#wiki dive and look it up everywhere I can to see what fun facts I can find so Iprobably wouldn't miss what each choice consequences are lol
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I uh. Highly recommend the letter yes 100% every woman is very mentally ill and problematic, great stuff. I do recommend playing the game yourself as opposed to watching a playthrough, just because there’s a lot of different choices and alternate paths and part of the fun is making your own story. It’s also something that I feel like needs to be played more than once so you can do completely different scenarios. Like I’m sure it’s fine to watch a playthrough, it’s just likely that it won’t properly cover what the whole game has to offer. But eh this could just be the way that I play games
If you do play/watch it though just know that I will be shaking in my boots so apologies in advance 😩
I was gonna tell you I don't have twenty dollars to play that but I went to check and it actually didn't get taxed to hell and back so it's about the same amount I payed for ztd so it's like DEFINITELY affordable– but idk I might still watch at least the intro before there's any choices or just hop videos or something because you don't understand how fucking incapable I am of sitting down to play things I don't already have a 3+ year emotional investment in I have been playing pkmd for almost two years now and I don't even think I hit the middle and that bitch's on my goddamn phone but I refuse to touch anything unless I have the time to concentrate solely on it and I simply do not have the availability atm 😭
#my vacation a month from now IS gonna be pretty long tho so like#what I'll probably try to do is watch the start and then MAYBE hold off on it so I can treat myself and play through it in July#the problematic women have captivated me I definitely wanna know what this game's about#also lmao don't worry about the alternate playthroughs I cannot enjoy anything casually and will always#wiki dive and look it up everywhere I can to see what fun facts I can find so Iprobably wouldn't miss what each choice consequences are lol#thanks for the apologies in advance I hope it's real fucked up and cosumes my life and destroys me emotionally 😊#reminde I am xvery drowsy answering this#a tag for asks
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The Thrilling Saga of Connie paying real life money for the Worst Sonic TV Show
Let’s begin with the simple fact that me and my sister, @birdsareblooming “Cori”, have both been hyperfixating on Sonic the Hedgehog since last March. During this hyperfixation, I was on Sonic Wiki to copy-paste song lyrics onto my stolen mp3s, and I called my sister in and pointed at the template at the bottom.
“What is this Sonic Underground thing?” I asked. “It has one shit billion songs.”
So we clicked on the page to read about it, and each sentence we read was a punch in the gut and this quickly became the funniest thing we’d ever read. Highlights include:
It looks like this:
“Sonic[...] is known to be a prince”
Sonic has two siblings who actually have good characterization but their names are literally just Sonia and Manic. Like. Sonic split into two names. jesus christ
Also Sonic and his siblings all share a voice actor. honestly Jaleel White does his best with it but
“The three siblings possess enchanted medallions that transform not only into musical instruments, but also into weapons.”
“Some fans consider Sonia to be a clone of Amy Rose, minus the attraction Amy feels for Sonic.” YEAH I SURE HOPE IT DOES
“Manic is the most often captured of the siblings” himbo king
Knuckles shows up, and for the first, like, two sentences his description is very similar to the game, and then you get immediately pulverized by “He has a pet Dinosaur called Chomps.”
Literally so many sentences on Sonic Wiki are lowkey salty about this show. The page features lines such as “Sonic Underground bears little relation to the often complex Sonic universe (including previous animated series, as well as Sonic comics and games), and shares only three established characters” and “many of the characters in the Freedom Fighter group that were in Sonic the Hedgehog are completely left out (including Tails).”
“The show met with mostly negative reviews.”
*checks air dates* It only lasted two goddamn months
So after seeing this we thought it was the funniest thing and we showed our older sister, @patema-introverted “North.” To our surprise, our at the time “knew nothing about this sonic bullshit” sister recognized the show. Turns out she’d seen trailers for it as a child and that was her sole exposure to Sonic canon.
We were in quarantine at the time, so we ended up finding it on YouTube and binge-watching it all together as a sibling bonding activity. It was just as hilarious as we thought it would be- some stuff was legitimately good, like the sibling dialogue for instance, but good lord were the character designs ugly, the plot all over the place, and pretty much every song, um, not great. Also there was one episode that we skipped because it got, um, I think “stereotypical” is the nicest word I can use here.
But the point is, we had a jolly good time watching it, and afterwards we binged all the other Sonic shows and bonded as a family.
After quarantine, North and I go back to college. My roommate gets groceries at Walmart, while I get them elsewhere, so while she and North collect food I wander the DVD aisle to look at the cool movies and also dumpster-dive in the bargain bin for Cats (2019). I am also short as fuck, so the top shelf of movies I cannot see, I can only read the labels.
So one day I was browsing the DVDs, and glancing over at the labels for the top shelf. I read over the final one before the shelves end.
And then I stop, do a double take, and have a heart attack, because there is a label that reads “SONIC UNDERGROUND $3.74″
I immediately climb the shelf but there aren’t any DVDs atop the shelf. However, the label is still there. I excitedly tell my sister and roommates, freak out with them a bit, and then give myself a mission statement:
I will buy the $4 Sonic Underground DVD from Walmart
I did not want it as a gift, I did not want to find it online. I wanted to walk into a store, pick up the Worst Sonic Show on DVD, walk it straight to the checkout, and in front of the cashier and God, pay for it with my own money. I did not care if it was the whole series or two episodes; I needed to do this for my own serotonin.
We would go to Walmart about once a week. Every time, I would go to the DVD aisle, and go right to the end of the shelves. I would stare at the label SONIC UNDERGROUND $3.74 and empty space above it and wonder who the fuck was buying this other than me. I would occasionally ask employees if they had any copies in storage. I would build a shrine to Manic in my room. Okay, no I didn’t, but only because my RA would have murdered me.
Christmas break comes, and we have to go home. We have a nice Christmas, and Cori and I infodump at each other about how we would make Sonic Underground a good show (note: we’re both galaxy braining) and also play Bendy and the Ink Machine. Fun times.
When we finally get back to College, it’s late January- long story short we have a very long winter break. My roommate who gets food at Walmart got food without us the first week cause she showed up first, so we take her out to Walmart the first time in the year of our lord 2021 on January 29.
I wander the Valentine’s aisle, immediately grabbing a sequin puppy. I go to the DVDs and see Animaniacs Season One, also grab that.
And then.
There it is.
The Holy Grail.
Above the label SONIC UNDERGROUND $3.74, is one DVD left.
Already I am losing my mind. It’s roughly seven hours of episodes- I couldn’t find an episode list, but I think that’s half the show, for $4! And the cover is amazing.
That’s a png of Sonic from Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog (1993) with a medallion badly photoshopped over it. The medallion is too small.
Manic is shoved into the corner. He doesn’t have his medallion at all.
Sonia isn’t even pictured on the front cover, probably because they realized she was the worst designed of the bunch. I’m not ragging on her though, because she’s still one of the better designed characters of the show. Those background characters make me cry
So you bet your ass I finally paid my hard-earned $4 for this shit. Upon getting home, I discovered that there was even wilder shit with this DVD than I thought.
For starters: the bonus features listed are as follows:
Original Concept Art - did not expect that these character designs were the final draft
Storyboard-to-screen - did not expect they bothered to storyboard this
Music Video Jukebox - that’s cute, they thought we liked the music
Interviews with original screenwriter & executive producer - I fully expect the only questions to be “why.”
On the left of this list are screenshots from the show, where people can finally see Sonia, who we Know™ is a girl because she is pink and has hair and also an actual body shape instead of just circles like her brothers.
But wait... what’s that in the lefthand corner?
That looks like some kind of robot. But it’s not a robot from Sonic Underground! That didn’t appear once. Why is it here?
The mystery continues upon opening the DVD case: inside are advertisements for other collections, including other Sonic DVDs: two volumes of Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog (1993) and the final episodes of Sonic the Hedgehog “SatAM” (1993)
First of all, the first volume of AOSTH has the exact same PNG of Sonic as the Underground Volume 1. Not even trying to hide it. But second... the second volume of AOSTH also has this robot on its cover.
And THIS ROBOT IS ALSO DECORATING THE THIRD DISC IN THE SET?
So you may be asking, who is this robot? Is it from AOSTH or Underground?
IT’S FROM FUCKING SATAM. The one show that doesn’t have it decorating the DVD covers.
Also, not only is it from SatAM, it only appears in one fucking episode. Not a major character! AND IT HAS A DIFFERENT DESIGN ON THE PROMO ART, WITH HAIR AND FANGS.
Why is it showing up everywhere? What is going on?
I have not yet had the opportunity to watch this glorious piece of animation, but I am so glad at the confusion I have felt upon receiving it.
But before I go, I must share with you the best part of this DVD purchase. And it was flipping to the back, scanning the details, and discovering the exact runtime of the episode collection.
Guys, gals, and enby pals, friends and enemies, Nintendo and Sega, the first Volume of Sonic Underground has a runtime of...
420 MINUTES.
Maybe I’m wrong and this IS the best Sonic show.
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Astrological Compatibility
After experiencing all that I have this year, I definitely believe that astrology does play a role in compatibility, in the sense that astrology is a pseudoscience based around how time of birth, planetary cycles, and place of birth affect personality. It was developed by human beings at a time when scientific methods of interpreting data were not developed to where they are today.
If we take a look at how this might play out from a more scientific perspective, think of the “nature vs. nurture” argument. Nature applies to traits that develop either from genetics or during fetal developmental. Nurture applies to external social and developmental factors that contribute to personality after birth.
There does seem to be a correlation between what season and month people were born in and certain personality traits. It is definitely true that levels of sunlight can have a huge impact on human health and development, but light exposure and seasons can be vastly different across the globe (especially in moving closer and farther away from the equator), which is probably why detailed astrological charts involve looking at birthplace.
It also provides perspective on why there are differences between the Western and Chinese Zodiacs but there are still some similarities in the way traits are applied. For example, in the Western Zodiac we have “Earth, Air, Fire, and Water” and in the Chinese Zodiac we have “Wood, Fire, Earth, Metal, and Water” because human beings across cultures understand how valuable these elements were to our survival.
Human beings are pattern-seeking creatures, so it isn’t any surprise that they personified these elements and began correlating them to aspects of human personality. It was just another way of trying to make sense of the world, and I am not surprised that when astrologers examined the natural world and the cosmos (as better astronomical tools became available) they began to make connections between children born in certain seasons and certain personality traits, and I don’t believe the correlation is completely nonexistent.
The issue we see is that some people tend to think that personality is a fixed thing, and that when someone is born a certain way [nature] their traits are entirely resistant to change [underemphasizing nurture].
Even if astrology can offer us some predictors about how a person’s character might develop, we have to remember that personality has nothing to do with whether someone is a “good” or “bad” person. Some people may be more or less outgoing than others, more or less athletic, more or less organized, more or less playful, and more or less “nice” than other people, but that has nothing to do with their morality or ability to be a good romantic partner, friend, sibling, or parent.
The strength of a relationship is almost entirely dependent on the values of the parties involved.
Whether “star-crossed” or “star-aligned”, the strength of peoples’ relationships is entirely dependent on whether or not they are based on honesty, mutual respect, and compassion. We all know that some people we love have habits that may occasionally-- or frequently-- grate on our nerves, but our choice on whether to continue living with and loving that person is rarely just down to personality.
We all have that person in our lives with a grinchy, McScrooge disposition, but we love them because they keep their word and you know deep down that they’ve got a good heart even if they don’t always show affection as easily as other people do.
We also all know someone that is the life of the party, loud, fun, almost obnoxious in their zest for life, but we wouldn’t trust them as far as we could throw them when it comes to any major responsibility. But we still love them anyway.
And with have to admit to ourselves, that sometimes love is not enough.
Love is never an excuse to allow someone to run roughshod over your boundaries, devalue your ideas, and monopolize your time. Love alone will not save any relationship where either party lacks respect, trust, and compassion.
After ending many relationships this year (including one that I held in very high value) I found out that it isn’t about personality. “Ugh, she’s such a Virgo!” is not a mature answer for why you can’t get along with your best friend, boss, or mother.
I know that Kati Morton used to say “some relationships are bad recipes” and I don’t really believe that anymore. I don’t really believe that people share mutual blame like that for why things fall apart. It’s fine to admit that someone annoys you or gets on your nerves, but when there is that much bad blood with someone you used to be associated with, I think that boundary violations-- either on your part or theirs-- are to blame.
I used to lean towards a belief in “star matches” but now I truly believe there are no incompatible signs.
I know that I tend to lack romantic chemistry with most of my fellow Air nomads, but I always have amazing conversations and a kind of instant connection. I know that from experience, Water signs are amazing listeners. I know that I tend to have a shared drive with so many Earth signs, and that Fire signs have a unique capability to humor and delight.
Fire signs can also burn your whole life down if you let them. Water signs can be secretive and vindictive. Earth signs can be so stubborn that they won’t admit a single flaw. Air signs can be unreliable and aloof.
But guess what? So can everyone, because we all have aspects of each element inside of us. Leaning a certain way does not make us more or less bad or good. It just makes us human.
As I reflect on my experiences this year, I am far more interested in how systems of meaning develop, than the systems themselves. Astrology, just like religion, was developed by humans who desperately wanted to provide an explanation for the mysterious workings of the cosmos, our planet, and the human heart. I think whether or not astrology is “real” is far less important than the history and traditions associated with it.
Each of the signs in the Western Zodiac has a unique mythological creature and story attached to it. It was only this year that I found out that Capricorn is represented by a half-goat, half-fish creature (essentially a mergoat), and I learned that my sign (Libra) was only introduced into the zodiac later, because there was too much intensity going on between The Virgin (Virgo) and Scorpio (the Scorpion, duh) and Libra was brought in to balance things out. That is the reason why Librans are the only members of the zodiac family to not be represented by a living creature.
I also found out that this might’ve been part of it because human beings have been liking the number 12 for a good minute, so we had to even out that odd 11 sooner or later. In my numerological deep dive I also found out that Romans were freaked out by the number 17, because it was written “XVII” and that, along with the fact that it was a weird prime number, really upset their sense of symmetry. In general it seems humans are not fond of numbers that cannot be divided by anything other than 1 and itself. So 9 is in, but 13 is out, and its probably more this, rather than the fact that we don’t want a snake sign in the Zodiac, that so many astrologers soundly refuse to recognize Ophiuchus. Obviously we make an exception for 0 (both a number and not a number) and also 1 and 2.
I “wiki-walked” more and found out that a number of prominent musicians have superstitions regarding numbers, probably because our profession is way more about keeping time and counting than most people realize.
Also, it’s been fascinating to find out about “the ages” which require incredible math to calculate. We are apparently just beginning the “Age of Aquarius” and a lot of changes that were predicted using past data seem to be “coming to pass.”
Full disclosure: you can’t use astrology to predict the future of the planet anymore than you can the future of your relationship.
I use astrology to help me understand the past, but I do not trust the validity of horoscopes because it is impossible to know the future. I have developed a saying “History doesn’t repeat itself, but it echoes.” Economists, political analysists, climate scientists, and other experts in their field do not make their predictions based on “hunches” or mysterious esoteric knowledge, they make their predictions based on interpretation of data, and even if these predictions can be incredibly accurate, they are not completely infallible.
In other words, you aren’t going to experience relationship troubles during “Mercury in retrograde” unless you expect and believe you will, or some other unrelated event causes it. The only difference then is that because you were hypervigilant, you shifted your own behavior in a way that exacerbated the issues, i.e. “a self-fulfilling prophecy.”
If your marriage or friendship is failing, “astrological differences” likely aren’t the main culprit. Similarly, you should never dismiss your intuition that something is wrong just because your horoscope said, “You will find true love in December” and that is when you found it. That’s called a coincidence, and they’re everywhere. Trust yourself and trust your instincts. Your own personal patterns matters much more than what a stranger or an algorithm has predicted about you. Don’t try to “follow the signs”, test things out and see if things you find in your chart actually line up with what you’ve been experiencing.
I really do believe in some kind of carnal divinity, a common life-energy that is connecting all living beings to one another. Don’t let your natural light and vitality be dimmed by people who enjoy burying their own light under a bushel. It isn’t a matter of “good” and “evil” in so many cases, but it really is about what kind of life each person wants and/or is willing to tolerate.
That beings said, welcome to Sagittarius season! I hope you all find your inner flame archer and ride on your metaphorical horse legs right into your destiny.
#moon sign in Sagittarius#star sign compatibility#history of astrology#toxic relationships#setting healthy boundaries#horsocopes#why you're not star crossed you just have a shitty relationship#loving yourself#time to centaur it up in this place
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The Beauty of “Doin’ Your Mom” by Ray William Johnson
Love him or hate him, Ray William Johnson is a pioneer of new media. He was one of the most famous YouTubers back in the day in what was about the late 2000s and early 2010s, and was really the first dude to make a true, long-term career on the platform, forming a company just to fund his Equals Three show, which, yes, it’s somewhat unwatchable but it’s vintage YouTube so I give most of it an excuse and play it off as dated comedy from someone who was actually old enough to know better, but it was a different time and I’m actually consistently impressed by Ray and how he continues to pop up everywhere as nostalgia for the early days of YouTube starts to seep into this post-ironic era of Internet culture, as people remember the remnants of the more sincere YouTube, with people like Quinton Reviews, TheGamerFromMars and wavywebsurf making informative videos about the classic YouTube and its viral videos that propel someone into stardom for at least about 15 minutes. Now we’re in the age of a company-fuelled platform that treats its community of content creators as the fries on the side of their order of The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. Do I miss the days of “Chocolate Rain” and when any viral hit could make it through the cracks? Of course I do, but it’s not like that can’t happen and memes can’t spread, look at how Lil Nas X has taken advantage of the memes surrounding “Old Town Road” to build his own career – and it was only a matter of time before massive companies learned how to use the Internet. I’d argue Ray is at fault at least in some capacity for making the transition to a talk show highlights website a tad cooler, though, and it’s not like he wasn’t making himself and his show (As well as his animated “Band” which I’m pretty sure is just him) a brand in itself. Ray overall was a fascinating man and still is, and whilst most of his content isn’t looked upon fondly, he does have a few gems in there, like “Orphan Tears” from the Your Favorite Martian days, one I still jam to every now and then, because it’s catchy and whilst incredibly dated now due to the club beat and Bill Cosby references doesn’t feel like it won’t last the test of time like most other YouTube content that has ever been uploaded, especially its music – including the more recent stuff from people like the Paul brothers, but before “It’s Everyday Bro” there was another iconic comedy hip hop track on YouTube that I’d argue is a much more judicious choice for analysis, and it was by Fatty Spins – often stylised as FAttY SPiNS for the sake of confusion – a hip-hop collective fronted by Ray William Johnson and his friends Micfri (The white dude) and Breeze, a singer and according to this song, guitarist? They released about six known songs and have since been lost in the sands of time, at least for all we know. This is my review of the hip-hop classic, “Doin’ Your Mom”.
SONG REVIEW: “Doin’ Your Mom” – FAttY SPiNS (Ray William Johnson)
This song only has 400,000 views on its music video as we speak and it’s on the official channel for the band (The description states Micfri uploaded it) so I’m perplexed, I thought it was much bigger but I suppose it’s either a late reupload or it was never as viral as I assumed. Anyway, let’s dive deep into “Doin’ Your Mom”.
Doin’ your mom, doin’-doin’ your mom, doin’ your mom, doin-doin’ your mom...
I’m not even going to get into the absolutely insane video that screams early YouTube but it’s pretty cute, it’s just a bunch of adults probably too old to be yelling along to the repeated refrain of “Doin’ your mom” but they’re having fun with it at least, although Micfri makes no effort to actually lip-sync. My favourite shots in the video include of course the iconic intro where they walk on the street with a boombox like they just walked away from an explosion and the acapella version of the hook plays in the background like it was the most grandiose chorus in the history of music, but also honestly any shot where Ray is making a face, like at about 1:20, the shot with the green-screened purple background while the hook’s playing. I know this is intended to be funny (That’s why I didn’t do this for April Fools as I was going to; it felt too contrived) but there are parts in the video that seem so natural and like they thought the song was so much better than it is, and it’s almost more humorous than the song itself. Let’s briefly cover the instrumental while we’re here – it’s nothing all too special but it’s a fitting backing for the epic feel the song has, with the reverb and echo on Ray’s voice as he sprays over an odd yet VERY late-2000s fusion of rock and hip-hop, as there are some GarageBand-sounding guitars and a buzzing synth that help propel the intense strings that almost carry the song, with additional little tweaks like the twinkling synths adding a lot of punch but not making it too cluttered. Honestly, there are some parts of the song that seem like genuinely great musical ideas that may seem kind of wasted on this topic, like the screeching guitar solo or when the beat cuts out in the middle of each verse just to return with the guitar added and an additional synth melody, with both Ray and Micfri’s verses reflecting this change in a shift of their flow. I should probably add that Ray is actually a pretty good rapper for a YouTube personality, and his voice is suited for tracks like this (Yeah, somehow the chorus never gets old despite being repeated ad nauseum). As one of the comments said on the band’s Equals Three Wiki page (Yes, that exists and its comment section is hilariously absurd), he kind of sounds like he could voice Knuckles the Echidna. That’s enough rambling about how oddly appealing this song is sonically and let’s get straight to the meat and potatoes.
COOL TRANSiTiON
The last line of the hook has always puzzled me.
You know we straight, we doin’ your mom!
“Yes, I had to confirm I am in fact heterosexual by engaging in intercourse with your mother”. I know “Straight” is part of hip-hop slang and refers to people who don’t engage in criminal or dangerous activity like gang violence...
Yeah, we straight but if you wrinkle up the situation, he will go grab the iron – Tyler, the Creator on “OKRA”
..But did we really need reassurance from Ray William Johnson that he and his friend Micfri aren’t shooting people? – Oh, and what does this have to do with doin’ my mom? I shouldn’t worry, the verses go into fascinating detail about how Ray and Micfri met my mother as they trade bars recalling the event.
I’m doin’ your mom, yes, yours! / I first saw her in the Wal-Mart picking out your drawers
Micfri’s first verse is probably the most normal verse here, and doesn’t really have anything I can make all too much fun of other than an awful pun, until it ends because the last line is... well...
Five minutes later, she agreed to get with me / So we went and rocked the minivan like, “Giggity, giggity, giggity”
Micfri goes painfully offbeat just to shove his awkward Family Guy reference in there because I guess it still was 2010 and the show was still relevant, although I’d argue it has more of a place on YouTube now that those funny moments compilations are piling up way more views than they should. That’s all fine, right? Like there’s nothing in this verse that is too interesting, but that dreadful joke transitions pretty hilariously into when Ray comes in...
I was ridin’ your mom like she’s Mario Kart / I gave her a lift back to her crib ‘cause her car wouldn’t start
Yeah, okay, he stretches out some sentences and mumbles a few lines so they barely fit the meter but it works in such a janky manner because the rest of the song is an absolute mess anyway so if anything Ray is just making it work, because, mmm, he just gets it. I love he pronounces words here as well, it’s odd as hell, especially when he accentuates “Car” with a high-pitched and slightly Canadian accent?
How many times I tap that ass? OVER 9000!
Oh, my God, I forgot about this part. This is obviously a reference to the ancient Dragon Ball Z meme where Vegeta says Goku’s power level is at “over 9000” in the 4Kids dub and it was probably funny then, but with the gang vocals and his enthusiastic delivery, it’s even funnier now with nearly a decade of hindsight. There are some jokes that legitimately hold up though, mostly because they’re not incredibly dated and instead rely on Ray’s wit.
Yeah, she called me Pledge ‘cause I knocked the dust off her
Come on, that’s actually pretty clever, I suppose. Ray’s still a comedian after all despite all the memery so he has some clever jabs throughout his verses at least, especially the second verse, which is... even more interesting.
I like your momma’s big butt, and I cannot lie
That’s a cool reference that doesn’t feel forced because it fits in with the song. Nice, we’re seeing some improvement.
We make sexy time, yes? And every night I tap that / She saw me butt-naked, now she thinks I’m half-black
Wh... What? I thought Ray WAS half-black? Is that the joke? I don’t know, I mean seemingly it’s saying how black men are stereotyped to be packing under there but HALF-black? Aren’t you underselling yourself a bit there, Ray? Also, he’s already half-black, or at least mixed. I mean, he’s said the N-word once or twice before on Equals Three so I assumed he had to have some sort of privileges. Is he just that insanely tanned? This is probably the second most questionable punchline in the song, we’ll get to the worst one in a bit.
And I blame it on the al-al-alcohol
Wow, this song really IS dated, huh?
She likes the donkey punch, she likes the dirty Sanchez / Sometimes, she even likes to fool around in YOUR bed
Okay, that is epic, and by that I mean it’s the only bar in this track that feels like it was a good diss directed towards the listener, because most of this song goes into grim detail about the intercourse with said listener’s mother but none of it is as ruthlessly personal as that one.
And I’ll be honest, she likes me to Chris Brown her when she acts like Rihanna
Oh... Oh... That’s, uh, that’s a big yikes from me, Ray, Jesus, okay, well, this was topical in 2010 but I’m still not going to excuse this. I don’t mind using Chris Brown’s domestic assault case as a punchline against him because he deserves all the vitriol he gets, but relating him leaving Rihanna bruised and bleeding after having her phone smashed and being punched and freaking BITTEN to having rough sex with the listener’s mother is insanely insensitive, and how the drum pattern cuts out for Ray to say the last part, especially with the reverb on his voice, makes it even more awkward. You’ll be glad to know, however, that Micfri immediately justifies that horribly problematic bar with easily the best on the track.
She’s so therapeutic when I need to cure my restlessness / I (Brrrrrr) motorboat your mom’s breastesses
I don’t know if it’s the “Brrrr” or the “breastesses” but this line is hilarious to me, and I have mostly no idea why it’s such a good one. Anyway, the verses are finished now, so you expect us to have just a few repeats of the chorus until the song ends, right? But no. We have a bridge, and it’s the gorgeous climax of the song (No pun intended) that honestly may just be the best part, other than the comments on its Wiki page, but we’ll get to that. Breeze croons the bridge in cheap Auto-Tune, and the amount of vocal effects that are added unnecessarily to accentuate the oddly profound lyrics here, that are said only twice but are so essential to why the song has aged much better than it seems to have on the surface.
I’m havin’ sex with your mother and that makes me (Better, better) better than you
There’s something I can’t describe about this bridge and the subsequent guitar solo that makes it work so effectively, and I’m left speechless by it every time. The best part is I’m not joking for the most part, and this song, despite its mind-numbing chorus and incredibly dated and at some times shockingly offensive lyrics, it’s aged incredibly well because it knows it will not be taken seriously and is entirely self-aware, but in a way that doesn’t seep into the song’s content. Most memes these days are TOO self-aware, so when a legitimate, genuine meme comes along that embraces it instead of revelling in it, I’m fully supportive.
You was at the club / Bottoms up when I first met you – The Boyboy Westcoast on “Bottoms Up”
Boyboy embraces the meme and he has a very lighthearted perspective and modest attitude on the song that makes his self-awareness less of an aging factor, and it’s the same for Ray, but some of the memes feel self-aware to a fault when they’re all too loud about the sarcastic manner in which they desperately cling onto a self-awareness that may not actually be there, like when the Backpack Kid did that awfully cringeworthy Verified video on Genius about his flossing song. The heart wasn’t there and it felt plastic and manufactured, but it’s all present in Ray, Micfri and Breeze, as they’re all having fun dancing in the video and while they know they’re really stupid and they look like lunatics, they don’t care... and disregarding the comments of the wiki page in which anonymous users respond to in-depth analysis and rankings of the Mario Kart games with “I will end you”, and no, I’m not kidding, that is the beauty of “Doin’ Your Mom”.
You know we straight, we doin’ your mom
deadcactuswalking
Seriously though check out the wiki page for both the song and the band (They’re linked here). The comments are beautifully absurd.
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