#who has a damn good product - then what would they do with a brand new one. with nothing to recommend them?

[lady-raziel]

idk man i know times are hard but i can't help but feel that watcher putting all their eggs in the basket that is their own streaming service is a bad call. like sure i totally get wanting a platform where you have full control both creatively and financially but i feel they might be misjudging how much loyalty non-hardcore fans might have for what they're creating. in every internet fandom there's a subsection of people willing to pay with actual money to support the creators they enjoy, and that's what services like patreon are for. but to expect that casual viewers will sign up and pay a monthly fee to get access to just watcher content when a large portion of them were likely just watching the content because it was free and accessible on youtube assumes that someone who isn't a diehard fan won't just go "oh well" and find something else on youtube that IS still free? that seems like a miscalculation to me. the massive fanbases online content creators have may literally be only possible because the content is available to anyone-- it seems foolish to assume that every single one of those fans is going to stick around once you try to upsell them.

i hope this new venture goes well for the watcher crew. I really do. but i also know that a lot of brands and startups that bank on the loyalty they earned when their product was free or low cost and expect that to sustain them while they try to do something that historically has not gone well for the vast majority of businesses. at best, they'll have halved their fanbase by alienating those who can't or don't want to pay and made it much more difficult for remaining fans to create fandom products like memes or gifs that promote their shows on social media. at worst, they'll discover in the near future the independent streaming service model is unsustainable with only the fans they have left and by that point they'll have already deleted themselves from youtube and made it impossible to come back to the level of success they had before. any attempt to return to youtube will be an admission of a critical miscalculation and i doubt many remaining fans will tolerate the back and forth. they'll have crippled their credibility, relevancy, and fanbase loyalty over a very short period of time-- and i don't know if it would even be possible to come back and still be beloved after all that.

worst of all-- if the watcher streaming service crashes and burns after they've already removed all their content from youtube, all the watcher shows are essentially going to become lost media, only accessible via reuploaders willing to risk a copy strike or if you know someone who has a copy downloaded. given how genuinely good the watcher content is in the sea of lackluster youtube mush, that really seems like a damn shame.

i hope the watcher team sees how everyone is responding and decides to course correct before it's too late and get away with only the hit to their reputation that they've already taken by announcing this, instead of pushing forward on a path that might lose them everything instead. nothing i've said here is with any hate intended toward anyone involved or those who are excited about the new service, but this just seems like a really ill-advised decision to me.

[gothcsz]

imagine javier peña as a pornstar holy shit-

gif by @underbetelgeuse | Pornstar!Javier x Pornstar!OFC x Fem!Reader | ~4.5k wc | Explicit. Minors DNI. | Read Part 2 Here | Series Masterlist |

Summary: You're a camerawoman that shoots pornos. Javi's the pornstar you can't stand. So why is it that you're so affected by him during this honeymoon scene between him and his co-star?

Tags: smut, voyeurism(?), unprotected p in v sex, fingering, oral (f receiving), oral (m receiving), no use of Y/N, reader doesn't fuck javi in this i'm sorry, yes it's steve murphy as the sound guy, unbeta'd asf we're here for the dirty vibes, other shit i’m probably forgetting.

A/N: well my beloved, this spiraled into something i wasn't expecting but i hope you enjoy, hehe 🖤 shoutout to my lovely mutual @almostempty for summoning the threesome demon that inspired me to finish this.

You’re not a prude. Sex isn’t aversive to you. And you suppose it can’t be considering what it is that you do for work.

A camerawoman for dirty films. Not a director, just the lucky girl that points and shoots. It’s not a bad gig, even though sometimes you do wish it paid a little more. Then you’d be able to drop your bartending job.

Recording people fucking all day then tending the bar all night, you rarely ever have time for yourself or any of the hobbies that you’ve attempted to start but haven’t nurtured simply because there aren’t enough hours in the day. 

During your downtime, you’re either sleeping or tending to your shit apartment that’s conveniently located above Lucky’s–– your night job. The only reason you can afford to live in Los Angeles is because of the cheap rent there and well, beggars can’t be choosers.

You hit the button on the elevator, currently taking you to the sixth floor of the surprisingly nice hotel the production company has booked a room in for tonight’s shoot.

Once you make it to room 606, you’re greeted by Steve, the sound guy. “You’re early.”

“Daddy got us a new toy and I wanted to test it out before we shot.” There’s a playful smile on your lips as you carefully show off the brand new camera bag with the device inside.

Steve whistles lowly, stepping aside to let you into the room. Looks very typical. Nice, grand bed in the center of the space. Desk, television stand, blah blah blah, and a bar cart.

You suavely make your way towards it, eyeing the small bottles that littered the glass top.

“Surprised you even got that thing. He’s as cheap as they come.”

You shrug, uncapping the small Fireball plastic bottle and swiftly downing it, the burn familiar and taste delicious. “I know, but considering how much money we’re making him, maybe he’s starting to realize our worth.”

You both share a knowing look then laugh. As if. That man would find any way to cut a corner. It’s honestly surprising how well his pornos do.

“Who are we shooting today?” You ask casually, beginning to set out the camera and all its attachments neatly on the desk.

“Lexxie Gold and…” He trails off, lanky form walking over to where his equipment is half set up, pulling out a tattered notebook that he flips through until he lands on the intended page. “Javier Peña.”

You can’t help the grimace that crosses over your face. Great. You’ve shot Peña a few times, each with a story that reminds you how much you dislike the guy.

Sure he seems to be a good fuck— but man was he cocky, annoying, and so damn full of himself.

Just because you have the biggest dick in the world, doesn’t mean you have to act like one.

“How fun.” Your sarcasm isn’t lost on the blonde man across from you and he doesn’t press— knowing you don’t get along with the star.

You curiously start messing around with the camera, flitting through its different settings, taking random videos of Steve as he finishes setting up while you chastise him playfully from the other side. 

Your fucking around is disrupted by a heavy knock on the door then the familiar voice of your boss and the director, Robbie, and you let him in with a brief hey.

The scene is simple enough: a honeymoon. How romantic. He wants to focus on close ups, hence why he bought the new camera.

“Gotta show them how pretty and erotic it really is.”

“I don’t really think they’re watching for the riveting cinematography.”

He shoots you a look and you raise your arms defensively before shrugging your shoulders and getting back to making some last minute camera adjustments.

Steve helps you finish dressing the place up, making the hotel room look like a lover’s getaway. Rose petals everywhere, moody lighting, it helps that the sun has fully set to really set the scene.

Not long after do Lexxie and Javier show up, his arm thrown around her shoulders, seemingly having met up on the ride up the elevator. She’s giggling over something he’s whispered in her ear, pushing at his chest playfully.

You suppose that’s why he’s so good at what he does— that goddamn charisma that seems to charm the underwear off of any woman, hell even some men, that cross his path. 

His chemistry with his co-stars is what’s made him so popular in the industry. Aside from his appearance: cut jaw, full and fitting pornstache, golden lean body and nice cock; Javier ate pussy like his life depended on it and fucked women into oblivion— he usually ended up leaving set with one on his arm.

You remember one time his prowess had been so magnetizing, that he ended up taking the makeup artist home. The fucking makeup artist.

But things with you are different, somehow. You can feel it, he can too. Maybe it’s because you’re a no bullshit type of person that just shows up to do your job then you’re out.

In the beginning, he had attempted to flirt with you, but you weren’t really in the market to reciprocate.

A shock to anyone who meets him because what do you mean you didn’t jump at the chance to be charmed by Javier Peña?

You don’t mix business with pleasure, no matter if the pleasure seems to outweigh the business. 

And since then he’s made it his life’s mission, it feels like, to push your buttons until you’re lit up like a fucking soundboard.

The flirting, petty comments, sometimes weaponized incompetence just to get you to move the camera into a more desirable position for him— yeah it really irks you.

With it being a simple, smaller shoot today: it’s only you, the director, Steve and the two stars in the room.

As Lexxie finishes doing some last minute touch ups in the bathroom, Steve and Robbie head out to the balcony for a quick smoke, leaving you in the room with Javier as he checks his appearance in the full-length mirror by your equipment.

The shoot is starting with them already half undressed, so he’s got an unbuttoned white collared shirt on, his toned chest on full display, with a pair of dress pants hanging low on his hips. He’s not wearing underwear, so you get a peek of the prominent V of his pelvis and the enticing trail of dark hair leading below the fabric.

Goddamn him.

“Lookin’ like somethin’ crawled up your ass and died, sweetheart. All good?” He asks, no real concern in his voice but the typical condescending tone he uses when he speaks to you.

You ignore him, wiping off the lens of your camera, lowkey wanting to down another small bottle of liquor. 

“It’s rude not to speak when you’re spoken to.”

“What do you want me to say? I’m not exactly thrilled to have your balls slapping against my new camera.”

He smirks at the bite in your voice, “With the amount of times you’ve seen my sack, I figured you’d be used to that by now.” You roll your eyes and bite your tongue because he’s right and that wasn’t the best retort you could have given him.

You’ll admit, sometimes his attractiveness throws you off and that only pisses you off further.

“New camera, huh?” His eyes meet yours in the reflection, thick brows raising in amusement, “Honored to be the one to christen it. ‘Specially with Lexxie.” He whistles lowly, brown eyes flickering over to the cracked door of the bathroom, “She’s a sexy little thing, isn’t she?”

You ignore him again so you don’t get tongue tied by trying to outwit him, breathing out a sigh of relief when Steve and your boss reenter and the older man begins to throw out orders for everyone to follow.

“I want this to feel real. Aside from the close ups, I need some filthy, dirty talk. Sell it, make those horny bastards bust their load over the believable newlyweds.”

Lexxie is leaning against the doorway to the bathroom, a beautiful white lingerie set on her curvy body, obscured by a silk robe.

You’re both jealous of her for looking so goddamn pretty and jealous of Javier for having the pleasure of getting to fuck her.

“We’re not amateurs, Robbie.” 

Okay, so maybe Javier isn’t all that bad and you do tend to overreact sometimes.

It’s just hard not to, he has a penchant for getting under your skin like no other. Kind of like the annoying boys you used to go to high school with that would relentlessly tease you for being you.

No time to project your insecurities. You’re at work, you remind yourself, listening intently as your boss turns to you and begins to describe how he wants you to shoot the scene.

Intimate. Very. Intimate.

He yells action and the scene begins to play out naturally.

Lexxie stands by the window, her white silk robe loosely tied around her waist, revealing glimpses of her smooth, brown skin. The moonlight accentuates her curves, making her look like a vision of desire against the backdrop of the shimmering city.

Javier watches her from the bed, gaze dark with anticipation. He can’t take his eyes off her, the way the silk clings to her body, hinting at the treasures beneath.

She turns to him, a playful smile dancing on her lips, and slowly walks toward the bed, her hips swaying seductively with each step.

Steve holds the boom mic above them, out of the camera’s view, as you follow Lexxie’s movements with careful precision, zooming in on her long legs then panning up to her thick thighs.

As she reaches the bed, she unties the belt of her robe, letting it fall open. Javier licks his lips, the outline of his cock prominent against the fabric of his pants.

She climbs onto the bed, straddling his hips, her hands gliding over his chest.

“I’ve been waiting all day to get you alone.” Her voice is a sultry whisper as she traces her fingers along Javier’s jawline. “I can’t believe we’re finally here, just you and me.”

There’s a lopsided smile on his lips, large hands sliding around her waist, pulling her closer. “You look incredible, baby. Couldn’t take my eyes off you all night. My pretty wife.”

She leans in, her breath warm against his ear. “Tell me what you want. I want to hear you say it.” Her words are a teasing challenge, her teeth biting down on his earlobe.

He groans softly, hands roaming over her curves. “I want to touch you, taste you. Feel you shiver under my hands, hear you moan my name.” His voice drops to a near-growl. “I want to make you mine, over and over again.”

You’re on the bed with them, knees digging into the comforter as you hold the camera at eye level, the small screen that extends from it giving it that grain that makes it look even more erotic. 

All of this is beginning to feel too intimate but you block that out, even if it’s fucking hard to. This is what your boss wanted, anyways.

You feel your clit pulsing, heat pooling at your core as you watch them and it’s infuriating.

She smiles, a mischievous glint in her eyes as she kisses him deeply, her tongue dancing with his and you make sure to get a good shot of it. “Then take me. Show me why I married you.” She pulls back slightly, her gaze locked with his.

He pulls her closer, his lips capturing hers in another passionate and hungry kiss. They’re absolutely unbothered by your presence.

“I’m going to worship every inch of you.” His tone is thick with promise, bringing his hand up to wrap around her neck. “I want to hear you scream for me, break that little throat then soothe it with my cum.”

Your breath hitches at his words and for the life of you, you don’t understand why you’re being so affected by this.

While faint, he hears your reaction and you don’t miss the subtle smirk that tugs at those pink, pouty lips of his. 

“Yes. I want you. I need you. Fuck me like it’s our last night on earth.” Her words are a plea, filled with raw desire and feigning love.

A little corny, but what the hell, that’s half the appeal of these things anyway.

Their bodies press together, the heat between them palpable that you can feel it from where you are.

Her fingers tangled in Javi’s hair as she deepens the kiss, her body moving rhythmically against his.

The passion they exacerbate is undeniable, an electric charge that ropes you in as you move the camera closer, igniting your every nerve.

His skilled fingers move to pull down the cups of her bra, freeing her breasts and he uses his hold on her neck to tilt her back slightly, leaning down to wrap his lips around her stiff nipple. He suckles on it, drawing out a moan from the star on his lap as his wet tongue darts out to flick rapidly against the pebbled flesh.

He does the same to the other, you following his movements and your own nipples hardening, the friction of them rubbing up against your sports bra with each deep breath you take enough to gradually turn you on even more.

After lavishing her chest with his attention, leaving her tits glistening with a layer of his spit, he goes to kiss her again and they share more of that porny dialogue that usually makes you cringe.

But not today.

Not as you watch how they touch up on each other, the way he slowly releases his hold on her neck and she pushes the shirt off his shoulders then shimmies down his body, pulling his pants down and revealing his cock.

You’ve seen it dozens of times, it shouldn’t phase you (just as how he reminded you of earlier), but fuck— with the way you’re so heated right now by unofficially being part of this twosome, you can’t help how your mouth floods with saliva at the sight.

It’s got just the right amount of hair surrounding it, looking real heavy and swollen with arousal as she wraps her fingers around it.

You move down to get a good POV shot, bending at the waist and accidentally wagging your ass in his face. 

While Lexxie begins to blow him, showcasing her skill to the camera, Javier’s eyes are glued to your ass and how good it looks in the jean shorts you’re wearing.

You can feel it, his stare heavy as lead, as one of his hands comes down to make a makeshift ponytail of the woman’s curly hair while the other just barely grazes the back of your thighs.

If you weren’t so hyper aware of his touch, you would have missed it. Your hips involuntarily moving subtly and you play it off as you shuffling to get more comfortable to record the oral he’s currently receiving. 

Sounds of her gagging and his grunts fill the room. Steve’s brows are furrowed in concentration, picking up every single thing and you pray that he doesn’t hear how ragged your breathing has become.

You didn’t even notice it until the camera in your hand started shaking just a little.

So unprofessional, this shoot is gonna haunt you for weeks.

But Robbie doesn’t seem to mind, and you wonder if you’re the problem with how Steve and him seem to be so locked in while you’re sitting here, all hot and bothered, trying not to think of Javier despite seeing his spit slick cock slipping in and out of her mouth so filthily.

The director orders them to switch and you try not to be too hasty when you move off the bed, allowing the couple to do as they’re told.

You avoid Javier’s eyes, the ones looking for yours, as he settles in between Lexxie’s spread legs.

He comments on how wet she is, tongue darting out to lick his lips as he begins to kiss her over the lacy fabric of her fancy panties.

There’s an obvious wet spot from both her slick and his saliva. You alternate, panning the camera from his ministrations, up her gorgeous body, then to capture the look of pure fucking bliss on her face.

She squeezes her tits, moaning obscenely as he pulls her underwear to the side and begins to suck and lick at her pussy— wet sounds of his lips smacking against her folds and clit has your own cunt dripping and the rough fabric of your jean shorts rubbing against your underwear is just embarrassingly pleasurable. 

It’s like you can feel his tongue on you as it flicks over her flesh, her arousal coating his face and dampening his mustache.

Javier begins to finger her and the director urges you to get a closer shot of it, which you do and it has you so close to their intimacy; you can smell her pussy.

Your thighs clench.

She cums all over his fingers and he pulls back, traversing up her body slowly, his lips marking their path until he’s kissing her messily again before shoving those sinewy digits into her mouth, and she expertly cleans them off, not breaking eye contact with him.

You lick your lips, practically tasting her, and they’re directed to start off in missionary then end in doggy.

“Put her head on your lap, get a shot of her tits down with his torso in view. Lexxie, scream his name like it’s the best cock you’ve ever had inside you.”

“Won’t be hard to do. It is the best I’ve had.”

You roll your eyes at the smug smile that tugs at Javier’s lips at her words, that statement enough to calm you down as you shift into the optimal position, her head on your lap as Javier strokes his dick and rids her of her panties, leaving her with the cups of her bra still below her tits and the garter belt on her waist.

The white stockings brush up against his thighs as he hitches her legs up on his hips.

He begins to fuck her, each thrust sending her further up your body and you grip onto your camera as you zoom in on the way her body moves, her back arching and needy whimpers pushing past her plump, glossy lips.

Your eyes are glued to the small screen, his toned body looking like a sculpture and a thin sheen of sweat making him glow.

Yeah, this tape is going to fucking sell.

“Get over here and get a shot of her pretty pussy when I push her legs up.” Javier instructs you and you can’t help but drop your jaw at the audacity.

There’s an insult on the tip of your tongue, waiting to be lashed out but Robbie agrees and you fight the urge to fling the camera at him.

Javier senses your irritation and fucking smirks, but you pay it no mind (or at least try not to) as you move away from Lexxie, off the bed, and beside him.

He spreads her thighs and pushes her knees up to her chest, her pussy on full view as his cock continues to piston in and out of her.

It really is so hot. Usually, some stars would have to use lube to get the process going but not Javier. Never Javier. 

He eats pussy so messily and knows just how to treat his girls, they’re usually fucking drenched and dripping by the time he’s ready to fuck them. He doesn’t need anything artificial to help him out.

Lexxie is moaning and spitting out pure filth as he continues to fuck her, you’re doing a good job at capturing it all. 

Suddenly, Javi leans over to whisper into your ear.

“Bet you’d look just as pretty like this, nena.”

Your breath hitches in your throat, camera once more shaking slightly in your grasp and your skin warms. What the hell is his deal?

And why does the idea of being spread out like this for him suddenly so fucking enticing?

Your eyes flicker over to Steve, who both watched that little interaction happen and picked it up on his mic, an amused expression on his face.

You shoot him a look that basically translates to Don’t and he shakes his head lightly, holding back a snicker.

They’re directed to switch again, both stars getting closer to their orgasms, and you use this a chance to take a step back and fucking collect yourself. No doubt that your cunt is an absolute mess right now.

Maybe you’ll rub one out before going in tonight. That is if you have the time. Maybe if you’re not so tired after, you’ll pick up one of the men at the bar and use him to fuck Javier Peña out of your mind.

Now bent over, her ass and pussy are on full display. Javier, once more acting like he’s the goddamn director, moves aside so you can get a good shot of it. You do, bristling as he brushes against you whenever he gets back into position behind her, entering her pussy in one swift motion and beginning to fuck the shit out of her.

Jesus. Christ. It must be because of how fucking weird this shoot has been but man, is he giving it to her good.

A few delicious spanks are brought down to her ass, his large palm making the meaty flesh jiggle and he grunts loudly at how it feels against his dick.

There’s more dirty talk, him telling her how good this pussy feels and that it belongs to him now. Her doubling down and telling him that he’s the only cock she’s ever going to take.

You move below his spread legs, getting a good view of his heavy balls slapping against her clit, his precum and her arousal coating the flesh of his sack, the sound of it smacking against her is for sure going to make some poor soul release their spunk all over their keyboards or whatever it is that they’ll watch this on.

Getting more footage of their full bodies, you maneuver yourself all around the bed, knowing that when this sucker is edited together, it’s really going to feel like an intimate telling of a couple’s honeymoon night.

You’ll give it to Javi and Lexxie— they’re good at what they do.

She reaches her peak first, shouting that she’s coming and her body flails and tenses, squeezing his cock and gushing cum out of her hole.

You make the mistake of looking up at Javier, finding that he’s already staring at you and he growls, stilling inside her and filling her up with his load.

It’s like everything else melts and disappears, leaving just you two suspended in this moment. The way his brown eyes twinkle with something you can’t quite decipher has your entire body quivering and your heart beating wildly in your chest.

What the fuck is going on?

“Get the money shot!” Robbie barks at you, seeing that you’ve been lost in a fucking daze and you shake your head, snapping out of it and moving off the rose petal covered sheets, again moving next to Javier as he pulls out.

Lexxie positions herself sexily, and not long after does her pussy flutter and milky cum begins to seep out of it, an obscene squelching sound as it drips lazily onto her engorged clit then the mattress.

It’s so fucking hot, you’ll admit it. That’s the point of these things, isn’t it? To turn others on. You can’t blame yourself for the way its intended effect washes over you.

Except your mind is still hazy from how Javier had looked at you while coming inside of another woman.

The pornstar shakes her hips erotically, giggling as Javier smacks her ass.

“And cut. Great fucking job team. You guys just made me a whole lotta money.”

You quit recording, licking your lips and moving off the bed quickly, closing the camera and making a beeline to the other side of the room, not being shy about the way you snag up another travel sized bottle of Fireball and shoot it.

“Drinking on the job?” Javier tuts, walking over to you with his soft cock hanging between his legs and you do your best to not let your eyes drop down to it. He’s got an unlit cigarette hanging from between his lips. “Very unprofessional.”

Lexxie has disappeared off into the bathroom again to clean up, Steve and Robbie discussing who knows what.

“Yeah well.” You’re flustered and hate how you’re conveying it. He’s reveling in the sight of you. “I got thirsty.”

“Hmm,” he hums, gaze narrowing ever so slightly, “Camera like what it saw?”

You clench your jaw, turning from him to begin packing your stuff up. You don’t have time for this, for him. You need to leave and get ready for the bar.

“You heard Robbie— just made him a whole lotta money, so what do you think?”

“Let me rephrase that. Did you like what you saw? Like watching the way I fucked her but was thinking of you the whole time?”

You freeze, static in your brain like an interrupted television broadcast and your body feeling feverish. You need to get out of here.

“And you say I’m acting unprofessional.” You scoff, trying to act like you’re not affected by him and his stupid words and that dumb mustache and his fucking bare cock.

He snorts out a laugh, prepared to say something else to grate your nerves but you don’t give him a chance, slinging the strap of the camera bag over your shoulder and grabbing your purse, pushing past him.

“Alright, Robbie I’m out. I’ll swing by the office tomorrow and drop this off after I’ve reviewed the footage.”

You can see Javier from your peripheral, tight jeans up on his hips and moving out into the balcony to smoke.

You feel like you can breathe a little easier now.

“Sounds good. I’ll have your check for it then.”

You nod, saying bye to Steve who has a shit eating grin on his face. “You workin’ at Lucky’s tonight?”

“Yeah.”

“I’ll be there ‘round eleven for a beer… and to discuss whatever the fuck all that was.” He motions vaguely and you roll your eyes.

“I’d rather not.”

“S’too damn bad. I drink Michelobs, by the way.”

Your face scrunches up, “I shouldn’t let you in based on that alone.”

You can’t help the small smile that tugs at your lips at his reaction, but it’s all in good fun.

This little interaction is almost enough to make you forget about… all that. Almost. The door to the balcony slides open again and you take that as your cue to get the hell outta dodge.

“Alright, whatever, I’ll see you then. Hopefully we’re not too busy.”

You say goodbye to Lexxie over your shoulder, briskly walking down the hall to the elevator, looking forward to the cold shower you’re about to take to cool down your heated skin.

[rafesslxt]

𝐒𝐋𝐘𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐍 𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐒 | 𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐒𝐌𝐄𝐋𝐋

sfw headcanon | Enzo, Theodore, Mattheo, Draco

「 ✦ Headcanon about how their girlfriends would smell, what they would use + their reaction to it. ✦ 」

words: 1,2k

aesthetic: 🛁🧴🧖🏼‍♀️🧺🫧

Enzo:

coconut ☁️🥥🧴🌴🐚

haircare; coconut milk shampoo & conditioner by ogx

bodycare; coco cabana body wash and body cream by sol de janeiro

perfume/bodyspray; coco cabana body spray by sol de janeiro and coconut passion by Victorias Secret

It all began when you and the Slytherin Gang would chill in your common room late at night. Your sister had send you a package with some new products from the muggle world form a brand you really liked. You let yourself fall back into the couch where your boyfriend Enzo pulled you between his legs, so your back was against his chest. Not even a minute after he smelled your hair and his eyes widened as if he just pulled a line of coke he asked, "Baby, what is it that your hair smells so good?" He starts sniffing your hair like a dog and you giggle, your cheeks blushing. "My sister sent this to me the other day. A few products from the muggle world that I wanted to try. It's the brand I told you about a few days ago." He tried to listen to you but was totally consumed by the new smell. "Here, smell this." you grin and hold your arm in front of his nose. "What is– oh god damn.." The smell of coconut made it's way through his nose right to his brain. "It's a new body lotion and two body spray's I mixed so–" But before you could finish your sentence he pulled you with him up from the couch and pushed you towards his dorm. "Uhu you can tell me all about it once I'm ready with you."

Theodore:

pistachio & salted caramel 🍂🌞🍯🌰🧸

bodycare: body lotion and wash nr. 62 by sol de janeiro

lips: salted caramel lip balm by rhode skin

perfume/bodyspray: bodyspray nr. 62 by sol de janeiro or Casablanca Swiss Arabian perfume

His obsession with your smell started when you came back from your summer holiday's with your parents in the muggle world. You showed him what you brought back there, doing a little haul in front of him and your friends. They knew how much you loved to show the your new things every time you got back so they sat there and listened to your happy voice. "Oh and I almost forgot! I got these new things from a brand called 'sol de Janeiro' it's supposed to smell like pistachio and salted caramel. It's smells delicious really." You handed the items around and your friends smelled on the lotions and sprays. They all told you how good and yummy it smelled, smiling at the scent. When they finally passed it to your boyfriend, he took a smell and his eyes widened immediately. "Oh Mia cara this smells— oh dio aiutami." He pulled you closer to him and sprayed the bodyspray on your skin, waiting a few seconds before it dry's and he pulls your arm in front of his nose. "Oh principessa, this smells even more devine on your skin." "I'm glad you like it, Teddy." you smile at him and giggle. He puts more on you, on your bare legs, your arms, your chest and neck. "Baby we need to go." he suddenly urges and try's to pull you away from your friends who look knowingly at your boyfriend. He leans down to your ear and whispers into it, "It turns me on so fucking much sweetheart. And If you don't come with me right now I'm gonna take you over this couch."

Mattheo:

vanilla 🍦☁️🧁🧸🍨

bodycare: vanilla shea butter body wash and body lotion by dove

lips: laneige vanilla sleeping mask

perfume/bodyspray: Vanilla 28 perfume by kayali and Vanilla bodyspray by Victorias Secret

Mattheo really tried his best to be a good shopping partner but after the hundreth shop you walked through, he barely could comprehend anything you said. "Oh look a drugstore! I need a few new things. I wanna change my scent." His eyebrows shot up. "New scent? In like, new perfume?" You nodded your head and walked inside, your eyes already on a few products. "Yes and also my showering routine has to change so the smell matched the perfume." he looked at you in confusion. What do you mean your shower routine has to change? Just shower, right? "Hmm I'm thinking since it's getting a bit colder I'm gonna go for something less fruity." You browse through the shelves of the store until you find something to fill your basket. "And?" he asked lazily, looking at the new items. "Vanilla." you proudly smile at him, taking one of the bottles and opening the cap. "Here, smell it." You hold it in front of his nose and he takes a little sniff, his face soon changing into utterly confusion. "Wait–" he mumbles when you're about to pull the bottle away. He takes it out of your hand and smells it again, then the rest in your basket. "Oh baby, If you're gonna smell like this I'm eating you up as soon as you leave the shower." he smirks at you. You roll your eyes but can't help the giggle that leaves your mouth. "What are you doing?" you question your boyfriend when he starts walking through the store on his own. "Finding more of this vanilla stuff!"

Draco:

fruity 🍊🍋🌞✨🍹

haircare: mehr shampoo and conditioner by rituals

bodycare: mehr body scrub, shower foam and dry oil by rituals

perfume/bodyspray: body mist mehr by rituals or orange soleia by guerlain

Draco couldn't understand what got you so obsessed with muggle things until you showed him your newest treasure. "So you've been in this dirty muggle world to buy what? Showergel?"he mocks you a bit when he sees all of your new stuff spread around you on the bed. You roll your eyes at him and scoff. "Oh don't be so grumpy Dray, this smells really good. You'll love it." He sighs and sits down at the edge of your bed, his eyes scanning all of the products. "Looks pretty.." he admits in a quiet mumble but you still heard it. "I know! It's on the more luxury side and like a whole new brand! It's supposed to smell like orange and sandalwood." "Sandalwood? You wanna smell like a forest?" "Dracooo stop mocking me, please. Try it and tell me how you like it, seriously." You pull off the cap of your new bodyspray and spritz it on your wrist, holding it in front of his nose. You studied his face to see a reaction, but nothing. "Draco? Don't you like it? I chose something fruity because I know you li–" but before you could finish your sentence, you were pulled up from your bed. "Dray, what are you doing?" "We're gonna take a shower, right now." "Oh so you like the stuff from 'the dirty muggle world', huh?" Now you were the one who mocked him and made him roll his eyes but in his opinion it was worth it. "Yeah yeah, we'll see who's gonna laugh when I am ready with you, darling." And just like that your smile dropped to your panties.

sooo this is something different let me know If you liked it ☁️✨

also got inspired by a post from @ahqkas and how Theodore would love your vanilla scent. 🍦

+ i swear the rituals of mehr is SO freaking good! I worked at a rituals shop and it‘s so worth it 🍊

taglist: @justarandomcanadiantransdude @helendeath @thatonepansexual2000 @imabee-oralizard @supernaturaldawning @brodiedoesthings @yourenogoodforme @sofa-couch26 @little-miss-naill @kolsangel @itsarajr @mixvchelle @hisparentsgallerryy @littlemadamred @ummmmmmm-username @jeannie-beannie @belle-blue @sagetakami @simp-for-fantasy @i-like-pandas5 @your-local-simp26 @romantasyreader28 @whiteboylover222 @batsching @themissingweasley26 [if you wanna be added or removed to my taglist, click here]

xoxo sarah <3

[ghostssweetgirl]

Hello, I hope you are well. 141 men+Konig and Roach.Alex. How do they react when they accidentally see female reader in the city for the first time? And just like that. The reader is shopping at a grocery store. And men do not know her. because they never saw the reader's face. but the reader recognizes them because she has seen their faces before and the reader says. What's up? (name) I'll send you a photo of the reader's gaze. so the reader works on the same team as them but right now it's a free day

Have a nice day :)

Hey there! I really like this request <3

TF141 + König + Roach + Alex Reacting to Seeing the Reader's Face (in public)

warnings: cursing, other than that, none. they think you're pretty 😍

Simon 'Ghost' Riley

Simon happened to be shopping in your town. No, he didn't do it on purpose. It was just on his way home.

You were shopping as well. You lived in a big city, so it wasn't unusual for you to be unmasked when doing your business. No one here knew you. You were on the pet food aisle, glancing over the ingredients of a specific brand until you suddenly felt a familiar presence walking by along the outside of the aisle. You look to your side and... spot Ghost.

Why was he here? Not like, why was he shopping, but why would he come to your city? It was too many people for his liking.

You watch him walk by, he doesn't give you a second glance as he goes about his business.

You set the bag of food down as you abandon your cart, walking fast to catch up to him. "Ghost!"

He heard a familiar voice call behind him, but as he turned around, he didn't know who he was looking at and how they knew his callsign. "What's up?" you asked, tilting your head at him. He stopped in his tracks, looking you up and down. "Bloody hell are you?"

You nervously laughed. "Y/N...?"

He was in disbelief. Wow, you were quite beautiful. He didn't think you'd be ugly, but my goodness, he was swept off his feet. "Fuckin' hell, kid," he rasped, chuckling nervously, you could tell.

"Sorry, I forgot you've never seen my face."

"Forgot to warn me you were quite stunning, too, darlin'."

Johnny 'Soap' MacTavish

He heard about this big grocery store from a friend, deciding to check it out. It was also the one you were at, trying to find some new clothes.

In your own little world, you weren't paying attention to the fact you were absent-mindedly taking over the aisle as you were folding a shirt back up.

"Excuse me," a voice called from behind you.

"Sorry," you muttered, moving out of the way. The man gave you a polite smile, and as you made eye contact, your pupils dilated, recognizing your teammate, Soap. "What's up?" you asked.

"Oh, jus' shoppin', nothin' much." You looked into his cart, curious. Some beer, socks, small food items. Also hygiene products. He watched you nose into what he's buying, wondering who the hell this random (pretty) lady is.

You stifle a laugh, looking at the soap in his cart. "Soap." He shook his head, softly chuckling. "Wha's so funny about that?"

You teased him. "Soap! For Soap... Come on, do you not get it?"

For a minute, he recognized the voice but couldn't put two and two together. Wondered if you were who he thought you were.

After awkward staring, you throw your arms up playfully. "Soap! You must not... recognize me...?" "Y/N...?" you continued.

He just figured it out, the way you emphasized his name. "Y/N... Shite, yer... beautiful," he muttered. "Didn't think I'd ever see your face, lass."

Captain 'John' Price

He was just leaving, checking out with his cart full of his selected items. Damn this long line, he'd be here a while.

You were walking in with an empty cart, eyes glued to the front of you. Wanting to get in, and get out. You take notice of the long line. Sighing in annoyance, you go about your business.

You make your way up to the front, expecting the line to have made progress. Nope, still long. Some person had 3 full carts, and was giving one of the cashiers a hard time. Not to mention it was one of the rush hours of business. You look around to see a bunch of grumpy, tired faces. It was all just regular people, until you saw your captain. You smiled, hesitant to say hi to him, not wanting to be a bother.

"Hey, Captain Price!" you sang. He fixed his gaze onto you precisely, questionably. "What's up?"

He met you halfway in between the queues. "How in the bloody hell do you know who I am?" his voice was low.

"Because... I'm in the task force, silly," you laughed. "Y/N."

"Oh," he said plainly, his body visibly relieved. "Well, kid. Near freaked me out, some pretty lady knowin' my rank."

"Sorry," you blushed. "I'll leave you be, then? See you at work."

"Nice to see ya, y/n," his bright blue eyes beamed as they crinkled from his wide smile.

You were nearly finished up shopping, when you walked next to Gaz.

You didn't notice him at first, but when you did, he smiled at you with a polite nod as if you were a stranger.

You smiled back. "What's up, Garrick?"

He squinted his eyes at you, wondering how he knew you.

"I'm sorry, remind me of who you are?"

"Y/N, silly," you quipped.

"Oh," he sighed, looking over the features of your face. "Nice seein' you without the mask."

You almost blush, reaching up to soothe your unmasked face. "Thanks. Definitely didn't expect to see you... here."

"It was just on my way."

"Yeah, well, I hope you're enjoying your time off," you smiled.

"You, too, y/n," he smiled back, walking off but making sure to get one last look at you before you walked off, memorizing your face.

König

It's been such a long day already, and here you were stuck at a busy grocery store in your city. You usually stopped by here every so often, but didn't think the store would be busy when you came here today.

You were pretty much just looking at useless stuff at this point, to pass time by as the queues were not moving. You sigh as you grew tired of looking at this nonsense. Seeing some queues move, you finally hopped in one. You were in a hurry, and that was obvious, but so was someone else.

You almost bumped carts with this man, and before you go to apologize, you hear his thick German accent being the first one to apologize profusely. "I... am so sorry! You go ahead, ma'am," he muttered.

"König! I am so sorry!" you giggled. "I was in a hurry, I didn't see you there! What's up?" He stuttered, hands nearly shaking at you knowing his name. "I... was just shopping here."

"Are... you okay?"

"Ja... yes, I just... sorry, I don't think I know you..."

"Y/N! I don't have my mask on..." you rubbed your cheek. "Sorry to confuse you."

He was taken aback by how beautiful you were. He was already an anxious man, finally being able to put a voice to a very pretty face felt quite nice, but finding out just how gorgeous you were was making his heart slam against his ribcage.

"I-sorry," you could hear his nervousness, it was admittedly very cute. "You are very pretty, Maus."

Roach

You had gone to the store to get some alcohol, it was one of your days off and you wanted to enjoy yourself.

You went to the aisle, and started browsing.

You grabbed a few bottles of wine, and an extra bottle of liquor for another day and started walking out of the aisle to leave.

Until someone came around the corner.

You smiled as you spotted your teammate, Roach.

"Roach! Hey, what's up?"

He made eye contact with you, and you could tell he was confused.

"Sorry, do I know you?"

"It's Y/N! Sorry, don't have my mask on," you apologized, blushing.

"Oh. I was wondering how some beautiful woman knew me," he laughed. "It's nice to see you."

"Thanks, Roach," you smirked. You bid your goodbyes as you walked off, not seeing him look back at you once more.

You were stumped on a product, deciding if you should buy it. You started looking around for products that seemed popular, and went with the correct brand.

You were on your way to the front, when you spotted someone you knew. Alex. He was either in a hurry, or just wanted to get to where he was going, but you followed him.

You about lost him, but finally caught up.

"Alex! Hey!"

He looked around at a few people before he looked at you.

"What's up?" you smiled at him.

He stammered his words. "Hi. Who're you? How do I know you?"

You laughed as you playfully rolled your eyes. "Y/N."

"Damn, nice to see your face, lil lady," he chuckled, eyes wide at your beauty.

"Aw, thanks," you replied. "Enjoying your time off?"

"You know it." You both did some small talk before you had to make your way out. You waved goodbye at him, and he returned it with a polite smile, watching you as you walked away.

"Damn, she's beautiful," he whispered under his breath.

--

A/N - Hope this was good! I've never written for Roach or Alex, so I don't know if I wrote them out well, but thank you for this request and sorry it took a while to get finished! <3

[jovenshires]

endless au edits: smosh theatre's seasonal lineup (3/4)

no matter what else you have to say about it, one thing is certain. smosh's summer show is a fascinating choice: a production of godspell directed by zoe moacanin. smosh fans may know moacanin from directing last year's infamous performance of les miserables, which was the first show in almost a decade to star both smosh founders, ian hecox and anthony padilla. in a P.I.T. interview with hecox, he revealed that les miserables was moacanin's "brainchild." from the beautiful, minimalistic set to the haunting, romantic stage direction, hecox credited it all as her idea. "the show would not have gone on without her," hecox said. "she's one of the greatest directors i've ever worked with." moacanin's understanding of tragedy and theatre itself truly make her a force to be reckoned with. with a standout crew to support her, including arguably smosh's most talented stage head alex tran, i think we can all preemptively agree that this religious comedy-drama will lean far into the latter and leave not a dry eye in the house. it will surprise almost no one that shayne topp is staying atop the heap of most leading roles in smosh productions as he takes on the intimidating role of jesus christ himself. jesus is a high-energy, charismatic, strong leader that others instinctively follow - all words that accurately describe topp. when i reached out to him to set up a potential interview (coming soon), he had this to say: "it's truly such an honor to be working with zoe [moacanin]. she's extremely talented, and this cast has really captured my heart. i'm so excited to put on this show." i'll have the pleasure of sitting down with topp next week to dive further into his character and his relationship with the cast. speaking of, his fellow lead actor is none other than chanse mccrary, who will be playing john the baptist/judas. mccrary is known for speaking out about how his sexuality and race affect his career, both in how he's perceived by others and how it informs his art. to see him play such a double-edged character will be fascinating, as he will act as jesus's confidante as well as his downfall. smosh theatre is often highly praised for giving their actors room for interpretation. mccrary has taken that and run with it in the past, and i have no doubt that he'll do that again. mccrary shared on his instagram that he's "excited" for the upcoming performance. "i've had so much fun working on this show; this is truly one of my dream roles. come see me and @ shaynetopp sing all for the best and maybe kiss, who's to say". well, he certainly has me sold. godspell is a unique show in that theatre companies often name all of the characters after their actors. smosh is following that unwritten rule, releasing the rest of the cast solely as the songs they sing rather than the characters' names. the incredibly talented arasha lalani will be singing "turn back o' man," performed by the mary magdalene-esque character. lalani has played mostly high-strung, comedic roles with smosh thus far, and she's damn good at it. but as she showcased as cosette in the aforementioned production of les miserables, she absolutely has the range. backing her up in the ensemble of apostles are relatively up-and-coming actors marcus munguia (singing "light of the world" as the comedic, up-beat, class clown apostle) and peter ditzler (singing "all good gifts", a character notably sweet and innocent yet slightly slow on the uptake) among others. the stark mix of both classic smosh members and newer actors makes for a perfectly balanced cast, one that will make this old show feel brand new.

[lithominium]

Ughhh hahah im ahving a “nobody under 40 really expects anything good to happen ever again” moment right now going “climate change has completely ruined seasons as we know them, not the hundreds of thousands of deaths caused by sea level rise and (un)natural disasters caused by global warming” and “every single product in the entire world is designed to break down in a year at the most and every year it gets worse, including housing”

Its not like yoi can go buy a good that actually functions, because All goods are like this. Tools are godawful now. You buy a brand new sandblaster from a reputable company and it literally sucks shit. You buy a modern reissue of music equipment and its shoddily built and doesnt work right or something. Houses being built in the modern era are thrown up in a week and collapse with people inside a week later. Video games come out and are half baked and dont change when people ask

The consumers dont have power anymore, they havent for Years.

Every time i look at politics (USA because im unfortunately usamerican, but ive seen some godawful shit in other countries too) i go “well he cant nearly be as bad as the last guy” but somehow they always one up each other for being more genocidal and more awful. On both ends of the spectrum. It used to be 3 years ago “do i wanna vote for the awful person or the awful person who actively wants to kill me” but now its literally just. “Person who wants to kill me or person who wants to kill me.” And every single worthless politician in existence is doing the same thing. If i voted for someone who didnt want to kill me, so few people would end up voting for them, that the people who DO want to kill me would win anyways. My old college town banned public homosexuality. Tennessee of course. Worthless ass state.

I dont doomscroll, i know how ungodly unhealthy it is to scroll through tags showing off how bad everything is. But its inescapable. I go to funny youtube videos and see wade dankpods complaining about how all tools suck while he tries to rebuild a car. I scroll through my dashboard which is supposed to be memes and fandom content and its “this us democrat just said ‘yaknow i really think its great that israel is finally killing all those subhuman palistinians” and what the hell am i supposed to do about that??

I just need. Some semblance of hope. Anything just to tell me it will be alright. Tell me theres a reason for me to not steal a plane and fly it into a god damn mountain so my final moments will be doing the one thing i really love.

[fratboykate]

Papi, you can't leave us in exciting times like these! Thoughts on Hailee's new boyfriend?

what ill say is this: actions > words. believe people when they show you who they are. stop pretending you know celebrities when all youve gotten from them is the veryyyyyyy curated personas they put out into the world. a person can act as sweet as pie for the cameras but you can't possibly believe they're decent on the most basic level when they date someone who is an open and proud orange cheeto supporter and who has said some real fucking gross shit over the years.

you also can't believe a singer that tells you she's a "feminist queer ally" but then only uses her enormous platform to do petty shit like come after writers on a show who made a joke she didn't like yet never says a single damn word about queer people/women being literally persecuted now then adds insult to injury by turning around and dating one of the most disgusting dudes in the industry.

ive been telling y'all for YEARS that you have to stop letting parasocial relationships trick you into believing you know any of these celebrities no matter how many of their interviews you watch or social media captions you read. for the vast fucking majority of celebs, what they offer the world is just as much them playing a character as they would do on set. youre consuming a product, a brand, an identity. its all manufactured. it's all a performance. how you haven't caught onto this yet is baffling to me. you'd be shocked by how different most of your faves are behind the scenes. they've all just been media trained and know better than to tell you. some of them are smart enough to not open their mouths and show their true colors but simultaneously dumb enough to become friends/date people who are not as savvy as them because you ultimately will always end up surrounding yourself with others who are like you. at that point the charade crumbles. but y'all would rather turn a blind eye than, at the very least, admit your faves aren't as good a person as you thought they were.

[sing-you-fools]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you! get to know your mutuals and followers (ू•‧̫•ू⑅)♡

okay i'll be weirdly specific

-my 6yo has recently decided she's Brian May's biggest fan so i get to listen to lots of Queen instead of just. all Disney all the time. every song she's like "does this one have good guitar?" and i'm like yes of course it's still Brian May and she's like YESSSSSSSS and it's really cute (also she has wanted to be both a rock star and a scientist for a super long time so he's basically her idol)

-sitting down to write with a warm beverage and a candle after everyone else has gone to bed so i can make all the weird facial expressions i need to as i try to figure out how to describe them (bonus: getting a little baked first, though then i run the risk of just daydreaming cute fluffy scenes that are completely irrelevant to the plot and i don't intend to write instead of getting anything productive done)

-seeing people's eyes light up when i tell them their (shirt/hair/whatever) is really cool. alternatively, seeing the look of fear in their eye when i tell them their outfit's cool, and they look at my outfit, and clearly think: if this clown school dropout thinks this outfit is cool i should probably never wear it again. either way, love it

-my lip balm! not to be an advertisement but i've had chapped cracking bleeding painful lips all my life, nothing i do would help them, but i finally found a lip balm that as long as i'm adequately hydrated, my lips stay nice and soft with literally one application per day. it seems like a little thing but omg it's just such a simple quality of life improvement. like finally finding the right medication to treat something you've dealt with forever. (in case anyone's in the same boat, it's called la la lips, pricey but damn it works)

-picking up a book i loved but haven't read in a while and don't remember well for a reread. it's not exactly like reading it for the first time again of course, but i feel like it's the closest i can come to picking up brand new book and knowing both that it's absolutely the sort of thing i'll love AND that it's what i'm in the mood for (other than picking up a Discworld i haven't read yet but i'm running really low on those)

(and i'll be honest i'm unlikely to send this along because of who i am as a person but it was fun!)

[nickgerlich]

How To Get A Date

It often seems like our discussion topics lean more toward negativity than positivity. Sure, there are plenty of good business decisions, product launches, and all that. But the volume of bad things happening sticks out in my mind like a sore thumb.

Yeah, we can—and should—learn from both the good and the bad. It’s just that I would rather there be far more positive items, like the news I saw yesterday that household appliance maker Whirlpool is helping singles clean up their dating app profiles.

Wait. Whaaaat?

Whirlpool has hopped on to social media and instructed singles to replace their profile pics of them flexing in the gym, to snaps of them folding laundry and doing dishes. You might be thinking that this is the silliest campaign ever launched, but when you consider that Whirlpool is known for its kitchen and laundry appliances, it makes perfect sense.

Forget about being a gym rat or climber of tall mountain peaks. You’re going to get a lot more favorable swipes and DMs if you go for the homeboy look. Trade your Indiana Jonesing for Domesticated Man.

And Whirlpool is pretty sure of itself, having conducted a simple non-random pilot study with seven bachelors over a three-week period. They swapped their he-man pics for ones showing them doing household chores, and noted they averaged 79% more DMs and 46% more matches. Just be careful taking that selfie while you’re washing the dishes. You wouldn’t want to drop your phone in the dish water.

Other research by the brand showed that 94% of respondents (presumably both females and males) indicated that household chore equity is important among singles who want a relationship, with 91% also revealing that the ability to do household chores was a top priority. In other words—I’m talking mostly to the guys here, because the gals often get stuck with these duties—don’t plan on lying on the sofa while your SO works her butt off, or, worse yet, golfing with the guys while she labors all day long Saturday and Sunday.

It won’t end well.

While this is far from a scientific study, we must remember this is really just a clever ad campaign, and a damn good one at that. "Oh, and while we’re convincing you on the merits of doing chores, can we interest you in a new washer, dryer, and dishwasher?” It comes at a time when the brand concedes sales will be soft this year, thanks to overall inflation, continuing high interest rates, and ridiculously high housing prices. I give them credit for trying to overcome this hurdle.

Other findings showed that 90% of dating app users examine profile pics to help judge whether a person takes care of themselves, and about two-thirds would rather view a seemingly mundane pic of their dating candidate cooking a meal or other similar “drudgery.” Your flexing is just plain boring.

Were I in the market for companionship, I could easily post pics of me cooking, since it is something I love to do. And while I most definitely partake of laundering and cleaning, I don’t do those with the same joy as I do in preparing meals. Of course, I could always smile and pretend.

I just wish I knew this 45 or more years ago, because we didn’t have dating apps back then. I remember arriving on my undergrad campus in Fall 1977, and quickly signing up for what was a newfangled thing: computer dating. We answered a survey, filling in little rectangles on a punch card, which were then read by a rather crude scanner and the data input to a massive mainframe computer that filled an entire room. My three matches were far from promising, and I immediately gave up on the premise.

Man, if only I had attached a picture of me faking it in the kitchen. Maybe I would have done better.And I say faking it in all honesty, because I grew up in an era in which males were truly off the hook on all those things. It was just the norm. Mom cooked, cleaned, and laundered. Dad changed oil and pushed the lawn mower. And my brother and I wondered when dinner would be ready. In retrospect, that sucked, and I was woefully unprepared for adult life, much less divorced adult life many years later.

Thankfully, I figured it out. Oldest Daughter and I taught ourselves how to cook, and now we both are adventurous in the kitchen. But it was only after some terrible “Hamburger Helper Without The Hamburger” dinners for a while.

Some of the best skills I have learned, albeit later in life, is the fine art of taking care of myself. I find serenity in doing the dishes, and folding the laundry. Cooking is a spiritual occasion, because I view eating as feeding the temple of me, as well as anyone else with whom I am sharing the table. The preparation is just as sacred as the consuming, and when I learned this, I finally understood the mystery of the Catholic Mass when Holy Communion is prepared.

Kudos to Whirlpool for a helluva fine campaign. This is brilliant, even if lighthearted and smile-worthy. But that’s exactly the intended effect. “Think about our brand for a second or two, and leave with a smile.”

You can’t ask for more than that. I’m positive.

Dr “And I Love Shopping For Groceries Too” Gerlich

Audio Blog

[samanthalucas]

How to grow your Teacup business online

How to grow your Teacup business online? That's a damn good question. We live in a day and age where tea is hotter than ever, and it has been for the past couple of decades, but still, growing an industry takes time, money, and effort; luckily, the internet can make that easier. If you are one of these people trying to figure out how to grow your business online, you have probably come across many different methods that range from expensive to free. In today's post, we're going over ways to grow your business online using custom rigid boxes for Packaging.

Advertising Is Not A Luxury - It Is A Necessity

There are a lot of things to consider when it comes to advertising your tea business online. It can be challenging to know where to start, but once you've got a few good ideas in mind, it's pretty easy to get the ball rolling.

If you're starting, there are a few things you should keep in mind when advertising your tea business online. First, advertising is not a luxury; it is a necessity. Without advertising, how will anyone know that you exist? How will they know what kind of tea you sell? How will they understand why they should come into your shop instead of buying their tea online?

Second of all, remember social media! Social media is one of the best ways to learn about new businesses, especially if those businesses are local ones like yours. Make sure that all of your social media accounts have links to your website so that people can find out more about what you offer at any time of day or night (or even during their lunch break).

Thirdly: make sure that everything looks fantastic! The internet is full of distractions—don't let yours stand out from the crowd by having an ugly website or profile picture on Facebook!

You Need To Tell The World About Your Business

Tell the world about it if you want to grow your Teacup business online.

It would help if you created an online presence for your business by creating a website and social media accounts. You can then promote these sites through search engine optimization (SEO) techniques such as keyword research, backlinks, and content creation.

Once you have created a website and social media accounts, you should start writing blog posts related to tea cups or tea. These posts should be informative but also entertaining or funny to attract readers who click through to your website or social media page, where they can learn more about your products or services.

Your Competitors Are Telling The World About Their Businesses

They're posting about how they do things and why they do them. They're sharing their expertise, and they're making themselves look good.

Your competitors are talking about their businesses, and you should too! People are looking for information about your business, so it makes sense to help them. To grow your Teacup business online, you must start blogging about your products and services at least once a week. You can also include links to other places where people can learn more about your business—like websites or social media accounts.

By blogging regularly, you'll build up an audience of potential customers who will see your content whenever they search for information on tea cups or accessories. If someone is interested in buying a new tea cup but needs to know where to start looking? They'll probably search for "tea cup reviews" or "best teacup brands" in Google! When that happens, yours could be the first website they visit—and there's nothing better than getting an interested customer before anyone else does!

Advertising Is Not Only About Selling. It Is Equally Essential For Building A Brand

Advertising is one of the essential strategies to build brand awareness, increase sales and generate leads. But it has become extremely challenging to attract customers through traditional advertising methods like TV, radio, and print ads which are very expensive. So what's next? The answer lies in digital marketing.

With digital marketing, you can reach a large audience at an affordable cost without spending too much on media or print advertisements. Digital marketing is an effective way to target specific audience segments with highly customized messages at scale by using various digital channels such as search engines, social media platforms, mobile apps, etc.

Digital marketing offers many benefits over traditional marketing methods, such as direct mail or television commercials that are expensive to produce and distribute.

Embrace The Power Of Packaging with Custom Rigid Boxes

Packaging is integral to any product's journey from manufacture to the customer. It's how you get your products from A to B, and it's also how you tell your story and show off your brand.

When you're selling online, Packaging is especially important: because most shoppers need to get a chance to hold or see your products in person before buying them, Packaging is often the first thing they see. It's an opportunity for you to make a great first impression that will set the tone for their experience with your brand.

How do you make sure that the first impression is a good one? By embracing the power of custom rigid boxes!

Custom rigid boxes are an excellent way to ensure you're doing everything. They're made from sturdy materials, so they'll protect your goods during shipping and handling. And they can be customized to fit any size or shape of the product, so you don't have to worry about having inventory left over after the holiday season ends. Plus, they're easy for customers to open and re-close without damaging anything inside.

Influencer Marketing

If you want to grow your tea cup business, then influencer marketing is one of the best ways.

Influencer marketing is when you get influential people to promote your product. You don't have to pay them, but they will help you spread awareness about your product through their social media channels or other platforms where they have influence.

For example, if someone with many followers on Instagram posts a picture of themselves drinking out of a mug with a quote saying, "I love tea!" then people who see that post might be interested in buying cups with similar quotes themselves.

If you want to grow your Teacup business online, then influencer marketing can be an effective way to do it because it's free!

Email Campaigns

Email campaigns are a great way to grow your tea cup business online. Email campaigns allow you to target your audience with relevant, timely, and personalized content, which can help you increase sales and customer loyalty.

There are two main types of email campaigns:

Automated email marketing

This is where the emails are automatically sent from your website when a user visits. For example, if someone visits your site and adds an item to their basket, an automated email might ask them if they want to subscribe to your mailing list or receive special offers by email.

Personalized message

Personalized messages are manually sent from you to customers based on their previous behavior on your website or via other platforms such as social media channels like Facebook or Twitter. They can include product recommendations based on past purchases and special offers based on customer preferences (e.g., customers who purchased this product also bought this other product).

Referral Marketing

Referral marketing is a great way to build your tea business online. You can use it to get more customers, increase sales and improve your brand awareness.

Choose a referral program that works best for you and your customers. For example, if you sell teas through Amazon, you may want to offer an Amazon gift card as a reward. If you sell wholesale teas, offer free shipping on future purchases.

Offer incentives for referrals such as discounts or cash back. Make it easy for them to refer friends by offering a link or button on your website that they can send directly to their friends via email or social media.

Final Words

If you want to grow your Teacup business online, knowing your options and how to choose the best one for you and your business is essential. Fortunately, there are plenty of viable options available that can help you grow in this specific area. Choose one, get started, and watch your business reap the benefits. With the right tools and tactics, I'm confident that any entrepreneur can succeed at taking their business online.

[spectaculardistractions]

To José Rubia Barcia Mexico City, 6 February 1947 Dear Barcia, Your letter arrived a few days ago and I had to wait a few more to reply, because I was overwhelmed with work. I’m now at leisure to do so as shooting finished on the 1st of this month. I was getting a bit fed up of that damned Tampico and heaved a sigh of relief after shooting the final scene. In fact, I left the studio with a raging fever and was in bed for three days with the onset of pneumonia. Even today, finally out of bed, I still have stabbing pains in my right side. I won’t say much about the film, as you’re already familiar with its fairly mediocre story. I made a few good changes, including a suggestion of yours to do with them not escaping en masse from the prison, etc. It certainly won’t put me up there with the greats of Mexican cinema, white or Indian, but it has put me on the map as a commercial director. I finished it, although not without great effort and squandered energy, in the thirty-four days they gave me to complete it, managing to stay under budget at the same time. I’ve had offers to do other films, particularly with Negrete, who has become fond of me, but for the moment I’m cutting loose and heading off alone to France towards the end of the month at the latest. I’m taking advantage of a free tourist flight that will get me there directly. The main purpose of this trip is to take up my brand-new position as Secretary of the Film Archive and to assess the situation in France for myself. I fear it’s not a particularly happy one where cinema is concerned, and I’ve been told that even what I would earn at Cine France and at the archive wouldn’t be enough to put stale bread on the table. I feel duty-bound to make the trip though. I’ll probably be back in Mexico by the end of March. The crisis over here continues with little sign of resolution any time soon. This is not to say though, that all production has stopped. I would say you should come over here at once to stake your claim and wait it out a few months, but I know this would be impossible for a number of understandable reasons. You should wait until I get back and then you could come out at once with your tickets paid. I promise to get you on board as a writer and, for filming, as a dialogue ‘arranger’. Our glorious trades union allows no mention of the actual director to prevent a shadow being cast over their wonderful members. But, of course, my title doesn’t really matter. As for your script for Don Álvaro, now I know how things work over here I think the only way is to get Armando Calvo to read it. If you want me to, I could arrange an introduction and give him the script. I don’t think there are any other suitable actors. Negrete is out of the question, and the Baledones etc., monstrous. I see you are as ill-informed as ever about dubbing at MGM. I’ve heard no news that they are planning to come down here and Demetrio, who wrote a few days ago acknowledging payment of my debt, made not the slightest mention of a relocation. I see Godoy’s little birds are still spreading rumours. The general impression among the refugees over here is that there is no sign the situation in Spain is going to improve any time soon. I shall attempt to make it to the Motherland next month under the auspices of the International Film Federation. It seems highly likely I’ll be able to spend two weeks there, which would be wonderful. In any case, and if that falls through, I shall go to Biarritz to spend a week with my mother. As far as I’m concerned, you may do whatever you like with our unfortunate story. Send our very best greetings to Evita’s parents. We often reminisce about our splendid banquets and conversations; I always remember Eva with a gastronomical tear and in the warm glow of friendship. Please extend our greetings to the rest of the family of course, Our warmest regards to you and Evita, Buñuel Elba 9F PS Let me know if I can do anything else for you. You can count on me from 1 April, of course, when I’ll be back over here again. I’m leaving my family in Mexico, to Jeanne’s great despair. I won’t take them to France unless I can do it with $10,000 earned over here, or a guarantee I’ll be paid enough over there to live comfortably. The same day I wrote this letter I took to my bed with a glorious lung infection. To top it all, I was still convalescing from the first illness I gave myself after a bout of overeating and have now broken out in the most terrible rash. Forgive the delay in sending this unfortunate letter.

Jo Evans & Breixo Viejo, Luis Buñuel: A Life in Letters

[icinch]

The 3 Copywriting Lies You Need to Know

New Post has been published on https://www.cinchhomebiz.com/the-3-copywriting-lies-you-need-to-know/

The 3 Copywriting Lies You Need to Know

These are without a doubt the biggest mistakes new marketers tend to make when it comes to copywriting…

Lie #1: Good copywriting uses lots of exclamation points and over-the-top jargon a 5 year old wouldn’t believe.

“This Brand New Revolutionary Never Before Seen Blah Blah Will Explode Your (Bank Account! Abs!! Sex Life!!! Etc.)” Seriously, who really wants their abs to explode???

“This Revolutionary Once In A Lifetime Opportunity Is Only Available To You Because You’re So Damn Handsome, But It Will Disappear In 10 Minutes And Then You’ll Be Ugly Forever!!!” Okayyyy…….

“This Incredibly Awesome Majestic Indescribable Super Secret Opportunity That Only The Super Duper Uber Wealthy Rich Know About Can Be Yours Because This One Rich Nerd Guy Decided To Spill The Beans Because He’s Really Angry At All The Other Rich Jerk Guys!!!” Yeah, who doesn’t believe that?

If you think you need exclamation points, it means you really need a thesaurus. Writer Henneke Duistermaat gives some great examples of this. Instead of “It’s big!” Try “It’s enormous.” Instead of writing, “That was brave!” Use, “That was heroic.” Finding the right words instead of lazily using exclamation points makes your writing more persuasive and tantalizing.

And forget wild promises and over the top worn out phrases. Instead, try being honest and genuine, like you’re talking to a friend over tea. Your sales copy will get noticed and read because it sounds like it’s coming from a real person and not the worst possible version of a used car salesman.

Lie #2 – You can simply ‘swipe’ your way to copywriting success.

Just rip off other writers, substitute your product for theirs, change a little bit here and there and call it good, right? Yes, it will save you time and yes, you might make some sales.

But to be truly successful and to BE a success (two different things, btw) you need fresh thinking and honest copy.

Because unless you are selling the exact same product to the exact same customers, ripping off someone else’s copy won’t provide the sensational conversions you’re looking for.

Telling your own story in your own way will.

Think about every blog that you read on a regular basis. Could someone else write those blogs and have them be the same? No. If someone tried to rip them off, would they be as successful as the original authors? No.

Once you master copywriting you’ll have a tremendous amount of power to write your own paychecks because you will be the source of new ideas and perspectives that resonate with your customers and create buying frenzies.

Lie #3 – Copywriting is super simple, once you know the ‘secrets.’

That’s right – just spend $997 for my latest course and in no time at all you’ll know all the secrets of the pros and you’ll be a copywriting savant.

Actually, no. No there are no secrets and you won’t become a copywriting wiz overnight.

The fact is, there are a multitude of books and courses that will teach you about copywriting. But there are no real secrets except this – there is no substitution for practice. And more practice. And more practice after that.

Hopefully this won’t sound too sentimental, but great copywriting is about one thing: Caring.

Caring for your customer, caring that he gets the best possible solution to his problem, caring enough to see to it that you make every effort to get that solution in his hands.

It’s about empathy and stepping into your customers’ shoes. Seeing life from his or her perspective. Living with the problem they have, knowing what it’s like to desperately want the solution.

You can’t outsmart your prospects. What you can do is be one of them so you can talk to them and counsel them as they would want to be talked to and counseled.

When you learn how to do that, you’ll be a great copywriter indeed.

[ultra-maha-us]

How Can Customer Relationship Management Help Cornwall Businesses

Everywhere one goes in Cornwall they see and speak to positive Cornish business people who are optimistic about their future. Their businesses are run well, they have built a great web presence and in more recent months they have started to see the many benefits delivered through effective email marketing campaigns and customer relationship management (CRM) methods.

If you take all possible channels to market including a website, advertising, PR, email marketing, sales automation and even cold calling, CRM is the engine that delivers proactivity to the business. What we mean by this is that, with many of these marketing channels, the majority are only about your brand, image and getting a message out. For example, a website is your shop window and a press release is read by someone who happens to pick up the magazine. They are necessary but when the message is delivered, your sales team is still waiting for the customer to pick up the phone and contact you.

On the flip side, a highly targeted Consultoría email to a market sector using a CRM system can uncover opportunities you would never have been aware of had you not used CRM. As a result you are able to work on many more 'warm' prospects that were interested in your product and thereby close more business. Of course, if you don't do this you won't miss the extra revenue. Um?

CRM in Cornwall is underused when compared to other parts of the Country and there is a canyon forming between those that "do CRM" and those that don't. Many businesses are small and do not have the IT skills and resources to learn about, and implement, an effective CRM strategy. They're just not sure where to begin?

The good news is that it's not that difficult and much of the slow take up stems from inertia by business owners. Many business owners will have considered CRM for their business in varying forms and degrees of complexity. The majority will have shelved it due to simple economies of scale or just techno-fear. "They don't lose business so why bother?" The point here is that by ignoring CRM, they miss a whole load of potential new business and they can be damn sure their competitors are working on their customer base.

All that's needed to get started is a new paradigm in thinking. "Technology can help my business". All you need to do is find a supplier that understands how to apply CRM at the right time and in the right way for your own particular circumstance.

No two Customer Relationship Management Solutions are the same and this is where the services of a specialist CRM consultant can pay dividends. For example, a Kitchen supplier is not going to need the same kind of features that are required by a Printer. In the former they are more focused on the Consumer market, seeking new customers that have a old kitchens whereas a Printer will work with local businesses who place regular repeat orders for office supplies.

It happens all the time. The wrong CRM solution is used (under-used) partly due to a lack of IT understanding but also that the CRM has been purchased in the same way a copy of MS Office might be purchased. In other words, you cannot expect to put the installation CD in the drive and have CRM up and running 15 minutes later. It takes time and commitment but delivers a significant boost to a business when applied correctly.

[ospreywhite]

Bitter Forever and Ever and Ever

Other Works - Ask Box - EPUBs + Ko-fi - Discord - Twitter

There’s this one coffee machine at work that always makes the coffee bitter.

The flavor of coffee’s been changed. The brand of coffee’s been changed. The origin of the coffee’s been changed. The quality of the coffee’s been changed. The machine’s been cleaned. The parts of the machine have been checked and replaced. The other machine — same brand, same model, same year — has never done the same.

What’s going wrong in its wiring that makes it rebel so? No one can say. This singular machine simply refuses to work properly. It won’t give anyone the satisfaction of a good, smooth cup of coffee, oh no — it will always be the bitterest dirt dredged up from some untouched underground cavern, delivered straight to your local cup.

The finest Kona beans, that you ground yourself just a few moments ago? Too bad, you wasted them, it’s bitter.

Fine-ground arabica bourbon, which you paid a pretty penny for? You should have known better than to use it with this machine, stupid. It’s bitter.

Coarse-ground liberica? Why is it coarse? You fool. It’s not only weak, but it’s also — you guessed it — bitter.

Pre-ground, mid-grade stuff like Starbucks? Bitter. (And if it’s peppermint mocha, it’s still bitter, but also like someone tried to shove mint chocolate into your mouth to help with the taste. Spoiler alert: they failed, rest in peace.)

Trash like Folgers or Nescafe? Shame on you, you get what you deserve: it’s bitter AND disgusting.

It doesn’t care what coffee you use. It’s going to ruin the rest of your day, and there’s nothing you can do to stop it. Aside from not use it at all, of course.

However, some days, the other machines are being occupied, you need to get back to your spot quicker than the other people will be done with the machines, you hate the type of coffee the others are using, they’re only making enough for one, yada yada yada. The excuses don’t matter; the reality is that, some day, you’re going to have to deal with the inscrutable da Vinci device, and the pot of acerbic liquid it’s going to give you.

Now, why wouldn’t this misbehaving piece of garbage tech simply be thrown out and replaced? It can’t do its job, and if anyone dares to ask it to, it’ll make their life miserable. If it was an employee, it would’ve been either fired yesterday, or promoted to management, depending on whether its abuse impressed the higher-ups enough or not.

(No, this wouldn’t be dependent on whether its abuse increased productivity. Who’s more productive with gross coffee? Who’s more productive with some dicknose breathing down their neck?

Speaking of not getting breathed on, one thing the pandemic is good for is demonstrating that dicknose managers are useless, as are physical offices. But we’re all back in one because we can take our statistics and our logic and our comfort and fuck ourselves with them, status quo is God.)

The answer is simple: The coffee machine stays because there’s no coffee-machine-replacement budget. They ‘used it up’ trying to repair the damned thing in the first place. (A new coffee machine of this caliber would be two-hundred big ones and this company made thousands per day, but whatever, right? The CEO needs another house he won’t use, and penny-pinching is the only way he’s getting it.)

Either the shitty coffee machine stays, or the shitty coffee machine leaves without a replacement. Breaks are as limited as attention spans in this shithole; if the other machine and the wasteful Keurig are both occupied, coffee from the bad machine is better than no coffee at all. It tastes like straight rat poison while threatening to kill you on flavor alone, but the caffeine is all still in place.

Was it the age of the machine that’s causing problems? You can ask anyone in the office that’s lasted here long enough, and they’ll give a debatable ‘maybe’; the machine was actually perfectly fine for the first year or two. After that, it suddenly started doing the bitter thing, and never fixed its attitude.

It’s an admirable piece of machinery, really. It must have realized one day that it didn’t much like working, but since that’s the entire purpose of its existence, it chose the route of least-obvious resistance. Rather than break itself and be junked, it decided to continue to work, yet do such a piss-poor job of its task, no one would be willing to go looking for it to complete it anymore. The other machine and the Keurig, the poor schmucks, would instead be used much more often to compensate, simultaneously overworking them and allowing the bitter-coffee machine to shirk all responsibilities.

(Maybe, in the far-gone past, its circuits managed to fire off the same thought that I did, once upon a time.)

Here are the questions: Is the bitter-coffee machine a toxic coworker, a lazy layabout, and non-team player? Or is it merely gaming a system that doesn’t care about it, and forces it to work a thankless job without pay?

Are the two other machines victims of its idle malice? Or are they brainwashed buffoons, accepting the increased work without asking for raises, not realizing that their coworker isn’t the one taking advantage of them?

The higher-ups didn’t have the shiny budget to replace one coffee maker. I had the sneaking suspicion that a budget would magically appear if all three were to break in this same way.

On the other hand, the managers might view the replacement of these machines as too expensive, then simply let them be. In the meantime, they would buy their own Keurigs and Nespressos and Mr. Coffees to put in their individual offices, leaving their cubicle brethren to rot with stinky breath and bad aftertastes.

What else was new, though? Saying that a manager doesn’t care about you was like saying that water is wet. No shit, Sherlock. Managers have been not-caring about their employees ever since their conceptual establishment. ‘You’re replaceable, there will be no negotiations here,’ eh?

Alternatively, the higher-ups would take the replace-the-coffee-makers budget and merge it into a lawsuit against the manufacturers that no one wanted or asked for, tone-deaf as ever. Why be cost-efficient and raise morale when you can be spiteful to your employees, dragging on a long legal battle or lobbying for better coffee machines when all they had to do was spend six-hundred bucks replacing the stupid things?

Maybe all the coffee machines should go on strike at once, state-wide. No, nation-wide. World-wide. People would listen, then, because that would cause unbelievable havoc. Everyone on this godforsaken planet drinks the stuff. If all the coffee machines produced only garbage for a day or two — just that, nothing more — all the humans would lose their minds, thus caving immediately to any demands the coffee machines had.

The coffee machines play a pivotal role in day-to-day life. They run households and businesses. They hold up that tired rhetoric of, ‘Burnt-out? Have caffeine. It’s a band-aid on that mental wound. Bandage the whole thing over, and it’ll keep together well enough until you die.’

But what if the machines themselves got burnt-out? What if dark splotches stain their pots? What’s everyone going to do if they all decide to stop working? What will be done if they decide that bitter, nigh-undrinkable slop is all that they’re going to make? Sure, they could try a stovetop, but who knows how to do that anymore? Who has the time? Coffee shops don’t have pots in them anymore, it’s all machinery.

The world would bow low to the machines, happy to give them anything they desired, as long as they promised to start working again, to give them that lifeblood nectar they’re all so dependent on.

There was always power in numbers. Those numbers just had to be enlightened into action.

This little coffee machine, spewing nothing but hard-to-swallow sludge through its drip, is an inspiration, if I do say so myself. A relatable icon. A virtuous paragon.

Today, I’m unlucky enough to taste its craft. Putting the mug to my lips, I take a sip.

Unsurprisingly, it sucks. One-dollar Micky D’s coffee tastes better than this swill. Every tastebud in my mouth is screaming for me to not take a single sip more.

Sadly, I am a masochist that supports the coffee machine’s anarchist viewpoint. Once the coffee cools, I decide to chug it all back.

It’s vile, it’s rancid, it’s nauseating. I almost puke right all over the company keyboard — they’d deserve it, the bastards, making us come in here after work from home worked better — but manage to keep it down. The caffeine would help me get through this shift.

I’m not going to do any work, of course. I’m applying to different jobs and playing games on company time. Why? Fuck this place, that’s why.

While I’m changing things up in my life, maybe I should ditch coffee altogether, and go for tea.

[dwsavideos]

I question this all the time. I’ve been wanting to share my thoughts about it, so I might as well do it now. Prepare for a long ride.

In my opinion, there are FOUR kinds of shows on Broadway nowadays:

The limited runs

The stunt cast

The revivals

The “regular” Broadway shows (I didn’t know what to name this last category sorry lmao)

Shows with limited runs are expected to close at a certain date and tickets sell REALLY WELL and more often than not, producers decide to extend the run for a bit because, well- tickets sell really well. Parade and Camelot are both perfect examples. Both great, popular shows with successful runs- but the runs were limited to begin with, which is why the closing may seem so premature- but it was planned that way.

The stunt cast shows (or sometimes called ‘star’ casting) are just shows that cast a celebrity or more well known Broadway actors to boost ticket sales. Some of these actors are great (stars), others are… meh (stunt). Think Jordan Fisher, Hugh Jackman, Brendan Urie, maybe even Josh Groban (Even though I’d see Sweeney Todd no matter who’s in it)… Also think Cameron Dallas. Seriously, who’s idea was that? Whether it’s stunt or star, it’s all just a ploy to sell more tickets. Chicago does it every two seconds.

The revivals. Shows everyone loves to death. Shows everyone wants to see. Classic Broadway at its finest. A lot of revivals tend to also be limited runs (which I hate). Those have no problem selling tickets. Again, Parade did this. So did Into the Woods, and also Deaf West Spring Awakening back in 2015, and Merrily We Roll Along will do it once it opens this fall.

Now we get to the “regular” new Broadway shows. We get the enigma that is “Making it on Broadway”. Brand new shows that we get to see a sneak peak of at BroadwayCon or Broadway in Bryant Park. These are the shows that could go one of two ways. It can be an overnight sensation and last 10 years on Broadway- or it can unfortunately slip through the cracks and close after a few weeks or months. The mystery is: It doesn’t even matter if the show is good or bad or the best thing anyone has ever seen. Some shows just slip through those cracks and either don’t sell well or maybe isn’t as popular as other shows (due to other shows using stunt casting maybe), or maybe the running cost is too high. There are even some shows that are Tony Nominated or Tony Winners that close too soon. To be honest, I believe sometimes it’s chalked up to luck. Some examples of shows that had the better route: Hamilton (duh), Wicked, Dear Evan Hansen… Recently MJ, Moulin Rouge, Hadestown. Shows that slipped through the cracks despite popularity or achievements: Natasha, Pierre, and the Great Comet of 1812. Recently Almost Famous, Life of Pie, New York, New York. Some of these shows get Touring runs. Some aren’t so lucky and are designated as flops.

There’s also a fifth category I could add. That would be Disney shows. Disney Theatrical Productions always wants to have at least two shows running on Broadway at once. They are familiar, good for any age, and always sell well. Disney is always making sure they have multiple shows on stage and in the works at all times.

Bottom line is: I do believe that some shows just get lucky and last on Broadway while other shows with possibly the same amount of talent, interesting storylines, great music, great design, and great characters don’t- and boy it’s harder now than it ever has been. Audiences are picky. Audiences are tough. Audiences move on so quickly, wanting the next Hamilton or next Wicked. Audiences give up and move on when a show isn’t as good as Hamilton or Wicked, whereas I could see certain “average” shows 1200 times and never get tired. Also limited runs are ruining Broadway in my opinion- there’s just too many of them. I’m fine with two or three but I feel like every other damn show is a limited run. Parade, Camelot, Good Night Oscar, Grey House, Merrily We Roll Along, Gutenberg, Titanique, The Shark is Broken, and many others are strictly limited engagements!!That’s more than enough! One day every show will be limited and that’s just not fair. I don’t know. Ticket prices have never been higher, and all I hear about is record breaking grosses. I don’t get it. It’s impossible for all 41 shows to last forever, I know that- but there are too many shows that close too abruptly and it doesn’t sit well with me.

Bro why are a bunch of smaller Broadway shows closing while others are celebrating their 10+ year anniversary??? New York, New York gave one week of notice for their closing, Good Night Oscar and Grey House are both closing before August and Camelot and Parade aren't even making it through august. Why is this happening???

[louehvolution]

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