#with all the crime statistics of other countries and u g h i wish i had a spine
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you know, in hindsight, it was borderline unfathomably stupid for my parents to push me into my art degree. i constantly felt like a failure and i could just see how behind every single one of my classmates i was, and no matter what i did, i never felt like i could catch up. it felt like a personal failing and that everyone was better than me simply because they were just. idk. born better at art?? had a "natural talent" that i lacked???
no, dipshit, they all took art as an elective throughout high school. we were forced into band!!!!!!!!!!!! they got to learn actual art basics while i was flailing my arms around during marching season and playing the oboe during concert season!!!!!!!!
if some art kid showed up at college and decided to become an oboe major even though they maybe took band through middle school???? they would have been at an absolutely shit disadvantage!!! they would probably do nothing but struggle and feel constantly behind!
#really can't believe just bc i would draw shitty sailor moon oc's now and then my parents thought i needed an entire art degree#i don't regret band bc i /loved/ marching band#but it was. Stupid. for my parents to push me into the art degree#really had the opposite problem of every stereotypical art major#like i WANTED the global studies degree!!!!!#i was already pretty entrenched into the program!!!!#but my Big Trauma happened and my parents lack of support for my global studies degree just. was too much#plus they kept threatening me with ''we're not paying for you to study abroad'' and trying to scare me away from studying abroad#with all the crime statistics of other countries and u g h i wish i had a spine#and like????????????? they literally???????? weren't paying??????????? anyway???????????? those loans are all mine??????????????#ANYWAYS.#i just want to get back into drawing but i still Can't#u g h#i have therapy today but it's not going to be enough time and U G H#negative
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