes picked up the hat off the floor and handed it back to him. Merkel clutched it in his hands and answered their questions as if by rote.

Yes, that was his grandfather’s service revolver.

Yes, he had kept it after the war.

Yes, his mother was already dead when he arrived.

Yes, that was her blood on his hands.

No, she did not leave a note.

No, she had not said anything to him.

No, she had not engaged in any criminal activities after her release from prison.

Yes, as far as he was aware.

Yes, it was possible she plotted criminal conspiracies without his knowledge. Maybe with the ladies of her knitting circle.

No, he did not think that this was funny.

Yes, he was aware that his mother was dead.

Yes, he was taking this seriously.

No, his parents never told him the names of any of their criminal contacts.

No, he had not been aware of their criminal activities until they were arrested.

Yes, that is why he never reported them to the authorities.

Yes, he understood that made him look like a conspirator.

No, he did not approve of their criminal behavior.

Yes, he believed they deserved to be held accountable for their crimes.

Yes, he had returned on leave to bury his father.

Yes, his father had died in prison.

Yes, he meant to say his father had hanged himself in prison.

No, he did not think his father was killed by the state.

Yes, he understood how dangerous that belief would be.

Yes, he understood that the officers currently questioning him were looking out for his best interests.

No, he was not angry.

Yes, his commanding officer was aware of what had happened.

Yes, he understood that his leave would not be extended for the second death.

Yes, two days should be sufficient time to arrange both burials.

No, he could not think of a reason why she might have done this.

No, Kommissar, not even one reason.

One of the officers had offered Merkel a cigarette before they left. It took him several attempts to recall how to light a match. After he finished smoking, he had scrubbed his mother’s blood from the grooves in the floor and ripped down the long strips of yellowed wallpaper that were now permanently stained. Later, he would be reprimanded for getting blood on his uniform. He put on a Pink Floyd record and stretched out on the floor, staring at the ceiling as the waning daylight cast rippling shadows through the curtain draped over the open window. He didn’t react when the downstairs neighbors thumped a broom against their ceiling and shouted for him to turn off the music. When the record ended, he listened to the sound of the needle riding the label for hours. He felt as though the connection between his mind and his body had been severed and he might never move again.

It had been years since his mother’s death, but there were still times when Merkel found himself staring down the same black void and feeling that familiar emptiness in the hollow of his chest. He imagined his mother felt it too, after his father’s death. That perhaps it got her in the end. If Irina had not felt that darkness tonight, Merkel knew she would soon enough. As he wound his arms around her, he willed her to be stronger than them both.

German Glossary:

Selbstmord - suicide

Kommissar - officer or inspector

@skrsgardspam @b-afterhours @flowers-in-your-hayr @bebetriste @bethskarsgard @xluvparis @bskarsgardlove92 @scuba-seamus @goblincxnt @dragsraksllib @upirs @stevesharrlngtons @jj-lynn21 @scxrsgxrd @lihikainanea @lostartcambar @dreamtherapy @grandpa-sweaters @hausofobsession @loomiz @walkxthexmoon @ladadada-da @emmyrosee @romangodfreyownsmyass

#atomic blonde fanfiction #bill skarsgard fanfiction #merkel fanfiction #bill skarsgard #gordon merkel #atomic blonde #merkel #gordon merkel fanfiction #voices carry

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adcres · 4 years ago

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howdy hey , pardnerrrs :> i’m rox ( she / her ) ‘n i’ll be playing yr residential sullen broodin’ boy , nico . i didn’t have the time to write out a whole new intro , given that i have back to back classes again today :-’( , so please forgive me for recycling his old intro akawodkgrsd ; . that being said , i did tweak around some tingz and i updated his wcs for him , so if yr down to clown around just hmu on my discord : 𝔰𝔴𝔢𝔢𝔱 𝔦𝔫𝔰𝔬𝔪𝔫𝔦𝔞#2854 ! okie okie , i’ll shut da eff up now ♡

BASICS.

༉‧₊˚✧ kim taehyung , cis man , he / him / his — did you see that nicholas “nico” yoon was trending last night ? the twenty three year old street artist has been getting a lot of press lately . i think it’s due to them being so + quixotic & + free-spirited , but i always thought they seemed - withdrawn & - sybaritic . their fans always say they remind them of soft smoke rings spun in a dreamy haze , silver-ringed fingers rapping against polished oak , and waning light refracting against broken glass though . i wonder if they’ve found out about REDACTED yet … i guess we’ll have to wait and see . [ rox , 22 , pst , she / her , none ]

PINTEREST & PLAYLIST .

01 and 02 .

PERSONALITY .

at first glance , nico reads as this aloof , arrogant type that doesn’t like to associate w the common public . always keeping the majority of people at a comfortable distance , nico moves almost exclusively within his own social network , and doesn’t like to deviate from what he knows best .

not so much pretentious as he is lazy , making an effort to socialize with complete strangers is simply something that nico would never do . hehe ... he’s kind of shy like that .... ♡ though he’d literally never admit it ♡

despite giving the impression that he’s some intimidating and chronically indifferent kind of guy , nico is genuinely a sweet boy — ‏‏‎ one who’s in a constant state of confusion as to why people seem to be so scared of him . it always comes as a shock when close friends of his admit that they thought he absolutely hated their guts when they first met him .

b/c tho he’s p smart , nico is very oblivious at times , and he’s 100% the kind of guy who’ll walk away from a conversation thinking he did a rly rly good job trying to make a friend ... when in reality he prob said four words in the span of thirty minutes smh .

overall , nico’s a private person , especially with what he’s thinking ... and it’s really hard to get a clear read on what’s on his mind . sharing his feelings has never been one of nico’s interests b/c he just genuinely doesn’t think whatever he has to say is rly worth mentioning . so he usually just shuts da fuck up n lets other ppl talk so he can mentally gain the strength to continue socializing .

push nico’s buttons enough tho ‘n you’ll catch this mf speaking in full sentences .

lastly , it should b noted that nico is a romantic through n through ... this mf probably d*ed in the victorian era ‘n got reincarnated b/c he’s got that ‘ lets share furtive glances across the room but never say a thing to each other ‘ thing on lock . mr. darcy headass

and while nico might play the role of long-suffering , ever pining lover to a T , he’s more in love w / the idea of love than he is w / any single person . and he literally cannot hold down a relationship w/o fucking it up for himself in some shape or form .

kind of sarcastic ... v much the teasing type ....

can b very impulsive at times , loves to go on solo adventures at night , prefers his own company tbh ...

overview : melancholic , reticent , noncommittal , humble , mild-mannered , romantic .

a mix of : josh from clueless and j.d. from heathers

more here .

MORE AESTHETICS.

the chill of silver jewelry against flushed skin , forgotten graffiti on porcelain sinks , flickering motel lights , kisses sticky with vodka , eyes ringed with lavender , sleepless nights surrendered to the dull buzz of television , obscure art house films , sun-kissed cheeks , the surprise of summer rain , chest aching with lost loves , scattered baby’s breath and rosemary , and a shared smile between perfect strangers .

CHARACTER DISSERTATION.

nico was born on a brisk wintry morning in the fashion district of los angeles ( january 21st , 1997 ) to a family of six .

as the second youngest child , and the only male son to boot , nico grew up with his only inheritance being a generational kind of hunger , one that demanded for more than what his struggling parents could offer

the arts stole nico at an early age ... ushering him into a world of creation and freedom beyond the four bleak walls he daily occupied . from spending lonely summers tucked away in some forgotten corner in the library to practicing on a borrowed violin from dawn to dusk , nico knew that even with nothing at his disposal , there was always something to be made w/ the tools he’d been given

despite not having the money for private tutors to hone their son’s growing artistic talents , his parents did whatever they could to support his dreams , whether that meant working double shifts back to back or scrounging for loose change underneath the sofa cushions to pay for whatever materials nico needed .

it was in this strange way that nico grew up p spoiled . somehow having nothing while also having absolutely everything at the same time .

very much a family man , the first big purchase nico made once he broke out in hollywood was a house in beverly hills for his parents . now that he’s finally at a place where he can take care of his family , nico makes sure that his parents and sisters want for nothing

while he showers everyone else with generous gifts and obscene amounts of money , nico doesn’t particularly feel comfortable doing the same for himself . he’s a simple man through n through . one who’s content to spend his time walking his dog late at night , listening to a podcast on his airpods , instead of going out to a club w/ other well-known socialites .

a true artist at heart , nico refuses to conform to the current trends of hollywood , instead insisting on wearing thrifted clothes to important galas — ‏‏‎much to the frustration of his PR team and the chagrin of his stylists . but none of the choices nico makes seems to surprise anyone anymore . driving flashy cars and wearing designer clothes has never really been his style , after all . and it’s important to him that he remain authentically himself despite everything .

WANTED CONNECTS.

pr relationship ( open ) : someone that nico is contractually obligated to date ... i could totally see there being drama ‘n tension from having to pretend to actually like each other ... would b better if they rly did not like each other at all ...

fwb ( open ) : buddies who bump uglies sometimes ... they both agreed they’d never catch feelings for each other but we’ll see ...

frenemies ( open ) : someone that grinds nico’s gears but they’re a friend of his friend ... so they’re forced to keep it civil . i can see them exchanging hateful comments in the back of their friend’s car while simultaneously posting pics of each other on ig to keep up the rouse .

unrequited crush ( open ) : likely nico would not realize if yr muse had a crush on them ... but it’d be fun to play it out like a kdrama anyway heh heh

a close friend group ( open / any ) : i thought it’d b so cute if there was like a small group of friends , maybe 3-4 ppl , that do stupid shit like ditch going to celebrity after-parties to break into abandoned buildings , get real high , ask stupid ‘ would u rather ‘ questions , and do sum main character type shit ... yk what im puttin down ... ‘n nico is def the type to open up in the presence of extroverts so i think having a group of wild outsiders of diff bgs would b v inch resting ..

enemies / rivals ( open / any ) : tbh nico prob rubs ppl the wrong way since he has resting bitch face ‘n never wants to talk to anyone .. so im sure there r ppl who just do not like this mf ... and rest assured that the feeling is mutual ...

bad / good influence ( open / any ) : nico’s known to mount his high horse often ... mr morality over here ... so i just know he prob would butt heads w/ the residential troublemaker . tho nico’s artwork can be controversial and out of the box at times , his art style and his personality are at constant odds , and it’d b interesting to have that bad influence / good influence dynamic w/ someone .

family friend ( open ) : someone who grew up w/ nico in dtla ... couldve gone to the same public school as him ... or their families couldve gone to the same church ...

ok my intro post has become a fucking behemoth so im going to stop here ‘n just say i have so many more wcs in mind so if u wanna plot lets just talk hehe :>

#lavish.intro #okie gotta blast i have class in 5 min

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judehayward · 4 years ago

Text

lady gaga voice slowly fadin in: ju-Das juda-ah-ah… this depressed goblin bastard is honestly my fav male muse like i dnt typically stick w male muses tht long i struggle bt................. i’ve played him the longest of them all n always seem to return to him. jst cnt stay away. way 2 attached to this absurd little man. it’s nai btw!!!! (josefine on the main). launches right in to jude’s intro without further adieu..... (u can also find his playlist here) 🧙‍🎨

「douglas booth & cis-male」⇾ hayward , jude, the senior radcliffe student’s records show that he is a pisces and 23 years old. he is studying ART, living in moris and can be protective, laidback, nonsensical & apathetic. when i see him i am reminded of wearing a faded smiley face sticker on your forehead while receiving a serious lecture, saying “fuck off” to inanimate objects, lead marbles instead of eyes. ⇽「nai & 23 & gmt & she/her.」

he pinterest:

me in the voice of a card magician performing on the street: round up round up pick a pinterest any pinterest!

ta-da it’s aesthetics:

lead marbles instead of eyes, a stolen hearse careening down the wrong lane, wearing a faded smiley face sticker on your forehead while receiving a serious lecture, bags under the eyes that are so big they could pack enough clothes for a three week vacation, a cigarette wobbling from your bottom lip as you squint against the sunlight, passing out on a stranger’s rooftop, placing sunglasses over the eyes of a biology lab skeleton, gangling around the place like shaggy minus his scooby snacks, saying “fuck off” to inanimate objects

about tha Bitch:

born in sheffield in england, bt they went back and forth between there n san fran a lot

jude was an unhappy accident. his parents never rly used protection bc they were super Liberal n Au Naturel n believed in the pull out method bc… they were maniacs. bt then the ONE time they used a condom in an effort to b safety conscious it broke n hence…. jude was born

they just kind of ran w it bc they had such a passionate relationship tht they were like What The Hell…. may as well! itll be fine we’ll learn to be good parents n love him like normal ppl do

spoiler alert: tht didn’t work out

they were ok to him like they weren’t fully Bad bt they just found him to be a massive burden n hindrance to their plans. pretty absent n irresponsible. they literally….. had sex all day every day n acted like a pair of teenagers. it ws a super weird environment for a kid to grow up in bc he literally had no role models or… guidance or…. anything rly. occasionally they’d joke around w him or pretend they properly knew what grade he was going into but for the most part they just Didn’t Care the way parents shd. they lost his birth certificate n dnt remember what they put as his middle name so he’s jst kind of like hmmmm............. n gives himself a diff one every time ppl ask. past variations hv included: jude pauly hayward, jude maureen hayward, jude van winkle hayward. says all of these w a very straight face

despite this he does hv some nice memories w them. usually he definitely sees them fr holidays. frm being rly young their christmas tradition hs been to get a bunch of chinese food like a Banquet Feast n spend all day smoking n drinking into the early hours. perhaps not the healthiest or most responsible bt 😔 jude rly likes it it’s kind of the one time of yr he feels he has a proper family

they r both suuuuper into the arts. rly good sculptors bt they paint too n they actually own a successful gallery in sheffield n san fran

(trauma tw) as a result he grew up around a lot of creative n sometimes pretentious ppl. the friends of his parents were more present in his life than his ACTUAL parents bc they were always jetting off to diff countries to scout out new pieces fr their galleries n just have a gd time in beautiful places without…. the annoyance tht ws being responsible n looking after someone. tbh some of his parents friends were rly damaging too bt….i won’t go into that just yet. it doesn’t rly…need properly explaining bc jude never talks abt it anyway n it….is rather triggering so i’ll jst….leav it for now tbh. basically they just were Not Nice n jude had a lot of bad memories he keeps repressed bt he also??? has some gd ones..... it was a strange environment bt he’s a survivor

(death n grief tw) he hd to do community service bc he kind of… hd a bit of a breakdown before the funeral of his elderly neighbour who bsically raised him bc her kids rly didnt care abt her they jst wanted her inheritance?? so he… stole the hearse w her casket still in it n ws jst like… drivin around the place sort of… tryin nt to cry…..KJJFHSFKJGHKFG i mean. it isnt funny its actually sad bt :/ in a very bizarre n jude way. he gt caught n taken in fr questioning bt her son kind of realised hw… broken up abt her death jude ws n had a heart n didnt press charges. regardless he stil hd to do community service bc it ws like taken seriously even tho it ws his first proper offence. doin it rly exhausted n depressed him so when he wsnt doin tht he ws just hibernatin in his room……. this ws like 4 months ago nw............ just some fun lore fr u all

bc of how he ws raised he has a p cultured taste. he luvs classic lit n p much anything artsy. he can play piano 2 n sometimes gets rly high n thinks he’s mozart level gd at composing he’s jst going fking wild on the keys in a trance...... i mean he’s gd bt… chill

he’s rly sarcastic n so deadpan like he’ll say smthn completely ridiculous bt he’ll say it w his whole chest so sincere.... it’s rly hard to tell when he’s joking or serious honestly. has an overflowing secret sketchbook n if he cares abt someone he’ll probably secretly draw them. does NOT share these drawings w the person he hates being openly sentimental. at heart he is jst a very Sad Boy w lots of repressed issues like depression genuinely just does NAT giv him a single break bt he plasters over this w wise cracks n never discusses his emotions ever. he’s actually p decent or at least tries to b. he’s kind of like tht bit in superbad where michael cera gets rly drunk n makes a toast to women like tht energy...........

he has rly bad insomnia so he like never sleeps idk how he’s Alive straight up. please go to bed sir............. he always has rly sleepy eyes n rubs them tiredly mid conversation. he smokes a lot of weed to try n compensate fr this n make him tired bt he still struggles a lot

ANYWAY that aside he’s at radcliffe doing art, focusing on fine art like painting is............... the thing he luvs most...... his style is kind of.......... taking normal things n painting w surreal colours.... he likes A LOT of colour in his paintings which is kind of a stark contrast to his personality bc his world’s so.... washed out n grey............ lovs art n philosophy n literature n photography n music....

ummMMMMmm honestly idk i’m blankin on what else to say. ull find him smoking weed reading an american classic or gnawing at his thumbnail n getting charcoal smudges on all his clothes. wandering the streets in plaid pj bottoms n dr martens eating frm a cereal box without care in the world. he’s p broody n scruffy n he’s mostly here fr a laidback time....... doesn’t rly like when ppl take themselves too seriously........ likes strange ppl thinks the world is mde richer by them n likes when ppl can jst bounce back jokes at him without being like erm. u dont make sense mate. bc frankly he can come up w some strange stuff sometimes.............. talking to him cn b like navigating a dark n bendy road without a flashlight.......

(drugs tw) once did shrooms n woke up naked in the woods curled up in a pile of leaves. to this day he recounts this as his werewolf transformation. hs no idea hw he ended up there n when ppl r like are u not. concerned jude. tht is so strange? he jst shrugs like.............. dunno....................... suppose i’m jst a werewolf upon occasion. so casual abt it. jst truly does Not care abt most things at all..... almost to the point tht it’s concerning (sometimes way past the point tht it’s concerning too :/)

this is the desc on an aesthetic i mde of his style once n sums it up well!! ‘additionally: too many pairs of trousers, a hideous amount of white t-shirts all somewhat stained with charcoal, a jumper so thinly knit it almost looks sheer, chipped teale nail varnish, a cream corduroy jacket with a cigarette hole singed onto the cuff, vintage wiry reading glasses he almost never wears, a freshly rolled cigarette behind his ear, a thrifted t-shirt with a warped bart simpson wearing a stethoscope with the caption ‘bard knwos cardiology’ and two crops hacked that way with kitchen scissors that he sometimes wears to paint.‘

EXPERT at rolling spliffs like jst. mkes them so precise n neat....... it’s his super power. his fav thing to smoke frm is banana flavour papers.................... linking 2 this he’s like. bad w emotions bt he does try..... once his friend (maggie) ws sad so he brought her a spliff wrapped in grape flavoured paper bc it’s her fav fruit n jst like. wordlessly gave it to her. it’s the thought tht counts.....

PLOTS!!!!!

plays bass in a band which cld b a fun connection to get together??? i picture the music being like surf rock type like........... mac demarco...... bt he also luvs elliott smith n glass animals n the cure n metronomy n neutral milk hotel n talking heads n radiohead n mazzy star n wolf alice...................... idk jst like.... within tht ballpark i suppose i imagine it being................

mayb ppl he shares classes w?????? i’d like someone tht does a similar course n they hang out tgether when it comes to trips fr the module to museums or exhibits or wtever................ they both stand in front of paintings analysing it rly wrong n saying stuff like hmmmmmmmmm....... i do declare i see a, uh..... large phallus protruding from the centre of this image...... moves something in me.......... n some elderly person looking at it besides them is like Ergh. sickened n disgraced. leaves w a brow severely furrowed

someone he smokes w on the moris rooftop late at night when he cnt sleep??? mayb they’re up n cnt sleep either fr whtever reason n it’s become an unspoken kind of ritual where they always clamber out n find each other there n jst wordlessly keep them company

jude is kind of like. protective almost to a fault sometimes........... mayb some guy he’s punched......................... if they hurt someone he cares abt........... typically it wld hv been a girl he ws kind of like. affected by his first relationship bc she had a bad home situation n ever since jst wnts..... to Protect it’s kind of like an automatic instinct ingrained in him nw 😔 all sounds very noble n well bt sometimes it cn b a bit of an escalation i wnt lie

perhaps a few hook-ups??? jude doesn’t tend to sleep w ppl he rly knows bc he just..... likes it to b an impersonal thing doesn’t like getting attached fr various reasons so mayb they only kno each other via this OR mayb he bent his rules a bit..... cld either work seamlessly or hv added drama if one side hs mre feelings or whtever

currently living in moris w 2 roommates bt i’d love some neighbours perhaps..... mayb someone tht lives directly nxt door to his room n is like ://// bc he plays music loud n weeds always drifting frm his window n mking their room smell if theirs is open too................. or mayb they get on..... mayb there’s a rly mean seagull tht lands on a branch n poos on pedestrians n they both commentate on it frm their windows like david attenborough...... they’re like he’s at it again. they’ve named him n everything

HONESTLY anything if u have an idea hmu i’d love 2 hear it.......... rubs my hands tgether in excitement to plot up a storm w u all

#ruhqintro #depression tw #death tw #grief tw #neglect tw #trauma tw #drugs tw

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iicewitch · 4 years ago

Text

☕ real boy

a playlist for @stevenrcgers link to playlist: here tracklist and favorite lyrics below

1. blood, sweat and tears - bts Peaches and cream, sweeter than sweet Chocolate cheeks and chocolate wings But your wings are wings of the devil In front of your sweet is bitter bitter 2. brainchild - everything everything A good thing Now you think about it, don't you make it real? The bad thing, maybe it's a feeling I don't want to feel But love is all you need to know But love is all you need to know

3. dumb dumb - red velvet

Like a mannequin Everything is so awkward I should just act like I do normally But whenever I see you, I act so stupid Like my little brother’s robot Everything is so awkward What do I do? I think I’m broken I forgot even how to breathe 4. the zombie song - stephanie mabey And I'd try not to bite and infect you because I'd respect you too much And that's why I'd wait until we got married Oh, and our happiest days would be spent Picking off all your friends and they'd see A love this deep won't stay buried

5. real boy - lola blanc Every time we touch your hands are colder, colder There's no beating coming from your wooden chest Frozen grin, a mannequin When I get closer I can see the strings there underneath your vest 6. who do you want to be ? - oingo boingo Who do you want to be today? Who do you want to be? I think I'll be a teddy boy, I think I'll be a hunk I think I'll be a tough guy and I think I'll be a punk I might just be a fashion star all dressed in frilly rags Or perhaps, I'll cross the other side and walk around in drag! 7. under my skin - jukebox the ghost I can fit two people under my skin Yeah, I can fit two people under my skin And I will prove it if you will listen You crawled up in there, you joined me within I can feel your heart beating under my skin And the beating of your heart is making me bleed from within 8. mr. capgras encounters a secondhand vanity: tulpamancer's prosopagnosia - will wood and the tapeworms Damn, I thought you’re not your imposter. You’re so sure you’re not gonna get caught! Dead in your own skin, but you didn’t choose what you were born in! And another man in your repertoire, ready in your head and fed upon your memoirs Still the same rules apply from the birthday to the mourning What you feel and what you do; are those things really you? And if not, then what is? 9. breaking out - the protomen If you can hear my voice outside these walls (If you can hear me) If you can hear me sending out this message tonight Then break the silence, send a signal back (If you can hear me) I'm coming, all I need is a little guiding light...

10. roaring 20s - panic at the disco Maybe I'm overjoyed, maybe I'm paranoid Designer me up in straight jackets My tell-tale heart's a hammer in my chest Cut me a silk-tied tourniquet This is my roaring, roaring 20's 11. evelyn evelyn - evelyn evelyn We grew up closer than most Closer than anything, closer than anything Shared our bed and wore the same clothes Talked about everything, spoke about so many things 12. looking glass - the birthday massacre A boyish notion of false emotion These words are spoken despite my love A fool's devotion was set in motion My eyes are open now

13. play dead - the birthday massacre Thinking hurts and thoughts don't rhyme To those of us who've never tried To find a face behind our lipstick smiles And as our pretty faces die Our broken hearts will wonder why The makeup just won't hide the scars of time 14. lets fall in love - mother mother There's a game in the world A little bit of cat and mouse With the boys and the girls And if I had to ante up I'd bet on the birds 'Cause they don't have to walk around With the boys and the girls 15. o my heart - mother mother And I pour my heart a new foundation But it don't set hard it just stays shaking And I scratch my name I scratch my name in But it don't set hard it gets mixed back in Oh my heart, it's a fish out of water 16. body - mother mother Take my teeth, tear through my cheeks And take the nose go and dispose Oh would you go dispose, just go dispose 'Cause I've grown tired of this body A cumbersome and heavy body

17. touch up - mother mother I am a makeover queen A swan out of duckling Ugly duckling you're drowning In makeup (in makeup) My makeup (my makeup) Has washed off 18. roman holiday - nicki minaj Take your medication, Roman Take a short vacation, Roman, you'll be okay You need to know your station, Roman Some alterations on your clothes and your brain

19. replicant - they might be giants You've got his eyes Same exact smile All that he has All this will be yours 20. happy days - GHOST Oh, it’s painful My heart is quite a mouthful I’ll tear it out for you I’ll be the sacrifice for you Y’know, things could go exactly how you want it I’d be exactly how you want me Use what’s left of my soiled personality I’m all yours, I’ll do anything 21. girls on film - duran duran 'Cause the crowd all love pulling dolly by the hair By the hair And she wonders how she ever got here As she goes under again Girls on film (two minutes later) Girls on film Girls on film (got your picture) Girls on film 22. nobody - mitski And I know no one will save me I'm just asking for a kiss Give me one good movie kiss And I'll be alright Nobody, nobody, nobody

23. TT - twice I feel like crying, I don’t feel like myself This isn’t like me at all I love you so much Think I’m all grown up now I’m free to make my own choices, but why Why can’t I have it my way The more I try to push you away The more I’m drawn and attracted to you baby 24. in every dream home a heartache - roxy music Your skin is like vinyl The perfect companion You float my new pool De luxe and delightful Inflatable doll My role is to serve you Disposable darling Can't throw you away now 25. the moss - cosmo sheldrake But have you heard the story of the rabbit in the moon? Or the cow that hopped the planets while straddling a spoon Or she, who leapt up mountains, while whistling up a tune And swapped her songs with swallows while riding on a broom 26. green - todrick hall Green! Is a way of life And the millions would kill to see their name up in the lights For the green is okay tonight But be careful what you wish Because you might get what you like 27. guy.exe - superfruit Oh I, wish I could synthesize a picture perfect guy Oh I, oh I Six feet tall and super strong, we'd always get along Alright, alright Oh, he'd pick me up at eight and not a minute late Cause I don't like to wait, no Kind and ain't afraid to cry or treat his momma right 28. the dismemberment song - blue da kid Well once upon a time that's where the clock begins And right after the end Well, that's right where the plot thins And I've got no angel to keep me in line! So I'm taking your narrative and I'm making it mine! 29. me!me!me! - teddyloid I’ve worked hard for myself - What have you done for yourself? When you notice the scattered pieces of the mirror You’ll realize I wanted you to notice Is this still going on? Is this still happening? Even though I’d been waiting for you Even though I loved you 30. alone together - fall out boy My heart is like a stallion, they love it more when it's broken Do you wanna feel beautiful, do you wanna, yeah I'm outside the door, invite me in So we can go back and play pretend 31. get busy living or get busy dying - fall out boy This has been said so many times that I'm not sure if it matters But we never stood a chance And I'm not sure if it matters If you are the shores, I am the waves begging for big moons I'm mailing letters to addresses in a ghost town 32. hi it’s me - ashnikko When I'm with you I have amnesia, I'm weaker than before My stupid brain thinks that I need you, I'm eager to hurt more My best friend thinks that I'm a dumbass My dumbass should be a little more cautious I slip up, I text you, I forget That you were so so disrespectful 33. i’m poppy - poppy Welcome to the new world, I'm your internet girl Open up and you'll see, everyone is happy I like your technology, can you put it on me? The future is so pretty, we're living in harmony 34. idola no circus - neru Come, let’s dance all night in our naked bodies We know, we know your true nature Again putting on a fake face, You’re just like a pierrot ! It’s time to put a mask, a mask On your unsociable faced 35. shine - casey lee williams But baby, it's time to make up your mind I think that tonight is when our stars align Honey, it's time to leave the doubt behind Take my hand 'cause you and I are gonna shine 36. one thing - casey lee williams I was nowhere, I had no one, I felt nothing Lost without a voice and on my own Then a candle's flame brought a brand new name But now you've stolen everything And I'm all alone 37. sweetest cure - hugo What the hell am I s'posed to be Choose a world over me Sitting pretty in my mess On the phone I can't confess Word's out somehow You're the sweetest cure I never got to tell you 38. bang bang bang bang - sohodolls Teacher says that I've been naughty I must learn to concentrate But the girls they pull my hair And with the boys I can't relate Daddy says I'm good for nothing Mama says that it's from him Manic sister thinks I'm cracking Brother says it's in my genes 39. helpless - phillipa soo One week later I'm writin' a letter nightly Now my life gets better Every letter that you write me I'm helpless! He's mine, that boy is mine! Look into your eyes And the sky's the limit, I'm Helpless! Helpless! Down for the count, and I'm drownin' in 'em 40. lifeboat - laurence o’ keefe Everyone's pushing Everyone's fighting Storms are approaching There's nowhere to hide If I say the wrong thing Or I wear the wrong outfit They'll throw me right over the side 41. chase the morning - sarah brightman In you is a world of promise We have both been kept in bondage But you can learn from all my failures Let your life be your dream Integrity, honesty, its too late for me Don't look back till your free to chase the morning 42. no reason - leslie kritzer Everything, everything happens for a reason Be a beacon of light in the world Put a little "alright" in the world There are spiritual guides above Look up and see 'em Perception is reality Just listen to the melody the universe sings 'Cause everything, everything happens for a reason 43. i love play rehearsal - stephanie hsu I love play rehearsal 'Cause you are equiped with directions and text Life is easy in rehearsal You follow a script so you know what comes next Anywho, the point that I'm getting to Is sometimes life can't work out in the way It works out in the play 44. your song - elton john And you can tell everybody this is your song It may be quite simple but now that it's done I hope you don't mind I hope you don't mind That I put down in words How wonderful life is while you're in the world 45. the party goes with you - lindsay mendez And when we're dancing nose to nose Darling do you suppose, darling do you suppose This party could be just us two, and I your wife? Oh, oh, the gayest party, sad but true It's true The party goes with you The party goes with you 46. half jack - dresden dolls It's half biology and half corrective surgery gone wrong You'll notice something funny if you hang around here for too Long ago in some black hole before they had these pills to take it back I'm half Jill and half Jack 47. the secret - pierces Got a secret Can you keep it? Swear, this one you'll save Better lock it in your pocket Takin' this one to the grave If I show you, then I know you Won't tell what I said 'Cause two can keep a secret If one of them is dead 48. connect - claris My heart awakes in order to depict the future Even if I come to a halt on a tough road The beautiful blue sky always waits for me Therefore I'm not afraid I won't be disheartened anymore no matter what happens 49. simple and clean - hikaru utada Hold me, whatever lies beyond this morning Is a little later on Regardless of warnings, the future doesn't scare me at all Nothing's like before 50. mountains - message to bears And we could run away Before the light of day You know we always could The mountains say, the mountains say And we could run away Before the light of day You know we always could The mountains say, the mountains say

#gene's playlists

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airadam · 4 years ago

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Episode 136 : Protection

"I'm a walking heart attack, looking for somebody to happen..."

- Boogieman

Still shut up in the house for the most part, which at least gives me a chance to really dig through my crates, vinyl and otherwise! This month's selection has some great recent records, some older underground favourites, and a mix segment I've been wanting to do for ages - figured this episode was as good a time as any!

Twitter : @airadam13

Twitch : @airadam13

Playlist/Notes

Mac Ayres : Shadows

If nothing else, this enforced time spent in the house has yielded some great musical discoveries. I heard this cut on a DJ Jazzy Jeff Twitch session, and bought it immediately as soon as I found out what it was! Mac Ayers is a singer/songwriter/instrumentalist from Long Island, and if he's already turning out material like this in his early 20s, I can only imagine what it'll be with more experience. This is a highlight on last year's "Juicebox" album, and one that those who enjoy the modern soul sound will almost certainly enjoy!

[DJ Premier] Prhyme : My Calling (Instrumental)

This beat from "Prhyme 2" is so, so good. DJ Premier continues to turn out fresh creations over thirty years since his debut, with more different styles than he's often given credit for. The pianos sound like falling rain, the low end is the solid ground, and everything else fits perfectly around them.

Ski Beatz & Stalley : Gentlemen's Quarterly

Smooth from the lyrics to Ski Beatz' sophisticated production, this is a cut I'd managed to forget about until I rediscovered it in my collection recently. Find it on the "Ski Beatz 24 Hour Karate School Presents Twilight" (snappy!) LP, if you can find a reasonably-priced copy!

LL Cool J ft. Keith Murray, Prodigy, Fat Joe, and Foxy Brown : I Shot Ya (Remix)

A classic from the mid-90s. LL brought in some of the hottest MCs of the time alongside a young Foxy Brown making her on-record debut for a Trackmasters-produced street banger. The "Mr. Smith" album is the source for this often-sampled gem.

O.C. & Organized Konfusion : You Won't Go Far

Unapologetic boom-bap from this all-NYC combination, taken from the second volume of the "New Jersey Drive" soundtrack. Of all the tracks on that release, it's the one that hews closest to the plot of the film itself, which itself makes it a standout in the world of 90s Hip-Hop/R&B soundtracks! OK self-produced this one, and rather than give each MC a verse each, they split each verse between the three of them for more of a tag-team feel.

Rise : Make Sure That We Win

Note: I got this wrong on the voiceover - this is a Beatminerz beat, not DJ Spinna. Spinna produced the excellent "Part of the Game" on the same EP.

Rise is an MC out of Brooklyn and the Demigodz crew, who has a knack for punchlines and quotables within a laid back style - he just seems puzzled by wack MCs most of the time! The Beatminerz provide the beat with the fuzzbox guitars moving all over the soundscape and the classic boom-bap drum style and some sub bass to give it the heft. DJ Evil Dee of Da Beatminerz rounds things out with his cuts for the hook. Grab this and a couple of other great tracks on the 2003 "The Intro..." EP.

Pete Rock : Air Smoove

"Petestrumentals 2" may not become the low-key icon that the first instalment did, but don't sleep on it - it's still Pete Rock on the beats, after all. I keep going back to it and finding myself enjoying tracks more and more, with this being a prime example.

Above The Law ft. 2Pac and Money B : Call It What U Want

I once nearly got into a fight (the other guy was heated) when I off-handedly mentioned that I remembered when 2Pac had been a dancer for Digital Underground - but it was true, and there was never any shame in it! Anyway, it was also with that crew that he made initial strides onto the mic, and after going solo himself, this was one of his first features, alongside Money B from DU. Above The Law's "Black Mafia Life", from which this is taken, is one of the most overlooked albums that could claim the accolade of "classic" when you listen to how it sounded and how early it was made - I strongly recommend that every listener seeks it out for an end-to-end hearing. It's striking to realise that of the four MCs on this cut, only two are still with us today - RIP 2Pac and KMG.

DJ Quik ft. Pharoahe Monch & K.K. : Murda 1 Case

An absolute stomper from Compton's finest, leading with the piano, keeping the drums hard but simple (kicks on 1 and 3 only, snares on 2 and 4), and three MCs going at it. On this clear standout on 2002's "Under Tha Influence", the underrated Quik holds his own against one of the best to pick up a mic, and shows the confidence and intelligence as a producer to know that this was the man to bring in for the closing verse.

De La Soul : Verbal Clap

Many years after their debut, De La remind you that they can get busy on a state-of-the-art thumping beat with no problem - in this case, a masterful creation by J Dilla, one of two on 2004's "The Grind Date". Dave's rhyme style here is extra raw and he dominates by sheer brute force, standing out even on an album where De La sound highly-motivated overall. If you don't yet know it, it's well worth your while to search it out and have a proper listen.

Mr. Scruff ft. Broke 'n' English : Listen Up

Manchester all the way on this track, with the DJ and producer Mr Scruff getting the drumline mad active with a nice bassline, and Strategy and DRS of Broke 'n' English bringing all the local flavour on the mic. This great cut is on the flip of the also-excellent "Nice Up The Function" 12", which is now available digitally - so no difficulty in finding a copy!

[The Neptunes] Busta Rhymes : Pass The Courvoisier, Part II (Instrumental)

A great party beat, one to get people moving even without Busta and Pharrell's vocals!

AZ : Take Care Of Me

From his very first LP, AZ was flowing over soul/R&B samples, so it wasn't a reach for him to make a track like this for "Aziatic", his fourth. Precision soundtracks it with a "no samples" approach which for the non-Bad Boy producers tended to be the move for the club/radio tracks, and it's aged fairly well. AZ's lyrics are definitely reflective of the time - cellphones are so unremarkable in 2020!

Krumb Snatcha ft. Boogieman : Oxygen

Krumb Snatcha is pretty much as rugged as it gets, but here he shows that while he can give you an underground street classic like "Closer To God", there's still time to have fun! This track from his second LP "Respect All, Fear None" isn't what you might expect from KS but I think he did a solid job here. Nottz' beat bumps and burbles with a solid low end, and the guest MC Boogieman, who's already collaborated with him previously, steals the show with a casually disrespectful closing verse - not a particularly technical one, but entertaining!

Mic Geronimo : Nothin' Move But The Money

This record was hated when it came out, of all the tracks in this section, it was the most blatant pander to the pop audience - after all, Puffy (now Diddy) was the producer! This was amplified by the fact that Queens' own Mic Geronimo was a darling of the underground scene after his excellent debut LP "The Natural", and this is a million miles away stylistically. "Vendetta" was a big change, and arguably a bit of a career killer because of it. Have a look at the video - every so often, Mic actually looks pretty uncomfortable!

Goodie Mob ft. Big Boi and Backbone : Get Rich To This

This was the next most derided track when it was released - if someone else had recorded it, it may have been received for what it was, but again, this was a serious sonic whiplash for anyone who had heard "Soul Food" or "Still Standing". It was still Organized Noize on production, still the same MCs (plus guests), but definitely not what people were expecting, by and large. I can't front though - I kind of liked it even then! The "World Party" LP is the source for this one.

[Kenny Dope] L Swift : Ride This (Instrumental)

Crispy clean drums and a nice guitar line are the highlights of this beat from a 2000 12" by one of the MCs from the incredible Natural Elements (now reformed, with L Swift as Swigga). The vocal version features A Butta from NE and the B-side is produced by Spinna, so well worth picking up if you see it!

Toots & The Maytals : Funky Kingston

We close the episode with the title track of the 1973 album by the reggae legend "Toots" Hibbert, who passed away this month at the age of 77, and his band. The throatiness of his delivery on this classic cut does bring to mind the American funk godfather James Brown, but the message and the groove is pure yard. It may be almost fifty years old now, but still moves a dancefloor with ease!

Please remember to support the artists you like! The purpose of putting the podcast out and providing the full tracklist is to try and give some light, so do use the songs on each episode as a starting point to search out more material. If you have Spotify in your country it's a great way to explore, but otherwise there's always Youtube and the like. Seeing your favourite artists live is the best way to put money in their pockets, and buy the vinyl/CDs/downloads of the stuff you like the most!

Check out this episode!

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finalwuyifantasy · 4 years ago

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how to fall in love with a kpop idol in 6 years and 1 week: an autobiography

i don’t expect anyone to read this, but i want to have it written somewhere...

i first found out about Cross Gene in 2014. according to my youtube history, considering i have no memories at all of 6 years ago, the first video i ever watched of them was Amazing Bad Lady’s MV teaser (on the day it came out, surprisingly), then the MV for it, then that goddamn dance practice. (fun fact: i kept coming back to that dance practice every week. just like i do today. i haven’t changed!) few months later they released Play With Me and Not a boy not yet a man, and i think either Billion Dolla or ZEDD was also released around that time. i watched La-Di Da-Di’s and Shooting Star’s MVs but didn’t feel too much about La-Di Da-Di, really liked Shooting Star though. that was the only 4 songs i would have of them at the time: Amazing Bad Lady, Play With Me, Not a boy not yet a man and Shooting Star. according to my twitter history, i tried learning their names with mediocre success. eventually i learned... Takuya. Takuya was kinda the only one i was obsessed with at the time. lasted a few months or so.

eventually, some time after that, i just fell out of kpop as a whole. i’d still listen to kpop songs, because you never grow out of music -- but i’ve gotten a lot less interested in fandoms, performances, variety shows, new releases, new groups, everything. i didn’t really consider myself a “kpopper” anymore, because all i had was just... yeah, i listen to kpop, but that’s literally it. i think this blog kinda reflects that. i just fell out of it completely. and i kinda forgot about Cross Gene.

two years ago, Cross Gene released Touch It and Fly. i only found out about those because Billion Dolla randomly got stuck in my head so i looked that one up and found out they had new songs. and i loved both, especially Fly. it was strange to see them without Casper but i embraced it. two years ago was also the time i started being a regular on that one guy’s stream, and he had song requests available at the time; i remember that i played Fly there twice. the first time he let it play fully, probably because he wasn’t paying attention, because the second time he skipped it after people were yelling in his chat that it was “ew kpop”. ㅎㅎ

but even after that, i also, stopped paying attention. i had Fly in my playlist for quite a while, but one day my playlist changed, and i just forgot about them again. i liked the songs they released, but i didn’t want to care more than that. i fell out of kpop, after all.

and then comes... last month. on June 1st, 2020, once again, i got Billion Dolla stuck in my head and went to listen to it (it’s always fucking Billion Dolla! why’s that song so good!). then i decided to watch ZEDD, because, i hadn’t before, and i wanted to know the plot or whatever. (it was an okay movie, but eh could have been better, anyway) little did i know this would be me jumping into the rabbit hole...

i found out they had had a comeback “recently” that i missed (Black or White, which actually came out before Touch It/Fly, but i had no idea). i read in the comments Takuya left the group last year. i was devastated. started looking up Takuya content to cheer myself up. came across one MV, then another, watched them all in a row. i remembered Amazing Bad Lady and thought to myself, how could i forget. i ended up watching probably every Amazing Bad Lady performance they have and being outraged that they banned the choreo. i found out it was the first (and possibly still only?) boy group choreo that got banned from music shows. and even with that achievement Cross Gene is unknown to the mainstream media... it felt sad. anyway, i needed more Takuya content. i started watching Abnormal Summit - only 6 years late, no big deal. i watched like 10 episodes before getting bored (poor Takuya barely got any screentime and i didn’t really care about the guests).

over a month and a half my life was all Cross Gene. i’m not sure how it happened. i watched so many live performances, probably because that’s all there is to watch. fucking hell there’s literally barely any Cross Gene content on youtube and that drives me WILD but anyway. i watched some variety shows. whatever i could find that was subbed in english really lol. i ended up listening to every single one of their songs. i’ve had their entire discography - bar for one song that i just haven’t found at all lol - playing on loop for weeks now. my playlist is only Cross Gene. i’ve fallen for them so much harder than when i found out about them 6 years ago, and i surprised myself by liking every single one of their songs. the only time i’ve had that was with Big Bang, where i liked every single song by them - at least until MADE. even EXO, and you know how deep i was into them, had several songs i would occasionally skip or just not like listening to. but not Cross Gene. every Cross Gene song is a masterpiece. and i love every single one of them.

and then... something strange happened. for the past 6 years my Cross Gene life was only Takuya, and yet... over less than 10 days... my Cross Gene life became only Seyoung.

i don’t even know if i remembered his name when i came back to them last month. there’s a high chance i didn’t. and while i was watching all those videos, performances, dance practices, variety shows - my eyes were mostly only on Takuya. so... Seyoung... how did you do it?

to be honest, i literally have no idea. it just happened. like that. woke up one day thinking about Seyoung. feels like he’s been on my mind forever. no thoughts, head empty. only Seyoung. and within a week, just like that, i've become SO IN LOVE with Lee Seyoung.

for some reason, this feels different. i was obsessed with quite a few idols in the past, but i can’t remember ever feeling for them what i’m feeling for Seyoung right now. maybe it’s because i’m older and actually have a boyfriend so it feels more mature, less crazy, more respectful. even though i’ll admit i also feel [redacted] to him which is also the first time but eh... happens i guess.

but one thing i really need to mention is... just how attached i became to him, even within a week.

when i first found out about Cross Gene, JG hadn’t been part of the group for a while. “my” Cross Gene has always been with Seyoung, not that i have anything against JG at all, of course - but i don’t have any particular attachment to him since i didn’t “grow” with him. Seyoung however, feels like a natural piece of Cross Gene to me. like he’s always been there, and like he belongs there. i can’t imagine Cross Gene without him, even though their first two albums were without him. and that brings me to...

as i said earlier, i’ve been listening to Cross Gene’s entire discography on loop for weeks on end now. this includes their Timeless albums, sung with JG. i’m used to those versions, and i don’t mind them. JG is a good vocalist and the songs are good. but everything changes when they perform them at a concert.

i watched a few concerts (whatever i could find), i’ve heard La-Di Da-Di and New Days with Seyoung, and i couldn’t really think of anything about them. i like having Seyoung there. obviously, it sounds different, as JG and Seyoung have critically different vocals, but i couldn’t think of anything else other than enjoying the performance.

then i watched their With U concert. there, they performed Sky High.

youtube

i watched knowing Sky High is a song on Timeless, so originally sung with JG. i watched full of expectations of how Seyoung’s version is gonna sound like.

in Sky High, JG’s first lines are the second part of the first chorus. that’s a full minute before he starts singing. i watched this performance with my eyes on Seyoung. the way he watches the rest of the members before his turn comes.

i had no idea what was gonna hit me.

Seyoung started singing and i started crying. literal tears in my eyes. i don’t think i’ve ever cried over someone’s voice before.

it sounded so different. this wasn’t the version i’m used to, and yet, it felt so natural. it felt like Seyoung belonged there. it felt like Seyoung had been singing this song forever. it felt like this was Seyoung’s song. i felt like i wanted him to keep singing it forever.

and so i cried while listening to this performance. between Seyoung’s beautiful voice, the energy with which he sang and danced, the overall feeling of the performance... i was a complete mess.

there’s someone in the comments of that video saying that they can’t accept Seyoung as a replacement for JG’s parts. this honestly made me realize how deeply attached i am to Seyoung. there’s people who don’t want to hear him sing JG’s parts because they sound too different, and there’s me who cries as soon as he sings two words.

i love Seyoung... i love Seyoung so much.

his nickname within the group is ‘Miracle Gene’.

when i heard him sing Sky High, that’s what i thought.

he really is a miracle.

i’m so glad he’s there with Cross Gene. he belongs there.

my god, i love him so much.

#personal #i dont wanna tag this cross gene but i guess it's about cross gene so eh #cross gene

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find-your-rp-partner · 8 years ago

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playoffs baby (and a *lot* else)

hello hello my baby hello my honey hello my ragtime gal!

hey how are ya my name is emmy and i’m here to search for a new rp partner. a bit about me, i’m 21, canadian, about to start a summer job before returning to college, and i go by she/her pronouns. i reside in the mountain timezone and i am thrilled to hopefully start writing with you.

why should you write with me? because i promise that if i pick up an rp with you i’m gonna put 100 and 10 percent of my effort into our story. i’m looking for a long term typa gig, someone who i can really weave a plot with, someone who digs the cut of my jib. i want us to be able to sob over our characters together late into the night. i want us to exchange songs, playlists, posts found on the internet, aesthetic boards, whatever reminds us of our characters/our plot. i want us to go through our character’s struggles together as well as be able to cheer together when our characters get ahold of their sitch and come up on top. i want us to inspire one another with our writing. it’s gonna be great. you & me honey.

gee, that sounds nice! i’m inclined to agree with ya! but a few things you should know before you go any further: i write anywhere between full lit to lit + to novella style, so expect posts of at least 4 - 6 paragraphs baseline. sometimes i crank out 10. or 20. depends entirely on what’s going on. i write according to situation, with a great amount of detail spent on what my character is thinking/feeling in response to yours. the replies you get will be fully fleshed out & enthralling. i am a stickler for grammar and spelling, though nobody’s perfect, i do occasionally have my slipups. all lowercase text is strictly kept to ooc communication. i will never pressure you into posting or writing ridiculous amounts just to match my post. i want you to have fun too, ya hear? if i’ve had a bit to drink or am about to hit the hay, i’ll wait to post when i can give my post my full attention. usually i’ll be able to post at least once a day, sometimes multiple times a day if we’re in the same or a similar time zone. i also totally understand life happens and sometimes we just need a breather. ♥ i have bipolar depression, and sometimes my depression kicks my ass, but i’ll let you know when that happens.

oh goodness, what else? i write predominantly m/m pairings but i am open to m/f and f/f as well. i do not write high fantasy settings, sorry doll. my interests mostly align with modern day, slice of life kinda stuff, aside from the fandoms i do have. i don’t have many limits besides excessive gore, scat, mpreg, and writing smut for sake of smut. i love my romance just like anyone else does, but it’s got to have plot. our characters have to have chemistry or else i get bored. i haven’t doubled before but i think i’d be down with the right plot. usually i prefer that we play one character each, or we play multiple characters within a plot, but not usually more than one plot at the same time. but!!! i am totally willing to try new things!! just be patient with me as i learn m'kay? also most of my characters are pretty kinky but like, i prefer that we talk about kinks and limits one on one as opposed to airing out my character’s laundry. also- i wanna be your friend ooc. let’s chat. i find it’s so much easier to have muse and post if i enjoy the virtual company of the people i’m writing with.

ok but what do you write?

what *don’t* i write? kidding. here’s a bit of fandom for ya. if i’ve got plots listed, they’re the ideas i have, but i’m totally open to yours as well. stars denote how much i’m craving them. i’ll list the canon characters i write after i list the fandom:

fallout: new vegas & 4: arcade gannon & elder maxson, paladin danse - also got a ton of ocs for both *plot for fallout 4 a: we explore the cut ending to the brotherhood of steel questline, wherein the sole survivor and paladin danse refuse maxson’s final orders for danse, and fight for danse to become the leader of the brotherhood of steel. would likely require you playing maxon or danse and me playing the other, with one of us playing the sole survivor. *plot for fallout 4 b: your/my oc is a double agent for the railroad, with the mission to infiltrate the brotherhood of steel and send intelligence back to the agents back at home base. your/my oc becomes unexpectedly attached to elder maxson through work and circumstance. eventually, your/my oc must make a choice of where their allegiance lies: within the arms of arthur or with the faction they are fighting for. (potentially, we could double and do plot a & b at the same time.)

mafia 2: vito scaletta ***plot for mafia 2 a: we explore the dynamics of a relationship between vito and your oc. your oc could be in a position of great risk- think outside of the mafia, possibly a police officer, prostitute. some position where power dynamics could be played with. if the pairing is m/m we also deal with the themes of internalized homophobia and coming to terms with one’s identity.

*bioshock 1, 2 & infinite: brigid tenbenbaum, andrew ryan, frank frontaine & eleanor lamb, sofia lamb & booker dewitt

**marvel cinematic universe: tony stark, steve rogers

**greater marvel universe: logan howlett, carol danvers

***the office: pam beesly, angela martin

but honestly where my heart lies is within oc rp. here are a few plots i have of mine, stars denote how much i’m craving them:

**(m/m) power & politics: my oc is a prestigious state senator, who lives a double life. he is currently in the closet with no intent on leaving it anytime soon. however, a certain someone falls into his life, making him question what he thought he knew for certain. your oc breaks down the walls my oc has put up and changes him into a softer, better man. however, with an upcoming presidential campaign on the horizon for my oc, the limits of the secret relationship will be pushed and pulled beyond what both parties have ‘signed up for.‘

****(m/m) the guardian: your oc is a newcomer to the nhl but is quickly making waves- think connor mcdavid style. he’s young and impressive, but mostly, impressionable. he starts to get battered around by both his teammates and opposing teams. after a few hard hits and fowl play within the game that have cost your oc bench and recovery time, the team’s coach calls in reinforcements to boost the team’s morale and serve as a protector to your oc. my oc is a winger who hasn’t got the talent part but has got a huge heart. not to mention… huge hands. good for makin’ fists. good for fightin’. my oc protects your oc during the games, coming to your oc’s aid, picking fights for your oc and protecting him on the ice. as such, the two wingers grow attached to one another.. perhaps too attached for the coach to be comfortable with. possibilities for a love triangle and other complications, for sure.

***(m/m or m/f) two worlds: your oc is a figure skater. my oc is a goaltender. both happen to share practice/warm-up ice and, in my oc’s effort to show off and win your oc over, he injures himself. one awkward trip to the er later, while under the influence of a huge amount of morphine, my oc admits his attempted double axel was prompted by the simple thought of how cute your oc is. this plot starts simple but compounds, with the two struggling with their careers and seeing one another, as well as my oc’s battle with alcoholism & painkiller addiction within the nhl.

***(m/m) too good to be true: our ocs start out in the whl, both as promising wingers. their good chemistry is vital to bringing back their team’s success. however, one of our ocs starts to get too attached to the other, and when an nhl draft separates them, one of our ocs is all too eager to cut contact and try to forget. the two excel in their nhl careers without one another, and end up on nhl teams with a history of deep rivalry. occasionally, the gloves hit the ice, fueled by the tension of unresolved feelings and the pressure of the respective teams to keep up the rivalry. the two are reunited when they are both chosen to play nationally for the same team, and are forced to reconcile what they have both buried so deeply within them.

***(m/m) big money: these two ocs play for rival teams in the nhl. while their teams have a history of tension, our two ocs take it to the next level. audiences are more excited to watch these two fight than they are to watch the game itself. there’s a market in the violence between these two, and a reputation to maintain on both ends. if the public found out that these two were secretly seeing one another, their careers would both be over.

i recognize that a lot of these focus on the nhl/the lives of professional hockey players- please don’t be worried about hockey knowledge/nhl jargon/whatever else goes through your head! i’m more interested in sport as a realm for drama than i am for following the rulebook and being 100% accurate to life when it comes to hockey. there’s a lot i don’t know and am still needing to learn, myself! as for general oc ideas, here’s a list:

professor x student

veteran x civillian

cop x criminal

street racing, fast-and-furious-esque setting

rival gangs

nhl/hockey based (lol obviously)

small town canadiana or americana

fun, fluffy romance based modern settings

darker themes such as addiction, abuse, etc

historical setting- preferably, the second world war/1940s-1960s

honestly whatever you can pitch to me that isn’t high fantasy ☺

hell yeah let’s do this pal

if any, and i mean any, of this piqued your fancy, pleaaaase shoot me an email at

↳ [email protected] !

i will respond! but please send me something thoughtful! i’d like to hear what part of my ad that you’re interested in/why you chose to contact me. i am willing to rp over email or over skype. just let me know. i’d like to email back and forth a little bit before we get right into it & before i give out my skype. i am totally down to chat via google hangouts, i prefer it, but i’ll use skype too. i want to get to know ya! i sure look forward to hearing from you! ✌ & ♥ emmy

#rp partner search #rp partner ad #rp ad #rp search #original #marvel #mcu #videogame #email #skype #submission

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naomi-l-tiessen-blog · 8 years ago

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Tips on Finding Inspiration to Write

Helllloooooo everybody ~

Happy Thursday Blogday!

So, you've finally done it. You’ve broken through the writing hiatus. You've admitted defeat, and know in your heart of hearts that it's time to brush off the dust on your novel baby and write again. So……now what?

I’m not all that fond of musicals, but one exception is Moulin Rouge. I LOVE that movie. Ewan McGregor can serenade me anytime. Alright, eassssy there, Scarlette, focus. I promise this weird little story has a point. One of my favorite parts of the movie is when Christian, one of the main protagonists, moves to Paris to fulfill his dream of writing about love. Only, hold up *record scratches to a halt*…Christian doesn’t know a thing about love. In the words of the Great Swedish Chef: Vurt Da Furk.

Christian has a passion for love, is motivated beyond all belief to write about it, has 100% gumption to write, but he lacks inspiration. Awkward.

The same thing often happens to writers. They have a passion for writing, and are incredibly motivated up the ying-yang to write, but sometimes, as much as we don’t want to admit it, the inspiration well runs a little dry.

If you thought you were the only one that experienced this, don’t worry, you aren’t. Get off your pedestal…you aren’t special (despite what yo mama says…oh snap!).

Everyone goes through this from time to time. And that’s totally fine.

“But Scarlette, you wrote about motivation just a couple weeks ago! Isn’t motivation and inspiration the same thing?”

First of all, great question! Second of all, how dare you even think that?? Just kidding. But in all seriousness, they aren’t the same thing. Motivation is the act of psyching yourself up. Chest-pounding, head-banging, screaming profanities until your lungs ache…that sort of stuff. It’s getting pumped up to do something maybe you don’t want to do, but know you need to. Whether it’s for finishing your manuscript, getting published, or for the greater good of mankind, motivation is all about finding the strength to get from point A to point B. Sometimes it’s positive, and sometimes it’s negative. Inspiration is passion-driven, coming from within. It’s about being tuned in with your inner self, being in alignment with whatever makes you “tick”. Often, when you are inspired, you can feel it in your bones, and you set out on your own path to seek fulfillment. Inspiration might not always be obviously productive, but generally the end result is positive on account of self-discovery and true, natural growth. Think of it this way: inspiration is the engine, and motivation is the vehicle. Each has their own individual purpose, but together, they become a force to be reckoned with. Inspiration and motivation often go hand in hand, and help feed one another.

Ok, lesson over. Class dismissed.

Just kidding, you still need to finish reading my blog.

Here are 10 tips on sparking your inspiration for your writing journey! Now, these are just 10 tips in a sea of millions and millions of ideas. These ones are some of my favorites that I find work best for me. Some of these might mesh well with your writer’s soul, and some of them might not. And that’s ok! There are plenty more ideas where these came from.

1) Music. What are you listening to? Is it clashing with the scene you are writing? Maybe rocking out to Celine Dione's "My Heart Will Go On," is not the best material to be listening to when you are writing an epic battle sequence featuring a shit ton of blood and gore. Personally, I can't listen to lyrical music (brain stops working, and silly Scarlette starts writing down the lyrics instead), so I opt for orchestral goodness. Anything from Lord of the Rings scores, to video game soundtracks and remixes, to dubstep. The thing about these types of playlists is they have a wide range of genres to fit into the mood you are trying to write. Switch it up!

2) Carry around a little notebook and pen so you can jot down anything that is potential writing material. You never know when inspiration will strike, and Life seems to know when you are un-prepared, the sneaky bastard. How many times has this happened to you: you are walking along and suddenly a string of dialogue trickles through your unsuspecting mind. Or you see someone who has an uncanny resemblance to a character in your novel, but has a couple traits you didn’t think to include. Or you are sitting in a coffee shop and overhear a conversation that would fit in oh-so perfectly with that scene you’ve been stuck on for aggggeeeessss. Seriously, inspiration and ideas are literally all around you, just begging for you to take notice. So you, brimming with excitement, reach for the notebook you could’ve sworn you put in your bag the other day. Only it’s not there, because you are a writer and have way too many notebooks to possibly keep track of. In a mad panic, you look for something, anything to write on, but it’s too late; just like that, the moment is gone. Has this happened to me? Never! *goes and cries quietly in the corner*.

3) Try looking at your manuscript from a different angle. No, I don’t mean flipping it upside down (unless that works for you?). And no, I don’t mean pulling a Big Hero 6 and having someone hold YOU upside down, either (…unless THAT works for you?). What I mean is, if staring at your manuscript waiting for inspiration to strike simply isn’t working, try something else. For me, if I know exactly what I want my characters to say, but I’m stuck on when they say it, I’ll make dialogue my priority. I’ll write out every.single.thing I want my characters to say in bullet form, and once it’s all out of my head and safely on my computer screen, I’ll work on filling in the blanks. Sometimes it’s hard thinking about everything at once (dialogue, setting, tags, emotions, etc), so freeing up some space in your noggin helps the ideas flow a bit easier. Side-note, this also helps me figure out whether my dialogue is helping properly propel (say that ten times fast) my story forward, or if it’s just a waste of space. Bonus!

4) Change it up. Go outside, get some fresh air. Get the blood flowing. Now, I’m not always a physically-active person, but going for a little walk is a great way to blow off steam, help the frustration fizzle out, and allow new ideas to present themselves. And if exercise (or leaving your house) isn’t exactly your cup of tea, maybe try something else. Stop staring at your computer screen and maybe start writing longhand for a bit. Take a break to do a writing prompt instead. Go on the internet and look at pictures for character and setting inspiration. Read inspirational quotes from other authors (seriously, my saving grace). Host an emergency dance party. Try something different!

5) Have a writing buddy? Maybe bounce ideas off each other. Once my friend and I were playing a game of Scrabble before initiating our writing date, and for every word we created, we had to tell an elaborate story about said word, as well as how it corresponded to any word it was attached to. By the end of it, we had concocted completely ridiculous stories. But this really helped us tap into our creative sides, helped the brain juices (shit balls…how does this saying keeping making it into my blog?!) start flowing (…disgusting). You can also use your writing buddy to be your soundboard for ideas you aren’t 100% sure about. If you don’t have a writing buddy, have no fear! Have you ever thought really hard about something, and it seems damn-near genius, perfect, Nobel Prize worthy in your sweet little naïve head? Then you open your mouth, and nothing but garbage comes out? And as you are talking, you see your audience’s face fall with confusion, and all you can think is, “oh God. No. Please stop. Just stop talking. YOU’RE MAKING IT WORSE!” And it’s at this point that you realize that it sounded SO much better in your head? Ok, well, to save you the embarrassment, I’ll tell you right now that you don’t always need an audience. Unless you have a fur-baby. I’d like to think that they count as audience members. But sometimes all you need is a quiet room, some walking space to pace around, and maybe a squishy stress ball to wring your pent-up aggression into. And when you are good and ready, talk to the walls. The act of talking out loud, even if it’s just to yourself, will help you hear the mistakes and holes in your ideas, or help create new ideas altogether. If this still doesn’t work, try recording yourself, wait for a chunk of time, and listen to the recording (while trying not to cringe on how weird you sound).

6) Be a stereotypical writer. People watch, eavesdrop, watch the world blaze forward with you on the sidelines, like a ninja in the shadows. Or a really creepy stalker. I like the ninja reference better, so we are going to stick with that one. Watch TV and movies. Listen carefully to the dialogue, how the characters react, how the scenes are set up. Read books and graphic novels. Look at the character’s facial expressions and figure out how you’d describe what emotion they are portraying in your own work. Use all this to help feed your creativity and spark your thoughts until they are running wild with ideas.

7) Find something that feeds your creativity monster. For some, it might be the smell of coffee, or meditating, or doodling. For me, I daydream a lot; I let scenes from my story play out in my head like a movie. I watch my characters react, listen to them talk, add quirks that make them more human, personable. Find some sort of habit or hobby that tends to help the ideas naturally flow easier without you having to force them out of hiding. BUT, with that said, obviously have limitations. Don’t watch an entire Doctor Who or Supernatural season in the name of science and inspiration. No. Bad. Don’t do that.

8) Start a writer's journal to mark your progress. It’s nice to see how far you’ve come! From budding ideas, to plot building, to character developing, outlining, chapter sequences, and world building. All that fun stuff is incredibly handy to keep track of. I often find that if I’m stuck in a rut, I like to read over my old materials and review my journals. It helps remind me of the ideas I might’ve put on the back burner, and re-kindle my excitement on current projects when I see how far my hard work has gotten me. And worst-case-scenario, it’s always good for a laugh at yourself. I have no idea what 16-year-old Scarlette was thinking in some of those earlier entries.

9) Sleep on it. No, seriously. Have you ever noticed that you can spend hours gritting your teeth and pulling out your hair while trying to think of something that is on the tip of your tongue, you can nearly put your finger on it, but it’s just out of reach? And finally, after wasting hours and getting nowhere, frustrated and fed up, you go to bed. And right when you are about to fall asleep, in that weird, limbo state between awake and asleep, that certain something pops into your head with ease. Know why? It’s because your subconscious is relaxing. You aren’t distracted by life around you, thus allowing your subconscious to come forward, unfiltered and uninhibited, free from cognitive obstacles of the day. Granted, this can happen during the day as well (it’s happened to me when I’m waiting to board a bus, or standing in line at a grocery store), but it isn’t as regular, as common sense often kicks in before your subconscious has a chance to make an appearance. Having said that, don’t beat yourself up about spending hours upon hours thinking hard and coming up empty-handed; often all that thinking helps drive the ideas forward, making it easier for your subconscious to present them later on.

10) Simply write. You can't just sit around waiting for your Muse to stroll through the door; you can't rely on that flaky bitch. You might end up waiting a couple hours, which can then turn to days, months, years, etc. It's not a safe tactic, unless you are totally cool with your book being done in 10 years. It's up to you and you alone to get the words onto the paper. Worry about editing later. Just focus and breaking through that block and finding the inspiration behind it.

And that’s it! There are tons of ways to get inspired out there if you know where to look. The world is bursting with ideas just waiting to get plucked by our eager writer minds. These are just a few options, but they are still quite handy! What are some ways that you get inspired to write?

With that said, I post new blogs every Thursday, and if there is anything you’d like me to discuss, feel free to message me on here, or tweet me @ScarletteStone

Until next time,

Happy Writing!

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