#who canceled roger rabbit

[loving-n0t-heyting]

It's weird that antipsychotics have a better reputation in pop culture than electroconvulsive therapy does, since while I've def heard of ECT fucking people up pretty bad even today, I've actually heard more people describe positive experiences from it than from antipsychotics. Not wading into whether or not shock treatment is good on the whole; I don't think I'd ever get it myself. Just noting the irony that antipsychotics don't have a reputation at least as bad, when besides Freddie de Boer I don't think I've ever heard anyone who took antipsychotics come out swinging for them like I have with ECT.

Strong suspicion i should some day sit down to research more rigorously is that there has been a massive pharma propaganda campaign to get the public on board with antipsychotics. The amount of positive presentation it gets in the wider culture otherwise just sort of boggles the mind

[st-just]

Another problem with "bi means attracted to all women and a handful of men" is that it feeds into the cultural tropes of "women are objectively more sexually desirable than men" (which connects to some truly toxic ways our society treats women)

re:

Y'know there absolutely is a near-omnipresent cultural script where women are The Sexy Gender and being noticeably distracted/vocal about how sexy a guy is in public/mixed company is, like, Weird by comparison but also online this has definitely become a lot less salient to me since I started spending all my free time on the fujoshi and erotic cannibalism website.

[supernovasilence]

More Narnia headcanons, specifically pertaining to Edmund: He learns to cook and often treats the girls he meets to his own cooking, given his triggers around accepting food from strange women

hey so I know this was sent months ago but I never check my askbox

Love this idea! I headcanon Edmund as having quite the love of food, but he definitely would have issues around it after the Turkish delight. And even after defeating the Witch, he'd still be really stressed, his first months in Narnia, with memories of all that happened, and all the pressure of learning how to run a country. So imagine him going down to the kitchens, maybe sneaking down late at night, trying to teach himself how to cook, as a comfort and a way to exert control over his life and as something mundane and familiar. Ofc the actual cooks catch him, and try to shoo him away because royals have no place in the kitchen, but he insists they teach him. Orders them to, actually, and it's the first time he's pulled rank on someone (not that people don't do what he says, but he's never used his crown to make someone do anything they really didn't want to before). And the cooks can see how desperate he is, that he's ordering (because Edmund's been the quietest of their new monarchs so far), and it's that more than the actually order that makes them teach him.

And then Edmund gets really good at it. Later, it's less about comfort and more a hobby he enjoys, and he's proud of his skill. Entertained, too, by the way no one ever expects it of him. And presenting a basket of hand-made pastries or a fancy dinner is very useful when courting someone.

[toontownjusticedepartment]

Found this cancelled Roger Rabbit inspired film

[anneapocalypse]

I like your post about gray morality in video games! On the other hand I wanted to add that the gray decision-making you're talking about can have its own pitfalls (distinct from the pitfalls of centrist/apolitical "both sides are bad" apathy). I'm thinking of gritty action heroes who are presented as morally gray because they're pragmatic enough to torture and kill in the name of Truth, Justice, and the 'Murican Way, or just in the name of a macho revenge fantasy. To be clear, this isn't an indictment of gray morality, which I love when done well. Hell, the stories I'm complaining about tend not to be THAT gray in practice, as the bad guys are often SO exaggeratedly bad that there's not a real question of whether the hero is willing to Do What It Takes in the end. My point is more just that that's what people often mean when they condemn "gray morality."

Hi! Sorry this has been sitting my ask box for a while, I got busy and didn't want to just dash off a response.

(We're talking about this post, for those who haven't seen it. RIP my notifications.)

Anyway I'll just say here for the record that yeah, gray morality in fiction can be done poorly! While the line for "done poorly" is going to be different for everyone, I can certainly think of examples I've disliked.

(This got long, sorry in advance. 😩 Also, spoilers for Fallout 3 and all the Dragon Age games, if anyone cares!)

My go-to example of one I think is a real stinker is the Fallout 3 DLC "The Pitt" where the critical decision is... whether to free a bunch of people from being enslaved in horrible conditions! But! in order to free them, you have to kidnap a baby from... the enslaver. Because something something the baby's genetics are the key to curing the illness that afflict the slaves from their horrible working conditions... you don't actually have to hurt the baby, though, she'll be fine. She'll just be taken away from her parents. Who are, again, slavers. I promise I'm not making it sound any stupider than it sounds in the game itself. :P Like the whole concept of putting an infant in your video game inventory and making a break for it is just a little too wacky for me to take seriously, but it feels like you're meant to take it seriously, and apart from trying to inject some ambiguity into the decision, I'm not sure why the whole baby plot would even be there. Honestly, Fallout 3 isn't a game about moral ambiguity. (I think both New Vegas and even Fallout 4 do that kind of thing better.) Most of its major decisions boil down to "Do you want to do the Good Person Thing or the Evil Bastard thing?" That's the game. No one is trying to inject moral ambiguity into blowing up Megaton. It's just a thing you can do if you want to roleplay an Evil Character. I love Fallout 3, I'm just saying, that's what it is. And I think "The Pitt" would have been both more thematically appropriate and less stupid if it had just skipped the whole baby plot and been like "Hey! Do you want to be the Good Person who frees the slaves, or the Evil Bastard who allies with the slaver?" It's morally simple, but the thing is the baby didn't actually make that story or the decision any more interesting to me, so it might as well not have been there at all.

But Fallout 3 isn't the kind of thing I was thinking of when I made that post. I was thinking a lot more about things like the decisions in the Dragon Age games, which don't usually fall neatly into The Good Option and The Evil Option, and are more likely to ask the player to make their own judgments. And a common criticism I see of those games is that they're "centrist" and try to "both sides" in-universe issues because the game doesn't explicitly tell you which choice is The Good One, or it doesn't explicitly reward one choice and punish the other, and that's... not really an interpretation that I generally agree with? But that's a much more involved discussion, honestly. At some point, I'd like to write a post about how I feel Inquisition presents the mage rebellion, because it's such a big topic and big game (and by "I'd like to" I mean... I already have a draft started, whoops). That's just more than I have time to get into today!

But I will say this: I find the plot decisions where you're given an obvious "best option" to be the least interesting choices in the Dragon Age games. The Redcliffe decision in Origins is the most obvious one to me, where I think the option to save Connor from possession should at least have been much harder to find, because in the lore, the fact that mages even can be saved from possession and not just killed is widely unknown because it goes against the templar party line, and the fact that Ferelden's First Enchanter is just like, "Oh yeah, sure, we can totally do that, pack up the lyrium boys" just doesn't really mesh with everything else we're told about the Circles and conventional wisdom on magic. Plus, the fact that there's no consequences for leaving Redcliffe for days with Connor possessed just... makes the decision too easy, for me, because in-universe it feels like it shouldn't be that easy. There's also the werewolf decision, wherein the Lady of the Forest just tells you straight out that Zathrian can break the curse with his own death, presenting you with a "best option" that it feels both stupid and sort of comically evil to disregard (like, from a purely pragmatic standpoint why would you fight the entire pack of werewolves or an entire clan of elves when you can just make Zathrian solve the problem here and now).

The ending decision of DA2 is an example that I feel has a really stark moral contrast to it (which I've discussed before), and one that I think does place certain constraints on role-playing, but in that case I think it's appropriate to the themes of the game, so I don't mind it.

But my favorite plot decisions in Dragon Age are things like the Landsmeet, the Winter Palace, and even the Orzammar quest line. Not just because I love fantasy politics, but because you have to work with what you're given in a way that feels realistic to the setting and the story. No matter how much of a hero you are, you can't waltz into Orzammar or Denerim or Halamshiral and brute-force a perfect solution. Unless you're a dwarf yourself, you're an outsider who doesn't know anything about dwarven politics and no one is particularly forthcoming about the situation because everyone has an agenda! and yet you have to solve this conflict in order to get aid against the Blight. You have to make a decision based on very little information and almost none of it concrete. At the Landsmeet, you may want justice, but it's your word against Loghain's with no proof of what really happened at Ostagar, and if you want to win you need provable charges, you need to show the nobles that you support their interests and not just your own, and no matter which butt you put on the throne, you're faced with the very real possibility of another succession crisis a few decades on so congratulations, you've just kicked the can down the road.

And oh, the Winter Palace, my beloved. You cannot make Briala the Empress, no matter how much you might want to! You cannot abolish the monarchy. You cannot force Orlais to relinquish the Dales and re-establish the Elven state. Your options are: keep the empress whose reign overall has been sympathetic to elves and commoners and relatively diplomatic toward her neighbors, but who also may have just done a good old fashioned massacre to crush a rebellion and maintain her power; let her be killed and put the militant expansionist on the throne; get Briala and Celene back together (maybe with the hope that Briala will continue to influence her); help Briala do a blackmail which surely will work out totally fine and not backfire in anyway; or force them all to shut up and play ball for now, basically just kicking the can down the road. None of these options are perfect by any means! There are interesting and believable in-character reasons you might choose to role-play any of them. And every one has the possibility of unforeseen consequences later on, positive or negative.

I made the original post, in part, in response to condemnations of the kind of decisions I enjoy in these games. And at the end of the day, it's okay not to like those decisions, to prefer more unambiguous choices or more room to indulge in the fantasy of fixing everything. But that's not always the kind of story a game is trying to tell, and I think that's fine, and personally I enjoy the complicated decisions more. And I feel like sometimes those complicated or ambiguous choices are read as if they're either presenting all options as morally equivalent when they're not, or that they're "punishing" the player for a choice if it has any kind of negative outcome, and I don't think that's the case! I think it's fine and good in fiction to explore the ways in which trying to change things for the better can be difficult and how a choice with some negative consequences may still be the best one available, and so on and so forth.

Anyway, I hope I didn't get too far afield here, and thanks if you read this far!

[yharnamsnewslug]

I agree with your post about women enforcing sexist standards on each other, but the issue is kinda hard to talk about because misogynistic men have been known to use "women hate women more than men do" as a way to dismiss the issue of patriarchy. For example, growing up as a boy, I sometimes heard other guys crack jokes like "don't try to understand women; women understand women and they hate each other."

Yeah, and growing up as a girl I always heard "men will rape you at the turn of an eye, don't ever trust a man. All they think about is sex and sports. They're basically animals."

Like, misogynistic men will always use that shit to make no fucking sense and justify their misogyny. But I'm speaking out as someone who's been hurt by the misogyny inflicted by cis women. Soooooo.... yeah, it's hard to talk about. Are you saying we shouldn't? What's the point you're trying to make?

[specialagentartemis]

I'd personally translate "paîdos" as "cutie" but that would probably be too colloquial for Archaic Greek poetry

Love that. Honestly though that's the beauty of translation - the balance of perfect accuracy and lyricism in the target language, conveying meaning through each word deliberately chosen.

I suspect the reason translators rarely go for "youth" is because it sounds so clumsy and unnatural in English, but that's the art of a translator, to work on phrasing until it does feel natural. "I have been overcome with longing for a beautiful youth by slender Aphrodite" vs. "Slender Aphrodite has smacked me in the face with yearning for a cutie" both convey the same information but very different tones! And you could make either work. Terms of endearment seem like they could be worked into translations here in fun and interesting ways! It's a very cool idea...

[the-url-rater]

11/10

Some spins on the "mostly male team with a token woman" trope:

The woman is trans and stayed in her old circle of bros even after transition

The woman is the only one in her circle of "girls" who didn't turn out to be a trans man

[nai-nyeartwork]

In this AU, Alastor embraces modern technology to stay ahead of the game while Vox stays "vintage". They form a partnership to the point they are somewhat dependent on each other. They're still strong on their own but still, a terrifying duo when fighting together.

More about this AU:

Alastor's powers still use any form of radio frequency/wifi control, giving him access to any devices (both old & new). Using this ability to gain more info and sell it to any demon who fails to return a favor for him or Vox. Alastor still does his broadcasts of cannibal massacres, news/gossip, ASMR segments, music, and of course Vox's favorite cereal brand. Of course, there are drawbacks to being the radio demon and having deer features. Alastor would often get overstimulated by too much noise or information he was gathering. When that happens, Vox takes care of Al by giving him noise-canceling headphones and even mutes himself as they watch silent films together.

Meanwhile, Vox controls visual media/television, but depending on which television device he uses it tends to give him different abilities? Vox prefers the retro tv head because his power has some cartoon logic to it. Other sinners tend to underestimate his abilities, thinking he is the weakest of the duo. But in reality, Vox can transform into an electronic/ink-like monster that brainwashes people using tentacles like wires to connect their brains physically. He can upgrade his appearance but Vox likes taking advantage of any new sinners to trick them into signing a deal with him or Al since he looks "harmless.”

Their relationship can be seen like Jessica Rabbits & Mr. Rogers, in which Vox's appearance and mannerisms remind Alastor of simpler times. Despite the Radio Demon’s modern image, he still prefers old school, especially from the 1930s. If anyone insults Vox or tries to convince Alastor to ditch him, those demons end up in Alastor’s podcast describing in full detail what he is doing to them for all his listeners. While Vox transforms into a monster if anyone harms Alastor and makes sure to record it for his lover to watch later. He once made a vinyl record of Alastor’s worst enemies’ screams as an anniversary gift since Al is an audiophile. 

[delulu-with-wandanat]

Objective: Teenage Dreams.

Pairings: Wanda Maximoff x Natasha Romanoff

Tags: Pride month, bisexual Wanda, mutual pining, canon divergence, lesbian Natasha.

A/n: My gift before pride ends lol, it a little rushed but uhh... I enjoyed writing it and I hope you enjoy reading it. It's kind of a crack fic honestly, just good vibe for ye gays :D (Ps. sorry if there are mistakes I kind rushed this andd it's been a while.)

Summary: It's pride month and Wanda still hasn't made her move. Being the self-proclaimed greatest ally, Y/n and two other decided to give them a push.

On lazy days like these, Wanda usually spends it by reading a book, maybe binge watching some shows. Other times she spends it with her brother, but ever since joining the Avengers, Pietro has made it his ultimate goal to have Steve Roger's physique. He trained almost day and night, honestly Wanda could enter the gym at 9 in the morning finding her brother in the middle of a workout, and by the time she was finished he was still there.

Often time he was also with her best friend, who is now his gym buddy, Y/n Romanoff. Who was just as much of a gym rat as Pietro. Honestly, the amount of time they stare at themselves in the mirror was concerning. She's almost sure she had passed a video on social media featuring them titled; 'How to train like an Avenger'

So nowadays she spends her free time alone, even though she wishes she could spend it with a certain beautiful redhead-

Although it wasn't all that bad. Wanda had found a new fixation to spend her time on. Which was Fanfictions.

Now how does one stumbles upon this... wonderful world you might ask? Well for Wanda it started when she was watching a new TV Show she had recently discovered called, The 100. It was fun until they killed off one of her favorite character, Lexa. Wanda naturally dropped the show in an instant. During one of her rants to one of the new recruits, Kate Bishop then sent her a link leading to a website followed a text that read; "The showrunners might break your heart, but fanfiction authors will be there to pick up the pieces."

And Wanda... Fell down the rabbit hole from there.

At first all she searched was merely about wlw couples on her favorite movies and shows, like that one Supergirl TV show she had been recently watching. Or that one cute show called 'Everything Sucks' that got canceled after one season. Basically any wlw couples she started to like, but couldn't be explored due to the showrunners being a pus-

It didn't matter, she founded the holy-site that held all the stories in the world. Then, when she found nothing else to read there, it lead her journey to... a site that shares the same name as drinking bottle; Tumblr. Minus the 'e'.

The site gave her access to a whole new world and whole lot more stories. It was on this website that she found out there was a whole fandom for the Avengers, and many stories was written about them in different scenarios. Sometimes it was cute, other times it was... questionable-

You can't really blame her, can't you? Her name and the word mommy was basically inseparable on this site.

This was where she learned that people have also been 'shipping' one Avenger and the other. Curiosity got the better of the witch when she started to search herself... and a certain former Russian spy. She was surprised to see how many stories were written about them here. Wanda... may have gotten a little out of hand.

This was her guilty pleasure. Reading stories about her crush and herself in a scenario instead of actually trying to talk to her. Can you blame her though? She was what the internet describes as a 'Loser Lesbian'.

The little voice in her head prefers the word 'Useless Lesbian', which wasn't even accurate as she mostly resonates more with Bisexuality-

"Happy gay month, cus you know you bi and stuff!" Ah there it is, the 'little voice' burst through her door unannounced, causing Wanda to yelp and quickly shut her laptop close to hide her 'shameful' activity.

Wanda glared at the young Romanoff who was carrying 3 different items in his hand and approaching her on the bed. "What the fuck is wrong with-"

"Here, I got you a gay balloon cus it got all the color because it's GAY."

"Y/n-" She reluctantly takes the balloon.

"And I gotchu a vinyl album with that Sweater Weather song cus you Bi." He handed her the vinyl, how thoughtful.

"Ok-"

Lastly, "And I baked you a cake that says, 'BeeEE who yoOOUUu aaRREEE, for YooUURE PRiiiDEEEEeeeEE'" He sang the word off tune.

"Ok- Thank you... Uhm-" She grabs all the items and looks at them with confusion. "This is..." Wanda furrowed her eyes at her friend. "Why- Why did you do this, why are you doing this??"

"You know... Cus you're Bi!"

"I'm well aware of that fact."

"Well my dearest Wanda, in this holy month of June I have a very important mission to accomplish." The young Romanoff suddenly jumps on her bed and dramatically opens his arms as if he was some kind of showman. "I'm gonna get you a woman!"

The youngest Maximoff cringes her face and with a flick of her wrist she knock the soldier off her bed, earning a high pitch scream from him. "First of all, you can't get a woman for yourself how do you expect to get me a girlfriend."

"I have plenty of girls!" He said rather defensively as he sat up on the floor.

"And second, why is this so important to you?"

"What you don't want a girlfriend?"

"I still like guys you know."

He rolled his eyes, "I know that, but you always told me you wanted to try dating girls."

"Not just girls... a girl-" She mumbles.

"What was that?" The man raised a teasing eyebrow.

"Nothing! Now shut up, you haven't answered my question." Wanda said while huffing and crossing her arms.

"Because my dearest friend being Bisexual is one thing, but being bi yourself is just sad-" That statement earned him a rightful pillow thrown at him at full speed. Which he thankfully manages to deflect this time with his reflex.

Wanda then groans and plops on her bed. "You're not going to stop, are you?"

"Nope." Y/n even popped the 'p' to emphasize his point. With a roll of her eyes, Wanda agrees with an exaggerated fine and he joined her on the bed with a grin. "Now, first thing on the list is we need to get you some new clothes."

Wanda hastily sat up looked down at her current outfit and glanced at the mirror in her room. She gave him a stinky eye. "What's wrong with my clothes??" This rude bitch-

"Nothing..." Y/n said rather sassily, "I just... think it might need a little spice is all." Without asking for her permission, Y/n grabs her laptop out of her reach and opens it. "I was thinking we could- WHOAAA..."

"What's- NO!" Her eyes widens in panic has her dirty little secret have been exposed. The witch lunges herself to him only for the young super soldier to hold out a hand to keep her at a distance while staring bewildered at the screen before him. "GIVE IT BACK."

"OH MY GOD???? YOu into this shit?!!" Oh the young Romanoff was having the time of his life. He grinned as he looked at what the story was about, "Natasha Romanoff x Reader? Ohhh ho HO, you really llike her huh-?"

"Y/n I swear to god, GIVE IT BACK." She yelled, Wanda was fucking furious. She already had an annoying brother to deal with, what was she thinking adding Y/n into the mix.

"I want to see your blog." It was like she was seeing red, blood thumping in her brain.

Wanda screeched like a maniac, suddenly overpowering the super soldier. She was practically sitting on top of him wrestling with the now closed laptop, Y/n hugged the laptop close. "Y/N I WILL KILL YOU!"

"I JUST WANT TO SEE!"

"NEVER!" Their screaming was probably heard all over the compound as they wrestle for Wanda's laptop. However, a stern voice stopped their childish fight.

"Enough, both of you!" The two whipped their head to the door to see Natasha crossing her arms and looking at them expectantly. The two scurry off of each other and Wanda made a final yank on her laptop out of his reach. The two stood up like guilty children caught in a fight.

"He took my laptop without permission." Wanda spoke up before Y/n could open his mouth. The look of betrayal on his face brings pleasure to Wanda as Natasha's anger was now directed to him.

"You-"

"Y/n, you know better than to take other people's personal things." Natasha glared at her little brother.

"You're just going to believe her right out of the gate?!" He retorted.

"It's the truth!" Wanda said while hugging her laptop tightly.

"You little snitch-" The super soldier turned to face her challengingly. Before the two were about to enter yet another screaming match, Natasha's stern voice puts them in their place once again.

"You two are acting like children. I have enough of this, Y/n if you don't stop this childish nonsense I'll have you grounded from any missions."

"You can't do that?!" His eyes practically bulge out of it's eye socket.

"I can, and I will." Natasha's death stare easily intimidates him as he quickly mumbles an apology to Wanda. The spy's gaze turned to the witch with soft and caring look, unlike the one she gave to her sibling. "Wanda, if he gives you anymore trouble you let me know ok?"

"Thank you, Natasha." Wanda said shyly, a faint blush visible on her cheek. The redhead smiled at her before giving one last glare to Y/n and left to god-knows-where.

It was so painfully obvious that the two liked each other. Except the only one that fail to realize that is themselves. Operation Scarlet Widow was going to be a lot more difficult than he anticipated, Y/n might need a little backup.

"I seriously don't get why you can't just ask her out instead of reading a bunch of stories-"

This annoying fuck- "DON'T talk to me about that!" She suddenly uses her powers to float him out of her room. "I don't wanna hear about it-" She practically throws him out, Y/n lies on the floor while looking at his friend bewildered. Wanda gave one last glare and shuts the door on his face.

"But-"

"And stay out!" Her voice yelled from inside the room.

Being the annoying friend that he is, he got onto his feet and proceeds to bug the shit out of the witch. Y/n started with those gentle knocks on the door. "Honeyyy-" He teased her.

"Ohmyfuckinggod. Don't call me that!" Wanda yells again. Y/n snickers at her response.

"Wanda, come on..." He knocks again, hearing no response the soldier knocks on the door harder. "You can't hide forever, come out!"

"Jokes on you, I already am!"

"Not what I meant, but ok!" He snickers again, clearly Wanda would not be opening the door anytime soon. He makes his way to the gym to recruit some people who shall help him in this mission.

------

Upon entering the training grounds, Y/n found Yelena and Pietro in the middle of a sparring session. Only these two would spend their Sundays training.

"Dearest Brother, nice of you to join us." Of course Yelena would know it was him, despite having her back facing Y/n.

"Let me know when you want to spar with someone who can actually throw a punch." The soldier said with a smirk.

"Fuck you, Romanoff!" The silver-haired speedster gave him the finger before focusing back on his opponent. "You're the one who's lacking, I thought super soldiers could do this all day?"

Y/n scoffed, "Oh please, I can take you down without breaking a sweat. You rely mostly on your powers."

"Barf, are you going to keep bothering us or join us?" Yelena said with a roll of her eyes, using the distraction Pietro surges forward in an attempt to tackle Yelena. Although she may not have powers, her skills were beyond his years. Using the techniques taught by none other than her own sister, Yelena manages to take down the speedster with ease.

"Hah!" She snorted seeing Pietro with his face on the ground and tapping the floor to announce his defeat. Yelena gets off of him with a smirk on her face.

"Oh come on! If this was a real fight you know you wouldn't stand a chance." The speedster grumbles.

"I'm not denying that, but take that power away and you're just another damsel in distress."

Pietro narrowed his eyes. In the midst of her overconfidence, he uses his powers to knock Yelena on the feet, causing her to fall backwards onto her ass. Normally, her instinct would've kicked in and she would prepare for the fall, but this time Pietro stands in triumph while crossing his arms with a smirk on his face.

"Bitch." Yelena mumbles in Russian before dusting herself off.

"Now if you're both finished, I would like to make an offering." Y/n said while putting his fingers together like some menace business man with bad intention.

"You want to steal Tony's car and do a high speed race on the highway? I call dibs on the Mclaren." Yelena spoke up.

"So long as I get the Ferrari-" Pietro chimes in.

"No, but we'll get back into that because I always wanted to try his Audi. What I have is, how would you feel on playing cupid for our dearest sisters?" Yelena only raises an eyebrow while Pietro squints his eyes.

"I am getting sick of seeing them practically eye-fucking each other at the gym." Yelena started.

"Hey, that's my little sister." Pietro said while puffing his chest out playing the overprotective big brother role.

Yelena rolled her eyes, "She's 27 dipshit, and you're only 12 minutes older."

"Still my little sister..."

"Look we can all agree that these two needs to sort out their feelings, and since the two are completely useless as one is an idiot who thinks staring will magically get her a date. And the other has deep traumatic issues where she struggles to have proper relationship due to her upbringing. I'd say, maybe they need a little third party help?" Y/n opens his arms as if to wait if any of the two objects.

"And how do you plan on pulling this off?" Yelena asked.

"I was hoping you might help me figure that out." Y/n threw back the question. Yelena rolled her eyes.

"So you came to us for help empty handed?"

"Well I would argue dedication and sheer will counts for something." Y/n puffed out his chest, he clearly has nothing.

"We don't even know if Natasha likes Wanda back." Pietro chimes in, which earns him a raised eyebrow from the two Russians.

"It's hard to miss."

"Yeah, I can see the oblivious genes runs in the Maximoff's."

Maybe it was less obvious to someone who was not close to Natasha, she was a trained spy overall. And these two were practically raised to be more observant than others. Or that could just be the oblivious Maximoff genes.

"All I know is, Wanda has had this crush ever since she stole Natasha's jacket."

Y/n furrowed his eyebrows at Pietro. "Wasn't that like... a year ago with Ultron?" Yelena barks out a laugh, "You mean to tell me she's been pinning on Natasha for a year??"

Pietro shrugs his shoulders and smirked, "Wanda has bigger pool, but I'm the one getting all the girls."

"Barf-" Yelena said while fake gagging, earning a jab on the rib by Pietro. "If we want a shot for our dearest love birds we have to be quick, cause I'm noticing a certain android having his eyes on Wanda."

"Who, the toaster?" Pietro said while cringing his face.

"Ok... I can see you don't seem so fond of the guy, and Vision's not so bad y'know-" Y/n said, it's not that he was close with Vision. But he didn't understand why Pietro would look so utterly disgusted.

"No, he's not bad. But if this works out, you and I would be brothers for real, y'know?"

Damn... This was true brotherhood. "Bro..."

"Bro..."

The two hugged like it was something out of a bromance movie. Yelena could only watch with her arms crossed, wondering what the fuck was going on. However, while the two gym rats were having their moment, a plan formed in her mind.

-------

The trio sprang into action in an instant, ordering a bunch of pizzas, heading to the city to grab some supplies, thankfully alcohols were already taken cared of.

"Ok! Now we just need everybody here." Y/n said with a satisfied grin whilst taking a shot to give himself a head start. Yelena mimicked his movement and so did Pietro.

"FRIDAY, assemble the team to the common room." The AI gave Pietro the acknowledgement, soon enough the team entered the common room with a confused look.

"What's going on?" Steve was first to spoke up as he looked around the decorated room with food and beverages.

Wanda glances to a certain redhead a few meters away from her, Natasha initially had a bored look on her face, arms crossed, and was probably mentally preparing herself to whatever the hell her siblings had in mind. And it was as if the spy felt a pair of eyes on her she looked to the side and locked eyes with Wanda, instantly, the corner of Natasha's mouth pulled into a tiny smile and a small shrug.

Wanda blushed instantly and turned her gaze to the floor, tucking a hair behind her ear. The trio, saw this and glances at one another.

"Well dearest teammates." Y/n started, taking a microphone and speaking to it as if he was an mc. "Tonight will be the night-"

"What's with the mic, Y/n?" Natasha asked with a roll of her eyes.

"I was getting there," He responded while putting his hand up, "Tonight Is the night we let loose!" He whooped, yet the only one cheered with him was Pietro.

"Seriously?" Natasha asked with a raised eyebrow.

Y/n scoffed at his teammates, looking at all the low faces and annoyed faces. "Sam! Come on, you're always game." He asked, needing ATLEAST someone to be in it.

Sam sighed, "Man, I would but honestly I was looking forward to sleep early tonight." Y/n looked at him as if his heart had been stabbed.

"Wanda??" He asked his best friend, and Wanda groaned at him. Oh this was a rough start.

"Honestly, I'm in the mood for some me time and not... whatever this is." She replied indicating to the alcohol bottles on the table.

"Sorry kid, looks like everyone is super tired." Steve added with a pity look, "Maybe next time plan things out."

"But that's boring!" Pietro exclaimed, and speeds to every single one handing out a shot glass filled with vodka.

"It's not just any normal drinking night, there's singing involved." Yelena finally chimed in while dunking another shot.

"Yelena, you can't possibly be part of this." Natasha asked her sister, and Yelena shrugged in respond.

"Any reason to grab Tony's alcohol is as good as any." The blonde replied.

Everyone glanced at one another, shot glass in hand, contemplating their decision. "Think of it like a team bonding." Y/n talked again, he cocked his head at Yelena who turns on a song and a familiar tune started playing, a song that would get anyone from any generation dancing (excluding Steve, perhaps). Dancing Queen by Abba.

Y/n had a goofy grin on his face, dancing into the tune, Pietro followed through while Yelena occasionally bopped her head. Sam was the first to grow a grin on his face. Steve, Natasha and Wanda looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "It's Abba!" The falcon said as a matter of factly, he then downed in shot.

"That's the spirit!" Y/n said excited as Sam danced to his direction.

Hesitantly, cap started to walk forward earning a disbelief gasp from Natasha. "Rogers, really...?"

"I mean, I really did enjoyed Mama Mia...." The American boy said with a sheepish smile.

As soon as the lyric's intro came in, Y/n puts an arm around Steve with a microphone in hand. "You can dance!"

"You can jive!" Sam pulled the microphone to himself.

"Having the time of your life!" Those who were already in the circle sang simultaneously, Natasha rolled her eyes but if you squint you could see a tiny smile there. Meanwhile Wanda shifted closer to Natasha watching the group in amusement.

"See that girl!" Y/n pointed at the two, and the other followed. "Watch that scene, digging the dancing queen." He sang, "Come on dancing queens get in here!"

Natasha shook her head fondly, holding back a smile.

"Wanda, Wanda, I know you want to join us girrlll..." Y/n said playfully to his best friend, the boys and Yelena were beckoning her to join. Natasha looked to her side and true enough, Wanda was biting her lips, contemplating whether or not she should join. "You like this song don't lie! Natasha, help me out." Wanda did in fact like this song.

The way her body swayed subtly to the rhythm, her eyes glinting with anticipation, the only thing that's holding Wanda back was herself. Fuck it, Natasha thought to herself. She then held Wanda's arms and dragged her into the group who cheered when they joined. "Wha- Nat, no I-"

"Come on, little witch." Natasha said, turning to face Wanda and raised her shot glass. "Loosen up a bit."

God, Wanda couldn't decline, especially when her crushed smirked like that. They clinked their shot glass and downed their drinks.

------

As the clock got closer to midnight, the more they drank, and the more they drank, the more chaotic it gets. The song they choose ranges to many different genres, in the beginning Pietro and Y/n mostly sang something boyish, like rap or rock. Then as the two gets progressively drunker they sang something what would be describe as 'Girly Pop'.

Steve sang some old 40s song, which was refreshing especially after hearing Y/n's off tune singing voice. Everybody except Natasha was surprised to hear Yelena singing American Pie wholeheartedly, Natasha even sat next to her and sang it with her briefly.

Although the highlight of the night was probably the time Yelena, Pietro and Y/n sang and dance to the song 'Wannabe' by Spice Girls. Natasha had to hid her face with her hand while Sam was laughing his ass off and leaning to Steve for support. Wanda was like a giggling maniac the whole time as she was secretly recording it for some black mailing material on her twin.

Mid-song, Yelena pulled her brother subtly and pushing a very drunk Pietro forward. "Take it for a spin, Maximoff!"

"So, here's a story from a to z-!" Pietro started rapping his part drunkenly.

"She's not drunk enough." Yelena said to Y/n who was trying to stable himself.

"Yep, the alcohol hasn't hit her yet, and Pietro's not going to be much help-" Y/n covered his mouth suddenly as he felt a vomit, he then answered after seeing Yelena's raised eyebrow. "Sorry- Don't worry I got this, hold a bottle."

"Slam your body down and wind it all around!" Pietro continued singing with Yelena twirling his ass in what this generation would describe as 'slay' manner, Y/n drunkenly sauntered over to Wanda who panicked when he started pulling her to the make shift stage.

"No- No, let me go, Y/n!" Wanda protested.

"Just take a shot and come with!" Y/n practically yanked her and they stumbled over to the middle of the living room. "Cheers!" He said while knocking his glass with hers and Wanda finally relents and knocked back her shot.

"-make it last forever, friendship never ends!" Y/n sang while putting an arm around his best friend, Wanda cringes at the bitter taste of the alcohol, she had a few drinks in already but she was never really fond at the taste of vodka.

"Wanda!" Yelena said, suddenly putting an arm around the her as well. "Oh, honey, you emptied your glass already."

"N-no, Yelena, I just dra-"

"Don't you worry, I got you." Yelena said while pouring her another shot, Wanda's eyes widens. She glances to the side and locked eyes with Natasha who raised a teasing eyebrow at her. "Yes, now we cling!" The blonde haired woman said while raising her glass.

Reluctantly, Wanda clinked their glass awkwardly and took a deep breath before taking another shot. She doesn't know how many shots she have taken from that moment, all she knew was that she felt like dancing.

Natasha watched as Wanda's dance move progressively become more fluid and at ease in contrast to her usual shy self. The spy smiled to herself, dance with her. Natasha shook her head at the impulsive thoughts. At some point during the song 'Teenage Dreams' by Katy Perry, Wanda was handed a mic by Yelena. Thankfully this time Wanda was drunk enough not to refuse, and instead grinned like a goof.

When Wanda sang the second verse, Natasha almost lost her breath because she sounded so... beautiful.

"We drove to Cali and got drunk on the beach. Got a motel and built a fort out of sheets."

Wanda sang with her eyes closed, smile on her face, swaying her body to the rhythm. "I finally found you, my missing puzzle piece, I'm complete." The witch opened her beautiful green eyes just to have a similar looking ones staring right back at her.

Wanda giddily approached Natasha and extend her hand, "Wanda-"

"Come onn, Tasha!" Wanda pleaded. Tasha, well that's new-

Natasha hesitantly looked around, the trio were holding onto each other while slurring to the song, Sam had passed out, and Steve... Well, he gave Natasha a knowing look before helping Sam up to his feet and gave Natasha a look that says 'Don't mess this up, Romanoff.' And walking off with a drunken Sam.

"We can dance, until we die. You and I..." Wanda sang waiting for Natasha to finally grab her hand, finally the spy relents and took the witch's offering hand. "-we'll be young forever!"

Wanda practically yanks Natasha into the middle of the living room.

"You make me feel like I'm livin' a teenage dream. The way you turn me on, I can't sleep. Let's run away and don't ever look back, don't ever look back!"

The younger woman puts a hand on Natasha's shoulder, swaying her hips while singing the lyrics. Natasha was unsure if she should put her hand on Wanda, keep it to the side, on Wanda's waist perhaps?

"My heart stops." The witch suddenly tilt Natasha's chin so their eyes meet. "When you look at me," Natasha's breath hitched in her throat, "just one touch...." And the rest of the lyrics seems to died on Natasha's ears as all she could see was a drunken state Wanda making her confession crystal clear.

Wanda turned and moved her body sensually against Natasha, without hesitation, the older woman puts a firm hand on Wanda's hips to guide her moves. Wanda shivered when she felt Natasha's hot breath on her ear. "Imma get your heart racing in my skin-tight jeans." She grabs Natasha's hand and trail it up her body, a silent plea to the older woman to touch her. "Be your teenage dream tonight..."

Fuck... if Natasha had no self-restraint, she would've taken Wanda here and there. "Let you put your hands on me in my skin-tight jeans" Wanda turns around to face Natasha again and this time the younger one guided Natasha's hand to rest on her thighs. "Be your teenage dream tonight...."

The song reached it's mini pause. Wanda, almost in desperation and system full of alcohol wrapped her arms around Natasha and leaned in til their nose was touching. "I want to kiss you so bad..." She whispered.

"I-" The redhead was at lost for words, her eyes looking deep into those beautiful green eyes, searching for any signs of hesitation. Blown pupils were looking right back at her, slowly it travels down to Natasha's lips. Fuck this.

As soon as the song started again, Natasha gently cup Wanda's face with one hand and pulled her into a soft kiss. Oh Wanda's heart could explode right about now, for a second her mind became stone-cold sober so it could remember this moment properly. Wanda drops the microphone she was holding and puts her hand on the older woman's cheeks, using her thumb to caress her soft delicate skin.

"You make me, Feel like I'm livin' a teenage dream The way you turn me on, I can't sleep Let's run away and don't ever look back, don't ever look back."

The two women were now lost in their own world, they failed to notice the cheers from their own respective (very drunk atm) siblings. Wanda was taller than Natasha, but she went on her tippy toes and wrapped her slender arms around the spy. Natasha craned her neck a little, smiling into the kiss, her arms securely on (her) the little witch's waist.

"My heart stops, when you look at me. Just one touch, now baby I believe this is real. So take a chance and don't ever look back."

Wanda felt like she was on cloud nine, feeling Natasha's soft lips on hers. Oh those sweet plump lips she's been day dreaming about for months, honestly, she felt like the main character in a movie. A teenager if you will in a coming off age movie, is this what Simon felt like from Love, Simon? The song was quite spot on, as Natasha made her feel like a teenager once again, or at least what she assumes a teenager would feel. She never really got to properly enjoyed her teenage years, but here she is. With the woman of her dreams.

"We're siblings for real!" They finally broke the kiss after hearing a drunken Y/n made the statement, arms on both Yelena and Pietro who were just as equally drunk as him. Pietro mimicked his sentence, and Yelena only nodded her head while occasionally raising her glass. Natasha and Wanda shared a look as they held each other, the spy snorted while her counterpart giggled at the scene.

It seems like the trio had put Katy Perry's song on shuffle, because the beat to 'Last Friday Night' started playing.

They started chanting "We did it!" matching their words to the tune of the song, the two couple shared a look.

"Do you wanna get out of here?" Natasha asked, a small smile on her face.

"Yes, please." Wanda replied shyly before being dragged out of the living room by Natasha.

-------

The witch woke up groggily on her bed, her eyes needed time to adjust to the light that were peaking into her room. She groaned and fell back onto the bed with a thud, shielding herself from the light like a vampire allergic to it. "Ugh... what did Yelena put in my drinks." She grumbles.

All of the sudden everything came rushing back into her memory like a tidal wave. I kissed Natasha...

She hastily sat on her bed and looked around. She remembered they kissed, but... how did they end up here. Wanda remembered Natasha asking her to move out of the living room, oh my god did we slept together? The witch's face started to match her battle suit as she thought of the possibility, wish I could've remembered.

Her throat felt dry so she decided to grab herself some drinks in the kitchen. And to her surprise, Natasha was already there. Humming to herself and cooking breakfast, Wanda let in a sharp breath at the sight. Of course, being the trained spy that she is, Natasha greeted Wanda without having to turn around.

"Good morning, Wanda. Slept well?" Natasha asked kindly.

"I don't know how you do that." Wanda muttered.

The spy chuckles to herself, "What I was trained for, little witch. I already put a glass of water for you by the table. Bacon and eggs alright?"

Wanda glanced at the table and surely enough Natasha already prepped a big jug of water and a glass for her. "Oh thank you, you're a godsent..." The younger woman took a seat and dawned her water, and then also her second glass of water.

Natasha walked by her and set a plate for both herself and Wanda. "What a night was it?" She said with a hint of tease.

The brunette only nodded her head while drinking her water like it was the last one on earth. She dropped her glass with a sigh of relief and glances at Natasha, a faint blush appeared on her cheek almost immediately. Wanda cleared her throat before answering, "It was, thank you for breakfast."

"You're welcome." She replied simply, her body still angled a little to the side, one arm propped on the head of the chair whilst staring intently at Wanda.

"Natasha, I..." Wanda started, oh god suddenly her throat feels dry again. The spy gave a small nod, urging her to continue. The younger woman started fidgeting with her finger. "I don't regret it," Wanda finally looks at her. "Kissing you, all of it, I don't regret any of it."

A smile tugged the corner of Natasha's lips, but before she could answer, Wanda started rambling on.

"B-but it's ok if you don't feel the same. Or that it was just a heat in the moment kind of thing."

"Wanda, relax." The older woman put a gentle hand on Wanda, she inhaled sharply at Natasha's action. "Listen... I'm no better at this. However, if your interested, I would like to take you out on a date." Natasha smiled at her, oh god, Wanda's heart was beating a mile minute. Wait, wait, she said date?

"I- Yes, I would love that." Wanda averted her gaze, the intensity of Natasha's green eyes was too much. The sheer intensity of the spy's gaze could turn her into a puddle of mess.

"Good, I've been dying to try this restaurant." Natasha said while turning her body now to face her breakfast, she took one bite of the bacon before continuing. "I hope Southeast Asian cuisine isn't too spicy for you." The spy said teasingly.

"Oh please, you underestimate me." Wanda responded with a slight bump of their shoulders, yet a question still lingers on her mind. "Hey uh... Sorry, I was just wondering. Did we uh... do anything?"

"What do you mean? We kissed." Natasha answered cluelessly.

"Yeah, but I remember you took me to my room. I couldn't remember anything from there, so... I was just wondering if we did anything." Wanda asked, her voice progressively gets more timid the more she explains.

"Hmmmm, like what? Watching a movie?" The spy said while looking up to the ceiling as if deep in thoughts, small smirk on her face.

"Tasha, stop messing around." Wanda said with a playful eyeroll.

"Tasha, huh? That's new." She continued to teased her little witch. Wanda playfully pouted her lips, of course Natasha couldn't help but give in to that. "Don't worry, little witch, nothing happened. I took you to your room, we made out for a little bit and before you finally fell a sleep in my arms. It was a adorable." Natasha added the last bit with a shrug and a smirk.

Wanda's face got increasingly red, "Ugh..." She groaned at hid her face in her hand. "I'm sorry."

"Don't hide that pretty face, as I said, it was adorable." Natasha pried away Wanda's hand, the witch relents and was greeting with a fond smile from Natasha. One she rarely saw, god she's so fucking beautiful.

And unfortunately for them, it had to be ruined by the trio... Again.

"Ughh.... my head-" Y/n groaned.

"I feel like skipping gym today." Pietro chimed in.

"Keep up." Yelena responded with a bored tone. She was sweating, probably went on a run.

Wanda and Natasha mentally cursed at themselves and returned to their own respective breakfast. The trio rummages through the kitchen, finding cereals and bowls, Yelena opted for an apple instead. They sat down across Natasha and Wanda, Y/n was first to point out the obvious of course.

"So...?" He asked them excitedly.

"So what?" Natasha raised an eyebrow at him.

Only for him to raised his eyebrow right back, "Did you guys shag?" Yelena piped in, Pietro groaned.

"No, don't answer that-" The older Maximoff covered his ears while Wanda shrunk in her seat.

"I'll take that as a yes!" Y/n yelled excitedly.

"First of all, we didn't." Natasha said firmly, "And second, I don't see how that's any of your business."

"Oh, but it is." The redhead narrowed her eyes at him, but it was too early to deal with her brother's antics.

"Look whatever you saw, zip it." Natasha stated, "I personally want to keep this under wrap, if this goes out to the press they're going to have a lot of questions and I don't want to deal with that."

"I'll second that." Wanda muttered, casting Natasha a grateful look to which the older woman smiled in response.

Y/n scoffed, "Whatever, I'm great at keeping secrets. Beside, I'm just glad the whole sexual tension can now be resolved-" He shuts up immediately upon seeing Natasha's glare.

After a few minutes of silence and eating their breakfast, Y/n's phone notification started going off like crazy. "Oh, Piet I think one of our videos got viral."

"Where let me see." Pietro leaned over to take a look, and upon opening the app, their eyes quickly widens. "Why would you upload that?!"

"I didn't! I must've- Fuck..." Y/n panicked, and by that, really panicked.

"What's going on?" Natasha asked.

"Nothing!" The two men said simultaneously, fuck... if Natasha finds out they're screwed. However, before they could delete the evidence, Natasha snatched the phone from her brother's hand. Wanda leaned closer to take a look and gasped. Yelena only snorted and excuse herself as she had an idea where this was going.

It was a footage of them, kissing, wrap up in each other's arms, lip tight in a passionate lock. Fuck, Katy Perry was right, Pictures of last night ended up online and they were screwed. "Y/n..." Natasha said warningly.

Without a second thought Y/n dashed away from the table with Pietro who zooms past him with his superspeed.

"I'll fucking kill you both!" Was Natasha's last word before hunting them down one by one.

[loving-n0t-heyting]

I'm preaching to the choir here, but what I find particularly Stoopid about Nazi rhetoric around porn is that some of the loudest voices AGAINST porn have been Jewish, including various radfems (Andrea Dworkin, Gail Dines, Ariel Levy) and Ben Shapiro (remember his epic freakout about Cardi B's pussy?). I say this not to agree with Dworkin or Shapiro, but to complain that Nazis fail, as usual, to realize that JEWS AREN'T A HIVEMIND

If i were to steelman the nazis here i would point out that most of these anti porn crusades have been almost entirely futile

In this ofc they contrast with contemporary neo nazis own such crusades, which have been actually entirely futile

[sawthatmountainburn]

@who-canceled-roger-rabbit replied:

THEY SELL HHC IN VENDING MACHINES WHERE YOU LIVE?

CBD too! accoding to the aforementioned gf, it's because the law as written prohibits THC content above some miniscule amount, but doesn't have anything against other compounds(? i can't words), so selling that stuff is perfectly legal.

I feel like a dummy for not accepting my gf's offer to leave one of the hhc vapes at my place, but I feel like if I mention it now she'll get concerned

[queenimmadolla]

Eddie Munson

Dentist

Humorous or comfort I can’t decide 🩵

gave you a little mix of both!

𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩, 𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟

“Baby, c’mon,” Eddie cooed, arms folded over the lowered window and chin resting on them. Eddie was leaning through the passenger side, an over-exaggerated pout on his pink lips, eyes wide and forcibly filled with something you could tell was meant to be innocence, “For me?”

  He even went a step further, eyelashes batting in your direction.

  It probably would have worked had you even been looking at him, but your icey gaze was locked forward, staring out of the dirty front windshield as you remained buckled into your seat even though you’d been parked for a good fifteen minutes. Your arms were crossed and the furrow of your brow clearly displayed your stubbornness.

  “No.”

  You weren’t getting the hell out of that van.

  Eddie sighed, facade dropping as he glared at you, “Baby.”

  “No.”

  “Fine.” Eddie had had it. You’d had a follow-up dentist appointment to your initial check-up, just had to get a minor cavity filled. Only, you hated everything to do with the dentist and had tried to cancel a number of times, always thwarted by Eddie who either walked in right when you were in the middle of the phone call–and always successfully ended it–or stopped you before you could so much as dial the number.

  He’d coddled you and comforted you before the appointment, did the same thing on the way to the appointment after you’d finally agreed to go, and then the moment Eddie parked and got out of the car, you’d refused to exit it. He’d been in the parking lot with you trying to negotiate you out since.

  Eddie reached for your door handle and tugged, glare intensifying in disbelief as it refused to open and he spied your hand moving away from the top of the car door, having pushed the lock in, “You do realize the window is rolled down, right? As in there is nothing present to stop me from pulling the lock up.”

  You finally turned to look at him, holding his stare as your finger moved back to rest over the lock–and stayed there.

“So, this is how it’s gonna be?”

  Sensing what was about to happen, you placed your entire hand over the lock and doubled down by placing the other hand on top of it, “Take me home.”

  “I’m sorry, baby, but I can’t do that.” Eddie went for your hands, easily overpowering your admittedly weak resistance, popping the lock up and the door open.

  You yanked your hands back to your sides, fingers curling to grip onto the seat below you.

  “I'll fight.” You threatened.

  And Eddie knew you would, you’d go kicking and screaming if he tried to force you out, so instead, he went back to bartering as he’d intended. Now, there weren't any barriers between the two of you and he pried your right hand from the seat, raising it to his lips for a kiss and holding it there, mouth moving against it, “Alright, what do I gotta do, huh? I promise I’ll take good care of you after. We can get something to eat–whatever you want–and pick up a movie, or we can go out. Anything, sweetheart. We can go straight home and cuddle after if you don’t want to do anything, but this is important, baby, and I won’t make fun of the way you talk when your mouth is still numb this time.”

  You were scowling, not at him but scowling nonetheless. You hated the dentist, the sensation of having your tooth drilled away was not one you enjoyed experiencing, but cuddling with Eddie was. And you did want to nip this in the bud before it got worse and required more than a little drill. 

  Damn it.

  “. . . Can we get pizza?”

  “Of course.” Eddie grinned, his bright teeth on display for you as he reached to release your seatbelt from the buckle.

  “I wanna rent Who Framed Roger Rabbit and Splash and I don’t want to hear any negativity about Tom Hanks and I require you to cuddle me the entire time, too.” You added as he pulled the belt over your chest before reaching for your other hand to encourage you out of the van. 

  “I’m just sayin’, he–”

  “AND I want a milkshake, too.”

  “Whatever flavor you want.” He promised, intertwining your fingers as he closed the door behind you and the two of you made the brave trek to the front office.

  “Will you hold my hand?” You whispered, glancing up at him with big, nervous eyes. 

  “They’ll have to pry it away from me, baby.” He leaned over, pressing his lips to the side of your head as he gave your hand a squeeze. You knew you’d get through it with him.

  And after the appointment, which had gone by relatively fast, you found yourself cuddled into his side, with his arm holding you to him. An open pizza box rested on the table with two empty milkshake cups near it. He lived up to all except one promise.

“This guy is a doofus, baby, c’mon!”

[random-thought-depository]

I was watching Columbo last night and thinking about this post I once saw about how Tumblr likes Columbo cause it's pretty close to being the closest thing possible to a left-wing cop show and how true that is. Columbo's adversaries are always rich people who think they're clever and underestimate Columbo's intellect cause he isn't rich and he has working class coded mannerisms, clothes, and tastes. This got me thinking about whether an equivalent character could be written today (for something set today, not a period piece) and what they'd be like. I think it'd be tricky cause of how the relationships between class, policing, and partisanship has changed.

For example, it feels like the character/archetype Columbo is most clearly written in reaction against is Hercule Poirot. Or maybe Poirot's knock-offs, in the same way a lot of fantasy isn't so much written against Tolkien as written against Tolkien's imitators, I'm not really into detective fiction so IDK. I think a modern equivalent of Columbo would have to be centrally written in reaction against the archetype of the "gritty" Dirty Harry style cowboy cop who steps on toes and breaks rules but gets results. I think actual Columbo already had some of that in it, but for a modern remake it'd have to be much more central. I'm not sure what that would look like. Though one thing I can picture relatively well is, like, I could totally see one of remake-Columbo's cases pitting them against a murderer who's exactly that kind of cowboy cop but written as a villain.

Also...

An important part of Columbo's character is he's smart but he superficially fits a rich person's stereotype of what a stupid person looks, sounds, and acts like, and this causes his adversaries to underestimate his intellect. I think the tricky thing with a modern equivalent of Columbo would be giving them a persona that triggers similar contempt in people who live in nice five bedroom houses regardless of whether that particular nice five bedroom house has a thin blue line sign or an "in this house we believe" sign on its nice lawn. I'm not sure what that would look like either. One idea I had for is a modern equivalent of Columbo might be a woman who has big breasts and a big butt and is "thick," i.e. has a body type stereotypically associated with strippers, porn stars, and fanservice characters, specifically because of the negative stereotypes associated with that body type - @who-canceled-roger-rabbit, I think you might appreciate this idea!

[cheemscakecat]

Oh… OH.

Guys hear me out… BLU Spy is a film buff who likes the Film Noir genre.

If you haven’t heard of/watched film noir, it’s 40s-50s era detective movies. If you’ve watched Who Framed Roger Rabbit, you basically get the gist of what the genre is like. Jessica Rabbit is a subversion of the fem fatale trope of a shrexy lady who works for the bad guys or is the main bad guy of the movie. Judge Doom is the crooked cop/official, R.K. Maroon is another corrupt party that allied with Doom. And Eddie Valiant is our cynical and jaded detective protagonist.

Now think about movies for a minute. How many times does the protagonist do something impossible because it looks cool? Be honest, John Wick is doing some maneuvers that make zero sense to real martial artists and government agents. Now think about how BLU Spy acts in Em Blue and Meet the Spy.

How many times does a detective/cop/agent protagonist go fight a dangerous person alone, and win? Usually there’s a struggle, but they still win. Spy didn’t though. Imagine he’s having a nightmare where one of the aspects is literally “You’re not that guy pal. Trust me, you’re not that guy.”

This is not the time to make demands, this is the time to shoot the guy with a bigger, faster gun before he can get you. But the good guy usually manages to shoot first or dodge, so he can have the confidence to do something this risky. Except it doesn’t work for Spy.

I can’t help but wonder if one of the reasons is that Soldier is an actual war veteran and not crazy like RED; remember how I mentioned real experts before? What if Solly’s fighter logic is cancelling out Hollywood logic in the scenes where he and Spy are together? Of course, that’s not the only reason why Spy can’t do the cool things he’s trying; it’s insecurity.

What happens in Meet the Spy?

So BLU Spy decided to do the dramatic thing and monologue to his teammates about the RED Spy in base, knowing darn well that one of them is probably said Spy. Carrying literal dead weight with the RED’s weapon lodged in it. With full confidence.

Some people think he knew “Scout” was RED Spy, but I actually think he fell for it. Why else would he say “nothing. Nothing like the man currently inside this building!” and then give said abnormally skilled and dangerous Spy his knife back? And that’s not the only reason he didn’t know, either.

This folder of dirty pictures is BLU Spy’s trump card. Yeah, showing it to RED to humiliate him would be funny… but not the most satisfying outcome. Giving it to the Admin for enemy team blackmail? More satisfying. Giving it to one of RED Spy’s enemies so they can kidnap BLU Ma or study the layout of that room? Devilishly satisfying. But that’s still not his end goal.

Scout is the youngest member of the team with the most to learn. You’re telling me that the same Administrator who hired a Director to get dirt on RED team, and doesn’t even care much for Pauling, doesn’t have two-faced Spies on both sides? BLU and RED teammates willing to sell their team’s secrets for bonuses or their own protection? Oh they exist.

This BLU Spy is not one of these double crossers IRL; but he does look for dirt on RED team. He was probably taking the dirtier pictures to get shot of RED without his mask, but he left it on. But he found out BLU Ma is consorting with an enemy teammate, and that’s very important. He wasn't showing this to Scout just to assert dominance as an older teammate, he was saying “Look, your mama can’t be trusted. Don’t give her your information.”

“PATTY CAKE? PATTY CAKE?! I don’t believe it! [cries]”

“Believe it sister, she played Patty Cake.”

It’s the same thing but more disrespectful, he’s trying to wise the real BLU Scout up about mercenary work.

And before anyone asks, no, BLU Spy is not BLU Scout’s daddy. No sane parent would show those pictures to their child, even if he’s an adult and his mama cheated. Besides that, Spy shows literally zero interest in romance during Em Blue, even when he’s telling Archibald what promotions he wants. That’s… not a normal occurrence in Film Noirs.

I’m not saying getting tricked by RED Spy and loosing those pictures before the real Scout could see them is the reason BLU Spy doubts his own abilities. But it’s at least a factor in the bigger reason.

[ericaportfolio]

Disney's The Gremlins Over the Years

Chapter 1: Gremlins (Part 2)

This is Part 2 to Chapter 1. If you want to read Part 1 first, it's in the link below.

Due to the recent events with Epic Mickey Rebrushed, I thought of making a series of posts dedicated to Disney's infamous characters from the canceled WWII movie The Gremlins. The character designs of these guys have changed many times during the concept art process and over the years. Today, this is a collection of male Gremlin designs. The female Gremlins were called the Fifinellas, which I will get to them in the next post. For those discovering this, in summary, Disney was making WWII movies and shorts for the war effort. They were going to adapt Roald Dahl's first book about these guys, and several things like people getting tired of war movies and figuring out how to make the movie, which was canceled. I'm making these posts for fun and to help give artists ideas for their OCs and fanart. I would post some sample pictures and a minor breakdown in each post. I might miss some because there is so much, so this is just a handful of pictures and photos I collected over the years. We really need to make a Disney Gremlin's Wiki.

Anyways, let's jump into THE FUTURE!

Canceled Live Action/Animated Project (1992): Jumping forward into the future, Jerry Rees, director of The Brave Little Toaster, and Steve Leiva were trying to make a feature based on the original story with live action with animated gremlins like Who Framed Roger Rabbit. The illustrators for the project were Steve Moore and Frans Vischer. Again, GLAD they didn't we didn't get this style of the characters since they're far from the original designs. Here are two samples by Steve Moore.

Return of the Gremlins (2008): When Disney made those terrible DVD sequels, Dark Horse and Disney made a deal to reprint the original book, make merchandise, and release a three-part comic sequel in 2008. The first cartoonist was Dean Yeagle, but he could not finish, so DreamWorks artist Fabio Laguna came in to do the final issue. In this story, Old Pilot Gus's grandson, Young Gus, goes to Old Gus's home in Brittan to handle the property sale. But SURPRISE! It's inhabited by the Gremlins that Old Gus befriended during WWII. Chaos ensues...

Epic Mickey (2010): Now, the moment you've all been waiting for, the game that introduced most of us to Disney’s Gremlins. Here are the variants we remember split into two groups: 3D Gameplay and 2D Cutscenes. Going forward, some of these pictures are from the Epic Mickey Wiki.

3D Gameplay

2D Cutscenes

Epic Mickey Comic (2010): In the 64 page-long graphic novel, the only Gremlin character who appeared in the comic was Gremlin Gus.

Epic Mickey (2012): In the sequel, we get more variants of the Gremlins and a Gremlin Prescott redesign.

3D Gameplay

2D Cutscenes

Epic Mickey Comic (2012): Gremlin Gus was joined by Gremlin Prescott and Gremlin Jamface.

Donald Duck #18 Comic (2015 IDW): This is the crossover we have wanted since the Comic Cover. In a translated European Swedish comic of 'Rue Brittania!', Donald and Fethry get a new assignment: travel back in time to WWII and face the Gremlins to de-gremlin the airfield. Artists: Pencils and Ink by Flemming Andersen and Colors by Digikore Studios.

There's a lot more I could add, but we would be here all day. If this post gets popular enough, I will do more on the side before the game comes out. If there are changes to the Gremlins in the Reboot, I'll make a Part 3. Hope this post is a helpful source for old and new Gremlin and Epic Mickey fans alike!