#why are we so focused on productivity when it comes to creativity??

[wanderingcas]

idk why people are so obsessed with writing a book within a timeline. like all the blogs/accounts/whatever are so focused on "how to write a book in a year" or "finish your editing in 3 months" nah bro. i'm going to take 10 years to finish one book, actually. because i have a day job and probably 20 minutes to write a day.

[traveler-at-heart]

Doctor's In - Holiday Special

Summary: You get ready for your first Christmas with the Maximoffs, but not everything goes according to plan.

Part 2 of 3 of the Holiday Special

A/N: Can you spot the major character we're introducing?

Wanda Maximoff x F!R

Wanda wakes up, alone and confused. The light outside tells her it’s later than usual, and she suddenly remembers it’s a school day.

The woman hurries down the stairs, finding you in the kitchen.

“Hey, chatty patty” you say with a smile, loving her disheveled state. “Hungry?”

“What time is it?”

“Almost 11” you look at your wrist watch, pushing a plate towards her.

“School! The kids!”

“I already drove them to school, and yes they had breakfast that wasn’t just cereal” you explain. Wanda finally sits, and looks at the french toast you’re offering.

“This is really good” she praises as she takes a bite.

“I know I call you cute when you’re cooking, but that’s not the only reason I watch you do it, baby” you smile, kissing her temple as you stand up to pour her some coffee. “In Medicine you learn by watching and doing. I’m trying to learn cooking as if it was the same”

“You’re on the right track. Thank you” she comments as you hand the mug. “I’m just a little lost, why did I not wake up?”

“You really don’t remember?” you say, amused.

“No. Did we…?” she says, suddenly afraid that she fell asleep in the middle of sex.

“Oh, no. If we did, you’d remember. Trust me” you say in a low voice, moving closer. Wanda’s eyes drift to your lips and you smile, pleased with her reaction. “No, we didn’t have sex, baby. You woke up at two in the morning talking about a book idea and I wrote it all down until you went back to sleep”

Wanda notices the notebook on the counter, and she takes it. The story is about a girl that makes a drawing of her perfect pet. Her brother sees it and adds things like dragon wings and fangs. By night, the drawing comes to life, and it follows the girl everywhere she goes.

“This is a full story”

“Mhm”

“This is like three months work”

“Glad to hear we were productive” you nod, not understanding her issue with saving months of work.

“This never happens!”

“Counterpoint, you never had a light sleeper that woke up to your mumbling” you point out, stealing some of her toast.

“Yeah… that’s a good point” Wanda says, frowning. You miss the way she looks at you, as you lean forward to read over everything she said while asleep. Honestly, the story is sweet and very original. To think it was something she came up while asleep is bonkers.

“Wow” you laugh as Wanda lunges forward, kissing every inch of your face.

“You’re so hot right now” she says against your neck and you sigh, pleased.

“Well, let me show you what other stuff we could do to lose some sleep” you propose, carrying her to the couch.

—

For the next day, while you’re at work, Wanda is focused on meeting with Laura and her publisher. You get a few texts here and there, but you know she’s in the middle of a creative storm and you’re happy she finally found the inspiration needed for her next book.

Still, it’s a tough shift as you lost sleep on your day off.

“Wild night?” Darcy says as you’re sprawled across the break room couch.

“Jealous?”

“Meh” she shrugs her shoulders. “I hear Fury is going to be lighting up the Christmas tree in the foyer. Wanna come see?”

“Oh, yeah!” you stand up, eager to check if it will go down the same as every year. Without fail, someone forgets to test the lights and as he plugs it in, nothing happens.

Darcy and you are leaning against the railway, chuckling while Fury screams.

“Every damn year! We run a hospital. Why can’t anyone check the lights?”

“It never gets old” you smile, feeling like the holidays are finally here. You’re about to suggest a trip to the cafeteria when Carol comes right behind you, borderline hysterical.

“Where the hell have you been?”

“Uh… is there an emergency? Did you page me?” you check your device, Darcy frowning at Carol’s outburst.

“Yes, there’s an emergency! Come here, the both of you”

With surprising strenght, she pulls you to one of the meeting rooms, a couple of sample cakes in display.

“We’re tied”

“Who is?” you say, reading the flavors written in the small cards.

“Maria wants one flavor and I want another one. We need a tiebreak. You are my maid of honor. So, help me!”

“Ok, we’ll try them out. Jeez”

“I’ll be right back” Carol says, leaving the room in a hurry.

Grabbing a fork, you begin to take little bites of every cake, nodding approvingly.

“Chocolate ganache is to die for” you moan, feeling so happy that Carol is in the middle of this predicament.

“You should have red velvet for your wedding” Darcy points at the one she’s tasting.

“I’m not getting married”

“Yet”

“Darcy, come on” you roll your eyes.

“Oh, like you don’t have an idea on how to propose to Wanda already” she mocks, which shuts you up real fast. “I know you better than anyone. And I better be your maid of honor”

“I’m not getting married” you insist, this time  with less conviction.

You keep discussing the flavors and come to the conclusion that chocolate ganache is the winner.

“That’s the wrong answer! Carrot cake!” Carol huffs when you tell her your decision.

“Not everyone likes it. It’s just a weird choice” you say, while Darcy nods.

“Everyone likes chocolate” she points out.

“Fine, whatever! You win, Willy Wonka” Carol storms out of the room.

“Wow, you dodged a bullet there” Darcy says and you nudge her side.

“Don’t be mean. She wants her wedding to be perfect. That’s nice” in that precise moment, you get paged and you decide to take the rest of the chocolate cake to eat on the way. “See ya!”

“Thief!”

A couple of emergencies take your attention, making you go into the OR. Your phone is forgotten and by the time you check, there’s a single text from Wanda.

W: Are you coming for lunch? I want to tell you something important.

Your heart begins to race, and you remember a few days ago during the snow storm. She mentioned something but you distracted Wanda and you figured it wasn’t that important.

Y/N: Is everything ok?

Coming out of nowhere, Carol once agains blindsides you.

“Are you ready to go?”

“Go…”

“Dress fitting. Your bridesmaid dress”

“Now?” you look at your phone. Wanda hasn’t replied. But Carol looks ready to kill you and you won’t take your chances. “Sure, let’s go”

Y/N: Gotta take care of something, will try to be back for lunch. Love you.

There’s no reply and during the entire car ride, you look out the window, wondering if you messed up in any way.

“I’m sorry” Carol says, mistaking your silence with annoyance. “For snapping at you”

“Oh, that’s… well, not cool, but I don’t take offense. I just never thought you’d be the Bridezilla type, Danvers” you joke.

“It’s more about the holidays. Maria’s family and mine are coming over. They’ve met each other a few times, but you know… it just feels like whatever happens during Christmas will set the tone for the wedding. And marriage”

“Sounds like a lot of pressure” you agree.

“I admire you for setting boundaries with your mother”

“It’s not a boundary, it’s more like thousands of miles and avoidance” you reluctantly admit, which makes her laugh. “It’s all gonna be fine. You’re marrying the girl of your dreams, and I will be there as well, in a cool, not at all pink bridesmaid gown to help with whatever happens”

“Actually…”

“It’s pink?” you say, mouth wide open. Carol nods, avoiding your eyes and you huff. “You’re lucky I’m such a good friend”

—

Wanda’s buzzing with excitement as she stops by the cafeteria, ready for her second meeting of the week with Laura.

It seems as if this new book will be out fast, and if it’s as successful as her past stories, Wanda could finally have some free time to focus on a whole different thing: a trilogy for young adults.

Wanda leaves the cafeteria carrying a tray with two cups and scones, knowing that you’d be the first one to support her if it all works out.

She’s surprised to find you walking across the street, as your last message gave her the impression you still had work to do. Wanda is about to call for you, when someone else joins you in the sidewalk.

Carol says something that makes you smile, linking her arm with yours. Both of you walk in the opposite direction of Wanda, getting inside a store.

Wanda replays the moment where Carol opened the door for you over and over again.

“Ready for day two?” Laura says as soon as her friend walks to her office. “Wanda?”

It doesn’t take much for Wanda to tell her what she saw. Beyond that, she goes over your strange attitude recently, smoking compulsively and having trouble sleeping.

“Maybe she’s rethinking our relationship, maybe Carol is trying to win her back…”

“Wow, slow down. You said they were going inside a bridal shop?”

“Yes, I think it was”

“Well, what if… she’s thinking about… ya know” Laura says, wiggling her eyebrows excitedly.

“No, I don’t. What do you mean?” Wanda says, resisting the urge to drive back and get answers straight from you.

“Ok, so she’s been nervous, she visits a shop with all kinds of things for a wedding. Could it be that she’s working up the courage to propose?”

“No… I don’t think so. Do you think that could be it?” Wanda says.

“I think based on everything I’ve seen and heard about Y/N, that makes a lot more sense than her cheating on you” Laura shrugs her shoulders. “Look, just tell her you saw her. I’m sure there’s a perfectly reasonable explanation”

“But what if she is proposing and I ruin the surprise?” Wanda pouts, torn between what to do.

“Let’s get to work, I’m sure you’ll figure out what to do” Laura tries to divert the conversation, which works for a little while.

Except, she’s typing and Wanda is just doodling instead of creating sketches.

“Would you say yes?” Laura asks, amused at Wanda’s enamoured look.

The woman shrugs her shoulders, biting her lip as she imagines what it would be like to be married to you.

Needless to say, she doesn’t get much work done after that.

—

The flowers might be too much, but you rather be on the safe side. Wanda never replied to your text, so you drove straight home as soon as you came back from the dress fitting.

“Honey, I’m home” you joke, leaving your winter jacket and scarf at the coathanger. To your surprise, Wanda is sitting at the kitchen counter, looking conflicted.

“Hey” she says, letting you kiss her cheek. “What is this?”

“My favorite girl’s favorite flowers” you sit next to her, worried. “Is something wrong? I know you wanted to talk”

“Yes. I…” she takes a deep breath and turns to look at you. “Is something going on between you and Carol?”

“What? Is that what you wanted to talk about?” you say, confused. Where is this coming from?

“No. I was at the cafeteria around Bleeker Street and saw you with her” she admits, sighing.

“Wanda, I’m sorry. No, nothing’s going on. Carol and Maria are getting married and she asked me to be her bridesmaid. I said yes, before even thinking about consulting you. I guess I didn’t even know how to bring it up. I know our past… makes things weird”

You hesitate about reaching out for her hand, but then she lets out a laugh.

“I was about to ran over Danvers’ bike” she says, bringing her hand to her chest. “I’m sorry for not trusting you”

“No, I’m the only one who should be apoligizing. I should have told you. Can you please forgive me, love of my life?”

“There’s nothing to forgive”

“You know, you should play hard to get” you point out, your arms around her middle, placing a kiss against her temple. “Don’t forgive me so easily, I was planning on taking you out to a fancy place to earn it”

“Mmm, you’re right. I’m too forgiving” she jokes.

“Wait, you sent me the text before I left with Carol. So that wasn’t what you wanted to talk about” you suddenly remember.

Going back to face her, you lift Wanda’s chin with your hand, making her look at you. She seems suddenly nervous.

“I was thinking… you don’t have to answer right now. And also, with this new book, I might be too busy and the house will be a mess for a while and you don’t wanna be around for it, you want your own space… forget I even asked”

She’s rambling, so you craddle her face in your hands, making her stop with your lips on hers.

“You haven’t even asked anything” you nudge your nose against her, smiling lovingly at the way she melts against your touch.

“Move in with me. Us”

“What?”

Never in a million years would you have guessed this was coming.

“This is your home as much as it is ours. I want you here all the time, I want to make room for your stuff, look for my clothes in the closet and stumble upon your scrubs” Wanda says. “Either way, you spend more time here than at your own place. You could also save some rent money”

“You had me at this is your home, my love” you laugh, kissing her again. “And no worries, no wet towels in the bathroom, I promise”

“We have a deal” she smiles against your lips, heart beating faster at this new step you’re taking together.

—

You should have listened to that Kondo lady when she was all the rage. Your house is full of crap, and none of it brings joy. Only dust and boxes that get in the way of packing.

Good news, it’s gonna be an easy move. All you have are clothes, books, some records and pictures.

“Are you sure you wanna throw this stuff?” Wanda says, holding a couple of trophies from Science Fairs and other stuff.

“Yes, baby” you nod, handing over a box. “I don’t think that has any value to my career as a surgeon”

“I think they’re cute. You were a nerd”

“Yeah, that I was” you smile. You keep digging through old boxes, until you get to one you hadn’t seen in a long time.

“What is this?” Wanda kneels next to you. She sees the picture you’re holding. “Is that your dad? Oh my God, you look exactly like him”

“Yeah, two peas in a pod” you laugh, admiring your matching Halloween outfits. Ghostbusters, obviously. You flip through the album, grateful that you had the sense to take it with you after you left for college. You know your mother would have thrown it in the trash.

“Why isn’t this in a frame?” Wanda takes a lose photo of you two during Christmas.

“I guess I never got around to doing it” you shrug your shoulders. There’s a tin box, and you kinda wished you hadn’t opened it. A broken wrist watch is the only thing inside it. “He loved this watch. Was wearing it on the day of the accident” you mutter, suddenly feeling small.

Wanda let’s you sit in silence for a few minutes and then places her hand on your shoulder.

“We can take a break from all the packing, yes?”

“Yeah, ok” you nod, standing up. Wanda takes your hand and leads you back to her -and now your- place. There are already several boxes in the living room of your new home.

Home, that word fits so well with how you feel here.

The only other time where you felt like you belonged was in college, in the dorm you shared with Darcy and then at the hospital, which wasn’t strictly a home.

Without saying anything, Wanda pulls you to the couch, and you let her rest her head against your chest as you watch “Golden Girls”. She had you to thank for introducing her to a whole new obsession.

“Shouldn’t we go pick up the kids now?” you say after a while, looking at the hour.

“Sharon is driving them here”

“Now she’s your best friend”

“I’m sure she only offered to see you again and annoy me” Wanda chuckles, looking up at you. “Unfortunately for her, I don’t share”

“Mmhm” you smile against her lips, enjoying her possesiveness.

By the time Sharon drops off the kids, Wanda’s shown you how she really feels about sharing, making sure there’s a visible mark on your neck as you walk out of the house to greet Tommy and Billy.

“Hey, Y/N” Sharon says, playing with her sunglasses.

“H-hi, Sharon. How are you doing?”

“Oh, you know. Enjoying the cold days, wishing I had someone to warm me up”

“Yeah, it’s cold. Outside, and inside too if you don’t have any heating” you mumble, trying to end the conversation. “Stay hot. I mean, warm. And thanks for dropping off the kids”

“My pleasure”

Sprinting back home, you lock the door and lean against it, hoping you won’t have to talk to the woman in a very long time.

“I see that little mark on your collarbone wasn’t enough. Maybe I should leave more on your neck” Wanda taunts.

“Baby, I could tattoo your name across my forehead and that woman would still try to get in my pants” you sigh, hands resting on Wanda’s hips. “Are we telling the kids about me moving in?”

“Yeah, come on”

Billy and Tommy are in the backyard, throwing a ball that Sparky chases around. They both approach you as Wanda calls for them, and she kneels to be at eye level with them.

“Boys, we have news. Y/N is moving”

“What? Where? You’re not gonna have your house across the street?”

“Mama, we should all live together” Tommy says, pleading to his mother.

“Oh, my darling boys, Y/N is gonna move with us! We’ll all live here. What do you think about it?”

“Yaaay” they run towards you, talking as fast as they can.

“I’ll make room in my drawers for you!”

“You can take one of my shelves”

Each kid takes turns on ideas to make room for you, and you hug them closer.

“I’m sure we’ll find a place for all my stuff. Don’t worry about it, I’m just happy you want me to live here”

“We do” Billy says, and then he turns to his mother. “Can we please get pizza to celebrate, pleaaase?”

“Yes, can we?” you join, pouting.

Wanda rolls her eyes, laughing.

“I can’t believe I set myself up. Now it’s three children against one of me”

“You love us” you say, standing up and pulling her in for a kiss.

Wanda smiles against your lips.

“I do”

—

You’re buzzing with excitement to tell everyone the news, but you want Darcy to be the first to know.

While you sit in the cafeteria, the perfect oportunity presents itself.

“Ugh, one of your presents will arrive too late for me to wrap it up. I’ll send it but you have to promise you won’t open it”

“Yeah, yeah. Just send it home”

“No. I’ll send it to Wanda instead. She’ll keep it away from you”

“Same thing. Home for me, her. But I won’t open it” you smile as you take a bite of your sandwich, waiting for Darcy to understand what you mean.

“You? And her? Moving in together?” this is the first time that you see Darcy so excited over your relationship, and she hugs you. “You’re not gonna die alone”

“Oh, shut it”

“What are we celebrating?” Carol says, taking a seat next to you.

“Y/N and Wanda are moving in together” Darcy says, practically singing. “And now I have to rethink my second present”

“Why do you give her two Christmas presents?” Carol looks between you two and Darcy gasps.

“She saw you naked but didn’t tell her about your birthday?”

“Eh, what can I say? I have intimacy issues” you shrug your shoulders, laughing as Carol catches up with everything.

“Your birthday is on Christmas Eve”

“That’s correct” you nod. Eager to change the subject, you ask about the wedding. Lunch is cut short as they’re both paged and you walk back to the front desk, dropping off some paperwork about discharges and patient forms.

You’ve been talking for a bit with the nurses when you feel someone stand behind you.

A beautiful redhead with striking green eyes smiles at you, and it takes you a moment to notice you’re staring.

“Hi. How can we help you?” you say, pulling the charts close to your chest, pretending to be casual.

“I’m looking for an old friend”

“Sure thing, do you know his room number?”

“I know his name. Nick Fury” she says with a smirk and you laugh.

“Oh, the Chief. He should be in his office reviewing schedules right about now. Just go upstairs and turn rigt” you point behind her.

“Thank you, Doctor…” she leans forward to read the name on your badge. “Y/L/N”

You’re about to ask her name when you’re paged.

911.

“My pleasure. Enjoy your reunion with the Chief” you excuse yourself, going back to the ER.

As a group of people involved in a car crash arrive, everything that just happened becomes irrelevant.

You have no idea how crazy your day is about to get.

—

“Let me see if I understand” Fury says, the tips of his fingers aligning as Natasha looks from the other side of her desk, impassive.

She’s got a poker face that no one can break, not even someone as respected as Nicholas Fury.

“You want to teach us the new surgical method your mother invented"

Natasha nods.

“Why the sudden interest in sharing with us?”

“You’re a teaching hospital. Stark is on this quest to make everything accessible for everyone. It gives us good press, and will draw attention to your program”

“No ulterior motive?”

“The world is getting more complicated. The Starks and Romanoffs are the families with the greater research capabilities, I think it’s time to stop competing with each other and work together” Natasha says.

“Just like that?”

“Well…”

Natasha doesn’t get to complete her sentence, as Tony walks in the room without knocking.

“Chief” he says, a bit distressed. It takes him a minute to process the other presence in the room. “Romanoff?”

“Hey, Tony”

“What are you…? Ok, that’s for later. There was an avalanche in Silverton Mountain, several people are trapped and injured. They’re requesting aid”

“Let’s page Y/N and prepare the ER to receive them”

“Sorry for cutting your meeting short, I’m sure it wasn’t important” Tony winks at Natasha.

“I’ll be back later” she says. “Don’t be such a sore loser, Tony, not everyone can have a Nobel Prize”

“Your mother won that, not you” he says, trying to keep his cool.

“Well, let’s see if another Romanoff can beat you to it again” the woman says, smiling while Fury stands up.

“Children, not now. Call me tomorrow, Romanoff”

The two men leave his office, walking to the ER to find the head of Trauma.

“Is it a good idea to leave her alone there?”

“She’s not a spy, Stark”

“Her mother sent her for some nefarious purpose, I’m sure”

“That’s a talk for later. Y/L/N” Fury finally spots you.

“Chief, what’s up?”

“Avalanche in Silverton Mountain. I’m sending the chopper with you, Barton and another doctor of your choice”

“We’re only transporting critically injured patients, the rest will be taken by ambulance to local hospitals” Tony adds, while you walk back to prepare.

“Ok, I’m taking Bishop with me. Anything else I should know about?”

“Expect a long day” Tony pats your shoulder and you sigh.

Looking for the storage room, you find a three layered rescue suit, preparing for the cold and relentless weather of the mountains. Next are medical supplies, rope, thermic blankets, comms and avalanche probes.

Once you check everything’s set up, you change your sneakers for hiking boots and carry everything in a waterproof backpack. Just as you’re about to leave, Kate comes in. You show her the clothes she should change into, and what to put in her own backpack.

“I’ll meet you at the rooftop”

Wanda doesn’t pick up the phone when you call her, so you leave a voicemail explaining you won’t be reachable for a couple of hours.

As you walk to the elevator, you meet the mysterious woman again.

“Up or down?” you ask as you both reach for the button.

“Down. You?”

“All the way up”

“Going somewhere?” she teases.

“Just a helicopter ride. Care to join me?” you say, not knowing what makes you joke with a stranger.

“Perhaps next time. Take this one. I’ll wait for the other elevator” the woman says when the doors open. You nod your thanks and your eyes meet as you press the button. “I do hope we’ll see each other again, Y/N”

“I didn’t get your name”

“Natasha” the woman smiles, doors closing. The last thing you see is that cryptic smile as the elevator starts to go up.

The cold wind hits your face as soon as the doors open, Stark’s helicopter ready for the 15 minute flight to Silverton.

“Hey, Barton. Wilson?” you say, surprised. “Didn’t know you could fly these things”

“Hell, yeah. This is Redwing” he says, pointing at the helicopter.

“Stop calling it that” Stark grumbles.

Clint and you check for everything to be in its place and you nod as Kate joins you.

“I’m having everyone on standby, we’ll start preparing as soon as you call with more information on number of patients and status” Fury says. Then he turns to look at everyone else. “Stay safe and good luck”

The building becomes smaller as you fly away, and Barton chats with Sam for a bit about the weather and the rescue plan. You follow the conversation here and there, but instead look out the window and then to Kate, who seems to be deep in thought.

“Everything ok?”

“Yeah, just nervous” she admits and you nudge her knee with your hand.

“It’ll be fine, you’re gonna fly back with patients that need to be at Stark hospital. I’ll show you what to do”

“Ok”

As soon as you land on the area, a group of first responders run to greet you.

“Lee Jones” the team leader introduces himself. “There are six people still missing, we secured the area and will be starting a second round of search” he says, pointing at a nearby hill.

“Doctor Bishop, head to where the rescued people are to evaluate them” you say, and she walks back to an operations center with several stretchers. “Do we have a list of the people missing?”

“Here”

You take the paper, inspecting it. Two women, one children, four men. Your stomach drops as you get to the last name.

“Barton” you pull him to get his attention. He reads over your shoulder, alarmed as well.

“Is this accurate? Have you doble checked these people are not back in their hotel?” he says, knowing that information could get lost during rescue.

“Yes, sir”

“Crap” he says, looking at the hill.

The name at the bottom of the list is Pietro Maximoff.

“Come on, no time to waste” you say, sprinting. A couple of people follow you, and you have to remember the training you got.

The first 15 minutes are crucial. And now, the people who didn’t die instantly, will pass from asphyxia, hypothermia or critical injuries.

Except Pietro. He knows what to do to stay alive. You just gotta find him.

“We gotta let Wanda know” Clint shouts next to you, the cold wind hitting you straight in the face.

“There is nothing to tell her now”

“Y/N”

“Go back and call her if you want. I can’t waste time right now, Clint”

It looks like there’s a storm forming. If you’re lucky, you’ll get an hour of not so bad weather and then, it will be too risky for them to continue.

Not you, though. You’re not leaving until you find Pietro.

“Here!” two people shout at the same time. You turn to run where they are. One of the rescuers is digging through the snow, and a woman’s face is visible. You want to keep looking for Pietro, but you came here to help everyone.

“I’ll keep searching” Clint nods your way.

The second person they find is the woman’s child.

“Hypothermic, hard to say if they have other injuries. I’d recommend you take them back to Stark Hospital, call and ask for doctor Lewis and Rambeau. Wilson will fly them there” you instruct the rescuers.

“I found one, he’s dead” you hear through the radio and your heart drops. You race to where the rescuer is, praying that it’s not Pietro. “Male, approximately 50”

You take a minute, holding your side as the cold air makes it hard to breathe.

“Mark the spot so we can recover the body and alert his family” Lee instructs.

They keep using the avalanche probes, to no avail.

“You’re walking too far away and the wind is getting worse” Clint warns you, but you ignore him. Pietro has to be here.

“Come on, come on” you walk faster, the wind almost knocking you down.

“Y/L/N, come back” Clint says, this time through the radio so everyone can hear him. “Now”

You ignore him, looking around. Everything is white… except.

A spot of color. Bright yellow and green. Just like the gloves you gave Pietro.

“Pietro” you run towards it, heart beating out of your chest. There he is, you can see his face, and part of his hands, as he managed to dig through the snow to be able to breathe. “Clint, I found him”

Pietro’s vitals are weak, but he whines when you call his name. Everyone comes running to help you, digging him out.

“Can you hear me? Frosty, come on” you insist, inspecting every inch of his body. “He’s going back to Stark Hospital with us, now”

“As soon as Wilson comes back”

You nod, stabilizing his neck as the men carry him to the operation center. You hear through the comms that they found the last man, unfortunately deceased as well.

“It’s a miracle we found him alive” Clint comments.

You stay quiet, going over statistics and the list of injuries that could be life threatening and you won’t know about until you do imaging.

“I’m calling Laura, so Wanda’s not alone” Clint says. You should have brought your phone. He greets his wife, and a moment later his face falls. “Wanda’s there with you? Can you put her on the phone?”

Now it’s your turn to feel dread, taking the phone with shaky hands.

“Sweetheart” you say, feeling awful when you hear Wanda’s voice, knowing what you’re about to say will destroy her. “You might want to sit down”

—

“Male with helmet and airbag, was conscious during rescue and prior to boarding the helicopter. Heart rate weak, slow, irregular due to hypothermia; passive warming techniques started on the way to the hospital. No visible trauma, do a complete body scan” you say as soon as you land, Carol and Stark the first to greet you at the rooftop.

Wanda’s not here yet and you’re not ready to face her, especially since you have no idea on the extent of his internal injuries.

“Are you ok? You’re shivering” Darcy comments when you change into your scrubs, and all you can do is nod.

“Fine”

Thoracic spine fracture, comminuted knee fracture and intracranial hemorrhage. The room is silent as you look at the images, knowing it’s gonna be a long and challenging intervention.

“Wanda’s here” Kate says as soon as you take the elevator to the OR.

“Not now, Kate. Tell her we’ll keep her updated and then scrub in”

Carol gives you a curious glance, but keeps her comments to herself.

There’s silence in the OR as you work with Carol and Kate, while Stark and Parker deal with the hemorrhage.

“Doctor Y/L/N” Fury steps in.

“Not now”

“Miss Maximoff would like an update”

“I don’t have one for her” you let out an exasperated sigh when Fury insists, turning to look at Stark. “Do you have an update? How about you, Danvers? Alright then, when we know something other than his body is all kinds of fucked, we will give Miss Maximoff an update”

“You’re too close to this”

“No, I’m stabilizing his spine so he can teach his nephews how to ride a fucking bike and all you are is a distraction. Leave my OR, now”

You can feel Fury’s angry stare in the back of your head, but ignore it and keep working.

Stark is the first to break the silence, if only to ask for more suction.

“I’m done with the knee. If you want to update her” Carol says after a while.

“You heard her, Bishop”

“You should go. I’m sure Wanda will want to hear it from you”

“No” is all you say, voice shaking.

No, you can’t face Wanda now. You don’t know if Pietro is gonna make it and you won’t lie to her.

Beyond that, you can’t imagine what she’ll say to you if you can’t save him.

Why didn’t you find him faster? Why didn’t you help him?

This is your fault.

“BP’s dropping” the nurse alerts you.

“One minute” Tony says, eyes glued to his work.

“Stark, he’s crashing” you insist. He ignores you and you’re about to throw your scalpel and start CPR when Pietro’s vitals stabilize.

“You gotta let me work too” Tony says. “Peter, close here. Let’s see that spine now”

After three more hours of work, there’s nothing left to do but wait. While Pietro’s transferred to the ICU, you stay back, removing your facemask and surgical cap.

Carol stands next to you, without saying a word.

“If he doesn’t make it, Wanda’s never going to forgive me” you say, looking at the ground.

“You don’t believe that” Carol says.

“I don’t know. But I guess I’ll find out”

“It’s gonna be fine” she says, giving your arm a squeeze and you nod, leaving the scrub room.

Your hands shake as you press the elevator button that will take you to Wanda. The adrenaline is slowly leaving your body, but your muscles can’t relax, still waiting for an even bigger disaster to come.

Forcing yourself to step into the hallway, your eyes meet Wanda’s across the room. They are reddened by the tears, her hair a bit disheveled and all over the place.

Whatever you were about to say dies in your throat. She stands up, walking towards you, and you brace yourself for a myriad of insults and bitter words.

Instead, she throws herself in your arms, crying.

“You’re ok” she keeps saying. “I was so scared. I’m so sorry”

“It’s fine. I’m here” you hold her closer, kissing her head and shedding a couple of tears. “We did everything we could, Wanda, please believe me. Now we have to wait for him to recover. Please, please don’t hate me”

“You saved him. He’s alive because of you” she says, her arms still on your back. “I don’t know what I’d do without you”

“I’m here” you sigh against her temple. “It’s all going to be fine”

But you don’t know if that’s true.

—

Natasha answers the call as soon as she’s in her suite, knowing her mother only had a few minutes to chat.

“Hello, dear. How did it go?”

“It was cut short. An emergency” the redhead sighs, sitting in the bed and taking off her heels. “They used Tony’s helicopter and everything”

“The Stark boy, always wanting to be the center of attention” Melina tsks. “Did you get to see their ER?”

“Not yet. I did meet their Head of Trauma”

Natasha’s mind goes back to you. She was honestly surprised when she saw you waiting for the elevator in the rescue gear. You weren’t like any other of the Trauma surgeons she had met before.

“What did you think of them?”

“Very heroic. Jumped straight into the danger, no questions asked. And she yelled at Fury when he tried to keep her out of the OR”

Another pleasant surprise. It was hard to tell you had that fire in you, with those kind eyes and gentle smile.

“Do you want to hire her or date her?” Melina picks up on her daughter’s tone.

“Can’t I do both?”

“My darling girl, of course you can. When was the last time you didn’t get what you wanted?”

—

It’s cold and you can’t reach for whatever it is you’re looking for.

What were you trying to find in the middle of nowhere?

It’s dark, except for a circle around you, and there’s no way to tell up from down.

Except when you see something next to your feet, and you kneel down. As you pull from it, the snow moves and you can see Pietro’s face. You dig deeper, and then you see Wanda. Every time you remove snow, there’s another face, until you find your father, staring at you.

You try to reach for him, but the watch on your wrist reaches zero on its countdown, the beeping sound mocking you as you run out of time.

“Wait” you jump up, looking around.

On call room. You’re in the hospital. There’s solid ground beneath you, not layers and layers of snow.

The sound comes from your pager.

911.

Everything feels like an emergency these days. You’ve lost track of time, alternating between your shifts and the ICU, where Pietro is still recovering.

It’s been four days and he hasn’t woken up yet.

“What do we have?” you ask Kate, who begins to give you the overview.

It’s not something that requires surgery, which makes you sigh with relief. This is the end of your shift and you need to eat something before heading back to the ICU.

“When was the last time you left the hospital?” Darcy says and you shrug your shoulders, eating your sandwich and feeling ill the second you swallow.

You have to force yourself to eat lately.

“I don’t know”

“The day of the accident. Five days ago. You can’t keep going like this” your friend says, but you avoid her stare.

“Wanda is not allowed in the ICU and Pietro shouldn’t be alone in there”

“Pietro is unconscious. Wanda is the one that’s at home, alone and scared. I think her brother would appreciate you keeping her company” Darcy reasons with you.

You rub your temples, trying to not throw up.

Truth is, you’re scared that the other shoe will drop. That things between you and Wanda could turn sour if her brother doesn’t show any signs of improvement.

“You are carrying an immense responsibility and burden, that it’s not yours. Nor anyone’s. It was an accident. It’s life” your friend insists, knowing very well the meaning behind your silence.

You keep looking down, chin resting on your hand as a couple of tears run down your cheeks.

Darcy’s expression softens at that.

“I’ll stay with Pietro for a bit. Wanda is in the foyer, ready to take you home. Please, go with her”

You try to say something, but the words get stuck in your throat. It’s been like this for days. When it comes to work, you function even better than usual, accostumed to chaos and uncertainty. The minute the conversation pivots, your throat closes, making it hard to utter a single word.

In the end, you nod, throwing away your barely touched food to go meet your girlfriend.

Guilt overwhelms you as you notice the bags under Wanda’s eyes. It’s impossible to be everywhere and be everything to all the people that matter to you, but you still feel like a failure.

“He…” you prepare the update, but Wanda kisses you, stopping the words from leaving your mouth.

“I’m here to take care of you. I already know everything there is to know. Let’s go home”

Taking a breath, you nod and walk behind her towards the exit. The light hurts your eyes, and you have to look down, frowning. Wanda’s hand is on yours, leading you to the car.

The ride home is silent. There are still some boxes in the living room, pushed to the wall to make room for walking. It gives an eerie vibe, another reminder that your entire world stopped almost a week ago.

“Are you hungry?”

“Just tired” you say in a low voice. “I smell like hospital”

Wanda nods, closing the door and walking you upstairs. All you’ve done for the past days is take quick showers, with cheap shampoo that is in the hospital and leaves your hair dry.

For the first time, you don’t have to hurry and jump into a spray of cold water, rinsing as fast as you can. The warm temperature  and pressure on your muscles feels like a luxury.

“Feels good?” Wanda whispers against your ear and you nod. She places a kiss on your shoulder’s scar. You step back, trying to chase after her touch, and she laughs.

That sound is enough to make you feel ten times lighter.

As you step out of the shower, you admire the way Wanda places a towel around her, and without thinking you meet her in a slow and tender kiss.

“Missed you” you say against her lips.

“I missed you too, sweetheart”

There’s no rush as you change into comfortable clothes, and rest your head on Wanda’s lap while she reads a draft for Laura to review.

“How’s the book coming along?”

“Good, very fast thanks to your help”

“So, do I get credited on the cover or something?” you joke, looking up.

“I can pay you in other ways for your very valuable contribution”

“I’ll hold you to that” you joke, feeling sleepy as Wanda runs her hand through your hair. 

The next time you open your eyes, it’s past noon. You turn in bed, Wanda looking at you.

“Were you watching me sleep?”

“No” she answers way too fast. “Maybe. I… you looked upset. Like you were having a nightmare. I just wanted to make sure you were ok, that’s all”

“I’m ok” you promise, pulling her so she’s resting against your chest. “How are Billy and Tommy?”

“Quiet. I know they’re worried and they’ve been missing you too”

“We could go out to the movies today” you suggest.

“Actually, they have a surprise for you” she looks up and you smile.

“Oh?”

“Yeah. And I promised them you are wearing an ugly Christmas sweater”

“Is that so?” you turn her in your arms, tickling her sides. “I don’t have any”

“I got you one” Wanda says between giggles and you pull her closer as she tries to get away from you. “Stop, please”

“Not until you show me that ugly sweater”

“Nu-uh, you’ll find a way to get rid of it”

“Then, you shall pay the consequences” you declare, laughing as she distracts you with a kiss.

—

“Is this absolutely necessary?” you say, walking towards the school auditorium. The sweater is not exactly ugly, it only has some paper figures hanging along the arms, which makes it uncomfortable to move around.

The biggest issue is that Wanda and everyone else is wearing normal clothes, which earns you a couple of funny looks.

“Babe, let me get changed, I have some scrubs in the car” you turn around, but Wanda catches you and pulls you back.

“I promise you, I’ll make it worth it” she says in a low voice against your ear. The little kiss Wanda gives behind your ear seals the deal.

“Are you gonna wear something slutty?” you whisper against her temple and she laughs.

“You’ll have to find out, detka”

“Detka?” you repeat, your pronunciation awful. “What does that mean?”

“I’ll tell you later. It’s part of your Christmas present” your girlfriend says, biting her lip.

She’s such a tease.

“Show’s starting, come on”

“Show?” you say, following her all the way to the front row. The lights go out but to your horror, your sweater glows in the dark. You struggle to take it off, but Wanda takes you by the wrists, laughing while you look around, embarrassed.

The first number is of really small children, who try to follow their teacher as they sing and dance, but looking adorably confused is enough to have all the parents clapping and cheering. After two or three more songs, you finally know why you’re there. Billy and Tommy are in the front of their class, singing Holly Jolly Christmas.

“Those are our boys!” you shout excitedly, looking around so everyone knows they’re your kids.

“Baby, I think they got it” Wanda smiles lovingly as you take out your phone and record, zooming in on the twins.

Once the song ends, you give them a standing ovation, and the only thing most people can see is a floating figure that glows in the dark.

The show goes on for another forty minutes, but you’re the first to go find the kids backstage. As soon as they see you, they jump into your arms.

“You were amazing! Next stop, Broadway!”

“Did you like the sweater we picked out for you?”

“Yes, it’s so original!” you say, hearing Wanda laugh behind you. “Come on, let’s get some pizza. Or burgers and milkshakes, whatever you want”

“Can we go to Burger Galaxy?" Billy says and you nod.

"Sure, let me check if it's open" you say, pulling out your phone. You frown at the missed calls from Darcy. She's still at the hospital and there's only one reason why she'd call. "Give me a second"

Walking away, you dial her number.

"He's awake"

"How is he...?"

"Just come to the hospital" she insists. Wanda is talking to the boys as you return, her face dropping when you lock eyes.

"We need to go to the hospital"

You take the keys from her shaking hands, smiling as she tries to control her breathing. The ride feels like an eternity, but it's only ten minutes. You're about to head to the ICU, when Darcy sees you.

"Over here"

"How is he...?" you catch up, aware that Wanda and the kids are right behind you.

"Awake and annoying. A bit confused as well, but all things considered, he'll be fine. Congrats, pal. You worked a Christmas miracle"

You stand by the door as Wanda walks past you, speaking in Sokovian and holding her brother's face between her hands. Tommy and Billy stand next to his bed, waiting for a chance to greet their uncle. Between all the fuss, Pietro looks at you, mouthing a thank you.

You can't help the tears from clouding your vision. After taking a breath to calm yourself, you wipe the corner of your eyes and smile at him.

"Welcome back, Frosty"

[noodlesarecheese]

So Watcher is launching a Dropout (it's not called Dropout but they're clearly using the same template format platform thing idk what it's called, and the same pricing structure), and the reaction so far has been wildly different than what I remember from Dropout's launch. I was curious about why that was or if I was just misremembering the Dropout launch, so I went back to the Dropout launch video to compare them and I think I can see where some of the difference is coming from.

If you want to make the comparison yourself: Watcher's Video, Dropout's Video.

I wanna clarify first though that this isn't a knock against Watcher or the fans who are reacting one way or another or anything like that, I genuinely am just fascinated with how different the reactions are to what seems to be the same business decision. This also isn't a 'wow watcher sucks and dropout is so much better' I'm just using them for comparison because they did the same thing with different results. ALSO this isn't about the business decision itself, just the presentation! Disclaimers out of the way, here's the analysis.

Title and Thumbnail So the Watcher.tv announcement video is titled "Goodbye Youtube" and the thumbnail is Ryan, Shane, and Steven sitting on a couch looking serious, with a dark background. That really makes it seem like they're quitting (which, ok, they are quitting youtube but not quitting quitting). Viewers are already primed to be upset, and it's easier to go from upset to angry than upset to excited, curious, or neutral.

Compare to the dropout announcement video: "How the Internet is Ruining Comedy" - inline with other collegehumor video titles, might make you curious. Thumbnail - Big News! with Sam smiling and a bright background. We know its big news, but he looks happy, and the exclamation point let's us know they want us to be excited. Viewers are primed to be curious and excited.

Tone The Watcher announcement has 2 main tones. The first half is very sentimental, almost sad or wistful at times, and while there are parts that veer into pride at achievements, it's mostly bittersweet and sentimental. The second half is a bit more uplifting, but still quite serious. It reminded me of a tech announcement, like when they introduce the new iphone or something like that. Very professional, sleek, and serious, which isn't automatically a bad thing! But I do think that's not the vibe a decently-sized chunk of the audience expected or wanted. Many people watch Watcher for the cast's dynamic with each other, humor, and the more relaxed/conversational/friendly feel that most of the series have.

Compare to dropout - excited and comedic tone. Still professional, but also fits the expectations of the viewers. People watch collegehumor for the humor (it was in the name, after all). They also poke a bit of fun at themselves, which lightens the mood, shows self-awareness, and alleviates some of the bad feelings about paywalling.

Focus The Watcher announcement focuses a lot on the creative journey of the cast and company, as well as how this move will benefit them. Which isn't a bad thing, that's actually quite interesting! The problem here, I think, is actually more about what isn't here - a solid explanation of how this will also benefit the viewers and why the viewers should be excited. There's a brief description of one new show, and the promise that existing shows will get an upgrade, but we weren't given many specific details about how they'll be improved, and there's only one new show to tempt us into subscribing. Some people will be excited for that, some people won't, and some people will be excited but not enough to subscribe. Having 2 or 3 series (even if it's 1 fleshed out plus a few teasers of what's in production or what is being planned) plus some more details about how existing shows will be improved would've helped. Without that, it really does seem like it'll just be the same stuff viewers were getting for free, but now paywalled, rather than new and exciting stuff. That makes a big difference. I think with the fans not getting as much focus, this also led to some (accidental, I hope) hurt feelings. Based on what I've seen from fan reactions, all the talk about hitting the peak of what they can do on youtube and wanting more, translated for many people to 'youtube isn't enough' which became 'you (the current viewers) aren't enough.' Which I don't think was their intent! But I also don't think fans are wrong for feeling hurt by that.

Compare to dropout: They clearly explain how the move will benefit fans, and reassure viewers that existing content will stay where it is, and only new content will be behind the paywall. (Watcher clarified this too, but in a comment. It's not in the video itself, which is a huge problem.) They include clips of several new (at the time) series that would be premiering on dropout, including things that specifically could not be made on youtube (due to weed, violence, and sexual humor), so the reason for the shift is clear to the audience.

Advertisers Both videos contain the sentiment that being monetarily successful on youtube means working to appease the advertisers, and that over time what the advertisers want and what the creators want drifts further and further apart, putting strain on the creators.

However, I think the message gets lost a bit in the Watcher vid. Instead, it leaves viewers with the idea that the main problem is just ads are annoying instead of advertisers putting constraints on content. I'm not even sure what the specific constraints are for watcher, because they didn't give any examples. And the focus on ads being annoying leaves viewers frustrated because people typically either don't mind ads or they already have an ad blocker.

Timing and Size Okay, this isn't exactly about presentation, but it is still a factor that impacts perception so I'm tackling it. And I'm actually going to do dropout first. CollegeHumor launched dropout in September 2018. Pre-pandemic, but also pre-Sam Reich as CEO. The company was still owned by IAC. It was a Company, and while it wasn't huge it wasn't tiny either. So launching dropout was a Company Decision, a Business Strategy. Some people were upset about, but it wasn't a personal betrayal (generally, anyways). If I remember correctly, this was also not a high point for the company. They kinda needed dropout to do well to keep things running smoothly (which is why they shut it down and sold it to Sam just 1 1/2ish years later), so the sudden shift made sense.

Watcher Entertainment is a company, but it doesn't feel like one. Ryan, Shane, and Steven own and operate things, but they're also the faces, and they're youtubers. Which makes every business decision they make feel more personal to viewers, especially those who have been watching for a long time. They've also seemingly been doing well on youtube, which makes it more difficult for viewers to understand why the sudden change is happening now. They do talk a bit about it, about the company expanding and wanting to do things that advertisers don't like (which I've already covered). However, mostly the choice to start a streaming platform is framed as 'the next big step' without much clarification on why it's the next big step. Plus, it's post-pandemic, and a lot of people are still struggling financially with the ripple effects of that. Yes, $6 isn't a wild amount of money, but there have been some months where $5 absolutely meant the difference between paying all my bills or not, and I know I'm not the only one. This, coupled with a lack of clarity about why exactly they're doing this, leads to fans feeling hurt, betrayed, bitter, and frustrated.

Now, presentation and framing isn't everything. No matter how perfect your announcement is, some people are still going to be upset. It's a big change, of course people will be upset! But I do think a more careful presentation would've alleviated some of the hurt and anger that fans are feeling. While I do think a lot of the reaction we're seeing is due to the decision, I think (based on what I've seen) that some of it is also based on the poor communication in the video itself, and that could've been avoided!

So I'm gonna get a little speculative and describe what I would've done. In this hypothetical, they've decided to launch the streaming service and brought me on just for the announcement.

Firstly, switch the title out. If they're married to Goodbye Youtube then add a (and hello...?) after so it's at least obvious they aren't fully quitting. The dark color scheme of the thumbnail fits their regular vibe, but they want everyone to be excited so they should look excited. Next, let's lighten the tone up. Being proud of what they've done so far is great, but we don't need the sentimental music and bittersweetness. Remember, the goal is to get viewers excited about what come's next - so let's focus on what actually comes next! Talk about specific show plans and mention why they wouldn't work on youtube. Then, take some time to reassure the fans. Predict a few likely worries and address them in the video. Acknowledge that it's a big change, that it will take time to get used to, and that not everyone will be onboard, and let the fans know that it's ok if they aren't onboard.

Like I said, this wouldn't fix everything. There are a few differences in between dropout and watcher that don't have anything to do with presentation. Dropout launched with primarily new shows rather than new seasons of existing shows, and they continued uploading to youtube relatively regularly in addition to the content behind the paywall, which I do think went a long way to keeping fans happy. At this point it's unclear if watcher will do either of those or not. But, while I don't think it would fix everything, I do think improved communication in the announcement would've helped.

[topazadine]

How to Write Faster (And, Hopefully, Better Too)

Estimated Reading Time: 7 minutes

I've shared some tools before to help improve your speed and motivation, which include:

Using a word count spreadsheet

Working on only one WIP at a time

Leverage StimuWrite and Cold Turkey

.... but I still have a few more tricks, which I'll share now.

Why should you listen to me? I've written over 2 million words of fiction since 2021. That's a lot, more than many people write in a lifetime.

This is despite the fact that I also write 22,000 words every week for my day job. I do around 10k of creative fiction a week. And there's also the time I spend writing these articles for you, the lovely people of Tumblr, which is around 4-5k per week.

So, all told, I probably do around 37,000 words (creative, informative, and otherwise) every single week.

I did that by following these tips.

Separate the work into stages.

First, let's outline the stages of work (or at least the stages I use). You may have a different setup, and that's fine - if you do have a system that works for you, then you probably don't need my post at all. Keep doing what you're doing and ignore my advice.

But if you do not have a system, consider mentally separating things into these parts.

Active Writing. When I am busy doing the draft. It is both the most precarious and productive time; everything else related to books goes on the backburner. I am doing nothing writing-related but writing. No discussing the work unless I'm stuck somewhere, no making moodboards, NOTHING. This is my sacred time when I am in the thick of things and I put Writing Blinders on.

Percolation. I am done with the first draft. I set the piece aside and do other things like reading other novels, outlining another story, answering tag games, playing with moodboards, or putting everything aside and focusing on other hobbies. This is so I can come back to revisions with a fresh set of eyes. It keeps the story in my mind and can even help me discover new things I want to add.

Revision. After I have had a beta reader check things out, I go back and start fixing things. Then it percolates again. I repeat percolating and revising as many times as I feel necessary. Many times, I will have one beta reader look at it, then revise, and then have another beta reader look at it, each one getting a slightly different version of the story so I can compare what they liked or disliked.

Prepublishing. Most authors' least favorite part: marketing and telling people about your book so that they want to read it when it is ready. That includes stuff like making mood boards, doing tag games, sending out ARCs, setting up adds, posting on social media, and so on.

Again, ONE STEP AT A TIME. Do not blend all of these into a slurry.

I will say that this time around, with Pride Before a Fall, I ordered the cover before I was done with the book because I had a very clear vision of what I wanted.

Talk less, write more.

This is similar to the problem I highlighted in my Double Outlining post; the more you talk about your story, the more you trick your brain into thinking that you've done the work when you categorically have not.

Plus, the time you spend talking about your book is time you spend not writing your book. We can't do both simultaneously.

I don't really talk about my stories while I'm doing them, not even with my family. I may post a line or two, and I may tell people the basic plot, but I'm not spending hours discussing them with anyone unless I need advice on what to do next. Even then, it's more like "hey what do you think about this? Good? Cool, off I go."

Please get out of the habit of exhaustively picking apart your work with other people during the Active Writing stage. That can come during the Percolating and Revising stages.

Devote all your love and attention to one story.

Yes, I've mentioned this in a whole entire post, but I need to emphasize just how important it is to write stories one at a time. Working on a million things at once is not efficient; it's scatterbrained.

Force yourself to do ONE story. Just one. Not two or three or five. ONE.

Again, I've written 132 stories on AO3 (two of which are 100k+, multiple of which are 50k+), published one book, and written 5 of the upcoming manuscripts for the 10-part Eirenic Verses series. I am a very productive writer, and that is because I do everything one at a time.

Don't tell yourself "oh, I can get more done if I do a little bit on this one and that one and that one."

Can a chess player win three games of chess if they play all of them simultaneously? Uh, probably not. Each of their opponents is devoting everything to one game while their concentration is split between three different boards.

And you're not going to win either if you're playing twenty games of Write the Book simultaneously.

Do not mess around with moodboards, tag games, character questionnaires, playlists, etc, during Active Writing.

I discussed this in my Extremely Controversial Writing Opinions, but it bears repeating.

Do all of that stuff later, after you are done, as a marketing tool. It's procrastination, plain and simple.

Any time I get sucked into tag games or moodboards while writing, I get less done because I'm devoting time and energy to something that doesn't actually enhance my book.

It's one thing to do character questionnaires while you're figuring out a character, but quite another to stop what you're doing and tell everyone what your character's favorite food is.

Is that helping you get the project done? No, it is not. Log out of Canva. Turn on Cold Turkey to block Tumblr or Twitter. Leave that stuff alone.

Read short stories.

You know you need to read to become a good writer, but taking hours out of your day to read a novel while you're drafting your own novel can take away from your writing process.

That's not to say you shouldn't ever read novels, of course, but you can do that while you're in between projects.

During my active writing phase, I like to read a short story before I get started on working. This gives me inspiration and primes my creative pump so I'm excited to do my best.

Reading short stories also helps me focus on brevity rather than long-winded diatribes, which lets me pack more into a story.

Don't reread your work during Active Writing.

It's easy to get sucked into rereading and then not get anything new done; plus, this makes you want to revise, which should come later.

Reread only as much as you need to fix plot holes or remind yourself of where you're going. Refusing to reread also lets you look at your work with fresh eyes during revisions.

Make a writing ritual.

You need to tell your brain that it is writing time. This could be anything, like brushing your teeth right before you sit down to write, or drinking coffee out of one specific coffee cup when you are in writing mode, or putting on a playlist that you only use when writing.

For me, I light incense and ring a bell, then ask my muses to help me. When I take a break, I'll light a new incense stick (it's Japanese incense so very light scent) and ring the bell again.

That's about it, though I may write another post with more tips. I hope these are helpful to you, even if you don't like them. Sit on them, think about it, and give it a try. You might find yourself spending more time writing and less time just thinking about writing.

I've created a masterlist of writing resources that you can peruse at your leisure, all for free.

The posts I write can sometimes take me hours - they're always intricate, always thoughtful. This one took me about 1 hour to write.

I do this as a labor of love for the writing community, sharing what I have learned from almost 15 years of creative writing.

However, if you'd like to support me, maybe you'll consider buying my book?

9 Years Yearning is a gay coming-of-age romance set in a fantasy world. It follows Uileac Korviridi, a young soldier training at the War Academy. His primary motivations are honoring the memory of his late parents, protecting his little sister Cerie, and becoming a top-notch soldier.

The book features poetry, descriptions of a beautiful country inspired by Mongolia, and a whole lot of tsundere vibes.

You can also check it out on Goodreads for a list of expanded distribution.

If you do purchase my book, don't forget to leave a review!

Reviews are vital for visibility on Amazon and help to support indie authors like me. Whenever you love a book, be sure to let the author know! It's much appreciated.

[alexfromjersey]

𝓣𝓱𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓼 & 𝓛𝓪𝓼𝓽 𝓓𝓪𝔂𝓼

jenna ortega x g!poc

summary: it's jenna's last day in new york. jah contemplates a career move

warnings: mature language, a male

a/n: imma be honest with y’all….I lost all the creativity for this book. I was struggling to find a path for it but I found one and I hope you guys enjoy it. (Vc: sensei.klx on TikTok)

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter | Series Masterlist

THE NEXT DAY

"Our baby is big as a lemon right now. At this stage, our baby's intestines and vocal cords are developing. Tiny bones are also beginning to form in the arms and legs. This is so fascinating" Jenna gushed as she leaned more into your side.

You were currently focused on the intense game of baseball as your feet were propped on your coffee table. The two of you were enjoying each other's company until Jenna had to leave for London to film Beetlejuice 2 later tonight.

"Are we going to have a baby shower?" You asked.

"Yeah just a small one though and a little more into my pregnancy, maybe when I'm around 30 weeks" Jenna answered.

You nodded at your girlfriend. Your attention is then stolen by the Yankees vs. Padres baseball game on the TV. Jenna continued looking at the information the pregnancy app provided on her phone. Suddenly, the buzzer to your apartment goes off. You go to the buzzer, "Who is it?"

"Yuh Mada" Delyse responded. You buzz your mother in and unlock the door so she can come in. You then sat back down next to Jenna. A few minutes later, Del burst into the apartment with multiple bags in her hands.

You sighed, "Ma what is all that?"

"Nothing for you, some of this is for Jenna and...maybe the baby. Anyway, Jenna since you are leaving tonight I packed you a little pregnancy kit. I got you some prenatal vitamins, ginger & peppermint for any nausea you may get, and raspberry leaves for your iron and it can increase milk production if you decide to breastfeed" Del listed off.

Jenna's heart swelled at your mother's thoughtfulness, "Thank you so much Ms. Delyse. I appreciate this."

"Oh sweetie, us mothers have to stick together and watch over one another" Del smiled at the young woman.

"Do I get anything?" You ask.

"You get a non-cranky baby mother" Del replied to you.

You playfully glare at your mother. Del handed Jenna the bag of her stuff and sat opposite the couple. The buzzer to your apartment goes off again. You groan in frustration and confusion about who it could be.

"Who is it?" You asked.

"Davis" Davis answered. You buzzed him in and sat in your spot again. Soon after, Davis walks in with a flyer in his hand.

"Hey, Ms. Del I haven't seen you in a minute. How was Jamaica?" Davis asked.

"Wonderful. I needed that vacation" Del answered.

"I feel that. I need a vacation too. I haven't been on one in months" Davis said and sat in the empty spot next to you and Jenna.

"We should plan to go to the Bahamas" You suggest.

"Oh let's do it I've always wanted to go to the Bahamas," Davis said.

You then notice the flyer in his hand, "What's that?"

"Oh, that's why I came over here. This is a music competition, winner gets a five million dollar record deal with Passion Records. I saw that Twitter video of you singing, you should sign up" Davis proposed.

"Nah I'm good" You declined.

Davis looked at you in shock, "What? Why not?"

"I don't wanna be under another label. I've done it before and it went sideways. I don't want people telling me what music to make or getting the majority of the money I worked hard for" You explained and shrugged your shoulders.

"But it can expose you to different opportunities so you can propel yourself properly in the industry. You don't have to stay under a label forever" Davis said.

You sighed, "I don't know I'll think about it."

"Well, you better think about it sooner than later. The deadline to submit your demo is in two weeks" Davis informed you and handed you the flyer.

You read over it and the information on the paper. Submission deadline ends on June 15th at 11:59 pm. Any type of music is accepted but it has to be under three minutes. Five million dollar record label with Passion Records. You heard about the label, but before signing with the local one, you tried numerous times to get a rep. to listen to your music. You never got a response from them. But now you have a chance to finally pursue your dream of being a global sensation in music. A dream you've had since you were 8 and went to your first concert.

Maybe it would be a great opportunity.

"We still going to the courts around 1?" Davis asked.

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot about that. Sisqo owes me my $50 from the last game" You said.

"What's the courts?" Jenna questioned.

"Basketball courts around the corner from her. Me and Davis always play a pickup game with some friends from the block every Friday" You answered.

"Oh, can I come?" Jenna asked.

"Of course. You can see me whoop some ass in basketball" You smirked.

🤰🏻🩵

"Jah!" You heard Davis yell from your right. Your eyes glance at Davis who was getting pressed by his defender. You knew if you passed it to him, he was either going to lose the ball or shoot and miss. You were down by 2 and if the other team scored it was game over. You had to play smart.

You pass it to Davis but you sprinted behind him to shake your defender. You were successful and got to the corner where Davis passed it to you. You caught it and immediately shot a three. You watched as it swished in the net, winning you the game.

"Yeah, buddy!" You exclaimed excitedly.

Jenna clapped and cheered on the sidelines while you and Davis dapped each other up. She sat back down in her seat while you started talking to the other team. She was surprised she even sat through the whole basketball game. She was more into soccer than any other sport but pick-up basketball was entertaining.

"Mind if I sit here?" A soft voice brought Jenna out of her thoughts. She looked to her right and saw an angelic woman. She looked like a Disney princess.

"No, no go for it" Jenna smiled. She grabbed her book from beside her but she felt eyes burning into the side of her head. She looked and saw the woman staring at her with recognition in her eyes.

"My apologies for staring at you but I love your work. Wednesday is currently my favorite series right now. You also did your thing in the Scream movies" The woman complimented.

"Thank you so much" Jenna gave the woman another smile.

"You know I never expected to run into you in the Bronx. This is the last place I ever thought" The woman chuckled.

Jenna nervously chuckled, "Yeah...just hanging and watching some basketball."

She didn't want to deal with a fan's pressing questions. She knew she should've put her disguise on. But luckily, Jenna relaxed a little when she saw you look at the woman with recognition in her eyes. Jenna watched as you tapped Davis rapidly on his arm and pointed toward the bleachers.

"Yo Diana, I ain't know you were gon' be here" You smiled and gave her a side hug.

Davis, on the other hand, was staring at her like a lovesick puppy.

"Yeah I was just walking by and I saw the two of you. Thought I'd stop and say hello...hey Davis" Diana smiled at Davis.

"H-Hey Diana" Davis nervously waved back.

You and Jenna smirked at each other while watching. Davis is a nervous mess in front of Diana.

"Oh Jenna, this is Diana, Diana this is Jenna. The three of us went to school together along with her twin sister Stacey" You said.

At the mention of the name Stacey, jealousy flushed through her as she remembered the night of the Met Gala. The beautiful girl that was attached to your hip like glue all night, posting you any chance she got.

"How is Stacey?" You asked.

"Good. She went back to Spelman last week but she'll be back for summer break" Diana told you. You nodded, took a sip of your water, and sat in front of Jenna.

"Word? I ain't know she got into Spelman. What is she going for?" You asked.

"Major in Music and minor in Theatre & Performance. Same as me just at a different school" Diana answered.

Unconsciously, you leaned back in between Jenna's legs. She placed her head on top of yours and her arms on your shoulders.

Diana smirked, "Y'all are cute together."

"I'm cute all the time" You playfully said.

"Mhmm I don't know about that. You have your moments" Jenna commented.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa you gon' do me like that babe. That's wild" You exclaimed.

"All I said was you have your moments. We got our moments too" Jenna defended playfully. Diana let out a giggle at the two of you.

"Speaking of cute, you should holla at Davis. Don't think I don't see the way you keep glancing over at him" You smirk.

"Uh...I don't know. I just got out of a relationship, a bad one at that. I don't think I'm ready for another one just yet" Diana vacillated.

"You don't have to jump into another relationship. I'm just saying to you know talk to him and become friends. But if you don't wanna do it, that's fine I'm not gonna force you or anything" You said.

Diana glanced at Davis again who looked up this time from his bag and smiled at her. She looked down to hide the blush that appeared on her cheeks. She then went into her purse and grabbed a piece of paper and a pen. She wrote her number and walked down the bleaches.

"I have to go but call me whenever you aren't busy" Diana smiled at him and placed the paper in his hands. She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before walking off the court.

"I'm the best wingwoman ever aren't I" You smiled.

"Uh I've seen better" Jenna shrugged.

You suck your teeth as she laughed, "You a hater bruh."

🤰🏻🩵

"Tap, tap, and then we lock our middle fingers. End it off with a fist bump and touch thumbs" You explain to Jenna and demonstrate the handshake you guys just came up with. The two of you came back from the basketball courts and went back to Jenna's hotel room so the actress could finish packing.

"I don't want to leave" Jenna pouted as the both of you sat on the floor against her bed. It was getting closer to the time for Jenna to leave for the airport and she was having a hard time. The both of you were really, you just kept to yourself.

"You could always call me you know. No matter the time, I'll always pick up for you" You said sincerely. 

Truth be told, it was nice to finally have someone around. Someone new.

“You'll pick up at any time?" Jenna questioned amused.

"Yep. I'm an insomniac so 9 times out of ten I'll be up doing absolutely nothing productive" You chuckled. 

Jenna giggled, "I'm going hold you to that."

The two of them sat in a comfortable silence looking out at the sun setting sky. Neither of you uttered a word but your eyes slowly drifted to the woman next to you. The orange color bounced off her skin beautifully, making her freckles pop even more than before. You've seen your fair share of beautiful women but nothing compared to her. 

"Take a picture it'll last longer" Jenna spoke softly. 

You pulled your phone and quickly captured a picture of the actress. 

Jenna chuckled, "No way, you actually took a picture."

"You told me too. Now, I have an exclusive picture of Jenna Ortega. Should I sell it to these paparazzi weirdos?" You joked. 

"Do it. I bet you'll make a fortune" Jenna replied.

Suddenly, a ding is heard from Jenna's phone. She grabbed it from the nightstand and sighed as she looked at the person who texted her.

Nancy The Manager: we're outside

Jenna pouted as she read the message. She was hoping she got at least another hour with you but the universe didn't want to lift her spirits.

"They're here" Jenna grumbled.

You stood up from the floor and slipped on your slides. You grabbed her bags and Jenna got her airport outfit on. She checked to make sure she had everything before the two of you walked to the elevator.

After the elevator takes you to the hotel parking garage, you help place her bags in the trunk before you turn to her.

"I'm going to miss you" Jenna sniffled.

"Imma miss you too Hollywood" You pouted. The two of you hug each other tightly, not wanting to let go. But before she left, you bent down to be level with her small protruding stomach.

"Aight listen, it's just gon' be you and momma for a couple of months. You two take care of each other, if she is overworking herself, you better tell her to sit her ass down somewhere" You added, "Mama loves you and I'll be waiting here for the both of you to come back." You kiss her stomach and stand up.

"Why would you do that? Now I'm crying" Jenna cried and tried to wipe the tears from her eyes.

You chuckled, "I just to let it be known."

Jenna wiped the tears from her face and climbed into the SUV.

"Call or text whenever you land," You said.

"I will" Jenna reassured.

You then step back from the SUV. Big L climbs into the driver's side and after a moment pulls off. Jenna blew you a kiss which you caught and you waited until you couldn't see them anymore to walk to your car and eventually left the hotel.

The journey to the airport was a quiet one. Jenna was scrolling through her social media, which is rare for the girl. Music was blasting in her ears as she didn't want to engage with anyone, especially Hudson. She was still furious with the male after the stunt he pulled with her family. She didn't even spare him a glance as she got into the SUV, which stung him a little.

After almost an hour, Jenna finally arrived at Teterboro Airport. She was flying private this time and she didn't know why but she was secretly thankful that she didn't have to deal with the regular airport this time.

Everyone checked in and was walking to the private jet. It was small and nothing too extravagant which she liked. She just wanted to get from point A to point B safely.

The young actress was the first to step onto the plane but halted in her steps as she came face to face with someone she didn't want to see.

"Ah, nice to see you again Jenna. It's been a long time" Corneilo smiled at the girl.

Jenna looked behind her at Nancy and Hudson and saw the same shocked look on their faces.

"Please settle down and let's prepare for take-off," Neil said and pointed to the seat in front of him.

Jenna hesitated before slowly sitting in the seat in front of him, "You usually don't do in-person meetings."

"Yeah, but we have much to discuss. Things that couldn't be said over a video chat" Neil shrugged.

Nancy and Hudson hurriedly took a seat behind the two. Jenna was on edge, she was tense in her seat and she wanted nothing more than to be in your comfort again.

"Champagne?" Neil offered.

"No I'm good" Jenna declined.

The Cuban man nodded and down his glass of champagne before pouring himself another.

"What do we have to discuss?" Jenna asked impatiently.

Neil grinned, "I'm sure you know Jenna."

Jenna unconsciously hooked her arms around her stomach. She knew the man in front of her was unpredictable, she needed to be on guard the whole time.

"Do you remember why the court signed that paper Jenna?" Neil questioned.

"Because they wanted to keep the tradition going of a man ruling over a woman's life" Jenna retorted.

Neil let out a breathy laugh, "No...it's because you're reckless. That paper was designed to save you. Save you from the destructive road you were speeding down. The same road you found yourself back on."

Jenna didn't respond to him, just glared at him.

"20 years old and pregnant with a child by a talentless rat from the hood at the top of her career. Do you know how that makes me look? That I can't keep my clients in check because they do whatever they want to" Neil hissed.

"I care less about how it makes you look" Jenna snapped at the older man.

This makes Neil snap, at the speed of lighting he reaches over the table and grabs Jenna by her throat. Jenna tried to pull his hand away from her but was unsuccessful.

"You seem to forget who's in charge here. I'm the one in charge. I have the final say in what you can and cannot do, and who you can and cannot be with. I own you, Jenna. So when I tell you to jump, you ask how high. No sassy comeback, no attitude. Nothing." Neil snarled.

“Let her go Neil” Hudson glared at the older boy.

Neil’s eyes then snapped to Hudson. He let go of Jenna who was breathing heavily with tears running down her face. The older male then made his way to Hudson. He stopped just a breath away from him.

“Little Hudson Maverick, rich daddy’s boy that doesn’t know when to mind his business. A flaw of his that’s going to get him into some trouble in the future. How is mommy doing by the way? She still seeing that private exercise trainer on Thursdays and Saturdays during your father’s meetings?” Neil taunted the boy.

Nancy stood up from her seat, “That’s enough Corneilo.”

Neil then turned to look at the woman with a smirk on his face. He opens his mouth to say something but an alarm goes off on his watch.

“Hmph, dodge a bullet there Nancy” Neil commented. He smoothed out his suit and looked at them with a smile, "Enjoy the flight." He then left the private jet.

Once he left, Nancy slid next to Jenna. The young actress then gripped her shirt as she sobbed into her side.

a/n: y’all going to hate me…and possibly not hate me a little bit after 🙂

taglist: @grandpatrolnut @raven-ss @fanboy7794 @morganismspam23 @cinffy23 @darklron @cheesybacon1 @octavias-next-meat-bite @playboysaleen @niqmandu @zaclewiss @yescruzzzzzzz @silentfor @gemz5 @alwaysdangerouschild @onceblinkarmyandmore @melonfruit442 @zataracloud @nepobaby08 @jennasslut @rimaybank @jaewu @j3nc0re

[mikuni14]

I know I keep talking about Tharn and how wonderful he is, but I also have to say something about Phaya. Who is, on reflection, a perfect example of a "manly man"✨, the main character of an action movies, who works for me for once. He's also one of the few action/adventure/crime MLs that I find really hot and attractive, something other productions almost never achieve. Why? Because - I say this only from my perspective - what the producers THINK will be attractive to me is completely different from what I actually FIND attractive.

Phaya is a classic male hero, but he takes classic patterns of masculinity and reworks them in his own way.

Phaya looks very masculine, but in a way that I like. He's muscular, but not too much. His muscles were developed through martial arts training, sparring, something that is related to his hobby and work, not worked out just for being muscular. We see him determined and focused when he goes through training, but he also has fun sparring with his friends, instructors, WITH THARN (that's a completely different story 🔥). We see that he likes healthy competition, that he has ambitions, but he is focused on improving himself, not on proving to others that he is better than them. Phaya has a healthy approach to his body, to competition and to sports.

I like that Phaya takes care of himself, that he tries to look good (especially for his crush), BUT AT THE SAME TIME he has no qualms about finding the most embarrassing matching shirts and persuading said crush to put them on and casually stroll around the tourist area town, looking like a funny, old married couple. Phaya has a healthy attitude towards his appearance and how people perceive him (he doesn't give a fuck). The most important thing is that Tharn is by his side. In a matching shirt.

I like how active and task-oriented Phaya is, that he recognizes his own or any other problems and just does something about them. Suspicious murder? Phaya starts ivestigating. Strange dreams? Phaya has been researching it all his life, now he's going to the place where he can find answers. Tharn is not answering his calls? Phaya doesn't get offended, he doesn't create scenarios in his head, he just goes to Tharn, confronts him and comes up with a creative way to relax the stressed Tharn. Phaya acts, does research, has no qualms about asking for help and accepting help. Phaya is a pack animal, not this lone wolf bullshit.

I absolutely love how open Phaya is with his feelings, with himself. Friends? Grandmother? The Abbot? THARN? Phaya doesn't hide anything. When Tharn asks if he's feeling ok at the festival, Phaya tells him about his troubling feelings, he doesn't hide behind a straight face and "I'm fine." Phaya is not afraid or ashamed of his feelings or talking about them. Or admitting weakness, feeling bad or even fear.

what deserves a special mention is how open Phaya is about his interest in Tharn - towards Tharn and the rest of the world. Phaya is like "Tharn, I'm so interested in you and I want you to know it". And if anyone else sees this, it's not his and Tharn's problem, it's the world's problem, because Phaya is too busy with Tharn, who is all delicious right there, to worry about the rest of the world. Phaya is a grown man who knows what he wants and currently wants Tharn and to be a good cop and solve the mystery of his dreams and he will not waste his energy and time on proving his worth or anything else to the world.

Phaya has his own life BEYOND the romanse. He has a job, ambitions, a family, a home, his art, interests, and his own personal problems to face. Tharn is a part of his life, a new part, because Phaya existed as a person before Tharn.

I also like how Phaya treats his sexuality, namely he is completely ordinary and normal about it 😀 No issues, no trauma, no internal conflicts, no "finding himself", no crisis. I like the fact that he is pushy with Tharn, and although I'm normally not a big fan of kisses "without warning", it doesn't bother me in this case because Phaya is completely aware that Tharn likes him "that way". Tharn is flirting heavily with Phaya and they already had their almost kiss, so Phaya didn't cross the line with him. Besides, Tharn is also a grown man who can read Phaya's intentions, and he kissed him first - twice 😂 Phaya's sexuality is not a problem in this story, he is very simple about it.

Phaya is the kind of action hero that simply suits me. He seems to fit the type: he's aggressive, cocky, talented, smart, inventive, handsome and athletic. But he is also - in a quite ordinary way- nice, caring, friendly, supportive and helpful. He doesn't put himself in the center, he doesn't make everything about himself. He's also very funny, doesn't take himself seriously, can be a classic dudebro, goes to parties where he plays stupid games 🍾 and he is open with his feelings. He is naturally, effortlessly cool, but sometimes he is a bit pathetic and doesn't get everything right.

For me, Phaya is Phaya from the scene in the tub of icy water, hugging and supporting Tharn (because he wants BOTH of them to pass this test), it is Phaya from the scene in the bathroom, super sensitive to Tharn's mood, it is Phaya visiting tourist attractions with his crush and tucking him in to sleep. This is Phaya knowing when he can allow himself more with Tharn and knowing when to stop. This is Phaya who doesn't lie to Tharn, who seduces him, gives him time, gives him space, but at the same time leaves no doubt about how he feels about him and makes sure that Tharn is aware of it. It's Phaya intoxicated by Tharn's closeness and also coming up with cute nicknames for him.

Phaya is a classic model of masculinity without all the toxic, violent, stupid alpha bullshit, but with self-awareness, true personal freedom, the ability to function in a relationship, a family, a team, society, readiness for self-development and emotional maturity. He is a natural leader who can apologize to his teammates. Phaya redefined the male action hero type and I love him for it 💖

[exhaustedrebel05]

Whatever the weather

Arcane Viktor x Fem! Reader

a/n: Hi, so this is the first time I post something that I wrote, I hope you like it.

I do not own anything here except the product of my creativity.

⚠️Warnings⚠️: mentioned feelings of despair, chronic illness, fluff, new fanfic writer who wrote this on a whim, and possible bad punctuation.

Tell me if I forgot something pls

Summary: You bring food to Viktor in the lab and end up having a moment.

Definitions: Zaya means "little bunny" in Russian. At least, that is what Google told me.

And here we go...

The hallways of the Academy echoed with your footsteps as you made your way to Viktor and Jayce's lab. Well, more Viktor's than Joyce's now that he was more involved in the political side of progress.

Viktor tried to act like the absence of his friend and fellow Hex tech founder didn't bother him, but you knew that deep down it did. You could see it in the way he was returning to old habits of believing he had to do everything on his own.

Even though he did not, and was not on his own. Especially with his declining health. It is not the best idea to leave him alone for hours on end.

You all understood that it was better if they had a say in the decisions regarding Hex tech's future. In order to ensure that it is safe from ending up in the wrong hands. Hands that would use it to destroy lives instead of improving them.

Nonetheless, it left much of the work for Viktor to go through alone, but he never complained. Your beloved is a man racing against time and fate.

Trying to complete and discover as much as his delicate body allows him to. Powering through all of the equations and push backs that came his way.

However, he could only do so much running on maybe four hours of sleep and the academy's cafeteria food. Which is why you were here, at his lab's door, fully expecting to see him hunched over his current project. Fully focused. Tuning out all of the world in order to improve it.

Knowing this, you don't even bother knocking on the large ancient doors; entering the lab filled with papers and project pieces scattered in a sort of organized chaos throughout the room. And in the back of said chaos is Viktor, sitting at his desk exactly as you imagined.

As you walk towards him, you decide to stand beside him and attempt to make your presence known without giving him a heart attack.

Like you had nearly done that one time.

You swear that man nearly jumped six feet from his chair when you placed a kiss on his cheek. Thinking that he had heard you come in.

No response...

With a gentle sigh, you lean down towards him and call his name in a sing-song voice. Hoping to bring him back to your plane of existence.

You reach out slowly, twinkling your fingers in front of him. He takes notice, chuckling as your fingers gently tap on the side of his face - then his nose.

"Hello love," He says, looking up to you with those golden orbs that make your knees weak. He sets down his work and kisses your hand.

"Hi, care for a break?" You ask, showing him the container of home cooked food you had brought him. He turns his chair to face you completely. His focus filled expression turned into delight.

"Hmmm, I suppose I could indulge." He answers, raising a mischievous eyebrow reaching out to take the food.

You move the container slightly out of his reach. Eyes trained on his expression of confusion that turns into acceptance of your challenge.

"Oh, that's how it is?" He asks, amusement apparent in his voice and expression.

"How what is?" You reply nonchalantly as possible, trying to keep a smile from spreading across your face.

The amusement filled amber eyes became daring as a beat of energy filled silence passed between you both. You were not protected from what came next.

Slender hands find their way to your waist and tickle you with no mercy. You squeal and try to move away, but you are held in place.

"Nah ah ah! Zaya, you are not getting away from me that easily!" He states as he attacks you with another wave of tickles.

"I surrender…I surrender!" You gasp, breathless from your laughter.

He hums satisfied with his victory and pulls you close, looking up into your eyes from his seated position.

Your cheeks are flushed from his little attack, and your eyes are bright from your laughter. The moment eases his mind and body. He wishes the two of you could stay here, like this, forever.

His life is not easy. At times, the pain is too much for his body, and he wants nothing more than for it to stop. To find peace and freedom from his all too delicate state.

But then who will finish all the work?

Understand all of his notes and research?

Progress doesn't happen on its own, and Jayce has his hands full with his new role.

Then there was you…

He never expected anyone to have a romantic interest in him, much less knowing that his time may no- would be limited. That in the end, you would be left all alone...

That is what troubled him the most.

You told him you would cross that bridge when you get there. That you understood what it meant to love him; and he was loved nonetheless.

It wasn't always easy, but that is what it means to love someone. It is standing beside them when times are at their worst. When they are at their worst.

Being there to help them back on their feet and facing the challenge together. He also knew how fortunate he was to have what so many others only dreamed about.

You place a hand on his cheek and brush the wild tousled hair out of his face with the other. Bringing him back from his thoughts, grounding him to the present.

"Hey, come back to me." Your voice is as soft as your expression. Eyes gazing lovingly into his own, which were equally enamored.

He gently tugs your arms, signaling for you to come closer.

"I am here."

His eyes never leave yours as he brings you in for a passionate kiss. He doesn't know what the future holds, but he knows you both will cross that bridge when you get there.

[phoenixtsukino]

"Netflix’s recent cancellation of Dead Boy Detectives is about more than a TV show – it’s about the fight for queer art and representation.

In a world of attacks on queer rights and queer folk, including rising transphobia, Dead Boy Detectives is a desperately needed piece of queer art.

[...]

The show centres and celebrates queerness and tackles serious issues regarding violence, justice, and accountability. It’s also an exemplar of diverse media representation and inclusion, with three of the four main characters people of colour.

It captured a loyal fanbase, excellent critical reception and reviews (including a 92% approval rating and 90% audience score on Rotten Tomatoes), and good streaming metrics, staying in the top 10 shows on Netflix for three weeks. It was even submitted by Warner Bros. (one of the show’s production companies) for Emmy nominations in several categories.

[...]

Positive, nuanced queer representation on screen is still hard to come by. Damaging stereotypes and tropes like “bury your gays” – where queer characters are killed off to further the narrative of heterosexual characters – are still routine on screen [...]

[...]

Much queer media still focuses on narratives of trauma and tragedy, understandably so in some ways, given the prevalence of these experiences in queer people’s lives.

But Dead Boy Detectives stands out by refusing to be reduced to representations of queerness as suffering. It does explore trauma, hardship, and death, but it also presents a world where queer love and solidarity are mainstreamed and valued, and where even queer joy and creativity flourish.

[...]

Netflix has long tried to market itself to audiences just like this as an alternative to more traditional media companies. Yet its cancellation of Dead Boy Detectives is another in a long line of queer shows and shows with queer storylines – such as Sense8, Julie and the Phantoms, and Shadow and Bone – to be axed by the company before their time.

The showrunner of Warrior Nun, another of Netflix’s prematurely canceled shows, even revealed that Netflix pushed back against the writers developing a queer romance for the show’s second season.

Meanwhile, the streaming service continues to platform performers such as Dave Chappelle, who used his latest Netflix special (his seventh on the streaming service) to double down on jokes made about the queer community, particularly targeting transgender folk.

It seems, then, that companies such as Netflix are still largely only interested in token queer representation, and only if and when it aligns with ever-shifting profit goalposts."

@netflix

[blazehedgehog]

Why do newer pokemon look so offputting? Older games had tons of diverse designs but newer ones look unfinished/not well thought out.

They might be. I dunno. There's a lot people have said about Game Freak's competency at handling the Pokemon franchise and how they've added too many new Pokemon to some of these games and are basically running the well dry on good ideas.

But I also just see it as, like, an extension of the Mighty No. 9 problem. I remember when we were still all starry-eyed and hopeful about Mighty No. 9, Inafune revealed the design and mentioned it had "increased detail to suit HD displays."

So he's got all these colors and patterns and grooves and slots, when Mega Man was basically just a kid in his pajamas and three solid colors:

Light blue, dark blue, and skin tone. That's it. That's all you needed.

And Inafune further explained that was because Mega Man had to be this tiny little 24x24 NES sprite. I'd have to look it up, but it wouldn't surprise me if the sprite came first. I know it definitely did with Mario.

So this is like designing a character with the rawest, most basic building blocks you can get. You are not adapting the above character art into this sprite. Instead, you are making a character that has arms that are a separate color from his body, you are giving him pants to denote where his waist is, and you give him the biggest eyes on earth just so people can tell that's his face.

You have the smallest canvas imaginable and have to make sure people can understand they are not only looking at the shape of a human, but watching it animate in various different poses, all when it's run through somebody's crusty old RF patch cable on their 12" CRT TV:

Whereas, in theory, Mighty No. 9 is going to be played at its native resolution in crystal clarity on a 40" flat panel display, potentially allowing you to see and understand a lot more detail.

So now we circle back to Pokemon, and a lot of those first Pokemon look like this:

They had a box, 56x56 pixels wide, just over double the size of NES Mega Man, and four colors of grey to work with. When viewed on a Gameboy screen, these monsters weren't even two inches tall. Those limitations meant they still had to keep things simple.

Whereas now, increased resolutions and screen clarity allows designs like these:

Now the point I'm trying to make here is that simplicity and limitations give birth to clear, highly focused designs created to be instantly identifiable and recognizable at any distance or resolution. More detail does not necessarily make for a stronger character. You can absolutely get caught up in adding detail to compensate for a bad character design.

...At the same time, let's play devil's advocate here. Pokemon is a very different creature now than it was 25 years ago. A single new Pokemon design probably goes through this huge insane iteration process where all kinds of departments touch and approve the design so it can appear in the anime, it can appear in spinoffs, it can appear in merchandise, so on and so forth. We're miles away from the days where one guy comes up with all the Pokemon just because he thinks it would be funny to have a fat duck with a headache.

Maybe as much as anything, you could blame the increasingly complex production machine on why these Pokemon look like this. After all, even by the second generation of Pokemon games, they were constantly chasing the dragon of trying to find "the next Pikachu."

Everything has to be polished and smoothed down, while also showing the increased capabilities of the hardware, while also staying appealing to Pokemon's core demographics (there are multiples), while also being something they can sell toys and shirts and hats of, while also being noticeably new and different from existing Pokemon, so on and so forth, on and on and on again.

Having so many Pokemon in each new game probably gives them some leeway to experiment, but I'm sure some of these characters get beaten with creative hammers in the search of their next superstar.

On top of whatever qualms people might have with the state of Game Freak as it stands today.

[befuddledcinnamonroll]

Dead Friend Forever - final thoughts

I say final thoughts, knowing I will likely have many more thoughts to come on this series. Because this is definitely one of those shows that gets its hooks into you.

I file this one under "super memorable and engaging watch that I will never watch again" because I really enjoyed it, but also struggle with such dark material (and I can't stop crying over sweet baby White).

First though, major props to BOC for doing something different in the BL genre. This is the kind of creativity that I love to see, similarly to The Sign or Playboyy. It doesn't always work, and I know there are wildly different feelings about all three of these shows, but that's the point - if no one takes creative risks, no one cares about the outcome.

In this case, the ending actually worked for me. I was expecting something ambiguous, because a) horror genre, and b) there was such a huge difference in interpretations throughout the entire series that it seemed clear they were planting a lot of things that could be seen in vastly different ways. And I think the ending stays consistent with that.

I also don't mind ambiguity if it gives me a lot to chew on in metaphorical meaning, and wow was this show a juicy one.

That said, it definitely wasn't perfect, and there were plenty of loose threads that could have been tightened. But I still found so much that worked for me.

My interpretations

So here's my thoughts on the ending, speaking for myself, within my lens and my cultural context.

I see this as a story about purgatory. Not in the sense of any religious system, but in the sense of being a human, and dealing with human emotions. It's a story about the ripple effects of our own selfishness, of how lack of empathy and caring creates a cost for ourselves as well as others, of holding on to guilt, of what happens when we refuse to reckon with the harm we've done.

I don't see anything that happened on this current day visit to the house as a literal, real life, experience.

A few reasons why (and note, I'm aware there are people who will prescribe the below to bad writing/editing, I'm interpreting these as conscious choices made by production):

The road seemed quite well maintained and straight forward on the way in on the truck (and well used enough that Por's dad put a sign up there), yet when anyone tried to leave, they ended up on small forest paths or there was damage to the road.

Similarly, Top & New rode out on the bike for a while, but then New was able to get back to the house really quickly. It had a feeling of "you can check out any time you like but you can never leave" for me.

The Janta temple. This random big building with a ton of fresh blood and lit candles, yet no one else ever being around, and Phee & Jin getting locked in.

The drugs don't explain how all the hallucinations matched so well, or that they all focused exclusively on Non. You telling me Por and Top never did any other sketchy shit in their life? Tee worked for his uncle for years, but didn't have a single other regret? No glimpse of his father, of White being hurt? Fluke didn't get any visions of his parents asking when he was going to finally be a doctor and worthy of their love? White, the one stuck in purgatory because of his love for Tee, was the only one to have a non-Non hallucination.

It's also not really well explained how New could have physically done everything here - such as set up the trap for Por while hanging out with the other guys. Maybe he did, but he never confirmed Phee's explanation for everything that happened.

But my biggest reason for feeling this way is what happens to each character.

Por was used to being the center of the group, due to his wealth and status. But he gets immobilized and silenced.

Top made Non take the fall for him, and then becomes the puppet of the killer in this scenario.

Fluke always did his best to stay on the outskirts and not be seen, but everyone here sees his paranoia and selfishness.

Tee had regrets, but he was still responsible for a huge part of what led directly to Non's death, and he ends up losing what he loves the most through his own actions (he was the one who convinced White to come, like he convinced Non to work for his uncle).

Jin knew that he was violating Non by recording and releasing the video, hence his experiencing the same violation in his hallucinations. But the crux of his situation is that he had a selfish love for Non, and therefore regardless of how much he wants to believe that Phee's love will protect him, it's not enough to save him in the end.

And then of course we have Phee, New, and White. Three people not involved in the initial course of actions, but caught up in them all the same.

White is truly innocent, but sometimes when we love those who have caused harm, we pay a cost. That's the injustice of life. He was a good boy, and learning what Tee did hurt him.

Phee couldn't let go of his guilt for what he said the last time he saw Non, and for not reaching out to him in time. He knew how much Non struggled, he came in during a self-harm attempt before, but his pride wouldn't let him help Non. He also moved on with Jin, but won't acknowledge that there are genuine feelings involved. He says this weekend is all about learning the truth, but he doesn't even care that Jin released the tape. He wants to believe he knows Non better than anyone, but he doesn't really. He wants to heroically save Jin, but he is not the romantic hero in any of this. There's a disconnect between who he wants to believe himself to be, and who he actually is. And it's why he's not really free at the end.

And New. New is so fascinating to me, because like Phee, he was trapped in his guilt. But unlike Phee, through his choices at the house (despite regretting the innocent loss of White & Dang), through his passionate commitment to doing whatever he can for Non, even if it is far too late, he is able to finally let go of his guilt. He is at peace with his choices, and so he sees Non forgiving him. And I think New is able to move on.

Because in the end, I don't see this as these boys being punished by some cosmic moral authority, but rather their own choices and own feelings of guilt/refusal to admit to said guilt.

Reminder - I make no claims of "the truth", this is just my truth.

Relatedly, they did nothing to prove that Non did not fake his death, so you can't make me think he's not having a much better life somewhere with a really good therapist and a hot boyfriend (perhaps Perth).

Last note - the acting in this show was so goddamn good. Mio and Barcode were the standouts for me, but there was a lot of talent on display. I hope they all get a nice career bump from this.

[irregularmelody]

Hi, the following is a 643 word long essay about Null Baldi's Basics. Yes. It's me again in the trenches. I never left. If you desire to read it, enjoy.

Null might be one of the most interesting characters I ever stumbled upon. My fascination with him grew greatly when I sat down to digest what every single encounter and interaction with him meant. However, there's this specific detail that has particularly stolen my attention.

Constructing characters that are meant to interact with you, the player, is, in my opinion, a very delicate piece of work. Because those characters aren't speaking nor interacting with another character in-world, someone who's already set in. They're speaking to you, the one behind the screen, the one who has their hands on the keyboard and mouse.

Those types of interactions tend to feel more intimate because it's you who fills the role of being a character in said world. A blank state meant to be controlled by you and the way it happens must be polished for a pleasant, vivid experience. Otherwise, it will ruin your entire product.

Which is why Null is so brilliant to me. His entire nuance, characterization and interactions with the player are masterfully crafted as it should be because Null is a one time event in Classic Remastered. It feels purposeful - lowkey an irony, considering his departure leaves the player with several questions while feeling like that all the same.

Your average “haha, I hate the player” character – no matter how sarcastic it is meant to be – is bland and falls flat as unfunny and unworthy of experiencing them at all. If you do that, AT LEAST give them a proper and good reason why so. Most of the time it's just a “gotcha!” moment from the creator and it's… it's not good. It's not good, stop it.

Then why does Null, a character who at first glance might cross as this exact trope, work? Because he actually has his reasons. His appearances are focused to show and tell in a progressive, seamless narrative towards the player, involving them as the story escalates. It isn't Null coming over to tell you off out of nowhere, far from it.

Pushing the player aside as a figure of ridicule and/or mockery is a proof of utter lack of ability, logical and critical creativity. Especially when those types of characters are born from a metafiction setting.

Null's behavior seen in Classic Remastered stems from frustration, not hatred. In the narrative, it's understandable because the game makes it clear. How? Through his dialogue. With every secret ending achieved, we can feel the sensation of a story going through his dialogue. You, the player, are again and again warned by this mysterious guy who pleads you to leave the game because something bad might happen. It has continuity. His frustration at the sight of failure accumulates as you keep finding him. It does not come out of nowhere.

The player, naturally, is in their right to have an answer as to why. Why must we leave? Why is he the only one who's this much aware? You progress the narrative and Null acts accordingly with it. All of that combined makes his inevitable end hit a lot more harder when you pierce the pieces together.

Null never hated you, he was just looking for you and your safety but the player's unwavering will is stronger than whatever power Null possesses.

Aside from the crushing guilt of being the one responsible for his demise because he warned you and you didn't listen, he warned you and you didn't listen, he warned you and you didn't listen— it's an unique experience, one who tries to submerge you in it and it succeeds. The Baldi's Basics franchise in its entirety might be one of parody and satire but it still introduced a rich and unforgettable tale and character, which demonstrates that Mystman has a finesse for actual competent writing.

I believe Baldi's Basics Plus will be just as great.

[jokeroutsubs]

An interview with Bojan and Štras, originally published on the BTC City website on 13.10.2021. This is part of our series about Bojan and Štras, to promote the upcoming charity concert they will perform at together.

Bojan Cvjetićanin and Gregor Strasbergar: "Next concert will be the same - but even better this time!"

Before their second joint concert in the 1on1 cycle on October 15th, we talked to the frontmen of the bands Joker Out and MRFY - new stars on the Slovenian music scene.

Bojan and Gregor represent the younger, very unrestrained musical generation that is difficult to "put into boxes" based on their music genre. And despite being friends, they don't usually perform together. But that changed when they met on the SiTi Theatre stage in a 1on1 "musical dialogue". Their concert in September was sold out. But they already have another 1on1 concert coming up on October 15th, so we caught up with them before their new performance and asked them about their impressions from this one, as well as other performances they're still planning.

You will repeat the concert, which was pretty successful, on October 15th. How does what you're doing here differ from what you usually do and why is it easier - or harder?

Bojan: Me and Gregor are good friends, but we've never been in this role of a joint performance before, except for New Year's. So this dynamic that happened in SiTi Theatre was something new for both of us. I have to admit that we had our reservations at the beginning, because we're different and have different music, as well as different audiences. But those reservations vanished quickly.

Bojan and Gregor are good friends, but a joint stage performance was something completely new for them.

Does that mean that we can already feel some special chemistry in the air, are you making special connections, will you leave your bands and become a duo?

Gregor: Oh, no. There are very few new bands on the scene who are really doing and creating something, but most of us who are here get on well and are friends. There's a sort of healthy rivalry between us, we encourage each other to do well; but the frontmen of two bands making a good story together doesn't mean anything other than something new being made. Of course we're staying in our own bands.

Was there no bad blood in your bands because you two were the only ones performing, and they were more in the background?

Gregor: Actually they all came to listen to our concert. And our drummer said to me that he thought it would be "much worse"… (laughter)

Bojan: That's also what their drummer said to me… (laughter)

How did you get through this whole difficult period in the past year and a half?* I heard that you worked on gaining fitness by hiking up Šmarna gora (Mount Saint Mary)?**

Bojan: Me and Štras became quite the sportsmen, we really hiked up Šmarna gora a lot.

Gregor: Yes, we became real Šmarna gora mountain goats.

Bojan: And we had all sorts of similar traumas, seeing as we work with the same producer. We were all in the process of making our own albums, which with our producer is very specific and torturous. So we consoled each other a little and helped each other through this period.

Gregor: Yes, we had similar pains. But otherwise, the bands that did better in this Covid period were the ones where all the members are friends, have fun together, and are creative and mischievous. In truth, even this period could be used for creativity and progress.

Recently, they've often hiked up Šmarna gora together and became, as they said, true Šmarna gora mountain goats.

How much did the fact that you didn't have an audience to test your products and get feedback about the songs you'd made influence your creativity?

Bojan: We were lucky to have social media, so we could still stay in touch with them and see that people miss us.

Gregor: Yes, that's a good question, because when you're focusing on your songs, you can really check out the response at the same time on stage. And now that wasn't an option, so it was definitely a little different. On the other hand, maybe that's even better, because you are able to take more time for individual songs.

Who are your role models, who did you listen to? Bojan, we know Siddharta was close to your heart, and Mladenović with Ekatarina Velika wasn't; but what do you two really enjoy listening to, which great renditions make your hearts beat? For Bojan, is it Bob Dylan? (T/N: see the end of the post for some links and explanations about the musicians mentioned in these paragraphs)

Bojan: Not at all, I prefer The Beatles and ABBA, and I also really like some domestic Serbian "turbofolk" music. There are many different things that make my heart beat.

Gregor: Yes, I like the "turbofolk" scene sometimes as well. But in general, I'm a fan of quality music. And if something is good, I don't pay attention to its genre at all. (laughter)

And which of the local bands do you like best? Magnifico?

Gregor: Yes, Magnifico is dope too, but my mentor was Tomislav Jovanović - Tokac from the band Dan D. When I was little, we were constantly blasting Dan D in Novo mesto, and then I was fortunate enough to meet him, and he helped me.

Bojan: As far as Slovenian music goes, I grew up more on Siddharta, Big Foot Mama, rapper Trkaj, and I liked Murat & Jose as well.

Bojan grew up on Siddharta, Big Foot Mama, rapper Trkaj, he also likes Murat & Jose.

Who writes your lyrics?

Bojan: Štras writes mine.

Gregor: And my mum writes mine. (laughter) Well, in truth, of course I write for my band and Bojan writes for his.

Do you help each other with it? Do other band members also help with criticism and suggestions?

Bojan: Absolutely. The boys are always very happy when they can contribute something, and they always find something I couldn't have found on my own. Which is very good.

Is their criticism sometimes brutal?

Gregor: Our bandmates are our biggest critics. And they don't allow any bullshit at all. And sometimes I think I've written something great, and then they tell me that it sucks, and then I spend two months wondering whether it's true or not, but usually they're right. But if they like a song right away, we know that it's really good. And they will never say that something is bad if it actually isn't.

Bojan: What Štras said is actually the worst thing that can happen to you. The moment you start thinking that something has to be changed, you already know that you haven't nailed it. After that, the doubts just grow stronger and you can already feel that this isn't it. Band members and parents - those are the worst critics. For me, my parents are even more brutal than my band. They don't even try to sugarcoat their criticism. I sing the song to them as well, of course.

Gregor says that their biggest critics are their bandmates, who don't allow any bullshit.

And the audience? How would you rate their reactions to your latest performance in SiTi Theatre?

Gregor: Bojan drew in the teenage girls, and my friends and family came to listen to me.

Bojan: No, no, no. He's kidding. I think we covered and sorted the audience nicely, there was a wide spectrum of different ages, and it was really very relaxed, youthful and playful. Others who had already been to these "One on one" performances in SiTi Theatre said so as well. The way we were on stage reflected off the stage as well.

Love is a constant, inexhaustible topic that you sing about. But are you also interested in other topics, maybe some more current, socially relevant ones? But we probably won't find you in the crowd on the streets where you might be arrested, like some protestors?***

Bojan: They might arrest us on the street, but not for the same thing. (laughter)

Are you not bothered at all by the way the world is?

Gregor: I'm constantly bothered and irritated by the world. But we're oriented a little differently. I'm kind of a passive activist. I'm not going to tell anyone what to do, not even in my lyrics. I hide it inside some sort of a rebus, inside metaphors that even I find hard to understand. But most of all I don't want to nag anyone about what's right and what's not.

Bojan: MRFY recently put out an album called 'Prjatučki' ('Little Friends'), and the first song on it is 'Kdo bo rešil svet?' ('Who Will Save the World?'), which talks about love and opening up to each other. It alerts us to what's currently lacking in our society. Some sort of common love for things that connect us. That's our line of thought. I don't see myself in the role of someone who would write a song called 'Rage Against the Machines'.

Gregor: We prefer to take a step back. We've never labelled ourselves politically. We try to create a world that exists alongside our world, in which love and friendship are respected emotions. Our message is this: when you're tired of fighting, come take shelter with us and we'll caress you a little, and then you can go back and keep fighting.

They think that what's missing in society is a common love for things that connect us.

What motivates you when you're writing songs? Probably events and musings in your own lives?

Bojan: Right now, I've been writing songs that are either love songs or are rooted in introspection and finding yourself. That's really also what I experience everyday, and I examine myself in different situations. And that ends up being the impetus that drives me to write something. Nowadays, there's a lot of fighting and viciousness around us, and if we can create a world that's some kind of shelter for us and others to hide in, we might've done more than if we had become part of this army of vicious soldiers.

Apart from collaborating on the stage and hiking up Šmarna gora, what else do you do as friends?

Bojan: A lot of things. For example, we worked out together.

Gregor: Twice. (laughter)

Bojan: Yes, twice… (laughter)

Bojan: But honestly, I would say that we mostly spend time in Gregor's backyard, drinking coffee and talking.

Gregor: Only a few people can fully understand this role we've picked. Those of us who do similar things can help each other a lot. Sometimes it's enough to open up to someone about your problems and know that they understand you.

Bojan: We vent a lot. But at the end we usually realise that our problems are really quite "sweet". At first we think that they're the worst in the world, but they're always solvable.

Gregor: And Bojan usually has different problems than me. I find his problems negligible - and the other way around.

They mostly spend time in Gregor's backyard, drinking coffee and talking.

Can you be a little more specific? Is it about songs or something else?

Bojan: Well, sometimes we have a nice evening that turns into a merry party, and then we usually have differing views of each other's merriness. When I explain what a nice time I had, Štras usually tells me: "Dude, you weren't like that at all. You were totally irritating." Meanwhile I had a great time...

Gregor: Well, I don't find Bojan fun at all. And if he drinks too much, he becomes annoying. But it's hard to remember specific stories. Really hard…

Bojan: Well, we like to talk about girls…

So that's the problem - you spend a lot of time on girls, but you don't want to talk about it in public… But does that mean that your fans still have a chance?

Gregor: Always.

What about your concert on October 15th? Will it be different in any way from your last one in SiTi Theatre?

Bojan: No, it will be the same - but even better this time!

*The interview was published in October 2021, so the question is referring to Covid lockdowns.

**Šmarna gora (Mount Saint Mary), with elevation of 676 m, is a hill on the outskirts of Ljubljana that's very popular with Ljubljana residents.

***In 2020 and 2021, there were a lot of protests against the then-ruling Slovenian government.

And here's a little bit about the musicians mentioned in this interview, in the order that they were mentioned. Links go to one of their songs on YouTube:

Siddharta, formed in 1995, is perhaps the most popular and successful Slovenian rock band, and one of the bands Joker Out always emphasise as their inspiration.

Ekatarina Velika was a Serbian rock band, active from 1981 to 1994, and very popular in former Yugoslavia. Milan Mladenović was its frontman who died in 1994.

"Turbofolk" is a musical genre that originated in Serbia. It blends Serbian folk music with other genres such as pop, rock, electronic music, etc. Here is an example of turbofolk music.

Magnifico is a Slovenian musician, active since the early 90s, whose music is inspired by the ex-Yugoslavian schlager music scene. Several of his songs have reached cult status in Slovenia.

Dan D is another popular Slovenian rock band from Novo mesto, which is where Štras is from. They've been active since 1996.

Big Foot Mama is another popular Slovenian rock band originating from the 90s, the one Kris's dad Miha Guštin - Gušti played the guitar in.

Rok Terkaj - Trkaj is a Slovenian rapper, active since the early 00s.

Murat & Jose is a Slovenian rap/hip-hop duo, also active since the early 00s.

Translation cr: Joker Out Subs

[quinnslogan]

If they do a sequel movie a realistic plot imo would be the group going on vacation together. I think they could all get plots out of that and make a more group-dynamic focused movie like the original show was. And like super basic romcom trope heavy because I lack creativity. And they could have the different subplots be:

-Chase: Trying to find a way to propose to Zoey but things keep going wrong (I think we could get so many funny Micheal/Logan/Chase moments out of this and then trying to help him)

-Micheal: I think him being in his trying to get a gf era could be funny like him trying (and probably failing) with a bunch of different girls at the resort but then he ends up finding someone like super unexpected😭

-Quinn: Selfishly I want her in her pregnant era and trying to find a way to tell Logan but also nervous bc they’re both so busy and now they’re going to have a kid. Also, just random funny quinnventions please!! And her being herself like interacting with the dangerous animals/insects bc she’s not scared while everyone else is kinda thing😭

Logan: Goes hand in hand with Quinn’s plot and we get a super cute scene with him reassuring her and being husband goals 😭❤️ (while simultaneously trying to sneak away with her from the group and getting overly annoyed when he fails bc someone pulls one of them away). Also, I think if Logan’s dad passes away him trying to live up to his dad and start handling the company/be more responsible (like anthony bridgerton core) which plays into why Quinn is nervous about the baby (they’re both busy). Also, I require one scene of some random person attempting to flirt with Quinn and Logan being one drink away from knocking them out for that (like a my wife type of scene)

Zoey: She’s trying to get her friends together or something to spend time with them. OR she got like a job offer to be running a reality show production in some distant place and wants to have a fun vacation with her friends before she has to move + being nervous to tell chase about it?? idk i really don’t care for their subplot

Anyways just how I think it could realistically go for a sequel movie that will be more nostalgic/similar to the original show. You could have funny sitcom tropes like them being lost/stuck on a boat and that’s when all the secrets come out (quinn pregnant, chase wanting to propose, zoey’s job, etc) and they all get mad at eachother but they’re stuck together.

Also, a funny plot could be they run into Lola while they’re there and as sad as it is I think they lost touch with her bc like why wasn’t she at quogan’s wedding so like her reconnecting with everyone or something idk I want her back though!!

[luftgames]

Using the four pillars of play in RPG design.

Talking aloud to myself here on how to design an RPG.

As designers, we want to have a game encompass everything. The intrinsic nature to add on more mechanics for more edgecases is inescapable - but it leads to a bloated mess that is unnavigable and unapproachable. The more the game bloats, the more errors wil creep in, and the harder the game will be to play. Not to mention the fact that the game in practice will on average be about 60% by the book and 40% homebrew, and in the moment judgements from the GM.

An example of design without boundaries.

...So what do we do? How do we set boundaries that will help deliver the RPG experience we want to create, without being too restrictive? The answer is quite simple: Consider the audience.

An RPG - or any game (or product) for that matter - should have a targeted audience or user experience. Why would you play this? How does it feel to play? Who wants that experience? And to help define that, I would like to use the "four pillars of RPGs" that I mused on before.

There can actually be a lot of pillars. Like a lot a lot - each game may make their own pillars for specific key elements.

All games have Roleplay, Combat, Exploration, and my handcrafted fourth, "Meta." All RPGs have these pillars in varied amounts, and players focus on them in different amounts as well.

A player who focuses on the pillar of Roleplay will be interested in character creation, sure, but the hook for them will likely be the art and setting of the system, giving their imagination fertile ground to play in in the first place. A player focused on Combat will be more concerned with the mechanics - how one goes about interactions and "winning" the game portions of an RPG. An Exploration focused player will equally be interested in both the setting and the mechanics needed to interact with it - their own character is almost ancillary to the point. A player focused on "Meta" is one who spends more time playing the game away from the table than at it. This is the player who theorycrafts, homebrews, and has thirteen new characters written up by the second session.

So lets give these pillar-players some quick names:

-The Roleplayer, who wants to tell their story.

-The Gamer, who wants to win a challenge.

-The Explorer, who wants to find an experience.

-The Metagamer, who wants a toybox to build with.

The MTG classic Timmy, Johny, and Spike trio can also work - Timmy is an Explorer, Johny is a Roleplayer, Spike the Gamer.

Our roles defined, how do they focus us in on the design front?

Let's start with the Roleplayer. They live for creative expression - they want a unique character with a unique story, living unique experiences. First and foremost, art will likely be their hook. Seeing a book on a shelf and saying "I want to go there!"

...But seeing as art is the packaging rather than specific design, let's start at character creation. For the Roleplayer, this should be robust, replete with options to express a specific character. Giving rules for backgrounds, a full set of skills, unique species complete with lore, etc. One thing I would specifically highlight would be giving a character flaws - either enforced or by choice. Giving a character a hangup is an especially juicy opportunity to have dramatic moments of either overcoming or failing due to a flaw.

Once the Roleplayer's character is created, it's time to play - and once again, the focus is on expression - so having many approaches to a problem is key. Sure, a fight might be a solution to a blockade, but so is stealth - and negotiations, and trickery, and going a different route, and and and... You get the point. Making a tool for every scenario is hard to do - and it puts a lot of pressure on the Game Master (if you have one) to be able to think on their feet - so when it comes to designing, a lot of the work comes down on the rules behind the GM's screen. Broad, flexible categories and tables that can be easily adapted to any situation the Roleplayer may suddenly think up. When they say "I want to drop a barrel on their head!" the GM needs the resources necessary to say "ah, yes, so that would be a difficult task with an improvised object, and will leave them restrained. Here's your roll."

Roleplaying in and of itsself is an important part of the Roleplayer's repetoire, but it is not the only thing. When designing for Roleplayers a robust system of speechcraft and influence is good, but is still secondary to having a system that is flexible over all situations.

A Roleplayer may or may not be a Bard. They would totally woo the dragon though.

Designing for the Gamer is simple enough. They play to 'win.' This is the person that skips over character creation to look at combat, then goes back to craft a barbarian specialized in in javelins because it's "optimal." They will put the actual moment-to-moment rules of a game to the test. Flexibility is less important than optimization, and they absolutely will call you out if something isn't balanced correctly. This is the player who wants spreadsheets, statlines, and the functional mechanics first and foremost. A description of Goblin society is far less important that their to-hit numbers and special moves.

And a Gamer is not limited to combat - they will want to win anything that has proper rules - as likely to create a master stone mason as a master swordsman, so long as there is a system of rules there - a "puzzle" to "solve." So designing for Gamers is a mater of making those puzzles - clear, up-front rules that work together well to present challenges directly to the players. While the Roleplayer requires GM-facing tables to handle creative solutions, the Gamer requires player-facing tables to figure out the logical solutions themselves.

"The Senator class gives me +2 against people with a different political alignment. Your move."

The Explorer isn't so singularly focused. The explorer isn't here to express themsleves or state their mastery, but are here to find things out. They love the "aha!" moments and shiny trinkets found at the bottom of deep wells. And as such, they may well take the most effort to cater to.

It may be counterintuitive, but the Explorer likes to not know things. While a Gamer prefers all the cards out on the table, the Explorer would rather figure them out by trial-and-error. So rules that can hide information from the players are important. Rather than revaling a map, have rules for map-making. Rules for identifying magic items. Monster descriptions to present, instead of a stat block to reveal. Doing all of this essentially doubles the writing, as you need both the functional and the descriptive angles of all things.

Rules that further complicate discovering things will also be intriguing to the explorer - an expendable torch mechanic when going underground, weather mechanics that complicate overland travel, exposure mechanics for hazardous areas and materials - overcoming these obstacles to plumb even greater depths is the ideal gameplay loop for the Explorer.

And that's before considering all the cool trinkets and baubles that a player will unearth during their explorations - a full catalogue of unique places and items should be held in reserve to ensure that there's always more to explore, and to explore for.

Why? Because it's there, of course. Why not?

And finally we get to the Metagamer. The gamer that plays away from the table as much as at it. The player who has a mounting pile of backup characters every single session. The player who loves to ask themselves "what if?"

This player loves all the rules, all the charts, and all the fluff. They resemble all three of the other players at points, but their focus is elsewhere. For them, the rules are a toybox full of interesting things to mash together. Character creation is less self-expression, more an experimental labrotory. Combat isn't a puzzle to solve, but a showcase to put the biggest, coolest thing in. A list of items isn't something to be discovered, but a catalogue of things to order.

The Metagamer cares less for the specific moment-to-moment gameplay or optimal solutions, but more for the thrill of making what could be the biggest or fastest or coolest things that could possibly be. So designing for enthusiastic Metagamers is less a choice of what systems are necessary, and more a practice at making sure that all systems are linked. Exploration can give things that are useful in Roleplay, and Roleplay effects Combat, and so on. A Metagamer will gleefully run away with the idea of fall damage being added to an attack, even if no fights ever happen at the bottom of cliff faces - merely because a 300-foot piledriver sounds awesome.

My next character is a cybernetic luchador bear that can deliver a flying lariat at mach two.

I would be remiss not to mention the Game Master as well - as the teacher, and most likely the purchaser of the RPG, they are the first player you must woo over to your system. But other than making sure the game is understandable and laid out in a way that is easy to reference, there's not really any focus to give to specific components - a GM may tend towards the "Gamer" or "Metagamer," but they are as likely to have traits from any of the player pillars. So to make that initial sale, the focus should be on clarity - "THIS GAME IS MADE FOR THIS PURPOSE." Once a GM knows what the game is about, they can then ask if it fits their style.

The magic that goes on behind these three panels...

Now, most players are a mix of these traits. Rarely does a Gamer not have an element of the Metagamer. Explorers can be as much a Roleplayer as a Gamer, and in certain scenarios players may be all four at once. But by choosing a pillar to focus on, or at least prioritise, we start to set our limits.

If a rule or system does not serve to cater towards our focus, and is not necessary for the game to function, it should not be given priority. Does a game for Roleplayers need a detailed list of poisons when a simple "poisoned" effect will convey the emergency? Does a system for Gamers need four pages of background lore? Do you really need that system for playing the stock market?

There is no perfect guideline for me to present here. But it is still good, every once in awhile, to hold your system at arm's length and say, "Who, really, is this game for? And does what I'm doing accomplish that?"

At the very least, it's helped me trim the fat a few times.

Happy creating, designers.

[thana-topsy]

But actually where do you get your motivation to keep up with everything you do? You have so many projects going, and updating a respectable amount of them with decent regularity. All tips and tricks in the world can't keep me focused on more than one thing, and even that takes years off my life to remember the plot details even with notes. Is there a secret potion you're taking? Did the gods bless your birth and mark you as the chosen creative? Is there a hidden magical spring you bathe in once a week to purify your mind and soul? Did you make a dark sacrifice to an evil bog witch in exchange for the gift of productivity? Are you a mythical creature? Are WE disorganized folk the mythical creatures, and you're how the human is supposed to operate? What is the deal? How do you do it?

Man, anon, you ask fantastic questions, especially the part about the evil bog witch.

But this did make me sit here and think for a while, trying to dig through my mind as to what it is that keeps me motivated. And honestly? I think what it comes down to is this:

I don't see anything I create as "work".

Nothing has a deadline or a posting schedule. I don't push myself to make "content". If I lose interest in something, then I just stop working on it. (RIP that Hadvar/Ralof fic stuck on 4/5 chapters).

But! Sometimes I return to those projects I "abandoned" when I'm suddenly inspired again. I'm literally at the whims of my own elusive wants and desires, and there's no rhyme or reason to any of it.

As for the long projects that I've been working on for years... I'm glad there's the illusion of organization. Yes, I keep outlines and plot notes, yes I do research, yes I write every day. But I do all these things because I WANT to. Because I think it's FUN. (Also, my outlines and notes change CONSTANTLY while I'm working on stories... This is just part of my process).

So, step one: make whatever you think is fun. If that means drawing Teldryn Sero's face at the same angle 10 times a day every day for a year. Fuck yeah. Do that. If that means you come up with 100 stories that never make it past the outline... do that! Just make stuff because it's fun!! And then sometimes other people like the stuff you make, and it's extra awesome.

The creative process shouldn't have to be organized or productive to still be valid and enjoyable. This is why I call myself a "hobby artist".

[lover-of-mine]

Your blog today has been so eye-opening. I have not been aware of half of what has happened because the block button was my friend when the other side got so nasty. I'm still not holding my breath he's gone. But when you bring up what makes Oliver and Ryan comfortable. It's not so far-fetched to believe that now we know they hang out here they see and read us. And if they saw LFJ cameos creating the personal attacks on Ryan and the distortion of Oliver's storyline. Well, yeah. I can see why LFJ seemed so tense in those BTS shots where he sat there pouting after he spoiled the medal ceremony. Did he get a talking, too? He seemed loathe to engage with the cast. Maybe he thought building up a fandom would secure him space, and instead, he caused chaos. Because it's definitely his fans causing the trouble. None of us went to send hate on the pride post because we aren't that mean. I guarantee their side won't be kind when they post a Buddie IG soon.

Anyways... I guess now I'm looking at it more clear eyed. If Ryan, Oliver and Tim saw this going down I could see them pulling the plug. Especially if the other side tries to turn Gerrard into a Tommy centric story.

Okay, look, Oliver or Ryan alone do not have the type of pull necessary to force Lou to shut down the cameo. Someone talking to Lou after he spoiled the medal thing? Possible. Someone talking to him because every controversy in the fandom lately has his name in the middle and people keep using stuff he said to back them up, including harassing cast members? Extremely possible. Because here's the thing, a controlled ship war is good for business. If it wasn't triangles wouldn't be so popular. The thing here is when one side is getting fuel from an actor who's getting paid to say stuff that goes against the actual promotional stuff they are putting out. Oliver and Ryan may talk a lot about Buck and Eddie's relationship, but they never gave specific and detailed storylines that don't align with show. The cameos add a layer of complications that no one wants to deal with, because it's leading to cast/production members being harassed for not following up on shit they never promised. It's one thing when fandom chaos is just fans being chaotic. When the justification all start looking like "oh but so and so said that in this video" you have a marketing problem in your hands. I guarantee you that even if Lou wasn't told to shut down, he saw the light and shut it down on his own, abc pr people are looking into just adding stuff to everyone's contract to stop all of their actors from doing the type of cameo he was doing anyway because that creates a pr aspect they cannot control. So they stop having control of their own narrative. No one officially promised more Tommy. In fact most of the interviews we saw during 705/06 had them talking about how they were not sure if he was gonna come back because they were still filming, and didn't have all the scripts. The one interview with Lou and Oliver barely talks about them. But then Lou comes out in full gear talking about bt thriving it created an expectation that people are demanding while citing someone linked to the show. And even though he has no creative power, he's the face the audience knows. Most people don't know Tim's face. Why would people take him seriously when the guy they are seeing on screen is saying something else? Obviously, they're gonna try to get control of that back, and getting there talk would explain why he doesn't have the level of "goofy" moments with the cast in the bts stuff.

I do believe that if when promo starts, people start actively attacking Oliver and Ryan if they choose to use both of them together to promote the season, focusing on their comfort is more likely than ignoring it and hoping people will forget about it. Buck and Eddie are the main characters and I've never seen the show do shit that implies they want their cast to be uncomfortable.

And I don't blame Lou for the cameos, like, that's smart as hell. He upped his exposure, the character acceptance, forced himself into another season. I applaud him for using his tools for his gain, it's a business. No one told him not to do it beforehand and he went for it. There's a lot of shit going on using that as fuel, but no one could've predicted the CHAOS this ship would bring. This fandom has been a monoshipper fandom forever. It was buddie or die. I don't think anyone involved expected people to flip. So they don't know how to handle it. In the end, I guess we have to wait for the season to evolve.