#why she was so skinny in the movies i have no idea! nonetheless

[1000dactyls]

a random assortment of httyd drawings i’ve collected in the past couple of weeks…. B) maggotfig is my httyd oc who is a very good viking boy who dreams of not very viking appropriate things, like what the best kenning for a zippleback’s teeth might be. his right eye is covered because it causes him a lot of pain and is hyper-sensitive when exposed to light, leading to a lot of migraines. it’s a good thing gormworm (or “gormy”) guards his blindspot…

[celestial-fucking-weeb]

Anonymity be Damned

Hi, everyone! This is my first ever fic, and it’s a part of the Citrus Server collab! I’m so excited about it, and I know it’s super self indulgent, but I worked really hard on it and I hope you like it. Please give me feedback and tell me what you like and what I can improve on; also, please be nice to me, I’m a baby.

MASTER LIST IS  HERE  Go check out everyone’s hard work!

Warnings: 18+ minors do not interact, AGED UP (mid twenties), fluff, brief angst, insecurities, smut, body worship, chubby kink, marking (hickies), Papi kink

Pairing: Sero Hanta x chubby!female reader

Taglist: @reinawritesbnha

Prompt: "Masquerade balls were something you’d only ever heard about in movies. You couldn’t deny the prospect was intriguing; donning your most elegant attire, confidence boosted by your anonymity and the intoxication brought on by such a magical atmosphere. You and your fellow partygoers were almost doomed to desire, inhibitions washed away long before the wine and spirits started to flow.

The mystery, majesty, and potential for mischief were far too enticing to resist.

So, when you received an invitation to Midnight’s Masquerade, you didn’t think twice about accepting…"

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Of course, not thinking twice about accepting came back to bite you as soon as the realization set in that you would, in fact, have to go. Suddenly hyper-aware of your need to buy a dress, and knowing how little you enjoy shopping, you call your best girls for the job. A quick text to the groupchat had Mina and Yaomomo screaming with excitement that you were actually asking to go shopping. Jirou and Ochako sharing your apprehension, and Hagakure and Froppy bowing out due to their schedules, but wishing you luck with sweet emojis.

Yaomomo chose the dress shop, under the enthusiastic offer that she’d pay to ensure everyone would receive something from her favorite designers. You knew this was a place only Yaomomo could frequent- beautiful gowns lined every wall, display mannequins donning the most gorgeous dresses, made of the best fabrics with jewels perfectly beaded in, none of which had price tags so as to not “ruin the material” as she had told all of you. Whisking you all into dressing rooms bigger than your entire apartment, the staff practically fawned over each of you, offering assistance, refreshments, recommendations, and- oh fuck- measurements. Nerves shot through your entire body and made you nauseous, ready to make a stupid excuse to leave before your insecurities were announced to your girlfriends. You’ve always been...bigger.

The word tasted bitter on your tongue. The consultant made barely a sound as she pulled out her tape, but you heard it. That little “hm” noise, indicating judgement, knowing that most of their stock isn’t going to fit you properly, what with your plump thighs, soft tummy, squishy arms, the rolls that seemed to stay no matter how many workouts you do..

“We don’t carry plus size gowns, but I’m sure I can find something for you.”

All is confirmed when she says those stupid fucking words with that Joker-esqe smile and that hint of disgust in her tone. ‘I shouldn’t be here, I never should’ve accepted that invitation, why did I even think this was a good idea, the whole thing is for beautiful skinny girls like your friends, this is all a mistake,’ you think to yourself, insecurities and anxiety flooding your brain. Mina’s voice snaps you out of your spiral.

“Excuse me, I don’t believe we asked for your personal opinion on her body. In fact, I believe we only asked for you to do your job, but if you can’t complete such a daunting task, I’m sure there are 20 other people who’d love to take your place.” she grinned, in a tone too perky for her threatening choice of words.

“Also, as I happen to frequent this shop, I know your entire inventory. As such, I know that you do, in fact, carry gowns for each of our sizes. If you can find one to fit my chest, I know you have a variety of gowns to fit my beautiful friend, y/n. I suggest you begin pulling them, as I’m sure you’ve gotten the measurements you need. Now.” This time it’s Yaomomo, handling the situation with dignitary-level finality, before gracefully walking to you with a comforting smile. Ochako wipes a tear you weren’t aware had fallen, attempting to comfort you with false empathy, saying how you two are “practically the same size”, but you know you’re not. It’s comforting nonetheless, having the support of your friend group. Jirou cracks self deprecating jokes to lighten the mood, complaining, “If I have to wear a frilly gown to this bullshit, so do you, y/n. You’re not getting out of this that easy,” and you absolutely know she means it.  

With your spirit slightly renewed and the consultants carrying in a multitude of dresses, you all end up having a blast laughing about how the pink ballgown does not fit Jirou’s aesthetic and the skintight green satin number Ochako tried on would quite literally have Deku passed out on the floor. You giggled with Yaomomo about how certain dresses looked risqué and nearly pornographic on your respective figures. Mina whined about how each dress didn’t have enough glitter, her complaints falling on deaf ears. Over the course of two and a half hours, each of the girls had secured a dress. Mina, in a teal mermaid-style dress with enough sparkle woven into the tulle to blind. Jirou, in a simple deep purple velvet gown that gracefully fell off her shoulders. Ochako, deciding, after much peer pressure, to opt for the green satin to make Deku drool. Yaomomo, in a red gown with beautiful beading, and a deep V neckline. You, on the other hand, were struggling to find something that doesn’t have you hyperfixating on one aspect of your body or another, limiting your breathing and movement so as to not further sink into the mean thoughts swirling around inside your head. The girls have gone into full support staff-mode, bringing you dresses of every cut known to man, offering more champagne to dull the anxieties, Yaomomo even offering to make you a custom dress with her quirk. Jirou sheepishly comes into the room, head down, hoping no one brings attention to the fact that she just sifted through dresses for a good 15 minutes and didn’t hate it, before nudging your soft side. You turn to her, defeated, and ready to give up, when you realize what she’s holding. She’s picked a dress for you, even though she hates shopping anywhere that isn’t blaring music through the speakers and dimly lit. You smile sweetly at her shy offering, reaching out to take it before she pulls back.

“No, I have an idea… I know it’s easy to look at your insecurities before the dress is all the way on, and I think you should let us help you into it with your eyes closed… Then, when you turn around to the mirror, you can see all the beautiful parts, like we do!” She looks down at the floor as she mutters the words, as though she’s embarrassed to be so soft and sweet.

“THAT’S A GREAT IDEA, JIROU! OH MY GOD, Y/N, YOU HAVE TO LET US DRESS YOU, IT’LL BE JUST LIKE CINDERELLA WITH THE BIRDS AND THE MICE, COME ONNN…” Mina bounces up and down, grabbing your hands and pleading, knowing you never say no when she gives you such excited eyes.

“Uh… fine… Yeah, I guess it couldn’t hurt. It’s not like I have anything to lose.” You shyly whisper, looking away.

If it were anyone else, you’d never want them to see you getting dressed, soft tummy and extra squish uncovered, leaving you vulnerable to their judgement. But these are your best friends, you’d known them for years. They’d held your hair on your 21st birthday, and cuddled into bed with you when you were crying over unrequited love. They’ve had your back, they’d never make fun of you, and Jirou chose this dress all special for you, you couldn’t say no. With that, you turned around and closed your eyes, arms out and waiting for them to help you into whatever Jirou had deemed right for you.

“Okay, y/n, almost done, just have to zip this last part up and… DONE!” Mina and Yaomomo stepped back from their positions holding the sides and pulling the zipper, respectively. Finally admiring the you in the dress, there was a moment of absolute silence. You started shifting uncomfortably, wondering just how horrible you looked if they didn’t even have words to describe it. Ochako was the first to break the quiet and a teary-sounding “You’re so beautiful, y/n.”, followed by Mina’s signature squeals of excitement. Yaomomo clasped her hands together and began ranting about “how gorgeous you looked” and “how perfect the dress was” and “how she didn’t even know they had this one yet”. Jirou, sensing your anxious shifting, finally told you to open your eyes and turn around with a hand on your shoulder, the satisfied smirk on her face audible in her now assured voice.

“Oh… wow…” was all you could manage to say, eyes wide as you saw yourself in the full length mirror. This was, in all honesty, the first time you felt beautiful in years. The dress did nothing to hide your body- no- it somehow managed to accentuate every single curve in the most beautiful way possible. The gown was black, made from silk and taffeta, with some built in structure, and oh so soft. Simultaneously comfortable, secure, and elegant, the strapless gown mimicked a one shoulder, right side jutting up in an asymmetrical style and the left dipping just low enough to show your cleavage before cascading down your curves, hugging each roll of your body gently, showing off your figure and flowing down to the floor with a slit up your thigh, only visible when you walked and showing the ample flesh of your hip and thigh. God, it was perfect. You felt strong and classy and sexy and beautiful. Turning to Jirou, you pull her into your chest and hug her, thanking her a thousand times for finding it.

“Whoa, hey, okay… I’m glad you like it, you look absolutely beautiful. But- um- hey, can you let go? I’m suffocating in titties here.” Jirou laughed, genuinely struggling to breathe in your embrace.

“Oh shit, sorry, Jirou! I’m just so happy, I love it so much! I kinda forgot you can’t breathe when I do that…” You chuckle nervously, releasing her from your embrace.

“Yay! Okay, now that everyone has a dress, let’s go purchase them and get some food. I’m starving!” Yaomomo pitches the idea, and everyone agrees, excited to hurry out of the shop for a meal.

_____________________________________________________________

The day had finally come, and your nerves felt fried. The other girls all had dates; Momo and Jirou deciding to go together, Ochako with Deku, even Mina was going with Kaminari. But here you were, riding in the car service alone, makeup absolutely flawless, complete with falsies and red lipstick that was the perfect shade to stand out against your skin. Such a shame no one was going to be benefiting from your efforts tonight, although the thought that your longtime crush, Sero Hanta, would be in attendance was enough to urge you to adjust your carefully placed mask, ensuring your anonymity and polishing your confidence. Sero had been in your friend group since high school, and was the first person you truly warmed up to upon your acceptance into the group. You quickly became the “shy little sister” to the loud ones in the group: Bakugou, Kaminari, Kirishima, and Mina. Jirou and Sero were more your speed; quieter, more laid back and chill, with great senses of humor that not everyone was privy to. With Jirou as your designated best friend, Sero was proclaimed the unrequited love interest. You friendzoned yourself almost immediately, assuming Sero wouldn’t go for a girl like you, not when he was tall, dark, handsome, and muscular. A budding pro hero wouldn’t want you, not with your shy insecurities and soft body…

Little did you know, Sero had been pining after you since the beginning, flirting with you subtly in hopes that you’d express your interest. Eyes wandering down your curves during movie nights, taking in your too-small shorts and how your oversized shirt would raise just enough to see your little tummy pouch, wishing his face was buried between your plump thighs, praying he would be able to leave hickeys on every delicious roll, pleading he could see those cute chubby cheeks covered with tears while your plush lips wrapped around his cock… No- he couldn’t think of you like that. After all, you never returned his flirting, and there’s no way you’d like him when you could crush on manlier guys like Kirishima and Bakugou. ‘He was just a “dollar store Spiderman”, as Bakugou liked to call him, just a guy… Nothing special…’ he thought to himself as he adjusted his own mask in the bathroom mirror at the gala. His friends had all confirmed that you were coming, and that you were coming alone (said by Kaminari while wiggling his eyebrows). Every other person in the group had a date, including Bakugou and Kirishima, who had to practically drag the former to the event in the first place. He was the only one “stagging it”, aside from you, who would no doubt attract attention and end up going home with some flashy hero higher ranked than he was. He sighed, adjusting his tux jacket and cufflinks, and exited into the main ballroom to get a drink.

You walked into the venue, checked in, and stood frozen outside the ballroom entrance. You adjusted your mask, steeled your nerves, and squared your shoulders, reminding yourself how absolutely gorgeous you looked and donning your best “bad bitch” aura. You strut into the place like you own it, suddenly very aware of how many people there are, scanning for familiar faces as you sway your luscious hips to maintain your balance in your heels.

“Holy fuck... “  Sero utters, jaw slack and eyes locked on you. You’re so perfect, breasts bouncing with every step, thighs and tummy jiggling, soft smile gracing your face. He’s staring, and Kaminari has to elbow him to wipe the drool from the side of his mouth before you get there. You’re equally as enchanted, seeing Sero in his black fitted tuxedo, crushed velvet lapels, tapered pants making his quads look positively biteable, crisp white shirt tailored over his pecs, black bowtie (slightly crooked, very fitting of his personality) and mask obscuring his face, leaving him as nothing more than a handsome stranger. A  yellow pocket square catches your attention, reminding you of your favorite hero in his costume. You smirk to yourself, knowing you chose yellow gold heels specifically because they reminded you of him.

“See something you like, Sero-buddy? You’re staring so hard, you’d think she was God.” Kaminari punches Sero in the ribs, trying to break the spell. “Maybe you should talk to her, finally get over your crush on y/n by getting under someone else.” he winks, completely unaware that he’s talking about you in both respects.

“Uh… I don’t know, man. I think I’ll give it a minute, maybe grab another drink and enjoy the party for a while. I’m not trying to start hitting on some random chick just yet, though hot she may be.” Sero laughs, rubbing the back of his neck like he always does when he’s nervous. He diverts his eyes down to his drink, downs the rest of the liquid, then focuses back on you. You wait at the bar for your drink of choice, aware of that beautiful stranger still staring and leaning against the counter just enough to push your ass out. You hear him nearly choke on his drink, and move around the party satisfied with yourself.

A few drinks later, you find yourself on the dance floor, watching from the edge and lightly swaying to the music. A masked man with shaggy black hair, who you can only assume to be pro hero Grand, given his mask barely covered a fourth of his face probably only worn to fit the theme, approached you for a dance, hand extended and bowing at the waist.

“A lady as beautiful as yourself shouldn’t be a wallflower. Care to dance?” he asks, voice low and alluring, looking down at you with a mischievous glint in his deep brown eyes.

“I might…” you smile shyly, taking his hand and letting him lead you.

Once out on the dance floor, he pulls you into his chest with a hand on your lower back. It’s nice to be wanted, to dance so close to a man who finds you beautiful, especially one as chiseled as Grand. ‘Wait- is he…? Are you fucking kidding?’ Your fight or flight response kicks in as soon as you feel his hand drift lower and lower onto your ass. You pull away, ready to ask him what the hell he thinks he’s doing, but before you can get a word out, he puts a hand over your jaw, fingers tightly snapping your mouth closed. Unable to speak and too shocked to move, you feel helpless as he whispers in your ear.

“God, I love fat girls. Your self esteem is so low, I can do whatever I want and you’ll fall for it. So stupid, so fun.” His laugh is so dark, and you start to panic before a large, strong hand reaches between the two of you and wraps around Grand’s throat, yanking him back and off of you.

“Listen, this is a classy place, so I’ll give you a choice. Either you apologize to this absolutely gorgeous woman and get the fuck out of here, or I beat you to a bloody pulp right here and ruin both your suit and your face.” The handsome stranger who had originally caught your eye growls, voice so low and intimidating you didn’t doubt for a second he meant every word. ‘His voice sounds so familiar, but I can’t quite place it. He’s so angry, and he’s speaking so low, I can’t figure out where I’ve heard that before.’  Thankful for his saving assistance, and trying to calm yourself from hyperventilating, you watch Grand’s retreating form before turning to the man who is quite literally your Prince Charming of the evening.

Voice still low and angry, “Listen, I need you to distract me. Calm me down so I don’t turn around and kill that guy.” he seethes. “You are stunning, absolutely gorgeous. He was so wrong. He’s an asshole, absolutely vile, and he never should’ve even had the nerve to approach you, much less touch you. God fucking damn it, I should-”

You cut him off by pulling him close, placing your hands on his chest and letting them roam up to fix his still crooked bowtie.

“Thank you…” you whisper, tearing up as you put your head on his chest. His cologne is so calming, his scent enveloping you as his arms instinctively wrap around you and his hand finds the back of your head, holding you to his chest.

The two of you slow dance in silence, his head resting on top of yours, the scent of your shampoo and hairspray comforting him and taking him to a dream where he was dancing with the y/n he knew, feeling your soft body pressed against him, imagining how you’d look in the dress on the girl he was actually dancing with. ‘Oh fuck, y/n would look so fucking perfect in this. Her curves- fuck, this dress is soft- I would absolutely love to run my hands along her body in this dress, press her up against me like this, fuck her thighs- wait… SHIT-FUCK-NO’  Snapped out of his thoughts by the increasing tightness of his tux pants, he prays to god the sexy girl pressed against him doesn’t notice.

You notice something nudging against your thigh, breaking you out of your daydreams about the mystery man being Sero Hanta, opening your eyes before you realize exactly what you’re feeling. ‘Oh… OH. Holy fuck, did I make him hard just dancing? He- uh- feels… big… Maybe if I just-’  you subtly shift your hips, thigh brushing up against him and slotting between his legs just enough. A deep groan rises from his chest, and he leans down to your ear.

“Babygirl, if you keep doing what I think you’re doing, I’m going to have to return the favor~” His voice sounds so familiar, but the lust clouding the low rumble has it taking on an entirely new timbre. You lean in, feeling emboldened by his words, swiping your tongue along the shell of his ear with a simple “Oh really?~ And what if that’s the goal?”

With that, he crooks his finger under your chin and presses his lips to yours. What starts as a sweet and simple kiss quickly evolves into a deep, passionate kiss that left you breathless. His fingers gently resting on your neck, just above your collarbone, and tongue swiping at your bottom lip. You sigh into him, granting him access and letting his tongue explore your mouth, relishing in his deep rumbles and pressing impossibly closer, hoping he’d get the message and take you somewhere more private. Luckily, it seems he seems to read your body language and leads you to a side hallway by pressing his hand on the small of your back, possessively guiding you. Pushing you up against the wall, he leans back in to resume kissing you, with an arm steadying himself above your head. In a simply embarrassing display of clumsiness, your hand reaching for his cheek goes slightly off course, accidentally knocking off his mask and causing you to fumble to the floor to retrieve it. Upon looking up, you see Sero standing with a flushed face and his hand reaching up to the back of his neck, the endearing nervous tic you’d learned from him over the years. Oh God, if your heart wasn’t beating fast enough before, it sure as fuck was now… The man you had yearned after for years not only swooping in to save you from some low-life creep, but also having you in a kabedon against the wall of the fanciest place you’ve ever been in. He laughs, nervous now without his anonymity, and reaches down to help you up.

“I- uh- sorry, I might’ve gotten carried away. I hope you’re okay, I know I’m probably not the hero you wanted. I really do think you’re beautiful, you actually remind me of someone I know and- wow- I’m rambling…” He goes on like this, panicking that he’s somehow ruined your fantasy and disappointed you by existing. He only shuts up when you stand back upright and kiss him softly.

“You’re exactly the hero I want… The hero I’ve always wanted.” You blush, staring up at him with the most loving doe eyes you can manage.

‘Wait… Her voice… Is that- ?’ Sero came to quite possibly the best and utterly terrifying realization; that the girl he’d been lusting after all night and the girl he’d been wanting for years could be the same girl. He hesitantly brought a hand to your face, lightly grazing your mask as though asking for permission. You nod, never breaking your gaze on his concentrated expression, and parted your lips. He gingerly lifts the mask from your features, damning your anonymity, and each of you hold your breath in anticipation. The way he looks at you is like something out of a movie, or one of those shōjo manga you love to obsess over: pure relief, adoration, lust, love. Oh, you want him to look at you like that forever.

“Y/n, I-... You have no idea how happy I am that it’s you. I have been wanting to kiss you for years, and to finally do it, and with you looking… Wow- you are so fucking stunning, I have never seen anything as beautiful in my life. Fuck, I just- I wish I could tell you how perfect you are, express in words how flawless I’ve always thought you were- still do… “ Sero breathed all of this as though he had to get every word out before you disappeared. He held your face in both hands, lightly squishing your cheeks and stroking his thumb over your lips, taking in your hopelessly enthralled expression. “You know what? Fuck this. No- I mean- not ‘fuck this’, I just… I want to do this right. I want you, I need you. I want to express how important you are, I need to show you that you’re everything to me. I want to worship you, kiss every inch of your body and make you feel so incredibly complete and full and whole and appreciated. Do you understand?”

“Hanta… I- Yes. Yes. Please take me home, I need you. I want you. You’re the only one I’ve ever wanted.” You lean into his touch, wanting to be ever closer to his warmth.

You yelp as he suddenly picks you up, bridal style, as though you don’t even provide a struggle.

“HANTA, you can’t be carrying me, I weigh more than you, no no no, I’m too heavy, you can’t-”

“Y/n. I’m a pro hero, are you seriously telling me I can’t carry you? I can carry 3 people at once while hanging from a strip of tape in midair. I’ll hold you up forever if you’d let me.” He squeezes you in his hold, emphasizing his point.

His cocky attitude was majorly driven by how good you felt, soft tummy and jiggling tits against his torso, the perfect squish of your thighs in his powerful arms, chubby hands and cheeks tucked into his chest and the crook of his neck. He swore he could die happy right there. In the elevator, he took a moment to take in your entire figure, but upon reaching your feet, something turned him absolutely feral. Your shoes. You were wearing his colors. Every single piece of clothing matched his hero costume. ‘Holy shit… You knew. You wanted him before this even happened. You were his.’ The possessive growl that tore from his chest startled you as he adjusted you in his hold. He had your legs wrapped around his waist, hands unapologetically on the ample crux of your thighs and ass, lips on yours in a desperate kiss that was all tongue and teeth, grinding his hard cock against you. You whimpered against his lips, shocked by his sudden change of demeanor.

“Fuck, you’re wearing my colors, aren’t you? You want me to claim you? You want to be mine? I’ll give you anything you want, babygirl. I just need you to ask for it.~” He growled against your neck, nose tracing the column of your throat.

“Hanta, please, yes- ah~. I want to be yours. I only want to be yours. I need you. Please, please, please.” Normally, you’d be way too shy to beg this much, embarrassed about how desperate you sound, but fuck he’s making you so needy. The gasp that escapes you when Sero licks a stripe up your neck turns into a moan when he starts sucking a hickey over your pulsepoint. He feels so good, the heat between your thighs steadily building with every nip of his teeth and roll of his hips. You thread your fingers through the hair on the back of his neck and pull gently, earning a groan and a buck of his hips. He works his way up to your jaw, leaving pretty little marks in his wake, and returns to your lips like a safe haven. He strokes your tongue with his own, committing your taste to memory. He never wants to forget this moment, especially not when you lightly suck his tongue and pull him in further with those perfect fucking thighs. You’re so soft, being wrapped in your plushness with his fingers digging into the pliable flesh of your ass is too much. Sero’s sinful thoughts are interrupted by your fucked-out voice, so small and innocent, as though you’re afraid of his answer.

“Um… Can I- can I touch you? I mean- I- can I mark you, too?” You sound so unsure, not used to someone wanting to show you off.  You’re so breathless, and he’d be lying if the pleading in your voice didn’t make his dick twitch in his pants.

“Awwww~ is my babygirl shy now? You want to mark me, too? Go ahead, mi amor, sí se puede. I’m all yours, just like you’re mine.” Sero cranes his head to the side, baring his neck to you, waiting for you to bless him with those full lips, waiting for you to make a show of him finally having the most perfect girl he’s ever known.

If he could’ve taken a picture of your face in that moment, he’d look at it every day. Squishy cheeks blushing, eyes wide with surprise and excitement, gaze clouded with lust. You were so pretty, he couldn’t wait to ruin you. Sero moaned as you sucked a small dark mark onto his skin and happily carried you from the elevator to his room. You tighten your arms around him when he reaches for his key card, involuntarily pushing your chest together and pressing up into him.

“Oh, mi corazón, if you keep pressing into me like that, voy a tener que lamer cada parte de ti y puede que no te deje ir…” His threats sound more like promises when he’s carrying you through the threshold and placing you down gently, though his hands never leave your body.  Tracing your sides, memorizing your curves, squeezing any part he can get his hands on.  His right hand inches down your torso, resting on the pouch of your tummy and making you flinch. Sero notices and worries he’s hurt you, or that you don’t want him to touch you. The hurt in his eyes is obvious when he takes in your tense muscles and eyes squeezed shut, realizing it’s your own insecurities holding you back. He wishes you could see how beautiful you are, see yourself through his eyes. He was going to make you feel so fucking loved, he just had to show you what he couldn’t express in words. You stripped him of his jacket as he unknotted his tie. With nervous hands, you unbuttoned his shirt and slipped it past his broad shoulders, fingers trailing down his sculpted chest and lean abs, admiring the enticing adonis belt and pretty trail of coarse black hair disappearing into his pants. Sero, with his ego now boosted by the lustful look in your eyes as you took him in, returned your gaze to his face with an intensity that made you shiver. He kept eye contact while sweeping your hair to one side, and slowly unzipping your gown. Your breath hitches in your throat as he leans down to place open mouthed kisses along your shoulders as he pushes your dress down your body, kissing down your arms as it falls, and places a sweet kiss to your hands. Pushing you onto the bed with a soft thud and climbing over top of you, he moves the hands that raise to cover yourself , grasping your wrists in one hand and cupping your cheek with the other, as he softly reassures you.

“Princesa, please don’t hide from me. I’ve waited for you for so long, and I want to worship every inch of you. I’m going to make you cry out my name, and show you just how perfect you are while you cum on my tongue. You will not say a single bad thing about mi amor, you understand?” he says lowly, so loving yet commanding.

“Yes, Hanta… I- I’ll be good for you, I promise.” you whine, praying your submission would please him.

The sound of his given name in that pleading tone has him painfully hard, but he’s too focused on hearing his name from your sweet lips again to care. You pull him down into a passionate kiss and roll your hips against his clothed cock when he laves down your neck and leaves love bites across your chest. He sucks your nipple into his warm mouth and rolls the other between his forefinger and thumb, earning a high pitched keen from you. He switches to give the same attention to the other side, tongue swirling around the peaked bud and relishing the way your chest heaves just from his mouth on your tits. ‘So needy… Fuck, how did I ever wait this long to see y/n like this and hear her sounds?’ Sero thinks to himself, so ready to watch your eyes roll back in your skull the minute you feel his cock fill you. The thought of you bouncing on his dick, watching you jiggle with his thrusts, letting him grip the fat on your hips and help you fuck yourself on him, feeling your lovely thighs straddle him, has him impatiently rutting into the mattress. He needs to taste you, leave marks all over your delicious tummy and thighs, and feel you coming undone beneath him. His large hands slide down your sides, rubbing back up under your breasts, gripping the extra flesh over your ribcage, the soft love handles on your sides, caressing the perfect pouch of your belly and settling on your hips. His mouth follows the path of his hands, kissing and licking every place you had deemed undesirable like they were the sexiest pieces of you, leaving dark hickeys on the front of your hips to remind you that all of these parts were now his to love.

“Lo siento, babygirl, pero no puedo esperar más, necesito mi lengua en ese bonita coño jodidamente ahora. Estas necesitan estar en el suelo ahora.” If his panting growl of Spanish didn’t already have your pussy gushing, his strong fingers ripping your panties and hoes off your body had you dripping onto the bed. Your shocked squeak turning into a moan when he parted your legs and nipped at the soft skin of your inner thigh, Sero is beyond delighted by feeling your beautiful thighs squishing against his face. If he could choose his end, it would undoubtedly be suffocating between this plush heaven. He snaked his arms under your parted thighs to hold your hips, squeezing and marveling at the feeling of your warm body protruding between his spread fingers, trying to fit as much of you in his grasp as he could and never getting enough. You’re just about to plead for him to touch you where you need him most when you lock eyes and hear the teasing lilt in his voice when he groans “Itadakimasu~” and flattens his tongue, licking a long, slow stripe up your slit.

“So wet for me, princesa, is this all for me? You’re so thoughtful to give me a meal so sweet.”

“Hantaaa, please. I want you, please don’t tease me, please touch me. I need- ah~”  

Your begging is interrupted by his tongue diving into your sex, lapping at your slick like a man starved. The moans coming from the man between your thighs were sinful; in this moment, Sero Hanta was no longer the friend you’d watched superhero movies with and silently crushed on for years- he was a man, a lover, all you’d ever wanted. Wrapping his lips around your clit and sucking the sensitive pearl into his mouth, he pulled one hand from your hip and slowly slipped two long fingers into your sopping heat. The callused pads from years of hero training now rubbing perfectly against your walls have you crying out for him and grasping his hair, begging him to go faster. He suddenly props himself up, bringing his palm up to grind against your clit and slowing his thrusts, wanting to hear you beg for him and watch your desperate facial expression.

“What is it you want, babygirl? C’mon, you’re going to have to use that pretty little mouth of yours. Tell me what you want, baby, use your words. I wanna hear you beg for me.” That normally dopey smile was replaced with a lewd smirk, hungry and covered in your juices.

“H-Hanta, please please please. I need you, need your mouth. Please I wanna cum, please let me cum, I want you to fuck me! Please please pleaseeeee~” Hips bucking forward, sweat lightly covering your skin, hair splayed out, body covered in his marks, begging for him… Shit, he’d give you anything you asked for. Oh, he’ll give you what you need- don’t you worry.

“Good girl, such a good girl for me. I’ll make this pretty pussy cum. Hold onto me and just relax, princess.”

His lips returned to your clit, flicking his tongue and sucking lightly, and increased his pace. He curled his fingers just right, finding the spongy underside of your clit and he chuckles darkly to himself when your back arches, head falling back onto the pillows.

“There it is~, there we go, babygirl. Cum for me, just like this. I’ve got you, let go, cum on my fingers.”

It doesn’t take long after his mouth goes back to nursing on your clit and his fingers continuously hitting your g-spot for the coil in your belly to finally snap. You climax hard, eyes screwed shut and screaming out his name as his tongue works you through your high. Once you’ve come down, you open your eyes and see Sero sucking his fingers clean of your release and unbuckling his belt with the other hand. You sit up to kiss him, tasting yourself on his tongue, and unbuttoning his pants. He grows impatient with your pace, shoving his pants and tight boxers down at once. ‘Fuck, his dick is pretty’ you think to yourself, marveling at the masterpiece before you. He’s long, maybe 8.5-9 inches, thick enough to stretch your walls so deliciously but not too thick to fit in your mouth, prominent vein running along the underside and leading from the neat crop of black hair to the leaking tip, begging for your tongue. You start to rise to your knees before being pushed back into the duvet, looking up at him in confusion.

“No, no, mi amor. As much as I want to see your beautiful lips wrapped around my cock, that’s gonna have to wait. I want to be inside you, I need to fuck you until all you can think about is me and how fucking beautiful I think you are.” His eyes are so sincere. He looks down at you with the most loving stare you’ve ever felt, so calm and safe in his presence. You’re lulled into submission, every doubtful argument you had died on your tongue, and a soft moan escaped your lips. He leans over you, bracing himself on an elbow with his hand on your jaw to keep your eyes fixated on him. The other hand wraps around the base of his cock and teases the head along your slit, pressing on your clit just enough to have you squirming, trying to impale yourself.

“So needy for me, so wet. You’re so perfect, babygirl, I wouldn’t want to go too fast now. I want to savor every inch, feel you stretch around me while I watch those e/c eyes roll back in pleasure.” He holds back from thrusting into you when you whine in response, breathing heavy and struggling to get him inside. “Damn, baby, if you’re that desperate, why don’t you tell me exactly what you want? Beg for my cock, mi amor.”

“PLEASE, I need you inside me, please! I need your cock. Please fuck me, Papi~” You gasp out in succession, trying out the name you had once heard Kaminari teasing him about. It was a desperate attempt to get him to move, one your fucked-out brain decided was your best shot at getting him feral. And holy shit were you right. Sero fills you in an instant, hard length thrust to the hilt in your tight hole, causing you to cry out, eyes rolling back just as he promised.

“FUCK!” He’s losing restraint, driven mad by the filthy name coming from your angelic lips. The squeezing and fluttering of your walls is the only thing grounding him to Earth as he smirks down at you, baring his teeth while his other hand comes to wrap around your throat and apply light pressure to the sides. “Oh you know what you’re doing, don’t you? You have no idea how many times I imagined you calling me like that with these soft thighs wrapped around me; trust me, it’s nothing close to how sexy the real thing is. If you want to play dirty, princesa, don’t blame me when you can’t walk tomorrow.”

He backed up his statement with a few deep strokes that had your mouth falling open and eyes unfocusing, still unable to look away from the man about to wreck you. In a weak attempt to ground yourself, you reach up and place your hands on his back to feel the flexing of his muscles as he gave you slow, deep thrusts. Running your hands along his shoulders had your pussy clenching, and the groan pulled from his chest accompanying a harsh increase in his pace had your nails clawing at the corded muscles, causing him to put more force into fucking you into the mattress. A cycle of reactions, spurring the other on to continue and escalate.

“You feel so good, babygirl. S-So tight, you feel like you’re fucking made for me. I love you so much. I love everything about you. God, I fucking love your body- I love your curves, I love your legs wrapped around me, I love your sexy fucking thighs, I love your cute tummy- love how you feel pressed against me, I love running my fingers up your arms and kissing back down, I love gripping your hips when I hold you, I love watching you jiggle when you walk and bounce when I fuck you like this. You’re so fucking beautiful, so perfect for me.” Sero babbles out praises like he’ll die if he doesn’t get them out. You’re a blushing mess, knowing these words are completely true, tumbling out of his mouth unconsciously as he thinks them. “I love that expression, angel. Still so shy at my praises, even though I can feel you trying to milk my cock at every word. Such a good girl for me. Why don’t you tell me who makes this pretty pussy feel so good, huh? Say it, angel.”

“Hantaaa~ you feel so good. Please don’t stop!! I’m so close, please. I wanna cum, I wanna cum on your cock, please Papiiii~. You make me feel so good. I love you, I love you, I’m all yours. Please, I’m yours-ah~, I wanna be yours. I need you, I love you so much. Only you could make me feel like this-fuck- it’s only you. Please make me cum, Papi~” Your moans and pleas are getting louder and louder, chasing your impending climax. Every emotion flowing out of you, combined with the wonderful overstimulation, had tears rolling down your pudgy cheeks. You hadn’t yet realized you were crying when Sero leaned down to kiss and lick away the salty streams.

“Okay, princesa, I’ll give you what you need. How can I say no when you're being so good for me? Such a beautiful mess, all for me. So perfect. My good girl~” His right hand smoothes down your torso and settles between your thighs, rubbing tight circles on your clit. “Come on, babygirl. Papi’s got you, I’ll take good care of you. Cum for Papi. Cum on my cock.”

Your final orgasm has your back arched off the bed, eyes crossed, tongue lolling out, screaming out a string of “Hanta”, “Papi”, and “I love you”. Sero keeps his pace steady, fucking you through your climax and trying to prolong it as long as he can. The feeling of your doughy pussy clamping down around his cock like a vice, the gloriously wrecked ahegao face, and the sound of your cries as you creamed on his dick had him right on the edge of his own high. He started to pull out, not wanting to cross any boundaries, when he felt your legs pull him in even further. He looks back to your face; hazy, loving eyes drawing him in with that innocent look.

“Please cum inside me Papi, I want it! I’m yours, I want you. I want you to fill me up.” The permission to claim his longtime love and the aftershocks of your orgasm having you still pulsing around him finally push him over the edge. He buried his face in the crook of your neck, sucking and biting in a feeble attempt to muffle his moans of your name as his hips stuttered, thick ropes of cum warming your insides and painting your walls white. You feel so full and so content. Staying inside you, Sero rolls the two of you over to lay on his back, still holding your sweaty bodies together as he kisses your forehead and strokes your hair, telling you how good you did, how happy he was, how proud he was of you.

No one has ever made you feel so good, so wanted. Normally, your post-sex thoughts are plagued with insecurities, but instead all yoou can think about is Sero and how perfect this was. How beautiful he made you feel… and how you didn’t want it to end.

“H-Hey… Um… Sero?” you timidly get his attention.

“Y/n, I’m gonna need you to start calling me Hanta if we’re gonna be together. It’s a little weird to call your boyfriend by their family name, isn’t it?… Unless you wanna call me Papi, of course~” He says, his normal goofy grin and teasing tone returned.

“Wait… You- you really want to be with me? You don’t want me to keep it a secret? I will if you tell me to… I don’t want to embarrass you, I know I’m not exactly the ‘trophy wife’ the other heroes go for… I just really like you- um- actually, I’ve been in love with you for years now, and I just got really excited that you wanted me and-” Your nervous muttering is cut off with his lips softly pressed against yours, his hand moving to intertwine your fingers with his.

“Mi amor, I’ve been in love with you for just as long. You are my trophy, the greatest part of me. Every single thing I said is true, and I’ve thought those things for our entire friendship. If you think for a second that I won’t be walking around shirtless, showing off all of these marks to Kirishima and Kaminari, you don’t know me at all.” He winks at you and brings your hand to his lips, placing a gentle kiss there. “Princesa, babygirl, mi corazón… Nunca te dejaré, yo nunca te dejaré salir, yo prometo. I am yours, and you are mine.”

“I love you, Hanta.”

“I love you, too, y/n.”

You fall asleep on his chest to the calming rhythm of his heartbeat and steady breathing. Upon waking up, you assume you had just dreamed the entire affair, chalking it up to your vivid imagination and drinks at the ball. That is, until you realize you’re trapped in a tangle of limbs with Hanta, leg hiked over his body and arms encompassing each other. You try to shift slightly to see his sleeping face, but he stirs and rolls over on top of you with a groan. The jolt of his muscles jerking awake told you he also thought he had dreamed the entire thing, believing that the prospect of your mutual pining actually coming to fruition was too good to be true.

“Good morning, angel. I’m so glad you’re real… And that you’re all mine.” Sero softly sighs, voice rough from sleep, nuzzling his face into your chest and squeezing your soft midsection to hold you closer.

“Good morning, love. I’m so so happy, but there’s one thing…” You say, trying to hold back your giggles.

“What is it, baby? Is something wrong? What did I do?” Sero starts thinking of every possible scenario as you soothe his thoughts with a cheeky smile.

“I- um… I think I need you to carry me to the shower, you weren’t lying when you said I wouldn’t be able to walk in the morning.” Both of you erupt in a fit of laughter. He scoops you up in his arms and carries you to the shower, so content in finally having his girl.

___________________________________________________________

A/N: WHEW okay… I’m actually really proud of this, and I hope you guys like it. The Latin Sero headcanon hits me so hard and I just absolutely simp for this sweet tape boy. Huge thank you to @reinawritesbnha for inspiring me to write this matchup, @lemonlordleah-shinzawa-kitten for encouraging me and giving me the courage to post, and my dear, sweet Sage for reading it to make sure I don’t embarrass myself and inspiring me to write in the first place. <3

[gojos-sidepiece-69]

Tokyo Tech Training- Chapter 4

How was it only Tuesday? You groaned and put your hands over your eyes, slowly sitting up in your bed. You had just had a nice, dreamless sleep: no blindfolds, no stupid jokes, no stupidly moisturized lips (that belonged to a certain man whore) anywhere to be seen. You racked your brain trying to figure out how any of this could have possibly happened within the span of your first four days in the Jujutsu world. The whiplash from the most eventful weekend of your life started to kick in, heavily.

Your feet dangled over the edge of your bed, and you sighed deeply, touching at the bruised flesh on your hips. You pulled the band of your pajama pants down slightly, gaping at the state of your thighs. You couldn’t tell whether the crescent-shaped indents and the violent branding of love bites were from Gojo or...Sukuna. You let out a small laugh at the insanity of the situation.

To your luck and great relief, the higher-ups had ordered a restful “team-bonding” day. From what you had heard, Megumi and Nobara had taken quite the beating as well. Their mission with Nanami to exorcise a certain high-grade curse with patchwork skin proved to be unsuccessful, as the evil thing escaped without a trace into the sewer systems. You pushed your door open and joined your fellow first-years in the hallway. There was a certain comfort in seeing the four of you together, all tired and scarred and bruised, but still smiling nonetheless (except for the ever-deadpanned Megumi). “Hey, I know what we can do today!” Nobara suggested excitedly. “Let’s go movie-hopping!”

Yuji started jumping up and down quickly. “Yes, yes, let’s do it! What movies are they showing today?! Hopefully something with Jennifer Lawrence in it,” he drooled. Megumi rolled his eyes, but nodded. “If I see any curses, though, I’m going to be upset. This was our day to recover.” You agreed with the movie-hopping idea, glad that you could have just one more day to yourselves, doing normal teenager things.

Half an hour later, you met up with your classmates at the front gates of Tokyo Tech, and started on your stroll downtown. “Hey, Y/n, what’s with the limp?” Nobara chuckled as she took in your pathetic attempt to walk straight. “The curse get you that badly?” You nodded at her, sheepishly thinking about how the damage from that curse was the least of your concerns. Yuji immediately patted himself. “Hop on,” he told you, signaling you to jump onto his back. “You want to give me a piggy back ride?” You smiled and teased him; his sincerity and concern was genuine, and it made your heart warmer.

You climbed onto his back and he continued walking as though he was weightless. Damn, you thought enviously. How did he recover so quickly? Yuji animatedly and dramatically described yesterday’s encounter to his friends. He was talking so fast you could barely keep up: “...and there were spikes, and the finger was caged between the teeth, and ... and, then I had to switch with Sukuna or we would’ve died! !! !!! And I can’t remember a thing after that. Oh, did you guys like your Mickey Mouse keychains?” Nobara gushed about how cute the souvenir was, and the two of you discussed how much you loved being in Tokyo. You took in the street vendors around you, the big flashing, neon lights, and the vibrant storefronts. Everything you laid your eyes on was so interesting and new, but couldn’t help but find yourself thinking about the view from above...38 floors above.

You shook your head and tried to forget about him. Why did your mind always have to wander back to him? No, you still didn’t care. “We’re here!!” Yuji shook you out of your intrusive thoughts as he announced your arrival in front of the Toho Cinema. You gaped at the marvelous glass building, serotonin boosting by the minute. “What are we watching?” You asked after you all pushed inside. Of course, it only took a second for the three get into a heated argument about which movie they would see first.

“We’re watching the showing of Back to the Future!” Yuji pouted, and Nobara was quick to yell, “Hell no! The freaky old man scares me!” Then Megumi suggested, “How about Fight Club?” and Nobara stamped her foot. “No violence today. I don’t need to see a skinny Brad Pitt with blood spurting out of his nostrils for two hours straight,” and you nodded in accord. After two more minutes of heated debate, you settled on Fast and Furious, because of its perfect blend of early-2000s tomfoolery, corny dialogue, and sexy (but ridiculous) car chases.

You sat sandwiched between Nobara and Itadori, and made the regrettable decision of holding the food tray in your lap. You could barely hear the furious engines revving over the sound of Yuji and Nobara greedily scooping popcorn and dropping sour gummy worms everywhere. Yuji repeatedly slurped his coke (which he for some reason preferred watered down) at maximum volume. Megumi was intently staring at the screen, and you made eye contact with him a few times and exchanged friendly eye rolls. The four of you exited the theater after the movie, and were about to commence your second round of argument for the next choice when your eyes almost popped out of their sockets. Sukuna’s devilish mouth made an appearance on Yuji’s right cheek. This couldn’t be good.

Before Yuji could slap it away, it spoke. “Y/n has a little secret to tell you guys. Go on, tell them,” he provoked you. The three turned to you, looking slightly confused. “Huh? I-I have no idea what he’s talking about,” you rushed. “Come on, you don’t want them to know how much fun we had together yesterday? Oh, maybe your friends don’t know that side of you yet; surprising, because I could tell just from the redness of your cheeks how much you enjoyed being called a slut. Anyways, if you don’t tell them, I will,” Sukuna’s mouth continued in a bored tone. You went to sharply slap your hand right across Yuji’s face, but his reflexes were too fast.

“He’s talking nonsense, guys,” you pleaded with their eyes. Before any of them could speak, Sukuna laughed and yelled, “I fucked her! And she was screaming and arching her back for me like she’d been deprived of dick her whole life! Don’t let her innocence fool you, she’s nothing but a whore!” He laughed once more and retreated back into Yuji’s skin.

You were so shocked that you couldn’t move. “What the fuck,” Megumi said, his usually half-lidded eyes widening. “Is it true?” Nobara asked. “Is that why you could barely walk today? Was it that big?” While those two were quietly asking questions in shock and utter disbelief, your pink-haired companion went completely ballistic. “I CAN’T REMEMBER ANY OF THIS. WHY WOULD HE DO THAT?!!! I DON’T UNDERSTAND...I’M NEVER SWITCHING WITH THAT IDIOT AGAIN!” He continued to have a system malfunction and babble, but your shame and embarrassment grew. You felt a slight pinch of anger forming as you realized that Gojo hadn’t explained anything to Yuji yet, even though he said he would. Yuji didn’t know about Sukuna’s deal yet.

“Was it...did you want to do it? I have to make sure. Because if you didn’t, I’ll kill that bastard right now with my own two hands” Nobara said. You swallowed the growing lump in your throat and nodded shamefully. “I wanted to.” “He’s taken so many innocent lives,” Megumi said quietly, and looked away. “Who’s side are you on?” Your shoes began to look really interesting, and you managed a weak, “I...didn’t want you guys to find out. It’s okay, you don’t have to worry about me. It’s extremely hard to explain, but I-you’re just going to have to trust me when I say I’ll be okay. There’s a...a reason I’m doing it.” Even saying it out loud sounded ridiculous. You had no guarantee that you would leave this arrangement unscathed, no guarantee except for...whatever Gojo’s protection had to offer.

There was no guarantee, either, that keeping up your end of the bargain would even save lives. “DID HE HURT YOU? DID I HURT YOU?” Yuji grabbed your shoulders and forced you to look up. “No, no. I’m good,” you answered. You were glad that your friends had your back, but extremely ashamed that you had let all of them down for your own selfish reasons. To play a game and keep a certain person jealous. What made you feel even worse, though, was the fact that you secretly didn’t want that game to end.

Yuji, sensing the tension, broke the silence. “All right, no more arguing. We’re going to go watch World War Z and forget that ever happened.” You were so grateful when him and Nobara took you by the arms and dragged you into another theater, Megumi following behind. Even if it was a zombie apocalypse movie, you needed the escape. “And more popcorn!” Yuji enthusiastically suggested, bolting to get another large bucket and then coming back within two seconds.

You tried, again, to focus on the movie but this time you weren’t distracted by you’re friends’ prodding elbows and crunching noises. It was the looming fear of what Sukuna was going to do to you day after tomorrow. The thought of his evil grin and sheer strength sent chills down your spine, and you sat up straight. You looked at Yuji for a minute, wondering if the king of curses was watching you writhe with nervousness right now. He was probably enjoying feeding off of your fear, you thought. And you were right. He was.

🌹

[taeslovehandles]

I never meant to target you and I'm sorry you felt that way. You properly tag everything and adhere to the "don't like, don't read" rule. I don't follow you nor you follow, because we simply don't vibe together and that's okay.

But there are posts that are on the more "innocent" side that do represent fat people as a joke and it's like they don't even realize it because it's something so well ingrained in our fatphobic society.

For example, all the characters are having fun except the fat one or referring to someone as "twice his size" (like... If they want to say he's huge, they should just say it, not imply that there's a "right size" for someone to be).

I don't think authors should censor themselves, just acknowledge the role they play in how fat characters are perceived by the community they write for.

-🍓

First of all, since you obviously haven’t blocked me, you could have come to me via direct message. This is not a topic that needs to be brought out into the public eye even more than it already is. I have worked with anons before, I would have been the last person to reveal who you are. You could have made a trash account to message me in dm’s, but since you didn’t, I will reply to you here.

I want to make one thing clear. This will be my last response on the topic. If you do not like me as a member of the community please use the block button and filter me out, because I will stay. I have many friends here, and know that many people enjoy my content. Just because a small handful of people don’t appreciate dark themes in fiction, the contents of which they can easily protect themselves from, won’t make me falter.

Now, I want to debunk this ask because your ‘apology’ actually made me very upset.

I know you don’t mean it when you say you are sorry because you’re backpedaling on what you’ve told your friends and it really rubs me the wrong way. You could have owned up to your mistakes and apologized sincerely like others had but you continue to play victim and excuse your behaviour with tales of your own trauma, projecting your own insecurities onto my blog and thus hating me.

I know for a fact that you despise my blog, especially my writing, because you do not like how “obviously skinny people write about weight gain.”

Honey.

I couldn’t be any further from skinny.

I don’t mind sharing my actual weight, which has actually gotten worse due to COVID. I weigh 490lbs. I am morbidly obese. I have always been morbidly obese. For you to come and be “nitpicky” about a genre you don’t even enjoy? Why are you even reading my fics then?

The way I write about obese people, their struggles with literally everything… that comes from real life experience. I write this to share embarrassing and exhausting daily life tasks I personally struggle with.

A skinny person would never write some of the stuff I do, because they simply don’t know. They don’t know how scary it is to hear the line “we are going to a restaurant.” They don’t know how scary it is to go into that new restaurant, scan the chairs and think “Shit, am I gonna fit? Is the chair gonna creak? Is there enough space for the next table? What if I won’t fit?” A thin person doesn’t have to think this way.

And, let me tell you something else. Yes, I agree. The world is fatphobic.

In one of my recent posts I talked about movies and shows where they make fun of fat people because I hate it. Because it is REAL LIFE. And I am all for the body positivity movement and I do believe that all bodies are beautiful, because they are.

You do not know me personally.

And that leads to my next point. If you personally have issues with the phrase “twice my size”, then that is on you. And guess what? I cannot count how often I’ve heard lines like that my whole life.

“Oh wow two people would fit in one of your pant legs.”

“Wow, you are so fat, I could use your pants as a tent.”

So trust me, I know. I KNOW. But anon, this is the important part for me. Everyone processes trauma differently.

Inked ch3? Or literally any story I have written with a fat character being forced, insulted and talked down to like they’re dumb? That’s what I have been living with my entire life. Most of these stories, some obviously more extreme than how I had experienced them since it’s fiction, have been recordings of trauma I have went through.

My own dad force fed me. Forced me to eat food and gain weight. My first boyfriend was a feeder that manipulated me into gaining more weight and took measurements. Called me pig names and abused me. Hit me, manipulated me into having s** with him and then let all of his fantasies out on me.

I don’t make this shit up. I hate my brain for being so twisted now, that I actually find it hot and arousing. It’s weird. I know, but that’s how it is.

I’ve also never had friends in school. Not even kindergarten. Why? Because my “fat incased body could spread like a virus.” I was being bullied like JK was in Pondus.

I had hot water thrown at me, got glue put on my seats and hair, had my hair ripped out and even got a cigarette burn mark on my arm. Just because I was fat. Just because of how my body was shaped.

I was strangled and locked into a small locker for a night. I was almost killed for running away from my abusive dad from his car and had to listen to things like, “You are going to die when you are 30. No one will ever love you and your body.” That I have trust issues now and am paranoid about everything and everyone.

Those dark stories. I use those dark stories to try to work through my trauma. And yes, it may be absurd to you. It may disgust you, what I write. But sadly, most of it? Most of it really happened to me. To me and other people I’ve talked to as a friend or seen online. Most of what I write will be dark because the human species is made up of terrible creatures.

Fatphobia is an important topic, and I am happy the media has been slowly getting better about it, that people accept us more. But my writing is how I work with my trauma. If I can make fictional characters feel the same things I had to feel, that makes me feel better.

And I’m not hurting anyone with it. So how is it wrong?

I do not support any of this behaviour in real life. I never bullied anyone, I always try to speak up for my friends and tell people if they are being assholes. Because I hate them too and it makes me angry when good people get shit when they do nothing but breathe.

And how @pudgecuddles already said. I don't need you to advocate for body positivity and all that shit when you go out of your way to bully someone that may have experienced the same shit you have. I do not know you or what you went through in your life, but I am sorry. I’m sorry you feel like my stories aren’t okay to write, but this is how I work on my trauma and I need you to respect that.

I’ve said this before. We don’t have to be friends, or even talk to each other.

Just be neutral.

Block me. Filter me out. Pretend I don't exist. But, whatever you do, don’t make posts that call me out while making it obvious you’re talking about me, with the cover that you are advocating against fatphobia. That’s got a name. Cyber-bullying.

Have you hurt me with those posts? Yes you have, but I’ve never wanted bad blood. As you may have noticed, it wasn’t me that made a post. It was my good friend. Because I told her how exhausting it was and she knew about the posts back then.

I have a good idea of who you are.

I remember you.

But I kept my mouth shut. Because this community is my home and the last thing I wanted was for the people who like both of our types of content to feel like they have to choose sides.

In the end, we all rub one out to fat gay boys in a band. No user is better than the rest, and if there are topics you do not enjoy, there is a button for it. No need to drag everyone into it with posts. It’s exhausting and irritating.

Now, I do not accept your apology because you lied to me and I also do not feel like you meant it sincerely knowing what I know now after reading some dm’s. But I also won’t sit here and start shit.

This is my last post about this.

Please block me and enjoy the content you do like.

Nonetheless, I hope you have a nice day and a lovely weekend. Whatever you are experiencing or going through, I hope it gets better. Because even if you hate me personally for creating content you do not support, I’d say that I am a really friendly and nice person.

I do not believe that anyone deserves to be bullied like that and talked down in official posts. It happened before with a friend of mine and you probably remember that I did speak up about it.... But apparently no one learned from it. I really hope this time you do.

Insult me and shit talk me all you want in dm’s, but don’t do it publicly. No one deserves that kind of hate or passive aggressiveness. No one. Since you sound like someone that went through a lot of shit too, you should know better. You should know how it feels to be bullied and what damage it can cause.

I’m already depressed enough and I have bad lows. Let me write my erotica and just enjoy it? That’s all I want? I am a part of this community just like you were. You leaving because you did not like my content, is not my problem. If you cannot block me or ignore it and go so far as to read them and then rant about them negatively, what do you want me to do? I won’t leave the scene just because you don’t like me.

So, you either trash talk me in dm’s from now on so that I do not see it, or you block me. The latter of which would be the more mature thing to do. The more humane thing to do. Because talking behind someone’s back is just as bad.

Again, I don’t know why you felt like it was necessary to send me an ask with lies in it when I got screenshot proof of something else you have said/issues with, so don’t backpedal on me. I know Hun. I know already.

At least stick to what you said and actually apologize or, if you can’t, just block me.

But this ask? This ask just upset me.

Have a nice day.

p.s: The fact that this even needs to be talked about is so absurd and ridiculous to me. The whole thing is a petty party in my eyes that isn't even worth anyone's time? Do people on here really not have any other issues right now or am I in the wrong movie?

[thepropertylovers]

The First Night I Ever Spent With My Husband

10 years ago on this day, we spent the night together for the first time in PJ’s 600 sq ft house after texting each other for two days straight. How has it already been a decade? At the same time, it feels like it’s been 100 years. Here’s how it all went down…

We had been texting for the past two days and I was a nervous wreck. I had never told anyone I was gay before, and to be honest, I never thought I would. After I told PJ (whom I had a crush on for the past four years) that I was gay, I had these knots in my stomach all day and night, so much so that I couldn’t even eat. I had confided in him, basically a stranger at the time, something I hadn’t told even my best friend or my family. It was an exciting and scary time, but I knew that I was grateful that I had found someone in my small, southern town that I could be honest with.

After coming out to him, and him confirming to me that he was gay, too (after years of speculation on my part!), he invited me to spend the night at his house that he had bought with his ex-boyfriend and renovated himself from top to bottom. They had only broken up maybe three days before, so the wound of recent heartache was still fresh for him. What was going to happen?! I didn’t let my mind fully go there. I was just happy to get an invite to be honest.

I told my mom I was going to spend the night at my friend Zach’s house (a lie I had to tell at 19 years old and still living at home) and she thought nothing of it. I was in the clear. I packed a bag of overnight clothes just in case he really meant it and wanted me to spend the night. Oh! I forgot to tell you. I was questioning everything at this point, and wasn’t even 100% sure PJ really wanted me to come over in the first place. My mind went to dark places like “Is he playing a prank on me and actually going to out me to everyone I know?” and “He has just been entertaining my texts the last few days and doesn’t really even care about me”. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? That’s what years of hiding who you really are will do to you. It can make you question everything and allow your mind to make up crazy scenarios.

But at the same time, I was a skinny 19 year old with tattoos who still lived with his mom. PJ was a successful 24 year old who bought his first house in cash at 22 and fixed up by himself. What did he see in me, I wondered? It felt like it was almost too good to be true. I had spent my whole life dreaming of a life I could live one day, where not hiding who I was wasn’t just the normal, it was the default. I never in a million years thought someone like PJ would be living in my little christian town, openly gay and willing to give me a chance. Looking back 10 years later it’s almost comical, but these were very real thoughts and feelings I had back then.

But back to the night of! I packed my bag, still unsure if I would actually need it or not, told my mom I was at a friend’s, blew off said friend by telling him I couldn’t come out that night (not my proudest moment), and headed to PJ’s little house for the first time ever. After seeing him in passing at our local community college over the years, out in town at restaurants, and maybestalkinghimonMySpace, it had all led up to this moment. I was actually going to the place where PJ McKay ate and slept and called his own. How was this real life? I called him on the way there and, because I had lived in this town forever and knew what was considered the “good” and “bad” part of town, I asked him if we were safe where he lived. He laughed and said he had lived there for two years and never had a problem. For context, the house he was living in cost him $10k to buy. I was worried, but only partially. Nothing, not even a house in a questionable part of town could ruin the thrill and excitement of driving to his home that night. It was, up until that point, the greatest night of my life. What would happen? What would we talk about? What if we had nothing to talk about? My mind was racing now.

I remember how nervous I was and what my expectations were when I walked up to his front porch. I remember feeling like I was about to throw up. I remember wondering if anybody had seen me pull in, or if someone that I knew would recognize my car in his driveway. I was terrified, but also electrified. My heart was racing. We sat on the couch, not very close to each other, but on the same piece of furniture nonetheless. We talked for hours about our pasts, our futures, and life in general. I told him I was bisexual (lol) and that I would probably marry a woman one day. He shrugged and confidently told me that he was gay. He was who he was. He didn’t care.

As the night went on, we decided to watch a movie. “The Jacket” with Adrien Brody. I had never seen it, and maybe he had? I can’t remember, but we put it on and sat there and tried to watch it. We got maybe 15 mins into it before pausing and talking some more. We didn’t have “nothing to talk about” after all. We never finished the movie and, to this day, I still haven’t seen it. Maybe I never will.

At some point that night, his ex-boyfriend drove past his house and, because it was at a dead-end, he pulled in his driveway to turn around. In doing so, he saw my car (though he didn’t know it was mine) and I can only imagine what he thought of the whole situation. I was so scared he would somehow find out the car was mine and tell someone I was there. That was a completely unrealistic scenario (he had no idea what kind of car I drove), but regardless, I was terrified. PJ reassured me he wouldn’t know who’s car it was and that everything was fine. We resumed talking for the next whoknowshowmany hours. Just talking, nothing more and nothing less.

At some point it had gotten to be 3 am somehow and PJ had to be up early for work in the morning. Like 7 am early. It was time for bed. To my surprise and delight, he told me I was welcome to sleep in his bed (!!!!) but warned me that he twists and turns and will probably kick me during the night if I did (womp womp) and that I could sleep in the guest room, but it was up to me. Knowing where my head was that night, can you guess which option I chose? Remember how much of a nervous, question-everything-and-believe-no-one-wreck I was? I took his warning as a sign that he didn’t want me to sleep in the same bed as him, that the night had gone terribly wrong and he never wanted to see me again, let alone sleep together. I chose the guest bedroom.

As you can imagine, I didn’t sleep much that night. I kept asking myself what I was doing there. How did I end up in the guest bedroom of the man I had a crush on for the last 4 years who, after much speculation, actually turned out to be gay like me, and was not only extremely attractive on the outside, but on the inside as well? I secretly hoped he would quietly knock on the door and ask if he could come in and sleep in the same bed. We wouldn’t even have to kiss. Just the feeling of actually sleeping next to a guy that I was attracted to would have been enough for me. I kept checking my phone to see if he had text me asking me to come to his room. After all, we had been texting all day and night for the past two days. Would it be that far off to assume one last good night text would illuminate my phone before I fell asleep?

I never got the text, or the knock at the door, and eventually I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to a quiet, empty house, and still no text. I knew I had blown it. But I remember thinking, as much as I wanted this to work out with PJ and dreamed about what our life could have been like (on the first night! getting way ahead of yourself here, Thomas), just having this one night alone with him, sharing a part of myself that I never had before, was enough for me. If I never see him again, or actually get the chance to kiss him, this was enough.

But then I saw, over on the table, a piece of paper with some scribbles on it, like it was waiting for someone (me) to discover it and read it. But it wasn’t a piece of paper, it was the back of an envelope (a detail that has stuck with me all these years-for some reason I thought it was so cute that he didn’t have a piece of paper to write on so he chose the back of the envelope of an old bill- anything would do, he just had to get his thoughts out on paper) that he probably rummaged around to find before heading out the door. Was I still asleep and dreaming? I thought i screwed everything up the night before. Why was he writing a note for me to wake up to like everything had gone so well? Was he just being nice?

But as soon as I read the letter, my thoughts and fears and doubts subsided and I let out a sigh of relief. Maybe this could be something. Maybe this could actually be something after all. Wouldn’t that be crazy? Because what are the odds I would meet someone in the same small town that I hated growing up in and always wanted to move away from? What are the odds that this 24 year old man would be interested in me in the first place? What are the odds that after all this time we would finally meet each other? I still have the letter and read it from time to time when I’m feeling sentimental:

At the risk of sounding too dramatic, it was like all of my dreams were coming true after so many years of believing I would never come out, fearing I would be in the closet forever. Even after just one night, I felt hope with him, a feeling I would feel every day for the next 10 years with him by my side. I felt hopeful that I could finally be myself to those I loved most. I felt hopeful that maybe I could have a happily ever after in a town that isn’t known for embracing those who are different. I felt hopeful that I could finally show someone how much I could love them completely, how much I had to give. For the first time in my life, I had hope, and it was because of him.

For the next few days, we texted each other nonstop, day and night, and tried to see each other, in secret, as much as possible. And then the days turned into weeks, and we would meet in parking lots and just talk (and sometimes kiss), and I would spend the night at his house and we would watch DVD’s on his laptop on his bed because he didn’t have a TV or internet. And then the weeks turned into months and it became clear very shortly that I wanted to marry this man one day. I loved him more than I had ever loved anyone and I often wondered how I got so lucky to be able to call him mine, because there are a whole lotta guys out there, and was I going to be a good boyfriend? Was I going to be enough for him? Alas, he still chose me. It was an exhilarating and scary and thrilling and hard and wonderful time back then and looking back, I wouldn’t change a thing a decade later.

I saw him as an angel, a savior of sorts, who found me at the exact right time and saved me from a life of hiding who I was, which is no life at all. To me, he was perfect. And still is. If you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading about a part of my life I will never forget and cherish deeply.

The last 10 years have been filled with so many ups and downs that I’ve lost count. But the truth remains that PJ McKay helped me to be okay with myself. He helped me to be okay with living in the same small town that I hated growing up in but love growing old in with him by my side. He helped me to come out to my family and friends one by one, never pressuring me or forcing me to do anything I didn’t want to do. He helped me to see the world in a different light, to take chances, and to work hard to accomplish my goals. He helped that skinny 19 year old boy with tattoos who still lived at his mom’s house to believe in himself and understand his worth.

My helper. My crush. My realtor. My handyman. My first boyfriend. My husband. Thank you for these past 10 years, Timothy Paul Jasper McKay. What wonderful life it is loving you.

xx

[stenbrozier]

Adopting a Kitten with the Adult!Losers

Warnings: slight PTSD mention from cat attacks + swearing

——————————————————————————

Bill:

- He’d be a little hesitant about getting a cat

- Not because he doesn’t like them, just because he never had any pets growing up and he didn’t wanna do the wrong thing

- You had found the Calico kitten on the side of the road on the way home from work shaking in the rain storm, and, while he was all for helping the poor thing, he thought that you were going to take it to a shelter after a day or so

- But when you gave him puppy eyes and asked him to keep it, Bill became putty in your hands and immediately ran to the pet store to get the cat a cute lil collar and the other things she needed to live comfortably

- You named her Jupiter and she was very bouncy and energetic, something Bill could simply never get used to

- She’d jump on his desk and slide on the papers or run under his feet when he was coming downstairs for dinner

- But he loved her nonetheless

- Bill didn’t show it, but you could tell he loved whenever she’d curl up in his lap or whenever he heard her little feet running across the hall to come see him in his office

- One time, while he thought you were taking a nap, you heard him playing with her and giggling softly, talking to her in an adorable little baby voice

- He simply loved her, even as she got older and become more relaxed but more clingy

- Jupiter could be most likely found in his lap or in his arms, and it was simply the most adorable thing

Richie:

- He hates cats

- He didn’t have any animals growing up, but he was attacked by the neighborhood stray when he was around 9 or 10, and ever since then, he thought that they were demons

- Richie was walking through LA to get you guys something good for breakfast when he ended up in front of a pet store and he had the crazy urge to walk in

- As soon as he stepped in, there was a cat cage and there was a tiny white kitten with a little pink color on

- Richie didn’t know why but his heart kinda melted and he got all excited

- He pulled out his phone and snapped a picture, sending it to you accompanied by a text that read “please 🥺🥺”

- “Rich I thought you hated cats.” “yeah but this one is pretty” “fine but you better still be getting breakfast”

- He adopted the cat, getting everything she needed and literally going overboard

- After picking up some pancakes at the old diner in the city, he walked back with bags filled with things for her in one hand, your breakfast in the other, and then her sleeping in his shirt pocket

- Richie walked in with a smile on his face and you cooed at the little kitten softly, begging him to name her Marie, like the cat from Aristocats

- “Baby I don’t care as long as she can sit at the table when we eat” “Richie cats sit at the table their food bowl belong on the floor” “No she’s a princess and she should be treated as such”

- And to think that just hours before, Richie refused to let a cat step foot in the house

Eddie:

- When you guys moved into your first house together, he was adamant on no animals

- He grew up believing that he was allergic, despite how many times he went to a friend’s house with a dog or a couple cats and nothing happened

- But one day, as you were exploring the little town you guys moved into, you stumbled upon a pet store and begged him to go in

- Eddie was reluctant but when he saw how excited you got when you saw the little kittens in the cage by the window, he gave in

- “Eddie, they’re so tiny” you reached your hand in and started playing with a solid grey one, the sunlight bouncing off its fur and reflecting a silvery light

- You asked to pick it up out of the cage and when the worker handed it to you, she told you his name was Mushroom

- “Eddie, did you hear” “Yes, Baby, I heard. Mushroom” Eddie had is arms crossed over his chest but when the cat snuggled into your chest his heart melted a little at the face you gave him

- “Ed-“ “What does a cat need”

- You smiled wide and told him the basics: food, bowls, litter box, litter, and you even convinced him to get a couple of quiet toys

- He wanted to get a collar for him, but he decided that he would be a strictly indoor cat and there would be no need

- On the walk home, Mushroom stayed in your arms as you talked to him softly, getting back a few meows in response

- Eddie just smiled and wrapped his hand around your waist, holding everything else in his free hand

Stanley:

- As soon as you guys moved in together after college, he wanted an animal. He was able to work from home with his accounting job, and you couldn’t, so he was always very lonely

- Stanley is a whiner. He whined about you leaving for work every morning or when you were too tired to watch a movie with him at night

- So for his birthday, you decided you were going to get him a lil friend

- You went to the shelter, asking to see all the cats cause he would not like a dog, and you saw this older cat named Margo

- She was about 4, all nice and calm, and she had a pretty black coat with piercing eyes that reminded you of Stanley’s

- You had to get her, and so you did

- You wanted to surprise Stan, obviously so you brought her home through the back door, knowing his was working in his office in the front of the house

- You waited until he had gotten up to go to the bathroom to walk out into main part of your house, letting the cat out to get accustomed

- Stanley walked back in with a glass of water and nearly dropped it when he saw the little fuzzy being sniffing around his wheelie office chair

- “No way” he had tears in his eyes as he calmly went up to the cat, scratching behind her ear “whats her name”

- “Marco” “Holy shit. Hi, Marco, I’m your dad”

- She snuggled right up into his hand causing him to start crying because of how happy he was

- “Now I won’t be lonely ever again. God, (Y/N), I love you”

Mike:

- Since you guys lived so close to the library, you were able to think about getting an animal

- You both worked the same hours together at the library, so a dog was out of the question, but Mike brought the idea of getting a cat

- It just so happened that a few days after you guys talked about it, you found a skinny kitten curled up underneath the awning of the entrance on a hot day

- You took the kitten in, and placed it on the front desk

- “Mikey, we have to keep him” “Okay, he can be our library cat”

- You never really gave him a name, just always called him “Baby”

- You guys bought him everything he needed and got him a collar, knowing that he’d probably be happier as an outdoor cat as well

- You guys attached a little cat door to the front of the library

- You also started taking donations for the local animal shelter in honor of the new kitten

- You guys also got more visitors because they all came to see your kitten

- As he got older, he’d wander a lot and would bring back friends, sometimes pregnant friends

- There were many times that you guys had to replace the pillows of the couches because there were little kittens born on them

- But, since you and Miek had no kids, “Baby” and his friends were always welcome, even if you told them no because they’d get in anyways

Ben:

- Ben always wanted a dog, but it was difficult to get one with your busy schedules

- So you ended up getting a cat from the shelter, a big 5 year old Maine Coon named Ziti

- He was big and cuddly enough for it to seem like there was a dog around the house

- But easy maintenance cause it was still a cat

- Ben would be gone for weeks at a time and you worked 8 hour days, so it was the best option and it was nice on your end to not come home to emptiness some days

- It was really strange having such a small animal in such an expansive house, but you wouldn’t trade it

- He’d lay with you and Ben during movie nights and would beg for attention with harsh, deep mewls

- Ziti would sit on Ben’s lap while he did conference calls, and it was really funny to you because he would have this stern look on his face that would just scream “I’m involved too”

- “Baby, come take Ziti” “Mr. Hanscom...you named him Ziti?” “That was his given name...(Y/N)!”

- Ziti was attached to Ben, like he was always with him and it was so sweet to watch Ben prepare dinner and have Ziti sitting on the counter next to him

Bev:

- She had always wanted a cat. It was you who was hesitant

- While you were both home for work, she still wanted another companion around that would make your small studio apartment feel a little more like home

- You felt bad for keeping an animal cooped in your apartment

- But Bev argued that cats were made for apartment life

- So you went to the shelter and adopted a ginger cat named Rocky

- He was big and tough and liked to cuddle

- He was also severely distracting because he was talkative and it annoyed you to no end

- But Bev wanted him because he would sit with her while she sewed dresses together

- He would sit with you in the couch against your laptop because he liked the heat emitted from it

- But he was very large and it was hard for you to focus because he looked so content and you just wanted to kiss him all the time

- He had that effect on you

- He was your guys’ baby and he knew it

[cosmicbash]

@friendshipfisting requested some grumpy Em at the beach while chatting and I got a little bit carried away writing dorky fluff so-

You lucky heathens are getting a huge prompt drop. Hope you enjoy~

(This is long enough I could post it to ao3 if someone wants to come up with a title ahah)

--

Marshall hated beaches. He always had, they were just always so overcrowded whenever he tried going. And huge clusters of people did nothing but stress him out, even before he got famous and all those claustrophobic fears of a crowd closing in on him suddenly became a reality.

When he was younger and getting absolutely trashed everyday it was easier to deal with. The combination of pills and booze kept him mellow enough that he could even throw himself into a crowd at his own concerts. Helped build up somewhat of a tolerance for whenever he got up on stage.

Outside of performing however? They were still an absolute nightmare that made his stomach twist up into knots. A brief pass through, and maybe a few stops to meet and greet fans he could handle. But actively plopping himself into the hot sandy clusterfuck known as a public beach? That was the furthest thing from fun or relaxing that he could think of. 

Luckily living in the middle of Detroit meant he was mostly free of dealing with said landscape.

So why in the hell was he struggling to get comfortable on some stiff itchy wooden beach chair, with the ocean loudly looming not very far away?

"The wave's are freaking perfect today-" Colson was beaming a smile at him, almost as blinding as the sun resting behind his pretty wet head. The lighting ironically formed a halo around the self proclaimed rap devil. It made Marshall want to snort. "You should seriously come in."

"I'm perfectly fine right here." Under the safety of his umbrella, above the hazardous hot sand. And most importantly far away from the heavy crashing waves. 

Swimming wasn't his best skill either, afterall there was not much need to swim when you avoided the beach. Sure he could wade in a pool and float on his back if needed, but moving, rushing water was a completely different ballgame.

"You're such a drag," Colson's eyes rolled, long legs kicking up sand while he crossed the distance between them. He was still dripping water all over the place, stray droplets splashing onto Marshall's legs when he loomed ever closer to the chair.

Reflexively the older man tucked his notebook away in the nearby bag, knees pulling up so he could resituate himself. Legs crossing indian style to give the brat a place to sit. 

Marshall couldn't care less about being a "drag", he'd been very vocal about his displeasure with the whole idea of wasting a day at the beach. For once he'd taken over the role of bitchy pushover. Spending most of the night before and morning of their trip muttering under his breath, listing all the reasons why it was such a stupid idea. But still going through with the process of booking and reserving a secluded spot for them on some remote beach.

The only reason he'd put up with it at all was for the younger rapper's sake, something which he hoped Colson could actually learn to appreciate. It wasn't common for him to concede like this, but it was only fair. "You enjoying choking on salt water and burning your skin?"

The tall blonde dropped down with a hard plop, legs bouncing to disturb more sand while the beach chair creaked. The bitter question didn't seem to phase his good mood one bit. "Yupp! Loving it. I've missed the beach, I was starting to look like a ghost."

More water splattered against Marshall's ankles, had his skin twitching. "One more big wave like earlier and you might be one-" The brunette was thankful he had shades on, just recalling the moment only a half hour prior when a huge wave had suddenly crashed down and disappeared his partner made his face curl up. It had been a genuinely terrifying minute of watching and waiting for Colson's soaked head to reappear above the water. One that nearly had him leaving his tiny sanctuary to pound down the length of sand separating him from the water. 

Thankfully the younger rapper had resurfaced, farther out then when he'd been hit. Laughter visible even from his distance with the hard shake of the boys shoulders and wide smile. 

"What? That was nothing, you should've seen how big some of the waves over in the Bahama's could get. Now those, those could totally sweep you out to sea."

Clicking his tongue Marshall gave a swift nod, fingers prying open their small cooler to dig out a cold bottle of water. "I'll take your word for it." The last thing he needed was for the kid to get a Bahama's vacation plan into his head. 

Colson sighed dramatically, upper body dropping down to drape over the older man's lap. Inciting a string of curses and half hearted shoves from how the action left water soaking through his shorts. "A little bit of sun and water isn't gonna kill you old man, you look ridiculous all bundled up here in your shirt and hat. Like some horrible undercover pap who's hiding a camera in his beach bag."

The observation was accompanied by a soft laugh and long fingers tugging at the collar of his shirt, trailing up along his jaw to flick his hat.

Marshall's teeth set in a line. "What, you want me stripped down streaking across the beach? Tattoos and dick free for an actual reporter to see?"

The chance of some paparazzo being nearby was slim to none, they both knew that. Marshall had gone out of his way to rent the accompanying two beaches on either side despite the small cliffs between them. There was noone other than their own mix of security teams for miles. The only chance someone was getting a shot of either of them was with a drone.

In theory Marshall could strip down and dance about the beach all he wanted, grab Colson by his skinny waist and fuck him down into the sand until he was choking on a seashell. He was fully confident in his team.

That didn't mean any of that sounded remotely tempting however.

"Maybe not running across the beach," Colson snickered body twisting until he was lying with the back of his head against the older man's crotch. Arms curled up over his head so he could lightly grip onto his sides and stretch the rest of his body out. "A slow sensual walk towards the water sounds a lot better. Would give me something really great to look at."

The harsh tug on wet blonde locks barely elicited a reaction. "If your hoping for a full moon tonight you're gonna be disappointed. News called for clouds-" It was easier to deflect from the brats flirting then reward him with a proper response.

"With how your pants sag I'm guaranteed at least a half moon before sundown." This time Marshall was the one sighing, head shaking while he rubbed his temples. Colson of course looked beyond pleased with his joke, damp hands rubbing up over the front of his shirt to lightly massage his shoulders. "Unless your planning on dressing correctly for once while we walk the shoreline."

"Who said anything about walking along the shoreline? When did I agree to that?"

"What, we're gonna have a beach date and not enjoy the sunset together? It's no wonder you've been divorced twice." The light teasing had Marshall snorting despite himself. Palm pushing his sunglasses up off his face and much to his partner's delight knocking away his sunhat.

"Actually I let Kim's other boyfriends worry about the mushy shit like that, last time I went to a beach with her she left me passed out along the shoreline while the tide was rising." The memory had him chuckling quietly to himself while his gaze trailed along with white shoreline. "Fucking bitch almost let me drown all because I snorted her share of coke."

"Jesus-" Colson's lips burst apart in a laugh. Palms leaving the older rapper's shoulders to cup his neck instead. "Hope she at least cleaned your pockets out before she left-"

The suggestion had Marshall's gaze dropping back down, lips quirking up into a smirk while his fingers raked through Colson's knotted hair. "You'd think so right? Damn bitch swiped my wallet and forgot the motel's key card. Came back to wake my half submerged ass up and bitch how hard of a time I was giving her- like- fuck me for not reminding her it was in my back pocket while I was drowning!"

The outburst had them both laughing finally, Colson's boisterous and expressive was Marshall's was quieter and reserved to a soft shake of his shoulders. A few years ago the same story might've dragged up residual hurt feelings. Colson's soft fingers tickling his throat and heavy body helped keep them away.

"I'll keep that in mind in case I wanna drown your ass sometime soon."

"Probably already have it planned out, why your so eager to get me walking along the shore."

This time when Colson snorted it was followed up with a firm pull. "Fuck, ya caught me-" Large hands curling around the back of his neck to pull him down for an upside down kiss. It was interrupted by panted breaths and light shakes of the younger rapper's head but the action soothed his mood nonetheless.

Colson's mouth was warm against his own and tasted like salty sea water. Marshall even swore he could feel the scratch of sand against his chin but continued to kiss back anyway. The moment was pleasant, helped ease what little stress he had left in his temples.

The broke apart when his back started to ache, fingers tugging softly at the tangled blonde locks until they separated. "If I walk you along the shore like some cheesy hallmark movie can we skip the whole lovey dovey sunset gazing bullshit?"

Colson mock gasped. "And ruin my proposal I had planned?"

Leaning back Marshall moved to uncross his legs, forcing his behemoth of a partner to sit up himself. "If it's another collab idea dragging me out into this ridiculous sun and pesty sand was the worst way to soften me up-"

"Actually I was gonna propose we try fucking out in the ocean. Was hoping the whole weightless thing with the water meant you could hold me up while we fucked." The sleazy wink had Marshall shooting Colson a worried look. It was hard to tell how serious the brat was being. It sounded just like the kind of stupid thing he would actually plan.

"That's one way to break the news to the media," The brunette couldn't help but shake his head and laugh while he climbed back up onto his feet. Hand catching the wide umbrella so he wouldn't knock it over. "Rap God Eminem and rival MGK found naked adrift at sea together. Nude!"

For what felt like the millionth time that day Colson cackled, long neck stretching out while he threw his head back. "We- haha- We don't both have to be naked! Why would you take your shorts off too? You actually wanna skinny dip with me?"

"God no. I don't think I'd ever get the sand out of my ass. Fuck I've been sitting down this whole time and there's some inside my thighs." 

Colson was less graceful when he stood up, full on jostling the umbrella with his head. Fingers curling around the older rapper's abandoned hat to slap it back ontop of his head. "That's half the fun of going to the beach. Getting sand in all kinds of-"Their eyes met in a brief flirty gaze. "Uncomfortable places."

The wink that followed was all the encouragement Marshall needed to start walking towards the beach. Eyes rolling so hard he thought they might get stuck in the back of his head. The sooner they got down to the shore the sooner he could get back to comfort of a nice soft hotel bed.

And promptly screw the blondes brains out.

[crimsonslytherin]

Bleeding Hearts - Prologue

Genre: Romance, Supernatural, Friendship,

Pairing: Sirius x F!OC x Severus (Love triangle, not polygamy)

Fic Rated: T (Might change)

Summary: Erin Norton is a vampire and Remus Lupin is a werewolf. An unlikely pair to say the least but a close pair nonetheless. Trusted with the other’s secret and inseparable until they’re placed in rival houses.

A/N: Set during the Marauder’s time. Most things I’ll be going off the wikia for when I need to. It will go into the movies/books time period after a (long) while.

(Pro) (Ch 1) (Ch 2) (Ch 3) 

A painful howl of a scream pierced the through the silence of the night causing Erin’s head to snap in its direction. From her place high in a tree she could see that nearby birds flew away from the source and a few animals scurried away. The trees rustled and branches snapped as something headed her way. There was another strangled howl before a figure fell into view through some bushes. Erin watched with wide eyes as the figure twisted and turned on the ground as it whimpered. She flinched as she heard the loud snap and crack of bones. She couldn’t look away as she saw the hair retreat from their body and the overall size of the figure shrink down. With a final cry the figure stopped moving. They lay there, their chest heaving up and down. The way the cool air frosted their breath made them resemble a hard working chimney. After a moment the boy curled up into a ball and began to shiver as a cold night wind hit his bare skin. He looked to be around Erin’s age and was very skinny but not unhealthily so. The boy shook violently as he whimpered, tears streaming down his cheeks. Erin frowned as she watched him as he sobbed. She took off her jacket before dropping it down to him. The boy flinched as it landed a few feet from him. He immediately looked up into the tree and spotted her. Her green eyes seemed to shine slightly, even in the dark. Of course he could see her almost perfectly clear through the dark as she could see him.

“You’ll catch a cold.” she said quietly as she tilted her head. The boy looked to the jacket, then to Erin then back to the jacket before he pulled it on and covered himself.

“Won’t you come down?” he asked as he looked back up at her. Erin smiled and nodded before she stood on the branch. The boy’s eyes widened and he stood as well pulling the jacket down to cover himself as best her could. As Erin moved to hang from the branch, before she dropped down, the boy finally noticed how high up she’d been and wondered how she’d even been able to climb that high on her own. Erin landed crouched on the ground with a soft thud. She stood up and brushed any dirt off the pleated skirt of her dark green collared dress.  “How…?” The boy breathed out as he looked from the girl to the branch again. Erin smiled and as the boy lowered his gaze back down to her, and caught sight of her teeth, he understood. “You’re a vampire.”

“And you’re a werewolf.” Erin said with a nod. “I won’t tell anyone if you won’t.” The boy shook his head.

“Of course not. I-I wouldn’t dare… Thank you.”

“I’m Erin Norton.” she said as she brushed her black hair behind her ear.

“I-I know… we go to school together.” He said as he finally remembered where he’d seen her face before. “We’re not in the same class but I’ve seen you around.” She nodded; she hadn’t recognized him until she’d gotten closer to him, but she didn’t remember his name.

“Normally when one gives their name you’re supposed to give yours back.” Erin pointed out before she sat on the ground.

“Oh- I’m sorry. I’m Remus. Remus Lupin.” He said as he sat beside her. Erin smiled. “Thank you for…” he pulled her jacket tighter around him.

“You’re welcome.”

“How are you-? How do you go to school if…”

“I’m only half vampire.” Erin explained as she looked down at her hands in her lap. “My father’s a vampire but…my mum’s a … well my mum’s a witch.”

“My father is a wizard!” He exclaimed with a grin. “I-I mean I am too! …Are you?” Erin nodded with a small smile. “This is great.” Remus said. “Finally someone else besides my parents know.” He let out a sigh of relief.

“I could say the same. Do you know how hard it is having to hide my fangs all the time?” Erin asked with a sigh. “I wish I would lose them already so I could get my grown up fangs.” Remus tilted his head.

“Vampires have… baby teeth?” he asked.

“Of course. You do, don’t you?”

“Well, yes but-“

“Mine just can’t retract like grownup ones do. There’s no difference between us.”

“Except the whole moon and blood thing.” Remus pointed out with a slight smile as he rubbed the back of his neck. Erin smiled back with a slight giggle that made his smile grow.

“Yes, except that.”

___________________________

“Do you ever… hate yourself?” Erin asked as she kicked the dirt under her swing before she looked up at the other children playing and running around on the playground. Remus frowned and looked at her from his swing.

“Why do you ask?” he asked.

“Cause…I do.” she admitted. Remus’ frown deepened. Erin glanced over at him briefly. “I know that I’ll be accepted, at Hogwarts, for…” she lowered her voice. “being a witch but… people don’t like vampires.”

“Wizards are different; they’re more accepting of… people like us. I mean muggles don’t exactly like werewolves either.” He said as he looked out at other children.

“Sometimes I wish I wasn’t a vampire.” Erin said. Remus looked down at his lap.

“Only sometimes?” he asked.

“It’s who I am…but…”

“It wasn’t a choice.” Remus said. Erin nodded. “You’re lucky though…” Erin turned her head to look at him. “Wizards are more accepting of vampires than werewolves. Vampires… you can control yourself… me…” he sighed. “My parents and I aren’t even sure I should attend Hogwarts…”

“You have to go!” Erin said with wide eyes. Remus looked at her and saw the fear in her eyes. “I-I can’t be alone again. I know about you and you know about me. It’ll be so much easier for the both of us.”

“But it won’t be safe for you, or any of the other students, if I attend.” He insisted. “I can’t control it.” Erin bit her bottom lip. “I want to be there with you, I really do, but I don’t want to put anyone in danger.”

“But how else will you learn to be a wizard?”

“My father could… home-school me.” Remus shrugged before letting out another sigh. “I don’t know… this would be so much easier if I were normal.” Erin frowned.

“If that’s normal what does that make me?” she asked. Remus’ eyes widened.

“No-! I didn’t mean-! I didn’t mean that you weren’t…”

“It’s okay. I know I’m not normal.” she said quietly as she looked down.

“Erie… I didn’t mean it like that… You’re much more normal than I am.” He said. Erin peeked up at him. “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize.” She said. “Just…” she looked back down at her hands in her lap. “Please think about going to Hogwarts?”

“Of course.” Remus said with a smile. Erin peeked up at him again before she smiled back. “Do you want me to push you?” he asked. Erin’s face lit up.

“Okay!” Remus got up and moved behind her as she held onto the chain of her swing. He pushed her gently making her giggle. “Remus?” she asked.

“Yeah?” he asked as he gave her another push.

“Will you always be my friend?”

“Of course, Erie.”

___________________________

(Next Chapter)

A/N: So there’s the prologue. Remember this is going to be a Sirius/OC/Severus, but not polygamy. I’m going to have each year either one chapter or two until they’re in their 5/6 year.

I picture Erin as Michelle Trachtenberg (She’s been in enough movies that you can see her grow up, for a better idea of how Erin would look at different ages in the story.)

[jising-jisang-jisung]

Love Her | Lee Donghyuck (Haechan)

A/n: Kinda based off the song Love Her by the Jonas Brothers. The first of my little series for the dreamies. Hope you like it.

Genre: angst? fluff

Word count: 1.5k

~~~~~~

[2:47 am]

Demon sunshine 🌻: hey, y/n, anyone ask you to prom???

You: you already know the answer to that question

You: dont rub it in :,(

Demon sunshine 🌻: it's okay. I'm probably going alone too.

You: what?? But tons of girls asked you.

[read 3:02 am]

Your best friend didn't respond to your text and you decided it was already late enough. However, that night, amongst your slumber, you devised a great plan- or rather idea- that you should just ask Donghyuck to prom so you both can just go together. I mean, you probably would be attending it together anyways so what difference does it make. Now, you just get to tell people that you have a date.

That morning you saw Donghyuck loitering by your locker, as usual. "Hey Hyuckie! What if I just ask you to prom?" You assumed he would love the idea. What's not to like? He'd be going to prom with his best friend either way and who doesn't love their best friend?

"That's literally the worst idea I've ever heard." I guess Donghyuck doesn't love his best friend. "If you ask me, I'll be so embarrassed. I'll say no, just like I did to everyone else."

You opened your mouth but realized you had nothing to say. Nevermind your calculus textbook, you just left your locker and headed towards your class. For the rest of the day, Hyuck was no where to be found. This was lucky for you because you were also avoiding him. He had been cranky for the past few days and now he's being mean to you for no reason!! You were sick of his crap to say the least. Even at lunch, he was missing. Your heart lowkey hurt, but like you weren't going to seek him out. He is the one who needed to come find you to apologize to.

He never did. Prom was just a few days away and Donghyuck hasn't texted you since that night. In school, he avoids you. You guess that you'll never find out what you did to turn him off. Other than offer to go to prom with him, that is.

Well, at this point, you didn't care what Donghyuck did with his life. He obviously doesn't want to be friends anymore so you weren't going to make him.

[9:23 pm]

You: I still don't have a date... pleeeaassseee go with me to prom??? Pretty please >.>

Poison drinker: y/n, I already told you that I'm going with Jules. I'm really sorry but you know I cant...

Poison drinker: try Jeno tho. He doesn't have a date yet either and we both know how week he is if you pout about it

You: okayyy I understand.. but thanks for the advice!! Operation Make Jeno Feel Bad For Y/N is a go!

Poison drinker: goodluck!! Go get urself a date

You lied down on your bed, thinking about asking your other friend, Jeno. Maybe you just shouldn't go to prom. Hyuck will be there and you're still upset with him. Who cares anyway. It's just prom. There are more important things like college aps and SATs. At least, that's what you tried to convince yourself.

[10:11 pm]

(Un)funny clown: hey, y/n!! Jaemin said you were looking for a prom date?? Well, if you still need one, so do i... we could go together as friends if you're interested.

Forget what you were thinking about not going. You've changed your mind. You are going to prom. And you are going to be the hottest bitch their. Wait no, you ain't no bitch, sis you a skinny queen!!

[10:13 pm]

You: Jeno!!! I would love to go to prom with you. Thanks so much for asking. I really didnt want to go alone so now I'm excited :D

You plugged your phone in next to your bed and drifted into a peaceful sleep.

Jeno came to pick you up for prom and you went with Jaemin and his date too. The whole group went together, minus Donghyuck. You saw him from across the dance floor. He was leaning on the wall, glaring at you. What is his problem? He acts like he hates you and over what? You suggesting to ask him to prom? He was being unbelievable. You decided to ignore him and continue to dance with your date and other friends. You looked back over to where Donghyuck had been standing but he was no where to be seen. Jeno seemed to pick up on what had happened and silently asked if you wanted to leave.

"No, no. I'm fine. I'm just gonna go get some water," you tried to reassure him.

"I'll come with. It is really hot on the dance floor."

"That's just Jaemin," you smiled at your not funny joke, earning you a pinch on the arm from Jeno.

"I don't wanna talk about that right now. He's here with a date."

As you turned back to continue walking towards the refreshments you accidently bump into someone.

"Hey, dude watch where y- oh I'm sorry. I should've been looking. Uh..." Donghyuck looks down at the ground as he begins to run away in the opposite direction you were heading. You turned back to Jeno to send him a questioning look but he nodded his head, gesturing to Hyuck.

"Go talk to him. Please, y/n, you are the only one that can fix this. Trust me, the rest of us have tried. He only listens to you."

Your worries came back as you still felt empathy for your best friend. Sure he was being a jerk, but Jeno seems to know why. And he also seems to think that it isn't as bad as you feel it is. So, you reluctantly head after your best friend.

"Hey. Are you okay?"

"Oh! Yeah sorry. You startled me." He was sitting in the corner of the entrance, where nobody else was. He probably just wanted to be alone. When he lifted his eyes, ever so briefly, to meet yours, you saw the shiny streaks down his face.

"Were you crying?" Without thinking, you naturally grabbed his face, wiping away the remaining tears. "It's okay if you were. I've seen you cry 100 times."

"I'm sorry, y/n. I'm such an idiot."

"Yeah you are. But what specific reason were you an idiot for this time?" He murmured a response under his breath but it was incoherent to you. "Sorry, I- I didn't quite catch that."

"Because I- I just-" he began to cry again.

"It's alright. You don't have to tell me if it's too hard."

"Why are you so wonderful? I've been such a douche lately and you didn't deserve that. Nonetheless, here you are now being so kind to me. Why?"

"Well, even if we aren't being friendly with each other at the moment. You're still my best friend."

"I don't want to be."

He turned his head. Now he was staring at you with a glint in his eyes. Being the dummy you are, you misunderstood what he was implying.

"You- you don't want to be my friend anymore? I mean, if that's what you want. If that will make you feel better then it's okay." Your eyes began to fill with tears, mimicking Donghyuck's minutes earlier.

"No. I don't want to be your friend." He lifted your chin to meet your gaze. "I want to be more. What I tried to say earlier, I think I can say it now." He took a deep breath before he continued. "I love you, y/n." You stood in silence, unsure of how to react to his confession. "And it's perfectly fine if you don't reciprocate my feelings. I just- I said no to everyone who asked me to prom because I wanted to ask you. But, when you said that you wanted to ask me, I got embarrassed. I shouldn't have acted the way I did. I'm so so sorry, y/n. Please forgive me."

"Hey Hyuckie?" He looked up at you. "Will you go to prom with me?" He nodded his head quickly as you grabbed his hand and dragged him back to the dance floor where the rest of your friends were waiting.

"Hey! What happened? Are you guys friends again?"

"Yeah, I apologized. You know she's always right," Hyuck explained.

"But were not friends," you retorted.

"Wait, what do you-" and before Donghyuck could finish his sentence, you sneaked a peck at his lips.

"You confessed to me. What did you think would happen?"

"Yeah, but you never said you loved me back."

"I love you too, Hyuckie."

The rest of the night was spent busting down on the dancefloor while all your friends made fun of you and your now boyfriend for being complete idiots (mainly him but go off I guess). Afterwards you went back to his house to watch movies, cuddle, and maybe makeout for a few hours.

[andremarcusburky]

Wish for a peaceful night [4] - N.P.

A/N: FINAL part! Another shoutout to @psychospeak-blog because she’s helped me with this short series, also because she’s an amazing writer so

masterlist

part 1 [2] [3]

You laid facing him, his arms around you while his chest heaved up and down as he slept. Your cheek touched the skin of his chest and you couldn’t help but smell him. As you did he pulled you closer, bringing his head down to yours so his lips were touching your forehead. One of his arms came up to cradle your head, and you don’t think you’ve ever felt so safe in your entire life. Only then did you realize how far up your shirt had gotten as you’d slept, practically your whole abdomen was uncovered. But it was also pressed against Nolan, skin to skin.

It was christmas morning, at last. After talking to your parents the previous day it was clear you wouldn’t be able to see them, but they promised to come visit in january instead. At this point christmas with Nolan seemed perfect, especially if it means you get to be this close to him.

At that moment Nolan stirred in his sleep, eyes slowly opening as he laid back on his pillow. You suddenly felt a lot colder, not having his body against yours.

You pretended to be asleep, not wanting him to know how much you enjoyed being wrapped up in his arms. That’s when you felt his thumb graze your jawbone, and then the warmth was back. You slowly opened your eyes, pretending to be waking up. Meeting you were Nolan’s eyes, along with a smile on his face. “Merry Christmas, sleepyhead” he said. He had bed-hair, and it just might be the sexiest thing you’ve ever seen.

You smiled back at him and jawned. “Merry christmas, Nols” you answered. Only now did you realize you couldn’t remember how you’d gotten to bed, all you recall is watching ‘Home Alone’ in Nolans couch last night, then nothing. That, too, had been quite special.

When you were younger it had almost been a tradition to gather your friends before christmas and watch together, but as you got older it just slipped your mind. Nolan remembered still, though. He’d set everything up himself, without asking you. Then when you’d sat down just far away enough to not touch him, he’d made you come to him anyway so you could cuddle. Not that you complained.

You looked around the room, clearly confused while Nolans laughed lightly. “You fell asleep” he explained. You looked over at him, still wondering how you got to the bed.

“You fell asleep halfway through the movie and I carried you here” he said. “Thanks” you nodded slowly as you spoke. A faint blush covered your cheeks as you pictured Nolan carrying your sleeping frame to bed.

He looked you over and smiled before laying his head down once again. “How about five more minutes?” he said and turned his head to face down into the pillow. Nolan once again pulled you closer into his chest, your legs tangling together just slightly. It felt domestic, it felt right. Your heart was beating ten times faster than it should, but you didn’t want to be anywhere else in the world.

“This is for you” Nolan said and picked a present up from under the tree. You were both in sweats with a cup of coffee each. Those five more minutes turned into an amazing hour of cuddling and having Nolan breathe into your neck, but then Nolan realized it was christmas and suddenly opening gifts seemed really important to him.

You gave him a look, telling him he didn’t have to get you a present, but he only laughed at you. “I wanted to” he explained. Nonetheless, you took the gift from his hands and slowly unwrapped it. The black material inside was unmistakingly a flyers jersey.

A wide smile spread on your face when you saw the name and number. You looked up at him as he watched your reaction, clearly happy the gift wasn’t a slump. “I thought you could wear it to my games?” it came out as a question almost.

“Of course I will” you answered, not really being able to help the thoughts in your mind about how ‘boyfriend’ of him this is. You couldn’t count the times you’d thought about wearing his name and number in your lifetime.

“I would’ve gotten you one earlier but I knew Tom wouldn’t like you wearing it” your heart skipped a beat at his words. “Why?” you asked.

“Well I mean I wouldn’t like it if you came in one of TKs jerseys, eh? I guess it makes sense” Nolan answered. You nodded slowly, choosing not to mentioning anything about how Tom was your boyfriend but Nolan isn’t.  “Besides, he never liked me, so that probably plays a part” he then said. You looked up at him questioning.

“Why do you think he didn’t like you?” you asked, confused since you’ve never heard about this before.

“You didn’t know? He hated me, Y/N. I guess I get it though, but still..” he said, muttering the last part under his breath. “I don’t know. Anyway the feeling was kind of mutual, so..”

You wanted to know more. But knowing Nolan, he wouldn’t want to talk more about this now. You’ve learned to read his body language over the years, so you knew when not to push it. Instead you got up and picked up a box yourself, giving it to him. “Merry christmas” you said.

“When did you have time to get me something?” he asked confused. You laughed and sat down next to him. “I got this months ago, just picked it up at my place yesterday” you explained. Nolan looked surprised but took the gift from your hands.

“Months ago?” he asked, a small smile tugging on his lips. You nodded shyly as he started unwrapping, revealing a jewelry box. Inside he found a golden chain. It took a few seconds before he pieced one and two together, and a smile spread on his face as he looked at you.

“It looks just like the one you lost” he said, grinning. “Yeah, I figured I kinda owe you one, right?” you answered.

You had been fifteen when you’d borrowed a golden chain of his. It was summer and you were going to a party, he was there too. You couldn’t remember why it ended up around your neck, but you do remember being wildly in love with him and the awful feeling in your gut when you realized you’d lost it while swimming. Everyone had gone dipping (some skinny-dipping, Nolan included) and when you got up it was gone. You’d then spent probably thirty minutes in the cold water trying to find it, all while Nolan tried to convince you it was alright. But you knew he was upset, he just refused to let you know that.

“Thanks, I love it. But you didn’t really owe me anymore, we were even. Remember?” he said, and then laughed at your confused expression. He stood up and went to get yet another gift. “Here, it might remind you”

You unwrapped it slowly, this too was a jewelry box. When you opened it you found a necklace as well, but it wasn’t until you saw what was hanging on it that the memories came flooding back. It held your monthstone inside of a golden heart, just like one you had when you were little. You’d always wear it, and one day when you went kayaking on a  school-trip you’d let Nolan keep it in his pocket while you went out on the water. You’d forgotten he had it and that night it was gone.

“So I guess we really are even now, then” you said and laughed. Nolan took the necklace and helped you put it on. Shivers ran down your spine as his fingers gently touched the skin of your neck, you hoped he didn’t notice though. When you turned towards him, his hand went out to grab the monthstone, inspecting it. “I always loved that necklace, you have no idea how bad I felt when I lost it” he said.

“Mortified? Yeah, I know the feeling” you answered, laughing slightly.

“Yeah” he said, dropping the necklace and looking down in his lap. “I thought you’d hate me, it was like the worst day of my life”

“I could never hate you” you answered quietly, but loud enough for him to hear. Your eyes met when he looked up, and for a moment it was like everything else in the world disappeared. You thought he was going to kiss you, but as he leaned in you felt your body turning away. It was something you wanted so bad, but for some reason you panicked. You weren’t sure why, if it was fear or something else.

Nolan dropped his head slightly, one of his arms coming to rest against the back of the couch.

“I know it’s early” he said, matter of factly. You met his eyes again, not sure where he was going. “And I don’t want to push you”

You furrowed your eyebrows, still confused. “What are you saying, Nolan?”

“I make you nervous” he stated, like it was nothing. You were stunned, still not sure where he was taking this conversation. “And you make me nervous” he said. You stayed quiet, your eyes never breaking contact though.

“Alright, listen. All I know is I like you and you like me” he said, one of his hans coming to rest on your knee. It felt like your entire body went from zero to a hundred degrees in just a second, that’s the impact he had on you.

“And we’re good together, fuck it we’re great together!” Nolan said. “I know you feel it too, when we’re in bed, when we’re talking, when we’re doing anything we just fit together. It’s easy, it feels right!”

You couldn’t move, or speak for that matter. Never did you think you’d be sitting on his couch with Nolan confessing his love for you, never in a million years. But here you were, and it was happening, and you couldn’t bring yourself to speak.

He slowly reached his hand up towards your face, afraid you might run away, but you didn’t. His palm touched your cheek and stroked a string of hair away. “I just… I can’t let you run away with someone else again when I know we’re right together. I had to say something” he mumbled.

You reached for his arm, gently grabbing it as you moved closer to him. With your other hand you turned his face towards yours and closed the space between you, kissing him for the very first time.

And just like he said, it was great. You fit together, it just felt right. Like magic.

A few seconds later you pulled back, looking him in the eye to see if that was his reaction as well.

“See? That’s what I was talking about” he whispered, smiling.

“Merry christmas” you whispered back.

”Merry christmas” he answered, before kissing you again.

[gaarfielf]

Not to be that guy but here’s an analysis on LGBT characters/rep in the lupin iii universe nobody asked for. I’m gonna cover Twilight Gemini, Harimou’s Treasure, Angel Tactics, TWCFM, Part 2, Part 3 and Part 5

Twilight Gemini is arguably one of the least popular films of the series pretty much based on the fact it’s just not a good movie. But this ain’t a movie review that’s just the facts. Anyway the villain’s henchman, Sadachiyo, is gay and the movie does not skirt around it at all. Lupin makes several “jokes” about the character being gay and the character is written to be very perverted and evil (obviously because he’s a henchman) but nonetheless very stereotypical to downright offensive (his character wearing lipstick is a little uh). Ultimately, Goemon returns at the very ass-end of the film to stab him directly in the chest and that’s where that story ends. Now, there isn’t much to say about this character because he really was only around for Lupin to make jokes that weren’t funny before dying. Gotta love them yep huh /eye roll/

Harimou’s Treasure gave us the double whammy of not only a bad joke against intersex people and trans women, but also a nazi joke! hooray. The film uses a slur that some may argue “wasn’t a slur back then” but nonetheless leaves the film to have aged terribly. The character...../sighs/ Herr Maphrodite /SIGHS LOUDER/, is once again a huge offensive stereotype and coincidentally, another villain. By the end of the film Fujiko manages to take him down by.... kissing him.... and he’s so repulsed.... that they just... win somehow. It’s really just an unpleasant scene. But luckily the film isn’t hugely popular (in comparison to Secret of Mamo, Cagliostro, Fuma, etc).

Angel Tactics threw in a new idea with a bisexual woman........... who is also a villain. Detecting a pattern yet? Her name is Lady Joe /HUGE SIGH/ and she is shown to be pretty masculine which there isn’t necessarily anything wrong with until you consider that TMS might have argued otherwise, but the film eventually reveals her “true form” (???) where she’s actually really perverted and her outfit changes to be very revealing and “sexy” (TMS wouldn’t know sexy if it bit em in the ass tbh). It’s almost as if TMS associates being gay with being evil and perverted? Wild.

TWCFM is a split audience in this aspect, with a gay character that some believe is pretty accurate representation and others believe is just another TMS classic gay stereotype. Personally speaking, the fact that Oscar was designed to look like a woman (the same head shape, wide hips and skinny body as Fujiko) and also being notably... /excited/ around Zenigata, I disliked the representation. However, other people (gay people specifically b/c why would I ask straight people how they felt about him lol) believe that he’s actually really speaking to them as a gay character. I mention this because I didn’t personally finish TWCFM so I don’t wanna throw him under the bus as a character, but I will say, he is still a villain in the series as made apparent by his strict hate for Fujiko (presumably out of jealousy).

Part 2 gave us a fast one with the Rose of Versailles episode. It was a crossover episode between the two series and TMS decided to do a very interesting take on it where Lupin literally falls in love with a character disguised as a man. In the episode it’s very apparent he has no idea that the character he’s in love with is actually a woman and actually convinces Jigen and Goemon later that it’s not a big deal. Jigen and Goemon by the by, are not cool with their relationship but eventually grow more neutral about it as the episode progresses. Speaking bluntly, this episode is a very wild outlier in Part 2 as an episode which literally outright confirms Lupin as bisexual (or pan, or any degree of not-straight that tickles your fancy). However, it’s often not acknowledged for ??? reasons. Alongside this in Part 2, there is another episode Lupin disguises himself as a woman to seduce a man for his money, only to find that after revealing himself that the man... doesn’t care. They get married in the episode. I don’t know how this goes over peoples head. Granted, Lupin was in it for the money but I think Lupin of all people could’ve come up with a different plan if he really didn’t want to legally marry a man.

Part 3 also gave us something new with various episodes that imply Jigen might swing that way too. Bear with me here but Part 3 delivers /a lot/ of secluded scenes with Jigen outwardly upset that Lupin ditched him for a woman. Scenes where he looks away from women that Lupin are talking to/about, scenes where he leaves the room when there’s women, scenes where he refuses to look at Lupin when he’s with a woman and just generally more outwardly not interested in women compared to previous Parts where he more-or-less ignores them. Previous Parts, Jigen might not be crazy about women but there isn’t really as many strong visuals as their are in part 3 that suggest he’s explicitly attracted to men (though there are scenes in Part 1 and 2 where he quite literally goes into hysterics over Lupin, thinking he’s dead, though take it as you will). Speaking of more visuals surrounding Jigen specifically related to being gay, I’ll bring up the obvious one being the classic Play Bohz scene, where Jigen is very visibly reading a muscle magazine (a kind of magazine that was specifically popular among gay men in the 80s as a more ‘discreet’ way of essentially reading filth) and I mean. That’s pretty concrete. But there’s also other nods to it like him and Lupin smoking under a billboard with two men kissing on it, Jigen telling Goemon he looks cute in women’s clothing, etc. Part 4 even gives us Fujiko implying that Jigen is jealous at Lupin and Rebecca’s wedding which Jigen.... doesn’t respond to.

Part 5 is where TMS reverts back to its old ways. Actually it’s new ways because part 2 and 3 were the 70s and 80s and all these outwardly homophobic movies happened in the late 90s through the 2000s. But nonetheless we get....another... gay.... villain. hooray. again. His name is Albert in case you haven’t watched it yet. Not only that but he is mentioned offhandedly to be gay in one (1) episode before it’s never mentioned again (not exactly what I’d call representation) and the series also doesn’t shy away from gay jokes that purposely make fun of fans for shipping the characters and just in general make fun of gay people. TMS, it’s 2018, can we stop making gay jokes? They aren’t funny. Zenigata pulling his gun on Lupin for making the joke wasn’t funny, Jigen attempting to kick Lupin’s phone out of his hands wasn’t funny, and even the article claiming they were dating wasn’t very funny because it was deadass a joke made at the expense of fans. A wacky gay joke accompanied with hating your fans is a funny way of writing, huh?

In conclusion, why is it that the 70s and 80s somehow handled hinting at these supposed “controversial topics” better than it was in movies made in the 2000s and then rinsed and repeated again in the year 20 fucking 18. I think if Part 2 can have an episode where Lupin deadass flirts and falls in love with a man, Part 5 should have been capable of not writing homophobic characters. and thats the hot but true take of the day.

NOTE: if y’all try to message me to argue keep in mind 1) theres literally nothing straight about Lupin falling in love with a man and Jigen reading a muscle magazine literally known to target gay men and 2) theres nothing you can do to convince me otherwise so you best be ready to swallow that pill and 3) Don’t @ me with ‘bUT lUPIN lIKES wOMAN’ because yeah. no shit. read up on what being bi means before opening your mouth.

[howlnikiforov]

Crystal Snow

Chapter Three: Embarrassed

Pairing: Namjoon x Reader

Word Count: 2841

Previous Chapters: 1, 2

Summary: In a world full of soulmates that can feel the other’s emotions, one would expect to know when their soulmate is hiding a secret

Warnings: mildly graphic description

You thought it was strange that you felt so calm. The air around you was warm and fresh, birds chirping in the distance and insects buzzing around you. It was like a movie. You looked down at his hand, only taking a moment to decide that you wanted to go with him.

His hand was large compared to your petite one, fingers long and nimble just like yours. Your hands fit together like two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. It was strange, you thought, that two people could fit so perfectly. It was a comforting thought nonetheless, that the man beside you was yours and there to help you. Namjoon squeezed your hand as he looked down at you, giving you a knowing smile. You blushed and looked away “Where are we going?” You pondered aloud.

“You’ll see in just a minute.” He replied. You noticed how despite feeling calm and collected, his eyes never stopped scanning your surroundings. He took in the high pitch of the birds chirp, the color of their feathers and their breed. He listened to every step you took, paying attention to how your light footsteps sounded so that in the future he wouldn’t mistake you for any body else. The last thing he wanted was to mistake you as an enemy. He shuddered at the thought of accidentally killing you. This caused you to look up at him “what’s wrong?” You asked simply.

He looked down at you, startled. He had forgotten the the person holding his hand was the one soul on earth that knew what he was feeling. “I’m just thinking” he replied, hoping you wouldn’t push him further.

Nodding, you merely squeezed his hand. Seeing as though the two of you had met a mere twenty minutes ago, it was too soon to press on personal thoughts. You wanted to get to know him more before you did everything couples seem to do.

Often times, soulmates moved quickly. It was typical to skip the dating and just get married. After all if you knew who your soulmate was, why wait? What people failed to realize is that sometimes a soulmate wasn’t who they were made out to be. Sometimes there were horrible secrets kept and other times, though rare, soulmates were only meant to be friends. It was easy to sympathize with those whose soulmate was simply to be their friend. Often times they never married. You hoped that that wouldn’t be the case with Namjoon and you. It didn’t seem likely though seeing the attraction already felt between you.

All of a sudden a young man came running up. Namjoon stopped walking and quickly let go of your hand; it was obvious the newcomer had seen your hands locked together, but he chose to pay no attention to it. The male hand short mint hair and brown eyes. He was tall, not quite as tall as Namjoon was, and quite handsome. He quirked an eyebrow at you, looking up and down as his tongue ran across his bottom lip. Namjoon was quick to step in front of you and block his line of sight.

“Yoongi,” he said “do you need something?” the air was tense as the two looked at each other. It was completely different than it had been when it was just the two of you. Namjoon was tense, as if he had been caught doing something bad. Was being with you wrong? You were just walking and trying to talk. The key word being try as the short conversations you had seemed awkward. At least to you. Though by extension that meant he felt awkward conversing.

The man who you now knew was Yoongi, bowed to Namjoon “Sir, people are asking for you.” He leaned to the side to look at you, giving you a wide smile. You could only shyly smile in return. “Who’s she?” he asked.

“She is the person who baked the cupcake you have on your face.” Namjoon replied, causing Yoongi to burst into loud laughter. Namjoon turned to look at you “We will talk later.” he nodded, more to himself than anything else. You watched as he swiveled around, and walked away. Yoongi stayed behind and stared at you.

“Why were you talking with Mr. Kim?” he asked, compelling you to quirk an eyebrow at him.

“I don’t see why you must know.” you countered.

As you began walking away, Yoongi grabbed your arm, “It’s my business to know everything that man does.” The look he gave you warned that if you didn’t say something you’d soon regret it. However, you knew that the whole soulmate thing would best be kept secret. Jerking your arm out of his grip, you quickly walked back to the business party, leaving Yoongi to stare after you. He swiftly took his phone out of his pocket and began researching you.

It was amazing how much one could find out from a name. Names are a very powerful concept in this world. The name Kim Namjoon was an almighty name that instilled fear in the hearts of men. Well, the men who knew who the real Kim Namjoon was. Most saw him as a CEO but a large portion of the corporate world feared him, knowing he was not a man to be reckoned with. Whereas your name, F/N L/N, simply made people think of popular food competitions. Often it made people begin craving some kind of dessert. Your name was not as impressive upon people’s minds as Namjoon and his followers were. Of course that could also have to do with the fact that in another world, Namjoon was known as “RM”. He did quite a bit of dirty work, being a well known torturer. He had taught himself the best torture methods, learning on the way how to enjoy the screams of his victims.

Yoongi, as he did a brief minute of research, was quick to realize why Namjoon had taken such an interest to you. Scrolling through your wikipedia page, he found a picture of you holding an elegant yet simple blue marble cake. In the picture, your sleeves were rolled up exposing your soul mark. Few people knew what Namjoon’s soul mark was and Yoongi, fortunately for him, was lucky enough to be one of them.

He stared in the direction you had gone, wondering if he should do something about this. In their line of work, soulmates were dangerous. If anyone found out about a soulmate, the partner was sure to disappear only to turn up two days later with their limbs missing. Yoongi should know. He recently kidnapped a male and left him dead on the porch of his target’s house.

Yoongi walked back to the party and stood watch over everyone. He was glad to see that Namjoon was nowhere near you and was in fact talking with the CEO of Soo Industries. Meanwhile you were simply standing by your cupcake display, looking like you were about to start packing up. The event was almost over anyway so it was only natural.

You were happy to see most of your cupcakes gone. As you watched the crowd slowly dissipate, you allowed yourself to eat one of the five leftover cupcakes.Your employees began disassembling the display and as you helped them, you found a piece of paper taped to the bottom of the stand. On it was a set of numbers, presumably a phone number, and three simple words: “call me tonight.” You smiled a little and pocketed the paper.

From the distance, Namjoon’s eyes watched you as he sipped on champagne.

Later that night, after you had closed your shop and gotten home, you took that paper out of your back pocket and looked at it. Your phone laid on the table, unlocked and ready for you to type in the number. You weren’t sure if you wanted to call, thinking texting would be better. You were always too business-like when talking on the phone, or so your best friend said. Still, that paper said to call so you that’s what you did. You dialed the number and put the phone to your ear. Almost immediately someone was answering the phone, “Who are you?” you recognized it as the voice of Yoongi. Suddenly there was a lump in your throat and you regretted calling.

You felt a sudden jolt of excitement from Namjoon as you heard shuffling on the phone. That was when you heard his voice “Y/N,” he breathed “I wasn’t sure you’d actually call.”

You giggled softly as you played with a loose string on your shirt. Before you managed to say something he spoke up again, “Do you wanna go out for coffee?”

In the background you could hear Yoongi say “Sir, I don’t think that’s a good idea.” You heard Namjoon sigh and felt a wave of disappointment pierce you.

“We can meet at my bakery,” you offered, instantly feeling that sadness replaced with hope “it’s closed so no one but us would be there…” you chewed on your lip nervously.

“Brilliant idea! I’ll see you there!” He hung up after a quick goodbye.

You ran a hand through your hair and ran into your room. Shedding your jacket and top, replacing it with a light blue blouse with white flowers scattered around. Donning on a pair of black skinny jeans, a quick look in the mirror told you that you needed to do something with your hair. You didn’t want to do too much with it so you ran a brush through your hair and put it in a high ponytail. Since you lived only half a block from your shop, you decided you’d kill some time by going in and cooking up something special.

Yoongi stared at Namjoon, “What sounds brilliant?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

“We are going to Y/N’s bakery.” He stated, leaving no room for argument as he walked out of the room.

Namjoon had quite the collection of cars. Most being black with darkened windows as to hide himself and any possible passengers he may have. However, for this occasion Namjoon chose an everyday car, leaving the more conspicuous cars for his seven men. He got into the silver 2016 Honda Accord. Opening the garage, he took off, far too excited to be able to get to talk with you.

Unlocking the front door to the bakery, you walked in and turned on the lights. The chairs were on the tables so you went to one close to the counter and took the chairs down. Going into the kitchen, you began taking out the ingredients to make strawberry shortcake. Mixing the baking soda, flour, and sugar, you began singing along to OneRepublic’s “All the Right Moves,” a song that was stuck in your head.

Leaving the cake to bake, you began making the whipped cream that would go along with it. You threw in some previously sliced strawberries to the cream. Glancing at the time, you saw it was now past 10:00pm. Namjoon would be there soon.

Unsure of how Namjoon preferred his coffee, or if he even wanted coffee, you decided to hold off on making any beverages until he arrived. In the meantime, you took the shortcake out of the oven. The bakery filled with the smell of freshly baked cake. The smell mixed with the scent of the strawberries, creating a sensational combination.

After letting it cool for a little while, you began putting the whip cream on the cake, topping it with whole strawberries. You set the cake on the table as well as two white ceramic plates.

Almost as soon as you began cleaning up the mess the bell rang, signaling someone had come in. You walked to the front and was greeted by the sight of Namjoon dressed in a deep purple button up and black slacks. The first two buttons were left undone, exposing a small glimpse of his chest. His brown hair was disheveled yet he somehow made it look stylish. He was breathtaking. “Good evening.” You greeted, walking up to him.

He grinned at you “Good evening! You’ve got a nice place.” he said, looking around. The walls were light blue with white snowflake decals. Fairy lights hung around the walls and chandeliers from the ceiling. The tables were made of white marble and the chairs made of black wood. The colors all contrasted well and gave off the feel of a winter wonderland. Everything seemed to glitter under the lights, including the floor. The pastry display was empty, waiting to be filled with tomorrow’s batches of goods.

“Thank you,” you looked down at your feet for a second then looked back up at your soulmate “would you like some coffee? Or tea?” You offered, leading him to the table you had set up.

“Tea please.” Namjoon sat at the table and stared at the strawberry shortcake, pleasantly surprised. As you went back to make some tea, Namjoon asked, “Did you just make this? It smells amazing.”

“I did actually. I hope you like it” Filling a kettle and putting it on the stove, you lit the fire to let the water boil. You took out two tea cups and put in a bag of peppermint tea, making sure it was all ready for when the water was done. You came back to the table to find that Namjoon had already cut you a slice of the cake and was in the middle of cutting one for himself.

Things felt a lot more comfortable now than at his business party. Perhaps it was simply because of the feel of your bakery, or maybe because now the two of you were alone. At least that’s what you thought. The seven men closest to Namjoon surrounded the area of your bakery, keeping watch for any suspicious activities. Six of the seven were quite confused as to why Namjoon would drive over an hour simply to go to a bakery. The newest addition, Minhyuk, was especially curious. He had yet to find out who the real Namjoon was and was still under the impression that the man was as cruel as can be. Yoongi had stayed quiet about the whole soulmate thing. This was something for Namjoon to announce, not him.

Your laugh filled the silence of the bakery as you watched Namjoon clumsily drop the first bite of his cake onto his right leg. You were quick to provide him with plenty of napkins to clean himself with. At the same time the kettle squealed, screaming that the water was at its boiling point. You sprinted to the back, turning off the stove and taking the kettle to pour the water in the two cups. You walked back to Namjoon, seeing he had composed himself and marginally cleaner than he had been seconds before.

“So what inspired the name of your bakery?” Namjoon asked “Why ‘Winter Serendipity’?”

“Well, it’s simple really. Because of the mark we share, I’ve always had an obsession with the season and often times you have provided me with a sense of peace, happiness and safety, hence serendipity.” You blushed as you explained, slightly embarrassed to say he was a large part of your inspiration for the name.

He gave you a soft smile, exposing his dimples. Without thinking you reached across the table and poked his dimples, causing his smile to widen into a large grin. He laughed softly, watching your face turn redder than the strawberries on the cake. You shrieked and immediately stood, embarrassed. He found your actions quite endearing. He watched as you ran off to the back, amused by the embarrassment you were feeling.

You took deep breaths, willing for the redness to disappear as you grabbed the two tea cups. You brought them to the table, turning to walk back towards the kitchen. However, Namjoon prevented you from walking away by standing and grabbing your wrist. He pulled you to his body and wrapped his strong arms around your frame. He squeezed you to him, a smile seemingly to have permanently etched itself onto his face. “You are beyond adorable.” He said endearingly.

His comment only made you blush more. You were thankful he couldn’t see your face. All too soon he let go of you, sitting back down in his chair. You had forgotten why you were going back to the kitchen so you sat down as well. When you sipped on your tea your eyes widened. Swallowing your gulp you exclaimed “Sugar! That’s what I needed!’ You stood and ran back, bringing a container of sugar out. Namjoon laughed at your antics, already seeming to fall into the dangerous trap of love.

The rest of the night continued like that, with the two of you constantly laughing at each other while getting to know the other’s personality. You spent hours talking and it wasn’t until it was 1:06AM that you finally bade each other goodnight.

[dazingsky]

Hinting (Reddie)

HELLO I’VE BEEN SUPER BUSY BUT HERE I AMMMM

summary: Hi can I get a richie x reader request? Where she's new and richie see her and is like damn and it turns out she is pretty much richie. This leads to clapback wars and the Losers constantly tease richie about his crush. One day the bickering becomes so much one of the Losers blurts out their feelings. Blushy adorableness ensues.

I CHANGED IT TO REDDIE, I COULDNT NOT IM SORRY HDHSBSJD

Anyway, word count: 1,783

Please leave me requests and enjoy this!

Richie Tozier’s friend group wasn’t exactly large. But it wasn’t exactly small. It was the perfect size. And Richie loved his friends. More than anything, each in their own way.

Richie loved Ben because he had a way of being happy no matter what. He always seemed in the mood to cheer up Richie. Ben wrote poetry, and shared his poems with the group. He talked about his old town, and complained about how he hadn’t moved to Derry quicker, and met the Losers.

Richie loved Beverly because she was always willing to smoke with Richie. Of course he loved her for other reasons, but that was a big up. Beverly was good with secrets as well though. Beverly was the first person Richie told when he realised he liked girls and boys. Beverly had laughed, and said “same”, whilst grinning at Richie. Richie loved her for not treating him differently, although none of the other boys judged him either.

Richie loved Mike because Mike was always cracking subtle jokes. He was good for a laugh. But he could also be ridiculously serious, at any time. Mike also knew a lot about food. He cooked for the group a lot, especially around the holidays. Full course meals. And deserts. It was amazing. It was heavenly food. Richie thought he could be a chef with the amount of knowledge of food, although Mike wanted to be a vet.

Richie loved Bill because he was outgoing, even though he had a stutter. Bill was also very good at art, and writing. He often wrote stories about the group, and painted pictures for each of the member of the group. And Bill was easy to talk to. About anything. Like Beverly.

And Richie loved Stan. Stan was Richie’s favourite member of the group. He was stern, and intelligent, and always managed to make Richie laugh. He made profoundly subtle jokes, which always managed to crack Richie up. Richie and Stanley had been friends forever, basically. And that’s why Richie trusted him enough with his ‘personal’ information.

He shouldn't have.

He had sat down, in Stan’s living room, beside Stan, and began the confession. “You know that new kid, in our year, Eddie?” Stanley had nodded slowly, not fully paying attention. The tv was playing cartoons, which were much more interesting to Stanley than most of what Richie had to say. “I think I like him..” Richie blurted.

This caught Stan’s attention. He turned to look at Richie, trying to remember everything about Eddie, so he could tease Richie. “You like the kid who wear’s pale pink jumpers, and carries around strawberry scented hand sanitiser?” Stan asked, a small smirk forming on his face, as he took in Richie’s appearance. A pink floyd tank top, black skinny jeans, a black hoodie, and a pair of black doc martins. And his black hair was a mess. “You.”

“Shut up.” Richie snapped, feeling a blush form on his face. Stanley smirked, a smug look on his face. “I don’t know what it is about him, but he’s just cute. And I don't know.” Richie sighed, rolling his eyes at Stanley.

“That’s cute Rich, a bit strange, but cute nonetheless.” Stanley laughed, as Richie hit his arm. “You have to admit, it’s kinda weird though. You guys are, like, polar opposites! Plus I’ve known you basically your entire life, and in your entire 16 years you’ve never liked anyone.” Richie shrugged, feeling embarrassed. He didn’t like talking about his personal feeling with Stan. Or anyone, for that matter. But he felt like he needed to tell someone. And Stan was the person he had chosen. Although now he was regretting it. “It’s no big deal, he probably isn't gay.”

“He’s completely gay. Through and through. One hundred percent.” Richie rose an eyebrow at Stan, causing the boy to shrug. “Have you seen him? He’s definitely gay.” Stanley laughed, again. “Do the others know?”

“No you’re the only person I’ve told.” Stan nodded slowly, thinking for a second.

“We should invite him to Bill’s on Saturday.” Stan suggested. “It’d be fun. Plus you don’t even have to invite him, if you feel nervous, I will! It’ll work like a charm!” Richie nodded slowly, although he had no idea what he had gotten himself into.

When Saturday rolled around, Richie was terrified. Stan had asked the other losers if it was okay for Eddie to come, and by the way Stan not so subtly hinted, they had all said yes so they could see Richie’s reactions throughout the evening. Friday afternoon, after biology, Stan had walked with Eddie and mentioned the movie day that Bill was hosting the following day. Eddie had agreed to come, almost immediately, and had grinned at Stan.

“He seems like a really nice guy.” Stan had said, in a bored tone, as he read through a magazine that had been lying on Bill’s coffee table. Stan had made himself at home in Bill’s house, almost as soon as soon as he’d walked in. Stan and Bill were very close though. Probably because they’re secretly in love.

“He is. He’s in my Math’s class, and he’s incredibly polite to the teachers.” Ben said, from his place on the floor. Richie turned to look at him, nodding slowly. “Exact opposite of you, Richie.” Ben teased.

Richie mumbled a quiet ‘shut up, Ben,’ and continued pacing. He had been doing that since he arrived at Bill’s a half hour ago. Bill had requested he stopped pacing around 5 times, but Richie continued.

“It’s so cute to see Richie this nervous!” Bev laughed, placing a hand on Richie’s shoulder, and turning him to face her. “Calm down. He’s just coming over to hang out.”

“What if he hates me?!” Richie was practically shaking. And then the doorbell rang. “Fuck.” Richie shrieked, as Beverly pushed him towards the door. Richie was shaking even ore now, nerves ripping through his body. He bit his lip, harshly, reaching his shaking hand out to grab the door handle.

Richie swiftly swung the door open, and came face to face with Eddie Kasobrak. Eddie looked straight back at Richie, opening his mouth slowly. “Is this Bill’s house?” Richie nodded quickly, in response to Eddie’s question.

“Come in!” Richie said quickly, stepping back to let the smaller boy into the house. Eddie walked inside slowly, looking around. Every one of the losers were stood at the entrance to Bill’s living room, watching the boys, intently.

Eddie looked over at the group assembled, in the door frame. “Hi.” He muttered, quietly. Everyone seemed to fall back into their normal selves, instead of staring at the boys. Beverly came over, greeting Eddie, which allowed Richie to slip away unnoticed.

“You need to calm down.” Stanley hissed at Richie, shaking his head. “Get yourself under control.”

Richie eventually did calm down. He went back to being his usual self. He sat on the floor, during the first movie, and made his usual crude remarks abut different things. Everything seemed to be going okay, until the losers began making jokes.

They were watching the main character from the film confess his love to the other main character. He had everything planned. He was going to sit the girl down, and say he couldn't live without her. There was a laugh from one of the couches, and then there were whispers throughout the group. Until, finally, a hand landed on Richie’s shoulder, and a daring Mike leaned down, laughing “Man, thats just like you” in Richie’s ear. Richie rolled his eyes, attempting to ignore Mike, but these jokes continued.

At first they were sightly subtle, but they continued to get more out there, until Ben casually said, “I think Richie should just tell him.” Richie immediately felt the flush crawl up his neck, continuing until it hit his face. Richie looked at Eddie from the side of his eye, watching as Eddie looked at the others on the couch, biting his lip. He knew. Those fuckers had basically just outed me, completely, to the boy who had only been sat with us for an hour. Richie thought. He instantly stood up, almost falling over his damn feet, and quickly made his way over to Bill’s front door. “I need some air.” He lied, and slammed the door shut after him.

He sat down, on Bill’s porch steps, and stared ahead of him. Any chances he had with Eddie had been flung out the window, because of Ben’s inability to keep his damn mouth shut. Richie stared off into the distance, biting his lip. He sighed loudly, when he heard the door behind him open and shut.

“Go away, I’m not in the mood, Stanley.” Richie snapped, without turning around. Stanley always tried to talk him down after he got pissed off.

“It’s not Stanley..” A quiet voice said, causing Richie to turn around. He looked up, at Eddie, who seemed to be looming over him. “Can I sit?”

Richie nodded slowly, watching Eddie walk down the first step, and sit down beside Richie. The pair sat in silence for a moment. Richie didn’t know how to even strike up a conversation with the boy beside him, so they just sat in silence. Until Eddie broke it.

“Do you like me?” Eddie asked, slowly. It was a blunt question, but there was genuine curiosity in Eddie’s voice. Richie turned slightly, looking at Eddie, with almost wide eyes. “Do you?” Eddie asked again.

“Yes..” Richie said quietly, looking down at his lap.

“Why?”

Richie looked at Eddie again, quickly. Eddie’s face was full of curiosity again, and he looked adorable. “You’re cute.. Really cute, Ed’s.” Richie said the nickname as if he had said it 100 times before, even though he had never said it before. He didn’t even know where it came from.

“We’ve never even talked before.” Eddie said, a blush forming on his cheeks, his eyes still wide. “How do you even know you like me..?”

“I just do.” Richie shrugged, fiddling with his fingers. His eyes were still focused on Eddie’s. So focused, in fact, that he didn't even notice Eddie leaning in, until Eddie’s eyes were closed, and his lips were pressed to Richie’s.

And then Richie’s eyes fluttered closed, and he found himself kissing back. And it was gentle, and slow. And to Richie it felt right. And he really hoped it felt right to Eddie, as well. Richie found himself pulling away, reluctantly, to find out why Eddie had kissed Richie.

“I do too.” Eddie shrugged, blushing more than before, and grinning. And Richie couldn't help but grin as well, leaning in to kiss the boy, again.

[5hfanfiction]

Why Did I Get Married?

Part Six: Feliz Navidad

(A/N) A holiday chapter because it’s the holidays. MERRY CHRISTMAS. FELIZ NAVIDAD. JOYEUX NOËL!! HAPPY NEW YEAR!! Hope you guys have a good one! 🦋

Lauren was nervous. It was their first Christmas together as a family since her infidelity. Camila hadn’t spent much holidays home since, which definitely took a toll on their daughter, but on those holidays, the brunette had always put aside time to FaceTime her family. Even though she did not want to be around her wife, she didn’t want to disappoint her daughter too much.

Seeing as it was their first Christmas since the incident, Lauren hadn’t been sure if she should’ve gotten her wife a gift, but she still did. It was a simple bracelet with a jewel encrusted infinity sign located at the middle of it. It wasn’t much, but when she saw it, it brought back memories of one of the many dates they had went on.

The woman stopped in front of her wife’s bedroom door, she took a deep breath then knocked. Camila opened the door not a moment later.

“Lauren?” she rubbed at her eyes lazily. “Is Izzy up as yet?”

She couldn’t help but admire the way her wife looked so effortlessly beautiful even though she had just woken up. “No. It’s only 5am. I just wanted to give you something before the madness begins.”

Camila chuckled. “Oh before Maggie arrives?”

Lauren smiled and nodded. The brunette stepped aside and allowed her wife to enter her bedroom. Camila sat on the edge of the bed and patted a spot not too far off from where she was.

The raven haired woman took the box out of her pocket and gave it to her wife. “I um..I know we’re not exactly like how we used to be, but I couldn’t not get you something for Christmas.” Camila stared at the box in disbelief. She did get her wife something, but she had expected to not get anything in return.

Why would Lauren even give her anything? She had treated the woman terribly over the past year even though to Camila, she felt as though her wife deserved it. “Open it.”

And she did. The moment her eyes were laid on the bracelet, that’s when she knew exactly where the gift idea came from. “Toy Story,” she laughed softly.

“To Infinity and Beyond,” they said at the same time and exchanged shy smiles at each other.

The story behind this was that, on many of their many dates, Camila took Lauren to watch Toy Story because she had never seen it. How could she not? It was an iconic childhood movie. But on that date, Camila had asked Lauren to be her girlfriend. She didn’t need to go on countless dates to know that this was the one for her. She just knew and she took her shot and years later, they ended up getting married. They promised each other an ‘Infinity and Beyond’ but now? They weren’t exactly sure if that was going to happen.

“Do you like it?” Lauren asked timidly as she looked at her wife whose eyes were glued on the gift.

Camila nodded. “I love it. Thank you, Laur. It’s really sweet. Can you help me put it on?”

The woman scooted a bit closer to help her wife with the bracelet, after doing so, both women had only just realised how close their faces were. Camila’s eyes drifted down to her wife’s plump red covered lips before lazily moving back up to her eyes. Lauren noticed this but she shook her head and backed away.

“I um..there you go,” she cleared her throat awkwardly. “I should probably um get ready for Izzy. She’ll be awake soon and ready for her presents.”

The brunette nodded dumbly and watched as her wife walked towards her door. Was she about to kiss her? Camila had promised herself that she wouldn’t get involved Lauren because to her, the last person her wife had kissed was Hailee. And she wasn’t about to kiss her wife’s 'contaminated’ lips. “Wait, Lauren. I have something for you too,” the green eyed woman stopped and turned around. “I forgot, but I got you a gift.” She stood up quickly and went to rummage through her closet looking the box she didn’t have time to wrap as yet. “Here you go.”

Lauren took the box from her wife and stared at the box dumbly. “Camz…” she breathed out. “This is a fucking Hasselblad H5D 200MS,” she paused. “Camz, a fucking Hasselblad H5D 200MS. This costs a fortune! Why did you buy this? Not that I don’t love it because fuck I do! But what the hell! It costs a fortune!”

Camila laughed heartily before opening the box and handing the camera to her wife. “It’s not that expensive, Lauren. Well I can’t put a price on your happiness. Your reaction is priceless.”

The photographer engulfed her wife in a hug for a few seconds. “Thank you so much, Camz. I really love it and appreciate it.”

“I’m glad you do,” the singer smiled softly. Truth be told, it was rather difficult for Camila to find this camera. She remembered Lauren constantly talking about it but she never got around to actually buying it because she found the price to be ridiculous. After searching for weeks, she stumbled upon a store that sold it and immediately snatched it up. She didn’t care about the price, she just knew that the gift would’ve brought her wife joy.

***

Izzy had just finished opening up her last present; which was a remote control toy truck she saw and just had to get, whilst her parents sat in their matching family pyjamas and held a cup of chocolate with the tiny marshmallows in it.  

“Thank you for the presents, Mummy and Mama! I love them all and I love you too!” she got up from the floor and jumped on the sofa to sit between her parents. She placed a kissed on both of her mothers’ cheeks and grabbed the cup of hot chocolate Camila gave her.

“But mija, Santa brought these gifts for you. Didn’t he, Laur?”

Lauren laughed and shook her head. “She doesn’t believe in Santa. She insists that it’s impossible to have a reindeer with a red nose that glows.”

“What if he has a terrible cold, princesa?” the brunette asked her daughter who had just gulped down her chocolate and now possessed a hot chocolate moustache.

Izzy shook her head and giggled. “No, mama! My nose doesn’t glow when I have a cold!”

The young mother kinked an eyebrow and gasped at her daughter. “It doesn’t? But I thought it did!”

Lauren looked on at the interaction between her wife and their daughter. It always warmed her heart when she saw the improvement in their relationship over the past few weeks that Camila had came back home. Izzy had been a lot happier now that her other mother was home, especially for the holidays. She still had some doubt that her mother would just disappear without telling her goodbye, so occasionally when both her parents were asleep, she would sneak into Camila’s room just to ensure that she was still there.

A loud rapping on their front door broke the family out of their little moment. A megaphone went off and it was none other than Maggie Jauregui behind the interruption.

“THE OWNER OF THE WHITE SEDAN, YOU LEFT YOUR LIGHTS ON.”

“WHAT? ARE YOU SAYING THAT I’M MAKING A LOT OF NOISE AND PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO SLEEP?!”

“YOU’RE SO OBSESSED WITH YOURSELF, MAYBE YOU SHOULD UNDRESS WITH YOURSELF.”

“HI JESSICA! MERRY CHRISTMAS!! HOPE SANTA DROPPED COAL IN YOUR STOCKINGS YOU FUCKING, PUTA!”

Lauren snorted loudly but then she realised that her sister had just used a bad word, but Izzy seemed oblivious as she was already up and charged at their front door to open it for her aunt.

“HOLY SHIT YOU’RE CUTE! MY NUMBER IS 305 555 7623. CALL ME ANYTIME CUTIE.”

Camila facepalmed herself, “Why did we invite her again?” She looked at her wife who laughed loudly.

“We didn’t invite her,” she stood up and trailed behind their daughter. “She invited herself.”

When Lauren opened the door, she was greeted to her younger sister, who was clad in a red sweater and red ripped skinny jeans with a Santa hat atop her head, along with a three gifts in hand and a megaphone in the other.

She grinned cheekily, “Feliz Navidad, hermana.” Lauren threw an arm over her sister’s shoulder. Even though she was extremely annoying and super extra, they loved each other dearly.

“Hi, Auntie Maggie! Feliz Navidad. You look like a prettier Santa,” Izzy beamed at her aunt who handed off the gifts to her sister.

Maggie her up into her arms and placing various kisses on her face, “Aw! That’s so sweet, mija. Don’t you look adorable. Come on, let’s go open my present!” They entered the living room where Camila and Lauren were already sitting. “CAMZII!! Merry Christmas, babe.”

“Merry Christmas, you annoying piece of S-H-I-T,” the brunette spelt out the last word because of her daughter’s presence. The sister in laws exchanged hugs and kisses.

The younger Jauregui sister placed the respective gifts on her relatives laps. “They don’t call me Santa’s little helper for nothing.”

“No one calls you that, Maggie,” Lauren rolled her eyes while trying to suppress a laugh. “I didn’t get you anything though because being sisters with me is a gift.”

Maggie threw a pillow at her sister, who dodged it effortlessly. “If you ask me, that’s one of the worse gifts in the history of gifts.”

“She’s kidding, Mags. Your gift is under the tree. Izzy, baby? Can you give it to your auntie?” Camila asked her daughter who was enthralled by her new iPad that she just got. “IZZY!”

“Huh?” The child asked in confusion. “Oh. Yeah,” she crawled under the tree and handed it to Maggie. “Here you go.” The child smiled and went back to staring at the iPad.

“We’re going to have to lay down some ground rules for that,” Lauren laughed. “Open the envelope, loser.”

Maggie tore open the envelope and two tickets to a G-Eazy concert fell out. “OH MY FUC,” Camila glared at her, “…FRENCH FRIES!! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!” She threw herself on top of her sister and wife. “Thank you. Thank you. You guys know how much I’m in love with G-Eazy! Watch out Halsey, I’m coming for your man.”

Camila and Lauren laughed loudly and silently questioned what was wrong with Maggie. Was she on drugs? Or was she dropped on her head as a child? Who knew. But they still loved her nonetheless.

“Mama?” Lauren turned her direction to her daughter. “Can you help me set it up?” Izzy held up her new iPad. The child’s mother laughed and went to sit on the floor next to her.

Camila and Lauren decided against having their relatives over for Christmas, just to have the three of them. But once Maggie had heard that her sister in law was going to be home for the holidays, she invited herself over. The Jauregui-Cabellos ended up spending a lot of time together over the holiday season since their daughter got off from school.

They went Christmas tree hunting and unfortunately for Lauren, she had to do the cutting down of the tree whilst her wife and daughter stood on the sidelines and watched her. When they went carolling, Camila led them in some traditional Christmas songs despite Lauren’s protest because she hated singing. And finally, they decorated the house together. It had been the most amount of time they’ve ever spent together in quite some years.

The light in little Isabella’s eyes when she was hanging around with both her parents, was enough to melt your heart. She was attached to Camila no matter where they went.

Maggie nudged Camila’s shoulder. “So look at you, being such a great mom. Spending time with your kiddd.”

The brunette rolled her eyes. “Are you implying that I wasn’t a great mom before?”

The model snorted loudly. “Camilita, Camilita…” she paused and shook her head dramatically, “As much as I love you, you were a horrible mother.” The mother smacked her upside the head. “Oh my god! Why does everyone keep doing me that?!”

“Because you say dumb shit, Maggie. When did this happen?”

She pouted and sighed heavily. “I was talking to one of my buddies about Pretty Little Liars and she said I was being a child.”

“You are a child, but I love you either way,” Camila threw her hand over the woman.

They hadn’t realised that Lauren was looking on at the interaction. How was it so easy for Camila to tell Maggie that she loved her, when she couldn’t tell her own wife that? She understood why because Maggie didn’t cheat on her, but at the same time it still hurts.

“There you go, princesa. But you can’t stay on it longer than an hour okay?” Izzy nodded happily and went to download random nonsensical games that little children enjoy. “So Maggie..”

The younger Jauregui turned to look at her sister with a kinked eyebrow, “Yes bitch?” She rubbed the back of her head, “Okay, y'all need to stop with that shit. Obscene flows outta my mouth. I can’t help it.”

Camila shook her head laughing.

“Anyway, why didn’t you spend the holidays with mom and dad?” Lauren asked. It had been some time since the entire Jauregui family spent the holidays together, mainly due to the busy schedules of their daughters. But their parents didn’t mind, as long as their daughters were doing what they loved.

Maggie shrugged. “Well, I guess with the divorce and all that, I don’t really want to be around them,” she mindlessly picked at the rips in her jeans.

Their parents marriage was something both girls had idolised. They were always so in love, well so it seemed. But eventually the marriage seemed to fizzle out, and their parents seemed to work better as friends instead of husband and wife. There were no signs of any infidelity, but sometimes forever isn’t forever and you just have to accept that.

Lauren nodded. “Are you okay? I know it can be hard because they’ve been together so long.” Camila decided against third wheeling in the sister-sister moment and excused herself to the kitchen to start cooking lunch.

She sighed heavily and shrugged again. “I guess it’s just hard but I’ll be okay.”

The photographer stood up from the floor and sat next to her sister on the couch. “Hey, Mags, you know you can always talk to me right? I know I can be busy sometimes and I may act like a pendeja but you’re my annoying sister and I love you.”

“I love you too, you piece of shit,” Maggie laughed and pulled her sister into a hug. “Can I tell you something?”

Lauren nodded.

“Don’t give up on Camila. I know it seems like things are working just fine right now as friends or whatever, but everyone in hell and back, knows that you two didn’t meet to just be friends. You’re married, you have a kid, you both fucked up, but it’s not the end just yet,” she punched her sister in the shoulder softly. “Camren is real.”

Her sister laughed. “I won’t give up on her. I do love her, I know it doesn’t seem like that after everything but I do.”

“Make her see that.”

“I will,” she ruffled her sister’s hair. “Come on, loser. Let’s go help Camila cook before she burns down the house.”

The brunette stuck her head back into the living room, “I heard that! But I could really use the help. I don’t have any intentions of killing Izzy.”

Maggie gasped in faux hurt. “But you have intentions of killing your wife and your loving sister in law? I see how it is. It’s your own people. Smh.”

“You don’t say 'Smh’, Mags. You just do it,” Lauren rolled her eyes. “And before you say anything, yes, I’m advertising for Nike.”

The model laughed and followed the couple back intro the kitchen. They cooked a traditional Mexican-Cuban lunch. Izzy came to join the party a couple minutes later. She and her mother stood on the side-lines and occasionally stirred a pot or buttered a dish. The family laughed and told embarrassing stories.

It had been such a long time since the house felt like a home. Maybe it was Camila being at home or the fact that things seemed to be going 'okay’ for the time being.

***

“Wanna live this night forever ¡Cómo te quiero! Bailamos! ¡Cómo te quiero! Te quiero amor mío ¡Cómo te quiero!” Maggie sang through the karaoke machine as the song came to an end. She did a dramatic bow and hopped off the table. “Y'all I think I deserve a Grammy or something. I’m gonna give up modelling and become a singer. Watch out Camzii, I’m coming for you,” she winked.

Camila shook her head and laughed. “Your career would be non-existent….just like it is right now.”

“Ooohhh burrrnnn,” Lauren encouraged her wife. “Do you want me to call 911?”

Maggie flipped them both off and stalked off to grab some alcohol. Something about needing it to deal with the couple. “Y'all can shove it.”

“She’s such a baby,” Camila laughed and began to flip through songs. “Do you want to do a duet?”

Her wife shrugged. “Sure. As long as you don’t steal all the solos.” Camila glared at her. “Hey, I’m just saying, if we were to ever form a band or something, the fans might only get to hear my breathing.”

The singer pouted and crossed her arms, “You don’t even like to sing!”

“I’m just messing with you, amor,” she kissed her on the cheek. “Come on, just hit something random and we’ll go with the flow.”

Camila picked a random song and grabbed a mic, Maggie stepped back outside with a beer in hand as she looked on, “Life was great, wouldn’t change a thing, I had it all but with you I had more, but out of nowhere out of the blue, our love turned into a war. Now you’re gone, you moved on, and I hate the way I’m feeling,” the brunette’s angelic voice flowed through the speakers, the amount of passion that she had every time she sung was enough for you to feel the raw emotions every time you heard her.

“Now the only way I know that I can get you off my mind, to keep a bottle so close, try to leave it all behind. And I couldn’t get enough. Girl, I’m drowning drunk in love. I used to think you’d never say it’s over, I used to love you sober. I used to love you sober,” Lauren’s husky voice complimented Camila’s well. Even though she disliked singing, she was really good at it. As she sang the lyrics, she couldn’t help but feel a pang in her chest. Was this a random song or did Camila intentionally choose this?

It was the brunette’s turn to sing next, as she stared at the lyrics, her eyes began to glisten, “I’m on the floor cursing at the door. Broken hearted with a pounding head. And I know I got to let you go. So the liquor helps me forget, your name, your face,” her voice started to break. “This pain I can’t erase."  She looked directly in Lauren’s green eyes and whispered the last part. That was it, the tears began. She dropped the microphone and ran off.

Maggie watched as she dashed off.

"CAMZ!” Lauren called after her and began running to where she left but her sister grabbed her by the arm. “Let go of me, Maggie.”

She shook her head 'no’. “That’s not a good idea, Lauren. She needs to be alone right now.”

“What do you mean?! You’re the one who told me not to give up on her!”

“I know what I said, Lauren but damn it! She needs to deal with this right now by herself. Just go check on Izzy. I’ll go check on her,” Maggie blocked her sister’s path and held the door to the house open. “Lauren. Please.” She sighed heavily before walking away.

***

Camila was sitting on the curb a distance off from their house with her head buried in between her knees. She didn’t look up when she heard footsteps. “Lauren, please just leave me alone.”

“Well too bad it’s not, Lauren so I’m not going to leave you alone,” Maggie sat next to the woman and sipped on her beer casually looking at the passing cars. They didn’t say anything to each other. Camila kept sniffling until she stopped and raised her head to look at her sister in law. “You all good there, you cry baby?”

She sighed and wiped her eyes. “I am. Now. I guess.”

“Want some?” Maggie gestured at her beer. Camila shrugged and took a mouthful before giving her it back. “What was all that about back there?”

The singer pinched the bridge of her nose, “Do you think I’m overreacting? I mean it just was a kiss. A drunk one at that, but I can’t seem to let it go. Maybe it’s because I never would’ve done that to her. I don’t know but it just hurts.”

“I don’t know, to be honest. Everyone reacts differently,” she shrugged. “I probably wouldn’t have cared if my…whoever kissed someone else. But your feelings are justifiable. So you shouldn’t feel bad, Camzii.” Maggie took a swing of her beer. “I’m probably not the best person to even give you relationship advice because I’ve only ever been in one serious relationship and that lasted for a little less than two years, but sometimes, even if it hurts, you have to let things go if you want it to work out. I don’t know what’s going on in that head of yours and neither in your heart, but I know you still love her.”

The woman was right, but how was she to let this go? She didn’t exactly hate her wife, and she never stopped loving her. Camila was just hurt. It was just a kiss and maybe she was in fact overreacting, but it didn’t feel like that to her. They made a vow to each other, the ring that they both wear on their fingers, that was the seal to the commitment.

And Lauren broke it.

Meanwhile, Lauren was sitting on the sofa with her head in her hands. Everything had seemed to be going great, what happened to have ruined their day? At least, Izzy hadn’t been up to see what had happened. She didn’t want their daughter to have to deal with what was going on between them.

She heard a phone buzz and blindly reached out and grabbed it. That’s when she realised it wasn’t her phone but the text message made her heart sink.

Wifey: Merry Christmas, Babeeee🌲 Wish we could spend the holidays together :( But I hope you have a great one! Kiss little Camzi for me. Love you, babe 💕

It was Ariana Grande.

One of Camila’s oldest friends in the industry. Lauren had met her a few times and found that the woman was a bit too touchy with her wife. She had told her wife about it but Camila said that they were just friends, and that she shouldn’t be jealous because she loved her and not Ariana. But she couldn’t control the jealousy that she felt every time both singers interacted with one another.

She sighed heavily and flung Camila’s phone away, without smashing it of course because an iPhone costs the blood of your enemies, one year of college tuition and your soul.

Lauren stood up from the sofa and dragged herself upstairs to her bedroom. After changing out of her clothing, she peered out the window and saw that Camila and Maggie were entering the backyard. She decided against going down there and asking her wife if she was okay.

Hopefully things would get better soon. They needed to.

***

Another update so quick? Damn. I must really like y'all. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter. Enjoy your holidays, losers.😆

[my-emotional-self]

Let Me Protect You

Pairings: Chris Evans x OFC Emilia

Chapter: One

Words: 1,745

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Swearing

Trigger Warning: Self-Harm

Summary: After Emilia’s fiance cheats on her, she moves to California to live with her brother Eric, who just so happens to be good friends with Chris Evans. Follow Emilia and her roller coaster life through heartbreak, love and emotional trauma.  Will Emilia choose to let Chris into her heart, or will she remain broken and alone forever?

A/N: There is not much dialogue in this chapter, as we are still diving into Emilia a little bit more.  I can’t promise this is any good as it is only  my first chapter of a fanfic series! But I promise to do my best.

 The open road. Nothing but your thoughts and some music to keep you company for the 28 hour drive ahead of you.  Maybe not the best idea after only find out your fiancé cheated on you two days earlier.  You probably should have given yourself more time to calm down and gather yourself, but you being the stubborn woman you were, knew you had to get out as soon as possible.  Through therapy sessions growing up, you were told you were sensitive, as if you didn’t know that.  Coming to terms with being sensitive to emotions was hard, seeing as your family always judged you for being too sensitive growing up.  Hey, you couldn’t help the way you were born right?  At least you were able to feel emotions on a deeper connection than others.  But that was also the very downside of it too.  

2 Days Earlier

“Emilia, how is my baby sister doing?” my brother Eric asks over the phone.

“Not so g..good” I tried and miserably failed to say.  The tears and sobbing making my voice shake.  

“Hey Em, what’s wrong?” I heard the concern etched in his voice.  

“Charlie has been cheating on me, for months apparently”.  My heart breaking even more as I come to realize how true it becomes, just saying those words out loud.  

“Fuck Emilia, I’m so sorry to hear that.  I always thought Charlie was a douche bag.  He’s lucky I’m not there right now.  He wouldn’t be able to see through his eyes how much he fucked up after I would have beaten him”.

“Thanks Eric, I knew I could count on you to stand behind me.  You have always been there for me when I needed you.  I just wish you were here with me right now.  I could really use one of your famous hugs right now”.  A small chuckle falls from my lips, but it was something nonetheless.   I didn’t know how long it would be before I gave a genuine laugh or smile again.  

“Hey listen, I have an idea Em.  Why don’t you move out here with me?  I’m all alone in this house.  Hell, you can have the guest house if you want.  You need to get away and make a fresh start.  Why not start all over in a new city, a new state?” he mentioned, with hope in his tone.  

You sit and ponder his idea for a few minutes.  You really didn’t have anything tying you down here.  Your father remarried many years ago and you were never really close to your extended family.  You have always been the black sheep of your family.  Shopping at Hot Topic and wearing black more times than anything. You weren’t a Goth or anything of that sort, you just liked the color black, and skulls, a lot.  While you had never gone to visit your brother yet (seeing as he had only been out there a little over a year) he did send you videos and pictures of his house.  Let’s just say, he is doing well for himself.  You knew he was a publicist for a celebrity, but you never bothered to ask him, as you weren’t one for gossip and didn’t want to intrude into his life.

“You know what, fuck it, I’m moving to LA” you said with a smile.

Chris P.O.V

Eric and I were playing Call of Duty at his house when he got a phone call.  From the moment he picked up the phone, I knew it was his sister Emilia on the other end.  He talks about her just the way I talk about my siblings.  Eric and I have been pretty good buddies ever since he moved out here and became Frank Grillo’s publicist.  I met Eric at party for Marvel cast members because Frank had brought him.  We hit it off pretty fast, having a lot in common. He talked about how much he missed his sister, and I could relate to that.  Sure I see Scott more often than not since he lives out here in LA, but I miss my sisters like crazy.  We just both understand that sibling bond.  

He didn’t get up and leave when he took the call, so I heard pretty much all of it.  I didn’t even know Emilia and my heart broke for her. No person deserves to be cheated on. I perked up when I heard Eric ask her to move out here and live with him.  I knew it would make him ecstatic to have his younger sister out here.

When he got off the phone, he was grinning like the Cheshire cat.

“I don’t even know what to ask.  The start of the phone call didn’t sound too good, but your smile says something different” I said with a laugh.

“He is such a fucking asshole.  I swear man, if I was there when this shit happened, I would be in jail right now. I knew that guy was no good, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt”.

“I’m sorry bud; I know how much your sister means to you.  I wouldn’t even know how to handle that situation if something like that happened to Carly or Shanna”.

“Yeah, but at least I convinced her to move out here with me.  She’s had so much shit happen to her the last few months, she really needs to just start over, start fresh.  She’s going to drive here in two days with as much stuff as she can fit in her Jeep. My dad will ship anything else she needs.”

“Something tells me there is more you want to say about all of this” I say with my eyebrows raised and a suspicious smirk on my lips.  

“She is a huge fan of you dude!  It started out as her being a fan of the Captain America comics, and she geeked out pretty bad when it was announced they were making movies.  Ever since you put on the Cap suit, she’s been your fan.  I’m hoping that will be a big step in cheering her up when she gets out here”.

“You didn’t tell her that you know me, after all these months?  Isn’t she going to get mad at you for not saying anything?”

“Now that you mention it, I really hope she doesn’t get mad at me.  Look, it will be good for her to get out, meet new people, even though some of them will be celebrities.  I think she will be alright.  She will be here by Wednesday afternoon or evening, and then she can meet you and everyone else at the party here on Friday night”.

Emilia’s P.O.V

Blaring the radio, I sing to Sia’s “Elastic Heart” as I’m driving down the highway.  It’s the end of September and it is starting to get cooler out.  Autumn has always been my favorite season.  The colors on the leaves are beautiful, the air is crisp, and the weather is perfect for a pair of jeans and hoodie.  I’m excited to start my new adventure in Los Angeles, but at the same time, I’m terrified.  I’ll be in LA, where actors, actresses, and models live and work.  I feel like yet again, I will never be able to fit in.  I’m not necessarily overweight, but I’m not skinny by any means.  Standing at five feet five inches, and wearing a size 12, I am considered below the average size now for women in America.  But I will still stand out like a sore thumb around most people there.  I have always loved dying my hair, hating the natural hair color I had.  Right now, I have red hair, with black peekaboo on the bottom.  

Shaking my head from my thoughts, I stop at a hotel in Denver to stretch my aching limbs and stay the night. If I get up early enough tomorrow, I will make it to my brothers by tomorrow in the early evening.  I will be able to start my life over, and forget about my past.

Getting up to my room, the only thing I can think about is taking a hot shower to sooth my muscles from sitting for so long.  As I take off my shirt, I look down at the raised skin on my left wrist.  Combing my fingers over the skin, it brings back memories. I started cutting myself when I was in the 8th grade.  Masking my emotions for so long took a toll on me.  I needed to find a way to think of anything, anything but my emotions. The first thing that came to mind was pain.  Being able to concentrate on the pain helped my mind ease.  My father was not an emotional person; he didn’t really care to hear about my emotional problems.  Growing up, I resented him for that.  But now, I understand where he was coming from.  It’s the way he was raised, and after my mother passed, he was a single father raising two young children.  I forgave him, and that is all that matters.  But the cutting became an addiction, one that I was never fully able to stop.  Sure, I had gone months, sometimes a year or two without doing it.  But it was always there as a release for me.  

As the hot water runs down my body, relaxing my muscles, I can’t help but think that this is all my fault. Everything is usually my fault.  I’m stubborn, who would want to put up with me. I feel as if I will be alone forever. Maybe that is not such a bad thing though.  

I don’t want to put my problems onto my brother when I get there, so I do the only thing I know will help release some of my emotions.  I grab my razor that I keep stashed away in a side pocket of my purse. As I sit at the edge of the bed, with my towel wrapped around me, I slice a few lines into my left wrist and watched as the blood bubbles up to the surface of my skin.  I sit there for a few minutes and just take in the pain, as I feel my emotions slipping farther away.  

I clean myself up, brush my hair and teeth, and jump into bed.  I set my alarm for early the next morning, and drift off to a dreamless sleep. 

Tag List: @evansfanficweekly

[taylors-journal]

Style 180

Taylor Repak

Style is unique to each and every student that walks through the halls of Rolling Meadows High School. Whether it’s jeans and a t-shirt or leggings and an oversized sweatshirt, most people have their own identifiable “look.” I, for one, usually wear a pair of skinny jeans and a t-shirt, often emblazoned with a Marvel or Harry Potter graphic. But I wondered: What would high school life be like if I dressed for a new part?

In a society that’s so vainly fixated upon outward appearance, I was apprehensive to say the least. Nonetheless, I took on the challenge and began to plan, deciding to wear dresses and heels for a combination of one gold, one purple day. The next two days, I would go for a bolder, more gothic look. Despite my aforementioned misgivings, I was determined to see the week through, and rationalized that it couldn’t be too difficult. I had faith in my peers that I would be treated the same, no matter what I looked like on the surface. Much to my dismay, I apparently had no idea what was in store for my next week.

Monday arrived, and with it, the commencement of my wardrobe challenge. I put on a dress, some light makeup and heels, dressed almost as though I were headed to a formal party, like a wedding or Easter mass. Confident, I departed for school, three inches taller. In accordance with my prediction that any reactions wouldn’t be too dramatic, the day went about as normal, with one or two more compliments than usual as the only exception, but this was expected.

Another dress and a pair of heels for Tuesday, and the day progressed as easily as the day before. At least until seventh block, when a student bluntly asked for the whole classroom to hear, “Taylor, what are you wearing? If nothing special is happening, why would you dress so nicely?” I stuttered, unsure of what to say. I hadn’t been telling anyone about my experiment, and I stumbled over my words for an answer.

To my surprise, another student quickly came to my defense, saying “What do you mean? Taylor can wear whatever she wants. It’s her choice, so if she wants to wear a dress, she can wear a dress.” I smiled, saying nothing, glad that the student had defended me with such little hesitation, and against his friend, no less.

Thinking the worst had passed, the day ended. I knew my style was changing the next day, and didn’t think it would be difficult at all, given that many students wear this style on a daily basis. Thursday morning dawned, and I slipped into black skinny jeans, combat boots and a black tank top. Pulling my hair into a high ponytail and applying black lipstick and mascara, I left for school.

Contrary to my obviously misguided preconceptions, I was immediately struck with how many odd looks and whispers I got from students in the hallway. People I had never talked to looked at me sideways, people I had known for nine years avoided me. I can’t count how many people came up to me to ask “what I was doing.” The mere idea of walking through the lunchroom filled me with anxiety, and I went without lunch. Dumbfounded and mildly afraid, I looked to my friends for a reprieve from the public scrutiny, but they only laughed and made fun.

That was only my first day. I still had to recycle this style for Thursday. I pondered just ending the experiment, thinking that I’d already gathered enough data for an article.

I told myself, no, I had made a commitment, and that I must honor it. I pulled on a very similar outfit, this time with a leather jacket, a choker necklace and I let my hair down, allowing it to cover my eyes partially. Having acquired a day’s worth of experience already, this day wasn’t as terrible in the shock factor, but the same things happened: I was stared at, approached and questioned to an inappropriate point

I realize now that I’d had no clue going into this just how deep the effects would run. Our society is built upon the idea of physical beauty, and even our own peers are hesitant to shun their own predispositions to reject those who elude the status quo. Despite how glorified it might be in movies and literature, marching to the beat of my own drum only brought me anxiety and paranoia.

As much as I hoped to believe that our generation of all groups would welcome the atypical and exceptional, the student body did not welcome me and I was frankly disappointed. We still have strides to take in acceptance of uniqueness, and I aspire to make a change in the general mindset of my community.