#why am i surprised?? if they had an issue with it they would have fired him then

[tittyinfinity]

Wow I'm really fucking upset to see that my marching band teacher still works at my old high school after nearly killing several of us in 2010

[libraford]

It is possible to interact with people whom share opposing views and no this is not about pineapple on pizza. In fact, it is imperative that you learn how to be civil with some people who you may find difficult to agree with.

At work, Youngin would often tell me that the guy that trained him (Ginger) was a misogynist. I had never met Ginger, and I had very little to say on this matter. But I would ask Youngin some questions about him because I like to know the other seasonal workers a little. I ask about Ginger- first words from Youngin's mouth 'he's a misogynist.'

I asked him why he thought that. (There are many misogynists at this location, as someone that is woman-shaped I see it often, I am comparing notes.)

"We were on our way to a location and a driver was going really slowly. When he got around her he said 'fucking women drivers.' Like he was going out of his way to prove that the driver was a woman."

The last month or so, Youngin worked exclusively with me because I knew that it was a matter of time before he said something that pissed off one of the guys. He was not going to get along with people here, it just wasn't happening.

When he left, everyone wanted to know what he was like to work with. And I finally got to have a conversation with Ginger.

"I'd like to ask you something a little strange- he said that on his first day there was an issue with a driver going slowly. Can you tell me about that?"

"Oh yeah! She was going super slow and when I got around her I said 'yup- little old lady driving.' And he was like 'what's that supposed to mean?' And I just kind of dropped it, but I hear he was saying I was a misogynist over it?"

So I give Youngin some grace because he's young, he's got a social bubble that's very liberal, he has not met very many people that weren't part of that kind of scene. But he often talked about how every person here has said something that pissed him off and he seemed really surprised that I (woman-shaped queer liberal) would be okay working with all these sexist homophobes.

And I give grace to Ginger because he had no reason to think that his words would be interpreted like that. What he was saying was normal to him. This is... somewhat the culture of landscaping jobs. And its not even close to the worst thing I've heard out of these dudes mouths. (Literally had one of the dudes comment that he would like to 'motorboat' one of the pedestrians.)

It was weird for Youngin to carry that with him for the whole two months that he worked here, over a very... small comment.

Every single person I've worked with here has said something that has given me pause and I tuck it away to rant about later and then I let it go. If it gets out of hand, I talk to one of the bosses about it. I know how to contact HR. I came into this place knowing that I was going to disagree politically with most of the people that I work with because I'm coming in to a culture that is fundamentally different from my own.

If I am being frank, I find the overt bigotry somewhat better than the corporate bullshit of 'we value your contributions, but won't be granting your accommodations request out of fairness to other workers' or the glass cliff or literally being fired for my sexual orientation but phrased with 'oh you just weren't a good fit for the culture here.' I at least know what I'm getting into when I come to work. I know what not to talk about. Last time I thought I was safe to talk about something queer with my boss she blindsided me with some transphobic garbage.

Its admirable to stick up for the marginalized people in your life, but part of changing minds is knowing the time and the place to comment. I think I've changed more minds at this warehouse by being a visibly out lesbian at work than I have by making carefully crafted speeches.

That is fine. It is fine to disagree. Sometimes you have to work with racists, homophobes, and assholes. That is part of being an adult. You talk about things like... sports or TV or weather or some cool bug you saw. Finding common ground with people who are different from you in many ways is an important part of socialization and it sucks to think you have anything in common with a jackass but look- you're spending 7-ish hours with these people and at some point some of them are going to say stupid shit. You are going to say stupid shit also. I have said my fair share of stupid shit. Deal with the fact that you're all stupid shits.

And for fuck's sake, wear your hardhat.

[pretty-little-mind33]

Tangerine x fem!reader

Summary: Tangerine doesn't like when you go on dates. The reason? Currently unknown.

Prompt: "Why do you look so dolled up?"

TANGERINE MASTERLIST

BLURB MASTERLIST

You look at your full-length mirror, your hand smoothing down the maroon satin dress you're wearing. You look pretty, you think, as you turn around in the mirror and admire yourself. You smile and bend down to your vanity, reaching for your gold earrings, when you hear your phone buzz on the dresser. You turn and glance at the screen.

Tan: You busy?

Your smile widens.

You: I am

Tangerine's reply was instant.

Tan: I'm coming over.

You don't have a chance to respond because you hear a sharp knock on your apartment door. You sigh and walk over, opening the door for him as you fiddle with your earring. "You were already here, weren't you?" you say, raising an eyebrow. Tangerine looks tense as he looks you over.

"What's wrong?" You ask, letting him in.

Tangerine walks in, his eyes scanning over you even more. "Why are ya all dolled up?" he asks bluntly, frowning judgmentally. You're taken by surprise by the tone of his question. You hadn't told Tangerine of this date, knowing your best friend usually hates the men you go out with—only this time, he had no information and he was still judgmental?

"Why do you think," you quip and turn around, disappearing into your room to find your purse. "He's picking me up in ten minutes."

"Is he now?" Tangerine snarls and blocks your front door. "Who is it this time? Another prick from work?"

You roll your eyes and walk back into the entrance, holding your purse now. You're annoyed with his attitude. "Why does it matter to you?"

"Why wouldn't it matter?" Tangerine argues and walks closer, his blue eyes flicker over your form. He thinks you're gorgeous but he wouldn't tell you that, not when the mere image of you with another man is pissing him off so much. "You always do this and you always get hurt."

"Well, excuse me for not finding my future husband in the few dates I've been on," you hiss and move by him, wanting to wait for your date outside. When Tangerine doesn't move, you become annoyed. "No, seriously, Tan, what's the fucking issue now? Why are you here?"

He doesn't answer immediately, his entire body is on fire as he looks down at you. You really do look so pretty, too pretty for some random guy to enjoy. "Stay here tonight," he states, almost like an order.

Your eyes widen. "W-what?"

Without hesitation, Tangerine's hands find your cheeks and he leans in to kiss you. All that jealousy had built up until he couldn't control himself. The kiss, however, is gentle as he restrains himself just enough to make it okay if you would want to pull away. But, you don't. Instead, you pull him in closer and return the kiss.

Internally, you're screaming but you'll have to worry about that later because he's pushing you up against the wall, his hand resting under your thighs as you wrap your legs around his torso, kissing him more passionately.

Once you catch your breath, you rest your head against the wall and play with the baby hairs on his nape. "You were jealous," you point out, doing a shit job at hiding your smirk.

Tangerine's cheeks warm and he shakes his head, becoming defensive. "No, I wasn't–"

"Yes," you whisper and hold him closer. "You don't want me to go on that date. Say it. Say you don't want me to go and I'll stay."

Tangerine's eyes darken as he looks at you, his lips still tingling from your kiss. Admitting this feels like crossing a line he spent years pretending he didn't want to cross.

He let out a slow breath, his hands tightening around your waist as he pressed you more firmly against the wall. "Fine, I'm jealous," he finally admits, his voice low and rough. "Ya drive me fuckin' crazy."

A small smile lifts the corners of your lips as you lean in closer, your forehead resting against his. "Then say it, Tan. Tell me you don't want me to go."

Tangerine's heart pounds in his chest and he sees the vulnerability in your eyes. "I don't want you to go," he whispers, his voice thick with emotion. "Stay with me, darlin'. Please."

The sincerity in his voice makes your heart flutter. You've always known there must be something more between you and Tangerine, something neither of you had dared to speak into existence. But now, with the truth out in the open, it feels right.

You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him even closer as you kiss him again, this time with tenderness. "I'll stay," you tell him. "I'll stay with you."

Your date is quickly forgotten.

tags: @princesssunderworld, @tansgirlfriend, @brokeaesthetic, @earth-elemental18, @lqrlei, @longlivedelusion, @thewinterv

[q1ngqve]

hi!! same anon here you dont have to take this as a request bc i just wanted to get this out of my chest yandere or at least obssesive averatio where both overstim the hell out of reader (lowkey mindbreak if you're comfy about that??) after reader rejects their advances NOT OUT OF HATE or anything but bc their insecurities got the best of them and either thought the two were just messing w them or they have abandonment issues (i do not have the second one whatever do you mean i am not projecting do not percieve me) no offense to these two but they look like the ppl to mess w your heart n leave you to rot

mb some predator/prey (they both hunt you down after you avoid them both and as ratio wisely said "what do you do with a cornered prey? hunt it to death" AUGHAHSGA) aphrodisiacs, drugging, etc. anyways after that you best bet you'll be too dumb to ever think of something as stupid as that, and sure, yes ratio hates idiots but well..... you will be the only exception given how cute you look all fucked out and broken on their bed with their cocks deep inside you <3

SKLDJALSDJAL HELP i feel awfully embarrassed w writing this lmao scuse me while i bleach my head.

i am very sorry this took so long </3 i wrote this as a fic at first but i lost motivation so now it’s just in the form of brain rot :(

oh no :( poor reader with insecurities from your past relationships thinking every man out there is a liar, especially the two that gave their hearts to you :( running away from them is a smart move because we don’t trust men in this household!

but you forget how annoying they can be when it comes to getting what they want, and they want you (´▽｀) so don’t be surprised when you find yourself feeling scared out of your mind walking home alone and feeling like you’re being watched! or when you find certain luxury items randomly appearing in your room! or the slightest hint of their cologne when you wake up every morning! because you asked for this by running away 😵‍💫

this was supposed to be holiday for you — coming to penacony, but the headache and blurry room before you has you panicking! you best know that no one is coming to save you when you’re running through the reverie hotel like a lost bunny when you receive a letter saying they’ll have you tonight! and if you think you had any chance of escape, you’re so wrong 😖

oh, and don’t let them know that you’re afraid, it only spurs them on! hunting you down through the corridors of the hotel is so adrenaline inducing for them <3 running shouldn’t be so hard though, so why do you feel as if your legs are going to give out any second? oh right, the drink! they probably drugged it, seems like something they would do

an exasperated gasp leaves you when you finally let your body fall, eyes closing, preparing for impact. and the next thing you know you wake up, hands tied above you to the headboard, your body completely bare. you’d struggle with all your might, soft whines sounding at the back of your throat when you spot the two of them hiding in the shadows, staring down at you with those bright, lust-filled eyes

oh, you’re so dead

your body feels like it’s on fire, desperately needing release, needing someone to touch you, anyone. your voice betrays you as whimpers leave you when they stalk towards you, their burning gaze not helping with the burning sensation.

you really did think you could escape! so why’re you here, tied and unable to move? tears fall as you lock eyes with veritas ratio, your fight or flight kicking in when he reaches out to caress your cheek, wiping the tears away. laughter sounds from aventurine on the other side of the bed, you’re just so naive! all he wants to do is to love and break you until you’re a sobbing mess beneath him 😵‍💫 so don’t blame him when he kisses you, he just can’t help it anymore, not when you’re already shaking when all they did was drug your drink and reveal themselves to you after months of stalking :(

the aphrodisiac is making you incredibly sensitive to their touch, which is perfect for them because that would mean hearing your sweet cries of pleasure! you best prepare yourself though, because they’re not stopping until you’re about to pass out 🧎🏻‍♀️ they haven’t had you for months, nobody is going to stop them from worshipping you, not even yourself.

you’ll be so overstimulated by the end of the night that even just innocent touches can have you whining and trembling like a leaf (^^)

“you really think you can run from us?” — veritas ratio

“who you knew you were so filthy, hmm? you wanted us to hunt you down, didn’t you? dirty, dirty girl.” — veritas ratio

“missed you so much, pretty girl.” — aventurine

“stop? now why would we do that? you’re clearly enjoying this. look at you, making such a mess on my cock.” — aventurine

[saveyourblood]

Pretty Boy - Ch 2 (Evan Buckley x Reader) (Eventual Buddie x Reader)

Summary: You can feel Buck staring. When your eyes meet his, you realize he’s staring at your hand, which is still on Eddie’s knee. You slowly retreat, which makes Buck turn his attention to your face. You smile softly. He just looks out the window. The one where you’re an advanced paramedic, Buck and Eddie are firefighters, and you think you might be in love with both of them.

Ch 1

Chapter Summary: Buck faces a few challenges, and you're there for some of them.

A/N: This is such a niche story and I am desperate for validation, please tell me if you enjoyed reading! Word Count: 3.4k Warnings: descriptions of gun violence, mental health issues/suicide ideation (nothing overly graphic IMO)

Unlike some people who work in this building, you know how to take orders. So, instead of dragging your feet and prolonging the inevitable, you go to Bobby’s office the second you get back from the call. Hen tries to say something to you, but you’re so focused on having this conversation behind you that you ignore her. 

Despite the door being cracked open, you knock a few times. 

“Come in,”  Bobby says. 

You step in. He looks up. 

“Ah,” he remarks as if it’s a surprise to see you. “You can close the door behind you.” 

You close the door and lean against it. 

“Have a seat,” Bobby instructs as he files through some random papers. 

You let out a sigh. You were hoping to be in and out, but Bobby clearly has other ideas. Still, you do as you’re told. 

“I wanted to talk to you about what happened with Buck.”

As if you’d be in here for anything else. 

“Are you gonna write me up?” You ask instinctually. You’ve never been formally disciplined, so the question is gnawing at you. 

“Buck wants me to.”

You snort. “Buck wants a lot of things; most children do.”

“You’re a year younger than him,” Bobby points out. 

It’s true—Buck is 26, and you’re 25. But in this context especially, age is just a number. You’re a 25-year-old advanced practice paramedic with 3 years of experience who acts their age. Buck is a 26-year-old firefighter in his probationary period who acts like a frat boy.

“Are you going to write me up?” You repeat. 

Bobby gives you a look, then sighs with a crooked smile. “No. But if you do anything like that again, you’ll be hearing from me and Sergeant Grant.” 

“Fair enough,” you cede. 

There are a few silent beats in the conversation. This is why Bobby made you sit—he has more to say. 

“Why does he bother you so much?” Bobby asks.

“Literally everything I told him: he’s wreckless and he’s gonna get someone killed if he doesn’t change.” 

“So why not teach him to do better, to be better?”

“Trust me, Cap, I’ve tried,” you chuckle. “I mean, even earlier today, I taught him how to clear an obstruction in a neonatal airway. And honestly? For a few minutes, when he was running down the stairs with that baby in his arms, I thought, ‘Hey, maybe he isn’t so bad after all.’ And then he yells at Sergeant Grant, and he proves me wrong. Again.” 

“I’m talking to him and Sergeant Grant about how everything went down,” Bobby says. 

“I’m not telling you that to get him in trouble, I just…” You take a deep breath through your nose and let it out as a sigh. “It felt like no one was holding him accountable. And I’ve tried playing nice, and I’ve tried teaching him, and he still had the nerve to pretend that he can play god. And I just… lost it, and thought that maybe if I treat him like a man would, he would finally listen to me.”

Bobby nods, taking in everything you’ve said.  

“You think I don’t hold him accountable?” He eventually asks. 

You let out another sigh. “If Buck worked under any other LAFD Captain, they would have canned his ass about three months ago.”

“But is that the right thing to do?” Bobby counters. “This job is tough, and it isn’t something that can be taught overnight. Buck has potential—he could be an invaluable asset some day.”

“Is firing him the right call? Honestly, Bobby, I have no idea,” you admit. “But if people have to get hurt in order for Buck to be good at his job, then it isn’t worth the price.” 

Bobby ended up firing Buck a few days later. It wasn’t for what happened with Sergeant Grant; it was because, apparently, Bobby caught him having sex with some girl on a roof. He used one of the fire trucks to drive there. The moron didn’t realize they have GPS trackers. You got all of this information in a text from Hen. 

You turn the corner to the locker room, planning to put away your keys and wallet before starting your shift like you always do. You didn’t expect to see Buck sitting on the bench in front of the lockers. 

You plan on opening your locker, throwing your stuff in it, and leaving before Buck can say anything. The second you lift the lever, though, Buck turns his head towards you. 

He doesn’t say anything, and you definitely aren‘t going to break the silence. 

“So you heard, huh?” Buck says. 

You close your locker and spin the lock to scramble it. “Yeah, I did.” 

“Aren’t you going to say anything else?” 

“Tough break. Sorry, man,” you say with a shrug. You turn on your heel to leave.

“That’s it?” Buck says with a laugh. “A few days ago, you were slamming me against an ambulance, and now… nothing? Aren’t you supposed to say, ‘I told you so’?”

Buck doesn’t even work at the 118 anymore, and he still has a way of getting under your skin. You close your eyes, hoping you can gain some composure before you say anything.

“I’m sorry for pushing you; that was unprofessional,” you say and make your second attempt at leaving.

“But that’s all you're sorry for,” Buck says, rising to his feet. 

You turn around and eye him from head to toe. His chest isn’t puffed out in that hypermasculine way it normally is. Buck shifts his weight between feet, and when the pressure of your stare becomes too much, he breaks eye contact. 

“It’s like Sergeant Grant said: I didn’t say anything that wasn’t true,” you eventually reply.

“Then say it: you’re happy to see me go.”

Jesus Christ, he can be such a baby. 

“Okay, fine, you wanna go there?” you retort, taking a step forward. “You wanna know the worst thing about you, Buck?” 

He just looks at you. 

“You. You’re the worst thing about you. Because you could’ve been good. You’ve got decent skills, and you have heart, but you have no discipline. You can’t take orders, and you can’t look at a woman for more than thirty seconds without having sex with her. You’re a 16-year-old boy trapped in a 26-year-old man’s body, and ever since you started, you haven’t done anything to change it. You get in your own way and are too busy flirting or running your mouth to even realize it.”

You take another step towards him to ensure he hears what you’re about to say. “You could’ve been good. And I hope that shit haunts you. Because maybe, it’ll finally make you grow up.”

You start to make your exit again but linger in the doorway. You turn back around; there’s one more thing you want to say.

“I’m not happy to see you go, Evan. In fact, I was really hoping you would prove me wrong.”

And with that, you’re gone. 

You and Hen go out on a ��shortness of breath’ call that ends up being a STEMI — a heart attack. You get him to the nearest hospital in five minutes, and if they can get him to the cath lab, he has a really good shot at surviving it. The patient’s wife hugs both you and Hen, thanking the two of you for doing such a wonderful job. You savor the feeling; most calls don’t end this way. 

When you pull into the station, there’s an engine missing. At first, you think it’s no big deal: the boys are probably out on a fire call. Then you see Bobby standing where the engine’s supposed to be.

“What’s going on, Cap?” Hen asks as she closes the door to the rig. 

“There’s an engine missing.”

“Yeah, clearly,” you chuckle. 

“There were reports of a residential break-in on Lambert Street in Winnetka,” Bobby continues. 

“Damn,” Hen whistles. 

You both heard something about that over the scanner on your drive back to the station; there was a suspected hostage, a young girl. Last you heard, the subject was trying to flee by motorcycle. 

“All of the 118 firemen are accounted for,” Bobby concludes.

You and Hen share a look. Who has a track record of borrowing engines without permission?

The truck pulls up and slowly backs into the garage. You catch a glimpse of the driver in one of the rearview mirrors. 

“Pretty Boy,” you say simply. 

Buck steps out of the truck, still wearing the jeans and long-sleeved grey shirt you last saw him in. “I know what this looks like.”

“Looks like you took the engine out in your street clothes,” Bobby says as he approaches the younger man. 

“I didn't really have time to change,” Buck counters. He doesn’t say it in his normal cocky tone, though. Frankly, he looks nervous. 

“Athena Grant called me, wanted to tell me what an asset you are.” Bobby continues. “Told her she was half right.”

Buck frowns. “Are you giving me another chance?” 

“You’ve used all your chances; so have I,” Bobby says, “because somehow I have failed to communicate to you how lucky we are to do what we do.”

Bobby starts to walk away, but Buck isn’t letting him get away that easy. 

“You're wrong, Bobby. I absolutely do get what a privilege it is to serve here,” Buck says, “and you know what? You were right to fire me.”

That makes Bobby stop dead in his tracks.

“I was a punk,” Buck continues, “still am one. But I'm a punk who understands what he lost. Just… needed you to know that.”

“I hope you mean that. Now go get dressed.” 

Buck stands cluelessly for a second, then turns to you and Hen. “I think I’m not fired.” 

“Your shift’s not over yet,” Hen points out. 

You go to follow her, but Buck stops you by calling your name. 

“I just wanted to tell you, uh…” Buck says, wringing his hands together. “I’m gonna prove you wrong.”

Normally, words like that coming out of his mouth would set your skin on fire. Between the tone of his voice and the look in his eyes, though, something in your gut tells you to hear him out. 

“Yeah?” You ask simply, waiting for him to elaborate. 

“Some day, I’ll be good,” he says, “but until then, I’ll be better.”

Buck extends a hand for you to shake. It’s the most chivalrous thing you’ve seen him do since you met him. You look at his hand, then at his eyes. There isn’t a trace of humor in his gaze. You take his hand and shake it. 

“I look forward to seeing it.”

Your first call of the shift is to an amusement park where one of the rides malfunctioned. A rider was thrown from the ride as it was moving, and it sounds like he’ll be DOA. When the operator deployed the emergency breaks, though, it meant the rest of the train stopped at the top of a loop, which one rider is now dangling out of. 

Buck is the first to volunteer to climb the ladder and harness the passenger. You’re not surprised. He’s grown a lot in the last few weeks, but he still jumps at every exciting opportunity, no matter how dangerous it may be. Maybe that’s just how Buck is. 

“Hey, he’s asking about his friend,” Buck radios once he’s at the top. 

“Chimney, how’s the kid on the ground?” Bobby radios. 

You look up and shake your head. 

“We lost him,” Chim radios back. 

“All right, I don't need the people up there seeing that. So, do me a favor... He survived, right? Get him on a gurney. You know the drill,” Bobby instructs.

“Copy that,” Chim replies. 

Once you and Chimney get him on the gurney and out of everyone’s sight, you look up at Buck. 

“Come on,” Chimney mutters encouragingly. “Come on, Buck.” 

After a painfully long minute, you see the man’s grasp on the rollercoaster falter. Then, you watch him let go. You close your eyes before you see him hit the ground, but the sound will echo off of your eardrums for a while. 

You go the rest of the night without seeing Buck; you don’t share another call, and when you’re not out in the field, you’re asleep in the bunks. It’ll probably kill you in the long run, but these days, you learn to sleep whenever and wherever you can. 

When you wake up for morning report and breakfast, Buck is already sitting at the table. You wipe the sleep out of your eyes and get a cup of coffee before sitting across from him. 

Bobby was nice enough to make breakfast; he knows how hard these calls are. No matter how many you get, it’ll never get easier. 

Bobby sets a plate in front of Buck. 

“I’m not hungry,” he says almost instantaneously. 

“This is America, Buckaroo,” Chim replies as he sets some silverware on the table. “Eating has nothing to do with being hungry.

“Man, I was right there. You know, all he had to do was reach up and grab my hand,” Buck says instead.

“People do funny things at times like that,” you offer, sipping your drink. “ Sometimes they just freeze up.”

“I’ve never lost anyone before,” Buck says quietly. He looks up at you. “Does it get any easier?” 

Bobby answers for you. “No.” 

“Look, people die, and that’s part of the gig, right?” Chim says as he sits next to you. “See, your problem is, you're looking at every job like it's a long-term relationship. They're one-night stands, man. In that moment, they mean everything to you, but once the morning comes... it's on to the next one.”

“How silly of me to think you’d say something productive,” you roll your eyes.

Chim furrows his brows. “What?”

“You’re such a man,” you say to Chim, then turn to Buck. “Look, dude, we all go through it, and you just have to figure out a way to deal with it,.” You pause. “You know why we wear these uniforms?”

“Sex appeal?” Chim answers, which earns him a quick kick to the shin from you. 

“So people can easily identify us,” Buck responds. 

“That’s true, but… I don’t know, I like to think it’s because when we take it off, we can leave it all behind us. Right now, you’re firefighter Buckley, but when your shift is over, you’re Buck. It just… symbolizes letting go, I guess.”

“I see his face every time I close my eyes,” Buck says. “Does that happen to you?” 

“It’ll pass,” you promise. 

“And if it doesn’t?”

You stare at Buck for a moment. It’s hard to imagine that this is the same man who mouthed off to a police Sergeant mere weeks ago. 

“Then you talk someone,” you eventually say. “A friend, a therapist, a bartender… you find a way to let it out, and then you let it go.”

 

Once again, you don’t see Buck for hours. You heard on the scanner that the 118 responded to several rescue calls, none requiring an RA unit. You spent the rest of your shift bouncing from call to call and ER to ER, seeing everything from stab wounds to childbirth. It’s shifts like this that remind you why you do what you do. It’s chaotic, stressful, and bloody, but it is fun. After a certain point, you don’t even have to use your brain; the adrenaline in your veins kicks your brain into autopilot, and your pounding heart is just along for the ride. 

You step into the communal locker room, completely exhausted. You still have to change, and considering everything you’ve witnessed, you should probably shower too. Most of all, you want to go home and crawl into your bed. 

Buck is sitting on the bench in the locker room, similar to how he was a few weeks ago after he was ‘fired.’ Just like you, he’s still wearing his uniform. His head is bowed between his shoulders as his elbows rest on his knees. This time, his head doesn’t perk up when you open your locker. 

“I heard you used The Manuever today,” you spark the conversation. “Nice save.”

Buck finally looks up and then chuckles quietly. “Yeah, if only I could’ve done that a few days ago.” 

You take a seat next to him. “Still thinking about Devon, huh?” 

“I’m trying not to, I just…” Buck says, then cuts himself off as he shakes his head. 

“It’s easier said than done,” you conclude. 

“Yeah.” 

“Yeah,” you agree. 

Both of you sit in comfortable silence for a few moments. You open your mouth a few times only to close it. You don’t want to tell this story; you hate even thinking about it. But if you’re going to sit here and tell Buck that he has to let things go, you have to do the same. It’s only fair. 

“The first person I lost… her name was Katherine Vanec. She was 17 years old, wearing a University of Washington shirt, white shorts, and black Converse High Tops. We got a call from her mother, who was at work when she started getting strange texts from Katherine. It was supposed to be a welfare check, and when the cops got there, they found her locked in her bedroom. When fire and rescue broke down the door, she had a .22 caliber revolver pressed to her temple.”

“Jesus,” Buck mutters. 

“Katherine had a history of Borderline Personality Disorder and suicidal ideation. She figured out that her high school sweetheart had been cheating on her for almost a year. They made plans together, I guess — they were gonna go to the same school, find a place off-campus to live together. He pulled the rug right out from under her, and she couldn’t take it.”

“So what happened?”

You smile sadly. “By the time we arrived, a negotiator had been talking to her for almost ten minutes. They thought she was in a good spot that all she had to do was put the gun down, and we would swoop in and 5150 her.”

“Involuntary admission,” Buck says. 

“Yeah,” you confirm. “That didn’t happen. When the negotiator asked her to set the gun down, she lost it. She kept talking about how every time before, she chickened out, and she couldn’t let that happen again. She turned the gun on us.”

“Suicide by cop.”

You nod as a few tears well in your eyes. Even all these years later, that case haunts you. “Her finger wasn’t near the trigger; she didn’t want to hurt anyone. She just didn’t want to be alive anymore, and she couldn’t think of another way out. I can still hear the sound of the bullets tearing through her.” 

“Why are you telling me this?” Buck asks softly. 

You wipe at your eyes and clear your throat. “Let it out and let it go,” you answer, then nudge his shoulder with yours. “Your turn.” 

Buck smiles; the expression is bittersweet. “I keep replaying what happened. I can’t shake this feeling that there’s something else I could’ve done. Maybe I could have grabbed his arm, or maybe there’s something I could’ve said differently.”

“Or maybe, no matter what you did, it was always going to end that way,” you suggest quietly. “Maybe he felt the same way Katherine did—like he had no other way out. We can try to rescue people, but we can’t make them want to be alive. Some people just don’t want to be saved, Buck.” 

“That really sucks.”

You laugh. “Yeah, it does. I guess that’s why we have each other; it makes it suck a little less.” 

“‘Each other’ as in you and me?” Buck asks in a lighthearted tone. 

You roll your eyes, but secretly, you’re thankful for the change of pace. “‘Each other’ as in the 118, which technically includes you and me.” 

“Sounds like a copout.” 

You laugh and clap a hand on Buck’s shoulder before standing. “Have a good night, Buck.”

You make it to the doorway before he says your name. You look back at him. 

“Thank you,” he says softly. 

You bite your lip, but it isn’t enough to conceal your smile. “Anytime.” 

Ch 3

[dangermousie]

Now that I’ve checked out enough of all three newly-ish cdramas: Fangs of Fortune, Love Game in Eastern Fantasy and The Story of Pearl Girl, the results are kinda surprising.

I am, as you can tell, OBSESSED with Fangs. That is unexpected because while the trailer was gorgeous I couldn’t really figure out much that would make me obsessed from the summary and all the actors except TJR were either ones I am indifferent to or downright dislike normally. And now I love them all. I don’t know what’s the biggest surprise for me - Cheng Xiao, until now literally my least favorite actress from any country’s dramas, giving a good performance that makes me invested or HMH who I remember thinking of as so handsome but so bland but is now just utterly on fire and has entered Dylan in CLJ “you had THAT in you? How?” territory. And the story and the themes and the visuals! I haven’t seen a drama catering this hard to my personal narrative and character preferences since Novoland Eagle Flag.

Eastern Fantasy is even more of a surprise tbh. At least I was interested in peeking at Fangs for the visuals. I almost didn’t even check out Eastern Fantasy at all. I enjoyed the novel but that is never a guarantee of anything with adaptations (and it was never a major love of a book anyway), I like Esther a lot but not enough to watch stuff just for her. DYX is someone I have a soft spot for but not a single drama of his worked for me in years to the extent I kept joking he’s cursed. I hated all the trailers and posters - they looked kooky and not in a good way. Plus my track record of liking it when shows try to go for funny is abysmal and the whole thing seemed targeted to an audience that is so young they are still in middle school.

Only checked out because I had some time and omg it’s funny and clever and darling and the performances and characters and dynamics and the vibe are all on point (and so is potential for angst.) Soooooo good!

And now Pearl. It was by far my most anticipated of the three - trailer was cool, love the leads (and the fact that they reunited!) etc etc. But now? It’s a solid enough drama and enjoyable but it’s my least favorite of the three. A lot of it is genre viewer mismatch - I don’t really like “woman makes her name in trade with a side of hot scary man who eventually helps her” (see 2022 A Dream of Splendor - a well acted big hit that left me utterly cold.)

I just don’t care about the mechanics of trade or Horatio Alger stories even if Horatio in this case is a beautiful young woman. ZLS starts talking about cuts of profit for selling jewel waste products and my brain shuts down. It doesn’t help that while I find LYN character realistic for who he’s supposed to be, their dynamics so far do not make me ship them in the least and in fact I want her to lightly stab him (I genuinely don’t see how it will switch to her liking him.) It’s the same issue I had with Dream as well - just as here the chemistry was great but it was not a shippy dynamic that does it for me.

Oh well, that’s why it’s fun to watch new things, you never know…

[bucephaly]

Reconnecting Cherokee Masterpost

I’ve had a few Cherokee posts blow up on here and as a result I’ve gotten lots of ‘my grandma said she was cherokee’ ‘I’m supposed to have Cherokee roots I wish I knew anything about it’ ‘I was never taught anything about my Cherokee ancestry’ type sentiments in my activity. So! I wanna make a little masterpost with some resources on how to verify or disprove these types of family stories and how to get started for those interested in reconnecting!

A little about me and a disclaimer. I’ve not been reconnecting that long, about a year and a half, and before that I didn’t know I was Cherokee. I did not grow up Cherokee and I am white. What I’m going to be talking about is simply resources for genealogy, language, good places to connect online, etc. these are all things I’ve dealt with as I reconnect, but I am not any sort of authority on Cherokee issues or culture. The purpose of this post is to get people who know absolutely nothing about Cherokee identity and community started in learning more and seeing what needs to be done before reconnecting. And I acknowledge that the genealogical records and resources available for Freedmen descendants and Afro-indigenous people may not be as conclusive, and I simply urge Afro-indigenous people to do what research you can. I am also only Cherokee, I can’t speak for how any of this works for other tribes. Now, to get started

I’ll be talking about

Genealogy

Enrollment

Basic info about Reconnecting

and Language

Genealogy

Genealogy is the most important first step for anyone wanting to reconnect, or even just wanting to claim Cherokee ancestry at all. Unless you have done genealogy research that has shown ancestry connecting you to ancestors on the accepted Cherokee rolls or you are or have family who are citizens of one of the 3 federally recognized Cherokee tribes, please do not make claims of Cherokee identity or ancestry.

Fake ‘granny stories’ of Cherokee ancestry are very common, particularly in the South / Appalachia. These stories often go something like ‘my great-grandmother was fullblood Cherokee. She hid out from the soldiers rounding the Cherokee up for the Trail of Tears.’ There are many many variants, such as children being adopted by a white family, being traded away, or just otherwise being left behind or abandoned. I also frequently see ‘they escaped and hid in the mountains,’ ‘they pretended to be white / black,’ etc. Remember, the Trail of Tears happened in 1838, 185 years ago. My ggg grandfather was 2, so unless you are 60+ it would be unlikely that a great grandparent was alive during that period. This mythical great-grandmother is also occasionally an ‘Indian princess.’ There are many excuses for why ancestors might not show up on known Cherokee records, such as ‘the records were burned in a courthouse fire’ or ‘they were intentionally removed from the records,’ etc. Physical features are also claimed to prove stories, such as high cheekbones, dark hair, darker skin, etc. Old family photos showing grandparents with tan skin, etc, are also brought up pretty frequently. None of those prove anything, as many people of European or mixed ancestry can have these traits. Stories like this are also not exclusive to white families, they can definitely be present in Black families as well. These stories are most often entirely fabricated or resulting from a misunderstanding. It’s pretty common to have someone be familiar with the fake stories but convinced that their family story is the one exception and has to be real, which ends up being instantly caught as fake by anyone that knows the history, you’d be surprised haha. Here is a post I’ve made talking about fake stories in more depth.

DNA testing cannot prove descent from any specific Native tribe. An ‘indigenous American’ result on a DNA test does not prove native ancestry, as DNA tests are frequently wrong especially when it comes to ‘trace ancestry’. Nor does a DNA test showing 0 native DNA prove that one doesn’t have native ancestry. DNA tests are a novelty and irrelevant to native genealogy. The only time they are useful is in finding cousins through DNA matches, which can be especially useful for adoptees.

Now, getting into actual genealogy, the main process with Cherokee genealogy is fairly simple. I’m not going to go in depth on the process of genealogy in general, there are plenty of resources for that. Get what info you can from your family [names, birthdates, places people lived] of your recent ancestors, then find their census records [census records from 1950 and earlier are publicly available] or what records you can, and go back, finding their parents, etc. The goal is to get around to 1900. See where they were living at that point, as that will effect what rolls they might be on. There are three main Cherokee rolls that are looked at for determining ancestry [but there are other rolls as well]

The Dawes Rolls taken between 1898 - 1914 recorded the Cherokees living in the Western Cherokee Nation, Indian Territory before Oklahoma Statehood. This roll came with allotments, parcels of land given to the Cherokees. Cherokee Freedmen are also recorded on this roll, along with Intermarried and Adopted Whites. This is the roll that CNO and UKB uses for enrollment. Here is where it can be searched.

The Baker Rolls taken between 1924 - 1929 recorded the Cherokees living on the Qualla Boundary in western North Carolina. This is the roll that the EBCI uses for enrollment

The Guion Miller Roll taken between 1906 - 1911 recorded Cherokees living anywhere and was associated with a cash payout.

I can’t find free searchable databases of the Baker or Miller rolls, but you can find them on some ancestry sites like ancestry.com with a membership or free trial. Also, be aware that these rolls all have “Declined” sections of people who applied and were declined for having no proof of ancestry, mostly just applying to try to get money or land meant for Cherokees. This is especially true of the Miller roll, where 2/3rds of the applicants were declined.

If your ancestors aren’t on any of these rolls, can be found in US census records before 1900, or aren’t living in the Cherokee homelands in the early 1800s, they are almost surely not Cherokee. Also, be wary of results on ancestry sites that start cropping up in the 1700s where the only evidence is another person’s family trees. There are many people claiming descent from Dragging Canoe, Chief Moytoy, and others that put these things on their ancestry trees when none of these people have any descendants. And people will just make up entirely fictional people. Just be sure there are actual documents tying them to the Cherokee and to your ancestors [as people will make up fake children of real figures like Nancy Ward as well]

There is a fantastic resource for Cherokee genealogy in the Cherokee Research and Genealogy Facebook group. The researchers are experts on Cherokee genealogy and will run your lines for FREE and determine conclusively whether you have Cherokee ancestry or not. When they find someone with Cherokee ancestry, they will also find your ancestors’ enrollment applications, allotment locations, etc. they’re really fantastic and I highly recommend checking them out and saving yourself the trouble of doing the research yourself. Just read their rules thoroughly. Even if you did do some research, if you hit a wall or just want confirmation, check them out! Especially if you think you found legitimate ancestry, getting them to double check will remove any doubt.

Enrollment

There are three federally-recognized Cherokee tribes. Each has their own community, resources, and different requirements for enrollment. These are: the United Keetoowah Band [UKB] located in Tahlequah, OK, the Eastern Band of Cherokee Indians [EBCI] in Cherokee, North Carolina, and the Cherokee Nation of Oklahoma [CN or CNO] in Tahlequah, OK. Each of these have distinct histories. Cherokee Nation is the largest by far.

Be wary of fraudulent state-recognized Cherokee tribes. If a Cherokee tribe is not one of the three mentioned above, then it is not recognized by the others as legitimate. These state tribes often take resources that are supposed to be going to legitimate native communities [such as school funding], spread misinformation, etc. These communities often have obviously fake non-Cherokee traits such as ‘naming ceremonies’ and members with laughably stereotypical names like ‘spirit wolf’ and ‘white owl’ lol [also, this is specifically about state tribes claiming to be Cherokee, I can’t speak to the legitimacy of other groups.]

Two of the three Cherokee tribes have a blood quantum requirement. Blood quantum [BQ] is how much ‘native blood’ one has, depicted as a fraction. BQ is a very complex topic in native communities, which I won’t get into here. EBCI has a 1/16 BQ requirement, so to be a citizen you must has 1/16 Eastern Cherokee blood, as well as have an ancestor on the Baker Roll. UKB has a 1/4 BQ requirement, so citizens must have 1/4 Cherokee blood and an ancestor on the Dawes Rolls or the 1949 UKB roll. CNO has no BQ requirement, if an ancestor is listed as By Blood on the Cherokee Dawes Rolls, or listed as a Cherokee Freedman, then you are eligible for CNO citizenship.

Do not come into Cherokee spaces just asking what sort of benefits enrollment can get you. It’s pretty disrespectful and makes it seem like you only care about what you can take from us.

Reconnection

So you did your genealogy and found that you have documented Cherokee ancestry, what next? Reconnection is a long and difficult process and I’ve barely even started, but I’ll try to give what resources and info I can.

Who can reconnect? This can vary between people, but most often I see people [biased towards Cherokees who are active online] saying that anyone with legitimate documented Cherokee ancestry can reconnect. Some people prefer reconnectors are able to enroll in one of the 3 tribes, some prefer people have connected living family, it varies a lot. In my experience as someone who is white and not a citizen yet, if you are respectful and humble, people are pretty accepting. It’s also important to think about why you want to reconnect. You need to be prepared to give back to your people as much if not more than you get. That means learning the language, the history, learn about current issues, etc. Don’t go into it just wanting to be able to say you’re Cherokee as a fun fact or get some sort of monetary benefit. It’s also important to remember that you will get asked to prove yourself. Don’t be offended if you’re asked if you’re enrolled, who your family is, how you’re Cherokee, etc. This is part of our cultural protocols. Not only do we want to keep people with fake family stories from getting into our spaces, we also just like finding relatives! It’s also very important to remember your place as a reconnecting Cherokee. Don’t think having legitimate ancestry suddenly means you’re able to talk with authority on native issues or suddenly claim to be oppressed. If you’re white, don’t suddenly start claiming to be a POC or “white-passing,” you can be white and Cherokee. Cherokee is not a race.

Reconnecting is a difficult process, especially if you are far from any Cherokee communities. You cannot reconnect alone. You aren’t reconnecting to some distant past, or to stories in a book, you are reconnecting to a living community. This can be tough for people who are far from Oklahoma or North Carolina, and there are some things that are not really possible to learn except in person. But you can still learn, and there are some online spaces. I particularly find the ᎠᏂᏣᎳᎩ ᏍᎦᏚᎩ (Cherokee Community) Facebook Group valuable. It’s kinda small, but it’s one of the best ways to engage with Cherokee community online. Sorry if you’re a Facebook hater, Facebook is going to be your best bet for actually meeting people and engaging. The Cherokee Community group requires proof of ancestry before members can join. This usually just means sending your tribal ID or your thread in the Cherokee Research and Genealogy group to an admin and they’ll let you in.

Here are some good basic things to check out for reconnecting

OsiyoTV

Cherokee Nation YouTube

Museum of the Cherokee People YouTube

Cherokee Stories of the Turtle Island Liars Club by Chris B Teuton, Hastings Shade, Sequoyah Guess, Sammy Still, and Woody Hansen

Cherokee Earth Dwellers by Chris B Teuton and Hastings Shade

Mooney’s Myths of the Cherokee [note: this was written by a white man in 1910 after after spending some time with the Eastern Cherokee. The history is iffy, but the stories were recorded directly from Cherokee storytellers.]

Trail of Tears: The Rise and Fall of the Cherokee Nation by John Ehle

Do your own research, but be extremely wary of Anything posted publicly online. There is lots of misinformation about Cherokee culture. Personally, I mostly do my learning in the vetted Cherokee Facebook groups, in books written by actual citizens, and by talking with connected friends. Google is rarely your friend in this case.

Language

The language is the center of our culture, it is what makes us Cherokee. It is our duty as Cherokees and as reconnecting people to learn the language. I can’t stress enough how important it is. If you aren’t putting any effort to learn the language, it shows others that you aren’t committed and you will likely have trouble getting any help reconnecting from others, it just looks bad haha. Not saying you have to be fluent overnight, I’ve been reconnecting for a year and I still am very much a beginner, ‘it doesn’t matter how slow you go, as long as you don’t stop’ as CNO language teacher Ed Fields says. Luckily, there are plenty of resources for learning online!

It’s good to learn the syllabary or at least familiarize yourself with it early, as it’s a good introduction to the sounds present in the language. It’s an important part of our culture and the language too. There are also many learning resources that are only in syllabary, so you’re missing out on those if you don’t know it. Here are some good resources for learning:

Simply Cherokee Syllabary by Marc W Case [HIGHLY recommended. I got reasonably confident in syllabary in like a weekend thanks to this book. You can find fairly cheap ebooks versions. It has a story for each character that makes it so easy to remember and associate the characters with their sounds.]

Learn Cherokee Syllabary app [Apple] [Android]

Syllabary fonts and keyboard

There are lots of resources for learning the language. It’s really good to hear it as often as possible when learning vs just reading it, as I’ve messing up so much in my pronunciation from just reading it and now I’m having to break habits. You preferably want to hear first language speakers. There are two main dialects of Cherokee, usually roughly split between Eastern and Western. Dialects vary a lot within those communities as well. If you still have contact with any relatives that speak Cherokee, it’s always better to learn as much as you can from them.

Cherokee Nation language department [just explore this site, they have lots of resources!]

Cherokee Learner site [explore this site too, this is a great compilation of pretty much every Cherokee language resource, eastern and western]

Online Cherokee Class with first language speaker Ed Fields

RSU Cherokee Lessons [youtube]

Mango lessons

Other apps, including the Memrise course

Online Cherokee dictionary

That’s all I can think to say right now! I’ll probably add to this later as I learn more, find more resources, and get suggestions from others. But for now, good luck, ᏩᏙ, ᏙᏓᏓᎪᎲᎢ !

[unhingedangstaddict]

Currently working on my own fix-it fic but man this shit is harder than I thought it'd be- I keep crying and then getting distracted reading other fix-it fics. Thought I'd share this snippet to hopefully motivate myself to keep going???

Hen was starting to wonder if maybe Tommy was out for a run when she heard a faint ‘oh shit’ from inside the house. She banged on the door again. “Come on Kinard! I know you’re in there!” She called out. If Tommy’s neighbors thought she was crazy, oh well, too bad. Hen really didn’t care.

Finally the door was opened by Tommy. His hair was a mess- sticking up as though he’d been running his hands through it far too much-, he had deep dark bags under his eyes from lack of sleep, his eyes were puffy from crying, and frankly, he looked like shit. “What do you want, Hen?” Tommy rasped. Whether his voice was hoarse due to dehydration or yelling and/or crying was unclear.

“To talk about what happened last night.” Hen crossed her arms.

“You mean you’re here to yell at me for what I did?" Tommy guessed. He hadn't forgotten the thinly veiled shovel talk from Hen and Karen months back at the medal ceremony- he wasn't surprised Hen was here now. “Trust me I hate myself for it enough. There’s nothing you can say that I haven’t already thought about myself.”

“No. I’m here to try and understand what even happened. According to Eddie, Buck wasn’t making very much sense last night. Eddie would’ve come himself to check on you but he’s got Buck right now. Eddie’s worried about you and frankly, I am too.”

Tommy sighed deeply and stepped aside to let Hen into the house.

Soon they were sitting at Tommy’s kitchen table with mugs of coffee in hand.

“So are you gonna tell me what happened or are you just gonna keep having that staring contest with your coffee?” Hen questioned.

“He asked me to move in with him.” Tommy admitted quietly.

“Okay,” Hen said slowly, waiting for Tommy to explain further why he was upset by it. Beyond the obvious matter of Buck leasing his loft apartment and Tommy owning his house, Hen wasn’t sure what the issue was.

“For a split second, I thought about saying yes.” Tommy confessed. “Then I returned to reality and realized I had to end it.”

“But why?” Hen questioned.

“Even if it was only for a second, Hen, I was ready to, what? Sell my house and more than half my stuff to move in with him? I’m not even mad about that part- I’m upset with myself for considering it. I’ve been in Evan’s position before, first gay relationship, lovesick, you think it’s gonna last forever. And I’ve been the first for guys before too. Like I told Evan last night, I know how it ends. And I guess I’d rather break my own heart than wait around for Evan to do it.”

“If you’ve been so sure all this time that it could never work, why did it take until now for you to call things off?” Hen questioned.

“I think from the start I knew I was playing with fire. After the last guy I was a first for, I told myself I wasn’t going to do it anymore. Then I met Evan, and he was just so magnetic, I couldn’t stay away even if I wanted to. I couldn't say no to him. I think I always knew my heart would get broken, and I guess I was okay with that all this time, until last night when I realized I love him, and I knew I had to cut myself off before I reached a point of no return.” Tommy explained. “I mean, I’m a fucking a mess right now and I was the one who called it off. I don’t know if I would’ve been able to survive him ending it.”

“Did you really just figure out last night that you love him?” Hen asked.

“I guess I sorta loved him from the start but last night was different, Hen. I’m in love with him, like well and truly love him, in a way I’ve never felt before, about anyone.” Tears filled Tommy’s eyes. “And I’m just his first. And as badly as I want it, I know I don’t get to be his last.”

“What makes you so sure you can’t be his last?” Hen wondered.

“Because I’m not the forever guy." Tommy shrugged slightly as a tear finally escaped and slid down his cheek. "At best I’m the close-to-but-never-quite-enough guy."

[yiminsuu]

Please, Stay

Pairing: MK1 Syzoth/Reptile x F!Reader

Warnings: Sexual themes (+18), breeding, two cocks, angst and fluff, self-esteem issues, jealousy, friends to lovers, mentions of violence.

Author’s Note: Did I buy a ps5 just to play MK1? You bet. He needs all the loving in the galaxy and we'll give it to him no matter how much it costs! Please the way his family was taken from him was just so cruel, baby boy didn't deserve it...

Shattering noises reached my eardrums as I stepped into the kitchen of the academy, watching Syzoth sigh in desperation while his emerald eyes stared at the broken cup on the ground. I felt my heart breaking at his lost expression, yet I ceased all desire to touch him and walked away as silently as I could.

Since meeting Liu Kang and the others my seemingly normal life took a toll, transforming me into a 24/7 killing machine with 0 possibility of my enemies ever escaping Kombat. According to the Fire God, I always had this in my blood, now I just have to balance it… I just didn't expect that coming to a different realm and being incarcerated by a maddened sorcerer was the way to do so. That's where we met him, that's where we crossed eyes, that's where I fell enchanted by him.

Perhaps it was the anxiety of meeting someone new, or maybe I wanted to punch someone for the horrible things done to the people of Outworld, but there was no way of knowing I was attracted to what Baraka called a 'Zaterran', at least not at the time. Seeing Syzoth in his real form was surprising because I had never seen his kind, but the reptilian didn't know this, and in the beginning, I was sure he hated me to the core. He kept a certain distance from me unless I engaged against someone, he had my defense just like I had his, I didn't think much about it to be honest, I was sure he wanted to stay on the good side of the rest.

So when I spoke with Ashrah about our teammates in the gardens at tea time, she made it clear that she wanted me to talk more about Syzoth, indicating how protective he was over me when our battle against Quan Chi and Ermac took place, or when Li Mei chased after me when I made a mistake. I mean… I am practically a child compared to them, I found it normal that even Johnny would aid me at all times. I did notice their growing friendship as time passed, I was happy Syzoth could grieve his family in peace, and that he can have a joyful life from now on, yet after so much I don't think he's comfortable with me, don't think he'll ever be.

"Sometimes, people need to reflect on their past to come to peace with their mistakes."

"Thanks Ashrah, not undermining your achievements, but just because you did it doesn't mean others can do it as easily."

"Then why not come with me and Syzoth to Outworld? We will have a chance to speak our minds while we have dinner."

I declined, didn't feel like being the third wheel.

Realizing I was jealous was quite easy, but I swallowed it down, it's normal for me to get my hopes up to then be crushed mentally and emotionally. I was in silent rage, and I almost broke Raiden's skull in a friendly kombat so I decided to retreat to my accommodations with Liu Kang's permission who, weirdly, didn't stop smiling at me as I left. Following my encounter with Syzoth, I sprinted to my room and screamed into the pillow with genuine self-hatred for not asking if he was okay, and with regret in my mind, I drifted off to sleep.

Subsequently, waking up in the middle of the night to knocks on my door scared me, I thought there was some sort of emergency and I hurriedly opened the door to freeze immediately at the sight of the reptilian, he looked stunned at the speed in which I answered that he visibly gulped. "Syzoth, hey… I-Is something wrong?" Don't take me wrong, I did try to have conversations with him plenty of times, but he either avoided or ignored me, so I just gave up. "Do we have an emergency?"

I jumped in place when he changed into his reptile form, speechless at the action, we stared at each other in silence until his human form came back with a deep exhale. Even then, Syzoth refrained from saying a word for a good minute and turned to walk away before stopping and muttering something under his breath, cursing slightly. "Can I-- Can I come in…?" He questioned loud enough. With a furrowed eyebrow and with a growing heartbeat, I let him into my room and closed the door gently, once I glanced at Syzoth, his back was turned to my figure, and his head hanging low.

I cleared my throat, getting his attention, but he wouldn't budge from his position. "Did something happen? Is Johnny bothering you with the whole movie thing?" It's 3 a.m. but I'm sure Cage is still awake doing whatever an actor does in hopes his movie would be a success. "I can speak with him." I finished. Frowning at the lack of answer, I crossed my arms and my anger built up fast in my body. "Look, if you only woke me up to stand silent in the corner of my room you might as well leave, we'll speak in the--"

"Do you hate me?" I shut my mouth and widened my eyes at him.

Hate him? How could I? He's saved me more times than I could count. "Why… Why would--"

"I've seen how you watch me, how everyone watches me." There was so much sadness in his normally soft voice, his beautiful eyes staring into my own with every emotion he could find. "Do I look that monstrous, (Y/N)? Do I look so hideous you can barely withstand me to be in your company? You turn away every time I try to be with you in the same room, is it because of my true form…? Do I scare you? Or is this human skin just as mundane for you?" Syzoth transformed into his Zaterran form again. "Will I receive hate from you no matter what sort of shape I possess?"

Nothing came out of my lips, mostly because of the shock from his unexpected outburst, Syzoth looked away and took a few steps back from me, his whole demeanor changing into one of desolation. The room got darker when the moon hid behind clouds as if to make the reptilian a cruel favor. "Syzoth…" I called but got interrupted.

"Someone like you will never see me as an equal, and I should have known, but you… Looked so innocent in that cell that I couldn't resist securing you from harm. I beg of you, forgive me if I intimidated you as far as not accepting a dinner invitation, I want you to know you are the last person I ever want to hurt in any way. I'll stay away, just… Don't look at me with those eyes, the eyes of someone frightened, not you…"

Without thinking, I placed my hands on his reptile cheeks, his pupils dilating under my touch, he felt cold but I didn't let that bother me, there's nothing about him that could bother me. "I don't hate you, okay? And I'm not scared." I uttered to him, and in a flash, his human shape graced me, staring down at me with a glow in his eyes I'd never seen before. "But, you were--"

"Syzoth, you are the kindest soul I've met, you did everything you could to protect your family, you helped us defeat Shang Tsung and saved our lives countless times. Besides, I couldn't care less about your appearance, you are so handsome, soft-spoken, and courageous." I pursed my lips as I saw something shift in the way he looked at me, maybe I should've said something more worthy of being seen as his friend instead of stating the obvious, I have a crush-- No, I am full in love with him. I felt as if the world was torturing me all this time, and I failed to see I was the one torturing him with my avoidance of solving my own problems. "You mean it…? All of it?" Syzoth's hands rested on mine, his body slightly closer to touch mine.

"I do. I was surprised the first time I saw your true form, I'm not gonna lie, but I've grown accustomed to Outworld's unique beauty… What I did not like, on the other hand, was being called 'freakish'." I smiled brightly when he chuckled, the tension between us quickly evaporated, but I knew something changed. "I am sorry, you are anything but freakish." He paused, and my cheeks grew hotter as my hands were held by calloused ones. I gathered the little braveness I had and spoke. "I actually thought you hated me, you observed and followed after me everywhere, I was sure you wanted to kill me at some point."

"Oh, I didn't mean--" With the light of the moon, I saw his expression turn into a nervous one. "No! (Y/N), have you seen yourself in a mirror? You look so lovely, so breedable…"

Both of us stopped to process what the reptilian said.

Syzoth covered half of his face with his hood while I stood in place, screaming internally. "Fuck… I didn't want it to come out like that, I wanted to take you out first." I was thrilled at the thought of him having me how he desired, so I shut my mind from judgment and gulped down my anxiety, and kissed his cheek. He gazed at me with widened eyes, letting go of his hood and leaning closer to me, pecking my lips experimentally, so delicately as if I was going to break in his arms. I felt hot at the sensation of being wanted, and kind of ashamed for judging his relationship with Ashrah.

The Zaterran halted all movement to gaze at me. "I need your mind right here, baby. Please." I almost whined when he pulled me to him, kissing him as our clothing came off and sitting on his lap while he moved his head down towards my stomach and pressed open-mouthed kisses against my skin. "Your mouth feels good…" When I looked into his eyes, which were already staring back at me, I felt myself relax, his eyes were so soft and held so much love, that I felt like my heart was going to burst at the sight. Syzoth pressed his lips against my breast, squeezing the flesh of my thigh, enjoying how I shivered underneath his fingertips. I gasped when he bit my chest, breath hitching when he snapped away my underwear, inhaling my body as if it was the sweetest flower he found.

I kissed his forehead and embraced him by the neck, receiving a groan from him promptly. My breathing was turning heavy as his hands traveled from my thighs to my buttocks, pressing me against his clothed manhood. "W-Was that dinner supposed to be a setup?"

"Yeah… Truth be told, if you had gone I would have bent you over right then and there." Dammit Ashrah, you should've given me a hint. I shoved away the thought of her and planted a kiss on his neck, a breathless 'more' left his lips, sliding his remaining wear down and I gave out a wail when I felt two hard cocks on my behind. "Syzoth, you--"

"You don't have to take both, it's fine. I know this isn't something humans see every day…" He's going to be the dead of me, and the worst thing is, he knows about this by the expression he's wearing now. A soft mewl echoed in the room when one of his cocks brushed against my hole, he almost salivated at the sight of our bodies prepared to join together. "I promise I'll make you feel good, extremely good." Syzoth smirked as he laid on my bed, his thumb playing with my clit as his tip kept teasing my entrance, choked moans leaving my mouth and my fingers went to grab his short hair.

I let out a desperate whine when he suddenly entered me, my lips shaping an O as his finger abused my clit. "Syzoth…! F-Fuuck!" The sound of my wetness made me feel so self-conscious, but the way he looked so lost in pleasure excited me to no end. He retreated his finger when I arched my back, my walls clenching around his still-entering cock. "So warm… So perfect…" His piercing, green eyes kept eating at the scene, and his lips let out a sound of thrill for being able to be completely inside me, pushing my body against his as I shook above him, the moan that left me was unholy.

"Yes, yes, shit…" I heard him utter nonstop, his tail appearing to grasp around my thigh.

"Y-You’re stunning…" I told him, and the reptilian groaned deeply at my words, sitting once more and kissing me hungrily as he began moving. Syzoth bit my shoulder and spread my legs further apart so he could thrust deeper, he smiled weakly against my trembling skin, hugging me tightly as he felt his other cock rubbing against my asscheeks. I pushed his torso into mine, tears brimming in my eyes and both moaning between kisses. "Just like that, pretty… Take me all in…" I managed to nod, pulling Syzoth into another kiss as my legs wrapped around his torso. I was becoming desperate, the feeling of his cock stretching me out felt heavenly, I could feel every inch of him as he moved inside of me.

Syzoth grunted, tightening his hold on my body so it would become impossible for me to escape. "Fuck…!" He cursed loudly, forehead pressing against my neck. "(Y/N), please (Y/N)! Let me cum inside…!" His tip pressed against my cervix, and I attempted to shift my position a bit but his hold was unbreakable. He looked so needy with that fucked expression of his, so gorgeous with sweat running down his muscle, and purely swallowed by pleasure and pain alike. My forehead rested on his and he gasped, finally moving his hips faster, he was trying to reach the deepest depths of my being.

I could feel the love radiating off him in every action, the way he kissed me, how he embraced me, the affection in his eyes… I could feel it all, tears cascaded down my cheeks, kissing his lips. "Don't let go of me…" I whispered, holding onto him as my hips moved in sync with his. Syzoth whispered my name like a mantra, followed by many words of adoration amidst our lovemaking. "I will never let go."

[kedsandtubesocks]

12:07 am - Gojo Satoru

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☽ ⋆⁺₊⋆

Happy birthday to our Sagittarius boy, you are so deeply loved Gojo

tags: sweet fluff with a surprise ending - just like how the birthday boy would want it

wc: 1.6k

The weeks leading up to Gojo’s birthday have been a nightmare.

Whenever you casually tried asking your boyfriend what he wanted for a birthday present, his answer was always the same -

“You. You’re all I need.” And he said it with the same toothy genuine grin.

You still wanted to try and get him something though.

However… fate decided she instead wanted to fight you at every step.

The special outfit you ordered with the hope of it arriving in time for his birthday ended up back ordered and wouldn’t be shipped for another week. The cake shop you planned to grab his birthday cake from had an unexpected construction issue. The surprise trip you had been secretly trying so hard to plan grew harder and harder to figure out with Gojo’s constant meddling. Plus, with his hectic unpredictable schedule you wondered if a trip, surprise or not, was even possible.

Discouragement consumed you fast and the bitterness still lingered on your tongue. Even now, as you hung up streamers in your shared apartment, you wondered if this would even be enough. Were you even enough for a man who could have anything in this world?

Climbing down the small stepladder, you glance at the clock.

11:47

Just a few minutes short from the time actually turning into his birthday.

You’re at least thankful this week’s mission would keep him away until the morning. The extra time became a blessing and allowed you to decorate before he came home. You wanted to try and stay awake to greet him. But as more and more yawns over took you, you think maybe you might not be able to.

So you decided for the next best option. You already had most of the table set up for Gojo to see when he walked further into the apartment. Large balloons covered most of the table. Vibrant streamers hung from above. Your card for him sat waiting. And now you’d place out the final piece.

It wouldn’t be the cake you had hoped for, but the assortment of cupcakes you snagged from a bakery nearby were pretty adorable. You now move to set them out on the table.

The keys jingling however suddenly ring into the apartment.

No. He couldn’t be home now. Then the apartment door unlocking ignites panic. You rapidly place the cupcakes down on the table, and scurry to the door.

And there he is. The strongest sorcerer.

Satoru, even still in his work uniform, looks like a quiet dream in the soft light. Even as he unceremoniously drops his travel bag without a care. He shoves his blindfold up and those mythical cerulean eyes of his twinkle.

“Well now, what are you still doing up?” Gojo grins, his voice warm and curiously excited.

“What are you even doing here?! I thought you weren’t supposed to be back till this morning?!” You fire back.

“What? Can I not sneak back early for my birthday?” Satoru smirks while he walks towards you to already lean down to kiss you.

Then, he freezes. His eyes flicker to stare out behind you and you turn around. A balloon softly rolling out gives you away.

“Oh?” His damn amused voice twinkles brighter. “You having a party without me?”

“Yeah. I was waiting for my secret other boyfriend to come over until you showed up.” You playfully tell him.

“I just got home! Why do you wound me so?!” Gojo shrieks in horror. Quickly he draws you into his arms and holds you tight. You can’t help but burst into giggles as he playfully kisses every inch of your face.

You just accept your surprise is slightly ruined. However, in your boyfriend’s arms, defeat doesn’t feel so bad. Once he sets you back on the ground, Gojo follows right behind you giggling like a gleeful kid about to meet Santa.

“Alright,” you sigh. “I wanted to surprise you when you got home and-”

As you walk into the kitchen, instead of seeing the cupcakes on the table, they now sit on the chair and are flipped over in their container.

Your excitement deflates and a wave of sadness swallows you whole. In the frenzy of Gojo coming home, you must have not place the container fully on the table and they fell.

“Wow!” Satoru cries loud and excited. “You set up all of this?! Look at all the balloons?! And the streamers!”

You can’t even look at him, or even acknowledge him. Your focus is only on the ruined sweets you silently approach.

His voice vaguely behind you now sounds distant and concerned.

Tears begin clogging your throat and you furiously, angrily, blink them away. You shouldn’t be this upset. They’re just cupcakes. Gojo could buy a whole bakery if he wanted to. But maybe the exhaustion of the day catching up to you, or the frustration leading up to this, all of it has you crying.

Gojo cries out your name worried, panicked.

“Is this about the cupcakes?” He asks and his voice floats around you like a comforting balm.

“Because they’re not that messed up! Actually, they still look pretty intact if you ask me-”

“No.” You sigh through the hot tears. “It isn’t just about this.”

You explain everything. Before you can even get to how upset you were about the cupcakes falling, Satoru’s hands suddenly cradle your face. Swiftly he’s titling your head up and capturing your lips with his.

He kisses you fierce, dizzying, as if he’s trying to steal your breath away while also ground you completely to him.

“You damn adorable and gorgeous dummy.” Satoru whispers fiercely against your lips. “How many times did I tell you? You’re all I need.”

It gets harder fighting back the tears for another reason, one that’s sweeter than any confectionery.

You also realize you shouldn’t have doubted Satoru’s sugar skills because, like he prophesied, the cupcakes are actually pretty salvageable. And after pouting with the worst puppy dog eyes, Satoru manages to get you to at least split one of the cupcakes.

You glance at the clock.

It’s officially his birthday.

Your heart grows against its cage thinking of how grateful you feel getting to celebrate this incredible man. Even now as he tries to sneak another cupcake like you won’t see him.

Playfully you swipe your finger through the messy icing. You childishly place a dot of it on his cheek. Satoru’s sky blue eyes go wide a bit confused and stunned at the action while he turns to you.

“Happy Birthday Satoru.” You warmly tell him.

His handsome face melts, like he’s staring at the sun first breaking over the horizon and your heart trips over itself.

“You gonna lick this off me now?” He tilts his cheek and wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. You laugh, shaking your head.

Suddenly an entire messy half cupcake smashes into your face. It mainly catches the side of your lips and more of your cheek. But icing is all over you now.

“What was that for?!” You screech.

“You started it first! You know I had to finish it.” He grins triumphant and it makes you want to pummel him, birthday boy or not.

“I’ll clean you up if you want?” He purrs suggestively.

“No! And no more cupcakes for the rest of the night!” You swat at the container as you close it. Satoru effortlessly and swiftly however sweeps you in his embrace.

He also flattens his frosting covered cheek against yours and rubs them together making you shriek at his ridiculous actions.

“Aw! Come on baby! It’s my birthday! You can’t do this to me!” Gojo wails.

“I’m tempted to lock myself in the guest bedroom for the rest of the night now.” You snap back.

“Oh like that would stop me.” Gojo snorts almost insulated and you know it’s true.

While still in his arms, Satoru suddenly kisses your cheek with his lips pressing against the icing. The sensation is squishy, strange but makes your lips twitch giddy.

“You’re my extra sweet treat.” He whispers grinning.

“You’re ridiculous.” You scoff without any malice.

Gojo simply beams bigger as he dives in to kiss your cheek again. He even playfully bites at your skin causing you to let out surprise squeak.

Unfortunately, another surprise yawn also escapes you.

“Alright, let’s put this party on hold till later.” Gojo says.

The cupcakes are put away. He drags you into the bathroom to help clean up the icing properly. As the night begins to unwind, you glance over at your boyfriend.

He really does seem carved out of a dream, so handsome it’s unreal. Yet a bright color of frosting faintly lingers against his cheek. Of course he didn’t wipe it off fully. So wetting a small hand towel you lean up to clean the last bit of frosting painting his cheek.

Gojo’s eyes flicker to you and his gaze stays intently glued on you.

“Next year I'll just have us plan a trip for your birthday.” You sigh thinking of how a trip to the hot springs sounds so nice now.

“Next yeah, huh?” His voice is colored playful, a shade just below a tickle-me-pink color.

“Yes, next year.” You playfully elbow him. “Unless you already have plans without me?”

He snorts. “No…I want as many birthdays as I can get with you.”

His words cause your heart to sprout wings and flutter wildly in your chest.

“Even if I decide to stick around and let you annoy me forever?” You offer light, delicate, and cautious.

Satoru chuckles softly. “Funny enough, I’m kind of hoping for that.”

His words, so simple and soft, wrap around you. Suddenly his hand again cradles your face. His thumb strokes your cheek tender and delicate. Your eyes can’t help but look up to him. In the warm bathroom light Satoru’s sky eyes shimmer like the ocean at dawn, deeply reflective, yet so bright.

He says your name and it’s caressed with such tenderness you feel it sinking into your bones.

“I realize what I want for my birthday today.” Gojo mutters. His eyes flicker to your lips.

“Oh?” You wait for his answer to be something crude.

But it isn’t.

“Yeah…I wanna marry you.”

[xqueen-of-disasterx]

Mommy issues

Boss!Scarlett × Fem!reader

WARNINGS: Smut, Boss/Employee relationship, Pet Names, Top!Scarlett, Bottom!reader

SUMMARY: Your boss Scarlett has some special plans for the celebration of your promotion

!Disclaimer English is not my first language so please excuse any grammar or spelling errors. This story is completely fictional!

Word count: 1.1 k

Authors note: Thanks for 100 follows love ya all

Masterlist

I've now worked for the outset for about three months and somehow, I still couldn't believe that I was working with the Scarlett Johansson. In the beginnings I would even stutter whenever she talked to me, which was pretty embarrassing form me, however after some time working with the movie star got more and more normal.

She made it hard for me to not blush whenever she was in a room with me. Whenever would stand behind me I could feel her hands on me, on my waist, on my shoulders or on my lower back. Or how she would gaze at me during meetings, but she would look away whenever I meet her gaze. I never said anything, to be honest I liked it.

Maybe it was all my imagination or how my friends would call it Mommy issues. But something told me that it was more than that, God it was so much more.

On that morning I had received an Email from Scarlett personally, which at first wasn't anything out of the ordinary but this one was addressed to my name asking me for a personal meeting.

To be honest I thought I had fucked something up and was about to get fired in the worse place. That was why when I arrived at her Office, I was even more nervous than I normally am. I signed not knowing how to react now. I couldn't remember any cases where I messed up? My appointment with her was at the of the day and what can I say they were torturous.

My hands were shaking as I carefully nocked at Scarlett’s door I beyond nervous I waited shortly before stepping in my boss’s office. I took a deep breath mentally preparing myself for her harsh words or punishment. However, to my surprise she just smiled at me signalling me to sit down across from her which I did.

"So, Y/N, your work lately has been nothing but perfect" suddenly all my stress had been relieved it felt like burden falling off my chest. "Was thinking about giving you the promotion for head of marketing."

I was speechless and she saw that too "I know that you are only 24 but I think it would be a great opportunity for you. I want young people like who know what they are doing in social media. So, what do you say, Y/N “.

"I'm glad you offered me this opportunity and I will gladly take it" I smile at her, and her plump lips turn into a smile too. She reached her hand out over the desk as I took and shook it and could feel how my cheeks heat up at the minor skin contact.

She abruptly stood up from her office chair going to one of her cabinets. „I think we should celebrate your promotion. So, what do you want red or white wine?" She smiled at me I was a bit taken a back. Did she do this with every of her employees? Or was I special to her?

"I'll have to drive home. I can't drink" she just smirked at me while placing two wine glasses down "Oh sweat heart, I'll drive you home if you want to. So, which one are you taking" I signed I knew that there wouldn't be away out.

"I'll take the white" She nods before opening the bottle "I knew it, you seemed like more of the sweet type" I could feel my cheeks heat up even more. Scarlett bit her lips before taking a slip from her whine.

We talked and made jokes what seemed like hours until she started making me compliments again telling me I how I would be her good girl. She knew how to get me.

"Do I make you nervous" If possible, I blushed even more I try to hide it by drinking more of the sweet alcohol "Come here sweetheart" the actress signalled me to come closer.

As I stood in front of her, but the older woman still wasn't satisfied. She put her glass down petting her lap. "Come on bunny don't be all shy now “.

I couldn't believe it I was sitting on the lap of my boss, and I was liking it. She grabbed on to my hips licking her lips "I know about your little crush on me. I can look through you like a window" Was it really that obvious? I tried to look away from her, but she grabbed my chin, pressing her lips onto mine.

I didn't pull away, no I whimpered into her lips as she broke away. I was breathing hard before diving into her again. I try to take control of the situation, but Scarlett wouldn't let me our tongues fighting for dominance.

In the end she won shoving her tongue down my throat, kneeling the flesh of my ass as I moaned out loud. "Fuck" I whimpered out feeling Scarlett’s lips on my neck, sucking, and nibbling on it.

Scarlett bit my neck making my hips buckle, she groaned on my neck before slamming me into her desk. I groaned at the harsh contact. "Do I have your consent bunny?" She asked me while unbuttoning my blouse "Yes" I cried out at the feeling of her kissing my skin again.

She finished pulling of my clothes before settling between my legs pushing them over her shoulder. She kittens licked my folds neglecting my clit. I let out increased moans making Scarlett groan too."Please Scarlett... no more... teasing" She smirked at me lashing onto my clit sucking it. I rolled my hips, but the actress held me down insisting two fingers into me. "Fuck you're so tight “.

She kept pumping her fingers curling them perfectly against my g spot. "Scarlett fuck I'm close" She smiled at me "Come for me bunny" She moved up my body holding me close as she fucked me through my high. Kissing me as I slowly came down from my high.

"That was amazing" I said as our lips parted "I liked it too" Scarlett kissed my cheek. I pulled my clothes on again. I didn't know what just happened also I didn't know what to do now.

As I tried to leave Scarlett stopped me "Where are you going?" "I'll have to catch subway you know. I don't really want to drive anymore “. She looked at me confused "No, no, I'm driving you I only had a glass of wine besides I feel pretty sober now “. That was the beginning of our live together and now I couldn't imagine on without her.

:)

[imaginedanvrs]

encrypted relations

part 5 l masterlist

summary: yelena belova x reader. when natasha takes you under her wing, she becomes like family, and the last thing you want is to lose that. but when you meet her younger sister who you know is off limits, you have to decide between what you really want and hope for minimal damage

word count: 4.2k

warnings: strap on sex (r receiving), public sex

“Can I try your widow bites?” You asked, squinting a little to line your aim up with the empty can placed a few metres away from you. 

  “Absolutely not,” Yelena answered at once from behind you where she leant against a tree stump. She had brought you out to a forest for your latest target practice and had done so under false pretences, as you pointed out to her numerous times. The blonde had invited you to come explore the less charted area of the city outskirts and you had agreed thinking that you were getting a chance to do something with the blonde that you could actually keep up with. Instead she had eventually pulled out her handgun from god knows where, talking about your next lesson.

  “You didn’t even consider it,” you stated. You pulled the trigger and embedded the bullet in a tree close by. 

  “No, I didn’t,” Yelena admitted. You shot her a scowl and lined up the gun again. “Up a little.”

  “How can you tell from over there?” 

  “I am talented in this,” she pointed out. There was no denying that. You fired again and, to no one’s surprise, missed.

  “Why do you not want my sister to know we had sex?” The question came out of nowhere but you knew it would come up eventually. You lowered the gun and faced the blonde who appeared interested above all else.

   “She’s very protective of you, you know?”

  “She’s protective of you too,” Yelena countered. 

  “I’m not her little sister.” 

  “And I am not little.” You handed the gun back to the Russian.  

  “You know, I wanted to meet you for a long time.” If Yelena didn’t like that you changed the subject, she didn’t show it. Her interest remained the same. “It was worth the wait,” you said. To that, she smiled and you couldn’t help but do the same. “So I don’t want to mess it up yet,” you summarised.

  “Why would you?” You weren’t sure how to answer that. You weren’t sure how to explain that aside from not wanting to upset Natasha, you had an abundance of anxieties regarding anything romantic following your experience with Rae. Not to mention that you knew Yelena had a fair amount of issues of her own and you weren’t so sure that they were compatible with your own. 

  Fortunately, you didn’t have to unpack all of that with the blonde yet, because yours and Yelena’s phones chimed at once, interrupting your train of thought. 

  Nat: im leaving for a mission tomorrow. Lets get dinner with Yelena You glanced up at the blonde who was already looking at you somewhat hopefully. 

  “I could eat,” you shrugged. 

  “We have a couple hours to kill,” Yelena said as you typed back a response to the redhead. When you glanced at the blonde, you found a look you were growing very familiar with. 

  “You want to fuck in the forest?” You questioned. Yelena was already strolling towards you leisurely. “Anyone could walk by.”

  “We’re way off the trail,” Yelena pointed out. You found it hard to object when her tumb was stroking the area right next to your lip. “I want you,” she said, pushing you gently into the tree behind you and getting close enough for you to feel a familiar bulge between her legs. 

  “You’re packing right now?” You exclaimed, Yelena grinned in response as she peppered kisses down your neck. 

  “You want to find out?” She asked, guiding your hands to undo her zip. You fumbled around with it without much hesitation, pulling the toy from its restraints for Yelena to spit on as you made quick work of your own barrier. 

  Yelena wasted no time in pushing inside you, lifting you up to settle around her waist so that she could fuck you the way she wanted.  “Fuck, you always take me so well, detka,” the Russian husked sounding unfairly attractive when her accent came out thicker. “Such a good girl,” she emphasised with a particularly harsh thrust. You wrapped your legs around her waist to help the blonde drive herself deeper, hitting that spongy spot inside of you that she always found without fault. 

   “Feels so good,” you moaned against your neck. You held her there as you gradually climbed your way to your peak, having been worked up just at the thought that Yelena had planned this.

  You were falling over the edge with a cry of the blonde’s name, holding her close as she moved her hips in time with your own to help you through your high and stop you plummeting too fast towards the ground. “You always look so good like this,” Yelena muttered as she gazed down at you. You gave her a slightly dazed smile and pressed her forehead against your own with a hum. 

*

  “She is a very bad shot,” Yelena stated to Natasha as you flicked a pea at her from your bowl. 

  “In my defence, I told you so,” you said with a glare that Yelena was entirely unfazed by. “Nat, can I use your widow bites?” The Russian next to you scoffed. 

  “I wouldn’t even hand them to you in an emergency at the risk of you hitting me on the other side of the room.”

  “Ha!”

  “I hate you both,” you grumbled. 

  “We’ll see how long that lasts,” Yelena muttered. You shot her a warning look, knowing how good Nat was at picking up on small signals like that. 

  “So where are you going tomorrow?” You didn’t look in the redhead’s direction as you spoke, not wanting to meet the watchful eyes you were sure you would face. 

  “England,” Nat said after a beat. 

  “Oh, make sure you go to Nandos while you’re there,” you suggested. 

  “Don’t we have that here?”

  “It’s not the same,” you said solemnly. 

  “I’ll give it a drive by,” Nat said with a trace of a smile in her voice. You risked a glance to confirm. 

  “And Buckingham Palace,” Yelena added with her best British accent.

  “Overrated,” you and Nat said at once. You grinned at the redhead, feeling your anxieties slip away. 

  “But when I get back I told the others I want to put aside some time to help with the widows here,” Natasha said. “Although it has been three months, do you think there's that many more here?”

  “It’s hard to say, we’re still working through the files but most of them now are about past operations,” Yelena explained. 

  “Melina thinks we might be coming up to a dead end though,” you admitted, knowing Yelena didn’t want to. You weren’t sure what she was planning on doing if you got to the end of those files and really did have nothing else to go on. Would she move on to somewhere else? 

  “Then what?” Natasha asked. The question hung in the air as a sudden tension filled the space. You didn’t look at either of the Russians, afraid that either of them might pick up on your disappointment. You couldn’t be selfish. Yelena had a job to do and it was far more important than her sticking around so that you two could sneak off together. Yet another reason why you couldn’t let yourself become too emotionally entangled with Yelena. 

  “I don’t know,” Yelena eventually answered when you could feel her heavy gaze on you. “Excuse me,” she said, getting up from the table. Natasha watched her go as you pushed your finished plate forwards. 

  “You guys seem closer than I expected,” Nat assessed and you tried your hardest to underplay your alarm. 

  “I mean it’s been three months,” you shrugged. “She’s close with Kate too,” you added. Nat hummed. 

  “Is she seeing anyone?” You knew that actively avoiding eye contact with the redhead wasn’t the best play here, so you turned in the booth slightly to face her. 

  “I don’t think so.” You weren’t entirely sure you were actually lying. Were you and Yelena seeing each other? You had no idea what you’d call it but you certainly weren’t about to say to her ‘well we have sex sometimes’. Natasha hummed. “Do you think she’d tell you if she was?” It was only then that you realised the redhead wasn’t interrogating you, she was just an interested older sister. And you were a paranoid bad friend. 

  “I do,” you said honestly. 

  “Good, I’m glad to know someone has her back when I’m not around,” Natasha said so sincerely that you felt a wave of guilt crash into your ribs. You could only bring yourself to nod. 

  “I will stay in New York until I find new leads,” Yelena declared as she sat down. 

  “Okay, great,” Nat agreed, not knowing where the sudden assertiveness over her decision came from but certainly not about to question it. You wouldn’t either. You were just happy that she wanted to stay. 

  The rest of the evening went by too fast, even with Yelena insisting on you all ordering double deserts. The widows shared stories that you listened to intently, you all took turns making fun of each other and laughed enough that the time went by quicker than you had anticipated and it soon got to the time that Natasha had to leave to prepare for her mission the following day. 

  Natasha offered you a lift but the younger widow insisted on taking you, saying something about your apartment being on her way. You weren’t entirely confident that Nat bought that, but it was what you went along with anyway. 

  “You can come inside but thanks to that double pudding I think I’m going to collapse in a sugar induced coma the moment we get to the bedroom,” you told the blonde. 

  “That’s okay, can I still spend the night?” Her question surprised you but you agreed without issue. Ever since the first time you and Yelena hooked up, every time she stepped foot in your apartment you would end up having sex at some point, even if you had the intention of focusing on other tasks, so you were expecting the blonde to try and sweet talk her way into your pants at some point or another, but it seemed she really did just want to sleep with you because just ten minutes later she was curled up against your side. 

  You had been stroking her hair as she dozed off to sleep, an action you knew she cherished, and continued to do so for a while longer until you felt yourself get carried under the same wave of exhaustion. You held Yelena even as you slept, comforted by the way her body seemed to melt into your own. 

  Waking up to the sound of distressed whimpers, you looked down at the blonde and noticed a slight layer of sweat across her forehead in the moonlight. She was having a nightmare, you recognised immediately, one that was getting progressively more intense with every passing moment as her chest heaved. 

  “Lena?” You said as you placed a tender hand to her cheek. Her eyes shot open as she grabbed your wrist with an iron grip you didn’t dare flinch at. Instead, you looked her in the eyes as you assured her that everything was okay, that she was safe and that she was there with you. “I’ve got you,” you promised once she buried herself into your chest. You wrapped your arms around her as you felt your shirt grow damp. 

  “It’s alright,” you assured and Yelena bathed in the confidence in your tone as you spoke. 

  “Just talk to me,” you just about heard her murmur into your chest. 

  “I have the day off tomorrow, if you wanna do anything,” you muttered into the dark. You felt Yelena nod. “There’s a hiking trail I usually go to in the summer that I think you might like. There’s some great views and there’s never been many people there when I’ve gone.” You felt her nod again. “Maybe we could bring some food, kind of…make a day of it, you know?” You had already planned to ask Yelena to join you on that hike, so you already had everything in mind.

  “I’d like that,” she told you. 

  “Can Marty come?” You felt her chuckle softly that time. 

  “I guess,” she drawed out. You smiled at her insistence to be witty even when upset. 

  “Are you okay now?” You asked after a moment passed and the blonde’s breathing had steadied. 

  “Yeah,” she said as you stroked her back. “Just a nightmare,” she assured herself. 

  “Yeah,” you repeated, not wanting to push the blonde into telling you what she dreamt of. You knew she had plenty of nightmare material in her lifetime. 

  “Did Nat ever tell you about Dreykov’s mind control?” Yelena asked with a timid edge.

  “She did,” you admitted. You felt Yelena swallow.

  “I dream about the times I was under it a lot,” she told you. “Sometimes I worry that I still might be. I know it’s impossible but it’s just a thought I can’t shake.” You nodded as she spoke, thinking the fear was an entirely valid one you couldn’t imagine ever having to worry about. 

  “I don’t want to ever hurt you,” she whispered. 

  “You never could,” you said without hesitation. Yelena exhaled shakily, as though she had been holding her breath waiting for those words. A silence settled over the room as you held the blonde, both considering what the other had said.

“I don’t usually sleep much.” Yelena admitted. “That’s kind of why but…I sleep when I’m with you,” she said. You hoped she couldn’t feel your heart speed up marginally at her words. It meant a lot to know you could offer Yelena that refuge from her own head, even if a curveball had gotten past you that night.

  “You can stay here as often as you want,” you said. “I’d give you a key but” Yelena chuckled.

  “I don’t need it,” she stated. 

  “Yeah yeah,” you half grumbled. 

  “Thank you, detka,” the Russian said after a comfortable silence settled over the room. 

  “Anytime, Lena.”

~

A sharp stinging vibrating from the side of your neck up to the top of your head was the first thing to greet you when you woke up. You placed your hand to the area tentatively and didn’t feel any clear wound there. “For a second?” You questioned, as you remembered Natasha being in your apartment. 

  You glanced around at the box room you were in, taking in pretty much everything you expected to find when you woke up. It was a standard interrogation room. An obnoxiously big two way mirror for everyone in the department to come and peer through, grey walls, a single metal door, a few uncomfortable chairs, a small table. The only thing missing was handcuffs. Even though Natasha had told you she wasn’t going to use them, you still believed you would be in them when you woke up. Perhaps they had realised that you really weren’t a threat and that you wouldn’t even make it past the locked door, that was even assuming you wanted to leave. You wouldn’t. Backing out wasn’t an option when you knew how pissing Rae was going to be when she noticed you were gone. 

  You pulled at your jumper sleeves and noticed that your coat was hanging over the back of your chair. You had wrongly assumed they would have taken it. You felt around in the pockets, noting that your lighter wasn’t in there. So you didn’t hold all of their confidence. 

  Just as you took your hands out of your pockets, the door opened and a suited man walked through. He was examining the contents of the tablet in his hands as he sat down and didn’t look up at you as he spoke. “Miss l/n,” he began, putting the tablet down. Your passport photo was on it along with a lot of text you couldn’t read. “Am I right in assuming you know why you’re here?” He asked, folding his fingers together and placing them on the table as he stared at you. 

  “You found traces of me accessing confidential information,” you stated with no intention of lying to the agent. 

  “Correct, do you know what that information was about?” You shifted in your seat, avoiding his gaze. 

  “Not really, I opened the video for a second but then I closed it,” you recalled. “Is that kid okay?” You asked because you had to. You had passed that video on to Rae and had no idea what had been done with it since. 

  “Why did you access that video?” You looked up at the man and knew he wouldn’t answer your question. In all fairness, you had no right to know. 

  “Someone asked for it.” 

  “Who?”

  “I can’t say.” The agent narrowed his eyes at you. 

  “If someone holds that information then it’s critical we know who,” he explained. You sighed as you leant back in your chair, suddenly feeling the urgency for fresh air. “Miss l/n,” he pushed impatiently. 

  “I can tell you everything I’ve accessed. I can tell you when and how but I can’t tell you who I gave it to.” You were well aware of the fact that you owed Rae nothing and that protecting her would do no good, but you just couldn’t bring yourself to say her name because no one could be sure of what it meant for her. If she was lucky, S.H.I.E.L.D would bring her in for questioning and lock her away for no doubt as long as yourself. If she wasn’t, word could get back around to whoever was at the top of what she was a part of and you knew that they weren’t the kind of people who tolerated loose ends. You were one of the ones that identified them. 

  “If it’s not current then-”

  “Dmitriev was the first one, a couple months ago almost.” The agent stared at you for a long moment. He recognised that name, that much was clear. Had he known him?

  “Excuse me, Miss l/n,” he said politely as he stood up from the table and walked out of the room. You watched him go, unsure of what his sudden change in demeanour meant. 

  You sat in the interrogation room alone for a while after the agent left. You had no watch or clock to know how much time had really passed, but it was long enough for you to go through the numerous possibilities of what the agents could be doing, firstly assuming they had all your electronic devices in hopes of uncovering as much as they could from them. They wouldn't get anything. There was nothing of interest on your phone and your computer had so many firewalls, encryptions and general locks that you knew they wouldn't be able to access, because if they did they would use the techniques themselves. 

  You were willing to tell them all about the things you had found in the months prior, but you weren't about to unlock your computer for them. 

  The door opened again and you expected to be met with the same agent as before. “Hi again,” you greeted the Russian as she strolled into the room. 

  “Can I get you a drink?” She asked with a small smirk as she stood next to the chair. You smiled at her and shook your head. “So Dmitriev, huh?” Natasha started. 

  “The one in the safe house,” you nodded. 

  “I thought you didn’t read the reports,” the Russian stated, hoping to catch you out.

  “Well that was the first one so naturally I was-”

  “Curious.” You shrugged. 

  “Tell me who was next.” You did. You gave Natasha the complete list of everything you had searched for, remembering it all clearly because you spent hours thinking about each one after they occurred. The Russian didn’t question your memory. You told her about each search and about the signal blocking and virus. You told her about everything Rae had told you to do, never once mentioning her name. 

  “You know, once we start investigating this we’ll be able to figure out who was asking for it,” Natasha stated. You didn’t believe that.

  “Maybe,” you said. The spy knew you didn’t buy it. 

  “If you give me a name now it could bring your jail time down.” That you knew to be true, but that didn’t mean it was worth it. You didn’t respond to that though Natasha could see that it didn’t make a difference. “Why are you protecting them? They’re not going to do you any favours.” The redhead examined you carefully. 

  “I’ve told you everything I can, I’m ready to go now,” you announced without looking at Natasha. She watched you for a moment longer before moving her chair out to stand up and walked slowly towards the door, pausing before she opened it. 

  “That trace you left, the one that made us find you, that was deliberate, right?” You didn’t say anything, but the smile that flashed across the corner of your lips was all the answer Natasha needed. “You’re good, maybe if we had someone like you here we wouldn’t have these problems.” It was only once Nataha said it out loud that she realised how much sense it made. She glanced back at you once more before leaving, making her way directly to the top floor.

  “You should hire her - l/n,” Natasha said as she marched into Fury’s office. He looked up at her with a concentrated frown.

  “The hacker?” He asked as he leant against his desk.

  “Clearly our security needs improving and if she can see all its flaws then maybe we should ask her to fix them,” Natasha explained as though it was obvious. Yes, she knew that it wasn’t a decision to be made lightly, but that didn’t change the fact that it made a lot of sense. 

  “And give her full range to look at more confidential files?” Fury was right, it could be a smart move or a catastrophic one and ever the pessimist, he went for the latter. 

  “She wasn’t doing that for herself, though.”

  “What if she was? What if she’s lying so that this could happen?” It was a valid point, just not one that Natasha could see when she talked to you. 

  “She’s not lying, Fury,” the redhead insisted. The chances of you lying without the spy picking up on it were a thousand to nothing.

  “You can’t know for sure,” he countered. 

  “Neither could you,” Natasha was quick to point out. Fury regarded that for a moment as he sighed. He had made a lot more enemies since he had taken the young assassin in, as had she. 

  “If she gives us a name, she gets a job, but she’ll be your responsibility, Romanoff.” 

  “Understood, sir,” Natasha nodded. Fury watched her leave, given some hope by the spy’s confidence in you but remaining cautious overall. 

  Natasha wasted no time in returning to the interrogation room where you were still sitting patiently. You didn’t seem surprised when she walked through the doorway that time, nor that she was back so soon. 

  “We haven’t been able to access anything on your computer yet but we’ve found some things on your phone I thought we could talk about.” You stared back at Natasha blankly. There was nothing incriminating on your phone. “Why are you still living with your ex?” 

  “What?” You frowned at the Russian, not understanding what she was getting at.

  “Your flatmate. I saw from old photos and texts that you guys used to date,” Natasha explained simply, staring back at you. You couldn’t tell if the question was genuine or if she was just trying to get a rise out of you. 

  “We still do?” You answered though even you could hear it sounded more like a question. “What’s that got to do with anything anyway?” 

  “Did she know about your technical skills?” You didn’t answer, trying to think of the right thing to say. That was all Natasha needed. “Did she ask you for those files?” Natasha pushed. 

  “No,” you were quick to answer. Too quick. 

  “Really? Because we did a little background check on her and it doesn’t look great within the context.” It occurred to you right away that Natasha was bluffing but you had no way of knowing for sure. You didn’t even know if Rae had a criminal record, she had never mentioned it and you had never thought to ask. Similarly, you knew that she was involved in some dodgy stuff with questionable people and maybe it was naive to think that there was no trace of that.   “I think she did ask for those files and you gave them because you’re a nice girlfriend. But maybe she’s not so nice and I think that you know that and that’s why you left that trace.” When you didn’t respond, Natasha leant forwards to that it was harder to ignore her. “I think you’re trying to make up for it and I can assure you the best way to do that is to help us. You can do that if you just say her name.” She was right. You knew she was. It was a hard truth that you just had to swallow even if it would hurt. You took a shaky breath, and uttered her name.

[shadamypositivity]

ok for whoever is interested i just had a wild run in my shadamy sims lore, please advise that i utilize wickedwhims but i'm not going into explicit details necessarily but just wanted to give that disclaimer

so i moved shadow amy and sonic into the same house bc they my favies but also wanted to see what would happen if they were all strangers under the same house. as expected, sonic was obsessed with the pool bc he's athletic, and shadow was chillin bc i forgot to give him a crystal table so he didnt have anything to do lol, and then i mainly played amy bc i like cooking and playing dress up with her. 

i was happy to know that shadow immediately wanted to befriend amy, she was most of his aspirations lol, and sonic was joining clubs and was a pro athlete, but i was still going to play the long slow burn with shadamy.

shadamy had different plans and as soon as they reached good friends, amy was like meet me in the bedroom and I sighed and said well who am i to deny fate, so they had sex.

amy immediately gets pregnant, to my surprise, and i debated whether or not to abort it bc this was moving a little fast for me, i didnt even get to do a date with them, but then i was like well it was leading to this anyway so sure, why not, i love moontoonsey's shadamy fankid so i can finally make her in the sims if i do this so lets go. 

amy is pregnant and tells shadow who is super happy and im emo bc thats so cute stop; she didnt tell sonic yet bc i was like, they would be kind of a lowkey relationship right so i'll do it later-- so christmas comes, i do the whole shebang bc i know amy loves parties and traditions and i try to meet all the criteria, and santa claus has just walked in when !!! amy gets a moodlet thaat says she's cramping and that something is wrong, she has to go to the hospital --

she has a miscarriage which has never in the history of my sims has happened, even for my party girl character i made where i was doing everything under the sun to get her to have miscarriages bc i couldnt afford her abortion rates T T, and the whole damn house sad, shadamy sad, sonic who didnt even know about the baby is sad, SANTA is sad!!!!! i was so upset bc like what?? i even go into amy's mods to make sure she's hyperfertile, and that her pregnancy chances are high.

needless to say i spent the last week trying for another baby bc now this is personal lol shadow has been crying in the bed everyday, i have to fix this! amy never gets pregnant again, has like 2 periods, but i constantly check her fertility tests and its always 0???? like hello?????? what is going on. 

i get on last night after an emotional weekend lol and decide i am playing God, Amy will have a baby today lol i need this. so i try to adjust her mod settings again and then just cheat into a pregnancy bc whatever atp. i move sonic out to live with rouge and knuckles in the city bc i love his homeless mooching ass, and fix up the room bc what could go wrong. 

i put amy to bed, i put shadow to bed when suddenly shadow's task list blows up and im like wtf is there a fire or something - NO ITS ANOTHER MISCARRIAGE ?!?!?!?!?!?!??!

i pressed pause and messaged my bestie bc WHATTTT is going on  lol and she replies back 'WAIT STAY PAUSED' and facetimes me to help me override the miscarriage and send her straight into labor. 

a stressful 5 minutes later, amy has not one, but TWO babies so i had to fix up the baby room again lol BUTTTT it was one boy and one girl haha so i decided to name the boy Silver since i still love the shadamy is silver's ancestor's headcanon, and ofc the baby girl maria and now i gotta make sure two babies are fed smh but genuinely never in my life had so much issues with pregnancies like this!! an emotional rollercoaster and for what

[deeplyobsessed]

ok so i’m gonna ramble in sections

section 1: cgi moustache

FUCKING HILARIOUS like it was so bad it was funny HELP also buck’s hair was season 8 hair too it’s so funny like WHY did they reuse this HAHA

section 2: confession part 1

as short of a scene as it was, this was really nicely shot imo. and the tears in eddie’s eyes when he spoke like RYAN GUZMAN UR SO GOOD. but also how does buck (best friend) rank about girlfriend like hmmmmmmm

section 3: FUCKING ABBY

I CLOCKED IT I KNEW IT i know we always joke about 911 having continuity issues but THIS was such a good way to call back season 1 like insane writing tim minear and i love u for it

section 4: the divorce call

i wish they did more with this call like there was potential to call back to eddie/shannon but they didn’t. other than that i think honestly this is one of the grossest calls they’ve ever been on like genuinely icked the hell out of me with the guts like ugh gross

section 5: josh’s speech

as much as people hate on tommy, i do think josh’s explanation of things does give some sort of context to the way tommy acted in the past. like yeah racism and sexism is bad don’t get me wrong, but tommy did make an effort to change. it’s just that with society and his own work place back then, tommy prob had a lot of internalised homophobia that he expressed negatively outward to others (chim and hen in particular). but josh made a very good point with his speech about pre glee and post glee world (great reference, 10/10) and i think this was one of my favourite parts of this episode

section 6: confession part 2

ok first of all there was literally NO NEED to add that “im straight” “im celibate” part. like that was intentionally written into the script for something bcos that entire section could have been done without the sexuality mention. tim minear i see you. other than that FATHER BRIAN YOU ARE SPEAKING FACTS. my fav line he said was “but we can’t take care of others if we don’t first take care of ourselves”. bcos this is true!! and also a line used in therapy a lot cough. anyway i think the conversation eddie had with the priest was like a wake up call to eddie to start getting his head out of his ass and start working towards something. love this scene 10/10

section 7: brothers and pipes

most of this call was focused on the brothers part more than the well scene call back, tho there was a throw away line from bobby to eddie about how (eddie) wouldn’t fit this time. i do wonder if this happened irl would fire departments legally be authorised to allow children to help with rescues tho. otherwise honestly this was a very cute scene that helped chim get some introspection. i do wish there was more of a well scene call back tho :(

section 8: buck tommy breakup

as a buddie fan, i am overjoyed. but as a buck fan, i am devastated. tommy is actually one of my favourite love interests for buck, and its not just because he’s a dude and sexual awakening all that. i genuinely do think buck and tommy could have had a lot of potential if the show had decided to go through with it, but at the same time ending it here was also a relatively good note. i think in this relationship it wasn’t actually buck who wasn’t ready, it was tommy. tommy is afraid of things not working out in the long run bcos he doesn’t believe in buck’s affection for him being long term. this whole breakup was bcos tommy wasn’t ready imo. i do see the point tommy was trying to make but i also think it was a bit of a dick move to do the whole breakup immediately after buck asked tommy to move in with him. like the timing could have been better tommy. tommy being the one who decided to end things did surprise me tho. but now i feel really sad for buck bcos buck did like tommy a lot, and also as a queer person your first queer relationship is always going to mean a lot to you

section 9: MADNEY MADNEY MADNEY

HOLY MOTHER OF- i didn’t see this coming i didn’t but i am so here for it. the amount of trust and communication between chim and maddie is literal relationship GOALS like they lay out the boundaries and have healthy discussions about having another kid and it’s just so UGHHHH I LOVE YOU also maddie already being pregnant FJSJCKSK MORE BABIES

section 10: eddie, the moustache, and the dance

this. was. everything. the significance of shaving off the moustache. the dancing at the end?? no pants too was a choice. like when eddie flops back onto the couch and you see his smile, it’s like you truly see him deciding to finally forgive himself. maybe not completely, because there’s always going to be some guilt he carries around, but he’s moving forward and i’m so, so happy for him. it’s just a fun goofy feel good scene and i love love love this.

special mention: buddie and the couch

i actually think this is the first time both of them are on the couch together. like sitting next to each other with no one else. RETURN OF THE COUCH THEORY WELCOME BACK. ok but the ending scene?? the way they don’t even need words to communicate like- buck not even bothering to question why eddie doesn’t have pants, and eddie not even questioning why buck is here with beer in the first place. the level of mutual understanding has my HEART IN PIECES

overall this is honestly my fav ep this season and one of my fav eps of all time. i can’t wait to see how the story moves on from here ahhhhhhh

[sodamnradd]

“Give it up, Draco. You found what people spend a lifetime searching for, and you just let her leave without you.” Blaise fell back onto the leather sofa and crossed his ankles, looking pensively into the fire. “What I don’t understand is why. You keep saying that if anyone will win, it’s her. And yet here you are.”

Draco opened his mouth to deny, deny, deny. But what was the point? Blaise had seen them together in the prefects’ bath, and later, when Draco tried brushing it off as a casual hook-up, Blaise had only shaken his head and said, ‘I saw your face,’ as if that was supposed to override any lies that came out of Draco’s mouth.

His stomach had been a tangle of nerves since Granger had kissed him goodbye and disappeared with Potter and Weasley to save the world. That was the issue with Gryffindors, forever killing themselves over the next big heroic deed. He wasn’t like them.

“What would you have done?” sniped Draco. It was easy to cast judgement from afar, but Blaise wasn’t living it. “Would you just turn your back on your mother? On your friends? To hell with everyone if you’re in love?”

Blaise gave him a side-long look, grinning. “Are you in love?”

“You seem to think I am.”

“Do you see a future with her?”

“If the world wasn’t so fucked up?”

“Yeah.”

Draco didn’t really have to imagine it because it’s all he’d been thinking about since he first kissed Granger nine months ago.

It wasn’t just her physical being—the charged, tantalising pull of their bodies like opposing magnets—but a vision of what their life could look like. Granger didn’t need pure-blood persuasion to pave her way into the world. She could be self-made. And Draco would stand proudly beside her, as he did best. He could manage the accounts, pursue his hobbies, while ensuring Granger never felt alone navigating her mountainous ambitions.

Draco lived a satiated life, but with Hermione, all he knew was starvation. She was the one thing he didn’t want to barter or consume in small bites. If he had her, he was going to feast.

“It’s not that simple,” he concluded. “It’s not some playground romance anymore. She’s out there risking her life. I can’t afford to love her how I want if she’s just going to wind up dead.”

“Take this from someone who’s buried seven fathers—death is preventable.”

Draco looked up at Blaise, surprised.

His friend had an eerie look on his face, made worse by the fire casting strange shadows over him, but Draco knew the Zabinis had a complicated relationship with murder. And that’s what he meant: murder was preventable, not death.

“What makes you think I could protect her any better than Potter could?”

“The Dark Lord trusts you, you’re a sneaky fuck, and you’re in love. Nobody will fight harder to win.”

~

Donning a backpack full of survival gear, his wand, and the warmest clothes he owned, Draco used their matching bracelets to Port-Key to Granger the next Saturday morning.

She had woven the bracelets with colourful thread—red and gold for him, green and silver for her—and the next week, Draco had adhered matching charms to them. She didn’t know that he could sense her through it. That when she fingered the cool metal engraved with his constellation at night, he felt her presence. Or that it was a gateway to each other using the right spell.

Maybe he’d known he’d follow her all along.

The bracelet transported Draco to lush, crawling hills and enormous, craggy rocks. The sky hung bright white above him. He could sense Granger’s magic in the air, or maybe it was her perfume drifting in the breeze. He inhaled deeply, feeling closer to her already.

There was nobody around when he heard the gasp directly behind him.

He turned and saw the air wobble. The ward he hadn’t realised was there descended. Granger stood two feet away, eyes wide and lips parted. She was thin and pale and seemed afraid.

Regret washed over him. He should have come sooner.

“How do I know it’s really you?” she demanded, wand clutched tightly by her side, a combination of fear and hope flickering in her eyes.

Draco dropped his bag by his feet, taking three strong strides forward. He framed her cold cheeks in his hands, hoping she saw the look on his face and remembered how much she meant to him. He said, “Because nobody else knows how much I love you.”

He kissed her, and a second later, Granger threw her arms around his neck and kissed him back, sobbing.

“I’m here to stay,” he reassured her, holding her tightly. “I’m here to fight.”

And he thought of Blaise in the Slytherin common room, the only one who knew of Draco’s whereabouts, and their discussions of love and death. And he thought of the future he’d seen with Hermione, and he thought he could have it, maybe even a better version of it. One that didn’t involve him at home, pursuing hobbies, but being worth something, too. He could be that. He wanted to be that.

Draco wanted to feast.

(873 words, inspired by Don't Swallow The Cap by The National)

[the1entirecircus]

Violent Apprentices

MEANWHILE in the bat cave, our heroes talk about their periling issues...

Flash (Barry Allen): ...and now he's back from the dead, and while he isn't killing as many people as before, he is still hurting people to extreme!

Batman: And did August have this level of violence before he became Godspeed?

Flash: No, August was like any other officer in the CCPD. Which is saying something, we have one of the nicer police forces in the country. (That's just a headcanon. Yes ACAB, but these bastards are nice)

Batman: The way you're describing him reminds me of one my old protege. Jason Todd.

Flash: The Red Hood?

Batman: Yes. Except, Jason learned the hard way of why he shouldn't kill. Although he did return to using guns.

Flash: Really? That's seems very...reductive.

Batman: Yeah, I was surprised too.

Flash: Heh, imagine if they met. Wouldn't that be terrific.

Batman: Don't make me laugh, Barry. It would be the end of the world if that happened.

Flash: Yeah it would...

*Meanwhile in a more crime-orientated area of Central City, danger was afoot as the Red Hood monitored Penguin and Captain Cold and The Rogues.*

Penguin: As you can see here, we have the latest equipment in subzero freezing based weaponry. Perfect for handling those pesky speedsters! Wank!

Captain Cold: How much for the freeze grenades?

Red Hood: Snart, they're free if you really wanted them.

*All weapon were aimed at the anti-hero, ready to fire.*

Penguin: RED HOOD?! You followed me all the way here!

Red Hood, with both of his guns brought out: Yeah, because you're not supposed to be here. Now pack things up, and waddle your ass back to Blackgate before I make.

Captain Cold: I don't think you're the one to talk here. Me, my buds and sis take on the Flash every day. A guy who looks like he came from Mortal Kombat and carries guns doesn't scare us.

Red Hood: Really? Well, I've fought Mr. Freeze before. You're just a watered down copy.

Captain Cold: Oh you are so...*a look of fear strikes Cold's face*...MIRROR MASTER NOW!

*Mirror Master rapidly fired his mirror gun at the equipment the Penguin had presented. Penguin squaked both from fury and surprise. He cursed at Captain Cold as he and the Rogues teleported away in a flash of light. But then came a brighter light. A white blinding light. Screams from Penguin's men followed as the light zoomed around the area. Red Hood reached for something in his utility belt but stopped when the white blur caught and picked up Penguin.*

Penguin: What are you??

*The man in the white and gold costume resembling the Flash's uniform pulled the crime lord closer.*

"I am Godspeed"

Red Hood: Put the crime lord down!

*Godspeed glared at Red Hood and the guns he pointed at him with. The masked vigilante tossed Penguin aside and approached the Gothamite. Red Hood pointed at Penguin.*

Red Hood: Go anywhere, and I will make you a legless bird, got it?

Godspeed: I can stop a pullet the second it leaves a gun, who do you think you are?

Red Hood: I'm Red Hood, I usually work in Gotham City.

Godspeed: Red Hood...the crime lord?

Red Hood: For a time, now I just do vigilante work against Gotham's elites. Basically what batman did before the crazies arrived.

*Red Hood walked over and cuffed Penguin.*

Red Hood: I'm starved, wanna grab some Big Belly Burger?

Godspeed: ...why not?

---

*our Anti-heroes munched and chewed on their burgers as they discussed their various adventures as masked vigilantes while sitting in a big belly burger.*

Red Hood: Are you sure you didn't hear of me? Because I had similar reasoning when I fought Batman. Although it was focused on just killing the Joker.

Godspeed: That was 100% my idea, I had no intentions of copying your actions. I also fully intended on killing everyone in the Flash's rogues gallery. But I did emphasize Reverse Flash because he killed Flash's mom. I honestly thought Flash would agree with me. I feel dumb for thinking that now, and for wanting to kill those people.

Red Hood: Mutual feelings, except I'll never feel bad for trying to kill Joker. That fucker has it coming.

Godspeed: How is he still alive? I know the Gotham justice system is bad, but I didn't think it was that terrible?

Red Hood: It is shit, but he just keeps coming back. Rumor has it, he's immortal. I don't believe it though. I think he was just a guy who wanted attention.

Godspeed: That makes more sense to me. He does seem like an attention whore. Reverse Flash is similar in my opinion. Except he specifically wants the attention from Flash. I mean he did kill my brother just to help motivate me into being Godspeed so that I would be enemies with the Flash.

Red Hood: He killed your brother? Joker killed my mom the same day he killed me! Well, he used a bomb, but still.

Godspeed: Joker killed you? Reverse Flash killed me!

Red Hood: That is so coincidentally strange!

Godspeed: I know!

"Oh you have got to be kidding me..."

*Both vigilantes look and see Barry Allen in his civilian clothing*

Red Hood: (Whispering) Is that...?

Godspeed: (whispers back) Yup. (speaks normally) What? Never seen two vigilantes eating at Big Belly Burger?

Red Hood: They do it all the time in Bat Burger over in Gotham.

Barry: ...I'm tired.

---

Flash: (while running through Central City) And so they're just talking about how similar they are. I think they're friends now.

Batman: (in the bat cave listening to the communication link) I'm not surprised, Red Hood was following a lead that Penguin was going to give new weapons to the Rogues.

Flash: Oh...wait what?!