#who's to say I'm not just a whispery ghost
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is there a reason you usually answer asks with a . and talk in the tags? i got confused when i first saw that bc usually when people do that its a 'presented without commentary' thing but you do have commentary haha it feels like you're answering just in whispers like a ghost
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#who's to say I'm not just a whispery ghost#no it's just an old habit#talking in the tags feels more casual and pressureless it's a pretty common tumblr thing#if I do that my (sometimes dumb and rambly or very personal) ask posts are less likely to be reblogged#and leave their target audience which is people who follow this blog and know these characters and their context#I don't want to turn reblogs off completely either because sometimes people reblog so they can write their response in their tags#the dot is there because you can't publish the ask if you leave the main text field empty#it's not that sensible but I just like doing it that way#answered#anonymous
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Phone sex.
Characters included: Price, Ghost, Gaz, Soap, just the 141 today, others like Konig, Valeria, Alejandro etc will be in the next.
Includes: Phone Sex, Praising, Jerking off, Talking through it, Nicknames like sweetheart, love, other ones etc but no name use, AFAB Reader but no pronouns specified or looks etc, NOT PROOFED.(also I know the images looked odd center I tried..)
Word count: 2,806.
John Price:
Price was out on another mission/deployment, it wasn't incredibly long really, just the usual amount for when he'd be sent away. He'd always text you and what not, pictures of him after a long mission or just to text you in general, you'd receive ones like:
"Hope your morning is treating you well love.❤️"
"Just finished a mission, gonna hop in the shower, love you darlin'."
and so on, he was a man who wouldn't call unless it was needed, or a really big issue, so that's why when you got out the shower, wrapped in your robe toweling your hair and what not, settling onto the bed noticing you'd miss not one but two calls from him and that settled worry in your stomach.
Carefully you picked up the phone and dialed him, anxiously getting up to pace about, then when he picked up you heard a pant of a breath escape his lips on the other end.
"John-! Oh my god, Are you alright? You called me two times?"
Your tone held worry, it was touching to him, "Yeah, Yeah dontcha worry I'm just fine darlin'." He managed out but it sounded like he was biting back other noises that you couldn't quite pinpoint.
"John..Are—Are you alright? You sound pained?”
"M'fine darlin' Just..solvin' an issue, How bout you go on about your day, would make it a lot better." He huffed out slightly, and the soft sound of a belt coming undone on the other end caught your attention, that's when it dawned on you what he was getting at it.
The cheekiest smile spread across your lips, carefully you sat back onto the bed,
"If you say so.." You trailed off slightly waiting for his response earning a mere grunt on return.
Oh you were gonna have fun with this.
"Well..Today I went out shopping with Gisele yeah?" You hummed as you looked at your nails, "Mhm mhm..Anythin' catch your eyes?" He asked and you could hear the soft pants between his normal breathing which grew shallow.
Perfect.
"Actually yeah somethings did," Price was a thigh man, he loved them in shorts, he loved them in pants, but he really loved them in skirts, didn't matter the size or length. "Some new skirts." you could hear the way his breath caught.
You knew damn well he was picturing it already, Price on the other hand was pumping his aching length, swiping a calloused thumb over the tip with a gruff exhale, his pumping slow and lazy, then you mentioned the fact of you buying new skirt and that rush came to him.
He couldn't help the way he sped up his pace, his breathing shallow and in pants, low whispery gruff cuss words escaping, he could hear the soft laugh of a giggle that you let out and he couldn't help the breathless chuckle he let out.
"You enjoyin' this much?" He asked sarcastically, "Come on..If I'm gonna help you I'm gonna have fun with it, haven't seen you or felt you in awhile." You said matter of factly.
Price grunted softly in response, "Well keep talkin' then..Can't help the way your voice sends me darlin'." he said, no demanded as if desperate for your voice.
"Bet you look real pretty right now John..Your aching cock all flushed just like your face can get." You laid on your stomach with a hum as you twirled your now damp hair around your finger, a devilish smile on your face at his soft groans. "And I can bet your thinking about me in my skirts, not just my mini ones I know that, all of them." Your tone was so sure and so pleasing to his ears.
His pace sped up, the sounds of slick skin picked up by your ears on your end, letting out a satisfied hum, "I can tell..Your breathing is getting rougher, shallower, your liking that image huh?" you murmured as you rolled to lay on your back imagining him with his fist around his length desperate over you.
"Fuck..Ain't gonna last much longer with you talking that way." he manages out, the sounds picking up in pace, "Aren't you just dirty when your desperate?" you teased with a small laugh as you hummed. "Can't wait for you to be home.." you trailed off slightly, "Can't wait to hug you..kiss you..be stuffed full of you." that's what sent him, a strangled groan had you aching between your legs as soft pants and huffs followed after, "Did I help?" you asked and he could hear the smug smile.
"Course ya did, but you also just gave me a whole new reason to look forward to bein' home."
Simon “Ghost” Riley:
Ghost usually wasn't a desperate man, really he wasn't, but something about being away from you for so long had him itching to touch you, feel you, see you, hear you. Then you sent him a photo of your nails that you just got done and It had him resorting to last outcome he’d go for right off the bat.
He dialed you, not long after you sent him the picture he dialed you, you were driving home when you picked up, using the Bluetooth of your car to talk to him without a worry.
“Hey darling? Whatcha callin’ for?”
“Missed ya voice.”
That’s all he grunted out and that was fine by you, you knew how Simon was so it didn’t really bother you. “Go on tell me about your day.” He said, no, demanded as he sat back on his bed, undoing his belt as discreetly as he could getting all of it out of the way as his aching cock sprang free, precum beading at the tip.
“Well, as you saw I went and got my nails done today, lovely color for me really. Dontcha think?” You weren’t fully aware of what he was doing on the other end, as he swiped his thumb over the tip, an exhale muffled by his balaclava. “Simon?” You asked again snapping him back.
“Hm?”
“My nails Simon, did you like the color?”
“Yeah, looked real nice on ya love.”
His breathing sounded shallow but you had just assumed made he’d done some rigorous exercise or something so you paid it no mind, unbeknownst to you he began to pump his length in slow languid thrust occasionally picking up speed but not too much. He couldn’t believe he was this desperate but he didn’t wanna tell you.
“Go on, I’m all—all ears.” He managed out through slightly gritted teeth to bite back any prominent noises, you raised your brow but you just chalked it up to Simon being Simon.
“Alrighty, and then before my nails right? Went out and got the cutest stuff for Zelda! I know she won’t be a big fan at first but that’s just how cats are and—“
You went on and on, and that’s when he kind of zoned out only focusing on your voice but not your words, so lost in imagining your hands in place of his pumping his cock as he looks down at you.
Your occasional kisses to the tip and your eyes always finding his no matter what, he was so focused he didn’t notice the shallowed breathes and pants he was letting out.
And you were too busy going on and on about some outfit you bought for your cat that you two adopted that you didn’t notice right away, his mind was foggied with the images of you with your lips around his dick, gagging softly around as drool pooled around the corners of your mouth and how pretty you looked swallowing all of his..
“Fuck..” was what he blurted put as he came, through gritted teeth and huffs which now caught your attention making you a bit more worried. “Darling? Are you alright?” You chimed in bringing him right back.
“Yeah just can’t wait to see ya.”
Kyle “Gaz” Garrick:
Most times when he’d be away for long times like this you’d send him photos and videos, the first time you sent him those he was aching, he was done for after that mission.
This time was no different, you’d recently bought a new bralette that you knew he’d love to see even if he wouldn’t be home for a bit, so when you tried it on at home you snapped a photo in the mirror and sent it his way assuming he’d still be out and doing things.
But he was infact on his way back to his room at this time, taking his cap off with an exhale as he opened his door, his phone vibrating to life in his pocket as he retrieved it from there your contact popping up causing a smile to make it ways to his face as he shut the door.
Then he opened the message entirely, image and all..
“Fuck me..” Gaz breathed out as his hat settled back on his head, his weight settling against his door for a moment, the steady aching tightness of his pants becoming more noticeable by the second. He debated he really did, was he this desperate for you?
Yes. Yes he was. He quickly sat on the edge of his bed, fingers hovering over your contact before doing it. As soon as it began to ring he pulled his pants and boxers down just enough to spring his aching length free with a harsh exhale. Then your voice rang through, “Gaz!” You called cheerfully.
“I didn’t think you’d call so soon!” You had already changed into some nightwear, working on putting laundry away that you should’ve done a bit ago really. “Aren’t you busy or somethin?” You asked, he didn’t think hearing your voice would have such an effect on him but boy he was wrong.
He swiped a thumb over the leaking angry tip as his mind had slightly blurred out your words, “Gaz?” You questioned with a raises brow as you carefully folded more clothes. “Huh—What?” He blinked back to reality as he set a slow pace softly rutting into his fist.
“I asked if you liked the bralette, the one I showed you today?” You asked with a hum, and he groaned he couldn't muffle that even if he tried, "Ohh..You liked it that much huh?" He could practically hear the slight cheeky smugness to your tone and he exhaled as he picked up the pace a bit. "What do you think huh?"
You laughed a bit as you began to stack some of the clothes, shrugging to adjust the way the phone sat by your ear, "Dunno, Never had you so desperate to the point of calling me." You hummed as you continued your little chore, "Fuck..Yeah well it's been awhile since I've seen ya for real, and heard your pretty little voice." Gaz murmured out as the sound of slicked skin caught your attention by now a little cheeky smile quirked your lips.
"I didn't think my voice would help much though.." your tone trailed off slightly as you picked up on his shallow breathing and the sound of whispered curse words, carefully you moved the clothes to the side, sitting down one leg over the other, a hand propping you up and the other holding your phone. "But I bet I know how it can."
That caught his attention, cause as of right now, just being able to hear you and your cheeky tone was enough for him. "You've probably been imagining my thighs..my lips..my tits, haven't you?" you asked, your tone trying to hold a slight sternness to it.
A slight groan of an inhale was what Gaz managed out but you tutted, "Nope, Have or Haven't you if your so desperate." You hummed as you laid back. He huffed out slightly, "Shit..Course I have," You could hear his voice becoming breathy by the minute.
On the other end Gaz had begun to rut and buck desperately into his hand wishing it was any part of you..maybe especially your tits. "Mhm..Mhm, I know how much you love all those photos and videos, always been one for getting a glimpse of me." You couldn't help the giggled that escape as his groaned and gritted responses being just cuss words.
"Can't wait for you to come on home ya know that? To cuddle with ya, Go on our morning walks..the things you do to walk me up for those walks." You eluded to the mornings when he wakes you up with either eating you out with lazy sloppy kisses and licks or soft kisses to the neck and that had his head reeling. Hunching over as he groaned, cumming onto his exposed thighs and some of his hand.
Groans and pants, strings of cuss words and what not escaping his parted lips as he slowly came down from his high, "Did that help?" you chimed in.
"You have no idea."
Johnny "Soap" Mactavish:
With an exhale proud to have finally cleaned the house, something you put off today in favor of other things until you had nothing else to do, with a proud huff you grabbed a towel and went and got a good hot shower in sending Soap a sweet little text that you didn't see a problem with.
"Hoppin' in the shower, hope your getting some kind of relaxtion now! xo"
Then you set your phone down and hopped into the shower to enjoy a hot one to relax your muscles and what not. At the same time all day you'd been on Soap's mind and he couldn't figure out as to why, you two called most nights and texted throughout the day when he had the time.
But something in him ached and yearned for you, and he swore it was like magic when your text buzzed his phone in his pocket as he laid with his arms behind his head. He pulled it from his pocket with a stretch, opening your text, that's when ideas began to pop into his head.
You in the shower, water running off your skin, the steam creating a soft haze..him joining you in there and fucking you against the shower wall, hands entangled in your wet hair. God it drove him mad, he leaned his head back against the headboard, arm over his eyes as he tried to drift his thoughts else where, off you and those steamy moments.
But somehow..you had the most impeccable and worst timing, dialing him for your usual call, and he almost dropped his phone, that ache returning when your voice chimed in.
"Hey Johnny!" You called cheerfully and he bit back any groan or shaky inhale, he rested his phone between his shoulder and ear, was he really this damn horny? yes, yes he was this horny. His hands made work of his belt and what not, pulling all those layers in his way down just enough, "Hey there love." he tried to make his voice and breathing sound less shallow as he rubbed some of the beading precum off the tip, falling into slow methodical rubbing with his fist.
You smiled happy to hear his voice as you settled onto your bed, putting him on speaker as you dried your hair up, as he tried to focus to hear more of your voice, he asked, "How was ya day huh? Anythin' good happen?" Soap asked as he added a little pressure biting back a strained moan.
"Well..I did finally get the house done but I did other things as well even if I had used them as procrastinating!" He just responded with 'Uh-huh' and 'Yeah', you were too busy chatting away to notice his breathing picking up and becoming shorter. "Then I got some more rubber ducks for ya, found these funny lookin' ones just like the one you've got now!" you said with a laugh and he couldn't help the way his rubbing on his aching cock sped up chasing that familiar coil.
You went on and on, talking as much as you wanted to, his head lolled back slightly his phone sliding to rest between his neck and shoulder as his pumped and pumped, imagining you, your lips, all of it, your smile and the way you look at him. God he missed you.
Then that coil formed, his movements became erratic and hasty chasing that euphoric feeling eventually reaching it with a bit back groan of a moan. The noise bringing you back from your chatter.
"Johnny? You alright?" you asked raising a brow as you picked your phone up this time.
"Uh-huh..just made a bit of a mess, thank's for callin' me up love."
#cod smut#konig cod#price smut#captain john price#captain price#cod mw2#cod price#cod x reader#simon ghost riley#ghost x reader#ghost smut#soap mctavish#soap smut#soap cod#kyle gaz garrick#gaz smut#gaz x reader
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ok here’s a rough draft on some pjsk ocs please dont be mean i dont know how to write
preT*leaves
(pretty tea leaves... with the asterisk from pasupare because i'm unoriginal)
british tea party themed (think morfonica tea party set outfit vibes)
2 girls 2 guys
they do dainty little dances..
sekai is like a little palace
start with miku, rin, len
they were members of the tea party club (yeah thats a club now) (started as a joke) and then one of them suggested they should form a unit and start singing. they did because idk they ran out of tea to taste
i’m expanding their covers to any jpop song i like.
ibitsuna kotoba (dazbee)
tenshi ni fureta yo (k-on)
cat (milgram)
coquettrie dancer (yuu miyashita)
ok actual characters time!!
[placeholder name 1] (girl 1)
stage name: cinderella
voice is whispery. like shizuku/honami/kanade
she is literally only seen at club meetings. the other members of this unit have never seen her outside the club and she leaves before anyone can get her contact
mysterious
quiet
was the one who suggested the unit idea
also founded the club
17
[placeholder name 2] (girl 2)
stage name: candle
a tad strange
claims she can see ghosts and talk to them
wide eyed like a paranoid bug
kind of like the "token weird girl" of the class. no one dislikes her she's just there like the silly little bug in the corner of the class
carries candles around and will light one and wave it around you if you say you are feeling any negative emotion
16
[placeholder name 3] (guy 1)
stage name: ruler
mature
seems like a mom friend and he is but then you realize he actually believes in all of candle's weird exorcism talk. encourages it
very smart, occasionally very scary
???
17
[placeholder name 4] (guy 2)
stage name: charm
character who's done with things (i love grumpy people who hate everything. sorry if its overdone but actually im not sorry theyre my characters)
really likes idol rhythm games so was secretly excited when cinderella suggested forming a unit. his first thought was "oh my god we're just like morfonica..."
actually very good at being prim and proper and nice
16
name suggestions are SO welcome like i need names please
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A little Don't Worry Darling HateFic, which is something I might have just invented
(I mean probably not because fandom is amazing, but yes, I am writing this little ficlet on the fly because I'm so mad at that fucking movie for being so goddamn bad. Spoilers for all the worst parts).
Alice presses her whole body to headquarters, and there's a violent, sharp yank in her lower belly. When she opens her eyes, she's staring at a gauzy canopy covered in fairy lights. There's something touching her face. Something touching her legs. Something in her arm. In her left arm.
It's an IV. The tube leads to a clear solution that Alice doesn't recognize but can guess at. There are lots of clear things one gets in a bag from a hospital or medical supply company. She doesn't know how long she's been asleep, but she is certain from Jack's yelling that it was more than a day or two. Whatever's in the bag is what's kept her alive.
What's kept her asleep?
She shakes her head at the feeling of something around her eyes, and she tries to lift her right arm to use her hand to feel it. Her right hand is caught in something. She tries to lift her head to see, but something's holding her back. She squeezes her fingers around the thing, and after a moment, she realizes what it is.
Jack's hand.
Jack's hand holding hers.
Jack's dead hand holding hers. Like they fell asleep in some cute moment.
Except that is absolutely what's not happened at all.
Alice breathes out something like a scream. Her throat is moist, but her vocal cords are clearly unused. What comes out instead of a scream is a whispery, high sound like you'd make for a ghost story.
She shakes her arm, and it doesn't move like it should. Doesn't move like there's well-trained muscle to help her out. At the beginning of her surgical residency, another doctor had told her that a good gym routine was vital to staying at the top of her game. It upped her endorphins and her stamina, and you wouldn't think ribs were hard to break through, but you'd be surprised.
"You don't need the gym for that," Jack had said when Alice had mentioned planning to up her twice-weekly routine to include a day of strength training. "You want endorphins, we can just fuck."
"You're gross," she'd said and laughed. And they'd fucked that night, carefree and laughing like they always did.
She wonders now, as she shakes her arm again and again, dislodging his fingers a tiny bit of pressure at the time, if he'd really believed their sex life could solve all her problems.
There's a shout, and a loud smashing sound. Alice freezes, Jack's fingers three-quarters dislodged. She hears murmuring and heavy steps. She wonders if it's Frank's men coming to find her in the real world.
She counts the seconds silently, hoping they'll find her and kill her. Hoping they won't. She doesn't know.
At 37 seconds, the door opens, and a flashlight makes her squeeze her eyes shut.
"Shit. Fuck," says a familiar voice, and Alice risks opening her eyes again because it can't be--
"Alice."
"...Bunny?" Alice tries to say, but it comes out a painful whisper.
"You've been trapped for five months," Bunny says. "I've got a medic with me. We're going to undo your restraints."
"But--"
"The kids are alive and well," Bunny says. "Older than when you met them. I'll explain once we get you out of here."
"Who--"
Bunny smiles and reaches for Alice's left wrist, undoing the buckle as someone else starts to work on Alice's ankles. "Senior Agent Bunny McClair, FBI. And before you ask, that is really my legal name."
Alice's laugh is as dry as her whisper, but something in her soul feels really fucking good. "Nice to meet you," she manages to get out, and with one final shake of her arm, she dislodges Jack's fingers for good.
*
She's underweight, and there's muscular atrophy. The doctor, once Alice explains she was in surgical residency, is happy to speak to her using jargon.
"We'll get you started on PT immediately," she says. "You're not so weak I think we can't reverse it, but I always prefer an aggressive plan in these cases."
"Do you mean atrophy or women getting found after being trapped like I was?" Alice asks. Her voice is a little better. She's been allowed ice chips as they've checked her over.
"Both," the doctor says. She gives Alice a look that's equal parts sympathy and anger. "You're our fourth one from that fucking place."
Alice wants to sit up straighter, but her back muscles are worse off than the rest. It makes sense to her. It seems Jack did some isometric exercises with her limbs but failed to worry about her torso. It's not an uncommon issue for people who try to take care of a disabled spouse at home without a decent amount of medical knowledge or help from a home health service.
"Who else is out?" Alice asks.
"Agent McClair can tell you," the doctor says.
"Right," Alice replies. "Ethics and shit."
The doctor smiles at her. "Exactly. Ethics and shit."
*
Alice sleeps for fourteen hours. When she wakes up, there's a polite nurse with a bland but nutritional breakfast. Alice manages to eat half of it.
"I used to murder twice as many eggs," she mutters in annoyance.
The nurse's polite façade disappears, and she grins openly. "You have PT this afternoon. I'm sure you'll improve your score tomorrow."
Alice grunts in amusement as the nurse leaves. A moment later, Bunny--Agent McClair, Alice reminds herself--walks into the room. She's wearing a pearl gray pants suit with a silk, pussy bow blouse and very tall shoes.
"Alice, may I sit?" she asks.
"Yeah, of course."
Bunny sits in the chair that's pressed against the wall next to the bed, and Alice gives up as thinking of her by any other name. It's just not possible right now. She's physically strained and mentally exhausted, and Bunny's not just wearing a pussy bow and high heels, but she's also wearing a string of pearls and earrings to match.
"Are you into the retro look?"
Bunny chuckles. "I am," she says. "I have been forever. I advised on the whole look I should have inside the virtual compound."
"Virtual compound," Alice mutters. "How did you--if you didn't--I mean." She shakes her head and closes her eyes to think. It takes her longer than she'd like to get a question formed. She feels as scattered as she did inside Victory after the electroshock. "Who are you?"
"I'm Bunny McClair--and that's my maiden name," Bunny replies. "The people in charge of the FBI's undercover operation into Victory used me as a template for the man playing my husband--"
"Dean's not your husband?" Alice blurts out, feeling foolish the second the question leaves her mouth.
"Dean's another agent," Bunny says. "I run the team in the field. He's an undercover agent who spends his days debriefing with me and doing deep dive searches on everyone in Victory."
"But...he chased me," Alice says. "I...I hit him with my car."
"I lied to you more than once when you came to me," Bunny says, and she looks deeply apologetic. "I told you yesterday, the kids aren't dead--"
"Do they know me at all?" Alice asks.
"They know of you," Bunny replies. "When we all realized I was the perfect person to be used for the physical template inside Victory, I made sure to get their consent to use their old pictures and videos to set up the reason why I'd be in there."
"Who plays you?"
"A variety of agents. There's a backdoor hack attached to 'my' eye pieces that allow us to switch out agents every few hours."
Alice reaches up and touches the sides of her eyes where the eye pieces had been. There are calluses there she'd never had before. the nurses had offered her lotion, but she'd refused it. She'd apply it too much, she knows, just trying to rid herself of the feel of captivity.
"Do a lot of people play Dean?"
"No. Since he doesn't need to be there all the time, he can just play himself. But he knows the schedules of the other agents so he knows who he's...acting...against at any given time."
"Acting."
Bunny shrugs and gives Alice the same rueful smile she's always had. "For lack of a better word."
Alice licks her lips. "Is Jack dead?"
Bunny sighs. "No, and I'm sorry I had to lie to you in the moment about that."
"You said he died in real life," Alice replies, and she barks a laugh so loud and sudden and unexpected that she covers her mouth. "I--"
Bunny drags her chair closer and drapes her arms over the bedrail. "The agent playing me told me what happened. I laughed, too." She throws up her hands in a mockery of fear. "They die in real life!"
Alice's laugh this time is a bit quieter, but still as surprising. "I shouldn't--"
"You should," Bunny says, and her hand hovers over Alice's arm before she pulls it back. "Every fucking one of you we get out of there deserves to laugh at whatever makes them laugh. Mary did the best she could under pressure, but even she admits the 'they die in real life' was a last-ditch attempt to basically shock you into slowing down enough that we could help you. He was unresponsive when you woke up because we traced where he was and fed his tech a virus that incapacitated him. "
"Oh," Alice says. "You were--I mean Mary--"
"It's an imperfect system," Bunny says, and this time she touches her fingertips to Alice's arm before curling her whole hand around it at Alice's nod of consent. "I wish we could have gotten Margaret out sooner, but she--"
"Is she okay?"
"She's safe," Bunny says. "She's getting very good help. She wants to see you, but it's going to be a couple of weeks."
"What?! Why?!"
"Because her doctors say so." Bunny's gaze gets sharp and deadly serious, and Alice realizes that the similar look she'd seen in Victory when she'd admitted going to Headquarters is nothing compared to it. "And you'll get your own doctors who will agree you're healthy enough before you see her, too," Bunny continues. "You've both been through a tremendous trauma, and you came out within days of each other. We want to be sure you're both truly safe before we put you in the same room."
Alice lets that thought wash over her. She shifts her arm so she can clutch Bunny's hand. "I know you're not the Bunny I knew in there," she says, "but I feel like you're trying to do right by the Alice you heard about from everyone playing you."
"I am," Bunny says. "The same as I did for Margaret and Lydia and Carol."
"I don't know Lydia and Carol."
"We got them out shortly before you and Margaret were taken hostage."
Hostage. The word rings in Alice's ears, and her hand goes slack.
"That's what I was, wasn't I?"
"Yes," Bunny says with that no-nonsense edge Alice knows very well. "But not anymore. And not ever again. We're going to shut it down, Alice. I promise you that."
"How long will it take?"
"I don't know," Bunny replies, and it's the willingness to be unsure that makes Alice trust her all the more.
#don't worry darling#fan fic#fic#fuck this movie's half-assed attempts at being an updated stepford wives#stepford wives doesn't need your fucking help#especially with it being so half-assed#so i'll fucking fix it myself#post-canon#hatefic
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