#with an uneven number. but thats whats happening.

[lokh]

WHY IS THERE AN EXTRA STITCH

[battleangel]

Do We Even Give A Damn?

US Supreme Court issued two key rulings within the past week: •Houselessnesss is now illegal •US Presidents have been granted immunity.

Houselessness Per Google: “Last week, the Supreme Court issued its opinion in Grants Pass v. Johnson, which makes it easier for communities nationwide to fine, ticket or arrest people living unsheltered, even when there is no adequate shelter available.”

They have criminalized being houseless even when there are no other options available.

Immunity •Granted US Presidents immunity — as long as the President states that s/he was acting in an official capacity regardless of crime(s) committed, they will be granted immunity.

Due to a literal average 3 second attention span — 3 seconds! — and instant collective amnesia — within a day, dead Boeing whisteblowers & Super Bowl Chiefs Parade shooting were instantaneously forgotten by the public who had already moved on literally by the very next day.

Theres always another show to stream, social media feed to scroll, youtube video to watch, Discord server to respond to.

They are completely emboldened now and are gearing up for an end game.

You do know who they is — right?

From Chicago Sun Times: “As disturbing as this agenda is, the most alarming and repellent policy proposal contained within Project 2025 is the restructuring of the federal government, eliminating the kind of public servants who stopped Trump from completely disassembling the Department of Veterans Affairs, overcame his resistance to expelling Russian spies, deterred him from shooting racial justice protesters, derailed his plan to deploy the military against migrants and kick undocumented children out of schools and deflected his suggestion to drop nuclear bombs into the eyes of hurricanes.

The Heritage Foundation, which produced Project 2025, grew out of the mid-1970s movement to protect racially segregated schools. The first battle it waged was against a school district’s adoption of multicultural textbooks — “n- - - - er books,” as some opponents called them.’'

Why is Orbán their model? Because he showed them how to use elections to undermine democracy and ensure perpetual power for his team,” historian Nancy McClean said. “How? Orbán purged the civil service and refilled it with obedient loyalists. He got the Constitution altered. He completely dominates. And this is what Heritage wants to see happen in the United States.”

Hitler did it too — look up Night of The Long Knives.

Knives Out.

I want you to know He's not coming back Look into my eyes I'm not coming back

So knives out Catch the mouse Don't look down Shove it in your mouth

If you'd been a dog They would've drowned you at birth Look into my eyes It's the only way you'll know I'm telling the truth

So knives out Cook him up Squash his head Put him in the pot

I want you to know He's not coming back He's bloated and frozen Still there's no point in letting it go to waste

So knives out Catch the mouse Squash his head Put him in the pot

Thom Yorke: “It’s partly the idea of the businessman walking out on his wife and kids and never coming back. It’s also the thousand yard stare when you look at someone close to you and you know they’re gonna die. It’s like a shadow over them, or the way they look straight through you. The shine goes out of their eyes.”

Its like a shadow over them.

The shine goes out of their eyes.

Project 2025. Modern Power Project.

The Democrats naturally have their own Project 2025 — Modern Power Project.

You dont actually think the two parties are different. Do you?

You didnt actually waste your time watching the debate. Did you?

Why is Netanyahu addressing Congress on July 11th after murdering 50k Palestinians since October 7th when 1,700 Israeli civilians have been killed since October 7th?

Dont those numbers seem uneven to you?

Thats not a war or a two-sided conflict — its a genocide that the US is funding to the tune of $4 billion a year in aid to Israel and supplying the weapons & bombs for via Boeing, Raytheon, Northrup Grumman & local mid-western weapons manufacturers.

Netanyahu gets the bully pulpit & gets to address Congress.

What does a murdered 6 year old Palestinian child, Hind Rajab, get?

International investigation into her murder confirms she was killed in “deliberate” Israeli fire.

Still, the US refuses to condemn Israel, refuses to stop funding the genocide and arming the IDF in their merciless butchering of my Palestinian brothers and sisters.

Whats going on?

62 House Democrats voted no last week to recognize the current civilian death toll in Palestine.

Why do you think that is?

As we move into the 4th of July “celebration” of a genocidal white supremacist police state based off of brutalism, slavery, militarism, racism, patrimony, patriarchy, misogyny, transphobia, homophobia, the ethnic cleansing of indigenous peoples, the powers that be want you to forget about the genocide in Palestine that YOU are funding with YOUR taxpayer dollars if you work a W-2 job or if you made more than $400 last year via freelancing or entrepreneurship.

That is the vast majority of adult Americans DIRECTLY funding the genocide in Palestine that is literally being livestreamed in real time on our phones on social media.

Enjoy your fucking fireworks.

Democrats Project 2025: “There’s also the awkwardness that surrounds any trend that serves to increase the identification between a private nonprofit and a sitting government — something that may be a boon to a particular think tank that wants to look influential, but can be uncomfortable for those who think about the policy ecosystem writ large.”

“My concern with ‘left’ or ‘right’ talent banks is that they would fuel the idea/narrative that the state is being captured,” said Enrique Mendizabal, whose On Think Tanks (https://onthinktanks.org/) studies think tanks themselves."

Were being set up.

And they know people are too distracted scrolling, streaming, gaming, messaging — theyre too numb — theyre too disaffected — non existent attention spans — instant collective amnesia — to give a fucking damn.

The knives are out.

As Michael Jackson pointed out so emotionally in Earth Song — he literally screamed it — do we give a damn?

The answer collectively is a resounding — About what?

Its not “No”. 

Its bored indifference. Casual apathy. Unfeeling ignorance. 

Its a yawn, an eye roll, a hand wave.

Its not even bothering to look up from scrolling social media.

Hashtags, trending topics, for you page.

Endless rabbit holes on youtube.

IG stories.

Discord servers.

Whatsapp group chats.

Twitch streams.

The age of giving a damn is over.

Time for AI, time for robotics, time for 80% of jobs to be replaced by AI, robotics, technology & automation.

Time for NeuraLink neural implants that will send an electronic signal to my neural synapses the millisecond a social media post receives a like.

Time for Google Glass — Version 2.0 — to play ads on our corneas and behind our eyelids.

Time for augmented and virtual reality to take the place of ever attending anything live ever again — sports game, concert and anything else — why attend anything live when I can just put on my VR & AR headset?

Why live my life when I have my virtual life on Metaverse?

I never have to live my offline life ever again.

I can permanently stay in the Metaverse.

Snowcrashed.

Ready Player One.

.Hack come to life.

The fictional video game depicted in Angel Sanctuary in the 90s — what the manga & anime was named after — has now come to fruition.

Aol Instant Messenger.

Youve got mail!

Yahoooooooooo.

Goooooooooooooogle results.

Dial up internet.

AOL 1.0.

AOL message boards.

Geocities. Angelfire. 

Netscape Navigator.

Does anyone remember the very recent past?

Non-smart cell phones.

No unlimited data.

No 5G, no 4G, no 3G.

No text messages.

No apps.

No social media.

Do you remember the time?

No streaming apps.

Music videos on TV. MTV. That's what Music Television was.

Music videos debuting on TV not Youtube.

Youtube didnt exist before 2005.

Does anyone remember the time?

When songs were three to four minutes long not two minutes?

When cell phones werent surgically permanently attached to our hands?

When we werent on our cell phones 8 to 12+ hours a day every day?

When social media wasnt ubiquitious?

Do you remember the time?

Project 2025 is a 1000 page policy paper.

Per Google: “This 1000-page synopsis focuses on how the next Republican administration should spend their first 180 days in office on uprooting bureaucracy that they consider to be favoring the liberal political agenda. The director of the project, Paul Dans described the project by its pressing goal of “flooding the zone with conservatives.”  

If successful, Project 2025 would facilitate the firing of approximately 50,000 federal workers. This mass exodus of a major workforce is merely a means to an end for the right-leaning Heritage Foundation and the other conservative corporations co-authoring the Project. They see the firing of career government officials as the most direct route to creating a federal bureaucracy filled with political loyalists.”

I dont have time to read 1000 words, much less a 1000 pages.

Does anyone remember a time before music videos?

Why do you think you havent heard as much about the Democrats version of Project 2025?

Its called the Modern Power Project.

Have you figured out yet that Democrats & Republicans are both controlled by the dark entities that inhabit the center of the planet of the earth?

They are the ones that install Reptilians as figureheads — Biden, Trump, Netanyahu, Blinken, etc.

Look at the eyes.

They are Reptilians.

All US Presidents descend from the same UK royal bloodline. 

Look up the genetic testing that has been done.

They are Reptilians.

The dark entities that inhabit the center of the earth placed a power grid on earth multiple millennia ago designed to keep humanitys consciousness at a lower level indefinitely so that they would be able to enslave & control us.

The Reptilians are their enforcers.

Dark empaths and malignant narcissists are their foot soldiers.

The dark entities that inhabit the center of the earth do not want humanity on a mass level raising their consciousness, experiencing their ego deaths, opening their third eyes, experiencing a kundalini awakening, self-actualizing and self-ascending.

If humanity on a mass level does the above and mass ascends, the planet — earth — will also ascend from our current 3D to 10D multidimensional living.

If you are a starseed, indigo child or angelic empath like me, and like Youneekk, your mission is to do everything you can in your own way for humanity to experience a mass consciousness raising.

Youre not human. 

Its a temporary manifestation.

You are only temporarily manifested as a human. 

Remember who you are.

You are an eternal energetic limitless being that originated in the dreamscape.

Thats all the afterlife is — your imagination.

We all intrinsically know from the time that we are children that we can dream and imagine anything.

Thats all the afterlife — dreamscape — is.

Its a multidimensional dimension that we all have existed in prior to our very, very temporary manifestations as humans for eternity.

Just like the “Big Bang” (Kemetic Explosion), we have existed eternally just like the universe and everything in it.

The creation explosion exploded out in a multifractal explosion of light eternally into the past and present in one eternal moment of creation that created everything — humans, unicorns, angels, dragons, gods, mermaids, whales, dolphins, wizards, magick, spells, fairies, sirens, mages, potions, incantations, poetry, art, music, creative expression, crystal balls…

Please Save My Earth, a 90s anime & manga, is actually real. 

That is why people sent letters to the editor of the publication that the manga was originally serialized in stating that the manga brought back their memories — that they were actually aliens from a distant planet in a past life like the main characters that were sent to Earth in their current life to save the planet from ecological destruction.

Please Save My Earth is just describing starseeds & indigo children as that is our mission and the “past life on a distant planet” represented in the anime and manga is simply remembering that prior to you physically incarnating as a human being when your human parents conceived you, you were a limitless energetic eternal being in the dreamscape — you were highly empathic, sensitive, third eye open, self actualized and self ascended — then the process of incarnating as a physical human being in a 3D realm when your parents conceived you severed you from your true self.

Especially if youre American, you were then raised in a western capitalist society with the number one military and economy in the world — a patrimony, patriarchy, fascistic police state based on systems of inequality oppression and police brutality, white supremacy, free labor from enslaved Africans with no restitution or reparations ever paid to descendants that built this country, genocide of the Native Americans, Trail of Tears, zionist devil, funding the genocide in Palestine & supplying the weapons through Boeing, Raytheon, Northrup Grumman to murder 50k innocent Palestinian civilians, transphobic, homophobic, ableist, might makes right, exploitative, low down and dirty, cutting corners, killing whistleblowers, everybody dog food.

Hyper competition, being treated as a machine, dehumanized, being treated as a robot, a cog in the capitalist machine, being programmed to keep your head down and work, play through injuries, work while sick, “pain is weakness leaving the body”, militaristic, hegemonic, xenophobic, millions of poverty related deaths but povertys never addressed, industrial complex pipelines that lead directly to prison and/or death — foster “care” system, cancer industry, medical industry, pharmaceutical industry, NFL, WWE, adult film industry, NASCAR, PBR, UFC, boxing, psychiatric industry, OTC industry, opioid industry, corporate America, retail, fast food, food service, K-12 indoctrination centers, colleges & universities, US military, Pop Warner, fraternities & sororities, weight loss & diet industries, plastic surgery industry, cosmetics industry, alcohol industry, snack industry, beverage industry, meat industry, self care industry, social media, gaming, streaming, reality TV, big tech, big banks, finserv, Wall Street, Fortune 500, Fortune 100, Fortune 25, Fortune 10, Hollywood, music industry, TV industry, publishing industry, theater & Broadway, dancing, stripping…

Remember who you are…

[gashinabts]

philophobia|(m)

Words: 7.4k

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Genre: Angst, Smut, Fluff, Mature

Summary: Taehyung, a man, who swears he’ll never fall in love meets Y/N a hopeless romantic.

Warnings: Teasing, spitting, oral (f/receiving), fingering, pussy slapping, pussy sniffing ( lmao idk if thats a thing?), squirting, sexual intercourse, mention of homophobia. Topics of child neglecting, if this makes you uncomfortable pls don’t read :) minor character death

A/N: Taehyung is a bisexual king! Tell me what you peeps think, remember that comments motivate me to continue writing!!! This is my work, no reposting this and my other works on any other platforms.

Kim Taehyung was born December 30, 1995 his father left him when he was 11 years old that is when Taehyung realized that love never lasts. His mother pretended that his father never existed, she quickly hid the family photos away, along with covering his tomato garden with dirt. Taehyung wanted to ask where he went but stopped wondering when he heard a few of his classmates whispering that Taehyung’s dad left them for a young woman in her twenties. 

As Taehyung grew into his teenage years he would often get asked out by his classmates, he wouldn’t decline, accepting the dates to see if he can ever fall foolishly in love like his Mom once did. However, nothing ever happened, he would kiss them goodnight but won’t call them the next day. In high school he lost his virginity at a party, he wasn’t nervous, just did things he’s seen in filthy pornorgraphy. The very next day the girl spread the rumor that Taehyung was a sex god, that he probably had sex everyday with a different people. Was that a compliment? He remembered thinking to himself as he sat in the back of the classroom, feeling people secretly stare at him. 

That day he met Jimin. Jimin was a popular boy that everyone swoon over. Of course he had a girlfriend, they have been dating since middle school. The guys would gawk at her when she would wear a sports bra to track practice. Taehyung was in art class sketching an apple, Jimin came over and talked to him as if they were friends. It was nice, Taehyung listened to Jimin complain about his art. When class was over, Jimin asked Taehyung to hang out with him after school. When Taehyung sat on Jimin’s bed, he looked over on the desk and saw a picture of Jimin and his girlfriend. Right next to it was a picture of what he assumed was Jimin’s family. A Mom, Dad, an older brother, and Jimin. He turned his gaze back to Jimin...who was undressing in front of him. Jimin’s underwear was the only thing on, Taehyung didn’t expect him to have lean muscles and define abs. An hour later  they were both breathless, exhausted from the sex. 

“ I’m not gay.” Jimin tells Taehyung as he cleans himself with a rag. 

“ Okay.” Taehyung shrugs and pulls his pants up. He’s watched gay porn and straight porn before and got turned on by both of them, so it doesn’t come to much of a surprise that he enjoyed the sex with Jimin. 

*******

Taehyung watches from afar when Jimin kisses his girlfriend in the school halls, wondering if that’s love. The next few months, Taehyung and Jimin fool around more. Jimin would call Taehyung over, then they would fuck and they would both be on their way. There were never conversations or pillow talks, until right now.

“ I’m gay.” Jimin confesses to Taehyung. 

“Cool.” Taehyung shrugs, looking for his shoes. 

“ That’s all your gonna say?” Jimin rolls his eyes grabbing his t-shirt wiping the come on his stomach. 

“ I’m bisexual, happy?” Taehyung looks at his phone and notices a missed call from his mother. He tucks his phone away, “ Why are you still with her? Your girlfriend.” He finally asks the question he’s been meaning to ask since the beginning.

“ I love her and I don’t want to hurt her, but I can’t love her like that.” Jimin looks at the picture of them and flips it down, almost ashamed of how much of a coward he is. “ Plus my Dad would kill me if I told him I like men.” He throws his head back looking at the ceiling not wanting to cry his eyes out. 

Taehyung thinks love is complicated, he thinks people who are in love are selfish. They rather hurt themselves for the sake of love. It’s stupid he wants to tell Jimin that but he keeps quiet until Jimin looks at him with tears eyes. “ I don’t know what to say…”

“It’s fine...you don’t have to say anything just keep me company, yeah?” 

“ Okay,” Taehyung sits back on the bed watching but not really watching tv with Jimin. 

---

Taehyung’s mom was proud of him when he got accepted to a good college, she would brag to her friends and show pictures of his acceptance letters. Along with bragging how she raised Taehyung all by herself. Taehyung didn’t mind that he was in the spotlight, whatever made his mom happy he would comply with whatever she does. He was good with numbers so he was going to major in data analysis, he really wanted to major in art but his mom laughed in his face, telling him to be realistic. 

Taehyung is now in his third year of college, wanting to just graduate already, done with the shitload of classwork and long ass lectures. Just right now he just finished his homework that took him three hours. He’s about to call it a night until Jungkook barges in his room, yelling at him to get dressed for a party. Taehyung switches his dirty hoodie with a clean hoodie, opting out grey sweatpants with jeans. He keeps his glasses on, due to his eyes being tired and not wanting to irritate them with contacts. 

Jungkook hands Taehyung a drink, there’s obscene music, blunts being handed around, and people grinding on each other. “ When’s the last time you got laid?” Jungkook asked, as he took a gulp of his beer.

“ Last week...I think.” Taehyung searches through his mental sex list, but can’t seem to remember the girls face or name. He looks around and watches a couple argue with each other. The man rolls his eyes as the woman tries not to cry, the woman ends up leaving him and going upstairs.

“ Damn, lucky. I tried to hook up with this girl and she ended up leaving me hanging. Claimed that she’s not over her boyfriend, started crying on me when I was going down on her.” Jungkook cringes, sipping more alcohol. “ Be my wingman, yeah?” 

“ Sure,” Taehyung nods. Jungkook is talking to this pretty girl, and she laughs at every joke that Jungkook makes. Taehyung wasn’t even sure why he asked him to his wingman when Jungkook can easily get a girl to bed. Jungkook nods absentmindedly when Taehyung excuses himself, he wanders around the frat house looking at people getting wasted. Once he gets tired of it he goes upstairs, hoping to find solace in an empty room. He opens a bedroom door, and notices a girl with a pencil and notebook. “ My bad-,” Taehyung is about to close the door.

You look up from your sketchpad, you see a tall man with messy curls and glasses. “ You can stay,” you observe him, he looks like he was forced to come here. There’s no red solo cup in his hand, he looks like he hasn’t a good night's rest. Also why else would he look mindlessly into rooms, the bathroom doors have a handwritten sign stating ‘BATHROOM’, so he must be bored or something searching into bedrooms. “ Or don’t. I don’t care.” You watch him close the door, entering the room.

“ Is this your room?” Taehyung looks around the room, noticing posters of naked women and marvel posters. Weird combination he notes. Along with the dirty clothes scattered all over the floor. 

“ No,” you laugh. Shutting your notebook close, taking notice of his nice hands brushing his hair back. “ My friend’s room. I didn’t really feel like partying just decided to sketch,” you lift your pad up. He nods and sits on the bed.

“ Can I draw?” Taehyung points towards the sketchpad. He hasn’t drawn in months too busy in his schoolwork, his fingers would sometimes draw on foggy windows but nothing more. You nod tearing a piece of paper out and handing him a pencil, he thanks you. 

You were sneakily glancing at him, sketching him, his angular jaw, messing hair, uneven eyelid, long eyelashes. Getting lost at his elegant features, wondering if he knows how beautiful he looks. You shake your head for easily fawning over this man. His hands are even beautiful, they travel across the paper gracefully with each stroke. You turn your eyes away when he makes eye contact with you, cheeks getting warm. “ What’s your name?” You ask while shading the contours of his cheeks.

“ Taehyung.” He folded his paper into a small square, putting it into his pocket. “ Yours?”

“ Y/N,” you smile.

---

“ Did you get laid yesterday night?” Jungkook is shirtless with scratch marks behind his back, there’s a couple of hickies on his neck.

Taehyung takes a sip of his tea before answering, “No, just talking to some girl. Her name is Y/N.” 

“ Y/N. She’s a nice girl. One time I forgot a scantron for class and she gave me one. She’s also friends with Namjoon.” Jungkook pours himself coffee sitting next to Taehyung. “ Are you interested in her?”

Taehyung would be lying if said he wasn’t interested in you. When he entered the room he thought you were pretty and had a kind smile. “ Maybe...why?” 

“ It’s best if you don’t try to get at her. Y/N looks the type to fall in love easily.” Jungkook sighs cracking his back on the back of the chair, groaning at his achy body. Taehyung wonders how can someone fall in love easily, he’s not one to believe in love at first sight or any kind of stuff in that realm. “ Alright, I’m gonna take a quick shower and then we can leave.” 

Taehyung and Jungkook are at the library studying or trying to study, Jungkook is texting someone the whole time instead of studying for his macroeconimics test. While Taehyung is playing video games on his phone. “ Hey guys! Didn’t know you actually study Jungkook,” Namjoon jokes, ruffling Jungkook’s hair. Jungkook rolls his eyes pushing his hand off his head mumbling curse words at him. Taehyung looks to the side of Namjoon and notices you laughing as the scene unfolds. You’re carrying ice americanos and Jungkook immediately takes it out of the carrier, thanking you. 

You look at Taehyung placing one in front of him, “ I didn’t know what kind of coffee you liked.” Taehyung is wearing similar clothing to what he wore at the party, mostly muted green colors and his circle glasses, his hair is pushed back with a headband. He looks surprised to see you, but nevertheless thanks you for the coffee. The conversations between Jungkook and Namjoon get more serious when they finally decide to study for their materials. You try to study but you want to talk to Taehyung wanting to get to know him more, you nudge your foot against his leg. He looks up, looking at you in question, you nod your head towards the exit entrance, he nods slowly unsure to what you're up to but following your lead. Jungkook and Namjoon are too invested in their studying to see you and Taehyung leave. “ Do you wanna go to my apartment?”

“ Sure,” Taehyung shrugs. The apartment was small and kind of messy, you try to hurry up and toss some of the paintbrushes in the sink. There’s water cups filled with murky colors, and paint marks on the tables, he’s not used to a sight like this. In his apartment it is always clean and tidy, not a dirty plate in sight. “ You live by yourself?” he asked, placing his stuff on the table. 

“ Yeah, my roommate moved four months ago with her boyfriend.” You give up cleaning the mess since there’s too much to clean. “ Want some-” You are interrupted when you feel Taehyung’s lips on your, your hands push his chest flustered at the sudden kiss.

“ I-I- sorry...I must have read something wrong,” he looks embarrassed immediately backing up giving you space. “ I thought you invited me to your apartment for sex.” Taehyung notices how your eyes widen, fuck he feels like an ass, scared that he made you uncomfortable. “ I should go…” he goes to pick up his bags ready to bolt out.

“ I just wanted to talk...to get to know you better,” you speak before his hands grab the doorknob. “ We can paint and talk, if that's okay with you?” 

“ Are you sure? You don’t want me to leave?” 

“ Stay.” You go to the sink to wash your dirty brushes. 

Taehyung sits down looking at the wall, notices a canvas of a man, he has plump lips, gentle eyes, overall he is beautiful, something that seemed out of this world. Maybe it was the way it was painted that made it appear like that. “ You painted that?” Taehyung speaks shifting his gaze to you.

You look at where Taehyung was pointing at, it was the painting of your ex boyfriend, “ Yeah, that’s my ex boyfriend, Seokjin. The professor told us to paint the definition of love…,” you stare at Seokjin’s face, remembering the memories you shared. The brushes are all cleaned and you set them down, grabbing some water colors that are in the cabinet. 

“ Do you still love him?” Taehyung curiously asked, watching carefully at your reaction.

There’s a slight pain of thinking about him, truly not over his death. “ Yeah I’ll always have love for him…” 

Taehyung wants to ask more about him but doesn’t want to intrude, he doesn’t say anything else but paints. This is when Taehyung feels like he’s truly being himself painting, expressing himself without saying anything. Moments like these wish Taehyung would’ve chosen doing what he has a passion for insteading appealing to his mothers standards. 

“ Why are you a data analysis major?” The artwork he is doing is remarkable, there’s dark undertones and eerie about it but it is beautiful something that you have to keep staring at.

He chuckles, “ Because I need to eat.” You look down feeling a little insulted he must've noticed since he immediately apologizes. 

“ It’s okay. You know if you ever want to relax and paint, you can come here,” you continue painting small flowers. The first time, he smiles and nods his head.

---

5 months later

This is the third flower shop visited and he’s getting more tired with each second. “ This arrangement or this one?” You ask Taehyung, as you hold two bouquets. One was more filled with carnations and the other was filled with lilies. He gives it some thought before pointing at the carnations. “ This would be pretty to paint,” you smell it getting happy inside.

“ Finally, when can we eat...I didn't eat anything this morning,” his stomach growls at the thought of food. He’s still carrying the vases you bought at the thrift shop, you had to plead with you to not buy another antique mirror because he knows he would have to carry it to the apartment.

You gave the cashier the money, as he wraps the flowers in newspaper, turning your head you look at Taehyung, “ Why did you come with me if you were going to complain the whole time?” You laugh at his scrunched nose as you pinch it. The flowers are handed back and you thank the cashier, leaving with Taehyung.

“ Because I wanted to,” Taehyung shrugs. In your apartment he puts the flowers away as you cook him food, he always enjoys your cooking. When he was younger all he ever ate was ramen, never really ate some home cooked meals, his mother was always busy working trying to financially support the family so he never once asked his mom for dinner. Even at his own apartment he doesn’t eat Jungkook’s food since he doesn’t know how to cook either. Sometimes when he’s hungry he’ll just come to your apartment and you’ll be more than happy to cook for him.

When Taehyung enters his apartment Jungkook is watching anime, foot propped on the table and sipping some beer. “ Back from your girlfriends’ so soon?” 

“ Not my girlfriend but yeah, I left my schoolwork here so I had to come back,” he sighs. Taehyung doesn’t get mad when Jungkook teases him about you being his girlfriend, but he sometimes gets annoyed. He likes the friendship between the two of you, it’s different from any other friendships he had in the past. “ Tomorrow night the apartment is mine. This guy wants to hangout with me.”

“ Just say he wants to fuck you,” Jungkook yells as Taehyung closes his bedroom door. 

---

You meet Taehyung at the park with some bread, he hugs you and asks about your day. “ It was okay. Had lunch with my Dad, but it always ends up in some lecture. I swear, sometimes it feels like I’m fifteen or something,” you tear a piece of bread throwing it into the pond watching some ducks gobble it. You try to look at Taehyung but it hurts when you see some hickies on his neck. On the day you were about to confess your feelings to Taehyung you asked him if he ever loved someone, he laughed and said that he doesn’t believe in no such thing as love. As much as you wanted to disapprove of that idea, you couldn’t be the one to change it.

He grabs some bread, chucking some pieces out, “ What was the argument?”

You laugh thinking about your Dad’s red face, “ I invited him to my apartment, and he found the blunt we smoked together in the ashtray.”

“ Shit, I should’ve thrown it away,” Taehyung laughs too, pushing some of his hair back. 

“ Just glad he didn’t find any of my sex toys,” you cringe just thinking about it. You feel something tugging the end of your skirt, looking down you see a toddler smiling cheekily pointing at the bread. You smile, “ Here, have fun,” you hand him the rest of your bread. You watch him wobble as he runs to his mother throwing the whole slice in the water. 

“ Sex toys?” Taehyung asked once the child was out of sight. “ Like what?,” Taehyung is interested, he doesn’t know, maybe because he can’t imagine you using them. Or he wants to know how you use it. There were times when Taehyung wanted to have sex with you but he turned those urges off. He doesn’t want to give you mixed signals remembering Jungkook’s words of advice. “ Never-”

“ A dildo, vibrator, hitachi wand, or even my favorite pillow,” you trail off not thinking much until you realize who you are confessing to. “ I-I uh…”

“ How often?,” Taehyung asked quietly, not wanting any other people hearing the conversation. He shouldn’t get turned on but he is.

Something about Taehyung’s deep quiet voice is making you squeeze your thighs, “ Every night…” You're still looking at the pond, watching the ripples that are caused by the ducks swimming away. You can feel Taehyung's stare but you ignore it. The conversation switches to another topic when you talk about your school work. The sun sets and you both part ways.

The sound of tea kettle wakes you up from your concentration of you sketching, sighing you pour yourself the tea. Looking at your art, you turn it over not wanting to see Taehyung’s face right now. But fate has different plans when you hear knocking on the door, Taehyung appears, he lets himself in and is close to your face.

“ Taehyung?” You’re puzzled at his frazzled state, deeply staring into your eyes. 

“ Can I kiss you?” The words are quiet but firm. Stupidly you nod, not caring about any consequences. His hands cup your face, immediately going into the kiss. The kisses get deeper, his hands travel to your hips bringing you closer to him quickly, you lose friction from the fluffy socks you're wearing causing you to slip, immediately grabbing Taehyung as you fall backwards. His hands are quick to save himself from not falling onto you. There’s a slight pain on your tailbone but is immediately forgotten when Taehyung goes back to kissing you.

The big t-shirt you are wearing is tossed, his hands immediately fondle your breast, his lips leaving kisses on your neck, groaning as he pushes his bulge against your clothed core. “ Taehyung...let me touch you,” you moan when he bites your neck. He pulls back, pecking your lips before taking off his clothes. Your hands trail against his chest, his stomach, towards his pelvic, trying to remember every part of him. He is surprised to have you touching him like he was some marvel statue, usually his past hookups just rush into the sex. It’s very intimate and he doesn’t know how to feel about it.

 Taehyung groans when you touch his dick, he’s hard and wants to be inside of you already. He comes down kissing you, his hands get rid of your panties, fingers spreading your wetness. The moans you let out are turning him on even more, he stretches you out with his fingers. He likes the way your eyes flutter, the shape of your lips tremble, along with your chest inhaling and exhaling deeply. “ You are so pretty,” he doesn’t mean to say it loudly but he does. There’s a blush that blooms on your cheeks, it reminds him of the flowers you would get to study paint.

“ Taehyung,” you moan slightly flustered at his compliment. He reaches for his pants grabbing a condom. “ You don’t want to go to the bedroom?” The floor is still cold against your back, and the last time you cleaned the floor was days ago. 

Taehyung shakes head, already putting on the condom not wanting to waste time, “ Too far,” he smiles when you laugh. He enters you feeling you clench tightly around, he moans digging his head into your neck. “ You are so tight,” he groans. “ Feels so fucking good, having you like this,” he confesses.

You moan loudly, his thick cock streching “ Oh fuck, Taehyung, please just fuck me,” your hands go to his waist urging him to move. He listens to your command, thrusting slowly trying to get deep as he can. Maybe if you can close your eyes you can pretend that he’s in love with you. He goes faster and cries at the pace he’s going, the pleasure is overwhelming, something that you can’t get with your own hands. “ I’m close already,” your hand goes to tug at his wavy hair.

“ Me too,” his voice is deeper. His hand travels down to your pussy searching for your clit and rubbing it. “ Come for me,” he says into your ear. You moan his name loudly, cumming around his cock, scratching his back. The sight of you creaming around him makes him immediately come, he searches for your lips, moaning your name in the kiss. The two of you lay in the afterglow of the sex, panting loudly his body is barely being hold up, and you laying on the hard floor.

Taehyung gets up throwing his condom away, he looks at you still laying on the floor with your eyes close, the realization of him having sex with you just popped up. He hurriedly gets dressed, then helps you get dressed, he gets shocked when you kiss him as a thank you. The next morning Taehyung wakes up early, making sure to leave quietly, not wanting to disrupt your sleep.

---

You weren’t going to lie, it kind of hurt not waking up beside Taehyung but you shouldn’t have gotten your hopes up. Namjoon invites you to a kick back, only inviting a few people to his house to chill and drink. You take solace on the couch, watching people get high and drunk, you weren’t in the mood to do either so you make conversation with a slightly high Hoseok. He’s in mid-discussion about Shrek being a cinematic masterpiece, when Jungkook yells from the door entrance that he has Taco Bell. Taehyung is beside him wearing all black beanie, crewneck, and sweatpants, but still looks better than half of the people here.

 You turn your gaze back to Hoseok who’s left walking towards Jungkook immediately grabbing a taco. Sighing you decide to get fresh air, staring at the tall dark buildings. “ Whatcha you doing here by yourself? It’s fucking freezing,” Taehyung speaks out closing the slider door standing by you. He takes off his vape pen inhaling it.

“ Wanted fresh air,” you shrug, still staring at the buildings. “ Hoseok left me for tacos. He was onto something, saying that Shrek is a masterpiece. Who knows maybe he’ll write his thesis about it.” Taehyung chuckles, he keeps looking at you and you finally stare at him. “ Why’d you kiss me yesterday?”

He blows out the smoke, and puts his pen away, “ Cuz I wanted to,” he shrugs not thinking much about it. 

“ Nothing else?” You arch your eyebrow.

He continues to stare into your eyes “ Nope,” he shakes his head.  

Some part of you wanted him to say that he had feelings for you but in the back of your mind you knew that wasn’t going to happen. You smile pushing his chest, “ Well that’s the last time we are ever going to do anything like that.” The both of you know that is a lie.

---

For the next couple of months you and Taehyung continue sleeping with each other.

When you are studying with Namjoon in the library, Jungkook and Taehyung spontaneously show up, causing Namjoon to groan. “ You know you love me,” Jungkook jokingly says sitting next to him. 

Taehyung sits down next to you, looking at your classwork, “ How long have you been studying,” he whispers. 

You turn to look at the time of your phone, “ Like four hours,” you sigh. He hands you a jolly rancher, you immediately put in your mouth. “ Why are you here? You texted me that you were going to take a fat ass nap?”

“ I wanted to see you, kind of missed you,” he lays his head against the table. His eyes close when you brush his soft hair. 

“ I’ll be done in forty minutes.” He lets off a quiet okay continuing to look at you doing your work. 

Taehyung wakes up to you caressing his cheek, his neck is in pain from the awkward position he slept in. “ Where did Jungkook and Namjoon go?,” he looks at the empty seats. He tries to crack his neck and watches you pack your stuff.

“ They left about twenty minutes ago,” you get up stretching your legs. “ Let’s head home. We still have left over pizza,” you groan at the pain on your lower back. 

For some odd reason Taehyung liked hearing you say home, there’s some comfort it gives him but he never says it out loud. Taehyung grabs your backpack, holding it for you as you walk towards your car. You look in the fridge for the pizza, but Taehyung has other plans when he closes the fridge door, pinning you against it kissing you feverishly, his tongue already begging for entrance. Laughing you push him away, “ What’s gotten into you?”

“ I told you...I miss you,” his hands are on your waist. He kisses you again, picking you up easily and placing you on the kitchen table. He takes off your pants and panties, and you reach for his pants but he stops you forcing you to lie completely on the table. “ Look at you, laying so pretty on the table,” he bends down kissing you on your lips before he goes down on you. 

He licks your cunt, gently prodding his tongue up and down. Your hips move frantically wanting to feel more of him. His rough hands pin your hips, and he continues with his teasing, lightly kissing your clit before touring you with his slow pace.  “ Look at your pussy, it looks like the roses you painted yesterday…,” his finger goes up and down your folds.

The words make your cheeks grow hot, “ No it doesn’t,” you get shy shaking your head. The embarrassment fills your body, for maybe shamelessly liking his compliment. You are probably never going to look at roses the same way ever again.

“ Yeah, it does Y/N, but your pussy is more pretty,” he continues to tease you. Wanting to see you get more flustered, he likes it when you do it gets him more turned on. “ I wonder if it smells like roses too,” he’s about to smell your pussy but you hold his head. He watches you cutely shake your head. 

Taehyung is filthy but it makes you get even more aroused. “ It won’t,” you whisper, wanting to cry but he shakes his kissing the inside of your thigh to try to comfort you. 

He smells your pussy and he groans, your heart thumps faster and nervous for what's about to say, “ It smells better,” he kisses your clit. His tongue keeps tracing your folds gently wanting to make you beg for more. The movement of his tongue makes you want to pull your own hair out. The pleasure is barely there but it grows within each second of his tongue flicking up and down.

“ Taehyung,” you let out desperate whine, “ please, I need more.” One of his hands slap your cunt, and your back arches surprise but even more turned on. You never knew that you were into that. The sting hurts at first but shoots up ecstasy after a nanosecond, you can’t help but seek more. “ More!” 

Taehyung lets out a dark chuckle, he gives you another slap, slightly harder on the center of your clit, the stinging making your face scrunch up but letting out a lewd moan. He groans at your wetness seeping out some of it landing on the table.

Suddenly, he is done with all the teasing, and dives in, nose touching your clit and tongue inside your entrance going in and out. Finding it extremely hot that you are riding his face, like the pillow on your bed. Taehyung vividly remembers when you showed him how you ride your pillow last week. The way you desperately let out cute whines trying so hard to relieve yourself as Taehyung only watched, wanting to see you get off without his help. 

He moves his face side to side so his nose can rub your clit. Head in the clouds, your body is floating with ecstasy wanting to stay in it forever. Your hands reach down trying to anchor yourself, Taehyung reaches for your hand holding it tight. You cry out his name loudly, coming intensely, your eyes are shut when it doesn’t seem to stop. Your body finally calms down, looking down you see Taehyung’s face is completely wet. “ Oh my god, did I-

“ Fuck, that was hot,” Taehyung wipes his face with the back his arm. He kisses your lips, he helps you from the table, handing you your panties. 

“ Let me repay you?,” you tug at his belt loop, you look down to see the bulge is gone and there’s a wet stain. Your eyes widen, “ Did you come?”

“ Yeah, you squirting on me, made me bust a nut. I swore I never came that hard either,” he sighs happily. Laughing you go towards the fridge, finally eating the cold pizza. You hand him one and he eats it in two bites. “ My mom called me today…”

Taehyung hardly talks about his family, you only know that he was raised only by his mother. He never talked bad about her but you can tell that they didn’t have a close  relationship. “ What happened?” You and Taehyung move so you're sitting on the couch.

“ She told me that my father wanted to meet up with me,” Taehyung rolls his eyes. “ Told her that I don’t want to. She started crying and telling me that he’s my father...I sometimes think she’s still in love with him. She’s an idiot.” He lays his back staring at the ceiling.

“ Sometimes it’s hard to get over someone that you once loved. The one you shared your laughs, arguments, touches, memories...vanish into thin air... or you could hold onto it. Love isn’t easy...it’s messy, it’s confusing but it’s beautiful being able to share it with someone. Don’t you think?” You look at Taehyung’s side profile.

Taehyung turns his head looking at you, “ I don’t know...I will never fall in love. I don’t want to end up like my parents,” he closes his eyes.

“ Taehyung-“

He opens his eyes smiling, grabbing your hands, “ Let’s head to bed,” already over the conversation. 

---

Jungkook is cooking breakfast and almost burns his hand when a random girl walks out of Taehyung’s room. Immediately she exits their apartment, doing the walk of shame. Taehyung walks out shirtless with hickies on his chest and dishevelled hair. Jungkook clears his throat, “ Thought you were seeing Y/N,” he turns off the stove.

Taehyung grabs a glass of water, “ We are just friends,” he takes several gulps.

Jungkook scoffs rolling his eyes at his friend’s stupidity, “ Yeah, friends who have sex, hold hands, and almost spend every night together. My bad I forgot they changed the definition of ‘friends’ in the Webster dictionary.”

“ Whatever man...I'm out of here,” Taehyung leaves the kitchen going to his room. He looks at himself in the mirror, disgusted at his appearance, at the splotchy marks on his neck. Why am I like this? Taehyung leaves his apartment ignoring Jungkook, entering your apartment with his set of keys. He looks at you cooking pancakes, you look at him quickly and smiling.

“ Hey...you want some? It’s your favorite banana pancakes,” you flip the pancake. He looks at the big stack of pancakes you have on the table, you continue with the last couple of pancakes and sit down taking a couple of bites. You are consumed by the taste, not really focusing on Taehyung until he clears his throat, looking at him you notice marks on his neck. Your heart plummets, you thought the whole time the two of you have been messing around he wasn’t seeing anyone else. “ You hooked up with someone else yesterday?,” you set your utensils down.

Taehyung nods trying to look nonchalant, “ Yeah, is that a problem?” 

“ No,” you try to lie to yourself but it’s no use, your face looks the opposite of how you feel, disheartening, you can’t save face even if your life's on the line. Swallowing hard you shake your head, “ Actually, yes. It is a problem,” you sigh. “ I don’t understand you. You treat me like a lover, but then you do things like this…” you get up from the kitchen table tossing the plates in the sink, not caring that you didn’t finish the meal, “ I open my heart with you but you don’t do the same. I feel used in this relationship or whatever the hell this is,” your hands clenched tightly as you turn around and face Taehyung.

He’s now by the kitchen counter standing up, “ I told you I’m not looking for love. I’m sorry if I gave you mixed feelings but I don’t want this to end whatever we have with each other. I like how things are-”

You scoff, rolling your eyes at his words, “ Well I don’t...if you want to fuck around then do it... I’m not going to care for you like I love you anymore.” The angry tears stream down your face, your hands wipe them before he could, “ Go Taehyung. I wish you the best,” his face is etched with subtle pain, turning away from him you wash the dishes not bothering to look at the sound of him leaving.

---

Three days later

Taehyung hasn’t been sleeping well, tossing and turning, giving up completely and decides to study all night long. This has been a daily occurrence since the fight with you. I’m not going to care for you like I love you anymore. Taehyung groans, wanting to get the image of you out of his brain. Jungkook knocks on his door, eyes widening at the sight of him, “ You look like shit, c’mon Namjoon is having another get together.”

When Taehyung shows up to the party he watches you have a conversation with Hoseok, from a far distant, unsure how you would react if you saw him. Taehyung waits till Hoseok leaves, walking towards you as you are on your phone texting someone. He watches you jolt as he calls your name. “ Hey,” you greet him but there’s no smile or warmth like you usually greet. And he hates it, it makes him feel like a stranger.

“ About the last time, I’m sorry that we got into an argument,” Taehyung apologizes, he tucks his hands in his pockets, a nervous tick he developed when he was elementary. 

“ Ok,” you nod your head, not wanting to discuss something so private in a social setting. “ I should get going, I got a research paper to go over,” you give him one last glance and leave, not saying goodbye to anyone else.

Taehyung doesn’t like the way your back faces him, leaving him all alone with a place full of people. He pushes against people not wanting to let you go so easily, he wants to talk to you, he wants to hear you talk. He wants to lay in your bed and listen to your heart beat while you stroke his hair, letting him fall asleep in your arms. You're opening your car door, and you halt when he calls your name, you wait patiently for what he’s going to say. Please stay.  “ I-I uh...I wish you the best, Y/N” Taehyung says. He watches you give him one last small smile and drive away. 

---

Six months later

Taehyung hates visiting his mother, there’s always something unsettling when he enters his childhood home. As soon as greets his mother she comments about his weight, his slightly long wavy hair, and baggy clothes. She doesn’t ask him college, she never does. Instead he listens to her talk about her work. “ I told your father that you're in town,” she says over the sound of the faucet. Taehyung nods, handing her the dirty dishes, “ I told him you are free tomorrow, you are going to visit him at IHOP,” she leaves no room for argument. 

The sun wakes up Taehyung before his alarm does, he doesn’t really put in effort to look nice but when his mother gives him a look, he changes into something more appropriate. Maybe if Taehyung was in middle school he would be nervous meeting his father but now that he’s an adult he couldn’t care less. It takes him a while to find his father, he looks older from his adolescent years, has a few gray hairs and slightly wrinkled skin. His father stands up, and Taehyung immediately holds his hand out giving him a handshake not wanting to receive an awkward hug. His father looks surprised but compiles, awkwardly laughing and sits down taking a gulp of his hot black coffee. “ I ordered your favorite,” his father points to the triple drizzle chocolate milkshake with a red cherry on top that is set in front of Taehyung. “ How are you kiddo? You look so grown up, your mother has been feeding you well, huh?”

“ Yup.” Taehyung looks at the red cherry. 

There’s too much uncomfortable tension, and his father is letting more awkward coughs to try to fill the silence. “ Almost done with college, yeah? Just three more months, and you gotta face the real world,” his father comments.

Taehyung has been facing the real world since he was a teenager, he worked when he was in highschool to pay for college, he cooked his own dinner because his mother always came home late, he didn’t need to graduate college to find out the world was shitty. “ Yeah.”

His father tries really hard to have some sort of conversation with his son.“ You still like to paint?”

Taehyung smiles, getting reminded of you. He wonders what you are doing right now, if you are painting the canvas he bought you when you guys were friends. “ No. I mean yeah, sorta. I painted with this girl, she made me fall back in love with painting but I did something horrible to her. Now I can’t paint without thinking about her,” he sighs. 

There’s surprise etched on his father’s face, since more than a word came out of his son’s mouth. “ Seems like a very important person to you. You should talk things out with her, don’t want to lose someone like that.” 

Taehyung rolls his eyes, “ Why? You did the same thing to us.”

“ Taehyung-”

“ You really fucked me up father, I hate that you and mom made me this way. I want to love her but I’m scared...what if she ends up leaving me like you did. I rather be alone for the rest of my life than to have someone steal a part of me,” Taehyung grits his teeth.

“ I-I I’m sorry Taehyung...I really am. I hate myself everyday for not visiting you, I should’ve been there for you...Your mother and I once loved each other but sometimes people fall out of love, but that doesn’t mean love is evil. Don’t give up on love because of our failed marriage, son, you deserve to be in love.”

---

One week later

“ Fuck, watch where you going asshole,” you yell at the asshole who wasn’t paying attention that made you drop all of your art supplies. He doesn’t even bother apologizing, just continues to walk with his friends. You pick up your pencils, someone helps you pick up your other materials. “ Thank-” you stop midway when your eyes are met with Taehyung. He hands you the sketchpads, you quickly put it in your bag, “ Thanks.”

“ No problem. You just got out of class?,” he asked intently looking at you.

His hair is pushed back by his headband, showing his forehead, he’s wearing his usual baggy grandpa clothes. It makes your heart flutter, but you quickly push the feeling away. “ Yeah, but I have to go back to pick up my two pieces,” you shrug. 

“ You need a hand?” He offers with a careful smile.

You contemplate, you don’t want to make two trips, “ If you’re not busy…”

He eagerly shakes his head. “ I’m not, let me help.” Taehyung follows you to the art room, and picks up the pieces easily despite it being large canvases. There’s silence when you are done putting it in your car. 

“ Thank you,” you give him a grateful smile. “ Do you need to ride home?”

Taehyung took his car to campus but he lies, he accepts your offer in hopes that you guys can talk things over. The radio is on low, and Taehyung is almost near his apartment, “ I lied I don’t need a ride,” he starts off and you let out a surprise laugh.

“ Why are you just telling me now?,” you are about two minutes from the destination. 

“ I wanted to talk to you about what happened to us-”

You sigh, not wanting to reopen bandage wounds on your heart, “ Taehyung, I’m over it-” 

His head turns to face you, “ I love you. I think I always loved you since we became friends. I was scared to tell you because it was something so new for me...I was selfish, I thought that everything we had was fine but I never took your feelings into consideration.” He’s breathing really hard because he finally confessed his heart out, something he vowed he’ll never do since he was a child. 

“ Why? Why now?,” you swallow hard, not looking at him but only the road. Scared that if you look into his eyes, you’ll get lost into them. 

“ It took me a while to come in terms with how I am feeling. Because love is messy right?,” his voice cracks.

The car is now parked in his driveway, “ Yeah, it is.” Turning to finally face him, he has little tears in his eyes that haven’t fallen. “ I still love you, Taehyung,” your hand touches his soft cheek, caressing it. Taehyung leans closer to you and you close your eyes expecting a kiss, instead he sobs against your neck. Feeling wet tears against your neck, you try to coddle him but the tight space in the car is not giving you any room to do so. “ Tae, why are you crying?,” you comb the back of his curls.

Taehyung pulls away giving you a tearful smile, “ Because for the first time in my life I know what love is.”

end.

[shad0wself]

I know u don’t care but just heard the worst take for p4 naoto’s gender 🙄 like what do u even mean he can’t be trans cause there’s always a even number of playable boys and girls?? like I’m not gonna do the research to see if that’s even true but even if it was teddie is right there /j beach scene canon says he’s one of the girls so 💅💖

ill be honest here i dont rl care about "even cast" boy/girl ratio thats dumb, in p5 (base game not p5r, i dont have royal) theres an uneven ratio. like who cares if theres more masc than fem presenting characters? thats probably one of the worst takes ive heard, youre right anon. and besides, in development, naoto was INTENDED to be male, while teddie was female. i dont know why it was swapped for canon but literally nao was SUPPOSED to be masc.

in p5r theres a new chick who makes it even but then in strikers theres another chick, idk if chick from royal is in there tho, my dog ate my strikers and i havent been able to replace it ... as for p3, i played it a LONG time ago and didnt get too far, so i dont know it well.

but no it all boils down to transphobia. transphobic media produced by transphobic company in a transphobic country in early 2000s. p4 came out 2008. p4g in 2012. iirc, mind you i was barely a "teen", 2012 was around when i remember a lot of lgbt changes happening, 2012-14 i mean. again, i was like. 12-14 at the time, but still, earliest i remember even for gay marriage was with president obama. all in all, its transphobia. lgbt phobia as a whole, considering they took OUT the yos romance route too.

(also, side note, and obv nothing against you anon, i misread the beginning of the ask and thought i was gonna get into some drama again bahaha... but thats on me, i misread is all ^^")

tho long story short, its a dumb argument to distract from the real issue of blatant transpbobia and really holds no weight at all in my book.

[pokefanclaire]

London Tourist

Hello! I’m so new to this but I have another Lucifendi ship fanfic (don’t judge me too harshly) Also I don’t own any rights to the game, or characters its purely my weird thoughts. So this one is about a visiter that will come to London, and the Commissioner has asked Lucy to be his tour guide but Alfendi gets jealous and mutual pining happens. Pretty tame but please let me know what I'm doing as its all so new! Any advice would be greatly recieved.

London Tourist:

Lucy quietly knocked onto the commissioners office door startling him from an unexpected evening nap.

“Ah Lucy my dear, take a seat. Thank you for coming to see me at such short notice. The matter I want to share with you is of a personal nature. So please excuse that I have chosen you specifically”

Lucy suddenly felt uneasy.

“I have a friend, a very dear friend of mine who’s son will be coming to London for a few days and I was hoping you would be kind enough to show him around London. Inspector Layton will be able to maintain the cases for you while you’re away. I would like you to do this as a favour to me personally so all expenses will be covered by me. Is that clear my dear. I have had my assistant book tickets for some interesting plays, tours and visits that I believe will interest a couple of like minded youths as yourselves?”

“sounds grand sir”

she beamed at the commissioner thankful her unease was unwarranted.

“His name is Eric, he is your age I believe possibly a year older. I’m certain you’ll get along very well. He will be a calm and welcome change from your changeable mentor.”

“I look forward to meeting ‘im”

Lucy felt very proud that out of all her colleagues she had been chosen to show the commissioners dear friend’s son around London.

“thank you Lucy, that will be everything. And I thank you for rising to the challenge of tour guide” He chuckled as Lucy skipped toward to door. ‘What a sweet and generous girl’.

“Night Commissioner! Thanks agai’”

“Good night.”

Lucy ran back to the Mystery room hoping her mentor would still be around to hear her ‘mission’. Opening the door Lucy was greeted by an exhausted placid Prof stretched out on the sofa with case files scattering the dimly lit room

“Lucy dear! You’re still here.”

“I’ve jus’ finished speaking with th’ commissioner”

“ah yes, of course. Sorry Lucy I momentarily lost track of myself. Are you about to embark on a solo mission? Can you tell me any details or is it on a need to know basis?”

Alfendi chuckled toward Lucy, adoring the pride on her face.

“oh it’s nowt like that Prof, its a personal favour the commissioner would like me to do for his good friend. He wants me to take care of his friend’s son while he visits London”

Alfendis eyes shot up to meet hers “He?”

“yea, some lad a similar age to me. Eric I think it wer’”

“…and…. you said yes?”

“’course Prof, I cant let him down. Besides I don’ have no reason to turn him down”

“……. oh”

“you can ‘elp if you like? You know London better than anyone ‘ere at Scotland yard. I still feel like a tourist”

“...doubt he’ll want to see the London eye once he sets eyes on you dear Lucy...” his voice suddenly sounded bitter as a streak of crimson hair washed over his head.

“Um hi Potty, I wasn’t expecting you this late in the evening”

Alfendi’s eyes were hidden under crimson dishevelled hair making it hard to read his expression but a smirk pulled at the edge of his smile.

“Just fine my dear Lucy, and yes I would be thrilled to guide you when my schedule allows. In fact i’m quite free now”

“We can wait for Eric. He will arrive tomorrow afternoon some time, and I have ‘is number here”

Potty Prof strode toward Lucy unexpectedly grabbing her wrists.

“In that case, now is the very best time to show you the city before any corruption. Don’t you agree dear Baker?”

His grip worsened on her now pink wrists. Before she could register the twinge of pain, Alfendi had pulled her forward sending her tumbling into his chest.

“Clumsy girl” he sneered. “falling for me are you my dear Lucy?”

Lucy looked up, unable to process the last few exchange of words.

“sto’ messin’ with me Potty”

Alfendi towered over her, a streak of red flashed across his cheeks as he crouched to meet her eyes.

“I haven't started yet my dear, now please collect your belongings. I really must show you what London can do to you before Eric has the chance”

‘Did I hear that ‘ight? Is he jealous of some lad I haven't even met seeing London wi’ me?’ Lucy had never seen her mentor like this. Lucy had regular run ins with Potty Prof, that wasn't new. But she was sure he had some new found venom in his voice while pronouncing his name too...

Lucy struggled to keep up with Alfendi’s new speed and determination to leave the mystery room.

“Baker! Come on!”

a desperate sounding Alfendi held his hand out to take Lucy’s. Pulling her from the room he fumbled with keys, hastily locking the Mystery room.

“I’ll get the commissioner for this.. I swear….” he snarled under her breath to no one in particular.

Alfendi took a deep breath “Lucy dear….” He held out a slightly trembling hand to her “….please allow me to…show you….what i’ve longed to… for some time… but if I can just....” He stumbled as flashes of burgundy replaced the crimson red of his hair “.. accompany you this evening” he finished by kissing the back of her hand.

“Prof? Are ya ok?”

“Yes dear, I just wish I had more time than fate has decided to grant me, more time so that… I could show you both sides.. and how… he is all bark.. he wouldn't hurt her....”

Alfendi’s train of conversation trailed off as he began muttering to himself. Or his other side she thought.

“prof if ya sure its not an inconvenience. Then lets go! Where first?”

Splashes of red and dishevelled hair gave Lucy a small jump.

“oh hi Potty! Where to first?”

“Baker, dear Baker...” He whispered in a sultry tone forcing her to take a step backwards.

“Why don’t we start here?”

Alfendi increased his steps toward Lucy.

Lucy instinctively stepped back matching his speed knowing how unpredictable Potty could be. Her wrists let out a twang of pain reminding her of his last practical joke on her. ‘You’re tougher than this Lucy lass’ she encouraged herself ‘He’s your Prof, he wont ‘urt you’ she glanced left and right in blind panic looking for an escape. Alfendi cupped her chin with his hand bringing her wide eyes to meet his. ‘Don’t panic’ Lucy thought as she acknowledged Pottys hand on her chin, softer and gentler than she expected. A rush of heat rose to her cheeks as she breathed in that familiar scent of her beloved Prof ‘Why now Potty? always keeping me on my toes’ an audible groaned slipped past her lips as she felt his heated breath against her lips

“Potty?...”

She took a step back to gain some distance.

THUD.

Lucy’s back met with the wall.

“yes dear?….”

Alfendis hand slid down her chin, caressing the soft skin of her neck.

“you know Baker, I wanted more time… This little situation with Eric has meant I have had to adapt to time constraints” he took a final step closer to Lucy closing the distance between them

“…..will you forgive me if I act at all un-gentelmanly under these circumstances….”

He lowered his hands to meet hers, lifting them above her head in one fast and smooth motion.

“….Prof? What’ got into ya all sudden like”

Lucy’s hands struggled against Alfendi’s but he was taller, stronger and currently sporting his darker persona.

“this aint some time to joke ya kno’ Prof ya said ya were gonna show me London before Eric arrives”

Alfendi leaned into her neck, his breath uneven and franticagainst her ear.

All the hair on the back of her neck rose as waves of electricity seemed to shoot down from her now numb arms held above her head. The comforting smell of Alfendi filled her head and she bit down on her bottom lip letting out a small squeal.

“I said i’d show you what I… I mean London can do to you..”

“Please Prof my arms.. they hurt a little”

Crimson hair flashedto deep burgundy as he let go on Lucy’s arms.

“Lucy, please forgive me, are you in pain? Are you okay.. please forgive me...us?”

Alfendi nuzzled his face into her neck not wishing to meet her eyes and confirm what he already knew.. that he had blown any future chance with his sweet Lucy. he spoke softly. 

“Please Lucy, its me I wont hurt you. I’m so sorry”

“Prof...”

“Lucy?”

Alfendi took a cautious step back and forced himself to meet with her rubyred eyes. Lucy stared into the Prof’s soft amber eyes, taking in the look of embarrassment and hurt that marked his face.

Alfendi scanned her face in a panic searching for clues to her expression was she upset? Scared? no. thats not it. A soft glow of red spread across her cheeks intensifying the ruby red of her beautiful eyes.

“Prof, my ‘ands were numb is all. Dont fret, I aint hurt”

Alfendi studied her face with desperate closeness causing Lucy to blush brighter with fresh heat flooding to her cheeks

“Prof please...”

she stifled a moan by biting down on her own lip wincing.

“Lucy dear…I cant begin to…”

“Prof’.Al......”She paused “Alfendi. I was never in any danger..not from you.”

An unfamiliar serious expression marked Lucy’s sweet face as she matched Alfendi’s closeness causing him to take a step back.

“wasn’t there something important you wanted to do to me Alfendi...?”

[naturalbornkillass]

delayed post from 07/10/22 - A weird week: still depressed // might need to get the “hottest girl in rehab” sweatshirt. // modern feminism // why am i attracted to older men i dont even ducking have daddy issues

The last part happened today but i’ll include it into my evenfully unevenful week

i’ve been ridiculously depressed and irritable this week. i havent touched my prescripted medicine and i probably should. i’m in no way getting better.

During the 4th of july, i got into a hugeeee argument with my dad and i ended up staying home and playing roblox w my friends. it was kinda fun, then it all hit me. I’m at home during the 4th of july, doing absolutely nothing. I was bored and depressed. I HAD NOTHING TO DO!! So I ordered some food from grubhub and it made me feel better for a little bit. Then it hit me again. I'm getting fomo. How can i celebrate the 4th. of july? and listen I’m not the most patriotic citizen, and to be honest, i’m not big on independence day. although I am big on the celebrations itself, whether or not i really give a fuck about the reason of the celebration .

i decided to try lsd for the first time, and it was def the most sensational type of high i’ve ever experienced. especially bc it was laced with some other strong ass shit, which i didn't really know until i got tested positive for other stuff. I didn't rly mind tho, i had a good time regardless. My therapist was not happy ofc, so they actually told me that they may have to send me to a 30 day rehabilitation program if things don’t improve within the next week. It’s either that, or I have to stay at a psych ward for 7 days minimum, which isnt as bad, given that it’s so easy to trick them into thinking that you’re doing well within the span of a week. But either way, i’ll be stripped away from any sort of communication with all of you. unless i can memorize all of your number. not tryna do all that.

I'm against it, obviously. I’m functioning! I should be fine.

The reason why i’m not making such a big deal out of this is bc I’m not being too irresponsible with everything. Honestly i really do believe that they’re just trying to profit off of me. No one really knows what to do in those places. None of the staff members really know what they were getting themselves into. If you’re there for the money, why cant you at least try to put some effort on the shit tht you were supposed to do?

if i do end up in one in the future, best believe i’m pulling up in the corniest fit ever

but fr tho i actually have to start putting some effort because i’m not trying to go to some goddamn facility. I have many plans for this summer and living in a place w a bunch of druggiez isnt my thing. if all fails, i hope to be grouped with cool people.

i met someone on roblox, which i’ve spent a few hours with….at night. it was fun okay, and im not for edating, but this is entertaining for me. i wonder how many ppl he’s groomed online. better yet, i wonder how many people get groomed on roblox??? He’s 21 btw i forgot to mention, and yeah he does sound like it. Thats all i can say tho.

The thing is, you’ll never know if your the groomer or the groomee. Edating is so funny to me despite the times that i’ve attempted to do so. I got out of that phase towards the beginning(-ish?) of 9th grade. After that, I’ve just started fishing for some creepy pedos online and i tried to see if i can get money off of them. I found many, but they all wanted my fucking face to be in pictures/videos and they wanted to be able to hear my voice and such, like how desperate can you be? Theyre all really fucking pathetic and it just pissed me off seeing people live like that. Discord users are really something else……..

just dont edate. It's that easy.

One thing that I have noticed is that I kinda have a problem with older men. Why am I writing about this online rather than telling a professional about this? Idk but I just felt like it needs to be talked about. No, I don't have daddy issues, which proves that it's only a common stereotype. Women have such a great amount of power, simply just by existing. Next thing you know, you've hypnotized them into throwing their cash onto you.

[iamtheblondestblonde]

The Clark Kent Effect

Part Three

AN: Imma be honest, I’m not happy with this part. I feel like my brain isn’t entirely ready for writing yet, it’s still wired to argue cases so please bear with me as I get my shit together. I still wanted to give the people who follow this story something though (you have no idea how happy I am about every single one of you) and I sincerely hope that this is good enough, apologies if not :) 

Song: Catching Feelings - Drax Project (this will be a thing from now on)

Word Count: 4,6k 

Warnings: explicit language I’m pretty sure but thats it

Masterlist / Part One / Part Two

You felt foolish really. It was as if your entire life had turned into a soap opera overnight. You wouldn’t call yourself cynical by all means, you loved love and everything that came along with it far too much for that, but you would’ve at least described yourself as rational.

Up until now.

Up until now you’d been convinced that if people really wanted to, they would be together. Up until now you’d been a believer of where there’s a will, there will be a way - relationships that would classify as statutory rape excluded of course, age was a bit more than just a number in those cases - but you, you, you had been stopped by the Bro-Code, which was just absolutely ridiculous.

Imagine telling that to your parents: Hey mom, so I met this great guy but I can’t do anything about it because he’s friends with my ex. Your grandma would straight up laugh in your face if you told her, the badass bitch had married her former lover’s rich best friend after she’d gotten the news that her fiancé hadn’t survived the war. Without needing to call her you knew that she’d tell you to go for Mat in a second, no matter how much she’d adored Tito back then.

But you weren’t your grandma and Tito hadn’t died in a war so here you were, pining over a guy you couldn’t have and practically living out a tragic romance novel. Technically you didn’t even know if Tito would have anything negative to say about the entire situation, it may all be water under the bridge by now, but you also couldn’t just casually ask him without giving anything away.

The only good thing about this situation was that Tito had brought a great group of people along with him into your life. He’d always been good at making friends, that certainly hadn’t changed from when he was younger and since the two of you had hit it up again your friend groups had seemingly merged without issue. It sure made for an interesting dynamic. You’d had some explaining to do whenever you initiated someone new into a group that also included your ex, but the result was definitely worth it.

Spending time with Tito was just as easy as it used to be, back before feelings complicated everything. Somehow you’d managed to fall back into a completely platonic relationship, one that worked just as well when the two of you were alone as it did with others around.

You’d missed having him around the years before, his view on things and the way he’d always managed to make decisions easy by providing simple solutions.

Should you get a puppy right now? - No, your apartment is too small for a big dog right now and no, you also shouldn’t settle for a purse-sized dog because you’ve always wanted a big one since you were little.

Maybe a cat instead? - No, you are allergic to cats, don’t be stupid.

What about one of those naked ones? - Also no, you need to bathe those frequently because of the built up oils on their skin and you don’t even have a bathtub in your apartment.

(You really had to bathe those from time to time, you’d looked it up. Apparently they could still trigger allergies as well, which straight up sucked.)

Should we grab Thai or Chinese? – Chinese, you told me about this new place you wanted to try out like three days ago.

What can I do to stop this one coworker from belittling and making fun of me? - I’ll help you make her jealous, how about some courtside seats to watch the Nets since she likes basketball?

The last idea had actually come from Mat (since Tito didn’t know shit about basketball), who had also pulled some strings to get four tickets so you could attend the game with Dana, Tito and him. Mat had even taken some pictures of Dana and you in your jerseys and at the game so you could post about your night excessively on your social media, making sure that said co-worker would see it. They’d also given you a tour of the building and you were surprised to say that their locker didn’t smell as bad as you’d expected.

Said coworker hadn’t said anything ever since by the way, but you could still see her lurking on your Instagram.

For all the advice Tito provided you with, you still hadn’t asked him the one thing you needed an answer to:

Is Mat off limits?

But you couldn’t do that and therefore it somehow became a normal thing for Mat and you to walk on eggshells around each other after the “incident” at the bar.

From time to time there were moments that made it blatantly obvious how good things could be – the time he’d excitedly side hugged-you after the Nets turned the game that one night before realizing what he’d just done and quickly letting go, how he’d found you in the crowd and looked straight at you after scoring a goal at one of his games before being swept away by his teammates or simply how you could see him looking around until he found you whenever your group met up – but they never lasted more than a few seconds.

The two of you were stuck, neither of you wanting to hurt Tito’s feelings. At least with your big group moments with Mat alone were rare. They still happened from time to time though, especially since the majority of your friends wasn’t even aware of your dilemma, which was why you found yourself in the passenger seat of his car on a Friday night.

Emily’s boyfriend Rafael had finally returned from a two-month-long work trip to Spain and was dead set on making an authentic recipe he’d been taught over there for everyone. Unfortunately he’d made the mistake of putting Emily in charge of getting the needed groceries and in true Emily fashion she’d forgotten to buy tomatoes. Something neither of them had noticed until Rafael had wanted to start cooking as soon as everyone arrived at their place. Maybe Emily had done it on purpose or maybe she hadn’t been thinking properly in that moment, too caught up in the fact that her lover was with her again, but she’d tasked Mat and you with a last-minute errand run to the store.

You couödn’t stop yourself from checking out the wine aisle though, leaving him waiting behind, dutifully holding a bag of fresh tomatoes and checking his phone while you inspected the options. Rafael had asked you to bring some wine as well but the one he’d requested was apparently out of stock.

“Barzal”, you called for his attention, inspecting a label to try and figure out if it was a suitable replacement, “you think Rafael would like this one?”

As you turned around with the bottle in your hand you were taken by surprise by Mat’s proximity. You hadn’t even noticed how close he’d moved until now and for a couple of seconds you were caught up in your daydreams again. He seemed to struggle with the same thing, his pupils blown and his breathing growing uneven while the two of you just stared at each other. His lips were so close and so incredibly inviting, his mouth slightly agape.

If I leaned up on my tippy toes right now I could-

You quickly stopped yourself from finishing that thought, looking down so you had a couple of seconds to gather your thoughts, thoughts Mat seemed to infiltrate constantly. By the time you dared to look up again he was running his hand across his face in frustration before slowly breathing out and returning to his cool and collected regular self.

“I’m the wrong person to ask this, he was drinking some red wine earlier and the one you picked out is obviously red but that’s about it. Wine culture is definitely lost on me, sorry. I prefer beer.”

“Stereotypical hockey player through and through, I see.” Later on you’d tell yourself that the smirk that followed made your brain short-circuit, because there was no other way to explain why you’d keep on flirting otherwise.

“Maybe one day I’ll teach you, only if you’re nice to me though”, you teased, maybe in an effort to take control over the situation, maybe because you simply couldn’t stop yourself but his laugh made your heart soar for one second, until you remembered why this shouldn’t be happening.

Maybe you simply were an undiscovered masochist because even though you knew you should stay away from him you kept finding yourself in situations like this one way too many times. Deciding that you’d simply drink the wine by yourself if anyone had an issue with it - drowning your sorrows seemed like a great idea either way right now - you handed him a second bottle before moving to leave the aisle and in turn his personal space.

Making eye contact with Colin standing a couple of meters away from you got you to do a full 180 though, almost smacking into Mat in the process, who had obviously followed you towards the cashiers.

What was it with Mat and you?!

While a collision was thankfully avoided, Colin’s presence could cause other problems, since he hadn’t exactly appreciated you breaking off things over a month ago. Because you hadn’t known him for long it had taken you longer than you liked to admit to realize that he was a manipulative bastard, you weren’t proud of that, and you had no idea how he’d act right now.

“What’s wrong?”

“My ex is over there and I don’t want to talk to him. Is he walking in our direction?”

Mat lifted his concerned glance from you to look over your shoulder so he could be on the lookout.

“If he’s the one wearing a Gucci hoodie that is so obviously fake then yes, he is walking in our direction.”

You let out a snort at the casual burn but you weren’t too happy about having to face Colin right now. He hadn’t even crossed your mind in these past few weeks but for him to cross paths with you while you were with Mat of all people seemed to be yet another one of these odd twists of fate your life seemed to attract lately. Maybe your guardian angel had decided to start a meth lab instead sometime recently, there was no other way to explain what was going on instead.

“Uh.. you look good, don’t worry, he’s definitely the one that missed out. Do- do you want me to pretend to be your boyfriend or something?”, Mat stuttered out nervously, probably noticing your anxious shifting and you couldn’t help but smile at his words, despite him being wrong about the reason behind your nervousness.

“Thanks for the offer”, you gave him a gentle smile of reassurance before continuing, “but no, it’s not about the way I look or anything like that, I don’t give a fuck what he thinks of me because he’s an idiot. I just don’t want him to cause any problems and if I could I’d just run away from him forever so he doesn’t have the chance to ever ruin my night again.”

“Well I’m no expert on forever, but I’m here right now and I say fuck that guy”, he responded and with that he grabbed your hand and started running towards the cashiers, leaving you with no other choice but to run along with him so he wouldn’t rip your arm out of its socket.

Oh how you wished you had a picture of the expression on Colin’s face as Mat and you ran past him, hand in hand and cackling like maniacs.

He was apparently too stunned to follow you as you fought over who would pay for the stuff - Mat ultimately winning - but you didn’t let that stop you from running all the way to this car as well. Of course hand in hand.

Masochist.

Somehow the weird tension between the two of you seemed to lift sometime during your little sprint but you weren’t sure if this would be permanent or if it was a spur of the moment thing. You’d be damned if you didn’t enjoy it while it lasted though.  

The entire ride back you couldn’t stop thinking about the way his hand had felt in yours and what a perfect fit it had been, desperately wanting to feel it again as the two of you sang along to the songs playing over the speakers, perfectly happy in your little bubble.

-

As Christmas approached Emily roped everyone in to accompany her on her mission to make Rafael appreciate the cold that taken over New York. According to her he dearly missed sunny Spain but all you could see was a man who was happy to be home again. You weren’t about to tell her that though, you’d long figured out that whenever she’d set her mind to something it was best to simply follow along. Everyone else had apparently come to the same realization because no one objected to her plans.

Emily wanted to take Rafael ice skating and since the Rockefeller Center apparently wasn’t good enough and too crowded, she told everyone to meet at Pier 17. Dana and Mariah were on board of course and you’d managed to convince Tito to come along, who had in turn invited Mat.

In a ridiculous attempt to not get spotted, both Mat and Tito had donned a pair of glasses and while you were used to seeing them on Tito by now, seeing Mat with them again knocked the breath out of your lungs for a second.

It had been almost two months since you’d last seen him like this and the fact that you hadn’t recognized him that night seemed impossible to you now. Maybe it was because you’d gotten to know him since, seeing him in real life instead of only on pictures and memorizing his handsome features in the process but as you tried to get a good glance at him without anyone noticing you realized that he’d never be Clark Kent to you again.

Whether that was a good or a bad thing was still left to decide though.

“Need help with those?”, Mat’s voice ripped you out of your thoughts. You’d been so lost in them that you hadn’t even noticed that everyone else had already laced up their skates and walked out onto the ice while you’d been staring at your hands for who knows how long, laces wrapped around your fingers but not doing anything. Tito and him had brought their own skates while everyone else had to rely on rentals and his were already laced up perfectly of course.

You nodded, despite full well knowing how to do it yourself but you weren’t about to stop Mat from pulling your leg into his lap so he had better access. Besides, you’d stupidly forgotten to bring gloves and you’d gladly take any chance to leave your hands stuffed inside the pockets of your jacket as you rapidly got colder.

His fingers worked quickly, tightening the laces with expertise and you watched his hand moving in awe.

If hockey ever wasn’t an option for him anymore, hand modeling definitely was. He had such nice hands, strong and big and perfect. For a quick second your thoughts drifted to what else they could be capable of, before you reeled them back in, mentally scolding yourself. It really wasn’t your fault, not thinking of him seemed impossible these days.

His eyes were mostly focused on his work but from time to time he’d lift his gaze and give you a small smile, one you happily returned despite the mess inside your head. He had just finished tying the second one when someone banged on the glass, making the both of you jump a little.

“Ayo Barzy get your filthy paws off Y/N!”, Tito yelled before zooming away again laughing loudly, leaving an awkward silence behind.

Was this just Tito being his usual little-shit-self or was he actually serious?

For a couple of seconds you couldn’t do anything but stare at Mat as he looked down onto his hands, one of them still loosely wrapped around your ankle. Carefully you pulled your leg off his lap, set both feet on the ground and got up.

It was apparently time to face reality again.

You waited until there was a break in the throngs of people circling around the rink before stepping onto the ice, muscle memory from your childhood kicking in immediately. Once you were convinced that you weren’t going to fall on your ass you did a couple of little spins until you were facing Mat again, who had followed you. He looked at you with a slack jaw and you laughed at his expression.

“You can skate?!”, he asked bewildered and you laughed again, moving so the both of you could skate beside each other at a relaxed pace.

“Obviously. Sorry to ruin your late night fantasies of teaching me how to skate but I’m a good Canadian girl and I did some figure skating when I was younger. I actually used to be pretty fast.”

That caught his attention and you smiled at the way he looked down at you with a conspiring grin.

“Oh yeah? Show me what you got then”, after a couple of seconds of contemplation he continued, “last one to reach the others owes the winner coffee.”

You looked around to find the rest of your group, spotting them on the other side messing around. Of course.

“You’re on, Barzy. I hope you’re ready to lose though”, you winked at him before racing towards your friends, leaving him and his exclamations about you being a cheater behind, now definitely not cold anymore.

-

Something in your relationship seemed to shift after that, at least whenever you were alone with him. Things were still difficult around others, especially with the way Emily kept prodding you for updates and Tito constantly disturbing the few moments you had alone with him. You weren’t sure yet if he did it on purpose or if he simply had awful timing but it wasn’t like it made a difference.

Christmas came and passed just as fast, the team leaving for a roadtrip shortly after. You’d celebrated New Year’s Eve with your friends in a club, unable to kiss the person you wanted to either way so your lips had stayed untouched as the fireworks went off at midnight and the days following.

Tito had announced that the guys would return later in the day though, already making plans in the groupchat to meet up tomorrow. While you wondered where he got all this energy from you suspected it was a way to distract himself as the trip hadn’t been successful - to put it mildly. In reality they’d ate shit, losing all of their games, some to teams that should have been an easy win.

It was hard to watch on TV but even harder to talk to the guys afterwards.

A couple of hours later you sat on the couch, a book in hand that you’d meant to read for weeks and enjoying staying in on a Friday for once. You were so lost in the story that it took you a couple of seconds to realize that someone had knocked on your door.

Who could that be?

Tito or Emily were most likely to show up unannounced at your day but you knew that Tito would be on his way to his home so he could sulk by himself and Emily was away on a ski trip with Rafael. Unwrapping yourself from your fuzzy blanket you padded towards the door, taken aback by who was waiting on the other side.

“What..”, you trailed of questionably, not even sure what you were going to say in the first place.

Mat looked so out of place in the dimly lit hallway, dressed in a suit that fit him so nicely, bag set on the ground next to him.

“Can I come in?”, was all he said and you nodded, unable to bring yourself to say anything else.

How could you even refuse him?

You didn’t move from your spot beside the door and after taking off his shoes he took a couple of steps inside your apartment, hanging up his coat before turning back around to face you.

“You’re probably wondering why I’m here but if I’m honest I can’t even tell you. I just didn’t want to be alone tonight and since you seem to constantly be on my mind either way..”, he trailed off, seemingly gathering his thoughts before continuing, “I don’t know if you watched the games or-“

“I did and you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to”, you said softly as you interrupted him, sensing his apprehension. You decided that you weren’t about to touch his admission of thinking of you all the time with a ten-foot-pole, instead focusing on the rest of his sentence. He looked so broken and lost standing there so you couldn’t help but take the few steps it took to reach him, wrapping your arms around him in a tight hug.

You knew from personal experience with Tito that athletes tended to take losses personal and if you had to take a guess you were pretty sure that Mat was one of those guys that blamed himself for them as well.

At first he seemed surprised about your bold move – it was the most the two of you had ever touched so far – but he quickly caught himself, hugging you even tighter to his body. For a couple of seconds you stood just like that, simply basking in each other’s proximity.

It was as if your bodies were made for each other, your head resting perfectly in the crook of his neck. Despite probably just getting off a plane he smelled so good and you were trying to figure out if you could take a deep breath without raising any suspicions. Before you’d managed to make a decision however, he pulled away and you unfortunately had to untangle yourself from him.

“Feel free to stay as long as you want to”, you said to fill the silence, leaving out the part where you hoped he’d stay for the night as well. He simply nodded before asking where he could change into more comfortable clothes. While you were sad to see the suit go you directed him to your bedroom, glad to have taken those thirty minutes earlier to tidy up.

He returned in a pair of grey sweatpants and a hoodie and it took every last remaining bit of your willpower not to drool at the sight of him. Somehow he managed to look even better in sweats than he did in his custom suit, which really wasn’t fair at all.

You had to admit it was a little weird to see him in your apartment though. He’d been over a couple of times to pregame etc. but he’d never been here alone. Somehow it felt strangely intimate to have him over by himself on this Friday night. To prevent your thoughts from going to a direction they definitely shouldn’t, you asked:

“Do you want some tea? I know technically you still owe me that coffee but I’ll be generous and let you off easy this time.”

For good measure you even threw in a wink at the end and your words had the desired effect, breaking the loaded tension completely.

“You cheated! I would’ve won if you hadn’t started early”, he exclaimed but the way he was laughing showed that he was anything but butthurt about the situation.

“Mmm keep telling yourself that, it’s okay”, you kept on teasing as he followed you into your small kitchen that was definitely at maximum capacity with two people in it. You’d be lying if you said that you didn’t enjoy the closeness the tight space prompted though.

With a steaming mug of tea the both of you settled onto your couch shortly after, also small enough to keep you close together. You’d been wanting to buy a bigger one for weeks, but right now you certainly didn’t mind its size.

Masochist.

“Oh I love that one, the chimpanzees are so cute”, Mat said to your surprise as he finally realized what was playing on your tv and you looked at him in utter disbelief. You certainly hadn’t pegged him for a guy that liked to watch nature documentaries but yet here he was, constantly surprising you.

“What? Documentaries are very soothing”, he defended himself and you had to laugh at the way he looked like a little kid with his floppy hair and the cute way his eyebrows had scrunched up.

“I know. That’s why I love watching them as well.”

You hadn’t exactly pictured yourself watching documentaries with him on a Friday night, something that felt way too domestic if you were being honest, but yet here you were.

As the hour grew later both Mat and you sunk further in the cushions and while you had no recollection of how exactly it had happened, your head apparently ended up on his shoulder somehow. Your only regret was that now it wasn’t as easy to sneak glances at him from time to time without him noticing. At one point he’d even wrapped his arm around you, moving both of you into a more comfortable position before covering your bodies with the fuzzy blanket and the steady rhythm of his heartbeat lulled you to sleep before you even knew it.

The soft sound of your name woke you up sometime later, you weren’t exactly sure how much time had passed but the credits of the second documentary you’d started were already rolling and you were pretty sure you’d only caught the first half of it. In your sleep you’d cuddled up even closer, your arm wrapped around Mat’s midriff and you quickly sat up, embarrassed about turning into a koala in your sleep. Maybe you could blame it on the documentary?

“Sorry for waking you but I should probably head home. Otherwise my back is going to kill me tomorrow.” His voice was a little hoarse and it was obvious that he’d fallen asleep as well, his hair now sticking up in multiple directions. You suppressed a giggle at the disheveled sight of him, instead appreciating that he let down his guard enough for you to see him that way.

“Yeah of course. I’ll show you out.”

“Thank you for tonight. It means a lot to me”, he said quietly as he stood by the door, ready to leave.

“Anytime Mat. Get home safe.” It was the first time you’d called him by his first name, after months of first calling him Barzal then Barzy and he must have noticed as well because his smile could probably make glaciers melt at this point. You weren’t even sure why you’d given up your pathetic way of distancing yourself from him – despite the fact that it was very much obvious that it wasn’t working – but to not call him Mat would feel wrong after this evening.

“Have a good night, Y/N”, he simply said, still smiling as he leaned down to kiss you on the forehead before walking out the door, leaving you speechless.

 -

Tagging: @jamiedrysdales​ @nazdaddy​ @itrocksmysocks​ @yeeehaw-hockey​ @whitesummerx​ @teenagekook​ 

[ohnoiyo-yoyle]

TPOT 1 SPOILERS!!!!!!!!!! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!!!!!!!!

So! First off, tpot was soooooo goood like oh my gosh I didn't expect it to be that good and the intro was SO well animated and the character interactions and just aaaaaaahhhhh!!! Okay, maybe I'm overhyping it a bit but that's just how I feel. TPOT reignited that spark for BFB that was starting to kinda fade for me. Since Battle for BFB is more comedy based and silly I was starting to get a little bored with it, so it's nice to finally get started on a more, I guess serious? show that focuses on character interactions/relationships and development/arcs and all that. But anyways, ONTO THE HIGHLIGHTS!!!

So time passes in the bfdi world the same way as it does in ours. Good to know

Happy Flower

2 is a cryptid confirmed. Always there, always watching

Oh!! The Yoyle Needy is like, fallen over. Along with part of the mountain

How did that happen???^^^

“It’s time for Cake at Stake!” “What?” “I SAID IT’S TIME FOR CAKE AT STAKE!!!” “Get them up for me Nickel!!” “Huh?”

WOO NEW CONTESTANT YESSSS!!!!

OH!! THE ORIGINAL CAKE AT STAKE INTRO IS BACK!!!

I will admit, I will miss the epic™ remix, but it’s also nice to be back with the original! Feels nostalgic!!

The doodles!!! Omg I love them!

THEYRE SO CUTE WHAT THE HECK THEY REMIND ME OF THE REQUEST DRAWINGS WHEN THEY SIGN STUFF

“Oh! Now I remember!” “Good for you” *pauses, looks at camera* “So-”

Purple tomato (toe-mah-o)

Pen being positive and cheering up the newbie

Thanking the voters: Speedrun Edition

“Looks like it’s curtains for......” “Looks like it’s curtains for....” Ō—Ō

“Don’t you trust me Clock?!” “Uh, of course NOT-” “Well prepare to get over it!”

Ah yes, my favorite: Cammy, Blendy, and Onigiri...y....

Pencil >:(

awwww Foldy misses him so much

OH NO TAPEY!!!! I VOTED FOR THEM :((((((

NOOOOO TAGGY NOOOOOOOOOO

Well at the very least Winner won. I’d rather have an actual character be in the game instead of, y’know, nonexisty?

MmM! Tasty

*GASP* PRIME NUMBER!?!?!!!

Anime expression activate =͟͟͞͞(ō_ō)

Waaaiiit a minute....are they gonna

“We’ll have to add someone instead!!” PLEASE DONT GIVE ME FALSE HOPE AND ADD NONEXISTY AMD THEN IGNORE THE CONTESTANT’S PROTESTS OF THERE STILL BEING AN UNEVEN AMOUNT OF PEOPLE JUST FOR THE SAKE OF A JOKE PLEASE DON’T

41 + 0 = 41 OH MY GOSH IT’S ACTUALLY GONNA HAPPEN THEY’RE ACTUALLY GONNA ADD TAGGY

YYEEEEEESSSSSS YEEEEESSSSS YEEEESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!! OMGOMGOMGOMG YEESSSS!!!! THEY ADDED THEM HSJFBSHAKGNFBJK!!!!

They have such a cool gimmick with their face being emoticons and text!!!

At first I thought that Price Tag was a girl and Winner was a boy (based on their voices) and thought “Oh cool! The gender balance stays even then!” But now I know that they’re both non-binary and I’m thinking “Oh cool! The gender balance still stays even AND there are two canon non-binary characters!!!

The bfb/tpot crew really be out here, continuing to give to the lgbt+ community and I am all for that

“I take back all the things I said about Winner while I was down there!” H-honey? What did you say???

“You do equal 1 right?” “I can if you want me to! :D” “*gulp* $1”

Well at least 2 isn’t like the previous hosts where they shove the eliminated contenders into a tiny cramped space and give them sometimes less than the bare necessities. These guys get to chill in what’s pretty much a nice hotel (tho they might be locked in)

“Cool! So you wanna stay on the same team? ‘:D” “No :)” “oh.. okay. :0”

Donut and BarfBag frienship solidarity

W.O.A.H BUNCH RETURN!!!!! W.O.A.H. BUNCH RETURN!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Who the egg is that?”

Oh??!!?!?? Loser backstory?!?!?! In THIS SHOW?!!?!? It’s more likely than you think

Chicken nuggets

Clock is a Loser stan

OH NOOO CAKE NOOOOO

YAYYY CAKE AND NAILY FRIENDSHIP!!!!!

GOLF BALL AND TENNIS BALL FRIENDSHIP!!!! AND SHE EVEN SAID SHE APPRECIATES HIM!!!! THATS SO SWEET!!!!!!

Ha. Balls (as in actual balls. Not whatever you’re thinkin about, ya nasties)

Yay Pen and Eraser friendship!!! They’re finally on the same team!!!

Either you prevent death, or you’re a murderer. There’s no in-between

“Did someone say h8ers?!!!” She sounds like a skater kid

Blocky is no longer with us. We shall miss him greatly

OH NOO BASKETBALL SHE DIDNT MEAN YOU Oh oh well i- there she goes I guess

Two moms and their son

So can they actually see those logo things or what??

Aww Rocky actually wants to be with them!!! And he’s taking initiative!! Way to go buddy!!!

Awww noo Book!!!! She’s trying her best but ultimately, they’re right!!! She needs to leave them be and get some new friends!!!!!

Please don’t tell me she’ll be the next Leafy. But so far she seems to be heading in the right direction

Uhhh Pillow?? What are you doing hun?

Yeah!! Clock and Icy alliance!!

Zigzag crew woo!!!

AWW NO LIGHTNING!!!

“Don’t worry Lightning! You have me!l “I don’t really..want you.” oooooh!!

Epic™

This just.....this ^^^

THEY’RE SO CUTE TOGETHER WTF I LIVE THIS FRIENDSHIP SO FAR

And there was even the little beeping cashier sound when Price Tag changed faces omg I love little details like that!!!

Snowball: Gets owned. Me, @ Naily and Price Tag: Good for them

NO! Marker!!!

Corporate needs you to find the difference between this picture and this picture: An egg and a ball.

Basketball: They’re the same picture

“I thought you were gonna collect me! Ha!” “Ha...haha......ha”

Cloudy’s secretly a kidnapper 0_0

DeathPact be ruining Bottle’s good time and she having non of that

Pillow doesn’t know how to read

The >:3 intensifies

She’s trying.....so hard...to make friends

Yay!! Lightning turning over a new leaf!!

“Well, I’m sure whoever it is, they’re gunna be just f-huueughh....,”

Continues in Part 2!! Which will be out sometime tomorrow cause these things take long to make

[atlasira]

i’m not done talking about this and need to vent. i’ve mostly seen it on the l*velink subreddit bc it’s much easier to see everyone’s matches (as you can put their sprites next to your username and there’s weekly discussion threads and etc.) on there than it is on here, and it’s so FRUSTRATING how everytime a match of color* has a white counterpart, players always always flock to the latter. it literally almost always happens!

(*by the way when i say “moc” in this post i’ll mostly be referring to the phrase “match of color” instead of its usual meaning of “men of color”)

between emmalyn or angel guess who people praise more. between noah and antoine. sam and micheal. skylar and jaden. keanu and blake. and so on and so forth. out of all these matches with characters of color who are mirrored by white characters, guess which ones out of the pairs get chosen and praised, while the other is left in the absolute dust?

this has been ongoing the entire time the l*velink sub was up and running, and of course there’s way more aggravating posts and content besides the one i’m about to talk about, but i saw this poll going around and even tho it’s a minor thing, it felt like just a cherry on top of what i’m talking about:

do you know why this specific poll is significant to my point? because both of the characters in it have counterparts of color. “who’s your favorite artist?” they ask, completely leaving out the artists of color. keanu and blake, and alex and calum are literally THE SAME PEOPLE. so why not do the so very simple task of just going “blake / keanu or alex / calum” with a slash in between counterparts? the motive for this was that either op felt keanu and alex were less liked by the sub (which is true bc of the reasons i’ve stated) and/or they felt they weren’t as relevant to be included (which also speaks to my point of people placing white matches as more significant/interesting than matches of color).

that poll is a very minor thing that wouldn’t normally deserve much attention. but like i said before, it’s just a cherry on top for me as the sub and general l*velink fanbase keeps positioning matches of color as less relevant than their white counterparts. whether it be in the uneven amount of fan content either pair gets (like posts, edits, memes, fics, or etc.), or in how absolutely imbalanced the excitement/discussion is when new matches are released and one is a moc while the other is white (god i remember when blake/keanu first came out people barely even muttered keanu’s fucking name and only went “oh thank god blake’s not the counterpart of franz! this’ll be easy 😋” since people thought they’d be counterparts instead of with keanu. so many so many people acted like keanu was so easy to just wave away and dispose of. it was genuinely disturbing to see how relieved everyone was that blake mirrored keanu bc it made the choice “so easy”.)

earlier i said most of this criticism stems from what i’ve seen on the l*velink sub because it’s much easier to see on there who everyone loves and is excited for bc of how interactive things are, and how easy it is to communicate to users en masse. but this is absolutely not saying that shit doesn’t happen here on tumblr too. the last time i made a post about smthg involving reddit and racism, it was spammed with people constantly saying “yikes at least tumblr isn’t like that ✨” as if tumblr is some safe space that never has fandom racism. regardless of the platform, racism especially in the form of microaggressions like this are everywhere. just bc it’s not as prominent doesn’t mean it’s nonexistent.

if you find that most or even all of your l*velink matches are white or white passing (and no, i don’t mean if you only just started the game and only have like 2 matches. i mean if you already have a decent number) then you need to think about why that is because that’s actually a huge issue. what is it about matches of color thats unappealing to you aside from their features? bc the stories are literally the exact same so it’s not that. “it’s just preference dont make this about race” bitch! having a preferred race is extremely racist. “i just didn’t like their counterparts *shrug* it’s not because they were characters of color” but that’s LITERALLY the only difference between them so what the fuck else could it be.

i’m not saying for everyone to now start choosing only the matches of color. but jesus christ if you find yourself constantly thinking the white matches are “more attractive” and see that most of the matches you’ve chosen are white, then you need to ask yourself “hey what the fuck” bc hey. what the fuck.

[lettrespromises]

> LettresPromises informs you : You have one notification.

> Letter object : The tamer of the flamboyant flames of passion.

> Todoroki Shouto sent you a letter, would you like to read it?

@mangosnakesandpeaches​ sent a letter :  ❝heyo! its aydudenoway, just moved to my writing account! request number 1/3 : okay okay, so ya know how people always tend to write like, dom shouto and sub reader? what about dom reader and sub shouto. like, damn as much as i like dom shouto, kinda want to see some dom reader nglll. could this be a drabble/imagine and not too too graphic NSFW? i hope this is okay! ahhh okay okay so idk if you started writing my request (dom reader) or not, but could i add onto it real quick? breathless Shouto is all im saying. im so sorryyy for this being so sudden! if you can't add it, thats okay!❞

author’s letter :  ❝dear @mangosnakesandpeaches​, thank you once more for trusting me with your ideas and letting me express through words the love i have for this man and this man only!! hot take but i do kind of feel you.... like.... shouto is low-key a sub to me (aside from pegging ofc.) anywhoopsies!!! i hope you’ll like this and i tried not to make it nsfw which was a bit confusing but?? nonetheless, i hope you’ll enjoy this promised letter.❞

Genre : Erotic but not explicit smut, fluff. (Please consider that the characters are aged up.) Warnings : Cursing, foreplay, innuendos, sexual deeds. Word count : 1.6K.

After personally handing crushing losses to many villains throughout the entire week, admiring the hint of a shy smile adorning the face of civilians torn by fear as a gleam of hope while they’re being saved, secretly glancing at the newfound scars worn as medals on the abused flesh of your skin when no one is looking, any hero would be mentally and physically drained, as if your body was just the host of vacuity. And rightfully so.

Thus came the ever so needed tradition of self-care with Shouto, this renaissance of an evening was held every Friday night ever since you both graduated from U.A. No word was needed, the sole acknowledged information of today’s date was enough for the both of you to understand that today had your name as a synonymous of self-care written all over it.

This context explains why you found yourself enveloped in Shouto’s embrace, a physical testimony of just how much he loved and cherished your presence, if you will. These oh so special Friday nights also drew a contrast with your everyday life as heroes, it was also the perfect opportunity to say (or paradoxically declare in a silent manner) just how much your presence was needed to one another as the cons of being a pro-hero weighed on your mind like the sword of Damocles. To put it more harshly, the inevitable curse of never knowing if the day you were bound to spend together would be the last represented said cons.

His arms found shelter on the area above your hipbones, and every time he would let his genetically given large palms roam on this area, he would always wonder if said area had been carved to fit perfectly the form of his hands— Shouto liked to think that perhaps this was yet another sign that you were meant to be, he always tried to find poetic parallels everywhere.

His thumbs were brushing invisible shapes on the flesh of your hips left bare by the intervention of Shouto’s hands, these brushes were anything but calculated, yes, they did respect a certain common pattern—  but each time they felt similar, they always felt new at once. The semi-random nature of his gestures were the living proof that the documentary being played on the TV was semi-interesting as well.

You, on the other one hand, were sheltered in Shouto’s warm and welcoming embrace, your head fit right in the crook of his neck, and as per usual, Todoroki found yet again another poetic parallel drawn by your jointed souls. Nonetheless, if Shouto’s stare was focused on the succession of bright lights radiating off of the TV, yours was laying on the personification of your source of happiness— your boyfriend himself. After all, wasn’t staring at him way more interesting than some documentary being played? Nothing could compare to some well-deserved ‘staring at Shouto session’, but said sessions came with the slight danger of being caught, oh well…

« Love, I believe you’re doing it again. » Shouto blurted out which made you unconsciously flinch in response.

« Doing what exactly, mhm? » Oh, the fake tone of innocence could have been heard from miles away, and it sure as hell didn’t go unknown under Shouto’s radar.

« You know what I’m hinting at— staring. » But this time, it was his turn to stare at you, it was a mutual game now.

« You’re saying that as if staring at you was illegal, I mean, looking this hot should totally be considered illegal. » Shouto’s blood rushed under your newly left comment, causing his cheeks to adopt a rosy tone.

« Y/N, I’m a pro-hero, I’m not quite sure I can be considered as a villain… Is looking a certain way truly illegal? Should I change something about my appearance? » His heterochromatic eyes found yours, and a certain desire for reassurance chimed in the way.

« Shouto, baby— of course not! You’re perfect the way you are, I was only messing around, you know? » His desire for reassurance fades away and instead, you are met with a gleam of content as you continue :

« What I meant to say was… You’re so handsome, so out of this world… » Each word leaving your lips and connecting to his eardrums was accompanied with the fitting gestures to emphasize just a bit more the comforting undertone of your speech. It all began with a swift shift of position— you were now sitting on Shouto’s lap, a crucial position which guaranteed you the upper hand of physical exchanges.

« You’re divine, Shouto… » The longer your eyes met his, the more you were secretly convinced that he was indeed out of this world, thus, you underlined this statement by tracing an invisible line from the corner of his lips to his jawline under his intrigued facial expression. An intrigued expression, perhaps, but he was begging to hear more.

« You’re have all the qualities one could dream of, don’t you? » This rhetorical question was signed with the manifestation of the presence of your lips upon the flesh of his neck, Shouto let out a gasp he ignored he was holding and tilted his head to give you more room to play with as an answer, longing for the next lines of your tirade. Instead, the soft pressures left by the pecks were replaced with biting motions, and interchanged with sucking motions at times. This newfound balance of pleasure on Shouto’s newly bruised skin was the cause of a chain reaction— first, his lips parted as if he was gasping for oxygen, he didn’t need it, it was more like a precautious deed than a clear remedy to something he needed; then, his lids closed shut, in anticipation of the bliss which was bound to course every inch of his body; eventually, a deadly sin named gluttony got the best of him and encouraged him to let his palms wander on your derrière. A bold action quickly reprimanded by a quick slapping motions on the back of his hands.

« No touching, got it? Keep your hands to yourself and maybe, just maybe I’ll reward you. » A sentence so embedded with delicious sin which became amplified under the spell of your whispers, right against the shell of his ears. There was no vocal response on his end, only a line of chills from the back of his neck to the bottom of his spine, sure, it wasn’t vocal, but it was such a sweet way to respond to the temptation.

This comment would be stating the obvious but you had the monopoly of the game, you controlled the fate of the protagonists and bent the rules your way— some would call it cheating, you’d call it having the world at your feet. An adventurous hand traveled underneath the fabric of Shouto’s shirt and, on its journey, felt the various kinds of reliefs sculpted on his body. The rock hard sensation of his abdomen against the soft flesh of your palm was one of the sweetest contrasts. Your hand followed a vertical path— first, a journey near his pectoral muscles, and a tragic fall to his growing bulge right beneath you, you couldn’t help but bow your lips into a grin which echoed to a thousand of hidden desires and beyond while Todoroki looked at you with pleading eyes.

« Aren’t you such a good boy to me? You did as I said, baby, keep going for me, yeah? » Shouto knew that the way you would pronounce each individual word was a hint to what was bound to happen, and the precise manner you moaned « good boy » near his eardrum was just a mere indicator amongst a myriad of them that you would not give up on your iron hold any time soon. Your lips eventually met his once more in a heated exchange, the advantage of the height played in your favor to assert dominance and set the done of the secret ballet between your tongues. Meanwhile, your palm was dangerously stroking the oh so growing bulge in Shouto’s underwear— and when your tongue would twist in a clockwise direction, your hand would do the opposite and vice-versa.

Shouto could feel you through all his senses— and although his lids were shut closed, this couldn’t prevent him from picturing your frame towering over him, he would always remember everything about you, even the most trivial details anyway. The gluttony in him cursed at him and screamed to touch you, but he knew better than to fall under the spell of his temptations. If he couldn’t manifest his pleasure physically, he could still do it orally— and thus a silent melody resonated in your mouth at the contact of your tongue with his. Said melody ended in the crescendo of the volume of his uneven breaths after breaking your kiss due to the lack of oxygen.

His cheeks were crimson red, his mouth was set agape to let fresh air fill his lungs again, his eyes echoed nothing but an irresistible paradox of pleading and will to continue further, his head felt dizzy under your sweet toxins which had just penetrated his mind… He was so addicted to you.

You let a smirk grow on your face in response to the aftermath of your antics, knowing very well that this was just a way to foreshadow what was bound to happen : « You’ve been so good to me, pretty boy, so, so good. Guess who’s going to have his reward now, baby? »

He knew he was going to get his reward, but at what cost?

[jatpbigbang]

Hi! I have a question on what happens if you have too many of one category of people for teams? What happens if there are more writers than artists or more cheerleaders than creators, do you kick the people that are too many out?

We are not kicking anybody out. We’ll try to make sure it all evens out, but in case the numbers end up too uneven, we will ask people that have signed up for two jobs to limit themselves. Eg. Should we have too many writers we will most likely ask people writing two fics to only do one. We feel that thats the most fair way and gives the most people a chance to participate.

[babyredriot]

‘You’re my bestfriend… how did I fall in love with you?’ I nee all the Sero fluff in the world

LITERALLY SO CUTE OKAY, sorry its so long i had so much fun writing this

You went to middle school with Kirishima and Mina. Meaning that you had known them for a while now. Even though you had known them, you came into UA with an open mind and making new friends and meeting new people. Your class was an uneven number so when you found your seat wedged in between Bakugo and MIdoriya you were afraid of how you would make new friends. Midoriya seemed very kind, but anytime Bakugo slightly turned his head to give him a distasteful look, he would silence himself immediately and not talk to you for the rest of the day.

Around the third day of being at UA you were really giving up on finding any new friends at all, and just maintaining your friendships with Mina and Kirishima; when the boy who had been sitting next to you turned in his chair. He smiled at you with incredibly straight teeth and began to make jokes on how you never got to talk to anyone due to the person in front of you being such a menace. You found yourself lighting up immediately and joining in on his poking fun at Bakugo. You two laughed as Kirishima joined in, sitting next to Sero, which only enraged Bakugo more. From that day forth, people always knew wherever one of you were to go, the other would be quick to follow.

Your feelings of trust and care grew for each other even more after the USJ incident. Sero was left at the main entrance as you were transported to another area with Bakugo and Kirishima. The entire time as you were fighting villains all you could think about was how he was doing, and if he was okay. Needless to say, you were relieved when you saw him after everything was over with.

You ran towards him when you saw him with all of the energy that was left in your body. He was okay, no one had hurt him and he was still standing. Thats all you needed to know about today, right now nothing else mattered. He tightened his arms around you once you made contact with his body. He let his head fall against your shoulder and held you like you may break.

“I was so worried about you.” He said while bunching his hands in the back of your costume. You grasped onto his back and held him close.

“I know, me too.” You said into your shoulder.

“Hey! Soy Sauce Face!” You heard Bakugo’s voice ring out above everyone else’s. You turned around looking at him as he looked over you at Sero.

“Take care of your girl, she couldn’t stop muttering about how she just needed to find you over and over, it was super annoying.” He said while crossing his arms. Sero smiled and said something along the lines about how Bakugo was lucky that you were with him. To which Bakugo got the same pissed off look in his eyes which you two were so used to seeing at this point, and began to yell. Luckily after today, he did have more of a respect for you, so you and your friend were able to run away.

As time progressed the more you two learned about each other the more comfortable everything became. You started out the year being friends and had grown into a bond that would never break no matter what. Atleast that’s what you hoped as you stood outside of Sero’s room. He had become your bestfriend, your number one confidant and the only person that you were 100% yourself around at all times of the day. You had worked together through many different tasks throughout the two and a half years of knowing each other and found that there was no one else that you would want to work with. You were in your third year now, and you felt like today may be the only time you would have enough courage to finally tell him how you truly felt.

Over the last few years you had found yourself knowing Sero like the back of your hand. He started off as being your closest friend and then became your best friend, but it grew into something more for you. Unlike Kirishima, your affection for Sero never grew into a brotherly love. It simply just turned into love. You found yourself engulfed by the feelings more often than not anymore, and you thought he was starting to notice. Everyone already had in your close friend group. Hell even Kaminari had pulled you aside to ask you about it.

“SooOOOoo how’s your day?” You had asked him.

“Do you like Sero!?” He asked looking at you with those excitable eyes. You choked on the water you were drinking at the time. He patted your back and looked at you with curious eyes.

“I mean yeah he’s my best friend,” You told him looking anywhere but his eyes. He rolled his own and stopped the conversation moving on to the next subject tat caught his interest, seeing that you weren’t going to confirm your feelings for him anytime soon.

You were brought back to the present as someone shoved your shoulder lightly. “Well Baka! Are you going to go in? They’re all waiting!” Bakugo said while looking down at you. You stuttered as he pulled the door open revealing that Sero wasn’t alone. The whole group was there to your dismay. With final exams coming up and all of you moving on to the bigger parts of your lives, you had forgotten that tonight all of you were hanging out just you six. Being a school night Bakugo refused to let anyone drink so it seemed that reminiscing on old times would just have to do.

“Y/N!” Sero cried looking up at you with bright eyes and the smile that could make your heart stop. He had such beautiful smile, eyes, hair, face, arm- “Are you going to come inside orrrr?” He said looking at you with a teasing hint in his eyes now. You smiled, knowing that now was not the right time to tell him and barged into the room to have a good night with your friends- and crush.

“Okay, that was a good one but!” You screamed out “Do you remember when Sero and Kaminari had a battle on who could get the microwave to start from the furthest point?” The room filled with laughter as the scene came back into all of your minds.

“Of course I do!” Sero cried, “I still want a rematch! You cheated and you know it! If I knew we were allowed to use quirks then I wouldn’t have even gotten into the bet with you!” He threw his arms up into the air exasperatedly as Kaminari cackled across the room. You looked around at your closest friends and wish that nothing would ever change. The people you were the most close to were in this room. You hoped they would always be as close with you as they were now. Your eyes trailed over to Sero who was in a now heated arguement with Kaminari. You observed the way that his cheeks moved anytime he laughed, or how his forehead would scrunch the slightest bit anytime he would get frustrated with something Kaminari would say. Little to your knowing, everyone but Sero was watching you admire the boy and slowly they all made eye contact with each other, getting the same idea in their heads.

‘Well, would you look at the time” Kirishima said, faking a yawn. “I really should go to sleep since we have that extensive training tomorrow and all, right Bakugo?”

“Wha- Oh, sure.”

“Yeah I should go to sleep too, I’m going to need to get my sleep schedule back in track for when I’m a kick-ass sidekick!” Mina said winking your way. You were lost at first, seeing as how it was only 9:30, until that wink. You felt your whole face heat up as you knew what your friends were doing. Those b*tches were setting you up!

“Are you sure you have to go to bed?” You asked grinding your teeth together looking at Kaminari with pitiful eyes. “You normally stay up so much later than this!” He smiled at you wickedly.

“Nah, I really should be off, need to get that good rest and all if I’m going to kick your ass tomorrow in training.”

You felt absolutely betrayed as your friends filed out of the room one by one, each giving you a look of ‘NOW DO IT NOW’, which made you feel even more horrified. Sero looked absolutely dumbfounded on why his room was packed with his friends two minutes ago and now it was just you and him sitting on your bed. He brushed it off soon enough though and turned to you, looking at you with his dark eyes.

“So, now that the peanut gallery is gone, remember when it was just you and me against the world?” He asked reaching out to grasp your hand in his own. This was nothing new for you two seeing as how being best-friends both of you often turned to one another for physical comfort. Your heart still spiked at his contact though, as you nodded your head at his question.

“Those were the good old days. When we didn’t have to worry about Kaminari getting beaten up by a pack of girls because of something Mineta dragged him into. Or when we could make fun of Kirishima about his manliness without him having to go on a full Red-Riot rant towards us about chivalry.” You said looking up at him you smile growing at the memories. “You’ve always been my other half Sero.” You say waiting for the right time to tell him how you felt.

At those words something seemed to ignite within him. He straightened his back and looked at you with a more serious gaze. You were confused, did you say something wrong, was he hurt by something you said? He seemed… nervous?

“You know Y/N, since the day I reached over to talk to you, seeing as how you were pathetically going to spend your whole UA career in silence if I didn’t,” You shoved his shoulder and laughed as he teased you, “I’ve always known that I was going to get something great out of our relationship. You mean the world to me and then some, you truly have become my bestfriend.” He paused his own words and seemed to collect himself. You watched him inquisitively, wondering where he was going with this. Finally, he took a deep breath and looked down at you. “I keep thinking about when it happened and really I can’t seem to differentiate, from a time when it was and when it wasn’t. It seems like I always kind of knew but never really had the capacity to realize it. It s a question thats been racking my mind for years now and I kept constantly asking myself over and over, You’re my bestfriend…. How did I fall in love with you?” He looked down at your hands which were grasped together in their embrace.

You felt your words you wanted to say stuck in your throat. He said it. He had finally broken the barrier both of you had been dancing around now for years. There was no more denying how you felt for one another. He meant the world to you and you him. Sero seemed to be waiting for an answer as he anxiously drew circles into the skin on your hand. You grabbed his face and lifted it to have his eyes meet yours. 

“Sero...” You said your eyes flickering down to his lips. “I’ve loved you ever since the day I thought I could lose you. The thought of losing you so early, when we had had no time to get to know each other like we do now, was the worst feeling ever. What I said is still true, you're my other half, a-a-and I love you.” You said nervously fidgeting with the hair that had fallen in between his face and your hand. He reached his hand up to grab your own on his face and stilled it, looking at you deep in your eyes. It felt like he could read every single emotion that you were feeling. With how well he knew you, he probably could. He leaned down to touch his forehead to yours. 

“Y/N..” He said trailing off to look at you.

“Just kiss me already idiot.” You said laughing softly. So, he did kiss you. He reached behind your head to lace his fingers within your hair and pulled you close. There was a moment of hesitation between you two before your lips touched, knowing everything was about to change the second that this happened. 

Then, he kissed you. His lips were so warm against your own. You sighed into the kiss and leaned into the dance that you two were creating, You felt so whole, and happy. As good of a friend as he was, he was an even better kisser. He leaned you back into his bed and liften his head back up. He stared down at your eyes and brushed your hair out of your eyes. 

“HEY! EXTRAS! HAVE YOU GUYS MADE OUT YET?!” Bakugo yelled past the door and you suddenly became very aware that your friends were never the type to not snoop. Sero chuckled at the sight of your blushing face and reached down to brush the pad of his thumb across your pink cheeks. 

“You’re so beautiful... but.. I think we need to let our friends back in before a certain acid related one burns my door down.” He said while begrudgingly standing up. You didn't mind that much. You knew that he would be your best friend for the rest of your life, and that you would have more than enough time to find all new avenues of your relationship. 

[darker--serenity-blog]

The Dark Dwindling Decent of One Davina Gerard.

[Sitting beneath the large statue that stares itself into the ocean, small wisps of hair begun to flicker across her face. At one point she wanted to cut it all off, shed the hair and just go short enough for a ponytail when it would be needed. The glamour spell she had done for halloween had proved her thoughts true to herself. 

But she knew it would make her aggravated if she did actually cut it. 

Maybe it was just a cover for something else. No. No one changes their physical appearance as a way to escape mental issues. That's not a thing. 

She tugged at the earbud that was wedged into her ear, and it popped out to reveal the sounds that she had been missing. 

Waves crashing softly,people all behind her, roaming the streets despite the need to stay inside and take care of themselves. 

Maybe humans aren't the apex species they all believed. Maybe if they did the research on their own history people wouldn't be roaming around making jokes of such a threat. 

But then again- had she stayed within her own lane of normal, maybe she would be out with friends, maybe dancing, trying to forget that death lurks in every crease and shadow of the world. 

The thoughts swirled and cascaded down deeper into her mind until finally, a almost shriek from behind her caught her off guard, and she shifted slightly, eyes falling onto a couple of friends walking down the road, laughing and making jokes amongst themselves. 

They're wild. 

Such an odd thought process for it, but think, they're fragile, like snowflakes, yet they dance on top of the wood burning flames, in a small hope they can make it to the other side in an unharmed fully in tack way. 

I could eat them. 

Blinking as the words sprawled across her brain like it was a basketball game and the scoreboard worker made a slight typo, she shook her head softly. 

Just because I could doesn't mean I should. But then again, every day is a roll of the dice for the lot walking not even thirty foot from her now, she shifted again, bringing her legs underneath her to stand up slightly, still thankful for the full fledged statue keeping her hidden from them. She inhaled softly, and her head tilted, one of them was wearing one of her favorite scents. 

Which, thinking on it, was probably everyone's favorite scent at one point or another- Warm Vanilla Sugar-. She paused,finding herself in an almost pouncing stance before she huffed some air through her teeth and turned back towards the water, dropping onto her ass with a soft force to zone her back away from the loud drinkers. 

Gently rubbing her hands around the sweaters end, which has eroded over the past existence, wearing down from the anxiety tugging inside of her brain, it had twisted the fabric and pulled this way and that until it finally began to snap, pulling itself apart at the seems and revealing uneven dashes of fabric protruding from the outskirts of her finger tipped length maroon comfort. 

Almost like her brain- in its own way, coming back had left her in a pile of memories and confusing moments that didn't even try to organize themselves back onto the memory shelves in her brain. They just laid sprawled out in an endless labyrinth of moments. 

It wasn't too bad- in a twisted comforting sort of way, she didn't have things to stress or freak out over, quod fit, fit.

Latin- what happens, happens. 

The weird tingle feeling that rested in her chest gave her the momentary thought that not everyone is like this when they think, most people have to have two sides of a conversation, but not a third part, a genuine part that couldn't care less of the events that occured. 

But, not knowing what could happen, or when something could happen gives a reason to freak out. 

She'd been staring into the water long enough her eyes blended lazily the scenery and surroundings that traced her exterior. The streets hadn't cleared either, when the sun fully dives into the deepest part of the other side, its almost like clicking on the "we're open" sign across the city. Normally, she would just get lost in her own mind, staring, over thinking, and under breathing. But not even under breathing can help with the sea of voices, noises, and smells that began to assault her. 

Building her house had been an experience she never knew she needed, but it was finally done- all except for decor and furniture, which additional help from a young Gilbert would make it easier. The beginning of whatever they were at this point had been such a gut shifting little event that honestly, she couldn't understand why they weren't constantly trying to murder each other. Or jump each other. Oops. 

She really needed to try and figure out how to introduce him to her family in a safe and cautious manor. Maybe wait a little bit for everyone and everything to chill out. 

The thought brings a violent laugh to her lips, and she almost doubles over. 

God she's in deep shit with that one, but - n her defense-

Yeah she's got nothing. 

Rubbing a cold hand down her face to almost physically ground herself she shook her head, and decided to wait this night out here, freezing herself in a mental state over too many thoughts, luckily there was no heart rush to give her anxiety about it all, sadly there is no heart rush to help the numbness that stabbed her fingertips and the top of her legs through her pants. 

She might /actually/ freeze out here. 

Wouldn't that be almost comical. She pulled herself up slowly, and began to gently shake out her arms, pushing the blood around in an awkward attempt to rid herself of the tingling numbness that made no sense to call it "sleeping"- when arms went like this- or legs, it was a more close to death feeling over a tired and asleep sensation. 

But thats another time. Maybe not. Huffing softly she pulled the hood over her hair and began a slow but casual walk back to the outskirts, back to her house that hid away from all the inanities that the city holds within its lines. So much had happened, and /was still/ happening. But she couldn't wrap her brain around it long enough to begin processing what it all was. 

It was horrible really, the fact that she wasn't already offering to help, or finding a way to. No wonder no one really trusted her right now, she didn't recognize herself lately, and maybe trying to go back to the way she was wasn't possible. 

She kicked at a loose stone softly, not really putting enough effort to launch it, just to toy with it as it led her way down the road. Following the piece of stone with her eyes as well as her legs, she finally found herself turning onto the horribly cared for road outside of the city, she paused and lifted her head, blurred eyes scanning around. She had just been walking, no thoughts clouding, no ideas forming, just walking. It had gone faster than she prepared for, and before she knew it, her hand was twisting the door knob, pushing the door open slowly, she was alone tonight, which oddly enough was weird in a little amount. She needed someone else here honestly. 

 

Letting her jacket fall, she tossed it to the side of the couch, and dropped herself on a soft cushion, reaching down to unlace her boots, slowly and carelessly, her fingers were fucking cold. 

Finally kicking the hard boots off, she made her way to the thermostat, and rolled her eyes at the digital numbers, no way in all of life is it actually 74 degrees in this house. She dialed it up, all the way to 78 before she felt it would do good. 

She turned on the balls of her feet, and almost skipped to the kitchen, reaching into the fridge to her thermos without question before turning again, and moving herself upstairs, the creaking of the stairs raised the small hairs on her arms and she made a mental note it was probably better to stop shaving her arms for the winter. 

Pausing, she tilted her head slightly to one side, closing her eyes to listen around for a brief moment, after a solid moment of pure silence she softly sighed, and began back up the stairs. The thing with absolute silence is that it can be the loudest noise anyone ever has the sad truth of experiencing. The second she was within reach of the TV remote in her bedroom, she clicked on unsolved mysteries and sat at the edge of her bed, letting the sounds of other peoples tragedies drown over the white noise of the air. 

-_-_-_-_-_-__-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Thibodaux

[wellnesscard]

dream of my nap was i was in the parking lot in front of my friends apartment and a truck comes ricocheting thru up the road into the lot almost flipping itself by hitting the uneven snow tracts (just how parking lots in this town be no lie) . an old man 60 yearsor so 7ft tall comes out of the truck trying to yell something i knew right away he was trying to get the words 9-1-1 out . he was clutching his chest hobbling at high speeds towards me n my two anonymous friends i was standing with. i walkedtowards him getting my phone out asking sir i am going to call you an ambulance are you alright. i dialed the number he kept walking along i followed after him asking him to sit down then he had a bob twin peaks moment and grabbed me by both my shoulders dragging me away running off with me trying to take me somewhere. i shook myself loose and ran back to my girlfriends still with my phone dialed to 9-1-1 the medical attention was on its way . i was shaken. someone called me a few minutes later and i told them what had just happened they said very nonemotionally yeah thats so-and-so you have to watch out for him and i said i can see why

[hearts-upon-our-sleeves]

Astraphobia - Part 2

Series Masterlist

Title: Astraphobia

Pairing: Mob!Tom Holland x Gardener!Reader with Astraphobia

Word Count: 1.5k

Warnings: Cursing, mentions of sexual acts, illegal activities, murder, alcohol, panic attacks.

Summary: Astraphobia, also known as astrapophobia, brontophobia, keraunophobia, or tonitrophobia is an abnormal fear of thunder and lightning, a type of specific phobia. It is a treatable phobia that both humans and animals can develop. -Wikipedia

Chapter Summary: It rains unexpectedly and you have no one else.

A/N: This switches between Tom and You bc i want both sides told? Idk but I like it. Also super bad panic attack so ik it’s in the warning but heres a second warning.

 Your chest was heavy, your lungs filled with fire as it tightened and loosened. Your fingers traced down your chest clutching your top, the coolness of your fingers and the fire of your chest met and left traces along your skin. Tears escaped your eyes as you shook leaving stains along your skin, your arms were around your knees hugging your chest as if there was nothing else in the world to hold. Your ears were pounding from the blood flow, and your eyes were blurred as the tears stung them like bees. Pins and needles traveled through your legs as you gripped them harder.

It wasn’t supposed to be today, you’d read the news it said no rain for the next week. Yet here you were sat in your shop trembling in fear of the monster storm outside. You tried breathing exercises but nothing had been helping, so you stuck your fingers in your ears and you sat and cried trying to get over the strikes you heard outside.

“T-trees are the longest living organisms on earth. Plants can feel, smell, and remember.” You repeated facts to yourself to distract yourself, and the only thing you could recite by heart were plant facts. Your fingers remained planted in your ears as you rocked back and forth praying that this storm would end soon.  

---

“Where the fuck is my money Holmes? Because all I see here is you buying brand new cars yet not being able to pay me back. You know what that’ll get you? A fucking bullet through your sad little brain.” Tom said as he pulled a gun from his desk drawer and aimed it in between  Holmes brows. Tom saw the man flinch and soon he was on his knees begging for his life.

“Get up, you’re pathetic.” Tom moved his gun upwards and soon the man followed. Tom went to pull the trigger when a strike of lightning boomed through the cold office and for a second he thought back two weeks to the thought of you. He thought about you and how you’d see his lifestyle, and lowered the gun. Tom rolled his eyes and pointed to the door.

“I want the money by noon tomorrow or i’ll make sure you go down straight to hell.” Tom boomed as the man thanked him and rushed out of the door. Tom sat down in his chair and put his gun own questioning why he didn’t kill him. Then he thought to you and why when he thought of you he turned soft. He needed to get you out if his head, why should he go after a girl who clearly hated him, but why did look back at the time you patched him up after a fight and smile. How you looked him in the eyes that night and asked if he was ok. How the peroxide burned yet all he could think about was you touching him. Tom looked to the window, you probably loved storms, he thought you’d enjoy not having to water your plants, how you’d stare at the storm and feel relaxed. But that’s just what he thought and he needed to stop, he needed to stop thinking about you, even though you were a ray of light in the darkest storm.

Tom was still lost in thought when Harrison walked in. Harrison fully expected to walk in to see a dead man on the floor not his best mate staring out the window lost in thought.

“Mate what the hell? I thought you’d finish that bloke he was an ass.” Harrison shook Tom out of his trance. The brunette looked over to his mate with a huff and a smirk.

“Wasn’t worth a bullet.” Tom shrugged and sat at his desk pulling up the money he had just been sent.

“Yeah,” Harrison paused with a smile, “I don’t think it’s that.”

“What are you on about this time?” Tom groaned and leaned back into his chair as Harrison sat on the desk.

“You are hung up over that flower shop girl aren’t you?” Harrison laughed as Tom scoffed. Tom rolled his eyes, blew a piece of hair out of his face and smiled with thoughts of you. “How long have you even known her? Have you had an actual conversation other than her telling you to fuck off when you try to buy her shop?”

Tom thought for a moment. You two had known of each other for two years, he still remembers the first time he walked in. You were picking flowers for an old ladies bouquet. Tom still remembers the smile you gave when the lady left and he could’ve sworn that’s when he fell for you. Tom was still in his head when Harrison slapped his shoulder earning a punch to his stomach in return. “Mate? The hell?” Tom called as Harrison laughed and clutched his stomach.

“You need to stop thinking about her, she's making you soft and you can’t be soft mate. Come on get dressed lets go get some drinks and you a pretty looking girl for the night.” Harrison called as he walked out of Tom’s office, and Tom agreed, he did need to stop thinking about you. It was only going to be business, he needed your shop and he was going to get it.

---

The storm died down but that didn’t stop the fear rushing through your body. Your deep breathing turned to panting and all you saw was a white blur, you could taste the metallic taste of blood from you biting you inner cheek, and all you could hear was the pounding and rushing of blood in your ears.

You were on the verge of passing out and you knew you needed help. All of your family was hours away, and no one else had a key to your shop. Holy fuck you were going to have to ask Tom weren’t you? He had picked your lock two weeks ago and knew the lay out so he would understand if you said you were under the desk. The last time you called the hospital for help they charged you way more than you had and you were still paying the bill. You hated Tom, he wouldn’t come or even give a shit, all he wanted was your shop, there was no way he’d give a shit you were on the floor having the worst panic attack of your life.

“Calling him would be better than dying.” Your mind screamed. So with shaking hands you pulled out your phone and clicked on the icon, he’d given you his number in case you wanted to take on the offer of him buying his shop. You clicked on the call button and prayed you wouldn’t die.

---

Tom had been chatting up some blonde at one of the clubs he’d owned. She was pretty but nothing compared to you, Tom thought but ignored it, you’d never be his nor would you ever need him. Tom looked over to Harrison, he was knocking it off with every woman he set eyes on. Tom was about to knock another drink down when his phone buzzed in his pocket. Who ever called him was going to get it, the rule is to never call him when he’s clubbing or you die.  It was an unknown number and he almost felt sorry for the poor schmuck who called him.

“Who the fuck is this?” Tom boomed into his phone but all he heard were soft cries and uneven breathing.

“T-tom-m.” Was all you were able to muster out but he instantly knew who it was and every ounce of worry ran through his body. He exited the club extremely fast, if you were hurt he’d kill any sorry son of a bitch who dared to even look at you.

“Hey love you gotta tell me where you are. I’ll be there ok are you hurt?” Tom walking in any direction he could trying to find you, he noticed your breathing was almost non existent.

“S-s-shop.” You dropped your phone and Tom started yelling in his, you couldn’t hold it up anymore. You started heaving and you knew if you didn’t calm down, you were going to pass out.  

It didn’t take Tom long to run to your shop. He picked the lock as if it was the easiest thing in the world and called out your name running around looking for you until he hit the desk. He looked under it and saw you, you were hugging your knees tears permanently stained your face. Tom crawled under the desk and you instantly gripped onto him.

“Love you gotta tell me what happened.” Tom whispered loud enough for you to hear, but you didn’t need to tell him a thing, because at that instant the storm continued and the loudest strike rolled through and Tom knew when you screamed in horror. So he held you close and whispered sweet things in your ear to keep your mind off the monster outside, and for once you felt at home during a storm, right in Tom’s arms.

[memoriesthatkeepyounear]

150 Random Questions

1.) What’s better, having high expectations or having low expectations?

 Low lmao

2.) Would you rather go without junk food for a year or go without TV for a year?

 junk food

3.) Describe your perfect man/woman.

Tall, funny, weird, silly,serious,optimistic,driven,adventuous, list goes on

4.) Thoughts on school dress codes?

they’re honestly stupid and degrading but some are necessary

5.)Any strange phobias?

Not that i can think of

6.) At what job do you see Donald Trump best fit?

6 feet underground 

7.) Who was your first crush?

NIck Jonas lmao

8.) Who was your first best friend?

Girl named Morgan don’t remember her last name.

9.)What is one weird thing about you?

I hate when I have an uneven amount of tattoos.

10.) Top 5 TV shows you like to watch?

11.) What are your favorite boys names? Degrassi, Greys Anatomy,TVD,Black Mirror

12.) What are your favorite girls names? Marley,Tasha idk i dont really have any lol

13.) Do you have any tattoos? If so, what are they? Yes, there’s too many to name each one lmao

14.) Do you plan on getting (more) tattoos? If so, what do you want to get as of the moment? yes many mor, next one is an alien head with a space ship and UFO.

15.) Do you have any piercings? Do you plan on getting more? i mean just my ears and eh maybe

16.) Do you like hugging people?

eh i could live without hugs tbh lol

17.) Think of ANY person on earth right now.  Who did you think of? you don’t want to know (CB)

18.) Do you have an iPhone? yes iphone 8 plus

19.) What is the worst thing that could happen in your life right now? losing one of my jobs lmao

20.) Do you watch anime? no

21.) What brings true happiness? music,traveling,friends,concerts.

22.) What is the most expensive thing you’ve ever paid for? honestly, i dont know i dont remember

23.) If you could have any job in the world and get paid millions of dollars a year for it, what would you be and why? tour manager or selling merch for a band

24.) Do you want children? If so, how many? honestly no but if i had to have children probably 1 or 2

25.) Name and describe someone who you feel most comfortable around. I’ll just name them, Pape, Chase, Michele, Destany,Chris,  Zion, Mary,Tori, Alyssa

26.)If you could invent a holiday, what would it be? Corbyn Besson Day just because LMAO

27.)Would you rather have summer weather or winter weather all year round? This isn’t a choice but spring weather

28.) If you could make an alien race, describe what they would look like. they would look like an alien racing, obviously.

29.)  What was the first thing you learned to cook? Grilled Cheese

30.) Describe your sense of humor. I’m funny as fuuuuck. I’ll send memes, stupid random shit i can think if, anything.

31.) What is the key to happiness? Surrounding yourself with positivity, and trying to find the positive out of anything negative that happens. Not worrying what other people think of you except yourself. Surrounding yourself with good people

32.) How many phone numbers do you have committed to memory? Whose numbers are they? One of my sisters, both my parents, thats about it lmao

33.) Name three songs that make you want to dance. Dazed adn Confused-Jake Miller, Mojo-Round2Crew,something different-wdw

34.) What job did you want to have as a child? Vet Technician

35.) Do you have any talents or skills? My talent is getting all the rings in the ring game on toontown

36.) What was the worst punishment you’ve ever had? I got grounded for a month-dont remember what i did tho

37.) Did you ever do anything weird as a child? Oh im sure i did.

38.) What is your dream car? a car that doesn’t break down

39.)  Describe something that made you laugh this week. probably something corbyn did or sue or my friends

40.) Did you have a dream last night? If so, describe it. Yes and i”d rather not lmao

41.)  Do you ever have repetitive dreams? Describe it/them. oh yes and u don’t want to hear that either

42.) Describe the worst/ scariest dream you’ve ever had. I’ll always remember this--I was younger maybe like 11 and it was that my dad went psychotic and my sisters and her friends snuck outside and tried to get away but he found us, threw us in his car and had my neighbors at the time help him kill us idk bro it was wild. thats the short version.

43.) Describe the best dream you’ve ever had. there’s so many and no thank you

44.) If God himself gave you a choice of either having unlimited money for the rest of your life or finding your one true love starting tomorrow, which one would you choose (keep in mind, you are still able to make a ton of money if you choose love, and you are still able to meet your soul mate if you choose money)? probably finding my one true love-thats worth more than any amount of money

45.) If you could do anything (and I mean ANYTHING) right now without consequences, what would you do and why? honestly i dont know

46.) Do you have any recipes that you know off the top of your head? What is it/ what are they? yes, how to make whipped cream lmao 

47.) Do you have your license? If so, do you have a car? no

48.) Have you ever had a near death experience? yes

49.) Do you personally know anyone that has been to prison? yes

50.) Have you ever been in a physical fight?

yes.

51.) When you get out of the shower, do you towel dry, blow dry, or air dry your hair? depends, if im not leaving the house i towel dry and then air dry but if i have to look good i blow dry.

52.) When you go to the movies, what snacks and drinks do you take with you? candy, popcorn, soda or an icee

53.) Do you like going to the beach? If so, do you like to stay dry or go in the water? If not, why? i like goigng to the beach adn going in the water, i hate sand

54.) Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?

sometimes.

55.) If you could have a superpower ASIDE from being invisible or being able to fly, what would you have? reading minds.

56.) If you were able to live for however long you wanted to (i’m talking thousands of years without aging), when would you choose to die? in this moment tomorrow lmao

57.) What do you think happens after you die? the light you go into is really the light when ur leaving the womb and your soul goes into a baby just beig born

58.) Do you believe in aliens? yes

59.) Do you believe in ghosts? yes

60.) Do you believe in spiritual things like ouija boards, tarot cards, and crystals? Do you believe they are portals for evil entities to enter the mortal world? yes

61.) If you could make one mythical being real, who/what would you make?

i dont know

62.) Do you get tan, or do you burn? the first time i tan, i burn the rest of the time i tan

63.) Describe your shower routine. I get in, shampoo, shave, rinse, conditioner, exfoliate sometimes, and body wash then rise hair and get out

64.) Do you enjoy school? Why or why not? Im not in school

65.) In your opinion, what is the worst way to die? struggling 

66.) Do you get carsick, sea sick, or airplane sickness? no

67.) What’s one memory that you wish you could live again and again? probs seeing one direction lmao i miss them

68.) What were some of your stuffed animal’s names from when you were a kid? scraper-he was a dog i still have him

69.)Do you have any pets? no

70.) Describe your daily wardrobe. homeless

71.)  Describe what your daily wardrobe would be if you were rich. beautiful,with the trends

72.)  Create a character right now.  Give them a name, age, and character description. Jessica Arkansas from Ohio, 22, makes youtube videos, fun when drunk,funny,works alot, drinks alot, smokes weed sometimes, love making people happy.

73.)What was the last thing you bought? Aromatherapy sleep lotion and shower gel from bath and body works.

74.) Have you ever bought a CD? What band was it for? uh yes I have many CDs, jonas brothers

75.) Describe your perfect ice cream sundae. the traditional one

76.) If you could make ANYTHING happen right now with no cost, trouble, or obstacles, what would you do? make corbyn besson fall in love with me

77.) What are some of your favorite physical activities to do? hiking, walking, going ton the gym

78.) What were some of your favorite shows as a child? Dragon tales, The Amanda show, hannah montana, thats so raven, wizards of waverly place, jonas,little bear, oswald. theres much more

79.) Describe how you would survive the zombie apocalypse. I wouldn’t

80.)What are some things you shouldn’t say at work? anything unprofessional

81.) If you were told that if you killed someone, you would save 100 people, would you do it? depends who the person im killig is (if its ****** or ********* then absolutely)

82.) How’s the weather right now? cold

83.) What is the background on your cell phone right now? its flowers that gnash tweeted one time when he released the broken hearts club

84.)Is it better to work at a job that you love or a job that pays well? a job you love.

85.) What do you have within arms reach of your bed? my stuffed giraffes.

86.) Have you ever been fired from a job? If so, why? no

87.) Have you ever won a trophy, prize, or medal? If so, for what? yes many, for soccer

88.) Do you have any posters, pictures, or art hanging on your walls in your room? If so, what are they? I have 1 poster and its corbyn and then i gave 2 2019 calendars one is jake millers and the other is a friends tv show one and i have hats on tacs hanging, poloroid pictures and a giant s for my name

89.) Are you afraid of the dark? If so, why? yes, because the dark is mf scary

90.)What is something that you’ve never done but would like to try? sky diving or parasailing

91.) If you could choose three famous people or characters to be friends with, who would you choose and why? wdw bc why not and they cool, the cast of friends because they are me and i love them, niall horan bc hes the loml

92.) Do you smile at strangers when you pass by them on the street? sometimes

93.) Do you have a favorite TV commercial? If so, what is it? no

94.) Do you like your handwriting? no

95.) Cable TV or Netflix? netflix

96.) What are your favorite smells? beautiful day from bbw

97.) Do you consider yourself physically strong? no im a weak ass bitch

98.) Describe a time where you said something really rude or mean, whether intentional or not.

oh there are mnay times im a bitch

99.) Do you ask strangers to pet their dogs? yes

100.)What is your most embarrassing moment?

wasn’t even my fault but when a group of drunk girls mauled me down a flight of stairs in front of people and DIDN’T EVEN NOTICE LMAO also whe I tripped at my high school graduaton going to get my diploma.

101.) Has anyone really close to you ever died? If so, who was it and how did you handle it?

yes, my uncle and i did not handle it well.

102.)  Describe your plan of action if you were home alone and you heard someone break into your house.

Lock myself in a room and call 911 or fight them lmao

103.) If you were to be born again, would you want to be born male or female?

probs male

104.)  What shampoo do you use?

the cheapest one i can find

105.) Guess the meaning of this word: ulotrichous.

I dont even know where to start lmao definitely a phobia for something maybe

106.) Do you let messages (phone, email, text, social media, etc…) build up, or do you have to look at them right away?

texts i let build but everythig else i dont

107.)  Where is the nearest McDonalds to your house?

on the other side of town like 5 mins away

108.)  If you had $1 billion and you had to spend it in exactly one week, what would you spend it on?

makeup, concerts tickets, plane tickets, clothes, alcohol,food.

109.) What is the best thing you’ve ever eaten?

pasta for sure

110.) If you could go on a trip around the world with up to three people, who would you bring (they can be people you know personally or famous people).

Michele, Zion, thats about it lmao

111.) What expletive/ explicit phrase do you say most often?

fuck off i guess

112.) What is your personal definition of success?

happy with yourself, your job, your life as a whole

113.) How was your day today?

it was good, tiring.

114.) What is the closest Big City you live by?

hartford or probably new york

115.) Have you ever been in a car accident?

no

116.) Do you hide anything from your parents?

yes

117.) If you could possess one talent, what would you be able to do?

sing or dance.

118.) Ugly and smart or beautiful and stupid?

ufgly and smart

119.) What is the worst thing you’ve ever seen in real life?

i dont know

120.) Use only 3 words to describe how you want your future to go.

happy, imperfectly perfect and promising.

121.) QUICK! give me a few things a brick could be useful for

hitting myself in the head

122.) If you could make a dream society, describe it in great detail where it would be, who would be in it, and what rules there would be?

somewhere warm, my friends/favorite artists, no negativity, everything is free, the artists who live there HAVE to perform every other weekend.

123.) If you could make any animal miniature, what would you make and why?

giraffes so in can have one as a pet,

124.) What are your favorite candle scents?

salted caramel, flannel, vanilla bean noel, champagne toast, hot cocoa and cream,endless weekend

125.) If you HAD to have one plastic surgery, what would you get and why?

something to make me skinnier

126.) Do you prefer to hang out with the same sex or the opposite sex?

opposite--less drama.

127.) If you could make a charity, what would the profits go towards? How would you raise money for it?

animals,homeless people, children

128.) Describe the body you wish you had.

just a flatter stomach and thinner thighs

129.) If you were a famous director, what would your next movie be about? Describe the plot, characters, and possible title.

probs a romcom or a romance movie--to tired to make a plot

130.) If only women were to rule the world, how different would the world be by 2050?

very probably better tho

131.) What is your favorite alcoholic drink?

jack and coke.

132.) Do you have a problematic friend?

doesn;t everyone?

133.) Are you more spontaneous or more of a planner?

spontaneous

134.) If you could change your full name, what would your name be?

idk

135.) What is one song that describes your life?

probably wait for you by jake miller or invisible by anna clendending

136.) What is one show you’ve been meaning to watch but can never find the time for?

all of the ones in my list

137.) Do you find it easy to drop toxic people from your life that you’ve known for a long time?

yes

138.) Do you like children? Why or why not?

yes bc they’re cute af and funny and honest

139.) What is your zodiac sign?

pisces

140.) Do you like to dance? Do you dance often? In front of other people?

when im drunk

141.) Name some of your favorite colors.

blue

142.) Have you ever shoplifted? If so, what was it?

yes random stuff from walmart lmao

143.) If you could speak three additional languages, what would they be?

spanish, italian and french

144.) Have you ever been in legal trouble?

eh

145.) Have you ever had surgery?

yes twice.

146.) If you could change 2 things about yourself, what would you change and why?

my body and my face bc uglyand fat

147.) What do you want done with your body after you die?

cremated

148.) What three physical features do people compliment you most on? What do they say about them?

my hair, eyes and outfit sometimes.

149.) If you could have your own business, what would you do?

something that requires me to travel

150.) What current friend do you have that you’ve known the longest?

Angelica--known her before we were born