#why would food be any different
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#the pacific#k company#mine: misc#hbo war#initially I thought peck would be chanting McDonald’s too rather than saying there’s food at home#bc as we all know he (somehow) snagged a mistress even tho he had a wife at home#why would food be any different#but I think what it comes down to is not only their responsibility or eldest sibling energy#but it can also be about their sense of spontenaity and fun and rolling with the punches#thus peck goes in the food at home category
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What would you choose? :0c
(note: original image is from HERE (link) - but I edited it to add a wider variety of options.. also added $3 extra to the total, even though I know that makes it more uneven lol, I thought if you're adding 10 whole extra items, the money to spend should at least be increased slightly, if that makes sense..)
#I would get orange juice. black coffee. AND iced coffee ($3) because I love the variety of having multiple drinks#then sausage and scrambled eggs ($8). Then sauteed mushrooms ($3)....AND... hrm.. then spending the remaining $4 would be hard#I wish I could get waffles (as they are my favorite and are superior in every way compared to pancakes. donuts. etc.) but I'm not willing#to give up the other savory things just to get them. so... then maybe I could get a biscuit or english muffin? and just put jam or#honey butter or something on it so it can be my replacement 'sweet and bready' thing instead of something from the $5 row??#OR I could also just assume that having the orange juice plus iced coffee would provide enough of a 'sweet element' to the meal#(since I largely prefer savory foods. I only like a tiny bit of sweet added for variety) and thus forego any sort of#'bready' thing entirely and just get the bowl of beans/onion/tomato (I'd leave the avocado since I don't like the#texture of them really lol). THEN I'd have $1 left to get the milk or the black tea... increasing my total of random drinks..#which is always the goal of course.. as a chronic ''person who is sipping at 5 different drinks at their desk simultaneously always'' perso#OR... I could just do.. waffle. scrambled eggs. sausage. mushrooms. and black coffee and orange juice.. which is... okay variety#augh... so difficult.. As my Ideal Breakfast is like a buffet type thing or something where you have like 25 different things to choose fro#and can get a little tiny bit of everything. My eating style is very much like.. I'd rather pick at a small amount of a ton of#different things than just have a very large amount of only one or two things. Thats why I LOVE sample platter type stuff.#So it's like... augh... the ideal option would be a tiny portion of EVERYTHING actually lol...#Difficult to choose...#ANYWAY.. Also no idea why I added croissant instead of bagel. I only thought about that afterwards. I do actually like bagels.#I've only ever even had a croissant like 2 times in my entire life. Yet I've had many bagels. For some reason it stuck out in my mind more#when I was considering 'essential breakfast foods' somehow... how could I forget them... bagels my beloved...#Blame it on the hot weather... 'What in the blazes? The sun hath obliterated the concept of bagels from my miind!'#(< meant to be said in a silly overdramatic elderly wizard accent or something)#Also I don't think ''bowl of beans. onion. avocado. and tomatos.'' is necessarily a breakfast classic or something gbhjjh#but I was just trying to think of a versatile vegetable-ish side that could be full of common breakfast additions#so people could do stuff like ''oh I get the toast option and then the bowl of stuff and I put the avocado on the toast'' etc.#Like a mix and match. You could mix ingredients from different parts. You could put scrambled eggs and bacon and onion#on the bread or soemthing. etc. I just feel like something is always missing if a Full Breakfast Spread#doesnt have some sort of onions or beans or mushrooms or asparagus or spinach like... some sort of thing that isn't just eggs and meat and#bread.. you know? lol..#But then again.. I am the Sampling Plate Style Variety Lover and Tiny Portion Of Food Picker so maybe thats just a me thing.
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Lacey’s Diner is clearly a metaphor for prostitution/sex trafficking and how victims of sex trafficking are often abused and exploited by customers and the industries they work for alike to the point where many of them get addicted to drugs and take their own lives in this essay I will
#it would explain why a used condom as well as drugs were found in the ‘food’ she served to her customers#likely because she was drugged up before/while having sex with them/shooting scenes#and this is also why she hates her customers because she is constantly being raped by them without any care for how she would feel while#they complain about her body all the while#i believe that she ran away from her uncle after he abused her only to be kidnapped and end up in the sex industry#can you tell that lacey’s diner terrified me the MOST out of all the videos#i think i just made this game even more horrific for everyone#sweet dreams#no cuz the more i think about it the more it makes sense it just makes too much sense for it not to be the case#granted every interpretation is different and valid but still ajdjajdns#lacey games#my post#tw sex trafficking#tw rape
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jade being an example of how quickly the child sidekick idea can devolve into complete weaponization of a child and how that experience carries into adulthood is one of the reasons why she is a great narrative foil for the titans, particularly the fab five.
none of the fab five's mentors are perfect parents and/or teachers. each of them have made mistakes that have hurt their children but, at the end of the day, they love and care about them, and they are also fundamentally good people who want to see good in the world. meanwhile, wen chang saw a little girl whose goal was to survive by any means necessary and was terrified of being forced back into the life she escaped. instead of nurturing her and helping her to overcome her fear, he manipulated her and dehumanized her. wen might claim that he loves her but that "love" is warped because he feels as though her created her (cheshire, rather). anything or anyone who reminds her that she is, in fact, a person capable of emotion and all the things that come with humanity is a threat to his "creation".
#💭#jade nguyen#if jade had better options at that age (or at any age for that matter)#she would not be in the situation she is today#but it was either go with wen and have food clothes shelter etc#or continue to go at it alone knowing that not even staying alive was guaranteed#roy knows this and that's why he'll never write her off as evil or beyond saving#obviously the nature of her interactions w/ the other titans is very different#but i think if they knew the story behind 'cheshire' and why she is the way that she is#i think they would begin to understand her more and why roy fights for her sm#apart from her being the mother of his kid lol
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i am severely upset at the sexyman polls for this year. yeah its absolutely because im biased and not a single one of the mtt won. but killer vs error is still going on you say!!! NO,,,,, killer's lost,,,,, its 70 error 30 killerISH so yeah,,,,, none of the mtt MADE!!!! IT!!!! and with the boom in killer content these past few months i wasSO FUCKING SURE that he'd like AT LEAST get higher up. nope. because of ERROR. listen i like him. he was my og bias when i first joined this fandom. i was an error fanatic. but bro,,,,, bro,,,,,,,,, killer,,,,, lost,,,,,, AND FUCKING HORROR AND DUST LOST TOO!!!! LIKE WHAY. WHAT. PUTTING HORROT AGAINST ERROR AND DUST AGAINST CROSS!!!! THEYRE LITERALLY BOTH THE TWO GUYS THAT (1/2 of them) WON LAAT YEAR!!!! OF COURSE THEYRE GONNA BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THE MTT!!!!! this is very upseting im really sad imMAD. but no point in being a sore loser.... mtt won in my HEART 🧡
dust laughing at both horror and killer for getting the shit beaten out of them by error and then they bring up the fact that he lost to CROSS. this is the second time someone in the mtt lost to cross (theyre all making out in the loser's room) (mtt poly real btw)
#sexyman polls but instead its all just mtt and peoples' aus and varients#i COULD NOT be able to vote. it would be hell for me WHO WOULD I CHOOSE#i CAN'T choose dude i literally wouldn't be able to at all#do i vote for og mtt my pookies??? or jk mtt my besties???? or mst my children????? WHO DO I VOTE FOR#i think i would be biased to the murder swap trio. i haven't mad any content for them at all but like#i spent my TIME and EFFORT into them. and they are cool ngl i really like their concepts#too bad swapinverse isnt seeing the light of day until goddamn 2026 or something because i cant be bothered to make content of it#oops! savior mania paranoia you guys are JUST FOR ME. just me only! nobody else gets to see you guys#or literally anyone else in swapinverse.... i love swapinverse.#they need to make the tag limit like 60 or something i have too many thoughts#quite a few too many times on my posts have i hit the limit and then had to choose#my tags trembling in fear as i pick and choose which to delete in order to make space for the fandom tags#tricule rant#i still have more tags time toRAMBLE!!! i love the idea of dust and horror having opposite ish souls#like dust's soul is PACKED with magic. like crackling and sparking and glowing purple with just how much he has in there bc of his LV stuff#i dont believe in the idea that dust suffers physically from LV or whatever because like. when has that EVER happened#its a cool idea though and i get to pick and choose which headcanons i believe in as god of these fictional characters and creations#anyways OBVIOUSLY horror's soul is dim and shriveled and looks like a fucking dead leaf. because lack of food lack of magic#even though he very clearly DOES have a lot of magic and shows it multiple times in horrortale.....#ok triglycercule you keep contradicting yourself. stop it. BUT THERES TOO MANY MTT HCS OUT THERE!!! AND SOME OF THIS IS CANON!!!!!#god the mttverse is gonna kill me one day too many interpretations TOO MANY CHOICES#anyways i just like that soul idea bc of the contrast. dust too much magic horror not enough. horrordust real#and then killer pulls up with his yn main character ass unique soul with stages#the GET OUT sound effect plays. anyways they all love eachothers souls and unique differences in them#everyday im reminded of the fact that killer is a little. just an EENSY bit more of a special character that horror or dust#he has too much shit going on someone assassinate him. preferably two fellas with names starting with H and D alternatively M#i love coming up with various sayings to kill/shut myself up. someone sedate me#i just remembered this dream where i say to my friend i hope ___ gets into a sticky situation#and then ___ goes into a bathroom comes out and then someone else says ___ WHY ARE YOU ALL STICKY#it was so funny i laughed myself awake. it was SO funny. i saw this person in school today
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i love being trans and bisexual. it scares me thinking of a world where i'm not trans and bisexual
#sorry to get sad and existential in the tags. don't read any further if stuff like that will freak you out#but this is one of many many many reasons why the idea of reincarnation actually scares me and makes me like. depressed#i don't wanna be anyone else. even if i don't know that i was anyone else before. would it be better or worse not to know ?#i don't wanna not be trans. i don't wanna not be bisexual. i don't wanna not like the same food and music. i don't wanna dress differently#i don't wanna not like cats and slugs and snails and horses. i don't wanna have different beliefs. i don't wanna not love the same ppl#i don't wanna be anyone but me. even if being me really sucks and hurts sometimes. a lot of the time#i don't wanna wake up one day and not be me and never know that i existed. to me that's scarier than there being nothing after death
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Gencon is very busy...!!!
Ummmmm highlights of the day..!!!
I maybe bought 4 Naruto figurines. Thankfully not individually expensive (though perhaps a little expensive all together...) see I wanted Sasuke but I also wanted Kakashi and I couldn't have Sasuke without Naruto and well it would feel wrong to have the 3 of them without Sakura and so I somehow. Got all 4. Haha. I'll most likely post pics later, whenever I end up opening them. I'm still at the convention center rn lol
(Putting the rest of this under a cut bc it got a little long lol)
I was on the field of the Lucas Oil Stadium, aka the stadium that the Indianapolis Colts play at. I've attended all of One game here (not professional football, it was a high school game lol) so I've felt the size of it, but it's still fucking crazy being on the field. It's so BIG...... and obviously they've got the grass covered rn, but it's still pretty cool!!!
I maaaade dice!!! Pretty precise process it seems, & definitely would require a Lot of work (after the sanding and the painting etc etc). I do still wanna get into it, but if I wanted to spring for stuff like the vacuum chamber or the pressure pot...
Yeah, it'd get expensive. Add in the fact that I don't have a good place to do this away from the cats & it really is not feasible to start rn. But!!! Eventually!!!! I think I'd really enjoy it. I just need a dedicated workshop space where I can spread out without worrying about poisoning my cats lol.
Here's some cool game set stuff I saw in the event hall. This picture is maybe... hm... a fourth of the event hall? And then when you consider that the vender hall (connected to the event hall, though it's closed right now) is maybe 1.5 times as big as the event hall?? Give or take a little...
Aka just imagine booths upon booths upon booths... I'm gonna have to take a pic of it tomorrow. I was there too briefly to think about taking a pic. Honestly I maybe managed to get through like a tenth of the whole vender hall in an hour of wandering. It's fucking huge. And So Many Dice... I bought one set of 14 (I think it was) dice. Aka an extended set. And then I got a random set bag of dice (just a basic 7). And then a d20 with a cat on it. And a dice of LETTERS. Aka I guess a d26 (I totally did not have to double check that there were 26 letters in the alphabet)(I have 702k words written & posted to ao3)(😂😂😂 I'm very tired) but with letters instead of numbers. And it's glow in the dark!!! And I found some hxh buttons, and a mighty nein poster, and uhmmmm. A cute lanyard. And that's all I bought. Which really is such restraint for me. (Omfg I just saw a dragon cosplay)(someone just dressed as a dragon)
OH YEAH I saw a fucking. Persona 5 Ryuji cosplay. Hanging out with the biker lady from Durarara. Featuring the Ryuji holding her scythe hfksbfmd which was such a funny image. I was too shy to ask for a pic but just trust 🙏 i saw this
Anyways yeah the only real big thing I bought is the naruto figurines. I'll show pics later once I got the stuff again (I dropped it all off in the car earlier)
Omfg literally as I've been sitting here (on a bench at the side of a main hallway) someone stopped by and gave me a handmade bracelet !!!
DND's 50th anniversary!!! So cute!!!!
#speculation nation#not Too much anime stuff. tho i clearly found some stuff. no trigun yet unfortunately 😔#which i already walked thru the artist area (as much as i could)(i was getting a little stressed by how crowded it was)#so idk maybe i missed a booth or smth but it'd definitely be less likely to see elsewhere in the vender's hall#but WHO KNOWS it's a wonderful massive world in there.#im actually sitting outside it rn and staring longingly at the closed doors. tomorrow... i will be able to Actually peruse it more...#and i will quite possibly wear some ear plugs next time bcus i was getting Stressed Out!!! overstimulated!!!!#pulled in a million different directions!!!!! aaaaaaa!!!!#anyways yeah my events are all done for the night. just kinda hanging out now waiting for my sister's game to be done.#gonna collapse into bed as soon as we get back. so i should probably eat some more.#i had an overpriced and underwhelming sandwich. but there is pizza somewhere. maybe i should eat pizza.#i actually... still have the keys lol. from when i dropped the stuff off at the car earlier.#which is weird. I have the ticket to home with me. but i still wait. bc it would be a dick move to leave with them lol#and also. while i Can drive. i do not have my license. so that would be. a bad. idea.#my shoulders Huuuuurt but thankfully i dont have any combat classes tomorrow#hurting shoulders is more just from my bag bc my shoulders fucking suck. but it makes me glad i can rest more tomorrow.#oh yeah i did the sword knife and longsword today. might get bruises from that knife one. it was very focused on parrying#swords. swords. swords. swords. the longsword class made me really want to own a longsword. i dont own one. yet.#i could. i could. i could. sometime. eventually. i want a longsword. i think i technically just own uhmmm um um#a rapier? a machete? a uh. i dont know what that cheap anime convention sword is actually. OH YEA AND CANE SWORD#no longsword though. i really want to own a katana too. someday i'll own both. someday.#real swords are unfortunatelly really expensive. thats why i only have uh. uh. uhhh. oh yeah i do have those 2 swords from mountains trip#i dont really know what those are either. you know i really should know what bladed weapons i own. i dont though.#i own cool swords and knives bc oooh fun pointy things! wheeeeee!!!#i'll study up on it later. lol.#anyways i guess i should go look for more food. i have rambled enough. bye!
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hey question why is mac n cheese so addicting to eat send post
#i need to comfort myself today bc things are stressful and i just wanna be comfy#and mac n cheese felt comfy to eat#and i'm fuckin. shoveling it in. without even meaning to#i keep thinking back to college times when i had barely any money for food and i would get these 40c boxes of mac n cheese#cuz like that's a wild price and you bet your ass i'm gonna at least try it#and dude. i would eat the fuck out of that shit Instantaneously#obviously it's the cheapest stuff on the planet so like it's not like it was outrageously delicious. it was just addictive. it was my Crack#idk if i can get it here now and i don't need to budget myself like that anymore but like. man. that shit hit Different#i never did a drug in college but. man. that would probably be one of the best foods to be high with#moral of the story: i fuckin love mac n cheese. it has no right to be as good as it is. why am i like this
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"i thought you said you'd make an effort" MOTHERFUCKER THIS IS ONLY COMPLAINT #1 OUT OF A VERY LONG LIST JUST BE GRATEFUL I CAN WAIT UNTIL THE GUESTS ARE GONE TO SNAP
#YEAH I MAKE AN EFFORT THATS WHY I ONLY COMPLAIN ABOUT THE STUFF I REALLY CANNOT DEAL WITH LONGTERM#god#it's just#incredibly annoying how my mom just goes OUT OF HER WAY to shrink the scope again when i just explained to her what would work#''so you can't speak up and if we do nothing it doesn't work'' yeah no shit then speak up YOU then. like i just said you probably should#i mean. you did say you don't control what guests bring. BUT YES YOU DO#yes you can speak to them about it#you can discuss and make it less systematic#you can express your thoughts#so you actually just lie to sympathize with me but you don't give a shit#and yet you still act like you tried everything like you just don't know what else could be done#i told you what was my problem i told you what would make it better#say you have other priorities#say you expect me to make an effort and not to be the fucking freak i was my whole childhood#that you were kind enough to tolerate most of the time#even though i was sooooo fucking weird when you knew i had problems but couldn't categorize them so why would i need to do things different#say you don't understand why i hurts me if i can ''try to make an effort''#sorry the only kind of family reunion we have is food-based and i can't try and have good relationships w my family if i dont can it#and eat whatever's in front of me so that they can be happy i'm finally normal and grown up#god jesus christ#yeah it IS your house and i don't get to veto or force anything#dont act surprised when your smart plan for dealing with difficult things is expect your kid to shut the fuck up about any problem they hav#and then huh. weird. your kid isn't happy.#i try to foster a good relationship holy shit#i try to go past the things i don't like and compromise and engage w them#how is that not doing my best#i'm sorry i don't feel great when difficult things happen and also i can't control any of it#when you can and you've also shown me many time i can't expect actually meaningful support from you#broadcasting my misery#vent
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will my mum ever understand that i don’t like talking (as in it’s really physically difficult) sometimes, especially in the morning, and not get upset with me and make me feel guilty about it despite telling her countless times that this is why? 😃
i just vented in the tags sorry bout that :S
#i wouldn’t say non verbal but pretty close#it’s the same with everything#she just doesn’t understand at all and it’s so draining :/#she constantly makes me feel bad for trying to set boundaries so i just give up#like no i genuinely can’t do some things without help no matter how many times you explain it to me i’m sorry?#no i don’t like that food because the texture makes me want to rip my hair out#i want to try different foods i just have bad anxiety about it and you making comments about it doesn’t help#yes i do need to have headphones or earplugs in most of the time bc sometimes it’s unbearable not to#yes i want to spend time alone in my room bc a) it’s a normal thing to do and b) it’s the one place where i can just be myself n not mask#no i’m not ignoring you you actually just interrupted a conversation i was having with my friends#‘i wish you would talk to me more about things’ I WONDER WHY I DONT#and i can’t even say any of this to her because she’d just cry and tell me what a bad mother she is#like… yea exactly#don’t even get me started on queer stuff#yknow i came out two years ago as not straight#and she hasn’t said a single thing about it since#not even vaguely supportive#i can’t even remember if she told me she still loves me#she said ‘i don’t know what to say’ and left me sobbing by myself#i have to censor myself around them bc i still don’t know how they feel about it#the worst part of it is that i convince myself she isn’t that bad so i just forgive her#and never do anything about it#even now i’m thinking ‘ yea but she genuinely isn’t that badi’ 🤡#i want to leave so bad or at least not be in the same house#but i’m not financially independent yet#and i genuinely don’t know if i could cope living on my own#:’D#just gotta deal with it for now#thank god for this safe space 🙏 love u guys#about the only thing keeping me (partially) sane atm
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every time i listen to ugly death no redemption i go fucking insane about ice the last generation again
#sucks bc it’s one of my favorite albums lmao#for those who don’t know. ice is a really shitty post apocalyptic yuri ova#it’s made by the creator of the zeta gundam not like tomino but the mech designer#it’s also really anti men like there’s no men they all died and it’s between the two factions of like militant science and fuck it we ball#and the fuck it we ball people just have gay sex and do drugs#the militant one also has gay sex but only the leader and she has like slaves for it????#also the leader of the fuck it we ball one is part jellyfish bc her mom did genetic experiments on her to figure out how to make children#without cock#that’s one of my favorite parts of it the one scene where that’s discussed is really cool#there’s a weird age gap between the two love interests though i think they’re both adults????#but one of them was like at least in her twenties when the other one was being born??????#it makes me really uncomfortable which is why i haven’t gotten super into it otherwise i think i would go insane#also there’s some weird time travel esque stuff at the end and i think it might be implied that the love interest gave birth to her partner#through virgin birth like jesus style#before any of the plot even happened#or maybe the love interest is just there when she’s giving birth???? she dies in the main timeline and then her object that she gave her#partner is in the hospital room (in the past)#but also the person giving birth is technically different than the love interest bc all we know is that she has been hallucinating this lady#bc she hasn’t slept in literal years#and that’s the lady giving birth in the past and she might be the love interest and she might be giving birth to her partner#fucking insane shit there are parts that really interest me and i want to take for my own projects and stuff#do not recommend it at all but also i kinda do but like dont go into it seriously go into it to see a weird as fuck shit show#anyways ugly death no redemption uses a lot of samples from it!!!!!!#oh yeah humans have also evolved to only be able to eat processed foods and if animals eat it they turn into flowers that’s a cool scene too
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to everyone here 25+ how do you do it? how do you live? and continue living? how do you handle it? going to work, daily hygiene, eating, proper health practices, social interaction, going outside, maintaining relationships. how do you do it?! how do you live?!? please tell me i can’t figure it out and i’m going insane. someone please just tell me what to do.
#i do everything that i’m supposed to yet i still feel the#exact#same#i cant even handle having a simple food industry job#i legit had a full blown break down in front of my boss just now because of how mentally ill i am and can’t handle it#he wasn’t mad he was understanding and gave me the weak off despite me saying i want to quit#but i’ve only had that job for a few weeks now…#even my own father said how am i going to survive in this world if i can’t handle anything?!#why don’t people understand how hard it is for me?!??!#i take all the advice my therapist and doctors say#but i still can’t get better#why won’t i feel any different?#am i really just a lost cause?#i don’t want to end up homeless#what’s wrong with me#i just want someone to give me an answer#just someone tell me what to do#i need to be told what to do or else i don’t know how to be a person#agoraphobia is ruining me#i wish someone would just hold my hand
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i feel like more people need to realize we are all share the same sky and none of us are truly ever alone
#sorry im just htinking about how happy i am how better i am how i take showers now and have friends how I'm nice to my dad and I'm able to#hug him but still talk to my mother i have food and water and blankets i have friends and i am loved changes are scary and I'm still scared#but i remember how happy i am how younger me or even me from a week or month ago or years ago would be proud and still root for me to live#one day ill have a house of my own a life of my own memories to share and love but new ones to experience and in all of them i was never#alone i always had someone to love me and live for i always had a purpose I've had one since i was born which was to be my sisters friend a#and be someone to lean on and i still uphold that i try to support everyone i can since i know how hard it is to not be at the worst times#i hug and tell everyone i love them 24/7 i tell everyone they are amazing since i never know when ill look back on this all and regret not#saying it everytime i hug my dad and he says calm down kylie i always say you'll miss this in 10 years as a joke but i think about it so mu#so much i dont know if ill know any of you in 10 years but I'm happy to be talking to you now I'm happy to know that there's people out the#there who are kind and have fun thoughts who makea fun silly art and chat with me and care about me and try to help me and ill never see yo#why do i have a voice in my head and think about t you all the time when i don't even know you? its crazy but i love it so much you all ha#have watched me grow and change watch me get older and my hair grow longer watch me be happy and i think about that how i might be in your#brain or memories at one point how i have a impact just like how everyone has an impact on me what I'm saying is that no one is ever truly#alone everyone is filled with love and memories to share everyone has a different view on the world and no one truly has the same and i thi#think thats just so special and i get to see it! i get to talk to people everyday and listen and learn and its so special
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you know what would’ve made season 9 like a million times better. if they kept the grogar twist but it turned out discord’s intentions were to reform the villains along with trying to help boost twilight’s confidence LOL
#horseposting#im not the first person to say this#it’s been discussed before#but after watching the frenemies episode i#*WHOLLY stand by this#why would discord send them off to work together for any reason but to make them like each other. you know.#because he didn’t WANT THEM to win. be a challenge for twi absolutely but not BEAT her#and given that the entire message of the show revolves around friendship and harmony#and the last season revolves around unity. idk#the ending feels a bit harsh now 😬 granted the villains ended up being REALLY dangerous by the end but.#i still wish things were handled differently#even if they still ended up being big threats i like the idea of them being exiled together rather than turned to stone#i can see why discord did it in the heat in the moment but given that he was stuck as a statue for a whole millennium#i just. idk he’s selfish but is he really so selfish that he wouldn’t empathize at all?#especially once the dust had settled#just food 4 thot
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sigh
#also this is why these are the times that get me thinking about getting tested for autism again#because i seemingly cannot deal with any new social sitchies#because even thought technically i know that the museum trip itself would probably be chill the stuff surrounding it makes me ill#cause its over two days in a different city which in theory is fine but looking for a place to stay and having to like organize food#and getting there in the first place. and id still have to do a presentation for it#and some other stuff i procrastinated over this term so i could then write the paper and finish the module but i kind of already fucked it#by not attending another seminar id need to finish the module. because i forgot about it until later in the semester and then id have had to#email people and i couldnt? do it? apparently.#and then i get fixated on stupid shit for days on end and cant make myself think about anything else instead of doing uni work#but to circle back in my heart i actually know im not autistic. its perhaps something else or im just organically overwhelmed by being alive#and like i am really embarrassed by considering an autism assessment. online brained and not proud of it lmao#im sure theres typos in this please ignore. also if my sentences dont make sense im only half awake#pax posts
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#truly tired of the way my parents arguing has evolver. congrats theres no more violence but now you constantly have arguments everywhere#about everything#because they talk like everything is a competition and its just passive aggressive comments!#truly thinking about running away and just disappearing for a while but i know that would not change a thing! bc thats how stupid they are#one day theyll be old and under my care and ill hire people to argue 24/7 on my house so that they can understand what it feels like!#its like having the most annoying song on loop ever since you were born! and it won't stop#it will only get annoying remixes#im this old and single and they don't even wonder why... bc im tired of putting up with other people. im always putting up with them!#like arguing about who is the most unhealthy and continuing to still be unhealthy... none of you is winning the argument! bc youll both end#up sick in a hospital#yet u have to hear these stupid arguments!#and about how the house is filled with clutter#if youre not going to change it. stop complaining!!!!!#youre just making it worse for others because now i have to put up with your noise and nonsese and the house is still a mess!!!!#i know sometimes im being dramatic about the whole thing but like brain totally turns into mush especially when i haven't had any food#and ive already heard 3 different passive aggressive comments and arguments#and my dad always acting like he ends up being the bad guy.... maybe if you had actually been a dad during my formative years things would#be different. its not normal for a kid to think their dad has a secret 2 family bc he spends time away just to have fun#dont complain now that i got more attached to my other parent
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