#why do you have to exist
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I haven't drawn in three days and when I finally get the chance I remember I have art block and hate everything I draw.
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "đđźđđźâ" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) âwhy didn't he use đŤľđź?â didn't exist yet. âwhy didn't he use đ?â dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. đđź is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent đđźđđź as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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You don't wish your disability was worse or more visible, you wish your disability was taken seriously. Please stop confusing the two, I guarantee you would not get the support you need JUST by being more severe or more visible. Please listen to visibly disabled people when we tell you it isn't better on our side
#m/cc#mine#I tried extremely hard to word this nicely because I KNOW people don't mean bad and often even know there are unique challenges#and believe me I know the challenges of invisible disability too!!#I have invisible disabilities!#but as someone who has also been at least visibly 'off' since they were 10 I am SO SICK of invisible disabilities being hailed as like#a unique extra oppression that us lucky visibly disabled people don't have to deal with#there are challenges to invisible disabilities that visibly disabled people DON'T have to deal with!#but you need to understand that *the reverse is also true*#there are MASSIVE benefits to being able to lie about your disability for example#or not dealing with the overt ableism that comes with your disability being obvious to everyone#*I do not have the option to pretend I'm not disabled.* that is never an option I have#I walk weirdly. I use a mobility aid now. my speech and face are 'off.' I lean to one side#for a long time I wore sunglasses 24/7 and often didn't make sense. I sometimes can't speak or won't react to others#for the most part people will always know that at the very least something is wrong with me#and more obviously I have people telling me they'll pray for me; telling me I can't do things I'm already in the process of doing;#wanting to shake my hand to tell me I'm an inspiration for not killing myself; giving me dirty looks for existing in public#and yes. I'm aware that this is very much an in-community issue. I know the average abled person doesn't know invisible disabilities exist#that's why there's so much awareness happening for it#but as a visibly disabled person I get SO TIRED of constantly hearing 'I wish my disability was visible :'('#it's just 'I wish I had your disability!' but from other disabled people
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Danny Is An Alternate Version Of Ra's Al Ghul And Flash Already Called Dibs On Adopting Him
Danny In All His Sleep Deprived Slightly Scuffed Up From A Fight Glory Is On His Way To Clockworks Tower To Hopefully Get A Nap And Maybe Some Homework Done When A Natural Portal Opens Up In Front Of Him And Proceeds To Unceremoniously Drop Him In The DC Verse Just Outside Of Central City Before Promptly Closing Leaving A Tired Danny Behind In A Run Down Abandoned Parking Lot.
It's Times Like This When Danny Regrets Putting Off Learning How To Make His Own Portals, Cause Now He Is Very Much Stuck For The Foreseeable Future And He Has No Idea Where Or When He Is. Luckily For Him However Central City Isn't Too Far Away, Unlucky For Him However Is That Once In The City He Realizes This Isn't His Dimension. He's Pretty Sure He'd Remember Something Called The Justice League.
So What Do You Do When Supernatural Bullshit Fails You? You Fall Back On Your Mad Scientist Roots And You Make A Portal Gun. So That's Exactly What Danny Plans To Do.
Unfortunately Staying Alive And Building Questionably Safe Portal Technology Requires Money And Supplies, So He Ends Up Wandering From City To City Doing Odd Jobs/Fixing Up Busted Tech For Cash Or Unwanted Electronics For His "Operation: Get Home" Needs. This Obviously Ends In A Few Superhero Encounter Shenanigans.
Though He Always Ends Up Back Near Central City, Both On The Off Chance The Natural Portal Will Open Up Again And Because Out Of All The Superheroes That Apparently Exist In This Universe The Speedsters Are His Favorite (Red Robin Is Solidly His Second Favorite Ever Since The Gotham Vigilante Gave Him A Large Coffee Filled With Enough Caffeine To Kill A Man).
Unbeknownst To Danny However Is That Every Hero/Vigilante He Has Encountered Has Come To At Least One Of The Following Conclusions; 1. Run Away Meta Who Is In Desperate Need Of A Good Meal/Adoption Bait. 2. Possibly Red Robin/Tim Drake Clone 3. A Good Kid But Could Possibly Be A Future Rouge If Left Unsupervised. 4. Did Bats Get A New Kid And Why Is He Here?
All Flash Knows Is That He Saw The Kid First And Therefore Has Dibs. Suck It Bruce.
Fast-forward A Few Months And Danny Gets Hurt During A Rogue Attack While Trying To Help Some Civilians Get To Safety (Old Hero Habits Die Hard (Ha Die Hard) And All That Jazz) And He Nopes Out Once Everyone Is Safe And When The Paramedics Are Busy With Other People Unaware He Left A Blood Sample Behind.
One DNA Test Brought To You By Paranoid Bat Concerns Of A Possible Red Robin Clone Later And They Find Out That Dannys DNA Matches One Ra's Al Ghul.
They Now Think Danny Is An Escaped Ra's Al Ghul Clone.
Memes For The Vibes:
#captain's posts#this has been haunting me#the flash/any of the speedsters:*exist*#danny:*can feel the speedforce on them* i like your vibe funny man#basically danny is actually an alternate version of Ra's Al Ghul and gets chucked into the dc vesrse#because natural portals are bitches hijinks ensue#and while i do love batfam adopting danny i think its very funny for flash to just yoink him while the big bad bat isn't looking#i desperately need him and tim to be besties tho specifically before they find out danny is an alternate Ra's Al Ghul#danny:*sitting in a park and tinkering with some circuitry* oh hey flash :)#flash: hey kid! great news i might be adopting a kid soon!#danny: oh really? thats cool-#flash:*holding out adoption papers and doing his best puppy eyes* its you. sign here.#danny:*vague memory of clockwork complaining about speedster pops into his mind* hmmm#danny:*deciding to be a little shit cause what else do you do when you're almost a year into being stuck in an alternate dimension* >=)#danny: sure why not? soooo full name or what?#flash:*didn't expect to get this far* uh-#i also really like danny being clockworks apprentice/time line clean upper so danny just remembers cw bitchin about the speedsters#also cause im a sucker for tim x danny...#tim:*having a crisis cause the cute meta kid he befriended/has a crush on may or may not be a vlone of Ra's Al Ghul* aaaaasaaaaaaaasaaaaaaa#dick: you okay buddy?#tim:*aggressively points at the dna match of danny to Ra's Al Ghul on the bat computer* AAAAAAAAAAAAAA#dick: Oh-#dc x dp#dp x dc#dp x dc crossover#dp x dc prompt#dpxdc
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struggling to understand how people can act THIS shocked whenever another TME theorist/activist (especially a cis 70s feminist) gets revealed as having written super transmisogynistic texts and palled around with TERFs. surely this cannot come as this much of a surprise. people are so incredibly reluctant to question the politics of the Established Feminist theorists. maybe someday having been "kink critical" and talking about the Unique Oppression of (cis) Lesbians and repeatedly drawn trans woman and lesbian as two separate categories and having attended fucking michfest will be enough for people to realize that without acting so surprised like come on now.
#âbut THIS theorist-â her too. we had to do this for bechdel for feinberg now those posts are going around about#bell hooks' transmisogyny - why are you still looking for#your previous tme trans woman friendly radfem adjacent theorist. I promise they do not exist.#having once said âtrans women are allowed in women's spaces just like Real Women!âdoes not change that.#trans#mine#ok to reblog#*precious not previous lol
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why is it "this is what happens when you tell white boys they're devils :(" when it comes to the white male alt right pipeline but no one calls for empathy for uneducated right wing white women. what about the high school girl to isolated stay at home mom pipeline. where is their loneliness epidemic
#how come i never see ''this is what happens when you tell white girls they exist to give white men sons :(''#it's ''how do we reach today's young white men :(('' but no one has tips for reaching right wing women#why is that i wonder#i feel deeply betrayed by female class traitors and have done my best to understand why they are the way they are#but they're a lost cause and white men aren't because women are not complex human beings#and men are just so sensitive you don't understand
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Prompt:
Jason keeps accidentally drawing parallels between his running away to Ethiopia and getting killed.
He leaves a note saying heâll be back soon? Three terrified bats AND a supe crashing through the roof of a 7/11.
Casually mentioning heâll be going overseas to check up on a lead? Surprise! Nightwingâs going the same way! What a coincidence!
Jason pushes someone off the roof? âDonât worry Jaylad, I know it was an accident!!!!â
The next gig takes place at an abandoned warehouse? âExplosives whomst?? No, Jason, of course I didnât scout the area beforehand. Donât be absurd. Your bombs?? Oh, those were yours?â
Look, itâs not that Jason doesnât appreciate a demonstration of how much they care. But heâs getting seriously fed up with the level of overprotectiveness everyoneâs displaying.
Although, in retrospect, he could have handled this whole thing better than having an open spat with Bruce and then disappearing on them for two months straight. Oops.
(In his defense, Kori got them cards for a once-in-life-time-space-opera.)
#prompt#still stuck in the hospital and I need something to giggle at rn#and whatâs better for it than some batfam crack#Jason did not think that last one through#that stunt was not worth Bruce having a genuine and full blown meltdown#also can someone please explain why everyoneâs got contingency plans for Nightwing on display?#what do you mean you havenât slept for a week Tim?#WGAT DO YOU MEAN YOURâRE LEGALLY A ROGUE NOW!?#Kori I need you to extend our space trip-#Kori: hell no youâre on your own bye#Kori: Roy get Biz and then weâre outta here#Kori: weâll check back next year if earth still exists#Alfred: ⌠I take it I can store the guns back in their appropriate places?#Jason: ????????????????#jason todd#batfamily#dick grayson#bruce wayne#batfam#robin#tim drake#red hood#unhinged family#protective#I snuck a teeny tiny amount of implied superbat in here#because Clark has adopted all the bat children sorry I donât make the rules
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Every day i read a post where people write that âBruce Wayne has an adoption problemâ or that Danny is adoption bait on the first second of seeing him, not even knowing if he has a want of vengeance and a sad backstory and parallels to Bruce, and every day I want to softly cry in a corner.
#guys I fucking beg of you. do you know how common black hair blue eye people are in comics#Danny isnât unique#bones rants#bones speaks#Bruce would first try to help Danny. thereâs no way heâd instantly go into adoption if he just sees Danny exist in a strange place#make there be DRAMA make there be INTRIGUE#instead of âoh adoption bait :3â make there a dramatic ass reason why heâs taken under Bruceâs wing#I see a lot of these but still thereâs so many âoh u look like my kids guess youâre mine nowâ#and like what. guys. where is the Danny being a Ward and not adopted#let Bruce see Dannyâs parents die in front of Danny and have him instantly connect with Danny over a similar familial death#or have Tim take him under his wing bc Danny is stalking the Bats trying to see if the man will try to convince him to leave Gotham#anything.#bones high ass rants
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do the silly thing. if you do not do the silly thing time will pass and it will not be the same silly thing it could have been. it will still be silly, and it will still be yours, but it will not be the same. this is both a blessing and a curse, but so is living; and if you do not do it now when will you? who will? it has to be you, it was always meant for you, waiting for you.
#this is about writing for me but could be about anything (that is not hurtful to urself or others. very important)#that's why it is silly (affectionate) or cringey (affectionate) like u gotta just let yourself go sometimes. you have to do the thing.#even if it is terrible horrible (not what you want) bc at least then it EXISTS. at least it holds space in the universe and it lives outsid#you can let it sit and rot and gather dust but at least then you can go back to it. even if it's horrible there is at LEAST at least -#one kernel of it that you can bring into the next piece. at least one shining pearl of something.#even if it needs work or months in those lil funky rock tumblers for geodes and gemstones and all. even if needs SO much work.#at least it is there!!! and it is yours!!!#it's your call to action if it's something u want w/ all your heart.#or even a piece of it. if it's something you want? well - it's already yours. it always has been.#you just have to take the first step / the first breath / and begin.#scribbles.
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NEW FEAR OF YOU CONTENT AHH
Not even written by me! @dahvampire wrote an entire fanfiction for Fear of you, check it out!! <3
Pretty much this dynamic:
#WOOPS wrong blog LMAO#omg i'm so happy#THIS#AHHHHHHHH#I'm so freaking blessed; they writing about my blorbos#HELLOO#LOOKIT THE FREAKING PROSE#@dahvampire I will leave THE review to ever exist prepare your inbox#I'm so freaking crazy about this#Like THE GRIN I have on my face HELLO#I haven't read âAll Inâ yet (only the first paragraphs with OH BOY DO I LOVE THIS ALREADY) I want to save it for my travel home today!!#Man why did I stop writing about them i love this fucking bird#I think I'm back in the fandom baby#HIUWE>itrfsda#I need to finish editing the next chapter of Foy#It's Endeavor and Shinyo centric too#Let's see how it goes weeee#bnha#mha#mha foy#bnha fear of you#mha fear of you#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#mha shinyo takami#bnha shinyo takami#mha the takami thief#bnha shinyo#bnha oc#mha endeavor
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Loveless folks: *exist*
Folks who do love: So youâre inherently evil. So youâre inhuman. So youâre doomed to be sad and miserable. So youâre inherently abusive. So youâre lying and Iâll prove that you actually love something. So youâre broken. So youâre bullying people who want to be happy. So you donât care about other people. So you shouldnât be allowed around other people. So youâre inherently a self-centered asshole.
Loveless folks:⌠Are yâall sure love makes you âgoodâ and âhappyâ people?
#Loveless#loveless aro#do we have a word for non-loveless folks?#because Iâve been using âlovefulâ in my head#honestly I worry about them sometimes#they have a tendency to become defensive and hostile when you bring up the fact that loveless folks exist#like yâall why do you see me not experiencing love as a threat to you experiencing love?
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Itâs very funny to read posts about Taylor (especially on SB) and slowly realize that the person does not actually remember who Taylor is, but rather replaced her with a super sanitized CW version of her.
Theyâd be like, âTaylor is understanding of peopleâs life choices and is a tough but fair leaderâ.
She is absolutely not any of those things.
Sheâs judgmental as hell and sort of a huge asshole to people who donât immediately listen to her. Hell, Tattletale straight up repeats Miss Militias speech about how Taylor is manipulative in how she forces people to help her by making it so they donât have any other choice (but is much nicer about it).
Even when TT tries to reason with her before this, point out that the people opposing them have valid points (which is weird to type), Taylor chooses to leave the scene instead of confronting the situation (much like how she left Danny when he finally confronted her).
When Cuff rightfully yells at her for lying about them (specifically her) being shot at, Taylor brushes her off completely. Cuff then has another moment of disbelief years later when she has to painfully explain to Taylor why mind controlling people into making out with each other is super rapey.
Taylor is not smart in terms of common sense or understanding peopleâs views. Sheâs not unbiased or fair.
Sheâs literally that meme of âone day Iâll wear this boot!â and she succeeds. She succeeds so hard that society is traumatized from it!
Thatâs what makes Taylor such a great character. That sheâs so complex that even when you know sheâs doing bad, outright evil things, she is enjoyable to a reader. The fact that she fails at being a hero so badly, fails at being a broadly good person, but still tries in her own fucked up way is peak entertainment and empathetic in the same way that Bojack Horseman can be celebrated as interacting with the audience heart.
Especially because it makes those moments of genuine heroics shine all the more. Itâs her running across the city trying to warn everyone! Her trying to save Chubster! Her trying to save Glory Girl!
Dont sanitize who Taylor is!
Let her be that fucked up gremlin who sometimes does good things in a storm of bad!
#spacebattles Taylor why do you exist#CW Taylor would not have smacked Vista with a baton#parahumans#wildbow#worm#wormblr#worm web serial#taylor hebert#skitter#weaver#khepri
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Hello I love your art!!! I was reading through your changeling au and Felix mentions that fae are creatures of mirth. They literally need attention to survive. But what kind of attention? I guess I'm wondering because Adrien has been in the public eye for a while now, but has been personally neglected for even longer. What does that mean for him? Is he starving? Is he in danger of dying? Does he even know it? (I assume not given he doesn't even know he's Fae).
If he is starving / in danger of starving who is the first to realize this?
it depends on the mirth, on the attention, on what it is they seek. Without making things too complicated - I don't like to define everything into neat little boxes after all, there's fun in nuance - Felix is just explaining from his experience, the Fae he was with tended to be "entertained" by certain aspects of their playing, which was the mirth that kept them relevant. Relevancy more than anything is really what keeps their wheels greased.
In Adrien's case though, the reason he's cloying for so many names and to have so many thralls and attendants is because he SHOULD be a more social creature and has been kept woefully alone. He is kinda starving in the way a fae starves - he's relevant, but only in an image his father constructs OF him, which means it isn't REALLY him - and he has no one to play with. No friends, no lovers, and no rivals, makes a very sad fae
#replies#did this make sense ? I have very specific lore in my brain for how this shit works#and it can be sort of confusing to parse#starving doesn't work the same for fae as it does for people#being creatures of mirth#its why they like sweet foods generally. they dont eat it to eat#they eat it to taste something sweet#they take people's names to have people to play with#to feed their desire for entertainment and relevancy#how do i put this another way... anyone in the crowd have adhd? or the tisms? you know hyperfixations#like REAL hyperfixations. not just âI'm interested in thisâ#I mean âI am legitimately unable to focus on anything BUT this one thingâ#âI have made this thing apart of my personality and I need it to survive and I know everything about it and I NEED to talk to someone itâ#imagine you exist. but you're the hyperfixation#and you exist... MORE. in a real way. when people focus on you. some aspect of you#want to mimic you or are apart of you or are owned by you. now youre more real.#like that.
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Bringing this back bc I think we as a society moved on too fast
#byler#sitting in silence and thoughtfully listening to the person you're in love with blabbering on and just sitting there like#LET ME PHOTOGRAPH YOU IN THIS LIGHT#you could easily make the argument byler is endgame based solely on the number of parallels they have over the seasons#why is there so much dedication and intricate planning put into scenes for them?#why do i have to have almost every scene have at least one frame by frame callback to another scene with them? like??#literally more parallels and callbacks than all the existing romantic pairings combined...#and the parallels are always deep and pointing to it being requited...#friends?#it's not that deep?#except with byler it always is
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âRegulus would be proud of us,â James whispered quietly to no one in particular, still gripping onto the painting like a life raft.Â
â Tender Curiosities, Baby! @otrtbs
#tender curiosities baby#art heist baby#james potter fanart#james potter#jegulus#rosekiller#rosekiller fanart#marauders#marauders fanart#evan rosier#barty crouch jr#jegulus fanart#jegulus fanfiction#fic: ahb#art heist baby!#mine#my art#hp#ahb#ive thought about this scene for so long it just took me forever to draw cause once again the anatomy of cars is the bane of my existence#like originally i wanted evan and barty holding hands to be visible to have the contrast of sad lonely james and sad not lonely rosekiller#but alas cars wont allow it#ahb just still has my entire heart you dont get it#i have a none blurry rosekiller and a just james in front of blue with stars version of this but i think ill only put them on insta...#(sneaky end notes: i do have to admit i am not too pleased with evan and barty but this was my first time drawing them)#(so i couldnt figure it out quite yet hency why they look a little. less efforty...)#(also the snake ring is the same design that i drew for chapter 34 of ahb in my little chapter illustrations for my typeset)#((nvm i just checked back and i am fully lying here i used a different one for my typeset and now im vaguely upset oops)#(i shouldnt make decisions only half awake im going to think about this for too long now i am sad))#((like suddenly i was like. hold up. i had a different design there didnt i... it was an open ring goddamnit))
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the rise of AI art isn't surprising to us. for our entire lives, the attitude towards our skills has always been - that's not a real thing. it has been consistently, repeatedly devalued.
people treat art - all forms of it - as if it could exist by accident, by rote. they don't understand how much art is in the world. someone designed your home. someone designed the sign inside of your local grocery store. when you quote a character or line from something in media, that's a line a real person wrote.
"i could do that." sure, but you didn't. there's this joke where a plumber comes over to a house and twists a single knob. charges the guy 10k. the guy, furious, asks how the hell the bill is so high. the plumber says - "turning the knob was a dollar. the knowledge is the rest of the money."
the trouble is that nobody believes artists have knowledge. that we actively study. that we work hard, beyond doing our scales and occasionally writing a poem. the trouble is that unless you are already framed in a museum or have a book on a shelf or some kind of product, you aren't really an artist. hell, because of where i post my work, i'll never be considered a poet.
the thing that makes you an artist is choice. the thing that makes all art is choice. AI art is the fetid belief that art is instead an equation. that it must answer a specific question. Even with machine learning, AI cannot make a choice the way we can - because the choices we make have always been personal, complicated. our skills cannot be confined to "prompt and execution." what we are "solving" isn't just a system of numbers - it is how we process our entire existence. it isn't just "2 and 2 is 4", it's staring hard at the numbers and making the four into an alligator. it's rearranging the letters to say ow and it is the ugly drawing we make in the margin.
at some point, you will be able to write something by feeding my work into a machine. it will be perfectly legible and even might sound like me. but a machine doesn't understand why i do these things. it can be taught preferences, habits, statistical probability. it doesn't know why certain vowels sound good to me. it doesn't know the private rules i keep. it doesn't know how to keep evolving.
"but i want something to exist that doesn't exist yet." great. i'm glad you feel creative. go ahead and pay a fucking artist for it.
this is all saying something we all already knew. the sad fucking truth: we have to die to remind you. only when we're gone do we suddenly finally fucking mean something to you. artists are not replicable. we each genuinely have a skill, talent, and process that makes us unique. and there's actual quiet power in everything we do.
#also pay plumbers more. and electricians. and other devalued occupations#idk that this makes sense#but im like#people being so fucking pleased with themselves about the fact they can ''fake'' art#n im like#sure#but what if we stop making things for you huh#what if we stop giving u this stuff anymore#what happens to ur ai art? does it keep growing? does it keep making choices?#why do u need to see us as machines?#''i want X to exist but i don't have the skill to do it''#okay spend literally years of your life studying#''i don't want to do that''#okay pay someone who DID do that#''no i don't think it's a real skill''#okay so. YOU can't do it. and a LOT of people can't do it. but you think WE should be able to?#FOR FREE?#either it has value or it dont baby make up ur OWN mind#btw studying here is not used academically. i think if ur like. constantly knitting.#thats studying#do u spend hours reading and find urself taking notes and learning about writing#ur studying#do you follow other artists and spend a lot of your time trying new things (even unsuccessfully)#that's also studying#etc#was weird to write this thing about choices and then be like. wait why DO i like that
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