#why did I think Fred was the nice and empathetic one?

[vawobefanart]

Me: *writing Draco x Weasley Twins smut* Also me, in the middle of writing said smut: hmmmmm? *googling what’s the difference between Fred and George* OOOOOH! *completly reversing Fred and George’s roles*

[jamilelucato]

If I Could Tell Her [G.W.]

Pairing: George Weasley x Slytherin!Diggory!reader

Summary: Based on the song If I Could Tell her from the musical Dear Evan Hansen; Cedric’s younger sister mourners her brother and George tries to comfort her.

Musical Hogwarts || Hogwarts Masterlist

A/N: It’s a sad fluffy fic that I can promise will have a part 2 and a 3! it’s all planned out — it depends on how many people will want it.

Words: 1.900+

whole series here

*gif not mine

You were standing next to the monument some Hufflepuffs had put on for your brother. Your seventh year at Hogwarts had only just begun, but you felt like you should be already home.

Cedric Diggory Forever a hero; forever missed.

The writing made sense — your brother was the hero type, probably why he died defending Harry Potter. Some students had left some flowers around the marble plate, appearing to be a tombstone, which made no sense, since he was buried next to your house back at Ottery St Catchpole in Devon, England.

It was weird missing Cedric because you two had never been close. He was one year older, but that was not the reason — when you finally came to Hogwarts, you got sorted to Slytherin, which only proved how much different Cedric and you were. Total opposites. Besides, he was the family’s favourite, the family’s golden boy. You were just the other one.

“He thought you were awesome,” you heard a voice say from behind.

It kinda scared you, but thankfully, you didn’t jump. You turned around; George Weasley starred down at the fake tombstone as if he was reading it and not talking to you.

George was a beautiful boy you knew since a baby. He and his family lived in the same region as you, so more times than often, you two had to sit through dinners together, but there was no more to it.

From all the seven children that Mr and Mrs Weasley had, the closest to you was Ginny, who generally visited you when back at home. But, during school times, many of them just ignored you.

They were, after all, perfect Gryffindors who had a reputation to protect.

So, yeah, having George talking to you while next to the tribute to your brother was rather odd.

He finally looked at you.

“He thought I was awesome? My brother?” you asked, unable to say anything else. The Weasley boys were closer to Cedric then you — they shared such a passion for Quidditch that, although you also played the sport, your passion could never be compared — but it was weird that Cedric could’ve mentioned you to any of them.

“Definitely!” George affirmed, enthusiastically. Something about you being sceptical made him wonder that maybe you and your brother weren’t that close.

“How?”

“Well...” George coughed, trying to get some extra time to think about what to say. You were right about being suspicious — Cedric had never mentioned you to George or his older brothers.

That didn’t mean, however, that he didn’t know unique things about you.

In fact, George paid attention to you every time he could. Something about your voice, your hair, your eyes... he couldn’t point out exactly what but you always got his attention.

As a kid, he thought that maybe at Hogwarts, you two would be close — but then you got into Slytherin, and later on, you became a beater. The same position as him, yes, but you couldn’t be farther to him than before.

He saw that you were still waiting for him to explain what Cedric thought about his little sister. He gulped.

“He said there’s nothing like your smile — sort of subtle and perfect and real,” George said, his voice a bit shaky. You seemed not to notice; focusing on the new information, George could be spitting on you that you wouldn’t care. “He said you never knew how wonderful that smile could make someone feel.”

It was nice listening to Goerge talk. He had a calm voice, way different from his brothers. Even Fred, who was his twin, had a different tone — always loud, never gentle. George seemed to be the most patient of the family — probably because he lives in the shadows of six siblings.

You knew how hard could be living under someone shadows — you loved Cedric, you missed Cedric, but even now that he was gone, his shadow was still there over you.

“And he knew,” George continued, soaking in the sudden courage, “whenever you get bored, you scribble stars on the cuffs of your jeans.”

With wide eyes, you gaped at him. You didn’t think someone could’ve noticed that.

“And he noticed that you still fill out the quizzes that they put in those teen magazines,” when George mentioned that old habit of yours, you almost laughed.

George knew about the magazines because of many dinner nights at the Diggorys when he had to fetch Ginny from y/N’s room. He thought it was a cute habit of yours.

“But he kept it all inside his head,” he added, noticing you were about to ask why Cedric never said those things. “What he saw he left unsaid.”

You looked away from the red-haired’s empathetic face and stared for the last time at the tribute. You needed to put an end to it— you had already grieved over the summer, and you did not want to turn into your parents who appeared unable to get over it.

“And though he wanted to, he couldn’t talk to you; he couldn’t find the way,” George went on. His gesture made you emotional — none of Cedric’s friends seemed so committed to showing you how great your brother was. “But he would always say ‘if I could tell her everything I see’.”

George was rambling and he knew it. There was a reason why he avoided talking to you — you made him nervous. And right at that moment, he was almost passing out. You were interested, and he was lying to your face. Cedric didn’t talk much to him or Fred — he preferred Percy — but even so, George doubted he could’ve mentioned y/N.

“‘If I could tell her how she’s everything to me’,” George sighed. He should stop rambling and free you from him. “‘But we’re a million worlds apart, and I don’t know how I would even start’.”

That new information you had just heard filled your heart with hope. Perhaps Cedric did like you. Perhaps he tried to be closer, but he just didn’t know how to. It wasn’t like you made it easy — you avoided him at all costs.

“Did he say anything else?” you asked, with hope in your eyes.

George raised his brows, “A—about you?”

Oh, that was it. Cedric talked about you but not that much. What were you thinking? That he spend whole afternoons with the Weasleys telling them how much special his sister was?

You started walking away from the fake tombstone, leaving George behind. “Never mind, I don’t really care anyways—”

“No, no, no—just, no, no—he said—” George gulped; he needed to organize his thoughts and fast. “He said so many things; I’m just—I’m trying to remember the best ones. So, um—”

You slowed down, letting George follow you around the school.

The tribute was just a walk away from the Courtyard; a couple more steps and you’d be hearing the students.

“He thought you looked really pretty, er—” George stopped right away. What was he thinking?? Brothers don’t say their sisters are pretty! “It looked pretty cool when you put indigo streaks in your hair,” he corrected himself, hoping you wouldn’t have noticed.

That caught you by surprise, making you stop at your tracks. Those indigo streaks were horrible! It was a blessing you did it in the summer, so it had time to dye out in time for school. But if Cedric thought they were cool...

“He did?”

George smiled. So you didn’t notice him reformulating the phrase.

He was losing you again — you fastened your steps. He started thinking what to say next and then he remembered when he saw you at the Yule Ball with Blaise Zabini.

“And he wondered how you learned to dance like all the rest of the world isn’t there,” he said, staring at you just so he could see you blush. And you did. “But he kept it all inside his head; what he saw he left unsaid.”

“I should’ve...” you gulped, “I should’ve said something.”

George pulled his brows together. “If he could tell you... I’m sure he wanted to.”

You tilted your head, unconsciously, and kept walking. You couldn’t turn back time. It was your fault, and you knew. Merlin, probably even George knew it by now.

“You were everything to him,” Goerge stopped you, holding your pulse. You looked down at his touch — it felt like being electrocuted.

Not by lightning because that would’ve hurt but like touching something you shouldn’t. It was different but welcomed.

“But we’re a million worlds apart,” you sighed when George finally let go of you.

You didn’t want to look at him. He was gentle, patient, but he didn’t understand. He and his family were together all the time; they were close, they were friends. You and Cedric were never like that.

Besides, George said it himself — Cedric wanted to be close. But you, you never wanted Cedric’s “pity”.

“He wondered...” George went on. It was enjoyable talking to you, even if it was about something so morbid. You two used to talk as kids and George had forgotten how delightful it was. “But what do you do when there’s this great divide?”

George reached for his mouth, covering it with his hand. What was he doing? That was too much. He had already pointed out things about you that Cedric probably never knew, but now he wasn’t even trying to pretend those were Cedric’s words.

Thankfully, you weren’t looking. Your eyes wandered at the group of Hufflepuffs standing next to a pillar. If you didn’t overthink it, you could still see Cedric there.

“He just seemed so far away,” you muttered.

“And what do you do when the distance is too wide?” George had accepted he was screwed — he was only waiting for you to be mad at him.

“It’s like I don’t know anything,” you said, waving your hand in  Cho’s direction, who was passing by with some books close to her chest. She waved back, with a weak smile. You knew she was in pain too, but it was ironic because, before your brother died, you had no idea they were dating. Being honest, you didn’t even know who she was— shame on you for that.

“And how do you say ‘I love you’?”

George panicked when you turned your head at him. He had crossed the line, and you knew it.

Except you didn’t. You looked at George with a sad smile, thinking George was right. Even though you gave your brother the cold shoulder, he still loved you. He died loving you.

“But we were a million worlds apart, and I didn’t know how I could’ve even started,” you sighed. “I wish I could tell Cedric I love him too.”

George gave you a sad smile. “ He knows.”

You reached for George’s hand and squeezed it lightly.

“Thank you, George,” you said. “This talk... I didn’t know I needed it, but thank you.”

George blushed and didn’t have time to react when you got on tiptoes — Merlin, do the Weasleys’ kids ever stop growing?— and kissed his cheek. If he wasn’t red before, he sure was now.

“See you around, George.”

He watched you walking away, still unable to react with what just happened.

Fred reached his twin sneakily.

“Lost her again, huh?”

George finally moved, staring at his twin. “I can’t say it now.”

“Yeah, I know,” Fred pressed his lips together. “But don’t take this as an excuse. Take your time, but please, hit on her.”

George rolled his eyes — his twin was never the romantic gentleman.

“Or I will,” Fred added, trying to provoke his brother. It worked — George punched him in the arm.

“I’d like to see you try,” George said with a smirk and walked away.

[loki-is-my-god-of-mischief]

Miss Popular (Marauder Era x Female!Reader)

A/N:  So this is the prologue to my series Miss Popular. The next chapters will be the choice endings.

Endings; Bellatrix Lucius ???: Not Complete ???: Not Complete ???: Not Complete ???: Not Complete ???: Not Complete ???: Not Complete ???: Not Complete ???: Not Complete Special Chapters Tom Riddle Fred & George Salazar Slytherin The '???' will only change when the chapter is complete, to possibly hold suspense

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Hogwarts. A name all magical folk are familiar with. But every generation of magical children that walk through those doors always leave with a different story. This story is set in the year 1975. During this time there was an individual, the most popular person to ever cross through those doors in a long time. This student was a Slytherin, which makes the amount of popularity quite surprising, but she was very charming and quite sweet. Though you wouldn't want to get on her bad side, she is quite fierce when needed to be. This student is (Y/N) (Y/Last Name). This student is you.

________________________________________________________________ Slytherin Dorm (Y/N) woke up before her roommates as always and decided to take a quick shower before her best friend woke up. She entered the bathroom with a towel and spare clothes. After her shower she tried to find the clothes she put on a chair next to her shower but they weren't there. She looked around the room until she felt breath hit the back of her neck. She froze. Her wand was with her clothes so that won't help. Looking up at the mirror to catch a glimpse at who was behind her, she saw wild, curly black hair. "Bella! You scared the life out of me!" (Y/N) screamed as she spun and saw her best friend Bellatrix Black holding her clothes and wand trying so hard not to laugh. Failing miserably I might add. "Give me back my clothes!" "You should have seen your face, priceless." "Only you would get off scaring me. Clothes. Now!" Bellatrix threw the clothes at (Y/N) before proceeding to take her own shower, cackling all the while. "Wasn't that funny" (Y/N) mumbled with a small smile gracing her features. As she heads back into the room she realises her and Bellatrix aren't the only ones awake. "Hey Lucinda" "Oh hey (Y/N). You thought about my proposition?" "I have and the answer is still the same. I can't rejoin the quidditch team this year, I have to focus on my studies. My parents hate the fact I joined quidditch in my second year so I made a deal, this year full study then I can rejoin next year." "That's a shame, your our best seeker. Definitely give that Potter a run for his money." She says with a wink. "Haha, yeah. Sorry though Luce." "Nah, it's fine. You'll have a spot next year though." Lucinda Talkalot says as she heads to the door. "Thanks Luce and good luck in the match tomorrow. I will be in the stands cheering." I say as she leaves the room. "I'll be in the stands cheering" I hear a sickly sweet voice say mockingly behind me. "Ugh, could you be any further up her arse." Bellatrix cackles as I turn round. "Shut up! I've got to make sure I keep my seeker position for next year!" "Yeah I know. Come on, lets go down and meet Cissa before we head to class." Bellatrix says as she heads to the door leading down to the common room (Y/N) following close behind.

________________________________________________________________ Slytherin Common Room As Bellatrix and (Y/N) entered the common room, they spotted Narcissa Black already waiting for them on one of the couches. "About time you two showed up. I've been waiting for about an hour." Narcissa complained the moment they reached her. "Not my fault, Bella stole my clothes." (Y/N) explained. "The opportunity was too perfect to pass up." Bellatrix stated, shrugging nonchalantly. "Oh Merlin, he's doing it again." Narcissa stated whilst looking over (Y/N) shoulder. "Whose doing what?" (Y/N) says as she turns around. What she sees is Lucius Malfoy staring right at her before looking away when he realised he had been caught. "He's staring at you again (Y/N), jeez what a stalker!" Bellatrix stated irritably. "It's nothing serious, come on. Let's get to class before we are late. We have DADA and I don't want to get detention with Filch again." (Y/N) stated whilst glaring at Bellatrix. "What? I said sorry!" but Bellatrix went ignored as Narcissa and (Y/N) left, leaving her to run after them.

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DADA Classroom Fortunately, the three witches managed to make it to lesson on time. The only problem was, they noticed names paired up on the board and knew that they had assigned partners. Bellatrix and Narcissa were lucky enough to be paired together but (Y/N) wasn't as lucky. (Y/N) was paired with Lucius Malfoy. Don't get the wrong idea, (Y/N) was actually friends with Lucius but the staring was becoming teasing material for the Blacks. (Y/N) made her way over to her original seat whilst waiting for Lucius to join her. She didn't have to wait long as he arrived moments later. "Hello Lucius." "Hello (Y/N)" Lucius replied with a small smile. They couldn't say more as at that moment, the teacher walked in. "Anyone who walks into my class from this moment on will have detention with Mr. Filch. As for the rest of you, if you are not with your assigned partners then I suggest you do so now. I have no time for dawdlers and slackers in my class. Now, we will be continuing on from our last lesson of the Patronus Charm but this time the practical instead of the theory. You will work in your pairs to-" The professor was interrupted by Sirius Black and James Potter bursting into the class looking quite out of breathe. "Ah, Mr. Black and Mr. Potter, so nice of you to join us. Class started five minutes ago, I don't care for your excuses please just take your seats." James and Sirius looked at each other and took their seats as they were each others designated partner. They looked quite relieved when they were seated. "Oh and Potter, Black?" They looking at their teacher expectantly. "Detention with Mr. Filch after classes." He said simply, wiping the relieved look of their faces. (Y/N) winced on their behalf of the detention. "Now as I was saying. You will work in your pairs to help each other learn how to cast the Patronus Charm. Do not be worried if you do not succeed in a fully corporeal version on your first try as that is to be expected. I will personally award 100 house points if someone does it first time. Now, start practising." At once the students turn to their partners ready to try to get those 100 house points. "So basically you have to think of your happiest memory, right?" (Y/N) asks Lucius. "That is correct." He replied. "Well it can't be that hard...I've got one. Let me try." (Y/N) raises her wand, brings her happiest memory to the forefront of her mind. "Expecto Patronum." A (F/Animal) bursts from the tip of her wand, though not lasting long as the shock of the animals appearance causes her to forget the memory. "My word. Well I didn't expect that, 100 points to Slytherin Miss (L/N), well done." Came the voice of her teacher behind her before he moves on. "That was very impressive." Lucius tells her sounding astounded. "What did you think of, if you don't mind me asking?" "Not at all, I thought of the first time I made my parents proud. I had never seen them so happy and in turn, that made me happy." "I suppose I should try next." Lucius thought long and hard about which memory he would use before finally deciding. "Expecto Patronum" A Python lunged from the wand and hissed at a couple of students before it too disappeared. "Another 100 points to Slytherin, well done Mr. Malfoy. Yes, quite impressive." "Wow. For some reason I was expecting a ferret." (Y/N) stared at the spot where the python had previously been. "Why?" Lucius replied incredulous. "Not sure. What were you thinking of. Only fair that I asked since you asked me." "Ah yes, I was thinking of-" Lucius was cut off by the bell. "Tell me next time yeah?" (Y/N) says kindly before joining Bellatrix and Narcissa again for their next class. "I was thinking of the first time we spoke." Lucius says to no one.

________________________________________________________________ Potions Classroom Horace Slughorn was not (Y/N)'s favourite professor. In fact, she hated him and found him both annoying and distracting. He keeps trying to 'collect' her because she was the heir to the most powerful and famous pureblood family...Who was good at potions. Thus being the reason he steers clear of Sirius and James. During this lesson (Y/N) had been paired up with Severus Snape, a relief to be with someone who knows what they are doing for once. "If he comes up to us to ask how the potion is going one more time, I might end up cursing him." Snape murmurs to (Y/N). "Only if I don't curse him first." (Y/N) shares an amused smirk with Severus. "Honestly, who collects people. It's weird and creepy." "I'm glad he hasn't come after me yet." "That won't last long, I heard he has started to notice how good at potions you are." She replies empathetically. "Great and I thought Potter coming after me was bad enough." "He still coming after you?" (Y/N) tone changed from amused to concern at that. She cares for Severus and doesn't like it when her friends go after her other friends. "Nothing I can't handle (Y/N). Pass me the jar of Billywig Stings." The rest of the lesson continued uneventfully, if you don't count the fact that (Y/N) and Severus did indeed hit Professor Slughorn with mild curses when he asked about their potion again, nothing too harmful. (Y/N) meets up with Narcissa and Bellatrix at the end of the class to tell them she is heading toward the library for her free period.

________________________________________________________________ Library Corridor On the way to the library, (Y/N) bumps into the Marauders as they turn a corner. The boys immediately start apologising when they notice who was on the floor. Remus Lupin offers a hand to help her up. "Thanks. Where are you guys heading to in such a hurry?" "Nowhere!" Sirius says a little too quickly. "Ahuh....And you just expect me to believe that..." When the boys just stand there looking slightly guilty she realises that yes, they did expect her to just believe it. "Well I'm not stupid, so I'll ask again. Where are you going and can I join?" At this the boys snap their heads to look at her and Sirius starts smirking. "See, told you we could trust her. She may be a snake, but she is also a prankster." "You were the one that refused to tell me." (Y/N) reminds with a smirk. James looks at me with a slight frown. "I don't know guys, she won't like it." James murmurs to the others, (Y/N) only just catching it and her smirk morphs into a frown. "If this has anything to do with Severus, you can forget it!" "I told you she wouldn't like it." "Snivellus deserves everything he gets!" Sirius shouts at her. "Why? Because he's a Slytherin? Well so am I, am I your next target?" "You know we would never harm you (Y/N)" Remus interjects. "So you admit your pranks are harmful." She says sounding smug. "..." the boys keep quiet because they couldn't argue with that. "Fine, we won't prank Snivellus. But in return you have to help us pull of the biggest prank Hogwarts has ever seen." James bargains with me. (Y/N) takes a while to think about it...Yeah she could get detention or suspended if caught but Severus wouldn't be harmed. A snake always protects their own. "Fine. But not today, I've got to study." The boys look disappointed but understand they won't be able to persuade her otherwise. "Fine, see you tomorrow." They say their goodbyes and head on there way. (Y/N) wishes the unsuspecting person they go after, luck.

________________________________________________________________ Library As soon as (Y/N) enters the library, she spots a familiar red head. "Hey, Lily." Said red head looks up from the book she was reading. "Oh, hey (Y/N). Care to join me?" (Y/N) smiles at the offer and takes the seat opposite her after grabbing the book she needs to study. (Y/N) looked closer at the book Lily was studying. "Monster book of Monsters? We haven't needed that since third year, why are you reading that now and on-" (Y/N) peered at the page Lily was reading. "-Werewolves?" "Shh!" Lily covered (Y/N)'s mouth with her hands thus causing her to glare at Lily for the first time in years. Lily removed her hands after deeming it safe and not because she didn't like the glare, nope not that. "Sorry. But you were speaking too loud." "So whats so fascinating that you have decided to study werewolves?" Lily looks uncomfortable for a minute but then decides to talk anyway. "If I tell you, you have to promise not to do anything...you know...Slytherin." "That entire sentence was insulting." (Y/N) deadpanned. "Sorry, I just meant don't do anything rash." "That is also insulting, I'm not a Gryffindor. However, I will promise to hear what you have to say before deciding the next course of action. Placated?" "Yes...ok. Well....IthinkRemusisawerewolf." "...What? I didn't catch that at all." (Y/N) stated with slight amusement. "Try again...slowly." "I think Remus is a werewolf." (Y/N) stares blankly at Lily for a while before finally settling on "Is that all?" "Is that-? What do you mean is that all." She whisper-shouts angrily. "I mean I already knew that, and James knew, and Sirius. Hell, even Peter knew." "Why wasn't I told then!" "If it makes you feel better, we weren't told either. We guessed. And he didn't tell you for the same reason he didn't tell us. Fear. Of our reaction and thus our future treatment of him." (Y/N) stated calmly, hoping to save the boys from the red head's infamous wrath. "Oh. But he shouldn't fear that, we wouldn't treat him any different." "I don't think I'm the one you should be saying that to." (Y/N) said trying to steer her in the right direction. "Right. I've got to go find Remus. Thanks (Y/N)." Lily gathers her stuff in her bag then starts toward the exit, before she reaches it though she pauses and turns to her friend. "(Y/N)?" "Yes?" "Why do you talk to me? I mean your a pureblood Slytherin and I'm a muggleborn Gryffindor." (Y/N) takes a moment to think carefully about her answer but when she does it is with so much determination and sincerity. "Because your special Lily."

________________________________________________________________ Library Corridor As (Y/N) left the library she could hear voices round the corner at the end of the corridor. The voices seem to be getting louder and louder. As she neared the corner the voices suddenly became clearer. "I don't even get why the hat put you in Gryffindor, you're the wimpiest person I have ever had the displeasure of meeting." "You're also bad at everything you try, you've blown up so many cauldrons this year I have lost count." "And so much for Gryffindor loyalty, you're so wimpy that even your precious house mates aren't here to defend you. Aww boo hoo, is Longbottom going to cry. Hahaha." (Y/N) had finally heard enough, she stepped round the corner and was greeted by three Ravenclaws crowding a Gryffindor into the wall. "Enough!" (Y/N) shouted catching the students attention. "I have never heard such arrogant, disdainful drivel from a Ravenclaw in all my life. I know understand why I was put  in Slytherin instead of Ravenclaw as it seems they share a trait of becoming jealous of anyone who has the capability to be smarter than you, a trait I do not have. You should leave before the whole school learns that Ravenclaw is jealous of Mr. Longbottom for being better at Herbology than them." Throughout the whole speech, the Ravenclaws were becoming more and more angry and Longbottom was becoming more awed. The Ravenclaws, knowing that trying to attack a Slytherin through word or spells and winning was futile, left looking thoroughly shamed. (Y/N) turned towards the boy to see that he was staring right at her. "Um...Thanks. But I'm not sure whether to be glad or scared that a Slytherin defended me." The boy says with a nervous laugh. "Do not worry. I have no intention of making this situation worse for you." This received a calmer smile from the boy. The boy turned towards her and held out his hand. "Frank." (Y/N) took the hand and gave it a firm shake. "(Y/N)." "Oh so you're the 'hot' Slytherin I've been hearing about from Sirius." As if just realising what he said, Frank turned a bright shade of red. "Not that that's what we call you now. I mean it's not that I don't think your hot... I mean, I'm not trying to come on to you or anything, It's just...And now you're laughing at me." It was true, half way through Frank's stuttering, (Y/N) had indeed started to giggle. "Sorry, It's just, you're so shy that it's cute." "I'm not cute!" Frank shouted, appalled at the very idea of losing his pride as a man. "It's not a bad thing, I meant no shame to your pride. Where are you heading to now Frank?" "Um...what?" Frank looked completely lost at the sudden topic change. "Class Frank. Where are you heading?" "Oh, haha. Potions, you?" "Herbology, I suppose this is where we part then. It was a pleasure meeting you Frank." (Y/N) says as she heads outside towards the greenhouses. "Uh, you too (Y/N)."

________________________________________________________________ Outside Grounds (Y/N) hated the transition between winter and spring. The snow had melted but the Ice was still about and now it was more dangerous. In her hurry toward the greenhouses though, she had forgotten this entirely and thus caught the edge of an ice patch and she braced for the hard impact of he ground. Only, It didn't come. Instead she felt the impact of a hard chest. "Are you alright (Y/N)?" a familiar voice asked. "Regulus?" (Y/N) opened her eyes and did indeed notice Regulus steadying her. "Who else saves you from that awful ice. We really need to stop meeting like this." "This isn't funny Reg, I swear the ice is someone's evil invention." (Y/N) said with such conviction that it caused Regulus to burst out laughing. It wasn't long until (Y/N) joined him. "Heading to Herbology Reg?" "Of course, mind if I accompany you? Can't have you falling on anymore ice now can we?" (Y/N) bumped his shoulder with her own. "Shut up." They continued on their way to the greenhouses but a cold breeze crossed their paths and (Y/N) started shivering. "Cold?" "Yeah, not everyone remembers their coat Reg!" She didn't mean to snap, she was just so cold. But...then again, she wasn't. Wait what? (Y/N) looked down to see that a coat had been draped over her shoulders. She looked over at Regulus and there he was, minus one coat. "Reg?" "You were cold." He said with a shrug as if that answered everything. (Y/N) was going to argue more but the coat was so warm so instead she kept quiet and snuggled further into the coat. As they reached the greenhouses, it was considerably warmer inside, (Y/N) gave the coat back. "Thanks Reg." then she kissed his cheek and entered the greenhouse.

________________________________________________________________ Slytherin Common Room Herbology wasn't (Y/N)'s favourite lesson so the detail are blurry at best. She met up with Narcissa and Bellatrix at the end of the lesson and together they headed back to the common room. They started on the assignments that were due the next day, or rather Narcissa and (Y/N) did whilst Bellatrix messed around and tried to distract them. Eventually they gave up and decided to talk about their day and what they were going to do for Hogsmeade weekend. (Y/N) soon realised the time and decided to head to bed. "It's getting late guys, I'm heading up. Bella?" "I'm going to stay and talk to Cissa for a bit, head up without me." "Sure. Night Cissa, night Bella." "Night!" They both shouted behind her.

________________________________________________________________ Slytherin Dorm As soon as (Y/N) entered she went about her nightly routine, which was a lot easier to do without Bellatrix around. She changed into pyjamas and headed to bed. However, once she reached her bed, she noticed something on her pillow. A note with her name on it and a (Fave/Flower). She picked up the (F/F) and inhaled the beautiful scent. She then picked up the note and opened it. The note said...

[thequeenofadream]

Painting a Picture of Perfection (Brian May x Reader)

PART ONE | PART TWO

Summary: you, an up and coming artist, were in the park looking for some inspiration. you suddenly saw a curly haired guitarist and you were very much enlightened. 

Words: 2,762

Notes: swearing, veru fluff, freddie x mary, probably wrong timelines

A/N:  thinking of making this into a series cause i can imagine (Y/N) and Bri’s first date and etc! please tell me what you guys think <3

🖌 tagging: @obsessedwithrogertaylor @malekdarling @i-padfootblack-things

~~~~~~~~~

You were an art student at the Ealing Art College in 1970 and Your next assignment was to take inspiration from daily life, but nothing was really that interesting. You were sat on the grass in the park with your close friend and roommate, Mary, and the most ‘inspiring’ thing you had seen was a leaf falling off a tree. You sighed, not having clue what to do. Mary noticed your distress and put a hand on your shoulder.

“It’s fine (Y/N), maybe you’re just having some sort of artist’s block. I’m sure you’ll get over it”

You tried to fake a smile, but it was too obvious that you weren’t happy. You just did not see anything in particular that sparked a flame in you creativity. Everything just seemed monotonous and black and white. Mary stood up, giving you an empathetic look.

“I’ve gotta head to work, but you get home soon, okay?” She was sort of like your mother at some points. Reminding you that you’re a human and humans eat, sleep, socialize and so on. You just nodded, even though you know you’d probably lose track of time or wander about aimlessly.

She gives a knowing look, before heading off to the shop that she has worked in. You were alone now, and didn’t bother you that much. It gave you more room to think, but you couldn’t help but still feel empty.

It was that moment when a dark brown curly-haired man entered your vision. He was extremely tall and held a acoustic guitar in his hand. It seemed that he had just entered the park and was looking for a place to lounge about.

The sight of him intrigued you, so you decided to watch on.

He sat under the shade of a tree and started playing his guitar, experimenting with different notes. You could barely make out what he was playing since he wasn’t within close proximity of you, but from what you could hear, it sounded amazing. The chords he played came to life and told their own story. That spoke to you in more ways than you could count. It seemed that seeing someone divulge in their own artistic endeavors inspired you.

It was either that or you had caught feelings for the random stranger or quite possibly both.

The music was quickly drowned out by all the thoughts and ideas that came to your head. You sketched them down, trying your best to capture the essence of them before the moment passed. You had drawn him playing the guitar sitting under a tree, different stories and colours escaping from his guitar and into the sky. It was quite a sight to behold, you just needed to colour and shade it in.

You wanted to go up to the man and ask who he was, but when you looked up from your sketchbook he was gone. Your giant grin had faded into a small frown as you realized you missed your opportunity to talk to a cute, talented guy. You let out a deep exhale you didn’t even realise you were holding until this moment. You decided to go back to the flat and finish up the sketch.

“I’m home!”

You slammed the door shut and saw Freddie, Mary’s boyfriend, laying down on the couch with no Mary in sight. He was actually a classmate of yours in one of you classes, he thought you were great and vise-versa. He looked up at you, startled by your entrance. You just raised an eyebrow, wondering what he was up to now. He was fully clothed thought so that was nice.

“and what is Mr. Mercury doing here? Mary isn’t due till 5 o’clock.” You asked as he sat up straight giving you some room on the couch. You sat down beside him and placed your backpack on the floor next to the couch.  

“Thought I could get here early so we could leave together for my show, but I actually also wanted to talk to you.”

He said it proudly, feeling responsible for being early. You’ve never actually seen him perform so you thought about tagging along tonight. You’ve definitely have heard him sing but now with the band. Anyways, The plot has thickened. You wondered what he could possibly talk to you about, then again he usually just asked about class notes so it was probably no big deal. You let him continue.

“Could I see how your newest assignment going?”

His eyes lit up curiously, wondering what you had accomplished so far . Your face quickly turned beet red as your mind tried to rack up an excuse to why he most definitely could not. You couldn’t just saw you were inspired by a really cute stranger and drew him and didn’t even tell him. He quickly noticed this and it was his turn to raise an eyebrow.

“Something interesting happen?” He asked eyeing the backpack you had left on the floor. You were quick to shake your head

“Uh no-It’s just-uh-no”

It was as if your mind had just shut down and you couldn’t say or do anything. You were frozen. Fred took this an opportunity to snatch the sketchbook in your bag and make a beeline to the bathroom. You were quickly snapped out of your trance and ran after him, but it was too late he had locked the door You knocked on the door furiously demanding him to let you in. You grabbed the closest thing to you and used it as a threat.

“FARROKH BULSARA I WILL STICK A CANDLE UP YOUR ASS.”

However Freddie knew you were far too nice to do so. He opened up your sketchbook to see a drawing of his bandmate, Brian May, under a tree playing the guitar. How curious he thought. Did you know that was Brian? Did you talk to him? Most importantly, did you develop a crush for the guitarist? He needed more details and gave into letting you in. He unlocked the door to see heat radiating off of you due to the anger and embarrassment.

“Give me that.”

You said taking it out of Freddie’s hand. You marched back to the living room and grunted as you sat back down, arms crossed. Freddie followed quietly and cautiously, thinking of how he could bring it up without pissing you off any further. He sat down on a recliner next to the couch, giving you some space.

“It’s really good.” He broke the silence with a compliment, hoping you’d forgive him. You took a deep breathe and decided to stop overreacting. You looked up and gave him a soft smile. “Thanks.” You said shyly, in contrast to the emotions you were displaying just earlier. He smiled back, happy that you had calmed down.

“So where’d you get the inspiration.”

You decided to just come clean. It wasn’t as if it were strange to talk about someone you had thought was cute. Mary talked about Freddie all the time, so you could surely talk about someone you developed the slightest crush on.

“I saw this guy in the park.” You started as Freddie leaned in closer, listening intently.

“He sat under a tree in the park and started playing some music which I thought was really nice. I got inspired and drew well.” You held up the sketch, feeling a little more confident. “Anyways, by the time I was done, I didn’t notice that he had left.” Your expression looking miserable as you remember you hadn’t even gotten his name. Fred then thought of plan to get two of his friends a date and watch you unravel at the sight of your mystery crush. He smirked at the thought, while you were still too flustered to notice.

“Don’t worry, (Y/N). You’ll probably see him again.”

Fast forward to an hour later, you were with Mary and Fred on your way to bar he was performing at tonight. It was about a five minute walk away so it wasn’t too bad. You slightly felt like the third wheel, but they did their best not to let you feel that way. You were coming up to the bar and you saw all the light from the bar practically gleaming off the windows. You thought they must have one hell of a set to get to perform here.

Fred stepped in first and held door open for you and Mary. You gave him a small curtsy and you both giggled at how formal you two were being. He led you two backstage to see a blonde, blue eyed drummer, a brunet bassist and-

“Oh no.”

You had let the words slip right out your mouth and everyone had heard. You went back your flustered state and wanted to hide in a bush. Freddie tried to keep in his laughter as he saw you go turn as red a tomato. You saw him out of the corner of your eye and you started regretting that you didn’t shove the candle up his ass.

“(Y/N), this is Roger Taylor, John Deacon, and last but not least, the charming Brian May.” Freddie smirked while pointing to the respectively. You had accidentally made direct eye contact with Brian and quickly looked away. He was so much more pretty up close. You couldn’t even look at Brian and just desperately tried to escape the situation. Mary sensed your discomfort; at times like this she knew just what to do.

“So-”

“(Y/N) and I are gonna head to the bathroom for a second, we’ll be right back.” Mary smiled apologetically. She linked arms with you and hurried down the hall into the bathroom. You just went along with it, seeing as you had no real other choice.  She closed the door and looked straight at you.

“Okay I know Roger’s hot and all, but-”

“No, no it’s not Roger.” You said awkwardly scratching the back of your head, not really knowing how to say this again. You explained the situation to her and she responded with an ‘Ohhhh.’ She felt bad, but she was trying to hold in laughter because of what Fred did, however it she could not hold it in any longer. She started laughing and all you could do was grunt like a child.

“It’s not funny.” You said crossing your arms for what felt like the hundredth time. She apologized in between laughs, but you were still mad. After the laughter had died down, she spoke up again.

“So you have a crush on Bri?”

“You could say so.” You finally admitted, smiling like a schoolgirl with a middle school crush. Mary let out a squeal as quietly as possible and you just rolled your eyes. “What am I gonna do?” You asked, feeling nervous to even step back outside.

“Just be you.” She said as she opened the door for you, gesturing you to leave.

“Hey, sorry for that, we’re back.” Mary said letting go of your arm. You looked around to see the once again, all with their instruments. You waved at them, no really feeling like talking as of the moment. Brian was the first to come up to you and hold out a hand.

“Hey (Y/N), I hope you’ll enjoy the set later.”

You nodded and took his hand shaking it gently. Him being there, already improved the set by a 100% so you didn’t see how it could go wrong. Roger and John had also introduced themselves to you before they head out onto the stage to perform. You all talked together, about your interest and such, but you were really hitting it off with Brian and you could not be any happier. Before you left, Bri told you that he’d see you in the crowd. You basically had a mental breakdown because you didn’t know if he meant you as a plural or a singular noun.

The show was great and you really felt their energy blowing the roof off the place. You felt like you were in an arena with thousands of people and Queen was at the center of it all. The way Freddie entranced the crowd was amazing, he could get them all to scream the lyrics at the top of their lungs. John was clearly great at the bass and he would also move around the stage, slightly. You could tell he was a tad shy, but desperately trying to break out of his shell. Roger was essentially a perfect drummer; You couldn’t tell how he had control over all of the rhythms, and how he had done the solo during ‘keep yourself alive’.

Last but not least, there was Brian. He was perfect. You could tell that music was truly his passion and that enchanted you beyond words. You tried not to stare for most of the time, but you couldn’t help it. He’d occasionally flash a wink or smile and you’d giggle. You just wanted him to kiss you softly under the light of a thousand suns; something so sweet yet so intense.

As the set came to an end, you met the four of them backstage to see they were already packing things up. You and Mary tried your best to bring them out into the van and you all finished up quicker. After that was all over, you all decided to go back inside for a round of drinks or two, all except Brian, because he was driving later on.

Sooner or later, you were left alone with Brian sitting on the stools, watching everyone else dance to some other music. You decided it was your time to be confident while you still had alcohol in you so you spoke up.

“I actually saw you earlier.” You said as he looked up at you, curious to hear what you had to say. “At the park, I think you were playing some songs.” You continued, waiting to hear what he’d say.

“Oh, why didn’t you come over?” He did remember seeing a pretty girl off in the distance at the park, but she seemed concentrated on something so he didn't bother. He wondered if that was you.

“Well, actually the tunes you played were so good that it inspired me to draw. I’m actually an art student like fred.” You confessed, feeling like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders that would last only until his next question.

“What’d you draw?”

You contemplated whether exposing yourself or running away once again, then again running away was all you ever seemed to do. You decided you needed to step up and show him. Freddie said it was good after all. You hesitated for a moment, but then started rummaging through your bag to find it. You pulled it out and opened to the page you had been looking for. You handed it to him, awaiting his response.

Brian thought it was absolutely wonderful; he didn’t even imagine anyone could portray him a such. Although it looked unfinished, he was impressed by all the small details you had caught and how creative it was. You left him breathless.

“It’s not finished, bu-”

“No, yeah don’t worry it’s really wonderful. It’s brilliant.”

He couldn’t take his eyes off of it. You couldn’t help but smile at the ground, flattered by his compliments. Once he was done, he looked back up at you and handed you the book.

“It doesn’t come off as creepy, does it?”

“No, no. It’s magnificent. I wish I could draw half as good as you. You really are talented, (Y/N).”

And as if you thought you couldn’t blush any harder than all the previous times, Brian May had proved you wrong. You were much more than relieved to see that he loved it. It warmed your heart.

“Well, I wish I could play the guitar just as good as you, you inspired me after all.” You laughed, feeling confidence run through your veins. Bri now blushed, thinking about how he inspired you like that. He couldn’t believe he sparked that kind of passion in you.

“Forgive me for being a tad forward but maybe, I could inspire you a bit more next friday night?” He responded, leaving you starstruck. You didn’t actually think you’d get this far so you had no idea what to do other than to say yes, so you did.

“I’d love to Bri.” You smiled sweetly as you took his hands intertwining his with yours.

That was where it all started.

~~~~~~~~~

[miraculouscontent]

Will you make an analysis of Chameleon? That... thing gives a lot to talk about

I had no plan to initially because I figured that the worst of it was in the teaser, but…

Well, you’re not wrong in saying that it gave me a lot to talk about.

[”Collecting” Thoughts]

I want to start by talking about this episode not as a singular episode trapped in a vacuum, but as a season opener. It’s bad enough that this episode exists on its own, but it’s important to compare it to The Collector in terms of how it acts as a follow-up to the Season 2 finale.

Volpina introduced the grimoire via Adrien and had Marinette visiting Master Fu. The Collector follows exactly in its footsteps, taking place immediately after and showing the consequences of Adrien stealing the book. The Collector was a GREAT follow-up to Volpina, with the only sad thing being that Marinette took the fall for something Lila did; in fact, Lila herself isn’t even mentioned. Still, it furthers the plot and was set up perfectly by Volpina to continue the story.

Now, what did Heroes’ Day do?

Catalyst brought back Lila and set up Gabriel knowing more about his own powers. It set up his closer relationship with Natalie (regardless of how people feel about that), which was followed up in Mayura by Natalie taking the Peacock Miraculous to protect Hawk Moth.

It was also established that the Peacock Miraculous is damaged in some way. There’s no visible wear on it, but it causes Natalie to appear sick.

With that in mind, what did Chameleon do to follow up on that?

…It brought back Lila. That’s it. No talks with Master Fu, no discussion on the Peacock; there’s just nothing. Even Mayura itself didn’t have Marinette/Adrien and Fu talking about the fact that they know Hawk Moth has the Peacock on his side now.

As a season opener, Chameleon is a complete and total failure. Catalyst had already brought Lila back and this is essentially just a worse version of the way that Catalyst did it (disregarding the fact that we were blindsided by Lila in the first place because she only got passing mentions until the Season 2 finale).

All Chameleon wants to do is set up Lila as an antagonist, and even that’s in the laziest way possible.

Heck. We don’t even get a new opening. It’s the exact same as season 2, which at least went through the effort to change the backgrounds and some images. It was effective to make it different enough to be recognizable.

The seating change that happens in this episode could’ve been something to help Season 3 stand out and be its own thing, but it doesn’t stick around. I know I’m gonna complain about that whole scene in a moment, but keep in mind that I’m complaining about how the seating change happened, not the fact that it happened at all.

That said, let’s go scene by scene, shall we?

[Opening Scene - A Lack of Care]

Marinette dashing into the school due to running a little late perfectly exemplifies how this episode is going to hurt you, and I don’t mean that in a good way.

Remember Fred? Mylene’s father and the guy from The Mime? Of course you do, because he was very nice to Marinette and she made him a hat

In this episode, however, he glares at Marinette when she bolts past him (not even knocking him over mind you; just running a bit late as students do from time to time). It’s just a dumb five seconds, but it’s a great representation of what you’re in for; typically good people that Marinette helped in the past turning against her. It sets the tone and everything.

Moving onto the actual meat of the episode though, might I say that one of the worst things a writer can do is present us with a better idea only to strip it away from us?

This episode does just that when Marinette presumes that Alya saved her a seat next to Adrien. That presumption isn’t really a stretch. Alya is her supposed best friend and everyone is sitting with someone else, so it’d make sense that’d she’d sit there.

However, not only did Alya not try to get Marinette that seat, but the thought didn’t even seem to cross her mind. She acts confused by the fact that Marinette even considered that she’d be sitting with Adrien.

That’s because Alya didn’t consider that herself. No one considered that themself. No one texted Marinette about this arrangement, no one asked her, and no one thought it was wrong to shove Marinette to the back row without her permission. Marinette gets the shaft and we’re not even given a reason why everyone thought it’d be a great idea (Marinette just talked about being worried that she’d be distracted by Adrien; it still would’ve been rude not to ask her, but that would’ve been a better reason to put her somewhere where she’s almost as far away from Adrien as possible).

That’s not even getting into the fact that Marinette took that seat herself all the way back in Origins. She worked for that seat. She stood strong against Chloe and that seat was her reward.

But then, it was taken away from her, like the seat was some sort of metaphor for all the care everyone had for her.

Enter Lila, who is a masterpiece example of how to annoy the audience as quickly as possible. She lies compulsively (most lies not even being believable), uses pity to gain affection, and gets incredibly petty when confronted.

Worst of all, aside from Marinette and only partially Adrien, everyone is fooled by her lies. Everyone falls at her feet and does everything she asks, probably both because they pity her and also because she’s the equivalent of a celebrity (saving Jagged’s cat, knowing Prince Ali, etc.).

Even Miss Bustier doesn’t care that Marinette’s been put in the back. When Marinette asks about it, Miss Bustier fixates on whether Marinette has a hearing/sight issue or not. Miss Bustier is supposed to be an empathetic teacher who cares about her students, yet Zombiezou over here doesn’t have a reason for putting Marinette in the back when Chloe and Adrien are sitting in the front despite having no issues with hearing or sight.

Also, talking about the classmates themselves, it’s easy to say that Marinette looks in the wrong because she said “no” when Adrien offered up his seat, but that’s not taking into account that of course Marinette wouldn’t want Adrien to move for her. She sees Adrien as a nice guy, so she wouldn’t think he’d deserve to sit in the back by himself.

No one in the class considers this though, because of course they don’t. That’s just how this episode wants to work for the sake of its disjointed plot.

Then, Lila makes it all about herself, which convinces the class to get upset at their “everyday Ladybug.” It’s a jarring transition from the Season 2 finale, to say the least.

I’ll admit: before I saw the akuma going after Marinette, I honestly thought there would be a twist where Lila was already akumatized and everyone in the school were just going off her whim due to a spell, with Marinette not being affected because she was late to class.

(Probably would’ve fixed it too. Add in an opening of Mari talking to Fu about the Peacock, then a scene after Lila’s de-akumatization where Gabriel checks on Natalie and talks about what good akuma-bait Lila is… you’ve got a passable episode right there!)

The problem with this scene is how immediately everyone glares at Marinette. No one spoke up for her to say, “I’m sure Marinette didn’t mean it like that.” Heck, even if someone just asked why Marinette was acting like this, that would’ve been something, because Marinette is so obviously acting like this for a reason.

It’s not even like I don’t see why Marinette gets put in the back; it’s because no one will see the akuma if she’s sitting back there all alone.

…In fact, keep this in mind, because I’m going to bring it up later.

Anyway, it’s undeniable that Marinette gets the most disrespect in this episode, but I’d also like to bring attention to Adrien. Yeah, he glared at Marinette (I know what the writing staff said; it’s irrelevant to me unless the episode gets edited), but consider how much Lila gets into his personal space and then remember that Nino is sitting right behind them. We see Marinette be plenty angry about Lila stroking Adrien’s shoulder because she knows that Lila is full of it and is taking advantage of Adrien’s good nature, but even if Nino doesn’t know, shouldn’t he be upset by a clearly-uncomfortable Adrien?

[The Cafeteria Scene - How to Kill a Character in Two Minutes]

(Note: shoutout to Nathaniel, who’s sitting by himself and not being pulled in by catering to Lila’s needs; both he and Ivan seemed to be the ones with the most questionable expressions in the glaring scene when referring to whether or not they’re angry with Marinette. I still won’t give them a pass because the general atmosphere of the scene implied that everyone was angry at Marinette, but still. Ivan and Alix also don’t seem to show up in the cafeteria at all, but both of them along with Nathaniel return for the ending scene where Lila’s still lying. All of them do NOTHING in regards to stopping her, so I won’t give them any points, but I still thought I’d mention it.)

One of the biggest reasons that Lila doesn’t work as the antagonist she should be is because she isn’t clever enough. Her lies are often not thought through and are only believed because everyone has been dumbed down due to the narrative wanting them to obey her every command to make Marinette progressively more upset.

And it’s honestly hard for me to see the characters acting like this even when I know that it’s not in-character. If it was just acting kind to someone, then sure, whatever, they can be dumb, but not when it comes at the expense of their relationship with Marinette.

It’s hard because these scenes still exist. Whether it’s attempted to be written off as a joke or not, I’ll still have to watch future episodes and see these characters interacting with Marinette with the knowledge that she nearly got akumatized because they abandoned her in her time of need and they never apologized for it, at least not here.

The jokes don’t even work most of the time because they’re centered around how much Lila is fooling everyone, which shouldn’t be joked about because people don’t want to see jokes being cracked about something they hate happening when they’re already frustrated by it!

Alya and Nino just make everything worse. Their presence in this episode does nothing but show how badly this episode is trying to make you ignore what’s happening to Marinette (and partly Adrien).

Let’s start with Alya, Marinette’s supposed best friend. Now, she was already on thin ice when it came to the Lila situation considering what she said in Catalyst, but she’s even more blatant here with how little she knows Marinette.

It takes until the cafeteria scene for Alya to ask Marinette what’s bothering her. Except, she doesn’t phrase it that way. She presumes that Marinette barely knows Lila despite having no evidence of that. In fact, she has evidence to show the exact opposite; that something bad happened and Alya should be wary of Lila because Marinette is wary of her.

And then Alya has the gall - the GALL - to ask if Marinette has proof that Lila doesn’t know Ladybug, because “a good reporter always verifies their sources.”

Says the reporter who was so sure that Ladybug owned the history book she dropped instead of wondering if she might be giving it back to someone.

Says the reporter who was so positive that Chloe was Ladybug when talking to Nino, based on little more than Chloe having a Ladybug outfit that probably tons of people in Paris do because they’re likely a popular costume in stores.

Says the reporter who posted a video, on her Ladyblog, of Lila claiming that she was friends with Ladybug, despite having no proof, no evidence, and not verifying that claim with Ladybug herself.

Give me a break. Even if Alya has just “improved since then,” that doesn’t excuse the fact that Marinette should be a trusted source and that Alya should realize her own contradiction because they’re talking about Lila in the first place.

If Marinette needs proof that Lila’s not friends with Ladybug, then where’s Alya’s proof that Lila is? Because Lila knows other celebrities? There’s a lot of famous people who Ladybug has saved but isn’t friends with (ex: Jagged Stone, XY), so what makes Lila so special? Besides, Marinette knows famous people too. Even disregarding that, Alya is basically telling Marinette, “You’re my best friend, but I also believe Lila over you because Lila is more special than you are.”

Marinette is not doing this out of jealousy; we’ve established this already in Frozer, which Alya was there for when Marinette was okay with Adrien dating someone else. Marinette would only be upset by Lila if she had a reason to be. Alya needs to stop minimizing Marinette’s problems by boiling them down to jealousy based on information she doesn’t have.

I just can’t even imagine how hurtful that is to Marinette. Her own best friend doesn’t believe her and doesn’t even have Marinette’s motive right.

Oh, and then Nino fixates on the fact that Marinette eavesdropped on Lila and Adrien instead of the fact that Lila lies constantly.

You know, Nino, who watched Marinette from a distance due to his crush in Animan. Is that a tiny offense? Absolutely (even Marinette has watched Adrien), but my point is, nobody has their hands clean.

Marinette stated right up front that Lila felt off to her, which should’ve implied that Lila could’ve been already akumatized and thus Marinette had every right to follow her to make sure so no one else would fall under her trap, but Nino presumes the worst of her and instead chastizes her for eavesdropping on Lila and Adrien.

We talked about it in the last segment, but Nino did nothing when Lila was getting in Adrien’s personal space. Nino, at least in this episode, is much more interested in criticizing Marinette’s behavior than actually doing anything about Lila’s.

And of course, the narrative neglects Marinette mentioning that Ladybug showed up to yell at Lila or that she saw Lila steal the book because they need to make it look like Marinette has no evidence whatsoever. It’s not like mentioning the book would be a big deal, because Nino knew in The Collector that Adrien had lost Gabriel’s book. All it’d take is, “I saw Lila steal Adrien’s book so she could get information to lie to him with. She threw it in the garbage when Adrien came by and then I returned it to Gabriel the next day because I didn’t know how to give it back to Adrien without looking bad.”

Then all it takes is asking Adrien and Adrien would probably admit, “Yeah, I remember last having the book with Lila.”

But no. Not even Alya and Nino can be on Marinette’s side. Marinette has to struggle alone because I guess they needed a hook for this episode and it’s “could Marinette get akumatized???”

If their story was actually of value, they wouldn’t need to set up a fake hook for a trailer. The story should be able to stand on its own without needing to set up something exciting that won’t actually happen.

Which brings us to talking about Lila.

[Freaking Lila]

Lila is a good character in concept. I love the idea of her as a foil to Marinette; Marinette hates liars but gets what she wants through hard work and effort, whereas Lila lies all the time and gets what she wants through no work at all and tons of emotional manipulation.

But there’s just not enough care put into her lies. When we see Lila, the reaction we should have is to think about how amazing she is at lying and how understandable it is that everyone is falling for it.

Instead, I feel incredibly annoyed at the fact that Lila is going around spouting nonsense that no one but Marinette ever tries to check out. It’s ridiculous.

And Chloe is completely left out of this equation; the only other person aside from Marinette who has real connections that’d be able to out Lila. Chloe gets nothing of value in the entire episode. Her and Sabrina just stay right in their original seats and do so little that you’d be forgiven for thinking that they were just copy-pasted from some other episode because the script writers forgot to include them.

Chloe also does nothing about Lila stroking Adrien, because the show still cannot decide if they’re friends and if Chloe has a crush on Adrien. Actual chances at showing what it’d be like if Chloe put her talents towards something good are thrown out the window because they needed all that run time to have Marinette be miserable.

Lila is also very annoying as Chameleon. I liked that she just grabbed the akuma to show just how antagonistic she is, but she acts really obnoxious as Adrien.

To a degree, I get that. She was mad at Adrien, so of course it makes sense for her to make him look like a fool.

BUT, if she’s supposed to be such a master manipulator, why not act similarly to Adrien but just with a meaner streak?

They could’ve done another twist here as well. Instead of showing Lila taking Adrien’s form, why not cut right to Adrien (but actually Lila) making fun of Nino and then taking his cap, but with a tone that’s much more convincing of Adrien? Heck, Lila doesn’t even bother using Adrien’s form to go mess with Marinette; she just goes for Nino and then starts jumping around like a lunatic.

And sure, it was funny to see her get turned into a clam and promptly destroyed (Ladybug had a pun about anemones that made me laugh way too hard), but what did she actually do as Chameleon? She ran around like an idiot, knocked Chat out with the kiss (as if parts of the fandom weren’t already tired enough of that; also, there were probably at least three different things Chat could’ve done to stop that kiss without throwing himself in the middle of it), and then makes people upset for stuff that Miraculous Ladybug fixes anyway.

She does less as an akuma than she does as a person. That’s not how akuma should work.

Though, I guess it’s hard to top what she did as a person considering Adrien’s role in the plot.

[Adrien the Doormat]

Lately, Adrien has garnered a certain… reputation. It started with little things in Season 1, but by the end of Season 2, those little things weren’t so little anymore and were becoming harder and harder to defend.

That brings us to here, where Adrien joins everyone else in the “not defending Marinette” club, but it’s worse because he’s aware that Lila is a liar. Yeah, he tries to passively get her to stop lying, but Marinette is who he should be worried about.

And yet, by the end, he tells her not to do anything. I would like to think that he was trying to say that Lila’s lies would eventually catch her in the act, but that was one of the worst ways to word it.

Firstly, she’s presumably been lying all her life. Everyone’s fallen for her ruse. She’ll have to make a crucial mistake to even make a single person wary of her.

Secondly, this passivity of Adrien has been a recurring problem thoughout at least Season 2. His friends might not be suffering exactly, but Lila’s making them look like fools and he’s just letting her go on unabated. Just imagine what the classmates’ reactions would if they learned that Adrien knew that Lila was lying the whole time and did nothing while they obeyed her every need (though this will very likely go unaddressed and no one will know that Adrien knows except Marinette). At his current levels of passiveness, I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if Lila starts being physical with him again in future episodes and he continues to do nothing about it.

Thirdly, yes actually, exposing Lila will make things better. It’ll keep everyone else in check so they’re not constantly falling at Lila’s feet. Adrien’s only thinking about Lila and (presumably) the fact that she has the potential to become akumatized again. He has yet to learn that some people just have to be put into place, even if it means fighting an akuma afterward.

Fourthly, making a bad guy suffer has turned them into a good guy. That was literally Chloe in Despair Bear and Malediktator. It was when the niceness was brought back and boundaries stopped being set that she returned to her old ways. So, no, sometimes being punished is absolutely necessary and Lila hurting more is an inevitability.

Fifthly and most importantly, this scene deprives Marinette of all the agency she has, putting Adrien on a moral high ground yet again. I understand where Adrien is coming from - that he and Marinette know the truth and can talk about it so neither have to be miserable over Lila - but he clearly hasn’t thought this through. They basically just got back from an akuma attack and he’s only focused on preventing Lila from being akumatized again.

Adrien could’ve even argued that Lila would just lie her way around Marinette calling her out, but he doesn’t say that. It makes it seem like he’s not at all concerned about how Marinette comes out of this and is just trying to make her feel better about doing absolutely nothing to solve her problems. I get that he already tried to help Lila and it didn’t work, which might also be why he’s taking the passive route, but again, that’s not what he says!

Adrien isn’t suffering from this like Marinette is. Marinette is close to a majority of the class and was miserable because no one stood up for her or believed her. Adrien is close to Nino, sure, but really, how many times have they even had passing conversation in the entirety of Season 2? It isn’t much!

We’ve done this before in other episodes. Marinette isn’t allowed to do virtually anything anymore without someone getting on her case for it, even if she’s in the right.

It’s damaging, to both her character and the narrative.

[Back in the Classroom - Go with the Quo]

I appreciate that Adrien sat down with Marinette instead of Lila, but what Adrien says about taking the high road simply isn’t true. This isn’t the high road; this is complacency in a bad situation. Sometimes, taking the high road actually requires a detour. Doing the thing that’s “morally right” can mean accepting that some morally wrong things may have to be done to uphold that rightness.

And, of course, we get no apology. There’s no apology for Marinette’s hurt feelings. Alya returns to sitting next to Marinette, even going so far as to ask teasingly if Marinette really thought that Alya would let her sit by herself.

An insult to the audience’s intelligence, if not their memory, given the fact that it’s literally what Alya did at the very start of the episode.

Lila also (expectedly) continues to lie, and while I’m thankful that Adrien isn’t the least bit pleased by her sitting next to him, I’ll hold my judgment until the next time they have a scene together.

Also, everyone wanting to change seats out of nowhere despite having no established reason is incredibly weird, considering it’s Ivan who started the massive change and he’s sitting next to Mylene. Sure, Marinette thought about getting distracted by Adrien, but after Ivan and Mylene have been in an established relationship for so long, I’d think they’d have more self-control! Nathaniel, I get, because he can draw behind Ivan without being seen by the teacher, but everyone else makes little to no sense to me.

Not only that, but… it’s Season 3. We’ve been deprived of Adrienette development so many times, and when we’re finally given a scene where Adrien and Marinette are simply sitting together in class, we’re deprived of it. It’s like what I thought of Frozer; does such a small piece of development really take the ship so far that it needs to be immediately taken away from us?

This means that, for the third time in this episode, we’re presented with an idea that’s way better than what they end up doing. We already saw Marinette trailing off about being distracted by Adrien, so seeing it again just tests the patience of the Adrienette shippers who were hoping for them to stay sitting together.

[In Front of the School - Dragged By a Marinette]

I will give this episode one thing in that the scene at the end with Lila isn’t bad. The moments where Lila and Marinette are alone are miles better than almost any other scene in this entire episode. (I’d complain about the fact that Tikki isn’t angry over Lila and doesn’t validate Marinette’s feelings, but I feel like I’ve been through this song and dance before. Also, Tikki tries at least, even if for a moment.)

And yet, when Marinette tells Lila off with such a simple phrase, I don’t feel all the emotions I know that the episode is trying to make me feel.

I feel satisfied that Lila was annoyed by the end of the episode - it wasn’t nearly enough but it was SOMETHING - yet I don’t feel confident alongside Marinette.

There’s this confidence from Marinette that everything will be okay; that it’ll all be fine because she believes in her friends and that Adrien is on her side.

But I don’t think I believe that. I don’t buy that; not with the passive Adrien we saw here and not with the way Marinette’s “friends” treated her. Instead of feeling confident, I feel a growing sense of dread that things could just get worse from here. I don’t know how, but if the class treats Marinette in the future with the same dismissiveness that they did here, I can only feel afraid that Marinette is going to get all that confidence sucked away.

It’s not a pleasant feeling.

[Did Anyone Ask For This?]

I see what this episode wanted to be. I see what it wanted to do. It wanted to re-introduce Lila and (presumably) set her up as a recurring antagonist for this season. It wanted to have this dramatic scenario where everyone turns against her and both her and Adrien are the odd ones out.

It just asks for too much. To enjoy the episode wholly and completely, it wants you to buy so many things it’s throwing at you: Lila’s lies, Marinette being trashed for the upteenth time, and a terrible lesson for the character it’s being centered around.

And what’s the alternative to the out-of-character behavior? That these characters actually are so stupid and disloyal to Marinette that they’d actually do these things? It won’t get rid of the bad taste in my mouth either way, but I’d much rather believe that this is just terrible foresight at play than actual character assassination!

And… sure. Maybe sometime far in the future (probably near the end of Season 3), Lila will finally be revealed as the liar she is and they MIGHT apologize to Marinette. However, I say ‘might’ because Marinette has been told not to do anything about Lila, so it’s entirely possible that Marinette will just be like “finally” to herself but no one will apologize to her because they’ll conveniently forget about what happened here.

Even if they do apologize though - even if Adrien is actually in the wrong and they plan on addressing that - it’ll be too little too late. As a standalone episode, this is terrible. This episode makes me want Lila to get her comeupance, and while the ending at least has her get annoyed, it’s not enough considering that 80% of the episode was dedicated to Marinette’s misery and Lila being irritating. We’re supposed to feel satisfied by the end of each episode, but I’m instead left with an empty feeling in my gut.

This is where the thing I told you to remember - how Marinette is shoved to the back so no one sees the akuma - needs to be brought back. When the episode shoves Marinette to the back seat… when no one hears Lila’s threat to Marinette and it never comes up again… when Adrien tells her not to act… and when Marinette receives no apology for everything that’s happened… it’s giving a very clear message.

It’s saying that Marinette’s feelings don’t matter. That, no matter what, Marinette must take the high road regardless of what she feels. She’s the superheroine, so she has to always been perfect and always be a role model. Anything else is disgraceful.

Revealing Marinette’s misery to anyone means making everyone else look bad, so Marinette has to suffer alone, with Tikki comforting her only so she doesn’t get akumatized. Everyone else looks in the right because they don’t know everything and Marinette is just left there with her feelings hanging in the air.

That’s why the teaser alone caused people to freak out. We’ve been shown this multiple times before and this was just the final nail in the coffin.

It’s fair to say that Marinette should be angry with her friends. I wouldn’t blame anyone for being upset that Marinette was centering all her hate onto Lila.

But… at the same time, if we’re looking at it from a realistic point of view, I can see why she does it.

It’s a coping mechanism.

Almost all of Marinette’s friends are in that class. If she loses them, she only has a few left.

It’s easier to blame Lila. It’s easier to pretend that her friends aren’t betraying her and that it’s all Lila’s fault.

Lila is a single target that she feels she can deal with. To Marinette, taking care of Lila’s lies means that everything goes back to the way it was before.

Unfortunately, that’s not how it works. Her friends still need to apologize and promise not to repeat these mistakes in the future. Without it, their friendship is meaningless.

But that’s just how Marinette works. She’ll let it slide. She’ll let herself take the fall because that’s what she does. She’s been conditioned by episode upon episode to let people like Lila go around unchecked and feel better about themself just to keep akuma from happening even if it’d be more beneficial to do otherwise.

As long as it keeps the peace and lets Marinette keep her friends, she’ll do whatever passive thing she’s told to do.

Because, remember: at least in episodes like these, Marinette’s feelings don’t matter…

[durazno-dulce]

All I Want

A/N: This is kinda bad?? My first time posting writing on here, this follows the song All I Want by Kodaline. Sorry if it’s terrible. 

Word Count: 1.5k+

(Part 2)

(Masterlist)

All I want is nothing more

To hear you knocking at my door

(Y/N) sat on her couch in an empty house wrapped in a blanket staring off into the void, her mind lost in thought. Her thoughts lingered to the night she had last seen Roger.

“I love you, I promise I do.” He said pleading with her, his eyes puffy with tears streaming down.

“You may love me,” she said voice quivering and stifling her cries,”but you’re not in love with me and it’s okay, I understand but I can’t hold onto somebody whose found that in somebody else.”

“Please don’t do this, it’s not like that.” He protested as though he were trying to make himself believe the words that were coming out of his mouth.

“I will always love you, but it time to let go of this, it’s not fair to hold onto me when I’m preventing you from being with someone you truly love.” She sobbed, her voice was somber but firm on her decision. Roger opened his mouth to say something but his mind was trying to process everything not allowing him to get any words out. (Y/N) picked up her bags and walked to the door.

“I wish-“ she started before a lump in her throat stopped her from continuing.

She let out a sob before continuing. “I wish it were different, I wish you could’ve found love in me, but I know you can’t control that.” She blurted out before breaking down.

That had been weeks ago, the sting of heartbreak seemed endless and her thoughts added salt to the wound. She gazed at the door longing for the sound of a knock. (Y/N) longed to see the beautifully disheveled hair and serene blue eyes staring back at her with an embrace as though nothing had happened. Instead she was only met with a deafening silence, only the soft crackling of the fireplace and soft pattering of rain could be heard making her feel more alone then before.

'Cause if I could see your face once more

I could die as a happy man I'm sure

Roger sat at the dining table of his flat, messy hair and dried tears lingered on the features of his face. His breakfast now seemingly unappetizing as he messed with the piece of toast in his hand. He got up from his table and threw it in the bin before walking into the living room void of (Y/N)’s personable items leaving it bare of any reminders of her.

Some of Audrey’s things lingered in his flat, she was the girl that he fell for, it was a small innocent crush that escalated. (Y/N) caught on and was quick to end things with Roger when she found out about the nature of their relationship, but he knew the connection with Audrey was nothing that compared to the one with (Y/N).

While Roger searches for a drumstick he had lost days prior he found a photo album, one that (Y/N) had made him for prior to the American tour so he could see her everyday and they both made sure to fill the book with everything they did. He opened up the album looking at each picture (Y/N)’s loving gaze as he laughed at something idiotic or more intimate moments where they each took time taking candid photos of one another.

His heart fluttered at each picture, before remembering his current state. His heart ached to see her, a picture couldn’t do justice to the beauty that his heart fell for the first time he saw her.

When you said your last goodbye

I died a little bit inside

(Y/N) regained her composure as she fiddled with the ring on her finger. Her chest felt tight as she struggled on each breath, her crying feeling endless. Her heart broke as she slipped the ring off her finger watching Rogers face fall, emotions getting to the best of him. He turned away, he couldn’t bare to watch his promise of a future being broken in a second.

She placed the ring on the small table by the door, she once again grabbed her things. She walked up to him looking flustered, but he still saw her beauty beyond the mess. She gave him one last kiss on the cheek before opening the door.

“I love you.” She said giving him one last sad smile before closing the door behind her and walking out of Rogers life.

I lay in tears in bed all night

Alone without you by my side

(Y/N) finally got up from her spot on the couch and walked into the restroom, she looked at herself in the mirror as she looked in disgust. Her lack of self care was starting to show after the past couple of weeks. She slipped into the shower taking some extra time to lather her body and clean herself up. Upon exiting the shower she felt more refreshed, her eyes less puffy and skin less dull. She slipped into an old T-shirt and some underwear before walking to her room and sat on the edge of her bed looking at the empty spot next to her.

She slipped under the covers turning off her light and turning on her side to observe the side of her that held Rogers body but now void of anything. The moonlight just slightly cascaded in through the window illuminating and emphasizing the void that haunted the space beside her. She lost sleep every night with a mind that refused to let go and imagining what life would have been like had things turned out differently.

She couldn’t help but pass the thought that maybe, just maybe, he was thinking of her too.

But If you loved me

Why did you leave me

Not a day went by that Roger didn’t think of (Y/N), he knew that her leaving was his fault but he couldn’t help but think that she would burst through those doors with a boisterous laugh and a story of how her day at work was.

He could still remember her voice so clearly as though you were still in the room with him. Roger wished she’d never let him go, he wished he’d fought harder to keep her, but he knew that it was not fair to blame her for his own issues.

Roger eventually walked to the kitchen and looked at the phone, his mind was deep in thought before he dialed a number.

Cause you brought out the best of me

A part of me I'd never seen

You took my soul wiped it clean

Our love was made for movie screens

“Roger!” (Y/N) yelled as she ran into Rogers arms following her arrival into the studio.

“Hello love.” Roger said smiling back at her giving her a peck on the top of your head as the other boys laughed at the two of you.Roger let go as you walked over to Freddie giving him a nudge on the shoulder before being pulled into a hug.

“How are you darling?” He said pulling up your hand emphasizing the new ring on your finger.“I’ve never been better Fred.” She said softly with nothing but happiness behind her statement

“You’re the only girl I’d ever seen that brought out the best in Roger, I’m so happy he found you (Y/N).” Freddie said with a smile as the rest of the boys caught on giving you each a congrats and hug.

To find somebody

I'll find somebody

The phone rang and rang, finally Brian answered.

“What are you doing tonight?” He asked with the intent to block out anything in his mind.

~

(Y/N) had finally gotten the courage to call Freddie on the phone after several weeks, he answered almost immediately.

“Love I’ve been waiting for this call, I knew you needed your time.” He said, you could hear the empathetic tone in his voice.

“May I ask? Roger has refused to tell me anything.” He murmured almost fearful of the result. She knew what he was hinting at, you hadn’t told anyone as to why you and roger called it quits and obviously he had the same idea.

You gave a small painful laugh, “One day, I was the love of his life, the next I wasn’t. Crazy how quickly feelings can change, but you can do nothing but accept what comes at you.” You said sadness in your voice.

“Come out with me tonight, you need some fun,” Freddie said a soft tone in his voice. “I promise you won’t regret it.”

~

Roger sat at the bar ordering a pint, as Brian excused himself to talk to someone in the pub when he feels a presence next to him.

He turns to see the long hair he could recognize in an instant and a lovely dress he’d never thought he’d see again. A sad smile appeared on the girls lips.

“It’s nice to see you stranger.”

[serenagaywaterford]

i’m getting a little anxious about s3. and not in a good way.  (don’t worry. i’m not talking about tuello/serena again.)

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

mostly cos there’s that article that confirmed basically what we already sorta knew: that june is gonna be at lawrence’s as his handmaid. (so at least no more ceremony rape which is nice.)

but forgive me... but i’m pessimistic about the fracturing of the main cast. that never really works well? and we’ve already seen how tht handles it. (not well lol)

now we have june, serena, nick, janine, and moira all in different places with divergent stories. (we know emily and nichole will join up with moira, luke, and erin. and likely sylvia and oliver. so there’s a whole canada crew.) i mean janine has never been a core player but she’s fairly important. and rita... will... likely go with the waterfords wherever they go.

but without june at the waterfords, she’s separated from serena, fred, nick, and janine all in one swoop. (but then of course the waterfords burns down so lol)

now, things i’m really not interested in which i feel are going to take up a lot of time because of this fractured cast:

- serena and fred’s failing relationship. call me biased but i honestly don’t give a shit. i don’t care about fred’s feelings in any way whatsoever. i don’t care about him being sad. or angry. or anything. i simply do not care about him. he needs to die this season. him being upset at his wife who hates him now is so dull. i love serena, i care about what is happening with her character but fred is an accessory to that, not the centre of it. i know there has to be something about him cos he’s tied to serena’s character in many ways, but i’m not here for Poor Fred’s Sad Times Manpain.

- nick being in the army or whatever. i just don’t think he’s a strong enough actor or character to carry scenes by himself. it only worked cos he was playing opposite powerhitters like moss, fiennes, and strahovski (even sweeney). without them to carry the scenes, i fear i’m gonna be bored af. even as a character, he’s just... not that interesting. sorry. the show has managed to actually strip the book character of his moderate complexity and made him into some flat love-interest cliche. who magically survives every treasonous thing he does. so for him to suddenly be a tough guy who is commanding a guardian regiment is fucking laughable. just plain batty. thus, because it’s so nonsensical, it bores me. nick, just in general, bores the fuck outta me on a good day. i dread s3 scenes with him. how nick isn’t fucking DEAD by now for all the shit he’s pulled on waterford it��s bonkers. at the very least, as an eye he should have been removed from that assignment. but i digress. yawn.

- lawrence/june stand-offs or lessons or whatever they wanna frame them as. “he’s testing her”. UGH. i mean, i don’t mind some of it (and apparently they’re gonna partner up)... but i really will be bored when every scene of her in a household is just a showdown of some kind with lawrence. quite frankly, again, maybe i’m just a misandrist but i give zero shits about lawrence either. i don’t wanna her about his pathetic man-struggles and his humanity. i don’t care about his regrets. 

here’s how it goes: i do not care about the men. period. like, there’s no mystery about why men do what they do. there’s no complexity. their stories like this have been told 6,203,009,484,836,334 times already in fiction. we see them in our history books over and over. there have been a million psychological treatises on why nazi men did what they did. why lawrence went along with it, why he continued it, what his contribution was, etc. etc. --- i. do. not. care. i really don’t care about him teaching june the trolley problem or whatever the point is. if the general audience is that lacking in ethical philosophy they need to be taught this, maybe this show is too much already. i also am not here for him using this to excuse his fascism. so, basically, my issue is i don’t care about lawrence. i’ve heard his story a 100 times already. 101 isn’t gonna make it somehow mind-blowing. or even interesting to me...

- lawrence flashbacks will be the death of me, and not in a fun good way. do not show me them. do not waste my precious fucking time on this loser dickhead.

- luke... well, i do sorta care about how the refugees are doing. mostly cos the show has handled it SO BADLY THUS FAR. they made it look super easy and just. no. their canada-side of things has been shit and completely bogus unrealistic. (but then i suspect atwood is partly to blame for that lol.) but i mean, the last thing i need is another full episode dedicated to woobie luke’s woes.

- basically, i give no shits about manpain in this show. none. every second of manpain is a second that a woman’s story is sidelined.

so, my issue with the set up is that when you separate the core characters, they all become strangely boring. what is interesting is their dynamics. and the fact that unless you are june, your story is really thrown to the wayside if you’re removed from her. look how they treated moira last season. and luke. even emily to some degree (but not nearly as badly as moira). she got fuck all to really do or be. luke, even worse. (not that i’m really complaining about that tbh.) emily and janine’s colonies subplots were hack jobs just to show what a colony is. 

now, fair play, i am 100% biased but the only character other than june that comes close to being able to carry a whole, complex story solo is serena. (hello 209). which, ofc, i’m not opposed to. but again, there is something missing in her narrative when she’s isolated from june for too long. 

moira could, if they’d let her. but so far they’ve squandered wiley’s talents and moira’s potential.

it’s sorta exactly because of how they’ve dealt with moira that i fear what will happen when they pull apart the main cast to this degree. yes, it’s the handmaid’s tale. yes, the book was a june solo story. but the show itself has always showed itself to be about other handmaid’s and women in general, almost as much. and how all these women interact. 

the thing is, the show is already treading dangerously into the ridiculous with half these characters even still being alive (june, janine, nick, emily), so it would take a shitload of magic for them to all stay together in one place. and when you pull them apart, it takes some magical deus ex machina shit to put them all back in the same place (hence that weird baptism thing when absolutely insanely they allow janine and the putnams in the same room lmao. plus june, serena, fred, aunt lydia... like yeah right. why doesn’t nick just show up too? hell, moira could stop in for a bite too. why not. nothing matters anymore.)

i dunno. maybe i’m just really cynical and pessimistic... but i don’t like the way it feels. pulling one character out is one thing. having two separate groups of different sides of the border is one thing. having every main character in their own story world is quite another. either the writers actually know what they’re doing after fucking moira & co. over last season, or it’s gonna be a rehash of that and we’re gonna be left with a lot of unsatisfactory, half-baked independent narrative arcs that don’t really weave back into each other in any sensible way.

on a completely separate level, i’m anxious cos of what they’re turning june into.

if the articles are to be believed, they’re making june become... some sort of rebel leader, loose with morality.

“You have to fight fire with fire,” Moss teases. “That’s become [June’s] journey in season 3. To fight against the people she has to fight, she has to become more like them.” Adds Miller: “We’re not doing a montage of June being radicalized — it’s 13 episodes. To see someone go through this process of becoming ruthless was a real challenge. We didn’t want to sensationalize it, or make it too morally easy, either.”

*sigh*

part of what i liked about june was that no matter how awful people were, she was always* very present and empathetic, and yeah she made stupid decisions, was selfish and narrow-minded at times, but inherently a GOOD--if flawed--character. i don’t wanna see serena 2.0. we have a serena, thanks, and she’s a bad person and the whole point is we want her to become a better person, not make june become a worse person to fit in with her lol. i don’t mind june harnessing some of that grit and power and cutthroat attitude, but serena is one of the weakest people and emulating her isn’t the best idea? am i crazy? i especially don’t need to see june turn into lawrence’s rebellious protege.

i dunno... it bothers me when every story about women ends up with “well they have to be more like men! that’s real power!!” (and i’m side-eyeing the male showrunner and male writers so fucking hard rn.) i’m not naive. i know some change is necessary, and to fight such a perverse system you have to infiltrate it, violently fight against it, and understand it. but you don’t need to become it. or again, maybe i’m just naive?

I DO NOT WANT “RUTHLESS JUNE��.

i’m sorry. i don’t. do some ruthless things, yes, that’s probably inevitable but to become a ruthless person? yikes. how has gilead not won then? it seems it has.

(*with the exception of eden. don’t even get me started...)

maybe i just need a cup of chamomile tea and to shut the fuck up until i actually watch it.

[craftedcoils-blog-blog]

A Room With A View

Not only is the floor hard but its covered in wires.  The empty cigarette packs make a nice cushion if they're in the right position.  Theres a vent high above me that almost touches the cement ceiling but stops short.  I like to look at it like it's some bond villain; more powerful than the wall but not quite as collected and austere as the ceiling.  Like it's waiting at the bus terminal with a bomb.  Waiting for a certain bus with a certain passenger but is to distracted by it's own motive and doesn't read the right sign and ends up missing the bus because he isn't sure which passenger is on which bus.  Always he misses the bus.  Will always miss the bus.  Theres no two ways about it.  

There are pipes.  One is in a perpendicular erection to the wall but straight forward like the penis had a muzzled dog nose.  Another pipe behind it, thicker and spray painted for some reason, was burrowed into a drywall box in one corner on one end and painted the same color as the drywall box in the opposite corner.  This is weird to me.  Fucking weird.  Like an ironic mistake.   It occurs to me that I have to think about these things if I ever want to fall asleep.  Especially in this place.   Unless I am comfortable, my mind will devour me and I will eat reality like I'm starving and it's a delicious hamburger, until the daydream becomes a nightmare and I become comfortable because I have picked certain things out to help occupy my brain with meaningless information.  It has to be this way.  Things have to bear absolutely no importance on my waking life, it has to be random, arbitrary, stupid…otherwise my mind will eat it up and I cannot handle the digestion because my metabolism is too quick.  And insatiable, never filled, always hungry.  Like there is a tunnel inside of the mind and at the end is a slight glimmer of something you can barely touch and despite how much you want it and how obsessed you become with it, it just becomes a part of your dream or twisted nightmare.  And then you fall asleep.  

I have been in this room for an indeterminable amount of time.  Its part of an experiment, I have agreed to.  I cannot leave, it is part of the experiment, and if I do, everything will fall apart somehow and I will loose what I have been trying to obtain and in one fell swoop become exposed again to the fucked up world outside and my mind, the frailest of organs, will once again become diluted by society.  It will give me information that I do not need or want and it will reduce me proper.  Like vermiculite to soil, like sand, like the croppings of beetle wings, sawdust and basil that, in some mad scientist's version of  an antidote to some disease I do not have, is somehow connected to the panacea that I need but can never bring myself to ask for.  

I have a friend that comes by and brings me things.  Survival elements;  Food, beer and cigarettes mostly.  The later two without question, the former can momentarily be substituted by meditation and further drinking.  The food is usually dim sum.  I didn't ask for it but I don't really care.  I'll eat shoelaces when Im drunk and the MSG makes me feel like i'm sparkles and helps me sleep so I go with it.  Sometimes he brings me trinkets which I usually throw into a corner somewhere but then rearrange them quickly if I know he's coming to establish a perception that maybe I am ministering these stupid items as if they mean something to me.  Maybe they should.  I just don't seem to care.  My friend's name is Fred.

Sometimes Fred comes by, and for reasons I can only explain to myself, I can tell he is afraid.  Maybe it's the awkward look on his face and the darting glances that shoot out like an estranged chrysalis atop an asparagus high on lightning and forcing itself into every conceived corner of non-space, but it frightens me back actually, seeing a human being so offensively perturbed by another.  Or maybe its not me he is afraid of and if its not then that scares me even more.  I guess it's a sort of symbiosis that we have.  A collaboration in fear.  

I hate to say it, perhaps because I rely on him so much and have known him for so long but, sometimes I sense something almost sinister in Fred.  A betrayal;  but not from him in particular.  He is a good person, I can sense it.  I wouldn't have begun this whole thing if he weren't.  But I feel as if he is some kind of a henchman, perhaps even for this whole situation, this weird experiment that we have agreed to.  In the beginning it was more jovial, I had it under control, or at least I thought I did and that was good enough to keep me happy or whatever.  But at this juncture I am no longer sure who is in control of what or if there is any control to be had at all.  Sometimes its like I have become not mine or Fred's but some other force's twisted experiment.  Like I am a prisoner.   I think I have to imagine these scenarios because I have no contact with the outside world.  In this scenario I have created I can imagine him driving away from this room in silence as some dark overlord pats him on the back, appearing out of nowhere in the backseat and congratulating him on a job well done.  He resists the accolades because he hates what he has do to but has no say in the matter regardless.  At least this is what I see in his eyes as he hands me the half rack and bags of dim sum and seems to be begging me to be the one to stop all this.  He handles it all like he's fucking poisoning it and I look at him.  I try to tell him that I've poisoned myself and that he has nothing to do with it, but my eyes are not so revealing, forgiving.  

Yesterday, I think it must have been, I wrote a a small bit about altruism on the wall next to a strange hole that only goes as deep as my longest finger will allow.  I think I love this hole.  I don't understand it, and it makes as little sense to me as a monkey on a tugboat, but I don't seem to want to know why or how this hole is here either.  I just want to love it as it is.  It is a beautiful thing when you can choose not to care about what you love because you know it just is and will always be what you think you love.  But I wrote this thing on the wall and I was thinking that it doesn't matter if you do nice things at all.  Assholes do nice things all the time.  I think you have to be afraid to be an asshole.  Fear is the overlooked cousin of empathy but balancing fear and empathy is too difficult for most of us to imagine.  Fear makes you sensitive and through the introspection that is created through your own knowledge of it you become empathetic.   False confidence does not breed sensitivity, that much I am sure of.  The gift shop is what we cant help but expose to the rest of the world.  The gallery is what we have inside that people are constantly trying to figure out.  I used to think that I was a nice person until I realized that having these kind of thoughts make me an asshole.  

Anyways, I have to let myself breath sometime and sometimes I miss people because, despite all their annoying faults and beautiful problems, they are at least interesting.  I miss being downtown and looking at some random guy 's head lesion after I establish eye contact and then they look away right before I do.  I miss catching a fearful glance from someone dressed in a halloween costume that is slightly more outgoing than their comfort can allow. I miss sitting awkwardly in a stairwell with a cigarette, watching the people go up and down wondering if it's normal or not.  I miss the mystery of whether or not  things are normal because right now I have no idea.  I guess I need that self proclaimed vindication.  I need some kind of reference point, I need something to see so that I can at least see through it.  In this room I cannot bring myself to see anything let alone see through anything.  The only faults I can identify are my own and they have no reference.  I guess the only thing you can actually see through is yourself and once you pass through that and into the other room all there is are one way mirrors.  

I miss little interactions with people that don't matter.  People that don't matter say the most interesting things because they don't care and they don't care because no one has ever cared about them.  Their thoughts are only their own.  I miss the homeless superheroes, riding that electric rainbow into foreverness.  I miss talking about things that I don"t give a shit about just for my own therapy.  I miss calculating the time it takes for grocery clerks to bag your groceries.  Some of them are really good, but i'll never tell them.  I guess I just miss slipping on the slime that coats the city.  It has a strange cushion when you fall.  It's like a lillypad, you might fall in but you can't expect anything.  In this room I have my shoes in a small duffle bag in the corner and all I use are flip-flops.

What I don't miss is the planing and strategy that comes along with interacting with society,  contorting my face and personality to match an assumed perception of some female, hobgoblin or whatnot that I see on the bus, looking off with squinted eyes and lips pursed like an asshole.  Im definitely an asshole, at this point i've relaxed to this fact.  I don't really miss sex all that much.  At least not as much as I miss talking to women and kissing their faces.  I masturbate about once every 4 hours but I don't have a clock in here.  There's also that thing that happens when your talking to people and you weigh their personality and react to them accordingly.  People will tell you they don't do this but they all definitely do, its just that some people are not very self aware or too much so, at this point i cant really tell.  I do miss friendship.  And I miss being a brother.

I can tell my friend is here again because I can hear the estranged echo of footsteps and the rustling of plastic bags and him typing in the code onto the keypad on the door.  You have to press the buttons in very firmly otherwise it takes forever and it's no longer a secret.  I have given him the privilege of coming in unannounced because I feel it gives me a very small amount of spontaneity that i think is important.  I hear him keying in the code and my brain has to immediately shift from private to social in 3-5 seconds.  I think that humans need this shift to survive.  When you pull them out into the world it is overwhelming.  They are in a constant state of trying to understand the private recesses of their mind's while spontaneously interacting with others in the process.  Thats why society is schizophrenic.  Why do children learn to talk?  Because everyone else is doing it, and so I have arranged for the lowest possible amount of this.  Learn to react immediately.  

I have one bucket in the corner in which I pee and shit the massive amounts of MSG I consume.  I cover it with seran wrap.  It may not be the best system but I'm too lazy to think of anything else.  I'm not Alan fucking Turing.  I've told Fred not to give me any advice and to overlook any discrepancy that he may see in my behavior while i'm in here.  I have directed him to abandon any formula for this scenario that he may construct and I tell him to shut up and I am still learning to do the same:  Any mistakes I may make in this eternity are my own to live with and thats the way I've decided it should go.  

Sometimes I want to talk to Fred about the world.  This is not one of those times but sometimes I do.  I occasionally want to engage with him about the ticks and tocks of life out there.  But I have expressed very clearly that he is not to speak to me about anything other than what may be happening in this room.  There's something about this that I don't think he likes.  

The list of items I have in this room are as follows:  a tiny glockenspiel that I hammer out rhythms with, a recording interface, two microphones, two speakers, a children sized drum set, 37 books of empty college ruled paper piled up in the corner and 3 scattered about the room with diametric scribblings and esoteric remarks on random pages about divinity, 20 30 paged books of staff paper untouched, a USB keyboard, a Bob Hope marionette I bought from a Ukrainian gypsy on 4th ave in Olympia, 3 firewire cables, 7 xlr cables, a pair of colorful boots, an amplifier and 3 foot switches.  

I have acquired the habit of marking, with a ball point pen, all of the spots where I bruised, cut or hurt myself.  For example, I fell onto a cymbal stand the other day and now my shoulder is in considerable pain.  I think i'll keep re-marking it until it goes away.  At least I can reach it.  At least I can diagnose the problem.  I feel as if this calculated procedure will help in identifying things about myself that would otherwise go unnoticed.  At least the parts of myself that I can reach.  If I am not becoming a robot, than I am coming close to being one.  As if thought were just an amalgam of circumstance.  My environment is finite, like a local bar where you are a regular.  You keep thinking you are going to experience something different with each day, but nothing ever changes.  You go in, expecting to find that one thing that tells you that you are alive and not just a machine, but it never comes.  You are the same person you were yesterday, and the day before, and you can never expect anything different.  You can never expect life to be something that it isn't because then it never will.  You will always be seeing past life instead of through it.  Your frustration of what is not happening will shadow reality and make you a non-entity, a husk of what was once a human.  But then you wake up for some reason in the middle of the night and go outside, because this is where you think life happens.

[lostinafictionaluniverse]

Riverdale 1 X 08 thoughts

Things that struck me during the episode, in no real order

- Juggie’s narrative calling Cooper’s the Stepfords of Riverdale, Alice being controlling even during the family portrait - boy, she never lets up does she?

- Juggie at Pop’s with Jason and Polly (Is that some kind of clue? Like he knows more than we think? And that he’s everywhere, just blending in with the background, apparently) This may become dangerous for him as he may witness/ hear something he’s not supposed to, that could make him a threat to the murderer? 

- Jason was supposed to deliver the drugs to an address upstate. Will this come into play ever? Is this the person FP is role-playing for? And is the jacket his collateral to use against the guy? 

- The ring went up in flames? Nah! I’m sure the ring has some role to play, Nana Blossom brought it up in ep 5 and now Polly is all broken up over it. It’ll show up, rings don’t get burned anyway. Maybe Jason stashed it in his jacket?

-  Juggie saying to Archie “you accidentally keep killing me” troubled me a lot, I think its foreshadowing for betrayal by Archie. Quotes Sartre, then brings up the Gordian knot. And his roommate/BFF/Bro doesn’t know who Dylan is. How are they friends again?

- Fred acknowledging that the drive-in meant a lot to Juggie was seriously so great!  

- Veronica talking about her elite lifestyle being invited to Oscar parties and Kevin getting starry eyed. And then about Hermione’s shoes as well. Kevin is a total fangirl.

- BETTY”S BOYFRIEND! There it’s finally said, signed, sealed and delivered!

- Archie’s expression was telling. NOPE Archie! And WTF, I noticed much later (thanks to some gifs) that Val was sitting right there beside him. This seems like a recurring theme with Archie. Sigh!

- Mama Cooper not pleased with Ronnie but Ronnie looking on like a proud mama bear when Betty stands up to her mom! I love supportive Beronica

- Polly asks for Penelope to be there at the shower. Something tells me Polly going to the Blossoms is a carefully laid out plan. But for what? Does she suspect they may have offed Jason and wants to find a few clues herself? Maybe Jason told her about something at his place and she wants to do some sleuthing of her own? Incredibly foolish of her if that’s the case. She should be thinking of her baby/ies. Okay, I had an afterthought. Polly was in the book with Jason. What if all Polly’s been telling them has been a lie, and is playing a long con? I don’t know what exactly, but it started out with Jason playing her. What if he never stopped and then she started playing him? Idk, I’m overthinking

- Fred confronting Clifford Blossom was ballsy or stupid or both. He had no plan, in fact, he was very Archie-like in his approach. Impulsive, and not practical which is a side to Fred that we haven’t really seen. So Clifford wanted to buy the drive-in and here comes the Maple Syrup reference for this episode! This is more ludicrous than Nana Blossom’s sex-predicting talisman!  

- Archie and his friends pitching in to help. Who in the heck was the fourth guy asking Kevin to join the football team? And biggest mystery - why no retort from Juggie at the “Some of us are bruiser studs” quip from Moose?? Missed opportunity for more Juggiesque witticisms.

- Archie and Juggie conversation, Archie is seriously someone without any sensitivity. I think he’s not a bad guy, he’s just not empathetic and sensitive to other people. It’s clear that he’s impulsive, he’s also self-involved though he can see the light, he needs it spelled out for him. And then there are those surprisingly mature moments like the one where he tells Fred he has to protect his legacy. But those are like lightning flashes, they quickly come and go.

-He jumps to blame Sheriff Keller, he brushes off Val’s advice and her plea to talk to her and just walks out of the room!  Impulsive. Brash. What was he even thinking going up to the bar and seeking out those Serpents? He would’ve gotten his ass kicked if it wasn’t for FP. 

-Listen to Juggie, Arch. And Betty too. They told him the Serpents were dangerous! What even are you thinking walking into that bar with your bright yellow Letterman jacket and picking a fight? Ronnie switching off at ‘construction’ and ‘site’ is so Ronnie

BTW, who are the Bulldogs? A rival biker/ drug dealing gang?

FP saves the day! (MUSTANG!! ) The dynamic between FP and Fred and wait - did Fred say you’re a Serpent again? Does that mean he’s been in and out of the gang? Perhaps he went straight for a while? And how long has he been an alcoholic? Has Juggie never had a normal family? Is that why he never brought his friends home? That could explain why his dad doesn’t know of Betty though it breaks my heart on a whole different level. 

- I liked the conversation between Hermione and Alice. I’m so eager to see more of the dynamic between the parents and how they knew each other. Jughead described Hal and Alice as high school sweethearts, so maybe the theory of Alice having been in love with Fred or FP falls apart. Then again maybe not, since Juggie may not have all the facts, except what Betty may have told him about her parents.

- The baby shower itself was a disaster except for 

’Our House’

Bughead kiss

‘Totally on my bucket list’

‘Nana Rose has dementia and gypsy blood’

‘Let’s find you a nice spot beside the food table’

‘This is occultism at its most ludicrous’

I’m so here for Alice- Penelope trading insults. Madchen is awesome, and Natalie does great too in her cool and bitchy Mama Blossom avatar

- Polly’s breakdown seemed real, but idk why I feel she’s playing everyone?

- Archie the impulsive airhead makes an entrance and Juggie’s face! Oh God! The way he looks at Betty! Kill me now

Sidenote: I think KJ does a better job at Angry/pissed off Archie scenes than any other. 

- Alice finding out about the ‘appointment’ Hal made for Polly to fix her ‘mistake’ - euphemisms abound! Truly this episode belonged to Madchen!

--Betty getting to meet her future FIL officially! Yayy! FP lied at first about Jason and then told them that he’s been running drugs. Juggie’s look of disappointment to discover that his dad is a drug dealer after all! (DAMN, he didn’t know, the poor boy was shocked when Betty told him Jason was running drugs for the Serpents! Oh the betrayal- I’m crying - fuck you, FP)

- ‘Its the DARK AGES, dad’

- He still believes his dad - because (and Skeet killed it, he’s just so effective)

- THE BUGHEAD KISS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The light, the open mouths, the face holding, her smile, the everything!!! I’m deader than dead

- Shit, Joaquin was playing Kevin all this while, but perhaps he likes him too?? I know this is a classic trope but WTH I ship it!

- FP saying ‘We all have a role to play, including me’ and then reaching for that beer. Does he mean he’s pretending to be an alcoholic? For some reason?? To protect his family cos he doesn’t want them to be with him, because he’s playing a dangerous game and they might get hurt?

- My theory is FP knows who offed Jason and the jacket is security for him against them (to use as blackmail) and also against Keller ( to whom he can offer it as evidence in return for immunity) Smart! I can see where Juggie gets his intelligence from!

- Juggie and Archie - bro moment. Archie hesitating (almost blushing) before he made that bro whisper was pretty cute actually. Jug had no such hesitation. But before, when they were making up after the Grundy fallout, it was Jug who didn’t want to hug in front of the whole town. I’m thinking his relationship with Betty is changing him, making him more open, less afraid.

- Polly, O Polly what are you upto? Its clear you have no love lost for the Blossoms. How can you think you’d be safer there than in your own home? After knowing Alice kicked Hal out? I think there’s something deeper going on here. That creepy look Clifford gives Penelope as he ushers Polly in? BRRRRR, gave me chills!

- Alice breaking down in Betty’s arms - slow claps for Madchen!!!!

[swearronchanel]

Am I making this a thing too often? Oh well, I HAVE THOUGHTS IM SORRY

Series 6 is finally here & the first episode was pretty intense so I’m watching it again & I guess just posting my thoughts that no one actually asked for 

- COLOR! Or COLOUR, either way new intro 

- Ok I actually really like this, time are changing #LetsGetIt1962 

- Shelagh and Angela omg, Tim shaving! Cute Turner Morning but now that I’ve seen this once, this could’ve been a chance to show Shelagh having morning sickness 

 - Sister MJ dancing is the cutest thing

 - welp here comes Sister Ursula ready to ruin everything. If she wants to “gyrate” let her wtf 

- Patsy fixing Delia’s hair is cute but let’s be real Patsy’s needs the fixing - Ugh again Sister U, go away

 - welcome home fam, it’s about to get real

 - I miss my bby Trixie but I’m not going to dwell on it because I know she’ll be back - like the minimal food isn’t even the worst of it, just get ready. *** ALSO, Sister Ursula is lowkey petty with that line “don’t sit down yet please, the mother house will be calling soon” She’s knows what’s about to go down and is enjoying it. 

 - Sister Julienne’s voice cracking, she looks so sad. My heart. Why would she be demoted?! I still don’t get it. 

 - * Awkward clapping *

 - So did Patrick not notice Shelagh was constantly sick and carrying around those rennies? 

 - “Biscuits are for fainters”, which is funny because she tells Mickey later on to go with her and find the biscuit tin. 

 - No Patrick we’re not having a raffle lol 

- “We’re taking a gamble is you ask me” Shelagh’s accent sounds so cute in an serious tone haha 

- Sister MJ’s little angry moment with the duster, I feel. 

- Can we see sister MJ with Angela please? - Why does Mickey need a patch for astigmatism? My brother has it in one eye and always just wore regular glasses. I feel the glasses struggle though, I love my frames but I hate wearing them. Okay off track whoops - 

 - I knew the husband(Lester) wasn’t to be trusted from the get. - - WHERE DID SHE TAKE THE DAMN TV? 

- aw Tom. 

 - That’s all lol. I don’t know why this ring story isn’t that appealing to me? kinda boring 

 - PATSY IN JEANS YES, HERE FOR THE NEW WARDROBES 

 - Also all the cocktails, I love it. Barbara was some “practice” haha. Patsy’s toast was cute  

 - That random guy telling Phyllis “give us all a thrill” and she cringed. That’s me  

- Lol @ Barbara’s Zsa Zsa Gabor reference but she just died so RIP - - I wanna knock Lester tf out 

- This is period drama indeed but sadly, this is not an issue of the past. - 

 - Everyone feels bad for Sister J 

 - “No I can’t prescribe, because I’m only 15!” 😂😂 I’m dead. - I wish he would get more screentime haha. I’m almost hoping he’ll feel weird about the new baby so he can have some kind of interesting storyline 

- Sister W’s face telling Tim “comb your hair”, why does she make the funniest faces - “Cape Town Tummy” lol if that’s what you wanna call it 

 - Thank the climate appropriate bri-nylon for Baby Turner - Can Patrick please make a joke about it? Like Fred can squeeze his wife’s ass, let Patrick at least have a good line 

 - “Is it both ends?” wtf sister W😂 why would you ask?

 - Shelagh’s so polite “the smallest room haha" 

 - IM LAUGHING BUT CRINGING AT SISTER WINIFRED’S FACE I LOVE IT - 

- Lol here’s freco Fred 

 - Why does it even matter if Barbara has a ring to show off Violet, we didn’t see yours lol - 

 - Oh no he’s taking Mickey right 

 - Shit yes he is, WHYY - this kid is so precious omg 

 - Why would he tell is son this 

 - THIS STRESSES ME OUT UGH I KNOW WHATS GONNA HAPPEN

 - Coño this man pisses me off 

 - Mickey 😪 

- Damn it Peter why do you always have bad news - 

 - "Television kills the conversation” no you kill the conversation 

 - PHYLLIS’S REACTION IS GOLD

 - what are Patsy and Delia doing? 

 - YES LESTER YOU’RE A DISGUSTING COWARD, I WISH I COULD PERSONALLY HURT YOU 

 - my heart hurts but I’m also furious 

- lol babs with pottery is symbolism of me handling university

 - Why was this relevant though, that could’ve been another Shelagh scene 

- Yes Trudy with the knife. So strong. I’m here for her 

 - HOW DARE SISTER U QUESTION SISTER MC’S FAITH 

 - YOU DONT EVEN KNOW HER 

- Trudy really walked her way over like that’s incredible, she just was hit so hard. 

 - YES SISTER JULIENNE 

 - I can’t wait till she storms out again bc that was empowering, forget that vow of obedience for a second 

 - I don’t even care the Sister U is nice to Mickey, it’s too late for redemption I know what you say later to Dr Turner and it cancels out  

- MUCAS EXTRACTOR 

 - Shelagh’s best at that  

 - Why was there no scene showing Mickey at the Turners !!? That would’ve been precious 

 - Phyllis 💔 I freaking love her. Especially her with Trudy at the end 

- “You contradicted my authority last night” YES TF SHE DID IM PROUD 

- YES SHE LEFT, NONNATUS IS STILL YOURS SISTER J 

 - SOMEONE GIF THAT JACKET PART  

 - Yes Trudy. She played this so well 

- I wish I cared more about Barbara and Tom

 - They’re cute but idk I just don’t care enough. The ring part at the end is cute because who cares about convention I’m here for that.  

 - Oh no this is the part right 

-  shoot yea it is. Sister Mary Cynthia 😪 

 - PATRICK SHOULDVE PUNCHED HIM 

- sister J not forcing her way in, I’m glad 

- Sister MJ 💔 my freaking heart is shattering 

 - Give Bryony an award for this 

 - Such a heartbreaking, accurate yet beautifully performed depiction of mental illness 

 - THE GROUP HUG, THIS IS WHERE THE TEARS STARTED  

 - AYE COÑO SISTER J AND SHELAGH 

- THIS IS WHERE I LOST IT THE FIRST TIME, RIGHT AFTER “IM SO AFRAID” - I’m going to insert a picture because I’m serious I was sobbing 

 - Shelagh’s skirt is so pretty 

- I’m here for her outfit, lets get it 1962 

- Okay let me press play and cry again  

 - Give Laura an award for everything - HER FACIAL EXPRESSIONS, HER ACTING, SHE’S SO AMAZING 

 - Ah damn I’m crying again 

- Sister J “I never stopped praying” omg💔 

- I’m so glad she told her first. 

- Why is Trudy’s mom a bitch? Wtf care about your daughter and grand kids? 

- SNARKY PHYLLIS

 - what’s this bs. 

- YOU DONT BLAME A VICTIM 

 - I HATE HER MOM 

- PHYLLIS BACK HER UP - 

 - Patrick is so empathetic and understanding because he legit was on the other side 

- “That means you can be healed" 

- YES YOU CAN BE HEALED 💕 

- If Patsy is in the next episode they should’ve just brought her problem with her dad for the next episode? Since this episode does seem jammed packed but it’s all good

 - PHYLLIS AGGRESSIVELY MAKING A COCKTAIL IS ME 

 - except I’m a poor university student so it’s no cocktail 

- Phyllis knows something’s up looking at Pats acting weird w/ Delia 

  - Patrick suggesting Northfield. That’s character growth 

 - GET SISTER U OUT OF HERE 

 - PHYLLIS HANGING UP THE PHONE TO SET PETER STRAIGHT REAL QUICK 

- Patsy and Delia having a cute moment. I think everyone wants a significant other like Delia? Like Patsy always shuts her out when something happens but Delia doesn’t leave

 - Does Patsy’s dad have Lou Gehrig’s disease or what’s it really called - oh ALS? 

- Here come the rest of the feels. Phyllis is amazing, Trudy is amazing. I just love this freaking show. Phyllis never judges and truly helps and I just need her to give me a hug and tell me it’ll be alright - I do like this part. Good for you Babs. Defy convention, it’s 1962. 

 - So much more diversity in the community centre I love it 💕 

- Can we get a Latino/Hispanic family story on here please Heidi

 - ANGELA IS SO CUTE AH 

- THEY’RE DRAWING YES 

- I’m so glad for Trudy 

 - THE PARALLEL 

 - "Patrick you gave me a note once..” *internally screaming* 

- I forgot Shelagh can draw 

 - “PLEASE WILL YOU BE MY DAD” AW MY HEARTTTT 

- but honestly though Patrick should’ve been freaking out with more excitement like it’s a legit miracle 

- MY BBYS ARE HAVING A BABY 

 - Doesn’t matter that was perfect for me, I love parallels it’s so cool 

 - PHYLLIS WAVING BYE AWW And Vanessa Redgrave’s outro And the end. Wow what an episode, ready for next week 

[mdye]

“I don’t think [Trump is] an honest person — but I do think he’s an authentic person. I think that that’s what the Democratic Party needs.”

Seth Meyers is one of television’s best political comics.

As host of NBC’s Late Night with Seth Meyers, he is persuasive because as well as being very funny, he is sincere and empathetic. As critical as he is of Trumpism, he has tried hard to understand Trump voters’ perspectives, as on the night after Trump’s election.

“I felt a lot of emotions last night and into today,” Meyers said in an emotional speech that went viral.

He held back tears as he discussed his and his mother’s disappointment: “Some sadness, some anger, some fear. But I’m also aware that those are the same emotions a lot of Trump supporters felt, emotions that led them to make their choice, and it would be wrong for me to think my emotions are somehow more authentic than their emotions.”

He went on to say that he hoped Trump would drop his worst campaign trail policies, characteristically sharpening his point with humor. “Because when you’re courting someone, you’re always willing to pretend you’re something you’re not. For example, when you first start dating someone, you’ll agree to go apple picking.”

But Meyers, not naïve, finished with a steely promise. “Donald Trump made a lot of promises as to what he’s going to do in the next four years, and now we get to see if he can fulfill them. And so, I’d just like to make one promise to him: We here at Late Night will be watching you.”

Throughout the turbulent first 100 days of the Trump administration, Meyers has been a thorough, incisive critic of Trumpism, especially with his oft-trending A Closer Look feature. Meyers’s weeknight show hits the Trump administration hard across the board: from immigration to health care to corruption.

During a hectic mid-afternoon last week — as the Republicans in the House repealed Obamacare — the 43-year-old joined me over the phone from his office in Manhattan’s 30 Rock. Our discussion, which has been lightly edited and condensed, covered the impact of political news comedy, learnings from Tina Fey and Bernie Sanders, the role of big companies in opposing Trumpism, and his advice for liberals.

Alexander Bisley

My contention is that Trump is a Marxist, as in (Chico as) Groucho Marx’s line: “Who are you going to believe, me or your own lying eyes?” As you’ve repeatedly covered on Late Night, Trump contradicts things millions of people saw him say, such as his lies about health care.

Seth Meyers

Yeah. It’s been fascinating for us how inexhaustible his contradictions are. I guess we shouldn’t be surprised. I think one thing that’s really important and has been true throughout history is that 70-year-old men don’t tend to change or go through any sort of metamorphosis into a different kind of person. So I think it was a false hope that many had that somehow the presidency would change the man. But more often than not I think the man changes the presidency, and that’s certainly what we’ve seen thus far.

Alexander Bisley

“[Trump] believes truly insane, deranged, and delusional things,” Chris Hayes told me. “It’s very much an Infowars presidency in many ways. The president is a conspiracy theorist.” What do you think?

Seth Meyers

Well, I have a sense that for someone like [Infowars founder] Alex Jones, there’s a great amount of theater to it, and he probably has far more understanding of how insane the things he is saying are. His reason for saying that is not at its core insane, he’s saying insane things for the purpose of theater. There’s some craft behind it; there’s some thought behind it.

I don’t know if Donald Trump thinks to himself: “I’m gonna say something insane.” I think he doesn’t think much at all. But he’ll see something or read something, and without backing it up or reading a second source, he’ll tweet basically that he was surveilled by Barack Obama. Which then, because he’s the president, becomes this incredible story with this very long tail that we’re sort of still dealing with today. But it didn’t start because he thought, “Oh, this will be helpful for me if I say something that I know not to be true.” I think he just did it without thinking.

Alexander Bisley

Trumpism has been a boon for political comedians. What is something about a competitor that impresses you?

Seth Meyers

John Oliver laid out in a really wonderful way that audiences have an attention span for longer-form stuff. When we started this show we didn’t think 10, 12-minute pieces on current events would be what our show would be known for. But John was somebody who showed if you get out a lot of information, people have a better attention span for it. And then if you can get enough jokes in there to also make it funny, you have a pretty nice recipe.

Alexander Bisley

Any criticism you’d make of your competition?

Seth Meyers

Oh, God, no. I feel as though this is a really nice time for late night across the board and I’m happy to be one of the people that has the luxury of having one of these shows. I think for all of us, it’s a little strange when people say it’s a good time for you, because it doesn’t particularly feel like a good time. But there are certainly work advantages versus having a president, be they Democrat or Republican, who is conventional. When you have an unconventional president, it creates an incredible volume of material to go through on any given day.

Lloyd Bishop/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images

Alexander Bisley

How do you see the role of political news comedy versus traditional media?

Seth Meyers

One of the nice things about traditional media is that they do have a rule book. Now, I think looking back on the past couple of years, they’ve maybe stepped outside of the lines here or there. But at its core, there are journalistic ethics and journalism is better when people follow it. Comedians are not known for having ethics [laughs], and that’s what makes us better at being able to process information that comes from someone else who doesn’t have ethics. We don’t have to have gloves on and couch anything in the language of journalists. If we think someone’s telling a lie we’re just very happy to come out and say, “As of today, this person is a liar.”

I think I should stress, we can’t do our jobs without journalism; journalists who are doing the hard work and actually getting the information that we use for our comedy.

Alexander Bisley

Can comedy swing swing voters?

Seth Meyers

My takeaway from the last election would be we’re not great at it. And I should say in 2008 when I was at SNL, I feel like SNL got a lot of credit for its impact on that election. But I made sure never to puff my chest out about that either because I feel there are a lot of reasons that people vote. Even in all the data and all the people that have been doing the excellent data work as far as what happened in the most recent election, I think that they said, “Look, there were a lot of different reasons that people voted.” But certainly, nothing is showing up in the data that says “Late Night” on it.

Alexander Bisley

Do you hope for any kind of impact beyond entertaining?

Seth Meyers

Well, the impact is this. I feel as though our show feels a bit more vital and a show that you want to make sure you see, either the night of or the next morning, because it’s about what’s happening in the world. So that allows us to choose the things that we think are important. And hopefully the people who watch our show think they’re important, and that’s why they keep coming back. Ultimately, if you can start conversations or inform people about things that they maybe otherwise might miss over the course of their busy day, that’s about as high as we aim as far as effect, is just getting that information out there.

Alexander Bisley

When you first got into comedy, did you think you’d become a political public intellectual?

Seth Meyers

No I did not. I had no sense of that, and I think if you’d seen my early improv show work you would also have agreed with me [laughs]. I always had an interest in politics; I grew up in New Hampshire so every four years we would have that be a big part of where we lived. But it wasn’t really until I found my way to SNL and the long history of political comedy on that show, I got to be up close to that and I feel I had on the job training. Again it was very interesting for me to do, but it wasn’t where I started from.

Alexander Bisley

Your Documentary Now! and Late Night bandleader colleague Fred Armisen has criticized the humorless Portlandian left. Anything you’d add in that vein?

Seth Meyers

I think that both sides of the political spectrum have some humorless elements to them. But I think as far as criticizing them, it seems rather pointless, because it’s very humorless.

Alexander Bisley

“Reality has a well-known liberal bias,” Stephen Colbert once said. It’s important to be fair, right?

Seth Meyers

Yeah, “fair” is a word we talk about. We talk about “fair” when we talk about “even.” I feel as though “even” can sometimes lead to false equivalents, whereas “fair” is, is this how you’d like to be treated if somebody disagreed with you? We all have bias, we all have a point of view. I think the best you can do is try to be aware of it and try to make sure that the bias doesn’t make you treat someone else unfairly.

Alexander Bisley

Bill Maher told me recently Trump is the Republicans’ “chickens coming home to roost.” Howard Dean added, “I think that’s very accurate. When you feed your base anger and lies, eventually it’ll catch up with the feeder.” What are your thoughts?

Seth Meyers

Certainly I don’t think that Republicans can say, “We could’ve never seen something like this coming.” There was always a bit of realization amongst Republicans — especially Republicans in Congress and other elected officials leading up to the election — of the thing they can’t say that they would like to.

I certainly believe that no matter how badly he behaved they prefer him to Hilary Clinton. And they probably don’t ultimately have any regrets. If they have any regrets it’s probably, “Aw man, it’d be easier to deal with Ted Cruz right now. He understands how the Senate works.” So I think they just hold their noses and try to get as much of their agenda done as possible and hope that he doesn’t press any of the buttons he’s not supposed to press.

Alexander Bisley

Is there a danger in avoiding wider Republican responsibility for Trump and Trumpism?

Seth Meyers

I certainly think there’s a danger in the left not examining the role they played in this election as far as maybe misunderstanding where the rest of America was, as far as what they wanted, come Election Day. I think that things like [now-former FBI Director James] Comey, and I think things like misogyny, I think those all played a role in the election. But ultimately in the next election for all you know something crazy’s going to happen 10 days out that’s not your fault. But how can you control and change the things that were your fault? How can you be better at the things within your control?

I just hope that the Democratic Party looks at that. Because again, some very insane things happened over the course of this election. And I get that when you’re upset about the outcome, it’s very easy to look at things that were unfair and wrong and try to pin it all on that. But if you don’t look again, this is just basic self-improvement, you have to control the things you can control.

Alexander Bisley

America’s a great, big, complicated country. As you have mentioned, there are all sorts of reasons why people might’ve voted for Trump, some of them legitimate. You’ve tried hard to make a distinction between Trump and his supporters. But if Trump supporters keep supporting him, given his disqualifying first 100 days, should you go after them?

Seth Meyers

That’s something we’re keeping our eye on. I think we wanted to give it at least 100 days to see what kind of president he was and see if it had any effect on his supporters. I will say, I think health care will be the most interesting because this now starts to have an effect on Trump voters. I can understand how Trump voters whose lives didn’t improve under Barack Obama could consider voting for Trump.

Hillary Clinton was in a difficult position because she couldn’t really criticize Barack Obama. It was tricky for her to argue how she was going to be different than Barack Obama. It was a very hard thing to do because he was pretty popular when he left. So she was in a tricky box there. I guess my question is for those Trump people — 100 days, 200 days, 300 days in — is if Trump’s not doing anything to help them, will they change their mind?

Alexander Bisley

In 2008, you led the writing of those hilarious and iconic Tina Fey as Sarah Palin SNL segments. What did you learn from working with her?

Seth Meyers

In the very beginning of my time at SNL in 2001, Tina was a head writer. I had been a fan of hers even before then. Tina’s the kind of writer that is never satisfied with the current draft. Always believes that if there’s another 10 minutes before we have to have the final script in, that you can find a better joke. I never saw her without a script in her hand. I think that taught me that writing is not easy and that it’s never really done and you should always be fine-tuning it until the last possible second.

Alexander Bisley

You’re a very savvy interviewer too, unlike some brilliant comedians. Anyone else you’d love to interview?

Seth Meyers

I’ve been saying this recently, that I would really like to talk to Sean Spicer. I think he has the most interesting job in the world right now and I can’t imagine what the approach to it is every day. I can’t imagine that he will ever find the time to come on my show. But I would really like to — at the very least not even for TV — sit down and have a drink with Sean Spicer and ask him a million questions about how his day works from when he wakes up to when he has to go stand in front of the press.

Alexander Bisley

You did well with Kellyanne Conway. She’s one of the most slippery interviewees, isn’t she?

Seth Meyers

Oh yeah, she is. That was a case where I certainly watched a lot of tape leading up to it to try and prepare myself for her many, almost MMA-type escape moves that she has. But I was glad she came, and I really respect that. Because there aren’t a lot of people in the Trump administration who are willing to go somewhere that they know will be — not enemy territory — but let’s just say an away game. So I was glad she showed up.

Alexander Bisley

Does anything spring to mind that you’d like to ask the commander in chief?

Seth Meyers

I don’t think that there’s a good interview to be had with President Trump. I’m glad people interview him because every time they do, he says things that are outlandish and that’s good for business for us. But as far as a Late Night talk show interview, I can’t imagine one ever being satisfying. It’s not as though you’re going to say anything to him that’s going to make him reassess where he stands on the world or admit fault.

One of the things I would like to ask him is about why he thought it would be easier than what he was doing before this. What led him to think this? No one in history has ever said it was an easy job.

Alexander Bisley

“I think the moral leadership in the business community has fallen apart for the most part,” Howard Dean said, during my last Vox interview. “We need large corporations to use their influence.” Should big companies play more of a role in opposing Trumpism?

Seth Meyers

Absolutely. You certainly look at what happened in North Carolina, where I feel a lot of companies have stood by their morals in doing business there. It’s always nice to see companies take a stand. I think that companies have a real appreciation for the people that work there, and they could always do better, but look it’s a tricky business when you also have shareholders. The problem with business is it’s not built to be ethical; I think we’re lucky anytime we end up with a business leader who decides to make that a priority.

Alexander Bisley

Is there any further advice you’d give to Democrats or progressives?

Seth Meyers

Here’s what I think. This is also true for comedians these days — there’s an audience of people, and maybe it’s because of the way we’ve all lived on social media or the way that we have less and less of us that’s in private — people are very aware, both audiences and voters, they have a real strong sense of authenticity and they can immediately tell when something is inauthentic.

I think moving forward, the Democratic Party would just be really wise, and hopefully those people exist in their ranks, to have the kind of candidates who both represent the people who are more likely to vote for them and feel authentic. Because that is the one thing about Donald Trump. I know it’s a contradiction — because I don’t think he’s an honest person — but I do think he’s an authentic person. I think that that’s what the Democratic Party needs.

Alexander Bisley

Bernie Sanders, a repeat interviewee on your show, is both honest and authentic.

Seth Meyers

Yeah. Also, Bernie Sanders is likable just by being a grump [laughs]. To me, the magic trick every time Bernie Sanders comes on, people are so happy to see him, but he pretty much just talks about things he’s upset about. Even when he talks about the things he’s optimistic about, he seems really cranky.

Alexander Bisley is a regular Vox contributor and self-employed journalist. His favorite comedian is Chris Rock.

[jamilelucato]

A Guy That I’d Kinda Be Into [F. W.]

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Gryffindor!Reader (platonic); Fred Weasley x Reader.

Summary: Based on the song A Guy That I’d Kinda Be Into from the musical Be More Chill; Y/N has conflicted feelings towards Draco, but talking to Fred might make she realize that she might be into someone else.

A/N: second post from the Musical Hogwarts list!! This is so cute, but there are no kisses here if that’s what you looking for. Also, if you want to really feel the song, I recommend reading first and then rereading it with the song.

Words: 1.700+

Musical Hogwarts || Hogwarts Masterlist

Fred and George walked in the Great Hall with a confident smile. They had just pranked Ron, and they couldn’t be happier with the results.

They found a place to sit next to y/N, a girl from Gryffindor that was the same age as Harry, Ron and Hermione. She was generally quite shy, but she used to have quirky remarks that made everybody laugh.

Today, however, she was looking rather upset.

Fred sat at her right and stared at her before paying attention to the food. He was hungry, but he was more worried about her than about lunch.

“What’s wrong, y/N?”

She looked up, noticing the twins sitting next to her. She tried to grin, but it seemed wrong. She turned back to her plate.

“Nothing.” It was nice having them caring about her, but they weren’t that close; she didn’t think it was prudent to tell them a secret about herself that she wasn’t even sure it was true.

Nevertheless, something kept on pushing her to talk.

“Come on, y/N, why the disturbed face?” Fred pushed. His big brown eyes made her more susceptible to spill her beans.

“Say there’s this person you pass in the hall every day,” she finally gave in, sighing before dropping her cutlery. “You’ve known him since... the first year.”

Fred raised a brow at her. He wasn’t so sure where that conversation was going. He looked at his twin, but George was too distracted with his food.

“You’re used to thinking about him in a certain way from the persona that he displayed,” she kept saying as if every detail was important. She felt that if he knew who she meant, things would be easier to understand; however, she was not confident enough to say his name.

“Okay...” Fred kept facing her, but his hands reached for the food in front of him. Not that he wasn’t curious, it was just ’cause he was hungrier than before.

“Then something changes,” she wrinkled her nose, uncertain how to proceed. “And he changes from a guy that you’d never be into to a guy that you’d kinda be into...”

Fred froze, the fork two inches from his mouth. Was her concern love? Y/N was in love?

He had not much to an opinion about it. It was obviously gonna happen someday, he just didn’t think y/N would confide in him.

“Is he worth it?” she asked, staring at his eyes with a sad look. “Fred? Is he?” she called Fred’s attention — but he seemed much more interested in his fork. She then breathed and looked away.

Fred turned to his twin, desperately wanting help. He had no idea what to do or what to say.

“Is she talking about me?” he asked George.

“Of course, she is!” George sort of whispered loudly. He had, in fact, paid attention to the whole conversation — y/N and Fred’s interactions were kinda his favourite TV series; there was always some drama! He didn’t think, however, that y/N would be the one to confess so soon. “Keep it up,” he elbowed his brother and turned back to his food.

Fred faced y/N again and met her eyes. He felt his cheeks turning red, but he seemed oblivious to his reaction. She kept talking:

“Say there’s this person that you never knew that well,” her voice was sweet like she was afraid of saying those things and regretting it.

Fred wished he knew what to say to comfort her. He had been undergoing the same lately — conflicted feelings, jealousy at random times...

“You thought that you had him pegged, but now you can’t tell...” y/N kept rambling, repeating the same words but Fred’s mind was far away. She was in love with him! Sure, she was proposing a hypothetical situation, but why would she mention it to Fred?

It all made sense — she and Fred didn’t use to hit it off so well at first. Fred (and George) were too much of pranksters for her; she didn’t believe tricking everyone every time was decent. But, this year, Fred had started to cool off, at least around her. He was becoming a gentleman — as Ginny phrased it.

“Is he worth it? Freddie?” y/N thought Fred didn’t seem much interested, and why would he be? It wasn’t like her to drift around the twins, but she just felt like he could understand.

“Absolutely,” Fred finally answered, lowering his brows in hopes to look more approachable.

She sighed and looked down at her now cold food.

“I don’t always relate to other people my age, except when I’m on the field,” oh, Quidditch... If things were as easy as the rules of the game. “There are so many changes that I’m going through,” she faced Fred and finally smiled, a sincere smile. She blushed at his reaction. “And why am I telling this to you?”

Fred was smiling back, just curving his lips up.

“Guess there’s a part of me that wants to,” she admitted. “I guess a part of me likes to, hm, talk to you. Who knew?”

Fred kept quiet, and she thought that she should end the conversation immediately. She was already too confused; she couldn’t even remember what she was first talking about. She was going to tell Fred she was in love... with someone else, right?

“I know that it’s weird, but it’s totally true,” she concluded, tilting her head to the left. “The guy that I’d kinda be into...” was she really going to tell Fred? Oh, Merlin, he was going to freak out, he was not going to take it well. None of her friends was.

“The guy that you’d kind of be into...” Fred encouraged her. He was very close to confessing his feelings himself, but he thought it was better to let her finish.

“Yeah, that guy that I’d kinda be into is...” she swallowed hard, biting her lip, attempting to remember the guy’s name, easily distracted with Fred’s face, “Draco.”

***

Fred was panicking. He was not expecting to hear y/N confess having feelings for Draco Malfoy.

Merlin, how?? When did you have the time to befriends Draco? He couldn’t have been treating you nice from the beginning, could he?

Thankfully, George intervened after your confession.

“Bro, we gotta go now!” he pulled Fred up. “Like right now!”

Fred gulped while y/N exchanged looks with the boys, confused about what was happening and very suspicious. Fred wasn’t going to say a thing after her whole trouble of telling him about who she fancies?

She didn’t have time to stop the twins, though, because soon they disappeared out of the Hall.

Y/N sighed. Now what? Did that mean Fred disapproved? Part of her knew he wouldn’t like it — Draco was some sort of bad guy from the Weasleys’ point of view — but she expected him to say something.

Perhaps that meant she was overlooking things. Draco had been nice to her for the past couple of weeks, but maybe it didn’t mean anything. It wasn’t like Draco to be nice, but he could be trying to change.

Or he could fancy her too.

No, he probably doesn’t.

***

“Hermione?” y/N called the bushy-haired girl’s name with a weak voice, but it was sufficient for her to hear it.

She had just arrived into the Gryffindor room with Harry and Ron, but the boys seemed to have their own problems to think about, so they didn’t mind when Hermione walked towards y/N, leaving them behind.

Y/N was sitting at the bottom of the stairs — squeezed close to the wall, leaving an empty space for those who wanted to go up to their dorms.

“What’s it, y/N?” Hermione asked, sitting on the step above hers.

“I hope this doesn’t sound weird, but...” y/N gulped, “has Draco seem nicer to you lately?”

“Particularly to me, or to everyone in general?”

She gave it a thought, “in general.”

“He does seem more... calm, I guess,” Hermione answered, lowering her shoulders. “It’s not that he stopped calling people names, it’s just that he has stopped calling people at all.”

Y/N sighed, looking down at the book she had in hands. Hermione noticed the change in her mood and asked about it.

“I knew I was seeing things where there were none,” y/N rued. “I thought I could be fancying him, but I’ve passed the whole afternoon trying to list things about him that I liked I could only come up with three.”

“Are there three things you like about Malfoy?” Hermione asked in a mocking tone, and y/N giggled.

“Funny, right?” she agreed. “Well, I’ve got: good looking—”

“Unfortunately, I agree, ” Hermione interrupted with a frowned face.

“—smart and empathetic.”

“I’m sorry — empathetic? When has he been empathetic??” Hermione showed her disbelief, moving her hands around.

Y/N pressed her lips together, thinking if she should tell Hermione or not.

“He noticed I was sad about my whole parents’ thing,” she said finally, “and we talked about some families coincidences we have.”

“You mean the death eater parents?” she asked with a bit too loud voice and y/N complained. Hermione gulped a sorry.

Not everyone in school knew about the terrible family y/N had, and she wanted to keep it that way.

“Well, I guess he can understand that. But has he ever been nice to you before?”

Y/N liked that about Hermione — she was logical and wanted to know her arguments to defend the crush. She didn’t seem to care the crush in question was on Draco Malfoy.

“No, not really,” y/N sighed, looking away, tilting her head down.

“Y/N, if I can be honest, I don’t think you like him,” although harsh, Hermione’s words did not hurt you. She was right, as always. “You’re probably just needy.”

“Mione!!” she screamed, pretending to be mad with Hermione who burst into laughter.

Hermione and y/N kept sitting on the stairs, smiling at each other, glad to have one another when a new worry popped into y/N’s mind.

“Oh, shit!”

“What, y/N?” Hermione looked down at her, passing one arm around her shoulders.

Y/N wasn’t completely wrong with her thoughts — she just directed it to the wrong direction. She had a crush. It was not on Draco, however.

“I need to talk to Fred!” y/N yelled, already getting up and leaving her book behind with Hermione.

“Told you you’re needy!” Hermione shouted back, laughing hard.

Y/N slowed down just to turn back at her friend with bulging eyes. “Shut up, Mione!”

[bummyay]

Only Real in Asia: Surreal Tour, Lost Bank Card and Stingray

This is an interview I did with Niall Galvin aka Only Real for a indie music media inJune英俊 during his tour in Asia. The original article (in Chinese) is here: http://mp.weixin.qq.com/s/wyEAai7-dPrYLRbzTp4Euw

Hi! Can you introduce yourself and your bandmates to the audience?

Yeah, I’m Only Real. My mother calls me Niall, that’s my real name. And we have Ian, who plays the drum; Fred, who plays the guitar; and Alex, who plays the bass.

(Alex: I’m the doctor. I’m the tour doctor.)

Why did you decide to become a musician?

Um because…Well, I didn’t really decide as much as… it’s really crazy to say it chose me. But, you know, I really love making songs and writing songs since I was very young and that seem like the only thing I could really…I was ever only good at. And it felt like the only thing that I could apply myself at, the only thing I had any sort of concentration on. So it just kind of became my focus over my teenage years. And then when I got to like, 18, 19, I decided to really give it a go properly, and that’s when I started Only Real.

Since when did you start to write your first song?

When I was 14. It was just me. I had a Spanish guitar, and I was just in my bedroom. It was called “Over The Sea” or something like that. And it was an absolutely…it was a banger.

Did you learn how to play the guitar yourself?

Yeah, I never really learned guitar, that’s why I can’t really play the guitar. I’m not very good. I can play the piano. I learn piano since I was like, 10. And I just taught myself guitar, yeah. My brother had a Spanish guitar, that was how I kind of got my hands on one at first.

What about the software part?

That was when I was like 18, I got Ableton and just…went with it from there. And that was when Only Real started kind of shaping itself coz I have software. So it wasn’t just like the live, me and a guitar. I started to be able to put a little like “nyehh nyehh nyehh”.

What do you think is the proper term for the genre of your music? Some call it “indie pop”, and some even call it “slacker rock” or something.

I don’t know…There’re a lot of words to describe it. To be honest, I wouldn’t even bother trying to describe it because… I think, something that I hope people like about Only Real is that I’m like, a real person, and I’m a real human. So, you know, I’m gonna make a few different types of music. So…there’s element of all the different things I like, and I try not to think about it too much more than that, and just leave it like that, yeah.

Your music video, “Can’t Get Happy”. Were you the one who came up with these cartoon things?

No, I wasn’t. The director, Lee Lennox, came up with them. So he kind of pitched the idea to me. And then we worked on the characters together, coz I wanted to make sure that they were the right type of, characters.

So did you draw them yourself?

No, I didn’t draw those. He drew them. He’s like, amazing.

What’s your favorite cartoon?

Hmm…I’d say it’s between Naruto… (I’ve never watched it.) You’ve never watched Naruto? It’s like, an anime. Or…I don’t know, Rocket Power! Rocket Power is my favorite, like a Nickelodeon thing from the 90s. That’s my favorite. And then I also like Ren & Stimpy, and The Simpsons.

So what about King Of The Hill?

King Of The Hill as well, and King Of The Hill, yeah.

And Family Guy?

Family Guy’s cool, yeah. It’s funny. I don’t find it funny as I used to find it, but it’s obviously, still very funny.

You know that there has been a lot of media comparing your music with Jamie T’s or King Krule’s. There are now people comparing your music to RAT BOY’s. Have you ever listened to RAT BOY’s songs?

Yeah, yeah I find this stuff.

And how did you like it?

It’s alright, yeah. It’s fine, but it’s not really for me. It’s not meant for me, you know. He seems like a really nice guy. But I don’t know, it’s not the music…it’s not targeted at me, at 26.

What about Jamie T?

I love Jamie T. I think Jamie T’s great.

And King Krule?

Yeah, same, same.

Are you a happy-go-lucky kind of person?

Yeah I’d say so.

(Ian: You’re a little wanker.)

He said I was a little wanker. (To Ian,) I’ll let you answer this one.

(Ian: Yeah, he’s alright, he’s alright. He has his ups and downs.)

Which musician would you like to collaborate with, right now?

(Taylor Swift?) Taylor Swift, could do a bit Taylor Swift.

Uh who would I want to collaborate with? Danger Mouse.

Danger Mouse, still Danger Mouse? I’ve seen one of your interviews, and you said Danger Mouse before.

Yeah, I just think Danger Mouse would be a really good fit.

 It must be totally different for you to perform on stage, from producing your music in the bedroom, right?

Yeah, I think…it’s just funny enough, we were talking about this yesterday after the show we played last night. I think there’s a lot more energy in the live show, and that partly comes from the fact that I’ve got a band with me, rather than just making it on my own. It’s a bit more aggressive and a bit more upbeat than the record.

Where did you find them (the bandmates)?

Where did I find these? In a skip. Um, no…they were friends of friends and then they became my friends.

How often do you rehearse?

About once a year, yeah. No, we rattle through the songs at the airport on the way to Tokyo. We try to keep it relatively tight.

(Alex: We rehearse in sound check.)

Yeah, we get it in when we can.

Do you have stage fright?

I’ve never ever had it. But when we played in Tokyo, like a week ago, I really did. It was fine once I went onstage, but I was nervous before I went on. I think it’s because it’s obviously such a surreal…it was just mad that I was in Tokyo and Asia, you know.

A lot of audience in Tokyo?

Yeah, quite a lot. But I’ve played bigger shows and not been nervous. But it was just the fact that, it was like… (You are in Asia.) Yeah, it was like, “What’s going on?” You know, it’s like a dream. It’s a complete dream.

Do you have any stage antics you hope to try in the future, like smashing a guitar or something?

No I don’t think…I can’t afford to smash a guitar. Not really, no. We’ll just have a few drinks and see what happens, really. We’ll have a few Lagers.

Your lyrics are based on the way you observe, right?

Yeah, completely.

So what have you discovered during this tour in Asia that you think can be written in a song?

(Fred: Traffic’s fucked.)

Yeah, the traffic is fucked. I’d say...I really like coming up with song ideas on planes because you’re on a plane, you’re like, normally flying somewhere and it’s normally pretty exciting, so that kind of fills your mind to be like, this idea and that idea. We’re going to see some pandas in Chengdu, so I might be able to get some sort of a song out of that.

Do you have any anecdotes during this tour that you can share with us?

A lot of stuff…it’s been pretty crazy.

I mean, when we were in Tokyo we didn’t sleep for like 4, 5 days. We just didn’t sleep; we had like, one hour, two hour sleep a night, which led to us becoming quite deranged, really.  

How many shows did you have in Tokyo?

Just one.

Just one? But you said you hadn’t slept for 4, 5 days.

It was almost because we didn’t have any shows, so we just got… (Partied.) We just partied, yeah.

Oh I know a story, actually. So I put my bank card in a bank machine, and it just took it, and it just swallowed it, and now I don’t have a bank card. So…and I asked them and they were just like, “Nope, bye, nope.”

So what did you do?

I said “xiexie(thank you)” for nothing. So yeah, I haven’t got a bank card now. Got no money. I didn’t have any money on that anyway.

What are you up to this year, after touring in Asia?

Not a lot. Going home is gonna be really sad because it’s so exciting being here. I’m just writing my new record at the moment. So I’m just writing, really. Just writing loads and tryna, kind of get that to a place that I feel happy with. So I think that I’ll probably say, most of this year, just writing.

What will the cover be like, for your new album?

I have no idea. I haven’t thought. The music is sounding a bit more…It’s less guitary. I’m writing quite a lot on the piano, and then... (I’ve listened to “In The Mood”.) Yeah but it’s not like that, it’s more like, rappy, hip-hoppy, kind of OutKasty.

Use one of your own songs to describe your tour in Asia.      

Oh, just like the title of the song? (Uh, whatever.) OK, “Can’t Get Happy”.

(Fred: You’re a happy-go-lucky guy.)

No, I’d say maybe like…“Punks And Potions”, because that song’s literally about experiencing a city. So even though all the characters and all the things that that song talks about are different, it’s still very relevant. We’ve seen, we’ve come across quite a few little, weird little characters in our time in Tokyo.

 Like what?

We saw a dance troop, like, a dance troop just surrounded us and started going “hai hai hai”. (In Where?) In Tokyo. And then, loads of people just like, inviting you into rooms, to like, have sex with them. (What? Really? Also in Tokyo?) Yeah yeah yeah.

(Fred: And a German bloke who tried to beat up an ATM.)

There was a German guy that…He also lost his bank card. I don’t know why, but just everyone at that moment was losing their bank cards. I’m a bit empathetic at the moment, but…And he got really angry at that.

So I think that’s probably the best choice of the song.

What are you listening to now?

(To Fred) What were we playing the other night?

(Fred: Oh, “Grease”, Flo Morrissey.)

Yeah, Flo Morrissey and Matthew E. White, that album. Um, Chance The Rapper, I love the new Chance The Rapper record, the mixtape. 

I like the mixtape, “Acid Rap”. 

Yeah Acid Rap, he put a new one out this year. Twin Peaks, big fan of Twin Peaks. (Twin Peaks? Alright.) You know, the band, not the show, the band.

Did you like the show Twin Peaks?

I haven’t seen that. (To Fred and Alex) You’ve seen that.

(Alex: It’s good. Fred: It’s really good.)

It’s been highly recommended.

(Fred: There’s a new season as well.)

I’ve never seen it, I’m ashamed to say. It’s quite strange I haven’t.

What’s your favorite Yo La Tengo album?

I don’t really have a favorite album. I like loads of different songs of different albums. My favorite songs are “Our Way To Fall” and “Don’t Have To Be So Sad”, and…I’m probably forgetting those but yeah…

What about Deerhunter?

Yeah I love Deerhunter. “Halcyon Digest” is my favorite Deerhunter album. That’s a great album.

Do you collect anything, like vinyls, CDs, or cassettes?

Um…no. When I was a kid, I used to collect, what were they called? You know when you get like, little stained glass things that you got from the window, so you can get like, a bird or something. They’re ornamental, just like, little stained glass ornaments. That was the only thing I’ve ever really collected. It’s like, you hang them and they’re like, ornaments.

(OK, but I’m not sure what it is.)

(Fred: Did you get them in cereal?)

No you get them in gift shops. They’re like glass. They’re made of glass. They’re called, window hangers or something.

(Ian: Weird little man, weird little man.)

Yeah, weird little man, yeah.

I remember that you talk about, when you’re not making music, you go skating, right?

Uh no, no. I like skateboarding, like I like watching it. I still really like watching it.

(Fred: We did some the other day, in Tokyo.)(Alex: You’re too long to skate, I think.)

I’m too tall to, yeah.

(Alex: You’ve got too much (up there)…you’ll fall over.)

My sense of balance is...But I like watching it. I’m obsessed with that guy, Elijah Berle. He’s a good skateboarder.

So what do you do when you’re not making music?

Um…just like, what everyone else, what every other young person does, really. Just drink pints, large drinks. Have a few Lagers. That’s about it.

What have you read lately?

What’s the last book I read? Gary Neville’s autobiography. You know, the footballer, Gary Neville?

I don’t know. But you obviously read a lot of autobiographies, or biographies.

I love autobiographies, yeah. I like footballers’ autobiographies. I’ve read Gary Neville’s, Vinnie Jones’s. Gary Neville’s was pretty good, I recommend. And then what else have I read, something a bit more highbrow. Um, I read a guide book about Asia.

I read your Vice interview. You said in “Cadillac Girl”, the chorus was “She’s so bold with me” instead of “She’s so over me”, so were you fooling around with Vice?

Well, so basically at that point it was “bold”, in the demo it was “bold”. But then when I re-recorded it, everyone was like, “Is it over or bold?” And I was like, you know what, “over” is so much better, it makes so much more sense. I changed it. So in the demo it was “bold”, but now it’s “over”.

So is it also the stage of your relationship, with that “Cadillac Girl”?

No, because by “bold”, it meant like, because she was over me, she was bold. It’s kind of interchangeable, really.

Have you tried any Chinese food here?

Yeah, this is Pizza Hut, but we have actually tried Chinese food as well. Today we went and had a lovely Cantonese meal. I’ve eaten...we’ve eaten loads of Chinese food. Chicken feet, duck feet, uh…We had pork trotters. 

We had Taiwanese hot pot in Taipei, which is really cool. We’ve been pretty experimental with it. Loads of sushi and stuff in Tokyo, well, not loads of sushi, but some sushi.

(Fred: Stingray.)

Stingray. (What’s Stingray?) It’s like a big fish…you know that fish, that have like, a spike at the bottom. And they go at the bottom of the sea.

(Ian: It killed Steve Irwin.)

The fish that killed Steve Irwin.

(Ian: It’s his birthday.) (Alex: Papa bless. It’s his birthday.)

It’s Steve Irwin’s birthday. Happy Birthday, Steve Irwin.

(Alex: You know Steve Irwin?) (No, who is he?)

The Australian crocodile hunter.

(Alex: He’s a guy that, like, he wrestles a crocodile, and then he got killed by stingray. He’s gone now, but he’s amazing.) (Got it.)

He was great, he was good.

(Alex: Papa bless.)

He was cool, but he.... It’s a fish swims along the bottom of the sea, along the seabed. And it’s got a big spike at the bottom, or the front? I don’t know. I don’t really know. I don’t know much about them.

I have a question for the fans. Will you be back in China again?

I really hope so, yeah. I think this seems to be going quite well, and it seems to be a bit of a vibe here. People seem to like it, so, yeah, I think it would make sense, to come back.

@onlyrealreal

[drumpfwatch]

The Kinds of Resistance

Let’s cut right to the chase. I’ve learned there are two ways to fix bigotry in this word. Violence and compassion. Given the unique history of the Black Rights Movement, I like to call these approaches the “Malcolm X” approach and the “Martin Luther King Jr.” approach.

    I’m aware that the analogy isn’t perfect, but I think it will do a good enough job of making my point by at least adding a distiction. If someone more learned on the matter then me has an opinion to share and better suggestions for names, then they can let me know. But, see, there’s a reason I chose the two of them.

    And let’s just be absolutely clear here: Martin Luther King was a revolutionary. He was literally thrown in jail for his beliefs and if you actually read his letters, he’s not the passive fellow (white) people would have you believe he is. Yes, he was primarily focused on peaceful resistance, but civil disobedience was a primary tool in his arsenal. Never forget that the most irritating thing in the world for him, by his own admission, was white moderate people whose would focus on the fact that riots were happening rather than the fact that there was perhaps a reason for the discontent those people felt.

    His method is what we call passive resistance, and it was very effective. White racists would have you believe that this meant basically doing nothing, the entire point of King’s work was to be disruptive. The boycott of Montgomery Buses was designed to fuck up the public transportation system so hard that they’d HAVE to change their ways or risk collapse. Market force is the most powerful force in a capitalist economy, after all.

    Of course, stubbornness is an of itself a weapon, and that’s why, while the boycott was going on, there were teams of people arguing the Browder vs. Gayle case. Between the government literally banning segregated busses, and the amount of money public transportation lost from the boycott, there’s wasn’t really an alternative end to the story. It is, doubtless, effective.

    But now that we’ve established his work as a revolutionary, there is something about him that’s even more important to recognize. Martin Luther King Jr. was a compassionate soul. He’s recorded as having said that he wanted to liberate the white man as well, from the hatred within his heart. That being as hateful and racist as they were also a detriment. And to that end, he took every opportunity within reach to try and include whites - even if they were racist. The effect this can have is recorded in stories like that of The White Flight of Derek Brown, where an avowed southern nationalist and neo-nazi was carefully removed from his life as a racist by a loving Jew and his friends who invited him to dinner.

    This method takes time. It takes persistence, patience, and compassion. But it works. If you can find a way to do it, I highly recommend it, as these sorts of people usually end up being some of our best advocates. It usually requires a person having distance from networks that would further encourage their fanaticism. There’s a reason why fanatics are terrified of sending their kids to college. It’s an environment that challenges their radical perceptions while dividing them from the networks that built it up.

    There are other ways it can work, too. Let’s say you get into an argument with a KKK member about how black people are ‘causing the genocide of the white race’. If you remain calm, cool, collected, and compassionate, showing them empathy - even when they are screaming you down with all the hate in their body - and do this in a public form, other people will see the difference. They will see you being kind and sensible, while your opponent is angry and furious. This can also be a ton of fun. If you remain calm and ask questions in the right way to better understand your opponent's position before showing that they are factually wrong on something, you effectively give them enough rope to hang themselves. I recommend Potholer54’s video “How to Argue with Assholes” for more information on how to do that.

    The point is, you may not convince the one you’re arguing with, but you can convince the people watching. Those people, looking for answers, will see one side vomiting out hate and falsehoods while another gently corrects them and asks how fact A can be a thing when fact B contradicts it. As long as you’re on the right side, nothing can go wrong.

    So that’s the King tactic. Be polite, be kind, but be forceful. Do not let yourself be pushed around and lied about, but never become aggressive - your focus is on the system, not the individual. King spoke of wanting to liberate hateful whites from their own hatred as much as his black siblings from their oppression. Be empathetic, but do not give an inch.

    The Malcolm X tactic is being fierce and unrelenting. Show no mercy, to any hateful or ignorant scrub who knocks on your door. At first, this may sound rude and unnecessary, but in some places it absolutely is required. In the scientific arena, for instance, conspiracy theorists without evidence should be laughed out of the room without mercy because their ideas are not just wrong, they’re hurtful. These false ideas can cause real damage, and in some situations paying them credence is only more fuel for them to believe. You cannot convince these people that they are wrong and you never will, so they are best either trampled or ignored.

The thinking here is that these people have dug their own grave, and it’s their decision to dig themselves out of it. This isn’t entirely untrue. These sorts of people are often so far stuck up their own ass that there’s no easy way to argue them down, and any effort to show them respect will be met with hatred. Imagine, if you will, a gay couple inviting Fred Phelps to a dinner like the Jewish man did for Derek Black. The whole point of the exercise was to not alienate him, to show that these people were human.

Phelps had decided long ago that I, personally, as a gay person, am not human. Or, at the very least, that I do not deserve to be treated like one. And that my friends, is the candor that characterizes the X method. Zero shits are given, and the opposition is not just a disagreement but an enemy that must be silenced.

This may sound harsh to some, but it absolutely has its place. This tactic isn’t to be used for Joe Blow on the street, but it absolutely must be used for people like David Duke. The people leading the charge. Even if those people are not so deluded that there’s hope to convince them, their entire lives have been built around their hatred and denying their Klanship or the equivalent means ostensibly burning their life. There are few people who can do that, and frankly, those people need to discover that for themselves. There are also times when trying to reason just isn’t appropriate. When the Nazis came to round up the Jews, that was not a time to have a conversation to convince the SS Soldier at your door that maybe, the Jews are good people. That’s the time to punch the Nazi in the face.

Those people have already stood up to be counted with the forces of dissension, despair and hate. They have their allegiances entirely clear. It helps to think of them as human - never, EVER think of any other Homo Sapien as any less - but they are a human who has made a decision to kill other humans and murder innocents because of their own personal hatreds. Those people have not earned the right to be reasoned with. There are times when action is called for, not words. People in the world who can’t be swayed with a Kum-bye-yah. Those people must be removed from positions where they can operate their nefarious hatreds as soon as possible.

So, with those two methods laid out, which one should you use?? Which way is the right way to fight hatred? As you might have figured out by who I wrote this, the answer, I believe, is “both.” Some situations call for aggression and others camaraderie. Some days, the call to resist needs to be heard, and in those days, the worst sorts of people are the ones who try and say “why can’t everyone just get along?”

Because, friend, we tried. But this is no longer about being nice. This is about people dying if they do not fight for justice. On this Martin Luther King Jr, day, I remind all of you, that your duty to your fellow human is to understand that asking them to be friends with people who are deliberately hateful is a burden. You want me to sit at the table with someone who wants me DEAD? Then you show me that person is worth saving, that they can be saved. ANd it’s not our duty to teach the unoppressed every detail of the oppressed. It’s time they took up the weight, too.

[serenagaywaterford]

14) possible. Huge mistake, imo" Yeah. The show is already dragging. If they keep this up, the series will eventually lose a lot of its charm and meaning. e) "So, without June around I feel like Serena will just go back to old ways. Which is ridic cos she is an intelligent, powerful woman when she actually has the balls." Indeed. It's like Gilead has taken its toll on her and reduced her to a coward. Pre-Gilead Serena was a firecracker, even if she was fighting on the wrong side (that sounded

15) manichaeistic, but you know what I mean). For the record, I do believe they’ll give her some sort of redemption at some point. I’m just a little pessimistic. How are they gonna sell it as plausible and organic after 2x10? We’ll see, I guess. f) “It was just such a prime example of exactly how they maintain power in Gilead and how they managed to get it working: estranging women from each other.” SO. MUCH. GOLD. Suffice it to say, I really liked that June confronted Fred, after she didn’t

16) manage to get through Serena’s walls (and pride).And don’t get me started on that white rose. Every single flower has a special meaning/symbolism on this show and given that the garden is the only thing left to Serena at this point (kudos for admitting that knitting sucks, Serena, I’m 100% with you on that LMAO)… Word though. That music box and the flower were certainly nice gifts (small steps are better than none), but I still think that Serena could have done better. If she could get rid

17) of Cushing that easily, she could have let June see Hannah. That would have been an EXCELLENT way to express her gratitude/show her kindness, but alas. As for June’s excitement with the gifts? I smiled, I couldn’t help it. But I also felt a little sad for her. She’s so used to Serena abusing her and treating her like a baby machine (instead of an actual person), that such a little kindness makes her happy af. It really astonishes me how empathic June is with Serena (funny aka not funny at

18) all how that same empathy doesn’t extend to Fred) in the finale, even after the 2x10 incident. She’s certainly got some Stockholm Syndrome going on, but it’s also not that simple? There’s the codependency (fuck you Fred), the intellectual compatibility (writer/editor), the fact they’re both victims of Gilead now and that they both didn’t try to burst their own personal bubbles when it mattered (pre-Gilead). Holly tried to wake June up of course, because things were looking grim, but June

19) ignored her. Damn, I could go and on about this toxic yet fascinating duo, but I’ll restrain myself.

———-

[I had to look up what manichaeistic means, and now I’ve learnt a new word! :D Also, yes, I totally get what you mean.] Firecracker is a good word. I feel like she’s one of those people who is super enthusiastic about ideals, and thinks they’re great ideas, and then… learns the hard way and is killed by their own ideas. (Literally or metaphorically.) She’s so interesting to watch because her pre-Gilead persona was quite a bit different, just in a different way than the other women. Hers isn’t so much a physical cage (like Handmaids and Marthas are literal slaves) as a psychological one. 

I honestly don’t know how they think they’re going to convince the viewers that Serena even deserves any sort of redemption story. 2x10 was a serious nail in the coffin. The only way I can even see it working if Serena suffers A LOT, shows genuine remorse and understanding, AND if we see things from June’s POV who gives Serena a pass for every single horrible thing she does. Serena is like June’s blindspot. It’s mental. Like you said, June is shockingly empathetic with Serena who doesn’t deserve it at all. She just never seems to give up on her no matter what horrible shit she does. Like??? And, yes, there is clearly some Stockholm Syndrome thing going on but it seems to me anyway, that June is very forgiving (most cos she has to be to survive physically and mentally) and that she’s really fucking good at compartmentalizing. If I’m correct about that last one, it’s going to come back and bite her in the ass one day and there will be a breakdown. You can only stuff things away in little boxes for so long before it all falls down. I have to think the relationship (whatever it is, antagonistic or cooperative) is so much more complex. 

I think to some degree, June sees Serena for what (a loser) she is and that is very scary for Serena, but for June it allows her to empathise a bit easier than most. I don’t think we as viewers even get many glimpses of Serena, just chilled out and herself as you would EXPECT a human being to be. One of those is 2x06 where I think the OG Serena comes thru esp the night fireside where Serena is like… a completely different person?? From the weird parroting of June’s slang, and probably one of the only times we actually see her smile authentically at feeling the baby move, to that weirdass attempt at bonding during that Handmaid party (wtf), she’s so socially awkward around women it’s unbelievable. (Maybe that’s the guilt when you’re faced with all these women your perfect society has enslaved!) But it’s like she really wants to make a connection for some reason. And then when June asks to see Hannah, and Serena just starts crying??? And we find out as she throws a plant pruning tantrum in her safe space lol it’s cos she thought her and June were actually becoming friends?????? LIKE. WHAT IS HAPPENING. What is this high school shit? That episode made it seem like Serena just really wants a girl friend and is pissed off cos she thinks June was only being nice to get close to her daughter –which duh. “I DID THESE WHOLE 3 NICE THINGS! WHY DOES SHE KEEP ASKING TO SEE HER KID? WHAT A DEVIOUS BITCH!!!!” (Clearly the other Wives aren’t real friends.) MAYBE, and I’m just throwing this out there, the best way to make friends is not kidnapping, enslaving, raping, and assaulting the girl you want to be your bestie lol??? Just a wild thought, Serena.

I’m not trying to woobiefy Serena, but when I watch that episode, it’s just such a different Serena than we’ve seen except in other glimpses (and usually those were just because Serena was directly getting something she wants), but in 2x06 she stays very consistent in it. And, incidentally, she doesn’t attack June at the end. She just runs off and sulks like a child. Then 2 episodes later, with Fred out of the picture, she’s back to wanting to be besties again, coming to June’s room and confiding in her and asking her advice and blah blah blah. It’s shit like that that make me wonder if that’s the side June relies on in order to be able to forgive Serena–for her own survival.

Maybe I give Serena way too much credit. That’s possible. She’s still an awful terrible person, but there may be a tiny sliver of humanity in there somewhere.

So if we see more of that Serena who doesn’t resort to violence every time something doesn’t go her way, and we view her thru June’s eyes rather than our own, perhaps they can finagle some sort of not-completely-bonkers redemption arc. But it’ll be really difficult imo.

ANYWAY. 

Yes, I thought those moments at Serena’s door and then going to Fred was brilliant. Like, you can see that June knows EXACTLY what is going on with Serena, and how disappointed and annoyed she is that Serena folded so easily, and now June’s on her own again so she has to go protect herself and kneel to the king to save herself.

I have mixed feelings about the music box. It’s so… trivial and stupid and juvenile on the one hand. It’s very symbolic on the other, even June sees it. The girl in the box. And then, when you consider that Serena likely has very little she can give to June in terms of physical objects (since basically Wives had to throw away everything) so she gave her her childhood music box which she was likely saving for her imaginary daughter. If you take it that way, it is meaningful. But that’s just fanwank really. And, it locks. That may mean nothing, but it may mean something. June has literally nothing else of her own that has any sort of privacy but Serena gives her a box AND the key to lock it. 

Honestly, lol, when I first watched 2x08 and Serena is like, “I won’t forget your help”, I turned to my friend and was like, “Was that a threat?” Like you just can’t tell sometimes with Serena. I was relieved when it wasn’t in fact a threat lol.

I agree SO HARD about the flower/music box gift in 2x08 though. Like, c’mon. Firstly, bitch, you’re recycling gifts now? You’re just giving her BACK something you took away to punish her. And a flower, which will die. With all her connections, she easily could have given June something about Hannah, either a visit or a photo or a drawing or SOMETHING. This is something I still don’t get about Serena: why she is SO FUCKING OPPOSED to letting June have anything to do with Hannah? Maybe you have a theory? It’s one of those things I don’t get. Is it cos she’s jealous June has a child and she doesn’t? Is it just a power play thing? WHAT THE HELL IS HER PROBLEM WITH JUNE AND HANNAH? Like, she easily could have June eating out of her hand if she arranged a visit(or two) with Hannah. Instead, she throws temper tantrums any time June brings up Hannah. IDGI. Sigh.

And yeah, if you really want to show June your gratitude, it takes more than a fucking child’s toy. And ITA. The saddest part was how happy June was just to have that box. She was literally hugging it like a child and it broke my heart. Like, that’s what she’s been reduced to by Gilead, and the Waterfords. 

(Side note: I feel like June is one of the worst treated Handmaids on a daily basis? Like, sure, Naomi doesn’t like Janine but they have a much nicer house, gorgeous room, she gets ice-cream, etc. Janine fucking BIT Naomi to the point she bled, and she doesn’t appear to be punished for it at all! Can you imagine if June bit Serena? All hell would break loose. There’s that Wife that feels for Emily and tries not to do Ceremonies, and she plays with the dog and stuff. And I don’t know how bad/good it was for Lilly, but she said she preferred it over her previous life. Meanwhile June’s trapped in the dark, musty attic and Serena insists on making her life extra-miserable every chance she gets, including not even allowing June to wean Nicole (intentionally).)

And despite that, June is still like, “Well, Serena deserves my kindness.” WHAT. June is a much better person than I would be. Then again, I can’t help thinking at least in the finale, that June felt a little guilt. Serena never would have lost a finger if she hadn’t pushed her to do it. BUT THAT’S MOTHERHOOD. Sacrifice not for yourself (like Serena does), but yourself for your children. I read some interview where the showrunners were saying the main line through S2 was June teaching Serena how to be a mother. And that really didn’t make sense to me for a while. And it really solidified June’s pure, unabated hatred for Fred. As if slapping him wasn’t hint enough, she leaves Serena’s room after comforting her, and confronts Fred about it. If I was Fred, I’d be even more concerned then than when I found the rose tbh. If June is willing to come after Fred directly after he had his own wife maimed, in defense of said wife, that’s some bond right there. But then, June doesn’t seem to give a fuck about Fred at all and isn’t scared of him at all. Which, is smart in a way, cos he’s so grossly obsessed with her that she can get away with virtually anything. 

“There’s the codependency (fuck you Fred), the intellectual compatibility (writer/editor), the fact they’re both victims of Gilead now and that they both didn’t try to burst their own personal bubbles when it mattered (pre-Gilead).“

OMG. OMG. OMG. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SOMEONE SAYS IT!!!

That last bit is something I sort of keep to myself cos like criticising June isn’t on my list of fav things to do but I thought the show was trying to make it REALLY clear that June was pretty late to the party when it comes to Gilead. Like, she had so many warning signs, even Moira was calling shit out, and she just sort of went along with the Gilead prep. Holly (a lot) and Moira (to some degree) were both like “WAKE UP!” But June and Luke just la-dee-da’ed around like “Oh it’s not that bad.” There’s the bathtub analogy and she even comments on how nobody really paid proper attention when it was building. So, at least she knows. 

I’m not hating ofc. I think almost everybody would behave the same. You see it already in some places. So, I’m not saying June is terrible for not doing more and it’s easy for us to say, “OMG. If that shit started here I’d be outta America so quickly!” But, at the end of the day, most people just sit by and watch.

But I mean insinuating in any way that June deserves what she got gets the wrath of Hell. Not that I am saying that! Nobody deserves what those women get but it’s important to think critically about these characters and if June recognises she was idle until it was too late, I think as viewers we should be able to say the same. Without it being taken as victim blaming, which I am very much NOT doing.

Also, as an aside, I understand how problematic it can be to suggest that June’s forgiveness of Serena is the desirable outcome cos IRL I think forgiving abusers is a very dangerous path to go down. It never ends well. (Although I am also someone who counts restorative justice as a viable option for some crimes. I studied it for a term in uni and it’s not something I can discount. I don’t think punitive/retributive justice is always the answer. Note: I’m talking about Serena’s crimes against June specifically here; her other wider crimes require something stronger than a healing circle lol.) The only thing I can think of is the entire environment of Gilead is so different that perhaps if you remove environment, people can change. It’s a very dangerous game to play and I certainly wouldn’t suggest this to anybody in the real world... I just, I want Serena to get some sort of redemption--and I don’t mean “happy ending”. Just something... else. And I am not opposed in the THT universe to June forgiving her. Simply cos there’s a bit in the book (IIRC) about forgiveness being true power and it seems like the idea the show is playing with. It’s something I remember from my childhood indoctrination at church as well, this whole “forgiveness is power!” mantra. I’m not sure I buy it. (I think it could be freedom, but I dunno. I’m no theologian or philosopher.) Ah. I’m conflicted.

“Damn, I could go and on about this toxic yet fascinating duo, but I’ll restrain myself. “

PLEASE DO NOT RESTRAIN YOURSELF. IMO they are indeed the most toxic yet fascinating pair on the show and I could read your thoughts about them forever. Not to mention, I feel like the actors have really good chemistry and play off each other exceptionally well. Again, I can’t recall the exact interview but I think it was Yvonne talking about the process and she and Moss really walk thru it and figure out everything. All that work shows. Honestly, this cast is strong. Like I can think of 6 of them that are excellent, a few that are pretty good, and then some blahs (no names mentioned lol). Ann Dowd totally deserved that Emmy for S1 and I honestly, I know I’m completely biased and all, but Yvonne’s S2 performance was stronger than Ann, AND everyone else in that category tbh. So nuanced.