#whiskersofakitten

[whiskersofakitten]

the love of my life… from whiskers of a kitten

[whiskersofakitten]

Little ways to find light

Be light. When you are a light to someone else, you are really a light to yourself. The proof that there is good in the world, is the very fact that you are in the world. Be the proof

Decide. After you’ve felt the depths of what is needed to be felt, make the changes. Decide to try. To twirl. To smile at a stranger. To move your body. To try. Decide to try.

Create. Find a way to make a mess. Whether that be a pen to paper, a brush to canvas, a recipe in a kitchen… give birth to something. Look how you took something so ugly and made it so beautiful. And even when it’s not beautiful, it is because it’s real. It’s raw. It’s pure.

Remove yourself. The environment that dims your light and perpetuates the darkness isn’t a home. Your closest relationships should be a sanctuary, not a hell. And if you can’t remove yourself, and there’s nowhere to go, return to 1. 

Take a walk. Let your mind wander. See the cute dog with little shoes and smile. At the baby. At the mother. At the trees. At the sky. Remember that everyone is broken and find peace in the very fact that they are still living. And they’re taking a walk. And you will survive

Indulge in whimsy. Say yes to the pink pony chai latte at the coffee shop. Buy the funky hat at the thrift store. Take a sharpie and write a riddle on the bathroom stall. Slice pumpkins with a samurai sword. I saw a man walking around the park yesterday with a giant hand. A prop hand. Like picture a basketball but instead it was a hand. He was holding a hand with both hands. And he also was wearing an eye patch. I can’t make this shit up. But it gave me so much peace. The randomness. The whimsy nature of it. The only thing that saved the Mad Hatter from darkness was whimsy. Indulge in it.

Listen to a song. Read a book. Watch a movie. Find yourself in it. Exactly babe. We are all broken. The exact situation has happened to someone else. And they survived. You will survive. You will dance again. You will smile again. The darkness will stop playing tricks on you soon. Close your eyes. Open them. It’s getting better.

Know that with time, your light will restore itself. It will get brighter. Understand it’s just a little dim right now. Give yourself grace. There is more to you than yesterday.

You don’t have to be dim to be strong. You can be a lighthouse and be strong. You can be a nightlight and be strong. You can be the one light in an empty parking lot and be strong. You can feel the pain and darkness and still choose to be the sun. 

Return to love, return to light. It will be all right.

[whiskersofakitten]

and maybe he just wanted to stargaze.

i am sensitive.

but not in the "takes-everything-personal-why-did-you-use-that-tone?" kind of way.

sensitive like movies touch me in a way that burns or aches, everything is profound and frustratingly sentimental, and the right fingertips on my ribcage can make me hyperventilate.

playing it cool? baby, if i'm playing it cool, i am just cool.

because the last thing a girl like me will do is play it cool.

i'm not nonchalant, i'm vibrant. i'll come into your life and turn it technicolor. listen, confession, i've done a lot of different colored powders. my curiosity is so lethal i can't die knowing i didn't experience every state my body and mind is capable of...yeah.

and maybe that's the difference between me and you. because i believe i could be everything and do everything. i'm fearless with my feelings and honest in a way that scares you. and you'd rather die having not experienced the threshold of life.

and you'll let me go and not bother to fight because i'm too much.

but pretty to watch.

like when i poured my heart out to you and you said you liked that i was so bothered.

and that sent me into an all-out spiral.

and you smiled and i thought why in god's green earth are you smiling like that...

and do you remember what you said to me? you said, "i was just thinking about how pretty you are, let's go outside and call you a car."

and i cried in the backseat and the only thing that comforted me was at least you think i'm pretty.

pretty.

pretty.

pretty.

i guess that's all i'll ever be remembered as, pretty and funny. yeah, you said im funny once. but when you said it, and i asked why you said it was because of my timing. interesting. timing.

that night i couldn't talk right... not because i was nervous, no. it felt like when you're being hunted and finally just surrender.

"like a prey animal that knows it's done running."

to be honest, you looked at me like you wanted to fuck me and i was trying to be offended but unfortunately i looked at you with doe eyes that played the part and you licked your lips and that's when i knew you were the type to play with your food.

and so you let me walk alone... 2 blocks down to my station. yes, let bambi figure it out on her own.

you have this internal time clock that tells you when to go so you never stay and you never walk me all the way.

and maybe it's okay that you just want to stargaze.

and i'm so shiny and bright and all my life i've been called "stargirl" and all my friends compare me to the sun but really i feel like i'm sitting on the edge of the moon, dangling my feet.

and you love it.

and you stargaze. i'm your favorite constellation. pretty, no doubt.

the first time you described us, you said we were star-crossed, to which i replied, "so you think we're destined for doom?"

and you said "no, like kismet."

and i laughed because you taught me something new. kismet is one thing. star-crossed is another. i never corrected you because i knew what you meant.

but baby, star-crossed ends in tragedy. to be star-crossed is to have the stars against us.

to be the greatest love story never told.

and i guess looking back... you said it right the first time.

and maybe it's okay that you just wanted to stargaze.

and maybe it's okay you'll never make it to the moon.

and maybe it's okay because we really are just passing through.

and maybe we were just a star-crossed supernova. star-crossed because we never crossed. saved from the tragedy.

or maybe you just wanted to stargaze,

and i love to romanticize.

and maybe it's nothing special, and i just poeticize.

brutal.

to think if you ever read this, you'd wonder who it was about. that's the thing about you... you always had your doubts.

like the Big Bang,

and astrology,

[and a man on the moon.]

[whiskersofakitten]

It’s funny how my pink nails & pink phone case & pink journal give like I’m not having the most fucked up thoughts in the world

These people are so funny, they think in order to have depth

(I’m about to project so hold on tight),,,

They think in order to have depth… you have to give depth

Like I need to have lived in makeup, ripped jeans, leather, a beard...

And look like I’m in a state of dishevelment.

They see a cupcake and think “too sweet” and not lethal

But that’s the best part!!!

I’m a tea cake at the bottom of a rabbit hole that says “eat me” Welcome to Wonderland baby, I’m so happy you’re here!!!!!!!

And that’s the thing about the Mad Hatter

He’s manic and whimsical and dark 

Just like me

Only difference is I look like Alice

Who? What? Wait, which way do I go?

The actual villains of society are the self-proclaimed villains

Have you ever met a goth with pink nails?

What should we call her?

A whimsy goth? 

A coquette with depth? 

I mean seriously,

The girls that love pink and wear ribbons………….

...

...

...

But that’s the juxtaposition,

That’s what makes life so exciting

There’s something in between good girls

And bad girls

That wear little pink bows…..

They’re a little mad

Hope this helps.

[whiskersofakitten]

from kitty lever

[whiskersofakitten]

the only thing that saved the mad hatter from darkness was whimsy. indulge in it.

[whiskersofakitten]

from kitty lever

[whiskersofakitten]

from kitty lever

[whiskersofakitten]

whiskers of a kitten

[whiskersofakitten]

how could you look at me like that and do nothing about it?

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