#why is duck so goddamn expensive in the united states

[gu6chan]

i would kill for a cup of this right now

[wxy85]

People have no sense of reality, responsibility or commitment. They will adopt cute little pigs or ducklings or puppies and when their cutsy itsy baby animal turn into a grown ass swine or duck or dog, suddenly they’re not cute enough anymore to be worth the trouble. Guess what Linda, you should have thought of that before. It’s the same goddamn thing with the fitness implants, sure it’s tempting to hack yours, amp it up to the max and live your muscle growth fantasy. But who’s gonna wipe your butt when you’re too big to bend your arms? Who’s gonna feed you with that fucking funnel to get the bare minimal 10k calories you need to survive? Who’s gonna sponge bath you? Who’s gonna take care of every one of your fucking needs because you’ll be as helpless as a fucking potted plant? I got stories like that every month, they’re nothing special. They’re sadly common stories of abandonment, broken dreams and aborted love stories. Ever since we opened the Bullpen with a few other guys, we’ve been receiving hundreds of requests to take in boyfriend, husbands or sons that were a burden on their family due to their size. But we can’t take everyone in, as much as we want to help those overgrown bulls. Their care is expensive, and we had to make the Bullpen a sustainable space. We take in up to 50 Bulls max, 30 gay bulls 20 straights there is an overlap for bisexual ones. We feed them, take care of them in a five star complex. Each bull have a dedicated caretaker that see to his every need. A happy bull is a growing bull and a growing bull is a bankable bull. The facility is filled with camera and we sell subscriptions to channel broadcasting the feed to muscle fetishists all around the world. We sell bulls from time to time too. We make sure the people adopting them are able to take a decent care of them. That allows us to have new bulls over and so on. Oh come on! Cut that fucking outraged face,i don’t need a lecture on how this is prostitution and human trade, I know what we’re doing. I don’t care what you think, we’re actually helping those big morons because no one else would. I’ll tell you the story of Rafael, how we got him here, how we rescued him from of a fucking shithole and how much better he is now with us. Rafael application was sent in by his boyfriend Chad. There was a lot of pictures documenting their story and a long long letter from Chad explaining why we wanted his beloved bull gone from his life. Let me tell you that letter wasn’t a touching text about the man he loved, it was the cry for help of an asswipe that didn’t see the writing on the walls. They met in college they were both 20 years old, Chad was your all american closeted football player and Rafael was a brilliant exchange student from Mexico. They fell in love, thoug i suspect it was only skin deep but I’ll never know for sure. Chad a square jaw blond hair blue eyes and that thick body of a football player while Rafael was a model like young man with dark almond eyes jet black hair, full lips and a very open and joyful face. I knew right away he’d be a hit in the bullpen. After a year of relationship Chad had opened to Rafael about his muscle fantasies and talked his very enthusiast boyfriend into getting his fitness implant unlocked and amped to the max. Like always it was fun at first. Within the first few month Rafael had turned into a real fitness freak. One of those adonis you see all over your IG feed. But that was merely a temporary state as Rafael was just beginning his journey toward freakdom. Six month into it, Rafael was already a big as a pro heavyweight bodybuilder, his shape was incredible, thin waist, ripped body, massive arms and ass and legs. Chad didn’t mention anything about it but from Rafael’s bulge on the pics of that period, he was also growing down there. It was probably the best period for them. Chad paraded his trophee boy all over the place. The tipping point was when Rafael dropped out of college. One of the very bad side effects of amping up an implant is that it upset the hormonal balance so much that it slowly turn people into dumb obedient and totally dependent persons. Bulls if you want. As it started to affect Rafael, he tried doing odd jobs but couldn’t keep one because of his degrading emotional state and shears size and range of motion. And yet, he was still growing. As expected, one year into the process Rafael had left the realm of humanly possible. Bigger than any roidhead, he was turning into a dumb obedient bull in need of constant attention. It was a full time care that Chad couldn’t provide. What happens in that sort of situation? What wasn’t said in Chad’s application? I had a faint idea of course. Rafael growth chart had started to curb down but he was far from done. Remember what I said : a happy bull is a growing bull. I knew Rafael wasn’t receiving proper care, I just had no idea how much of a shitshow it really was. Rafael was to be my new protege. My former one had been sold to an rich entrepreneur from the United Arab Emirates (with the utmost discretion of course). And as I perused the various applications I saw potential in Rafael and decided to be his caretaker. I took the Bullpen truck and drove all the way to their place to pick Rafael up. Due to their size, Bulls don’t do well in planes or bus. The truck has been modified for their comfort and has some material for emergencies an unplanned events. Chad and Rafael lived in a small house on the outskirts of the town. An affordable place for a low income couple. I remember pulling in their driveway an early morning of june. I was greeted by a nervous Chad, waiting for me on the porch. He was a gorgeous man but he looked like shit. Dirty sweatpants and t-shirt, messy hair and bags under the eyes. He was a wreck, it almost sparked sympathy in me but I knew Rafael was sort of the real victim here. -”Hello, Chad. I’m Leigh. We talked on the phone, I’m here to pick Rafael up” I said forcing an ultra brite smile. Chad eyed me from top to bottom, I knew the man was checking me out. I had a perfectly configured fitness implant and I dare say my body was fitness magazine cover material. I was wearing worn out jeans and a tight t-shirt that did hug my body in the most flattering way and a very expensive pair of shades, but the display wasn’t intended for him. -” Yeah, he’s inside.” he said nervous. I could feel something wasn’t quite right. Most of the bulls are waiting to be picked up more impatiently than their carers are waiting to get rid of them. I decided to probe around a little. -”Is his stuff ready?” I asked. -”He doesn’t really have stuff to pack. He doesn’t fit into anything anymore.” He said growing more nervous. “...And he doesn’t know yet.” I felt my face crack on the spot. Chad froze, probably afraid I’d just cancel the pick up. -”You didn’t tell him? That's irresponsible” I snapped. -”It’s not easy ok?!” Chad said eyes watering. I took my sunglasses off and stared right into his eyes until he squirmed on the spot. -”Spare me that bullshit.” I said flatout. “Let’s get going.” I said pointing at the door. When we entered, the first thing that I took in was the smell. It was terrible. And the second thing was the mess. It was equally terrible. We entered the living room, there was several dirty mattress piled on the floor. It was a makeshift bed for Rafael. he was still sleeping. I felt my heart tighten, he was dirty, unkempt. I wanted to punch Chad for doing that to his boyfriend. I had never seen a bull left in such a terrible state. Chad walked to Rafael and shook his shoulder softly. It felt unnatural. -”Rafael, wake up.” he breathed “wake up.” Rafael stirred. He was incredibly large compared to his boyfriend I’d say around 6’6 and over 400lbs with a body fat in the singledigits. Yet that seemed smaller than what I expected. It dawned on my that he might be underfed. Rafael slowly woke up, asking Chad for a hug. Chad looked dead inside, he went along but I could tell he wanted nothing to do with Rafael. and then Rafael spotted me. -”Who’s that?” he said. I remained silent, letting Chad take responsibility. -”It’s Leigh, he’s here for you. He’s gonna take you to the Bullpen.” To those guys the Bullpen is a fucking Disneyland on roids. Getting accepted in is generally the best day of their lives. So I did not expect the reaction that followed. -”YOU’RE ABANDONING ME?!” Rafael cried. The whole fucking house shook. Chad almost pissed himself of fear. I stayed stolid, straight in my designer leather boots. Two things about bulls: first they’re submissive stay cool and they’ll obey. Second, they’re practically harmless overgrown teddy bears. So I while Chad was expecting him to go on a roid rage like rampage I knew Rafael would most likely just start wailing and sobbing. -”You can’t leave me! You said you’d take care of me. That you wanted it.” Rafael said. Chad couldn’t even look him in the eyes. -”Babe, you said you loved me. That we were in it together. You can’t give me up.” Rafael said between heavy sobs. Chad remained silent as Rafael was stuck on repeat. His hair was long and unkept. His tears flowing on his cheeks, leaving trails in the dirt. That was the last straw. I laid my hand on Chad’s shoulder and shoved him toward the door. -”Get out of here. Wait outside. You’re useless.” I said I turned to Rafael who was looking at me for the first time really. -”I wanna stay with Chad.” Rafael said still sobbing. I looked for a clean spot to sit but couldn’t find any so I stayed up. -”When was the last time you two had sex? or even some sort intimacy?” I asked. “When was the last time he took care of you? When did he cleaned you last time?” -”I don’t fit in the shower anymore…” -”There is a hose outside, he could wash you. He could clean the dump he makes you live in. Does he even feed you correctly?” Pregnant pause. -”Look, I can’t force you to come with me. But I’m pretty sure you’re not happy here… Can I at least give you a haircut and a shower. We’ll talk afterward. Rafael nodded. -”Good.” I breathed. “I’ll be right back.” I walked out to the truck. It had basic clothes and an first aid kit. I put some clean clothes, soap, shampoo, sponge and an oversized towel in a bucket and walked back to the house. Chad was out by the door, smoking and staring at me. I shot him a nasty look. -”don’t move from here till I’m done.” I said. Back in the living room Rafael was up. Trying to cover his nudity with hands but he was so wide, thick, muscular and hung he had troubles being decent. I smiled to him and gestured for him to move toward the backyard. I made him stay on the concrete terrace -”Sorry it’s gonna be cold.” I said I then splashed the big man with water, He shivered as the cold water hit his massive body. I drenched him and then cut the water I grabbed some soap and the sponge and started washing him. I love washing bulls. I love rubbing their massive muscles. I started with his back, Rafael was really a gorgeous one, sinewy and massive. He had a tapered waist that highlighted his insane V shaped torso and his huge round ass and legs. His proportions were insanely erotic. I was boning in my jeans as I felt his thick muscle, rubbing suds in worshiping manner. He was breathing slowly, definitely enjoying some much need attention. I moved to the front. He was even more impressive upfront, he had proper bull neck and massive traps. His pecs were gorgeous full slabs of muscle adorned with large large brown nipples. His abs were hard, defined and bulged in an obscene manner. Between his legs was a fat uncut cock, probably a 10 incher, all chubbed up by all the attention he was getting. I rolled off his foreskin to clean him thoroughly his dick hardened in my expert hands. I teased him just enough to get him almost fully hard and flustered but not enough to send him over the edge. With the grime gone, his skin had a warm light brown tone that highlighted his incredible physique. I noticed a few stretch marks on his shoulders and ass. Bulls grow so fast they need a good skin moisturizer or stretch marks happen. I had some nourishing oil to fade them, I made note to use it afterward. I noticed a few dark traces on his pecs that hadn't disappear. I got a closer look and my heart sank as I noticed those were bruises. -”How did you get those?” I asked afraid of the answer. -”It’s nothing.” He said deflectively. -”they’re not noting. They’re bruises, the are blueish so they’re a few days old already and they’re on a weird place.” -”It’s my fault… i didn’t even notice them.” -”how so?” -”I can’t stop my growth. Chad said I needed to but I can’t stop it. I couldn’t obey him… and…” Rafael stopped breaking down in tears again. I hugged him, getting my clothes drenched in the process. We stayed a few minutes, I hold him tight, rocking him softly until his sobbing stopped. -”I’ll come with you.” he said softly. -”That’s a relief... I wouldn’t have left you here anyway.” I said. “I’ll take of you and I’ll make sure you’re happy. You can count on me. Let’s get this over and tear out of here. Sit.” He obeyed and i proceed to wash his hair and then buzz it in a short neat fashion. His gorgeous face was finally in full view. He was looking tired but he still was that drop dead gorgeous young man from his college picture. I rinsed him one last time with the hose. I oiled his marks, put some ointment on his bruises and then helped put on shorts short and a string tank top made of soft light brushed cotton. I got him a pair of flip flop for his massive feet. His fat dick was leaving a major dick print in his grey shorts and his tank was hugging his massive frame. He was even more handsome than i expected. I put all the stuff back in the bucket and we went around the house to get to the truck. I stashed the bucket in the truck and got my tablet out. I prompted the contract on it and hold it out to Rafael. -”I need your signature on that contract. The bullpen will be your legal guardian. We’ll see to your every need and well being. In exchange we’ll monetize captions of your daily life in the bullpen.” I said. Rafael looked at me and then at Chad still on the porch of the house where he had been chain smoking out of stress and/or guilt. Rafael’s last glance was heartbreaking but brief. He pressed his thumb on the tablet to sign. Without a second glance he climbed in the truck. I looked at Chad, and decided to ignore him. I’m pretty sure sure I wouldn’t have been able to control myself and would have punched him in the throat. Instead I climbed in the truck and drove away from here. The trip’s only event was our stop midway. we stopped for food and coffee at a dinner in the middle of nowhere. Rafael was like a kid on Christmas when I told him to order everything he wanted. The waitress was shook by the amount of food he ordered and all the patrons were staring at the massive man taking up almost two seats of our booth while he shovelled crazy amounts of food in his mouth. He looked so happy, it was contagious. I can’t save every bull in the world but I try. One bull at a time. He was totally oblivious to the nasty stares he was getting and so was I. I delighted in watched him dig in his food and as I ate mine I booted my tablet to get some stuff done. -”What are you doing?” he asked between two mouthful. -”Don’t talk with a full mouth. I’m just taking care of some… paperwork… regarding Chad.” I heard him gulp and from the sudden silence coming from his side of the table, I noticed he had stopped eating. I raised my head to look at him look at me with a concerned face. -What?” I asked -”You’reporting him?” I breathed deeply. -”Yes. For domestic abuse and endangering the life of others.“ Rafael laid a thick hand on mine. -”Please don’t.” He said. “He’s had enough trouble.” I shot a hard look to Rafael. making it clear i disapproved his decision. Relationship with Bulls is not just bossing them around and stuffing them. There needs to be trust and respect between a caretaker and his bull. So I deleted the report i was about to send. -”Fine.” I said. “I don’t approve of it but I guess it is your decision to make.” -”Thanks.” he said with relief. Once we were done with lunch I paid the astronomical tab and we were back on the road. It was 10pm when we reached the Bullpen. We were both exhausted. I took Rafael straight to his room. It was a vast room with hardwood floor, white walls and ceiling, a massive bed with white sheets and a little furniture in clear would with discreet steel reinforcements. It had windows that took all of the far wall of the room and showed the forest encircling the bullpen. I gave him a tour of the room before closing the blinds. -”I’ll let you rest for tonight. I’ll give you a tour of the facility tomorrow morning.” I said. -”Leigh?” -”Yes?” -”I don’t wanna sleep alone.” -”Of course.” I said. “I’ll just grab a shower and go to sleep with you. -”I could use a shower too.” he said shyly I smiled and gestured him to the bathroom. I went to the dressing and retrieved two pair of soft loose boxers for us after the shower and went to bathroom where Rafael was struggling to get undressed. The bathroom was a large room in polished concrete with a large wooden reinforced stool that doubled as a stepladder and a storage for shower supplies. It was designed for bulls to sit on and for caretaker to climb on to clean their bull. Their was sprinklers heads on the ceiling to ensure an efficient use of water. I watched Rafael try to take off his tanktop before, it was a turn on watching big guys struggle and that would definitely please the watchers of our channels. They loved seeing big guys struggle with mundane tasks. Rafael ended up looking at me with a pleading look. -”Sit.” I said. He obeyed. I climbed on the stool and grabbed the bottom of his tanktop and lifted it off his massive frame. -”Stand up.” I grabbed the waist of his shorts and yanked them down. He gasped as his big dick flopped in the open. I went to a laundry box by the entrance of the bathroom and dumped the clothes in them. It then turned my back Rafael and undressed. I felt him watch me. I wanted him to watch me. Bulls have a crazy sex drive they need sex several times a day to be happy. And that bull hadn’t had sex in a while. It was my duty to make him happy… plus Rafael had got me sort of horny. I turned around as if i wasn’t naked, exposing my perfectly shaped body and decent cock, walked to the tap and unleashed a a warm rain in the room. Rafael was on the stool in the middle, he was beaming… I wondered when was the last time he had felt hot water on his skin. I washed both of us, he sat obediently on the stool while I took care of us. I wasn’t just cleaning him i was massaging his huge muscles, caressing his huge frame, exploring part of his body that hadn't been touch in a while. His pits, his crack, under his pecs or under his lemon sized balls. He was hard as a rock. I grabbed his fat dick and stroked it pretending to clean it. He was looking at me, waiting for me to make a move. I leaned against him and kissed his soft lips. He moaned in delight. We made out for a few minutes. We then sat next to each other and started masturbating each other. His temperature was rising, we would exchange kiss and caress as we pleasured each other. -”Get on your back. I know what my bull needs.” I said Rafael laid on his back on the stool, licking his lips in anticipation. He raised his legs in the air exposing his hole. I grabbed the lube in the shower supplies and used a generous amount on both my dick and his hole. I started teasing his hole with my cockhead. He was breathing hard, looking at me with lust, he begged me to fuck him. I went in slowly and gently. He was tight and hot around my dick. I’d go back and forth with the tip to loosen him. Sliding myself further in everytime. Until I had all my seven inches buried in him. He was slowly loosening around me and soon I was pounding him good. It felt amazing having his massive legs around my body as I pounded his huge ass. I grabbed his dick and wanked him as I fucked his brain out. The moment he came I allowed myself to pound him harder and fill him with seed. His whole body relaxed, shook by occasional spasm of the afterglow. After a little rest, I cleaned both of us again. After helping my bull in a sitting position I turned off the water, towelled us and helped him put on his boxer before going to bed. Rafael was just at the beginning of his conditioning as a bull and he was already doing so good. He’d be one of the best we had ever had here. I knew it. We laid on the massive bed and hugged each other to sleep. -”Leigh?” -”Yes.” I said half asleep. -”thanks.” -”My pleasure.” I chuckled. I heard him from afar as I was falling asleep. -”Please… tell me you won’t leave me.” -”I won’t. You’re mine now...” I said before blacking out.

[nothingpersonal1234]

mister congeniality (bellarke)

as you can likely guess, this is a miss congeniality AU

read here or on AO3

The worst part of the whole thing is that if he takes a step back, he understands exactly why he was chosen to play this role. It makes perfect tactical sense. He’s the only one in the agency who is 1) young enough to pass as college-aged, 2) good at undercover work, and 3) male.

So really, if he were anyone else but himself, he’d totally get why he was chosen to go undercover at America’s first and only male beauty pageant. 

But he is himself. And currently, he’s getting the ever-loving shit plucked out of his eyebrows while Clarke fucking Griffin eats a bagel and smirks at him.

So really, his complaints are one hundred percent justified.

“Jesus Christ, can someone get me a fucking donut, at least? There’s two whole trays of them right there!” He catches sight of a woman approaching with a bottle of Nair; he stops her cold with a look. “What the fuck do you think you’re going to do with that?”

Clarke pushes herself off the table she’d been leaning against and approaches the rigged dentist’s chair he’s currently sprawled out on. “Can you please,” she says patiently, “stop terrorizing the beauticians? They’re just doing their jobs.”

“Yeah, and I want to get back to doing mine,” he says, batting away the goddamn tweezers as they approach his face again. “I’m an FBI agent! I didn’t go to fucking Quantico for this!”

“Yeah, and I didn’t go to get stuck babysitting you,” she replies through a bite of bagel. “Yet here we are. Hold still, or I’m going to knock you out.”

He glares at her for half a second longer before groaning and letting his head fall back. The woman with the tweezers hesitantly starts going at it again at Clarke’s nod. “I don’t understand why the fuck I have to do this,” Bellamy says, for possibly the tenth time in the past two hours.

“Because,” Clarke responds, bored, “some Christian fundamentalist group is convinced this pageant promotes homosexuality and threatened to bomb it, and you’re a highly qualified agent dedicated to protecting the people of the United States of America.”

“Yeah, I got that part,” he says, gritting his teeth as the tweezers rip another hair out of his face. “But why do I have to be the one to do this?”

She sighs. “You just want to hear me say that you’re the best undercover op we have in our class again, don’t you?”

"It wouldn’t hurt,” he grumbles, and pretends he can’t hear her snickering.

So maybe it’s the coffee, or the sleep deprivation, or something in the air, but Clarke legitimately cannot take her eyes off Bellamy Blake as he strides out toward her in the morning sunlight. 

Behind her, Raven whistles. “Boy cleans up good,” she says, before sliding into the driver’s seat of their SUV and starting the engine.

Bellamy stops a few feet in front of Clarke and slides his sunglasses off to meet her gaze. “Well?” he asks, going for nonchalant and missing it by a few notes. “Is my movie makeover adequate?”

“Uh,” she starts, then stops. 

A smirk grows on his face. “Alright, I think that’s the answer I needed.”

The cockiness is what snaps her out of it. “Don’t be such an ass,” she replies, before reaching up to run her fingers through his hair. He ducks down automatically, although the expression on his face goes from smug to stunned pretty quickly. “The gel isn’t a good look on you,” she says in response to his unasked question. “Messy is much better.”

He clears his throat. “I, uh... do I need to look that great right now? We’re just going to the hotel.”

“Yeah, you’ll be meeting all the other competitors. And I think they have a full schedule planned out for you, actually. Dress rehearsals and publicity stunts, probably.”

“Hence the monkey suit,” he supplies. 

“The expensive, fitted, designer monkey suit,” she says, finishing up with his hair. He rolls his eyes as he straightens up.

The SUV window rolls down then. “Hey, lovebirds,” Raven calls. “If you could stop with the PDA and get into the damn car, maybe we’ll have time to hit a Starbucks before we drop Bellamy off at hell.”

“Snarky when she gets no sleep, huh?” Bellamy says, finally hitting that casual tone before sliding into the car. 

Clarke hopes no one can see her face turning red.

“There’s a what?” 

“A swimsuit portion,” says the backstage crew member, unruffled. “Come on, you have to have known that. That’s the most infamous part.”

Bellamy looks like he’s about to pass out. The music on stage is starting though, and half the contestants have already gotten changed. Clarke grabs the - well, it’d be generous to call it a swimsuit, it’s like a scrap of black fabric - from the guy’s hands and shoves it at Bellamy, forcing herself to be professional despite Raven’s cackling in their earpieces.

“Bell, do it for America,” she says, and God help her if her voice doesn’t crack.

“Fucking - “ He snatches it from her and stomps away toward the changing rooms.

“He’s just mad because he knows we’re going to make fun of him for literally forever,” says Raven. “Right, Miller?”

“I’ve already got alerts set on every social media website for his name,” Miller deadpans, and Clarke really can’t tell if he’s being serious or not.

Of course, that’s when Bellamy comes storming back out toward her, and literally all human thought leaves her brain.

“Do not,” he intones. “I am not in the mood.”

She nods, a little busy trying not to choke on her own tongue.

Raven, however, is in charge of monitoring the feed from the camera disguised as an American flag pin on Clarke’s suit, and it’s very clear when she turns back toward that particular computer screen. “Holy shit, Blake!”

“Can we not do this right now,” he replies, a dull red flush working its way up his neck. His hand goes up to tug at his hair. Clarke watches his shoulder muscles shift and clears her throat. 

You’re a federal agent, she scolds herself, not a fucking teenager. Get a grip. 

She can’t figure out where she should be looking. Should she be making eye contact? Staring over his shoulder? Checking out his abs?

Jesus, okay, definitely should not be looking at his ass.

“Are we all done ogling Blake?” comes Miller’s voice through their earpieces. 

“Nope,” Raven replies, gleeful.

Clarke clears her throat one more time for good measure. “Uh, I think you’re on,” she says to Bellamy, gesturing at the other contestants, who are all lining up to get back on stage.

“I can’t believe,” he says, “that I’m going to be on national television in nothing but Speedos. I don’t even wear Speedos normally!”

“You’re going to be on YouTube forever,” says Miller.

“Great,” he says, and on that note, the pageant music starts up again.

Alright, so he manages to find the bomb. If his methods of making sure it safely detonated away from anyone else were a little... unorthodox... he’s sure HQ can forgive him. Better that some props backstage were blown up than the new Mr. USA’s head. 

Clarke is waiting for him when he gets off stage, shock blanket and bottle of water somehow already in hand. She has that look on her face that she gets whenever Jasper burns himself pouring hot coffee while texting: sympathetic, a little worried, but also amused, despite herself.

“What a hero,” she says, voice not quite sarcastic as she drapes the bright orange blanket around his shoulders.

“Yeah, yeah,” he replies, relieving her of the water and taking a long sip.

“How do you feel?” she asks, and it takes him a little while to respond.

“Better,” he decides, and laughs at her expression. “Not, like... I mean that now that we know there was a legitimate threat, and now that we’ve prevented it, I feel like this whole ordeal was worth it.”

“Yeah, it would’ve been a shame to wear a Speedo for no reason at all,” she says, and despite her teasing grin, he can see pink starting to creep into her cheeks.

“Not no reason,” he says, before he can help himself, and at her inquiring look, he continues, “Made you look, didn’t I?”

Raven beeps in to tell them that HQ wants to talk to him ASAP, so she doesn’t get to respond. Still, her deepening blush is all the reply Bellamy thinks he needs.

He’s greeted with a round of applause and wolf-whistles when he gets back to the office a week later. He bows once, flips off Miller (the source of most of the whistles), and settles into his seat. When he turns on his computer monitor, he finds that someone’s changed his desktop background to a picture of him assaulting the new Mr. USA to grab the explosive crown on his head. Before he can do much more than process it, a mug of coffee enters his field of vision.

“Thought you’d like a third party view of how the action went down,” Clarke says, and he takes the mug from her with a grin.

“It is pretty cool. Still, not worth the fact that I can’t do undercover ops for a while.”

“Kane says he’s thinking about giving you some overseas work,” she replies, taking a sip from her own mug. “You’d have to go with a partner though, and probably change up your look. People in Kazakhstan might not normally know who Mr. USA is, but they’ll definitely know on sight the crazy guy who attacked Mr. USA to grab his crown before it blew up.”

“Wow, I’ve become the face of America in Eastern Europe. That’s a shit deal.”

“The trials and tribulations of serving your country,” she shoots back, and he can feel everything settling back to normal, as normal as things get in this crazy office, and while that’s exactly what he wanted while he was undercover, he’s also come to realize that there are some stones you can’t leave unturned.

“Clarke,” he says, and the nerves he didn’t feel at all during the last few weeks suddenly kick in when she meets his gaze. “Listen, I... I know we fuck around a lot, and I haven’t exactly been the greatest guy to hang out with, especially at the beginning, especially at Quantico. But... you’ve been the best partner I could’ve asked for, even before this fucking ridiculous mission, and... I want to say thank you. For always having my back. And for everything you did for me these past few weeks.”

She’s looking at him with her interrogation face now, blank and a little calculating, like she’s trying to figure out how what he’s saying fits with the story she already knows. “Okay,” she says slowly, and it’s only when Raven chimes in that he realizes half the office is already listening in.

“Jesus, just kiss already,” she yells. Clarke’s expression immediately breaks into laughter, and that’s what does it for him. He can’t help ducking forward to press a kiss against her lips, quick and soft, and then her arms are twining around his neck to pull him in again, hardly able to kiss properly around the smiles both of them aren’t even trying very hard to hide.

“Fucking finally,” Raven says when they break apart, and Bellamy flips her off. 

“Kane is definitely never going to let us partner up again,” Clarke says, nearly breathless, and Bellamy laughs.

“We’ll figure something out,” he says. “We always do.”