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heligooddeals · 5 years ago

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There's a kind of love...

Over yonder in the land of Discord, via the Sanctuary Social, Blackguard and Sideswipe ( @wily-red-and-galeforce-gold ) do something... special. ♥

Transcript undercut.

NOTE: I’m leaving mun and muse user handles to help distinguish who wrote what (although I think it’s easy to tell @wily-red-and-galeforce-gold‘s mastery apart from my mess). I am user Muddy, and Blackguard is user flyingbusiness. Wily is user Wily, and Sideswipe is user Recklessinred.

Muddy

flyingbusiness: I need to see you flyingbusiness: ASAP

Wily

Recklessinred: of course! As soon as I get released. What's up?

Muddy

flyingbusiness: I need to talk to you in person.

Wily

Recklessinred: is everyone ok? Recklessinred: give me like half a day. I'mma talk my way out of the medbay. I'm like 90 Percent better Recklessinred: that's a passing grade

Muddy

flyingbusiness: We're okay. It's not an emergency. flyingbusiness: I just... realized I need to do something and it's important you're around for it.

Wily

Recklessinred: oh! Surprises! I like those =D

Muddy

flyingbusiness: Good flyingbusiness: I hope this one lives up to the hype

Wily

Recklessinred: I'm free \o/

Muddy

flyingbusiness: Good! flyingbusiness: Now get your aft over here

Wily

Recklessinred: yes ma'am. OMW

Muddy

[coordinates, because their position of space has changed slightly]

Wily

Recklessinred: o7 Recklessinred: gimme like 30 minutes and I'll be there

Muddy

Thirty minutes; The perfect amount of time to make something feel short yet agonizingly long at the same time.

Blackguard tries to keep herself busy and distracted from the wait time by tidying up the various livable rooms of Crossfire, starting with the mess hall because it had initially seemed like the best place to sit down with Sideswipe. When it dawns on her just how trashy the room is for what she intends to do though she hurries to the office-living room, cleaning there until she realizes it's just too big and not nearly private enough. Then she glances over at her berthroom, wondering if would be appropriate to invite him there since it was the most private she had available but also HER room.

Lug stretches out on the floor behind her with a great big groan and sigh, drawing her attention over to him, and her optics naturally pass over the viewing windows as she looks. As she gazes out into the stars, wondering just how and where she's going to bare her soul to Sideswipe, an idea hits her and she eagerly looks to the ceiling. "Crossfire?"

"Yes, Blackguard?"

"Can you still do the magnetic thing? You know - when you keep someone grounded to the floor or to your form if we're outside?"

"Yes." A thoughtful hum passes through the whole ship before he asks, "Are you intending to go outside, Blackguard?"

"I am. If Sideswipe's clear to go anyway. So we'll see, okay? And don't say anything to him."

"Your secret is safe with me, Blackguard."

Wily

It doesn't take him too long to make his way over. In fact, for once he's actually early, and hadn't been sidetracked or turned around. But there were a couple of reasons for that.

For starters he genuinely just enjoyed hanging out with Blackguard. So heck yeah he was gonna come over when invited!

Secondly, he was curious.

Curious about what she wanted to see him about. He had an incessant to know, and curiosity was a constant driving force that ate away at him. You can't just ask him to come over, then cryptically proceed to tell him nothing. That could have meant a plethora of things. Was something going on? Was this all code to proceed with the loose haphazard plan to bust Blackguard out of her house arrest sentence? Was something wrong? Was it something innocuous like "hey I was bored, wanna watch a movie and eat this cool new snack I ordered?" Maybe it was a fun surprise.

Honestly though? Regardless of the reason, her asking was enough to summon him.

So here he is.

Arrive he does, popping in to the ship, only mildly nauseous from the bridge trip. He announces himself with a weak but cheery, "Knock knock!

Muddy

A low rumble rolls through the ship when Sideswipe materializes within the supreme and Blackguard trills at the noise; Curious as to what had Crossfire making such a noise, then excited when she realized what/who it was.

"Coming!" She makes haste for the stairs to meet him on the lower deck, eager to get things going but now also mildly concerned for his health. He didn't sound so hot a moment ago and considering the state he had been in not that long ago...

"Hey." She walks up to him with as much casualness as she can muster, kneeling down to give him a loose hug and take a quick inspection of his shoulder. "How are you? Are you okay? You sounded kind of off earlier."

Wily

Don't worry, Blackguard. It's kind of difficult to tell if people are acting a little antsy when your world just tilted sideways. But he'll be fine. He needs a moment.

"I'm fiiiiine," He says a little airily and leans heavily into the hug. Maybe she meant to keep it loose and casual, but he's going to cling a little. Because it helps keep the world from spinning. "All fixed up!" And a little motion sick but maybe if he pretended he wasn't it would go away quicker.

But even after the vertigo ebbs he doesn't let go right away. Instead he tips his helm up, and offers a cheeky grin. "Hi."

"Sooooo," He stage whispers, "Gonna tell me the secret before I actually combust? I wanna knoooow."

Muddy

"Sure, sure." If Sideswipe wants a HUG then, by god, he's getting a HUG. It's not like they're hard to give (especially with their drastic size difference) and Blackguard is always happy to give and receive those kinds of hugs. She'll be mindful of his shoulder though and keep the squeezing around it to a minimal. Everything else on the other hand? It's all getting squeezed to death and then some until he starts wiggling around. Then she'll ease up, look back at him, and hum affectionately.

"Hi." She shifts, easing back on the embrace and carefully resting her hands over his shoulders, then gets down on both knees and sits back on her legs. "So... You're... One of the best mechs I've ever known, and probably one of the best friends I've ever had." A humorless laugh escapes her and she looks at the floor a moment before forcing herself to look back at him. "And that's not really saying much because I've had some really worthless ones too. But, you're good. You're more than good. You're... You're perfect honestly. You're kind, and wonderful, and--" Air hitches in her vents and she lets out another laugh, this one genuine. It's hard to speak with all these emotions bubbling up and getting caught in her throat, so she blurts out: "Will you be my amica endura?"

Wily

They're almost optic to optic like this. Him swaying as he stands, while she kneels and puts them at a more equal standing. Their size difference is comical but the companionship is comfortable. Especially now that the last waves of vertigo have burned away. Instead that tilting sick feeling fades, and it’s replaced by curiosity, and a breezy sort of excited energy. He’s not sure what for yet, but there’s anticipation. He’s smiling boyishly, excited by the things he might be told whatever that might be. Secrets? Something new? Was it time for plan 'jail break.’? Maybe it was nothing important at all and even that was fine. Whatever it was he was ready. He was- …

He wasn't ready for that.

First it was the nice words. Sweet words that even now were always like little surprises. He craved them the little positive reinforcements.

The positive things, and assurances... that he was good. That someone important saw him that way, despite seeing some of the worst of him. That gave his spark a squeeze.

He didn't let his thoughts linger on that too much. Instead he basked in the nice things, albeit a little confused, his grin making his cheeks hurt.

But as much as it warmed him to hear, it was... he wasn't sure what to say? So he ducked his helm, and laughed a little sheepishly. "Pffffft, you've got a weird definition of perfect. Ha...."

A pause. "You really consider me one of your best friends? Wow, I don't know what I did but go me! I mean you're pretty great your-"

And then he hears what she asks.

And then he thinks for a moment to remember what that is.

And his face does something complicated. Bemusement. Realization. A smile, because he figures it out! The smile gives way to shock as it hits him what it all means put together.

And then articulately-

-he proceeds to say nothing.

And in stunned silence he stares.

Muddy

She figured he would be like this - to a point. After he cried and submitted to her temporary grounding because of the last confession she gave to him, it was easy to anticipate a similar reaction to this confession. She didn't think he'd fall victim to a blue screen of death however and became mildly concerned when he suddenly cut himself off, giving no indication that the thought would continue or be derailed by another any time soon. Part of her even began to worry that this was a calm before a storm and rejection was looming on the horizon, but she did her best to ignore the insecure thought. She and Sides were good.

Probably.

Hopefully.

"Sides?" Tilting her helm, she rubs her hand over his good shoulder and brightens her visor. "You still with me?"

Wily

He blinks almost owlishly, the hand smoothing over his shoulder nudging some life back into him.

"Uhuh," He answers softly, with a distracted nod. Still, even hazy as he sounds, his optics are still wide and locked on her.

It's a weird sensation. A swelling in his chest, and a knot in his throat, and like all of his systems collectively seized into uselessness on him. It's warm, and cold, and he likes it, but he doesn't understand it and it's a lot. It's a lot, even if it's not showing that it's a lot. Not yet. The bewilderment is keeping everything at bay.

Eventually his brows knit, and a thousand things are flitting through his head, but the only thing he can snag from the chaos is-

"Why?"

The 'me' is unspoken, but hangs there.

Muddy

"Why.. what?" She mimics his question with her one, tilting her helm a few degrees more before straightening it out. "Like, why do I want to do this? Or..?"

Wily

"I...yeah? But... Why me?" He's still looking at her with that confusion in his optics. There's a fight in his head. Some creeping warm thing at war with incomprehension. It's an odd strain and maybe that's why his voice cracks in a way that's equally confusing. "Why would... why would you want this with me? I don't-"

Muddy

Relief washes over while a dagger simultaneously twists itself in her spark chamber. This wonderful, thoughtful, kind, loving, caring, fun, hilarious, and energetic mech was asking because he didn't understand why he'd qualify for such an honorable position? Clearly she needs to be a better friend - amica - to him then, so he'd understand exactly why he and he alone was the best mech she's known.

"Sideswipe." She cooes, dimming her visor to a gentle 'smile' as she cups the sides of his face, ready to whick any tears he might shed. "Why wouldn't I want to do this? Out of everyone I've ever called my amica, you're the only mech I've really felt... Good about saying it too. The only one I'd be saddened if I lost forever because it'd mean I failed SPECTACULARLY at being a worthy friend. And I would like to keep you around forever, if at all possible." She laughs, visor glowing a shade brighter. "There's literally no one else I'd want to bear my spark to either. Out of everyone, you deserve that part of me. I owe you that much, I think."

Wily

He stares at her in awe.

She thought all of that about him? But...he was chaotic. Impulsive. Naiive about some things, and too practiced in others. Practiced in not great, destructive things. To hear what she had to say so succinctly like that? It was-

It wasn't surprising though.

She had such things to him before. In snippets. In a longer sparkfelt moment. Still, to hear it now with such earnestness and warmth... it hit him square in those vulnerable things, soothing over them with the reminder that people thought he was good. Even though he was flawed.

She knew he was flawed. And still cared for him. For the all of him.

Like he cared for her. The all of her. The wry humor, the patience, the worry she showed in her own way, the exasperation, the silliness, the vulnerability and highs and lows, the give and the take-

People he cared about, cared about him too. And he knew that. Of course he did, but sometimes a reminder had a way of sneaking up on you before blindsiding you with something raw.

Affection. Wonder. Why wonder though? He knew these things didn't he? But sometimes things being spelled out-

She thought all of that of him? She deemed him that important to her?

That was kind of amazing. But it was a surprise, and not a surprise in equal measure.

Because they were friends right? Slowly, gradually, over time they got to this point. Somewhere odd, but strangely comfortable and obvious right?

"Oh," He manages to get out a watery laugh. His vision is misting but he's all grins again. A bright smile has broken across his face as the confusion is blown away by something giddy.

He slips past the hands on his cheeks, and gives her a hug again. Because why not? How could he not? Not with this odd happy buzz coursing through his lines. The tears would just have to get free reign for a bit. "Neat. Cool. So what do I have to do? Does this mean I get to be one of your 'super best friends?'"

Muddy

Arguably, she was rushing into things - like she had done before and always seemed to do, especially with amica endurae. Jitter had earned the title from her because they were both mechs stumbling into the multiverse and wanted to have an amica to count on if they ever got lost or overwhelmed. Blackout was rewarded with the title after he had taken initiative to search for her while she was lost in the grey and took care of Rigel and Starflare in her absence. Megatron became her amica because he was always willing to act as a pillar of strength for her when disaster struck.

But then Jitter found love and ran away while Blackout became jealous and hateful, and when Megatron got busy with rebuilding Cybertron Blackguard started to wonder if it was them or her. In some cases fault could be found with them, but in all of the cases she was at fault. She rushed into everything, she declared love for them because they had helped her, and made that dependency the foundation of their relationship. It was why she started pushing Sideswipe (and others) away when Redstrike left to go to war; She didn't want to be dependent on them, to fall back into the cycle of rushing into things, and making a moment into a bigger deal than it actually was.

But Sideswipe pushed back. He insisted he was capable of helping her, of comforting her, and doing whatever she needed if she'd only ask for it first - or nothing at all if she truly wanted that. Whatever she needed, he'd provide because they were friends and that's what friends did for each other.

And she cracked.

Maybe this was another disaster in the making. Maybe she was rushing into something again. Maybe they were doomed but she didn't care. She loved him now and he loved her in return, and that was all that mattered at the moment.

"Oh." She mimics him, teasing because it was such a simple word that somehow said so much. Oh, that's why. Oh, wow, you really do care. Oh, this is really happening.

Her arms quickly wrap themselves around him again, falling back into the usual position of an all-consuming, lovingly crushing hug that she had grown use to giving him. A little extra squeeze was given as she chuckles, tickled by his adorable questions and feeling a wave of warmth spread through her frame. "Yeah, you're going to be one my super best friends. And all you have to do is stand back from me a bit, okay?"

Wily

He shakes his helm at the request, but makes no move to let go. Not at first. He allows himself to remain anchored to her for at least a good couple of minutes before he finally relents, tries to wipe his face on his shoulder (the tears just smear), and shuffles back.

Amica Endura. This isn't a title that existed where he was from, and he only learned about it recently. And maybe that unfamiliarity didn't give the words the same weight that they held elsewhere. The same kneejerk meaning.

They didn't need to.

No, the fact that they meant something meaningful to Blackguard, was enough to make it meaningful to him. It meant something to her, and was something precious from where she was from and she was willing to share that with him. That spoke volumes.

Even if titles weren't as clear to him friendship was.

Friendship was a simple yet complicated thing after all. An intricate collection of thousands of little moments and feelings, good and bad that summed together made a bond. A meaningful bond. Through thick or thin right? Like a collection of little threads that could strengthen or fray. It wasn't always easy to maintain them, but they could be added too and the resulting bonds were more than worth it. The care and love and shared experiences good and bad were worth it.

So he didn't know what to expect. He didn't know the customs, and barely remembered the title 'Amica Endura' meant a moment ago. But nevertheless, as a giddy anticipation burned through him. As the knot in his throat grew, he stood expectently and waited. Albeit a little antsy. "Like this?"

Muddy

A couple of seconds versus a couple of minutes versus a couple of hours; There's not much difference between the three beats of time in comparison to the long lasting lifespan of a Transformer. So when you've got two mechs who thrive off of physical affection, extended hugs are bound to happen without anybody noticing or complaining about them - especially in rare moments like these where trouble was put off to the side and happiness was brought to focus. Happiness, and love.

"Just like that." Blackguard assures, 'smilingly' brightly, and resettles into her knelt position before closing her optics. Drawing in a long cycle of air, she holds the breath in her system for a moment before slowly releasing it, the multiple layers of protective metal and plating on her chassis folding back as she exhaled until there was nothing - absolutely nothing - between her spark and Sideswipe.

She opens her optics then casts away her visor, looking directly at him as the light of her spark illuminates his face.

"I bid you stand in the glow of my spark that you may feel the heat of my words and know them to be true. I invite you to receive my light and in doing so becoming Amica Endura—from now until forever. For your kindness and your love of life, both your's and everyone around you. For your boundless energy and your endless humor. For your optimism and your hope." Her digits twitch and in an act of impulse, Blackguard takes Sideswipe's hands in both of hers, then squeezes them. "As you are to me, may I be to you—today, tomorrow, and always."

Wily

He's stunned.

It takes a moment for his helm to catch up with what he's seeing. He hears the mechanisms in her plating unlatch and fold back. Then there's a light washing them both out, bleaching their colors pale.

Oh.

It's the light of the all of her. And he doesn't know what to do.

Plenty of people had seen Sideswipe's spark before. Mostly during medical checks or as they peiced him back together. So for the longest time Sideswipe knew that exposing it was something that should be avoided simply from a survival perspective.

In the last few years he had learned that there could be more to it than that. He had learned the other implications. What it meant to others to show this part of you. In a variety of ways. He learned through listening, talking, and growing with a love.

Your spark was everything you were. Your core. Your soul. If some were to believed an imprint of your memories. Showing it meant you were at your most vulnerable. To expose it to someone willingly...that meant trust, right? An immense trust.

He didn't know what to expect for this, what she would do, but he hadn't expected this. So, snaps back to the present, pieces together the implications, and it makes him feel lightheaded. Bowled him right over again.

So he stands there brows knitted, optics wide as the air catches in his vent. He tries to say something, but can't. But that's fine because Blackguard is talking instead... Making a pledge of friendship that thunders in his helm, and makes his bottom lip wobble.

So he sucks in a breath, and forgets the curtain of cleanser welled in his optics because it doesn't really matter if he can see. It's really bright anyways.

"I," there for sure are tears but he's never been one to be ashamed to feel things. Why should he? Especially when those things are happy. "I... I don't know what to- You mean all that? I- what am-? Am I supposed to do something back? Like trust falls? I-"

So for a moment he fidgets and panics, and flusters about feeling suddenly on the spot because he's not sure what he should be doing with himself. But if it's a show of trust-

He finally exhales, and his own plating fold back exposing his own light. Spinning like a young star behind the crystal casing, before that shifts back too.

He suddenly looks a little unsure and teary, but still awed under it all. "Um. I'm not whole like you are, and I just have the pieces but..um... samesies?"

A pause.

"....Wow. That was lame of me. Did I just ruin the thing?"

Muddy

In hindsight, Blackguard realizes a little too late that she should have gone over the intricacies of the ritual with him and spare him the feeling of being lost and overwhelmed in a foreign ceremony. It would have been the polite and intelligent thing to do anyway, but her eagerness to move forward with him pushed aside any and all forethought she could have had at the moment and hurdled them both into the ritual without any hesitation.

That kind of made things a little more special though too, in its own unique way. No two proposals she had previously gone through were the same, but this one was now a special little case of its own because she chose to bare her spark to him and cite the amicable chant, which she hadn't done for the others, and he returned the gesture. It was an unnecessary but wholesome move that forever made the moment special in her spark.

"No." She laughs and pulls one of her hands back to wipe at her optics a moment, whisking away the joyful tears that refused to stop leaking out despite her best efforts to keep them locked down. "No, you did great. What you said was perfect, Sides. Thank you."

And with nothing left to say, with all their love and their truths and their souls laid out, Blackguard pulls Sideswipe in for one last hug - carefully, to keep her spark from lining up with his and doing things it needn't do between them. It still reacts to the presence of another though, glowing brighter as if to reach out with its light, and burning hot in her core. She ignores the urges it feeds her and squeezes with all the strength she dare to use on the little lambo, turning to 'kiss' the top of his helm. "Thank you, Sideswipe. For everything."

Wily

The hug is more than a relief. It's an assurance that he didn't mess up. But more than that it gave him something to do with all that building excited energy. So he clings to her again, teary and laughing even though he doesn't completely understand why. But this feels important.

His crystal casing folds back over his spark, shattering the light through it's surface. And eventually chest plates follow, but even with the light of the room dimmer he's still so very bright.

He feels the press to his helm and laughs, watery as it sounds. "Thanks? I should thank you too." For not writing him off as a dumb kid. For listening. For being there.

He cuddles closer before tipping his helm up, "Sorry for improvising. So is it official? Super special friend status?"

Muddy

"We're official." Another 'kiss' is pressed to the side of his helm and Blackguard gives him one last loving squeeze before pulling away - if only to get enough space to cover up her sparkchamber without pinching him in the process. "Super special best amica friends for life. Or until you get sick of me." She hums, pulling him back in and rocking him around for a bit. "Cause unfortunately for you, I like you too much to get tired of you. So you're stuck with me forever."

Wily

He's laughing, and teary. Once her chest closes back up, as if magnitized, he falls right back against her so those hugs can resume. He doesn't want to let go. Not yet, when he feels flooded by that affection he so desperately craves. "Usually *sniff* I'm the one saying that. So I guess that means you're stuck with me until you get sick of me too."

And you know? He was fine with that. For the long haul, if it meant more moments that felt like this

#wilyredandgaleforcegold #wilyredandgaleforcegold; Sideswipe #There's A Kind Of Love RP

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