#with some drama and mistakes and silliness on the side

[theragamuffininitiative]

Rewatched the Adam 12 pilot tonight. I just really needed to fix my brain chemistry after being disappointed by The Rookie (sorry). XD Anyways, Pete Malloy and Jim Reed are my LAPD training officer and rookie duo of all time. Best fictional officers to ever don a uniform and they didn't have to make a bunch of extremely illegal/unauthorized/dangerous choices on the way. 👏

[ducktoo]

Syncing Dream [Aespa x M!Reader]

17. Big bang

Note: What’s a good fluff without some angst, right? Welcome to Arc 3!

Masterlist here

The buzz of excitement surrounding aespa’s upcoming comeback, "Supernova," was palpable. The group was in full swing with high-energy rehearsals, promotional activities, and media appearances. Every member was eager and motivated, their enthusiasm infectious—except for Y/n, who was starting to feel the pressure of managing it all.

It wasn’t just any comeback. This was aespa’s first major project Y/n is with since their last hit, "Drama." Back then, Y/n had been new to the world of managing a high-profile group.

Just to recount his mistakes: overlooked details, misplaced props and costumes, and misjudged the balancing act of handling both the group’s needs and the management’s expectations…among other things.

The experience had been a steep learning curve, and Y/n had vowed never to mess up like that again. But now, with the weight of "Supernova" looming large, the pressure was back—and it was relentless.

“Y/n, please check through this.”

“Look over this again, please.”

“When can they be available for this shoot”

Y/n tried to manage it all, running through a mile-long to-do list each day. Yet, it felt like everything was slipping through his fingers. Meetings were getting missed, calls went unanswered, and small mistakes started to pile up. The perfection he was aiming for seemed further away with every passing hour.

“I will die of stress before I actually get a girlfriend…” Y/n complained. “Why does my perfection side is so stingy…”

In the middle of a particularly hectic day, Y/n stumbled into aespa’s practice room, his mind a whirlwind of incomplete tasks and urgent reminders. The members were deep into their dance practice, their movements precise and synchronized. Yet, the usual buzz of energy seemed overshadowed by a growing sense of concern for their manager.

Karina, noticing Y/n’s disheveled appearance and distracted demeanor, exchanged worried looks with the rest of the group. It was clear that the stress of managing to "Supernova" was taking a toll. The same dedication and enthusiasm that Y/n had once brought to the job now seemed overwhelmed by the weight of expectations and a relentless schedule.

“We need to do something,” Winter said quietly, her gaze following Y/n as he absently tapped away at his phone. “That idiot has been working so hard, and it’s starting to show.”

“Let’s try to lighten the mood,” Ningning suggested. “Maybe a bit of fun might help him relax.”

The members agreed, rallying together to devise a plan that would bring some levity into Y/n’s increasingly overwhelming days. They decided on a series of harmless pranks designed to elicit a genuine smile from their manager, hoping to lift his spirits and alleviate some of the stress.

-

Their first prank was an elaborate setup in Y/n’s office table (surprisingly, he does have one). The girls filled the room with balloons, covering every surface with bright, cheerful colors. When Y/n finally opened the door, he was greeted by a cascade of balloons tumbling out into the hallway.

Despite the initial laughter from the girls, Y/n’s expression remained strained. He looked around the balloon-filled room, his shoulders slumping slightly as he muttered, “This is… a lot.”

Next came the "fake meeting" prank. Ningning and Winter organized a mock emergency meeting, complete with exaggerated urgency and absurd scenarios. They managed to get Y/n to rush into a room, only to find it filled with the group, all of them giggling uncontrollably.

Though Y/n cracked a smile, the humor didn’t quite cut through his mounting stress. He rubbed his temples and said, “I appreciate the effort, but I really can’t afford to be wasting time right now.”

Finally, Karina took a more personal approach. She decided to write a series of humorous notes and stick them all over Y/n’s workspace. The notes were filled with exaggerated compliments and silly reminders, like “Don’t forget to breathe!” and “You’re a big boss in disguise!”

Though the gesture was heartfelt, the humor was lost on Y/n, who felt overwhelmed by the sheer volume of tasks. He took down the notes with a weary sigh, thinking, “I don’t know if this is helping or just making things more confusing.”

The members’ pranks, though well-intentioned, only seemed to add to Y/n’s sense of chaos. His stress was bubbling up, and the cracks were beginning to show. And then, the final straw came.

A small argument over scheduling became the breaking point.

-

Y/n was sitting at his spot, barely keeping it together when Karina walked up, holding a clipboard and asking about a last-minute change to their upcoming promotional event. Y/n, already stretched thin, didn’t even look up.

“Jimin, I’ve told you a hundred times, this isn’t feasible!” His voice came out sharper than he intended, but he was too far tired to notice.

Karina blinked, surprised by the intensity in Y/n’s tone. “I get that it’s tight, but we need to make this change if we want to get the timing right.”

Y/n finally looked up, his frustration evident. “I’m juggling a thousand things, Rina-ya. We can’t just change things on a whim because you think it’ll be better!”

The air in the room shifted, growing tense. Karina’s eyes narrowed slightly, her own frustration bubbling to the surface. “I’m not asking for a whim, Y/n. I’m asking because it is better. We need to be more flexible, or this comeback isn’t going to work.”

The argument escalated quickly. Y/n’s stress had reached a breaking point, and he found himself raising his voice more than he intended. “Ya, You think I don’t know that?! I’m trying to keep everything from falling apart, but every time I fix something, three more problems pop up! Do you know how much pressure I’m under right now?”

The tension in the room was thick. Karina took a deep breath, trying to stay calm. “And you think we’re not feeling that too? We’re just as invested in this comeback as you are, Y/n. But you’re shutting us out, and it’s not helping. Also, Ya? I'm older than you, Jung Y/n”

Y/n’s hands trembled slightly as he ran a hand through his hair. “Shutting you out? I’m trying to keep us on track! Every time I turn around, there’s another issue to solve, and now you want to add more to my plate? And you think I care about that right now when the work is chewing me out?”

Karina, usually calm and collected, finally snapped. “Maybe if you listened to us instead of thinking you have to do everything alone, we wouldn’t be in this situation!”

Karina sighed, before giving an ultimatum. “This is why we don’t hire manager with no experience.”

There was a moment of silence, a charged stillness that made everyone in the room hold their breath. The argument had reached a point of no return, and Y/n felt something inside him snap.

“Y- y/n, I didn’t mean to-“

Without saying another word, Y/n abruptly stood up from his spot, the chair scraping loudly against the floor. His eyes were filled with frustration and exhaustion. “I can’t— I need some air,” he muttered, his voice low but heavy with emotion.

Before anyone could respond, Y/n turned and bolted out of the room, leaving Karina and the rest of aespa standing there in stunned silence.

The door slammed shut behind him, blocking the worried Winter who was chasing after him. The echo seemed to hang in the air like a physical weight. The members exchanged worried glances, unsure of what to do next.

“Did that… just happen?” Giselle asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

Karina stood frozen, still processing what had just unfolded. The tension that had been simmering for days had finally boiled over, and it left an uneasy silence in its wake.

Ningning, who had been standing by the door, sighed heavily. “This isn’t good. Y/n-oppa never walks out like that.”

Karina bit her lip, guilt gnawing at her. “I didn’t mean for it to get that heated. I just… I don’t know.”

The room was thick with unspoken emotions, and for the first time in a long while, the group felt unsure about their next steps. The light-hearted banter and pranks from earlier now felt like distant memories.

They had wanted to help Y/n relax, but in their attempt to lighten the mood, things had spiraled out of control. Now, with their manager storming out, it was clear that this wasn’t just a bad day—this was the beginning of a much deeper problem.

The silence in the practice room felt suffocating as the members processed the fallout. Karina, usually the one to keep everything steady, now found herself grappling with the uncomfortable realization that things were falling apart.

And no one knew how to fix it.

-

Y/n rushed out of the building, the cool evening air hitting his face as he tried to catch his breath. His heart was racing, his mind a whirlwind of thoughts. He couldn’t believe he’d snapped like that—especially at Karina. But the pressure had been mounting for weeks, and today had finally pushed him over the edge.

He really didn't want to. He's usually good at keeping under pressure, but somehow his chase to perfection chewed him from the inside.

Standing alone in the empty parking lot, Y/n felt a knot of anxiety tightening in his chest. He knew he’d messed up, and the weight of his responsibilities felt heavier than ever. How had things gotten so bad? How had he lost control?

As he stood there, staring up at the darkening sky, Y/n realized that this was more than just a bad day. This was the beginning of something that could tear the group apart if they weren’t careful.

And for the first time, Y/n sobbed, wasn’t sure if he could handle it.

“Y/n?” It was Jihoon, the manager for NCT Dream. He had been walking past when he heard the commotion.

Jihoon took one look at Y/n’s sobbing face and walked over, concern in his eyes. “Hey, you good, man? You look like you’ve been through it.”

Y/n let out a shaky breath, running a hand through his hair. “I’m fine. Just… a lot on my plate right now.”

Jihoon wasn’t buying it. “Come on. We’ve all been there. What happened?”

Before Y/n could answer, Minji, Red Velvet’s manager, appeared from around the corner, also drawn by the sound of the argument. Her eyes widened when she saw Y/n looking visibly shaken. “Y/n, what’s going on? We heard the argument. Are you okay?”

Y/n slumped against the wall, letting out a deep sigh. “I just… I messed up. Everything’s piling up, and I blew up at Karina - we both blew up - over a stupid schedule change. I didn’t mean to—”

“Whoa, whoa,” Jihoon interrupted, holding up his hands. “It’s not stupid if it’s bothering you this much. Managing a comeback is no joke, especially after something like Drama. We all know that.”

Minji crossed her arms, leaning against the wall next to him. “It’s not easy juggling everything. But you can’t do this alone. I get it, you don’t want to mess up, but trying to carry all that weight by yourself? It’s gonna break you.”

Y/n groaned, rubbing his temples. “I just… I don’t want to let them down again. Not after last time. And it took me too long to earn Rina's trust and I managed to mess it up.”

“You won’t,” Jihoon said firmly. “You’re already doing better than you were back then. But you’ve got to ask for help. That’s what the team’s for.”

Minji nodded in agreement. “They’re there for you, Y/n. And I bet Karina didn’t mean to push you either. Sometimes stress makes everything feel bigger than it is.”

Y/n shook his head, guilt weighing heavy on his chest. “I snapped at her. She was just trying to help, and I made it worse.”

"Let's calm it down for a few days, and go apologize to her ok?" Minji pat his back. "Coming it now might actually start a fire here."

"What a time to joke." Y/n popped a chuckled through his tears. "I'll try to work it out."

[sweet-art-o-mine]

HI POOKS EBTUI5JEVTJWGUESN

Is it okay to request some Yuuji x chubby reader ff? I dont really mind if it's smut or fluff, but it would br nice if it's both! TANKEW KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK MWAH

[[I’m so sorry this is like a billion years (9 months oops—) late. I got sad again, gang. Also started college again, and got super busy. I’m writing this like a fever dream at 3am, so I hope you can forgive any mistakes, or ooc moments. This idea was surprisingly difficult because I didn’t want to make it seem like size was an issue for the characters, and I don’t usually include body size indicators when I write haha but I really did try. I hope you can enjoy this little drabble of Yuuji being a total sap for his pretty gf while I get my writing mojo back! - Ami]]

Loverboy (Yuuji Itadori/Reader)

Summary: Yuuji loves his pretty girlfriend…maybe a little too much? Word Count: 1.2k Warnings: NSFW (slightly), slight implied affectionate obsession

There was something about the plush thick of your thighs that practically had Yuuji salivating. His hands run the expanse of your soft tummy, cuddled up to your side like he was glued to you, but his eyes focus in on the little glimpses he catches of your legs under your shorts.

His teeth sink into the skin of his bottom lip, wishing he was brave enough to try and pull you impossibly closer - to grip you by the dip in your thighs and slot himself between your legs for the comfiest cuddle in the world.

The thought of your weight pressing down on him sounded so comforting, and the idea of your soft skin against his own could send him into orbit. If he thought about it for too long, he worried he wouldn’t be able to keep himself under control.

He swallows thickly after another failed attempt to rip his attention away from your bottom half, completely unsuccessful at paying attention to the movie you picked out. I mean, honestly, how could you expect him to watch some silly drama when your cute ass was literally right there? Looking at you was way more interesting than any movie.

He still couldn’t believe you had agreed to that first date with him almost six months ago. He had almost fallen down a flight of stairs chasing after you just to beg for your number. He would’ve groveled at your feet for a chance, honestly. He balked when you turned him down at first - if you looked closely enough, you could probably see his heart shattering into a million pieces - but his invitation to the tiny, family-owned movie theater in the next town over wasn’t the most comfortable date idea.

As much as you liked the idea of getting to know the guy who nearly cried when the words, “sorry, but…” left your pretty lips, the theater chairs were too small and dug into the flesh of your thighs, or the arm rests pressed against your sides in a way that had you constantly shifting to at least feel a little less squished.

Thankfully he seemed to catch on pretty quickly, because he almost instantly suggested coffee instead (after pulling himself together). To which, you agreed.

And nearly half a year later, Yuuji was still obsessed with you; the curve of your hips, the softness of your tummy, and the squish of your thighs. God, you were perfect.

He slides his arms a little further around your waist, pulling you closer with practiced ease, like you weighed nothing. He presses a kiss to the space between your shoulder blades, unable to properly put his feelings into words, even now. But that was okay, he had always been particularly good at showing it.

“Hm?” You hum to get his attention, eyes never leaving the TV screen as you question his sudden display of affection. The only answer you get is another kiss to the round of your shoulder, and you turn your head to glance back at him, letting your curiosity get the better of you. “Yuuji?”

“Sorry,” He mumbles against your skin, pressing a few other quick kisses to your back and shoulder - daring enough to briefly kiss the back of your neck. His bouts of sudden affection were something you were no stranger to, but your eyes meet his without hesitation, and you pause briefly and the way his pupils are blown wide with adoration as he looks at you.

“Are you okay?” You can’t help but ask, like you can’t believe he’s looking at you with that much love in his eyes. No one had ever looked at you like that before Yuuji. Somehow, he made you feel so unbelievably loved, and you weren’t sure you did anything in particular to deserve that.

Of course, to him, you didn’t have to. “Fine,” he answers, shifting behind you just enough to lift his upper half, leaning over your side to kiss at your cheeks, slowly gravitating lower until he reaches the corner of your lips. “You look so pretty…”

“I’m just wearing shorts and a tee-shirt,” you giggle softly, turning your head until your lips meet his in a chaste kiss. “Nothing special,” you muse. He doesn’t seem to care that it’s ’not special’. Just the fact that you’re his girlfriend is special enough to make him feel like he was going crazy.

The way your eyes soften as you look at him, and your pretty lips pull into a smile, paired with your slightly-exposed-but-far-too-tempting skin does something to his brain. He felt like he was melting, every breath leaving him pliant in your hands. A willing victim to your killing beauty.

His heart is beating loudly in his chest, and his blood seems to be rushing lower before he even notices. For some reason, his brain briefly conjures the image of the first time he really kissed you and tortures him with the reminder of how he finished in his pants just from the feeling of making out with you.

He tries to subtly shift his hips away from you, not wanting you to notice the quickly growing arousal in his shorts, but you knew him too well, and a playful smile creeps up on your pretty features.

“You know...you don’t seem fine,” you hum, quickly glancing him over as heat saturates his reddened cheeks. His hormones always seemed to get the best of him when he was so close to you - constantly at war with wanting to be so close to you it would be nearly impossible to separate, and the fact that if he dared to get to close, he’d be playing peek-a-boo with his erections.

“Totally fine,” he replies, attempting to sound cool and collected as he rips his gaze away from you to stare aimlessly at the TV. The TV he was very obviously not paying any attention to despite gazing straight at it like he was paid to do so.

“Feeling hot?” You try to suppress a little laugh, obviously finding his surprisingly innocent reactions adorable. You shift on the couch to face him before sitting up, straddling his legs in a way that instantly has his eyes wide and mouth open.

He almost protests - you shouldn’t be on top of him like that, you obviously look too good! What if his brain turns to jelly because of you? What will he do if Gojo-sensei and the others make fun of him for getting even dumber?

He can feel his heart racing, brain imagining a mile a minute; your flushed, ecstasy-filled face, his cock pressed deep into you. He can almost imagine what your voice would sound like as you climaxed when the touch of your hand dancing around the waistband of his pants snaps him out of his daydreams.

“Wha—? Wait!” He almost whimpers, face hot as he watches you slip your hand under his shirt, lightly tracing the definition of his abdomen before drawing closer to the start of his happy trail poking out of his shorts. “Oh, God,” his breath hitches in his throat as he looks at you, and he’s practically twitching in his pants with anticipation for what you might do next. He could feel the growing dampness in his underwear. “Are you sure…?”

His whole body twitches under your touch as you slip your hand into his shorts. “Let me make your dreams come true?”

[eclairsnme]

♡ POV: Being The Itoshi Brother’s Elder Sister ♡

Part 1/ Part 2/ Part 3/ Part 4

An introduction to the oldest sibling

you are a very popular idol in Japan (˶‾᷄ ⁻̫ ‾᷅˵)

tags: idol!you, crack comedy, reunion, familial love, sfw

notes: well… being popular and also being the eldest of the Itoshi siblings, you are undeniably very dramatic, sassy and gorgeously demanding in every way.

ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•

“Why isn’t he answering my calls!”

You scowled and threw your phone across the room, scaring your manager in the process.

“C-calm down,” your manager scurried to pacify your tantrum.

Pouting cutely as Mr manager massages your back with nervous peals of laughter, you complained, “Does he not love me anymore?”

You just completed your commercial shooting for the day and were looking forward to surprising your cute youngest brother. Why? Well, it is obviously not because you are the most loving sister but because you saw Rin and this blue lock thingamajig on the news by chance٩( ᐛ )و .

It just hit you that you’ve never really stayed in contact with your family members being so busy with your line of work. Being popular is no easy task sigh suffering from success ✌︎('ω')✌︎.

So, seeing your youngest brother in the news instead of yourself prompted you to feign the “concerned-older-sister” role.

In your Versace heels, you sauntered towards the strewn phone. Very bothered and annoyed by how Rin is not picking up the call, you continuously and unyieldingly called him.

And finally, the call went through.

“Rin-”

“WHO ARE YOU AND WHY DO YOU KEEP CALLING ME?! STOP IT!”

Your eyes twitched, “and who are you supposed to be?”

“YOU ARE THE ONE WHO CALLED ME, AREN’T YOU SUPPOSE TO KNOW WHO I AM?”

*BEEP*

The stranger on the other side of the call aggressively put down the phone.

Oh… you got the wrong number. After years of having no contact with Rin obviously, he would have changed his number. Ehe ~

Blushing at your silly mistake, you gripped your phone and quickly dialled another saved contact which you know will definitely be the right number… hopefully ╮(╯▽╰)╭

As soon as you pressed the call button, the other side of the line quickly picked up the call.

“Sister.”

How you missed that deadpan voice that brought you butterflies to your stomach so much that it hurts.

“How can you be so heartless to your sister, Sae,” you dramatically whined at him, “but it flatters me that you picked up the phone so quickly. I think I just fell in love! Aren’t you in Spain right now?”

A quick calculation on Japan and Spain’s time zone, Sae should still be asleep right now. Was it because he is always waiting for his deadly gorgeous sister to call him\(//∇//)\?

But his next sentence brought you out of your delusion.

“I’m in Japan right now, didn’t you see my text?”

“Oh,” you managed to blurt out. You definitely did not see that text. (・・?)

“Why did you call? You rarely call,” Sae broke the silence with a fact.

Yes, a FACT that you never bothered to contact either Sae or Rin since pursuing your dream of becoming an idol at the tender age of 12 years young. It’s been years since you have spoken to them, therefore it’s a fact that you have been a very absent sister.

That does not mean you were not aware of the inner workings and happenings of the Itoshi household. Be it the brothers having some drama between them or Sae finding success in Spain or whatever. You have your own sources, it only depends on how fast or slow news reaches you, an example being the ever-so-elusive Rin.

You quickly cleared your throat and proposed, “Let's go on a date to catch up since you are in Japan!”

At the very corner of the room, Mr manager stumbled upon the very word “date”.

“That’s impossible,” Sae said word for word leaving you extremely astonished.

“Why?”

Sae mentally sighed at you —his sister. He always knew you weren’t the brightest star in the sky but he did not want to explain that you being the most popular idol in Japan and him being the best football player in Japan casually hanging out together in public despite being siblings is just a present for the media —literally making it Christmas for them.

He could already imagine the headlines.

“Are you embarrassed by your sister, Mr hotshot,” Sae's lips drew a line at your overly dramatic tendencies.

“No… let’s just not meet in public,” he tried to compromise.

There was a silence on the other side of the line until you spoke up, “Alright then, 12:30pm at my house.”

“Ok. When- ”

“Today.”

Sae looked at his watch: 11am. He didn’t really have any plans today too.

“Ok.”

“I’ll send you the location!” With that, you hung up the phone.

Yet again, Sae let out another long mental sigh. He got some explaining to do to his manager.

You on the other hand, mentally cheered.

Whatever you want, you got it. Talk about being extremely demanding — thank goodness your little brother was extremely compliant.

~

Hearing the doorbell ring, you wasted no time opening the door and embraced the person in front of you not caring about personal space.

Sae could only stand still hands still on each side of his body — stood rooted on the ground.

“You’ve grown so tall!” You took a good look at Sae. Oh, what a handsome young man he has grown into! You wondered how many girl's hearts he has broken with his devilish looks, especially with that deadpan expression of his.

“That goes the same for you too.”

That is true, you were above the average female height making companies want to hire you to be their model. Perfect body, perfect face — the perfect recipe for being the most popular idol! ☆〜（ゝ。∂）

“Don’t you miss your sister?” You smiled cheekily awaiting his response.

“Not really,” as expected from your younger brother.

“Don’t be so cold~ I prepared some of your favourite dishes.” You led Sae into the dining room. The table was filled with delivery food.

She must’ve rushed to order all these, Sae thought to himself.

Despite being a cold and arrogant football player, Sae still knows how to respect his elders. He sat on the chair and slowly helped himself.

“Eat up!” You cheered.

You took a sit in front of Sae eyeing him as he elegantly ate the food with the most immaculate posture.

The reason why you called Sae out or more accurately over to your house was to obviously get Rin’s number.

You could have easily gotten his number from your parents but before your brain could get to that idea, Sae was already in front of you. So uh why not just ask him. (๑･̑◡･̑๑)

You wouldn’t consider yourself stupid, and some people might even call you a bimbo oh the audacity, but that’s beside the point!!

“Do you have a girlfriend?” That was your way to break the ice. Ehe~ ✌︎('ω')✌︎

“No time for that.”

“Does Rin have a girlfriend?”

“Sister.” Sae stopped and eyed you.

“So does he?” Ignorance was a blessing so you keenly eyed Sae waiting for his response.

“…”

“Can I have his number then?” You shamelessly took out your phone and gave it to Sae not caring if he was uncaring or not.

To be honest, you weren’t too sure if Sae had Rin’s number due to their damn drama going on but part of you were confident Sae had it. After all, he’s an older brother to Rin.

And true enough, he did have Rin’s number. Sae took your phone and inserted Rin’s number without referring to his phone, meaning he knew his number by heart.

Oho~

You took back your phone and smiled, “what a good brother you are.”

Sae did not say a thing to that.

“So where are you staying while you are here in Japan?”

“Hotel.”

Hotel? Hmmm, you could finally be a good older sister if you allowed him to stay in your penthouse. That is right! What a great idea from my brilliant mind!

“Come stay with me,” you offered, or more like you demanded, “Don’t reject me please, Sae.”

You held both of his hands with a good grip and looked at him with your best puppy eyes that won the hearts of millions. No way he can say no right? PLEASE JUST SAY YES.

Sae wavered and thought about it. He would immediately leave after the U-20 Japan vs Blue Lock match, so it’s just a temporary adjustment.

“Ok.” He surrendered.

Plus, he could never win against his only older sister.

-

Ring. Ring. Ring.

Rin looked at the unknown number and decided to ignore the call.

“Who was that?” Isagi, who was beside him doing yoga, asked him.

“Unknown.”

“What if it’s someone or something important?”

“If it’s so important then I would already have the number saved already, no?”

-

“Rin-” you sobbed (crocodile tears ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ), “he really don’t care about me anymore…”

It’s nighttime, and you are in your silk pyjamas still trying to get through Rin to no avail. Sae who is on the sofa highly entertained, listening to your ruckus like it’s a soap opera.

Then it really dawned on you — the realisation that what if Rin really hates you. But you quickly dismissed the idea.

Nah no way~ Rin doesn’t even hate Sae. He’s just being a tsundere, plus, he’s still going through puberty!♪(´ε｀ )

You looked over to Sae and asked him, “How am I supposed to get close to cute little Rin Rin?”

Sae thought to himself about the upcoming U-20 Japan vs Blue Lock match. He was about to suggest to you to watch them play, however, he soon realised that you aren’t just a normal person — you, Miss Top Idol, watching a football match. Let that sink in.

-

-time skip-

Murmurs and excitement filled the stadium on match day.

Although it’s not summer, you dressed in all black — black fedora, black jacket, black pants, black sunglasses and black mask — it was a portable sauna. All that trouble to disguise yourself to not garner attraction.

Breathing heavily under the mask, your sunglasses began to fog up. You swear you looked like the most suspicious person right this second.

Not only that, sweaty spectators were all around you. How could a renowned celebrity like you stand this kind of treatment?

You stared long and hard at the empty football field. Where are they?

This was taking too long and you were starting to get very impatient and uncomfortable.

Slowly you took out your fedora, letting out your silky dark hair to flow out of its restraints.

The next second, you took out your jacket. Underneath was a simple white shirt that revealed your smooth skin.

As the time ticked away, you also took out the mask — that to be very honest, was starting to annoy you, your sunglasses kept getting fogged up! (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥｀)

Not knowing when the match was going to start, you tapped on the shoulder of the young boy right next to you.

“When is it going to start?”

The young boy turned and felt something stuck in his throat. The moment he laid eyes on you he thought you were a celebrity. Even though the sunglasses were hiding half of your face, he really thought you looked like someone famous.

“E-eh,” he stuttered.

“Eh?” You repeated after him.

“There! They are about to come out!” His attention was immediately drawn to the field.

The roars of the crowd erupted throughout the stadium as U-20 Japan and Blue Lock emerged to the field.

You squinted as hard as possible trying to take a good look at the players.

Sae and Rin then appeared in your line of sight, both of them in different jerseys.

SAE! RIN! You felt yourself feeling more excited than you should.

-

Sae’s eyes course through the crowd to your allotted seat (that he assigned you to). Rin, who was right beside Sae, followed his brother’s line of sight.

Rin found out that his brother was looking at a woman. She was waving at Sae (or someone else, it was hard to tell with the crowd) animatedly. But the more he looked at the woman in sunglasses, the more she looked awfully familiar.

“Sister?” Rin finally spoke up.

Rin momentarily reminisce the days when he would be in the warm embrace of his sister whenever he cried.

But before any sappy sibling reunion, the match between the two brothers was just about to start.

-

Aww~ Rin also grew up so handsomely, and to think he is taller than Sae. You thought to yourself, happy.

As the match went on, you were met with a conundrum. Which team should you be supporting?

When U-20 Japan scored a goal, you cheered. When Blue Lock scored a goal, you cheered.

The young boy beside you was also confused as to who you supported.

The match continued with great intensity. You continued with your cheering in spite of not knowing too much about football.

In the end, Blue Lock won and the crowd went crazy.

You saw Sae talking to Rin in the middle of the field. Sae looked impassive as usual and Rin, you noticed, had an expression on him that caused your elderly sister's instinct to activate.

-

Turns out, what you witnessed was the part where Sae was gassing up Isagi instead of acknowledging Rin’s growth as a striker.

“-and,” Sae continued, “your sister has been calling out for you. Don’t ignore her.”

Rin stared at Sae’s back as he parts from him.

True enough, when he turned back to the crowd, he saw you mouthing his name.

Rin jogged towards your seating area and as he approaches, his right hand rubbed the back of his neck feeling bashful.

-

Up top at the spectator's seat, you saw Rin jogging towards you.

You hasten your steps down the stairs and gave your littlest (and very sweaty) brother the warmest embrace.

“You did great,” you softly whispered.

No matter how big he gets, he is still a kid.

“H-hey, isn’t that the popular idol?” The murmurs in the crowd continued, interrupting your reunion.

The spectators soon became privy to the idol in the stadium.

How did this come to be?

Well, to put it simply, you carelessly took off your last remaining “cover-up” —your sunglasses— in the heat of the moment as soon as the match ended. ˚✧₊⁎❝᷀ົཽ≀ˍ̮ ❝᷀ົཽ⁎⁺˳✧༚

To say the least, the very next day news began pouring out about the Itoshi Siblings.

☆〜（ゝ。∂）the end (for now) ☆〜（ゝ。∂）

<;no pairings yet! *evil laughing* I plan to create a blue lock harem>

Part 2

[darlingshane]

Salt of the Earth ~ Part 2

Pairing: Michael Berzatto x OFC

Summary: She was Carmy's best friend growing up, and Michael never looked at her as anything other than that until years later when she comes back to Chicago to start over. In the process, she turns his sorry excuse of a life upside down.

Content/Warnings: 18+. Explicit, Friends to lovers, Fluff, Heavy Angst, Smut, HJ, Fingering, P in V, Family Drama, Dysfunctional relationships, Addiction, Alcohol, Hangover, Pets, Pet names, Dialogue heavy, Undisclosed age gap.

Word Count: 7.5k // Chapters 5-7 // AO3 Link.

— Part 1 (Chapters 1-4)

Chapter 5: Eat Humble Pie

One more mistake turns into a lesson learned for Maya.

She climbs into her car before breaking in front of him and drives back home after the party to dwell in her misery.

It was silly of her to make herself available for someone who doesn't take her seriously half of the time. She should have seen it earlier that he's just an asshole, but being blindsided by guys like him is one of her many flaws.

Against her better judgment, she put herself out there for the first time in a long time. He knew that was a huge step for her, and he just had the nerve to dismiss her feelings.

She's not the one to play games with. If Michael can admit that there's something between them, then she's not going to invest more time on this or push for something he doesn't want. Maybe she’s being a little arrogant, it wouldn't be the first time someone told her that, but this wasn’t a one-sided thing. He’s been definitely reeling her in just as much. She felt that every morning she went into the beef before work, every time they went out for drinks, every time he came over, every call, every text… He initiated a lot of those. Who does he think he is to make her feel like she's crazy? Like she made that up in her head? It could be possible, she tries to internalize. Perhaps she latched onto Michael so desperately because he was the only person that made her feel welcomed. It was strange for a long time being back in Chicago and being with him felt like being home.

Her mind jumps back and forth, trying to find a logical explanation. She doesn't find any, but she's sure he has his reasons.

Trying to forget all that and more, it’s not easy.

A week after his birthday, there’s still a part of her that keeps holding onto all those moments and memories they’ve made together. From painting her room, to the day she took care of him when he got his wisdom teeth removed. To all the many nicknames he gave her. And that time, he dog-sat for Coco when Maya went out of town for a couple of days. He’d just sent pics and videos of them playing, so she wouldn’t worry. It’s still fresh in her memory the day he invited her to his Sunday Braciole tradition. They weren’t as frequent as they used to be since Carmy left, but at least two Sundays a month they got together to cook and eat, and just have a good time with friends and family. For the past two months, she never missed one of those Sundays, but it was a hard pass this week. She got a text from Natalie asking if she was okay, that they missed her and Coco, but she was far from okay. Maya just replied with some bullshit about coming down with something.

Many times she’s found herself wanting to pick up the phone and call him as she used to. She willingly had to fight that need every day until it disappeared.

One evening, when she comes home after work, pulling up on the driveway, she spots Michael sitting on her front stoop, having a smoke under the light of the porch. It’s dark and cold and the last thing she wants to do right now is face him, but there’s no way around it.

“Hey,” She mutters, walking up to the door as he puts out his cigarette and stands up.

“Hey, can we talk?” His breath manifests in the air, as he exhales that last puff he took.

“Depends on what you have to say,” Maya crosses her arms against her chest.

“Just wanted to say I’m sorry for being an asshole the other night. I never got to say thank you for the party. That was really nice of you.”

“That's fine, Michael. I'm over it. I got the message,” she says dryly.

“This isn't as easy as you think it is.”

“I think it is. Either you want me or you don't. But you can't string someone along for months, and then make them feel like shit for wanting something more. It's fucked up.”

“Yeah, I agree it's fucked up. I'm… fucked up.”

“I'd say.”

“Hey, you're no picnic either, sweetheart.”

“You're right, I'm not. But at least I'm honest about it. I admit that I can be a little intense and inconsiderate, but I don't try to hide it. You on the other hand hide behind layers and layers of fake smiles and charms and bullshit stories, cause if people were to look closer, they'd see the real Michael. The one that I see.”

“You're also unbelievably obnoxious, did you know that? You don't know shit about me.”

“Keep telling yourself that.”

“Have you even considered my part in all this, huh? You're Carmy's best friend. I knew you as a kid. How am I supposed to look him in the eye when he comes back in a few weeks and say – hey, by the way, I've been seeing Maya… Your Maya. What do you think he’s going to say? He's gonna hate the both of us.”

It's good to know he's considered all those things that didn't cross her mind. Yes, it'd hurt her to know that Carmy could potentially be affected by this. She wouldn't want that either, but no matter what, someone is getting hurt here.

“Well, I haven't thought about it that way, but I was never his to begin with. I’m my own person. I get to decide who I want. Not you, not him, not anyone. And even if something happened between you and me, it’s not like I’d rub it on his face.”

“Maya… You don't understand. You were everything to him.”

“Were. You’ve just said it. It's been a long time since high school, do you really believe that he's still hung up on me?”

“What if he is? What if you two were meant to be together?”

“Saying that out loud over and over won't make it come true. This isn't a fairy tale. And you should know that I haven't really talked to him, not one real conversation, since last year. Last time I heard from him was a text telling me he got the job at Noma. I said hey, congratulations, I'm proud of you… And he never spoke to me again. Told him I was moving back here, and crickets. And you know what? I still love him cause he's Carmy, but I'm not in love with him. I wish it was that easy. It'd be great if people could fall in love with the person they were supposed to be with. But it doesn't work that way, Michael.”

“Look, I know it's hard to understand, but I'm not the right guy for you. I'll never be. I thought we could be friends, but I can tell that's not enough for you, is it?”

“No, it isn't. If you feel that way, you should just go. It’s cold. I’m tired. And I should…” Defeated, she vaguely gestures at the front door before climbing the porch's steps.

“It hurts for me too, you know?” He mumbles as she unlocks the door.

“How’s that my problem?” She scoffs, incredulous at the gall he has of driving up there just to cause her more grief, and guilt-trip her. At least that is how it seems right now to her. “You’re the one that is too scared to feel anything real. I told you how I feel. I kissed you, for Christ’s sake! Am I supposed to feel sorry for you?”

“Maybe if you had stayed away from me, this would have never happened.”

“Are fucking serious right now?” she glances over her shoulder, letting her blood instantly come to a boiling point. “You gonna put this on me? This is just as much of your fault as it is mine. You knew that I was having a hard time adjusting, that I missed my friends, that I couldn't even turn to my family, and you took advantage of that. Go fuck yourself, Michael! Take your damn pills and go get high like you do every night to forget you're a fucking loser!”

Maya doesn't give him a chance to respond. She slams the door shut, turns on the light, and closes her eyes for a second as Coco comes out of her room to welcome her. The dog whines, happily wagging her tail, circling around Maya's boots.

Leaning down to pet her dog, she places her bag down on the floor. Coco lowers her ears as Maya holds her head and scratches her head.

“I'm so sorry I yelled, baby. C’mere,” she hugs her neck tight, taking some extra comfort from her pup cuddles and kisses for a moment until they both hear a shy knock on the door.

Hoping he’d just leave, she closes her eyes again and ignores it.

It’s worthless.

He knocks twice again.

And again.

“Maya? Open the door… Please. I’m… I’m sorry. You’re right, I’m a fucking loser. Let me try again… Please, I didn’t mean…”

“What do you say, should we open?” She asks Coco as she tilts her head to the door.

“Maybird. Mayhem. Can you hear me? Maya Papaya?”

It’s crazy to even consider going for round two, but she’s like a moth to a flame, unable to escape the appeal of that alluring heat.

Drawing a fortifying breath, she stands up and hesitantly unlocks the door.

“I thought I told you to stop calling me that.”

“I'm a lost cause. Can I come in?”

“Are you going to behave?”

“I promise.”

She lets him set foot inside to be warmly welcomed by Coco hoisting her front paws up to his chest, wagging her tail, sticking her head out to lick his face.

“Hey, Coco girl. Have you missed me?” He pets her fondly.

“Coco, get down. He doesn't deserve kisses right now,” Maya sighs, gesturing at the dog, and she begrudgingly obeys, getting down and finding her bed in the corner of the living room. “Okay, say what you gotta say? You have one minute.”

“That's not a lot.”

“You're wasting time.”

“Straight up. Alright… I came here to apologize, and I blew it cause you're right I'm a loser. I uh… I thought that by pushing you away was doing you a favor, but I can see now that's not how it works.”

“No, it doesn't,” Maya says firmly.

“Truth is that I don't know what I’m doing… I thought that if I came here and gave you some closure, we could just move on. But I'm looking at you right now, and I don't think I'll be able to do that. It'll be pretty hard to forget about you after everything…”

“Stop trying to sabotage yourself. Live a little. Isn't that what you told me that day when you helped me unpack? Why don't you take that advice for yourself?”

“Because I'm a piece of shit and I don't deserve you.”

“That's not true.”

“It is. You said outside… For the longest time I've been pretending to be something I'm not, that I'm not sure who I am anymore. I thought you fell for that version of me that isn't real. But you didn't, you saw through all my bullshit, and you fell for me anyway… Why?”

“Why? Because I'm probably out of my mind.” She can't help but scoff a little. “I keep falling for all the wrong guys. But believe it or not, you're not the worst I’ve dealt with, Michael. You're not perfect. Nobody is. You say you’re pretending you’re something you’re not… that must be exhausting. I can see it's catching up with you already…”

“It is exhausting.”

“So stop doing that.”

“It's not that simple. I'm not you.”

“The best things in life are hardly simple, hon. It'll hurt like a motherfucker to undo all the damage, but once you make it to the other side, it'll be worth it. I've been there. I’m not perfect, either.”

“I think you're pretty perfect to be honest.”

“I've done plenty of shit that says otherwise.”

“Yeah, but you admit it. You're not afraid of putting it out there, even if people don't like it. That takes guts.”

“Well, I've realized that you can't please everyone all the time.”

“You should have been a shrink, you know that?”

“No, I'm not very patient with people. That's why I work with animals, remember?”

“You've been with me. It's been over a minute, and you haven't thrown me out yet.”

“Cause I'm a sucker. And beyond all reason, I believe everything you've just said.”

“So, what do we do now?”

“You're asking me?”

“Yeah, you're the one with all the insight.”

“Whatever happens now it's up to you, Michael. I’ve already forgiven you. You say you don’t wanna be with me but refuse to leave, and come in here for an encore. What did you expect from me?”

“I guess I keep hoping you’d change your mind about me. It’d be easier to leave if you hated me.”

“Do you want me to lie to you and say that I despise you?”

“No, unless you do.”

“Well, prepare to stay here all night, cause as much as I want to, I'd never hate you. So, it's just a matter of, do you wanna stay or go?”

He takes a deep breath and surrenders, “I… I think I wanna stay. If that’s okay.”

“That’s okay,” she exhales softly, echoing his words.

Neither of them are sure how to go on from there.

They’ve said so much, and yet there is still so much left unsaid. But the fact that he’s stopped letting that inner turmoil of shame and guilt keep him from her is a big step in the right direction. It grounds him, and gives him some peace of mind knowing that she’s looked him in the eye, and said — yes, I know everything about you, and I still want you.

Maya accepts who he is with an open heart, mind, and arms. She doesn’t seem fazed by it because she’s the most powerful force he’s ever encountered. He’s finally willing to give into what was meant to happen all along. He's tired of fighting himself. And if someone like her can find something redeeming about him, maybe he can try to be better for her.

“Can I…” hesitant, he takes a step closer. “Can I kiss you?”

“Only if you want to.”

“I wanna,” he barely mumbles below the sound of a breath. “I shouldn't have pulled away the other night. I understand if you-”

“Shh, just kiss me,” Maya's cuts him out. “Don't overthink it, Berzatto.”

“Okay.”

Drawing a shy smile, his head leans forward, as one of his hands cup her jaw.

“God, forgive me. You're so beautiful, Maybird,” he utters an inch away from her lips before sealing them shut.

This time, he closes his eyes, quiets the voices in his head, the ones that tell him he doesn't deserve her. In between the cracks of the walls he's put up, something else emerges. The relentless desire that comes with the same force of a waterfall. He lets it take the wheel as he savors the thrill that are her plump lips. Tenderly she kisses him back. Links her hands to his neck, begging him to keep kissing her, to consume her, to take her last breath. And he does. He delves deeper. Sends his tongue to soothe that aching that made a home in his chest. He's never felt his heart beat louder than now. It's like he's been dead for years, and she's bringing him alive kiss after kiss after kiss after kiss…

Chapter 6: Life is a bowl of cherries

Like most things in his life, Michael has a tendency to sabotage his relationships right before things start to get serious. He never follows through, a lot of people would agree. Perhaps, it isn't as much of a tendency but a result from his dependency to something else entirely.

The commitment to his work, the pressure to provide for his family has driven him to a very dangerous path. It’s never been more clear as it is now. His eyes are wide open. Forcefully. And for the first time ever, he’s willing to admit he has a problem that he can’t solve on his own.

It’s way past time to face the music, and he’s scared shitless to put that into words. Once the truth comes out, everyone will know how much of a failure he is.

He and Maya still haven't tackled that issue. She's not oblivious to it. She's the first one who saw that something wasn't right. She called him out on it and felt like a dagger laced in shame poked into his heart. Like most addicts, he never thought anyone would notice, he believed he was going so careful. But Maya Silva is not just anyone. She's insightful as she is sharp. She could spot his bullshit from miles away if she wanted to.

Having someone putting that into words was probably one of the hardest truths he had to hear about himself. He didn't realize it was getting out of hand until she verbalized that. They didn't touch it beyond that. While she's not a stranger to challenges, this is out of her depth. As much as it is for him.

While he got rid of a handful of demons, there are still hundreds that haunt him. They make all his fears come true the day after their kiss…

In an attempt to make a better man out of himself for her by breaking the habit, he tries to go just one day without the comfort of reaching to his hidden stash. He manages to go a few hours in the morning without it, but eventually, it becomes harder to go through the day to stay sober. He takes a lower dose, which is an achievement on its own, but it only shows how much he was relying on that.

Michael desperately wants to follow through for once, and makes the executive decision of not using while he’s with her. He’s aware that trading one addiction for another is not the best way to deal with it, but when they're together, it's easy to forget and ignore all those demons making noise in his head. It's when he's alone that he feels that devious hand trying to pull him into the dark well of desperation that his name carved on the walls.

At this moment, there's another different hand, a cold one, holding his own as they walk between rows of Christmas trees while Maya surveys each of them to choose one to bring home.

It’s the first week of December. They’ve easily slipped back to hanging out as much as they used to. And officially, they’ve been out a handful of times since that night he showed up at her door. They've been talking a lot and taking it slow, which feels nice for a change. Sometimes he wishes he could rush through all this part to see what the future holds for them. Thinking about the future in general has always been scary. However, thinking about a future with her gives him just a sliver of hope that things will get better.

Lacing his fingers with hers, he captures the glimpse of a smile as she keeps hauling his ass deeper into the tree farm. They had driven here, an hour out of the city, so she could cut her own tree, cause she read it was better for the environment. There’s no more fight left in him to chase away this overwhelming warmth, and new kind of love that envelops him. If she’d ask him to fly up to Mars, he’d do it.

His other hand is occupied by the end of Coco's leash that walks by his other side. The dog stops as Maya comes to halt to point at the chosen tree.

“This one.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah. This one will fit perfectly in the living room without taking too much space.”

“Alright. Let’s haul it out.”

With the help of a saw they carefully cut the trunk at the base and then, aided by one of the farmers, then sleeve it in a net and load it into the truck.

It's a nice drive with his two favorite girls. Coco sits between Maya's feet and props her head on her thigh while she's pampered with lots of caresses and ear scratches. The dog quickly falls asleep like a baby and doesn't open her eyes until the truck has pulled up on the driveway.

They bring Coco inside, unload the tree, and put it on the stand. As Michael busies himself whipping out something for dinner, Maya brings the decorations she bought earlier and starts hanging them on the tree.

It's a pretty damn picture of the two of them, sitting on the couch, sharing food in front of the fire. He wishes he could frame that moment when she glances at him with that vivid glint in her eye that makes his heart melt.

Maya climbs onto his lap after putting the dishes away. Sitting sideways, her head pillows his shoulder, while his arm curls around her waist. One of her hands holds his bearded jaw, having her fingers softly petting his hairs.

“Thanks for helping me today,” she utters, enjoying his embrace and the cozy decorated room.

“Anytime, Maybird,” his palm slides over her legging-covered thigh.

Maya lifts her head and presses her curved lips sweetly on his cheek.

“We should go on a drive sometime again. It was nice.”

“Yeah, it was. Maybe for New Year's.”

“It's a date,” Michael squeezes her knee as her head leans to the side to capture his eyes.

Maya throws one of those disarming smiles that drives completely out of his mind. He holds the back of her head and seizes the temptation of her lips he’s come to know so well in a matter of days. He revels in the way their mouths fit together like two puzzle pieces.

They lose track of time while their tongues swirl slowly to the same cadence, savoring every second of it as if it was the last. Their arms are loosely locked around the other when Maya swifts her position to straddle his thighs instead. Her body dangerously rezones, sitting over his crotch. His adventurous hands travel to her ass, while the lock of their lips remains strong. He can’t help but pull her hips flush against his as the kiss heats up.

They've never gone further than second base until this point. Though they agreed not to rush into anything, tonight might be the day. He wants to. And so does she. But there's still that part of him that's holding him back from crossing that line with her. Maya's special. He's known her for so long, he wouldn't forgive himself from ever hurting her.

“I thought we were taking it slow.” At the most inconvenient moment, he breaks the kiss and takes his hands away from her when his body demands more of her.

“We’re making out… slowly.”

“Not anymore.”

“Do you have a problem with that?” A sly grin flashes across her face as one of her eyebrows arch.

“Don't look at me like that, Maybird.” He throws his head back on the edge of the couch.

“Like what? I’m not doing anything,” she laughs and leans her face closer to his. “Is it that bad to want you? Don’t you want me?”

“Of course I want you, sweetheart.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

“The problem is that doing this with you feels pretty fucking weird.”

“Why?”

“Because I knew you as a kid. You were practically a baby when we met.”

“That’s the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever said, Bear. First, stop thinking about me as a kid. That's creepy. Second, you aren't much older than me, Mister. And third, do I look like a fucking baby to you now? Or… Do I look like a babe?”

“A babe. Definitely a babe,” he emphasizes, lifting his head and running his tongue across his lips, letting his eyes roam the beautiful curves of her body hugged in a tight t-shirt and a pair of leggings.

“So treat me like a babe. Fuck going slow. Kiss me like you mean it, goddammit! Stake your claim. Grab me. Touch me like the world is about to end and the last thing you wanna do is spend your last dying moments with me.” She demands so passionately, it sends a chill through his body.

He swallows, as his eyes become glossy in lust. Michael grabs her chin to keep her face still. Chasing that desire, he ravages her mouth like he’s never done before. Drinking her in, letting his tongue run wild as his hands go down to grip at the curve of her hips. He unabashedly handles her body to press harder on him, over his growing bulge, that makes her moan into his mouth every time it hits the right spot.

Maya is beyond pleased to have him finally give in to that shared crave that only grows bigger by the second. He grows bigger even quicker once he’s jumped over that line.

Without breaking from his eager kiss, Maya stops moving on his lap and sends her hands to undo the fly of his jeans. Beneath the denim fabric, she can tell how his erection strains, begging to be released by the kindness of her hand. He groans a couple of curses into her mouth when she peels back his underwear.

Maya doesn’t have to look down to know how big he is. Her palm curves around his swollen cock. It fills up both her fists as she stacks one on top of the other. There’s some wetness already that she spreads down to the underside that helps her jerk him off nicely.

Michael loses momentarily his ability to breath and parts from her lips to draw some air. He captures her eyes that hold a darker shade as both of her fists tighten around him. After a moment, he glances at her diligent, handy work that might have him come earlier than he’d want to. Michael hasn’t been touched like this in a long time. At least not with someone he had a connection as deep as this.

“Does it feel good?” Asks Maya with a grin splitting her face, as she shifts on his thighs to straddle just one and rub herself against the toned muscles of his leg.

“So fucking good,” he says under his breath as his head falls back, clutching his fingers to her moving waist. “I… fuck… fuck me… Are you riding my leg?”

“Uh-huh. Do you want me to stop?”

“Hell no. That’s…” his breathing keeps faltering as she picks up the pace. “You getting all wet for me?”

“You have no idea, Bear,” she purrs over his lips.

All his blood flows down to fire consuming his center, letting him dangle from one lousy thread.

“Don't have to hold it. It's okay if you wanna come.”

“It's just… I don't want you to think…”

“Shh. There's nothing to prove. Just close your eyes, and relax. Let me give this to you.”

Following her guidance, his mind clears completely as he closes his eyes and stops clenching every muscle of his body to let her bring him to ecstasy. His hips buck up a few times. And in just a few more pumps, his cock twitches in her hold before covering her hands in the warm spill of his orgasm.

Maya’s hips come to a halt. She tenderly kisses his exposed Adam's apple without letting go of his hardness that still throbs for a moment as the orgasm ebbs. Then she wipes her hands on her leggings while his mouth finds hers. He presses a couple of soft kisses at the corner of her mouth as his breathing recovers.

Michael cradles the back of her head and pulls it down to his shoulder. He plays with her hair, while she listens to his heartbeat as it evens.

“I’m gonna make it up to you,” he says under a breath.

“You don’t gotta.”

“I wanna. Just need a sec.”

“Okay.” She smiles to herself, hugging his chest as he descends from his high.

Once his strength returns, he’s seizing her lips again at a gentle pace. His tongue swims in that endless well of affection she offers freely.

When he's ready, he picks Maya up and carries her to the bedroom to finish what she's started. Clothes are quickly discarded in the dim lit room they both painted together. When he frees her from her leggings and underwear, she's still wet.

He's dumbstruck by the beauty of all her, all bare just for him, laying as the most precious offering.

Smiling bashfully, he props one elbow on the bed, and lies by her side. His fingers gently slide across the surface of her inner thigh. Her skin forms goosebumps beneath his palm as they ascend closer to her groin.

Aiming for that sweet spot between her legs, he locks eyes with her and watches her expression as they land on her folds. Drawing a breath, her chest swells as he tenderly craws circles around her clit. The arousal wrapping around his fingers and the sighted moans he coaxes out of her mouth makes his cock harden again.

“A little harder,” she demands between pants, placing her hand on top of his to show him exactly how hard he can go.

“Like that?”

Maya nods and then holds his bearded jaw with both hands, pulling his face closer to capture his mouth, while his fingers move quicker. She jolts at the sensation of two of them suddenly slipping into her opening. He keeps his thumb steady massaging her clit at the same time. The delicious mixture of movement makes her core thread in a tight knot of pleasure that begs to be untied.

“Michael, baby… I'm almost…” His name has never sounded as good as the way she cries to it the closer she gets to the edge.

“I know, sweetheart. Come for me, beautiful.”

His fingers slip in and out gradually faster until her body is left shuddering by the final impact of that sweet orgasm. The soft fabric of her skin buzzes beneath his palm as she rides that wave of pleasure that takes her to a higher plane. All her muscles seize up for a split second, and then her body becomes jelly.

Inhaling a long breath, Maya turns to the side and curls against him, hugging his torso.

They stay in comfortable silence for a long moment, enjoying the calmness of being wrapped around the other.

Maya kisses his neck softly while his fingers run up and down her spine.

“Did I tell you how beautiful you are like this?” He whispers.

“Yeah, I think you did,” her head tilts up to look at him.

One of his fingers draws her jaw, “I mean, you’ve always been stunning, but I’ve never seen you glow like this. It's like staring into the sun.”

“You're so fucking corny.” She smiles shyly before pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. “You look different, too. More relaxed.”

“The power of orgasm.”

“That must be it. When was the last time you had sex?” She blurts out, and regrets immediately after seeing his eyes slightly widen. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to pry.”

“Sweetheart, you can ask me anything now. I mean, we’re both fucking naked. It can’t get more intimate than this.”

“That’s true.”

“To answer your question… the last time I had sex was a few months ago. It wasn’t anything serious. There was this girl in my building, we used to hang out sometimes. And then… then there was you, and I couldn’t…” he doesn’t have to finish for her to grasp the concept that he couldn’t be with anyone else but her.

“Well… If you’re up for it, we could go all the way.”

“I suppose we could. We’ve come this far… Why stop now, right? It’s the end of the world, after all.”

“Right,” she laughs, pressing her lips to his shoulder.

Feeling more energized, she guides him to lay on his back, stretches his arms above his head while she mounts his hips. Leaning over, she nibbles his bottom lip as her ass rotates over his dick, getting it to become hard-rock again with such little friction.

“Are you clean, you know, STI wise?” she mumbles over his mouth.

“That is the sexiest thing anyone has ever asked me.”

“So, are you?”

“I am. You?”

“Clean and safe, if you’re wondering. That’s sexy to me.”

“Bet it is,” he chuckles, grabbing her ass and pressing her harder against his building erection.

She moves like an enchantress, cursing every inch of his body with her charms to use for her pleasure. He welcomes it. He’s never felt this excited in years, and that’s all she is. Her impulsivity, her passion, her vitality… It's the perfect cocktail. She adds all of her to it, doesn’t leave behind an ounce of anything. It’s all or nothing. That’s why he easily falls in love with her more every day. He wants to drink her all in, absorb every drop until she becomes part of him.

When she sinks onto his cock for the first time, he’s mesmerized by the way she looks at him with nothing but radiant warmth and lust. Her hands brace his chest, as she slowly takes him all the way down. It feels like his world spins on its axis as she experiments with her hips. First, waving gently, then when she’s used to being filled with him, she starts bouncing on top of him.

Nothing ever felt more right than having her like this. Her skin melts beneath his palms, and all he wants to do is explore every corner of her body. She throws her head back and moans at the air as her hips go back to rocking back and forth when they get tired.

Michael slings an arm around her waist, pulls her down against his chest, and gingerly swifts her body around to be on top. His thrusts suddenly come sharp and measured, hitting all the right spots within her tender walls, earning a few good cries mixed with his name. He holds one of her breasts in his palm, as he madly makes love to her. He feels her nails scratching roughly along his back as they both swim closer to the edge. There’s a force taking over his hips that pushes him to his limit as if it was a matter of life or death. It is. At this moment, nothing matters more than chasing that ultimate reward. He makes it his life mission. It consumes everything in the room, makes his whole body tremble in ecstasy as he ascends with her closer to that pinnacle.

He doesn’t stop until she’s left breathless with her body shaking underneath him. And this time, he can hold on for just one more second till she comes apart to let go and have all his seed spilled inside her.

This becomes their most memorable night to date. That room becomes their safe haven to explore and love each other in ways they haven’t done before. They disappear into a daze of sleeping, fucking, and repeat. It becomes primordial and sacred. He finds new ways to worship her body. She finds new ways to reach into his soul, carve herself deeper.

Chapter 7: That's the way the cookie crumbles

Michael is sitting on the couch, absentmindedly surfing between channels on Maya's TV when Coco sprints down the staircase, anxiously whining after hearing a string of loud popping sounds outside. The dog hops onto his lap with her tail between her legs. She lowers her head, tucking it beneath his arm, trying to make herself as small as possible. He glances out the window to see a few kids playing with novelty fireworks across the street.

“Are you scared of fireworks, Coco girl?” He pets her head softly. “Shh, It's okay, baby.”

Maya's out tonight with some of her coworkers she's made friends with, and he's decided to stay with Coco. She doesn't need babysitting, but he likes staying here. To be honest, he's been sleeping at Maya's most nights since they started having sex.

He soothes the dog with lots of cuddles and a couple of treats until the kids go back home and the big scaredy-cat pit bull finally stops trembling.

They both doze off for a while, and he's awakened by the ringtone of his phone when Maya calls him to ask to be picked up. She said she had a few drinks and didn't want to drive. So, he takes Coco with him and drives to a bar that is only a few blocks away from his own apartment.

Maya is more wasted than she sounded on the phone. Her friends are only halfway there. He makes sure that all her friends have someone to give them a ride before taking Maya home. Instead of driving back to Oak Park, he decides to take her to his apartment.

It concerns him to see her in this state. She barely mumbles a word, but he can clearly see that there's something going on that she can't bring herself to say. Michael shouldn't judge. God knows how many times he's drowned his sorrows in a bottle, but this doesn't seem like her at all. She was so excited earlier to go out and now there's nothing but sadness plastered all over her face.

Upon their arrival, she vomits everything she had drank earlier and some more. Michael holds her hair and soothes her back while she leans over the toilet until there's nothing more left in her. He dutifully takes care of Maya and brings her some juice to settle her stomach after getting her to lay down on his bed.

In the morning, he quietly slips out of bed, takes Coco out on a walk and feeds her before Maya even wakes up. By the time they return, Maya is already up. She's taken a shower, and now she's just sitting on the couch, wearing one of his shirts, sulking and eating some crackers she found in the kitchen cabinets.

“Morning, sweetheart.” He kisses the top of her head while Coco goes around the couch, wagging her tail, demanding some attention.

“Hey,” Maya greets back, glancing at him while holding the dog's face and kissing her nose. “Was she good last night?”

“Yeah, she's the best.” Michael sits down on the coffee table and pats the dog's spine as she lays down on the floor. “Did you know she's scared of fireworks?”

“Yeah, she's not a fan.”

Maya tucks a knee to her chest, catching Michael's vexed look that creases his brow as he props his elbows on his knees and tensely links his fingers together.

“What?” She asks dryly.

“I didn't say anything.”

“There's clearly something in your mind. I can tell.”

“Of course you do.”

“C'mon. Out with it, Berzatto. What is it?”

“Nothing. I just… I'm worried about you. You didn't seem like yourself last night.”

“Bear, you don’t have to worry about me. I just took a few more shots than I should have.” She shrugs it off with little importance. “But I'm fine… Well, you know, besides the killing headache and the hangover. I shouldn’t have drank that much.”

“Then, why did you?”

“I don't know… Why does anyone drink at all?” She annoyingly deflects.

“You seemed okay when you called. But when I picked you up… You could barely stand.”

“Look, I'm sorry that I called you. I'll think twice next time.”

“It's not that, sweetheart. I loved that you called… I'm just trying to understand what happened.”

“People drink. Big deal. I went out with some friends and had fun. That's it. Why are you grilling me about this? It's a little hypocritical coming from you, don't you think?”

“I'm not grilling you. I'm trying to figure out what happened. It’s obvious you're trying to hide something.”

“Yeah? Tell that to your stash drawer. You wanna lecture me about drinking? Start explaining why you need that many pills.”

“You went through my drawers?”

“I was looking for a shirt.”

“You know what? It doesn't matter, cause we're not talking about me right now.”

“How convenient. You're the one that has a real problem. I was upset last night and I got wasted. The end. I'm not going to drink tonight or tomorrow or the day after that, and probably it won't happen again, cause I know my limits. Do you know yours?” She jabs sharply, meaner than he's ever heard her.

Michael hangs his head down, shame washing all over him, stares at the floor for a long moment before answering.

“I wasn't trying to start a fight or lecture you. I just wanted to know if there was something bothering you– I guess it was just a matter of time before you found… You're right… I'm… I have a problem. But I don't use when I'm with you… I…”

Maya stands up and faces the window. Looking outside, she comes to realize how tactless that was on her part. Tears slip out of the corner of her eye. She never wanted to confront Michael like this. Let alone let her own insecurities get the best of her.

“I'm sorry. I didn’t mean…” She wipes her tears, and picks up the phone from the table.

She unlocks it and presses play and speaker for him to listen to a voice message she received yesterday. In it, the voice of her sister suggests that Maya should consider not attending Christmas dinner to avoid upsetting their mother like the year before. The message goes on about their-sister-in-law being pregnant, about to give birth around the holidays, and that she doesn’t need that added stress to that night, since they’re the ones hosting this year somewhere in bumfuck, Utah. She babbles for a while about how Maya has made her situation even worse for herself when she decided to move back to Chicago and hide it for months; along with a string of excuses that she's heard many times before.

They've always been subtle with their dismissal, saying it was fine if she had other plans. But that call is the first time they've openly asked her to refrain from attending a family function.

“I got it during dinner and I just… I don’t know, it’s like a switch flipped in my head, and I started throwing back shots to forget… I wasn’t trying to hide it. I just didn’t want to talk about it or think about it right now.” She explains, placing the phone, and then paces the length of the living room a couple of times.

“I get it,” Michael sighs and stands up, running his palm over his beard, putting a stop to her feet.

“I’m sorry that I went through your stuff and that I used that against you… I shouldn’t have. That was a low blow.”

“Guess we're both kinda messed up. I wasn't trying to hide it, either. You already know that I'm fucked up. It's just… We've been in this bubble and I wanted to enjoy that for a little longer before having to deal with all that, y'know?”

“I know,” her hand gently cups his bearded jaw. “When you're ready to talk about it… I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. Bubble or not. I… I've never been happier with anyone, Michael. It might be incredibly naive and idealistic of me to say this, but I feel like if we're honest with each other, there's nothing we can't face.”

“I feel that too, Maybird.”

Michael holds that same hand that's placed over his beard and prints a soft kiss on her palm, tickling her skin.

Then, he releases it and perches his hands on her waist as Maya links her arms around his neck.

“What are you going to do with the whole don't come home for Christmas thing?”

“I don't know. Part of me just wanna show up and ruin their night. But I know if I stay, they'll see that they're just as miserable with or without me. They just need someone to blame for their misfortunes, and I’m it.”

“Hey, maybe you could come have dinner with us like you used to.”

“Christmas at the Berzattos? I'm not sure which one is worse.”

“C'mon, they both suck. It's our first Holiday since we started this, it'd be nice to spend it together, don't you think?”

“I guess… I could think about it.”

[a-song-upon-the-waves-wishclan]

What are the clangen blogs that you like the most? Im asking this since I just discovered Tumblr, and I’m wondering what blogs should I check out first (there’s so many of them)

Also I absolutely adore your blog already! Great art and story. Keep up the work man 👍

Omg! Thank you so much for the compliment! It means a lot.. <33

I tend to hang in the " lasted" section of the clangen tag...trying to upvote and follow other smaller blogs.

@whistleclangen - AMAZING ART! Isnt afrad to add funny little moments in their comic/meme around/or make their characters look a little silly... They are super chill, nice and so freaking talented!! You wont be disappointed.

@direclan - Amazing art! (you are gonna hear that a lot! I adore a lot of these art styles! <3) They update pretty often! And they know their own characters so damn well! I have no idea where they're getting the energy from. You will absolutely fall inlove with mustache-cat! (and their poor med-cat.) @shadow-in-the-blizzard - Horror blog! I love that they have decided to for something with body-horror, mystery and the paranoia that ANYONE can be infected! You will def lose the chara you got attached to. T_T

@the-tale-of-stingrayclan They have such a special art style! I absolutely adore it!! I love it when people arent afraid to give their cats hair, tufts or any other trait that adds character! Keeps a lot of future cats/cats in general from looking the same. (Clangen only has so-so many pelt colours..)

@attempts-of-fawnclan -YOU WILL GET ATTACHED TO THESE CHARACTERS! Their artstyle is super special! I think it is amazing that they seem to be doing all their art in MS Paint??? I could never...

@sapling-clangen - Cute art, friendly, amazing story and super supportive? Like, they followed me and stuff when I pretty much just 'joined' this side of tumblr!?!? The character development is just... chef's kiss! same for that story.

@cutieclangen - Omggggg! Where do I even start? AMAZING ART! Super friendly, nice and just... that story! they arent sad to dip into drama, but you will get so absorbed into every aspect...

@hound-mutt - Their story has just started, but I am already kinda invested.

@yewtreeclangen - Adding someone's other clan! this is equally good to their other story. <3

@turkeypawed - Story has just started, but the owner is pretty chill! I cant wait for their story to continue.

I apologize for any typos of mistakes! My condition gives me quite a bit of writing issues. ^^;

Edit; I have probably forgotten some amazing blogs! I do have a lot of 'faves' and liked ones! I dont think i could add absolutely everyone of them here.

[isfjmel-phleg]

Who is Rachel?

Today, August 7, is my OC Rachel's birthday.

Bio

Rachel Irène Doncath isn't from anywhere. The daughter of Deniol and Sanette Doncath, a Coregean sailor and a Faysmondian former governess, she has lived a more or less migrant life as her family moves from one military assignment to the next. She has an older brother and two younger sisters, and her mother has educated them privately at home. It's been a rather isolated existence, and Rachel has grown into a nervous, timid fourteen-year-old who spends most of her time reading.

When she, her mother, and her sisters come to Faysmond for an extended stay with relatives while her father is at sea and her brother is at the naval academy, they join a household full of family chaos. In an attempt to avoid the upheaval, Rachel accidentally meets a mysterious girl who lives in the castle on the other side of the garden wall. Over the next several months, they meet in secret and develop a close friendship. But it turns out that this girl happens to be Rietta, Queen of Faysmond. And Rachel, not only a commoner but a member of a religious minority discouraged by the Faysmondian government, is a most unsuitable friend for her.

Rachel will find herself caught up in not only her own family drama but the political intrigue surrounding Rietta as she struggles with her own insecurities, trust issues, and how exactly to navigate a friendship with such significant differences.

Why I Love Her

I have a bit of difficulty with Rachel, since in her earliest form she was basically an author insert (silly, embarrssing, etc.). She still bears a lot of similarity to my teenage self, and her family situation mirrors much of my own, but a redesign and some other changes have helped to conceptualize her as something more "inspired by" than "based on." She's become an interesting lens for exploring this fictional world from the perspective of someone who is an outsider in multiple ways and affected by multiple cultures. And yet she is the most "commoner" of all my protagonists. Her family isn't royalty or related to nobility or well-known in any way. She can be down-to-earth and weird at the same time in a way that the others can't. She provides a foil to Rietta, who is outgoing and adventurous and longs for travel but has been trapped in one place most of her life. Rachel, on the other hand, has seen the world but shies back from engaging with it and longs for stability. Instead, she's going to get a friendship that will change her life, some new and more nuanced perspectives on the world and humanity, and hopefully some confidence too. We'll see.

Description

Rachel tended to stand with her shoulders pulled in, clenching one wrist with the other hand, as if trying to correct nature’s mistake of making her a person instead of a piece of folding furniture. Nothing about her was particularly noticeable, except perhaps her hair, a shade too timid to be red. It was absurdly long, usually stabbed through with a pencil and bound back with a ribbon, which did not suit her square jaw. She had a small knob of a nose, a crooked mouth, and noticeably unaligned ears, which she tried to minimize with a habit of ducking her head. This did a disservice to her long-lashed hazel eyes, but their snapping expression was perhaps best left concealed in her household.

Further Info

There is a list of random OC facts for her here. This is a somewhat old list, created when I was still trying to more fully develop the character, and I might need to revisit/rethink it, but you get the idea.

Appearances

Book 1 Chapter One

Book 1 Chapter Two

Book 1 Chapter Two from Rietta's POV

Possibly noncanon scene between Rachel and her sister Addie

Venturing In (later in Book 1)

The Boy with the Botanical Box (still later in Book 1)

[filmtv2022]

Moving Forward: Chapter Four (18+ MDNI)

Previous Chapter Next Chapter (Updated once Posted)

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Reader

Synopsis: Y/N returns home after her fight with Rooster and Hangman. What should have been a cathartic conversation with her father turns into a heartbreaking dose of reality as new information comes to light not only about her history with Jake and Bradley but also about her father's health. The world was shaky before, and now it's crumbling around her.

Warning: language + references to death and character drama + cancer + lots of emotions (grief)

A/N: I hope you guys "enjoy" this one. It has got some heaviness to it, but I think it will set up where I'd like to go with this story very nicely. Also, and as always, I apologize for any and all mistakes.

The frustration dulled to a simmer during the drive home, but the remnants of the tears you shed were still sticky on your cheeks as you drove. The setting sun colored the low-hanging clouds in vibrant hues of purple and pink by the time you pulled into the drive. Mellow light poured out onto the front porch painting the concrete in a peachy hue. Parking your bike in its spot, you wasted no time pushing open the door and making your way inside. Energetic voices floated down the hall, getting louder and more vibrant the closer you got to the kitchen. Your middle brother's resonant voice carried through the house as he told some silly story about his most recent high school adventure. The thud of your bag and boots hitting the floor was lost in a burst of youthful laughter. The high-pitched squeal of your younger siblings tugged at your heart and allowed for a small smile to grace your lips.

Standing in the shadowy hall, you went unnoticed at first. As you came around the corner to the perfect image of your family at the dinner table the weight of everything actually started to lift. Their plates were mostly clean, and now conversation flowed freely. The only voice missing from the fray was your father’s, and by god you missed it. Sitting side-by-side, your parents clung to one another gently. Ice’s strong arm rested on the back of her chair, while your mother reached for his free hand under the table. Catching your approach, he turned his head to look at you. Silent questions and concerns were evident in the furrow of his brows.

The sudden shouting of your name tore you from your moment of nostalgic reflection. Stepping further into the room, you plastered a grin on your face as the youngest of your sisters came screaming across the floor toward you. Her thin arms were outstretched for you to grab her as she continued to repeat your name over and over again. Stooping down, you braced yourself for impact. There’d been a time, not all that long ago when picking her up this way had been impossible. Now it was something you’d never let go of again.

The second her tiny frame was in your arms you stood spinning her around as she held herself to you like a vice. Letting go of an exaggerated groan, you halted your twirls, shifting her weight so that she was on your good hip.

“Y/N, where you go today?” her voice met you as she held your cheeks in her hands.

Looking at her you said, “Where’d I go today?” she shook her head yes before you continued, “I was at work, sweet girl. You know that.” smiling at her you hoped that this sudden change of routine hadn’t caused her too much stress. She’d already been through so much in her short little life.

“Flyin’ planes?” the last word came out more like 'pawaynes' than planes, but it was so endearing you couldn't help, but smile.

“That’s right, and kickin’ Uncle Mav’s butt in the air.”

“Don’t hurt Uncle Mav, Y/N. That’s not nice.” A genuine concern laced her words as she admonished you.

A huff of stilted laughter caught your attention. It wasn’t the same as hearing your father’s laughter before the cancer had taken most of his voice, but it still filled your heart with joy. Glancing over at him, you met his wide smile with your own before turning back to the little girl in your arms to reassure her that Mav was in fact okay.

“Don’t worry, kiddo. I didn’t hurt Uncle Mav, I’d never do that.”

Walking over to the table you sat down in the empty spot that had been your seat since you were a kid. Your sister squirmed on your lap before tearing herself away and returning to her “big girl chair” on the other side of the table. Your chest clenched as you realized just how grown she’d gotten in the last few months. The conversation picked back up as the rest of the family launched into their previous stories. Each one overlapped the other vying for attention.

Sitting just to the right your father, you could feel his eyes on you the entire time, analyzing everything for any sign of how the day actually went. You couldn’t be sure, but if you were a betting woman at least a few text messages had already been sent his way from Mav. Whether or not they said anything about the way the day actually ended or not was the million-dollar question. Pete might not have been in the room for your outburst, but news of it was sure to travel fast. Shit like that like always did.

Noticing that you'd made no motion to grab yourself a plate of food, your mom stood silently and fixed your plate. The off-white porcelain was scratched from years of use, but she refused to get rid of the set. It had been a lovely wedding present from Carole Bradshaw. Setting the heaping pile of food down in front of you, she placed a kiss on the top of your head. Her delicate fingers squeezed your shoulders for just a moment before she returned to her seat.

Silently, you ate some of what she’d offered, but most of it went untouched. The minutes stretched on, but before long it was time for the littles to get ready for bed. Standing from their seats, both of your parents headed off to get the nighttime routine rolling. The school day started bright and early, and with so many in need of a shower or bath before heading to sleep, this part of the day often seemed to stretch on forever in the Kazansky household.

Alone in the kitchen, you listened to the hustle and bustle that was taking place upstairs. As had been the norm for many years, you cleaned up the post-dinner mess. Clearing the table, filling the dishwasher, and getting it started before moving on to taking out the trash. Tying off the black hefty bag, it took a swift yank to free it from the can. You didn’t bother putting back on your shoes as you plodded down the driveway in your socks toward the garbage cans that sat at the end.

The air was lovely, a cool breeze swept through fending off the vicious heat of the day. Taking a deep breath you soaked it all in. The sound of the leaves rustling in the wind, the earthy scent of freshly mowed grass, the woodsy burn of a bonfire crackling in someone else’s backyard… it was all so peaceful. The far-off grumble of an engine startled you back into action. Dropping the bag in the can, you let the lid slam as you turned toward the house.

Back inside, you moved on autopilot to the one safe space that remained after all this time. The office door was open just a crack, and a dim glow filtered out into the hall. Without knocking, you snuck into the room. It was an unspoken rule between you and your father. If the door was open, then it was okay to come inside. The room was filled with the orange light that came through the lampshade in the corner. There was just enough illumination to clearly display the piles of paper that were spread out over the surface of his desk.

Sitting there, Ice held one of the letters in his hand. The blank expression plastered over his features was broken at the sound of the door coming open. Snapping his head to look at you, the concern from earlier returned in full force. The corners of his lips turned down as he took in the sight of you.

You stayed planted by the door. The soft click of his keyboard forced you to look away from him toward the screen. He typed slowly and deliberately, before turning back to look at you as you read.

It’s okay if you’re not all right.

And that was all it took. Tears pooled in your eyes as you struggled to find the right words. When they didn’t come, Ice stood from his chair and closed the space between you. His strong arms closed around your body, holding you close to his chest. Wrapped in his loving warmth, you let go of your composure. Silent sobs shook your shoulders, and your tears stained his sweater, but that didn’t matter. Holding you tighter, he kept you as steady as possible through the waves of emotion. The faint scent of his cologne enveloped you the longer you clung to him.

In time, the tears slowed giving you back control of your lungs and body. Sensing that it was okay to move, he guided you forward to the open chair next to his desk before claiming his own. Silence filled the void between you as Ice waited for you to initiate the conversation. He stayed focused on the way your body curled in on itself as you tucked your feet up into the seat with you. Your shoulders rounded into a hunch as your arms circled your knees, your chin resting on top, while your eyes glued themselves to the shelves behind your father. Your joints didn’t like being forced into this position, but perching yourself this way had become a habit. The hours spent next to him, sitting just like this as he chugged away at paperwork, teaching you bits and pieces had left their mark.

“I can’t fly with them,” you confessed quietly.

The movement of keys could be heard as he typed his reply. Hearing them stop, you tugged your face back to the computer and away from the wall.

The screen read, Are we talking about Bradley or Jake?

“Does it matter?”

Ice leveled his gaze at you, his eyes piercing and steady. The answer in them was obvious. Of course, it mattered.

“I know… I know.” turning away again, this time to stare out the office window, your voice quivered as you continued to speak, “It’s just… having them here… seeing the way they look at me…”

Taking his time as he typed, Ice shifted in his seat as he finished.

Glancing back, you knew what it’d say before you even looked, It’s time to let it go, Y/N.

“And do what? Just forget? Pretend like I don’t wish every day that I was the one- ”

Your voice broke forcing you into silence again. You struggled against the tension in your throat. The words you wanted to say were trapped, none of them felt right, and yet you were bursting at the seams to speak.

That’s not what I mean and you know it… it's not about forgetting, it's about moving forward. You deserve to be happy.

“And how do I do that?”

You have to forgive yourself…

His hands stayed on the keys, but he stopped typing for a moment as if he was thinking hard about what to say next.

And you have to talk to them, Y/N. You can’t run away from them forever. I know you’re hurting, but so are they. And I know you blame yourself for so much, but it’s never going to get easier until you face it. You have to do it, for you and for them.

“I know you're right, but…. Jake… he’s so angry with me, he hates me, and I even can’t blame him. If I were him… I’d want nothing to do with me. His best friend’s in the fucking ground because of me. How do I even begin to apologize for that? It’s not possible” New tears formed as you tried to focus on your breathing, but they didn’t fall, not yet, “And, Bradley? I just… I miss him more than I should and I don’t want to feel that way anymore. It hurts too much.”

Choking on the last of your words, you unfolded from your seat and walked to the bookshelf across the room. The tips of your fingers brushed along the spines of the aging books, their cracked leather was grounding beneath your touch.

The pair of you remained quiet for a while, each lost in thought, but a rough cough from your father stopped you in your tracks. Turning back to face him, the lamp's bright light gleamed off his glasses. In your silence, he’d picked up the letter he’d been looking at earlier. He focused on it intensely for a moment longer before lifting his eyes to meet yours. Studying him, you noticed just how run down he looked as if the weight of the world rested on his shoulders. The look on his face sent your stomach plummeting to the floor. The realization of what must have been on that paper clicked into place with a sickening thump.

At almost a whisper you asked the dreaded question, “It's back, isn’t it?”

Ice simply nodded 'yes' as he sat down the paper.

“Does mom know?”

He nodded 'yes' again.

“What about-”

He cut you off with a shake of his head. This time it was a 'no' and you understood why. He knew you were going to ask about your siblings because last time you'd been the one to help them pick up the pieces after that conversation. It had to happen sooner rather than later, but you also knew that it would be a careful one with each word chosen thoughtfully.

“And Uncle Pete, does he know?” you stared back at him already knowing the answer before he gave it. A broken look of anguish came over your father’s face as he admitted the truth. His wingman was in the dark about this development. There was a reason Mav was back in town on orders from your father, and it wasn’t just because he was a great pilot. He needed to say goodbye… but he just hadn’t figured out how.

“Is there anything they can do? Anything the doctors haven’t tried?”

Another 'no' and the sight of his answer tore at you in a way you could never have imagined. Panic fluttered deep in your body, sending a flush over your skin. Seeing your shoulders hitch, and your eyes glaze over, Ice was out of his chair and to you in an instant. Holding you tightly to him yet again, he hid his face from view to give himself time to collect his own emotions.

Feeling him shudder, you pulled back just enough to look at his face. Tears blurred your vision, but you didn’t need to see him fully as you spoke, “You can’t leave me yet… I can’t do this without you, Dad. I don't wanna-"

And for the first time, he spoke, “I’ll always be with you… no matter where you go.”

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[nonclassyparty]

seasons out of time (c.s.) - part two [teaser]

summary: the new year brings a new job that finally pays enough for you to believe that things might be getting better. in fact, it pays so much that even an idiot would be able to tell that doing anything to jeopardize it is stupid. unfortunately, falling in love with your boss’ young lover is definitely a way of jeopardizing it and also your one mistake out of many.

pairing: choi san x fem. reader

moodboard // playlist // my main masterlist // part one!

TEASER:

(January of now)

You see Choi San in January again, you are just a waitress and he is still Choi San, devastatingly beautiful.

January is appropriately cold and depressing, still the worst month of the year by far as everyone enthusiastically welcomes the new year as if they will actually stick to the resolutions that they made when they said goodbye to the old one.

Wooyoung is one of those people.

"-oh, and I'll definitely be reading more books and advising with my mentor more and going to the gym-" Wooyoung rambles, sat at his usual seat by the counter as he nurses his cup of coffee that he doesn't pay at full price and you halfheartedly listen with an amused grin as you prepare an order for a patron sat at the table by the window.

It's a little bit past noon, the usual flood of college students in the coffee shop has dispersed by now leaving the place almost half empty but still relatively busy. Just enough time for Wooyoung to chat your ear off while Hongjoong yells at the phone in the back.

"Hold that thought for a second." You interrupt his little resolution list that would be lucky enough to still be a thing by next week as you carefully place the cup of coffee on the tray and walk over to serve it.

After placing the cup on the table with a smile to the customer, you quickly shimmy back behind the counter. Wooyoung takes a loud slurp of his coffee, looking at you lazily.

"So, Y/N, do you have any new resolutions?" He asks, head tilted and waiting. 

He always does this, asks stuff about you as if he's trying to get to know you. Little does he know that there's very little to get to know because there's nothing about you that's interesting or worth mentioning.

You open your mouth to respond, spew some bullshit about trying to eat healthier (which is something that you should be doing) and hope he moves on to blab about something else when your eye catches onto a familiar face standing in the middle of Coffee Club.

He's dressed differently now, you can barely remember ever seeing him in jeans and a thick padded jacket, let alone a beanie pulled over his head. 

At first you think it's one of those instances where you see him in someone else, a random customer that walked in and wants a coffee but you attach San's face to him because, even after a year, he still resides somewhere deep inside your very being and you can't reach deep enough to rip him out.

But it's hard to misplace those sharp dark eyes, high cheekbones and full lips that you've become familiar with all too well over the months you've spent working for him.

It's Choi San.

He's standing in the middle of the shop, hands awkwardly hanging at his sides as if they fell out of his pockets on their own and eyes boring into you. You can see his mouth move, open and close a couple of times and maybe if you were close enough, you'd see his chest heave from the deep exhale he lets out.

You'll admit that you've thought about seeing San again numerous times over the past year. You've imagined it being like a scene from a corny romantic comedy or in your case - maybe a family drama that starts with someone's tragic death.

You expected an accidental bump-in where he spills coffee on you or you trip up and he catches you somewhere on a random street. All silly daydreams that you've indulged in when you sometimes couldn't sleep and your thoughts would wander towards him and a world where the two of you didn't meet the way you did.

None of that is real though.

What's real is Choi San standing behind two customers by the counter, fidgeting with the ends of his jacket as he stares at you, his bottom lip wedged between his teeth and you - staring back like you've seen a ghost. Because you have.

It feels so...ordinary and anti-climactic. All the scenarios you've built up in your head make the real thing fall flat. He just walked in. Just like that.

You don't know what he's about to do and you don't know what you are supposed to do, so the moment Choi San takes a step forward and is just an arm away from the shiny counter that you've just finished polishing, you do the one thing you've learned best by now.

You run.

Ah, well, even that, you wished was more dramatic.

In reality, you splutter some excuse to Wooyoung and slink through the backdoor into the kitchen where Hongjoong is still yelling at someone over the phone and lock yourself into the bathroom.

There's no one else working in the coffee shop besides you and Hongjoong (a problem he's been intending to solve for months now but never does, saying that he likes the way things are now despite being spread too thin sometimes) so you will most definitely get an earful for just leaving the front empty like this but what else were you supposed to do?

Stand there and wait for San to do what he came here to do? Talk to him? Take his order and watch him leave?

No way.

What even is he doing here is the better question? Out of the thousand of coffee shops all around Seoul, did he really just wander into the one you work at?

Your gaze wanders to the mirror above the bathroom sink and you clench your teeth, feeling even more pathetic that he saw you like this.

You'll admit another thing, in the numerous daydreams of seeing San again, you imagined yourself differently.

He was supposed to bump into the best version of yourself possible. You were supposed to be more fit, prettier, dressed better, more successful...Just more in every single way possible. Some sort of sick and twisted way to get back at him for not leaving with you, for not choosing you, was making him regret it by doing amazingly in life.

You wished he would be jealous of you and everything you've accomplished by yourself and without him.

And instead he saw...this.

A girl he once used to fuck that now works as a waitress at a coffee shop, whose only friends are a guy who is friends with just about anyone (so you're not even sure if he counts) and a boss that tolerates her at best. 

You're dressed in a dark green turtle neck jumper and a pair of old jeans tucked into your worn-out boots because snow has left the streets filled with slush that you have to avoid each morning on your way to work. Hair pulled back in a ponytail, face free of any make-up because you were far too tired this morning so your sunken cheeks from the weight-loss and lack of proper care as the dark circles under your eyes were on full display.

You looked terrible.

"Fuck." You whisper, rubbing your forehead as your eyes burn. Why was San here? Why the fuck was he here?

You didn't want to wonder too much, you didn't want to care. You've finally started feeling...normal. Somewhat normal.

"Y/N, what the fuck are you doing in the bathroom?! You've left the front empty!" You hear Hongjoong's voice through the door and you quickly scramble to open it.

"S-Sorry, just...needed to use the toilet."

"You can't do shit like that, Y/N!"

"I said I was sorry! Maybe if you hired more people, I'd be able to have normal breaks once in awhile!" You snap back and he levels you with a glare.

"Do you think finding a new worker is easy?" He glowers at you and you refrain yourself from rolling your eyes.

"I wouldn't know and neither would you because you haven't even tried yet! At least post a notice on the window that you're looking for employees or something."

Hongjoong opens his mouth (probably to curse you out) before closing them and taking a deep breath instead. "Get to the front."

You openly roll your eyes at the order and push past him to the front, completely forgotten about the reason why you ran to the back in the first place until you're back behind the counter, eyes coasting over the people enjoying their coffees and desserts over hushed chatter and looking for the guy that broke your heart.

He's not here. San left.

You wonder if he's surprised to see you here, with his heart stuck in his throat as it is for you as he thinks of what he should do or if he came here with a purpose and is disappointed that you ran away.

You don't want to wonder too much because you're still not too sure what you meant to San and opening up that can of worms again would just lead to another spiral into sadness and grief that you barely managed to pull yourself out of the last time.

Choi San came to the coffee shop and left quickly after. You probably won't see him again.

And then he's back the next day.

You don't know what he wants or what he does every time he shows up because the moment you see him approach the glass entrance door, you scurry to the back under some bullshit excuse to Hongjoong and he steps in to take your place.

He always comes in at the same time which is a little after two in the afternoon, you don't know if he orders and if he does, what but you do know that Hongjoong (and Wooyoung to some degree as aloof as he is) are starting to catch on that you're avoiding someone.

"Is that guy, like, stalking you or something?" Hongjoong asks one late afternoon as you dry down the glasses by the counter while Wooyoung lazily does his homework just a few feet away.

You slow down with the kitchen towel and glass in hands, "What guy?"

Hongjoong gives you a look, "Cold brew for out which you run away from like your ass is on fire every time he walks in."

"I don't know what you're talking about." You shake your head, getting back to work and purposely avoiding Wooyoung's curious gaze.

"Is he your ex-boyfriend?" Wooyoung butts in, the thick notebook in front of him already clamped shut so you presume he will not be returning to his studies and will instead focus on bothering you.

"You stay out of it. This is between me and my employee." Hongjoong immediately turns with an accusing finger at Wooyoung who only lets out a pouty and equally whiny 'hyuuuuung' before getting ignored as Hongjoong is turning to you again and repeating Wooyoung's question. "Is he your ex-boyfriend?"

Your lips part as the familiar pang in your chest zaps through you once again before you shake your head. "No."

You're not lying. San was never your boyfriend. You were an 'I don't know' to him, you were nothing.

"Then...if he's bothering you should we, like, do something?" Hongjoong asks, albeit awkwardly as you place the glass down with a frown. "We can call the police or something, report him for harassing you-"

"He's not harassing me." You chuckle.

"He obviously shows up here because of you, who knows what he's planning-"

You snicker softly, the thought seeming ridiculous. "Hongjoong, he's harmless, trust me."

Physically at least, you think to yourself.

Emotionally, not so much considering the number he did on your poor heart but unfortunately, reporting Choi San to the police for something like breaking your heart wasn't an option.

"So you do know him?"

You sigh, getting annoyed by the conversation and them not dropping it by now. "Yeah, I do and he's not dangerous but I just don't want..." Trailing off, you're not even sure what is it that you don't want. "I just...I don't want to talk to him."

Talking is presumptuous on your end, you're not even sure it's what San is after. You don't know what he's after and you're scared to find out. You're embarrassed.

The humiliation of everything that has happened is still fresh in your mind and you just don't want to see him.

Hongjoong sighs with another headshake, "Fine."

He drops the subject.

-

As the days go by, you start recognizing a pattern to San's appearances at Coffee Club. 

He visits on Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays a little after two p.m. and on Thursdays and Saturdays he usually shows up a quarter past seven p.m.

It doesn't match his old schedule at Delirium, you hate how that's something that you notice. You try not to dwell on it too much. Maybe his schedule there is different now.

You still continue to run away to the back every time you see him near the glass door, you don't think he notices. Maybe he thinks you don't work those shifts even though shifts aren't exactly something that exists when it's only Hongjoong and you.

Maybe you're too into your own head and think you're the center of the universe or something to believe that he's coming here for you. Maybe he just really likes the coffee.

It works like that until a fated morning where you're alone in the shop because Hongjoong runs to the post office to pay the bills.

The place is empty as it's barely past seven in the morning and you sway gently to the soft tune coming from the radio as you wipe down the counter and prepare the mugs and cups on stand-by for when the inevitable morning rush begins.

The soft chime of the door causes your head to snap towards the entrance and your heart jumps a beat before inevitably sinking to the deep pits of your stomach as you're caught face to face, eye to eye with none other than Choi San.

Cheeks slightly flushed from the cold and dark eyes not leaving your figure for a single moment as he closes the door behind himself and advances towards the counter.

Your mouth parts and like an idiot, out of habit by now, you take a step back to turn and run. To hide in the back until he leaves, the fact that there's no Hongjoong to take your place completely slipping your mind.

"Are you serious?" You freeze at the sound of his voice. The deep, honey-like sound bouncing off of the walls you're now both enclosed in, reminding you of the time you spent with him in his extravagant yet lonely apartment. You turn to him cautiously and San, standing in the middle of the small empty coffee shop, tilts his head as if testing you, "There's nowhere to run, Y/N, you can't blame it on the rush or your break, there's no-one else here."

With fists clenched by your sides at the way your name falls from his lips so easily, so delectably still, you say; "I'm not running anywhere."

San's face is stoic, unreadable to you, as he stands tall in front of you. He nods, "Okay, then I'll come up to the counter now. Is that alright?"

The fact that he treats you like a scared animal is agitating, something you don't try to hide from him.

"Why wouldn't it be alright?" You ask with teeth almost gritted as your brows furrow. San observes you, mouth parting as if he wants to say something but gives up.

He licks his lips before shrugging and finally walking up to the counter with ease, placing his palms on the surface you just wiped down.

He seems broader, you don't know if it's an illusion created by the thick padded jacket that he's engulfed in but he seems bigger now that he stands so close to you.

You clear your throat, putting your best customers voice on. "What can I get for you?"

San's eyes dim a little at that, for what reason you don't know before he shakes his head, "I don't want to order anything." He whispers, eyes displaying a certain yet familiar sadness that makes you want to curl in on yourself.

You blink up at him, the frustration that's been festering underneath your skin starting to reach the surface. "Then why are you here?"

San doesn't flinch at your words, although you notice his palms pressing down on the counter more firmly. 

"I'm here because...because I want to-" He pauses, eyes running to the side for a split second before they're back on your face and he quietly continues, "Because I'd like to talk with you."

Your eyes burn. "I don't want to talk with you."

With that, you grab the kitchen towel and turn to head for the back again as you avoid looking at him in the eyes at all cost.

"Y/N, please." The desperation is very much obvious in his voice but the final nail in the coffin is the one last small, vulnerable and whispered; "Please."

Tears immediately spring to your eyes as you glare at him, the images of your last encounter flashing through your mind followed by everything else. "You have no right to do this."

San's shoulders slump a little and he gulps harshly, brows furrowing, he whispers; "I know. I know I don't."

"But you're still doing it." You hiss out and he bites his lip, eyes turning glossy as well. You hate that he looks like he's in pain as well. You hate it. You're the one who got hurt, he has no right to be hurt.

You just want to be mad at him.

"I'm..." San trails off, fingers on his left hand tapping the countertop nervously before settling down again, "I'm terribly selfish, yes. But...but please."

You tell San the one thing you never could while you were entangled with him.

"No."

His face crumbles for a split second, he masks it so quickly it's barely noticeable but it's there. He, at least, always keeps his dignity in tact, voice never raising higher than the usual soft, calm tone. "Y/N, please. Please, I'm begging you-"

"No." You repeat shakily, face pinched to stop the tears from dropping, "Please leave."

As if God-sent, in that exact moment the doorbell chimes again as Hongjoong struts inside with a frustrated sigh, carrying a stack if papers in his arms.

"Y/N, you won't believe what they just told me at the-" His words disappear into thin air as he notices the sight of San and you, both turned to him with teary eyes. "Uh..."

Your head turns to San harshly as you level him with a cold gaze despite the teary eyes and already runny nose, hoping he takes the message. Which he does, after a second longer shared eye contact, San's palms slide from the counter as he takes a step back furiously blinking before he turns to the door.

You can hear him murmur a 'good morning' to Hongjoong who, completely lost to what's going on in front of him, just nods in response with mouth hanging open and San is gone. Again.

"Y/N-" Hongjoong starts, turning his attention back to you but your bottom lip is already wobbling from the held in tears and you immediately give him your back as you push through the doors leading to the back of the shop.

That's how January passes.

[agendabymooner]

colour me your colour || toto w. x ofc (7)

Summary: Tilly Marie nearly loses faith in her passion as she refuses to listen to everyone who told her to quit. Everyone but one. And it’s the man she met years ago at a racing event she didn’t want to attend. Who would have thought that her father’s partial ownership of three brands could take her to the zone of Mercedes and meet the love of her life?

Chapter summary: It turns out, Tilly and Toto looked like they were loving each other up constantly - so Tilly's mother, Blanche, had decided to step up to warn her about the wonders and failures of being in a relationship with someone more mature.

Content warning: Age gap relationships, use of explicit language, brief mention of Max Verstappen x OFC (Sylvie), mention of divorce and mental health problems

masterlist

vii. age is just a number and love is just a shame

LOVE ON CAMERA: Future Racing Teams Major Shareholder Tilly Hearth Sends Mixed Signals Alongside Toto Wolff

“Are they the newest power couple of F1 or is this putting their teams to shame?”

AGELESS ROMANCE: FIA Executive’s Daughter Tilly Hearth Cozies Up with Mercedes-AMG Petronas Team Principal Toto Wolff Post Qualifying Interview

“Is this a ploy to get a favourable result for this year’s championship?”

This isn’t the kind of day I’d like to have today. I’m not going to be distracted by some silly gossip outlet’s article.

“I’ve read that. That’s fucked,” Daniel huffs out, peering over my shoulder. Today’s going to be a disaster. I haven’t even seen my family just yet, and now I’m being hounded by gossip sites about my love life. Was I ever thankful that I told my sisters about the “rumours” that’ll soon circulate around the paddocks and F1 world beforehand. 

“Tell me about it,” I mutter, resting my head on the table that I sat on. 

“That should have stayed in the garage or something, I don’t know how they’ve managed to even know it’s Toto,” he says. 

I look up at him and answer, “The Daily Mail caught me arriving in a Mercedes with him yesterday. Remember?”

“They’re fucking fast to capture that,” Daniel shakes his head incredulously, “you were practically running away like you robbed him.” 

“I told him that the British media are too invasive,” I scrunch up my face, “some of them were just here to get some drama to broadcast throughout England and fuck all.”

“Sorry you have to go through that,” he offers a sympathetic smile as he pats my shoulder, “I hope they’ll fuck off for once.”

I gave him a lopsided grin. “Don’t expect too much from them— shouldn’t you be waiting in your driver’s room right now?”

“TILS!” My back nearly broke after I turned my upper half around. A strangled screech escapes my mouth as I stand. Daniel, who’s standing behind me, is accidentally pushed off to the side as four arms wrap around me. I can’t even see Daniel’s reaction but I can hear him introducing himself to a woman. 

I pull away from the embrace as I look between my sisters. Last time I checked, Aimee- our youngest sister- was on her trip to Scotland. What’s she doing here? I look at Stevie, her hair tied neatly, her ponytail coming out of the Mercedes cap that she’s wearing. 

“What’s with the Mercedes get up?” I look at Aimee, who’s wearing a white Mercedes shirt. They’re in the Red Bull hospitality. 

“Hello, too,” I shake my thoughts away as I grin, looking past my sisters and approaching our mother.

“Maman!” I exclaim, hugging her tightly before giving her a once-over. “Still pretty I see.”

“You’re still as hilarious, Tilly,” she rolls her eyes, keeping her arm around my waist. I look at Daniel and he’s standing there with a grin.

“Daniel, you’ve met my mom,” I gesture at my sisters, “these are my sisters, Stevie and Aimee. Steve, Aims, this is Daniel. He’s a driver for Red Bull.” 

Stevie immediately reaches out to shake his hand. She looks more like our grandmother, according to Maman. Nobody could ever mistake her for someone else besides Nan. Her honey-blonde hair and blue eyes are the kind of features that’ll make you feel like you’re in a tropical paradise. 

“Holy shit, you really weren’t joking when you said your sisters are models,” Daniel’s eyes widened as I nodded. “How do you push yourself through it?” 

“It’s— ehh…” Stevie scratches her head and tries to answer his question, “Modeling is kinda fun… if you’ve been doing it for a long time. Like racing.”

Aimee only waves at Daniel, then she’s hiding behind Stevie. Her mother always encourages her to be more… out there yet she disagrees. She can be whatever she wants to be, she’s 14, but she pressures herself to stick to one thing like an adult. She told me once about wanting to model as well and expressed how she wouldn’t do well like Stevie and our other sister would. I don’t know what made her think that; her brown skin and eyes made her glow, like she has her own spotlight. She’ll need to be encouraged more. Or perhaps I should just accommodate her and her camera shyness. She didn’t like being in front of the cameras.

Speaking of our sister. I look around and ask, “Where’s the other one?” 

“Causing ruckus somewhere in the pits,” Stevie jokes. I look at her with my frown becoming more obvious. What is she even doing in the pits? How did she even get in the pits? It was a question never asked yet Stevie has an answer to it. She tells me, “We met Lew in their area and he gave us access to the garages. Just to say hi to a couple people we might know. Now she’s probably running amuck in there—“

“Stupid, stupid, dumb boy,” I hear a hiss nearing us. Daniel peers over Maman’s head.

He gestures in her direction, “I think we found her.”

The middle of the three approaches us as she wraps her arm around me, still seething and her head rests on my chest. I turn to look at Maman and my other sisters, my forehead creasing as if I’m asking for an explanation. They’re just as clueless as I am.

I pat her on the back, “Daniel, this is Sylvie. Sylvie, that’s Daniel— the driver for Red Bull.” 

“Hi,” she nods curtly before her eyes burn with irritation and anger. She gives me a dirty look. “You know— if Father is giving you Red Bull, do you think you can fire that idiot?” 

Daniel’s eyes widen at the comment while Maman hisses at Sylvie, “Sylvie!” 

“What?” Sylvie scowls at our mother, “he’s such a bloody nuisance—ugh!”

“You’re not even telling us who it is, sweetheart,” Daniel pipes up, his face expressing amusement as he continues to goad Sylvie into spilling her feelings. 

“Verstappen! Did you know he’s the reserve driver for Toro Rosso?!” Sylvie stomps her feet like a child as she groans aloud. She’s so bloody dramatic. 

But hearing her answer makes me say, “Ahh. Max.” I can’t say anything else besides those two words; Sylvie despises Max Verstappen since god knows when… maybe at birth. The thing was that they’ve been best friends— like soul mates since birth so it wasn’t exactly hatred that they’ve shared for the past few years. She claims that she sees him all the time and “thinking about his ego gives her a migraine.”

And she quit racing. She enjoyed karting as much as Aimee did, but for some reason, she quit attending the tournaments two years ago. She pushed herself with modeling even more instead of joining Formula Three. My father wasn’t happy with that. Sometimes, I’d like to think that her hatred for Max would soon disappear and that he may be the reason why she quit. I’m not blaming him of course. But there should be a reason why she’s acting like that towards him, right?

“Tilly, please please promise me you’d fire him,” Sylvie whines dramatically, clutching onto my Red Bull jacket as I continue to stare at her. She’s growing taller and she’s beginning to look more like an adult, but her petulant behaviour says otherwise.

“No,” I pushed her off with a sigh, “I can’t do that, lovie.”

“Why not?”

“Because Verstappen is a good driver and if your sister did fire him everyone would chase after him. It would be a shame if Red Bull loses an asset,” Daniel answers for me, making me nod in agreement. 

“And he isn’t in Red Bull, love,” I explain, making her groan aloud. 

“He’s shitty,” Sylvie curses out, crossing her arms with a grumble, “he’s an ugly Neanderthal. He pisses me off to no end. You can be good at driving and be bloody handsome, you know? Clearly he doesn’t—“

I rolled my eyes, now turning to Daniel as my pager went off. Looking down at it, I give Daniel a once over and say, “Garage. Go now.” 

“Fine fine fine,” Daniel rolls his eyes before grinning at my family, “I’ll catch you pretty ladies later, yes? Sylv, maybe you can rant more about him later. If you want, I can pass a message.”

“Dis-lui que je le déteste,” tell him that I hate him. Sylvie tells him with a huff. Daniel gives me a look and I can only tell him, “Don’t worry about it. Go.”

“Get that P1, Daniel,” Maman tells him, making his grin stretch until it reaches both of his ears. 

Daniel winks at her, “I’ll make sure to dedicate my win to you, Mrs. Hearth!” He stalks off. I look at the four of them. 

“I’m going to the Mercedes zone to see Lewis,” I announced with a shrug.

Stevie’s eyes brighten at the announcement and she exclaims, “I’m coming along!” 

“Haven’t you seen him already?” Sylvie snickers—surprisingly happy now— beside me as I chuckle quietly, trying to avoid having to laugh loud. 

“You know,” Aimee begins with an evil smile, “some people might think that you’ve got you know… a crush on Lewis?” 

Stevie, who’s standing between the two, has taken the chance to reach out and pinch their sides. The girls cry out at the pain, leaving me no choice but to hit Stevie at the back of her head as lightly as I could. She pulls away, shooting the both of them a death glare. 

“You three,” I jeered, “if you won’t stop I’m going to leave.” 

It did not take long until Toto found me and met my family. Him finding me somehow made me think that he has some sort of antenna that’ll lead to me. How he manages to either come across me or find me is amazing. Like a mastermind.

It didn’t take my sisters long to catch onto the stories that Lewis clearly wanted to tell about the time spent with Toto. He was rather vocal about his feelings about the three being here — not wanting to save face and be pretentious around his teammate any longer. The interview yesterday was nothing but a way to avoid the fines— Lewis really didn’t want to act all friendly but had to do so. I was only there to make the situation better… somehow. Lewis texted me yesterday about how thankful he was to have me there for the interview.

“Tilly,” I look around and ask myself where the voice came from, only for me to find a 6’5 figure nearing me. Toto Wolff’s rare smile appears as I nod as a greeting. “Nervous?” 

“About my drivers?” I scoff, “No way. Are you?”

“Eh, I’m confident that Lewis and Nico would do a good job,” he answers lightly.

“I know my boys would do alright,” I murmur next to him, “but it seems like the power unit’s been fucking them over. At least Vettel is being fucked over by it.” 

“Well, let’s hope that doesn’t happen this time.” 

“Christian didn’t have an outburst in Austria for nothing,” I joke quietly, making him chuckle under his breath as he refrains from laughing. Oh my god. Handsome.

“Oi, lovebirds,” I sigh as we both turn around to face my siblings, my mother and Lewis. Sylvie continues to tease, “Tils, if you’re done being flustered—“

“I forgot how bloody blunt you are,” I interrupted her with a glare. She cheekily smiles as I look at Toto. I gesture at my family, “My sisters— from left to right are Aimee, Stevie, Sylvie. That’s my Mama. Everyone, this is Toto Wolff. He’s the Team Principal of Mercedes.” 

“Oh look at that,” Toto teases me with a smirk, pointing at their Mercedes hats, “everyone’s a Mercedes fan.” 

I roll my eyes, “They’re bound to run the teams you’ll be competing against, Toto. I wouldn’t be that excited.”

“But at least now I know where their hearts belong,” he continues with a shrug. He looks at my family, reaching out to shake my mother’s outstretched hand. “Pleasure to meet you all.” 

“Likewise,” my mom introduces herself, “Blanche Ford.” 

“Ah, you are the lovely Miss Ford that Tilly’s talking about,” he grins, his charm obviously taking effect on no one but me. “I finally found where your beauty came from, schatz.” 

My face suddenly feels warm as I look down to my feet, watching them as I rock back and forth. 

I didn’t notice Stevie slowly inching toward Lewis but I can hear her say, “Oh she is in love love.” I can’t even debate on anything in front of the person that they think I’m in love with. Am I not allowed to admire a fine specimen such as him? 

And Stevie is literally in love with Lewis! She’s been cracking the worst jokes ever and Lewis is laughing, she’s so proud of herself. She’s telling me, of all people, that I’m in love with the Mercedes team principal whereas she’s literally pining after his driver. 

“Hey Lew,” Sylvie then turns towards Lewis as he gives her a questioning look, “mind if you make Toro Rosso cry a little bit?” 

“Sylvie,” I warn her, “you cannot just say, ‘please make them lose a bit harder’ to someone just because you hate the reserve driver.”

Toto’s forehead creases at my warning. Sylvie ignores the look on his face as she says nonchalantly, “You’re right, I can just smack him in the face if I “accidentally” come across him at their garage.” 

“Stop resorting to violence,” Lewis tells her with a scowl, “there’s other ways to handle a situation than a fight.” Yeah, like he wouldn’t have done that last Monaco race.

My eyes peel away from the conversing people as I look at Toto, “I’m off soon enough. Are you ready?” 

“Ready,” he answers me with a nod. “Will you be there at our after party if we win?”

“I’m not exactly the full on party kind, to be honest,” I tell him, “it gets overwhelming talking to people. It doesn’t sound as bad, though. But it’ll get overwhelming at some point.”

“Fair enough,” he agrees before pausing, then he looks at me once more and asks, “How does dinner sound?” 

My mouth did not even hesitate to answer, “Depends. If either Red Bull or Mercedes get a podium then sure.” As if I was expecting it to happen. Toto felt the same, I think. He didn’t take a second to think about his next move as he continued,

“If we get a first?”

I shrug out, “Well, I’ve got no clue just yet.” 

“I’m looking forward to it then,” he grins. 

Yeah, Mercedes is definitely getting a podium today. 

“You’re thinking again,” my mother says, pulling me back into reality as I shake my head and glance at her. “That must be hurting your head.”

“Maman—“

“I’m joking, ma fille.” 

It’s so hard to lie to someone who practically knows everything about you. Even the dirty laundries I’ve never aired out? Yeah, she knows about them yet she never mentions anything. 

She pays attention to details as she’s used to staying at home as a mother. She told me once that she has enough money that she doesn’t need to work, but she writes under pen names that eventually makes her a lot more than what one should have. Her marriage and divorce clearly never stopped her from pursuing her dream all while she takes care of her three daughters by herself.

Julius Hearth, I rarely call him father now, divorced Maman shortly after Sylvie was born. I was 13 and with enough support from the staff in the household, Maman was able to cope without endangering herself nor anyone. Was I ever thankful for having a chauffeur? Absolutely. If it wasn’t for Jordan, the lovely driver, I wouldn’t have been able to get home earlier so I can spend my time with my sisters. Maman was resting, and I always made sure she’s doing that. 

Now that she’s feeling better, she’s managed to get back up and running. The Mother’s Day celebration in our middle school had her running across the field with bare feet. She certainly loved the game especially when Stevie and I were screaming our ears off. She began taking Stevie to her karting class, which then changed into modeling the moment my sister claimed to work as a model. 

So throughout my life, she could sense the emotions deep inside her daughters. She could tell which career we wanted to have and if she was able to support it. 

She could tell anyone a thing or two about themselves just by looking. So it wasn’t a surprise that she decided to deduce me. 

And since she kindly observed what I’m thinking, I decided that this is the right time to discuss the shitshow that we call Julius Hearth. 

“Father is naming me as the shareholder for his teams,” I’m staring at her as if I’m feeling so solemn about such a matter. “And he’s giving me everything. Did you know that?” 

“Yes and no,” Maman tells me. I’m so glad the girls aren’t here and being watched by our personal guard as they prepare themselves to watch at the grandstand. I didn’t want to expose them to this for now.

Maman continues, “I knew he was going to give up his position in his teams but I didn’t think he’d pass it down to you. Or to your sisters for that matter.” 

“He wants me to hold ownership on those teams and his money, Ma,” I tell her, “all because he wants that promotion at the FIA and to keep Red Bull on a leash.” 

“He only said he trusts you and your sisters enough to do his part,” she sighs, her sympathetic smile can be interpreted as a charming one. “I wish I could do more but… I’ve no place in power.” 

The sad truth is: she’s right. She can only do so much with the company. Even if I’ve taken her in, word would still get out to father. He still doesn’t trust her, despite being the one to cheat and be absent in the household. 

“Toto is a decade older than you,” I must have zoned out again because her voice drowned out while my eyes squinted. But her voice returns the moment she mentions him. 

The cold tone on her voice after saying that has me questioning her. She then continues, “Much like your father is to me, Tilly. He’s an older man.” 

“What does that have to do with anything?” I ask her, actually curious about what she’s insinuating. 

“Just—be careful with him,” she tells me quietly, her voice warning me like she’s been there before. She had been there. She married our father when she was 28 and he was 40. “Older men, no matter the validation they’d give you, would hold their maturity above your own. I’m not saying most men but… be careful when you’re falling in love with someone who’s seen more in the world than you have.

“They tend to hide that away from you.” 

Her advice, while it’s something to remember, has me laughing as if it is actually a joke. But still, a piece of it was etched into my heart and brain. “I’ve only met him,” I shrug and deny, “I don’t think I’d fall for him that fast.”

She rolls her eyes as if she doesn’t believe it. She says, “With how you two looked at the picture? Some are already saying that you’re smitten. Just as he is. I think you should give him a shot.” 

“Oh, Maman,” my eyes narrowed at the comment, “Don’t believe what you see on the internet.” 

“I’m just telling you what I can see,” she giggles quietly, finally standing up and gestures, “Come on, do you really want to miss out on Lewis winning?” 

“I’m supposed to be rooting for Red Bull,” I mutter to myself, standing as I begin to take her to where the girls are.

At first, I wanted to ask myself why she brought up Toto as if I was meant for him. I wanted to ask her what made her think that I’m even willing to try things out just like the others are thinking. 

But everyone is slowly seeing it as much as I am seeing it. For such a short period, he has already decided to do the things he wouldn’t normally do just to reach out to me. In this busy weekend alone, he’s managed to squeeze me into his schedule no matter how stressed he looked before everything. He acts as if he’s much calmer than me when he has a whole team and another to run. 

Maybe my mother is warning me about the price that relationship may come with. Perhaps she’s afraid that the fate I want for myself isn’t something that I’ll get if I continue on with this.

Or she’s just scared that she’ll have to watch that scene again. But instead of her falling apart, it’s me this time. 

Who knows. 

[regretevator-confessions]

i did not know so many people were upset about yuecc being silly?? & responding to stupid asks???

is it really gonna kill you to wait. yuecc is a real person. he makes mistakes. he does things that arent the smartest. but do not raise hell over it. some opinions are better kept to yourself

people that cry & whine over little things are the REASON fandoms become toxic. yes, he should focus on existing characters, giving us important explanations, & work on improving the existing story- but STOP MAKING PEOPLE CHOOSE SIDES OVER IT.

i love the npcs too. I love characters like Bive & yes I feel like she deserves better writing it is not worth forming a grudge against yuecc over. It is not worth starting drama over

The game is also limited by being on roblox, keep in mind. They could actually get in trouble if they included some topics, & if they expanded their lore including certain topics. Also the game is still being updated. It's not done. They are expanding & upgrading the game

im really disappointed in some of the anons here, & its sad that i HAVE to be anonymous on here so i dont get flamed. This is not me saying that you're a bad awful horrible person, this is me saying, as literally quoted on the confession blog's description "use common sense". thank you

.

[precisemuseum]

quick question: what is the Drama CD Vol. 7 track "Amitie's Friends" all about?

This track is really long since it's almost 30 whole minutes, so most of the summary is underneath the cut. It's not comprehensive and some details might be omitted, but it's still a long summary.

EDIT: If you'd like to listen along to the track while reading the summary, you can find an upload of it here.

While practicing Puyo with her classmates, Amitie makes a silly mistake and loses to Lidelle. She's discouraged a bit since she lost to everyone, and Raffina and Klug start poking fun at her. Lidelle tells the two of them that they're being mean and that Amitie has a lot of good points too, but Klug asks "what specifically about her is so wonderful?" Lidelle pauses and says that Amitie is always doing her best and that she's very cheerful. Raffina says that even though Amitie is such a hard worker, she got an F on the last test just like Sig. Amitie gets more upset, so Klug and Raffina agree to stop making fun of her and wrap up practice for the day. Lidelle asks her to cheer up and Amitie tries to, saying that being so cheerful is her only good point after all.

On the way home, Amitie finds a fallen doll by the side of the road. It's a "Living Doll" enemy from Madou Monogatari. She hears a mysterious voice talking to her inside her mind, which turns out to be the doll. It asks her why she was crying, and Amitie explains what happened at school that day and how she's clumsy and not very good at magic. The doll takes pity on her and offers her a gift, as long as she keeps her existence a secret from the rest of her friends. The doll says the "contract is complete", which confuses Amitie, but the doll tells her not to worry about it.

The next day, Amitie plays with Klug and Raffina and she's suddenly gotten better overnight. Klug and Raffina don't understand where her sudden improvement came from, while Sig and Lidelle are impressed by her. They ask how she got so much better in just one night while Klug and Raffina demand a rematch with her. After playing against them once more, Sig notices something sticking out of her pocket and asks about it. Amitie tells him it's nothing then suddenly says she needs to go home.

Everyone's left wondering about what's up with Amitie, when Accord and Popoi appear and ask the students what they're all doing. Klug says that she suddenly got better at Puyo and asks how such a thing could be possible. Accord has an idea of what might have happened, but tells her students not to worry about it and sends them all home. Popoi asks if they should investigate, but Accord says that the students should be able to solve this themselves and she'll only step in as needed.

At home, Amitie thanks the doll for everything and asks if she got better because of the doll. It tells her that this is Amitie's true power and all it did was help her out a little bit. Amitie thinks that it's nice to surprise everyone, but the doll says that it must be nice they aren't saying such mean things to her anymore. Amitie isn't so sure about that since it's true that she is a little clumsy and that isn't a bad thing, but the doll tells her she mustn't forgive her friends. The doll says that its her only true friend that will be with her forever.

The next day, the students are practicing again, but Amitie's heart isn't in it even when she manages to cast a Bayoen. Everyone says that Amitie got even stronger but she laughs it off and says that she's just tapped into her true potential. When Sig gets her attention, she asks if he's suspicious of her when he hadn't even said anything. Though Klug and Raffina are both suspicious of her and demand an explanation. The doll speaks to her in her mind and tells her to tell them what she really thinks. She says that everyone always teases her and that she realized that the only person she can rely on is herself, and that her classmates must all be making fun of her deep down in their hearts. Lidelle protests and says no, but Amitie suddenly realizes how mean she was being and gets a sudden headache. While her head is hurting, the doll falls out of her pocket and Sig and Lidelle notice it. She pushes both of them out of the way and tells them not to touch it, because the doll is the only friend she has that truly understands her. Klug and Raffina try to get her to calm down and get her to hand over the doll, but she refuses and says that if they want it, they have to Puyo battle her for it--but she doubts that they can win. Amitie runs off and the doll is proud of her for telling them what she really thinks. Amitie isn't sure how to feel, but her head is pounding and her heart aches because of the things she just said.

At school, Raffina, Klug, Sig, and Lidelle are moping about Amitie's outburst.

Lidelle: Ami… Ami… (Crying) Raffina: Lidelle won't stop crying, Sig: (Siiiigh)… Raffina: And Sig's just spacing out… (Sigh). Ugh! Damn it! I'm so annoyed! What is wrong with us! Lidelle: I-if only Ami was here… Raffina: It's all because of that Amitie that we're all worked up like this! Lidelle: The usual Ami is always smiling and energetic, and even if you're sad, she can brighten up your day… I-it's only thanks to Ami that someone as shy and withdrawn as me became friends with you and can have fun with all of you every day…!

Raffina and Klug are both embarrassed to admit that, but Sig decides to go and find Amitie. Klug tries to stop him since she's super strong right now, but Sig wants to go find her regardless since that doll is very suspicious and dangerous. He's sure that Amitie regrets what she said and is in a lot of pain. Lidelle agrees with him, saying that sitting there and moping won't help Amitie, and Sig leads the students to go find Amitie.

Meanwhile, Amitie feels very spaced out but she feels a bit better. She thanks the doll for worrying about her so much. Raffina suddenly storms in and Klug tells her to let go of the doll and Lidelle says it might be dangerous. The doll says that they must want to take it away because they're jealous of her, and Raffina, Sig, and Lidelle tell Amitie not to listen anything the doll is saying. Amitie starts a Puyo battle and the other students try to work together to counter her.

Raffina tells her that it's true that she says a lot of mean things to her, but that doesn't mean she should only rely on the doll, and that she's lonely without Amitie. Amitie is surprised, and Raffina explains that Amitie is her friend and despite everything, she always has fun with her, so she wants her to come back and be friends with them. Klug also tells her, although embarrassed, that she makes him laugh and that she has a lot of amazing points too: she's determined, energetic, and that she's the glue that holds them together as a friend group. Lidelle says that they've all decided to be honest with her about how much they appreciate her and Sig chimes in to say that he was worried about Amitie. The doll says that all of them are just lying to her, but Raffina and Klug say that why would they be so embarrassed if they're lying. Lidelle says she loves Amitie and Sig continues to call out to her. Amidst all of this, Amitie stacks her Puyo too high and ends up buried underneath a pile of Puyo.

The group dig her out of the pile and ask if she's okay. Lidelle asks if it's okay if they become friends again and Amitie says of course, but she's sorry for everything she said while she had the doll. Accord appears and picks up the doll and explains that this doll takes advantage of people's weaknesses so that it can control their power. The doll is annoyed and says that it just had a bit more to go, but Accord says that it'll be safely stored away in the museum so that it can't hurt anyone anymore.

Raffina tells Amitie to cheer up and to stop making such a sad face since everyone went through all this trouble to save her. Lidelle tells her that she shouldn't apologize to them, just thank them for helping her. Amitie thanks all of them and Sig is happy to see her smile again. She's happy to have heard such nice things from everyone. Klug plays it off and says that they had to, but Lidelle reminds him that they're going to be honest with each other from this day onward. Raffina says she has no intentions of saying what she said again, so Amitie had better have memorized it. Amitie playfully begs Raffina to say it again, but Raffina says she'll only say it again if Amitie gives her some jewelry. The group of students all laugh together while Accord watches over them and says she's very happy for them.

[its-a-me-mango]

yo mango, i found this in twitter(x). a creator in twitter sented this.

Oh boy, yes this is the response I was referring to in my other post, and I have some things to say about it.

TL;DR: Clarification is nice but it shouldn't be up to the employees to apologise for something that upper management should've taken accountability for anyway. I'm not accepting everything as "fixed" until Celeste says anything else.

Obligatory "we don't know everything so don't jump to conclusions!!!" disclaimer (personally I love jumping to conclusions I love drama lol)

(also my stance on what I'm doing with this account is at the bottom of it so go take a look if you wanna know what I'm gonna do)

Ok first off, let's start positive, good to have some accountability and a bit of clarification on what's happened, considering I honestly thought GLITCH was just gonna keep quiet and hope for it to brush over, having the manager tell their side of the story is a good thing.

That's all the positives I have towards this apology because the rest are all negative.

For starters, why is the manager taking full accountability for this, while yes they made the decision, the higher ups should be taking accountability, at the end of the day Jasmine is an employee of GLITCH. Normally when something happens within a company, the company itself will put out a statement taking accountability for the actions of their staff. This hasn't happened yet, it's not Jasmine's full responsibility for this, there should be recognition from the company of their mistake.

I get if they're taking a while to make a response, but it's not hard to put out a statement saying "hey, we fucked up, sorry". It would be miles better than having an employee put it out IN THEIR FAN DISCORD SERVER OF ALL PLACES, thank got it got reposted because none of us would know others.

Furthermore, what is the main message from this, the main reason for this happening? "Oops I forgot". That's such a shitty excuse, especially for a manager. I completely understand getting overworked as hell, from what I've seen Jasmine is also the manager for a lot of other things at GLITCH, and if GLITCH's Glassdoor reviews are anything to go by, overworking employees seems to be their biggest flaw.

Something like this slipping their mind would be fair and understandable under those circumstances, but that's what upper management is for, it's up to them to make sure people do what they're employed to do, that includes making sure the appropriate messages are sent out, especially for big changes like this. Of course no one likes to have a boss that questions everything you do, but having someone check that all the appropriate messages are sent out is pretty damn important for running a company.

This is ultimately a show of poor management on GLITCH's behalf, had they communicated better not just with Celeste but also with each other, this entire situation would've been avoided.

I don't think this is some catastrophic downfall that can never be resolved, it actually can be resolved quite easily. All it involves is an admission of negligence on GLITCH's side and a proper apology to be sent and accepted by Celeste. Obviously I'm not gonna go demanding such things be made public but treating this like GLITCH's downfall is just kinda silly, this can be fixed.

Yes this is bad, and you should feel upset/angry about this all happening, seeing voice actors being treated poorly and "forgotten" about sucks and doesn't reflect well on GLITCH at all, if you don't want to support GLITCH right now that's completely reasonable, but this isn't worth wishing the companies downfall over. Advocate for change, not carnage.

There is also the possibility that this whole "apology" is bullshit. More comments from SMG2's now former VA have come out about this apology.

If this is all true, then that's just as bad on GLITCH's side. Ultimately we won't know the entire story until Celeste makes any other comment, however given how taxing this has all been on her, it's understandable if she doesn't say anything now, or ever to be honest.

My love and support goes out to Celeste during this time. I hope she and GLITCH can come to some kind of agreement that allows everyone to move on.

Anyway, so about me now, haiiii

I'm likely gonna mostly hault making SMG4 art for a while due to this, I love this series and I don't like to see this all happen to it, but I care more about treating voice actors fairly and making sure they're given the respect they deserve, if that involves stopping my support for GLITCH for now then so be it. I'm hoping this gets resolved, if that does happen i'll go back to normal, if not thennnnn I'll deal with that when it happens.

I'm still happy to interact with people in this community still, there's a few ideas and pieces I want to make for other people still, things like AU arts and DTIYS's, so I'll be doing that, but as for new SMG4 art and memes, not right now. (lets face if the SMG4 community on Tumblr is so far removed from everyone else it's basically our own series out here lmao)

I'll still draw Mango don't worry, he's basically my persona so I can detach him from SMG4 for now, my silly lil guy isn't going anywhere.

I understand that a lot of people are upset by this and are trying to block it out and carry on as normal. While I understand why most of you are taking that stance, I know a lot of you are teens and SMG4 is a source of comfort for a large chunk of you, please don't just ignore all this happening. I don't even care if you take an inconclusive stance on this, just please don't block it out entirely and pretend it's not happening, that's just not fair on Celeste.

I'll be doing my best to keep up with this as much as possible. I know I've come across as overly critical during all this, but I don't like seeing people act like GLITCH has done nothing wrong and never can. It's ok if a company you like has done something shitty, they do that all the time, but its not ok to let them get away with it and pretend it never happened, that's just covering for their shitty actions. I'm not going to cover for GLITCH's shitty actions which is why I'm speaking up about it and will continue to do so until some kind of resolution is reached.

Anyway I've talked enough, if you're reading haii hello thanks for reading the whole thing , if you skimmed to the bottom I'm shooting you with lasers (/j). We'll see what comes of all this but until then take care. <3

[brawlina]

Step aside I have a lot of Colette fanfic writer headcannons and you WILL hear about them.

Colette Fanfiction Headcannons

Colette was a fanfiction writer long before she joined the Brawl Stars Fandom. So it was easy for her to transition into writing about brawlers.

Technically writing about Brawl Stars in universe is RPF (real person fiction), but Colette has long overcome the initial hesitation in writing about that.

Her writing style is quite nice, but is often littered with spelling mistakes and formatting issues. She tends to fix them after she's already published the chapter. She could stop and make sure that everything is legible before she publishes, but she just gets too excited and wants to publish things as soon as she's written it out.

She did not stop writing fanfiction when she became a brawler herself. Are you crazy? Now she has ALL the material she needs to make ALL the stories she wants!

She finds its hilarious that all of her self-insert Brawl Stars Fics are technically true, but also that she herself is a character there! Who would've thunk?

Colette likes gifting her friends fanfics! Sometimes it's for special occasions, but she just likes to do it for fun.

While her online friends are always delighted to receive such gifts, her irl brawler friends can have all sorts of mixed emotions about it. Most think it's kind of creepy, but others find it silly or weirdly flattering.

Some brawlers have asked her to write fanfiction for them though. She won't name names but they're usually the ones who have a massive ego that needs satiated or someone who just wants to be with the one.

Some of Colette's online friends and fans have suspected that she and the brawler are the same person, but she's never confirmed it. She WANTS to confirm it but alas contracts prevent her from doing so.

Colette can and will ramble about the Fandom specific tropes and various dramas happening in the fanfic side of the Fandom. Unfortunately, Edgar is often the frequent target of these tirades.

She suspects that some of the people on the forums are also brawlers and is trying to find out who they are. She has dedicated half of the gift shops corkboard to this cause.

Colette can and will read anything. She's been online long enough that nothing really phases her and that she doesn't mind having to dig for scraps of her favorite characters.

There were MANY Reader x Piper first on her account. Something that Rico wasn't too pleased by when he found out.

Colette would title all of her fics after song lyrics

She has a stash of fanfictions that she knows will do 100+ psychic damage to any of the brawlers in it if they read it. Is she planning to use this? It would probably depend on her mood.

One of the rare few breed who actually gets fanfics done. Oneshots and multichapter alike.

She probably carries at least a 1/4th of all the fanfics in the Brawl Stars fandomon her own

Management actually has to be careful around her lest she accidentally spill a surprise before it's officially announced.

[queenimmadolla]

Ok but question about my favourite family in the whole world. How would Eddie and the reader react if one day Penny comes back home from kindergartens all happy saying that she has "boyfriend"? Because while I can see the reader acting all interesting and say "He shared his food with you? Oh it must be true love then", I can totally see Eddie acting all silly (like Penny would describe him) and by being the perfect drama queen he always is would say things like "but I thought I was your boyfriend" and things like that.

I'm so curious to know what you think of this and what you think their reaction would be 😅❤️

OMG, okay so Penny might as well punch him in the balls because Eddie would fall to his KNEES. That is his baby girl. Reader is like whatevs cause penny bullies boys into liking her back and she’d rather her go through that phase while she’s this young as opposed to upper elementary levels. Plus, she enjoys the joy Penny seems to have about talking about it, Reader ain’t looking forward to having to comfort her daughter in the future when she experiences heartbreak (cause her hearts gonna break, too) so she’ll be happy to entertain all the innocent puppy love, it goes a lil sumn like dis

  “Daddy, what are you doin?” She’d laugh as she watched him, splayed face down on the livingroom floor.

  He’d groan and writhe and she’d kneel down to rub his back and sooth him even though she was completely aware her daddy was being silly again, her little mouth stretched into the biggest smile.

  Eddie would let out the most dramatic of gasps when he’d stop his bit to peek his eye open and catch sight of it, “You’re smiling? You just ended my world and you’re smiling?!”

  “No!” Penny laughed out, “I din’t end it!”

  “You did,” Eddie was quick, arms reaching out to snatch her waist and yank her down with him while your mini-me shrieked with joy, “And for that, my offspring, you must pay.”

  “No, no, no!” She grunted out between giggles, trying to squirm her way out of Eddie’s grasp since she knew what was coming.

  “Oh, yes. Here comes. . . MR. CLAW!” He bellowed out, voice deepened for effect and Penny’s shrieks heightened in pitch as Eddie’s hand stiffened to resemble a claw before he began his tickle assault on her tummy and sides where she was most ticklish (actually, she was most ticklish on her armpits but that made her pee, Eddie wouldn’t be making that mistake again).

  Penny was practically convulsing, little limbs contorting to try and escape her ‘punishment’ as she laughed and screamed.

  You couldn’t help but laugh along with them, and your laugh intensified when baby Wayne joined in, his laugh so obviously fake and forced, from his high chair while you made him and Penny a snack to keep them satisfied until dinner was ready.

  Penny had told you all about her little ‘boyfriend’ when you’d picked her up from school. You’d indulged her, overly enthused in your replies (‘Oh, he let you color with him and he got you a stuffed bear?’ She’d demanded one, ‘I guess we better go pick something out for him, too, yeah?) but you were more amused than anything. Your daughter’s favor was fleeting for the most part, you were positive she liked the idea of having a boyfriend more than actually having some little boy dote on her because this boyfriend was her fifth so far into the school year and she was only three months in.

  And you’d been informed by her teacher that Penny would literally chase them around the playground and classroom until they were forced to agree to be her boyfriend (but she’d shy away from one boy in particular, usually refusing to interact with him when he’d approach her, interesting).

  Then a week later you got to hear about how Stanley ‘pickeded his nose, mom! And then—and then ate it!’, so she told him he wasn’t her boyfriend anymore. 

  You were sure this one would be no different and you also had a sneaking suspicion that Eddie’s reaction also played a part in whether Penny would have a ‘boyfriend’ that week or not.

  “You gonna break up with him?” Eddie asked, smirking as he continued to tickle her.

  “No!” Penny refused, face darkening with how hard she was laughing.

  “Break up with him,” Eddie goaded, his tickle attack seizing to allow her to catch her breath. Penny was practically heaving, her hair a mess from all her wiggling and the torturous tickles she’d endured, yet she still proved herself to be a Munson.

  “No, daddy.” She whispered out in defiance, mouth breaking into another smile as she tensed her body to prepare for an incoming wave of tickles. 

  Instead, Eddie cradled her in his lap and pressed his forehead to her sweaty one with a pout, “Thought you were gonna grow old with me, little bitty pretty one?”

  “But yer already old, daddy.” 

  The pain on Eddie’s face looked authentic and though you were sure she didn’t mean it as an insult, it hurt you too.

  Eddie rolled onto his side, again taking Penny with him as he curled into the fetal position. 

  “That’s it. You’ve gone and done it. You’re not allowed to date until you’re married.”

[kindalikerackham]

The Black Sails Drama Highlights™️

Like, what the fuck happened over there?

Lucky for you, I was there on the ground floor (even sent in some propaganda that elicited a truly baffling response from the poll runner) because I'm a nut for goofy little tumblr polls and a nut for best little lesser-known-tv-show Black Sails.

Alright, so. @/pirate-battle (from here on out referred to as OP -- the Original Pollster) was running, as one might expect, a pirate bracket. At first glance, it wasn't explicitly presented what the criteria were, so people voted on their preference, often moving along pirate icons (Hook from Muppet Treasure Island)/characters from active fandoms (TAZ), etc etc you know the drill. (Although they later clarified they were looking for favorites, not the "best pirate.")

OP's first mistake, I think, was the assumption that a silly goofy little tumblr competition about characters archetypically ungovernable would remain silly goofy and with minimal strong language.

But this wouldn't become visible until they made their second mistake, creating a first-round poll between James 'brutually murdered a crewmate in the first episode solely to maintain power for his revenge-quest against England' Flint of Black Sails vs Stede 'notable used tissue' Bonnet of OFMD. They did recognize some of the coming danger even with that post, tagging "#I predict slaughter in the tags"

O Apollo, strike down these children with prophecies that bite them in the a--

Anyway. Predictably, there was slaughter in the tags. Violent language rather typical of the tumblr that I came from (the tumblr of the early 2010s), but seemed to be utterly shocking to some OFMD fans.

Exposition time: It should be noted here that there exists at least two-ish different kinds of users of tags. Those that use them to scream personal thoughts into the void and/or whispers into their mutuals' ears, and those sneaky little fools who will peruse everyone's personal little screams/thoughts to their internet buddies. And original posters are relegated to suffer the yelling/whispers without choice.

So that slaughter, in the tags, those rivers of blood through the whispers of a fervent fanbase of a violent and freeing queer show, did reverberate around other users, regardless of etiquette.

And for some of those very sweet very uwu our flag means gay fans, that was.. very scary. (Must be all those spooky theatrics with the smoke and mirrors).

(....Idk??? Maybe I'm just battle-hardened from superwholock, but saying a tag a la "AHHHHHH I'm going to rip something's head off my BOY BETTER WIN" just doesn't really phase me?? Nor does "#I'm literally going to k/m/s if x wins." Overkill? Yeahhh... But this is tumblr. We invented overkill for the media we like. And again, this was in someone's tags.)

Moving on, as tags of that violent nature starting pulling through, and people started vigorously defending black sails as a franchise over ofmd, myself and others sent in some propaganda of my own, urging OFMD fans to really understand that Black Sails is mostly incomparable to OFMD and... Black Sails is just kinda better. Cuts deeper. Genre difference at work here.

Soapbox Side Note: Black Sails can actually be kind of game changing, especially for a show that came out in 2014. There's so much to say about it but it's hard to talk about without spoiling. I might add a link to a good 'things to know' post if you're looking to get into it.

Anyway. OP was starting to lose it.

Like, I really just don't think they had mentally prepared for how truly feral Black Sails folks were/are about that show, and how they were willing to get all HRRRRRRR CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP about it.

Additionally... OP was white, and they were super duper unprepared to engage with any of the discourse about racism that these shows dig up (They're about pirates, and a lot of pirates engaged in the slave trade. Or had freed slaves on their crew. Some even owned slaves themselves. It was complicated and pirates are typically a white fantasy vehicle and anyway I'm getting off-track--)

OP started to really fan the flames with more and more visibly emotional responses

They said "it's not a competition" between the two shows, despite it... being a literal competition...

They called people out for "gatekeeping," but didn't really define what it meant in the context of saying one gay pirate show was way better than the other.

They told Black Sails fans not to express negative feelings towards OFMD on the internet (because good representation is the god us internet queers pray to, and we wouldn't want some network exec to say "oh those mean people on the internet, better not renew the popular pirate romcom" obvi)

After some more of this, they then threatened to overturn the results of the poll entirely and remove Flint from the poll wholesale, despite the fact that he had won. (Which is hilarious if you know anything about Flint in Black Sails. He's literally That Guy That Makes People Break Democracy Attempting To Unseat Him).

Finally, after a day of trying to ignore the fact that they'd become a meme within black sails circles (one post even screenshotted then with "new copypasta just dropped" yikes), they threw in the towel. And bless them, I do think they needed the break. They were kind of going through it.

In conclusion,

The Black Sails fans pulled what I might even daresay to be,, , a fuckery "of censorship and fear",, over OFMD fans and some poor unprepared poll runner who had no skin in the game, while using only strong language and some mild mean-spirited memes (95% of which in their own tags and posts).