#why does hanbin look so sad | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

loserlvrss · 9 months ago

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꒰ 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐌𝐄 𝐓𝐎 ꒱ 성한빈

summary : your boyfriend was perfect, everyone could agree on it... so why were you trying so hard to love him how he wanted you to?

genre : angst, hanbin x afab!reader tws : language, angst author notes : y'all know i love my sad stories don’t play word count : 1.4k

you felt a tear escape your eye, rolling over your nose bridge and splotching against the white pillow case. you fought with sniffling, afraid you'd make the man pressed against your back stir.

you tried to make your pulse race, heart swell, anything that said you loved him more than anything. but, whenever you looked at him you saw someone that shouldn't be yours anymore; it just broke your heart instead.

you stayed up at night imagining all the ways he should make you feel. and it had nothing to do with under achieving because he was the epitome of perfection — really — everyone could contest to your boyfriend being the man of their dreams.

so, why couldn't he be the man of yours?

you were supposed to be the lucky one because he could picture himself marrying you someday. he's said he was prepared to settle down with you, start a family, and be yours forever. he wanted the picquet fences, two and a half kids, to live the dream people strive their whole lives to achieve. you had every door opened for you. with his hand in yours you should feel on top of the world. but, you didn't, and it made you feel as if you were stuck leading him on, trying too hard to love him like he wanted you to.

just like you know you have the privilege to.

but it wasn't enough. however, you didn't know what was either then.

loves supposed to be a two-way-street, a 50/50 between give and take. of course, you knew it would come with sacrifices, nonetheless, wasn't your peace of mind too high a price to pay?

it’s been said that the moment secrets start to pile up — the moment you start to feel on edge around the single person you're supposed to come to for anything — the relationship isn't meant to go on.

you gripped his arm tighter, trying to get warm while being swirled by such cold ghosts. they knew all the secrets you kept at bay during the day. however, once the sun went down, they taunt you as if it's the only thing they were conjured to do.

you couldn't figure out if being alone was worse than feeling alone with him at your side. were you prepared to suck it up; to fake it until you make it? would it, in the end, be like the movies and you have this big epiphany, finally realizing that you did love him?

because you thought you did.

but if this was what love is supposed to feel like, then you couldn't understand why people search their whole lives for a mediocre feeling that just weighs heavy within your gut.

it was seemingly closer to guilt.

this house you two had built together was haunted, and it was getting harder and harder to not look over your shoulder like you've actually done something wrong.

maybe you liked the hurt. maybe you liked knowing that you were yearned for as deeply as he does for you... or maybe that was all the lies it took to make you stay.

you always cursed yourself for being too easy, knowing you deserved better from yourself. more.

would he cry if you pushed your way from his arms, using shallow breaths to try and explain yourself? would he cry if he knew you were leaving?

would you?

you were walking a thin line between this and whatever you wanted it to be. you knew it would be easy to stay, but don't you deserve to feel like you're on cloud nine whenever you see him? if you googled the definition of love and happiness, your picture-perfect relationship wouldn't even be within the search results.

it was gut-wrenching. physically nauseating. there was no way you could face him, looking in his eyes as you said you loved him too, while knowing your palms didn't sweat with anticipation. you’d kiss his lips and think that he was just another man, and that made you ill. you wanted so desperately to be in love with him, that you've caused yourself to hurdle to the bathroom just to lie and say that you ate something bad earlier in the day.

was there something wrong with you? you always thought that there must have been. you had it good — so, so easy — he's what everybody wants, a true gentleman, the definition of husband material: he was good with kids, he respected you, he's confident and always spoke kindly. so, why was it, in reality, so hard?

you found yourself recalling memories that felt good in the moment, but you always had a lingering thought — a rash that burned your skin — that something was off.

“bin, do you love me?”

“more than anything.”

it echoed in your head, swirling your thoughts like a wild tornado, and bouncing off every surface.

“do you love me?”

no. yes. maybe? it was as simple as a couple words, but more complicated than you could have ever imagined. no, you loved the idea of him. yes, he was perfect. and, maybe.

you keep thinking you could. you want to. you’ve willed yourself to. but, did you?

“yes, more than anything.”

did the lies get better the more times they’re worn?

maybe.

you thought it’d be easier if he didn’t. you thought it’d be easier to let go if he only liked you a lot. maybe even less than a lot — a moderate amount?

you found it hard to look at yourself because you played the role so well that you didn’t even know who you were anymore. the perfect girlfriend. the loving wife. the trophy at his side. the flash of the camera that never catches the movie. but, it was sickening seeing someone else’s face staring back at you every time you’d pass a reflective surface.

but if you kept trying to force yourself into the house that never felt like a home, you felt like you’d eventually go crazy — actually, absolutely batshit insane as the plaster whispered to you; words that sounded sweet but never tasted like it.

if there was any reason to get out, it was doubt. and, that’s all you feel when you touch him. as sad as it is, all good things must come to a bittersweet end. were you prepared to let the curtain fall and the ending credits roll? you feared not, but you feared a lot of things.

you didn’t want him to beg you, honestly you didn’t even want him to wake up and see you leaving. maybe you could will the wind to pick up, masking your sounds. you didn’t want him to look down at you with such adoration that it made you rethink the decision that you have never stopped thinking about.

you’ve rarely ever lost the ability of sight — to critically think — but when faced with the pros and the cons of toughing out the relationship, you just felt lost.

you could on and on being ignorant, but what’s love if there’s nothing left to fight for? you didn’t know. and maybe that’s what pained you the most; you didn’t know.

would it be right, or would it be wrong? only time would tell. your decision would tell.

it did tell.

you’d left a letter on the cool countertop, splotched with tears and ink stains. the ballpoint pen still laid next to it as you stared at your signature, your heart. it was romantic, but in reality stupid to romanticize something so cruel. maybe you did love him, and that’s why you had to let him go.

was it undignified to write your words instead of telling him face to face? or did it take strength to do something you never thought you could?

he deserved someone who was prepared to take on everything he could ever want — knowing you couldn’t give that to him washed you with guilt — you knew that anything and everything within the world should be his. you also knew somewhere deep down that it would hurt, maybe he’d even cry for you, but soon he’d see that you weren’t anything special. you were just another girl who would eventually become a footnote in a chapter he’d come to forget about.

he deserved better than artificial i love yous, better than superficial feelings and uncertain heartbeats. he deserved better than cold skin, and pale features. he deserved nonverbal affection and reassurance. he deserved actions and devotion. he deserved a lot, but one thing he never deserved was you.

and you never deserved to receive all of that from him for nothing in return. however, you knew he wouldn’t take it back even if he had the chance to. he loved you like bees love flowers, like the sun loves the moon, like the body needs air, and it made your stomach turn.

you’d found someone so easy to fall in love with, but that’s exactly what you couldn’t do.

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haesunflower · 2 years ago

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zb1 accidentally breaks something you gave them .....₊˚⊹♡

genre: fluff/comedy (it's funny imo)

pairing: reader (gn) x zerobaseone

about/tags: they accidentally break something you made/gifted

inspired by this quick ask prompt, yujin not here but he's in the quick ask, it's mostly cute don't worry, there's no angst

hides it for as long as possible : gyuvin & ricky

when gyuvin accidentally dropped the little ceramic mug you made together during pottery class he literally gasps out loud. he picks up the pieces quietly and stores it in a container so he could figure out how to piece it back together. when you ask him about where it went he sorta goes like "aha about that..." while scratching the back of his head.

meanwhile ricky got lucky with this one because he knows exactly where to buy the watch you gave him. when he gets to the store, he feels terrible when he sees the price tag – now fully knowing how much you paid for this. so instead of buying a replacement watch, he has it repaired (even though it comes out more expensive that way) just so that he can say that this is still the same watch you got him for his birthday. you never find out it was broken at some point.

tries to fix it himself: hanbin & taerae

after working on it for several hours, hanbin is still busy gluing all the major pieces of the vase you bought him when you suddenly arrive home. "y/n...you're here early ha ha" he laughs aloof and plasters a huge nervous smile on his face, hoping you're not too mad about it. you can't be mad at him because he's trying his best to fix it :(

meanwhile taerae is the complete opposite in terms of disposition and is 100% panicking about trying to fix the snowglobe you got him. rather than actually fixing it, he's staring at all the pieces wondering and contemplating where he went wrong. you find him on the floor next to all the pieces and materials he needs to put it back together. he looks up at you with big doe eyes and says "sweetie i can explain..." as if it's the worst thing you caught him doing. you giggle a little and help him put it back together.

comes clean and apologizes: gunwook & hao

he thinks honesty is the best policy, so when gunwook comes softly knocking at your door with the broken cd in hand you're a little dumbfounded. like, how do you break a cd mixtape in half?? he explains that he had to wrestle gyuvin's dog because he had it in his mouth. but he says that so deadpan you can't help but laugh at his face. gunwook is still looking at you like 😕 "no y/n this is serious and i'm sorry i wasn't taking care of it"

like gunwook, hao tells you right away because he doesn't want you to feel some typa way about it. he shows you the worn out shoes (rather, only the one for the right foot) you got him on your first year of dating, and how he must have lost or forgot to pack the left shoe while he was preparing to go back from Japan. you examine the shoe and you ask him why he still keeps it when the soles are practically falling off already. he says he keeps it as a goodluck charm and he's pretty sad he lost the other pair. you kiss him on the cheek because he's so cute about it :(

you're at the scene of the crime when it happens: matthew & jiwoong

you're chasing each other around the house for the remote when matthew accidentally knocks over the framed collage you made for him on your anniversary. you both look at each other like 😳 for a few seconds before he finally picks it up to examine it. "luckily, it's just the frame that broke y/n. very fixable" and while he's distracted you steal the remote from his pocket lololol

on the flip side, jiwoong's tactic is ~ distraction ~ when you hear a loud clash come from the garage. the motorcycle you gifted to him for your wedding fell to one side, causing one of the mirrors to break. but when you check up on him in the garage he's all like "hey baby what are you doing here?" whilst chucking the broken side mirror under the car so you don't see it. he's walking over to you quickly so you don't see the mess behind him, and says stuff like "new shirt baby? it looks great. let's go inside now" as he directs you to go back inside.

૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა

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taeraeszn · 2 years ago

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i know requests are closed so no rush of course. just leaving this here so i won’t forget the idea. but could you do zb1 reacting to you getting stood up on a date and what they do?

how does zb1 react to you getting stood up on a date?

hi anon!! i'm sorry this request took so long to get to but here it is! also i'm assuming that they weren't the ones who stood you up since i got another request with them standing you up lol. i decided to alter some of them or else they would've been a bit repetitve :)

also can i just mention how excited i am for their concept teasers??? i'm so thrilled!!! i love our boys so much and i can't wait for their debut <3

warnings: mentions of break up, just all in all mostly sad but happy endings :) lmk if there is any more you would like me to add

kim jiwoong

you had matched with someone on tinder a few days ago and were already planning on meeting up with them

but jiwoong felt that something was fishy about this, he didn't trust this person you were always telling him about

but it was also because he was really jealous about your relationship with them.

deep down he wanted the same thing with you but you two had a close friend relationship for years and he didn't want to ruin that

so comes the day where you have to meet up with this person and they don't even end up coming to the restaurant. you were left there sitting by yourself, the waiters giving you looks as well as the visitors.

you got up to leave and just then a massive rainfall came pouring down.

"great..." you muttered. you pulled out your phone to call jiwoong and ask him for a ride, but he was puzzled as you walked out alone rather than with your date

"where's your date?" he asked as you sat in the shotgun seat

"never showed up." his eyes widened, ready to already confront the person

"WHAT? why?" you shrugged, "I'm not sure. I sat there waiting for hours and they never messaged or call to tell me."

he sighed then started his car, "let's go somewhere."

"huh?" he softly grabbed your hand and started driving with his other hand

"you and me. let's go on a date instead. you deserve so much better than what that idiot did."

rest of the members are under the cut!

zhang hao

while at your university campus, a person you've never met before approached you and asked if you wanted to go out somewhere

you were conflicted with what to say but decided why not? you agreed and set up a time and place for your date

when you first got there, your heart was pounding and you were constantly messaging hao about what was happening. but weirdly, the person never showed up. in fact, when you tried to call them, you noticed that they had actually blocked your number

with your last message to hao, you told him that you got stood up and headed out to the bus station. hao said it was totally fine for you to come over to his place for some comfort and you couldn't have asked for anything else

when you knock on the door, he's already there and takes you to his living room

"thank you hao..." you mumble, he rubs your shoulder

"it's nothing. that loser doesn't know how good they had it, finding someone as great as you."

your cheeks heated up as you smiled at his comment

"you compliment me too much." you replied, his expression suddenly changed and he held your hand

"because you are great. in fact...i was crushing on you too for a while. i wanted you to feel the same way but you found someone else." your eyes widened

"really hao?" he nodded, "really." he repeated. you then shifted to be closer to him and rest your head on his shoulder, wrapping your arm around him too

"then do you want to try, with us this time?" you asked. he smiled and kissed your forehead gently, "of course."

sung hanbin

getting ready and making yourself look presentable went to waste after you were left stranded by your so called date

they were a senior in your university who you had been talking with during a few classes, but they and hanbin never really got along with each other

you were the one who introduced them to each other but hanbin had a bad feeling from the start

and his gust instinct was correct after you were stood up by your date, when he got your call, he already knew what had happened and quickly drove to pick you up (i'm imagining hanbin driving with one hand and squealing rn)

you two ended up heading to a park for a fresh breath of air with popsicles in your hands, hanbin wanted to make your day better

"i don't get it, we've been talking for a while and suddenly i got stood up? i've always wanted to experience love and yet this happens..."

that's when hanbin stopped eating his popsicle and turned to face you

"you can experience love, i've always been here with you, constantly in awe at how much of an amazing person you are. and if they can't see that and instead leave you stranded, then i can be the person who can help you experience love."

you looked up at hanbin, mouth in a small "O" shape as you took in what he said

"h-hanbin are you being serious?" you asked, he nodded

"i am. believe me."

seok matthew

matthew walked in with kimchi fried rice on a plate with some other food as side dishes. he was the first person to know of what happened and immediately came over to your house

he sat down next to you and gently rubbed your shoulder

"(name), i'm sorry for what happened."

"but you didn't even do anything matthew." you responded, he shrugged

"still! getting stood up is like one of the worst things ever. also seeing how they posted on their story as if nothing had happened irritates me even more." you chuckled at how cute matthew looked when his brows were furrowed

"it's okay matt. it's just nice to have you next to me now."

he turned on the tv to access netflix and choose a drama for you to watch

"want to take your mind off? we could rewatch business proposal!" your eyes lit up as you eagerly nodded

"yes! yes! turn it on!" he did as you said and it went straight to episode 3, where you two were last time you decided to rewatch it

in the midst of the silence, you shifted closer to matthew and rested your head on his chest, feeling the warmth. you were always thankful for matthew and his ability to make you feel better

"thank you matt, i know i can always count on you."

kim taerae

you had been with your partner for a while and today was your anniversary with them, you planned out the place and pretty much everything for your special day

but unfortunately, you got stood up by your partner. to make matters even worse you then went over to their place only to see them kissing someone that wasn't you

worst part was that they didn't even deny it and just straight up told you that they wanted to break up

needless to say you felt hurt, as you walked back home, you got a call from your close friend taerae and picked it up

"hey! how was your anniversary date?" he asked excitedly. you felt like crying and he could tell you sounded a bit shaky on the phone

"a-are you okay?" you took a deep breath before responding, "i just need some comfort."

"come over right now." he said before ending the call. you then walked to taerae's place and he didn't question you once and guided you to the living room

"i could tell that something happened." taerae began, "did they do something to you?"

and just like that you broke down completely, crying in taerae's arms about what had just happened

"that idiot! how could they..." you were basically raining on taerae's shirt with your tears that continuously flowed down

"i'm just so upset." you said, without hesitation, taerae left a kiss on your forehead then hugged you tightly

"don't worry your safe here. nobody can hurt you here." there, you realized that taerae was the person who was meant for you all along

you wrapped your arms around him, "thank you tae. i don't deserve you."

shen ricky

you were looking to start your new year with a blind date, hoping that the person you meet with will be someone who cherishes and loves you

however, that quickly went out of the picture when your blind date didn't bother to show up, only leaving you a text saying that they suddenly had "plans" at the exact same time and date as your blind date

it was obviously an excuse not to come but you felt hurt as you put a lot of effort to make yourself look presentable

ricky was the first person you reached out to following the "date" and he said to come over to the dorms as the members had just ordered dinner

when you arrived, the members greeted you as they knew you were close friends with ricky. there they had pizza spread out on the dining table with everyone digging in to eat

as you sat next to ricky, he noticed you weren't indulging into the food like the rest of the members and slightly nudged you

"c'mon, try some." you shook your head, "i don't know, i'm just sad."

he rested his hand on yours, rubbing yours with his thumb

"there are plenty of fishes in the sea (name), trust me, you will meet someone who will sweep you off your feet."

"thanks ricky, i really appreciate your kind words." you smiled, gyuvin then handed ricky a plate for you to use.

"now will you eat?" he chuckled, you nodded and grabbed the last few slices

maybe this was better than being on that blind date, being with ricky's close friends and members

kim gyuvin

at the art exhibit, you were waiting on your date and continuously checked the time on your phone

you were losing hope on your date showing up as it had been nearly an hour of you walking around by yourself, they didn't even inform you of anything that had popped up or otherwise you wouldn't have been this nervous

the hour mark approached and that's when you lost hope, just then, a hand began poking you and you turned around to see...gyuvin?

"gyu? what are you doing here?" he chuckled and look around, "well, you told me that you'd inform me of when your date arrived for safety measures but then you didn't."

"yeah they never showed up." he pouted, "that sucks for them, missing out someone this amazing."

you softly nudged him as he flashed a smile, "stop it! but thanks for coming though. i probably looked so awkward just standing around here for an hour."

"don't worry, let's make this our own date then." he grabbed your hand and walked around the exhibit, "let's see, hmm, what do you want to check out?"

you slightly pointed at a painting on the other side of the room, "that one!"

"let's go then!" with his hand still interwined with yours, you walked there and began viewing it

even though things didn't work out the way you originally wanted to, gyuvin did a great job filling in as he came when you needed him

it made you wonder if this was what you needed all along, gyuvin to be yours

park gunwook

(wow another school themed one for the maknae line, who's shocked?? i promise i'll try and change it up soon)

well technically not a date per say, one of your classmates told you to come to the yard during lunch as they had something to tell you. they were someone you were crushing on for a while and you were thrilled that they finally noticed you

but it turned out to be a trick when you were left waiting there, feeling humiliated, you just wanted to cry

just then you heard footsteps trail behind you, "what are you doing? you've been standing there for like thirty minutes."

it wasn't your crush but rather gunwook! he was very popular and the class president in your homeroom

"oh-uh, well (crush's name) told me to come out here since he had something to tell me." you explained, still embarrassed by the event

he sighed, "don't trust them. they never follow up on promises and love to hurt people's feelings."

"oh is that so..." you mumbled.

"i'm sorry that happened to you. do you need anything to feel better?"

you shrugged and began walking back to the school building, "i just feel so stupid right now."

gunwook looked at you with sympathy in his eyes, "y'know what? let me treat you, want to go to that restaurant nearby for something quick to grab?"

you felt the corner of your lips go up at his words, "i would love that. thank you gunwook."

"quick! then our next class will start soon!" you two rushed to the restaurant while laughing

han yujin

the park was filled with people who came to relax outside, dogs were running around and so were kids who went to the playground. you were sitting on a bench waiting for a special someone to come, you had confessed to your crush and they agreed to meet up with you

but your worries of them not coming increased, with every minute, no one came. the sun was beginning to go down and a bunch of kids left the park with their parents as well as the dogs too

you were fiddling with your fingers out of boredom when one of the students in your class who was playing soccer from before approached you

"hey (name), what are you doing here?" it happened to be han yujin who was extremely popular at your school

"i dunno, my crush said we could meet up here."

"who?" you said the name and he seemed a bit taken aback by who you said

"them? but they're already dating someone else from what i heard?" your eyes widened. "what?! so they saw my confession and tricked me into coming here?"

it was honestly quite embarrassing being next to yujin and feeling as if your about to break down into tears

after a moment of silence, you stood up, "well, i guess i'll head home now."

he then grabbed your wrist lightly, "wait!" he shyly looked down, "i'll walk with you, just so your safe."

"thank you." you two began heading home together and with yujin's presence, you felt much more safer, though he didn't say much

you finally made it to your front door, thanking him once again, he left. but even still, you wanted to see him again. he made your heart flutter more than even your crush. it was then that you gained a new crush

#zb1 #zerobase1 #zerobaseone #zb1 fluff #zb1 scenarios #zb1 drabbles #zb1 reactions #zb1 x reader #park gunwook #sung hanbin #kim jiwoong #kim taerae #seok matthew #han yujin #shen ricky #kim gyuvin #zhang hao

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zbsinbloom · 1 year ago

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ZB1 Reaction: He did/said something hurtful in your dream (1/2)

🍀 ☘ 🍀 ☘ 🍀 ☘ 🍀 ☘ 🍀 ☘ 🍀

Pairing: ZB1 hyung line x reader

Genre: fluff, a bit of crack?, some angst

Word Count: 900+

Trigger warnings: a negative comment of the reader's appearance (Jiwoong)

🍀 ☘ 🍀 ☘ 🍀 ☘ 🍀 ☘ 🍀 ☘ 🍀

🍀 Jiwoong

He'd be going about his normal morning routine and he sees you're already up, so he goes to greet you

When you barely react and mumble a "hi" at him, he acts like a deer in headlights

Did he leave his socks on the floor? Did he keep stealing the covers in the night? Does his breath stink? Whatever it is he's dying to know what upset you

Asks you what's wrong with a pout, his mind is working overtime trying to figure out why you're being off with him

Finally, you sigh and decide to tell him… he called you ugly in your dream last night

He's trying not to laugh at you but the way you look so serious telling him that he did something (completely unrealistic) in your dream has him laughing in relief

Calls dream him an idiot and assures you that you are very much NOT ugly

🍀 Zhang Hao

He just woke up and snuggles into you, wanting to relax for a little while before you both get out of bed and get ready for the day ahead

Except he hears you sniffling quietly and suddenly the sleep leaves his body and he's on high alert

He assumes you had a nightmare so he starts rubbing your arm gently and humming for you

Which makes you cry more?? And that's when he's gonna ask you if you're okay because he's a little concerned at this point

You turn to look at him, tears in your eyes and your bottom lip quivering and his heart breaks, he never wants to see this again please he loves you so much

When you tell him that the two of you fought in your dream because you took one of his red panda plushies and refused to give it back, his heart melts because ?? you're so cute

You best believe he pulls you into his arms, telling you he'd let you steal a red panda plushie if that's what you wanted

☘ Hanbin

He's having the sweetest dream ever and wakes up ready to wish you a good morning, but is kinda sad when your side of the bed is empty

But he assumes you woke up a while ago and are going about your day, brushing your teeth, showering etc. But he doesn't hear you in the bathroom or even downstairs

You weren't going out anywhere today, were you? Feels like a bad boyfriend for forgetting until he goes to see if you're still there and you're curled up on the sofa in a ball

Gets you something to drink and sits beside you. He instinctively goes to touch you but you pull away and he's confused in every language he knows

Eventually he gets you to tell him what's wrong because he sure has no idea what he said or did to deserve this

"Dream you told me you and Hao were adopting Yujin together." Man is torn between laughing at your admission and melting because that's the cutest reason you've ever been mad at him

Reassures you that Yujin is very much your and his son and that he wouldn't dream of adopting him with anyone else

🍀 Matthew

He comes home from a busy schedule ready to flop on the sofa and chill with you, his favourite person in the whole world

You'd texted him a couple hours ago to let him know you were taking a nap and that if you were still asleep to wake him up so you could talk about your day together

When he comes home and sees you, sitting on the sofa staring at a blank TV screen with puffy eyes, part of him is worried but the other thinks you just watched something sad

So when you refuse to look at him and tear up everytime he says something, he knows instantly that something's up

He goes to hug you but you don't reciprocate, and now he's wondering if something happened between you napping and now

You feel a bit silly admitting it, but you tell him that the two of you had a very heated argument in your dream because he was convinced snakes have arms

Like Jiwoong, he clowns dream him for being stupid (and for shouting at you)

☘ Taerae

He's already awake by the time you wake up, he'd come out from the shower and changed when you opened your eyes

He always thought you looked the most adorable when you were sleepy, so naturally he starts cooing at you

You start pouting which makes him laugh and tease you. Unfortunately for him, you've just woken up from a dream that has kind of upset you a little

You know it wasn’t real and that his actions in your dream don’t reflect your relationship in the waking world, but you can’t help it, it felt so real at the time

“Please don’t laugh at me, but I had a dream and you called me stupid because I said that straws have two holes and you said they only have one.”

And now all he’s thinking about is how many holes a straw has. Sorry but he’s a bit distracted now

“Baby I love you very much but I’ve been doing some thinking and well, straws only have one hole.” and now the two of you have joke arguments about straws

#zbsinbloom #zb1 fanfics #zerobaseone fanfics #zb1 reactions #zb1 scenarios #zumblr fics #zb1 gunwook #zb1 gyuvin #zb1 hanbin #zb1 jiwoong #zb1 ricky #zb1 taerae #zb1 yujin #zb1 zhang hao #zb1 matthew

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saelterlude · 9 months ago

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link click musical list pt.6, (longer bcs i keep accidentally posting these early, gotta make up for the short pt.5)

also hi, this one took a while bcs i keep getting sad over not finding a Wang Yifei-Zhu Hanbin LG uppies clip :')

(pt.1, pt.2, pt.3, pt.4, pt.5, pt.7 here)

81. 24/03/2024 night, Zhu Hanbin wore his shirt inside out lol, there's a good chance it was like that the whole performance since LG actors don't change costume. Also, I love how Zi bowen shouted his name, it's cute.

82. Cai Lu's short vlog, includes Guo Hongxu and Ji Xiaokun karaoke, JXK being bad at basketball, and chilling in the dressing room.

83. 28/03/2024, Cao Muzhi getting manhandled by Cai Lu (I drew it hehe) and also giving the biggest laugh when he won first round of RPS against Zhu Hanbin plss.

84. 01/04/2024, Wu Hanglu bullying Bai Zhuoming, Du Guangyi being aggressive, and BZM being confused and overwhelmed in RPS. If you're asking why DGY shouted his line, it's bcs BZM and WHL were too busy bickering to beckon him to the couch like they're supposed to do. Also, they sing 'Dive Back in Time' together.

85. 29/03/2024, Wang Yifei, please stop bullying Wu Hanglu, don't squish her, look at her, she's tiny. See? Now she's bullying you back.

86. 05/04/2024 night, piglet is back!! Wu Yihan, Cai Qi. WHY ARE YOU BOTH SO MEAN TO THE PIGLET?? WYH does not let CQ play around with RPS (by not doing them at all)

87. 05/04/2024 night, bonus to the performance above. WYH does not hug in "Pursuing Light" for once.

88. 06/04/2024 day, New Cai Qi pair unlocked with Guo Hongxu. Awkward eye contact and GHX just assumes he won RPS when he didn't lol, don't you know CQ cheats? Also, Zuo Yiping looks so short between them, helpp.

89. 30/03/2024 night, Wu Yihan going *finger points* "whos singing the sofa song?", and Qian Dongyue's birthday!

90. 13/04/2024 day, I think, Wang Yifei scared Guo Hongxu with that overly enthusiatic jump hug.

91. 13/04/2024 night, Jing Yanqiao 21st birthday!! Let's go! There's actually a full video of your encore now.

Also, #90 and #91, both GHX and JYQ caught off guard by WYF and ZHB's mic cupping habit during 'Dive Back in Time'

92. 06/04/2024 night, I can't find a clip showing Wu Yihan drinking vinegar, but I can show you Cao Muzhi being cute as he walks across the table. And saying 'be careful' in 'Dive Back in Time' bcs something happened with WYH offscreen, i think he hit a camera.

93. 06/04/2024 night, nevermind! Shimmer to the rescue! Here is Wu Yihan drinking vinegar! (he Du Guangyi-ed himself (#19 and #31))

94. 14/04/2024 day, Guo Hongxu has successfully been influenced to cup their mics. Also, I'm now declaring that Guo Hongxu and Wang Yifei is the perfect disgruntled cat-oversized puppy duo, just look at their hug.

95. 14/04/2024 day, another POV of the performance above so you can see Wang Yifei nod approvingly once GHX uses his method.

96. 14/04/2024 night, just a shortclip of Wang Minhui putting Cai Qi in a headlock.

97. Event clip, mostly just explaining the basketball event itself but I wanna show you all Du Guangyi being bad at basketball in the last 10 seconds.

(speaking of event, the theatre is gonna count which actor scores the most during basketball scene/"Faith of Friendship". me and the musical brainrot gang over in the lc 18+ server are doing bets on which actor is scores the most by the end of the month)

98. 19/04/2024, poor Deng Xianling just wanna tie her shoes, stop bothering her lol.

99. 19/04/2024, same performance as above. English boy Teng Chunpeng is very excited abt basketball.

100. 20/04/2024 night, have Jing Yanqiao, shamefully losing 2-8 to Zhu Hanbin

101. 21/04/2024 day, Bai Zhuoming won the match, he teases Wang Minhui about it the whole encore to the point he messed up the entirety of RPS song lol. (Also, they got 15-12, they were conspiring together)

102. 22/04/2024, Shu Rongbo getting startled by Cai Lu's leg and Du Guangyi adding to the leg jenga is very precious, I wanna draw that. SRB also won basketball 36-0 bcs DGY is a softie granpa, I guess we knows who wins this month.

(and no, as much as i favored him, i did not bet on srb :') )

(also, did i wait for the 22nd so i can get at least 1 srb video this post? yes.)

*Please give a big round of applause to @shimmeringweeds for all xhs clips. I could not navigate that site at all.

Bonus time! Made a list (here!) of Zhu Hanbin and Jing Yanqiao performances the other day, thus that's the bonus clips you're getting for this part. Please check them out, they're really cool.

But I guess I might as well add this funny video of Cai Qi and Cao Muzhi performing 'Mia Famiglia' from Apollonia musical. It's gold, just for the fact that CQ acts as if he's in a drama while CMZ acts as if he's in a comedy.

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mins-fins · 2 years ago

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totally not in love — park hanbin

taking y/n out to drink on his birthday was definitely a mistake.

it has been thirty minutes and hanbin has now lost him. he's been looking everywhere for him, fucking hell why did hanbin #1 have to go all out for y/n's birthday and rent this huge ass house!?

i mean— of course y/n deserved to have an all out birthday but hanbin might as well be stuck in a circus with how many people are around and how none of them look like y/n.

after thirty minutes of walking, asking, searching, and smelling the horrible breath of drunk college students, hanbin considers giving up, until he hears the familiar voice.

"hanbinie! my lovely!" a drunk y/n giggles as he stumbles towards him. hanbin catches him as he looks like he's about to fall. "i missed you, i was looking for you with the puppy looking boy".

"you mean gyuvin?"

"pfft—!" y/n breaks into a boisterous amount of laughter. hanbin stares at him like he's crazy, a small smile coming to his face as he notices how different y/n looks compared to when he first arrived no more than four hours ago. "yeah, that's what i said! the puppy boy!"

"y/n your drunk".

"no i'm not" he slurs his words, he giggles again as he sees hanbin's face. "you can ask my husband, lee seunghwan".

"lee seunghwan?" hanbin chuckles, raising an eyebrow. "your married to lee seunghwan?"

"yep!" y/n nods like it's common knowledge. "we live on a farm and we have seventeen cats!"

"is one of them named after hoshi?"

"yeah!"

y/n sighs dreamily, humming and doing a victory dance as if he's actually married to seunghwan. "we raised all of them together too, true story".

"that's nice, who were you with before again?"

y/n hums. "uh.. hanbin numéro uno, my biggest hater hao, woohyun oppa, puppy boy, and um uhh… edward cullen?"

hanbin laughs at those words, already being able to identify whose who with those descriptions. "also man in love! i don't know who he's in love with but he was there for a moment!"

"um.. okay, let me call your brother, he'll know what to do—"

"you don't have to!" y/n whines, a pout coming to his face. "i'm 21! i'm practically an adult! you can't call my brother!"

y/n pushes hanbin away and crosses his arms, stomping his feet for a moment. "y/n—"

"i don't wanna go home!" he shouts, pouting like a little kid who just got told they had to leave the playground. "take me to my husband!"

"your husband is probably trying to dive off the roof right now.."

hanbin jumps, immediately being met with the sight of kim taerae beside him. taerae does not look that drunk, which makes sense, because he has to drive junhyeon, jeonghyeon, and junghyun home after all of this is over.

"what happened to him?"

"i don't know, he spent like- a whole hour attached to seunghwan, i think he was actually convinced that they have seventeen cats together and live on a farm together".

"and i'm pretty sure he named one of them after his seventeen bias".

"i wanna kiss someone" y/n randomly states, and hanbin takes in a deep breath. "we should go find my husband, his name is lee seunghwan, we have seventeen children together".

"i thought you said cats".

"cats are children".

y/n states that like it's a fact. hanbin quickly grabs onto him before he decides to run away. "okay, your not gonna kiss anyone, y/n, you're way too drunk for this".

"what?" he pouts like he's sad once again. "your jealous i won't kiss you, hanbin numéro dos?" he asks, grabbing onto both of his arms and staring up into his eyes like he's so enamored by him.

"y/n—"

"will you turn into a frog if i kiss you?"

taerae snorts, covering his mouth with his hand as the words are so funny yet are asked in such a serious manner. "i'm sorry, hanbin" he says in a giggle. "i have to— i have to go find junhyeon, i have to take him home but, uh.. have fun".

"can i kiss you hanbin numéro dos?"

"no, you're too drunk to know what your saying".

"so if i was less drunk would you kiss me?"

y/n is now staring at him like he's the love of his life, and though hanbin would like to kiss him, he doesn't want to kiss y/n while he's like this. he knows y/n isn't being honest, for fucks sake he thinks he's married to lee seunghwan and living on a farm with seventeen cats, hanbin won't kiss him like this.

"y/n, your not getting kissed right now".

"aww" y/n whines, surprisingly pulling hanbin into a hug. "i'm 21, i need to have my cinderella moment".

"maybe later y/n".

y/n pulls away from the hug, staring at hanbin for a moment before he starts tearing up. the older immediately panics, watching as y/n now has tears running down his face.

"i— what.. why are you crying?"

"you don't like me?" he asks in tears, a small pout coming to his face as he stares at hanbin again. "i thought you liked me.."

"hey! don't cry!" hanbin exclaims, wiping y/n's tears with his thumb. "i— i do like you! i just can't kiss you while your this drunk, y/n, your mind isn't in the right place!"

y/n giggles, though still emotional. "i can't believe you decided to break my heart on my own birthday" he pulls hanbin into another hug.

"i didn't break your heart".

"you did! hanbin numéro uno would never do that!"

"what about the seventeen cats?"

"they're still my kids, don't be mistaken".

"okay y/n, let me take you home" hanbin states, and y/n does something between a nod and a shake of the head. he simply lets hanbin take his hand as he stumbles with every step.

"can i say goodbye to my husband first?"

"your husband who you just tried to cheat on with me".

"shut up i just wanted to see if you would turn into a frog!"

#park hanbin #boys planet #boys planet imagines #boys planet drabbles #park hanbin imagines #park hanbin x reader #boys planet scenarios #𑁍 ࣪˖ 𓂃 isa's works!

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gamerwoo · 2 years ago

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Omg please continue the Minghao and Jia drabble if you still want to, I love their lore so much!!

pfft well if ur gonna twist my arm i suppose i will 🙄

(i was waiting for someone to ask)

this is kinda rushed though because i didn't want to forget the idea and i poorly scribbled it down somewhere lmao. sorry if it kinda sucks <3

part 1 | tftp masterlist

»»————-　　————-««

"So that's how you found him?" Suvi giggled, thinking Jia and Minghao's story was the cutest love story she could've ever heard. "I can't believe it was right when Lilly died -- talk about fate!"

"It was pretty perfect timing," Danbi nodded. "Obviously everyone was really distraught, but Minghao had his mate there for him. I guess he would always tell the pack that she saved his life."

"Yup," Jia laughed softly. "Doesn't let me forget it."

"Hang on," Jooyeon interrupted, staring at Jia intensely. She had even leaned forward as she listened to the blind girl's story because she was so invested, "so what happened with XiuXiu?"

The girls were staying at Hanbin's place with the other mates while all the wolves were hanging out together at some secret werewolf-only speakeasy that Hanbin and his pack went out to from time to time. It wasn't often just the girls got to hang out together, and it was even more rare that they got to spend any time with the girls from Kyung's old pack. But all the boys wanted to get together before Minghao and Junhui's annual trip back to China. And this year, they were taking Jia with them.

The conversation originally began with Ari curiously asking what had happened to the rest of Hanbin's pack. Eunjin had screamed her head off as soon as she was on the property, which of course, startled everyone, so Hanbin had mentioned offhandedly that a lot of their pack had passed away before he went out with the other wolves. Ari being Ari, was curious and didn't know any better to have a filter, but the girls explained most of what happened.

That is, until they got sidetracked. Kyung talked about how Taejin was lured to his death by his mate, and Yeji had jokingly said, "Jia, imagine if Minghao had lured you to your death, huh?"

So that sparked the question of how did Minghao and Jia even meet since it happened in a dream.

"Or June!" Jimin added on.

Jia merely shrugged, "I don't know. I never saw either of them again."

"What?!" the thief whined. "No way! You have to know what happened to at least June!"

"What a shitty ending..." Kyung muttered.

"Do you think I'd see any clues as to where June went?" Jia laughed. "I'm blind."

"I can't believe we're just left on a cliffhanger like that," Seongmi sighed.

"How do you think I feel? It really makes me sad... I hope she's doing well, wherever she is."

"Why would she be the first dream you ever entered, though?" Soomin wondered. "It's so random..."

Rika shrugged, "Sometimes life doesn't give us answers."

"If you're Rinnie," Jimin was watching Kyung whisper translations in Cooper's ear, "it rarely ever does."

The boat ride wasn't Jia's favorite. She hadn't been on a boat since she had to flee when she was a child, so she didn't really remember the experience. She realized just how awful being stranded in the middle of the ocean on an unfamiliar vessel with a bunch of strangers was when you couldn't see anything.

Even if she could see, she was sure she would hate it.

"My parents are old," Minghao warned her. "They won't want to go out and explore with us. They're tired pretty often."

"That's okay," she assured him with a smile. "I'm excited to meet them no matter what."

"You think having old parents is bad?" Jun scoffed. "My baby brother looks older than me."

Appearance-wise, Jun and Minghao looked like they were in their 20's. And their bodies technically were. That was around the age that they stopped getting older until they met their mates. Minghao started aging again as soon as he met his mate -- physically, of course. Junhui was still stuck.

But despite their young appearances, they were both over 40 years older than they appeared. So both of their parents were much older than one might expect, and any younger relatives they had appeared to be older than them now.

On the way to Minghao's old house, he explained how he ran away from home as soon as he realized what he was. But he said his parents went out looking for him and wouldn't stop until they found him. He admitted what he was and ran away before either of them could accept him or turn him away. He just wanted to protect them Then he ended up finding Soonyoung, so he went off with him and never looked back.

"I was really close with my cousin, Yaling," he told you. "We were basically like siblings, so I told her to take care of my parents before I left. She tried to convince me to stay, but I knew how dangerous it was."

Jun was the one to convince him to return home half a decade later. Since he went to visit his mom, Minghao would often wonder aloud how his own family was doing, so finally, the older wolf coaxed Minghao into going with him. And that was when he realized his family had been searching for him the whole time.

"They put up missing persons pictures using a couple photos of me from family photo albums," Minghao chuckled at the memory. "It was crazy because it was five years later and I still looked like that."

Looking back, Minghao felt lucky that he reunited with his family so he could watch them grow and get old. It was bittersweet getting to see his parents gray while he stayed the same. He was grateful to still be loved by them so he could experience them getting older, but it hurt that he couldn't age with them.

But then there were happy moments, like watching his relatives that he grew up with -- like Yaling -- get married and have families.

"The Xu family reunion is huge," Junhui stated with a laugh. "Everyone shows up to see Hao."

Just as Jun promised, Minghao's parents' house was full to capacity when the trio arrived. While Jia couldn't see all the people, she could hear the commotion. It was overwhelming, but she put on her warmest smile and let the two wolves help her around as they introduced her to his family.

It was as Minghao was introducing her to his parents and Yaling that his mother was interrupted.

"Jia?" a female voice asked.

Jia's eyes wandered, her head turning toward the noise. She waited to hear something else, but all she heard was soft footsteps getting closer until they stopped in front of her.

"Your eyes look the same," the girl giggled excitedly.

Her head cocked to one side, "I-I'm sorry?"

"Xiuying, what are you talking about?" he asked her.

"I know her," she insisted before looking at Jia again. "Don't you remember?"

Minghao paused while he thought, and then his eyes seemed to brighten, "You two are about the same age. But if she knew you before she moved away... XiuXiu, she's blind now."

Jia's eyes suddenly widened and her entire body seemed to perk up.

"XiuXiu?"

"Jia!" she laughed again before throwing her arms around Jia.

Jia let go of Minghao's arm to hug her back, a smile so big spreading across her face that it made her eyes close.

Minghao looked to Junhui first, both boys sharing confused looks before he turned to Yaling for answers. Somehow, his cousin looked like she knew exactly what was going on and she was shocked.

"Did you know?" Minghao asked her.

"I-- ...I thought Jia was imaginary..." was all she said.

"XiuXiu's dreams were the first I ever entered," Jia explained once the two girls pulled away. "Aside from my dad's, of course. I only ever saw her dreams up until I had to leave home."

"I was wondering where you went!" Xiuying was still laughing -- out of both excitement, joy, and shock.

"XiuXiu cried for days," Yaling nodded. Then she imitated her wailing of, "'Where's Jia! I miss Jia!'"

The rest of the reunion was sweet and happy. Everyone was excited to see Minghao and meet his mate, and the two girls were practically inseparable. But somehow, it seemed to make his parents even more fond of Jia -- although, it was hard to not be fond of her in the first place.

That night, after everyone had gone home and Minghao's family retreated into the own rooms and made sure Jun was settled in the guest room, Minghao and Jia curled up together in Minghao's old room that his family kept for him. And as they were winding down, of course Minghao had to bring up his mate's history with his 'niece'.

"How come you never mentioned XiuXiu?" he asked.

Jia shrugged as she pulled the covers up, "It seemed a little pointless. I obviously wouldn't expect you to know who she was, so why would I mention the random little girl I used to visit?

"Actually, what about you?" she asked with a frown, turning it around on her mate. "How come you never mentioned XiuXiu talking about a Jia?"

He chuckled, "Because Jia isn't an uncommon name, and I never heard about a Jia after Xiuying got older. I figured it really was just an imaginary friend like everyone else. Plus, I only saw her once a year so her Jia never really stuck with me."

"Sure, HaoHao," she chuckled, sliding down the bed until her head touched the pillows.

"You know what that means, right?" Minghao asked as he followed suit.

"Hmm?"

"You've been connected to me for a long time," he giggled. "You've always been made for me."

Jia scoffed as she rolled over to snuggle into Minghao's chest, "I always knew that."

There was a pounding on the wall before the pair heard Junhui call just loud enough for them both to hear, "Could you wait until I fall asleep to be disgustingly cheesy?"

#anonymous #svt tftp

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miss-dollita · 4 months ago

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��#𝑯𝑨𝑵𝑩𝑰𝑵𝒁𝑯𝑨𝑵𝑮 𐙚˙✧˖°📷 ༘ ⋆｡ ˚

⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚ 𝒊 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒃𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒏 𝒎𝒚 𝒔𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓 ˚˖𓍢ִ໋🪽✧˚.🦢⋆

𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ˚˖𓍢ִ໋🪽

————————————𐙚˙✧⋆ ｡————————————

— 𐙚˙ 𝐇𝐚𝐧𝐛𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧. An angel, even. He's always a good person. His parents knew. His girlfriend knows, and she knew. His best friends knew. His fans know. The whole world knows. He gives out generous donations to charities, he helps out at the homeless shelter, he helps old people cross the street, he’s volunteered at other places, he’s a doctor, he spoils his girlfriend—he even actively speaks out against violence.

So you can only imagine how a fan of their idol, someone they aspire to be, felt as they were getting killed by what’s known to be an angel.

He knows he was a good person. He was told by his friends that he was a good person, so how could he not know that he was good? All his fans tell him that he is a good person, so how can he not know that he, himself, is a good person? His girlfriend knew he was a good person, so that should be enough proof there.

But sometimes, he knows he doesn’t deserve to be called a good person when he sees the look of betrayal and fear in one of his fans’ eyes, seeing them wonder why they were so foolish to believe everything they see on the internet—why they were so foolishly hellbent on thinking that he is a good person.

Even then, his friends said he was a good person. His girlfriend said he was a good person too. But he used to see the same fear, sadness, and betrayal from a girl he was once friends with from elementary to middle school. Nobody knew that he saw that in her face almost everyday until she finally couldn’t take it anymore.

He was such a monster that she couldn’t take it anymore.

His best friend looked at him the same way at the beach. His parents looked at him the same way. His girlfriend looked at him the same way. His sister looked at him the same way.

He looked at himself the same way.

And as he discards the knife, his phone rings to see his girlfriend calling him, asking himself why she cane back to him—why she stayed—why she still 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒅 someone she knew wasn’t a good person, why she tells other she knows he’s a good person. He answered the phone to talk to the girl that thought he changed. That knows for sure that he changed. She knew he was a good person. She knows he’s a good person.

She needs to pick one.

He said he’d be home in a bit—that he has some things to take care of, like signing his books at Barnes & Noble, something he’s known for doing frequently. But never at night.

He’s a liar. Barnes & Nobles closes early on Sundays. However, not all of them do. Maybe he really did drive 30 minutes to the one still open because he loves his fans so much. She knows he’s a good person. She knew he was a good person.

But he knew that someone else knew he wasn’t a good person. He knew that one of his friends, a friend that had seen it all, that was smart enough to know it all, knew that he isn’t a good person, nor that he never was in the first place, starting high school. He was incredibly smart. Smarter than Hanbin. He was a detective that solved all the hardest cases.

And yet, he never snitched on him. Why doesn’t he snitch on him? Why does he allow him to kill all these innocent people? Why is he perceived as innocent—the same level of innocence as his victims? He has the power to put Hanbin in jail. He has all the evidence needed that other detectives couldn’t even come close to finding. Does that make him a bad person as well? Does that make him a good person for saving him? Or is he planning something?

Maybe protecting his girlfriend from the hard truth? But that last part couldn’t be it, because he knows that she knows. She picked how she perceived him a long time ago, and still stayed.

All the other questions, however, he can’t find answers to. He finished getting rid of the body, put on his coat to hide the stains on his dress shirt, and left. It was time to move on with life and continue to play pretend with the world, taking every compliment, excitement and love he got from fans that recognized him, while his victims who once shared the same love, excitement, and compliments stay behind.

No fan is the exact same, but they do potentially share the same fate. Unless they live outside of the United Kingdom, of course. He doesn’t plan on traveling right now. He does, however, plan on having another meet and greet soon, saving someone’s life as a doctor, donating to charities, volunteering at some places, and speaking out against violence and the very serial killer that he was to let the world keep thinking that he is a good person.

Maybe he’ll buy his girlfriend a few gifts on the way home while he’s at it.

@𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬-𝐝𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐚 ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა — if anyone somehow stumbles upon this, don’t steal, repost, or copy my shit 💀

#𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐛𝐥𝐞 𐙚 #𝐨𝐫𝐢��𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫 🪽#𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐛𝐢𝐧𝐳𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠 ʚ𓂋ɞ #𝐬𝐞𝐦𝐢-𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐞-𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞 ☁️

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boysplanetrecaps · 2 years ago

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Boys Planet Eps 9-10 Recap: Say My Name

Hello, beautiful people! As you may know, I already wrote a recap/master post for episode 9, and another one for episode 10. This recap focuses just on the stuff that’s relevant to team “Say My Name” -- so their rehearsal period and their additional focus/footage in episode 9, as well as their rehearsal footage and performance in episode 10. Just say “read more” and all will be revealed.

The Trainees

Here’s a list of the trainees in this group, and their ages, along with their rank as of episode 8 and their two previous missions:

Sung Hanbin - 21 1 / Love Me Right/ Tomboy

Han Yu Jin - 16 3/ Back Door / Law

Seok Matthew - 20 4/ Kill this Love / Love Killa

Kim Ji Woong -24 5 / Back Door / Love Killa

Yoo Seung Eon - 19 17 / Very Nice / Home

The First Rehearsal Segment

At 23:20, we endure the gut-churningly uncomfortable atmosphere at team Say My Name for a solid eight minutes.

The editing is really pushing the drama, by beginning in medias res, with Matthew saying “Really? If only I knew, I would’ve been better off to join team Switch. I feel like you guys are ditching me a bit.” Then, crying, he gets up and leaves the room. No one follows him. Sung Hanbin’s perfect face is hard to read -- a mixture of sadness and determination.

WHAT COULD HAVE HAPPENED?

We jump back in time to find out. The team is having their first rehearsal after T h e G r e a t R e s h u f f l i n g, and they need to redistribute parts.

The team agrees that Yujin should keep the Killing Part -- Kim JiWoong says that Yujin would look yeppo (pretty) in the part.

(Side note: They mention that Ollie was the other one with the Killing Part -- I’m sure the team never had the plan to let him keep it. Poor Ollie. He would have done great with it, for what it’s worth.)

The bigger battle is, who will be main vocal? Yoo Seung Eon, the titanium voiced cutie pie, says: “The main vocalist of this song should lead the choreography rather than showing off vocal skills. I think it’s about getting the feel right. I think Hanbin should be the main vocalist.”

Let’s take some time to let that sink in. Seung Eon, the lowest ranked on the team, whose major claim to fame, really his only claim to fame, is his voice, is giving up the main vocal part. And not just any main vocal part -- a main vocal part that is practically the killing part or center or whatever you want to call it. Why? For the good of the team. He interviews, “Of course I wanted the part. But I thought things would go smoothly if I just switch my position.” Aww! What a sweetheart.

So. Now, what part will he get? Does he want Sub-Vocal 1, with its 41 seconds of singing time?

That’s been Matthew’s position, and after a pause, Seung Eon says, “I think Matthew fits in that part well,” and agrees to take Sub Vocal 2. No one wants to have any more drama today, so the team decides to just go with it rather than have auditions or even discuss it further.

In an interview, Matthew says, “I was thinking of asking [Seung Eon] if he wants to give [sub vocal 1 ] a try. But Sub-Vocal 1 is the part I wanted the most. I thought it’d be weird to tell him to go for it too.” Production asks, “Were you afraid he’d just take it?” Matthew replies, “I was a bit scared because he’s so good.”

The comparison is so obvious and in our face that I barely need to point it out -- but I’ll point it out anyway. Seung Eon gave Hanbin an extremely desirable part because he thought that Hanbin would be better at it. Matthew was scared that Seung Eon would steal “his” part because Seung Eon would be better at it. Their motivations seem diametrically opposed.

Later, the team is practicing singing the song. It’s becoming obvious that Matthew’s part is a bit too high pitched for him, and Seung Eon’s part is a bit too low pitched for him.

Leader Hanbin takes time out of his schedule of taking care of baby bunnies to give an interview, in which he says that the parts were distributed wrong because the team was in a hurry, and he’s “not used to negotiating things.” Then a thousand daisies spring up at his feet, so he picks them and finds some lonely elderly ladies to give them to.

The next day, Hanbin is still trying to think of a non-confrontational solution to the problem (confrontation would startle the flock of white doves that flutter around his head!) when Kim Ji Woong suggests the solution -- that Matthew and Seungeon switch parts. I mean, it’s obviously the solution, if Matthew’s part is too high and Seungeon’s part is too low. Hanbin asks them to try each other’s part, and it sounds so much better.

Hanbin tries to sell it to Matthew, saying that Sub-Vocal 2 has more character than the “basic” main vocal and sub-vocal 1 parts, and Ji Woong points out that Matthew will shine more in a part that suits him better, which will be better for the team, too. Matthew isn’t buying it. In fact, he thinks the whole thing is a hidden camera prank. Everyone says it isn’t, but he doesn’t believe them.

Oh boy. On the one hand, I can understand why Matthew would maybe think it was a hidden camera prank. After all, En Garde did that to Park Gunwook, and maybe Matthew heard about it and they do that kind of thing all the time on the show. Also, he wanted this part so much, it’s almost as if he’s going through the stages of grief -- denial and bargaining and all that. I can understand that. But it’s really hard to watch.

As Matthew begins to think that maybe this is real, he says that he’d be "doomed" if he lost Sub-Vocal 1. He interviews that Seung Eon can do high pitched adlibs, and he himself cannot. He says, “If I become sub-vocalist 2, I’d just be gone! There’s nothing! I can’t do it! I’m just someone passing by. I’d just be like, ‘Hello.’”

Here, Matthew is hampered at least a little by his comparative lack of ability to speak Korean -- he’s explaining himself as best he can, though, and I think his point is clear. He feels like if Seung Eon is on sub-1, and he himself is on Sub-2, no one will notice him.

Matthew is again motivated by anxiety, which is completely in keeping with what we’ve seen of him so far on the show. While I can’t fault him, as this must be the most awful environment for an anxious person --- like, I want to reach for a bottle of diazepam just thinking about what it would be like to be on this show -- it’s also absurd for him to be threatened by Seung Eon. Matthew is ranked in 4th place currently, and yes, that is a drop from where he was in episode 5. But oh my God, Matthew. At the second elimination, you had almost three times the voting points that Seung Eon had. And it’s not as if you’re going to win the audience vote in this song. You’ve got to know that Hanbin is going to win, right? He’s going to smile at the audience, and everyone in the theater will pass out in bliss and wake up cured of all disease, and that’ll be that. So why stress about it?

Also, Matthew, sweetie, what on earth makes you think that the Star Creators at home vote based on how you do in the performances? If that were the case, wouldn’t Takuto have been eliminated in Episode 5? Wouldn’t Lee Yedam still be on the show? Listen to BPR-Noona, ok? You’re doing all this so the audience will like you, but in doing it, you are making the audience not like you. You’re creating this hell for yourself.

Nothing Matthew does is unforgivable or anything. But I’m not going to pretend that this is anything other than what it is. I’m bummed for him, because if he had just switched parts right away, and been sweet about it, it would have worked out so much better for him. As it is, a lot of people in the audience are probably getting really frustrated with him for being unable to accept reality (“I STILL think that this is a hidden camera!” gets pretty irritating after a bit) and for being so selfish in comparison to the saintly Seung Eon.

Second Rehearsal Segment

Ok, so let’s skip to 1:58:42, still in episode 9.

It’s performance day, and Key introduces the Say My Name team. We pan the audience and see signs for Han Yujin, Kim JiWoong, and others, along with many signs for Matthew.

Because it’s kind of fun to be able to spot the signs, you might want to be on the lookout for certain Korean letters/symbols. Seok Matthew’s name written in Korean looks like this: 속매튜 Or you might see it just Matthew, 매튜. The square in the first symbol of Matthew is the M, and the thing that looks like a skinny H is an “ae” sound, and the thing that looks like a capital letter E is the “t” sound. So compare that to Kim Tae Rae 김태래 -- you can see the M in the bottom of the first symbol, the T at the front of the second symbol, and the “ae” at the end of the second two symbols. And that’s your Korean reading lesson of the day!

The point, though, is that the audience is losing its shit over Matthew, which serves to remind us that his anxiety is kind of unfounded.

The team is backstage, ready to perform (they won’t actually perform until episode 10, of course). They look anxious.

We cut to more rehearsal. The team is sitting around uncomfortably. Matthew is saying that he wishes he had gone to the “Switch” team if he was going to have to do Sub-vocal 2. He’s saying it with a big smile on his face, which is something he tends to do -- say something like it’s a joke when it’s serious. No one else is smiling. Hey Matthew, I bet someone on Supercharger would still switch places. Go ask Woongki. He’d be delighted to be sub-vocal 2 on Say My Name.

Thing is, smile or no smile, Matthew is angry. You can tell. And saying this, when it’s no longer possible to switch, is clearly just an attempt to make everyone else feel bad.

That’s an angry face, my friends. It’s not a felony. I’d be angry too. But he IS angry.

And then, Kim JiWoong, with his superior emotional intelligence says, “But Matthew, you need to consider the teammates you’re working with. I don’t think now is the time for you to do only what you want. I think someone who fits the part should do the part.” Oh my god, JiWoong, thank you. It had to be said.

Matthew interviews that what JiWoong said hurt him, and I was thinking, “oh, because you realize that you’re being kind of immature and entitled and you feel bad about it…?” but no. He is sad because he wonders if they all “didn’t believe in [his] ability.”

JiWoong says they have to think of the team. Matthew says that him keeping the part he wants is for the good of the team. Hanbin tells Matthew again, that this isn’t all about Matthew. And Matthew can’t believe that his friend has turned against him, because again, this IS all about Matthew, for Matthew.

It’s hard for Matthew because he feels like he has no choice in the matter, but like, that’s how this always works. When you try out for the Killing Part or Main Vocal and the team votes for someone else, you can’t just decide “well guess I’ll take the part anyway.” And yeah, you had the part, but now you’re losing it. That happens.

I am not being mean on purpose, you guys. I don’t want to pointlessly bash Matthew when he’s making kind of an ass of himself on an international stage. I’m going to take this moment to be profoundly grateful that no one was recording me at those moments in my life that I made a complete ass of myself. Let’s all be profoundly grateful for that, right?

Yoo Seung Eon speaks up, apologizing for not speaking up earlier about wanting the part (not your fault, Seung Eon) and just being sorry in general. Seung Eon’s complete sweetness gets through to Matthew, who is now crying. He says, “Seung Eon, you have no reason to feel sorry. This happened because you’re good.”

The thing is that that’s not totally the case -- Seung Eon is good, of course, but the bigger issue is the pitches, and I wish Matthew understood that. Seung Eon doesn’t sound great as subvocal 2 any more than Matthew sounds great as subvocal 1. Keeping them in their current parts would be like choosing the super tall person to be on your baseball team, and choosing the person who can throw 100 mph to be on your basketball team. You want to put the right person in the right position.

Matthew goes out into the hall to kind of deal with his feelings, which is a good idea. And then he interviews that the reason he wanted to sing Subvocal 1 is that the lyrics were mostly in English, and he wanted his mom to enjoy listening to him sing in English.

Argh, I am trying so hard not to be mean about all this but I mean, I can’t not know that this is a lie. He’s lying.

Consider the following:

Matthew’s first reaction on hearing he was going to lose the song wasn’t, “oh no, my mom…” but “I’m doomed.” In what world does missing out on a special thing you wanted to do for your mom equate to being doomed?

Matthew said in an interview, “If I become sub-vocalist 2, I’d just be gone! There’s nothing! I can’t do it! I’m just someone passing by. I’d just be like, ‘Hello.’” That’s all unequivocally about wanting center time. There is no second interpretation of this comment.

Matthew is very close to Hanbin and fairly close to JiWoong at this point -- if this mom thing was true, he would have felt comfortable talking to them about it.

Now, the “doomed” comment -- I can see one interpretation of this that isn’t just about wanting center time to avoid elimination. It might have been a reference to Matthew’s difficulty in learning Korean lyrics -- he may have been worried about having to learn the lyrics to a whole new part. But if so, say so! That’s a valid concern -- why lie? What is that?

Another issue is that Matthew’s characterization of Sub-Vocal 1 as being “half English” is a massive exaggeration. SV-1 has one line fully in English (“can I be your boy? Can I love you more?”) but otherwise is mostly in Korean.

Here’s the complete lyrics that SV-1 sings (not including parts where they all sing or where SV1 and SV2 sing together).

Eeny, Meeny 이제서야 Your turn Let me let me know 말해줘 Baby 매일 아침마다 / 이미 우정엔 금 갔지 더 고민해 봤자 시간만 / 떨림이 말해주네 대답은 그걸로 충분해 Can I be your boy? Can I love you more? 네 주위 아무것도 아닌/ 애들도 난 거슬리지 Just say my name 늘 부르던 부르던 세 글자 Say my name 또다시 두근거려 시간이 멈춘 것 같아 / 떨림이 말해주네 대답은 그걸로 충분해 / 친구 말고 Love oh baby

Here’s the complete lyrics that SV-2 sings (again not including parts where they all sing or sing together).

Just say my name, Just say my name 네 옆에서 언제까지 Yeah 해야 할지 남사친 그거 초코우유 나야 / 재고 또 재는 손 크기 그냥 확 잡으면 어떨지 / 어제 이름과 좀 다르게 설탕 한 스푼 더 추가해 / 네 모든 걸 다 기억 자신 있어 Come here 어제 이름과 좀 다르게 (Changer!) 설탕 한 스푼 더 추가해 (Special!) 이 순간 흐르는 잠깐의 정적 어제 이름과 좀 다르게 (Changer!) 설탕 한 스푼 더 추가해 (Special!)

They’re both mostly Korean. Even that line at the beginning of SV-1, “Eeny, Meeny 이제서야 Your turn/ Let me let me know 말해줘 Baby” -- Eeny meeny isn’t real English and having that be mixed in with so much Korean, your ear stops distinguishing English lyrics and sort of just hears sounds, with the “baby” at the end, you know? It’s not this overwhelming English sound that you hear.

So yeah, the mom excuse is just a lie, and for me, that’s the part that really bums me out, because I want to like Matthew. I kind of naturally root for the North Americans, because I am one, you know? And if he had just said, “I’m so sorry and embarrassed I made this uncomfortable for everyone. I should have been more understanding about why we had to change parts. I don’t have any excuse, I was just so anxious about everything” -- if he said something like that, I’d forgive him immediately because again, the pressure they’re under is absurd. It’s natural to feel that way. Just own it. But instead, he lied.

And one reason that I say that Matthew is not being evil edited is that the show seems to be presenting this obviously false explanation as true.

Look at the screenshot above. He’s talking about how Sub-Vocal 1 has so many words in English, and the on-screen images are backing him up. What they’re NOT showing is the lyrics in SV-1 that are in Korean, which is a lot of lyrics, nor are they showing the lyrics from SV-2 that are in English. They show him crying while talking about his mom and they play stirring violin music the whole time. The show is sympathizing with him.

I’m still not saying that he’s a bad person or that any of this is unforgivable. He’s a human being and it’s natural to be defensive and anxious and all these things. It’s cool if you forgive him. Just face reality, is all I’m saying.

Anyway.

Ok, so we see the five trainees doing their intro bit on stage, and as I expected, they’re clearly doing a high teen concept, complete with a school setting on stage and all that. But we’re not really going to see the performance yet -- we’ll have to wait for episode 10.

Final Segment

We’ll skip to episode 10, at 49:30. Key introduces the team again, and the boys come up to introduce themselves.

We see Lee Hwanhee in the audience for a picosecond, holding up this sign:

I think it says “Ji Woong-ee hyung”.

The team says they want to be your first love -- they’re team Say Yes! Then Key makes Han Yujin say “noona I love you” over and over and I want to call Child Protective Services.

Then they ask Matthew about his rehearsal experience, and we go into flashback mode. This isn’t just a flashback, this is a flashback to what we’ve already seen -- the team explaining that he’s not a solo artist, and him going to sit down in a lobby area. The on screen captioning is again defending him, saying “he understands his teammates, but he can’t calm down.”

Then the on screen captioning says “one hour earlier”, but I’m almost certain that they really mean one hour later, or else nothing makes sense. MNET, can you just tell the story in order and not jump around so much for no reason?

Hanbin gives his team a plate of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies (baked goods spontaneously generate whenever he laughs) and tells them to take a 10 minute break while he checks in on Matthew, who is hanging back.

It says Soek Matthew on the left, and Sung Hanbin on the right. (By the way, the little symbol that looks kind of like a ^ symbol, that’s the S in Korean, so on the left that’s the S for Soek and on the right it’s the S in Sung. As a reminder, the square is an M and the E is a T and the H is an “ae” sound.)

Anyway, Hanbin is checking in on Matthew, who he senses is having a hard time. Matthew denies that anything is wrong, but he’s obviously kind of sulking. They try to rehearse together as a team, but Matthew is still not feeling it.

JiWoong interviews that he feels bad for doing what he had to do, that he’s not sure how to treat Matthew from now on, and that this has been hard on him too. JiWoong has the necessary emotional intelligence to do the hard work between friends, but that doesn’t mean he likes it. Look, I’m happily partnered and am not looking to date anyone else, but my friends, that is some boyfriend material right there. Being too passive to the point that you can’t even communicate about what’s on your mind just allows things to fester. Nothing against Hanbin, who is truly trying his best and doing a decent job, but JiWoong is the hero of this story. Find yourself a person who can communicate like that.

We cut to dance rehearsal with the psycho dance teachers, who ask Hanbin and Matt about their bromance. Turns out they never actually performed together on the show. Leader Hanbin shoos away a herd of passing unicorns, then explains that the group has been training for a week, but that they just changed some parts today.

The dancing doesn’t go well -- the judge yells at them because the mood "isn’t cute" -- especially Matthew, who isn’t “managing” his facial expression. They try again, and Matthew continues to sulk. The dance teacher reminds them that they have to not let any conflict between them show on stage. They try a third time and it still doesn’t quite work.

Matthew’s interview comes in like a voice over, narrating over the scene, saying that he feels bad that he made the mood like this and got his teammates in trouble. He says, “I realized that I can’t keep being like this. At this rate, I might screw up our performance.” Good, Matthew, good start. You’re on your way! Keep it up.

The fourth time through, they manage to pull it together.

Later at the dorms, JiWoong goes to visit Matthew. JiWoong is wearing what appears to be pinstriped pajamas. Of course he is. JiWoong asks if Matthew is ok, then adds, of course you’re not. Matthew is still held back a little bit by not being 100% fluent in Korean, so it’s hard for him to explain his exact feelings, but it’s something similar to betrayal. You know, that feeling that Woongki and Seo Won and Ollie and Takuto probably felt when you voted them out of the team? I mean, just sayin’, there’s plenty of betrayal going around, and it’s probably better to count your blessings.

JiWoong says, “I considered all day whether or not I should talk to you. In any case, I should apologize to you since the parts were changed [so late].” Matthew says he understands why JiWoong did what he did and that his (Matthew’s) reasons for wanting SV-1 were selfish. (We don’t see any further mention of the Mom/English lyrics story.)

JiWoong says he needs to be a good hyung (older brother figure) to Matthew, but it really goes beyond that -- he’s the embodiment of forgiveness and patience. He said what he needed to say and now he doesn’t hold a grudge. Next time someone pisses you off, think, WWJWD? And unless that thing is showing your nipples, do that thing. I mean, unless it’s a good time to show your nipples. I don’t know your life.

Matthew commits to Sub-vocal 2 and begins working on the lyrics. They’re tricky for him, which backs up my theory that part of his issue was fear at having to learn a new set of lyrics.

We see the team rehearsing and they all seem to be getting along much better. At dress rehearsal they do a great job, and Matthew is all smiles. The judges cheer. Matthew interviews that he has finally realized that the team is the most important thing. Good!

Honestly, I really can forgive Matthew for all of this, but the whole Mom/English lyrics bit was really… icky. Just come out and say it, guy -- say, “I wanted the big part because I’m anxious because my rank fell a lot from 2nd to 4th and I’m worried that I won’t debut after all and it’s all I can think about.” That’s fine, that’s a normal way to feel. Sigh. But I guess he thought that the audience at home wouldn’t forgive him for that so he made up the Mom lie?

Anyway, it’s finally time!

The performance begins.

My take: Well, the thing is, I’m not really into this kind of song -- new jack swing lite, I guess you could call it -- but I try to critique songs within their genre, and for a song of this genre, it’s ok. It’s cute. It doesn’t grate or irritate.

What’s more relevant is that the boys do a really good job with it. Their dancing is lively, their singing sounds great, their on-stage chemistry is convincing, and while I know they had an MR, I think a lot of their vocals were live and really, it was good. The staging didn’t compete with the performance, and their outfits made them all look cute. It all came together really well. The part where they all say their own names at the end is really cute, too.

I think that Matthew and Seung Eon did the best job in terms of stage presence. Weirdly, Sung Hanbin’s smile didn’t really convince me -- I saw stress on his perfect face, rather than cute happiness. He's still preternaturally charming. Han Yujin seemed to be holding back, but I’ve always thought that about him. And Kim JiWoong seemed a little uncomfortable. That’s just how they seemed to me and maybe I’m the only one who thinks that. I still think all five of these guys are super talented and I can see why someone would like them and vote for them.

After I wrote all that, I showed the performance to my fella and asked him what he thought, and he said that he thought the “chaotic teenager” energy they gave off suited the song. He picked out Matthew as the best one, picked out JiWoong as not fitting in (he said that the rest looked like they were confessing a crush, while JiWoong looked like he was promising a good lay), and said that Hanbin looked really exhausted. I swear that I didn’t tell him about the tension in the group, or that JiWoong was known for doing sexy concepts! He just picked up on that anyway. He’s not really into vocals or dance specifically so he was mostly judging based off of vibe.

I *am* into vocals, and I just want to say again how good of a job I think Yoo Seung Eon did. In other performances, I found his voice to be a tiny bit too thin and screechy for my taste, but he sounded much better here. I think he’s quite a talent and I’d love to see how his singing continues to improve as he matures and gets even more training. I actually think he’s ready to debut now but I also don’t think he’ll make top 9, so we’ll have to wait for the Yuehua boy group coming in, IDK, 2024. Seriously, I’m so looking forward to it!

Am I sad that TaeRae wasn’t the main vocal of this song? Yes. Yes I am. But I don’t hold it against them. Hanbin sang well, especially since he considers himself a dancer first.

Congratution on your gradution!

The Edit I think the edits on these five mission stages will all be kind -- we’re at the point when the show wants us to like every performance. Mostly they just show the performance, without a ton of instant replays or reactions, but they did have to interrupt a few times to see the audience losing their shit for Matthew. They even threw in a shot of Key smiling. When the song is over, they really dwell on the audience reaction. The audience is LOSING THEIR SHIT.

Afterwards Backstage, the boys are really happy and proud. Then Key walks by and says “you remind me of me when I was younger,” which is probably a moment that they’ll take out of the memory bank and stroke like a soft blanket on sad days.

We don’t find out who came in last, which was also the case for En Garde -- MNET jiggery fuckery again.

And who do you think wins the audience vote? Come on, take a wild guess! Was it... maybe... Sung Hanbin? Yes, indeed, it was -- with 826 points (so Haruto still has the highest individual score). It’s this Hanbin's first time coming in first -- he lost to Hui in Love Me Right and lost to Zhang Hao in Tomboy.

Am I crazy, or does there still seem to be a bit of awkwardness between Hanbin and Matthew? JiWoong talked it out with Matthew and cleared the air, but I think Matthew and Hanbin need to have a similar conversation at some point soon, or there will be awkwardness in their friendship for a while to go.

And that’s about it for this recap. Thanks as always for reading, and I’ll see you in the next one!

#boys planet recap #boys planet #sung hanbin #seok matthew #kim jiwoong #yoo seungeon #han yujin #say my name

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yunacoeur · 2 years ago

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hi hello this is a snippet i wrote to get a feel for the concept i wanted for yellow tulips (this is basically just a slightly different version of the moment he finds out it was a bet in the original, only it’s not a bet here🤭).

given that this was never meant to be posted, don’t expect it to be formatted well or to be my best writing. kiss kiss love you guys

“so you just-” he trails off, this incredulous look on his face. there’s so much tension in the air as it all hits him what’s been happening this whole time, “you manipulated me and tried to get close to me just so i’d get feelings for you? you’re telling me this was intentional?” his voice is getting shaky, and his hands are starting to tremble.

“yes, hanbin. i wanted to make you fall in love with me,” you say back, trying hard to remain calm, “and it wasn’t because i liked you. you had broken my friend’s heart, and i wanted to get revenge… for her.”

“i don’t understand why would you do this. even if i rejected your friend, does that warrant… any of this?”

you suddenly felt defensive, “i didn’t mean to take it this far! it was supposed to be a couple dates at most, you’d confess feelings, i’d reject you politely, and we’d move on. you’d be a little sad, but would get over it quickly,” you say, trying to get closer to him, but he takes a step away to keep distance, “i wasn’t trying to play with your feelings. at least.. not to the extent that you’re claiming.”

“i can’t- i can’t believe you, why would you… do you even at least feel differently now that you’ve spent the past month manipulating me? do you even feel bad?”

“of course i feel bad! i’m not a horrible person!” you say, but it’s starting to feel like the opposite.

“oh really? you’re not a bad person? i told you so many secrets and i confided in you and i told you i had feelings for you, and you think you’re not a bad person even though you only got close to me for revenge?” he’s close to crying now, his hands are trembling. he’s about one wrong move from completely breaking down, “did you ever even like me? or was it all just an act?”

“hanbin…” you say, but there’s nothing else you could say that would defend you right now.

he shakes his head, getting more and more upset. he can’t stop now even if you tried to reason with him, “it was, wasn’t it? you didn’t like me. no, you never once liked me. you complimented my hair and my clothes and my tattoos and it was all fake, right? you hated me every second we were together while i was head over heels for you!”

and he’s not wrong, but god he wishes he was.

“and when i told you i had feelings for you, you… you were probably thinking about how you had won, right? how you got what you wanted and i was just the fool who didn’t catch on soon enough that someone like you could never love me,” he’s crying now, trying to not make eye contact because of it.

you stand there, silent and speechless. even if you tried to deny it, he wouldn’t believe you.

“so congratulations, you won,” he says, wiping his tears with his sleeve, “you won, a-and this is your prize-” he gestures to himself, “-i… am your prize. you got exactly what you wanted. i’m a mess, and i can’t stop crying, and despite everything i still have feelings for you,” he laughs, as if either of you find it funny, “that’s what you wanted to make of me, right?”

#hurting his feelings is my favorite hobby lol love u shanbinnn #sung hanbin #zb1 hanbin #zerobaseone #zerobaseonefics #boys planet #boys planet fics #boys planet imagines #boys planet reactions #kpop #boys planet drabbles #zb1 #zb1 x reader #zb1 imagines #hanbin #hanbin x reader #hanbin fic

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faithst · 2 years ago

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WIPING ZB1’s KISSES OFF

pairing zb1 (ot8) x gn!reader

genre fluff

masterlist<3

— zhang hao

he thought he wasn't giving enough affection ☹️

so he gave you a kiss !

and then you wiped it off and he was like ‘🤨’

didn't ask though cause he assumed you unconsciously did that

so he placed another on your forehead 😗

and you wiped it off.. again.

didn't say much to that either and just left you alone 😃😃

he thought he was annoying you 😭

“well.. i’ll be over here if you need my kisses”

— sung hanbin

he always kisses you 🤭

it's a part of his daily routine

so when you wiped off his morning kiss

he was devastated 😰

how was he gonna start his day off good now???

instantly grabs your hands and asks you what's wrong

kisses your knuckles 😳

you didn't say anything and he's already apologizing (even if he didn't do anything)

“whatever i did, i’m sorry.. forgive me?” ☹️

— seok matthew

whenever he arrives home, he kisses you

why? cause he knows you miss him 😙

so when he came home today already puckering his lips

he saw you on your sofa, on your phone so he placed a soft kiss on your cheek 💋

and you wiped it off

"did you miss m- what was that for?"

already pouty 🫢

sits right next to you with crossed arms and a pout

but then you reveal to him that it was a joke and kiss him

he instantly melts 🫠

“unnecessary but you’re cute so it’s okay!”

— shen ricky

ricky isn’t the type to usually give kisses randomly yk

so when it does happen, you take full advantage 👍

but this time, you just wiped it off

he’s slowly blinking, trying to process wtf just happened 😐

“um.. okay?”

he has no idea what to do cause usually he’s the one that makes you flustered

now he’s the one thats flustered 😃

he looked so cute that you just had to give in and pepper him w kisses 🥰

“oh thank god! i thought i lost my rizz!” 😨

— park gunwook

doesn’t have a specific time when he kisses you

he just does ykyk

he’s loves kissing you and absolutely adores your reactions to his kisses 😊

so when you wiped one of them off, his whole world shut down 😔

his life flashed before his eyes

he thinks you’re gonna break up w him ☹️

so he prepares a whole long ass speech on why you should stay in his mind

he just stands there, fiddling with his fingers 🧍

he looks so sad and you couldn’t do that to him

“wait.. how did i fall for that?!”

en garde flashbacks 😭😭

— kim taerae

he’s the type of guy that when he sees you, he gives a kiss 🤭

so he gives them quite often

you just came back from work and taerae instantly goes up to you

boops your nose and places a kiss on it 😚

when you wipe it off, he just gets confused

he’s like: no, you’re not leaving without my kisses!

cups your cheeks and proceeds to kiss your entire face 🫠

you had to force him to stop

“hey! where are you going?? i’m not done!” 😓

— kim gyuvin

while he might be one to touch your face and poke your cheeks alot

i don’t think he kisses them often 😦

so when he does and you wipe it off

he’s FLABBERGASTED 😧

like how dare you wipe off his precious kiss 😤

“two can play that game”

gives you the silent treatment

you sit next to him? he moves to another place

you text him? leaves you on read

it wasn’t until you hugged him and apologised profusely 🙏

instantly melts into your hug and kisses your forehead 🤗

“ill let you off just this once” 🫡

— kim jiwoong

will kiss you at any place and at any time 🫣

he knows you love them so he does it very very very often

when you wipe it off, he doesn’t say anything 😐

just kisses you again

and you wipe it off.. again

“did i do something?” 🙁

genuinely thinks he hurt you

won’t let you go until he knows you’re fine

you say that you are fine and that it was a joke

he doesn’t believe you 😭😭

then he asks for permission to kiss you, it’s cute

“im sorry if i did anything to hurt you, can i kiss you?” 🥰

418 notes · View notes

clouditae · 4 years ago

Text

First Love | 18

Word: 3.8k

Beta reader: jinned

You first saw him in the multi-purpose room. Later learn his name, and on your third year, as he becomes your neighbor, you discover his lifestyle. Knowing your crush on him was nothing but that, you wanted to find the courage to look for love. Asking your friend for help, you’re pointed in the direction of the expert. Your neighbor, Min Yoongi

Chapter Index

You lie in bed, staring up at the ceiling as the hum of the air conditioner fills the silence. The scenes play in your head over and over again. The first time you tried to say those three words to Hanbin. The second time you tried. The third time. Groaning, you turn to your side to face the wall. No matter how many times you try to say it, the words never leave past your lips. It’s like there’s glue in your throat, and the words can’t make it past the substance. It sucks and you’ve never felt so confused. Why can’t you say it? Do you not feel it yet?

Maybe you should wait until you know, but when do you know? When do you know that Hanbin is the love of your life? How does all this work?

You ponder for a while before giving up on trying to nap, so you get out of bed and make your way towards your desk, pulling out your textbook and notebook to work on your homework. Even as you try and focus on the question in front of you, your thoughts refuse to concentrate on anything but the lingering question you don’t want to think about. You groan, shaking your head as you try and bring your attention back to the question you haven’t answered after staring at it for ten minutes.

“Focus, Y/N. Now is not the time to question your feelings,” you mumble to yourself, adjusting in your seat. Those thoughts don’t leave. It lingers and pesters, hovering at the back of your mind like a pest. You don’t hear the lock to the door unlocking, or Ari walk in and begin to talk when you toss your pencil in frustration and cry out, “I can’t say it.”

“Can’t say what?” Ari asks as the door closes behind her, the sound of her footsteps making its way across the room towards her desk.

“I can’t say ”I love you“ to Hanbin,” you confess, resting your forehead against the cool surface in front of you, homework long forgotten.

Ari’s quiet for a moment, taking in what you had just told her. “Maybe you don’t feel it yet?”

“That’s the thing,” you begin, sitting up and looking towards her, “I don’t think I’m ever going to love Hanbin like I hope I will.”

She frowns in confusion, cocking her head slightly to the side. “What do you mean?”

You avert your eyes as you reply, “No matter how hard I try and forget him, I can’t.”

“Y/N…”

“What I feel for Hanbin doesn’t compare to what I feel for Yoongi.” You finally look up to meet her somber expression. “And I hate that. I hate the fact that I can’t forget him.”

“What are you going to do?” she questions.

“What do you mean?”

She adjusts in her seat, draping one leg over the other. “If Yoongi stood in front of you right now, could you tell him what you can’t tell Hanbin?”

You open your mouth to give your response, but you say nothing. What you want to tell her doesn’t feel right, but what you really feel should not be what you’re feeling. You need to follow your head not your heart. However, your heart is louder than your thoughts, and as you open your mouth to answer, you feel at ease wanting to say it. “I–”

A knock at the door interrupts your answer. The knocks are quick and loud, desperate for someone to open the door so that the person behind the door can see you. Making your way towards the door, you grab the handle, twist and pull the door open. Hanbin stands on the other side, hair disheveled and out of breath.

“Hey,” he says, voice wheezy as his chest heaves.

“Are you okay?” you ask him, seeing drops of sweat fall from his temples.

“Let’s go on a walk?”

“A walk?” you ask with a frown. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

He nods, waving your question off with his hand. “You up for a walk? I gotta tell you something.”

You bite the inside of your cheeks before nodding. “Let me grab my phone and then we’ll go.” He nods, looking relieved that you agreed to go on this walk with him. Letting the door go as he holds it open, you walk towards your desk to grab your phone and bag containing your wallet and ID. You look to Ari. “I’ll be back,” you tell her. She nods in response as you turn back around and make your way out of your room, following Hanbin down the hall and towards the side exit. “Is everything okay?” you question again, leaving the building and making your way down the stairs.

When the two of you reach the ground floor, he takes your hand in his delicately as the two of you begin your walk out of the dorm parking lot and onto the sidewalk, down the slope and along the route the bus and shuttle takes heading towards campus. “Yeah, I just…” You feel him grip your hand. “I need to tell you something before you find out and you think of something different.”

You stop, forcing him to stop and face you. “What do you mean?” He looks at you with soft, confused eyes. “What happened?” you ask.

“Lynn transferred here,” he confesses, looking away in shame.

“Your ex?” He nods. You know Hanbin, and you know he would never cheat on you, but you know that Lynn is his first love–the girl he was torn about when they ended their relationship because doing long distance was hard. They didn’t end on bad terms. “How do you feel?”

“If I’m going to be honest… I’m confused.” He meets your gaze again. “I thought that since she’s on the other side of the world, I’d be fine and move on. I meet you and I feel like I can move on.” He hangs his head. “But then she shows up and it’s like those feelings never left, and the worst part is I’m fighting something I wish I wasn’t.”

You take his other hand in your free one, swallowing a lump in your throat. “If Lynn,” you begin, taking in a deep breath, “were standing here right now, would things make more sense?”

His eyes look hurt when you ask that. “Y/N–”

“That day at the bus stop,” you interrupt, shifting the weight in your legs, heart racing, “I was going to tell you something, but I couldn’t.”

“What was it?” he asks, voice soft and comforting.

You want to cry, and you almost do when your voice cracks as you say, “I wanted to tell you that I love you, but I couldn’t.” You attempt to clear your throat. “I don’t think I can say it.” You can’t stop the sob escaping past your lips, or the tears rolling down your cheeks. “I’m sorry, Hanbin,” you cry, releasing his hands as you wipe the tears away. “I’m trying so hard, but I can’t.” He takes you in his arms, holding you tight and close. “I’m sorry–I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay, Y/N,” he comforts, rubbing his hand up and down your back.

You shake your head. “It’s not fine. I want to love you, but I can't,” you sob into his shoulder. “You’re perfect and everything someone could ever want, but I don’t feel that way–I keep thinking maybe if I wait longer, I’ll feel it, but I don’t want to drag you along if I never feel it.”

“Y/N,” he begins, holding you tighter, “I feel the same way.” You separate yourself from him just a bit, your eyes meeting. “I care for you, and I have feelings for you, but”–he releases his grip around you and cups your cheeks–“I don’t want to drag you either.”

“You’re still in love with Lynn,” you whisper.

You can see in his eyes that he looks hurt and conflicted. “I’m sorry, Y/N. I’ve tried so hard to not fall back in love, but when I heard she was coming back the feelings lingered. Then when I saw her and it’s like those feelings never left.”

You shake your head, brushing your hand along his cheek as he let’s yours go. “She has your heart, and it’s not fair to stop you.”

His eyes glisten. “Who has your heart?” You’re quiet, afraid to answer because you’re not fully sure if he does. “Yoongi?”

Your eyes widen. “How…”

“The way you look at him and how you try so hard to avoid him, I figured he has yours in some way,” he replies, giving a small, sad smile. A smile you've never seen before. A smile that hurts you to look at. “Do you love him?”

It’s your turn to look away, head hanging. “I don’t know. I-I’ve had feelings for him for years, but I don’t know if it’s love.”

He lifts your head with his finger under your chin. “Well if he was right here, could you say it?”

There it is. The question asked for the second time today. When Ari asked you, you were sure of your answer. Now you’re confused–conflicted because you don’t know. You’re comparing Yoongi and Hanbin–comparing their personalities, attitudes and the little things they do differently. Hanbin is winning by a landslide, but you can’t say those three words to him. Can you say it to Yoongi?

“I-” You don’t know.

“Tell him how you feel, Y/N. Even if you don’t love him, it’s best to tell him what you feel because you’ll regret it if you don’t,” he tells you.

You can’t help but ask, “What does that mean for us?”

He smiles. This smile makes you cry. “You’ve made me so happy and I’m glad to have gotten to know you. You’re an amazing person, Y/N, and if Yoongi doesn’t see it, then he’s not worth it. Always know that you are beautiful and worth everything you don’t think you deserve. I hope you find your happiness.”

You choke back a sob as you reply, “I hope you find happiness, too. Lynn is a lucky person to have your heart.”

He chuckles. “I just hope something rekindles.”

You nod. “It will. She loves you, and I’m sure she’s waiting for you to go back to her.”

He wraps his arms around you once more and holds you tight as you cry in his arms. It’s after a few minutes that you finally stop crying and he releases you. “Want me to walk you back?”

You nod, taking his hand as you walk the short walk back to your dorm one last time. You can’t believe it’s over. This relationship that almost made it to one year is ending because your hearts don’t belong to each other. Why is life cruel? Why can’t you love him like you want to? Why are your feelings stronger for Yoongi? His heart doesn’t belong to you–he loves Sam. That cheater holds him close to her and you hate it. You hate feeling this way and not loving Hanbin.

This is crap.

The two of you stop at the gate of the dorms, holding each other’s hand tightly. “I love you, Y/N. I wish I could love you the way I want to.” He smiles, brushing his thumb along your skin.

You smile back. “I love you, too.” The two of you lean forward and press your lips against each other for the last time. Taking in the feeling and warmth he gives before the two of you separate.

“I’ll always be here if you need me,” he tells you, releasing your hand. You nod, watching him walk the way you two came from.

You want to cry, but you won’t. Instead you take in a deep breath and head towards your dorm. Out of everything you’ve experienced from this relationship, you’ll care and learn from it. Whatever happens next, you won’t let it be less than what you had with Hanbin. You won’t let anything push you around and make you feel small and scared.

When you unlock your door and enter the room, Ari is working at her desk, her body turning around to face you. She can see the red in your eyes as the door closes behind you. She gets to her feet and walks over towards you. “What happened?”

You smile as best you can. “We broke up.”

Her eyes widened in shock. Just like you, she isn’t expecting that. “What? What happened within those thirty minutes?”

You shake your head. “I’ll explain later, but for now”–You stand straight–“is Hoseok in his room?”

“Yeah,” she answers. “Why?”

“I need to talk to Yoongi.” Turning around, you exit the room and walk across the hall where Yoongi and Hoseok’s room is.

“Holy shit, Y/N. Are you sure?” Ari asks, holding the door open as she stands in the doorway.

You knock on the door, heart racing. “It’s now or never.” You two wait for a few seconds in silence when the door opens to reveal Hoseok.

“Y/N,” he begins, smiling wide until it fades, “are you okay?”

You ignore his question, asking, “Is Yoongi here?”

Hoseok shakes his head, glancing at Ari behind you. “He’s in the studio in the Music Building on campus,” he informs.

You give a simple nod, clutching your bag, double checking in your thoughts to make sure you have everything you need before running down the hall and out the building. “Good luck!” you can hear Ari call as the door closes and you jog down the steps, careful not to trip.

Reaching the ground floor, you see off into the distance the shuttle taking off. “No,” you groan, picking up your speed until you reach the sidewalk. Looking to your left, you notice a familiar bus parked by a restaurant and bus stop. You walk to the bus stop a bit away to your right. You suppose you’ll have to wait for the bus driver to get off break and head to the stop you’re waiting at.

You take your phone out of your bag and pull up a map of the campus. Where is this building located? Is it close to the buildings you’re familiar with? Is it on the lower side of campus? After a minute of searching, you find the building’s location, just as the bus pulls to a stop in front of you. You pull out your bus card, climb in, and press your card to the scanner. When you hear the beeping sound, you take the first seat available.

You’re scared. You’re scared as the bus drives closer and closer to the campus, taking no stops to pick anyone up. Your heart is racing and your palms are beginning to sweat as you clutch your phone tightly. You can’t do this–this is so dumb. Yoongi will think you’re stupid and you’ll look like a complete idiot for telling him something you’re confused about.

What do you do? Do you go to him and do it anyway? Do you get off the bus and wait for the next one to take you back to your dorms? What are you going to do?

The bus comes to a stop at the second bus stop on campus. When did you get here so quickly? You stand up and wait for some of the students to find their seat before walking off. This is the stop closest to where his building is. Right now, after you cross the street, you can either continue down the path that’ll lead you to the lower level of campus, or wait for the shuttle or bus to take you back.

What are you going to do?

Go forward? Wait here?

What are you doing?

Pick. Pick, Y/N.

When the signal turns green for you to cross the small road, your feet are running. You’re running down the pathway and towards Yoongi. If you stop–if you let yourself think, you’ll back down. You’ll give up and go back never knowing what he’ll say. Even when it’s a denial, at least you know how he feels rather than guessing and being left in the dark.

Right?

When you finally find the building, your heart is racing. You wonder if it’s from running or because you’re scared. You can’t think about it. If you do, you’ll quit and leave, and you don’t want to go back not knowing. After asking for directions, you take the elevator to the fourth floor. You feel like you’re going to throw up as the doors open to the fourth floor, an opening before you were chairs and desks line the walls with a few students sitting and studying in silence. Taking in a deep breath as you step out of the elevator, you look left and right down the halls, both lined with doors of what you assumed are studio rooms.

You don’t know which side he’s on, so you start right and begin to read all the names currently occupying the room. Left and right you don’t find his name, and the closer you get to down the hall, the more you feel yourself wanting to give up. You’re going to take the fact that you went right instead of left as fate telling you not to do this. And so as you get closer to the end of the hall, you’re accepting destiny faster than you thought you would. As the last two doors appear, you check both of them.

You almost trip from trying to turn around when you see his name. You really thought he wasn’t going to be down this hall, yet there’s his name. His name written in his handwriting plastered on the whiteboard next to the black door. You curse under your breath. He’s here. He’s on the other side of this door, waiting for you to spill your guts about everything.

You breathe, “Don’t think just go. Don’t think, just go.” Shaking off your nerves, you walk towards the door, twist the knob open and enter the room. You really didn’t think before entering. You didn’t think about who could possibly be in here–if he’s alone. You didn’t think. But to your luck it’s just Yoongi who is currently standing at a table of equipment you don’t know well enough.

He’s looking at you as the door closes behind you, your breath uneven as you try and calm yourself. You can do this. You got this. “Oh good,” he begins, standing straight before gesturing to the window in front of him with his thumb, “I can’t tell if the mic in there is working. You mind going in there and testing it out for me?” You’re completely caught off guard, unsure as to what you should do. “Well?”

You jump a bit and walk down the small hall next to his desk and open the door to the small room where only a mic and stool is placed. Yoongi’s voice booms in the room you’re in, “Just go ahead and talk into the mic when I say.” You walk up to the microphone, moving the stool out of the way. Watching Yoongi as he works the equipment in front of him, you bring your hands together in fear and take in deep breaths. You don’t have to tell him–he doesn’t need to know the real reason you’re here. You can just come up with an excuse. Yoongi interrupts your thoughts, “Okay. Just start talking–”

“I love you.” Oh shit you said it. You can’t go back now, but you can’t meet his eyes either. You can do this. “I’m in love with you. I-I’ve been in love with you since we first met, and I know that love at first sight isn’t real, but it hit me so hard when I met you. I thought it was just a crush, but the longer I felt it, the bigger it grew. Then you agreed to help me, and it just grew bigger–I couldn’t even tell Hanbin I love him because I don’t. I hate myself for dragging him along when you were always on my mind, but through those months of being together, it made me realize how much I’m in love with you.” You take in a deep breath. “I love you, Yoongi, and I don’t expect anything out of this, but I just had to tell you because if I didn’t, it would eat me alive for not telling you.”

Your breath is shaky as you finally muster up the courage to look past the microphone and at him. He’s staring at you with a blank expression. You don’t know what he’s thinking and it scares you. You said you just wanted to tell him, and that’s all you need, but you can’t help but feel saddened by his expression. You watch as his hand goes to the buttons in front of him. “I couldn’t hear you,” he begins over the speaker, “guess it’s broken. You can come out now.” There’s a click and the speakers are silent. Your heart drops and you want to cry so badly. You just spilled your guts and the speakers decide not to work? What kind of fate is this?

You exit the small room and walk into the open space where Yoongi messes with the gears. “What were you saying in there?” he asks, never looking up to look at you as he continues to push buttons and twist knobs.

You open your mouth, the words catching in your mouth. “Nothing,” you finally answer, voice low and quiet.

He hums. “Okay. Well I have work to do so you can leave.”

You can feel the tears prick the corner of your eyes as you give a small nod and turn to leave. Twisting the knob, you open the door and leave his room. You told him how you felt, and although he didn’t hear you, that counts as something right? You confessed and you know the answer. You can go back to your dorm and live your life happily.

Halfway down the hall, you spin on your heels and make your way back towards his room. You burst through the door again. Yoongi, with his hands resting on the table and head down, looks up and meets your gaze. The door closes behind you, again, and you speak, “I love you.” He rises slowly. “That’s what I said.” He’s silent and you’re not sure what to do, so you begin to repeat everything. “I’m in love with you. I’ve been in love with you since we first met–”

“Shut up,” he says, tone gravelly. “What did you say?”

You swallow the lump in your throat as you repeat, “I love you.”

He looks away, eyes looking conflicted for the first time as he runs a hand through his hair. “Dammit,” he mutters before walking over to you with quick strides. You’re scared as he gets closer, and you’re taken aback when he cups your cheeks and crashes his lips to yours.

#bangtanuniversity #bangtanarmynet #thebtswritersclub #btsgoldnet #btswritersguild #bts #bts x reader #bts x you #bts fanfic #bts fluff #bts angst #bts au #min yoongi #yoongi x reader #yoongi x you #yoongi fanfic #yoongi fluff #yoongi angst #yoongi au

193 notes · View notes

rosietaeyongswife · 3 years ago

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i love u so, pls let me go | jaewon

jaewon was sitting in his studio thinking so much, that he didn’t even notice hanbin walking in.

“yo man, what are you thinking about?” no response. “dude?”

“ah, what?” he didn’t pay anttention, and was kind of missing out, what does his frirend said. “sorry, i zooned out.”

“no problem.” he laughed. “i was asking what are you thinking about?”

“i’m kinda..” he was looking for words “kinda sad.”

“why? does something happend? y/n?”

“yeah, her.”

“did you fight or something?”

“no we didn’t. even if there is reason, she wouldn’t bring it up.” he hissed. “i’m sad, because of me.”

“you can tell me, and i can give you advice.” he smiled at him. “no matter what, jaewon i am here.”

“i love her, you know that, she know that, my parents know that, everyone know that.” hanbin nodded. “but i feel bad. i truly love her, but i feel like i’m not enough. she deserves better.”

“what do you mean?”

“i’m always working on something. you know album, new drama or some shoots. it does take a lot of my time, and energy. i see by myself, that i don’t get enough my time to her. i see how she is happy when she see me, but also how sad she is when i need to go.” he was now looking at his foot. “i know that she misses me so much, i heard how she was talking with her friend that she is tired. she would want to have more time with me, and other shit.”

“ah, i understand now. but she never tolds you, that she is mad about it?”

“she didn’t have to.” he smiled a little. “she is tired of this relationship, and she is in it by herself. i can’t be with her, and took everything from her, but not giving enough.”

his words were honest. you weren’t type to say it loud about things that upset you, and jaewon knew it perfectly. he just knew by your actions, that you are hurt.

“so you feel like you are keeping her away on a collar?”

“kinda.”

“i mean.” he stopped. “if that would make you both happy, i feel like you should do it, but think abou it, if you aren’t going to regret it.”

“i am sure.” he wasn’t.

you were staring at your now ex-boyfriend with doubt in his eyes. you couldn’t quite understand what was going on right now. jaewon just walked in, faced you and tell you, that both of you should break up.

“so that’s how it ends.” you hissed. “i thought that you have genuine feelings for me, as i do to you. but..” you were looking now at pictures in frame at the wall “i was wrong. i gave you my all, but now you want to break up. after this time.”

“listen y/n. i love you, i love you so much.” he held your hands, and you were just looking at his hands. “look at me.” you did. “when you love someone you want this person to be happier, you can let go of this person, if this means that it’s going to be better. that’s what i’m doing. don’t you see, that because of my work it’s not working?” he was right. “i’m tired of see you being hurt deep inside, or how many times you were waiting for me. i’m really sad, that i made you upset. that i made you feel like this.”

“but we can still try. i am not complaining!” you lied. “we could get over this. i could be happy at my own, you know. this wasn’t the worst time. i get used to it. if you just want to break up, cause you bored of me, just say it, and don’t lie to my face bastard.”

“i am not lying, y/n. i truly love you, i really do. but i want you to be happier, and i know that right now i can’t be person, who makes you happy.” his voice break down. “i can take away your happines or freedom, just because i am working, and you are waiting. you deserve the best, and i’m taking it away. i love you, but please let me go, as i let go of you. i think you’ll be happier with someone who can be with you.” tear goes down his cheek. he couldn’t believe his words. “i know it’s sounds harsh, but.. we should get over ourselfs.”

“i see.” you said, and let go of his hands. “i don’t see point in it. i was just trying to be by your side no matter what. but it’s okay. if you want me to be happier, then i will. thank you for last two years, and good times. i hope you won’t treat your next girl the same. i hope you’ll understand, that if someone truly loves you, they’ll wait for you.” you turn around. “but now i agree. goodbye, jung jaewon. get your stuff, and get out of my apartament.”

it’s not that good, but i have idea in my head so yeah

#jaewon #jungjaewon #jung jaewon #jaewon au #jungjaewonau #jaewon scenario #jaewon angst #krnb #khipop #krap #krnb au #krnb imagine #krnb icons #korean #korea #south korea #korean person #reader

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weuschoiceheart · 4 years ago

Text

⋘I-Land / Enhypen⋙ Love, I-Land (special chapter)

Tagging: @mari-kigold @akira-star @affectionaterainoflove @enhypenthusiast @periwinkle-ink

Genre: just very nostalgic :))

Word Count: 2k+

Jay knew something was up when he walked into a dead silent Hybe building.

Looking around, he frowned at the emptiness. Am I too early? Too late? Checking his watch, he realized that he was exactly on time. So where is everyone?

Sitting down on the couch, he decided to wait for everyone in the lounge. Perhaps the other members were playing some trick on him, to scare him when he lets his guard down. None of the other Hybe artists were here today, since Bang PD had let everyone take the day off, so the silence felt disorienting.

A beep from Jay’s phone startled him out of his thoughts, and he clicked on the notification.

Location change: go back to where we started. See you at the reunion!

“Go back to where we started…” Jay muttered, a smile spread across his face as he thought back to the old box in the woods.

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“Remember when we first came here?” Youngbin sighed as he, Jimin, and Sungchul walked through the forest. “It seems so long ago.”

“Yeah…” Jimin stretched his arms above his head, pointing at the familiar building coming into view. “And we’re here.”

“It still hasn’t changed,” Sungchul said in awe, watching as the black door slowly flipped open and the three of them walked in. “I can’t wait to see everyone again.”

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“Wow...I can’t believe it’s been a year already,” K traced the sides of the egg gate. “Everything feels older.”

“No, it’s just you getting old,” Kyungmin teased, ducking behind Nicholas before K could smack him. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding.”

“Remember when we waited for you to come back from the dance unit test?” EJ asked. “You guys were so cool performing on stage.”

K smiled, thinking back to the old memories. The feeling of being on stage again, giving all he got to keep from getting eliminated. The cheers from the other boys, the smiles at the camera. He still recalled the nervous feeling of waiting for the results, and most of all, he vividly remembered the moment he, Jungwon, and Sunghoon got back to I-Land and hearing—

“Hello~”

As if on cue, the gate opened to present Enhypen crowding around the entrance, doing the exact same move K had created a year ago. Jaw dropping in shock, he heard the yells from the other boys as they tumbled out the egg and embraced the members they haven’t seen in months. Before he could fully comprehend everything, a wild blur of blonde hair suddenly launched himself onto him and Taki, wrapping his arms around them both.

“Taki! Hyung! You’re back!” K laughed as Niki jumped up and down, bursting with excitement to see his fellow Japanese brothers. Has he grown taller? K wondered, and he felt somehow proud and sad at the same time. Ruffling Niki’s hair, he watched as the younger hugged Taki, almost lifting him off his feet. “Let him breathe, Niki, we’re not going anywhere.”

“You’re finally here.” A familiar voice said, and K turned to see Seon making his way over. Grinning, he trapped K in another hug, and K feels like he’s finally back home.

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“Did you actually framed the shirt?”

“Yes I did, do you want to come over to see it?” Jay boasted, trying to one up Nicholas.

“He actually didn’t, he lost it when we moved into the dorms and this morning he panicked because he couldn’t wear it to the reunion,” Jake said, causing Nicholas to raise his eyebrows at Jay, who gave Jake a look of betrayal.

“You weren’t supposed to tell him that!”

“Well, it’s not like—ahhhhh!”

Before Jake could finish his sentence, a larger body wrapped his arms around him. He could sense the younger boy’s enormous smile before he could hear him. “It’s me, Jakey!”

“Daniel!” Jake tried to struggle out of Daniel’s embrace, though he was too busy laughing. “You almost gave me a heart attack.”

“He’s going around hugging everyone,” Jay explained, “Don’t be surprised if he actually gives you one next time.”

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The ghost watched the boys crowding around the egg gate, a sad smile on his face. It’s been so long since he had any visitors, and seeing them back brought some light in his undead life. Literally. All the lights had been shut off since the boys left, and the ghost had to make his way around in perpetual darkness. Not that he needs any light to see, but it's nice to view the sun, even if it’s just for a little while.

Turning around to look at the practice room he just came out of, the ghost could almost see the past images of the boys practicing there. The Fire team, organizing their formations. The Fake Love team with their hoods and shirts over their heads, trying to practice without laughing. The Flicker team, playing around with the curtains. It’s also the place where Seon first found him, and the first time the ghost ever revealed itself to anyone.

There was the lounge connecting to it, where Niki had played the piano and Heeseung had sung. Where the infamous arm wrestling match had taken place and the boys had played with the video filters on the IPads. Where they had cried and comforted each other, and where Jay had written his heartfelt letters.

Making his way up the staircase that the Grounder boys had also walked up to see I-Land, the ghost drifted along the common room. Here, all of them had sat while playing Truth or Dare, the hoodies spread out and “Made by Jay” was created, where they waited anxiously to perform. If he concentrates just enough, the ghost can almost imagine the I-Land boys filming their PR videos, and sheep Niki making Sunghoon laugh.

There was the dining area, the place where the morning zombies had sat, Sunoo had said “I’m cuter,” where they munched on macaroons and ramen. The ghost can almost see the nine reading letters from their parents, talking and joking around the table. There was the kitchen area, where Sunghoon had screeched about the pork, Hanbin had found the broken banana, and Heeseung had ranted about the ramen. The fridge was empty of spoons, and no one did any side squats to get rid of bloating now.

Moving on to the bedrooms. He had always wondered how K managed to fit his long limbs on the bed, or if he could at all. The mist that Sunoo had sprayed all over his face, and that Jungwon had almost eaten, was gone from the drawer, leaving only the empty reflection of the room in the mirror. The annoying fly that Geonu had tried to catch was gone, the light that Jay had turned off dark (no, the dressing room light does not automatically turn off by itself), all the beds stripped of clothes and necessities. Why Nicholas was sleeping naked would remain a mystery, no more Jay yelling at everyone to wake up and Niki going back to sleep right after.

The washrooms were next. He had to admit, Jungwon’s and Jake’s pranks against Jay worked pretty well, coming from a ghost anyway. There were the sinks lining the wall where K and Taki washed up like father and son, where K and Jay hugged and promised that they’ll debut together, where Jay scolded everyone for leaving their laundry around.

Out of the washroom now, the ghost lingered outside the room that used to contain the stage outfits and BTS phones. The traces of the boys can be felt, thinking back to the selfies and pictures they took together, to when they marveled at the clothes for their very first “Into the I-Land” stage. He peeked into the practice rooms where he can almost see the Pretty U team helping Sunghoon struggle through aegyo, and where the I Need U team played zombies with the eye massager.

Drifting down the stairs again, remembering how Youngbin carried Jungwon down the stairs to the practice when the younger boy was barefooted, the ghost moved on to the stage itself. He recalled every performance here clearly; the nerve-wracking audition stages, the dance and vocal units battle, the incredible “I&credible” stages, the moving “Calling” performance, and the iconic “Dive Into You” stage. Jigeum Buteo saying “Standby,” Jake’s “this hyung is crazy!” and the confused “Rival? Live?” echoed through the ghost’s ears. The memories of it all hit him like a truck (not that he would feel anything if he was hit by a truck, he’s a ghost after all, but you get the simile), causing him to choke up a little. He missed them so much.

Strolling outside now, the ghost walked into Ground, and reminisced some more. Here was where Rain taught them “Fire” and hugged every one of the boys. He could picture Jay giving back massages to Kyungmin, telling him how they must work through the pain to get to I-Land. There was Hanbin comforting Jaebeom (it’s so weird calling him Echan now), and helping the other boys learn the dance. Sunoo and Sungchul practicing “Save Me,” Jaeho practicing with Nicholas and Niki, Taki making faces at the camera. A blurry image of all the boys comparing and measuring their heights, trying to see who’s taller. Really, I-Land seems like a magical paradise, but he would never forget the fun times the Grounders had, and the hard work they put in to achieve their dreams.

Outside once again, he spied the matted grass on the ground and smiled wistfully. It’s strange, he thought, how it was still there after Jungwon filmed his PR video in his sheep costume. He remembered how adorable he was, how all of them were, showing off their personalities to get fans to vote for them. And now it’s getting dark, so the ghost moved on to the small light from a campfire in the distance.

Settling down on the ground, he watched as all the boys talked and joked with each other. They were sitting down in front of the large screen, where the final 11 had watched the fan videos, and pulled the benches around in a circle. Their smiles lit up their faces, their arms tangled in one another, Jimin’s head leaning against Geonu’s, Taeyong holding onto Echan’s hand. The scene filled the ghost with a feeling he can’t describe, and being a ghost with no heart, it was definitely a little strange, feeling something after a long time of emptiness.

“....and I just want to say thank you, to everyone for staying by my side on this journey,” Seon concluded, snapping the ghost out of his daze as the boy sat down. As if reading his thoughts, Seon’s eyes flickered over to where the ghost sat, and smiled.

Thank you for looking after us.

Being a ghost is lonely sometimes, floating in and out of places with no purpose. The smile, that one kind thought, ignited a flame in him. In a world filled with countless people, it’s hard to spot a lone spirit, invisible in a crowd. It’s even harder to make them feel at home, in a place where they’re recognized and wanted. Yet here he is, enveloped in a family who coaxed him out of his shell. No, I should be thanking you, Seon.

Maybe this is what the fans felt, watching them run for their dreams. Every Friday charged with anticipation and excitement, of finding who would get eliminated and who would stay. Away from lives permeated with pain, loneliness, and uncertainty, they found solace within these 23 boys as they followed them on this journey to debut. Along the way, the fans found each other as well, and a community full of eggies and engenes was born.

Thank you for the memories, I-Land.

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A/N: Thank you to all the eggies for welcoming me into this wonderful family. Whether you were a predebut stan or just started stanning Enhypen, thank you for supporting our boys. I-Land is over now, but our journey with the boys will live on.

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