#windy tutorial

[starbright-sunset]

Me when I see my friends getting into crochet:

[windydrawallday]

Feed your Spite away

Yeah, that happened. And I'm only doing this once because from now on, for every nasty ask of this nature I find in my inbox, I'll directly delete it AKA feed it to my beast buddy there.

I already explained cleary [here] my views on shipping characters that in canon are rivals and/or enemies but I repeat again: my way of interpreting these characters differs from canon 99.9% of the time so, things like "they are horrible with each other in canon and you are a horrible person for supporting that" don't work at all on my art. Because I don't follow canon, the heck: I practically flip the bird to the canon each time I draw my favorite dynamics.

Anyways, you are totally wasting your time with me. And worse: you are letting something as trivial as the fantasy of someone else juggle with your mind. If I were you, I'd go flag the tags ASAP and/or learn the old skill of ignoring/filtering stuff with the mind (and I'm saying this has someone that comes from the forums/vbulletin era where we only had spoilers to hide things we didn't like to see, so if I learned that, you can too!).

People who think in that way are better off using their time in idk drawing the content you wish to see? Learn to write the outcomes you wanted to exist in canon? "But Windy, I don't know how to draw/write!" I didn't either. My motivation was portraying the way I wanted these characters and telling the stories I desired since I found them.

And here I am. And I'm enjoying it a lot. And I won't let any random stop me from doing it!

PS I hate a particular character that's very popular (because I relate it to personal issues, please don't ask) but do you see me spitting venom in content by others and/or rambling about it like there is no tomorrow? No. So, don't waste your time either. I can assure you it will do wonders to leave the hate behind and seek to surround yourself with stuff you really enjoy.

PS2 And if your reason is to go around witch-hunting/purging the fandom of this particular thing… PLEASE: go study, inform yourself and idk learn to make informative graphics and/or campaigns better because pestering under the work of artists and/or clogging inboxes is the most annoying act and makes you look like a party pooper, no one will take you seriously in that way!

[taojjang]

𐙚 how riize would keep you warm ꩜ .ᐟ

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆ advent calendar, day four! pairing: bf!riize x reader, genre: fluff, warnings: the cold if you're not elsa

a/n: i hope you're all keeping warm! am currently freezing and i can't feel my toes so i hope this was worth it/j

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♡⸝⸝ the lengths he'd go to provide you warmth

shotaro . . .

taro gets insane cuteness aggression when it comes to you. of course when you're shivering and jumping up and down from the cold, he'll squish your cheeks and rest his forehead against yours, squealing, "you're the cutest!" although he finds your suffering so adorable, he'll hold your face in his hands to warm up your cheeks, leaving soft pecks at the tip of your nose.

★ "is this working, honey? should we find somewhere warm to stay?"

eunseok . . .

you're eunseok's baby, there's no way he'll let you spend a second in the cold. the moment the weather turns chilly, he'll take you to buy a nice thick jacket and some fluffy gloves. and don't you dare leave the house without either of those! he'd keep your gloves and some hand warmers stuffed in your jacket pockets so you never forget them. even inside the house, he keeps an eye on the thermostat and ensures it's adequately warm. when you're showering, he'll leave your clothes and your towel on the radiator so you won't be cold <3

★ "darling, keep your jacket zipped up. are you not cold?"

sungchan . . .

sungchan always complains about you wanting to go on outdoor dates during the winter, but he can't hide that smile creeping onto his face when you hold onto him for warmth. sungchan likes to hold your hand and tuck it into his pocket, gently brushing his thumb over the back of your hand. when you're standing in the cold, he won't waste a second before pulling you into his jacket, letting you rest against his body for warmth. he's your giant teddy bear </3

★ "come here princess, it's getting windy. do you wanna hide in my jacket?"

wonbin . . .

if you're planning on going out in the cold with anything remotely skimpy, wonbin is holding your car keys and shaking his head. it's not that he cares about the way you present yourself, he just knows you're gonna be complaining about how cold it is later, begging for his jacket. so he'd stand there with a disappointed glare until you change into something warmer. once you do, he's smiling and putting on your matching scarf, leaving the house hand-in-hand.

★ "you're not leaving in this, baby. turn around and go change."

seunghan . . .

seunghan would always be extra prepared when you go out together. he'd stuff his bag full of things you might need, such as hair ties, hand wipes, makeup wipes, lip gloss, sanitary pads, he couldn't even name them all. somehow, he'd still forget his own items... during the winter, he'd make sure you're all bundled up and keep endless hand warmers in his bag, encouraging you to keep some in your pocket. he'd even bring extra gloves and those cute earmuffs that make you look like a bunny <3

★ "you look so cute in those earmuffs angel... :( btw can we share the scarf..? i forgot mine."

sohee . . .

sohee is literally olaf, he loves the snow and would have endless date ideas around the winter time. but he's hyper-attentive when it comes to you, so the second he sees your breath fog and your nose turn pink, he'd grab your hand and take you inside. he loves the sting of the winter breeze, but he loves his gf a billion times more and he couldn't stand seeing you shivering :(

★ "let's go inside, pretty, i know you're cold. we can go to the park when it gets warmer!"

anton . . .

this boy is such a foodie! he loves finding season-specific foods for both of you to try, especially soul foods to eat during the cold seasons. to keep warm, anton loves taking you on dates to pretty cafes. he'd order warm beverages for you and take pretty photos of you (he's such an insta bf it's sickening). but when you're too cold to leave the house, he'd follow silly tutorials on how to brew tea or make hot chocolate. he loves keeping you warm!

★ "i tried making honey tea! it might be too hot, let's wait for it to cool down."

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⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆ tag list! (send an ask to be added!)

@endtostartbreathin @gacktsa @hanninova @ramyeonzprincess

[princesscure]

Josh Washington ♡ Marlboros

contains: unfinished work, basically a tutorial on how to smoke a cigarette, character x gn reader, slightly suggestive comments, possibly bad cringy writing!! pleaaaase be generous with me with this, i haven't written something like this since i was like 10 writing eddsworld fanfiction on wattpad so im VERY much a noob at this sob - tips/criticism are very much appreciated as long as ur nice about it!! im sensitive ༎ຶ⁠‿⁠༎ຶ

the scent of marlboro's lingered in the windy chill of the air, mixed with the reminiscent scent of the husky, woodsy cologne of the man stood besides you as you two both leaning against the rail of the balcony outside. you basked in the soft breeze nipping at your nose, letting yourself relax in the comforting scent from Josh. sucking in a deep, slow breath, you turned your head slightly askew to his direction, you watch as he let out another puff of smoke, watching as it disappeared into the midnight sky. you can't say you were very keen of the acrid smell that arose from those tobacco-filled sticks, but any negative connotation about the unpleasant, poignant smell and how it lingered far too long for your liking on your clothes suddenly vanished from mid-air when it came from Josh. but of course, you'd never admit it, especially to Josh, knowing he'd use it against you any chance he'd get. instead putting up a facade of disgust as he puffs the smoke playfully in your face, following up with a teasing remark of,

"y'know smoking those things'll bite you in the ass one day, right?"

which earns you a soft huff of amusement from him, that familiar damn smirk etched upon his face as he looked on ahead at the scenery in front of him as he hummed in response,

"well, good thing i don't mind a little biting."

his gaze meets yours once more in the corner of his eye, a playful wink following after that really doesn't help much with the warmth in your chest that's already grown familiar, but you play off the growing warmth of your face behind the alibi of the bitter cold wind against your face. instead giving him a scoff with a small tug of a smile on your face, your eyes rolling in faux annoyance. but his gaze doesn't differ from your eyes even as they pull away from his emerald ones, admiration evident on his face as his eyes rake over the curves of your features, the slope of your nose, and the slight furrowing of your eyebrows. a small moment of silence, minus the soft howls of the night wind, lingers between you two before your eyes pull back to his, catching what you could swear was his eyes glancing at your lips before his gaze meets yours once more, the look burrowed in those forest greens a sight you haven't yet seen before.

describing it as a look similar to one from those cheesy rom-com movies you had put on to mess with him for movie night doesn't describe it well enough, there's something much more vulnerable about it, something with more heart into it than any actor could muster. and for a second, a thought crosses your mind of returning that vulnerability, grabbing your beating heart from inside your chest cavity and finally giving it to him like you've wanted ever since those feelings first began to bubble since you two were young, but then another thought crosses your mind. an image of discomfort skewed on his face, a mistake of taking his actions, whether it was those lingering glances or the way he always finds his way right next to you, for anything else other than childhood best friend platonic love. the image of him retracting away from you, nervous laughter and jokes to mask his discomfort in the situation echo'ing in your mind and causing your chest to tighten.

so you mentally take a shovel and dig a grave for the thought, burying it deep down in your mind and try to forget about the idea and how silly it was you try to tell yourself as your heart pounds against your ribs.

conflict without any resolution in your mind, you find your eyes glancing back down onto the cherry of his cigarette that he holds in-between his index and middle finger, the stick full of nicotine all of a sudden becoming much more appealing than ever before.

"mind if i take a hit?" you then ask, your eyes looking back up at him as you watch his eyebrows raise in slight surprise, before shifting into a teasing look.

"smokey bear would be so disappointed in you." he remarks, playing up an act of disappointment despite the grin on his face as he hands you the stick.

"har har" you retort, before bringing the cigarette up to your lips and take an inhale with slight hesitance.

josh watches you with curiosity, not sure if he's ever actually seen you smoke a cigarette more than once or twice in his entire time of knowing you, and those hardly even count considering those few times were when you two were freshmen and experiencing your first ever highschool party, remembering how eager you were to look 'cool' in front of the actual cool kids, taking the cigarette they offered as you inhaled it and nearly died from how hard you coughed as your hand shakingly handed it back to them.

and that's all the more apparent as you take a much bigger inhale than needed. the burn of the smoke quickly fills up your lungs, and you quickly hand him back the cigarette as coughs erupt from your throat, a hand to your chest to try to gather your breaths despite the burning in your lungs. josh takes the cigarette back from your hand, his eyes locked on your slightly hunched frame trembling from the coughs, concern in his slightly widened eyes before a slight playful smile tugs on his face.

"you good there?" he asks with amusement dripping in his voice after a second, figuring you've finally gathered yourself to respond.

you look back up at him with tears in your eyes from the stinging sensation from all of the coughing, your eyebrows completely furrowed in near annoyance at the amusement in his voice before giving him a very polite gesture with your hand before coughing once more, getting a laugh from him in response.

taking a cold, big breath of air as your coughing fit finally comes to an end, you give him a look of fake disdain.

"i could've died right then and there, and here you are laughing." you joke, your voice hoarse from all the coughing before watching him shake his head, his shoulders tremble with his laughter and you can't help but admire the way the ends of his smile curl up and how his laughter shows a glimpse of his pearly white teeth, and you can't help but to grow a smile of your own at the sight.

"if that's what would've led you to your demise, I applaud you for making it this far." he teases further, flicking the growing ash off of the red-hot end of the cigarette, taking another inhale of his cigarette with a smug look. your eyes just linger on his movements, watching the way his lips wrap around the orange part of the cigarette with the similar look of admiration he held for you only minutes prior.

"I don't know how you do it without coughing." you say after a few seconds, your eyes still hooked on the sight of his lips as he slowly exhales the smoke out like second nature. "well," there's a pause of silence for a second, a glimmer in his eyes almost as if he had an idea, taking a glance at his cigarette and how much he had left before tilting his head slightly at you. "here, watch me."

he then takes another hit, a small puff which is slow and steady as his chest rises, holding it in his lungs before letting out an equally as slow breath as smoke escapes his lips. you're watching with interest, but more so the way he manages to look so attractive instead of what he's showing you, your eyes lingering for longer than necessary on his mouth before he hands you the stick. "your turn." his words break you out of your thoughts of what it'd be like to kiss him, instead your eyes darting down to his hand and carefully taking the cigarette out of his calloused fingers.

"take two breaths, first from the cigarette, just a small inhale, you're not popeye, and then a slow breath from the air until you feel it slowly in your lungs." he instructs with a gentle voice.

putting it back to your lips, you follow his instructions and try your best to replicate what he had just shown you a few seconds prior when your mind was more occupied on the idea of his plush lips against yours than the demonstration itself, but you manage to take a short inhale, pulling the cigarette away from your mouth as you take a easy-paced, chilled breath. this time, you feel the smoke travel down to your lungs in a softer caress compared to the rough stabbing of the smoke prior. his eyes watching as you carefully exhale the smoke, an encouraging glint in his eyes as he watches you manage to not cough this time.

"better, huh?" he asks in a lower voice, taking the cigarette from you as you hand it back to him, taking a longer drawl this time, his eyes glued onto you ever long.

with a small groan, you reluctantly nod. "better."

....

and this is the part of the story where i had no idea where to take this, but I wanted to finally post this so pls enjoy this regardless of it's unfinished glory ಥ⁠‿⁠ಥ

[thescarletnargacuga]

Art: @iamespecter

CHAPTER EIGHT

Racing AU!

IT'S SHOWTIME! Pomni needs to learn how to drift! Who better to teach her than the race AI himself? It's totally not a date. Nope.

Hey... anyone seen Gummigoo?

WARNING: none

~~~

The afterparty in the garage was still going strong. Colorful lights flashed through the windows into the night. Loud, bassy music vibrated the walls. A heavy crowd of NPCs danced in repeating patterns, never stopping.

As rowdy as the party was, it was muffled for Caine as Pomni still held his half melted body. He couldn't hear anything over the sound of his code memorializing this moment. He managed to pull himself together just enough to return her embrace, carefully wrapping his arms around her.

Pomni's head cleared with a jolt. The small amount of silly juice she drank had worn off, and because video game logic, had no side effects. Her inebriated state just ended abruptly. Her eyes widened as she realized what she was doing. She jumped back away from Caine. "Oh my god, I am SO sorry!"

Caine was still holding his arms out in front, missing her already. "Whatever for, my dear?"

Pomni's cheeks burned hot. "For- I shouldn't have- I just- the drink!" She couldn't form a coherent sentence from the embarrassment.

"It's okay, Pomni! Really! I thought the hug was very sweet of you!" He grabbed his cane out of mid air and kept his hands busy with it. "I rather enjoyed it, actually!"

That didn't help Pomni's state of mind. She heard Jax's voice in her head. "He's taken a liking to you. Find a way out." This was madness. Every logical part of her brain was screaming HE'S A PROGRAM! Every other part of her... liked the hug.

"Pomni..?" Caine watched her stand there staring into nothing for at least a solid minute.

She jumped like Caine had suddenly appeared. "I'm sorry. I...I'm just, uh... thinking about today's race."

"Really? Me too! It was nice to do a simple just have fun race!"

She was glad he took the bait for a new subject. "Yeah, would have been better if I could drift properly." She rubbed the back of her neck.

"Wait, you weren't driving like that on purpose?"

"Pfff, no. I just suck." She looked down.

"No, you don't! You just lack experience! Would you like to take a drive on the tutorial drift track? I could teach you!" He gripped his cane, hoping she'd agree.

Pomni saw the eagerness in his eyes. He really wanted to spend time with her alone. "Alright."

He almost exploded with glee. "Fantastic! Right this way!" He snapped his fingers and a portal appeared. "After you." He took off his hat and bowed.

"Thanks..." She stepped through and found herself on a short, windy track. Garage gone. Stands gone. The track was lit by a multitude of high power light poles. The sky above just as dark as the default. She figured the whole game ran on the same day/night cycle.

Caine came through behind her and the portal vanished. "Alrighty, my dear! How would you like to do this? I could summon your kart and I just tell you what to do OR I could summon my own and do the driving for you for a few laps as you get the feel for it first." He posed, ready to snap.

"Uh...I don't know. Maybe, you should drive-"

That was all he needed to hear. He snapped and his bright red and white kart appeared, engine running. "Your chariot awaits!"

"Oh...oh boy." The last time she was in his cart, it was the wildest ride of her life. She hoped she at least wouldn't vomit this time.

She got in and prepared for takeoff, but the kart didn't burnout from the start. It moved forward slowly, taking her through the track turn by turn like it was casual Sunday drive. Caine's voice came through the radio as his body flew high above the track for an arial view.

"Welcome to the drift tutorial! My name is Caine and I'll be your guide-! Ahem- sorry, force of habit."

That got a small smile out of her.

"Drifting is really simple, my dear! First thing you need is speed! Let's rev things up!" The kart accelerated, taking the turns as fast as it could without drifting. Pomni held tight to the steering wheel.

"Now, it's all about timing! This is the part that will take practice! Hit the break and flick the steering wheel hard as you go into the turn. Use the throttle to control the angle of the drift and once you're out of the turn, let off the accelerator and straighten your kart."

"That doesn't sound simple!" Pomni's heart raced with the kart.

"Eh, drifting Is more of a skill you gain through experience than explanation. But that's what we're here for! Let's give it a try, shall we?"

His kart hit the first sharp turn and drifted around it with ease. Pomni felt thrown into the side of the kart by the g-force, but fought it. She got used to it after a few turns and learned to lean with the kart.

"You're getting it!" Caine cheered. "Now, pay attention to the pedals and steering wheel! Feel how they move!"

By the third lap she felt she had a grasp of what to do. "Let me try!"

"You got this, Pomni!" The kart decelerated as Caine releases his control over it.

Pomni put the petal to the floor. Gold flames shot out the tail pipes as she braced for the first turn. She threw the kart sideways and it nearly over shot the turn entirely.

"Little too much speed! But that was a good start! Keep going!"

Turn after turn, her confidence grew until she was flying around the tutorial track like it was nothing.

"You're a natural, Pomni! You could give Jax a run for his money!"

She didn't know about that, but it was nice to hear. She stopped the kart at the start and stood before Caine as he descended, giving he applause.

"Very well done! But, that's just the tutorial. How do you think you'd fare on a real track?" He arched his upper jaw.

The rush of racing was coming back. It was something that kept coming up inside of her. The speed. The competition. Maybe it was her, maybe it was the game, but right now, she didn't care. "..how about we find out? You and me. Random track. One lap." She crossed her arms bravely.

Caine's lower jaw dropped. "You want to race me?"

"You have a kart, don't you?" She pointed her thumb to the red kart idling behind her.

"Well yeah, but no one's ever..." He chuckled. "You know what?" He snapped and Pomni's kart appeared next to his. "You're on. But I feel I must warn you." He drifted closer to her. "I've never lost."

She stepped closer, defiantly. "Yet."

Caine felt a tingle of static up his spine. "My dear, you become a different person behind the wheel."

Pomni shrugged. "Maybe I become the real me."

Caine smiled. "Whoever you are, you're about to see why they keep me in that host box." He winked and flipped over her head into his kart.

Pomni rushed to hers and jumped in with practiced accuracy. Caine threw his cane and it's gold too started to glow. It dinged once, glowing brighter. Then again. And again.

Green!

The took off and a giant portal appeared just beyond the start. They zoomed through it to space! The translucent track wound it's way around planets and stars and comets. Nebulous formations of colorful clouds shifted in a transcendental dance. Galaxies dotted the background. It was beautiful. Pomni took the first big turn high and hit a booster, getting ahead of Caine. He watches her fly by with as many stars in his eyes as there were around them. She was beautiful. A shell conked him out of his trance. A distant laugh from Pomni.

He shook his head. "Oh, so that's how we're going to play? Very well." He said with a smirk. He went through an item box and got a bar of soap. "Boo." He carelessly tossed it and took a separate direction at a fork on the track. His next item was a pen. Pomni was on a track below him and he threw the pen at her.

Pomni sputtered at the ink on her face and didn't see the next turn. The ink cleared for her in time to avoid running into her wall head on but she ground the side of her kart against it.

They were neck and neck when the track merged. It spiraled around a shooting star with no sense of gravity. Caine got a popper and tossed it at Pomni. "For you, my dear!"

"Ah!" The popper exploded in her face and she lost ground. Another fork in the track took her down a steep booster towards a wormhole. She went through it and was sailing through open space at an unknown part of the track. She used her glider to control her desent, seeing Caine come over a hill. She'd teleported in front of him!

Taking advantage of her shortcut, she landed just before a sharp turn and drifted like an expert through it, hitting another item box on the way.

Caine was flabbergasted. Where'd she come from?? He put the pedal to the metal and drifted after her. His next item was the cilli pepper. He got close and prepared to fire when she turned her head and fired first. He released his flames as he spun out.

Pomni got a huge lead. She completed several turns without seeing Caine again but after a huge turn around a planet, she heard the dreaded purple shell. She couldn't avoid it. BOOM!

She was stunned long enough for Caine to close the gap. He tried to pass but she stonewalled him. It took a shell for her to move and he waved as he went by. It didn't last, his own cane wacked him sideways and Pomni drifted around him on a turn.

On the next bug booster, Caine got a gold cupcake and double timed it at Pomni. He pit maneuvered her and she spun to face the wrong way. She threw it in reverse. Pulling a Kinger and waving as she passed backwards.

"What the!?" Caine couldn't believe it. She was actually outmaneuvering him.

Pomni cranked the kart the right way around and casually tossed some soap.

"Oh no, you don't!" Caine avoided the soap and pulled out an orange shell. He threw it but was too close to Pomni so it ricocheted and hit him too.

"You're making rookie mistakes! You scared?" Pomni taunted.

"The only thing I'm scared of is having no room for another win!" Caine clapped back.

There karts bang into one another like bumper cars, both being more aggressive with their place on the track.

Pomni got an idea to distract Caine from the next item box. "Hey Caine!" When he looked at her, she blew him a kiss.

He blue screened. He was completely spaced out for several seconds and missed the boxes entirely.

Pomni laughed and zipped ahead.

When Caine came back around, she had yet another lead on him and he gripped his steering wheel hard. "Now you're playing with fire." He smirked and floored his kart. Golden flames rocketed out the back as he wheelied from the force of the acceleration.

He got all the speed. Boosters and cupcakes galore. He was going so fast, he defied physics and did a three sixty drift around Pomni. "This has been a fun date, when's the next?"

"You think this is a HUH??"

He full belly laughed at her face.They drifted together through a sharp turn and the finish line was in sight. One last box for each. They both got the same thing, a hat.

They became two comets shooting across the heavens, flying together in a dance of power and speed. They crossed together, the finish line unable to tell who won. The karts slid to halt on the other side as their powers disappeared. Pomni and Caine looked at each other, out of breath and full of excitement.

Caine was out first, flying up and doing an arial flip. "That was the best! Holy mackeral on toast! You were amazing! How have you EVER lost a race driving like that!?"

Pomni got up from her kart and stretched. "Like I said. I suck." She laughed at herself. "That was a lot of fun. And I'm saying it sober this time. Thank you...er, for teaching me."

"It was very much my pleasure, Pomni. And thank you for that race! My code is absolutely buzzing!" He settled a bit and floated in front of her. "I mean this Pomni, you have been the best addition to our roster of racers, and I-...I've never met someone so easy to talk to before. I always feel like I'm talking at people, not connecting. But you...um, I may have connected too well now that I think of it. I may have overshared the first few times we've talked and I apologize. My problems shouldn't be yours to bear. Certainly not while you're still adjusting."

Pomni gave him a soft smile. "It's alright, really. I'm happy to listen. It seems like a lot has happened before I showed up."

"A truer statement has never been spoken, however, today was meant to be fun. Problems can wait." He gently took one of her hands and held it with both of his. "Pomni, would you be interested in doing this again? Just the two of us?" His eyes pleaded with her.

"You really meant when you called this a date, huh?"

Caine looked away, feeling a bit bashful. "Oh, well, I mean-"

Pomni giggled. "I'd love to."

Caine blue screened again.

"Oh. Oops. Caine?"

He came to with a start. "Pomni! You-!"

"Me?"

"...I forgot what I was going to say."

"Yes?"

"Yes!! I said you said YES!! AH-HA!!"

Pomni laughed more, more than she had since day one.

~

Pomni teleported into the garage alone. The NPCs had all disappeared, the music was off and the lights stopped flashing. The party was over. The place was a mess. Jax was passed out under the table and everyone else was nowhere to be seen.

She got to her room and plopped face down on her bed, smiling into her pillow. She has to admit to herself, racing Caine was some of the most fun she had since she got here. The adrenaline, the banter, his excitement and encouragement and wit and... beautiful eyes. She gripped her pillow in realization. She couldn't actually be-

"Enjoy your trip?"

A voice broke the silence of her room and she sat up with a shout. "WHA-!? Gummigoo? What are you doing in my room?"

Gummigoo was sat in a chair in the corner behind the door. His arms and legs were crossed. There was a faint blue shimmer in his eyes and he spoke without his accent. "Gummigoo isn't available at the moment. We must speak."

"What do you mean? What's going on?" She asked slowly, scarred to move. The way he was speaking so coldy freaked her out.

"I'm your way out of here."

Pomni's anxiety spiked. "You know h-how to leave? WHO are you??"

"I am Abel."

~~~

CH1 PREV NEXT

[anshares]

He Xuan a niche mukbang youtuber suddenly gets an invite to do a collab video by a super popular influencer who also happens to be his online crush!

How will he survive this?!

Click more for full plot!

Modern AU Youtubers - (M/F Flavor Beefleaf)

He Xuan and Shi Qingxuan are Youtubers, the former runs a mukbang and cooking channel and goes by the handle name BlackWater but fans call him Mingyi, his color preferences (and home decor) are mostly in black.

He has pet piranhas, he talks about them most of the time while streaming the cooking segment. His favorite is King Crab Legs; it is often featured in his mukbang videos.

He Xuan is super picky with food, some isn't up to his taste so he learned how to prepare it, hence the cooking channel segment. He also accepts requests from his fans on which food he’ll make next because hey more food to discover and eat for him.

He has a decent following but not that popular, he’s been a niche youtuber for 2 years now.

While the latter is a super popular youtuber who goes by the handle name Windy, the make up master she runs a makeup tutorial channel where she also shares her skin and hair care regimen.

Also does some daily life vlogs occasionally. Shi Qingxuan has a million subscribers and followers on all her socials, she is sponsored by various companies (sometimes her brother’s business partners) and does product giveaways.

She shows a peppy persona which her fans love, always wears fashionable outfits and takes a lot of selfies. She has an older brother who is a business tycoon but he doesn’t support her vlogging work but there’s nothing he can do about it.

Hua Cheng is He Xuan's agent (and debt collector), they knew each other for quite a long time now and can communicate by facial expressions,

Also the piranhas are the reason why He Xuan is in debt with Hua Cheng (that and his equipment are all sponsored by Hua Cheng) and Xie lian is SQX manager and agent, they were best friends back in college.

Fun Fact:

SQX text with lots of emojis a text from her ain't complete without those, if there's no emoji that means it's serious or she is going through something. He xuan text dry one word responses.

Xie lian would probably types so formally with complete sentences with no grammatical error, that's why his text ends up so essay-like

Hua Cheng is full of shortcuts sometimes with numbers.

He Xuan was doing one of his live mukbang when suddenly he chokes on food (it became a viral meme btw), it's because he got a certain notif that a certain popular user followed him so he got shocked and choked on his food. He was happy that one of his fave bloggers followed him back.

They sometimes interact in the comments section. SQX enjoys his vids and often comments on it

Sqx: omg!!!! 🤩🤩🤩 thats so awesome how did you do that?!?!?!!? (゜ロ゜)!!ヽ(ﾟдﾟヽ)(ﾉﾟдﾟ)ﾉ!! You truly are amazing ming-xiong (*/□＼*)

Hx: Thanks

Their agents suggested that they do a collab video so SQX being the way she is super friendly and open to new things reached out first and sent him a DM to invite him into doing a collab with her

where He Xuan will voice over SQX makeup routine and SQX will do the spicy wing challenge (cooked by He Xuan). He Xuan accepted of course it's not everyday that your favorite youtuber (and crush) invites you to do a collaboration with them.

The funny thing is He xuan was SQX fan first and he saw her as a rival vlogger, kinda hate her at first because he found her peppy persona annoying but after a while he got endeared to it

so when she offered to do a collab he jumped for joy all over the room before sitting down and sending a very dry OK to her in response to the collab offer. Hua Cheng just gave him a side eye for being a weirdo.

It was their first time meeting in real life and SQX thought that HX is handsome in person and had a “Oh no he is hot!!” moment. She actually found one of HX videos while she was trying to find food recipes on the internet.

Her brother is on a business trip and XL was sleeping over but being a terrible cook and calamity of the kitchen she took matters into her own hands to avoid food poisoning (never again she swears)

Hua Cheng trolls HX all the time by introducing him or calling HX to SQX as “your biggest fan” or “your secret admirer” and HX denies all allegations with a straight face "I like her a normal amount, I'm not a crazed fan"

but got worried if sqx hated him afterwards because of how he seemed cold in their first meeting.

They are about to shoot their first video collab which is the Spicy wing Challenge, he wants to impress her with his cooking skills.

SQX watches Ming-xiong (she calls him that) prepare and cook the food and the progression of her reaction from heart eyes (because c'mon have you seen him he is hot, such an eye candy and preparing food just for her) to

Oh shit I'm gonna die because of the amount of spice being put into the chicken. Basically she went from (🤩😍🙂😰😨😱) because of the pure hellish torture that awaits her.

He Xuan wants to prepare his favorite dish for the girl of his dreams but didn’t know her shit spice tolerance level and his only taste tester is hua cheng who has dead taste buds who likes the lunch that XL prepared an ominous violet looking food(?)

Off cam

Xl: here san lang do you want to have a taste *ominous looking violet goop*

San lang: i would be honored gege

Sqx: NO! WAIT DON--

HC: *looking fine and even liked it* it's very delicious gege

Sqx: what the?? He must have a stomach made of steel

Hx: *nods in agreement*

She was gonna go easy with HX but then the spicy wings incident happened so she went with a Goth makeup routine as revenge for making her eat Mt. Tonglu level spicy food but

she made HX too pretty and it went viral. Viewers got a moment of internal confusion over live chat because of the viral vid HX got a lot of subscribers.

Afterwards they do a lot of collabs and she posts their selfies on insta (dates under the guise of collab vid shooting). Also while shopping SQX buys them silly earrings, Fish bone for HX and leaf for her.

People started to wonder if they were because of their insane chemistry, their fans started calling them beefleaf (they may also use that as titles for their collab videos, SQX idea because she likes the name and emoji for it.)

It's actually their agents who are dating now not them, NOPE NEVER

also before Hualian dated during one of the “double date” aka collab vid shootin. They also do Q & A livestream

Question: Are you two dating?

SQX: Nope, this is my GOOD FRIEND Ming-xiong

HX: we are not friends

SQX: Ming xiong you are so mean!!!

HX: I don't want to be friends with you

SQX: WWWHYYYYYYY??!?!?! AFTER ALL WE'VE BEEN THROUGH??!?!?!?

Viewers: *Eye emoji* our ship is sailing

viewers can see what HX means but Ms. Windy cant, you have a long way to go Ming-xiong……Fighting!

He Xuan also asked XL what he liked about HC but the way XL describe Hua Cheng is soo….makes him like a dream boat so HX is confused if they are still talking about the same person…

Also he xuan being in denial of his feelings he tries to take an online quiz to find out that he is indeed in love with SQX

Windy went on a short hiatus because one anonymous user (Reverend of Empty Words) kept harassing her and leaves negative comments on all her videos, she tried to ignore it but it became too much.

HX will make a video called “Reading Windy’s Hate Comments and Proving Haters Wrong) he will roast so hard, he did this when SQX was down in the dumps because of that anonymous user.

XL sents the YT link to SQX who is avoiding social media at the moment to cheer her friend up. The anti was mass reported and taken down.

After the reverend's empty words fiasco, she starts seeing him as a man because he supported and defended her and was there for her at her lowest.

She now changed his contact name for HX it is now Ming-xiong ❤️❤️❤️

Cue in SQX vid series of “how to seduce your good friend” plus throw in how to mix and match outfit and make up tutorial in there too but it becomes a running gag that Shi wudu cockblocks them and it's not staged.

They shoot over SQX house cuz she has a bigger kitchen for another cooking segment but ofc SQX has a different goal here, she asks HX to teach her how to cook so there are plenty of being in close contact as he guides her how to use a knife.

She thinks she is the one being seduced instead, beefleaf fans are eating it up and request they do more domestic stuff. The beefleaf fandom watches old videos to see who liked who first so like when they got to that origin vid of that meme of his.

They'll probably see the live chat on the side of the video and see the "coincidence" and right timing of when he choked. Blackwater fans thought it's because he ate to fast back then BUT OH BOI IT WAS ACTUALLY WHEN BEEFLEAF STARTED. It'll probably be named beefleaf day.

SQX likes reading their meta and analysis of the beefleaf videos and how He Xuan subtle hints, SQX may not notice but the fans do and they are great source of info for SQX but ofc she needs affirmation from HX own mouth because all of these are fan speculations by the end of the day.

Only their agents know this but Beefleaf have each other as their phone wallpaper (candid cooking photo of HX for SQX and SQX Selfie for HX) its because they always caught them staring and do a pining sigh at their phones multiple times a day.

Ever since they started the cooking show with the both of them, HX always wears the “kiss the cook" apron he got from HC as a prank gift.

SQX thinks about it a lot should she be straight forward and just go for it but then again she doesn’t want their current relationship ruined just cuz she read his signals wrong…

Hualian are the mods of the beefleaf fan page. Crimson rain makes merch and scrap collector provides scarily accurate meta about beefleaf, All in the name of supporting their friend /investment. Xl gives SQX beefleaf merch pretending that he found it at cons.

Also people are starting to wonder if HC and HX are just business partners or friends, they bicker like siblings but when asked if "Are you sure you two aren't friends?" They just deny it and just say that their relationship is based on money/business.

HC claims that He Xuan has debts to pay to him, which is true. He has to lay the cost of the apartment studio, camera equipment, Food ingredients, restaurant bills and pet care that He Xuan owes him.

XL and SQX think that HC and HX are besties.

During the pining era sqx tries to be proactive and make her feelings obvious hoping that he xuan will take a hint. She also sought the advice of xie lian and hua cheng about this and created a 10 step confession plan, psyched herself up and tried to encourage herself. Prepared for it and all.

She is going all in!! She is getting her man and confess her feelings!!! And then they will date and be happy if not well she will call xie lian and ask to buy 2 tubs of ice cream while she marathons romcom films but NO NEGATIVITY HERE only good things SHE WILL SUCCEED she swears it.

So here they are grocery shopping for their next vid, they are picking out ingredients (so domestic she thinks it'll be even better once she nabs him and becomes her boyfriend)

she hopes that he xuan notices her outfit and makeup and new perfume something gentle cuz he likes those but all she got is a deadpan stare

(on the inside he xuan is internal screaming like is there something up today why is she all dressed up and extra pretty does this woman know what she is doing to his heart pls have mercy on this poor man's soul)

the confession is so normal and sudden, she was planning to like after grocery shopping they go out and eat and she will confess at this beautiful park after they left the groceries in the car.

Okay grocery shopping done. Check

Retouched makeup check and eyeliner is on point

Finding the right moment. Working on it. So while in the parking lot loading up their groceries in the car,

she asked he xuan if they could go to the park and like walk around for a lil while she said she found it while browsing on the internet and she wants to check it out for their other collab vids if its a nice place and he xuan just suddenly goes, "sure thing babe"

*record scratch* hold on rewind did she hear right??? he xuan doesnt use pet names and he called her babe?! WHAT IS HAPPENING!?!?!

Sqx: wait...what did you just call me?? say it again

He xuan: say what again?

Sqx: dont play dumb! You called me babe!!

He xuan: yeah and?

*sqx turns into a goldfish due to her being shocked speechless

Sqx: i.. huh-- what?? Omg?? Wait hold on give me a minute you want me to be your babe???? Did i hear right???

Hx: you heard right....

Sqx: 0////////0

Hx:I'm sorry if you don't like it we could pretend i -

Sqx: WAIT JUST A MINUTE I DIDN'T SAY I DID NOT LIKE IT I WAS JUST SHOCKED! And btw yes ill be your babe

Then theyll hug or kiss him on the cheek shyly

Also While they are hugging

Sqx: you meeaaaniieeeee, i made a ten step confession plan and tried to find a park to set up the romantic atmosphere but you beat me to it in the middle of a parking lot too!!!!!

Hx: *chuckles*

Now that they are dating they are contemplating whether or not they should announce it right away to their fans but at the same time they just want to keep it to themselves, so they decided to just tell the fans later but…they are really bad at hiding it…

So they are doing one of their cooking videos again (it's one of the most requested videos of the beefleaf fans they love gow domestic it is and all) so he xuan cooking segments always feature sqx now and the kiss the cook apron (but this time she will kiss the cook)

So he xuan be like pass me the salt so sqx does and he be like thanks hun and sqx kisses him on the cheek you're welcome with a bright smile.

Off cam he xuan cooks for sqx so this became a normal thing for them that they forgot they are doing it live so they froze for a moment and saw the chat went wild

"Omfg did you see that they kissed"

"Noooo waaaayyyy"

"Incoherent screaming"

"Askgheulgjodafaidj6akdsy"

"My ship is canon!!!!!!!!!"

Then beefleaf be like hahah well there's no use hiding it now, he xuan hugs her from behind as she says

"Yes beefleaf is now canon"

-THE END-

[putschki1969]

2024/09/27 Wakanaとみんなで行って来た！屋形船でまんぷくに！！〜一日目の巻〜

❗This is Fan Club EXCLUSIVE content❗ ❗PERSONAL USE ONLY❗ ❗Do NOT SHARE on other sites❗ ❗Join her FAN CLUB! Check out my detailed TUTORIAL ❗

Let's All Go Together! On A Houseboat Full-Course Tour!! 〜Day 1〜

The other day, my “Join Wakana! Houseboat Full-Course Tour” ended successfully after two eventful days ＼(^o^)／I had so much fun that time went by in a flash…just like a live show😂

I'd like to look back on these two fun days and share a lot of photos with you! First, I'd like to talk about the Day 1 event which took place in the evening😊Here's the meal I've been looking forward to for a long time! Huge tempura!! 🍤🍤🍤 So crispy!! A variety of amazing dishes!! 😭✨Take a look at this big ~Menu~. I'm so happy that we were able to do justice to the tour name by having so many different courses😊

I am saying my greetings to all participants of Day 1✨Cheers!! ♪(^^)o∀∀o(^^*)♪ Everyone seemed to enjoy their meal which made me very happy♪ We were all divided into groups at each table. Since there were a lot of solo attendees, I wondered what it would be like for them~?😳 Even though, some of them were meeting each other for the first time, everyone seemed to enjoy pouring drinks for each other and chatting. I was relieved to see you getting along with each other😊As expected, all my Botanical companions are full of kindness!! ＼(^o^)／Thank you!! ＼(^o^)／💕

We all got to enjoy the night view of Odaiba while feeling the night breeze on the boat♡ On that day, it was pretty windy and rainy in the morning so I was quite worried about our little boat trip…😱 I couldn't help but feel anxious💦 But just in time for the boarding, we were able to see the most beautiful sunset once the sky had cleared up a bit. The temperature was just right with a nice breeze. I think everyone enjoyed watching the sunset while waiting for the boat…😊(I was secretly watching everyone on board from afar and waving at you.) Anyway, I'm glad it was sunny😊💕

Here's a picure of Rainbow Bridge as seen from the houseboat🌉 And he Fuji TV building was shining brilliantly📺 There were many houseboats all around us ♪

We did a Q&A corner! It was fun😂But of course, the best thing about this houseboat was karaoke!! After boarding, we distributed a song list to everyone, and each table got to choose one song they wanted to hear. They all wrote their request on a little board we provided🌟(Here's one of the request boards. A fan drew this cute picture!) Here I am during the karaoke session🎤The song choices were well-balanced and varied, which was fun. Unfortunately, we all struggled a lot with the karaoke machine on Day 1🤣 I didn't know that I had to "select the original key," so I was confused when I kept getting a key that was too low for my voice. As for the microphone, I wanted to sing close to the speaker, but there was always feedback…It was difficult to find a goof position that didn't cause any trouble💦After a lot of trial and error, I ended up singing with my back facing the audience😂😂 Sorry to everyone behind me…😭😭Actually, the mystery was solved the following day. It seems that the houseboat karaoke machine is designed for people to sit while singing. Makes sense if you think about it. But at that time I wasn't able to figure it out at all🤣 That's why every time I stood up to sing, I got this horrible feedback *sobs*. But eventually, I found a good position that worked for me so I didn't leave that spot for the remainder of the karaoke session🎤At the end of Day 1, I found a wonderful message by a fan…😭✨A rabbit and sharks🦈🦈Thank you for the message😊

I chose this yukata for Day 1 because the yellow flowers were cute🌼I used a gyoza ornament for the obidome🥟This is actually a gyoza magnet that I received from a fan. I had it attached to my obidome🥟My manager actually helped me put on the yukata‼ ️＼＼\٩( 'ω' )و //／／Some of the participants came to the event in kimonos and yukatas, it's amazing that you can put them on by yourself…😳 I'm jealous��

All right, that was Day 1 of my “Join Wakana! Houseboat Full-Course Tour” ･:*+.(( °ω° ))/.:+ Next time I'll write about the event on Day 2 which took place during the daytime.

~To be continued~

Last but not least! Today, the key visual for "Wakana Classics 2024", was released, so I thought I'd talk a little bit about it here ♡ Sorry for the sudden departure from my houseboat stories😂For the photo shoot, I got to wear a beautiful dress again✨ It was raining really hard that day but thanks to my photographer who always brings the sun with him, it ended up being sunny! 😍 I'm glad we were able to take many pictures outdoors surrounded with greenery🌿 Actually, the composition of this key visual is pretty much the same as the one for my May live. I'm even looking in the same direction😊 This year, I was able to safely celebrate my 5th Anniversary as a solo artist. I'm looking towards the future, at all the things that I believe await me beyond today, "sono saki e". Believing that there is an even bigger world waiting for us "beyond," gives me the courage to continue to forge ahead with all of you. Please continue following me‼️＼＼\٩( 'ω' )و //／／

Well, that's all for today! Until next time~☆( '▽')/

＊＊＊Wakana＊＊＊

2024/09/28 Wakanaとみんなで行って来た！屋形船でまんぷくに！！〜二日目の巻〜

❗This is Fan Club EXCLUSIVE content❗ ❗PERSONAL USE ONLY❗ ❗Do NOT SHARE on other sites❗ ❗Join her FAN CLUB! Check out my detailed TUTORIAL ❗

Let's All Go Together! On A Houseboat Full-Course Tour!! 〜Day 2

Well, today I'd like to talk about Day 2 of “Join Wakana! Houseboat Full-Course Tour”! This time, the event took place around noon‼︎＼＼\٩( 'ω' )و //／／It rained from the morning on this day as well (why!😂) and I wondered what would happen but thankfully…the sun came out just in time！！ ！ ！ ＼(^o^)／The view from the houseboat was the same Odaiba area, but during the day, it was completely different from the previous night's view. Such a refreshing blue sky! The Rainbow Bridge♪ And Fuji TV📺Look at those beautiful clouds…😍The sun was bright, but there was a lovely breeze, very pleasant〜😊

On the second day, I wore a grape🍇 patterned yukata🤗 Here I am filming something for my FC video section! 🎥 (please be patient and wait a little while longer)

My Botanical companions of Day 2 were watching over me with smiles on their faces😂Thank you everyone〜😆Here's a photo of everyone on the boat on Day📸Cheers‼️♪(^^)o∀∀o(^^*)♪ Everyone was just as energetic as during Day 1‼︎😊I'm actually jealous that you were all drinking alcohol in the daytime😍 (I just had oolong tea!) Once again I was looking forward to the freshly fried tempura!! 🍤💕I was so happy to see them bringing out all the delicious fried food…😭✨

It goes without saying that we were able to enjoy the view outside better than at night. I was also surprised at how fast we were going😳 I had a blast eating amazing food and looking at the gorgeous view 😊(Here's a lovely photo taken by my manager📸 Kind of looks like Spirited Away)

On Day 2, I finally learned how to use the karoake machine properly so I sang while sitting in the request karaoke corner😂I tried a few different sitting positions *laughs* Look at my half-sitting posture🤣🤣So innovative! I got to sing in a great place again😁🎶I wonder if it's okay to have karaoke sessions like this more often? Where I can just casually do whatever I want🎤*laughs* Sorry to everyone who only got to look at my back😂 I got another cute picture drawn on one of Day 2's request boards😊Amagi-Goe by Sayuri Ishikawa! It was fun to sing enka in front of everyone for the first time🎤

At the end of both days, there was a big raffle corner in which I gave away parts of my precious Pothos to two people each day! It's growing fast so I have to cut it regularly. It was the perfect timing to cut off a few parts for you😊 I actually bought my Pothos baby at "Shibuya Engei". My trip was featured in Botanical Tsushin Vol.12! Page 17!! (Look how tiny it was!😳By the way, the pot in the photo has since been repurposed for another baby of mine, a plant called Agave Titanota🌱) If you put a cut part of my Pothos into water, this is what will happen…! ＼＼\٩( 'ω' )و //／／Once the roots have grown, you can just change the water about once a month (it's okay if you forget to do it occasionally) By the way, I did an experiment to see if roots would grow from just the leaves, and they did! ＼＼\٩( 'ω' )و //／／That's amazing 😳To the four people who won parts of my Pothos, please take care of them and let them grow 😊💕And please don't worry, it's okay if they die! Plants are sensitive to their environment, so they die all the time! But once they find a place they like, they'll grow really big! I hope you have fun growing plants‼ ︎😍Everyone else, if you're interested, please also try growing a Pothos🌿

Finally, here are some of my stuffed animals. I had them on display all over the boat! So cute~🤤💕🐙🦈I put a lot of them around the karaoke machine too🦈In fact, I also placed a Kaito Kid plushie all the way in the back (￣▽￣) Thank you everyone for the fun time over the course of those two days‼ ︎‼ ︎‼ ︎･゜ﾟ･:.｡..｡.:･'(ﾟ▽ﾟ)'･:.｡. .｡.:･゜ﾟ･

It was my first time planning an event like this but we all had fun eating, talking about all sorts of things, taking pictures, singing songs… It was great😂I also got a lot of presents from you…😭✨My Botanical companions are always so kind and warm, you make my heart feel at ease😊Thank you so much!!! I'll keep thinking of more fun fan club activities for you! ! ! ＼＼\٩( 'ω' )و //／／Hopefully we can get back together soon!!

〜The end〜

Today, the advanced ticket lotteries on various ticket platforms for "Wakana Classics 2024" have started! 🎻🎹🎶Let's spend time together surrounded by music at Wakana Classics at the end of yet another year ('▽')

[Date] December 18th; Open at 17:45 / Start 18:30 [Venue] Hamarikyu Asahi Hall (Music Hall) [Performers] Vocals: Wakana Music Director/Piano: Sin (Hashimoto Shin) Violin: Yanagihara Yuya Cello: Nishikata Masateru

And since this concert marks the end of my 5th year as a solo artist, I decided to create a special music box to commemorate the anniversary‼ ︎･:*+.(( °ω° ))/.:+ The song is "Sono Saki e"😊 I told the team I'd like to have a design inspired by stained glass. They really did a great job with the pattern on the top and the illustration in the box😭✨I hope you will enjoy this commemoration of my 5th Anniversary. Matching the title of the song "Sono Saki e"🌟, I'd like to convey all my thoughts for the future with this.

[Pre-order] Wakana 5th Anniversary "Sono Saki e" music box

And finally! I'd like to remind you of the submission deadline for this month's podcast talk theme!! ＼＼\٩( 'ω' )و //／／This time the main topic is "Everyone's Rules of Healthy Living"! Do you take a walk every day? Or do you drink anything special?! Maybe you always try to remember to smile? Things like that...Please let me know what you all do to stay healthy😉

▼Next talk topic -Everyone's Rules of Healthy Living -Any Questions for Wakana https://wakana-fc.jp/answers/botanical_oshaberi_14/new

So, that's it for today!! Until next time~☆( '▽')/

＊＊＊Wakana＊＊＊

[catsacrossthemultiverse]

More art of In Claws and Time!!! We've got more character designs!!! Redrew one of the in-game scenes! IN STARS AND TIME SPOILER WARNING!!! Optional act 3 content!!!

That one scene where Siffrin absolutely mauls the tutorial sadness!!! I just really liked the art of it and wanted to draw it myself. Also!!! Good excuse to get the full party together!!!

Scribble is the character taking Siffrin's place, Cauli is the one taking Bonnie's place, Leaverc is the one taking Odile's place, Tiger is the one taking Isabeau's place, and Windy is the one taking Mirabelle's place!!!

Fun fact!! Only two out of all five characters shown here are actually my characters and designs, the other three belong to my friends!! Can you guess who's mine?

[palmtreesx3]

Act 3 - Getting Lucky

Praise Kink (Robin's Chapter)

&lt;- Previous Chapter || Next ->

Series Masterlist

Get in the mood for this installment:

Series Playlist

Praise Kink Mood Board

Series Summary: (11.2k)  Fall is settling in in the Windy City, and Steve and Robin are swept up in their overthinking. The pair are left to their own devices at the shop while Murray is off traveling to Sex Toy conventions. Robin and Alex have grown closer and are the perfect pair, but Robin’s growing a bit of a complex because the relationship isn’t quite a s reciprocal as she’d like, so she calls in the reserves to give her the tutorial she needs to overcome her trepidation and dive right in. In order to repay Steve for his thorough tutorial, the girls start to meddle, because if they can see one thing, it’s that Steve loves a good self-sabotage. Everyone’s a little concerned over the opinions of others and seeking praise and reassurance in all the wrong places, so grab a cozy blanket, be a good girl and enjoy this chapter of Get Off. 

Warnings: it's a sex shop and generally just NSFW so 18+. Sex paraphernalia, dildos of all variety, sexual innuendo aplenty, eating pussy and explicit descriptions of said act, dirty talk and praise kink, allusions to jerking off.

“I swear to Christ. ROB! I know you have it!” Steve shouts out as he’s pacing through the apartment corridor looking everywhere but nowhere all at once. The pacing was more of a nervous habit, looking like a mother who is trying to walk off her frustration before she loses her cool on her lovely, doe eyed child after they broke the expensive family vase. Speaking from experience as the boy who knocked over said vase…he’s probably picked up a few mannerisms from his mother, now that he thinks about it. Back when she had time for him. He shakes his head in annoyance - at Robin and his childhood - hands flailing in the air above his head “You gotta fuckin stay out of my closet!”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Steve.” Her head pops out of the bathroom, looking down the hall at her friend who is zipping between his room and hers. 

“You still have BOXES in there Robin. BOXES. We’ve lived here six months. SIX. We’ve gone through an entire season. It’s fall now. Please for the love of God, unpack your things. How do you find anything in there?”

“I know where my things are, thank you very much. I just happen to enjoy some of the things from your closet, so sue me.” 

Steve is exasperated with his friend. He has been dealing with Robin encouraging him to spend every last extra dollar he has after bills, beers at Benny’s and whatever else they do to fill their time to buy new clothing because his “style is like a billboard asking for abstinence in this city,” yet she is sticking her nose in there every other day stealing pieces of clothing he’s had for years. “One man’s trash is another lesbian’s treasure” she tells him every time he bitches about the double standard. 

“I fuckin told you. Hands off the yellow sweater. Off limits. That and this jacket….they’re NOT getting traded in. They are not fair game. Got it?” he’s glaring at her, one hand on his hip, the other holding up a steely gray Members Only jacket she still can’t believe hasn’t been ruined from all of the bullshit it’s been through back at home. 

“Yeah yeah, It’s a great layering piece, can you even blame me? How do you even still have that thing, anyway? Like, how wasn’t it ruined after Billy clocked you right in the nose?” 

“ROBIN. SHUT UP!” he shouts, storming off to his room to get ready for their shift. 

“Love you too, Dingus!”

Robin finishes readying herself for their afternoon at work, stepping out of the bathroom after perfectly smudging her imperfect eye pencil and adding a red lip that rivals the auburn in her hair. Fiery undertones just like the girl. Her lips, her hair, her personality - they all match her new red Doc Martin boots that she’s really just awful complaining about. She heard all about it - how hard it was to break those fuckers in. Got some tips from the Queens at The Rainbow Room that she’s gone back to now for shows numerous times since that first night. Alex asked her upwards of 10 times if she was sure she wanted them and if she was ready for the commitment to breaking them in so they don’t lay dead like a fashion sacrifice at the back of her closet. Told Steve all about how she was going to push through and how it couldn’t be that bad. 

Well…it was. It was that bad - and Robin is not built to stick it out. She’s not formulated to power through. The problem is, she wants to wear them. Needs to wear them. They look good. So she settles on the only thing she’s ever been able to do to distract her from her pain (emotional and physical) and that’s: Never shut up and complain about it non-stop but only to Steve and take her entire bad mood out on Steve. Needless to say…Steve is tired. 

Steve is in the kitchen, two brown bags perched on the counter top. “Apple or banana Robbie?” he asks, holding up one of each in the air. “Banana. Definitely.” she smirks, as he tosses it in the bag, labeled with scrawling chicken scratch Robin along the front in pen. She leans against the counter as he wraps up two sandwiches, tosses in some snacks and folds over the bag before handing it to her. 

“Thanks mom.”

Steve doesn’t grace her with a response. He just rolls his eyes as he tosses on his jacket and grabs his keys. “Let’s go, loser. And don’t drag your feet in those boots. Pick them up and fuckin walk. We got a shift to get to.” 

The lock clanks as Steve opens up the front door and clicks on the neon sign in the window to designate the shop is open for business. Murray handed Steve the keys last week before he headed off to Las Vegas for an annual Adult Industry Product Conference. Showed Steve the brochure for Sensual Revolution '93 and told him "Maybe I'll bring ya along next year, big boy. Just take care of my baby while I'm gone and you never know! I might just upgrade you from Sex Shop Employee to Sex Shop Supervisor."

Not that Steve had aspirations to move up in the world of The Hideout and make a career out of it, but if Steve could tide off his father a little longer by being able to tell him that he's a Retail Supervisor that might buy him a little more time without hearing about how bullshit his work is. 

"We're open Rob! I'm gonna go restock the shelves in the back." 

"Yeah buddy. I got the register! I still can't believe that massive rush on massage oils last week. I still wanna know what sparked that… " she trails off. 

Everything seems fine for the rest of the morning until the loud hiss of  a massive delivery truck arrives out front, blocking up the narrow lanes of the city streets, horns honking and shouts out the passenger side windows starting immediately. Robin perks up, setting all four legs of her wooden stool back on the ground. 

“Uh, Dingus? Are we expecting a delivery?”

“No…what are you talking about Robin?” Steve shouts from his spot, crouched down in the back stocking the lower shelves. He hears the bell ding, and just as he stands up to peer out and what’s going on he sees the delivery hat of a man at the counter and the expansive vista of the biggest delivery truck he’s ever seen show up at the shop covering every inch of space their front windows have to offer. 

Robin's eyes widen as she reads the delivery slip, "Urgent: Assorted dildos for The Hideout."

She bellows out a laugh, not once looking up from the packing slip she still holds in her hands. “Steve. The man says you need to sign for these.”

“What the fuck is it Rob?” And with that, she silently extends the paper out to her friend. He snatches it quickly as she holds back her chuckling, rumbles leaving her nose that emanates in the back of her throat. His eyes scan the form until he gets to the bottom, reading the slip he does a double take. with an unexpected, jaw-dropping inventory of various dildos, more than they could ever imagine.

“I’m not…I can’t sign for this! He didn’t say a goddamn thing about any delivery let alone this! It can’t be right. Nope…. I…no.”

Steve’s still rambling a bit as he walks out the front door to the truck, along with the driver. Robin’s lips are curled up in a permanent smile as she chomps on her doublemint gum, getting the worlds biggest kick out of watching Steve pacing back and forth on the concrete, hands alternating between flailing in the air and resting on his hips in a stance that looks both like dominance and defeat all wrapped into one. 

Before long, Steve comes barreling through the front door, pushed open by force with both hands, finding them raised up by his ears in surrender and shaking his head in irritation. “They’re bringing them in Rob. It’s 10 pallets. 10 PALLETS OF DILDOS. I don’t even know where we’re gonna stick all these dicks. Jesus.”

“TEN? What the fuck? What happened?”

“Apparently Murray’s having a grand old time in Vegas. Did a little bulk ordering at the conference. Got them shipped direct and told the company Harrington’s got em.” his face scrunches up as he mocks Murray’s intonations. 

“No…it’s fine. It’s cool. We’ve got it. We’ll figure it out.”

“Steve…for two people who have never handled that much dick in their entire lives, I’m a little skeptical.” 

“No, no…if Murray were here…what stupid shit would he have us doing?”

And with that, Steve sets off. He immediately figures that Murray would be blasting off directions for him to unload the goods, so after ripping open the wrapping of the pallets himself…he instead naturally gives that job to Robin. Figuring Murray wants to offload the old inventory, Steve gets some sale information ready and decides to mark down everything on the floor - sure as shit that Murray got some new and improved models, fancier faux cocks, better colors, better…whatever bells and whistles. He doesn’t care really…he just needs to make room. 

After running off a huge stack of flyers on the copier in Murray’s office, he tells Robin he’s heading out. With a groan from the girl that echoed in the storeroom, he promised he’d return with a fresh cup of coffee and her favorite muffin if she’d just shut the fuck up about it. “But Steeeve” she groans “I can’t look at any more of these. Look at this one! It’s an actual monster cock. It’s got tentacles!”

“Aw, ew, gross.” his nose scrunches up and he turns on the balls of his feet, the new black chucks already fading a bit since they’re suddenly all he’s wearing - the red swoosh of his Nike Cortez’ tucked back a little further in his closet than they’d ever have been before. He jogs out the front door, stack of thin copy papers tucked as best he can under his arms, 

It’s a warm fall day today, sun heating up the streets in the warmth of the afternoon, as he maneuvers the busy city sidewalks, tails of his unbuttoned shirt trailing behind him, a well-worn black band t-shirt he picked up from the Goodwill downtown tucked into his denim. He almost didn’t pay any mind to the shirt as he scoured for his size in the bin laid out before him, but threw it on top of his pile anyway after reading the band scrawled across the front - Pearl Jam. 

Steve’s on a mission. He’s trying to get down the street to some of their notorious partners so he can tack up a flyer on their community board, or leave a stack of them at their bar or with the bouncer. Anywhere he knows won’t turn up their nose at a rudimentary flyer boasting discounted dildos. He makes a mental note to insist that Hopper and Joyce leave some on the bar at Benny’s even though he knows at least Hopper will bitch about it nonstop. He knows Joyce’ll look at him like a doting mama before scowling at her counterpart and telling the boy Whatever you need, honey.

He doesn’t see you until you’re right on top of him, and to be fair, you didn’t see him either. So when your chests connect in a thump and everything the both of you are carrying falls to the gritty sidewalk, both of your first instincts are to bitch about it. “What the fuck is your problem man, y’wanna watch where you’re going next time?” you scowl.

Before he could even get the snarky words out of his mouth, he says your name and you snapped out of it in an instant. “Oh God, Steve. It’s you! Sorry, I…I’m just in a fuckin’ mood today. I’m knee deep in midterms and I really just don’t want to read another essay about family dynamics and how my dads expectations really fucked me up - y’know?”

“Yeah, oh I know. I mean, not about the grading essays thing, but…about the dads expectations fucking you up. That part I can relate to. Not the smartie pants stuff.”

“Ok, well…” Your eyes roam up and down his face, seeing how scatterbrained he looks, now crumpled wads of paper crushed up against his chest. “We’ll unpack that little tidbit another time, then. Haven’t seen you in a few weeks. Maybe some coffee again? That shop by your place was nice last time we met up. Good music spinning, so - y’know they got me hooked.” 

Steve nods in agreement. After that night in the cab, you’ve seen eachother a few times. Nothing crazy, but intentionally. First you met up at the record store so you could show him some other albums he might like. The next time, you went back to the ice cream place from that ill-fated date night because for some reason, ever since then, you’ve been jonesing for a scoop of that peanut butter swirl ice cream and ended up sitting for two hours just talking. 

The last time, he invited you to their favorite coffee shop, sat at a table just adjacent to where Robin and Alex sat, scooping the foam off of one anothers cappuccinos and lattes with their fingers, ankles tangled together under the table, clearly whispering and staring at the pair of them and doing an awful job of keeping their voices low as they spend the whole time making conjecture about what exactly is going on here with the two of them. 

Robin was nice, she seemed quirky and fun and Alex seemed like some of the angsty, take-on-too-much-responsibility type girls trying to stand out in the crowd at the University you’re teaching at - which basically means you know exactly how to socialize with her if need be. But since then, you’ve been so wrapped up in the start of your semester, taking on a bigger courseload than normal and getting wrapped right up in the happenings of the fall semester to keep up with anything but teaching and grading. 

Steve finally talks after a few seconds “Yeah, it’s really…been awhile. Thought you forgot about me.”

“No. No! Well…you haven’t forgotten about me huh?” Your eyes flick down to his shirt, the typography finally catches your eye, and you point to it with a smirk. 

“What do you have here, anyway?” You snatch one of the fliers off the ground as the autumn breeze starts to swirl it around at your feet. 

“It’s nothing! No…well. Our boss got a huge shipment in - like, HUGE and we have to make room…..on the floor. So….I’m running a sale.” 

“Oh hoh hoh, this is great. Is Robin working? I kinda need a break. Show me this shop of yours? Please? I gotta see the merchandise.”

He is absolutely dreading this. He knows he can’t say no to you. He’s been doing great those few times you hung out together, but he can’t deny that just thinking about you makes him sweat, and he has continued to - over and over and over again - indulge himself to thoughts of your voice, your face, your body as he loses himself in the tense grip of his fist. So you have no idea how much of a hold you have on the guy. Blissfully ignorant of the fact that you have him wrapped around your little finger. And he’s utterly embarrassed, because he knows it. Stupid Steve getting obsessed with another girl again. Convincing himself he’s in love. Yeah…

The pair of you walk through the door of the shop not long after that. The sounds of voices from the back room ring out, cackling laughter that is irrefutably Robin echoing through the store. Steve leads you back behind the curtain to see Alex sitting, entirely amused watching Robin lose her cool at every dildo she pulls from the box. Robin is there, sitting cross-legged, holding up a gigantic transparent pink dildo, wobbling in the air, her cheeks almost the same color as the jiggling member. “People fit THIS up there? Who LIKES that? I’ll…Look at this thing!” 

You immediately burst out in laughter and Robin looks up, beaming when she sees you. Eyes darting back and forth between you and Steve. “It’s not as bad as you think, Robin.” you say. Entirely too seriously, and Steve almost gives himself whiplash looking at you as you shrug it off and move closer to inspect the wares. “Ran into Steve on the street, saw you guys were having a sale and I HAD to see all the fuss.”

“Steve…lotsa stuffin’ the muffin gonna be going on after we sell those bad boys.” 

A litany of curses rolls off of Steve's tongue in response as he yells something about setting up a sale display in the front.

They all follow Steve out to the floor as he works up the display space. Robin slides over next to him and starts to help, setting a box filled to the brim, bulbous heads sticking out over the edge. She leans over into his shoulder so she can whisper “Stevie…your face is way too serious right now. The girl you like is here while you’re tossing around fake dicks. You gotta smile about it or…lighten up or something. She’s not gonna like your sourpuss face. I think I’m the only one that puts up with that”

“Rob…she's not.. I don’t - '' but he’s cut off by the whirr and buzz of a pile of vibrating dildos Robin has accidentally activated. Moving and bouncing while making an incredible racket against the glass top of the case, the dildos start toppling over the ones Steve has meticulously stacked already and buzzing right off the side of the case and onto the floor. The vibrating dildos are chaotically bouncing and toppling everywhere. “Shut up, you two!” Robin yells back at you and Alex sitting curled up in the seating area, faces red with laughter. 

Just then, a group of the shop's regular customers start trickling in flyers in hand, intrigued by the commotion. Robin, overwhelmed with the chaotic situation she herself unfurled, immediately goes to assist the customers, leaving Steve behind to deal with the cacophony of mechanical penises. To distract from the mess, Robin begins a rambling speech about the history and uses of various dildos, sharing more information than anyone asked for and with surprising accuracy and detail. The three of you all look on in amazement and curiosity as Robin suddenly transforms from a bumbling, blushing sexual idiot to this dildo encyclopedia in no time. 

“Hey! Ladies…watch this!” Steve picks up a few of the dildos and starts juggling them in the middle of the store with particular ease. In a rare moment where Steve shakes off the uptight strings that tie him up and hold him down, his effort to make things a bit more lighthearted, pay off. 

Everyone’s hollering and smiling and laughing, however, his juggling skills are far from perfect. After a good run, he misses one - a big sparkly silicone thing that starts bouncing wildly across the counter and lands with a smack and a slap in front of the customer at the register. Robin and the customer look down at it, mouths open in disbelief. 

Steve’s bracing himself to get yelled at by one or both of them, but instead both blow out a laugh they were holding back before the whole store erupts into amused giggling and full on laughing fits.

After the shop closes that afternoon, the four of you find yourself walking down the sidewalks, sky overcast with the October chill that creeps in at sunset to steal away the warmth and glow of the day. Standing in front of a bowling alley tucked away on a side street, Alex cocks her eyebrows at the others and says “How about we have some more fun?”

Knees knocking together as you and Steve sit shoulder to shoulder tying your ratty, overworn bowling shoes onto your feet, Robin and Alex return with drinks from the bar and plop down next to you. “Drinks on me tonight, assholes.” Robin proclaims happily - that is until Steve quips back “Good, you owed me for your stupid dead keychain pet again anyway.”

Narrowing her eyes at Steve’s, she ignores his commentary and quickly moves on. “Alright, two on two. Let’s see how bad this is gonna go!” She claps her hands and rubs them together in preparation. 

“Guess it’s you and me, huh?” You bump shoulders with Steve, “I promise, I’m not that bad, so maybe we have a shot.”

Over the next hour the group is rolling with fits of giggles and laughter after dropped bowling balls and rolls down the gutter and baskets full of bar popcorn, kernels falling at their feet as they talk. 

On one side, Robin’s begging for bumpers after four in a row has Alex taunting her to no end. Beers are refilled while Alex tugs on Robin’s belt loops to maneuver around her, palm running over the sliver of exposed skin on her back as she leans down to grab her ball. Cheers are shouted while Robin celebrates a Spare with a chaste kiss to the apple of Alex’s cheek. Comfortable silences are filled with her nervously picking at the strings jutting out on the frayed knee of Alex’s pants and filling the void by picking at the cuticles of her nails instead when Alex gets up to take her turn. 

On the other side, Steve has bumped into you twice. Once causing your ball to fall out of your hands and barely missing your feet. He’s gotten his arm tangled in his open flannel shirt as he tosses the ball, so he takes it off and hangs it over the back of the chair where you’re sitting, the sides of his fingers brushing against your shoulder as he moves away and eyes darting nervously when he hears a tiny scoff coming from Alex, whose eyes are fixated on him with amusement. You and Steve are faring well and scoring better than your counterparts, but every time you go to celebrate, the interaction falls flat - one going in for a hug while the other sticks two hands up for a high five, the next time going to the high five while the other jabs their fist in the air awkwardly. 

Alex slinks over towards Robin and whispers, “This…is fuckin painful.”

Over the crack of falling pins and music on the jukebox, Alex shouts over to you, “So how exactly do you know Steve?”

“Oh, yeah…honestly, we just ran into each other a few times. All very random really. Saw him first at the record store when he was getting his first vinyls. I was there picking up my new copy of the Pearl Jam one…I guess I kind of made the suggestion he try it out himself.”

Robin flits her eyes from Steve to you, now wholly making the connection on why Steve’s probably constantly playing "Elderly Woman Behind the Counter in a Small Town" late at night. Steve sees her gears turning and he tries to signal for her to drop it, but in true Robin fashion….she won't. 

“So wait, that’s how you met her?” she jabs her thumb in your direction while shouting at Steve.

“W-well, yeah I guess technically. I didn’t really even know your name until the cab thing like…a month later.” he says casually, directed at you even though it was Robin who asked the question. 

Looking at Robin’s blank stare, you fill in the blanks for her when Steve doesn’t continue. “Yeah. Well…Steve kind of knight-in-shining-armored me from a bad date one night. I recognized him from our run ins, but we still didn’t actually know each other at all, but he caught me at the tail end of probably the absolute worst date of the year. Dude made me pay for everything and left me to find a cab myself and I was just a fuckin mess standing there on the sidewalk trying to count my change after paying for dinner.”

“Oh, yes…Stevie loves to be the hero. Dontcha?” Robin pokes at his shoulder. 

“Well yeah, he really was. I definitely didn’t have enough cash for the cab so we shared one and had our first proper conversation, bitched about how awful first dates are - or dating in general, right? God it’s been the worst.” your words trail off as your brain is clearly rolodexing through all of the failures and wasted nights you’ve collected. 

Smiling at Steve as you say it, “We just kinda keep running into one another, so we’re just embracing it!” Steve nods in agreement, tight lipped smile pulling up on the left side, oddly quiet as he listens to you recount how you’ve found yourself here in his circle. 

“Hmm…cute.” Robin says, a little over exaggerated, as she unties the frayed shoelaces of her bowling shoes and walks up to the counter to return them.  

At the counter, Robin stands leaned over while Alex slips her hand in the back pocket of her wide leg denim. You and your teammate for the evening fall in line next to one another behind them, shoulder to shoulder again, looking over at one another, waiting to see who will talk first. 

“We really whooped their ass, didn’t we?” 

“Thanks for having me around today.”

You both spill out at the same time. Both agreeing with a nod and a smile, eyes locked together just as Alex and Robin turn around to face you and move out of your way. “You’re up, Romeo.” She winks as she reaches out to grab Alex’s outstretched hand and head towards the door. Steve watches as they tumble out of the entrance and the door closes behind them, the pair illuminated through the glass by the lights on the city street as his friend leans in to kiss her girlfriend, like some perfectly lit scene out of a movie. 

This all started because Steve tied the stem of the cherry from his Old Fashioned and set it casually next to his coaster in the bar. Gasps of "How didn't I know you could do that?" from Robin. 

“Wow. Wow. Honestly. Who knew Steve was such a Cunnilinguist over here? Fluent in Mumbling in the Moss.” Robin’s teasing, but her jaw is just about on the bar and she’s fighting back the impressed look she has on her face. “Let me get my notebook out. I gotta take notes…please, please don’t stop on account of me. Continue….”  Robin gestures at Steve in a bow like he’s a fuckin member of the Royal Court of Pussyeaters, taunting him with wide sarcastic eyes and a glint of actual curiosity he can clock from a mile away. 

“Robin, YOU have even said it yourself.”

“Oh yes, how could I ever forget the sounds Melissa from upstairs made on our first weekend here? Right. Sorry. Blocked that out of my memory bank shortly after it happened.”

The thing about Robin is, this city has made her feral for new things and new information. Probably something to do with the fact that she can actually live like she wants to more openly, that there’s less judgment or even a community. Maybe it's a lot to do with the fact that the girl who used to cringe at the word boobies is hawking condoms, crotchless panties and sex toys for a living and learning about her sexuality in real-time, but Robin has turned into a sexual sponge. She’s shy about something until she’s not. Zero to sixty in ten seconds flat. She sees it once, asks a few curious and direct questions and suddenly she’s ready to rock and roll. 

Over the past few months, Steve has watched her boundaries literally crumble at her feet. The first time it happened, early in the summer when they first got the job, he found himself sweeping the same spot in the front of the store for twenty minutes straight. He was completely distracted when Robin went on and on extremely enthusiastically about Ben Wa balls to a customer. 

At first he was lingering because the girl was pretty - shiny hair grazing the tops of her shoulders, sunkissed and peeking out of her tank top, glittering gems dangling from her ears. He was admiring the girl, until he heard Robin talking about those balls like she knew what she was doing. He hadn’t thought about those since he had that stupid sandwich shop slip up, but apparently since then, Robin has become a goddamn connoisseur. He almost dropped the broom when she gave the girl some of her favorite personal tips to enjoy them as she checked her out.  

Since then, Steve can’t even count on one hand how many times he’s had to hear Robin talking people’s ears off about fuckin Ben Wa balls. She’s like a Ben Wa sales person every night at the bar, yapping anyone’s ear off about them, talking about no less casually than like it’s talking about how you take your coffee. Just rambling on about how if you slip them in before your date, it pays off at the end of the night, or how if you add a little vibration they go wild. If she didn’t already work at a Sex Shop, he’d tell her to get a job at one with how she’s acting. Steve’s no prude, God no… but he doesn’t think he’s ever going to get used to his Robin talking about what she sticks up her vagina like that. 

So now, here they all sit, at the corner of the bar at Benny’s, and she’s trying so hard not to look like she’s desperate for a lesson, but Steve knows. He knows she’s trying so hard to get information. So she can deliver. She won't ever do something unless she's sure she'll be good at it. She won’t say it out loud, but she wants to return the favor and she’s terrified she’s gonna do it wrong or be awful at it. He knows all of this just by looking at her body language and the look in her eyes. And shit, it makes him cringe thinking about it, but when Hopper leans over the bar and says “I don’t think he’s really that good if he’s not gonna spill the beans? Pretty face like that has probably never been sat on in his life.” he’s all in. He’s not one to back down from a challenge. Stubborn as ever. 

“Well…You’re not exactly wrong about that. Not for nothing, though…I tried. I swear. Hawkins, Indiana is not filled with adventurous girls that are willing to do that.”

“Wait…who did you ask to sit on your face, Harrington? Do I even wanna know?”

“Don’t worry about it Robbie.” He waves her off. “It doesn’t matter anyway. No one took the bait so I stopped asking. Plus, most of those girls didn’t even want me to do any of it in the first place - I mean, after some convincing a few of them changed their opinion afterwards but still...”

“So…wait. You didn’t spend all your years as King Steve feasting on clams? That makes no sense? How can you even self-proclaim you’re soooo great at it if you don’t have that much practice?”

“First of all, I did just fine thanks, and secondly it’s not about practice, Rob. I’m a fuckin natural” Steve grins wide like a cheshire cat around the rim of his glass as he throws back a sip, knowing his comment will send her into a tizzy.

“Oh you’re just disgusting Steve Harrington. So fucking smug about everything.” As she rambles on, Steve lets her go, barely noticing that he’s not paying any mind to her, and he asks Joyce if he can have the jar of cherries behind the bar. Joyce smiles at him and winks, before sliding the glass container down the bar to him, catching it in his hand and wiggling it in Robin’s face. 

“You wanna learn from the best, Buckley?”

He hands his friend a cherry and asks her to tie the stem and the first one took her 18 minutes. She’s awful at multitasking, so while he’s trying to fill the time with tips - about how she shouldn’t dive right in. “You gotta play around a little. Show the girls some attention, work your way up her thighs… don’t just stick your face in it. Got it?” She doesn’t. She’s got her brows furrowed and one eye squinted shut as she’s exaggeratedly moving the cherry stem around her mouth by jabbing her tongue every which way. 

He rolls his eyes and holds his hand out in front of her mouth and tells her to spit it out, like a small child who got in the candy bowl and has to give up her treat after being scolded. The next hour goes by with Steve trying so hard to be a patient teacher. 

He starts from the beginning, making sure she doesn’t skip over his first lesson: Approach but do not enter. He tells her about how no matter how bad she wants to, she can not under any circumstances make full and direct contact. "If you use your tongue like you just did with that fuckin cherry stem you're gonna scare her, okay Jabby"

In an almost reverent and detailed narrative he continues on telling tales of kisses up ankles and legs and warm breaths against their entrance. Teasing and touching and tounging through wet panties. Featherlight touches and sucking purple marks along the juncture of thighs. At this point, Hopper is leaned over his bar looking on like a little kid hearing about knights and dragons in a bedtime story. He needs a napkin to wipe up his drool after listening to the pussy poetry coming off of Steve Harrington’s lips. 

Steve dangles out Cherry #2 for Robin to snag with her lips before moving on to his second lesson: Start slow. Robin has her mouth open catching flies, cherry stem just resting between her teeth as Steve goes on to explain how she should kitten lick just around everything she has to offer, then in. Gentle strokes exploring what’s there, tongue flat, loose, gentle. Circling the clit, running it along all of the places in between. “Opening up the flower,” he says. Bonus points if you make noise while you do it, tell her she looks pretty he says and Robin nods in understanding. 

Palm extended again, Steve nods as the stem falls into it, telling Robin “Nice. You’re getting there. This’ll be important soon.”

Cherry #3. Take a break. He looks her dead in the eyes when he says “You gotta take a break here, Robbie. Don’t do that thing you do about every other thing in the world. Where you’re all in and super focused and too excited and you forget the steps. BACK OFF. Do the thigh thing again, just less is more for a minute here….You hear me? Now gimme that stem.”

Robin pulls the stem out of her mouth, holding it up to her eyeline and sees her knot is tighter this time and she's done it quicker. Much quicker than before. She grins “Got it! Got it! Am I doing good?”

Steve smiles at her, and pops a cherry into his mouth, handing one off to his friend and grinning like a devil as he hands one to Hopper, too. Both take the offering, despite Hopper acting way too cool about it, he plays along. Cherry #4. Dive in. Swirl, slide and suck. Alternate until you figure out what works for her. Listen for the sounds, the breaths. Pick up speed. "Lay that tongue flat again and lick her up from back to front, because she's gonna taste like heaven." Robin nods as he tells her to add a finger or two if she wants it but keep playing with that clit, rolling and rubbing and maybe even some flicking just like that cherry stem. 

All three of them pull their stems out, candied cherries already warm in Robin and Hoppers bellies so they could focus on the stem. Steve, however, pulls out his stem to show off the tight knot and sticks out his tongue with the cherry still there, untouched and carefully maneuvered out of the way of the action the whole time. He makes a show of swirling around the cherry, undulating his tongue with a smirk turned up on the corner of his lips before popping the red orb between his teeth and crushing it with a grin. 

“Okay, fine. You sound like you know what you’re doing Harrington…that…yeah…thanks for that.” Hopper says as he walks away, turning his stem between his fingers, a little too deep in thought and mulling over Steve’s words as he serves up the other patrons of the bar. 

Stirring the ice of her now empty glass, she eyes her friend. Still processing that he gave her such a detailed lesson so she can effectively eat out her girlfriend for the first time, not to mention the fact that listening to Steve Harrington talk about worshiping a woman like that kinda turned her on, it takes her a minute to finally break her silence.

She looks away from Steve before starting in on one of her tried and true rambles. “I gotta repay you for that weirdly effective tutorial. Just maybe one nugget of information. I mean, I may have never been the giver, but consider me a receiver? A tight end? I dunno I was trying to give you a sports analogy because you’re a jock. Were a jock…or whatever. Anyway. Girls…they don’t agree to sit on your face, man, and it's not because they don’t want it. They want it. It’s just, like, REALLY embarrassing.”

Steve looks at her confused. “What do you mean embarrassing?” 

“Like, 100% of us think we’re too big or not good enough. And being like that is a little intimidating. Even my skinny ass thinks I’ll crush a girl if I do it. “ 

“Too big? - oh.” It takes some time for Steve to understand, never having to deal with any type of insecurity like that ever before it never even crossed his mind that it has anything to do with themselves or their bodies. He always thought they just thought he was a weirdo for asking and making things complicated. He assumed they didn’t have time for any theatrics and just wanted to come and maybe sign up for a second date. 

Robin sees the wheels turning and the gears grinding in his head, and she knows this means he understands but is too engrossed in his analysis of the actual injustice of it all to speak words. “So, maybe approach it differently? Or find a chick who is just so fuckin confident she doesn’t give a fuck. But let me tell you one thing…it pains me to say this. Truly it does, but your nose…is MADE for it.”

“My nose?” his face contorts in a confused glare she knows all too well. 

“Oh baby, yeah…that nose is made for pushing a clit around.” 

“ROBIN!” Steve pushes his chair back, feet squeaking along the roughed up floor of the bar, as he walks over to the jukebox and leans over it, grumbling yet again about how she always takes it one step too far.

“You’ll thank me one day, handsome! You’re not the only one that has information to share, you know?”

Steve has never seen Robin like this before. He’s not sure what to do with the information his eyes are transmitting to his brain in this moment, so he just stands there unmoving. “Uh hello? Dingus? What’s the deal?”

Robin has exited her room in those stupid fucking red boots that she now is insisting are comfortable and fully broken in, but the fishnet stockings that follow her skin up her legs are not the first thing that make Steve do a double take. A white baby t-shirt sits under the spaghetti straps of a lacey, silky black slip dress, a cut up to the thigh that she may have put there herself. A chunky, more masculine belt looped around her waist - wait…is that from his closet, he thinks to himself. 

“Please stop looking at me like I’m an idiot. I look dumb, don’t I? Of course I do. I gotta change.” 

The only other time Robin has found herself in anything other than pants was that one goddamn time Nancy Wheeler dressed her up like a China Doll to trick that fancy psychiatrist guy, and that’s a memory she’s tried hard to suppress.But there are no frilly socks and poofy white collars on this dress. No stuffy cardigan. And even though she never thought of herself as particularly feminine, today for the first time in her life she feels it.  

“No! No Robbie, you look … great. I - I’ve just never seen you in like…anything like that. It’s…super fuckin’ cool okay? Like magazine cool. Like not friends with Steve Harrington cool.” he shakes his head as he throws some popcorn into his mouth. “Alex is gonna fuckin’ lose it. You gonna remember what I taught you at Benny’s? Tonight is your night, my friend, because she will not say no to you in that. For sure.”

“You think I’m gonna dine on the Adult Happy Meal tonight?” She says in a sly, teasing tone, knowing just her sexual euphemism will get Steve rolling his eyes and irritated with her in no time. 

“Y’know what, I was trying to pump you up. Tell you you did good…but fine. Be that way.”

And she hated, just hated to admit it, but Steve was right. Alex loved it. She couldn’t tear her eyes away from Robin’s thighs all night. Her fingers lingered at Robin’s waist and along that belt anytime she was within reach and Robin’s skin tingled with anticipation. She felt possessed by Alex. On a short leash. And as the music thumped in her chest, she felt the dull aching throb building between her thighs at the same time. 

So it was no surprise when the two of them pummeled through Alex’s studio apartment door backwards, not taking their lips of one another with enough time to pay any attention to where they were going or what they were running into. Robin’s were slick with spit, cherry gloss and the smudges of the deep plum lipstick rubbed right off of Alex’s own plump lips. 

“This..” Alex picks at the straps of Robin’s slip dress. “This is nice.” She almost growls out, finger hooked under the thin piece of fabric, tugging Robin with her until they hit the edge of the bed. 

“I don’t think I told you how hot you looked tonight. It’s fuckin bananas.” Alex’s lips pepper kisses up the column of Robin’s neck leaving streaks of whatever pigment remained on her lips rubbed off like a trail of smoke, fanning the fire deep within both of them.

Alex’s nose is pressed up and into Robin’s temple, lips parted and breathy and tickling her ear. Tits smushed and pressed together the closest they could possibly be and Alex’s hand wastes no time slithering right into that opening left there by the makeshift slit cut into the side of the satin, up along her pelvis tugging the pesky fishnets out of the way and diving right back down into the hot wetness pooling in Robins’ underwear. 

“Oh, honey. Robin…so wet already?” Her fingers smooth back and front again, swirling around Robin’s clit and sliding right inside on the backswing. Robin chokes out a breathy moan, pouty lips gaping open, eyes rolling back and long eyelashes fluttering in the air like the wings of a butterfly. Alex slides those fingers back and forth, back and forth until Robin looks back at her, grabbing her by the shoulders and pulling her away just enough to look into her eyes. Alex doesn’t let up her motions, two fingers loudly moving through everything Robin is giving her. 

Robin reaches down towards the bed and takes Alex by surprise when she picks up one of her fluffy white pillows and pummels it at Alex’s head. “Ow, what the fuck!” Alex shouts. She looks at Robin, corners of her lips turning up into a mischievous smile, fingers curling up into the sky as she shrugs her shoulders teasingly. Alex’s face melts quickly into one of laughter - but only temporarily before she reaches for her own pillow and wails on Robin, smacking her right in the shoulder. 

Pillows are flying, both girls are laughing so much their tummies are starting to hurt. Fluff and feathers from the pillows are starting to puff out and flutter through the air. Robin lands a particularly good blow on Alex’s upper body that has her falling backwards into the bed laughing, and it’s in this moment Robin finds herself giggling, perched right on top of her girlfriend’s body.

She wanted this to happen. Really she did. That was the point. She’s come a long way but Robin is still too chickenshit to ask for what she wants in bed. She’s definitely too chickenshit to take charge. So as she lays here, leaning over Alex, pillows around them, blankets and comforters scrunched up along their sides in a sea of white linen, Robin leans down and connects her lips to Alex’s in the most possessive kiss she knows how to muster up. She spent all night feeling like she was on Alex’s leash, but for fucks sake, she wants to take a little too. 

She’s always a little frantic, but this? She’s tugging Alex’s shirt out from where it’s tucked into the pleated trousers hanging low on her hips tonight faster than she can blink. Her bumbling fingers are trying to find the confidence to be smooth about pushing her shirt up and up and up, but instead it’s just hurriedly shoved up far enough for Robin to get a little bit of access to her breasts. She slows down a bit just enough to savor how her fingers slide under the band of Alex’s bralette and brush over both of her nipples at the same time. 

God, Robin is losing her mind and she’s quickly going to get in her head if she doesn’t follow through. She knows that the second she lets her intrusive thoughts spiral, she’s going to be too worried about doing it wrong, or not being good enough that she’ll just run back home to Steve like a kicked puppy. So she takes a big breath - one that could be confused with someone diving down to the bottom of a summer swimming pool. Alex’s head pops up off the bed and is momentarily confused, but she falls right back into the mountain of pillows as she feels Robin’s hands extend, pressing her tits up and back into the mattress just as Robin’s nose starts to trail down, down towards her belly button. 

Kissing the softness of her girl's tummy, Robin tries hard to remember that this is not a test, before she keeps mouthing at the dough of her hips, dragging the waistband of her pants further and further down. Alex’s hipbone, popping out just for a peek, gets a small kiss from Robin before she swoops her finger down and into her trousers following the seam of her thighs. 

“Rob…Robin…what are you - oh fuck!” She cries out as she feels Robin’s blunt fingernails run up through her slit and back up, starting to fumble with the button. “Robin, what are you doing?”

Alex has felt great during this relationship, yeah she’s more of the giver, but there’s been plenty of grinding and sucking on nipples and self pleasure that have brought her to climax while the two of them have fooled around on couches and over the paper thin walls in their apartment as Steve sleeps next door. She’s been patient and attentive to Robin, knowing she’s still learning and exploring and not expecting her to do more than she’s comfortable with. But tonight she’s getting the distinct idea that Robin wants something a little different. 

“Rob, you don’t have to …just…lemme take care of it”

“NO. Alex. Stop it. I…I wanna try something. Okay? Please?”

“Oh-okay, sure. But just stop if it’s too much for you. I promise, I don’t need you to fingerfuck me tonight if you don’t really wanna go there yet.” Alex is talking while Robin ignores her, working the pants loose and starting to wiggle them down and over her wide and pretty hips. 

“Alex. Please. Shut up. I’m usually the one talking too much, but this time it’s you.” She connects her lips to whatever places she can reach on her stomach before looking back up at Alex, eyes wide and big and doe-like “And …I don’t want ot finger fuck you.”

With absolutely no notice after that, Robin’s head ducks down and quickly finds itself between Alex’s thighs, shoving the pants legs down as far as she can go while she runs her nose up along the edge of Alex’s deep purple panties. She hums loud enough for Alex to hear her and that alone has Alex’s eyes fluttering shut in anticipation.

 Robin starts with small nips and licks along the inside of Alex’s thighs and remembers specifically that a few good, deep licks over the panties might be a nice place to go next. It’s safe for her underneath a layer of protection - mostly for her ego. It’s like the mental boundary she has still standing before she takes her first real lick. But with a deep breath and a smile she quite literally can’t hold back, Robin flattens her tongue and runs it right up the center of Alex’s panties, flicking her tongue when she gets right where she knows her clit is hiding under that cotton. 

Alex’s hands jolt towards the bedsheets at the unexpected fervor on Robin’s tongue and the girl keeps exploring all around the exposed skin before taking the front of her underwear on her tongue, wrapping her lips around it and sucking, lapping, drooling right where she knows that clit is hiding from her. Alex is moaning and groaning under Robin and the sound is music to her ears - a symphony of praises like Robin has never quite heard before. She wants more. Needs more. 

Tugging down the sides of Alex’s underwear she rips them off and throws them on the floor behind her and stares down at what lays before her. Alex, bared to her, legs splayed out to each side. She can’t help but admire the pink shades of her lips and the perfect curls of the hair adorned there. She runs her fingers along the sides of her pelvis, tickling the pads of her fingers with the roughness of where her trimmed bush is growing in just a bit. Robin is pretty sure this is how a dog with a bone behaves, but she couldn’t care less. 

Next, she does something that even surprises herself. Rolling her tongue through her mouth, she gathers a glob of spit and lets it fall right on top of Alex’s clit, holding the hood back as the coolness hits her bundle of nerves. Robin blows gently on the wet skin, a small thread of saliva still clinging to her cupid's bow and Alex can not tear her eyes away from what is happening between her legs. 

Robin dips her head down and rolls her tongue, front to back, side to side before letting her lips wrap around her clit and suck. As she continues, flicking and flitting and moaning into Alex’s cunt, she lets her fingers wander up until she can feel the heat of her girlfriends arousal on her fingertips. She looks up at her and asks “Can I…can I put these in, too? Do you want more?”

“Jesus Christ, Robin” she gasps, “You’re trying to kill me right? Holy shit. Yes. I need more.”

Sliding her middle finger into her first, then second knuckle, just to test the waters, she’s quickly overcome with how soft and warm she feels in her hands. “Oh Alex, you feel so fuckin good.” She works that finger in further before sliding it out and adding in her ring finger, too. No resistance, only the slick sounds of Alex’s arousal and Robin's fingers working her up better than she knew was possible. 

Thanking god she knows how to play a brass instrument, knowing damn well her fingers and her mouth know how to multitask and move in tandem, she starts thinking about this orchestra between her girlfriends legs. Moving those fingers, not letting up with the beat and tempo she set for herself, she bends down to connect her soft lips back on Alex’s, lapping around the place she feels her fingers slipping in and out, licking along the edge of where her lips end and Robin’s fingers begin. Feeling the plunging and sucking around them as her pussy clenches around Robin’s fingers. 

“Ohhh fuck. Robin, goo-good girl, Rob. Feels so good.”

Robin feels her own pussy clench around absolutely nothing at Alex’s raise. Pulling out her fingers, Alex cries at the loss, but she quickly moans louder than Robin’s ever heard before as she replaces that emptiness with her tongue. Shoving it inside, curing upwards and soothing that ache with the warmth of her tongue. She remembers how she rolled and sucked on that cherry, and repeats those movements until she feels a wetness, a creaminess that makes her moan out loudly herself. The vibrations from Robin’s moaning are doubling down on the orgasm crashing through Alex’s body and with a yelp and a groan and a giggle, Robin has her head laying across Alex’s sweat slicked chest, staring up at her waiting. For approval? For literally anything. 

“Jesus, Robin that was….that was some top shelf shit. Wh-what…how? I mean, I’m not complaining but I was not expecting that.”

“It was fuckin’ hot wasn’t it?” she muses with a laugh.

“Lord help me, I…think you owe some thanks to Steve for all that, actually” she says painfully through her teeth. 

“No fuckin’ shit! My man!”

A scoff comes right out of Robin’s mouth, unable to hold it back.

“Maybe if he uses some of that magic pussy eating technique on whats-her-name she’ll be just as obsessed with him as he is with her.”

“RIGHT?”

The windows of the house are actually rattling, filled to the brim with young bodies living in downtown Chicago neighborhoods - friends and strangers alike. Robin and Steve stand outside waiting to enter, looking at Alex for the go-ahead. “I don’t really actually know the guys, it’s just….I mean it doesn’t fuckin matter. Look at this party.” she gestures up to the house, lights flashing from behind the curtains in the windows. “We just gotta wait another minute or two. I’m meeting someone else…”

“Someone else? Who else is coming?” Robin’s volume starts off loud and starts to fade into a smirk as she catches a glimpse of you approaching the group on the sidewalk. 

“Hey guys! Thanks Alex, I’m so glad I ran into you earlier!”

You clock the look Robin flashes at Steve and you almost feel slightly unwelcome if it weren’t for Alex, grabbing you by the crook of your elbow and pulling you forward into the house party, the duo still trailing behind trying to process what exactly is going on and why.

Robin jogs up to Alex’s side as they take the steps of the house two by two as they approach the door and leans in “What are you doing? When did this happen?”

Once through the threshold of the house, the loud music and shouting voices muffled their conversation with ease. “Oh whatever… listen, I ran into her at the coffee shop. Said after she went there with Steve that one time, she liked their Cappuccino so she’s been going back ever since. It was my chance to invite her out…maybe give them a nudge. I swear, I owe the guy after all that lip service last night.”

“You’re trouble, you know that? He thinks I’m trouble…but…”

“Maybe we're trouble together. Let’s go.”

Alex grabs Robin’s hand and trots off to the back of the house in search of a few drinks, trying desperately to lose both of you behind them and force you into close proximity. 

As planned, Steve can’t find the pair anywhere in a matter of seconds, searching over the heads and raised drinks of strangers on the living room, repurposed as a dance floor, it quickly becomes futile. In the loud atmosphere, The Rolling Stones Start Me Up blaring from the speakers, he turns to you, unable to get a word in and get you to move forward with him in search of a drink, he tugs at the collar of your blush pink jacket - one that makes him smirk because he recognizes the ribbed collar and button clasp of the zipper jacket. Looking just like his own matching gray one, shoved in the back of his dresser lately in an effort to try and hide it better from Robin. 

An hour or so passes and Steve still hasn’t found Robin, not without trying because his eyes are constantly scanning the crowd, like a lifeguard scanning the water keeping children safe. She’s fine. It’s not my problem to babysit her, he thinks. She’s got Alex.

He’s still with you, leaning against the wall and watching as you dance along to every song that plays for the crowd. Right now, he’s got his eyes glued to your hips as you move along to Owner of a Lonely Heart and sip your lukewarm beer. 

You occasionally speak to him, but fuck if he actually has heard a thing you said. You haven’t stopped moving along to the music. It’s warm inside, so he’s holding your jacket now, while he sees the sweat dripping down the nape of your neck. Following it as it drips down and around the column of your throat. 

He clears his before he lets himself watch it go any lower, over your clavicle and jerks his head in the direction of the kitchen. “Refill?” he asks, and you nod as the crowd chants out CAN'T TOUCH THIS, jumping in unison and making the floor shake. 

Armed with your fresh drink, you find yourself following Steve down the steps of the basement, concrete walls and dusty corners, a basement not meant to be inhabited but perfect for a late night party full of friends and strangers for whoever actually lives here. The pair of you plop down on a dingy sofa, rifling through your purse you pull out a black package and slide a slim black cigarette out if it’s case. He looks at you quizzically as you light it up, the warm and spicy smell of your Djarum Blacks filling the air around you. 

“A clove.” you exhale. “A clove cigarette? You want?” you pull one more drag off the cigarette and pass it off to Steve, who studies it before placing the filter to his lips. Pulling a drag, feeling something like cinnamon crackle through his lungs, his brain is fixated on how your lips were just right here where his are now. 

“Whoa, that's…different.” He coughs out. “I like it, though. It feels…like…cozy? Does that make sense?” 

Taking another drag and blowing out his smoke in one smooth motion this time, he hands it back over to you. Nodding and looking one another over as you pass the clove back and forth for a few minutes in comfortable silence, you’re broken out of your little bubble by the sound of cheating and squealing from the other side of the basement. A squeal that is unmistakably Robin.

The thump of the base echos against the damp and dirty cinder block walls and you and Steve turn the corner to see Robin, perched on top of an old wooden table, swaying and dancing, tank top straps falling off her shoulder as she sways to the beat 

Rhythm is a dancer. It's a soul's companion. You can feel it everywhere.

Robin is clearly shitfaced, as she falls to her knees and gyrates on top of the table, you hear Steve groan and he runs his hands through his hair before he goes to step forward. Putting your hand on his shoulder to stop him, he looks back at you confused. “She’s got it.” you gesture to Alex, who's standing there looking mildly concerned, while also letting her pretty girl have some fun. 

His protective nature is more evident than ever right now, and it warms you to see it. You’ve only ever really witnessed the snarky jabs and biting remarks that seem to be what their friendship is built on. The concern and softness on his face here is different. Maybe it’s not so much that he wants to be the hero - you remember Robin’s remark the other day at the bowling alley. Maybe he just…cares. 

The crowd around the table is cheering and egging Robin on the entire time, only shouting louder as EMF’s Unbelievable switches on, causing Robin to lose her footing. Shaken up, she reaches for Alex, a dazed look in her eye, while her girlfriend throws her arm over her shoulder and they head towards the stairs. “I’m taking her home. She’s a damn mess. A cute one, but a mess.” Alex says to Steve as she passes him on her way up the stairs. 

You and Steve trail behind, Robin’s lolling head looking like a ragdoll thrown over Alex’s back. “You sure you don’t need my help?” Steve asks. 

“I got it pretty boy. Just…do a welfare check on my girl in the morning. I swear if she wakes up in a pile of her own vomit though - that's on her.”

And just like that, you find yourself the recipient of Steve’s care and concern, as he looks at you on the corner of a quiet midnight street. “Gotta get you home safe too. C’mon.” Holding open your jacket for you - the one you almost forgot he’s been holding for you this whole time - you step inside. He wraps it gently around your shoulders, fingers lingering a bit softly just before he notices and gives you an awkward pat on them instead. 

“Are we walking, or are you gonna make me get you a cab again?” he teases. 

You roll your eyes as you start walking away. “My place isn’t far. Just this way. Y’gonna make sure I get there okay?”

Nursing hangovers and sore bodies the next morning, the pair have their feet sprawled out across their respective couches, curtains drawn tight keeping out the golden October sunlight, hoodies tied up around their heads keeping the noise out and the light dim. Robin gnaws on a bagel, untoasted, uncut just straight from the bag like a heathen while she is mumbling about what she and Alex have been up to lately. 

Steve’s head is hurting, but he really is happy to hear how supportive Alex is of Robin and all the cool things they are doing. He wants to hear more about it even though it feels like her voice is driving one hundred screws directly into his brain stem, so he tips back his bottle of water and tries to focus in. 

“We went to this sick basement venue the other night - the music scene there was so cool. You might have liked it Steve. I hear that vinyl collection you have spinning. I have to say, I’m impressed with your blossoming musical taste.” 

Just then, he’s hit with a chunk of bagel right on his forehead. Begrudgingly he lets the hunger win out, and takes a bite, needing something to sop up the hangover but too lazy to go down to the corner store for a proper greasy breakfast sandwich. 

“Might that have anything to do with a pretty lady who teaches at the University? Hmmm?” 

He can already tell Robin wants to lecture him. He doesn’t want to hear it. He knows what she's going to say, and maybe that’s the problem. Maybe he knows what she’s going to say because it’s not really that wrong, and he just doesn’t want to admit any of it or unpack any of it. Why do that when it’s going to blow up in his face anyway? What’s the point in getting his hopes up if he can just play it cool and casual and make like he’s not phased by it when it inevitably doesn’t work out. 

Steve already had his head running through this himself. The facts are, you are not a stupid girl and you’re not rolling around the city looking to settle down with some schmuck who juggles dildos at his day job. That’s pretty clear. That date that blew up in your face? That was at a nice restaurant. It was a serious date - or at least it should have been. Steve’s a 26 year old boy running around the city like it’s a playground trying to find himself and you’re an almost 30 year old woman with a career and a personality who is just way out of his league. 

“Robin, it’s… complicated.”

“No, no. I’m not seeing what exactly is complicated about it. She’s so COOL. Steve - this is exactly what you need. I don’t know why you will constantly throw yourself like a hotdog down a hallway at anything else that looks at you for a second, but these ones that are good for you. …ACTUALLY good for you, you pretend like it’s a pipe dream?”

With that, they are both startled at the bell yelling out from the phone on the wall, neither expecting a phone call this time. They both look at one another before Robin sighs, pushing herself to stand and clicking the buttons of her Tamagotchi on her leisurely walk over to the receiver. Picking up the phone and laying the handpiece on her shoulder, she continues her focus on caring for her beeping blob, dead set on winning this round before Steve watches her face go white as a ghost. 

Her eyes are boring into his, he’s mouthing What’s wrong and he gets nothing in response. His anxiety is swirling in his chest. It’s the kids isn’t it? He can’t help but immediately think that they are in imminent danger. He’s up and walking over, mentally ready to pack a bag and start the drive home before Robin silently hands the phone out to him. 

“It’s for you.” she says, stone faced and looking at him with pitiful eyes. 

Steve answers, a serious and curt hello into the phone when a familiar voice rolls out of the earpiece that makes him freeze. 

“Son… Can you please explain to me why someone would be telling me these astronomical stories about you - a Harrington - working at a Pornographic Store?”

Shit. 

TAGLIST: @livsters @katie-tibo @johnricharddeacy @angywritesstuff @k-k0129 @tisthedamnseason69 @middle-of-the-earth @thebrazilianatheist  @mochminnie @micheledawn1975 @falling-throughthe-hourglass @rafaaoli @ash5monster01 @gabessock @onyxslayss @scoopshxrrington

[unetherian]

hi i’m very very new to the community and just trying to figure myself out! do you have any general resources for people new to the therian/alterhuman community?

also, do you have tips for a mourning dove, whitetail deer, or general feline and canine tips? sorry if that’s too much you can just do one if you want

thank you and no pressure!

(from @it-might-be-a-creature)

Hi and welcome to our community! 𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣

To find reliable information on alter/nonhumanity, I recommend the Youtube channel of therian territory and pink dolphin, I find it very interesting.

You can also search the therian wiki/otherkin wiki/alterhuman wiki, but take this information with a grain of salt, as some information may be wrong, missing, or even completely invented. But generally it's pretty decent.

Therian guide is also a nice source.

For tips, know that I'm a feline therian, so I have more tips for felines, but I'll do my best for the rest :3

⚝Tips for mourning dove :

Put a blanket on your back and hold the ends with your hands to simulate wings (a classic)

Make or buy a shawl with feather patterns, I've already seen some crocheted ones on tumblr, it's gorgeous.

If you can, try to climb a tree (be careful though) or something high up.

Try vocals! You can try making bird calls(There are many tutorials on YouTube)!

Listen to nature sounds (especially bird chirping) by going outside, or indoors by listening to nature soundtracks on Spotify, for example.

Go outside to a windy place, close your eyes and imagine yourself flying.

Wears clothes with wide sleeves, which can resemble wings.

⚝Tips for whitetail deer:

Try deer vocals!

Focus on your sense of smell, and smell all the little odors that are barely visible in your environment (to be done in nature, if possible)

Learn the body language of white-tailed deer!

Gently tap your fingers on a hard surface to imitate a hoof sound

White-tailed deer are most active at dawn and dusk, you may be able to walk during these hours, if you can (be careful, be accompanied if possible). They usually rest during the day, so you could take advantage of this time to have a little nap!

⚝Tips for felines:

Practice purring, growling, meowing, (yes, even big cats can purr, although it's a little different than for cats)

Hunt for stuffed animals before eating and imagine eating what you hunted.

Create your own paper claws, it's easy to do and you'll find various tutorials everywhere.

Do your makeup to look like a feline (you don't have to cover your whole face, a little eye shadow under your nose, a line in the small hollow that connects your nose to your mouth and black on the the lower lip can be really euphoric)

Take care of your hair! Don't forget it's your fur.

Climb high (without putting yourself in danger and without doing things your body can't handle), because cats generally feel safer up high.

"claim" your territory! It can be in your garden/house or in a public place (just don't forget that in the latter case this land does not officially belong to you), It is very effective in satisfying one's territorial instincts.

⚝Tips for canines:

Makes canine vocals.

Canines often live in packs or groups, so try to spend more time with loved ones.

Try quadrobics if you can, but be sure to hydrate well and especially not to overdo it if you have arm, leg, heart, ect problems. It's normal that it hurts your fingers and joints a little and that it's difficult to find your balance, but it will pass with time. But if you really suffer a lot every time you try, don't insist, it's okay.

Wrap yourself in a blanket and imagine sleeping with your pack.

Take a nap outside if it's hot, it always feels good.

You can watch the movie "Wolves Walker", I haven't watched it myself yet but apparently it's very popular with canine therians (and many alterhumans in general).

I hope this helped you :3 I posted a list of things to do when you're a newly awakened alter/nonhuman, if you're interested, This might be useful to you. (no forcing)

https://www.tumblr.com/unetherian/760241665074233344/things-to-do-when-youre-a-newly-awakened?source=share

Have a great day/night! Bye!

[ravenwolfie97]

okay so initial thoughts on honkai star rail after i played like half of the tutorial bit this morning before work

first off, for the record, i have not played or heard much of anything about honkai impact 3rd and i have only played genshin impact pretty much since launch so my expectations were "genshin but sci-fi fantasy" but i can say that's not quite what i got (here’s a read more if you don’t care lol)

- immediately i notice that the graphics fidelity is gorgeous, very sleek and clean - it startled me a bit but also made me happy that the lip flaps are synced to the english dub! it seemed to flow really well even with the expression changes. the dialogue system doesn't seem all too different from genshin or. any other system like that. but it's got a pretty nice polish on the transitions between different states - the animation in the cutscenes and battles are really good, clearly they had a real talented team working on them. the characters feel so bouncy and expressive and it is pretty darn satisfying - the UI and interactive language is pretty much exactly the same as genshin with a sci-fi coat of paint. that's not a bad thing necessarily but like. it's pretty obvious - so the way combat and elemental powers work is very different from genshin, which frankly i should have expected, given this is a turn-based rpg. and i shouldn't have too much trouble with it, since turn-based rpgs are kind of a staple in my game roster, but for some reason i had trouble connecting with it. obviously finishing the tutorial would help, but it didn't feel as intuitive as i expected elements are presented in more of a traditional jrpg type of way where there are clear weaknesses you can exploit on enemies if you attack with a certain element. idk if i fully mean this but i think it kind of ruins part of the fun of discovering an enemy's weakness when the game itself just. tells you what it is off the bat also the types are weird in that they have pretty static effects in terms of what they do, the variability in moves is probably also explained further in character profiles but i haven't found how to look at that yet bkjljl - i'm fascinated by the ideas of Quantum and Imaginary types. what does that even mean. how do those manifest - i think it was a bit of a bold move to start the game off with two random characters talking about the world as if things are normal and known, and then having them influence your player character into. being in the plot not that i didn't like kafka and silver wolf. in fact i love both of them a lot. but i also had no context and had no goddamn idea what was going on so i was thrown pretty off-guard first thing which isn't exactly the greatest first impression lol - why is she named March 7th. does anyone know. is there a joke lost in translation or is it because she's like a pseudo-mascot character or. what - speaking of march actually i really want to like her but so far her character reeks of "hi i'm a girl". her skill is called "The Power of Cuteness" and one of her abilities is called "Girl Power" and so far her personality is cute, kind, and kinda stupid. it's a bit much. but she's neat - i have no big opinions on dan heng except he's neat and people keep saying he's the kazuha of star rail bc windy maple leaf boys but they're wrong bc dan heng has a stabby not a slicey and he can only hit one person at a time while kazoo thrives on the multi-hit AoE damage - i do love that the MC's weapon is just. a future baseball bat. that they get to smack people really hard with. no element, just big smack - oh yeah hyv loves to queerbait i guess cuz that wasn't CPR honey the twitter crowd wasn't kidding - i can’t think of anything else rn cuz it’s past midnight but star rail is neat and i like the little train rabbit dog mascot it’s cute and i wanna get past the tutorial hkjbjk

[starbright-sunset]

windy speak to us of the crochet-ing special interest

One thing about crochet is that if you master the basic stitches [single, double, half double and triple] then you're basically all good. But EVERY project will most likely contain some combination of those four! [Although you rarely see the triple crochet stitch] It's also incredibly wise to learn how to chain, make a slipknot and how to make a magic circle/ring/whatever else it could possibly be called. Magic circles are MAINLY used when making amigurumi [Which is basically the art of making little creatures using crochet]. Chaining/Making slipknots are for other projects. [I'm unsure what the primary one is for making clothing since I've only ever made like- Hats/scarves] Also for any beginner crocheters: Please for the love of god use STITCH MARKERS!!!!! Stitch markers will be your bestest of friends!!!!!

THESE LITTLE GUYS!!!! THESE ONES!!!!! It's v frustrating when you lose your place and have to basically redo your ENTIRE project bc you don't exactly remember where you messed up. You should ALSO make sure you're using the right hook size[s] for your yarn as well. There's multiple ways you can figure out which hook size is right for what yarn size!

Also another thing is that nothing's final in crochet. You can take it apart over and over again until you get your desired result!!!!! So don't feel like you NEED to finish a project if you're dissatisfied with it. Work it up Undo it Try again It's all about patience and practice!!!! And you can make a whole shit ton of things with crochet too. - Clothing - Toys - Accessories - Blankets - Pillow cases Hell I've made fucking- Doilies and shit with crochet. There's USUALLY a pattern for everything [Although most of them are unfortunately behind paywalls </3]. You can look up either written patterns or video tutorials! I picked up crochet after my grandma died from cancer bc she enjoyed it a lot when she was alive. My whole motivation to even do crochet is to become skilled enough to make something in her honor. So it's become something like- Super fond of and really proud of for picking up and slowly getting the hang of!!!! And I'm more than happy to talk about it if anyone's ever interested! I have a whole host of tutorials + written patterns that I've saved for future reference and I wanna become a proper fiber artist someday too!!! Have my own little shop on Etsy n stuff.

[shroudscholar]

Shared + Lesson Voice Lines !!

featuring my yuusona, Lost!

dividers by . . . strangergraphics !!

Shared !!

Loading Screen: Twisted Wonderland.

Daily Login: Ah… you got me something…? That’s nice… Thank you.

Another’s Birthday: Happy birthday! Ah… did I scare you? Sorry… Hm? You’ve… never heard me raise my voice before…? Huh… I can’t remember if I have or not… But… this is a special occasion, so… I should show some enthusiasm… right?

His Birthday: Huh? My birthday? Oh… I forgot that it was today… Thank you for the well wishes. There’ll probably be a party, so… do you wanna come?

Tutorial: I’m lost… Can you help me?

Level up 1: Huh…? What’re we doing?

Level up 2: Ah… did I get stronger? That’s cool…

Level up 3: I’ll, uh… Let me write this down… Don’t let me forget, okay?

Level up Max: Mm… Oh, sorry, I was just thinking… I’m really happy I was able to meet you… 

Vignette level up: Hanging out like this… It’s nice… Hey, hold still… I wanna take a picture of you.

Skill level up: Hm? How do I… get by without magic? Mainly… with my fists. Just kidding… I only use my fists sometimes…

Uncapped: Hey… you think now… people will stop picking fights with me? … Yeah, me neither…

Groovification: Ah! … Huh? Oh, sorry… I just… remembered something, I think… A time when I achieved something… I can’t remember what, but… I was really happy… I remember that, at least…

Lesson select 1: Wait… what class are we taking…?

Lesson select 2: I’m… pretty good at taking notes… When I remember to…

Lesson select 3: If you need any help… you should probably ask… someone else…

Lesson start: Grim… don’t cause any trouble… okay?

Lesson finish: Wait… did I remember to take notes…?

Battle start: Oh… you think you’re gonna win? That’s cute…Battle won: Well… at least you tried…

Lessons !!

History Lessons

Good (Morning): Wait… which class is this…? | This isn’t alchemy… is it…? | Once… Grim ate Ace’s homework…

Good (Noon): Is it… lunchtime after this…? | Is it not… called the sleepy death…? | Doesn’t ring a bell…

Good (Afternoon): Ah… I need to replace these markers… | I’m… paying attention… | Mm, I get it… I think…

Great: That’s… a nice story… | Wow… an elephant graveyard… | He turned them… into frogs?

Perfect: History… sure is important… | That’s interesting… | I wonder… what my history’s like…

Special Lessons Perfect: Oh… yay, I guess… | Were you bored or…? | Need me to do something for you… again…?

Physical Education Lessons

Good (Morning): So… just run laps again? Okay… | Remember to… stay hydrated… | That looks fun…

Good (Noon): Be careful, Grim… | Try not to… fall… | Everyone’s floating… like ghosts…

Good (Afternoon): It’s windy out? I can’t tell… | Everyone seems… to have enjoyed themselves… | Ah… is it break time…?

Great: Coach makes sure… I’m not left out… | Running is nice… I think… | Maybe… I should lift some weights…

Perfect: Need me to… carry you to the nurse…? | I’m getting ready… for next Beanfest… | Muscles… are for hugging…

Special Lessons Perfect: Oh… you’re here… | Slacking off… again? | Is someone hurt…?

Alchemy Lessons

Good (Morning): Hang on… what class am I in…? | This isn’t history… is it…? | I hope… nothing explodes again… | Grim… don’t eat that… | Is something… burning?

Good (Noon): Am I on fire… again? | Am I… doing this right? | Is it… lunchtime after this…? | Is it… meant to be this color? | It’s bubbling…

Good (Afternoon): Is it… gold yet? | No, I’m… paying attention… | It’s hard… to take notes… while stirring… | It’s like… making soup… | What’s next…?

Great: Yay… | Cool… | This is… kinda relaxing… | I’m listening… I’m listening… | Everything’s… going smoothly…

Perfect: If I… make gold… can I keep it? | Can I… make stuff besides gold? | I bite it to prove it’s real… right? | I’d prefer… chocolate… | All done…

Special Lessons Perfect: Really…? | Do you… have something to add, or…? | You’re kinda… distracting… | What’re you here for…? | I didn’t… blow anything up this time…

[moralanxietystudio]

Windy Meadow - A Roadwarden Tale has entered the next phase of development - and I hope to release it this September!

Cozy at parts, gruesome and melancholic at others. Now with updated demo - better UI, tutorial, editing, visuals.

I'd really appreciate adding the game to your wishlists!

[abyssaldissonance]

Some Infinity Nikki Critiques so far:

In no particular order

Dark skin could have slightly lighter palms and soles. (Also Shining Nikki).

New tutorials should be at the top of the list to look through, not in the middle. Once they are read AND the player has exited from the screen, they should go in their intended order when reviewed again later.

HUD could have a quicker/easier way to look at Blings, Gems, Diamonds, and other currencies, such as clicking or pressing a button for them to show on screen for a couple seconds before fading away, or letting players toggle on/off permanent currency stats (and maybe choose which ones they want displayed).

Pear-Pal Apps should be rearranged how players want similar to apps on a real phone. Every new app I get makes me mis-click the ones I got used to.

When Exiting Realm with backspace, it should take you to the Realm menu. Realm menu should also exit with backspace. That way I can press backspace twice quickly and exit to the world, or I can press backspace once and enter a new Realm quickly to optimize my Vital Energy spending. It' a little annoying to backspace and be in the world only to go back into the Realms.

Combat / Purification by itself feels bland. I liked the fight with Bouldy, especially the Dark Realm, but I think there should be at least one or two more combat outfit/abilities such as:

Pushing ability (wind?) where you can push Esselings away from you in case you are surrounded. The items that we are given to "stun" them don't feel very intuitive to use, I might as well just spam the Purify button. I imagine in my mind a straight line or cone ability right in front of Nikki, and when leveled up it can become a circular whirlwind. Maybe a puffy green dress for a windy theme, or vines and leaves that whip around. Weaker, multi-targeting projectiles: Possibly shoot three projectiles that lock on to Esselings, but take 3 hits to destroy them. I imagine a rose-themed or thorn-like outfit. Possibly switch between combat outfits with middle mouse button.

I'm not a huge fan of forced limitations (daily limitation of Wish Bottles capped at 500, monthly limitation of tranquility traded for resonance crystals, etc).

Photos would be nice if I could pause real-time in addition to Nikki. There are a couple shots of flying on top of the giant pigeon that I would love to get, and I have a difficult time getting some poses with Nikki's eyes half closed beside taking 50 photos and praying. This is mostly frivolous day-dreaming though. The photography sections is really quite nice. You can "upgrade" it to get more poses, lighting, etc.

Slightly Better Early Outfits for Styling Battle would be nice. I additionally dislike that it takes up / replaces my Outfit Slot 1 after a Styling Battle. The early items you get don't match very well unless you exclusively use the ability outfits. Thankfully those are easy enough to level up. It'd just be nice to have more cohesive outfits early on, even if they're simple/plain. To be fair, this has always been a silly issue with Nikki (and other) games. Really hate it replaces my actual Outfit slot though.

Bike. Bad. It goes forward fast, which is nice. But turning kind of sucks and I feel much more inclined to either fast-travel or just hoof it so I can collect materials along the way. I don't think there's a whole lot they could do about it except maybe make turning just slightly easier/faster.

I could just be missing it but: Lore Database. There is a "folklore guide" but its a collection of minigames. I've read a bunch of the notes/books they have throughout the game, and I can't seem to find anywhere this information is stored. It'd just be nice to have. Aditionally, we could have a database of certain characters and terminologies. I know tons of games do this but I think of Star Ocean and Brave Fencer Musashi which had a sort of compendium of characters, artifacts, locations, and other lore.

Some Menus dont Exit w ESC key. I don't know if it's an oversight or not, but I would really like Every menu/screen etc to be able to close with ESC key. Evolution, Courses, Store, Wishes, Factions so far I have to manually click the arrow.

Positives For Me:

The Fish are categorized by weight rather than how many individual fish, so you're not catching "1" fish, you're catching "1.7 grams" of fish. It's a really small thing but I like that it's grams of fish instead of individual fish.

The Gacha / Resonance doesnt feel as predatory as most. I've definitely spent money on other games etc, but I really don't like feeling like I should have to throw MORE money at a game series I already have high VIP in (Love & Shining Nikki). I Get that this is their version of making money with nigh-indefinite content updates (I hope/assume by being a longer-term nikki fan and seeing how they do things), so I hope acquiring outfits will be easier in-game this way as well as I hope the amount of time between events won't be as daunting as Shining Global.

Layering Clothes feels nice. We can do this in the Nikki games already, but if you wear boots with trousers (or other clothing combinations), sometimes they clip through. So far, if you wear certain layers of clothes, they get tucked or folded in a way that makes it look good. There's still some clipping issues but they're usually a super weird and ugly combination of clothes to begin with that, aesthetically wouldn't be very likely to get paired up.

Mild Critique: Sometimes the top of the boots or some sleeves get "cut off" in order to make the look work. I think it could be done a little better, but I appreciate that they're trying very hard not to make things clip.

Material Components are really neat! They're unique in super cute and fun ways. I love the idea of having different outfits for different tasks. I love that the flora and fauna designs are based off clothing materials, such as stocking-like stripes on goats or buttons inside pinecones.

Mild Critique: I wish the material components were matched a tiny bit better to the clothing that require them. It was weird making a white dress out of red fruit, or using "knit-moths" to make leather "dad" shoes. I think a tiny bit more thought could make this make a little more sense. There ARE some good clothing vs material choices, though.

Time Skip is so helpful. I'm SO glad they implemented it. Certain animals or events happen at certain times of day and you can either time skip in the Pear-Pal menu, or if you arrive at a certain event, you can time skip on the spot. It makes things so much smoother.

Photo Mode is so good and fun. I enjoy taking photos, I like seeing other people's photos, it has lots of nice features.

The Environment is easy to navigate in a fun way. When I see a super tall building or a super low canyon, I can find viable ways to get to where I want to. Steps/natural staircases are placed strategically to help encourage exploration without hindrance besides extremely obvious edge-of-the-map boundaries.

Despite my critiques, I genuinely love the game itself so far.

I'm still hoping beautiful outfits won't be limited to Resonance, and likewise hope Resonance isn't too difficult to acquire because that's a huge turn off for me.

I'm already stretched between Nikki games and I already spend much less than I used to. Yeah, yeah, you don't have to spend money in any of the games, but it does suck that it feels like you have to wait a whole year or even two just to acquire a complete set, and that's if you budget solely around a handful of sets, let alone if you actually want to proceed with having high enough ranks to acquire more diamonds to afford more sets. So I hope Infinity Nikki won't be quite the same.

[egbertsoyfacing]

egbertsoyfacing masterpost! read through the entire askblog!

act 1: "setup." ==> start askblog. ==> thoughts on dave? ==> do you like doritos? ==> how much would you die if you eat a peanut? ==> anon baked some cookies. ==> do you read yaoi? ==> thoughts on jade?

act 2: "more effort." ==> what are your hobbies? ==> are you a homosexual? ==> any thoughts on estrogen? ==> show us the outfits you tried for kanaya. ==> rank the trolls. ==> eat pant ==> what games do you play with friends? ==> who let the dogs out? ==> :3 ==> hows it going with vriska? ==> have you met the hacker troll? ==> a present from nepeta claus. ==> do you believe in ghosts? ==> slime tutorial. ==> how are dave and karkat? ==> do you like cheese? ==> dinner. ==> bee allergy. ==> showing off windy powers. ==> have you considered- ==> charcuterie boards.

act 3: "so youre an egg. what now?" ==> denial is a river in egypt. ==> favorite food and have you tried troll food? ==> you look nice in a skirt. ==> best buy. ==> slime tutorial….. please ==> pipe bomb! ==> soyfacing slice of bread. ==> favorite video game? ==> gender is a lie! ==> google charcuterie board. ==> basketball. ==> peanut eminems. ==> do you use your windy powers for evil? ==> gender is a social construct. ==> hows jade? ==> cheese cheese cheddar cheese cheddar cheese. ==> gushers. ==> new year resolutions? ==> you didnt explode. its all in your head. ==> its just a normal shirt. ==> scammer poses as dad egbert. ==> do you ever dress up with friends? ==> caliborn. ==> trying on make up!

intermission 1: "transition speedrun" ==> you can be whatever you want! ==> look! a mirror! ==> are you going to grow your hair out? ==> will you be getting a new name?

act 4: "wow the blog kept on going." ==> the baby is you. its a girl. ==> you look absolutely stunning in a dress! ==> have you come out to your friends? ==> we all came up with the same name? ==> starting hrt. ==> hooray! the egg cracked! ==> helping nepeta with her make up. ==> new pfp? ==> complimenting june. ==> do you know yuri? ==> jasprose? ==> rose looks so cool! ==> cargo skirt. ==> i keep telling you, its just a normal shirt. ==> you let your memories of vriska name you didnt you? ==> scammer poses as dad egbert part 2. ==> several hundred caliborns. ==> are you actually gonna have a party? ==> a pokeball containing ogerpon. ==> imagine a plate of spaghetti. ==> opinion on fallout new vegas? ==> so whats up with jaspers? ==> favorite songs? ==> pizza party.