#will try not to delete these and just bury them w more posts instead

[naivety]

this is why i'm a deadcoded samgirl

[heyitsani]

Pretend You Know This Song

Word Count: 2265

Rating: Teen and Up

Warnings: General Batfam chaos, Reverse Robins (not really a warning but eh)

Pairing: Damian Wayne/Jon Kent and brief hints of one-sided-ish Jason Todd/Dick Grayson

Notes: As I told @mlim8, this comic has been living in my brain rent-free since she posted it and I couldn’t resist.  Go shower it with the most affection you possibly can because it’s adorable and I love it.  And Mel.

This is also kind of just a shit post because I needed to get it out of my head.  So I wrote and edited in less than two hours.  Don’t judge.

You can also read this on AO3 here

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Damian and his father were already seated at the table in the small dining room the family used for regular meals when the others started filtering in.  It had been a particularly rough night on patrol, both Jason and Richard getting a little more roughed up than usual, so it was unsurprising that everyone was slow to wake.  Though, had it been a working day, he was certain his father would have managed to pull himself out of bed long before he actually did.

“Tim, I was unaware you stayed the night,” his father greeted his second eldest son as he entered the room.  Damian was unsurprised by the raised eyebrow and silence from his younger brother was he took the seat just to the left of the eldest of the Wayne kids.  It was as far away as he could get from the man he still struggled to be around.  Not that Damian blamed him.

There was a soft scuffing sound of socked feet being dragged on a Persian rug as Jason entered the room and slumped in the seat next to Tim.  Damian knew that if either of them had been more aware, they would be on opposite sides of the table as well.

“Good Morning, Master Jason,” Alfred greeted as he set a plate in front of the teenager before he set one down in front of Tim as well.  

“Morning, Alfie,” Jason intoned before diving headfirst into the plate of food without greeting any of the others around him.  It was all very mundane and ordinary for each of them.  After years of being a family, however mismatched they were, they had become terribly predictable.

More unsurprising than all of the other entrances to the dining room was Richard’s.  Despite having only been with them for a little over a year and still suffering the loss of his parents, Damian couldn’t help but compare the boy to a literal ray of sunshine.  He had no idea how the thirteen-year-old managed it, but he always managed to seem so cheerful.  Despite the various bandages and bruises that could be seen over what bits of skin were exposed, he still bounded into the room with a bright smile.  

Damian watched him greet each family member over the top of the newspaper he was reading, grudgingly accepting the hug he gave the eldest so freely, before the teen bounced over to his seat by Bruce.  

“Morning everyone,” the boy greeted with a warm smile before turning that smile upward to Alfred as the man set a plate in front of him.  “Thanks, Alfred.”  The older man smiled and patted his head before heading back to the kitchen.  “I have an announcement,” Richard’s voice sounded from his chair, and Damian glanced up to see him smiling that smile with his hands clasped in front of him.

He could see the others at the table look over at Richard and regard him carefully.  Rarely ever did Richard not command the attention of whatever room or crowd he was in.  The acrobatic nature of him wanted the attention.  In a small, family setting it was no different.

“So I’ve decided!  When I grow up, I’m going to marry Jon,” he offered up freely, and Damian felt his eyes roll immediately before dropping them back down to the paper in front of him.  He heard his father let out a chuckle, something only Richard could pull from the head of the household, and he noticed Tim regarding Jason, who was frozen looking at the youngest.  “He’s kind, and smart, and handsome,” he listed but Damian found himself more interested in the growing smirk on Tim’s face as he continued to watch Jason for some reason.

A quick glance at the teen showed he was still frozen watching the youngest.  

“And he can fly!” Richard finished his list off with a bright smile on his face, seemingly proud of the list of reasons he had made in Jon’s favor.  And though Damian couldn’t exactly fault the younger for seeing Jon’s better qualities, he was a little disturbed given the age difference between his best friend and his younger brother.

“WHAT?!”  Jason’s outburst seemed to catch everyone but Tim off guard and Damian made a mental note to ask the other man about that.  “EW!!  NO!!! You can’t marry Jon!  He’s already so old!”  Damian glanced over at Richard as Jason ranted, clenching the paper a little tighter at Jon being deemed “old” when Damian was two years his senior.  He decidedly ignored the smirk Tim sent his way despite seeing it out of the corner of his eye.  Bastard. “If you marry him when you’re older, he’ll be like 1,000!!”  Damian watched Richard’s face turn confused, brows pulling together as Jason spoke.

While Damian didn’t see the harm in Richard’s little crush, he was still young after all, Jason seemed to be completely outraged by the idea.  A glance at the other two adult at the table told him his father was simply exasperated and trying to ignore the situation but Tim looked almost…amused as he typed into his phone.  He really needed to get to the bottom of that.

“Besides, you can’t even date him!”  Damian grabbed his tea as Jason continued and tried to go back to reading the paper.  “He’s gonna marry Dami!”  The words caught him off guard enough to cause him to spit out the tea he had just taken a sip of.  

“Wh-what?!?”

“W-we are not, Todd!” Damian found himself exclaiming, eyes wide as he took in the determined look on Jason’s face and the tears welling in Richard’s eyes.  Damn it all to hell, he grumbled mentally.  The last thing he wanted was a crying Richard.  

“Liar!”  Jason turned an accusing finger on Damian.  “I saw you smile at him during patrol!”  Damian sat there for a moment, stunned, before he noticed a movement out of the corner of his eye and looked over at Tim.  

“Drake!  Are you recoding?!”

That damn smirk slid back onto his face.  “No.”  

The sigh his father heaved from his end of the table was loud enough to draw Damian’s wide eyes.  He could see Richard with his face buried in his hands and buried in his father’s chest.  “You boys are lovely this morning,” the man said flatly, an arm wrapped around Richard’s shoulders.

“Father…!”  Damian gestured over to the other two, one who still hadn’t put down his phone and the other who was no glaring at the food in front of him. But his father simply raised an eyebrow and started to rub circles on Richard’s back.

“That is certainly enough of this conversation,” Alfred stepped into the room and immediately took Tim’s phone out of his hand.  Despite the protests from Tim, Damian knew Alfred would most likely delete the video.  “Can you boys please finish up your meal without another incident?  Master Richard, you have yet to touch your food.”  His tone went from hard to soft as he reached the youngest who was still clinging to his adoptive father.  “Why don’t we put this behind us for the time being and enjoy the rest of our meal?” There was a muffled sniffle before Damian saw Richard’s head nod and him slowly sit up.  But he kept his eyes downcast as he moved back to his chair and refused to look at anyone as he started to slowly eat.

Damian found himself clenching his fist to keep from getting up to comfort the boy.  He knew that after the year of practically being his father, he would always struggle not to be the one the teen turned to when he was upset.  But this time, it was Damian he was upset with.  So he pushed the instinct down and stood from his seat.

“Titus come,” he called for the dog who had been laying at his feet the entire debacle as he stepped away from the table.  “It is time for your walk.”  He didn’t bother to look at anyone other than Richard as he left the room, but not even a glance was sent his way.  It bothered him more than he wanted to admit.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The evenings patrol had been quiet, and Damian found himself thankful for that given his mind kept going back to what had transpired at breakfast earlier in the day.  He could tell Richard was still upset about the events, but Damian had no idea how to make the situation better.  He didn’t want to encourage Richard’s crush given that yeah…maybe him and Jon were something to one another.  But he also didn’t want to stop him from behaving as a young teenager should.  The only thing he could think of to do was request that Robin join Nightwing on patrol instead of Batman.

And though the teen was a vigilant as ever, Damian knew him well enough to notice that he was always just on the edge of saying something.  It wasn’t until they took a moment to just observe the city below them that he seemed to have gained the courage.

“D…” he started, and Damian bit his tongue at the reprimand that wanted to surface at the nickname.  “I’m sorry I said I was gonna marry Jon,” the teen said quietly, latching onto Damian’s wrist.  The apology was definitely not what the elder had expected.  “I didn’t know you were dating.”  And though the almost heartbroken sound of Richard’s voice made his chest ache, Damian wasn’t sure what to say.

“N-No names in the field, Robin,” he chastised him carefully.  What was he supposed to say to Richard?  He didn’t want to lie but he also didn’t want to explain something he wasn’t even quite sure of himself.  The fact that Jason had picked up on it was enough to show that perhaps Damian wasn’t keeping his feelings as under wraps as he thought.  “Let’s head back.  I do not think there is any reason for us to remain out tonight.  We can have some hot chocolate before bed,” he offered as an acceptance of the apology.

And when Richard’s smile went from sad to it’s usual brilliance, Damian knew he had made the right call.  What the consequences of his lack of denial would be, he’d have to deal with them later.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had been a few days since the incident that shall not be named took place and Damian found himself letting Jon into his Bludhaven apartment after having just handed Richard over to Alfred to take home after he had stayed over for the weekend.  He hadn’t been expecting his best friend, but he didn’t find it an unpleasant surprise so he didn’t complain.

“Dick already gone?” Jon questioned, glancing around to see the chaos the teen had left behind but not the teen himself.  Damian only hummed with a nod as he picked up various items the teen had upended or left behind.  He made a pile of things to wash and things to return the next time he was in Gotham, which likely would be in the next day or so.  “So….”

Damian looked at Jon over his shoulder and raised an eyebrow, noticing he was rubbing the back of his neck.  The bashful act immediately put Damian on edge.  “What?”

“Why did Dick tell me that he approves of our relationship?”  Damian froze in mid reach for an item and instead stood up, arms crossed over his chest. He knew he looked as annoyed as he felt. Damnit Richard.  “Are we in a relationship?”  

Damian huffed a breath. “Ignore him.  It was Jason who put the thought in his head the other morning,” he waved a hand at the other man and went back to picking up the items strewn about his apartment.  

“But now I’m very curious as to what exactly happened,” Jon teased, and Damian sent him an annoyed look before entering his room and depositing the laundry into his dirty clothes hamper. He knew that Jon would follow him, but he still rolled his eyes when he turned and found the taller man leaning on the frame of the doorway.  “And maybe I don’t want to ignore what Dick said.”  That caused Damian freeze for the second time in a matter of minutes.

“What exactly are you implying here, Kent?”  He let the laundry basket drop the few inches he had picked it up back to the floor, turning to find the man standing just behind him.  “Jon?”

Jon’s blue eyes traced over Damian’s face and the older man found himself holding his breath as the man searched for whatever it was he was hoping to find.  “Maybe I’ve just been waiting for some kind of hint and Dick finally gave it to me…”  Whatever Jon had been looking for he must have found because his warm hands rose to cup Damian’s face as Jon stepped a bit closer.  

“A hint toward what?” Damian whispered, focusing all his strength at resisting the urge to look down to Jon’s lips that were moving closer with each passing moment.

“That this would be a welcomed gesture,” the man muttered, leaning forward and effectively closing the space between their mouths.  And though shock reverberated through his body, Damian allowed his eyes to slip shut so he could enjoy the moment for however long Jon allowed it to take place. If he was going to offer this side of him so freely to Damian, who was Damian to deny him something he himself had been yearning for for years?

[voiceless-terror]

hi friend!!!! i love your writing!!! if you're taking prompts from the bingo card (if you're not then feel free to delete this!!), how about N5 for Jon? :) i hope you have a great day!!

‘fighting to pay attention to urgent information’ ahh i love this prompt!! thank you so much for the ask, it means a lot since i love your writing so much (and it  inspired me to starting posting my stuff, to be honest). Here you go, I hope you like! This takes place right after Sasha makes her statement to Jon in season one.

Sasha is talking but Jon can’t hear her.

It’s all muddled in his mind. So many things have happened over the last couple of weeks- Martin’s worm attack and now Sasha’s encounter with Michael- and his mind is refusing to process. She gave her statement in his office and was now explaining the situation to Martin and Tim while Jon stood awkwardly in the doorway, trying to nod at the appropriate time.

“We’ll need a plan of attack if Prentiss comes or if any of us encounter Michael again,” she’s saying. “Martin’s already living here, but-”

A plan. Yes. A plan would be good but Jon can’t think beyond Sasha bleeding in his office and Martin throwing open his door demanding to be heard. The worms on the pavement crawl and creep and remind him of something he thought he’d finally put behind him but he’s been chasing it the entire time, hasn’t he?

His body feels at once too hot and too cold. Jon’s never understood that about illness. How a body can burn with fever and shake with a chill at the same time. But he’s not sick, he’s just...overwhelmed. Needs to eat a normal meal, needs to get some sleep. If he could just get a deep breath in his lungs the black spots would stop dancing in front of his vision and he could pay attention and come up with a plan. 

But every other word is ‘worms’ and ‘infestation’ and all matter of disturbing things and his mind goes wild with imagination, horrible scenarios playing out in his mind as his breaths turn into an uneven staccato of sound that he tries to stifle.

“-could get more CO2 you think? Jon?” That’s your name.

“A-Ah, yes. I’ll t-talk to Elias.” Sasha nods and Jon is relieved to have said the right thing. The fog in his brain lifts; the panic eases for just a few moments but it only reveals more physical pain and he starts to shake. He knows he needs to sit down soon or he’ll be lying on the ground either way. So he slowly backs out of the room, hoping no one notices as his hands grasp at the wall for balance. He manages to stumble back to Document Storage before he hears someone calling his name. But he’s lost now, barely breathing as his heart stutters in his chest and he sinks to the floor.

________

Martin had been watching Jon while Sasha spoke. Martin watched Jon a lot- innocently, of course, and Jon never seemed to notice. He was either willfully ignorant or really that oblivious. 

Martin was starting to double down on the ‘willfully ignorant’ theory. 

Jon was nodding along, sure. But his face held a detached blankness, as if each word were in one ear and out the other. Of course he would zone out during this conversation; it involved real, actual supernatural occurrences. He only contributed once, a vague promise to talk to Elias, who was turning out to be a very useless manager. Martin thought Jon was getting better about this. After all, he seemed to believe both Martin and Sasha’s stories. But he watched as Jon moved further and further out of the room when he should be contributing to the conversation. He disappeared down the hallway and Martin let out an irritated sigh, drawing Tim and Sasha’s attention.

“What’s up?” Tim asked from his perch on Sasha’s desk. “Don’t worry, we’re gonna figure this out-”

“It’s not-” Martin got up, starting to make his way down the hallway. “It’s Jon. I can’t believe he would just walk out on this. I’m going to go talk to him.”

“Martin-” Sasha sounded hesitant but he ignored her as he spotted the open door to Document Storage. Why would Jon go  here instead of his office? This was Martin’s room with his things. And I didn’t exactly keep it clean. “Jon?” he called out. “Jon, you need to- what are you doing?”

The man was leaning against his cot, knees brought up to his chest as he stared at the floor. His glasses were tucked into his sweater and his hair was a mess, as if he’d been running his fingers through it. And he was ignoring Martin in favor of whatever the hell he found so interesting about the floor. Martin stooped down to his level, ignoring the twinge in his knees on the cold cement. “What’s going on?” he asked again, trying to keep the annoyance out of his voice. God, Jon could be so infuriating at times, but he was still concerned.

Jon barely spared him a glance and tightened his arms around his knees, looking like a ball of tension. His shoulders moved very minutely upwards in a sort of shrugging motion and Martin thought he heard a mumble of ‘’nothing, fine,” under his breath and he couldn’t help but roll his eyes. He moved in closer, setting a firm hand on Jon’s bony shoulder- when did he get so thin?

“Look, I know it’s a lot,” Martin tried for comfort, though it was getting harder and harder to do so these days when the man refused to see reason. “But you can’t just bury your head in the sand whenever someone says something you don’t want to hear, alright? We’re all struggling and it would be a lot easier if we had a boss who actually listened instead of- shit.”

Jon was shaking so much. How had he not noticed? His breathing was off, like a sputtering engine as his white-knuckled grip dug into his knees. His face was ashen and sweaty. He was clearly unwell but he opened his mouth anyway in an attempt to respond. His eyes did not meet Martin’s.

“It’s- it’s all I think about,” he began, his voice more of a croak than the smooth baritone Martin was used to. “She’s after us, after you and Sasha and now there’s Michael and I don’t know what to do.” Martin watched in horror as his eyes filled with tears and his voice trembled. “And- and what if I go home and she’s waiting there? What if she gets Tim? What if we aren’t safe anywhere?” A slender hand shot out and grabbed onto Martin’s sweater, startling him as Jon’s eyes met his own with a desperate fervor. “I-I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. And Elias doesn’t even care, just w-watches while we all scramble around doing- doing-” his voice broke into a hacking cough and Martin couldn’t witness any more. He dislodged Jon’s hand and backed away. Seeing Jon like this was uncomfortable and he wasn’t sure what to do about it, so he went into his natural problem-solving mode. “I’m going to get you some water, yeah? You’re- you’re not well, we can talk about this later.” Despite keeping his voice soft and low, Martin watched as Jon shrunk into himself, desperately trying to stifle his coughs. “I’ll be right back.”

He hightailed it out of the storage area, eyes firmly on the ground and steps so quick he didn’t notice Tim until he ran right into him.

“Oof! What’s wrong, Martin?” Tim said as he grabbed him by the shoulder. “Boss giving you trouble?” Martin shook his head, voicing his next words as diplomatically as possible. 

“He’s, um- I think he’s sick?” Tim’s brow furrowed in concern. “I’m just going to get him some water, yeah.” He walked off before Tim could ask another question; he didn’t want to leave Jon alone for too long but he also didn’t want to be subjected to Tim’s questioning.

It only took him a couple of minutes to grab some water and a cold towel but by the time he got back to the room Jon was laid out on his cot, eyes barely open as Tim said something Martin couldn’t hear and smiled softly at the man in the bed. He knew they’d all known each other before the Archives; it was something that he thought about quite a bit, to be honest. But he’d never really seen Jon interact with someone like this, so quiet and trusting that he nodded off right in front of them.  

“There you are!” Tim said, uncharacteristically quiet. He reached out and Martin handed over the supplies, still stupefied by the whole situation. 

“Just gonna let him sleep for a mo’ before I force this down his throat,” he chuckled as he gently placed the towel on his forehead. “Glad you checked up on him- didn’t realize he was having a rough go of it. I’m usually a bit more observant.”

“We’re all having a rough go of it, Tim,” Martin felt like he had to explain some of his frustration. “How did he let himself get to this point? I mean, he’s always so skeptical on the tapes but it turns out he’s worked himself up so much he’s sick and it doesn’t make any sense.”

“We all tell our lies, Martin,” The words weren’t said unkindly, but he remembered that Tim knew about his resume and though he didn’t think the man would ever tell anyone it did seem like the words were rather pointed. “His coping mechanism is all this skeptic nonsense. Don’t get me wrong, it’s terrible and very annoying,” Tim conceded, giving Martin a knowing look. “But not all of us ended up here accidentally. Most of us are here for answers. For a reason.” Tim’s far off look reminded him that he knew so little about the people he worked with. He wondered what Tim’s reason was, what Jon’s was. And if they would ever feel comfortable enough to confide in him. 

Martin doesn’t know how to respond to those words, so he does what he does best- deflect and nervously offer his services. “I can throw the kettle on, maybe order some takeaway? Food would probably make him feel better.” 

“Yeah, reckon it would,” Tim’s just staring at Jon as he fitfully dozed. Tim may not have been attacked directly but he looked tired and worried all the same. “He likes Thai.”

Martin noted the fact down for his mental file on Jonathan Sims. Hates spiders. Likes his tea with milk, no sugar. Hates my handwriting. Likes Thai. It’s not very comprehensive.

Later, when he’s making tea in the break room, he watches as Sasha slips into the hallway to Document Storage, attempting to go unnoticed. She’s got a hand to her shoulder like she’s trying to rub away the ache and Martin grabs some paracetamol out of the cabinet, knowing both her and Jon will need it. Everyone in the Archives likes to hide their pain, himself included. But maybe for one night they could help each other out. Four tired humans against two eldritch abominations.

Martin could get behind those odds.

ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27065482

[kpop-zone]

Home with you | Sana

Genre: angst (fluff maybe at the end?)

Wordcount: 1,708

Request: hi, can i request something w/ twice’s sana & idol!fem reader? can you also make it angst but w/ a happy ending? thank you so much !

A/N: So I wrote this for a request, but then another request came in that was really similar to this (shoutout to the anon who can apparantely read my thoughts :D), but not quite. So I never posted it. But I couldn’t just delete it, so here it is. Basically, the twin sister of ‘Pieces’ :D

If you could turn back time right in this moment you would. What was it all good for? If you started again and didn’t repeat your mistakes, you could save yourself a lot of pain. But it was your own fault. You knew that you were getting attached to the industry’s biggest flirt, so it was bound to leave you scarred.

Your relationship with Sana started about two years ago and everything was fine in the beginning. You had met because one of your group members, Eunha, was befriended with Sana and one day you all went out for a coffee together. The both of you immediately clicked and the coffee date slowly turned into a real one with Eunha being the third wheel. After that, you exchanged numbers and stayed in contact, despite both of your busy schedules. Because it was known that Eunha and Sana were really good friends, you used the opportunity to go on dates under the pretext that it was just some friends catching up together. It didn’t take long for Sana to ask you to be her girlfriend and you were more than happy to accept.

You should have probably thought about the consequences of dating a fellow idol with no chance to go public a little earlier. Now two years later, all you were left with was a broken heart. It was a gradual process. You knew that Sana was flirty with almost everyone but you in public, because you couldn’t risk anyone getting suspicious. It was easy for you to accept her being touchy with her fellow members. You knew that they basically spent their entire youth together and that this created a bond for life.

But when Sana started to flirt with people outside her group, the jealousy began bubbling inside of you. You didn’t want to be unfair though, so you let it go. It was simply Sana’s personality and you trusted her, you thought to yourself. She would never cheat on you. They were nothing more but friends. Even if fans were going crazy and started shipping Sana with all kind of idols. You tried to not let yourself get soaked into all of this gossip.

At one point, however, things were getting out of hand. Sana was getting particularly touchy with only one idol. Jungkook. During award shows BTS and Twice would always stand next to each other, giving them the chance to interact. Being two of the most popular groups, fans started shipping Sana and Jungkook immediately after they were seen joking around together. You didn’t think much of it at first, but slowly, you couldn’t help but think that Sana even enjoyed being shipped with him.

Normally, she wouldn’t do anything to fire up rumors, but this time, it seemed like she wanted to cause a scandal. Doing aegyo for him, batting her eyelashes and pretending to be flustered about the things he whispered into her ears. And all you could do was stand right next to her. Watching her flirt with other people, if just playful or serious. And it hurt. It hurt because she didn’t even try to consider your feelings and it hurt because you knew that this could never be the two of you. And so you felt your heart gradually crumbling.

The last straw, however, only happened barely an hour ago. You were actually on your way to your girlfriend, browsing the internet in the back of the car, when one particular headline spread like a wildfire on all important news pages:

“Twice’s Sana and BTS’ Jungkook spotted on a date.”

You were slightly chuckling to yourself, thinking it was just another clickbait, but when you clicked on one article, you couldn’t believe your eyes. There were pictures showing your girlfriend on what seemed like an actual date with Jungkook. They were taking a walk in a park, all bundled up to hide from the paparazzi, but actually making them even easier to spot.

What was Sana doing?

Just when you were about to read the article, your cellphone rang: Sana.

Of course she would call now. But you didn’t want to see her right now, even less so talk to her. You rejected her call and told your driver to bring you to a nearby park instead. You needed to clear your head. As you were walking around, you reflected Sana’s and your relationship. Where did it all go wrong? Or was it maybe wrong from the beginning? Maybe it was simply a lost cause. You sat on a bench, burying your head into your jacket as far as you could to protect yourself from the cold. You were about to make a decision whether it was time to end this game, when you could hear steps from behind,

“Y/N?”

You heard the soft voice from your girlfriend. You didn’t need to turn around to know that she had been crying. The sadness in her voice was not to ignore. But you didn’t bother to turn around.

“Y/N.”

She repeated another time, making her way around the bench, ending up crouching down in front of you with her hands supporting herself on your legs.

“Please listen to me.”

She whispered while some tears were leaving marks on her cheeks. You were just too tired. You gave your all into this relationship and you were empty now. You wanted to leave, but you were even too tired to do that. So you stayed, not looking into your girlfriend’s eyes.

“It’s not what it looks like, Y/N. I promise.”

She sobbed.

“Please just look at me.”

She took your chin softly into her hand, turning it to face her. Her puffy eyes hurt you. After all this time. After the flirting, the shipping and the rumors. After everything, the thing that could still hurt you the most, was your girlfriend being sad.

“I love you, Y/N. You know I do.”

You laughed mockingly at Sana’s words.

“Oh do you now? How could you have taken your flirting then far enough that there are actual pictures of you with him?”

You spat out, now feeling your own tears stinging in your eyes.

“I’m sorry. I never meant for it to go this far.”

She cried out, now starting to cling to your jacket as if she needed something to hold on to in order to not lose it completely.

“It didn’t mean anything to me. You have to believe me. I only want you.”

She tried to reach out to your face, but you flinched to avoid her touch.

“I don’t care anymore, Sana. What are we even doing? Our relationship is leading to nowhere. The sooner we get that, the more pain we can safe us.”

You stood up, causing Sana to lose her balance and almost tumbling over, but she caught herself the last second, sprinting behind you instead and getting a hold of your arm. You had to turn around to get rid of Sana’s hand, but the moment you were facing her, she pressed her lips against yours. You stumbled back in surprise.

“Sana! What the hell are you doing? We could be seen!”

“I don’t care. Then let them see us. I’m dating you. No one else.”

She responded, while getting a hold of your neck again, trying to pull you into another kiss.

“Sana stop! Can’t you see? It’s too late. If I were important to you, you wouldn’t go on dates with other people.”

You yelled at her, now 100% sure that you drew the attention of the other park visitors to you.

“It wasn’t a date! It was all a PR stunt to promote our comeback. To draw attention to us.”

She huffed defeated, massaging her temples in frustration.

“I know this isn’t an apology. And it isn’t supposed to be one. I behaved like an asshole, I know that. I should have declined the proposition or at least talked with you about it. So you can call me a bad girlfriend, but don’t ever doubt my feelings for you!”

She begged you, while you were staring at her in disbelief.

“Why didn’t you talk with me about it?”

You wondered out loud.

“Because this was all I wanted for us. I wanted people to ship us, because we couldn’t keep our eyes to ourselves at award shows. I wanted the paparazzi to chase behind us to be able to reveal pictures of us kissing. I wanted us to have the chance of a real relationship that didn’t only exist behind closed doors. I just wanted to know how all of this felt like.”

Tears silently fell from your eyes. How could you be mad at her for this? It would be selfish to hold her back from what she wanted.

“I guess, I should let you go then. I want you to be happy, Sana. You should have everything you want.”

You said silently, not wanting to hear your own words, because they felt like blades cutting you open.

“But I don’t want to have a relationship if it’s not with you!”

Sana yelled at you. Your sobs where making your whole body shake by now, making Sana wrap her arms around you, holding you close.

“I don’t want to lose you, Y/N. Or did I already?”

She asked searching for your eyes once you had calmed down a bit.

“No.”

You whispered, now it being you who grabbed a fistful of her coat to have something to hold on to. She pulled you closer by your neck, your noses touching.

“I’m going to be better. I swear.”

You nodded hardly noticeable.

“Let’s just leave for a while. Only the two of us. Let’s fix this. Us.”

She pleaded while pulling at your clothes in desperation.

Normally you would be rational right now. You were idols, you couldn’t just leave. But right now, you didn’t care. You decided to pretend for a while. Like you actually could steal a few weeks to fix what was broken between Sana and you. You just wanted to go somewhere with her. You didn’t care where. Everywhere with Sana was home.

[feynavaley]

Headcanon: America is some sort of Instagram celebrity.

It happens almost by mistake. He’s not the only personification with an Instagram account – however, unlike most of the others, he sets it as public. And, since Alfred is a handsome and extroverted 19-year-old who posts a lot of pictures and videos (goofy selfies, snaps of mundane and relatable moments, outdoor activities, places he’s visiting...) he quickly gains followers.

Along with his growing fame, the ‘mystery’ surrounding his identity develops as well. The thing is that, in spite of being extremely extroverted and bubbly and posting many daily anecdotes, America doesn’t actually reveal much personal info. This only makes the interest bloom. He’s known as ‘Al Jones’ (and his handle is ‘alamericajones’), there are many speculations on what his full name is. Ironically, Alfred is very low on the list as it’s almost unheard of for a modern teenager. There are also different theories on where he lives as he posts from all over the United States. Some of the more accredited speculations are NYC, Washington DC, or Los Angeles, but nobody knows for sure and there are many others.

With time, people start noticing that pictures Al claims are taken at his own house don’t match, they clearly belong to different buildings. Somebody says he’s lying – a teen who isn’t even old enough to drink alcohol owning multiple apartments is ridiculous. Others suggest that he may come from a very rich family and the houses belong to his parents.

Al’s family is another puzzle, however. He never posts pictures with his parents or even mentions them, which is kind of odd, considering he overshares in many other departments. (Somebody says it might be to respect their privacy, but then again, it’s still weird that there isn’t even a single mention. Besides, Al doesn’t seem to worry too much about privacy when it comes to other people who are often featured on his account.) A frequent feature on Al’s Instagram is, instead, another teen-aged guy who looks a lot like him and Al calls his ‘little bro’ in the caption of their first picture he posted. The event causes an uproar, but the enthusiasm turns into disappointment as people realize that the brother’s profile is set as private. All they can see is his name, Matthew W. (The ‘W’ is universally assumed to be the first letter of his second name – the most accredited guess being ‘William’ – as his surname, logically, must be Jones.) What immediately jumps to the eye is Matthew’s handle, ‘matthew.canada’. People are ready to shrug it off as just an oddity until somebody notices that many pictures featuring Matthew are, indeed, taken in Canada; almost as if Matthew lived there. Al never gives an explanation. The first tentative guess is that Matthew is studying or working in Canada, but as time goes by, it becomes clearer and clearer that Matthew has a distinctly Canadian feel to him. In addition to his handle, he often has a stylized maple leaf somewhere on his clothes, Al says complains in some captions that ‘Mattie’ doesn’t feel the cold and mocks him in others for how he cannot handle the heat... Moreover, the few times Matthew comments under Al’s pictures, he uses the British spelling and Canadian idioms. He gives the impression of being somebody born and raised in Canada. However, the tentative guess that Al might have moved out for work is shot down as Al is, instead, undeniably American to the core. In the end, the most accredited theory is that one of their parents is American and the other Canadian. Al doesn’t comment, and any further attempt to get an insight on the matter is thwarted by the fact nobody can find a Matthew Jones matching the face in Al’s pictures.

Even odder is the second person Alfred refers to as his brother, a grumpy guy named Arthur who, instead, doesn’t look like Alfred at all. He appears less than Matthew, always scowling, and his pictures are often deleted not long later. He also frequently posts sarcastic comments under Al’s pictures, though. His profile is private as well, but his name is listed as ‘Arthur Kirkland’ and his profile picture shows the Big Ben. Not to mention, he undeniably uses BrE in his comments. People are confused. Alfred’s unhelpful answer, this time, is ‘my family’s complicated 🙂’ and he leaves it there. Some people claim Arthur is Alfred’s half-brother or step-brother, somebody even suggests Arthur isn’t related to Alfred at all but a person Alfred calls his ‘older brother’ in a metaphorical sense as he looks up to him. (Nobody knows that Alfred has to use all his self-control not to correct the assumption and accidentally reveal something, nor do they have any idea of the smug smile curving Arthur’s lips as he reads the comment and calls an intern to have it screenshotted. From time to time, he brings it up to tease Alfred.) Once again, however, nothing concrete can be found.

There is also the mystery of what Al’s job is. The option he’s attending university/college is soon discarded as Al never mentions studying but some comments allude to him having a job. From time to time, he complains about his boss being unreasonable. Al isn’t even just a blogger as, anytime he mentioned his job, he talked about paperwork (something like a selfie of him at the desk with a sad face and a caption that said ‘wasting this sunny day inside bc I’m buried in paperwork 😞😭’) or having a meeting. Al is oddly cryptic about the nature of these meetings, but it’s clear he often has to go abroad for them. There are also pictures of him with people he calls his coworkers or colleagues – all young people of different nationalities, none of which looks older than their mid-twenties. Nobody can figure out which job can entail something like that. When a person suggests they’re all international spies or agents, it’s laughed off as a joke. (The theory keeps resurfacing from time to time, though. It’s clearly not the truth, and at the same time, it’s the only one that could logically explain everything...)

But this isn’t where the oddities stop. Al is good-natured and goofy, but some of the pictures and stories he posts are... concerning. His parkour stunts hardly raise any eyebrow as he clearly knows what he’s doing, but other things... getting way too close to dangerous wild animals... hiking away from the trail and in bad weather condition... and once Al posts a picture showing a bandaged arm with the caption ‘Mattie’s bear didn’t want to cuddle with me 😟’. It would be taken as a joke, if it weren’t for the polar bear cub (with an oddly smug expression) in a corner of the photo. The uproar is so big – people calling Al stupid for getting close to a bear, saying he’s a bad role-model for celebrating this act of idiocy that didn’t end badly only thanks to his spectacular luck, people worried for a bear being kept in a house, people threatening to report Al and Matthew for animal abuse – that it ends up being deleted. The incident is fresh on many people’s minds, however. Al may always come out of his adventures unscathed, but they start making some people uncomfortable. The most charitable ones are worried about Alfred’s recklessness, others start saying that it’s all a hoax of a bored teen who wanted to be an online celebrity or even a social experiment. Either way, it’s all fake. The pictures are photoshopped (even if with incredible skills, as there’s no visible evidence of that), and he uses friends’ houses to pretend to be in different locations. Al proclaims himself innocent, he seems genuinely upset for not being believed. He doesn’t spend too much energy trying to clear his name, though.

After a bit, people are genuinely confused about what’s going on with Al. The theories – on his behaviour, on whether it’s fake or real, on which part is real and which part invented – keep multiplying and becoming wilder and wilder. And in all this, America doesn’t care. He finds all the speculations amusing (and, unlike other personifications, he isn’t concerned about them as nobody ever got close to the truth, he doesn’t think there’s any danger of his identity being exposed) – but what he truly enjoys is sharing his days with people who are genuinely interested. Even if it’s all virtual, it’s still a part of the human interactions he craves for so much.

[japanimee]

home (sero hanta x reader)

summary/background after your boyfriend, sero, breaks up with you, you go home to visit your family. meanwhile, sero realizes that the reason he broke up with you was dumb. you were home, but sero discovers that his home was with you. (pt. 2!)

warning(s) angst, profanity

gif credit belongs to @foolishchesspawn​

sero had never felt so... wrong.

it was strange to wake up in an empty bed, and know that it would remain that way. some mornings you’d come straight from your apartment and fall into the covers with him, giggling and loving on him until noon. the notion alone made him feel colder than ever. whether than cold was physical or simply coursing through his nerves, he couldn’t tell.

he was scrolling through his instagram feed, wrapped up in blankets. it was one of those days where he couldn’t get himself out of bed. on these mornings, you’d always barge in and drag him out while giggling. and he’d start laughing, too. but he had ruined that.

with these thoughts in mind, he looked for your profile. seeing you had one new post, his thumb hovered over the profile. he knew if one of his friends had been there, they would’ve told him not to do it. though he was the one being stupid, they don’t need him any more hurt than he already is.

he looked over your profile picture, seeing a picture of you smiling instead of the picture of you on his back. with a sigh, he clicked onto your profile.

almost everything was the same as it was a week ago. his name was taken out of your bio, his face was taken out of your profile picture, and any photos of the two of you together was either deleted or archived. he didn’t know which he would’ve preferred. he wondered if you or mina had been the one to take them down in the first place.

he clicked onto your newest post. it was a picture of you with a goofy smile that made him smile despite himself. you were laying somewhere, one of your siblings making a face at the flash of your camera. a different sibling was a simple blur in the background, obviously laughing.

lovinyn family therapy <3

though the picture was only posted an hour ago, it had over six hundred likes and many comments already.

queenoaliens my favs!! tell my real parents i love them

bakusplosion say bye before you leave next time..

sharkiri take your time at home! we’ll be here when you get back <3

pikadenki bring home some brownies o.o

allmightfan1 tell your siblings to be careful!! looks like s/n’s falling...

ribbitkawaii @//pikadenki i second the brownies motion...

jiradio missin u

snrox getting rid of toxic vibes check

after reading that last comment, he quickly shut off his phone, sighing heavily with a frustrated groan. he buried his head back into his pillow. his heart ached uncontrollably, and the ache spread through his chest, into his neck, and tickled his brain. god, he was an idiot.

“i think we need to break up,” he said, so softly that he prayed you hadn’t heard it. prayed he could take it back before you even knew. he felt his own heart stop.

“what?” you breathed, breaking away from the arm over your shoulder, your eyes catching his in an instant. he turned his gaze away. “hanta, what?”

he took a breath, remembering the words he had practiced in the mirror days before. “i don’t love you anymore.” and he looked up to meet your eyes.

he watched your heart break. “wh-what?” your voice was hushed now, choked. you scooted farther away from him, and he felt unbearably cold. cold and wrong. “y-you don’t... anymore?” you brought your shaking hands up to your face, holding them over your eyes for a moment as you tried to compose yourself.

he wanted so desperately to take it back, to stop the cold and wrongness from coursing through his veins. he reached a hand out, but you stood in that instant. tears streamed down your face as you made for the door.

“mina will be here to get my stuff tomorrow.”

your voice was cold now, trying to brush him off.

“y/n-”

“what,” you demanded, whipping around to him. but as he looked into your watery eyes, your upset expression, he couldn’t find words. you just sighed, grabbing your jacket from the coat rack and leaving before he could blink again.

he looked at his reflection in the black screen of his phone, seeing nothing but tired eyes and a deep frown. he closed his eyes and sighed, slipping his phone into the pocket of his sweatpants before shaking his covers off and getting out of bed.

when he entered his bathroom, looking into the mirror was a chore. all he saw in his reflection was a broken half; half of a whole he had broken.

“you’re a fucking idiot,” was the first thing bakugou said when sero finally picked up his phone. before he could retort, he threw out again, “what the hell were you thinking? oh hey, life’s good, time to throw out the best fucking part of it?! where do you get off?!”

sero hung up before anything else could be said, dropping his head in his hands. his phone dinged with another notification and he took a deep breath before picking the device back up. he had ignored so many texts that morning.

bakugou pick up your goddamn phone.

eijiro call me when you can eijiro what happened man?

ashido did something happen with you and y/n ? ashido she’s at my apartment balling !

denki are you okay?

ashido you’re an asshole.

eijiro im coming over.

and most recently:

yn <3 mina will be over around three.

he dropped his phone onto the floor. he didn’t look at it again until the next day. 

after he finally showered, he sat down for breakfast in a kitchen that felt too empty. if you weren’t falling into bed with him in the mornings, you were dragging him out to a breakfast you had perfectly prepared for him. he’d always shower you in kisses before he ate, and you’d giggle the entire time. his heart ached at the memory.

to distract himself, he got his phone back out, opening up instagram again. he scrolled through some of his friends’ pictures until he found that your sibling had posted something, halting his actions. he had forgotten that he was following them.

there were three pictures: one of you leaning against their shoulder, the light of your phone illuminating your upset features, another of you with uno cards in your hand, but staring at the wall instead of the game or your other participating family, and the final of your mother frowning and holding you in her arms, her eyes shut as your expression was tired and upset.

snrox @ the asshole that broke my sister’s heart, fuck you

queenoaliens who taught you cuss words???

snrox ... @//bakusplosion

bakusplosion @//snrox not cool.

despite the cruel, heartbreaking post, he missed your family. he remembered the first time he met them; your siblings stuck to him like glue, asking him questions left and right as you laughed and batted them away. your parents were patient and kind with him, though your father made a few jabs at him. he was even missing those little threats and promises.

he wished he had never done it. but he felt like he wasn’t good enough for you. like he’d never be. if you were there, hearing these thoughts, you’d kiss him into next week. you’d shower him with your love and affection until he was smiling again with you in his arms. but after you’d leave, he’d just feel like he’d further proven his point.

so he knew to get rid of this feeling, he had to get rid of you. and it would hurt like hell, but he knew some guy out there was perfect for you, enough for you. and he was waiting for you. and who was some boring guy like him to be standing in the way?

but he missed your smile. he missed how warm you always were, even when you said you were cold. he missed teasing you about “making up excuses to cuddle”. he missed the way you’d light up a room. he missed how every insecurity he had would disappear with you, because you made him feel perfect.

“im gonna kick his ass into next week,” mina grumbled as she watched you frown at yourself in the bathroom mirror. you let out a short laugh and bowed your head. “fuck that, next month.”

“mina, don’t,” you said, sliding your hand against the counter as you turned to look at her.

she sighed as you looked back at your reflection, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. “i hate seeing you look into the mirror like that.”

your head turned back to her. “like what?”

“like there’s something wrong with what you’re seeing,” she said gently, stepping closer to you. you sniffed, your frown deepening. she quickly wrapped her arms around you.

“but there has to be,” you choked, squeezing your eyes shut as hot tears fell.

“no, no,” she soothed, pressing her face into your hair as you hiccuped into her shoulder. “there’s nothing wrong with you. sero is such an idiot. you’re absolutely perfect.”

“then why doesn’t he want me?” you whispered, so softly it was almost muffled by her shoulder.

she placed her chin atop your head, looking at her own murderous expression in the mirror. she didn’t answer.

you laughed as your older sibling dragged you onto the roof of your house. when you were younger, it was where you’d take each other when things got hard and all you needed were the stars and the rolling sight of your hometown.

“oh! i forgot something!” they hummed. “i’ll be right back!”

they slipped back into the cracked window. you shoved your hands in your pockets, looking out on the familiar town. it had been so long since you’d been home. the last time you were here was with him...

you shook the thought out easily. you ignored the buzzing of your phone as you looked up to the stars in the sky. the overwhelming sight made your head spin, and you giggled at yourself as you carefully sat and laid down. the buzzing stopped after you pieced together three familiar constellations.

it started again, but you ignored it again. you just wanted to feel the breeze of home air, to let yourself get lost like you used to. and it was so easy to get lost in the simple place that was home. all you had dreamed of back then was leaving that town, getting into the world. now all you wanted to do was lay there forever. well, maybe with mina by your side. the buzzing stopped.

you closed your eyes, letting your nose flood with the scents of your mom’s homemade dinner leaking through the open kitchen window. as that breeze whipped through again, your mind finally cleared. your heart felt a little lighter.

then the buzzing started again. with a jolt, you sat up. you slipped your phone out of your back pocket, and almost froze.

sero hanta </3 is calling... 

accept/deny

your heart raced in your chest. you glanced down briefly to see if your sibling was heading back up. you couldn’t tell. you gulped.

accept.

“hello..?” you said carefully, hoping he had misdialed, hoping he would hang up at the sound of your voice. hoping he wasn’t calling to break your heart any more after you went to the only place that could piece it back together.

“i made a mistake.”

[shawnpetermuffins]

I Miss You

A/n: I hope this is good because I put this off for so long wanting to do it justice. And this is based very loosely off I Miss you.

Summary: you two broke up recently, and it's not sitting well with Shawn, even though he's the reason you broke up.

Requested by @it-isnt-in-myy-blood: Hi, I recently listened to the song 'I Miss you' (Clean Bandit, Julia Michaels). Maybe you could write a fic based on the song, angsty but with a fluff ending? Thank you... ❤️

***

Kinda_yourname

2,158 likes

Kinda_yourname Cabo sunsets >>>> anything else

•

It may have only been a week, but I'm missing it here! 😭

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I shut my phone off and toss it to the end of the bed. I should have been with her on that trip, but tour got in the way. I got in the way. It's crazy to think that if you asked me three weeks ago, I would have said that my girlfriend and I could overcome any obstacle thrown at us. But ask me again a week later, and I would tell you I was wrong. That being away from her for months at a time was too much for me and I broke it off because I thought it would be what was best for both of us in the end.

Now ask me if I still believe that.

I don't.

I haven't told anyone about us yet. I mean, everyone probably suspects because there haven't been Amy preshow FaceTime calls for good luck, and I'm not texting like a madman during dinner or when we're on our way to the venues. And I know she hasn't said anything to anyone either. How? Because for one, she hasn't blocked me on any social media - I know, I've checked at least ten times just within the last two hours. And two, she hasn't deleted the three pictures of us that she has on her Instagram. They're still there for everyone to see, me included.

Now my fingers are hovering over the keyboard and I'm staring at her name on my phone which is still My Love 😍, and I'll probably never change it. Because she is my love, and to strip her of that title because I'm an idiot just isn't fair.

Hey... I miss you

I type and backspace and type and backspace at least ten times. Because I want to text her. I want so badly to text her, but what if she doesn't want to hear from me? I wouldn't blame her if she didn't want to. I was the worst. Breaking up with her over the phone, no less because I was hurting being away from her. Never once did it occur to me that, yeah, she was hurting too. Or maybe she's with someone else. Maybe she's found somebody new. I want her happy, sure. But I selfishly still want to be the one that makes her happy.

Y/n I miss you.

I delete it one last time and open my photo gallery. I have an album saved for photos of us. Photos that I never got to post because she wanted to keep us as private as possible without being a secret. Which is why both of us only have 3 photos of each other on our Instagram. One for our six months, a year, and a year and a half. Two more months and we would have had a fourth picture.

I'm swiping through the photos landing on one I took of her when we were flying back to Canada after our first trip together. We're on a private jet because this was before we went public with our relationship. Andrew made sure that we weren't seen together in the airport or anything. She's sitting in the seat across the aisle from me, legs up to her chest, earphones in, head resting on her knees as she smiles brightly at me. There's another one of us curled up together on this tiny chair in a green room in the UK that Andrew sent me. She's literally curled into a ball on my lap, sleeping peacefully and my legs are spread in front of me, arms wrapped tightly around her body, head resting against the back of the seat.

The next one Brian took. We were at my place for a very impromptu new years party. It was just gonna be me and y/n, but she insisted we invite the guys over. And we did. It was one of the best nights of my life. We're watching the ball drop, with her in my lap, arm around my shoulder. I have one arm behind her back, the other on her thigh. I think Brian knew something was going to happen because at ten seconds to midnight he pulled his phone out and captured out first new years kiss. She's holding my face and I'm practically leaning her back against the couch. It looks like I'm seconds away from crawling on top of her, and it be honest, I probably was. She's just too perfect for me to resist.

Then there's one that Josiah took of us just a few months ago at the studio house. I had y/n on the kitchen counter, she was in these jean shorts that I loved her in and a button up that she'd stolen from my suitcase. Not that I was complaining. It looked far better on her than it did on me. I stood between her legs, my hands on her sides, slipping under the shirt a little bit, leaning her hips exposed. Not that either of u cared with her fingers threaded in my hair as casually as they were. My face is blocked by her figure, but there isn't a doubt in my mind that I was smiling entirely too wide standing between her legs.

The video that follows knocks the breath out of me. She giggling like crazy, but the camera isn't on her, it's on me. On my back, more specifically. She laughs even more when I wince at the feel of her fingers on my red, raw skin that is now home of her fingernail scratches.

"Baby? What happened to your back?" She asked, amused.

"Don't know," I said, turning to face her, my cheeks still holding a slight blush. "But I think the real question is, what happened to your neck, missy?" I pluck the phone from her hands and turn the camera to her where she's trying to cover her face. I manage, however, to take her hands in my free one and the camera focuses on the flourishing bruises that litter her beautiful neck, my favorite place to rest my head.

I close my eyes, the memory of that night filling my mind. Watching her come down from her high, my face still buried between her legs. The weight and cold touch of her hands as she pulled me up to her, into her, because she needed me closer. I can hear myself murmuring the words 'I love you' all over her skin, still remember the way her back arched when I hit the right spot again and again and her finger ran down my back over and over, once more and she probably would have drawn blood. And I may not be home, but I can smell her on the sheets, that constant aroma of warm vanilla penetrating my nostrils. God, do I miss her.

I'm only making it worse for myself by doing this, I know that. But I should feel bad. I lost the greatest thing in my life and I didn't need to. So I got back to our messages, but instead of going to type a new one, I scroll through, reading through our old texts. There's countless paragraphs of us professing our love for each other. Lots of random pictures sent, most from my side. There's conversations about getting a home together, and a dog. And her telling me how much she loves my family and me telling her how much they love her, how much they ask about her. It's all hitting me too hard right now.

And it doesn't help that im literally sobbing at 2 in the morning, in Paris. The city of love. The place she told me was her favorite trip to ever take with me. Where we stood atop the eiffle tower and I gave her a promise ring, a ring that said I would love her and keep her forever. A promise ring that was now probably in the ocean in Cabo because I tore us apart so easily.

I sit up suddenly, struggling to catch my breath. It takes a few minutes, but I'm able to pull myself out of this empty bed that would only be comfortable with y/n laying next to me. I'm scrambling through the room, picking up the pair of jeans I threw off my body earlier and slipping back into them. I find a torn work out shirt in the bottom of my back and push my head and arms through before throwing my youth hoodie over my already overheated upper body. My passport is sitting in my guitar case, and I grab both things without a second thought. My suitcase trailing behind me.

It's difficult booking a flight and carrying a suitcase and guitar all at once, but I get along just well enough and adjust myself in the lobby while I wait for a taxi. I don't text Andrew until I've made it to the airport and am in my seat on the plane, ready for take off.

Emergency... had to fly home. Promise to make it back in time for the Paris show.

And I turn my phone off before he can text or call me back. Because there isn't a damn thing that he could say that would keep me there in a city that's meant for lovers, when my lover is across the world instead of laying in my arms the way she should be.

I know I shouldn't be doing this. I know there is someone out there who is better for her. Someone who isn't constantly on the move. Someone who can come home to her every night and help her make dinner. Someone who can cuddle her until she falls asleep when she's having a particularly bad day. I know there's someone who can do those things.

But I also know that he won't love her the way I do. He won't know all the little things that I do. Like how she only uses a blue toothbrush. Always has. And he won't notice the tiny scar that she has on her right middle finger from when we tried to make dinner together one night and she cut herself. He probably won't know that she wakes up at 3:34 every single night, because she hasn't been able to sleep fully and soundly through the night since she was four years old. And he'll mess up the way she likes her tea, using tea bags instead of leaves. (She like the herbal taste that you get when you use the leaves. And she likes when you do two scoops of them, and two scoops of sugar, but just cane sugar, the rock sugar makes it too earthy. And of course, she drinks it on ice because she hates burning her tongue with hot drinks.)

I'm thinking way too much as I get off the plane, reluctantly turning my phone back on only to see texts from just about everyone I know. They're all asking where I am, but I ignore them, because what I'm about to do is far more important than anything they threaten me with. I have to make things right.

Standing in front of this door that I've stood in front of hundreds of times should make me feel at ease. Remembering all the times I had her pressed against the other side of the door because I just couldn't wait to have her all to myself. But if anything, it's making me more nervous. So nervous that my hands are shaking, palms sweating, my breathing is jagged and I know if I don't knock right now I might never get the chance again and I can't lose her for real this time. So without giving myself the chance to rethink, I knock on the door three times and I wait, handing in the pocket of my hoodie.

I wait a solid thirty seconds, which feel like an eternity, before the door finally opens and I see my beautiful girl. Her face is bare, hair only halfway straightened, and she's in those shorts I love and my old Led Zepplin t-shirt.

"Shawn," my name still sounds like heaven spilling from her lips. "What are you doing here?" She crosses and then uncrosses her arms, shifting her weight from one leg to the other before standing completely straight.

I didn't even realize I was crying until I sniffled and heard my voice crack with just three words, "I miss you."

"Shawn," she shook her head.

"I tried not to," I insisted, still standing like a fool on her door step. "I swear I did. But I couldn't stop. I looked through all our pictures and texts, and I couldn't stop myself from missing you. And I know I have no right to because I broke things off. But I was in Paris and I was miserable because Paris was your favorite place, and that was where I promised to love you forever, and I'm still keeping that promise. I was an idiot," I continue to ramble. "If there's a better word for that, then I'm that too, because I thought it would be easier if I broke things off. This tour was going to be so long and to go that long without each other, I was scared that it wouldn't be enough for you. But it's not what I wanted, y/n. It's not, and I just-"

"Shawn, stop."

I shut my mouth instantly, ready for her to tell me to leave. But what she does instead throws me completely off guard. She pulls me into the apartment and wraps her arms around my neck, burying her head deep in my chest.

"I miss you, too." She mumbles and I exhale slowly, only to inhale that scent that I love so much. The scent that is naturally her. She starts to pull away, and even though I don't want her to, I let her but she only leans back enough to take my face in her hands and before I even have time to blink, her soft lips are on mine and I'm whole again.

She's mine again and I'm never letting her go.

***

Tags: @curlyshawny @shawns-badreputation @anamariel2301 @bbellbagel

This took me longer to write than it should have, but I kinda really like it. I hope you enjoyed and I'll see you Wednesday for more content! 💙

Like, reblog, and leave feedback!!

[mychemicalficrecs]

lookin for any ship (no w*ycest oh god) but for it to be a historic / not modern au! ive read quite a few of the popular ferard ones, but I cant find them anymore so feel free to include those. longer ones would be preferable, and i dont mind if they include other things like vampires or like.. pirates or somethin. thank u so much!!!!

Hi Nonny!

First things first: This is a blog for all ships. I'll answer your ask this time, but from now on asks that hate on a ship will be deleted. It's perfectly fine to dislike a ship and want it excluded from a list you're requesting, but you can be neutral about it.

With that out of the way: This Frank/Gerard Historical AUs list might be interesting to you as well!

Historical AUs (Misc. Ship Edition)

Bury Me In Memory by Acadjonne, Ray/Gerard, 27k, Teen And Up Audiences. Since losing his wife, Ray has done everything he could to raise his daughter Grace on his own. His brother-in-law Gideon, however, somehow always finds ways to complain about Ray and his parenting abilities. Despite this, Ray is determined not to let Gideon get the best of him. A chance meeting with author Gerard Way may change things, however, as the two soon begin to develop an attachment to each other, though neither does anything about it. Gerard is too preoccupied with making a grand statement about it, and Ray is too afraid of how it might affect Grace if Gideon were ever to find out. One misplaced paper, however, may be the unraveling of an important and well kept secret; one which could bring Ray’s entire life crashing down around him.

If I Fall by GALEXY, Frank/Gerard, Frank/Jamia, Lindsey/Gerard, Christa/Ray, Kristin/Mikey, 25k, Mature. “Jersey boys, huh?” The officer looked the five of them over before jerking his chin towards a table near the entry way. “Go on.” As they walked away, the blonde one—they later came to know him as Bob—sighed and muttered “I’m from Chicago” under his breath.

Gunpowder and Lead by prophetic, Frank/Gerard, Lindsey/Frank/Gerard, 53k, Teen And Up Audiences. Frank and Gerard made it through their first cattle drive together, but now Frank is gone and Gerard doesn’t know what to do. His gut tells him Frank’s disappearance has something to do with the preacher man. Turns out, Lindsey is looking for the preacher man too, but she won’t say why. Gerard has reasons enough to hate the man, but Lindsey has more—reasons that stretch back into her family, her childhood, and what brought her out west in the first place. She wants what he owes her—she wants revenge. American Western, set in the 1880s.

In Firmer Chains, Our Hearts Confine by doctorkilljoy, Grant/Gerard, 37k, Explicit. Former musical composer and current writer Gerard Way is a sensation of the musical and literary scenes of 1800s London. But after struggling for ages with his new book, he’s close to giving up. Until he receives an offer from Grant Morrison himself; to go to his manor in Scotland and work on his novel in peace. Gerard seizes upon the chance immediately. Grant, however, has a dark secret he’s desperately trying to keep hidden. And Gerard has a few of his own.

GHOST OF YOU by wentz, Mikey/Pete, 13k, Mature. he spends a lot of time thinking about gaps... gaps in time, gaps in space. the gap between the hem of mikey’s t-shirt and the waistband of his pants when he stretches his arms over his head. gaps in teeth, gaps in narratives. gaps of silence between gunshots. mostly he thinks about the wide, wide gap of the atlantic ocean and the war waiting on the other side.

Lead Me Home by wordslinging, Frank/Gerard, Grant/Gerard, Frank/Grant/Gerard, 34k, Explicit. When Grant finds an unconscious young man on the edge of his country estate, he takes him in and nurses him through the fever that develops, only to find when the fever breaks that his guest has completely lost his memories. With only a first name--Gerard--and evidence that he's escaped from some sort of danger, Grant and Gerard begin a search for his identity, all the while finding themselves drawn closer to each other. When they make contact with Gerard's family--including his father's ward, a young man named Frank--their situation becomes even more complicated.

amnesiaverse by fleurdeliser, tuesdaysgone, Frank/Gerard, Frank/Grant, Frank/Grant/Gerard, 45k, Explicit. Written for prompt number five of the yobrothatssick challenge: One foggy, wet afternoon, a mysterious young man collapses on the doorstep of Lord Morrison's manor. He does not remember his name or how he came to be there, but he does not seem that unfamiliar to Gerard, Lord Morrison's ward...

Below the Trees, Which Are Below the Stars by alpheratz, Frank/Mikey, Ray/Gerard, 38k, Explicit. In the mid-1920s, Gerard and Mikey moved to France - Gerard to pursue art, Mikey because he couldn't stay behind. Now, it's 1930, and Mikey's become an airmail pilot, flying the mail route to Dakar with his navigator Frank. For a long time, the only rough thing about Mikey's life was the strain on his and Gerard's soulbond when Mikey was away, but his growing feelings for Frank and the arrival of Frank's old friend Ray could change everything.

1930s Dragverse by wordslinging, Frank/Gerard, Grant/Gerard, 45k, Mature. It's the last year of Prohibition, and bootlegger Frank Iero wants to sever his ties to the world of organized crime and go straight, but his mob connections have other plans for him. No one would like to see Frank get away from the mob more than Gerard, but he's got problems of his own--like the fact that he's a cross-dressing cabaret singer constantly struggling to keep his true identity secret from those who can't be trusted. With the help of a devoted brother, a detective who just might be as trustworthy as he claims, and a wealthy, eccentric Scotsman who features prominently in Gerard's past, Frank and Gerard just might be able to get out and start a new life together, but it's not going to be easy. A tale of gangsters, garter belts, love (hopefully) overcoming all obstacles, and a whole lot of coffee.

in sickness and in health by mwestbelle, Bob/Jamia, Bob/Frank/Jamia, Frank/Jamia, 16k, Explicit. WWII AU in which Bob married his fallen comrade's wife out of duty, but Frank is not so fallen.

Fic: The End of the Beginning (PG-13) by tuesdaysgone, Lindsey/Gerard, Bob/Gerard, Lindsey/Alicia, Lindsey/Bob, Lindsey/Bob/Gerard, Alicia/Gerard, 15k, Teen And Up Audiences. Prompt #413 - post WWII fic where MCR are returned to the US in varying states of physical/mental hurt. Gee has his wife to go back to, but also has to face Alicia, and while he's managed to come to terms with Mikey's death with the help of his unit, he feels pretty guilty for letting Alicia's husband die. Lyn and Alica are strong women in the workforce (overalls and mechanics!). They all deal with their pain and trauma together. A billion bonus points if MCR made pacts to *look after* their wives if something happened to them, and Alicia refuses to be a charity case, and it all turns into 50s secret swinging GSF.

Fic: These Elegant Crimes (R) by tuesdaysgone, Frank/Gerard, Frank/Greta Salpeter, Frank/Greta Salpeter/Gerard, 33k, Mature. Gerard Way inherits a title and a seat in the House of Lords and decides to Save Lives Through Legislation. He also paints portraits, collects strays, and occasionally commits felonies in his spare time. A Victorian AU.

Undertow by silentdescant, Frank/Jamia, Lindsey/Gerard, 35k, Mature. Frank lost his ship, his crew, and his best friend in one violent storm. When he washes up on an island, he has to learn how start living again. Time passes, and he thinks he's settled down and moved on, but then he rescues a woman from the sea and in caring for her, realizes he hasn't fully recovered from his own shipwreck. Frank quickly comes to depend on her and though he starts to live again, he doesn't want to live without her. Vaguely-historical AU.

A Gentleman's Agreement by mahoni (orphan_account), Bob/Brian and other band ships, 56k, Explicit. Brian buys and sells unicorns and bicorns for the titled and wealthy. When Bob's stepfather defaults on a debt he owes Brian, he uses Bob as barter to pay the debt off. Brian and Bob agree that their arrangement will be a marriage on paper only, that Bob will run Brian's stables and the relationship will remain strictly professional. But despite Bob's trust issues and Brian's propensity for drinking a lot instead of dealing with how he feels, their mutual affection for Brian's horses breaks down the walls between them. With a little help from Brian's friends and his possessed house, they begin to fall in love.

[shikanaradai]

ShikaTema Week 2019 – Day 2: Midnight picnic

A/N: Due to being forced to pressured and from popular demands... I’ve decided to post this sad excuse of a fic... Be warned it’s not very “Midnight-picnic”-y cuz... I suck at fluff and writing... I didn’t proofread this because I’ll go “ctrl+a” and “delete” without a heartbeat... Enjoy my comeback fic ig...

---------- 

It’s safe to say Shikamaru and Temari don’t like going out on a public date, just snuggling up together in the comfort of their house is good enough for the two. They prefer displaying their affections away from the prying eyes to avoid the teasing, especially from a few blonde and maybe a certain pink haired. When they had their son, Shikadai, seeing the two going out was almost non-existent; despite inheriting the distinct Nara gene, extreme laziness, he was just as stubborn as his mother, and may Shikamaru add, a big mama’s boy – to which Shikadai will refuse profusely as he got older.

 The door to the master bedroom slid opened abruptly, surprising the man inside as he turned to the door and watched his wife dragged her feet to the futon next to him. She quickly crawled inside, not giving a care that the door to their room is wide open and that she hasn’t free her hair from their ties. He watched in amusement before standing up and closed the door in her stead and walked back, staring at the big bulge on her futon.

“I heard quite some fuss, what did he do tonight?” He raised his eyes, remembering the screaming just half an hour ago

“Wow, you heard him screaming and didn’t bother to come and help me?” She snarled and he can feel her death glares staring right through his body despite having a huge blanket over her “That son of yours won’t go to sleep… He’s not tired he said…” She grumbled and sat up, the blanket falling down “I thought he inherited that lazy Nara gene of yours, putting him to sleep has been nothing but troublesome lately” She complaint while her husband watched, trying to think up of a reply

“Don’t forget he is also your son… Guess your stubborn-“ He quickly stopped himself before getting himself killed “I mean…”

His wife watched and sighed, pulling off her ties and collapsed back to the pillow “I’m too tired to even fight back… My stubbornness is to blame I assume” She finished his sentence and Shikamaru turned to her

“I was going to say strong determination but I guess that could work” He grinned and quickly dodged a flying pillow to his face “Tem…”

“Shut it… I’m sleepy, talk to me tomorrow” Temari ignored him and quickly turned her back to him and Shikamaru let out a soft chuckle

“What? I find it unfair that you give your attention to your son way more than to your husband” He pretended to sound hurt but he obviously failed when he heard a scoff as a reply

“Puh-lease. You got all my attention when we were dating and even when we just got married”

“Tem… That was 3 years ago” Shikamaru crawled over and sat right behind her, staring at her back “Ever since Dai was born, we haven’t had a date yet”

“Now you’re being a romantic?” She turned to him, raising her eyes “You do know the main reason you’re even barely home is because of your mission, right? Then you got your job with the Hokage, you’re blaming Dai?”

“Don’t be so troublesome…” Shikamaru scratched his head “Look… I was thinking of spending some time alone… Just you and me” He looked at her, her teal eyes shone brightly under the moonlight

“What about Dai?”

“Kaa-chan is willing to look after him. She called me saying how much she missed him” Shikamaru quickly explained “And of course, she’s quite willing to take him on Tuesday…”

“Why Tuesday of all days?”

“And here I always got sent to Suna for forgetting our anniversary…” Shikamaru chuckled softly and leaned in towards her, his head inches away from hers and she can feel her cheeks heat up; it has been ages since his face was this close to her “Oi, I can see you turning into a tomato despite being in such a dark room” He teased and quickly grabbed onto her wrist, stopping them before she punched him away “I didn’t say it was a bad thing, did I?”

“You’re being too sappy all of the sudden… I must be very tired” She grumbled, trying to hide her blush and Shikamaru chuckled

“Tem… Just let me finish my request, please” Shikamaru reached for her hand, intertwining their fingers together and Temari quickly flinched at the gesture

“O-Oi…”

“When Dai is with his grandmother, how about we grab a bite to eat?” He looked straight onto her eyes and Temari blinked. Shikamaru looked at her nervously but then saw her lips turning into a grin

“Might as well” She flashed him her distinct smile, the smile that let him see the light when he was in the dark, the smile that is reserved just for him and his son, the smile that had stolen his heart all those years ago.

  “Mama!” The cry of their toddler son echoed the house while his grandmother struggled to hold him back, his parents watched in pain, heartbroken to see their son so upset.

“Shikadai, your parents will only be away for a bit, they’ll return soon” Yoshino tried to calm her grandson down but it’s very obvious that she’s failing miserably, seeing how Shikadai’s still screaming in tears while his hands frantically reached for his mother.

“No! Dai wants mama!” He screamed louder and Shikamaru shook his head from behind

Definitely Temari’s son… He sighed and quickly got elbowed on his hip, teal eyes glaring from his wife

“Dai… Listen to me carefully, hm?” Temari kneeled down as Shikadai clutched onto her kimono tightly, burying his face on her shoulder “Be a good boy and listen to your grandmother, ok? I’ll be back real soon!” She cooed him, her voice soft and gentle, the side that appeared after his, no, their son was born; the side of Temari that Shikamaru grew to love, adding onto the list of other endless things of why he loves Temari with all his being.

“W-Where mama and papa go?” Shikadai sniffled and leaned back, his small baby teal eyes stared straight at his mother’s

“Just nearby, we’ll be quick” Shikamaru kneeled down beside his wife and wiped the tears lingering on Shikadai’s cheeks with his thumb “Be a good boy alright, little fawn? You can do that right?” He grinned and Shikadai nodded reluctantly

“Okaa-san, I really thank you for this” Temari bowed to her mother-in-law, earning a chuckled and a pat from her

“Oh, I want to spend some time with Shikadai anyway” She waved her hand in front of her, motioning that Temari doesn’t need to worry much “You two enjoy your date, take as long as you want” She grinned and Shikamaru rolled his eyes

“We’ll get going then…” Shikamaru mumbled and Temari nodded, they bid farewell to Yoshino and Shikadai before heading off, a picnic basket in Shikamaru’s hand.

“Ah… To be young and in love… Let’s hope for a younger sibling soon hm, Shikadai?” She laughed while closing the door and Shikadai walked inside, still taking glances at his parents’ backs disappearing into the horizon.

  The young couple enjoyed a silent walk, just like they used to have when she was working as the Konoha-Suna ambassador with him being her guide. Nearly a decade had passed and nothing changed much since then when they walked down the street, enjoying each other’s company and the silence, well, aside from the fact that they’re now husband and wife instead of mere colleagues. Truth to be told, Temari was kind of expecting a fancy dinner in some weird fancy restaurant and maybe have them holding hand in hand down the street, but seeing Shikamaru’s nervous face with a picnic basket in hand confused her. He wanted a date with her, he yearned for her attention and affections, so why did he tell her not to dress fancy and locked her out of the kitchen for the whole day?

“Close your eyes” Shikamaru brought her back to reality and she wasn’t even listening. She blinked a few times and turned to him, trying to recollect what he just said “Don’t tell me you’re deaf?” He raised his eyes, silently, and trying to be subtle, on judging her expressions. He shook his head in disbelief at his wife’s cluelessness, heck, he kind of finds it cute when she’s just spacing out like that. “Close your eyes” He repeated and quickly grabbed an eye mask, putting it on her

“O-Oi! What are you trying to do?” She asked, taken by surprise how he just blocked her ability to see just like that “Oi Shikamaru!” She called out for him, her arms swinging around on trying to find her husband. He got to admit; she doesn’t seem so intimidating looking like this. It’s not every day you see Sabaku no Temari, pretty much the princess of Suna acting like a lost child. “I swear to god Shikamaru, if you don’t-“ She began to complain but quickly stopped when her legs were lifted up and she could feel two pair of strong arms carrying her, the action earned a small yelp from the kunoichi

“It’s a surprise” She could hear the cheekiness in his tone as she let Shikamaru carry her to god knows where. She lost sense of direction, lost her sense of sight but she can tell from the sound of his feet landing on tiles, that Shikamaru is running on top of roofs. After what felt like hours, which was merely 5 minutes, Shikamaru set her down and took off her blindfold, surprising her with Konoha’s night view from on top of a hill. She stared at the scenery in awe, taking in the beauty of the night sky and the lights down in the village now she calls home, heck, why the hell have she never been here before?

“You like it?” Shikamaru grinned, feeling proud judging on her reaction “I’ve been meaning to show you this place but with Shikadai being all over you, it was quite impossible” He chuckled, walking up to her “It’s bea-“

“Why the hell didn’t you show me this place sooner, Nara?” Temari growled, slapping onto his arm “I’ve been living here for 4 years already and never knew of this place until now?”

“Oi, is this how you’re going to repay for all the troubles I had to go through?” Shikamaru groaned, rubbing his arm and Temari turned around, noticing a picnic set up behind her, bottle of wine, two wine glasses and some food lying on the mat, waiting for her

“So… A picnic in the middle of the night?” She raised her eyes, looking at Shikamaru “You really went through all this trouble just for this?”

“Wow, you’re very much welcome” Shikamaru replied in a mocking tone “I totally didn’t cut my hand a few times making these stuff”

“You what?” She darted to his hand, quickly reaching for it and Shikamaru pulled back

“Oi, I was joking. You really think I’m that bad at cooking?”

“I wouldn’t say bad… but I guess?” She gave him a small shrug and Shikamaru rolled his eyes before grabbing onto her hand, caressing them carefully

“Nara Temari…” He began, making her heart jumped at the sudden mention, the name she can still not get used to “I have to thank you for being able to keep up with my troublesome self while still being able to take care of our son” He continued, his eyes staring straight at hers, his emotions reaching to the very core of her body “And I can’t thank you enough for marrying me…”

“Someone’s being awfully romantic” Temari mumbled but quickly smiled “Not that I don’t mind…” She chuckled, moving closer to him “Only I can take care of your lazy bum now, can I?” She grinned “And your troublesome son”

“Our son” He corrected her and pulled her into a hug “Thank you, Tem…” He mumbled quietly but still loud enough for her to hear.

  It’s already well past midnight and the sight of the two heads of the Nara clan is nowhere to be seen. They said they were going for a walk inside the Nara clan forest but that was 3 hours ago and now, the newly made genin is walking down the forest, in search for the two leaders. Saying they’re only going for a walk but with a huge picnic basket in hand, yeah sure, a walk. Going down on a familiar path, he entered a clearing where you can see the starry sky with nothing blocking your views, no trees, no hills, no houses. Scanning the area quickly led him to land his eyes on two shadows, casually laying down on top of the mat, very much relaxed

“Asleep…” He quickly concluded judging by the closeness of the two and seeing how the basket is empty with no food left, the bottle of wine very much empty. He walked over to his target, staring at his parents very much asleep under the night sky, too close for his liking but he can’t complain “What a drag… If you two are going on a date, you should at least said so” He shook his head and pulled out a blanket, putting over them “I know you two hate showing affections in front of me but I’d rather gag from disgust than being worried for you two” He continued to voice his complaint to his unconscious parents. “That blanket won’t let you survive the night so you two better stay warm…” He picked up the empty picnic basket and set the trash inside it. He stood up straight and took a last glance at his parents, a small smile forming on his face and he chuckled, shaking his head “Happy anniversary oyaji, kaa-chan…” He smiled, walking away, letting his parents enjoy some rare moment together, under Konoha’s beautiful starry night. 

[patriotsnet]

Did Trump Say Republicans Were Dumb

New Post has been published on https://www.patriotsnet.com/did-trump-say-republicans-were-dumb/

Did Trump Say Republicans Were Dumb

Ben Carson: March 4 2016

Donald Trump Tells Oprah in 1988 What He Would Do as President

You would be forgiven for forgetting that at one point last fall, Dr. Ben Carson was tied with Trump for first place in national Republican presidential preference polls. They were two different versions of the “outsider” candidate Trump, the brash billionaire and reality TV star; and Carson the quiet doctor propelled by faith. ;In;November, Trump went on the attack. He turned to Carson’s own autobiography for ammunition, noting with skepticism Carson’s story of how his religious conversion began when he attempted to stab a friend only to have the knife blade break on the friend’s belt buckle. “How stupid are the people of Iowa?” Trump asked. “How stupid are the people of the country to believe this crap?” At the time it seemed a direct challenge to evangelicals that could only hurt Trump, but it was Carson who began to slip in the polls. The doctor did poorly in the early primaries and dropped out after Super Tuesday. A week later he endorsed Trump, saying the two had “buried the hatchet” and that he believed there are “two Donald Trumps” the bombastic public figure and the private man who is “cerebral” and willing to consider other views.

Trump Secretly Mocks His Christian Supporters

Former aides say that in private, the president has spoken with cynicism and contempt about believers.

One day in 2015, Donald Trump beckoned Michael Cohen, his longtime confidant and personal attorney, into his office. Trump was brandishing a printout of an article about an Atlanta-based megachurch pastor trying to raise $60 million from his flock to buy a private jet. Trump knew the preacher personallyCreflo Dollar had been among a group of evangelical figures who visited him in 2011 while he was first exploring a presidential bid. During the meeting, Trump had reverently bowed his head in prayer while the pastors laid hands on him. Now he was gleefully reciting the impious details of Dollars quest for a Gulfstream G650.

Trump seemed delighted by the scam, Cohen recalled to me, and eager to highlight that the pastor was full of shit. Theyre all hustlers, Trump said.

The presidents alliance with religious conservatives has long been premised on the contention that he takes them seriously, while Democrats hold them in disdain. In speeches and interviews, Trump routinely lavishes praise on conservative Christians, casting himself as their champion. My administration will never stop fighting for Americans of faith, he declared at a rally for evangelicals earlier this year. Its a message his campaign will seek to amplify in the coming weeks as Republicans work to confirm Amy Coney Barretta devout, conservative Catholicto the Supreme Court.

So If None Of This Counts What’s The Point

According to those conducting the recount, the purpose of this project is to address a prevailing concern among some voters that the 2020 election was illegitimate. And if the final result is that there was no fraud? That’s fine, too.

“This is not about calling into question the results of the November election,” Ken Bennett, spokesman for the audit, told the Washington Post. “This is about identifying if there are any areas of our elections that need to be improved going forward.”

Few Democrats believe this, of course. They fear that the point of the audit is to simply sow further doubt about Biden’s victory – and pave the way for Republican state-level efforts to enact new voting restrictions that disadvantage their candidates and voters in the name of “ballot security”.

Also Check: What Is Difference Between Democrats And Republicans

Trump Slashes At Mcconnell As He Reiterates Election Falsehoods At Republican Event

Former president Donald Trump called Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell a dumb son of a bitch as he used a Saturday night speech to Republicans to blame the senator for not helping overturn the 2020 election and reiterated false assertions that he won the November contest.

Trump, speaking at a Republican National Committee gathering at his Mar-a-Lago Club in Palm Beach, Fla., excoriated a number of Republicans even as he publicly called for party unity focusing on those who voted to convict him in impeachment proceedings. But he saved his sharpest vitriol for the Kentucky Republican.

If that were Schumer instead of this dumb son of a bitch Mitch McConnell, they would never allow it to happen. They would have fought it, he said of the election certification on Jan. 6, the day his supporters led an insurrection on the Capitol to block President Bidens formal victory.

Trump spent much of the speech, with many senators in the room, lashing into his former ally in personal terms, often to cheers from the partys top donors. He falsely claimed that he won the Senate election for McConnell in Kentucky and attacked his wife, Elaine Chao, who served as Trumps transportation secretary.

I hired his wife. Did he ever say thank you? Trump said. He then mocked Chao for resigning in response to the Jan. 6 events and Trumps behavior that day.

Some attendees left the private event early, with the speech getting mixed reviews.

Bette Midler Apologizes For Sharing Fake Trump Quote: But It Sounds So Much Like Him

Singer/actress refuses to take down the fictitious meme after her apology

Bette Midler apologized on Monday after posting a fake quote attributed to Donald Trump where he purportedly disparaged Republican voters in a 1998 People Magazine interview.

I apologize; this quote turns out to be a fake from way back in 15-16. Dont know how I missed it, but it sounds SO much like him that I believed it was true!, the singer/actress

I apologize; this quote turns out to be a fake from way back in 15-16. Dont know how I missed it, but it sounds SO much like him that I believed it was true! Fact Check: Did Trump say in 98 Republicans are dumb? via

Bette Midler

In addition to her apology, Midler also included a link to the Reno Gazette Journal debunking the quote. It read, If I were to run, Id run as a Republican. Theyre the dumbest group of voters in the country. They believe anything on Fox News. I could lie and theyd still eat it up. I bet my numbers would be terrific.

The photo accompanying the quote shows a younger Trump around the time he was a real estate developer in New York City and long before he became a political candidate.

Dumb and Dumber @GOP, he said in a tweet before deleting. Narisetti is also an alum of the Wall Street Journal, Washington Post and News Corp.

The memes providence dates back to at least 2015 when Snopes, a liberal-leaning fact-checking website, fact-checked the quote and proved it was false.

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Wait A Minute Bamboo Fibre

Yes. According to one volunteer, John Brakey, they’re investigating whether fake ballots may have been snuck in from overseas.

“They use bamboo in their paper processing, people in southeast Asia,” he told a local CBS television station.

Brakey is quick to say he doubts such fraud is real, but the investigators apparently want to leave no stone unturned, untested and unsubjected to ultraviolet light.

As mail-in Arizona ballots are matched against registered voters, multiple votes cast by the same individual would have been flagged.

Donald Trump’s Most Controversial Quotes

On America:

GETTY

Guns

He also praised the National Rifle Association and Second Amendment, describing his sons as serious NRA. His praise of the Second Amendment comes just days after an Uber driver went on a deadly shooting spree in Michigan, killing killed six people.

I want to begin by thanking my boys, Eric has been all over the place making speeches. Hes getting better than me so Im a little jealous. And Don went to , you were all over, right?

He loves the rifle stuff. This is serious rifle. This is serious NRA, both of them, both of them. We love the Second Amendment folks, nobody loves it more than us, so just remember that.

Guantanamo

Trump is promising to keep the controversial detention camp open after President Obama’s repeated pledges to close it, something he reiterated in his victory speech.

Were going to keep as you know Gitmo, were keeping that open, and were going to load it up with bad dudes. Were going to load it up w a lot of bad dudes out there.

Walls

Finally, he repeated his most familiar campaign promise: to build that big beautiful wall, and make Mexico pay for it.

Were going to have our borders nice and strong. Were going to build the wall, you know that. Were going to build the wall. And I have a lot of respect from Mexico and you just heard we won Hispanics. But let me tell you Mexico is going to pay for the wall, right? Its going to happen.

Recommended Reading: Who Has More Billionaires Democrats Or Republicans

Jeb Bush: Feb 20 2016

A year ago, Jeb Bush was at the forefront of an historic fundraising juggernaut, with a super PAC that raised more than $100 million by June. But Bush could never generate the passion and enthusiasm of Trump. The billionaire branded Bush a “low energy” candidate;and proceeded to tie George W. Bush’s invasion of Iraq around Jeb Bush’s neck like a lead weight. During a , Trump said President Bush had lied about the pretext for the Iraq War.;Jeb rose to his brother’s defense. ;”While Donald Trump was building a reality TV show, my brother was building a security apparatus to keep us safe and Im proud of what he did,” he said. But Trump fired back: “The World Trade Center came down during your brother’s reign, remember that. That’s not keeping us safe.” A;week later Trump won the winner-take-all Palmetto State primary and Bush dropped out of the race.

Tale Of The Tape: The 16 Contenders Trump Has Knocked Out

Oprah asks a 42-year-old Trump if he’d run for president

Donald Trump clobbered his opponents in Indiana, knocking out Texas Sen. Ted Cruz ;and;Ohio Gov. John Kasich. Cruz whom Trump labeled “Lyin’ Ted” acknowledged Tuesday that he had no path left to the nomination and suspended his campaign, and;Kasich threw in the towel;Wednesday. Even RNC Chairman Reince Priebus has called the fight for Trump, declaring the billionaire the presumptive nominee.

Heres how Trump has dispatched the contenders who stepped into the ring with him during this years presidential contest:

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Jeb’s Campaign Releases Video Of ‘the Real Donald Trump’

Jeb Bush’s campaign is ratcheting up its attacks on Donald Trump, releasing a video that paints the Republican presidential candidate as an unabashed liberal. And Trump is firing right back.

The spot, titled “The Real Donald Trump,” plays on two separate occasions a clip of the billionaire candidate saying that he “lived in New York and Manhattan my whole life” and that “my views are a little bit different than if I had lived in Iowa.”

“Liberal Things That Trump Says,” the text on screen reads before flipping to “Liberal Things That Trump Believes.” Trump has made a point of embracing his eclectic policy views in the past, something that Bush’s campaign is seizing upon in the latest spot.

Trump is shown in a 1999 “Meet the Press” interview telling Tim Russert that he is “very pro-choice,” though a dozen years later, Trump announced that he opposed abortion in most instances, except in cases of rape, incest or to protect the health of the mother.

The spot also highlights Trump’s praise of single-payer health care systems in Canada and in Scotland during last month’s GOP debate, though it does not include his qualifying statement that although he thought it was a good idea for the U.S. in the late 1990s, he does not believe that to now be the case.

Im Getting The Word Out: Inside The Feverish Mind Of Donald Trump Two Months After Leaving The White House

I Alone Can Fix It

To revist this article, visit My Profile, then View saved stories.

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To revist this article, visit My Profile, then View saved stories.

Seventy days had passed since Donald Trump left Washington against his will. On March 31, 2021, we ventured to Mar-a-Lago, where he still reigned as king of Republican politics. We arrived late that afternoon for our audience with the man who used to be president and were ushered into an ornate sixty-foot-long room that functioned as a kind of lobby leading to the clubs patio. A model of Air Force One painted in Trumps proposed redesigna flat red stripe across the middle, a navy belly, a white top, and a giant American flag on the tailwas proudly displayed on the coffee table facing the entrance. It was a prop disconnected from reality.; Trumps vision never came to be; the fleet now in use by President Biden still bears the iconic baby blue-and-white livery designed by Jacqueline Kennedy.

Trump had invited us to Mar-a-Lago to interview him for this book. He had declined an interview for our first book about his presidency, and when A Very Stable Genius was published in January 2020, attacked us personally and branded our reporting a work of fiction. But Trump was quick to agree to our request this time. He sought to curate history.

But future elections were not front and center in his mind. A past election was. Trump was fixated on his loss in 2020, returning to this wound repeatedly throughout the interview.;

Also Check: How Do Republicans Feel About Climate Change

Wisconsin Gop Wrestles With Just How Much To Indulge Trump

The former president set off infighting among state Republicans by saying they were not working hard enough to challenge the 2020 results, accusing them of covering up election corruption.

By Reid J. Epstein

Wisconsin Republicans were already going to great lengths to challenge the 2020 election results. They ordered a monthslong government audit of votes in the state. They made a pilgrimage to Arizona to observe the G.O.P. review of votes there. They hired former police officers to investigate Wisconsins election and its results.

But for Donald J. Trump, it wasnt enough.

In a blistering statement last week on the eve of the state partys convention, the former president accused top Republican state lawmakers of working hard to cover up election corruption and actively trying to prevent a Forensic Audit of the election results.

Wisconsin Republicans were alarmed and confused. Some circulated a resolution at the convention calling for the resignation of the top Republican in the State Assembly, Speaker Robin Vos, who in turn announced the appointment of a hard-line conservative former State Supreme Court justice to oversee the investigation. The Republican State Senate president released a two-page letter addressed to Mr. Trump that said his claims about Republicans were false but that made sure to clarify in fawning language the state partys allegiance to the former president.

Fact Check: Trump Did Not Call Republicans The Dumbest Group Of Voters

5 Min Read

An old quote falsely attributed to Donald Trump has recently resurfaced online. The viral meme alleges Trump told People magazine in 1998 that Republicans are the dumbest group of voters in the country. This is false.

While the quote has been debunked several times since it apparently surfaced in 2015, users have recently been resharing it on social media. Examples can be seen here , here , here , here

The meme reads: If I were to run, Id run as a Republican. Theyre the dumbest group of voters in the country. They believe anything on Fox News. I could lie and theyd still eat it up. I bet my numbers would be terrific. – Donald Trump, People Magazine, 1998

Snopes first wrote about the false quote here in October 2015 . Since then, the quote has been debunked multiple times .

People magazine has confirmed in the past that its archive has no register of this alleged exchange.

People looked into this exhaustively when it first surfaced back in Oct. . We combed through every Trump story in our archive. We couldnt find anything remotely like this quoteand no interview at all in 1998., a magazine spokesperson told Factcheck.org that year .

In December 1987, People published a profile on Donald Trump titled Too Darn Rich. The article quoted him saying he was too busy to run for president .

Read Also: How Many Registered Republicans In Texas

Donald Trump Quotes That Should Horrify His Evangelical Supporters

After months of campaigning, flip-flopping on important issues,;and generally wreaking havoc on the party that for decades has presented itself as defenders of Christian America, Donald Trump took to the stage at the Republican National Convention and thanked the evangelicals who helped him get there.

At this moment, I would like to thank the evangelical and religious community because Ill tell you what. Because the support theyve given me, and Im not sure I totally deserve it, has been so amazing. And has had such a big reason for me being here tonight. True. So true.

So true, its cringeworthy.

White evangelical Protestants are a considerable force in the elections making up one-fifth of all registered voters.;While a number of evangelical leaders have pointed out that Trumps policies and actions are decidedly un-Christian, rank-and-file white evangelical Americans have in fact thrown their support behind the candidate. According to the Pew Research Center, 78 percent of white evangelical voters;say they would vote for Trump if the election were held today.;

But if you place Trumps quotes, principles and policies next to the ideals set forth by Christianitys founder, the gap is startling. Trump has little regard for some of the fundamental teachings of Jesus Christ showing love for your neighbor, welcoming the stranger, and asking for Gods forgiveness.;

[taonsil]

end of year fic summary \o/

this is copied over from dw so isn’t a tagging thing, but please do take it if you want~ it was in shareable format originally.

dhjfd I set my w/c goal at half of what my actual output was last year because I hoped to do more art, I didn’t realise it was gonna be because of the block from hell. but! the last minute burst of enthusiasm at the end of the year got me there, just makes for a pretty repetitive summary orz

january: - february: autochoris yeol, chansoo drabble march: april: may: june: round trip july: watch the time cause no one's watchin' august: september: october: suyeol drabble november: sparkle dust, unbeleafable december: useless husbands wip!

total number of fics (edited and reuploaded drabbles included): 7

total word count: 61k

favorite: gonna have a lot of same-y answers this year as there's less to pick from OTL but favourite, definitely unbeleafable. I really had a love-hate relationship with creating it, but I'm so pleased with the final result. It's a 'verse I'd happily have continued writing if there hadn't been a deadline

the best: unbeleafable. maybe it was due to lack of practice or coming out the other side of a massive writers block, but my style changed a little and I think it really benefited this fic! but also it was my first real attempt at writing explicitly nd characters and a plot that revolved around those themes. I'm the first to hold my hands up to my first attempts at other subjects having been clumsy, so I feel like I spent months just tweaking and editing it;; I really bonded with the characters in this (and the sideplots/supporting characters) n, yeah, it's just something I'm really proud of

most underappreciated by the universe: round trip! it's probably the only true gen fic I've ever written, and pokemon au. I found it very fun and cutesy to work on and (again, probably bc of the block that was getting me down most of the year) I was pretty happy with how the details worked into it. it's not super interesting, but I did hope it would be enjoyed ;u;

most fun to write: sparkle dust and unbeleafable. sparkle dust was ripped from a draft I created around march, and it was awful. it was when I could barely string a sentence together. it got real fun rewriting it once I felt back on my feet and feeling more confident of the direction it was going in, and that it's on a subject I enjoy, as well as knowing it was a gift for cat :'D unbeleafable was much the same - I started it in may, dusted it off in october and basically rewrote the entire thing at a personal best speed once I felt connected to it and comfortable with how the writing was going (and I enjoyed adding in little details so much, I was honestly laughing like a loser at some scenes while I was working on them). also the gross husbands wip I’m working on rn, it’s 6k in and I’m enjoying it a lotttt

sexiest: I mean..it's sparkle dust bc its the only one with actual sex in lol (if it could go to a character it would be tao in watch the time though, before he knows that yeol isn't up for anything his dialogue and actions are pretty sexual). and the wip but I can’t really talk about it cause it’s not up yet D:

“holy crap that’s wrong even for you”: everything was just standard Me this year imo.. it's not /wrong/ in any way, but writing an explicitly autochoris fic was pushing my own boundaries wrt comfort writing a subject. I mean I guess a sloppy blowjob wasn’t very Me but

fic that shifted my own perception of the characters: unbeleafable and watch the time. watch the time because that was also lifted from an old (2015) work, and writing the 'verse in more detail changed the character's attitudes. it's the first time I've written a tao who is so charming, mature and relationship driven, while cy is softer and more anxious (where as previously he was usually my filler character when I needed someone loud). and unbeleafable was just uh..honestly jm's depression was an afterthought. it wasn't in the original outline (which in fairness was only aiming for a 4k meet-cute, not the extensive slow burn it turned into). that his depression started to become detailed and was then a major plot point basically developed as I wrote, and I was backtracking to adjust earlier details to fit it. that jm really defined himself and I had to catch up;;

hardest to do: watch the time, god. I think I spent four months on it. I can't even words how terrible my block was this year, it really got me down. even when I was writing stuff that I can look back at now and see was ok, it was like I couldn't even tell if what I was reading made sense. it's the slowest I've ever worked on something and it was a really painful process, but I loved the idea of it so it felt like something good to work on when I was in a bad spot. (unbeleafable caught some of that too - I was poking around the same 5k of it for several months and considered dumping it so many times orz)

biggest disappointment: sparkle dust..a bit..bc I'm still terrible at smut lmao even with the context of the scene I just feel I could have done it better

most telling: I mean, everything. watch the time is chantao, ace themes, gender themes, (there's even a mention of tao's tattoo) it's a very very Me fic. a few people guessed unbeleafable was me. in a different sense that was telling, because I wanted yeol to be so loveable and worked hard to portray issues that matter to me in good lights

a thing I’m surprised at: that my w/c is as high as it is all considered djhf but no like, really the biggest surprise I've ever had in all my time writing fic was how positive the response to unbeleafable was. I was so genuinely shocked, I was even saving screenshots of some of the comments in case they were deleted or something. I still am surprised tbh.

what pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you never would have predicted in January? chantao and chansoo were probably the only thing I did expect tbh. pokemon au, subaek smut, suyeol..none of that was exactly what I anticipated, considering last year and previous was mostly focal around suchen and sutaohun

story with single sweetest moment? hnnn the lil chansoo drabble about yeol cutting his hair is overall entirely affection based. and there's two scenes in unbeleafable - when cy hugs jm after their sort-of-date and jm buries into it, and when cy offers jm his sleeve to hold while they're talking. (djhfd also this marrieds wip. they’re Very married, there’s a lot of gross husband-ing)

the story that made you cry: unbeleafable 🌿 the entire theme of it is personal to me, both yeol's autism and jm's depression. at times I was letting it write itself, and I got quite upset when they reached the point of being unsure if their communication issue would resolve. it was hard writing those scenes, because I absolutely couldn't change yeol's character to make it easier, but at the same time I really felt for how desperate and hurt jm was. (also in a nice-cry kinda way when they resolved things I was just, YES ; A;) (hmm also watch the time a lil bit when they had the confrontation and yeol was sure they’d have to break up)

easiest story to write: round trip was kind of a breakthrough wrt the block, after a lot of struggling it came pretty easy and got done in a day or two~

most overdue story: watch the time. I've wanted to write about sex repulsion for a long time but always skirted around it. also literally, seeing as it took me months longer to complete than intended :'D

did you take any writing risks this year? what did you learn from them? mmm kind of, in the subjects I chose. writing about an autochoris experience and writing a repulsed ace wasn't uncharacteristic for me but my confidence was very low at the time and I felt very uncomfortable about it. and unbeleafable honestly terrified me, I felt so vulnerable waiting for that to post and probably wouldn't have done it if it weren't for the fact it was anon initially. for me it felt like a big risk posting something that I felt could get a bad reception to an fest. I nearly contacted the mods at one point to ask them if it was even a good idea orz (also I feel my style just..changed somewhere, idk, but I decided to go with it instead of trying to change it back. its going ok ??)

in regards to writing, what did you learn this year: dghfd that blocks do end and that forcing yourself to produce has varied success. most importantly, I learned that sometimes bad things /dont/ happen :P

do you have any fanfic goals for the new year? I'm gradually working through my list! from last year I've achieved 4k+ averages for smaller fics and also writing 15k+ longer ones. and even managed something rated :P hmm idk though. I've always said 'more plot and a chaptered fic', but I wonder if I even want to do that anymore? it was more just something to tick off than a personal goal. I kinda would still like to write something plot driven but I'm accepting that my niche is what it is and it's probably what I'm best at/won't get bored doing. it feels like it's taken me until now to really decide and gain the confidence to write about the kind of people I want. so a very gentle goal for the new year would just be regaining my confidence, getting around to making that inspiration/techniques page I've always meant to have, continuing to polish up my style, and enjoying! writing!! again so I can get back to having fun !! upping suyeol’s page count also sweats

[grizzlefur]

WWEm - More Like PerestroiKO

Broadcast date: Monday 11/Tuesday 12 September 2017

Brought to you by the function 3x+6 and the cuneiform logogram DIĜIR, this is MONDAY AFTERNOON RAW!

(should have done this earlier, fell asleep, so sue me)

and we're starting with a moment of silence

christ, yeah, it's the 9/11 episode

fun and jokes on my blog today

oh, and a sombre text crawl

great

someone breaks the silence with a woo, usa chants begin

i get the feeling i'm gonna be sighing at america a lot tonight

oh hey, and apparently brock's gonna be here tonight

woooo

and cena/strowman, which should be fun

but for now, here comes the opposite of fun

in the form of roman reigns

oh, and apparently he's fighting jason

good way to get jj over as a face, i guess

he enters, the crowd goes tepid

recap of cena/jordan from last week

that was a good match

and video of the less-good smacktalk session following that match

so now roman gets to put his money where his shit is

if roman loses this, i just want cena to turn up and laugh for ten minutes straight

oh hey, pan out to cena watching the match

preliminary scuffling, punctuated by roman perfecting his scorn laugh

and getting punched in his smug face

booker is getting very excited about roman

well, i guess someone has to

roman cocks his fist, goes for it, jj reverse into a crossface because seriously, fuck that face

pan out again to cena looking deeply dissatisfied

truly, a man of the people

that's what we all look like when roman's winning things

okay, i hate roman reigns and all the things he does, but even i have to admit that samoan drop counter was pretty sweet

but now we're back to jj suplexing him to the underworld, so all is good

corey claims jj is "driven by failure"

truly, the next great renewable energy source

booker magnanimously agrees to stop calling jason a rookie, despite the bit where he was nxt and smackdown tag champ

jason exposes his shoulders (his other fuel source), hits the rolling double northern lights for a nearfall

then crossface for a near finish

booker sarcastically calls jj "what [roman] calls a rookie"

you were calling him that THREE FUCKING MINUTES AGO, YOU COLOSSAL WANKSPONGE

roman bullfights jj really hard into the post, superman punch, goes oooooo, spear for the pin

pan out to cena looking begrudgingly impressed

tense faceoff

roman gives jj the handshake

that'll do, pig

pan out again, and now charly is there

asks cena for his thoughts, he's just like i'm gonna go out there and tell him myself

after this total bellas ad

he didn't say that last part, but i know he understands the value of his wife's brand

(wait, are they marrried yet?)

cena drops his towel on the stage, camera focuses on it for a weirdly long time

forgoes his run to the ring to do a thug strut instead

clearly the camera guy needs to work on their cardio

cena appreciates that

thoughtfully gets two mics before getting into the ring

throws roman one with a comment about his fashion sense

asks for his thoughts, suggests some helpful catchphrases so he doesn't have to talk too long

roman claims to have had more good matches in two years than cena has in his career

cena's just like dude, seriously, stop talking, you're burying yourself

calls him a one-man human centipede

keep it pg, john

cena challenges himself every day to try everything

take that as you will

cena gets up in roman's face about how he's shat the bed on every opportunity available

not inaccurate

roman calls him a bitch

devastating comeback

roman claims to be solely responsible for raw's ticket sales

paul heyman's like um

disparages cena's hollywood aspirations, offers to introduce him to a guy

cena's like at no mercy, consider me like a drug test, you ain't getting past me

crowd goes oooooooooooh

even roman smirks

and swagger off

next up, sasha banks does a thing

after this advert for lesnar/strowman

(and if their compound couple name isn't lensman, i'll punch something)

and another one for cute kids with cancer

(and the prevention of such things)

and now that's all done with, here's sasha

in an even nicer jacket than usual

fighting emma, who doesn't get an intro this time

siiiiiigh

i mean, i hate her new music, but still

oh, and alexa's materialised on announce

and inside the ring, emma has 100% stolen alexa's iron man gear

first the music, then the space cop gear

where will it end

oh hey, here comes nia

who gets her full intro despite being in street clothes and there being a fucking match in progress

cut to ads, and when we get back nia's got a seat on announce too

like oh hey guys don't mind me

oh, there's still a match happening

who knew

wow, this is tepid as fuck

like, i love all four of these, but they're still conspiring to make this segment so dull

and bank statement from nowhere for the tap

so yeah, that happened

still optimistic for the four-way, though

and not just because the fallout from that would be the perfect moment to debut asuka

but now, let's have an overdramatic recap package of braun/show coming out of their cage

(and feeling just fine)

(yeah, i stole that joke, but it's perfect, so fuck off)

apparently show got injured

so, yknow, swings and roundabouts

(and we all know i can get away with that because a) it's almost definitely a work, and b) it's the big show)

brock up next

greeeeeeat

after this advert for smackdown, now with 100% more mcmahonity

oh wait, shane got suspended

so i guess the number stays the same

just been shot with a mad science aging ray

anyway, yeah, brock is here

which is why i'm distracting myself with jokes about the mathematics of mcmahons

(mcmahoths?)

paul continues to get mad pops by saying his name and listing adjectives

paul's just like i'm meant to be here to sell you on no mercy, but it's already generated all the hype in the world

possibly untrue

confirmed: braun's announce table origami combo sounds a lot dumber when a middle-aged accountant type describes it without the aid of video replays

paul says braun will need to rip the championship from brock's hands if he wants it

paul throws in some ufc references, because apparently people still pop for that

paul calls braun out with some enormous histrionics

and here he comes

brock tries to go straight into suplexes, gets punched in his grinning idiot face

then lands one, braun just stands up like nope

and chokeslams him

this is the shit i do like

and then running powerslam

fuck you, mr lesnar

picks up the belt so he can contemplate it for a bit, then stands on brock so he can brandish it aloft

then sarcastically puts it down on brock's chest and pats it like you just take care of my belt for a couple weeks

and swaggers off while brock lies in the ring hugging his belt

apparently tonight, we have miztv with enzo

what did we do to deserve this

but up next, bray does a thing

after cole tells us about the hurricanes

the crowd stay as classy and respectful as they ever do in a serious moment

by which i do of course mean they woo like a bunch of owls on meth

and now here comes goldust

you're not bray

although it is nice to see him actually get a match rather than just sending in his videos

ah, here's bray

doing a sermon over the tron first

continuing his crusade against people who wear face paint

bray wyatt vs icp confirmed for mania 34

booker boldly theorises that bray may be more concerned with collecting his enemies' souls rather than championships

no shit, dude

did you miss the bit where he delivered a screaming promo while anointing himself with the ashen earth from the burnt grave of the devil's sister or something

bray wins in about two minutes, doesn't even need to do the spider walk

did give goldust a chance to show off that he can still do this shit, though

bray produces a handkerchief, proceeds to scrub the paint off goldust's face to the boos of the crowd

proclaims that HE'S JUST A MAAAAAN

no shit

that paint slides right off if he fights for more than a couple minutes

finn takes offence, rushes the ring and chases bray away

bray walks slowly backwards up the ramp while giving finn uncomfortable eye contact, end thing

but now, charly interviews sheamus and cesaro

and the camera guy works very hard trying to keep the three of them in frame together

it's not really possible

apparently they're gonna leave seth and dean with punctured lungs at no mercy

seems excessive

but yeah, they're fighting the good brothers next

after this advert for the myc final

(it was great, thanks for asking)

seth and dean are on announce

dean's brought binoculars and a notepad so he can scout the competition

cole's like um dude, you know we have monitors

dean teaches seth how to use binoculars

and now they're scoring gallows and anderson on their fashion sense

and then derail the kkb's entrance by shittalking them

and then getting in a fight

and anderson and gallows can't bear to leave a good fight unjoined, so run up the ramp to brawl

gallows punches sheamus so hard his kilt falls off

security pulls them all apart, announce team are like welp guess that's a no on the match

but now, have this tapout body spray advert, featuring john cena as a presumably attractive-smelling superhero

and now you get a recap video of the team brawls we just had

cut to kurt's office, seth and dean demand a match against FUCKING EVERYONE tonight

kurt says they can have it, as long as they find two partners to even the numbers

crowd knows where this is going, immedately begins the delete chants

dean promises to find some, even if they have to go to disneyworld and bring back mickey mouse and batman

kurt clarifies that their partners do in fact have to be real people

dean shrugs like w/e man i can't tell the difference i just did a whole bunch of speed and some moss i found growing under the storm drain outside my apartment well i say apartment it's a sheet of corrugated iron against a wall under a bridge well i say wall it's a bear i knifed in a fight over half a can of special brew well at least that's what mad harry who makes it calls it anyway i don't care let's fucking GOOOOOO

(possible paraphrase)

they leave kurt to be like hmm, i guess batman would be a great partner

oh hey, here's a promo clip for asuka

confirmed for raw

but then, we all knew that was coming

pan out to nia watching it like pah

alexa appears at her elbow to be like gawd all these randos turning up in our division and our matches the fuck is wrong with people

does a spot-on emma impression

calls nia her best friend, she's immediately like ummmmmm no

alexa claims all their  troubles are just because she has trouble expressing her emotions

nia's like cool let's be friends oh btw i asked kurt for a match with you next week

walks off, slow zoom on alexa's face like WHAT HATH GOD WROUGHT

up next, elias has a new song, after this ad for champions

i love how they're always like OMG DEBUTING A NEW SONG

like

has he ever reused material

well, here he is, still shedding names like a snake with some kind of dermatological disorder

crowd are weirdly supportive, then surprised when he badmouths their city

(which turns out to be anaheim)

like

have they ever watched his segments before

oh, and here's kalisto

one day, elias will finish a song

i have faith

cole refers to kalisto as a lucha libre

the man is his own style

i have but moments to appreciate the rusk-style elias world tour shirt he's got before he shreds it like the new regeneration of hulk hogan

wait a second, why isn't kalisto competing in the cruiserweight decision yet?

that'd be great

anyway, he gets stomped on and neckbroken for the pin

speaking of underappreciated former nxt tag champs

but up next, jaun strowna

after another ad for smackown

and here's john again

he's found his towel again

leaves it on the announce table, because it's one of the things they're auctioning

so fair enough

cena grimaces up the ramp a bit, rips his shirt off while waiting for braun to turn up

roars into the arena, fashionably late as ever

stands in the ring pawing at the ground for a bit

wait, are we meant to be getting bullfight vibes from this?

is cena going to start sticking spears into braun's shoulders to slow him down

pan out to roman watching the match, holding a towel for some reason

braun's getting like 90% of the offense in this, and it's great

frankly, any time braun strowman dropkicks soemone, i am entirely on board with it

the crowd agree

i think they're trying to get braun heel heat here, not sure anyone gives a shit

i mean, i know it's mostly to get cena further over as a face, but still

braun's built a massive stock of goodwill off trying to murder roman reigns

they keep making a thing in this of john going for the aa but not being able to get strowman in the air

like

i get where they're going, but we've seen him aa big show and pick brock lesnar up with one arm

these power levels are more wildly inconsistent than dbz

cena sets up a five knuckle shuffle, braun just stands up and turns it into a spinebuster

cena gets an aa off it anyway for some reason, braun makes it out of the ring

and then hits him with the ring steps for a dq

wait, they're not treating this like it's over

are they somehow arguing that braun was just holding them when cena ran into them

i understand nothing

and then braun powerslams him onto the steps, which would be completely normal usually but causes a dq here

or

wait

they're playing his music

are they playing that as the medics called it off?

i have no fucking clue

charly turns up to interview roman, he says something banal that i managed to just tune out entirely

give it a few more weeks, and eventually every time he opens his mouth all i'll hear will be womp womp womp like charlie brown's teacher

but up next, miztv with enzo

sighhhhhhh

after this ad for total bellas

(also sigh)

and one for the myc final

(non-sigh)

but now, dean tries to recruit random runners into their tag team

seth's like yeahhhhhh maybe not

and then they run into dean malenko and a friend?

and decide against it

and then the hardyz

there we go

matt's being even more obviously broken than usual

and here are team miz

maryse in a bright red power suit that, as ever, i would wear the fuck out of

bo still hasn't given ariya his jacket back yet

ooh, apparently miz and maryse have an announcement

maryse is pregnant

and they're both just looking genuinely happy and it's so different to normal miz segments

so of course, miz immediately takes the opportunity to talk shit about kurt angle's parenting

starts reading a prepared speech about fatherhood, enzo cuts in with his intro

what a bellend

dressed even more than the create-a-wanker 'randomise' function than usual

claims he's just coming to celebrate with friends, makes eyes at maryse

miz just immediately tears him a new one about his lack of solo prospects

i love angry miz

just like listen dude, i understand being hated, so let me tell you: everyone fucking ~haaaaaaaaates~ you

wow, yeah, this is just miz absolutely unleashing

see, enzo, this is how you talk smack that people understand

enzo responds by shouting at him about realness

yeah, enzo, copying someone's finisher is totally a heinous act that you would never do

promises to come back to raw with the cruiserweight belt and beat miz too

miz pledges to show enzo what a real champion looks like, dedicates his victory to their unborn child

yknow, as you do

cut to ads, during which kurt agreed to the match on the grounds that once a wrestling match has been proposed, it 100% has to happen

miz's opponent immediately runs out of the ring to rant on mic for once

must be unfamiliar territory for him

miz returns the favour while mashing enzo's face into the apron

and then foolishly decides to pause to talk on mic while on the top rope

gets inevitably crotched

enzo takes the opportunity to question the baby's parentage, miztourage join in on kicking yet more shit out of him

dq sounded, miz doesn't even slightly care

but up next, the 8-man tag we all expected

ads for our other shows later, cut backstage and enzo's coughing blood and reconsidering his life choices

runs into neville, who gives an award-winning cackle and walks off

seth and dean do solo intros this time

they really need to get some kind of joint intro

what would that sound like

who could say

although i am a bit attached to BURRRRRN IT DOWWWWWWWWWWWWWN

match begins, i am distracted from matt hardy's shambling weirdness by his sweet-ass trousers

matt gets sheamus and cesaro on the outside, jeff does poetry in motion over the ropes because OH MY GOD AN OPPORTUNITY TO JUMP OFF A THING

i sometimes feel like matt needs to stop enabling his brother

if you thought this match would be huge and messy, you win nothing because of fucking course it is

enjoyable though

cesaro nearly stacks it off the top rope setting up for a flying uppercut/back senton combo, matt kind of flips sideways through the ropes to get the break, gets their at about a count of five to find out the ref had stopped the count at two anyway

dean manages to escape a magic killer attempt to punch gallows in the throat

seth finally hot tags in, burns everyone down

including completely no-selling anderson's attempts to interfere from outside

matt hits gallows with a twist of fate, then the hardyz intimidate the kkb away from the ring while seth and dean hit kingslayer to dirty deeds for the pin on anderson

sheamus and cesaro stand at the top of the ramp doing their thumb thing, the faces stand in the ring celebrating their actual use of tactics for once, and so we fade

i say 'we'

but as we all know, this is the blog that never sleeps

(offer not valid when i miss updates because i overslept)

so i think it's high time we rolled on some MONDAY AFTERNOON SMACKDOWN!

oh god, it's going to include vince and his floppy swagger

fuuuuuuuuuck

daniel, queue something else instead

okay, according to daniel, our machines are timelocked and you can only change the video queue between 11:03 and 11:36

yknow, every week it becomes more and more clear to me why we get these offices for free

well, if it's gonna play anyway, let's get our down smacked and we open on the ongoing shane/kevin controversy

this remains one of the more close-to-the-bone promos in recent times

wow, this is a long recap

previously on smackdown (and assuming neither you nor anyone you know has watched it)

so yes, we're in vegas, and we're making this into an event episode because we don't have a ppv for a little while

and also because vince has sufficiently recovered from the last time he was exposed to Earth air

anyway, here's kevin

and i had forgotten how good this announce team was

kevin welcomes us to his show, reiterates his deep and abiding trauma and restraint when he didn't fight back

so now when he's sued everybody in wwe to death we're gonna get "Kevin Owens Presents: The Kevin Owens Show, starring Kevin Owens"

pledges to fire sami and make tom and byron share a suit

and cancel the fashion files

right, officially irredeemable now

calls vince out so he can talk business

foolishly calls out "Mr McMahon", so here's...dolph?

doing shane's entrance

sure, why not

kevin's like oh thank fuck a talented man who works here, i thought it was shane

lets him have the gimmick, since nobody's using it

and off he goes

kevin starts announcing more grand plans

and here's the other man who might have something to say about that

bryan just strolls into the ring like oh hey you don't actually run this show, i still exist

kevin promises bryan he'll still have a fulfilling job as a janitor on the kevin owens show

bryan hits back with a crack about kevin's weight

sighhhhh

sort it out, dude

ominously promises the imminent arrival of the vince

kevin's basically like yeah whatever -drops mic, walks off-

so yes, later tonight we have new day/usos street fight for the title, naomi/nattie for that title, and tye/aj for -that- title

and that last one is apparently up next

after this ad for cena/roman

which i just read back as 'catwoman', despite having written it myself

and now a moment as tom and corey tell us about natural disaster season

but back to the wrestles, here's aj

and a vt of the ongoing dillinger/us championship thing

here's tye, and this time they've actually synced his tron properly

bell rings, commence to UNNECESSARILY FAST WRESTLING

but then, anything to distract us all from tye's hairstyle

baron runs in, aj redirects a phenomenal forearm to hit him in the face

tye doesn't quite get the distraction pin, then fights out of a styles clash attempt to hit a really nice tye breaker

aj kicks out at 2.99994, then reverses another thing into a calf crusher for the tap

good match

like, felt short, but that's just the problem with this show only being two hours

tye hobbles to his feet, aj gives him the handshake, respect and love all around

and here comes baron to ruin everything

throws aj over the barricade, clotheselines tye, then end of days to aj on the floor

before announcing that next week, aj's opponent in the us title open challenge will be him

someone still needs to learn the meaning of 'open'

and now some woman i don't recognise interviews rusev, both of them speaking with the conviction of a hostage delivering their captor's demands

apparently bulgaria has turned its back on rusev after his failure

so now he has to kill randy to get his mojo back

or poorly-thought-out words to that effect

but up next, jinder does a thing

after a total bellas ad and a supremely tacky exterior shot of vegas, that is

here are the singhs, holding a note longer every week

and here comes the man himself, jinder mahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal

in a dark green suit/brown shirt combo that i actually kind of dig

match graphic for hiac revealed

hell in a cell 2017: this year it's METAL AS FUCK

surprisingly notable maharaja chant going there

big punjabi-canadian community in vegas, clearly

jinder promises to get inside shinsuke's head

a process that seems to consist of putting pictures of him up and laughing at them

aaaaaaand there goes the poop joke

wow

way to aim high

the singhs find this possibly dangerously funny

oh wow, calling him a michael jackson ripoff

nobody's noticed that

oh, and there's a racist stereotype

people laugh, jinder's like see, fucking americans

promises shinsuke that if he wins the belt, he too will get shat on by racists

(while being racist)

transitions into ranting in punjabi mid-sentence

cut backstage, where kevin is dictating a list of his demands as showrunner

including a limo for his buddy jimmy

oh hey, here's sami

this won't be awkward

kevin doesn't even try not to gloat

sami's like cool, whatever, literally anything will be preferable to working for you

up next, new day v usos in a sin city street fighter 3rd strike

(it's possible i should have stopped typing earlier than i did)

but first, cute kids with cancer again

and i hold myself back from being as excoriating as usual

(if you're wondering whether bottling up my pite and bitchiness like this causes me physical pain, be assured that it does)

in any case, here are the new day

only kofi and e have made it to the ring

reasonably sure xavier was there at the top of the ramp

oh, ok

they've sent him back so the usos can't say they had an advantage

seems fair

roll vt of the match we would like you to forget being the best part of summerslam

new day immediately knock the usos out of the ring and get a table

they know how to do their job, who knew

cut to ads, and suddenly e is in the corner with a chair wedged into the ropes above him for whatever reason

recaps suggest the usos put it there, so we know who it'll backfire on

oh look, e kicked one of them into it

that was quick

and then jimmy kicks it into e's face

nice spot

kofi reappears, gets his face smacked into the apron

and jimmy gets jey a kendo stick

both commence to beating on big e with it

kofi comes back, takes everyone out, gets the kendo stick

beats jimmy with it until it explodes

splinters for everyone

okay, this is moving too fast for me to narrate

basically watch the summerslam kickoff match again, but add chairs

kofi just hit jimmy in the face with a chair about six dfferent ways, then threw it at him

and then got thrown into the barricade anyway in the ugliest bump of the night

this enrages big e, who proceeds to murder jey

jey's shirt is getting destroyed, providing a handy visual identifier e splashes both of them, dances instead of going for the pin

jimmy superkicks him, he doesn't give a shit, big ending for the nearfall and then e takes a double superkick anyway

set up for a double splash, kofi kicks jey off the turnbuckle and through chekhov's table

and midnight hour for the pin

much tromboning and joviality

shot of daniel arguing with a runner backstage

graphic for naomi/nattie, during which corey completely forgets how to english

shots of the press carpet for the myc, mostly just reminding me how good steph's outfit was

oh, and ronda rousey's here tonight

oh right, we're in the women's match now

no better way to show the legitimacy and importance of your women's division than by depriving their title match of intros

naomi's got cool new gear though

and carmella's on announce

with ellsworth on a leash

because of course

all bullshit aside, this is a good match

p sure i know who wins because of video thumbnails, but we shall see

-puts in an alarm for 11:05 to change those settings-

naomi casually scorpion kicks nattie in the face like it ain't no thang nattie gets knocked out of the ring, carmella takes the opportunity to front at her with her briefcase

aaaaaand naomi planchas her and ellsworth

and nattie gets a sharpshooter off the distraction for the tap

so yeah, the outcome i expected

so that's three really good title matches down, but of course our main event will be the corporate disciplinary hearing

kevin walks in on aiden practising his opera, offers him a job singing the theme song to the kevin owens show

he freestyles something, kevin is pleased

really, i'm looking forward to this grand restructuring

more like perestroiKO

and now here's dolph

with his own entrance for once

claiming to be the single best performer in wwe history

wait, is this whole rejection of gimmicks gimmick because kfc dropped him?

has a rant, walks off, comes back as bayley

gives up halfway through after the crowd are super into it, bunches a bayley buddy

has another rant, walks off again

and now he's the ultimate warrior

this is not gonna go down well with a lot of people

has dolph just spent a lot of time on the create-an-entrance tool in 2k17?

"So this is what it's come to"

dude, warrior was around like thirty years ago

how is this new

has another rant about how no-one can do what he can and how nobody cares

throws the mic at the announce table, stomps out of the ring as it goes WHONK

somewhat ruined the moment, tbh

who am i kidding, there wasn't a moment, it was dolph ziggler

back to the ring, and someone's cleared away the dead inflatables, so here are the hype bros

to be fed to alpha 2.0

now in beta

shelton makes an impression by dragon screwing mojo through about three laws of physics

counters a rough ryder into a lovely delayed spinebuster, powerbomb-cutter combo for the pin

nearly stymied by shelton thinking chad's arms were longer than they were

learn to tag, guys

mojo shakes hands and hugs them, zack stomps off

i smell plot

but up next, oh fuck vince is here where do we keep the spirits

daniel has responded to that question with a drawing of a magnet and what i'm reasonably sure is a swarm of hornets

guess that answers that question

so yeah, one myc ad later, kevin's in ring

and here comes vince

ain't nobody got swag this floppy

and what a delightful grey/green plaid suit

(disclaimer for text: that was sarcasm, it's fucking awful)

kevin launches straight into it with a thing about how vince must be intimidated by him

a spirit long-sealed at the bottom of a dry well replies

or possibly that's vince's voice

hard to tell sometimes

oh, again with the body-negative cracks

and making fun of kevin for not fighting back because lol cowards

i mean, i know that cowardice is the ultimate insult in wrestling, but it carries a lot of unpleasant baggage

vince promises to fire kevin if he sues the company, which i'm 100% sure breaks a whole lot of labour laws

just add 'wrongful dismissal' to that docket

vince claims to have never lost a lawsuit, i don't believe it for a second

also claims the laws of the land were written for men like him, which i can believe all day

apparently shane was suspended for not killing kevin

the fuck, vince

this is seriously the worst company anyone could ever work for

vince reinstates shane, makes a match at hiac so he can murder him properly

like, i know i read too much into wrestling, but this is tying into so much rich white male dickwad shit that it's making me deeply uncomfortable

vince agrees to give him his word that he won't have any repercussions for beating the shit out of a mcmahon

so kevin hits him in the head with a mic so he bleeds everywhere

and this is why we consider contract wording, children

ref tries ineffectually to get kevin to leave, so he just kicks vince in the stomach

and i get distracted by vince's old man socks for days

vince gets up, eats a superkick

kevin throws three refs out of the way, sets up for a frog splash

that dude in the suit whose name i always forget tries to stop him

it doesn't work

kevin walks up the ramp looking like he might have realised what he just did, steph comes out in that killer pantsuit to stare daggers at him

and we fade on an awful old man bleeding from his forehead and staggering up the ramp, supported by his daughter and that dude whose name still eludes me

so hey guys, who's hyped for the myc final?

sometimes, smackdown editing outdoes itself

(it might be scott armstrong?)

(fuck, but i'm bad at faces)

right - while this blog might never sleep, the lights go out in ten minutes, so we should probably relocate

expect another post sooner rather than later, since it's no mercy on sunday

and expect a decent outro...definitely later

[sammydee27]

Although the first thought that comes to my mind when I think of the word ritual is a nefarious Voodoo ritual involving a dead chicken and someone’s hair, rituals themselves are not as sinister as you may think. Serge Kahili King describes a ritual as, “a well-defined sequence of words and actions designed to focus attention, establish significance, and achieve a beneficial result.*” For instance, we celebrate the beginning of life with baby showers, we celebrate life being lived with birthdays and the end of life with funerals. All these are modern day rituals. King goes on to explain that in order for a ritual to be fully effective, rituals must encompass four requirements:

1.It must be intellectually satisfying. 2. It must be emotionally satisfying. 3. It must have a strong beginning. 4. It must have a strong ending.

To be fully effective intellectually, every word and movement must be full of meaning that all participants and observers understand, otherwise the ritual can end up being confusing and uninteresting.

Although we have common rituals used in every day in modern society, I believe that we can also make our own rituals to help us move from one phase of our life to another.  For example, when someone goes through a break up, you might buy yourself a pint of “Ben and Jerry’s” ice cream, boxes and boxes of tissues and watch sappy romantic movies. You might even burn (or delete) all of the pictures  you have of your now ex. So what if we were to do a ritual for saying goodbye to our addict ways and welcoming in the new sober you with a ritual of our very own?

It seems that most addicts do not celebrate their sobriety in fear that they may relapse again. And although groups like AA and NA have milestone chips to celebrate lengths of sobriety, I want to concentrate on having a ritual that celebrates letting go of your old self. You may pick up a drink day after the ritual, but that is not the point I want to make. I want this ritual to be used when you feel as though you are ready to shed your old skin. It won’t change who you are, no. You’ll always be you. But it may help shine a light to a side of yourself that you have forgotten about. The part of you that is buried underneath the bottles of alcohol you have consumed over the years. The side of you that’s voice has become silenced. Let us give that part of you their voice again.

Ok! So you are ready to start the process of welcoming your sobriety into your life, what is next? Well, in this blog, I want to write down some ideas that I think may be beneficial and then you in turn can come up with your own personal ritual.

#1. Take a piece of paper and write down everything that you despise about yourself. I know, I know, this is completely opposite of the self-affirmation list we had a couple days ago, but I think clearing our heads of all the things we feel we despise will help us understand where all of this resentment comes from. Are the items listed on your paper reasons why you drink or are they caused by your drinking? Make it as detailed as possible. Put down all your hate and anger into this piece of paper, or pieces. Just get it all out.

#2 Pull out another piece of paper and write down all the thoughts that come to mind when you think of leading a sober life. What do you hope to achieve when you are sober? What problems may be fixed? Once you finished writing this down, look at both of your lists. Do any of the items on the lists cancel each other out? How did you feel when you wrote this list in comparison to the list prior? Does it make you feel more hopeful for the future? Does it get you excited or do you feel exhausted just thinking about the changes?

#3 Now, come up with a third list. In this list, I want you to write your dreams, passions and goals. What do you love to do? What makes you happy?

-Take that third list and do one of the following: if you have a safe place to do so, light it on fire. If you do not, drown that sucker! Rip it up, stomp on it, scream and shout while doing so. This list is not you but the lies your addicted self tells you. W

while you are in the process, remember or recite all the items on your 2nd list. Recite it to yourself because that is who you are going to be. No maybes, no ifs, ands or buts – you will be that person!

Once you finish, put both list 2 and 3 somewhere where you can see them every day. In your wallet, on your wall at home. Maybe in your car. Add it to your list of positive affirmations and keep it close to you.

I know this may sound like a stupid ritual, but you need all the positivity you can get while you are sober. You need to be reminded of what a wonderful, caring and amazing person you are. Your addictive voice is strong and will keep putting you down as much as possible. There will be days where all you want to do is drink, one last time. But take out these lists and remind yourself. Remind yourself of who you are and what you can be. Maybe you will still drink that night, but there is always another day. And the kinder you treat yourself, the easier letting go of drinking will be.

Some other rituals that you can do to help you along your path of recovery are listed below. I know that addiction is a brutal obstacle to overcome, but you can do it. We can do it. If you ever need someone tot talk to, reach out to me. I am here.

Rituals

Go to AA meetings:

You may not like AA or maybe you do not agree with some of the beliefs they have, but GO! Take what helps and leave the rest. It was difficult for me to go at first. I put it off for months, but finally started going to a young people’s meeting that meets at 8pm almost every night. It is in these rooms that I met friends who understand what I am going through. I met people who could relate to me and talk to me about their experiences. And, in every meeting, I can take away something from it and relate it to my own life. AA helps you remember that you are not alone, because no matter how much your addiction may make you feel as though you are, you aren’t. There is a whole world of people out there waiting for you. Go meet them.

  Find your passion:

I truly believe that this is one of the most helpful pieces of advice I have gotten in recovery so far. Your addiction takes up all your time. When you are not in the thralls of your addiction, you are thinking about the next time. When you are in the thralls of it, you are engaging in those thoughts and carrying it out. Uncover a passion you can put your mind, body and soul into instead. Find something that makes you happy, that brings you to life. Writing has done this for me. I may suck at writing. I may never be able to become a successful writer, but I don’t care. It makes me happy. I feel successful whenever I engage in the act of writing. I never felt that way when I was drunk or high. You may go through different hobbies at first while you are trying to figure out which is your passion. Enjoy this because it is a process of learning more about who you are, without the voice of your addiction taking over.

  Get a sponsor. Someone who can walk you through the steps. Someone who you can talk to and vent to. Who understands what you have been through and who can be the voice of reason. I have a sponsor and although I do not stay in contact with her as much as I wish I did, I know she is always there for me. I know that going through the steps is just another opportunity for me to learn more about myself as a person. The whole journey of sobriety is to learn more about who you are. To learn to love who you are and accept yourself.

I hope this post has brought to life an idea in you to start your own ritual or find your own passion. Maybe it will help you decide to become sober and start on the journey of getting to know yourself.

As always, please share with me your thoughts, feelings and concerns on your journey through sobriety.

  http://www.huna.org/html/skritual.html

Rituals, Just another way to celebrate sobriety! Although the first thought that comes to my mind when I think of the word ritual is a nefarious Voodoo ritual involving a dead chicken and someone’s hair, rituals themselves are not as sinister as you may think.

[heff88]

Hi Wrasslin’ fans, lapsed or otherwise, you may or may not be aware that this little thing called Wrestlemania is tonight and if we get behind it, it might just make it!

We (wrestling nerds) will return to our normal dismissals after tonight, but here's a place for everyone to discuss the biggest AMERICAN wrestling event of the year in all its silly splendour in case any casuals want to get involved. Are you staying up for it? planning on catching up (full or highlights) tomorrow?

In the UK you can watch it either on Sky Box Office or WWE Network, the pre-show starts at 10 pm tonight and the main card at midnight. Given the amount of matches, it's probably safe to say this thing is gonna run til about 5 am...

But anyway, let's break down the card! (Order TBD)

PRE-SHOW: ANDRE THE GIANT MEMORIAL BATTLE ROYALE a.k.a that sweet, sweet WrestleMania payday

Mostly just a bit of fun really, throwing everyone who doesn't have a match in here, INCLUDING THE SMACKDOWN TAG CHAMPS THE USOS. Interestingly, Luke Harper isn't listed (though he might be a surprise) so at the moment the only really credible guys here are The Big Show and Braun Strowman (who should win, really). Couple NXT guys Tian Bing and Killian Dain have announced as debuting here too so look at them as outsiders, otherwise pretty forgettable. There is also rumours that a certain larger than life NFL player may make an entrance...

Prediction: BRAUUUUUUUN

NEVILLE VS AUSTIN ARIES - CRUISERWEIGHT TITLE

Shame this is on the pre-show really, they've spent the better part of the year trying to build these guys up and finally seem to have struck gold with "King" Neville proclaiming "F*** the Mackems" and no one will see them on the big stage. If you are new, (Adrian) Neville is a high-flipping Geordie lad who has recently kicked out in frustration at always been looked down upon (because he's a wee, weird looking Geordie guy) and it's been pretty great. It's kinda off Aries is the face here but anyway, this should be a good match between two excellent workers with an alright story behind it to boot.

Prediction: Aries

MAIN CARD:

Smackdown Women's Title 6-pack challenge Alexa Bliss (c) vs Becky Lynch vs Natalya vs. Mickie James vs. Carmella vs. Naomi

This WAS on the pre-show but WWE actually responded to complaints that its a bit off for the women's division they've spent the last year and a half building as a credible thing to end up on the pre-show. That said it's probably a good shout it will just open the main show instead. I love Alexa Bliss but no chance Naomi isn't taking this, she never "lost" the title and now gets to do it in front of her hometown crowd (was her "injury" a work?) but these are all credible challengers (except maybe Carmella) so should be entertaining enough. This isn't an elimination match, however, so don’t expect it to be too long.

Prediction: Naomi

RAW TAG TITLES LADDER MATCH The Club (Gallows and Anderson) (c) vs. Sheamus & Cesaro vs. Enzo & Cass

Because who doesn't love big ol' tag ladder matches at Mania? This division is a mess after tonight's hosts The New Day (don't sleep on them getting involved) ruled the titles for over a year. This should be fun at least, the only way to make this match a bit more entertaining was to throw some ladders in the mix, although big fella Sheamo might not agree after he received several stitches taking a ladder shot on RAW this week. There are also A LOT of rumours of the Hardys getting involved here but I'm not sold on that just now (would make sense regarding ladders mind). But if not, I think, sadly, this is Enzo & Cass's coronation even though they are clearly the weakest team of the bunch...

Predictions: DELETE! DELETE! DELETE! (but if not S-A-W-F-Ties Enzo & Cass)

INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE MATCH Dean Ambrose (c) vs Baron Corbyn

I'm surprised this isn't a no-DQ match given the build of this one. For the uninitiated, Ambrose is "TOTALLY INSANE" whereas “Big Banter Breakfast” Corbyn is a "Lone Wolf" who's gimmick is that he really believes himself to be the next top guy (and fair play to him, I guess). Highlights have included Corbyn trying to murder Ambrose by crushing him with a forklift (which they keep mentioning totally earnestly because WRASSLIN’) and Ambrose literally switching Corbyn off during an interview. Hard to know where Ambrose is at the moment, he started last year SUPA HOT FIRE and seems to have lost all momentum, so would expect this to be Corbyn's moment to prove himself.

Prediction: Corbyn takes the Intercontinental title, labour party, to new heights.

BIG SILLY MIXED TAG TEAM/MARRIAGE PROPOSAL MATCH John Cena & Nikki Bella vs The Miz and Maryse

Holy crap, what a build, what a year these guys have had. On any other year (remember these two headlined a WrestleMania only 6 years ago) this would be the stupidest match on the card... and it is and will be, but that is not a bad thing. This will be pure "sports entertainment" and you know what, I'm actually kinda looking forward to it? Everyone involved's stock has flown up over the course of the last year, and the build for this between them has actually been amazing (If you haven't seen them, do yourself a favour and check out Miz and Maryse impersonating Cena and Nikki, it's been amazing). This will be a classic "Good guys conquer bad guys" match Cena has been having forever, but for once he's (well, WWE) aren't burying young talent and can see Miz and Maryse coming out of this looking great. I expect Daniel Bryan will get involved in some way (returning the kicks Miz stole from him probably) and Cena proposes to Nikki after, with the rest of the show just being the two of them banging in the middle of the ring.

Predictions: It would be AMAZING if Miz and Maryse won, but it's not going to happen, so let's just enjoy this for what it is.

UNITED STATES TITLE MATCH (but oh so much more) Chris Jericho (c) vs Kevin Owens

This is a title match, but it is SO MUCH MORE. This has had almost a year build, as Jericho and Owens became best friends and literally carried post-split RAW for its first few months. Owens had to give up the big boy title for the big boy match for this, and everyone kinda forgot Jericho was a champion, so the title isn't really important, this is the culmination of the greatest betrayal since The Shield or Shawn Michaels put Marty Jannetty through the barber shop window. This has the potential to be MOTN as Jericho is still "the best at what he does, maaaaaaaan" and Owens is just a fantastic heel. Owens should win, however, for this story to really make sense (but this might carry over to RAW tomorrow)

Prediction: KOMania2

RAW Women's title match, 4-way Elimination match Bayley (c) vs. Charlotte Flair vs. Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax

You'll notice (if you're still reading) both women's matches are basically just big smodges just to get everyone (except Dana Brooke, lol) involved. The Women stole the show last year, but I can't really see it happening this year. Since that incredible encounter, Charlotte and Sasha have fought forever, as have, to a lesser extent, Bayley and Nia Jax, and so here we are. Bayley's not had a great run as champion and kinda needs to go back to being the underdog. Sasha has been teasing a heel turn which very much could/should happen here, Nia Jax is big and that so if she doesn't win she's probably getting DQ'd? (If that's a thing, wrestling can never make up its mind about that) Or if not ganged up on. So I guess that leaves Charlotte to become a 5 time champion on her run to match (or beat) her father's record in the space of like 2 years through short reigns (I'm sure Flair had a few microscopic runs too during mid-90s WCW). The most intriguing thing about this match is that it is elimination, but otherwise, thoroughly un-hyped for this one, sadly.

Prediction: Sasha heel turn on Bayley, Nia gets screwed somehow, Charlotte wins.

MAIN EVENT MATCHES: Shane McMahon vs AJ Styles (because we had nothing better to do for our universally praised wrestler of the year than fight the boss's son)

Who the hell knows, we could have had Michaels vs Styles man. I respect Michaels decision not to come out of retirement, but man, we're left with THIS? I don't really know what to say, they're building this as a regular wrestling match, so in theory Styles should squash Shane O'Mac, but I guess he's gonna need to jump off something for some reason because it's him? I have faith in Styles to produce some magic with Shane (because, hell, if he can do it with Ellsworth then surely here) but man, they better be putting the title on Styles for a year after this to break CM Punk's record or something.

Predictions: Shane to jump off the rollercoaster set or the giant fake ring above the normal one (which looks really weird by the way), Styles obviously to win because otherwise, I might just give up.

"NON-SANCTIONED" MATCH Seth Rollins vs Triple H

When did Un-sanctioned become Non-sanctioned? Anyway, if you don't know what this means, basically its a "kayfabe" (storyline) way of saying this match "shouldn't be happening officially" and therefore these two can use all of WWE's facilities to beat the crap out of each other. Or something. This match pretty much depends on how healthy Rollins is (apparently he's had the flu all week, the guy really can't catch a break huh?) and he's returning from a knee injury (hence the non-sanctioned thing). If he's healthy and all is good, this could be a decent blow-off to a long, drawn out build in which Triple H screwed Seth out of the title back in August and then everyone forgot about it for a while. We will just have to see.

Prediction: Rollins, Triple H might be a heel but his actual real-life heel days are long past. That said, it being a non-sanctioned match, expect a lot of shenanigans from Samoa Joe (and/or maybe Finn?) given he'll be allowed to basically turn this into a handicap match.

IT'S MY YARD! NO, IT'S MINE! MATCH Roman Reigns (boo) vs The Undertaker

Holy S***, Roman Reigns got booed at the Hall of Fame induction. That is some seriously dumb, needy reactions from the fans but it is also a sign of things to come. It takes a lot for me to feel sorry for Reigns but that was insane. Anyway, this match is much more dependent on The Undertaker who isn't, in fact, a dead man and is indeed ageing quite rapidly at this point. He did not look good at the Rumble at all and he barely had to do anything against Shane last year, so who knows. Reigns, love him or hate him, is a reliable safe pair of hands in "big matches" and you know what, it actually makes much more sense for him to beat The Undertaker and go full heel (PLEASE WWE, we beg you). Triple H made an interesting comment the other day that "Well, Reigns basically is a heel to most of you anyway, so we can kinda book him how we like" so maybe not. Anyway, there's some chat that this should close the show, but I don't think so, personally, unless this really is Taker’s last dance. This might be alright, we'll have to see how long it takes Taker to get to the ring (gonna guess half an hour) but PLEASE guys if you are putting Reigns over tonight PLEASE do not get Taker to raise his hand in respect. You WILL get a full-scale riot on your hands (then again, maybe that's what they want).

Predictions: Reigns (sadly?). Apparently, J.R is calling this one too, fuelling the retirement rumours.

WWE UNIVERSAL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH WILLIAM GOLDBERG (c) vs BORK LESNAR w/ Paul Heyman

*sigh* The main dispute over who closes the show is between the two title matches. I personally think it will be this but in the spirit of the rumble winner, we will stick to that format for now. This match could be good. It could be. It just depends on if Goldberg (who also got booed at the Hall of Fame, interestingly) can go longer than 5 minutes. This is the big epic culmination of the grand total of about 3 minutes of actual wrestling so far, as Goldberg squashed Lesnar at Survivor Series (which was a great moment in all honesty) and then eliminated him with relative ease at the Rumble. This is also a "WrestleMania XX apology match" after that utter car-crash of a match which ruined an otherwise solid, though controversial, purely because of Benoit, Mania. So basically, this match HAS to be at least 5-10 minutes. It doesn't need to be a big long "slobber knocker" but it does need to at least feel like a big bruising end to one of the company's biggest but most controversial storylines, given two part-timers are fighting over one of its main belts. I'm quietly confident that they will deliver something worthwhile, but I also wouldn't be surprised if it's an utter mess.

Prediction: Lesnar finally conquers Goldberg, although apparently the latter is booked for RAW tomorrow? Also, maybe, just maybe Finn Balor shows up (here or tomorrow).

WWE TITLE MATCH Bray Wyatt (c) vs. Randy Orton

This might be on before the two other matches, but as Randy Orton is this year's Royal Rumble winner, let's stick with “tradition” for the purposes of this write-up.

This storyline has been wild. It has also been a lot of fun and very self-referentially "Attitude Era Wrasslin’" so I must say I've enjoyed it a lot and if nothing else, Bray Wyatt has actually finally got to be the champion for a bit and looked pretty menacing doing it. There's still the Luke Harper issue to be resolved here (and perhaps a return for forgotten Wyatt family member Erick Rowan?) but this should be a pretty solid main event. Orton isn't amazing, we all know that, but he does have the ability to turn matches on their head in an instant (as does Wyatt, for that matter) and this storyline, crazy as it has been, has been great for both of them. Expect maybe some supernatural happenings too given the whole "NO, I HAVE THE SPIRIT OF SISTER ABIGAIL" dispute.

Prediction: Orton.

And so there we have it. Phew, this took as long to write as its probably going to be to watch it, but there we are. I hope this was worth writing down for someone anyway. Overall, this is an intriguing Mania which hasn't had the best build but, on the Raw side especially, that's kinda typical of where WWE is at right now. There are a lot of variables going into tonight, but there is a lot of potential too. We shall see. I just hope not to be too drunk/tired and end up missing the main event like last year (although to be fair, that was a total snoozefest).

Let me know your thoughts, feelings, predictions and Wrestlemania plans! Or tell me to shut up and I'll get a mod to merge this with the other wrestling thread. For now, I'm off for a walk while I still can.