#wishing for clarity

[slfcare]

one day you’ll yearn for the person you are now, to tell them, "hey, look, it turned out to be okay" and "i’m so grateful you’ve held on" and "things just worked out somehow". you’ll want to hold their hand and give them the wisdom that the future is actually better, and you know it because you’re living it. but you can’t reach through time like that. the only way to bridge the gap between the you of today and the you who’s doing better, is to hold onto the hope that they exist. 

[sicahyart]

Friendship 💖

[shadyvoidhologram]

I was laying in bed overthinking, as you do, and started to go on a depressive doom spiral. And then, to distract myself I started thinking about the things I like.

[Spoilers and some gross details incoming, you know what Mouthwashing is about]

So, eventually I started thinking about Curly being in a similar headspace as I was, laying down, incapable of doing anything, constantly in pain and hearing time and time again how quickly things are going to shit and that it's all your fault.

Him replaying his mistakes over and over on his head, imagining the many ways things could've gone a different way if only he had done something instead of ignoring the issues to "keep the peace".

Remembering every interaction that led to the accident, Anya's confession, his friends poorly disguised resentment, him ignoring and filtering details of his crew's mental state, her taking the gun, the notice, Jimmy.

Him being a coward and disguising his hate of confrontation with the guise of being a good friend.

And then comming back to reality, to is burning flesh. To the blood, shit and bile staining the bandages, robe and bed, to watching and hearing his friends suffer and die, unable to do anything.

When the kid dies, in the midst of all the emotional chaos, he feels some sick sense of relief knowing that probably Swansea will deal with both of them quickly and it'll be over at last.

Then Jimmy finds the gun.

And he can't help but laugh. He remembers the conversation they had and he cackles bitterly because not even in death can her wishes be respected. She trusted him and he failed her even after she was gone.

Soon enough it's just the two of them left.

Through muffled ears he hears Jimmy rambling, talking to himself, asking questions and answering right after, he sees him moving the bodies around. When Jimmy carries him from the infirmary to the common room table he's still as stone, not a sound leaves his mouth, he doesn't look at the bodies thrown on the chairs around the table, he doesn't even breathe.

But all of Jimmy's attention, hatred, idolatry, and envy are on him only. Eyes glossy, cut pieces of a one sided conversation and a tentative smile on his lips when he reaches for the slightly dented knife.

He screams until his lungs close and his throat burns. When he's fed parts of himself he cries and throws up until he is forced to swallow and keep it down.

He's dehidrated, half delirious from the blood loss and emotionally checked out when Jimmy picks him up and tells him they can still fix this, he knows what to do. That he's going home.

Sure, he thinks, he wants to go home.

When he's placed on the cryopod he just stares at Jimmy talk to himself at him some more, about being heroes and everything being all right now. Then he steps out of sight.

It's on the silence after the loud bang when his brain starts working again, he's completely and utterly alone on a crashed ship of a company that's closing it's doors, with a now depleted shipment that wasn't even important enough to guarantee a search party, and no way of fending for himself in the case of 20 years passing and no one coming, even less if the power gave out before that.

As the cryopod finally starts to cool, the few tears he has left fall from his remaining eye.

He hopes he doesn't wake up to see what happens next.

..ok see y'all when I wake up-

[boylikeanangel]

ok more tlou episode 3 thoughts. yknow what I loved about bill's final letter to joel? the way he said that he was wrong about his original outlook on life because one person mattered to him. frank didn't make bill start loving the rest of the world or particularly care about anything happening outside of his town. he's still a deeply mistrusting person and that's something I don't think any amount of convincing from frank could have changed. but he found an exception. one person proved him wrong. he didn't need to suddenly start caring about EVERYONE. just one person was enough. just getting to spend the rest of his life with one person who loves him and whom he loves and protecting them gave his life meaning. and if you know about what joel does at the end of this story for the one person he decides he needs to protect, even at the cost of the rest of the world, you can really see why that's such a powerful thing to be established so early on in the show. these small love stories that don't factor much into the goings on of the rest of the world but ultimately tell us there is hope and humanity is not doomed, even if there will never be a cure. this is not a story about the universal goodness of humanity or even about a world that deserves to be saved, there are no characters whose actions have far-reaching consequences that will alter the course of history. this is a story about the lengths one person will go to to hold onto the one thing that makes living more bearable, these small flickers of candlelight in an endless night. neither joel nor bill are heroes, will ever be heroes. but no matter what, they can be relied upon to protect the one person they love above all else. and god help anyone who stands in their way.

[stopper-my-heart]

Heartstopper S2E5: Heat

[largemandrill]

Just fought Messmer without a spirit ash or assistance, and when I tell you that I just had the most fun in this game within my year of playing it, I’m in no way joking.

I think it’s 1) I’ve gotten pretty good at this game all things considered and 2) Messmer is genuinely an amazing fight with beautiful attacks followed by great windows and punishes. Him being fun is what kept me from being frustrated with myself. This will permanently cement him as my favorite boss fight in the entire game. There isn’t a competition anymore he won.

[jadedsundragon]

hypothetical for you: you get into a car crash, the other person involved in the crash is dying and needs an organ transplant to live, should the government be allowed to Force you to donate your organs to this person

Before I answer, I want to thank you for your courage in allowing me to see your URL. It shows that you're willing to have a real conversation instead of hiding behind a wall of anonymity designed only to attack and wound someone. I would also like to apologise in advance if I seem harsh or judgemental. I promise I am not, for I am merely responding in a way I hope will not offend people more, that is, with an academic writing style. Unfortunately, people have been uncivil today, and you are one of the only ones who has shown some respect for me as -- above all -- just another human. For that, I thank you, and if I am making an incorrect assumption about the nature of this ask, I hope you will accept my apology for that.

As for your hypothetical situation, I believe we have a misunderstanding surrounding what an organ donation is. Organs are transplanted from already-dead people and preserved and surgically implanted into living ones in hopes of their survival. To take an organ from a living person without their consent would be a violation of the legal obligation applied to doctors, nurses, and other healthcare providers that states that they must do their due diligence to save and preserve human life. For the government to force this, it would go against both our Constitution and the Natural Law. I will admit I am uneducated in regards to this forceful proposition, however, so I will allow you to correct me if you wish, and I will follow up with you.

[karumbusarr]

the entire 15 years later scenes was such a dream that was taken away too fast. when you finally calm down thinking all the issues are sorted and they're finally freaking together only for it to be snatched like that. ep 8, you're a wonder, you gave everything and took it all away

[painted-kneecaps]

when the OCD is so rampant you’re fighting the urge to google “how to be normal about people and things”

[mewkwota]

(Most of) The Boys in Room 17

For those who haven't been following for a Long while, this specific setting is for when the handful of Megas are participating in Smash, so while they all share one room they do live alongside other Final Smash participants. Here are some various interactions-- that funnily enough ended up featuring those who make up the Star Force entity.

For the bottom-left scene, I had been wanting to show more of those two hanging out more because of their respective connections with the space-n-stars. I feel like Volnutt would gladly share what he knows with Geo, but it hadn't occurred to me that maybe anything specificly regarding his life on Elysium is a tough subject.

[kit-kat-jo]

WHAT THE FUCCCKKK WHY DID IT END LIKE THAT??? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[dunmeshistash]

regarding dungeon immortality, i didn't really think tansu's comments meant *this* dungeon is unique in that regard. him saying 'here' just distinguishes the dungeon from the outside world, he could say the same about any dungeon. if there's something unique about this dungeon that caused them to choose it specifically to investigate, i would assume it's one of two things: one, this dungeon has a rare combination of different characteristics, like the fact that it's a good sized artificial dungeon in this stage of activity, as opposed to being a small dungeon, a natural dungeon, or a declining or dormant dungeon, and it's not controlled by the elves, dwarves, or some other power that would restrict access from private researchers like his group. or two, the immortality spell itself isn't unique, but they think the artificial elements of the dungeon, like the dwarven runes, might have clues about what ancient people or the mad mage have discovered about how dungeon immortality works that would make it usable as a spell outside dungeons, and *that* might be unique to this dungeon.

Yeah, thinking about it there's some ways it makes sense I just didn't think it was clear enough in the text but that might just be how I read, I thought of it of kind of a "mistake" because I've seen several people confused by how he talks about it, but again, might have been on purpose

I don't think it's an actual "mistake" just the closest thing I think feels contradicting, again, red herrings and misinformation is part of the story so I might be wrong and just missing something or forgetting something

Like, I think it makes sense he doesn't actually know why the elves want to go into the dungeon and it makes sense he thinks they want to research immortality like he is, it's just the wording that to me sounded like it was somehow special to this dungeon

Something I wish was clearer I guess? So I didn't have to fill in so many blanks myself 🤔

[front-facing-pokemon]

[antioctober]

I have ocs

[4ddi3addie2005]

Before I went to bed I saw the Youtube notif that TADC was going to Netflix and it INVADED my dreams so vividly I have not had such an episodic sequential serialized cohesive dream in months it was literally its own chapter its own short story

[active-mind-15]

Another brainrot-induced thought coming up about the KNB Drama CD Season 3 Volume 9 (shocker), but I was thinking about how after Akashi resolves the conflict with Murasakibara and Kuroko calls to check on him, Kuroko is so shocked to hear about Akashi and Murasakibara arguing. It made me belatedly remember that Kuroko was never actually present for that argument that went down in their 3rd year at Teiko that caused Akashi to switch. But then this led me to wonder, did Kuroko ever get filled in on what happened? I mean, it took til his first year of high school to get back on friendly speaking terms with the rest of the GoM, so I wonder when someone else filled him in about what happened, or if anyone filled him in at all.