#who didn't even know of the train problem until i told her

[immortalsins]

ough the way my friend in my house was insisting that it's best to go to a beach in another city along the coast (to celebrate another friend's birthday) but five of us could go in her car and one would have to take the (expensive, long) train alone (with beach stuff), instead of just going to the smaller but closer beach that we can all get to on the bus together. she stood there and said 'we'll get to the beach quicker in my car than all on the bus' ok five of us will. and the other will not. but that doesn't matter to her

[wileys-russo]

Alessia “babe… I don’t know how to tell you this, but I lost my ring” living room

lost property II a.russo

it wasn't until you got in the car that evening that either of you tweaked anything was wrong, alessia having surprised you with a dinner reservation at your favourite japanese restaurant.

"oh less, why?" you'd questioned right away when you'd arrived home from work and she'd told you, the blonde giving you an odd look and a smile.

"just because." the englishwoman grinned, pecking your lips and sending you upstairs to get ready while she put on a load of washing. an hour later and you were both ready to go, alessia holding up the procession as she hunted for her car keys.

"baby this is why i bought you all the air tags for christmas!" you reminded gently, a thin lipped smile on your face as you tapped your foot, the pair of you now running late for your reservation as alessia dug through her training bag for the second time.

"i don't need them! i don't have a problem with losing things, this is a one off." your fiance huffed stubbornly as you exhaled, sinking down into the sofa. "we could just order in?" you suggested, knowing it took a lot to tip the level headed blonde over the edge but recognizing she was close to snapping.

"no. we're both ready, and you look gorgeous. they're here somewhere!" alessia paused to send you a smile before resuming her digging through her bag, moving quickly onto her favourite handbag and purse but also coming up empty handed.

"i'll go check upstairs less, and you look beautiful!" you rose up from the lounge, ducking down to kiss her cheek and taking the steps two at a time, disappearing into your bedroom.

"found them!" you called out within seconds, a roll of your eyes as you snatched her keys off the bathroom counter and also her phone with a scoff. "where?" alessia was already waiting at the bottom of the steps with wide eyes.

"bathroom, where you showered right after training." you laughed, twirling them around on your finger and holding them out of the taller girls reach, hovering a few steps above her.

"should you call them? let them know we're running late?" you suggested, alessia nodding and slipping a hand into the pocket of her blazer, the temptation to grin swallowed down at the frown on the footballers face as she patted herself down.

"i can't-" "bit hard to call without a phone?" you questioned, eyebrow raised and the device held in your other hand as alessia's cheeks flushed pink. "you'd lose your head if it wasn't attached to your body darling." you teased, her keys and phone slipped into her hands as you squeezed her face in your free hand as you passed.

"this is just a bad example. i do not have a problem with losing things!"

only as your fiance finally pulled out of your driveway and you hung up with the restaurant who agreed to hold you table, did you note there was something quite noticeably missing from her left hand which gripped the steering wheel.

"less." you called for her attention as she hummed, eyes on the road and both hands on the wheel, slowing down at a red light and glancing toward you with a raised eyebrow.

"baby wheres your ring?" you asked quietly, the strikers eyes dropping immediately to her hands which she balled up and moved to her lap. "i uh-well i-" the blonde stumbled over her words, jolting in her seat as she light turned green and the car behind her honked twice telling her to move.

"alessia. did you lose your engagement ring?" you asked slowly, eyes narrowing as your fiance could almost feel the tension rise ten fold within the car, hairs on the back of her neck prickling at the hardened look which burned the side of her face.

"no! babe of course not, of course i didn't lose it." the blonde assured, reaching across to squeeze your knee. "right. so then where is it?" you questioned, arms moving to cross as your fiance shifted in her seat, eyes refusing to meet your own.

"its uh, its being cleaned!" alessia excused, flashing you a nervous smile as you hummed. "the engagement ring that you've had for two weeks...needed to be cleaned?" you asked clearly not believing the poor attempt at a lie.

"yes! yes i was uh, i was showing the girls and i forgot to take it off while we were training. then of course it rained today, and the ring well it got muddy." alessia lied, nodding as if to convince herself more than you, turning right into the carpark.

"it got muddy?" "yes, muddy." "and you couldn't have just wiped it?" "wiped my engagement ring? you don't wipe diamonds!" alessia scoffed, putting her car into park and giving you a look of shock which you met with a blank stare.

"look at this baby, see how it sparkles? catches the light? thats because you take such good care of it, much better care than me. but i would never lose my ring! never." alessia laced her fingers with yours, holding up your engagement ring as you rolled your eyes.

"you spin a decent story russo." you gave her a slight smile, unclicking your belt as the blonde kissed the back of your hand and let go to do the same, the pair of you exiting the car.

"now my love, would i lie to you?"

~

"leah!" the blonde glanced up from her breakfast at the call of her name, eyebrows furrowing together at the younger girl practically barreling through the cafeteria to get to her, dropping into her seat and trying to catch her breath.

"less?" leah questioned, taking a bite of toast, a few odd glances thrown alessia's way whose chest heaved, not even dressed for training yet as she'd run right from her car to the table.

"i lied to my fiance and i think our marriage might be over before its even started." the blonde stated bluntly, leah choking on a mouthful of toast at the sentence, beths hand smacking her on the back as she joined the pair with a plate of food.

"you right? you know you're old enough now to know you have to chew before you swallow leah." the norhterner smirked as her friend gave her an evil side eye, quickly chugging the last few mouthfuls of juice.

"alessia you've not even been engaged for a month, how is your marriage over already? you've loved that girl for years!" leah asked once she could speak again, beths eyes near bugging out of her head.

"what did you do to that poor lovely girl alessia?" she spoke up sternly, eyes narrowing as alessia scoffed. "why do you assume i did something?" the striker questioned, leah clearing her throat capturing the attention back to her.

"to quote well uh, you. 'i lied to my fiance and i think our marriage might be over before its even started'." leah mocked, fixing the younger girl with a look who paled and sunk into her seat with a sigh.

"i lost my ring." "sorry speak up please some of us don't speak whisper." "i lost my ring."

"uh i hope you mean literally any other ring and not your engagement ring alessia!" beth gasped as the striker winced and shushed her. "oh less forget the wedding being off, you're a dead woman. can any of the venues you were thinking of accommodate a funeral?" leah questioned, alessia shooting her daggers before dragging her hands down her face with a quiet groan.

"she is always on you about being more mindful of your possessions, little miss forget a lot!" beth reminded as your fiance exhaled heavily.

"i know i know! i didn't mean to i just..." "forgot?" both beth and leah chimed in sync sharing a grin as alessia huffed. "are you two going to help me or not?"

"right. so we need to retrace all of your steps from yesterday, where did you start?" leah asked as the three of them made their way out of the canteen, having merely an hour to do so before they were required on the pitch.

"my car. but i already tossed that last night after she fell asleep, and i searched the house top to bottom it's definitely not at home." alessia affirmed as leah hummed.

"so you walked in through the front doors and-" "alessia!" a new voice interrupted them, one of the trainers waving from the end of the hall as he chased after the trio.

"not now henry i'm so sorry, girl talk." alessia called back, jolting the man in his tracks who nodded with a strange look, opening his mouth to speak but they'd already disappeared into the change rooms.

and an hour later as the trio wandered out onto the pitch, alessia was still ring-less, word spreading throughout the team some of whom checked in with her and others (kyra) who seemed to think it was hilarious.

it was obvious her mind was elsewhere during the first session, missing easy goals, easy passes, tripping over herself with her head in the clouds as your voice echoed around in her head.

renee pulling the striker aside to check in alessia assured she was just having an off day and everything was fine, beth and leah watching a few feet away as they hung back after the whistle, the rest of the team filing inside for lunch.

"hey less!" again henry called after her as alessia joined beth and leah, the trio already trying to plot where else the ring may have been left, leah now making an excuse that they all had recovery and couldn't be late as she ushered them back inside.

the later in the day it became, the more alessia's stress grew, now going as far as to be dodging your calls and ignoring your texts, having a day off from work and trying to do the groceries without the list you'd asked her to write out yesterday, another thing she'd forgot.

"the more ya dodge her the more its gonna bite you in the ass later less." beth cautioned, watching the younger girl silence your call and slip her phone into her pocket with a wince, trudging through the car park with slumped shoulders and a face like she was being marched to her execution.

"good luck mate, its been lovely knowing you." leah sighed squeezing her shoulder as alessia pushed her hand off with a scowl, the older blonde snickering and jogging off to catch up with steph who she'd driven in with.

you were starting to grow worried the later in the day it became and your fiances car still hadn't appeared in the driveway, all your calls going to voicemail and texts unanswered.

you paced around the living room, darting to the window like an excited puppy every time you thought you heard her, only to deflate seeing it was just one of your neighbours.

though when afternoon turned to evening and still there was no sign of her, all of the girls confirming she'd left right after training same as them, your worry began to fester and stew, doubts creeping in no matter how much you tried to push them out.

you bounced your knee and bit your lip as your mind drew itself to a conclusion you tried to refuse to believe.

the fancy dinner last night, the insistence to make you breakfast in bed before she'd left for training, the cute little note on the fridge, the lack of a wedding ring, the unexplained absence, the dodged phone calls and messages you could see she'd read.

then finally, the engine, the hurried footsteps and a key in the door.

"baby? it's just me!" she sang out, the thump of her training bag against the floor and shuffle of her shoes wiped against the welcome mat sounding afterward, but you didn't make a move to go and greet her.

"hey i thought we agreed to watch that together! its thursday night that means takeout and trashy tv shows." your fiance whined seeing you already a half an hour into an episode of the real housewives.

a show alessia had been adamant she would never watch or enjoy however after days of her 'curious' questions and hovering around the sofa pretending to be busy whenever you'd put it on you'd worn her down to actually sit and watch, and since then she was hooked.

"are you cheating on me?" it came spewing out of you before you could even take a beat to process, pausing the television and head whipping around to meet your fiances gobsmacked features.

"am i what?" "are you, cheating, on me?" you repeated a little firmer this time, swallowing the fear of her answer and trying to give her the hardest look you could muster.

"i-why would you think i would ever in a million years cheat on you?" alessia rounded the sofa in the blink of an eye as you sat with arms crossed and a frown.

"you took me out for a fancy dinner to distract me, you didn't wear your ring, you've been ignoring me all day and you finished training hours ago but you only just got home and no one can tell me where you've been!" you accused, alessia's face falling.

"baby-" "no alessia, where have you been? who have you been with? does she work at the restaurant? is that why you took me there so you could-" you gasped, shooting up to your feet as the blonde groaned.

"no! no no no no. can you please sit down? i will explain everything." alessias hands fell to your shoulders, very gently pushing you back down to the sofa, shifting uncomfortably under your prickly glare.

"babe i don't know how to tell you this. but...i lost my ring." alessia mumbled quietly, foot nudging a scuffed patch of carpet. "you what?" you asked, not quite hearing her properly as she winced.

"i uh, i lost my ring." "you mean the cleaner lost your ring?" "no...it was never at the cleaners." "right. so you lied to me about it?" "no!" "alessia you are skating on thin ice-" "okay yes! yes i told a little lie. but i promise you i have spent the entire day trying to find it, thats why i'm so late!" alessia collapsed onto the sofa beside you and buried her face in her hands.

but before you could say anything the doorbell rang, and when your fiance made no move to get up to answer it too busy indulging in her little pity party you got up to get it.

"uh hi?" you spoke to the unfamiliar man on your doorstep who took a step back as you pulled the door open. "i'm so sorry to bother you this late, but is alessia here?" you noticed the arsenal badge on his jacket and the word staff sewn underneath, nodding and calling out for the blonde.

"henry? is everything alright?" alessia questioned, surprised to see him to say the least as his hand fished around in his pocket. "look i tried to talk to you all day but-" he grunted and rummaged deeper into his pockets.

"-but i didn't think you'd want to wait any longer for a reunion." with that he fished a sandwich bag out of his pocket and at the sight of its contents alessia's jaw nearly hit the floor.

"my ring! jesus christ henry if i wasnt engaged i'd kiss you." alessia breathed out as he handed it over and you rammed your elbow into her side with a glare making the trainer chuckle.

"i've been married for three years now. good luck! see you tomorrow." the man grinned and with a wave he was walking back down the driveway, the door closed as alessia scrambled to slide the ring back onto her finger with a deep exhale of relief.

one which was interrupted by a clearing of your throat.

"baby-" "no. nope! no, not a word." you warned, a hand held up to stop her advancing toward you as she'd started, a sheepish smile and guilt ingrained deep in her features.

"i'm really sorry?" "thats three words." "i love you?"

"lie to me again and you can have this back." you warned seriously pointing to the ring on your own finger, your fiance nodding eagerly and launching at you for a hug which you ducked.

"baby where are you going?" "to find a needle and thread." "...why?"

"because alessia we are going to take those air tags i got you for christmas and sew one into everything you own, and then after that i'm going to stitch that ring permanently to your finger!"

[one-green-frog]

Hellooooo

Hope you're having a good day :)

Platonic yandere batfam x male/gn reader who's trying to hie their powers and/or scars?

Frostbitten

Yan!Batfam x m!reader with ice powers, because i love iceman (x-men)

You were always good at hiding things. Even before all the training you received from the world's best detective. You lived a life of secrets even before you met your family, every day spent living as if the next moment your secret would be spilled. You learned to hide the scars, hide the accidents, you needed to, especially living in Gotham, the city where Batman ruled and one thing that Batman hated was metas

It is common knowledge that Batman hates them, hates their powers and hates them especially when they can't be controlled. So you hid them, never trying to learn how to control, just how to hide. Maybe that was your biggest mistake, but who could fault you, you just wanted to live a simple live in this god awful city.

And then you got adopted by Bruce Wayne, a dream come true. Suddenly you were thrust in this new life, filled with joy and laughter and a very loving family, you cherished every moment with them. But even more surprising was when they revealed their secret vigilante life. In that moment you didn't know whether to feel excited or scared. Sure, you looked up to Gotham’s vigilantes, almost everyone did, but you had a secret to hide, you had to keep it locked away and your biggest enemy is a family filled with detectives and a father that hates metas.

If you could hide your powers, hide the scars, then maybe everything would just be alright. Maybe they'd just dissappear and everything could be normal for once, a normal life with an almost normal family. They could never find out.

Because Bruce didn’t want those powers in Gotham. He never said it outright, not to your face, but he didn’t have to. You heard the way he talked about metas. Heard the tension in his voice when a case came in involving superhumans. How he preferred things predictable. Grounded. Human. Easy to controll

So you made yourself human.

Your family never asked why you always write long sleeves, even in some. Sure, the occasional "Aren't you hot? " was asked, but simply denying it sobbed that problem. Honestly you never were, you naturally run cold, probably because of you powers. The scars on your hands were a bit more difficult to hide, running around in gloves was just too obvious so when asked you simply told them it made you uncomfortable to talk about. Your family, every supportive and loving, stopped asking, not wanting to make you uneasy though their worried gazes never left you.

In all honesty, life was great, especially after you joined them on patrol. The training was hard, but worth it if it meant you could accompany them during the night. Everything was great.

Until it all fell apart.

It had been instinct, really.

The building was collapsing, a hostage still trapped inside, and you didn’t have time to wait. You didn’t even think. Just felt the fear spike in your chest—and then you were moving.

And freezing.

Everything in front of you exploded in jagged ice—brilliant, unnatural, alive. It lanced out from your arms, blooming outward, catching the falling beams, holding the wreckage suspended mid-air. You grabbed the girl, carried her out, felt her tremble in your arms—not from the danger, but from the cold that clung to your skin like a curse. You didn't even have time to feel relieved after exiting the flaming building, not when you saw the shocked faced of you family. In you adrenaline high you didn't think that they were just shocked, no, to you their faces obviously showed detestation. Especially Batman, clearly the guy with the no-meta-rule would absolutely loath you no matter if you are his kid or not.

You didn’t go home after that.

You couldn’t.

Not when you could still feel the way they looked at you.

Not angry. Not yet. But surprised. Confused. Like they didn’t know you anymore.

And if they didn’t know you—if they saw what you really were—what was stopping them from pushing you away?

You practically ripped the comms from you ear and ran. They could find you if they really wanted to, but you were hoping—praying—they wouldn’t.

Not until you could breathe again.

Not until the ice stopped crawling up your spine.

Not until the scars stopped burning.

---

You ended up in the park.

It was late. Empty.

Perfect since you wanted bo one to bother you.

You sat under the trees, hands shoved deep in your jacket, hood pulled low, hands shaking. You kept your gloves on, even though they were already half-frozen. They didn't protect you from anything, it was a way to hide the ice, hide it away so you couldn't see it. But you could feel the ache in your skin—those little jagged lines across your arms and hands, like old lightning strikes. Nerve damage, probably. But it wasn’t the nerves that hurt.

It was the memory.

Of growing up cold.

Of hurting people by accident.

Of locking yourself in closets to cry because your body didn’t know what to do with heat, and every time your emotions spiked, you left frostbite behind.

You used to think you’d grow out of it.

That was the lie that kept you going.

A nightmare that would someday finally end.

But now you were older. And it was worse than ever.

And now Bruce knew.

Your family knew.

And everything was ruined.

They were looking for you.

You should’ve expected that.

Dick was the first one you spotted—high above, on the buildings, doing that graceful acrobat silhouette thing he always did when he thought no one was watching. You could tell he was worried. He kept checking corners like he thought you'd vanish into shadows.

You pulled your hood lower.

Then you heard Red Hood.

Jason was stomping through the park like he’d kill the trees if they got in his way. Angry. Shaking. He was yelling your name now and then, but it wasn’t rage in his voice—it was panic. You’d never heard that tone from him before. Not even on the worst nights.

You turned away. Curled tighter. Pulled your knees to your chest and tried to stop the cold from spreading.

It was Tim who found you.

Of course it was.

He wasn’t loud. He wasn’t dramatic.

He just sat down beside you without a word. Quiet. Calm. Familiar.

You didn’t look at him.

Didn’t say anything.

But you felt the warmth of his presence, and you hated yourself for shivering closer to it.

He wrapped his cape, it did little to fight the cold.

Then he finally spoke

“Why didn’t you tell us?” he asked finally. Not accusing. Just soft. Tired.

You couldn’t answer.

You were too scared your voice would crack.

Too scared to speak the truth into the world.

Jason showed up next. Then Dick. Damian, sulking behind them, wrapped in one of Alfred’s scarves. They didn’t drag you home. They didn’t guilt you. They just sat. All around you. On the frozen grass. Wherever they could.

And Bruce came last.

Of course he did.

Silent. Steady.

You almost wanted him to yell. To be angry. To say you betrayed them. To banish you from the city.

It would’ve been easier.

But instead, he crouched in front of you, face unreadable.

“Do you want to come home?” he asked quietly.

That question shattered you.

Because you did.

God, you did.

But you didn’t think you deserved it.

They got you back to the manor somehow. You barely remember it.

Everything felt distant. Fuzzy. Like a dream you weren’t allowed to wake up from.

You ended up in your room, wrapped in three blankets and a hoodie you forgot you owned. Tim was fiddling with the thermostat. Dick was in the hallway talking to Alfred about heat pads, while Damian gathered all his pets to join you in bed.

Jason was closest.

He sat beside your bed, glaring at your hands like he wanted to fight them.

You didn’t mean to, but you flinched.

“I’m not mad,” he said, voice lower than usual. “Just… you’ve been hurting. For a long time. And you didn’t tell

The next day they finally saw you hands

They didn’t ask. But they were there when you woke up from a nightmare and ripped your gloves off in a panic. They saw the spiderweb of pale, cracked skin down your arms. The frostbitten patches. The places where the cold had eaten away at you from the inside.

You waited for them to recoil.

They didn’t.

Dick sat beside you and ran warm fingers along the worst lines, like they were battle scars, not damage, not a curse. He pressed his forehead to yours and said nothing.

Jason kissed the top of your head and told you that scars didn’t make you ugly.

Damian brought a salve that smelled like mint and helped rub it into your palms.

Tim found you a compression shirt designed for cryogenic trauma. Quietly handed it to you like it wasn’t a big deal.

Bruce didn’t say much.

He just held your hand one night when you were shaking too hard to sleep.

And didn’t let go.

That night you cried yourself to sleep, either from exhaustion or because of all the emotions going through you. That night you also realized that your family truly loved you. Bruce explained that he never could hate you or any meta, he was simply scared of what could happen to them or the people around them.

They loved you.

Not despite the cold—but including it.

The way the frost followed your footsteps. The way your tears came out as vapor in the air. The way you always wore gloves, even when it wasn’t needed.

They learned to warm your sheets before bed. Left heating pads in your seat at dinner. Gave you permission to feel—even when it made the walls frost over.

You were scared for so long.

But they never were.

You weren’t the monster.

Just a boy with ice in his blood, and too much fear in his heart.

And a family who would walk through a blizzard to bring you home.

Thank you for requesting, i absolutely loved writing this, i hope this is similar to how you imagined it! And sorry it took so long!

Taglist: @lilyalone

[blueberrypancakesworld]

I love your writing can I request a yandere Yelena with younger female reader who is in college please and thank you ♥️💕

My little spider

Yelena Belova x fem!reader

warning : yandere, stalking, kiss, age gap, manipulation

Summary : Before the Thunderbolts, her only redemption seemed to be the little bit of hope a single student had in her. Something the blonde older didn't want to lose, she never wanted to lose her love, she would never lose it. She had lost family and loved ones before, the former Black Widow would make sure not to lose anyone again.

info : Hi, of course you can have something like this, I'm glad you like my writing so much. I hope you like this little one-shot here, have fun reading ;)

masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They shouldn't have met at all, they should never have met, they lived in two different worlds from an early age.

She was a trained assassin, an assassin, someone who could start wars, overthrow governments and destroy families with one precise shot and the younger one was a simple art history college student who was busy with books and paintings.

They were two worlds that would never have met until the moment a small spider seemed to meet the Black Widow, one dark night in crowded New York, the younger one was simply on her way home from the library.

Still a little lost in thought about the report she had to hand in the day after tomorrow, she had barely noticed the shadow in the alley next to her and would actually have kept walking if she hadn't heard the distinct sound of pain.

No crying or screaming, just a muffled curse and a pained gasp as she saw the dark suit, the holsters, the weapons.

The person who suddenly seemed far too unrealistic, a woman holding her bleeding side, “Do you have a bandage?” was the only question she was asked.

A question so banal in the face of a serious gunshot wound that she barely realized it at first before she picked herself up and went to the older woman to support her.

Who would have thought that a mission with serious consequences would lead Yelena to someone so innocent, someone who didn't know her, who didn't know the dead...someone who looked at her with kindness and genuine concern and made the older girl wonder how she had earned such a thing when she left with the younger one.

This initial encounter a pure coincidence, Yelena had only told a couple of half lies and half truths, “I'll be gone soon bookworm” she mumbled the accent stronger through the pain as she was on her second beer the younger had left in the fridge.

It was strange to have a stranger in front of her like this, a stranger whose eyes were all over her, whose upper body was exposed and only covered by her top, the bandage and compress lying at her side over the emergency wound Yelena had received.

Despite everything, after a few hours of exchanging a few sentences, Yelena decided to sleep on the couch and the "Good night...Russian spider" made her smile, as the other girl had no idea.

The next day she was gone and even though she had only known Yelena for a few hours, the interest she had shown in the books and pictures was somehow cute.

She was pretty even when she was so cute and yet she seemed dangerous, like a spider that spun a web before it struck.

Was it good that she had disappeared again?

A question that arose even a few days after the incident and which prevented her from concentrating on her studies again on the evening of the weekend.

It had been a week since the blonde had been with her, she still had to think about the stranger from time to time, but in a world where aliens had attacked the city more than once, anything seemed possible.

Just as she reached for the key to her apartment and opened the door, the door inside bumped against something she heard a small thud, going inside she was surprised to see that she had knocked over a package.

The problem was when the surprise turned to surprise when she realized that she hadn't ordered anything, that there was no return address on it, that it wasn't from a known company...it was from Yelena.

When she had put her bag down and sat down on the couch in the same place as Yelena, she unwrapped the package and a small showcase with a preserved spider came out next to a note.

Will you come back to me as a spider? she asked herself and put the box on the table before she read the note and couldn't help smiling a little.

The older woman thanked her for the help, for the canned ravioli, the beer and the night on the couch, but most of all she thanked her for caring, something that was actually taken for granted, but apparently in Yelena's world such a thing didn't seem to exist.

It could have stayed that way, but in the days and nights that followed, she couldn't shake the feeling of being watched, like when she saw shadows everywhere.

She swore she felt the same watchful eyes on her, saw the blond hair and once even felt in a half-sleep state that someone had touched her.

How could she not think so when the older one had been following her since the night before, never letting her go and, apart from the initial lack of gifts, always making sure that the younger one was well.

What was a simple daily task for her in the free time between the hours was breaking into the apartment at night and lying next to her in bed, patting her, holding her hand carefully and whispering “Thank you”, she never heard it, because once again there seemed to be something between them.

Until the moment when the fear and discomfort increased, when this gratitude, the obsession and perhaps something more spilled over and she ran straight home.

The shadows of the night were deceptive, but their own fear was even more deceptive.

What was out there that was after her?

Slamming the door behind her, just wanting to make a cup of tea, get some rest, just try to get back to normal life, a cry escaped her when she saw someone sitting on her couch, “Yelena! You scared me to death” she shouted as she leaned against the kitchen counter.

In the light that was now on, Yelena was sitting on the table with two beers in front of her and seemed to have been waiting for her for hours.

The question of how she had come in, what she was doing and what she was doing was burning inside her, but the exuberant look, the joy and somehow also the gratitude were a total contrast.

"Sorry lovely, I thought we could have a drink together again", she said casually as if nothing had happened, waiting for the younger woman to calm down and come over to her voluntarily.

Because if there was one thing Yelena wanted to do better was to learn from her mistakes, she had killed enough, had enough blood on her hands...she wanted to be gentle for once, she wanted to have that chance for once.

And when she saw how the little spider, struck by the poison of kindness, came to her, believed her lies and rhetoric, sat down next to her and drank the beer, Yelena knew exactly that everything was going according to plan.

How she gained her trust, how she willingly drew closer, placed her hand on Yelena's, a contrast so soft and small compared to the older woman's that she realized she had never killed anyone before. That her gaze was honest, that there had to be affection in it, it couldn't be any other way, it had to be so.

Yelena would get rid of her sins and guilt so easily when, after hours, the younger one leaned against her as she fell asleep and the older one kissed her on the head, “Sleep well, I'll take care of you forever”.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[tvgirlie24]

Not Enough pt.2

After that gruesome training session Alexia desperately tries to fix things between the two of you, you’re having none of it.

Angst (some fluff?)

part 1

The first thing that you felt upon regaining consciousness was an unbearable headache. You didn't think you've ever experienced anything like this. You were uncomfortable, in pain and overall just really confused. The last thing you could remember was someone telling you to keep your eyes open everything else was pretty much a haze. You've made the mistake of trying to open your eyes now, but you were immediately blinded by the intense light of the room and quickly closed them again. The rest of your senses were slowly coming back as well, as you could hear someone quietly talking close to you. There were more voices as well, but you couldn't quite tell who it was. You tried moving your arm as you could feel a needle poking your skin but the second you moved someone held your arm down.

"You're awake! Oh, thank god, you had us scared for a second." Ingrid? Again? Not that you expected anyone else really but even Ingrid being here with you was surprising enough. Despite knowing that she stood up for you yesterday it still didn't make sense why all of a sudden she was so interested in providing you support. Maybe she felt sorry for you?

"Uhh, what the fuck?" Your voice was hoarse, barely above a whisper. 

"You passed out, like an hour ago, we were starting to consider taking you to the hospital if you didn't wake up. Do you not remember?"

"I just remember feeling really dizzy and that’s pretty much it."

"You should've said something if you didn't feel well you know, that was pretty irresponsible, you could've hurt yourself." Whilst you knew Ingrid’s scolding came from a place of worry you really didn’t appreciate her words right now. As if it was your fault. Partially yes, but no one stepped in when Alexia was taking it too far. No one stood up for you, and you were at fault? 

“As if me saying I didn’t feel good would’ve done anything.” You murmured and Ingrid gave you a sympathetic look. 

You slowly sat up, with the help of Ingrid and looked around. A physio was next to you, checking your vitals and on the other side of the room was the last person you wanted to see right now. Alexia, looking all guilty and it seemed as though she wanted to say something but kept changing her mind at the last minute. 

You got tired of waiting after she opened and closed her mouth for the fourth time. “What do you want?” You snapped.

“I, uh, I just-, I’m sorry, really, I didn’t mean to take it so far. I didn’t know you felt sick, If I did I-“ 

“You would have done the exact same thing, we both know that.” You interrupted, not really interested in hearing any of her excuses.

“What? No! No, really-“

“Are you sure? You’re saying that if I came up to you and said I’m not feeling well, you wouldn’t have told me that I’m just slacking off?” You asked, though you already knew what the answer would be. 

Nothing, no response. Just as you thought.

“Thought so. I really don’t understand what your problem is. I would understand if you just had some doubts about me, everyone does, I’m used to it. But you have absolutely no reason to hate me and I’m really fucking tired of it. I do everything that I can and yet you always have something to complain about. I’ve had enough of this, I don’t want to do this anymore. I fucking heard you yesterday. I know you think I don’t belong here, I know you think I’m not good enough, but fuck you didn’t even give me an actual chance and I’m sick of it. I don’t fucking deserve this.” You didn’t even realize that tears were streaming down your face or that with each sentence you voice kept getting louder and louder until you were practically screaming in her face but you didn’t care. It felt nice to let it out, all of the frustration you have felt for the past couple of weeks. She kept taking her frustration out on you, now it was you turn. 

She was about to say something but you had no interest in hearing what she was about to say. Whatever she was about to tell you would never warrant her behavior towards you. 

“No, I’m not doing this right now, I’m leaving.“ You stood up abruptly and felt yourself get dizzy again, Alexia reached out her arms to steady you but you quickly steadied yourself and walked past her to the physio. 

“Get it out.” You said while giving him your arm, where an IV was administered, but the physio didn’t move and just looked hesitantly at you.

“Get it out or I’m going to rip it out of my arm myself, I don’t care, your way or my way, you choose.” You barked out. You knew you were being unfair, and unnecessarily mean, the man didn’t do anything to you. But you were so angry with the whole world right now that you couldn’t care less about who was on the receiving end of your outburst. You needed to get it out and most importantly you needed to leave, if being harsh meant you could get out of there sooner then you had no problem being a bitch. For once you just didn’t care. 

The man grabbed your arm and carefully pulled out the IV from your vein, while staring at you very disapprovingly but you didn’t give him a chance to say something, quickly turning around and gathering your things.

“You should have someone drive you, it’s not safe for you to drive yet.” Spoke out the man, despite knowing you were probably not going to listen to him. 

“I’ll be fine.” You dismissed. 

“I can dri-“ Tried saying Alexia but you didn’t even let her finish the sentence, too worked up to let her finish.

“No, there’s no way in hell I’m getting into a car with you Alexia. I would rather crash my car into a building.” 

“Then I’ll drive you.” Offered Ingrid but before you could refuse, she started talking again. 

“Really, please, let me give you a ride, I’ll have María pick me up. I really don’t think it’s a good idea for you to drive.” She pleaded and you were too tired to argue with her. “Okay, fine, whatever.” And with that you walked out of the room, with Ingrid closely behind you. Not sparing Alexia a single look.

The ride home didn’t take too long, despite having to give Ingrid instruction, given that you lived pretty close anyway. A fact, which you were grateful for because you physically couldn’t wait for the moment you lied down on your bed. This also meant that it didn’t take Mapi too long to pick up Ingrid, not that you weren’t enjoying her company, but right now you were much too eager to finally get some rest, so when you saw her pull up in your driveway you quickly hugged Ingrid goodbye and shut your front door, leaving both women standing outside confused.

You didn’t do anything else for the rest of the day, still not feeling too well, but also so mentally drained that all you could do was just bury yourself under blankets and order you favorite take out after taking a much needed shower, finally somewhat content after the horrendous day you just had. And as you were slowly falling asleep you couldn’t help but wonder if the rest of your stay in Barcelona would be like this. Hopeless and miserable, filled with unpleasant trainings and you questioning why you even came here in the first place. 

__________________________________________

When you woke up the following day you could feel dread completely consuming your whole body. You were terrified of going to training today, but there was no way you could skip training when you were scheduled to be starting in the match tomorrow. Physically you felt okay, you were rested and the dizziness and headache from yesterday were gone. But mentally you were everything but okay. You didn't know what to expect but each second you were becoming more of a nervous wreck. You didn’t know what today would be like and that was what freaked you out the most.

Walking in wasn't any better, everyone was nice but you haven't had to chance to see the one person you dreaded seeing the most, but it appears as though luck was on your side today because you ended up not seeing Alexia all the way to the locker room. Strangely enough the only two people that were there were Ingrid and Mapi. You greeted them quietly and started changing, not saying anything else but as you sat down on the bench to tie your shoelaces you noticed just how hard your hands were shaking. You let out a frustrated huff when even on your third try you still couldn't manage to tie your laces. It was irrational, the way tears started to cloud your vision but you were overwhelmed with every negative emotion that there is and all of a sudden even a simple thing like inability to tie your shoes has immediately put you on the edge. 

Just as you were about to try again someone appeared in front of you, but you refused to raise your head and let whoever it was see just how much of a mess you were. 

"Need a hand?" Ingrid asked gently. At this point you should've expected it would be her. So far, she's been the only one to offer you any support. But through your life you've only ever been met with a cold shoulder, so anyone being there for you just wasn't something you were used to. You don't think this is something you will ever get used to. 

"No thanks, I got it." You actually didn't, but it was easier to struggle alone, it's all you've ever known. No one ever taught you how to accept help, constantly reminding you to not rely on anyone.

"Let me help, please." She asked again. And as much as you wanted to refuse, you didn't have it in you. So, you just pulled away and let her tie your shoes, like a little kid but you were way past the point of caring. You still kept your head down, not wanting her to see you crying. 

"There you go, hey, hey, what's going on?" 

"No, no it's nothing don't worry, i'm fine." You said frantically trying to dry your tears, though unsuccessfully.

"Look, you don't have to tell me, but you don't need to lie to me, I can see you're not fine." With how gentle she was being it was basically impossible for you not to tell her. You couldn't remember the last time someone spoke to you like this, maybe, when you were a kid and your mom was comforting you after you fell from your bike, but even that memory didn’t  feel as warm as this. So, you decided to open up to her, just a little, even if everything in you told you not to. 

"I'm just freaking out a little. These past few training sessions have been hell and I just, I guess I'm just nervous. I really don't want to mess up again." You admitted, already regretting saying anything at all but Ingrid just gave you a soft smile, lightly squeezing your leg, offering you a bit of comfort.

"Hey, no don't say that, you haven't messed up anything."

"That's not what Alexia thinks." You murmured. "It doesn't matter what she thinks." She argued.

"But it does, she's the captain." You argued weakly, because it did, it would always matter what she thought. And if she thought you were not worth being here, then everything was doomed.

"Look, she will come around I promise. And especially after yesterday I don't think she's going to be so harsh anymore." She kept trying to convince you and you weren't sure if it was because she was actually speaking the truth or because she was just trying to calm you down. "I'm having a really hard time believing you, to be honest."

"I get it but I promise, it's going to be okay, really."

"Thank you. Again. You've really been saving my ass these past few days." Both of you let out a small laugh at that. 

"You don't have anything to thank me for, really. I'm just being a decent human being." 

"Trust me, that's more than I usually get. So, I appreciate it, and you." She gave you a sad smile at that. You didn't mean to sound so depressing, but that's how it was. You really didn't feel like sugarcoating the truth just for the sake of not sounding like a complete loser. 

You didn't say anything afterwards and neither did Ingrid, she just offered you a hand and helped you stand up. She kept her hold on your hand and slowly pulled you in for a hug. You froze momentarily, not really expecting it, but quickly relaxed and hugged her back. 

"I know you've had it tough and I'm really sorry about it, but I'm here for you, for anything you need. I know what it feels like when you think you're all alone, but I promise you're not, at least not anymore." Tears clouded your vision again but for an entirely different reason now. God you really were a wreck today. You didn't trust yourself to speak so you just squeezed her harder, hoping that she understands your gratitude. 

__________________________________________

You wouldn't say you were necessarily calm after your conversation with Ingrid, but at least you were not on the verge of a complete breakdown anymore, so that's a win. That changed the second you saw Alexia approach you. From experience you knew not to expect anything good from her, so her next words left you completely speechless. 

"Are you feeling okay?" She asked simply, her face not giving you any indication of what she was thinking. Out of all the things she could've said to you, you really didn't expect her to care about how you were feeling. So, you just stared at her, not knowing what to say. She raised her eyebrows though, silently telling you that she was expecting an answer.

"Uhm, I-, yeah, I'm fine." You stuttered, internally cursing yourself for sounding like a complete idiot. She didn't didn't say anything else, just giving you a faint nod that was barely noticeable before turning around and leaving.

The beginning of the training was all formalities, and you were pretty much spaced out until you all started running laps, not really paying attention to anything else, but just as you were about go run the extra laps that Alexia always orders you to, you could hear her shouting. 

"What are you doing?" She asked sternly and you braced yourself for another scolding. You didn't know what you've done wrong, again, but you were definitely not about to argue with her.

"Uhh, I'm about to run the extra lap? Like always?" You said, rather hesitantly, not really knowing what to expect next. 

"No, it's okay, you don't have to, go stretch." She replied and you gave her a simple nod, absolutely flabbergasted.

Since you came here, she always ordered you to run extra laps, to repeat the drills, her telling you not to felt way too weird. For a second you wondered if it was a joke, or if she just went crazy, because this was not the Alexia you knew. But she kept on surprising you today, because each time you were about to do something she kept on stopping you, reminding you to take it easy and repeatedly asking you if you felt okay. 

You were confused at first, not understanding what her point was at all. But that confusion quickly started turning into anger, why did she decide to be nice to you now? She could've been nice to you this whole time and she would've saved both of you a lot of trouble. Why did it take you passing out for her to come to her senses and actually start treating you like a human? So, the next time you heard her tell you to slow down you really had to bite your tongue because you got dangerously close to telling her to fuck off. You were positively furious, your blood was boiling and you kept having to remind yourself to stay calm. 

Breaking point came when she handed you a bottle of water that you could’ve easily gotten yourself, a simple innocent gesture. Under any other circumstances you would’ve just said thank you, but in this very moment that was the last thing you wanted to say. You hated it, how all this time you wanted her to treat you like a human and that’s what she was doing, yet it was only driving you crazy, and against your better judgement you ended up snapping at her.

“Okay I really don’t understand what you’re trying to achieve today, but it is driving me insane. You mind explaining to me what the fuck you’re doing?” You snapped with a frown on your face and you could see the colour draining from her face as she looked as you as though she has seen a ghost.

“I-, uhm, I just wanted to make sure you were okay, you know, after yesterday and you know…” she trailed off, awfully shy for someone who was yelling in your face less than 24 hours ago. 

“Well, I’m fantastic of course! How do you think I’m doing? I don’t want to be here, I don’t want to be around you and I certainly don’t want you making sure I’m fine! It’s too late for it now, I don’t care if you feel guilty it’s your own fault Alexia! You don’t get to treat me like a piece of shit and then act all nice hoping that will make up for it.”

Maybe if you weren’t so angry you would’ve felt a bit sorry for her because she truly looked like a kicked puppy after that little outburst. But she didn’t say anything and with a scoff you turned around and left. You didn’t even bother changing, just slumping your bag over your shoulder and escaping to your car as fast as you could. You were lucky you left a bit early and the parking lot was still empty, otherwise everyone would’ve seen and heard the yell you let out once you got into the car. 

That woman really is going to be the death of you. 

__________________________________________

So, the match really didn’t end up that well for you. You ended up winning 3-1 so it wasn’t that much of a disaster for the team, but your performance today was less than good. You were all over the place, but never where you were needed, completely missing passes and none of your shots came even close to a goal. It was painful to watch and you really weren’t surprised when you came off in the 63rd minute. You couldn’t stick around and keep watching it, too angry with yourself so you immediately went inside to take a shower, hoping that a nice cold shower might calm down not just your body but also your mind. 

Once you got out of the shower you could tell that the game was over since some of the players were already inside while some stayed out on the pitch. You hoped to have a bit more time to pull yourself together before everyone would come pouring in. The shower did absolutely nothing to help you and once you started crying there was no way you would be able to stop. Maybe Alexia was right, maybe everything really was just handed over to you and maybe you really weren’t that good. 

You tried to avoid everyone’s stares while you took your bag and excused yourself, leaving the locker room and hoping to find some quiet place to cry it all out. You tried several doors, most of them locked but you managed to stumble open a door that was unlocked and once you opened it you could see it was just a small conference room, abandoned a long time ago given how empty it was. So, you threw your bag and the floor and made a beeline for the corner, slumping down and burying your head in your knees, trying to make yourself as small as possible. The first sob you let out was rough, so rough it actually hurt, but it felt way so good to finally let it out. You cried so hard that you could feel your whole body shake, and each second it was becoming harder and harder to breath.

You completely forgot to keep a track of time, knowing that you were due to leave soon, but in that moment that was the least of your worries. All of a sudden, you could hear someone open the door but you refused to raise your head, much too comfortable in your little bubble, so you couldn’t tell who it was.

Please be Ingrid, please let it be Ingrid.

“Hey..” 

Oh God, no.

“Hey, what’s going on?” Alexia tried again after she got no response from you. 

“Go away.” You pleaded but instead of turning around she just got closer and on instinct you tried to push yourself closer to the wall to create more space between you. “No please, please go away, please I don’t want you here.” 

She didn’t go away, instead she slowly lowered herself onto the ground until she was sitting in front of you, not too far but not too close, which you appreciated. If she were to disturb your personal space in your current state you would probably just freak out even more. 

“Please, tell me what’s wrong? Why are you crying?” She asked softly, you’ve never heard her speak like that, let alone to you, but you didn’t let that break you. “No, please, just let me be.” You cried, even harder, wanting her to get away from you as soon as possible.

“I will, once you tell me what’s wrong.” She didn’t get a response from you, all that could be heard in the quiet room was your ragged breathing.

“Is this about the game? Is that why you’re so worked up?” She kept her voice gentle, and it made it hard to keep ignoring her, but you weren’t quite ready to talk to her yet. So, all that she got in response was just a whine, one that resembled an agreement. 

“Look I get it, no one likes bad days, but they’re a part of what we do, we can’t have a perfect performance all the time, as much as we want to. It is not the end of the world, I promise.” She tried to comfort you, not realizing she was doing the exact opposite.

“It is when everyone around you thinks that you don’t deserve to be a part of the team and you constantly have something to prove, then it pretty much is the end of the world.” Your voice was rough and you looked like a mess but you still raised your head as you spoke, wanting her to understand that the biggest reason why you were crying was her own doing. You didn’t necessarily feel secure at Barça before, but it definitely wasn’t as bad as it is now, and it was mostly Alexia’s fault. 

She frowned, thinking about what to say next. 

“Look, I’m sorry, I really am. I was an arrogant asshole and I took it too far, but none of what I said is true. I did think it was but I don’t anymore and I don’t want you thinking it’s true. It is not, you deserve to be here, okay?” 

“But that’s not what you thought 3 days ago.” You murmured, Alexia barely hearing you.

“No, it’s not. But a person that gets everything handed to them doesn’t train until they actually pass out, you know.” Again, no response from you, but she refused to give up. At least now your sobbing subsided to just small hiccups.

“I know I messed up, and I will forever feel sorry about it, but I don’t want you to doubt whether you deserve to be here or not. You do, you work hard and I didn’t see it then, but I see it now, okay?” Alexia said firmly, and it was hard not to believe her, with how gently but convincingly she was speaking. “Okay.” 

She gave you a soft nod and slowly stood up, offering you a hand and even though you felt like you shouldn’t, you accepted her help. She carefully helped you stand up, holding you up when you wobbled a little from your legs falling asleep. 

“Come on, they’re all probably waiting for us.” She gave your hand a light squeeze and let go and you followed her out of the room.

All of a sudden you didn’t feel like the world was ending, everything that was going on now seemed almost manageable and you walked out of that room with a small, barely noticeable smile on your face.

__________________________________________

Yaaay I finally finished the second part🥳 Sorry for the delay I wanted to get this out over 2 weeks ago, but I hope you liked it anyway :)

@marvelwomen-simp

[nathaslosthershit]

Tensions Fall (Teen Dad!Oscar AU)

(part 2 to Tensions rise, also apart of this AU although these two fics can be read separately)

A/N: 7 weeks since the once happy couple have actually talked. 7 weeks since they shared a bed, but with their two toddlers starting camp for the first time, maybe they can try and mend their problems.

Warnings: Parental separation, a super mean mom like the ones I have to deal with at work, angst WITH A HAPPY ENDING

May 28, 2024

It had been 7 weeks since the fight in Suzuka that effectively ended Oscar and Honey’s relationship. It had been 7 weeks since Oscar had taken a leave of absence from racing in order to try and make amends with his family. He still trained everyday, he still worked with McLaren and did Sim Racing, he just never attended any of the Grand Prixs. 

It had also been 7 weeks since Honey and Oscar had shared a bed. 

Since that night she left their room, she had stayed in her kids’ hotel room till they got home. She then packed her things and moved into the guest bedroom. Things had been far from amicable between the two parents. In the beginning, Oscar had done all he could to try and make up with Honey but when she continued to give him the cold shoulder, he had given up and reciprocated her attitude. The children, about to turn 4 years old, didn’t know the full extent of what was happening at home. They knew that when they would go to their parents’ room in the morning, only Dad would be there, but this was easily explained away when Honey told them that Oscar snored too loudly and it kept her up at night.

They had of course also noticed how different their parents had acted towards each other, and how often their father was home now, but they just didn’t question it because at the end of the day, they were too young to begin to understand, and they still had two parents who loved them as much as they could.

Since the fight though, it was clear Oscar was making much more of an effort to take his kids out to do activities. At first it was nice, Honey got some time alone, something she rarely got anymore, but the more Oscar took over planning activities, the more she began to hate being alone. After three, almost four, years of being around her kids almost 24/7, the silence started to eat away at her. And in turn, her kids started to miss their mom more. 

Finally though, Honey had put her foot down, after a long conversation, ending in a fight, Oscar had agreed to more full family activities, even if it meant having to pretend with Honey that they were still the happy and perfect family. 

While their kids loved going to the park as a family, any parent around could see that the two parents watching their twins on the bench were fighting but trying so hard to conceal their whispered harsh words behind smiles. 

With the twins' fourth birthday coming up on June 8th, Oscar and Honey had been stressing on how they were going to plan their birthday while they couldn’t get through a conversation without being at each other's throats. They also had the kids’ first day of camp coming up May 29, a day that may seem insignificant to most parents, but as the kids had never been to preschool, nor a daycare, camp was their first introduction into that whole system. It was a big step for everyone.

Honey had been trying to prepare the kids the best she could for their first day at camp. She knew they didn't fully grasp the concept and she was nervous about leaving them alone, scared they would feel abandoned as child-care with non-familial adults wasn’t something they had experienced with their mother being a stay at home mom, only ever enlisting help from grandparents, cousins, and even ‘honorary uncles’ such as Logan and Lando. She had to keep telling herself that in the end, they will at least have each other. 

Oscar and Honey decided to make a day of it. Camp wasn’t until 9, so the pair took the very excited Hudson and Frances out to breakfast where the 3 year olds managed to cover themselves head to toe in maple syrup and chocolate from their pancakes, causing them to have to rush home to change, thus leading the family to a late arrival to the preschool building that the camp was held in. 

“We are so sorry, oh my goodness!” Honey said to one of the two teachers who were clearly waiting for them outside the door to the classroom.

“We decided to take these two to breakfast and they got more food on their clothes than they did in their mouths. Which reminds me, I added two extra changes of clothes to their bag in case they need it.” Oscar added, causing Honey to shoot him a glare that was luckily not seen by the younger of the teachers, as the younger teacher was too busy ogling at Oscar to notice. It was her that added the clothes to their bag, it was also her idea, he was being petty by taking credit.

After a few moments of silence as they waited for the woman’s reply, she managed to snap herself out of whatever daydream she was concocting only minutes after meeting the young father in front of her to reply with a quick, “No problem! We know how these kids can be.”

The older woman next to her clearly could sense her coworker was a little two focused on one of the parents and pointedly urged her to take their bags to their cubbies while she sorted the family out, which Honey was grateful for. She may have not been with Oscar anymore but that lady didn’t know it and had no right to eye fuck him in front of her and her children of all people. 

“Why don’t you all say goodbye out here, we are just about to start morning meeting with the other kids.” The older woman said as she stepped to the side to give the family privacy, thought she was close enough to hear all they would say.

Oscar and Honey both felt tears begin to form as they squatted down in front of their kids. 

“Alright, Mommy and Daddy have to go now, but you both are going to stay here and make some new friends. I know this is new and might be a little scary but if you guys get through today, we can all go get ice cream later. How does that sound?” Honey asked, nervous one of her kids was going to break down in tears at any moment. 

“Okay! Bye Mommy, bye Daddy!” Frances yelled as she ran through the open door to the classroom, clearly ready to get started.

Oscar and Honey weren’t necessarily shocked at what their very clearly extroverted daughter had just done, but they still had expected a little bit of pushback from her. They could see the older woman by the door laughing softly to herself at that interaction. 

Their son, Hudson, was less enthusiastic. He didn’t cry, which they had fully expected him to, but he gave them crushingly tight hugs, or as crushing as he could manage, and a quick kiss on the cheek before following after his sister.

Wiping away tears, they both stood up and laughed once they looked at each other's faces, realizing they were both far more of a mess than their kids.

“Wow, maybe we should have been giving ourselves pep talks for weeks instead of them” Oscar joked. Honey laughed, it was the first normal interaction they had had in what felt like forever. 

The older woman, still by the door, quickly joined in, “Oh don’t worry, we find parents are usually the ones with the most trouble at dropoff, but that moment they find you both after a day of camp or school, you will feel just how much they missed and love you. Plus you two are young, you’ve got plenty of more time to make more of those babies. You have grown yourself a real sweet family by the looks of it. Relax for a few hours! Enjoy the time off, maybe even add to your family.” The woman said, laughing, as she closed the door.

“Did she really just suggest we go make more babies?” Honey asked in disbelief.

“I think she did, yeah.” Oscar answered, just as confused as she was. 

The air felt light as they both walked to their car, relishing in how nice it was that they weren’t arguing, realizing how miserable they had been.

But that didn’t last long. 

“Come on, Oscar, you can’t be that dense! She was so clearly eye fucking you!” Honey argued. The conversation in the car had been light for a few minutes until Honey made a comment about the younger teacher and unintentionally started an argument.

“She was not! And if she was, who cares? We aren’t together anymore, you can’t get jealous over something as trivial as someone who thinks I am attractive. Sometime in the future I will get a partner so you better learn to stop being jealous.” Oscar yelled. He didn’t mean it of course, he knew even if he and Honey never got back together, he would remain single. She was the only one for him.

But what he had said, wording it in a way that made Honey fully think about their situation really tore her apart. Yes, they were separated, but she never felt like they were fully broken up. And from what he said, it sounded like he planned on moving on much faster than she ever would.

With tears rolling down her cheeks, she decided to not dignify his comments with a response. Once exiting the car, she swiftly went to the guest room she had been staying in since the separation and slammed the door.

After a few minutes in the car, Oscar had mustered up the courage to apologize, knowing what he did was uncouth. Hearing her cries as he walked up to her door made him stop just short of knocking, deciding maybe it was better to give her a bit of time for now and come up with a way to make it up later.

After two hours of contemplation, Oscar had decided to get a lunch reservation at her favorite restaurant that always had a live band playing. It was impossible to get a day of reservations but with a bit of bribing, he had managed to pull it off. What was also nice about the band was that they could sit and eat silently without any awkward silence. If they were going to fight, they didn’t need to speak. 

She wasn’t crying when he knocked on her door, having managed to seemingly get all her emotions out in the two hours by herself, then clean up to look presentable for pick up. But now she felt empty, like a shell of a person in a house with a man who once loved her to pieces but now seemed to despise her, and no kids because they were away at camp. 

“Come in.” Was all she said.

“I um, I got us a reservation to your favorite place. I understand if you aren’t up for going- or if you’d like to go alone, but I did kind of bribe them so one of us at least has to go, I fear.” Oscar muttered out fast, clearly sensing the awkward energy between them, not knowing whether they were going to ignore the fight or not.

But Honey’s heart burst at the idea of him trying so hard to get into her favorite place. She always urged him to use his name to get into places, like Lando loved to do, but he was always too humble to do it, so it meant even more that he had this time. 

“That… sounds wonderful. Thank you, Oscar.” Was all she said as she started to tear up again but quickly turned so he wouldn’t see. “Let me get my stuff and I can meet you in the car.”

The energy in the car wasn’t light like it was before, but it also wasn’t heavy. A comfortable silence stayed between the two until it got too much for Honey and she burst out into tears, seemingly unprompted. 

“Darling, what's wrong? Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Oscar asked, openly concerned for her well being for the first time in what felt like years.

“I c-can’t take it, Oscar! We used to have so much love for each other, god, you used to look at me like I hung the stars in the sky, now you can’t seem to look at me for more than a second without realizing how much you hate me now. Then after saying you are going to move on to someone else- you do this really sweet thing and I am- I am so confused and hurt and don’t know what to think or do!” Honey rambled, everything truly coming to the surface. Everything she thought, everything she felt, everything she had tried too hard to push down and pretend wasn’t there.

“Honey, I have never hated you for even a second,” was all Oscar was able to reply as he registered everything she had just said.

“What?”

“I don’t think I am capable of it. Truly. I have tried so hard to be the best I could be for you after the fight. I stopped racing, I planned more activities with the kids, but I couldn’t do anything right. I let rumors continue about you making me stop racing, which I wanted to stop but was told to leave alone. I took the kids to do activities and left you out too much. When you continued giving me the cold shoulder, I gave up when I should have kept fighting. I then tried to love you less, to make it hurt less, but I couldn’t, even if I acted like a dickhead to you. I am so sorry, Honey, and I would never in a million years be with someone else, even if you had an entire other family and were happily married. You are it for me, always have been, always will be.”

With all finally being said, the two went to lunch happier than they had been in weeks, ready to work on their relationship. It was surely not going to be easy, but how they had been these past two months had broken them enough that they were certainly willing to try. 

Near the end of the meal though, things once again got tense. These two couldn’t catch a break it seemed.

Zak Brown, CEO of McLaren, called Oscsar out of the blue and as the phone rang, Honey’s heart sank, awaiting Oscar’s reaction.

“Shit, I should get thi-” 

“It's okay. I promise.” Honey said, already feeling doubt beginning to creep in.

She couldn’t hear much of the conversation as Oscar quickly walked out the door to talk to Zak. He was also turned away from her so any chances of learning information by reading his facial expressions went out the window.

Finally, he returned to Honey biting her nails waiting for what he would say to her. She already started to panic thinking he could have to go to work, race again, and this vicious cycle would never end, that nothing would ever be right between them.

“What did he want?” She asked.

“Asked when I would be ready to come back to race. I said I didn’t have a date in mind. He told me to come in next week for a meeting on it, but I said I wouldn’t make a decision without talking to my family. I am not going to lose you all over this.” He reassured her. 

Honey smiled, doubt leaving as quickly as it had come. Until she herself got a phone call, this time from the camp her kids were at. Stressing that they had missed pick up, she realized after checking the clock that they still had an hour and a half. Confused once more, she answered the call.

Being told on your kids' first day away from you that there was an issue you needed to go deal with immediately, that you needed to fill out both incident and accident report forms wasn’t something that the young parents had envisioned for themselves. 

Rushing to the classroom, Oscar and Honey saw both of their kids crying in the hallway with the older teacher when they arrived, accompanied by another mother and her upset son. Concern laced their features as they took in both their kids, looking for any hints of injury on the two, but they seemed fine, apart from the crying.

“God, don’t tell me these two kids are the parents, no wonder this happened.” The other mother muttered under her breath. Before Oscar could question her, the older teacher spoke up.

“It seems there was a problem between the kids today.” She began, clearly trying to mediate the situation before it got ugly between the parents. “Mattias here stole a toy Hudson was playing with and pushed him over when he tried to get it back. In turn, Fraces bit the Mattias. It didn’t even leave a mark so I know it wasn’t hard, and both kids got a talking to as well as exchanged apologies, but it seems that they might need to go home early for the day to recuperate. We will certainly work on sharing and using our words tomorrow.”

Both Honey and Oscar were shocked. While Hudson was quiet and they had been worried it would make him a target in the future, and they knew their daughter was fiercely protective of her twin, they didn’t think she would result to biting.

“Wow, alright. You two, let's discuss this in the car, yeah?” Oscar said, ready to leave the place as he felt the wrath of the other parent glaring at him. “Really? You are just going to walk away without so much as an apology to me and my son? Unbelievable.” The mother scoffed. “This is why young people shouldn’t be parents. Clearly you two need to grow up just as much. I pray your already terrible daughter grows out of this and doesn't end up like you, spreading her legs too young and becoming up a teen mom because of it.”

Both Honey and Oscar were stunned. They had faced backlash before, sure, but never to their face, and never from someone so clearly in the wrong.

“Excuse me?” Honey asked.

“Oh, you heard me.” The mother replied.

“No, I don’t think I did, because what it sounded like was you were asking for an apology for something your kid started, because I am sure as hell my kids do not have sharing problems. Then when my three year old daughter retaliates to seeing her sweet and vulnerable brother being so blatantly bullied, even though she apologized, you believe you and your snot nosed brat deserve anything else. Guess what, we don’t owe you shit. And while you are so worried about how our kids will end up, why don’t you worry about your own child, who clearly takes after his bully of a mother. Grow up, asshole.” Honey retaliated. She shouldn’t have sworn in front of the kids but damn was it wonderful to see the look on that lady’s face. 

Oscar had never been more turned on by Honey in his life.

After the fight, the family of four got out of there as soon as they could, stopping for ice cream on the way home. They hardly scolded Frances more than a “If someone does something mean, you can’t bite them, use your words” to which she replied “Like Momma did with that lady?” 

The kids were playing quietly in their room once Oscar got alone time with Honey. 

“That was the sexiest thing I have ever seen.” He said, arms circling her waist.

“When I went full bitch mode on that lady?” She asked, laughing at the desire so evident in his eyes.

“When you stood up for your family, and cursed that dickhead out.” He replied as he started kissing her neck.

“I’m glad you enjoyed it, I liked it too but in a different way than you did.” She laughed.

Laying on the bed, cuddling as they basked in the love they still had for each other. Oscar managed to ask the question that had been plaguing him for weeks.

“Honey, will you please move back in here and be with me again? I miss you too much.” Oscar pleaded.

“Fine, but you need to work on another proposal. It is only fair since this all kind of started because of you.”

“Deal, this time I will knock your socks off with my proposal, but first I intend on showing you just how much I missed you.” He said as he began to kiss her deeper and more passionately.

Life was starting to get much better. 

[imagine-you]

all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me [Logan/Reader]

Summary: Sequel to won't somebody come take me home? and closer to where I started. Now that you've decided to put the past behind you, you're focused solely on what the future holds for you, Logan, and your family. Whether that means teaming up with the X-Men to help stop the escalated attacks around the city or sitting down for a nice dinner with Logan, Laura, and Wade, you're ready for all of it. You're so close to being completely happy until you find yourself a victim of one of the attacks and find out that someone from Logan's universe has managed to return. You never expected your new life to be easy, but you certainly never thought Logan's wife would show up and disrupt everything you had built for yourself. Word Count: 9k Author's Note: This chapter may contain: Angst, Reader Whump, Surprise Cameos, Angst, A New Villain, A Disrupted Villain Origin Story, Training Montages, Angst, A Smidge of Hope, Illusions, and…Angst. (but I swear the angst gets resolved. y'all have to trust me!! there will be a happy ending for this fic.)

When I'm With You I'm Home 'verse

won't somebody come take me home? // closer to where I started

Read on AO3

If anyone had told you while you were stuck in the Void that there was a future where you found yourself in another universe and your greatest wish had come true, then you would have chalked it up to a pipe dream and left it at that. If anyone had told you there was a future where your worst nightmare had come true, well then, that would've been easier to believe.  

"What are you making?" Laura asked, peering over your shoulder to get a look at the stove.  

"Something special," you told her, winking at her when she let out an impatient huff. "Steak and pasta," you clarified, turning your attention back to where you were spooning sauce over the steaks, hoping the flavor carried through for you.  

After getting back from your original universe, you had felt like the weight of the past had been lifted off your shoulders. You didn't give a fuck about your original Logan and as far as you were concerned, he could fuck off into whatever happy existence he wanted with Jean. Did you want them to suffer? Maybe. But it was no longer a requirement for you to heal.  

Your Logan had made sure of that.  

Now, weeks had passed, and you felt like a new person. Gone was the obsession with the past and in its place was now your excitement for the future.  

Your future with Logan and Laura and even Wade. Your future with a new family and a new team. Life hadn’t given you a moment of rest, but you were happy to know that when your back was against the wall, you had people ready to jump in and protect you from whatever hit came your way.  

All of you had spent the last couple of weeks wrapped up in the escalated attacks happening throughout the city. There weren't many indicators about who exactly was causing them. Half the time, there were explosions and other times it was just an outright slaughter.  

Logan and Wade were out trying to help the X-Men clean up the latest catastrophe. You had opted to stay home with Laura, taking a moment of well-deserved rest from running from one tragedy to the next. Logan had left you with a promise to return that evening and a kiss that hinted at more later.  

You thought it was cute how Logan kept insisting he was retired, but the first sign of trouble, and he couldn't help but jump right in. It was why you loved him, because even though he had spent years spiraling after the devastation he faced with his old life, he still couldn't help but try to make things better for others.  

You liked to think you had a little something to do with that.  

Even though you were just within reach from a perfect existence, you knew it still wasn't without its problems. You and Logan still had a lot of work to do. Both of you were still holding things close to the chest, afraid to show them and lose everything you had earned.  

Sometimes, you caught Logan simply watching you, wary and concerned, as if he thought you were about to leave him. Other times, when Logan woke in the middle of the night and reached for you, you wondered if he knew it was you or if he still held onto the memory of his wife, seeking her for comfort. Logan had been open and honest with you, but you sometimes got the feeling that he wasn't telling you everything. Some nights, when you couldn't sleep, you would lie awake and watch him, terrified that if given the chance he would leave you in a heartbeat for his old life.  

You always had the feeling like the other shoe was about to drop, so you had taken on the mentality that you were going to enjoy every day you got with him. Which was why you were hellbent on making the perfect dinner and having the perfect dessert all ready to go when he got back home. 

"Shit," you hissed when you started stirring together the ingredients for the pasta sauce. "I forgot one thing," you groaned, glancing over at Laura. "I've got to go out to grab something. Will you keep an eye on this for me? Just make sure it doesn't burn," you instructed her when Laura gifted you with a skeptical look. 

"What if it burns?" Laura wondered, reaching out to take the spoon from you when you handed it to her.  

"Then we'll order takeout," you answered with a shrug of your shoulders. "It won't be a big deal, but I still want to try to get this right," you told her, reaching out to flick her ear. 

Laura turned a glare on you, and you knew if you were anyone else, she would have already brought out her claws. You saw a fond smile take the place of her scowl before she shook her head. "Hurry," she urged you, turning a wary look at the stove.  

"Ten minutes," you promised, reaching out to grab your keys and wallet. "Just going down to the corner store." You saw Laura open her mouth and you knew what she was going to ask. "Yes, I'll get the cookies," you told her, thinking of the chocolate monstrosities she was so obsessed with lately.  

Laura grinned at you, pleased, and cautiously began to stir the sauce.  

You locked the apartment door behind you. You knew Laura was more than capable of taking care of herself and she had already been through hell and back, but you couldn't help but want to protect her in every way you could. She was still a kid, even if she would point out she was seventeen.  

You made it to the tiny market just around the corner from your apartment within four minutes. You were eager to get back and finish dinner. You couldn't wait to see the look on Logan's face when you had dinner all set up and told him that Laura even helped make it. You knew Wade would invite himself to dinner, so you would of course have extra just for him. You knew you wouldn’t be here without him, and while he drove you crazy, you now couldn’t imagine your life without him in it.  

You were a family, fucked up and weird, but full of love.  

You grabbed the cookies Laura wanted and searched for a can of black olives. You caught sight of the spices and started in that direction to see if there was anything extra you wanted to add to the sauce. You figured you had maybe five minutes to get back before Laura insisted she did everything she could to salvage dinner, but maybe you should just order pizza.  

You were reaching out to grab a bottle of parsley flakes when you noticed something pass right in front of you. You startled at the sight of the playing card, faintly glowing pink, as it sailed towards the shelves in front of you.  

You didn't even have time to prepare before the card landed and the shelves exploded. You brought your arms up, trying to shield your face from the shrapnel. The force of the blast was strong enough to throw you back into the shelves behind you. You felt your head connect with the edge of one the shelves and stars exploded in your vision.  

There was a ringing in your ears and the taste of blood in your mouth. Your head felt like it was spinning as you struggled to open your eyes, not even sure when you had closed them.  

You could hear footsteps approaching you and you managed to squint up at the person standing in front of you. Your gaze drifted from his boots to his trench coat and then up to his eyes. They were glowing a faint red.  

"Remy?" You groaned, reaching up to press a hand to your forehead. You blinked a couple of times, trying to make sense of what was going on. You looked at your fingers and they were stained red, blood coating them. Your face was stinging from the bits of shrapnel you hadn’t been able to shield yourself from and the back of your head was aching in a way you had never felt before.  

Remy crouched down in front of you. He reached out and tucked his fingers under your chin, forcing you to look at him. "Now, I know we've never met before, so how is it you know my name?" He turned your head one way and then the other, considering you for a brief moment, before he made a thoughtful noise. "Oh, but believe me, we're going to get to know each other real well, bon ami. Just you wait." His eyes were no longer glowing, but there was a devious look in them you didn't like.  

You attempted to sit up, but your vision swam and you felt like you were going to throw up. “What the hell are you doing?” You attempted to ask, but your words were slurred, and you were having a hard time concentrating on him even though he was right in front of you.  

"Let's get you home, hm?" Remy said, gathering you up in his arms. He stood, lifting you with him, and you tried to wriggle out of his hold, but he was clutching you tightly enough that you couldn’t move.  

The last thing you saw was the underside Remy's jaw and the blur of the ceiling tiles above you before darkness swept in to collect you.  

You woke to sunlight that had escaped past the curtains in your bedroom and crept right towards you. It was an unwelcome intrusion and you brought your hand up to shield your eyes.  

You groaned, forcing yourself to sit up, before squinting at your surroundings. Your head was aching, each pound of your heart sending a bolt of pain right behind your eyes. You didn’t remember drinking the night before or even crawling into bed, but it felt like the worst hangover you had ever experienced. 

"Fuck," you grumbled before forcing yourself out of bed. Logan seemed to already be up, and you wondered if he had liked your dinner the night before. There was something wrong, something off, but you didn't know what it was yet. You were having trouble thinking past the pain.  

You walked towards your bedroom door, intent on hunting down the bottle of painkillers you kept in the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. You tried to think about what happened before you fell asleep and finally your memories came back to you in a dizzying rush.  

Making dinner, leaving Laura in charge, and locking the door behind you. Going to the store, a playing card that ending in an explosion, and Remy promising to take you home.  

"I had the weirdest dream," you muttered as you stumbled out into the living room. The pain in your head spiked with every footstep and your mouth was so dry your tongue felt like it was sticking to the roof of your mouth.  

The first thing you noticed was that Logan was sitting at the kitchen table and the second was that he wasn't alone. You froze just a few feet away from the table trying to make sense of what was in front of you.  

Because Logan was there in his usual seat at the table and he had his hand outstretched over the surface. His hand was clutching the stranger's like a lifeline and he looked as if the person in front of him had just saved him from his own personal torment.  

You slowly rounded the table, a twisting feeling of dread in your gut, as you got a look at the stranger.  

It was you.  

Well, not you. She had a scar crossing one of her eyes and her hair was a different color. She carried herself with more confidence, her shoulders not slumped and head held high. She was wearing the same yellow and blue X-Men suit you first saw your Logan in when you were trapped in the Void.  

But she was still undeniably you. Just a variant you could have been in another universe.  

"What?" You felt helpless as you looked to her and then to Logan. Pain had been overtaken by confusion and now you felt like you were going to pass out for an entirely different reason. "What's going on?" 

"My wife," Logan said, finally tearing his gaze away from her to look at you. "She's back. A portal opened up last night and she walked right through it." His voice was filled with incredulous awe, and it felt like there was a knife digging into your chest. Your breath hitched and you tried to push past the feeling being carved out right where your heart resided.  

You didn't think it could get any worse until you noticed the look of pure love and adoration he gifted her. You had only ever seen that look aimed at you and seeing it given so freely to someone else had you clenching your fists at your sides, anger washing over you.  

"So, what?" You snapped, trying and failing to keep the hurt out of your tone. "She's just going to live here now? We'll all be one big happy family?" You didn't want to fight anyone for Logan's attention. Not again. Not after what happened with Jean in your other universe. You couldn't lose again. You wouldn't.  

Logan stared up at you before he finally looked back at his wife. "We're still married," he pointed out, brushing his thumb gently over the wedding ring on his wife's hand. "And she was my first love," he continued, twisting the knife deeper and deeper. "I'm sorry, but I can't leave her again." 

You watched the couple in front of you, frozen in that moment. Hurt and indecision rose within you and you felt trapped.  

"So, what does that mean for me?" Your voice sounded so small and scared that you almost didn't believe it was yours. You had never felt this way with your Logan before and you didn't know what to do.  

Logan finally tore his gaze away from his wife to look at you again.  

"I'm sorry, but now that I have her back...," he trailed off, letting you assume the rest for yourself. "You can stay until you find somewhere else to go," he offered, as if it was any consolation.  

You let out a hollow little laugh as you took a step away from him. You couldn't believe what you were hearing. Logan, after everything you had been through together, was giving you up as if you meant nothing to him. The same ache and loneliness you felt back in your original universe was descending on you again. You thought you had put those feelings behind you, but now you were having to confront them again in the worst way.  

Because this Logan had loved you like the other one never had and this one had promised never to hurt you. But here he was, crushing any hope you had that this Logan would be different.  

You forced yourself to turn around, putting your back to them. You couldn't stand to look at them anymore.  

You were faced with Laura standing there in the doorway of the apartment. She was silent, watching you, and you had a sinking feeling in your gut that told you this wouldn't go your way either.  

"Laura, I--," you started as you approached her, not even sure where you would end up. "Do you want to come with me?" Was what you settled on, because evidently you couldn't stay here. You had been through so much with Laura. You had survived the Void together and fought together just to survive. Surely, that had to mean something to her. ‘Don’t leave me all alone,’ was what you wanted to beg, but you didn’t want Logan to have the satisfaction of seeing you brought down to your lowest point.  

Laura took a few steps forward and you wondered if she would meet you in the middle. Instead, she walked past you and stood at the table, joining Logan and his wife. "I can't lose him again," Laura said, echoing your thoughts. Except, Laura could stay and you had to go.  

You saw Logan's wife, the other you, the one he was choosing over you, reach out to flick Laura's ear. Instead of snapping at her, Laura turned a fond, soft smile on the other you and you felt another piece of your heart break.  

That was your thing with Laura and that should have been your smile. Logan's wife had swept in and cleared you out, leaving no room for you.  

You could feel the fight or flight instinct rising within you and you chose to get the hell out of there. It wasn't your home anymore, because someone had filled your role. You were no longer needed.  

You didn't even know where you were going to go, but you somehow found yourself right at Wade's doorstep. You brought your hand up to knock, terror and despair coursing through you.  

Wade answered the door in a suit and tie. You would have asked him what the hell was going on, but he didn't give you a chance to talk. He leaned on the doorframe, considering you with a grimace. "I thought you'd show up here after you found out." 

"You know?" You weren't sure why it felt like such a betrayal, but you always thought Wade would have had your back. Why didn't he track you down and warn you? Why had no one just given you some kind of heads up that you would be completely ousted from the life you had built for yourself with Logan? 

"Sure do, baby bird," Wade confirmed with a quick nod of his head. There was something off in his tone. This didn't feel like the same Wade you had come to know and reluctantly love. This almost felt like a stranger wearing a Wade mask. "I was there when she showed up. Just walked right out of that portal and into Logan's arms like she hasn't been dead for the past who knows how long." 

You hated that you could picture that perfectly, as if Wade's memory was playing out in your head.  

"Yeah, well, it looks like I'm not needed anymore now that he has who he really wants." You felt like an idiot for ever thinking you were more than just a placeholder for Logan's wife. You didn't want to cry in front of Wade, but you could feel the sting of tears in your eyes.  

Wade tilted his head to the side, watching you with an intensity that was almost unnerving. "So, what are you gonna do now?" 

"Can I stay here?" You tried, knowing that you couldn't go back to your apartment. You didn't want to ever step foot in there again, knowing that the bright, happy memories you had created were now tainted with misery.  

Wade brought his foot back, kicking the door to his apartment open enough for you to see Vanessa seated at the table. "No can do," Wade answered with a wince. "You see, I'm trying to win her back over and I'm already sharing a one bedroom apartment with Blind Al, so it's a little cramped around here. But hey, if you join the X-Men, it usually comes with free room and board. They'll take anyone," he got out on a laugh, before he waved his hand. "Well, except for me. You shoot one person," he lamented, shaking his head in disappointment. "Or, hey, I hear Love Island is casting. Might be time to find you a new boo." 

"So," you started, trying to reconcile the fact that you no longer had a home with Logan and now you couldn't find one either with Wade. "I can't stay here," you said, and it was no longer a question, it was just a fact of your new lonely, pathetic existence. 

There was something so off about everything that had happened that day and you were trying to make sense of all of it. You had just spent the night before making a special dinner for your family and now you didn't even have one.  

Everything was happening so fast that you felt like you weren’t even really processing it. Why hadn’t you just stayed at the apartment and fought for Logan? This was your life. Your home, your family, your love. Why were you just giving it all up so easily? You didn’t understand, but now you weren’t even sure you would be able to force yourself to go back. 

"No," Wade admitted, with a sheepish grin. "It's not only Vanessa, you see, but Logan. I mean, Deadpool and Wolverine are a package deal now. There's no breaking up that superhero wet dream team and if I'm harboring his ex? Then that'll just make it more awkward than the time I used his toothbrush on Dogpool. Trust me, he made me regret that one. There are some places those claws of his should not go," he warned with a shudder.  

Hearing Wade refer to you as Logan's ex broke something inside you. You could feel hurt begin to overwhelm you, swiftly replaced by anger. You let out a short, sharp scream of frustration. You didn't even realize you had formed a forcefield around you and pushed out with it until you realized Wade had been knocked several steps back.  

"Y/N--" Wade started, but you turned away from him.  

You didn't want to be placated and you didn't want to deal with anymore of Wade's nonsense. You let yourself go invisible, knowing that it was the only way you would feel safe now.  

You wandered around the neighborhood for hours, trying to figure out where you belonged. You trudged from street to street before unerringly finding your way back to your apartment complex once night fell. You didn't dare go inside, but you stayed out on the sidewalk. People passed by you, never knowing you were even there, and you kept your gaze up on the window that shone brightest in the dark.  

Logan was up there. He was with his wife and Laura and they were a family in their home enjoying a night together. You were no one with nothing and no home to share with anyone. 

You weren't sure why you stayed there for so long, but you thought it had something to do with hope and an inane wish that he would come downstairs and tell you it was all some sick joke. You thought of his promise that he would always find you, even when you were hidden, but that hadn't been true either.  

Logan was happy without you, because he had what he really wanted all along. So, why would he come find you when he didn't even need you anymore? 

Or worse, Logan knew you were down here and just didn't care about you anymore.  

With that revelation, you turned and walked away. There was a swirling mess of thoughts stuck in your head that dredged up the same old insecurities you thought you had shed once and for all.  

You would never be good enough. You were unloved. You didn't matter. You weren't worth anything. 

You had no one.  

You felt tears slide down your cheeks as you aimlessly roamed from place to place. You next found yourself outside the X-Mansion, wondering if you should take Wade's advice and join up with the X-Men. As much as you longed to feel like you belonged somewhere, you didn't think you could go back to saving people with a smile on your face like you weren't slowly withering inside.  

There was a whisper of your name on the air. You glanced over your shoulder, looking to see who called your name, but you found no one. It had been so faint that you might have imagined it, but there was a feeling, an electrified touch, that had briefly set your nerves alight.  

You weren't sure what time it was, but you were exhausted. You found it pathetic and sad that you didn't have anywhere to go. You didn't even have money for a hotel room. All you could think to do was find a park and drop down onto a bench. At the very least, you knew you could protect yourself if anyone tried to attack you.  

You formed a forcefield around you, ignoring the fact that it would only slip away while you slept, and let yourself drift away.  

When you woke, you weren't alone. You jolted in place, suddenly wide awake, and scrambled to sit up. On the bench across from yours, a man was sitting reading a newspaper.  

He quirked an eyebrow at you when he realized he had your attention.  

"I was wondering when you would wake up," he said, lowering the newspaper.  

He had dark eyes and darker hair. He wore a suit with a black trench coat, but the illusion of a businessman was ruined by the combat boots he was wearing. His skin was pale and there was a faint ring of red around his eyes that had you wondering if he was wearing makeup. His appearance, oddly enough, seemed false, but the grin on his face was genuine, if a bit unsettling.  

"Were you watching me?" You couldn't help but wonder, half-torn between becoming invisible to make your escape and staying to get answers.  

"Yes," he answered, unashamed by his actions. "I thought it fascinating that someone would let you stay out here all alone. You don't deserve that, so I stayed to keep watch over you." 

You wanted to tell him you could take care of yourself, but you didn't feel so sure about that anymore. The reminder of your loneliness crept up on you and you could feel doubt settle over you. You were on your own now without a team. No one was going to come save you if you found yourself in trouble. You would simply have to claw your own way out.  

"What's your name?" You decided to ask instead, studying him from across the small concrete path that separated you.  

"Nathaniel," he introduced himself with a smile. "And you are?" 

"Y/N," you returned, with a half-hearted wave.  

"Now, I know we just met, but I do have one thing on my mind," Nathaniel started, leaning in towards you after placing his newspaper on the bench beside him. "What on earth are you doing out here all by yourself?" 

You felt your lips twist to the side in a frown as you bit down on the side of your mouth to keep a lid on the emotions that threatened to boil over at the reminder of the previous day. "I--," you cut yourself off, not sure how to phrase your situation to a stranger without making it seem as if you had completely lost your mind. "I lost my home yesterday," you settled on with a grimace. "My family kicked me out." 

Nathaniel made a sympathetic noise before he stood up. "May I?" He asked, gesturing towards your bench. 

You shrugged your shoulders in answer but moved over to leave him enough space to sit down beside you.  

"In my experience, family is a fickle thing," Nathaniel continued once he was at your side. "People come and go, but you have to be able to stand by yourself and forge your own path once it all falls apart." 

"I don't know if I can do that this time," you whispered, ashamed to admit that you were on the brink of losing whatever control over your emotions you had managed since waking up.  

Nathaniel turned so he could watch you. It was a bit unnerving, but you figured you had no one else for company. A smirk tugged at his lips as he studied you. "You're a fighter," he assured you.  

"Oh?" You wondered, returning his stare. "And how would you know that?" 

His smirk was still in place as he tapped his temple. "I'm psychic," he proclaimed, holding up his fingers and waving them before imitating a ghostly wail.  

You couldn't help the laugh that escaped you and it felt so wrong.  

"There we go," Nathaniel murmured with a pleased smile. "Look, I know you don't know me, but how about a drink? Coffee?" He prompted, moving to stand and holding out a hand to you.  

You didn't want to wallow in your misery on the park bench all by yourself and you figured Nathaniel made a decent enough distraction. "You're paying," you told him, reluctantly grabbing his hand and letting him help you up. "Only because I don't have any money." 

Nathaniel laughed, the sound briefly jarring to you, and cocked his head to the side. "In that case, I'll buy you breakfast too." 

You found yourself in a diner booth sitting across from Nathaniel. He offered to buy you whatever you wanted, but you settled for a cup of coffee and a stack of pancakes. You weren't all that hungry and you couldn't get your mind off Logan. You wondered what he was doing right at that moment and then you dashed the thought. He was probably happy with his wife and Laura and had forgotten all about you.  

"Hey," Nathaniel called, getting your attention. "Where did you go?" 

You shook your head, biting your lip to distract yourself.  

"Thinking about your family?" He prompted, shooting you a wary look. "I know I'm a stranger and it's none of my business, but do you want to tell me what happened? Maybe I can offer some perspective." 

You scowled down at your pancakes, pushing them halfheartedly around the plate with a fork. You glanced around the diner, spotting a blonde woman wearing a white suit watching you curiously from a booth not far from yours. You shook your head at Nathaniel, not wanting anyone to overhear you.  

"Let's get out of here," you told him, pushing yourself out of the booth. "I could use a walk to clear my head." 

"Alright," Nathaniel readily agreed, standing as well. While he placed a twenty on the table, you made for the door.  

There was that whisper again in the air that had you looking over your shoulder. Someone was calling your name, but you didn't see anyone you recognized. No one was even looking at you except for Nathaniel who was slowly approaching you.  

"You okay?" Nathaniel interrupted, stealing your attention away.  

"Yeah," you muttered, briefly nodding your head. "Just c'mon," you said, barely waiting for Nathaniel to follow you before you pushed through the door and walked outside.  

You didn't think you would be able to confide in a total stranger, but there was something strangely freeing about unloading all the burdens on your mind to someone who didn't know anything about you. You even managed to drop the mutant bomb on him and were surprised when Nathaniel only took it in stride, as if he had expected all along you weren’t quite normal. He mostly seemed focused on what you told him about your family and how you lost them all in one fell swoop.  

"Sounds like you're better off without them," Nathaniel mused. "Anyone who would let you go like that is an idiot." 

"Maybe," you begrudgingly agreed. You didn't think it was possible, but Nathaniel had managed to make you feel better. Maybe letting out all your worries had briefly unburdened you. Or maybe since you lost everyone, you had been desperate to hear someone tell you it wasn’t your fault.  

"They're all ungrateful idiots," Nathaniel continued. "You're special," he told you. "And you deserve more." 

His tone brooked no argument, but you were a little thrown off by how serious he seemed.  

"I don't know what I'm going to do now," you deflected, scowling down at your hands. "I don't have anyone or anywhere to go. And I've just spent the day with a stranger telling him my whole pathetic sob story." 

"I'm not a stranger anymore," Nathaniel offered with a grin. "You know my name and everything." 

"I know literally nothing else about you," you pointed out. You were starting to feel apprehensive about trusting someone you didn't even know. Your head was beginning to hurt and you could feel your hands trembling. You weren't sure why panic had hit you all at once, but you could feel your heart beating overtime in your chest and a cold sweat begin to break out along your skin. You were beginning to hyperventilate, confused and overwhelmed, when Nathaniel took you by the shoulders and forced you to look into his eyes.  

"Hey, it's all going to be okay. Just trust me, alright? Y/N, you with me?"  

You tried to focus on Nathaniel, but there was a ringing in your ears and you swore someone else was trying to get your attention. You shook your head, trying to keep yourself from falling right into a spiral. You forced yourself to take slow, deep breaths, realizing that Nathaniel was also taking them, trying to coach you through your anxiety attack.  

You closed your eyes once you finally felt like you could stand on your own two feet without freaking out. You took a moment to center yourself before allowing yourself to open your eyes again.  

"Thanks," you whispered, nodding at him when he shot you a skeptical look. "I'm fine. I'll be fine," you claimed, even though you knew it was a lie. You were tired of loving and losing. Your heart ached for Logan and you knew that you would never recover from losing him. But Nathaniel, odd as he was, had managed to help you feel like maybe you didn't have to spend the rest of your existence completely alone.  

"I know you will," Nathaniel confirmed with another one of his smiles. "Because you're coming home with me." 

You stared at Nathaniel, waiting for the punchline, but it never came. "I could be a serial killer," you warned him with a scoff. "And you're inviting me into your home?" 

Nathaniel shrugged his shoulders, a smirk on his face. "I'm not scared of you." 

He sounded so sure of himself that you couldn't help the disbelieving laugh that escaped you. "You're completely insane, aren't you?" 

"So, is that a yes?" Nathaniel wondered, holding his hand out to you and waiting for you to take it. "Will you join me?" 

You stared down at his hand for a beat too long to be socially acceptable. It felt like you were about to make a deal with the devil, but Nathaniel had been nothing but kind. He had given you a shoulder to cry on and was now giving you a place to go so you wouldn’t have to spend another night on a park bench. 

You knew it was probably a bad idea, but you still found yourself reaching out to take his hand.  

"Okay," you reluctantly agreed. "I'll go with you." 

You thought it would be weird once you found yourself in Nathaniel's apartment, but it felt oddly familiar. He had a guest room that he had designated as yours and made sure you could take whatever you wanted from the fridge. You didn't know how to return his kindness, but you knew you would have to find a way.  

Nathaniel had gone out to get dinner while you waited on his couch, idly flipping through channels. You were starting to doze off, exhausted, when you heard someone calling for you.  

You squinted at the television, wondering if you were hearing things, when it happened again. You had stopped on a news report, catching sight of the woman from the diner. You assumed she was a news anchor, but the way she was looking at the camera gave you the eerie sensation that she was somehow actually watching you. When her gaze drifted over, as if looking at someone behind you, you rushed to turn off the television. 

You cautiously glanced over your shoulder, half-expecting to see someone standing there. But you were alone.  

 “Y/N,” the voice called again. It was faint, like they were outside, but close enough for you to hear.  

“What the fuck is happening?” You growled, growing frustrated. “Where are you?” 

You stood, wondering if you should go looking for whoever was trying to reach you, when Nathaniel walked into the apartment. He held up the bag of takeout and nodded towards the kitchen table.  

"Ready to eat?" 

Time dragged on as days and weeks passed. You still thought of Logan practically every waking moment, but Nathaniel had done his best to distract you.  

You were grateful for him, because you didn't know how you would have lived without someone there to fill the void in your life.  

You weren't sure what day it was or even how long had passed since you last saw Logan, but you knew that you had started to heal.  

"Sometimes," Nathaniel told you once you voiced that thought to him. "You have to let something break so you can piece it back together to get something new. To get what you truly want. What is it that you want, Y/N?" Nathaniel studied you with the same unnerving intensity he always did and you hated to admit that you were finding it less weird each time it happened.  

Logan was the first thought that came to your mind. You wanted Logan and you wanted your home and you wanted your family. You wanted to show Laura how to cook and you wanted to follow Wade into crazy situations, knowing that he would have your back just like you had his back. You wanted to crawl into bed with Logan at the end of each day knowing that you were wanted and cherished.  

Nathaniel made a disappointed noise before he shook his head. "There's no going back," he told you "I'm sorry, but it's just not going to happen." 

You didn't like the way he sounded so sure of himself. Nathaniel didn't know Logan and he didn't even really know you. You had spent weeks with him, but years of your life had been devoted to a Logan. Your Logan had been better, you knew it, so maybe you were the one who wasn't worthy.  

Nathaniel made a tsking noise before he reached out. He wrapped his hand lightly along the underside of your jaw, his thumb pressed to the other side of your neck over your pulse point. He considered you for a long moment, as if he was searching for something.  

"He left you," Nathaniel reminded you, as if it hadn't been eating you up inside since it happened. "You are special. You deserve to be cherished," he continued, and you started to worry about the potentially romantic direction he was going with his lecture. A brief smile flitted across his face, as if he could read your mind, before his expression slipped back towards something more serious. "You're lost and you're broken," he added, gently sweeping his thumb over your pulse point. "Let me put the pieces back together." 

You weren't even sure if you trusted Nathaniel, but you had spent so long hurting that you were tempted to say yes.  

You suddenly felt like someone had brushed their hand over the back of your head and you heard someone call your name. It was the same voice as before and you knew better than to look for someone you wouldn't find. But Nathaniel's eyes strayed just over your shoulder, as if he had heard it too. There was a brief flicker of irritation on his face before he gifted you with a sincere smile.  

"I've got you," he promised. "No one is ever going to get near you again." 

"Okay," you finally agreed, if only because you were curious about what he had in mind. You also couldn't deny that you were just so desperate to not fall back into that desolate pit of isolation you had begun to dig for yourself. Nathaniel saw you and he wanted you. There wasn't much else you felt like you could ask for now.  

And if Nathaniel's sharp smile sent a shiver through you for all the wrong reasons, then you were the only one who had to know about that.  

Nathaniel seemed insistent that in order to move on, you would have to make yourself stronger. To him, that seemed to mean training day and night, improving upon your power in new and terrifying ways.  

You spent hours, days, weeks, stretching the limits of your power. Your power had always been meant as a defense, to protect and contain, but now you wanted to wield it as a weapon.  

Your progress felt excruciatingly slow, but you had to admit that you were pleased with the results. It started simple enough with just a thought. You wanted your forcefields to hurt. The barriers you would have erected to protect yourself should also be used to hurt anyone who dared get too close.   

Nathaniel had rented out an abandoned location in a strip mall and set up targets for you to use. More often than not, he was watching you, as if he was waiting for something. Other times, he seemed content to leave you alone, trusting you would have something new to show him when he returned.  

You practiced on the targets, first forming forcefields around your fists and breaking anything that stood in your way. Nothing held up to them and you started growing bored of that tactic. You started to think that if you could form a forcefield, then it could be any shape you wanted. Spikes, swords, knives all began to adorn the edges of your forcefields, facing out and ready to maim anything that was in the way.  

Nathaniel seemed eager when you first formed a forcefield that was outlined with spikes and used it to repeatedly stab holes into the brick fence that lined the back of the property. You were sure he was never going to get his deposit back, but he didn't even seem to care. He only encouraged you to think bigger and do more.  

With time, you were even able to produce two forcefields at once. It was exhausting and drained all your energy, but you liked the idea of protecting yourself while also using a different forcefield to hurt an attacker. From there, it was only natural to think of taking a forcefield, forming it around an enemy, and turning the projected spikes inward, letting them impale your target without a way to escape.  

You felt stronger and invulnerable. You had never thought to test your power like this, and the feeling was nearly intoxicating. Logan and Laura and Wade were still on your mind, but now you knew that you didn’t need them. Like Nathaniel told you, you could stand on your own and forge your own path ahead.  

No one would hold you back now.  

The first time you felt the full force of your own power was when Nathaniel was taunting you into a reaction.  

"He doesn't care about you anymore. He's moved on with the true love of his life and you are nothing to him. You don't need him anymore. You can show him that you're better off without him." 

There were targets surrounding you, but you didn't care about them. All you could think about was Logan and the stupid lovelorn look on his face as he looked at his wife. He looked like he had been saved. Saved from you and whatever pathetic existence he was ready to settle for in her absence. You deserved better and you wanted to rip that stupid look right off his face. You wanted to make him and her regret it.  

You let out a scream of frustration, punching out with your forcefield at one of the targets, but it got carried away from you. All the targets snapped back, taken out at once from the blast. It carried farther out, nearly ripping the door off its hinges and shattering the front windows.  

You looked at Nathaniel, where he was splayed on the floor, staring up at you in awe.  

"You did it," he praised as he began to push himself to his feet. You crossed over towards him, holding out your hand to help get him up off the floor. “I knew you could do it.” 

"What was that?" You wondered, breathless and ecstatic. Your power had never quite felt like that before. You wanted to try it again, the rush of it addicting. If you could hone that and strengthen it, then you could use it on multiple enemies at once. You could become nearly unstoppable.   

"A repulsion field," Nathaniel answered, reaching out to rest a hand on your shoulder. "With time, I expect you'll be able to direct it and control it. You’ll be able to take out a whole city if you want." 

"Shit," you breathed, still shocked that you had managed something like that. "I didn't think I could use my power in that way. It was...exciting," you decided with a grin at Nathaniel.  

"I told you that you're special," he reminded you. "I knew you had that in you all along." 

"Thank you," you found yourself saying. You considered the targets on the floor and wondered if there would be any more use in them.  

"I have extras," Nathaniel assured you. "Want to try again?" 

You felt a pleased little thrill shoot through you at the thought. "Fuck yes," you answered.  

A week passed since you found out about the extra perk your power allowed you. You felt more confident and assured of yourself. Gone was the self-doubt and in its place was a feeling that you could defeat anyone or anything.  

You were walking to the store with Nathaniel, thinking about what you might want to make for dinner. Nathaniel was being unusually quiet and leaving you alone to your thoughts. You wondered if something was wrong, but then you spotted her.  

It was you. The other you. She was alone. No Logan or Laura or Wade in her vicinity.  

You couldn't help the way you froze on the sidewalk or the fury that rose up swiftly enough you felt nearly sick with it.  

She was to blame for everything. She had stolen your life away from you and now she got to be happy while you spent the rest of your life wanting someone you would never have again.  

"Is that her?" Nathaniel asked, rounding back to standing at your side. "The one who stole your life from you?" 

You nodded your head, attempting to keep a lid on your anger.  

"Why don't you make her regret it?" 

The idea was so simple, but so damn tempting. You could just imagine the look on her face when she realized she was incredibly outmatched now. You could destroy her within seconds and she would never be able to stop you. 

You knew it wasn't something you should entertain. You had lived your whole life as a hero. There was a line you would have never dared to cross before but after everything that had happened, you were starting to realize that line was blurred beyond recognition. As far as you were concerned, she had stolen your life from you, and it was only right that she realized what a mistake that had been.  

"You're better than her now. Stronger," Nathaniel continued, leaning in closer to you. "She can't do half of what you can. Show her what you've learned." 

"I don't know," you tried to deflect. You wanted your revenge, but there was still a tiny voice in your head saying it wasn’t right. It wasn’t what you were supposed to do. 

"Aren't you tired?" Nathaniel hissed, his hand coming up to clutch your shoulder in a near-painful grip. "Tired of being the doormat. The hero. The martyr. Don't let them get away with it. Don't let her walk away." 

You didn't even realize you had made up your mind until you were walking up to the other you. She was checking out a display of plants that had been left outside of the market for customers to choose, but she seemed to sense your approach, because she turned to consider you.  

You weren't sure what she saw when she looked at you, but her eyes went wide with fear, and she immediately pulled up a forcefield. You stalked forward, intent on your target. You didn't care if anyone was watching, because you felt like you were completely justified in your actions.  

You passed right through her forcefield and pushed her back. She fell to the ground, staring up at you in terror. You pulled your fist back, forming your own forcefield around it. You let spikes form along the outside facing towards her. All you had to do was bring it down onto her face. It would be a killing blow, and you would never have to think about her again. Logan would lose the love of his life, but maybe he would come back to you. Maybe you could return to him stronger, better, and without any more competition.  

For a moment, as you looked right into her face, it was like gazing into a mirror. The scar was gone, her hair was the same as yours, and you were wearing similar clothes. She looked just like you.  

You were convinced that she was you.  

And that made you pull back, horrified at what you had almost done.  

Her eyes were closed, ready for a blow that you weren't capable of dealing any longer.  

"I'm sorry," you whispered before stepping away, propelling yourself right out of her forcefield.  

"Y/N?" Nathaniel called, pulling your attention towards him. "What are you doing? She's right there. Kill her," he demanded, his lips pulling back in a sneer.  

You shook your head, feeling something indescribable but ultimately terrified swell within you. What had you become? What had Nathaniel done to you? You had let him so far into your head that you had almost done something unspeakable.  

You made yourself go invisible before you took off running. You didn't know where you were going or where you would even hide, but you knew that you needed to get away from Nathaniel. He had pushed you to do more, be more, and you had never once stopped to think about which road you were heading down and whether it would lead you right to the point of no return.  

You could hear Nathaniel yelling for you to stop and come back, but you didn't listen. You wanted to get away from him and just think. It felt like you had let him take up residence in your head and now you wanted to figure out how the hell to evict him.  

You ran until you felt like you were going to collapse. You finally stopped outside of a library. You rushed inside, catching a glimpse of the news anchor flipping through a book as you went right for the back corner.  Two bookshelves met there and you sank right to the floor in front of them. You dropped your head into your hands and forced yourself to take deep breaths.  

"Y/N," you heard someone call. It wasn't Nathaniel and it wasn't anyone else you immediately recognized. But it was familiar. They had been trying to get your attention all along.  

"What," you snapped, already feeling like you were on the verge of crumbling. Nathaniel had been right that you were broken, but who was going to put the pieces back together this time? It felt like Nathaniel had managed to piece them back together all wrong and you didn't even feel like yourself anymore.  

"Y/N," the voice called again.  

You closed your eyes and focused on the voice. You reached out for it, desperate for any sort of lifeline. It was a spark right at the back of your mind. You rushed to meet it, eager to figure out who had been trying to talk to you.  

"My name is Charles Xavier."  

You startled, nearly letting the tenuous connection between you and Charles drop, but finally throwing everything you had towards it.  

"This world is a lie," Charles continued once he realized you could hear him. "Do not let him break you. They're coming to find you." 

"Who?" You couldn't help but ask, hope and fear clashing inside you, threatening to overwhelm you.  

"A rather odd group of saviors," Charles answered, a hint of amusement clear in his words. "But stay strong and do what you can to break free of his hold. He has a way to keep me out, so once he finds you, I’m afraid I won’t be much help to you. Just hold on until they get there." 

You didn't know how you were going to get yourself out. You were starting to think it was hopeless, because you hadn’t even realized you were trapped in the first place. The more you thought about it, though, the more obvious it became that something had been wrong since the morning you woke up and Logan’s wife was sitting in your kitchen. The fact that she had come back from the dead, Logan’s quick dismissal of you, Laura and Wade both turning their backs on you. Nathaniel’s convenient timing and the way he watched you as if you were nothing more than an experiment for him. A pet mutant he could poke and prod and play with while you were none the wiser.   

“Who’s coming to find me?” You didn’t dare to assume that you were worth the rescue, but you couldn’t help yourself. You had to know. You had to hold onto the one little spark of hope you could feel burning defiantly inside you.  

For one terrifying moment, your mind was still, and you felt crushingly alone. Just when you thought you had been abandoned, Charles left you with one final word.  

"Logan." 

Author's Note: There will be a fourth chapter! Did I have you going for a while there? I felt so evil writing this. I truly did. If you liked this, please let me know. Not to sound needy, but comments/reblogs/etc. literally fuel me to write more and inspire me so much to keep coming up with fun stuff. Thank you to everyone who has shown this series any support! Also, if you would like to be added/removed from the taglist, just let me know!

Taglist: @wonderfrost @mrsyixingunicorn10 @blackbleedingrose @arrozyfrijoles23 @elianamarie-blog

@sarahskywalker-amidala @whiskytoast @shizzybarnaclee @zbeez-outlet @halepack2011

@facelessfionna @i-left-my-cat-on-the-stove @whyam1heree @serendippindots @janilovecookies

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@astudyoftimeywimeystuff

[starscreambbymama]

There's something that's so gross Sarah J Maas writes how the three flying mole rats with wings view the Illyrians in her books that either her stans vehemently ignore or outright wish not to acknowledge.

1. Rhysand-He doesn't care about his Illyrian side yet only when it will benefit him in the long run in order to get what he wants in the end. He doesn't respect the illyrians let alone who they are as individuals yet what they can provide for him. He acknowledges the illyrians strength but not in a way of respect but what that strength can do for him and his court only. He is 100% okay knowing that his wife has physically changed her body to have an Illyrian woman's anatomy on when it benefits her, knowing that the wind clipping is still an ongoing problem. Knowing that the Illyrian women and girls are being bodily harmed from this practice. Sure you can argue and play devil's advocate that Rhysand has told the Illyrians to stop the wing clipping but what are the consequences? What consequences has he put in place that tells the Illyrians "I do not stand for this. My court does not stand for this. Not now or ever. And if you continue these are the consequences" but he won't do that, he'd much rather say that he wants change and yet will not get the ball rolling and get the job done and just do the bare minimum and wipe his hands of the problem.

2. Cassian & Azriel-Both of these two characters, unlike Rhysand are both full Illyrian. Yet Azriel vehemently detests his own race due to his own childhood trauma, even extending that hate to Illyrians that he doesn't even know that well due to said traume resulting in creating his own generalization, prejudice and internalized racism of the same group he was born from. Azriel has made it completely clear he doesn't give two single shits about Illyria and would rather anyone that is Illyrian (save for Rhysand and Cassian) to be completely wiped out on the face of Prythian. Cassian himself while being proud to be Illyrian is so blindly faithful to the same person who allows Illyria to be the way that it is now. Just as Rhysand he talks up and down about how he hates the wing clipping (the equivalency of genital mutilation toward girls and women in real life). While both he, Azriel (even though it's contradictory for him to care give his detest for the Illyrians) and Rhysand advocate to have the Illyrian women trained in combat, I ask how does this help the situation? The wing clipping is still gonna happen regardless given the fact there aren't any consequences set up if the act continues. The Illyrian women are expected to do jobs such as the cooking, cleaning,making the clothes, doing the laundry, giving birth to children and tending to the children. And with what we know, Illyrian men aren't okay with Illyrian women or their wives training whatsoever and they wouldn't really have a say in it either so the wives are ruled out. In addition to the act their wings are clipped and basically useless given the fact Illyrian wings are used during combat as well. So it only leaves left for the only that qualify to be Illyrian girls who haven't gotten their first period yet. From the book it states that Rhysand's mother didn't have her's until she was 18 due to restricting her diet from the clipping happening. And Mor had her period around the time that she was 17 so we can chalk up to Illyrian girls getting their period around 17 and the age range for the Illyrians to begin training is about 8-9. So I'm guessing the age range would be 8-16 years old and stop there. Also, going back to the point of the tasks the Illyrian girls have to do strenuous activities day by day on top of having to go an do training when they're done. They're going to be tired and exhausted after doing all of that. Also, what if the illyrians girls don't want to train? What if they want to do other things like poetry, painting, playing an instrument, dancing, fishing, riding horses, swimming, making flower chains, flying, reading, archery, pottery, playing, whatever they want to do? What about their choices? The training isn't a solution that the Illyrian women and girls want, it's a solution that Rhysand, Cassian and Azriel think tat they would want. And yet these three are considered the "good ones" out of all the Illyrians by the author and the fandom makes me sick. Yet of course it is this way given the fact SJM has written an entire group and put them in a box with a culture that defines them as being violent, barbaric, misogynists that only view their women as breeding stock.

[the-exiled-comic]

have u ever done a post about crowstar and her thought process behind everything? srry if i missed it and u already did one (u dont have to answer this if so!) but i love her as someone who only feels remorse once it starts effecting her child and the moment to make it right is long past, but then starclan didnt give her the grace that they gave autumnstar and shes got that curse yo rlly interesting stubborn til death character i need in her brain

crowbar post... for me? :pleading: i might have talked about her in the past but i have no idea where i say things

despite me reminding ppl shes been deserving this lately she is one of my fave characters to write. "its too late to make it right" is pretty key to her character ya, i'll add more under the cut

crowstar has a lot of sympathetic qualities to me but like she does a lot of wrong things and knows that they are wrong. so i dont consider her a tragic villain in the same sense that firespots is, bc he's just extremely off the deep end. he's in a bunch of shit he truly did not start aggravating until like poking at treeclan and murdering cloverfall. in like a technical sense you can say it started with the rebellion bc i think he jumped the gun and went in under prepared but its different to me. but anyway this isnt about boy... we are going to talk about girl...

if we start from the very beginning, she's like a jealous mean girl kid. she has some unresolved issues with her family, her sister nightstride is older than her and actually knows her dad but crow doesn't know her own. so she projects onto autumnstar as a father figure and doesn't really like that firespots doesn't like his dad. she would be a good daughter, it would be so easy for her to be a good daughter! why is firepaw such a bad son!?

she's then groomed into being a kind of protege for autumnstar, she loves the attention but this sort of isolates her from her peers at a young age. she's the bratty teacher's pet that no one really gets along with crow goes on to date fallensnow and this is weird for her, affection for someone who isn't her family? for the first time? and then she gets burned by the fact he's avoidant and probably doesn't even like women (i could go on a tangent about fallensnows sexuality but this is not the post for it LMAO) so he leaves and shes like geeze!! that the only thing i ever loved! autumnstar explodes and shes leader now, her ex tries to kill her and then she has a little baby boy... theres also no more autumnstar around to be like "yeeeup start training that boy for war" so she just tries to raise him with a lot of love

and you see now how thats been backfiring as fallenscar is a super sheltered adult who has little grasp on reality. she lied to him about what exactly went down with the rebellion. killed a child for "attacking" him. told him about her curse which in turn made him have questionable faith in starclan (this hasnt really come into play just yet but it will soon, trust). made him deputy and then died before he could ever truly prepare himself for the world. good intentions, a lot of love... but that's just not really enough

and the curse. crowstar just fixated on the fact its not fair, why didnt this happen to autumnstar? is starclan misogynistic? more at 11 if this solved any problems... debatable. starclan stuff will get answered later in the story

crowstar to me is like. pitiable. she made too many enemies, didn't grow up in a place that fostered change, and then took over and didn't try to amend that until it was way too late. and the enemies.

now.. crowstar likes male attention. she is a straight woman i am sorry ;^; to me she is one of those people who cant make friends with anyone she sees as competition for this. she started off negatively with firespots and whisperleaf out of her love for autumnstar and fallensnow respectively. and she probably did not like that the men in her age group liked other girls. she did not like that her sister had all the amiable relationships. she's very jealous by nature and it hurt so much of her friendships

i like her and enjoy writing her but goddamn she is a plethora of unlikeable traits- some of which are things only I know as her creator- but it still surprised me that a lot of people like her. im glad you all do!

i know i said i dont view her as tragic but like the last few days of her life are a little tragic in the sense she IS realising just how badly she fucked up and theres not a lot of things she can do to fix it. she knows her baby boy is going to suffer greatly for this and all she can do is say sorry and tell him to be strong, shes out of options because she took too long. learning that yeah actually being a tyrant ruined her life

my fave way to write villains... their final moments are of anguish about their life choices :) except autumnstar hes just having a good time i dont think hes self reflected literally ever in his life. he thinks hes playing a video game

[aegonsvhagar]

Bastards and Dragons I

𐙚 As you return to Kind's Landing to help defend your brother's claim to Driftmark, you find yourself entangling yourself in old resurfacing feelings.

𐙚 Aemond x Reader (tw: manipulation, incest)

It had been years since you had graced King’s Landing, staying in Dragonstone along with your other siblings, at your mother's behest. The memories of your childhood stung, the castle you had left behind simply just a memory of a different time.

You were not stupid. You knew why Vaemond was questioning Lucerys’s birthright to Driftmark. Everyone did. Although you loved Laenor, you felt a disconnect from him. He was a good father, and tried his hardest to make sure you and your brothers knew comfort and love. But deep down, it didn't feel right.

You hadn't been in Kings Landing for even a day, before you and your brothers found yourselves in the training yard, Jacaerys leading the tour.

"See? I told you this would still be here." he smiles at your youngest brother. "And you thought you could swing Criston’s morning star. And you almost took your own head off."

Lucerys looks around nervously, shrinking into his form.

"What's your problem?" Jacaerys shot Luke a look.

"Everyone’s staring at us." Luke sighs. "No one would question me being heir to Driftmark…if…if I looked more like Ser Laenor Velaryon than Ser Harwin Strong."

"It doesn't matter what they think." you remind him.

Crowds of noise begin to cheer, as you and your brothers turn around to see all the fuss.

You find yourself staring at the man with long silver hair moving between a man you did know, Criston Cole.

Suddenly, the silver haired man turned, and the image of young Aemond was quickly replaced by a dashing prince. Aemond stood tall in the courtyard, keeping his feet moving as he swung his sword against Cole. Fast and quick in his movements, eventually besting the much older knight.

The spectators all clapped, including you and your two brothers.

"Well done, my Prince." Criston nods at Aemond. "You’ll be winning tourneys in no time."

"I don’t give a shit about tourneys." Aemond's eyes find yours, not your brother's. "Nephews…and my darling niece. Have you come to train?"

You hadn't seen your uncle in so long, he had changed from the once quiet and bullied boy that you had known. You once exchanged words with him every so often when able, until your mother had moved you all so abruptly to Dragonstone, cutting off any connection you had formed with the prince.

His eyes focus on you, taking note of how curious you glanced back at him. You had changed. The soft meek girl who hid behind her mother’s skirts was now a beautiful woman, standing before him with an air of interest for him in her.

"It seems time has passed faster than I thought", he remarks with an undertone of mockery.

“I haven't seen you since...the incident at driftmark.” you smile at him, manners always first.

Aemond lets out a dry chuckle at your words, his eye narrowing. "Yes, the issue at Driftmark", he says with a bitter tone, "It seems like yesterday."

The memories of that night were never far from his mind. Every night you were gone, he had thought about how your screams alerted the guards, allowing them to pull apart the bastards that attacked him. You had cupped his face, sobbing as you took his gashed face in. Aemond had gripped your skirts so tight, almost feeling bad for bloodying your nightgown.

“Childhood must’ve been fond at times, no?” you ask, trying to search his eye.

"Fond? I suppose for some, it was...", he huffs, "But for me, you could say it was quite the opposite.”, he adds, his voice bitter as he glances at your brothers briefly before turning his gaze back to you.

You knew Aemond’s childhood hadn't been the best. Thanks to Jacaerys and Aegon’s cruel treatment of him. You remember warning Jacaerys that beaten dogs always bite back, completely sure that the incident at Driftmark was that: the dog finally biting back.

You look at Jacaerys then back to the prince, “But god you've grown so tall…I remember Aegon being the taller one.”

Aemond can't help but smile at that. It was true, he had grown considerably since he was younger, and he was now taller than Aegon. Giving him some power trip over the other man.

"Indeed, I have", he says with a smile. "I grew far more than my brother did".

“And what a fighter you have become.” Lucerys speaks up.

“Quite the fighter? And what do you know of Knights, boy?” Aemond questions the smaller one, who shrinks at his crueler tone used for him.

“Nothing. Lucerys knows nothing, but he is to learn, is he not? If he is going to be the heir to Driftmark.” you try to ease the tension you can feel building up.

Aemond laughs at the mention of Lucerys being the heir to Driftmark. "Yes, the little bastard shall be the Lord of Driftmark…” Aemond turns to look at your brother. "Though I wonder if he's truly worthy of such a title.”

“Aemond.” you say with a mixture of disgust and shock.

You weren't stupid, very obviously aware of you and your brother’s brown soft locks instead of the traditional silver hair Targaryen’s donned. But your mother had explained sometimes it wasn't the promised color, evident of Rhaenys’s brown hair.

Aemond merely smiles at your reaction.

"Oh, come now…” he says, his tone mocking. "Surely you know the truth. Lucerys is a bastard, and he has no right to claim Driftmark.”

“Then that makes me a bastard as well, does it not?” you are quick to defend your brother to his words.

The prince only glances at you before leaning close into your ear to whisper, "Yes, I suppose it does. But tell me, have you ever felt anything akin to jealousy knowing that you are to be nothing more than a mere bastard, while your younger brother will be lord of the tides? And your other one, heir to the iron throne? You could be so much more, if the opportunity would arise.”

✮⋆˙

“Mother?” you are quick to enter her chambers.

Rhaenyra looks up at you, at her feet Viserys and Aegon play. “Yes my love?”

“I ran into Aemond earlier, training with Cole..” you say, sitting beside her on the velvet chair.

“Oh you did, did you?” Rhaenyra’s face turns, not liking the idea of you with her brother. She quickly glances up at you, reading your face almost immediately. “What is it?”

“Mother, he called us bastards. For all of the training yard to see and hear."

“He did what?” she looks concerned.

“Mother, he said that Luke wouldn't inherit Driftmark, because he is a bastard. And that he's not worthy of it, like Jace isnt of the throne…” you sigh at your words. “That I would seek nothing, because I am a bastard.”

Your mother’s face softens a bit. She would never allow any harm to befall her children, she’d rather die. “Hey.” she soothes. “My sweet, do not listen to him, for he speaks lies. You are not a bastard, you are my daughter and you are everything. Do not ever forget that, hm?”

Tears form in your eyes. “I am not stupid mother. I see the way Queen Alicent looks at me, and has looked at all three of us for years. How the court sneers behind our backs for the color of our hair.”

Rhaenyra’s heart aches once again, as she reaches out, she tilts your chin up. “Do not listen to them, my love.” she speaks softly. Rhaenyra would not allow your innocence to be taken from you at such a young age. “You know the truth…you are my daughter, my beautiful girl. No one can argue that.”

“Is that why Vaemond is questioning Luke as heir?” you ask.

Your mother’s hand falls from your face and she sighs, “No my dearest. The truth of it is that he is a greedy and restless second son scorned.”

“Lots of theatrics for a second son.”

Rhaenyra gives you a small smile, “It’s the height of ambition, is it not? And foolishness.”

“Where is Daemon?” you ask as you glance around her empty chambers.

Rhaenyra pauses for a second, “Why?”

“You shouldn't be alone while we’re here.” you look back to her.

Your mother chuckles softly, cocking her head so slightly. “I’ll be fine, little one.” she assures. “I don’t need him watching me every second of the day.”

“I still don't like you being alone.” you frown, allowing her to pull you into her.

“And why is that hm?” she asks.

“Because I do not trust the queen. Not at all.” you declare.

“You too then, hm?” Rhaenyra laughs slightly. Of course you didn't. It had always worried your mother how much you truly did pick up on. “And why do you not trust her?”

“Because of how she treats us. Treats you.” you point to the scar on Rhaenyra's arm, left by Alicent years ago.

Rhaenyra pauses, recounting how you and your brothers had witnessed that moment. Alicent went mad, stupid enough to bring a knife to the heir of the throne, but to actually cut skin and cause the blood of the dragon to stain the floors, was another act entirely.

“I am so sorry you and your brothers had to witness that. You should have been in your chambers.” her voice is soft.

“Alicent should've died for that...you are the heir to the throne!” you shake your head, voice shaking slightly.

Rhaenyra’s eyes widen, her stomach turns from your words. She places her hands on your face, “Do not say such things.”

“Why not? Are you saying that grandfather allowing her to live was right? That she saw no punishment...no justice, was right?” you stand to your feet, almost upset at what you are hearing.

Rhaenyra stands as well, sighing as she shakes her head. “It does not matter if it was right or not.”

“Yes it does!”

“She-” your mother pauses and takes a deep breath. As if she was choosing her words carefully. “I do not want you thinking or bringing up anything from that night. I am your mother and you are my daughter, I do not wish to hear it come from your mouth. Do I make myself clear?”

“You're defending her.” your eyes widen at the realization. Your mother was defending the very woman who had bullied her for years, tormented you and your brothers with vile gossip and drove you all from your places in King’s Landing.

“I am not-” Rhaenyra huffs in frustration. “I am merely protecting you-”

“You are not protecting me from anything! Do you think when you took Harwin Strong into bed, you'd be protecting us?” you know the words will sting her, but at the moment you are too angry to care.

Rhaenyra looks at you, almost as if you were a stranger in the moment. “You-”

“Everyone knows mother, you can tell by how they stare at us.” your voice is quiet, defeated.

“Darling, look at me.” Rhaenyra demands. “There's my daughter. The one who's kind, smart and fierce. Words have never hurt you before, you shall not let them hurt you now.”

“You don't understand what it's like. When it’s all anyone can see! I am meant to be a Velaryon, yet I am barely that if that at all!” hot tears stream your face, your own frustration growing.

“I don't understand?” Rhaenyra’s voice breaks. “I wouldn't understand? What it’s like to be stared at, to be whispered about as I walk the halls? What do you think happened to me when you were born? Or the years before that?”

“It isn't the same!” you stress. “You are a Targaryen! You have the silver hair! I have the brown hair that shows proof of your-”

“Of my what?” your mother’s face falls.

“Everyone knows…that Harwin Strong is our father.”

Rhaenyra swallows, a look of hurt painting her face. “You should not focus on that. You should focus-”

“On myself, yes. The bastard of the great House Targaryen.” with your last words, you can't help but not stay for the argument that would ensue. You quickly leave her.

✮⋆˙

The door to his chambers stood before you. You knew his chambers by heart because before you were ripped away from King's Landing, they were once your chambers.

You inhale a breath, debating if doing it is really worth it. What answers could he have that your mother was not giving you. Honesty perhaps being one.

You knock slightly on his door. After some footsteps are heard, his door swings open to him standing there. As he takes your image in, his face turns into a mix of surprise and curiosity.

“Aemond. I did not wake you did I?” you ask softly.

“No, you did not.” he shakes his head. “I simply was reading.”

“Can I come in?” you give him a soft smile, hoping he takes note of your kindness.

“Very well.” Aemond stands back, opening his chamber doors to allow you in. “You may enter.”

You enter his chambers and remove your robes, leaving you in your nightdress.

Aemond raises his eyebrow as he closes his chamber door, taking in your form.

“I spoke to my mother earlier today.” you break the silence that hung between you two.

Aemond’s figure leans against one of the stone walls and simply stares at you. “Oh? What about?”

“I know Harwin Strong is my father, but she won't deny yet won’t say the truth plainly.” you look at the ground, refusing to make eye contact as you say the words.

Aemond’s only eye widens.

The rumor of Harwin being you and your brother’s true father was a nasty rumor that had circulated the court for years. Hanging shame on the crown princess, and her children as people whispered whenever they were present. A rumor he know his own mother had begun, backed by a simple ‘Just look at their hair, that is no true Targaryen nor Velaryon’

It was an open secret, nasty gossip. Never confirmed.

Not until now. You stood before him, confirming what your mother tried so hard to keep quiet.

He studies your face for a fleeting moment before speaking, “So it is true then? Harwin Strong is your father?”

You nod as tears begin flooding your face, “He is. Perhaps I always knew, but just wanted to deny it. But as I grow older I cannot. I've come to you because you know what it's like to...not belong where you are supposed to.”

Aemond watches as you wipe your tears, his expression turning soft as he pushes himself off the wall and walks towards you. He knew exactly what you meant. He had been an outsider for years, looking in as Aegon and your brothers relentlessly tortured him.

“I do not know what to do. I feel like I will not fit no matter where I am. Like a broken piece of a glass that cannot be put back.” you sob.

Aemond cups your face, bringing you to look directly at him. And in that moment the shy bastard he once knew flushed away as now all he could see was your gorgeous face, inches away from his.

When did these feelings exist? He felt butterflies as you searched his face.

“I know what it's like…to feel that way,” he admits. “It's an unbearable feeling that threatens to swallow you whole.”

You lean in, “I never hurt you, I couldn't. I knew my brothers were so cruel to you, along with Aegon...I felt so bad.”

“No, you never hurt me sweet girl.” he murmurs. “But you also never stopped them. You were the oldest of your brothers, you should've…”

“I'm sorry!” you cry. “Please do not be mad at me, I cannot have you against me as well.”

“I’m not mad at you.” he assures. “I could never be mad at you. It's just…sometimes your indifference pained me more than their cruelty.”

“I should've said something, told someone. Maybe if I had, you'd still have your eye.” you admit. Not sure you believe your words.

“Perhaps you should have.” Aemond smiles a little, the idea of your empathy towards him over taking the side of your brothers made him feel different towards you. Feelings he had tried so hard to ignore, pouring back in. He shakes his head, “No need to ponder on the painful past. What’s done is done I’m afraid, and we must live with the consequences of our actions.”

You stare at Aemond's lip, desire burning in your eyes, “Did you ever think of me? All of those years?”

Aemond nods at you, of course he thought of you. More than he'd care to admit. "Yes", he answers. “I thought of you. More often than I should have.”

“I thought of you too...would stare out from the balcony of my chambers towards the shores of King’s Landing...missing you.” your years have cleared up now, face inches from his. The tension is too much.

“You missed me?” he asks in disbelief.

“Yes uncle, I missed you.”

Aemond’s breath hitches at the use of the term, something you had called him playfully as children.

‘Yes uncle, coming uncle.’

Aemond’s restraint, all of it that he was holding back so desperately, shatters. He leans in, closing the gap and presses his lips against yours. You immediately react, holding his face just as he holds yours.

You pull back from the kiss, “what did you mean? Earlier you said I could benefit from a situation that would arise...what would you want with a bastard like me?”

Aemond’s expression changes, still caught up in the fact you willingly kissed him back. Something he only dreamed of when he was younger.

He let out a sigh, "Yes, bastard or not, I have desires. Desires that you, as a bastard, could fulfill for me.”

You weren't sure you liked his tone. “And what desires are that?”

He takes in your form again, and takes a deep breath. “Desires better shown than spoken about.”

You didn't know he had felt this way about you. Only a child’s crush that faded only so slightly when you were forced from your home.

“I cannot give you anything, but perhaps children with brown hair I’m afraid...I'm nothing.” you insist, shaking your head.

Aemond sighs dramatically, “Do not speak of yourself like that. You are much more than that whore’s bastard daughter. And as for children? I’ll give you beautiful silver haired boys to dote after.”

“You...you'd give me princes?”

He smiles at you, hands returning to your face. “Yes”, he says firmly. “I would. I'd give you princes and princesses. Legitimate sons and daughters.”

“But I am not your wife, they would be bastards.” you remind him.

His heart aches at the truth of your words, but you were right. You were not his wife. They would be bastards. But you didn't need to be married for them to be conceived.

“Make me your wife.” you whisper. “Take me the way Daemon has taken my mother.”

“The old Valyrian way is a blood oath…you would want that? I thought all princesses dreamed of fancy feasts and wedding ceremonies.” Aemond laughs a little.

“I'm not one for feasts...or for dramatic gatherings of strangers. I know your mother wouldn't allow it, nor would mine. Besides, once married, one of us would have to die for it to be void.”

Aemond’s eyes darken slightly. “Our mothers, at each other’s throats for us and our safety, yet not knowing where our hearts truly lie.”

“So you’ll have me?” you ask, desperate and vulnerable.

“Yes.” he nods. “I’ll have you…in every way.”

You kiss him, it's desperate and almost pathetic. Moaning against his mouth as you try to rid him of his clothes. He groans into the kiss as well, feeling your need for him. The need he's felt for you for years, desperate for this.

He breaks the kiss, breathing heavily. “You're eager aren't you.”

“I’ve needed you since we were younger, Uncle.” you nod.

“And i’ve wanted you.” he begins to shed you of your nightgown. “From the moment you first spoke to me when we were children. I knew you would be my wife, you had to.”

“Take me.” you beg.

“I’ll take you.” he says breathlessly. With one swift movement, he carries you to his sprawling bed.

“I love you, Uncle.” you manage out. The words are surprising, even to you.

Aemond lays you down against the soft blankets, “I love you as well sweet girl. More than I should…more than I intended.”

You kiss him again, reaching for the growing hard on you can visibly see through his pants.

He groans at your touch, growing weak in your hands. “Impatient aren't you?”

“Waited for so long...waited my whole life to be with you!” you tell him.

“I’m here now. I’m yours.” he promises.

He moans at your touch, getting lost in the pure lust of it. “Fuck.”

“Stop teasing me…haven't we both waited enough?” you cry. You wanted him now.

“You want me?” he smirks. “Perhaps I won't hold back.”

“Don't.” you insist.

“Oh you’ll have me. All of me.” he demands. He pins your wrists above your head, covering your body with his.

You both deepen the kiss as he begins to press and roll his body against yours, the small flame inside you flickering. Pure pleasure rattling you.

“You feel good,” he murmurs. “so good.”

He lifts your hips up, pinning you against him, rolling his hips harder. You moan wildly, and desperately. All of these feelings were so new to you, as you imagined they were new to Aemond too.

“Have you done this before?” you ask him.

His face riddles with guilt, and your heart drops slightly.

He nods, “I have.”

“Oh…”

“Aegon…made me. Said it would turn me into a man. It meant nothing.” he insists.

“You laid with a maiden?”

He shakes his head, “A whore.”

Your heart feels better at this. Whores were an easy outlet to the men of Aemond’s kind. You knew that. It meant nothing at the end of the day.

“I’m still…a maiden.” you tell him.

A bastard who was still a virgin.

“How intriguing. I would not have guessed-”

“You think I am a whore?” you scoff.

“No. I know you know better than that…but with your mother leading by example, one must wonder.” he corrects you.

“I wanted to save it…for someone special.” you admit silently.

His eye widened, “You saved it for me?”

Deep down he figured that in all those years, Rhaenyra had married you to your brother, Jace. And that by the time you returned you would have made Rhaenyra a grandmother. To his surprise, you weren't married to him, nor did you bear any of his children. It made him know that you simply were his.

“You did not marry Jace?” he asks.

You shake your head, “I love him, the way a sister loves a brother.”

“And me?” he stares at you.

“I do not love you the way a niece should love an uncle.” you take a sharp breath.

“And how do you love me then?” he lays his forehead against yours.

“The way a wife loves her husband.”

[mika-no-sekai-blog]

Part VIII

Word count: +2300

Warnings: nudity - just joking. Or maybe not. Does drooling over half-naked, training man/men count?

Part VII | Part IX

"Good morning, dears," Viviane merrily shouted as she entered my chambers.

It was early in the morning, the skies still dark, yet I was already awake because I had a hard time sleeping since the encounter with my step-brother - the last of its kind. Several days later, it was still successfully stealing my sleep. Millie had adjusted her schedule to mine and usually accompanied me until the breakfast was ready. I told her that she didn't need to do that, to which she replied that she was an early bird anyway, so it was no problem for her. She was brushing my hair when Viviane invaded my room.

Viviane was in an exceptionally good mood, already prepared for the day, wearing pants hidden beneath a long skirt with several splits, allowing her to move freely if necessary. General's daughter, indeed.

"It's great that you're already up. Are you two ready to have fun?" She clapped her hands, beaming with excitement.

"Ready for what exactly?" I tilted my head to the side.

"For the most exciting moment of every female's life, of course," she flashed a dazzling smile.

Millie behind me began jumping in place, wearing a similar expression. "Do you mean what I think you mean?"

"Exactly that," Viviane confirmed.

I gaped at them, confused. I had no idea what they were talking about.

"Uhm," I cleared my throat, "could someone explain it to me? What's going on?"

"We are going to watch the guards' training," they both said in unison.

My eyes widened. "Wha-?!"

Twenty minutes later, the three of us stood at one of the balcony alcoves overlooking the courtyard near the guard quarters. And we were far from alone. All the alcoves were occupied by females of different statuses, gathered here for only one reason - the half-naked males who trained here. There were so many of them, stretching and flexing their muscular bodies as they did different exercises, wrestled each other or swung practice weapons. The usual smell of winter was overpowered by intoxicating scent of testosterone. Females with flushed cheeks watched the sweat-covered bodies with interest, talking excitedly among themselves, occasionally calling out the males' names which was sometimes rewarded with a flirty grin or wink.

Viviane and Millie conversed in hushed voices, pointing to the different training males, while I stood beside them, looking down at my own hands. I'd never seen so much flesh in my entire life, so naturally I felt embarrassed and didn't know what to do with myself.

"Oh, look! There's Rolland!" Millie beamed, pointing somewhere into the crowd.

Viviane excitedly leaned forward, squinting and frowning in concentration. It took only a moment and her face brightened. "I see him! Look, Y/N!" She tugged on my elbow, pointing to the middle of the group. "There, next to that dark-haired male with broad shoulders and dark tattoos on his back. Do you see him? The one with short almost silver hair, kind of tanned compared to the others. He's sparring right now. He is sooo hot that I would-" She pressed hand to her lips, watching me out of the corner of eye. Her cheeks were flushed "I mean, you know.. he's really sexy."

Embarrassed, I looked in the direction she indicated, easily finding the male she described.

He was young and quite tall, a mass of muscles standing out in the group. I had to admit that there was something attractive about him and the way he moved around with the elegance of dancer. Most of females were apparently here to watch him, his name often echoed in the open space. As Viviane had said, he was sexy and he was well aware of it. Even while sparring, he often looked up at the balcony, flashing a confident grin, winking or waving. Yet his opponent had no chance against him, getting smacked by a wooden stick here and there. The Rolland guy was clearly showing off.

However, there was someone else who attracted my attention even more. I immediately recognized his rather lean but still exceptionally well-built figure in the crowd. He paid no mind to the females, fully focused on the task at hand, precisely guiding every strike of his practice sword with speed and remarkable strength.

Kallias, like the other males, had taken off his shirt, the sweat glittered on his back as he danced around his opponent. His pace was relentless, pushing back the male with skin dark as the night effortlessly. From a statistical point of view, it shouldn't have been possible, as the male looked stronger than my husband. The male was baring his teeth, fighting back with all might. Unsuccessfully. The Winter prince was quite cunning and had the upper hand, skillfully avoiding and replying to every strike. After one especially strong blow, the opponent's sword made an arc in the air and landed several feet away from them. The other male bowed and hurried to retrieve his weapon. Meanwhile, Kallias turned around, wiping sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand, all kinds of different muscles bobbing and flexing at that movement.

Seeing it, I swallowed hard. The entire world except for him and me vanished as I watched another drop of sweat rolling down that perfect body. A thousand tiny shivers ran through my body, a foreign feeling settling in my lower belly. I forgot how to breathe. I was drowning in an unfamiliar, unsettling feeling that made my heart hammer hard, fully mesmerized by my husband.

"You are so red. Are you feeling bad?"

Viviane's voice snapped me from the enchantment. She was peering into my face with a worried expression. As if he heard it too, Kallias' head turned in our direction and our gazes collided.

"I-I.. It's nothing," I stammered. "I think, I need some fresh air."

I pivoted, rushing away as fast as I could, oblivious to the puzzled gaze my friends exchanged.

What was that? It wasn't the first time I had seen Kallias without a shirt, so why my body react that way? Even being married to him, he felt like a forbidden fruit to me. His heart was out of my reach, already belonging to someone else and I knew it very well. Yet I couldn't help it. Ever since those moments on the balcony, I longed for him, hoping that something would eventually change and he would choose me, come to me.

I hurried through hallways and staircases, hardly noticing my surroundings blurred by tears that pricked my eyes. Turning the corner, I slammed into a hard body. Strong arms immediately wrapped around me, saving me from an embarrassing fall.

"Are you alright?"

My heart skipped a beat. It was him, Kallias. Just a moments ago, he had been on the training grounds. How could he get here so quickly? I wiped away my tears discreetly.

A strong smell of vanilla and something masculine that exclusively belonged to him hit my nose, flooding my mind with images of his sweating, half-naked figure and flexing muscles. Suddenly, my cheeks burned with embarrassment again, the hot flames licking at me from inside.

"Sorry," I squeaked as I pushed his arms away. Taken by surprise, he let me go and I ran away. I couldn't face him. Not now, not anytime soon.

* * *

Several days later, I wandered through the castle alone. Since the day my friends had taken me to the guards' training, I had been spiraling, my mind non-stop swirling in circles around the same thoughts - Kallias, his body glimmering in sun, smell of his sweat, his gentle touch, kind voice, those beautiful, cool eyes.. It was maddening. Eventually, I stopped trying to banish those thoughts. It was waste of time as they always returned right back.

In these days, I met my husband several times. He seemed to be same as usual, but I couldn't bring myself to even look at his face, mortified, and ended up running away like a coward.

I felt miserable and to be honest, quite lonely, too. Even these high stone walls seemed to shout at me that I shouldn't be here; that I didn't belong; that nobody needed or wanted me here.

I was so immersed in my thoughts that when I stepped into the courtyard, at first, I didn't notice I wasn't alone.

"Hi."

An unfamiliar male voice spoke behind me and I halted and pivoting, took a step back. Recognizing the face of that new guard, Rolland, I relaxed a bit. Like others in his rank, he wore a simple light-blue and silver uniform with dark grey breeches, his boots and cloak lined with fur. Towering over me, he was truly a mass of a male and quite intimidating. I quickly scanned the courtyard, but we were alone. Not even a single servant was passing by. Cold sweat began to roll down my spine and I tugged my cloak closer, keeping my head down.

"Easy, little one," he cooed with a playful smirk, holding up his hands with open palms. "I'm not going to hurt you. I just wanted to talk, you know."

Unable to make a sound, I carefully took another step back.

"I saw you on the balcony the other day and well.. I've never seen you around here before, so I was curious." He ran a hand through his short hair, making it look even messier than before, but strangely, it suited him.

"I have to go," I managed to say, my voice trembling, and I headed to the closest exit. He easily outpaced me, walking backward in front of me.

"Could you at least tell me your name, beautiful lady?" He grinned confidently, showing his white teeth. Such a gesture most likely worked on others but not on me.

Frustrated, I halted, looking around and praying for some help. He was visibly flirting with me and I didn't like it one bit.

"Oh, I'm sorry, my lady. How rude of me! Please, excuse my inappropriate behavior. I'm new here and still learning. I should introduce myself first. I'm Rolland, a guardian originally from the North Tower. To your service." He performed a perfect bow with one hand over his heart.

I opened and closed my mouth, unsure of what to do.

"May I know your name now, my fair lady?" He raised his head and winked at me. He spoke kindly and respectfully, with a dose of casual playfulness in his voice and he didn't make a single move to touch me, yet I felt really uncomfortable.

Despite refusing to tell him my name, his smile didn't falter once. However, he wasn't giving up either. "So, how about a short walk to get to know each other before you decide whether to tell me your name, my lady? I heard that the southern gardens are really spectacular. It would be my honor, if I could accompany you there."

Indeed, the southern gardens were beautiful and a favourite place for walks of many. There, for sure, would be someone who could help me out, but frankly, I didn't want to risk going anywhere with this male anywhere. He might not be a real threat, only a harmless flirt boy as I had heard, but what would others think if they saw me with him? Under Rolland's expectant gaze, I began to sweat even more.

"Is there something you need from my wife, guard?"

Hearing that blood-curdling voice, our heads snapped in its direction. Kallias crossed the courtyard, heading toward us with hands crossed over his chest, power and superiority radiating from every inch of his tall figure. Rolland's eyes widened in surprise and he fell to his knee, bowing deeply.

"I'm very sorry, my Lord. Not knowing it was your Highness's wife, I approached the lady. I swear on my life I had no bad intentions. Forgive me, please."

If looks could kill, the young guard would most likely be dead by now. Letting him kneel, Kallias watched him with a muscle twitching in his jaw, hands at his sides clenching and unclenching. I didn't dare even to breathe.

"Return to your post," my husband said at last in a much calmer voice. Rolland immediately straightened up and left with a bow and a quick murmured apology to me.

"Are you okay?" he turned to me as soon as we were alone. Even though he was worried and tried to be as kind as usual, a certain irritation bubbled beneath the surface.

I nodded shakily. The muscle twitched in his jaw again.

"This is what happens when you suddenly appear at the guards' training, eyeing other males," he frowned. "You shouldn't do it anymore. People will start to spread all kinds of rumors."

Those words stung like a dagger and hurt spread through my system like fire. "I was watching you," I blurted out without thinking it over.

His brows shot up to his hairline. His lips slightly parted and then slowly curled into an amused smile. Clasping his hands behind his back, he stepped closer, tilting his head to the side.

"If you want to see me without a shirt, you don't need to imagine it or go to those trainings," he half-whispered near my ear, mirth in his voice. "You are always welcome to come to my chambers. You already know the way."

I inhaled sharply, the heat rising in my cheeks. My heart flipped as his rich scent gently wrapped around me like a warm blanket.

Kallias stiffened, surprised by his own words. Before he hid the lower half of his face beneath his hand, I noticed that his cheeks were dusted with a deep shade of pink.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to.. Ehm, that was too presumptuous of me. Please, forget it." Pivoting, he marched away, leaving me in the middle of the courtyard gaping at his back. Running both hands through his hair, he disappeared in the shadows of the hallways.

With my heart wildly pounding, I returned to my chambers. Cauldron... What was that?

[bkglovergirl]

Hi there! So I was wondering if you could make a fic about bakugou x reader, where she and bakugou were childhood friends similar to him and deku, but the reader has been obvious about her crush on him, always complimenting him, telling him she likes him, even going to UA with him.

He would always straight up rejects her but lowkey likes her, (moving forward to kats arc where hes being a better person lol) the reader still makes him bentos from time to time, always follows him but it doesn't seem to 'irritate' him as much (hes just so happy with her always taking his side), patching him up ect. you get the picture

that is until a girl from class B started taking a liking to bakugou as well and theres a senario where reader gets the wrong idea and think that they're dating class B bitch who always tries to get on her nerves, but in reality bakugou straight up rejects her

reader changing bla bla bla, bakugou being like "WHYD YOU STOP BABYING ME STUPID ASS??!"

readers like "wtf?" bakugous like, "if you we have a problem talk to me, im your bf after all"

sorry if its long. i had a wonderful dream id like to relive ❤️

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ Bakugou X Reader

Childhood friends to lovers

I love the miscommunication trope, the ending is a little bit different.

Word Count: 2.3k

ೃ⁀➷

Ever since you could remember and much to Bakugou’s dismay you, Deku, and him have been childhood best friends. One thing is very well known between the trio. You have the biggest crush on Katsuki Bakugou. You make sure it’s known. The first time you realized you liked him, you told him almost right away. You both were around the age of seven and were at a playground fooling around. Neither of you guys had gotten your quirks and you “trained” at this particular playground every day whenever you could. You were running chasing the “villain” Deku around and around. Both your faces had dirt covered and you knew with how your clothes looked your mom was gonna be upset at you but who cares? You didn't.

“I’m gonna get you!”

“Nuh-uh!” Deku runs behind the slide and you follow after. 

“Boo! Huh?” He had disappeared, quickly you looked around and saw him running up onto the base of the playhouse and into one of the small tunnels that connect the two. You run after. Not paying attention you miss one of the steps on the stairs and fall. Bakugou close behind went to go catch you and it was right then and there his quirk manifested and burned your arm as he grabbed you. “Ow! Ow!” You whined looking up at Bakugou. 

“Are you okay?!” Deku comes running back down towards you both and you are slightly dazed so Bakugou asks again, “Are you okay!”

“Your quirk! Bakugou your quirk!!” 

“I KNOW STUPID BUT ARE YOU OKAY?” You and Deku both give each other a look before looking at Bakugou. 

“Yes, I’m okay!” you lied. “Bakugou, your quirk!” He smiled, and it was almost like you watched his ego form right then and there. 

‘Hell yeah, I got my quirk before you two!' He turns and puts his arm out away from you guys and gives a small blast. “Look how cool it is!” After some of the excitement dies down, you manage to beg Bakugou to give you a piggyback as he walks you home after you both drop off Deku. “I don’t see the point in this.” He adjusts you on his back a bit to make it more comfortable for himself.

“Think of this as payback.” You giggle as you hear him groan. “Hey Bakugou?”

“What.”

“I like you.”

ೃ⁀➷

Years later you guys got into UA together and lucky for you and Izuku, in the same classroom as well. Confessing to Katsuki happens at least every other week, and him rejecting you happens every time. You both have gotten into a schedule. You’d walk to school and on certain days bring him a Bento box. You’d go to class and try and do everything with him if Mr Aizawa allows it. At the end of the day, Katsuki always walks you to your dorm before walking to his. 

You knock on Katsuki's door and hear some grumbling before he answers the door, “Why can’t I get you at your dorm? Why do you always come to mine?” You shrug and hand him the Bento box you made him. “You gotta stop making these.”

“You say that, but you love it!” he rolls his eyes and takes it out of your hands. You both start walking to class together. “So I was thinking you and I could pair up because I heard Izuku and Todoroki are gonna pair up.” 

“Why do you always wanna pair up together.” “To save you from the embarrassment of not getting picked.”

“I would get picked!”

“Absolutely not.” You go to open the door to the classroom but Katsuki quickly opens it for you, you smile and walk in. 

You follow him to lunch and sit next to him. He grumbles his small complaint but quickly eats the food he complained about. He never says thank you or compliments the food, but you know he appreciates it by how empty he leaves the bento once he’s done. “It’s cold.”

“Stop complaining, maybe you should have brought your jacket.”

“Alright asshole my fault I forgot it!” The bickering goes back a forth a bit before you stand up, “Walk without me I need to talk to Denki about something.”

“Whatever.”

ೃ⁀➷

You switch the song on your phone before putting it in your skirt pocket and walk to class. You smile seeing Katsuki ahead of you and run to catch up but stop quickly. Katsuki is handing a girl his jacket and she’s smiling at him. Your heart sinks and you feel nauseous as you watch him open the door for the girl. You look at his face. ‘Is he blushing?!’ you bite the inside of your cheek and walk into the classroom. You hear Katsuki call after you but you ignore him. The small banter between you two is non-existent and the whole class quickly takes notice because you are uncomfortably quiet. The notes Katsuki passes to you go unread and you push them off your desk. Katsuki is panicking in his head, he is going through every single thing he’s done today and he can’t think of anything he has done wrong. You were fine at lunch and if anything happened you wouldn't ignore him, if anything you'd whine and complain to him about it. To Katsuki’s surprise, he’s really annoyed you aren't complaining to him. The bell rings and you quickly stuff your bag with all your things and speed walk to the door. “Hi is Katsu there?!” of course, you would run into her and Katsu?! Who the fuck does she think she is? Everyone is staring at the two of you, you step to the side to let the girl in and she runs up to Katsuki. “Katsu!” Your classmate's eyes follow the girl and look at you thinking the same exact thing you are. You shrug and walk out.

ೃ⁀➷

The next morning you walk to the classroom by yourself. Denki and Izuku come to check on you but you wave them off saying you are okay. Before they both walk away you quickly ask Denki to be partners in training. He gives a look to Izuku before agreeing. Katsuki walks in minutes later, late. He tries to talk to you but Aizawa tells him to get into his seat and he obeys. 

Training starts a couple of hours later, and just like you guessed, no one wants to partner with Katsuki. He watched as you walked over to Denki when Aizawa announced that you all should grab partners. He’s crushed but shakes it off. His pride stops him from walking up to you. Kirishima takes one for the team and partners up with Katsuki. The training goes well, and surprisingly, you and Denki are a great team.

“I think we should be a team more often, Y/N!” You smile, agreeing with him. The next set of teams that are put against each other are You and Denki vs. Kirishima and Katsuki. During the whole fucking battle you manage to avoid Katsuki, you don’t know how you manage to pull that off and neither does he because he tried so hard to come after you specifically. By the end of the battle you and Denki come out victorious and Katsuki is pissed. Katsuki rips off his gauntlet looking at you and Denki walking off together and talking.

“Denki I-”

“Kaminari.” he corrects.

“Kaminari.” You smile. “I just don’t get it. Who the fuck is that girl?! Where did she come from? I’m with Katsuki so much how did I not notice there was another girl.”

“Doesn't he reject you all the time?”

“A part of me doesn't like it’s a rejection. He likes the things I do for him, but his rejection seems like a wait, not a no.” you put your hands up to your face, “I’ve liked him since we were little. The memory of me first liking him is imprinted into my body! How do you just get over that? How do you get over Katsuki Bakugou.” Kaminari puts his hand out to stop you from walking into a wall. You look at him and his face is looking at you with confusion.

“What do you mean by imprinted?” You roll up your sleeve and show him the big scar that was left on your body. 

“This happened when his quirk first manifested. It was by accident and instead of celebrating his quirk he made sure I was okay first.”

“That doesn't sound like Bakugou.”

“I KNOW!” You rest your back against the wall, and Kaminari leans against it facing you. You don’t know how long you talked, but at some point, the talking turned into scheming. Katsuki comes walking up and the girl is right next to him talking away and honestly, he’s annoyed. It takes everything in him not to scream in her face. He sees you first. Then he sees Kaminari leaning against the wall next to you. At the same time, you see him first. Then the girl walking next to him. He takes note that he’s changed and cleaned up after training, you guys aren't even changed out of your hero outfits and are still all messy. The training ended an hour ago. He stops walking which the girl next to him takes as a green light to wrap her arms around his arm. Kaminari notices and quickly stands in front of you to block your line of view.

“Don’t look it’s only gonna hurt more.”

“Come to my dorm.”

“What?”

“Come to my dorm right now.” You grab his arm and drag him away aggressively. Kaminari has to stop himself from complaining your grip hurts.

ೃ⁀➷

Katsuki got up early enough to get to your dorm room. He knows this is the time you leave, he knows your exact schedule to the T. He knows your whole life and who you're close with so he’s honestly so fucking confused why you walk out of your dorm room and run up to Denki fucking Kaminari. On top of that, you hand him a bento box. His fucking Bento box. He’s stunned and stands there like a dumb ass watching as you walk away with him.

Class is giving him a headache. He just feels the need to take as many pain pills as he can. You and Denki have been joking around non-stop and it doesn't help that you sit in front of Katsuki and Denki sits in front of you. The class feels like forever. There is no training today so it is just class and he doesn't know how long he can just sit here and watch as you painfully ignore him. He concludes he’ll talk to you before lunch but that plan is quickly foiled as the girl from class 1B comes barging into the classroom like she owns the place and attaches herself to him. Katsuki watches as you stare a second before Kaminari puts an arm around your shoulder and walks you out of the room as quickly as he can. He makes a new plan that he’ll talk to you at lunch but that plan is also quickly ruined as the girl blocks him at his table so he can’t get up and go to you. So as your plan goes perfectly, he gets a perfect view of you and Kaminari sitting and having lunch together. He then makes plan number three, he’ll follow you around until he gets the perfect moment to yell at you. It’s perfect. He follows you to class with the annoying girl talking away. He sits in pain the whole rest of class as he watches you and Kaminari fool around the whole time.

ೃ⁀➷

“Why are you following me around.” You turn to look at him. You landed at your childhood park once you realized Katsuki was following you around. It’s cold and you hug yourself.

“So she speaks.”

“Don’t be an ass Bakugou. Why are you following me?” Katsuki’s stomach sinks. At least he knows how you feel now.

“Bakugou?! What the fuck is wrong with you?!”

“What’s wrong with me?”

‘Don’t act fucking stupid.” He takes off his jacket and gets closer to you, You take a step back. “See what I mean?! I’m trying to give you my jacket and you step away from me! What the fuck Y/N!”

“Sorry, I don’t want what another girl got.”

“What are you- oh…”

“Yeah oh! Kaminari told me I wasn't being stupid but maybe I am! Maybe I should have stopped liking you when you rejected me the first time! BUT NO!” you get closer grabbing his shirt, “You make it so fucking difficult to not be in love with you!” He stares at you and leans down, as much as you don’t want to, you push him away. “No this had gotta stop. I’m not gonna let you keep toying with me and I gotta stop being so delusional.”

“You aren't being delusional.”

“Really because that girl has gotten more attention than I have gotten from you in years. Every time I confess since we were kids you act like I didn't say anything!”

“I just wasn't ready for things to change.” you scoff at him.

“It was always going to change! Did you like dragging me along? Where did that other girl come from?” you sit down on one of the swings and kick some wood chips. Putting your hands on the chain.

“I just wanted to make sure I liked you and I wasn't just… I don't fucking know! You're the only girl who has been in my life that wasn't my mom!” you glare at him.

“Wow.”

“Listen Y/N, I know it was stupid but I just needed to know before our relationship changed and I fucked everything up.” “So what was this conclusion from your stupid fucking experiment?” Katsuki takes this as a green light to come closer to you. You don’t say anything.

“That no girl compares.”

“Wow, Romeo it took you that long?” Katsuki stands in front of you and puts his hand on top of yours. You look up at him.

“Yeah, I know.”

“I’m not confessing again.”

“I know.” He leans down and kisses you. 

[floweringlino]

Macarons and kisses | L.F

𝙎𝙮𝙣𝙤𝙥𝙨𝙞𝙨 ; in which wherever she goes, he goes and the other way around.

𝙋𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜 ; pastry chef!Felix x Pastrychef!fem!reader

𝙉𝙤𝙩𝙚𝙨 ; fluff, tinie tiny bit angst, mentions of food, bullying by boss, crying, mention of alcohol, slightly suggestive near the end.

𝙒𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩 ; 2.3k

The gods menu masterlist

✎ ❀

“Y/N, how is the mise en place for tonight looking?” Her friend questioned her.

“Don’t you worry about me, Lix. Worry about that Gumbo thats burning on the stove.

He hurried away to continue his family meal for the rest of their colleagues, Stirring the stew.

Three years of culinary school, two years of training with the best pastry chefs that were around the world. Paris, Copenhagen and Brussels were the places she had trained and all of them took a lot from her. It was hard but it made her who she was and it got her to where she was today.

She knew what she was doing, maybe she was rhetorical best around. The only person that could challenge her in her ability's was Felix. The two of them had gone through a lot in the past, from starting school together to the job they were today. Y/n had followed Felix to the two star michelin restaurant they worked at the present day.

She liked her colleagues. Felix and her had made the pastry their own and powered through the short and difficult days. Hyunjin had also become a good friend of hers and that made her rough days there better.

There was only reason why the days were so bad to start with. Her only problem with this team was the chef. Never in her short but eventful carrier, she had even met a man like him. A man so pathetic, so mean and so heartless. He made her days horrible until the point she cried her way home. But that was the job she thought.

Not every experience is supposed to be a good one.

"Corner." She told her colleagues before making her way across the corner. She said a couple of behinds while passing her friends and made her way to the kitchenaid that was whisking the eggwhites.

Very slowly she poured the sugar water while the whisk was doing its thing. As the mixture started taking the texture that she needed a confident smile appeared on het lips.

"Y/L/N, you better not mess up those macarons, I might actually kill you."

And with that the smile fell again.

"Little does he know you never mess up your macarons." Felix bumped her shoulder a little bit to make her smile again.

"I don't do mess ups. Especially not here.”

"Everybody makes mistakes babes." He reminded her.

"Calm down Hannah Montana. I wanna live out this job before he kills me." She looked up at her best friend while still doing her work. So familiar with the recipe she didn't even need to look.

Felix was also already looking at her. It made her giggle so he felt like he accomplished his mission. The look he gave her was one of pure admiration. They both did the same thing but she did it with so much passion.

"Stop looking at me." She blushed and looked away, hoping he hadn't seen it. But someone had.

"Im sorry. Ill stop. Finish those and help me with family meal?" She nodded in response and watched him walk away to the stove where he had a stew cooking for dinner.

After a little while she left her macarons to rest for a little bit as the shiny layer needed to turn matte before pushing them into the oven. Leaving them alone she made her way over to her Friend.

"What can I help you with, Lix?" He turned around from his conversation with Hyunjin and stood next to her over the stew.

"Can you cut the okra, chorizo and the green onion? I want to add it last so that it stays crunchy at the end." She nodded in response and made a station next to Hyunjin. As she did the stuff Felix had asked her to do, Hyunjin poked her in her side to get her attention from her. To keep him annoyed a little bit she waiting with responding until he yelled.

"Yah! I wanna talk to you. Talk to meee! Im bored."

"Whats up Jinnie. How are we feeling?"

"Keep this a secret okay?" She nodded in response as a promise to keep his secret.

"Im kind of thinking of quitting." She was shocked, thinking she was the only one with a problem with Chef.

"And why would you? I respect your decision, obviously. Honestly same. But im confused. I thought you liked it here?"

"I do like it here. But something doesn't feel right. I don't know how to explain it to you."

✎ ❀

It was 12.00 at night when y/n was called into chefs office. Dinner service had just ended and the kitchen staff was done cleaning. Making their was over to the dressing rooms he picked her from the crowd. And the guys could follow the entire conversation through the walls.

"Y/n I called you here because there are some things in your behaviour that are just unacceptable and you need to change some things."

"Im sorry sir, what exactly are you talking about?"

Im talking about the fact that you are here to work. Not flirt with your colleagues." He said it with such a stern look on his fave that she had no idea if he was kidding or not.

"Im sorry?"

"Y/n, im gonna get straight to the point. So far you have disappointed me in your abilities and have shown me nothing that you can be proud of. We, the guys and me feel like you spend more time flirting with Felix than actually doing your job, and today I also saw you with Hyunjin. Leave the boys alone or im going to have to fire you."

"Sir im gonna tell you something and you might not like it, but this company that you try to run? It sucks. You're not gonna have to fire me because I quit affective immediately. You can keep my last paycheque and shove it up a place where the sun doesn't shine. I hope you lose your staff and those stupid stars you worked so hard for."

"Leave my office now."

"Already leaving. And if I were you, I'd start working on the rat problem you have. It would be a shame if someone saw one and made an anonymous complaint with the health department."

She slammed the door closed behind her, rushed her way past her colleagues with her hand in the air as in a motion for them to not touch her and when Felix tried to grab her hand she shook it away. Not wanting anything to do with him at this moment.

It took all of them a moment to realise what just actually happened and as soon as it was processed, Felix stepped into the office, Hyunjin following him closely.

Not a single tear was waisted on that pathetic excuse of a leader on her drive home. She couldn't help but laugh a little bit mixed with the anger she had let out. It had been building up for a while and now that it was all let out she felt sooo much better.

She didn't even worry about her job, she could easily get another one. Another thought crossed her minds but quickly pushed it away.

Sitting down on her couch she let herself sink in and enjoy the weight that had dropped off her shoulders.

Walking to her kitchen she grabbed a bottle of wine and poured herself a glass. After that she changed into her pyjamas and sat back down on the comfortabel couch, not planning to get up again.

What would she do. There were about twelve job offers she could consider but was that really what she wanted. Was this where she wanted to take her talent. Her mind wondered to a new place, her place. She had an investor that would be interested in her doing this so realistically it would work. But what that something she was ready for.

A knock on her door interrupted her thought. She groaned out of frustration not wanting to get off of the couch. She waited 10 seconds before opening her front door.

Standing in front of her in all of his glory was Felix. His now long blond hair was a bit wet from the light rain outside. He only smiled at her, opening his arms for a hug which she gladly accepted.

She found comfort in his arms and it eased her mind. His hand held she back of her neck closer to him and they just stood there for a minute before letting go and coming back inside. Without talking they sat down on the couch. She sat between his legs and halfway layed on his chest.

"What happened after I left?" She questioned, taking his hand in hers and playing with his fingers.

A chuckle left his mouth.

"We quit, Hyunjin and I. We talked about it before but this was the last push we needed."

"Lix! Why did you quit? You kinda need a job." She couldn't help but laugh a little bit at what he said.

"And you should know better. Where you go. I go. I moved to Denmark with you remember?. We'll have to tell our next job that we're a package deal." He winked at her when she looked up at and stared at his eyes.

"Lix, what if we didn't search for a new job?" She questioned him, sitting back up and turning to face him a little bit more. His face read confusion.

"What do you mean, love?"

"What if, we finally called back those investors and opened our own place?" Her eyes held hope. Hoping he would say yes. They had talked about it before, but now it was serious. She ment it this time.

She tried to read his face but there were so many emotions to notice. God, she hoped he would say yes. She didn't really know what else to do. Finally when his mouth turned into a smile he responded.

"Let's do this." He grinned at her and she threw her arms tightly around his neck.

"You sure?" She needed to ask him, maybe he felt like he was pressured.

"I thought about it, and I think we can do this. It may even be the next step for us." He gleamed at the idea now. It would be their place instead of only hers, where he would work. Both of them would be owners.

"Let's look at our old Pinterest boards!" She exclaimed excitedly, dragging her laptop to her lap, laying back against Felix his chest. He pushed her back for a second to stand up. He missed her warmth immediately but if she was gonna drink wine, so was he. Grabbing himself a glass and taking the rest of the full bottle with him he sat back on the back and let her rest against him again.

This time she pulled a blanket across their laps and comfortably sat on the couch, just talking through their ideas.

Pastry's, cookies, pie's, cakes, chocolates

Felix would do the chocolates because Y/N hated temping the mass. Absolutely hated it. She made Felix do it on her final assignment and she finished it with an 8. But it was fine cuz he made her make his Sabayon.

It now was 4 in the morning and Y/N was talking through the paint options, Felix was too distracted to listen to her talking. His eyes watched her lips move and he did hear her voice. But all he could think about was how beautiful she looked. So passionate she glowed with love.

He wanted to kiss her but her back was still resting on his chest. And the fact she was just his best friend. They had finished the wine long ago and he definitely wasn't drunk. He knew what he wanted, had wanted since they first met.

His point finger traced her jawline and cheek and she pressed into his touch, wanting more. His stare at her was intense as he traced his finger across her bottom lip. Against his chest he felt her heart skip a beat. Scared he had gone to far he pulled his hand away but was stopped when it was dragged back.

Fuck it he was gonna do this. His hand pulled her chin in his direction, turning her face his way. When their eyes looked it was pure love they both say, and without thinking he grabbed the back of her neck and her jaw and pressed his lips to her.

She didn't even need to think and eased into the loving kiss. She had wanted this for so long but was scared of what it would do to their friendship.

The kiss was intense but long awaited. In the kiss she turned around so she could sit in his lap the other way around now wrapping her legs around his waist and her arms wrapped around his neck pulling him even closer.

His hands slid to her back, underneath her pyjame. A soft moan from her, made him insert his tongue into her mouth, making the  kiss even deeper than it already was.

"God you're so beautiful." He whispered against her lips and he felt her smile against his.

"I can do this all day." He said again continuing the make-out in the couch. She fully sat on his lap, softly grinding against him, making him groan from the friction of the jeans against him.

"Then do me all day." She grinned and with that he lifted her from the couch, guiding hee to her own bedroom, where the night didn't end till the sun began to rise again

[mj0702]

Hi , hope you are doing better admin and welcome back.

When bb becomes the coach along with alexia , I think mapi is banned from attending the match because she shouts from behind encouraging bb and baby engen is just happy to join her mother. Only ingrid is there along with baby engen while mapi shouts to the tv and bagheera is just judging her.

This was sitting in me asks way too long... sorry anon 😅

Bb begged Alexia to give Mapí a small job on the team so Alexia had to find a small, easy, basically unimportant position she could set Mapí up with

Mapí became "Head of Gear" meaning she was in charge of all the trainings gear settings it up (like cones and stuff) and making sure everything is intact and on the pitch when Alexia needed it

To Alexias surprise it went really well and Mapí took her job very seriously - until....

Until they were playing Madrid and Bb just grabbed stuff from Mapís Gear dufflebag and started to throw it at the Madrid players and Mapí then started to hand Bb things to throw

Alexia had to go back into Capitana mode when Bb hit Athenea with a cone on the back of the head - she put Bb in Timeout on the bench and banned Mapí to the stands where Ingrid was already waiting"i told you you wouldn't watch Classico from the pitchside"

Baby Engen was very happy her Mamí was with her in the Stands - she sat there with her little "Engen-Leon" Jersey on Ingrids lap clapping happily whenever Bb shot off the bench yelling and gesturing wildly for Alexia to just send her back... Bb sulked a lot on the bench that day

After the game Bb made it her personal mission to talk as much catalan trash to Athenea she could remember from all the time spend with Aitana and Ona - Athenea just looked confused and answered "I don't speak catalan" for Bb to reply "I know... you are just beneath me Sir"

Alexia groaned a lot on that day - and she had to have a very stern talking about professionalism with both Bb and Mapí... it didn't help tho... next time they played Madrid Mapí snuck an actual Paintball gun in and Bb had the warm-up time of her life when Madrid came out... the only one she spared was Misa - Misa is her Aunt Jennis best friend and therefore not to be touched or Paintball-ed

After that Mapí wasn't even allowed in the Stands anymore so Bb and Mapí had to come up with new ways to make Alexias time a living hell - they used walkie talkies... it took Alexia an embarrassing long time to figure out what was going on - Keira immediately saw the little in-ear nudged in Bbs left ear... Keira got herself a large Coca-Cola that game alongside her usual large Popcorn because she immediately saw it's gonna be big cinema and she'll just enjoy the shit show that was about to go down

Mapí also implanted in her daughters mind that whatever Auntie Neña says Baby Engen had to do - Bb used an innocent child to spit on Atheneas head every time the woman was fairly close... Bb got put in Stands timeout where she was seated between Irene and Marta (both Mothers at that point) so she wouldn't cause any more trouble and the two former Barca players could have an eye on her

It went well until Athenea decided to turn around, locking eyes with Bb and discreetly lifted her middle finger... oh all hell broke loose after that - Bb shot out of her seats, climbed over people, jumping down the barrier to full on bodyslam into Athenea from the back... it took three men and Alexia to get Bb off the Madrista - all while Bb had a cheering Mapí in her ear

Keira just sat there leaning over to Laura who was there with her "Told you it's gonna be an interesting game" ... "Shouldn't you do something?" ... "Nope... today she's officially Alexias problem - I'm just here to enjoy the atmosphere of El Classico"

#bbhc #anon

[ceasarslegion]

OK...I'm asking....

Yay!

So this happened in what I consider the worst job I ever had. And that is saying something because I very much worked retail in a mall. I had just graduated uni, I couldn't afford toronto anymore, and I needed a full-time job to make ends meet now that the stability of university was gone. So I went to edmonton because I had one family member I could stay with until I got on my feet. And I was not in a position to turn away a job that paid.

So I took a door to door sales position. For telus. I can hear the canadians in the room wincing so to everyone else: telus is one of the three whole mega megacorporations that control the ENTIRE canadian telecommunications network. And all three of those companies are buddy buddy and have us all by the balls. That's why canadian phone plans are the most expensive in the world. Not in the developed world: in the WORLD.

The meth lab incident happened on my 3rd whole day on my own. I was in St. Albert, which is this suburb of edmonton that is like if a kale smoothie and that guy who won't shut up about bikhram yoga had a baby they abandoned in an HOA meeting. Which is what makes this that much more unhinged: it was in the most cookie cutter suburbia part of the EMR.

So I was doing my knocks in my blue Jay's hat and my telus branded polo shirt with my clipboard and I knock on my next door. I'm greeted by a middle aged woman who proceeds to dump on me that she's divorcing her husband of 30 years and moving to New Brunswick. I'm like okay cool I just wanna sell you cable packages, good luck with that?

I write that off and continue along the cul de sac until I knock on this other lady's door. And when I say talkative I mean a real chatty Kathy. She practically grabs me by the collar and plops me down on her deck chairs, shoves a coffee in my hand, and says "HEY TELUS GUY DID YOU KNOCK ON METH GUYS DOOR???" And points to the house of the lady who just told me she was getting a divorce

At this point I have forgotten about my commission. I have forgotten about my shitty supervisor and how every part of this job sucks and how I wanna go back to Toronto. I have thrown away my clipboard I have started sipping her coffee that could very well be spiked with something and I go "you have to tell me about the meth guy"

That house I knocked on? The weird oversharing lady who was getting a divorce? Her husband was running a meth lab out of the basement THEIR ENTIRE MARRIAGE and she ONLY FOUND OUT THEN?? He called it his man cave and said that she wasn't allowed in?? And then one day she went down out of curiosity and it was a METH LAB??? All the bonuses he said he got at work were meth money.

I'm still enamored by how this happened. Did it not smell? Like for those who don't know edmonton there is a HUGE meth problem here. Like across the political aisle we all agree that something has to happen about all the meth, the details get foggy and that's where people argue, but needless to say I have smelled and been offered meth before just by virtue of living downtown. That shit REEKS. Like you know meth smell because it somehow smells like the word "meth." You will know what you are smelling even when you've never smelled it before. And it lingers. It hangs. It gets into walls. I know when I've taken a train car before because the smell of that guy who hotboxed it with meth smoke last week will still kinda be there. There's no way that house didn't smell like ass down to the foundation.

And the "you arent allowed in my man cave" excuse... im enamored by both the sexism towards his OWN WIFE and the way she just... went along with it for 30 years? Never set foot down there? The sexism and the just believing it?

I kept trying to steer the conversation back to the meth lab and this lady I was on the porch of kept actively trying to buy internet deals from me. Like she was the only person I ever pitched who was TRYING to get my bundles. I ended up just handing her my list of products and told her to check off what she wanted and was like "more meth lab?" And she went right to "yknow i think if I was your age I would've been a boy now. We didn't really have those terms when I was a kid" I DID NOT BRING THAT UP MA'AM I DONT HAVE TIME FOR YOUR GENDER CRISIS TELL ME MORE ABOUT THE METH LAB

That job was so shit that that was the only one I ever quit with no back up plan and did not regret for a second. I then went to the mall and handed out CVs and got my retail job by the end of the week from doing that.

[clouduru-chan]

I've been crying for half an hour because I was playing Signalis.

And my friends. What a wonderful game, I didn't understand anything at first, but the feeling and love between Eslter and Ariane moved me so much.

And that gave me a fanfic idea.

I've already created the idea a little in my head, but I wanted to know if you would like something like this.

Reader was a human who had the power of photographic memory, she never forgot anything since her birth. She lived with her mother who was a depressed woman who had lost her husband in a conflict with a super villain (her father worked as one of Cicel's soldiers), and with depression and overprotection, she didn't let her daughter leave the house, her education was all at home until she was thirteen. Reader was living well, she loved music and art, and loved her mother's company. But her aunt (her mother's brother), is a damn Karen.

Who kept calling the Office of Children's Issues saying that her niece was living in terrible conditions and was stuck at home. The Office of Children's Issues went to check the complaint, and upon seeing the case, they thought it was right to take the daughter from her mother's house to do a more in-depth investigation, but one day without her daughter, Reader's mother commits something against one's own life, which forces the girl to live with her bitch aunt (by the way, her aunt wanted to have children, but couldn't because she was infertile, so she was jealous of her own sister, and now she has to take care of her niece).

Reader is forced to study at public school, she is bullied because she has never interacted with another child in her life and others think she is weird.

At school she meets Mark, who defends her from bullying (this is before he has super powers) and he becomes her great and first friend, she starts to like comics because of him.

She also befriends William, and as they strengthen their friendship, Mark makes her promise that she will always be with him no matter the situation. They grow up, Mark gained his powers at 17, and asks Reader to be his girlfriend, and they are planning to go to college together (she wanted to study arts or even history of literature, but her aunt forced her to study medicine, and since she is a submissive person, she accepts to go to the college of her aunt's choice).

And also the aunt wouldn't finance the college either, and you who didn't even have much money to finance your own college, and also didn't usually tell your problems to Mark and his friends. Reader finds Cicel and asks if he has a job for her (since her father worked for the government, she thought she could work too), and since Cicel was a friend of her father, he hires her, and she works on simple things, cleaning up brutal crimes caused by captured villains, and until she has proper training (which she learns quickly because of her ease of learning because of her memory).

The government begins a new experiment to collect memories from soldiers, and Reader joins the project because she would earn more money to pay for all her college tuition.

Mark finds out that she works with Cicel and what she has already done, he is disappointed and breaks up with her, saying that she deceived him (even though the idiot never told her that he was the invincible one). She is devastated, but continues her work, until the tragic day of her death, when she was removing all the government people from the house in front of Mark's house, since Omni Man had discovered the place and was killing everyone, and she ends up dying in the worst possible way.

After the Chicago disaster and a month passes, Mark doesn't see Reader at school or even after starting college, he believes that she abandoned everything and just works for the government now. He starts dating Amber and tries to do everything he can to be a good hero.

The project in which the reader participated began using her memories, since she had a knack for learning quickly, and they created an Android with a similar appearance to her, to solve any type of problem until the heroes arrived. The initiative of this project was to reduce the losses of human soldiers in conflicts.

And the Pentagon staff and Cicel call her Krähe (which is crow in German), she works well in a team, helps humans and has not shown any irregularities until the day she started working.

The soldiers don't like her, because they believe she will take their jobs away.

And the story would consist of a psychological horror.

I really liked the story of Signalis, and I thought about using a bit of the game's idea for a sad story with Mark. If you like it, I'll work on the story better, it's just a draft of what I'm thinking of doing.