#while the goal for now is being able to go outside once a day

[mina-org]

part one - part two - part three - part four - you're reading part five!!

You were being such a bitch.

simon had called endlessly, do you know how annoying getting a new number is? sent texts, sent emails and what did he get back? fuck all.

He knew he was in the dog house but you got a new phone so you couldnt dwell on past text messages anymore but simon knows he was shitty so he starts sending gifts. he can't really remember what you liked, he knows you wanted a fancy baking thing and he couldn't go couldn't go wrong with cash!

Too bad you already brought the thing, at least you something to sell.

Thanks to the the cameras simon also got a front row seat to see as you stuffed his letters into the bin, not even opening them, bit cold love:(

You sigh, closing your eyes as you take a sip of your drink. You've been feeling so bright lately, the last month was fucked, all the stuff with simon and his mohawk maned sidekick, followed by minor stalking and than losing your fuck. it all worked out though.

now you were here! so all that stuff was behind you, now you were focusing on your self, hitting the gym and eating good, deleting social media and focusing on your education, you were even looking forward to go for a food shop, maybe you'd treat your self to a pack of cookies from m&s. While you were with he who shall not be named you felt so insecure, simon had a comment for all it from mocking your avocados and bringing up your failed stint a veganism. just couldn't breathe properly around him.

you're so glad he's gone.

now? peace. bliss.

You knew better now, casual was something you couldn't do. At least simon taught you that.

now your sat in a cafe typing away, sipping on a drink you thought was pretty, everything so perfect!

Until the new barista taps on your shoulder, he explains that your card payments be declined, which is fine! you just got paid, you have money!

your heart beat spikes as it declines, and then again. all you can do is excuse yourself as you check your banking app.

it's all gone. All your wages just disappear.

Definitely Simon's fault, not sure how but you're sure Simon or Johnny will come in and save the day, playing knight. You watch the door but Simon's behemoth form never shows and johnny's jackal like laugh never cuts through the tense silence.

no, they watch from a van outside. both pushing each other to get a better a view, but their effects are fruitless, they can see the outline of you, they're pretty sure it's you anyway. It's not enough to satisfy them.

you stew in panic a little while longer until the barista interrupts you once again. "my mistake love, looks like ya had a free drink on the app." you blink up at him, did this place even have an app? you wanna question but he's already retreated to the counter.

you begin to pack up your shit, you to get this shit sorted. You're grabbed, it's the new barista. at least he's friendly usually the workers are so cool here, it makes you stumble.

"can't forget breakfast love, most important meal 'nd that." you nod, force a smile it doesn't cover the anxiousness and thank him, you're on auto-drive. You wished you be more, you, but can't. you need to figure this shit out.

Soon enough you're on the phone to the bank and they're just saying its been frozen. for fucking fraud.

you cant spend money, withdraw money. literally your money locked away and your bank is useless.

what are you supposed to do?

you were fucked. Up shits creek and fasting being pulled under

they watch as your hands run over your face, you're crying.

Kyle is uncomfortable at the sight, the others are indifferent, Kyle knows it apart of the greater goal but you were glowing this morning, now you were sobbing on your couch, on the verge of having a panic attack.

you scroll through your phone, but theres no one you can call, your closest friend had just stopped talking to you all together and your parents weren't gonna help you, barely being able to afford their mortgage, never mind whatever you were being charged in London, calling them would also just allow them to use it against you in the future.

they watch as you finally open the take out box, hunger and anxiety screaming at you to eat, what the barista had slipped you?, a pastry! score, and a number signed sabre.

sabre. you read it aloud

that a cool name you think to yourself before texting him, you need to thank him for saving your ass earlier and it'll be nice to talk to someone.

simon can't help the jealously that bubbles up. as a phone pings and he knows its not here

taglist: @skeletonsucker @supernova2205 @wh0re4-alexademi @grr457 @gh0st-spid3r @sweetlittleblackrose @aceywaycy @mooievis @theadultoedge @cheese-pull @imtherain@h0e-02 @misscaller06 @lucilleifer @cherryflavoredguts @junitries @aneternallyexhaustedpigeon @drewsphswife @just-lilita @bvrnxy @crempuffie @erintaro @skyfire93 @my-little-evil-blog @alexalix-z @littlemiss-it-girl

[hvnyrt]

Request: Jason is surprisingly affectionate in private

JASON TOOD X GN! READER

SUMMARY: You're tired, Jason takes care of you

WARNINGS: None, enjoy!

WC: 1.4k 

The door to your apartment closed softly behind you as you stepped inside, your body feeling heavy with the weight of the day. Gotham’s chaos had seeped into everything—into your bones, into your mind. You were physically and emotionally drained, barely able to summon the energy to hang your coat or kick off your boots. The city had a way of exhausting you, of leaving you with nothing to give. It had been one of those weeks—long hours, too much stress, too many things left undone.

But when you entered your living room, you didn’t expect to find him here. Jason Todd. You didn’t even know he was coming over.

He was sprawled out on your couch, leaning back with one leg draped over the side, his arms crossed over his chest as he stared at his phone. There was a mug of coffee on the table in front of him, untouched, cooling. The lights were low, casting a soft glow that made the apartment feel more like a refuge than the outside world ever could.

You paused for a moment, not wanting to disturb him—until you noticed the way his posture changed when he heard you enter. His eyes flicked up from his phone, a flicker of surprise crossing his face, quickly replaced by something softer, more concerned.

"Long day?" he asked, his voice quiet, low, the usual edge replaced by a gentler tone.

You nodded, dropping your things in the entryway with a tired sigh. “It’s been a week,” you muttered, rubbing your eyes. “I’m... exhausted.”

Jason didn’t respond right away. He just looked you over, his eyes narrowing slightly as he registered the exhaustion on your face, the way your shoulders sagged in defeat. He was used to seeing people at their worst, but he wasn’t used to seeing you like this. Not like this.

“Come here,” he said, his voice no longer playful but soft, almost commanding in the way he said it.

You glanced at him, too tired to argue, and slowly made your way over to the couch. Jason shifted, sitting up straighter, making space beside him. Without saying anything, he reached out and pulled your legs onto his lap, arranging them carefully like he was afraid you might pull away, like he was trying to be gentle with you in a way he wasn’t always.

“Sit,” he repeated, this time with a soft insistence, as if his only goal was to make sure you found some comfort.

You hesitated for only a moment before sitting down next to him, sinking into the couch. He gave you a small, almost imperceptible smile before grabbing the blanket from the back of the couch and draping it over both of you. The weight of it was comforting, the fabric soft and warm. His arm naturally settled around your shoulders, pulling you closer, a silent invitation to rest against him.

"You’re too stubborn," he muttered, more to himself than to you, but the words were gentle, like a small reprimand for not taking better care of yourself. His fingers rubbed at the back of your neck, slow and soothing. "You push yourself too hard. You need to slow down."

You leaned your head against his chest, letting out a soft breath, feeling the warmth of his body seep into yours. The exhaustion was still there, but now it felt distant. For the first time all day, you didn’t feel like you had to be on alert. With him beside you, the weight of everything seemed lighter.

“I don’t know how to stop sometimes,” you whispered, your voice barely above a murmur. “I just keep going. Even when I’m running on empty.”

Jason didn’t say anything for a while. Instead, his hand moved from your neck to your back, rubbing in slow, comforting circles as if trying to ease away the tension that had built up over the course of the week. You could feel the softness in his touch, the way he wasn’t rushing to do anything—just being present.

“You don’t have to do it alone, you know.” His words were quiet but firm. "Let me take care of you for once. Let me help."

You swallowed, your throat tight at the unexpected vulnerability in his voice. It wasn’t often that Jason opened up like this. He had walls, thick and impenetrable, built from years of hurt. But tonight, he seemed to be letting those walls fall, just a little.

His hand slid down your arm, pulling you even closer to him, until your head was tucked under his chin. The rhythm of his breath steadied yours, and you felt something in your chest—something warm and soft—begin to unfold.

“You’re always the one taking care of everyone else,” Jason said, his voice barely a whisper. “But you deserve to be taken care of too. I’m not going anywhere. Let me help.”

You closed your eyes, trying to push away the tightness that had settled in your chest, the overwhelming feeling that had accompanied the last few days. But his touch, the heat of his body against yours, seemed to make the anxiety fade away, leaving only calm in its wake.

“Thank you,” you murmured, not sure if you were thanking him for the moment of peace, or for his willingness to show up when you least expected it. But the gratitude was there, unspoken but felt all the same.

Jason didn’t respond. Instead, he reached over and grabbed your tea mug from the side table, gently pressing it into your hands. “Drink. It’ll help you relax.”

You took the mug, the warmth of the tea seeping into your cold hands. You sipped it slowly, savoring the way it warmed you from the inside. Jason sat quietly beside you, his fingers still tracing small, comforting patterns on your arm as he watched you. There was no rush, no pressure to talk, to be anything other than what you were in that moment. He was giving you space to breathe, to let go.

As the tea worked its magic, you felt the tension begin to melt away. Your eyelids grew heavy, your body sinking deeper into the couch as Jason adjusted, his body angling closer to yours.

“Lie down,” he said softly, shifting you slightly so you were resting more comfortably on the couch. “You need sleep. You need to rest.”

You didn’t argue. It was too much to argue with him when you felt this good—when his care wrapped around you like a blanket, giving you the comfort you’d been lacking.

He rearranged the pillows behind your head, making sure you were propped up just enough. His hand was never far from you, always resting somewhere on your body, as though he couldn’t quite stop touching you. He wasn’t smothering you, though. It was a subtle, gentle thing—just enough to reassure you that he was there.

You closed your eyes, your body relaxed in a way you hadn’t felt in days. The weight of the world was slowly lifting, and with Jason beside you, you felt safe.

“You don’t have to do anything,” he murmured, his voice low and steady. “I’ll be here. Just sleep.”

You nodded, too tired to say anything more. His hand shifted again, this time moving to your cheek, brushing a stray hair away as he gently cupped your face in his palm. His thumb traced over your skin, soft and slow, and for a moment, it felt like he was taking in every detail of you—every part of you that had been worn down, that needed healing.

And then, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, Jason leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to your forehead. The touch was tender, almost reverent, and when he pulled away, you could feel the gentle brush of his breath against your skin.

“Sleep,” he whispered again, the words a soothing balm.

Your eyelids fluttered closed, and you let yourself drift into sleep, the warmth of Jason’s presence grounding you, keeping you safe in the quiet moments. As you drifted off, you could still feel the steady rhythm of his hand on your back, the softness in his touch, the care he was offering so freely. You didn’t need to say anything more. Tonight, Jason had given you what you needed most: peace, tenderness, and a reminder that you weren’t alone.

[heartmix]

Messed Up - Joe Burrow

Pairing: Joe Burrow x fem!reader

Word Count: 3k+

Warning: swearing, mentions of s*x, joe's an ass in the beginning and also dumb, driving while on the phone (focus on driving!) angst but fluffy ending

A/N: cleaned out all my wip and deleted around 50 so i could motivate myself to write more. found this gem while i was cleaning

Masterlist / NFL Masterlist

He didn't mean to make you feel like shit. Really. You were the most understand person in the world especially when it came to his job. If he told you that practice was shit and that the winning drought was getting to him then you would've understood, but he just had to say,

"You're a distraction, you need to stop being all over me I can't focus on work."

That one sentence sent everything into a spiral. He regretted it the moment he said it, apologizing as soon as the last word came out but it was too late. The sad eyes mixed with the anger radiating from your body was evident.

"Hope you can focus for Tennessee." Was all you said before grabbing your phone and rushing to the guest bedroom before joe could get you from not locking the door.

Tennessee being venom on yours lips was a reminder that he had an early flight in the morning for this weekend's game. Of course he had to go and say some stupid shit knowing he wouldn't be able to see you till Monday.

His sleep was absolutely shit. He fell asleep outside the guest bedroom hoping in the middle of the night you'd crawl back in bed or open the door and take pity on him, but you didn't. You slept the whole morning. Even when he had to leave. He screwed up. The texts and voice memos he sent you piled in like a train that morning. In every way he could say sorry he wrote and said. He even made sure flowers and breakfast was on your doorstep before he boarded the plane.

You weren't completely heartless, you knew he regretted what he said, but that didn't change the fact that he said it and looked like in that moment he meant it. Not wanting him to have an even more terrible practice and even worst game you caved into the texts, sending a picture of the flowers with a

'Thank you, it's beautiful. Have fun in Tennessee'

Joe felt a wave of relief seeing your text come in. He knew it wouldn't make up for everything, but at least you weren't ignoring him. He was going to take as much as he could get until he saw you on Monday.

Over the next two days the texts were dry on your end. Just simple replies to his texts and pictures here and there of your day (when he asked). Those two days he was thinking of ways to make it up to you. All of his troubles washed away seeing your Instagram stories before the game. No matter how mad you were you still supported him (even if that wasn't your team).

Bengals got a win off the titans, a close game that was decided by a last second field goal. He was grateful for the strong wind and his kickers experience with wind over Tennessees'. He played a hell of a game, scoring 2 passing touchdowns. Seeing your celebratory stories made him feel even better. He thought everything was going to be okay once he got home.

Sure you loved supporting him every chance you got, but that wasn't the entire reason you posted about the bengals win. It would be suspicious if you didn't. Texts from friends who knew you all to well would roll in with

'you and Joe okay?'

'Joe piss you off?'

'Tired of the bengals?'

You didn't want that. You couldn't handle that right now. You got your anger out of the way and all that was left was irritation. Irritation with what Joe had the audacity to say that to you and Irritation that he couldn't just tell you he wasn't in the mood. He made you feel like a slut and that was the last thing you wanted to feel in a relationship with one of the biggest quarterbacks of this generation.

Monday morning rolled around and Joe couldn't be happier to be home. He couldn't wait to tell you all about the win and hear your praises. He loved hearing your insight after game day, especially over a game he knew he played great in.

When he walked in the house he expected the usual greeting and excitement from you. But it was silent. You didn't work today and even if you did you worked from home most days so you'd take a short break to great him. The whole house was quiet, not even music blasting from the speakers. The more he traveled in the house he finally found you in the walk in closest with your earphones in. You knew he was home evident to the notifications your got from the doorbell camera, you just didn't care to meet him at the door to greet him.

"Hey mamas." You felt his hands snake around your waist as he buried his head in your neck.

"Hey. Great game. The plane ride okay?" You asked pausing the current song so you can show some decadency in paying attention to him as much as you didn't want to.

"Yeah. The win made it easier to fall asleep for a bit." He mumbled in your neck. The reminder that he won hit you right in the chest. Maybe he did win because you weren't a distraction this weekend.

"I bet, at least you got some rest."

"Yeah but now I'm home and I couldn't be happier to be here." All you did was hum at his response as you continued to sort your clothes.

"What are you doing?" He noticed you were making an overnight back.

"Staying at Milla's tonight. She wanted a girls night with just us after we were with the girls all yesterday."

"Oh." Was all he could get out. He was confused. Obviously you could make plans whenever you wanted it's just you rarely made plans when he came back from a road game. You dedicated that day to him and him only. He loved those days even after a win, even in a lost you'd spend it in bed watching film and helping him analyze the games.

"Don't forget to put your laundry in the basket." You turned to him patting his cheek before grabbing your bag getting ready to head out.

"Wait! Whats the matter?" He chased you out of the closet with a confused look on his face.

"Nothing? I going to the store to grab dinner so I can cook at Milla's. She's in the mood for my cooking."

"Okay. So I guess I'll see you tomorrow?" His signature pout made its way onto his face. Normally you couldn't resist it, but today you really didn't care what face he was making.

"Mhmm."

"Bye i love you, text me when you get there." He came up to you planting a kiss to your lips deeply with you barely reciprocating it back.

"Will do." You gave a fake smile to him before leaving the house.

You didn't come home the next day. In fact you stayed one more day at Milla's with the reason being that Milla tired you out at the mall and you didn't feel like packing up everything from the tiredness. When you came back Wednesday morning Joe just got back from his morning work out but could tell you were in a rush.

"Hey! Woah in a rush?"

"Heading into work today. Got a new project." You replied swiftly has he watched you get undressed and dressed in front of him. Every ounce in his body wanted to take you in front of the mirror, but with the look on your face and your pacing he knew you were in a hurry.

"Oh okay. I was thinking dinner tonight with Sam, Ja'marr and Tee? Said they missed your cooking."

"Yeah sure. I'll text you when I leave the office." You smiled grabbing your work bag off the bed and rushing out the door before Joe could even pull you in for a goodbye kiss.

The only thing joe could think about all day was you. He couldnt wait till you got home and have you to himself, even though he needed to wait a few for you to play host. The text came in 2 hours after the boys arrived and they were well into a game of 2k. Screaming and jabs made them forget about the food that was promised.

'Hey sorry on short notice staying late tonight. New project is big. Tell the boys I'm sorry and that I'll cook for them next week. Don't wait up for me.'

'It's okay mamas, don't work yourself to hard. I love you'

All he revived was a heart reaction and no follow up text. He found that strange, but put it off as you were focusing on your work. He understood that. Quickly ordering some takeout the boys didn't mind hearing that next week they were for sure getting your cooking.

Joe didn't even know when you got home last night. Having the boys over drained him so he went to sleep earlier then he thought, he tried to stay up to wait fr you but failed. So to his surprise you weren't even in bed when he woke up. You weren't in the bathroom either. When he made his way downstairs he saw you already dressed for the day washing your finished coffee cup and making a new batch to go.

"Hey I didn't hear you get in last night."

"Yeah I crashed on the couch. To tired to go upstairs." Which had some truth to it. He knew you loved the couch so it wasn't strange you slept downstairs.

"Already heading out?" He asked coming up behind you circling his arms around your waist burying his head into the crook of your neck.

"Just for a few hours. Want to understand the project to I can bring it home for a few days."

"Mhmm, sounds good I missed you home." He mumbled still being comfortable in the crook of your neck.

"You need to get ready for practice and I need to run." You gave him a tight lip smile before rushing out with your coffee and bag in hand. No goodbye kiss, not even a goodbye in general.

He knew something was up, but couldn't figure out what. This whole week since he got back you were short with him. He wasn't even sure he saw you for an hour combined this whole week. The three men who were over that night could tell Joe was deep in his thoughts.

"What's got you all depressed?" Expressed Ja'marr as they were taking a break on the bench. 

"My girl. I haven't even seen her for an hour combined the whole week."

"Woah what did you do to piss her off." Next was Sam who spoke what everyone was thinking.

"Nothing I think? When I got back home she was running off with Milla for a sleepover and that turned into 2 days. When she came back the next morning she was rushing to get to work and stayed overtime which is why she didn't have dinner with us and this morning she was up and out when I woke up. I got two sentences out of her before she rushed out. No goodbye or even a kiss goodbye."

"Oh my guy you messed up big time." Tee said chuckling at the mans stupidity. He didn't know exactly what his teammate did, but knew it was his fault.

"I don't even know what I did! She wasn't like this before the week-" he stopped in his tracks now realizing what could be the cause.

"What did you do?" Ja'marr said knowing that face Joe made all too well.

"Before we flew out, the night before I told her that she was a distraction to me and that I couldn't focus on work with her being all over me." The QB hung his head wanting to knock himself out.

"You gotta be kidding me man."

"You blamed her for your shitty work performance?"

"Oh my god. I didn't even notice. I didn't think she was mad anymore after she was posting about the game on Sunday." Joe was now frantic. How could he have not know sooner.  

"Dude she posts every game it would be weird if she didn't." Tee said the obvious thing that Joe didn't seem to notice that it would be weird to everyone else if you didn't post.

"I would even question why she didn't post." Sam shrugged being the dude less on the internet out of the four. 

"Holy shit I'm a terrible boyfriend."

"Yeah you fucking are." Tee got out a little too fast.

"Wow thanks guys."

"It's your fault I didn't get her cooking last night? Unbelievable." Ja'marr exclaimed making Joe roll his eyes. Of course that was all he focused on.

"So how are you going to make this up?" Sam spoke seeing his friend stressing out.

"I don't know. But I need to do something before she comes home."

As soon as practice ended he rushed home having no time to waste. On the drive home he managed to order food from your favorite restaurant, have flowers delivered to home and a bag you've been eyeing for months. He was going to wait till Christmas to get the bag, but what better time than right now. As dangerous as it would be to be on his phone while driving he checked your location every minute to make sure he would make it home before you. Just as he reached home it was when you left your work place. He hoped you'd come straight home and not make any detours. 

He worked fast, putting the flowers front and center on the kitchen counter, unpacked the food and put it on plates and finally placed the Dior package next to the flowers. Smiling at the little set up he looked at this phone seeing he had time to get dressed up. Sure you didn't mind the sweatpants and a bengals shirt but he didn't feel like it was the most "i'm sorry" fit. 

Walking through the door you let out a sigh. As much as you wanted to avoid Joe more you couldn't help but admit you missed sleeping in your own bed especially with him in it. Maybe you should let up on your semi silent treatment. Your thoughts were paused when you heard your playlist coming through from the kitchen. Peaking your interest. Turning the corner you found Joe standing all dressed up with a goofy smile on his face.

"What is this?" You inquired placing your work bag on one of the free counters.

"A sorry, a i messed up and i didn't realize it till now."

"Joe-" you started before he cut you off.

"I missed the welcome homes, i love you's and the way call me by a nickname instead of Joe. I was stupid. i thought everything was okay with what I said to you last week but it wasn't. Trust me when i say i didn't mean it. This is no excuse, but it was an in the moment thing. I know my performance was shitty these last few weeks and that my day was bad and that was no excuse to take it out on you when you were only trying to make me feel better. I also know that i should've just came to you. The most understanding girl i know, especially when it comes to my job. I don't know what else to say besides i'm sorry." he got out all in one breathe which shocked you. He wants one for a grand speech, but he was pretty good at it.

"It took you almost a week to realize something was wrong with me." you still didn't want to let down your guard, you were going to milk him for everything he had to say.

"I know, I mean i knew you weren't alright since i left, but i guess i let the praise you gave me online clouded everything. Sorry it took me so long to realize."

"You know you made me feel like a slut. like all i wanted from the new hottest quarterback was sex. normally you like to take your mind off of work when it affects you that much but i was wrong and i'm sorry for that."

"Don't apologize. i never meant to make you feel that way, you are not a slut. you've been there for me since my first year at LSU. how could i make you feel any less." He said pulling you into an embrace which was much needed for the both of you.

"Do you forgive me?" He mumbled in your hair making you giggle at how whiny he sounded. 

"I do, and i missed you."

"I missed you more then you could ever know, this past week was worst than my losing streak."

"I doubt that but ill take it. now whats all of this?" You pulled away looking at the little fixture on the kitchen island."

"food from the place you like and a little gift."

"A little? It's a Dior package."

"Open it." he begged you.

Reaching over to the bag you didn't know what was going to be in it, Joe's love language was for sure gift giving so it was always a surprise. When you opened the box you gasped at the bag you've been eyeing out for months. You didn't even tell Joe about your interest in the bag. When you looked back up at Joe he had the signature smirk on his face. 

"How did you know?"

"I pay attention believe it or not."

"You didn't have to." You pouted up at him for the sweet gesture. No matter how many gifts he would shower you with it still caught you by surprise everytime.

"I wanted to. I was going to get you it for christmas, but i have enough gifts to spare." he said as a smirk creeped up on his face.

"You're unbelievable." You laughed pulled him down by the jacket he was wearing to plant a deep kiss. He couldn't help but bring you closer. Right when he was going to lift you up on the counter you pulled away.

"Food is going to get cold." You reminded with a smirk of your own making his drop.

"I haven't touched you in so long." he growled out making you laugh.

"Could've had sex the night before your flight and sex this whole week but thats on you." You said patting his chest as you made your way to sit on the barstool.

"Oh you're never going to let that go."

'am i getting my dinner next week?'

[lavenderhateswritting]

I’ve always like the idea of Batdad working at the Asylum when he and Bruce get a divorce but then one day on patrol Batman gets hit by a fear toxin and Robin is not around so the Asylum picks him up and Batdad helps him

The days drag on in Arkham Asylum. It is a monument to the grim state of Americas mental health institutions. Everyone thinks that Arkham Asylum is filled with the worst of the worst and sure the Joker and his ilk have graced the halls more times that can be counted, but there are people here real people who needed real help. Nobody wants to give them that help though to scared of the possibility of murderous psycho clowns and not worried nearly enough about those who have no one else who can help them.

You weren't a fighter, but in these halls you could find some way to help even if it was just a little. Helping people through their wost moments and helping them get their lives back was the ultimate goal and you worked at it everyday of your life.

Of course the main trouble makers could never give you a break. Scarecrow had decided that he wanted to break out and gassed the entire asylum as a parting gift. Great just fucking great. Now you're stuck in your office with a gas mask on trying to wait for the air filters to kick in and finally filter out the fear gass that had been released.

You needed a plan for tomorrow. So many mentally fragile people who were exposed to fear gas made to relive some of their worst traumas once again. You reached to pinch the bridge of your nose before you realised that the gas mask was still on your face. You needed to start thinking about what you would have to do to help your patients through these next few days of recovery.

A pounding sound at the door of your office forced you out of your thoughts. That wasn't right. The all clear signal hadn't been gven over the speaker which meant that Batman, Robin, and Nightwing hadn't contained Scarecrow and it wasn't safe to come out of your office yet. No one was supposed to be able to get this far into the building during a lockdown. You were trapped in your office with no way of getting out.

The pounding at the door continued louder and louder almost frantic at this point like whoever was on the other side was desperate to get in. God what if one of your patients had been left trapped in the chaos of a breakout. High on fear gas with no idea what was going on or where to go. Then again it could also be one of Scarecrow's goons trying to rip you a part and display your head on the gates outside.

You were going to have to make a decision though because whoever was out there was going to break the door down and then you'd have no way of keeping yourself safe during this breakout.

"Y/N!" Was yelled from the other side of the door followed by more crazed pounding. "Y/N! Please" You froze. It was Bruce and he sounded scared, desperate even. This could still be some kind of trick, but the situation was beginning to become more and more clear.

You inched your way towards the door just as you heard what sounded like something or someone being throw at it at full force over and over and over again. Bruce was throwing his body against the reinforced door. Bruce who was trying to stop Scarecrow with Damian and Dick. Bruce whose voice wasn't muffled through a respirator or gas mask. Bruce who was probably high on fear gas right now. Bruce who you haven't seen or spoken to in nearly 5 months.

"Batman is that you. You need to stop." You finally said while you stood around 6 feet from the door.

"Y/N! Y/N I'm here I've got you, I'm going to save you this time I promise." His voice was shaking like he was crying and couldn't hold his calculated facade any longer.

"Batman I'm fine, but you need to stop tryin to break down the door okay I-I'll open it and let you in okay, but you need to calm down." Your hand is hovering over the locking mechanism for the door not bad considering it's been able to hold off a berserking Batman.

"I'll save you, I'll protect you I promise." He sounds like he's having a breakdown on the other side of the door, but at least he's stopped trying to break the door.

You unlocked the door and then finally turned the knob. The door almost immediately collapsed inward because of Bruce's weight leaning against it you were never a weak man, but he was 6'3 and 200 lbs. When he finally realized that he was standing in front of you Bruce tackles you to the ground almost immediately.

You yelp as you're forced underneath the sheer mass and size of him. He's looking down at you now his cowl was still on, but his mouth was completly visible so you were right then no respirator or gas mask.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry I couldn't protect you I'm sorry." He's crying and tears are starting to flow down past the cowl and he's trembling on top of you.

"Batman I'm right here see I'm okay." You try to reassure him, but it's nearly impossible.

"No, no I couldn't save you, I couldn't protect you, all I've ever been good at is hurting you. You were right." He's dropped his head onto your shoulder and now his entire body is covering you completly.

"Bru-Batman you're just not well right now do you have an antidote for the fear gas." You've started to drop your hand down to his utility belt trying your hardest to reach towards the areas where you remember him keeping his antidotes only to find them completly empty.

"No, I'm a failure of a man I couldn't even keep you safe." Okay then Bruce isn't going to be of any help then what else could you do.

"Batman do you have your comm still on." You ask him if you're lucky his comms still on and you can let whoever is on the line know that he's in your office and needs an antidote. Bruce, however, has gone nearly completly nonverbal and is simply shaking and whimpering on top of you.

Okay one last thing you can do then. You reach your hand slowly along the edges of the utility belt until you finally found what you were looking for. An emergency beacon. You click it and then allow yourself to relax where you were. There was nothing you could do, but wait here for help to come. You reached up and began to rub slow circles into Bruce's back as you waited for help to come. You don't even think he could feel it mostly it just made you feel like you were actually being useful in some way.

Finally after what felt like hours you felt the presence of two people in the doorway to your office that you hadn't been able to close when Bruce came in.

"Welp, I guess that does make sense." You heard Dick say from the door way. "Sorry about this Y/N we lost track of him and couldn't get in contact." He's walking closer and until he's finally bending down in front of you in the Nightwng costume with a respirator over his face.

"Its no problem Nightwing just please give him the antidote and get him off of me. I've lost feeling in my legs." You can see the smile begin to spread across Dick's face when he looks at you two together God this was all so much easier when you didn't have to interact with Bruce.

"Come on lovebird time for your medicine." Dick said as he pulled a syringe out and pulled down Bruce's cowl. He injected the antidote into Bruce's neck and then turned to call toward the other presence in the doorway. "Robin come help me get him back to the batmobile okay."

So that's who you felt in the doorway the new Robin pads over towards you and Bruce.

"Tcht. Father this is unbecoming of a man of your standard." You can see him out the corner of your eye the grumpy little face he has on reminds you so much of Bruce it nearly makes you want to vomit.

"Don't judge him to hard Robin fear gas makes you do crazy things." Dick says. He's pulled the cowl over Bruce's face and has begun the process of pulling him off of you.

"Come on Bruce up we go now." Dick has had to physically seperate Bruce's arms from around your waist and is now trying to keep him from wrapping back around you. When they're finally up they slowly start to shamble out of your office together as you begin to pull yourself off the floor.

"I am to understand that you and my father have seperated because of me." You nealry jump out of your skin. You really weren't expecting Robin to still be standing next to you. Dick nearly drops Bruce on the floor out of shock. "Robin that was out of line."

"Its fine Dick really." You look Damian in the eyes. "Is that what he told you?" You can't see the his eyes under the domino mask, but you're almost certain he's rolling them.

"No, but I'm not a fool I know that you were there before my arrival and then you filled for divorcr after I had begun to live in the manor." He talks like a little gentleman it makes you smile a little.

"I didn't leave because of you Robin. I left because of him no one else was at fault and you are a child you had no say in any of this."

"I am no child do not treat me as such I understand more than you likely do. If you do not wish to admit the truth then fine." He turns then and stomps past Bruce and Dick.

"I'm sorry about that. We're still trying to teach him how to be a lot gentler with his approaches." Dick says.

"Its nothing Dick he's a child I understand." You turn your head out the window and can finally see the beginnings of the sun coming up over the Gotham skyline. "It was good to see you Y/N call me sometime you were like a father to me to you know."

"I will Dick I'm sorry"

[heartfullofleeches]

[Angst]

Childhood Best Friends with a small age gap- two or three years, nothing crazy- but it means everything as they age.

It was hard for them to make friends their age when you first met. They liked things that were too "childish" for their peers - things another child who lived not to far away adored. They'd seen each other on the way to school, but they didn't interact frequently due to their difference in grade.

Until that day-

"Whoa...Cool backpack. You like that show too?"

"Thanks... I'm thinking of getting a new one though... Do you want me to ask my parents if you can have it?"

"What?! It looks fine to me... Why are you getting rid of it?"

"My friends called me a baby... I won't be able to go back to class without everyone laughing at me unless I get a better one."

"That's silly!.... It's on right now... Wanna watch it with me?"

The two were inseparable from then on- School hindered the time they had to see each other each morning, but as soon as it let out - both ran to meet with their new best friend. The elder of the pair was often mocked and teased for their choice, but they could hardly care anymore. They had someone who'd stick by their side to the very end - childish fixations and all.

Years went on and they made new friends. It happens. More obstacles began piling up throughout - chipping away at the few hours they scarcely had to begin with. Studying, Hobbies, balancing days between hanging out with other friend groups and the person who once meant the world. They tried to make things works, but nothing went to plan-

"Is it alright if Y/n comes with us tonight?"

"Y/N? Aren't they're too young to see this movie? We shouldn't be responsible if they have night terrors or something.."

"They aren't that young... Are they?"

They never thought about it before. You were so close in age as kids it never hit them that as you grew that little gap drew a bridge between you - and it was easier to let you go than finding an alternative.

"Hey, Dude! Are we still on for this weekend? I can't believe they're making a reboot after all this time!.."

"Are my messages going through? You haven't responded in a while... I saw you outside school yesterday and yelled your name, but....."

"Did I do something wrong?"

"Hey."

"You're hanging out with them today? Did you forget about my birthday?...."

"You removed me off your list of friends...We're still friends, right?"

"Let me alone. I'm sick of being your babysitter. Go find friends your own age and stay away from mine."

And that was the end of things.

College cames around and their live became relatively tame. Their thoughts drifted to that childhood friend of theirs every now and again, but between school and partying with the new friends they had made - those memories faded to the back of their mind.

An acquaintance asks them to help show some new faces around the campus. One sticks out to them amongst the crowd. It's you. What do they say to you after all these years? You don't look sad to see them. Nor angry. Intact - you look..

Relieved.

Pulling them aside at the end of the tour, you free yourself from the burden that's weighted down on you since they left you.

"I'm sorry."

"It was never my intention to hold you back. Overtime I realized I was just that annoying kid who clung onto you because I thought you were my first and only friend...When you never felt that way about me. I'm sorry for taking that away from you. If our paths cross again, I promise I won't even look at you."

After being abandoned by your best friend- the person you looked up to most, you matured well beyond your years in hopes that would make you like them again. Overtime, you gave up that goal, but others could see how you've changed.

"Isn't that.... Y/n?.."

"Oh, man- It is! You guys were glued at the hip before we became teens."

"They're..kinda cute... Do you still have their number?"

All this time apart, a feeling long forgotten resurged inside them. The need to protect you. You didn't know these people like they did. You shouldn't be going to parties with them, getting to know and befriend them. They'll only hurt you - worse than they had. They never should have said goodbye to you- They should have allowed the feelings they were so scared to have, but had always been there develop and blossom naturally until you both were adults ready to move on to that stage in your friendship.

They know you best. No matter how much you grow as a person, you're still the same.

"That's a cute Keychain, Y/n!"

"Thanks! I've loved this show since I was a kid!"

They'll prove it to you.

[fourgods-nobrakes]

I've been seeing people make references to Fulgrim's pre-Crusade relationships on Chemos for a while now, and finally had to post about it. Because some of the things I've seen are really exaggerated ("he had 20 wives") and almost all of them miss an important nuance:

“A wise man, your husband.' Fulgrim sat back. 'I was betrothed, once,' he continued idly. 'Several times, actually. Political marriages, of course. Made to seal binding agreements, or open negotiations with certain executive dynasties.' Pyke didn't reply. His tone had become sombre. A rare thing, for Fulgrim. The Phoenician seemed to always be smiling, laughing at some joke only he understood. But now, he seemed tired. He rubbed his face 'I outlived them all, one way or another.' 'Did you love them?' Fulgrim smiled slowly. 'Some. I think. At first. After a time, I stopped. Love was a weakness I could ill afford in those days. A billion lives rested on my shoulders, and any hesitation on my part would have doomed them all irrevocably.' He laughed softly. 'Or so I told myself then.' 'And now?' 'Now, I know it would have. There is no room for weakness in this galaxy. No room for imperfection.”

Fulgrim: The Palatine Phoenix, Josh Reynolds

That's it! That's all we get. He doesn't use singular pronouns; he doesn't ever say "wife" (or "husband"). The text is ambiguous.

"But with no further information, the assumption is that m/f--" I am begging you, and many other queer people on this website are begging you, to not make that assumption. Please. For reasons much more serious than a pulpy sci-fi canon.

"Okay but surely in a political marriage--" Political marriages are historically intended to produce heirs for the political entities involved, so they require people who can reproduce together. Primarchs are functionally a different species from baseline humans, so genetically and physiologically distinct that they're not going to be able to breed outside of fanfiction. Fulgrim COULD still have married exclusively female partners, but there's no actual benefit to it.

"This doesn't mean he has to be gay." No, it doesn't! It just also doesn't mean he has to be straight. Also bisexuality exists. Given that the author has put a lot of queer characters of various kinds into his original work, I think it's entirely plausible that he wrote this scene with attention to detail and didn't nail it down on purpose.

This scene doesn't tell us whether Fulgrim had marital relationships with women. This scene tells us that Fulgrim had personal relationships while being a political leader, and he has struggled with how to love individuals while pursuing world-spanning goals. It's an early look at one of his crucial themes: what will he give up to achieve what he wants?

AND it leaves the door open for everybody's headcanons about what he likes in bed.

[doremimosasol]

𝐋𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭 - 𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐨 𝐑𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐥𝐞 ๋࣭⭑

warnings: suggestive (trying to get into it more please forgive me), swearing

word count: 0,7 k (just a small one this time :))

a/n: thank you so so much @slytherinslut0 for proofreading this and giving these amazing adaptions, I love you <3

Oh, Mattheo was always so goddamn needy. 10 minutes until class? Not ideal. But Mattheo did a lot of things far from ideal. Once you gave him the chance to lay his hands on you, he never stopped.

How you’d finally gotten here was almost mind-boggling to him after months of just trying to get you to look at him, months of wondering how those delicate hands of yours would feel on his body. However, it was more than that. He didn't only want your touch on his skin, he wanted it on his soul. Gods, he’d never craved someone as much as he craved you.

And no matter what he did, he couldn’t control himself. Thoughts running wild when he stared at his ceiling, finding their way back to you without failure. His mind was consumed by thoughts of you. It drove him insane, resulting in endless sleepless nights.

Oh… but when he finally got you to look at him, when he finally got you to speak to him, the thoughts only got worse. You were definitely interested, it must be. Were you though?

To him, it seemed all too coincidental. You woke at the same time as him, and ate breakfast at the same time as him—your minds must be connected. You went to the library at night, you must've known it was a habit of his too. Take the same routes as him? Gosh, you must be in love with him.

But maybe you actually were falling for him, you saw him more than you saw your own friends. Everywhere you were, he was. Coincidence? Hell no. Schedules of each other in the back of both of your minds.

It didn't even take a month before he had you pressed against the wall of one of the broom closets. Hot breath, fervent fingers, charged atmosphere. You wanted each other. He was hastily moving his hands over your shirt, cursing it for getting in the way of his goal.

"For fuck's sake, let these buttons open up already."

Warm breath hitting your ear while he let his hands travel everywhere they shouldn't be. He was so hot, everything about your interactions was hot. Fingers inching closer to the place where you desperately needed them most.

You two never kissed though, the contact of lips unnecessary in the heat of those moments. It would make it feel too real. Because if you didn't kiss, nothing happened right? You could just go on with your lives until the next time.

And that's how you both acted around each other outside of the places and moments he worshipped your body. No traces left on each other, a secret.

10 minutes until class, enough time to get your high. For each of you to get your fix. But not nearly enough time to calm down—both still on edge in class. The steady yapping from the professor at the front was not even remotely being absorbed. Eyes glued to each other, unable to wipe the feel of fingers on skin from your minds. The heat of each other's eyes reflecting the heat that you both now so desperately tried to cool down.

And every time it became more real, the passion was not only present in those rooms but now when you both were around each other throughout the day. The nagging feeling. The emotion undeterred.

You knew it was over when you two finally kissed. You were in far too deep to turn back now. Because it already felt too real, and you both knew it. Once you started, you couldn’t stop — not doing anything other than kissing that night. Trying to make up for the time you waited.

Bodies moving in sync, not even able to catch your breath. You felt out of this world. Yet he was still by his senses, still making sure his body was driving you to your high. Once he heard the familiar sound of your moans he knew, he once again succeeded.

His breath hitting your ears, burning your skin. "Let's make this fucking real, yeah? Be my girlfriend, please be my girlfriend." He was begging... or demanding?

Of course, you said yes. You finally caught your breath, only for it to be taken away once more — and more and endlessly more times.

[not-quite-normal]

Hii! First of all, how are you? I would like to ask you what path you took to get to where you are now: working in the world of animation for big production houses. I’m very curious! Thank you so much if you will answer! 🙏🏻

hi, thanks! currently enjoying my canada day off from work weirdly in the middle of the week (had to work yesterday haha)

i feel like i've talked about my career journey before but i can't find it in my animation question tag, so sure! i'll start by saying that no one's path is the same; everyone that i've ever talked to has a different journey so best not to compare yourself to others and instead focus on being the best you that you can be.

for school, i went to capilano university's two year 2D animation program. when i graduated in 2010, the industry was in a big lull (similar to now) with not many jobs available. a few months passed without being able to find any work, when i got an offer from one of my previous teachers for a job a 3D show at bardel, a studio in vancouver that he worked at. i went to school for 2D so i didn't really know how to use maya haha (i had dabbled with it a bit in high school) but i went for it anyway. they let me learn in the office on my own time with help from a couple of the leads there and it was very overwhelming!! i was having severe doubts, that i was in over my head, i didn't know what i was doing, etc. but once i got into production, i had the most patient lead that helped me through my shots and i eventually made it to the end of the show. they kept me on for the next show as an anim revisionist, and then the next show after that was TMNT 2012! i didn't think they'd want to keep me on for such a cool show because i was still so inexperienced but i understand now it's because i was cheap labour lol (i think i was earning something around $600 a week at this point).

i worked on TMNT for about 5 years. working on a show like that for so long really let me do a lot of growing. every episode was a chance to look back and go 'okay, what can i do better this time? how can i set shots up to make my life easier when i animate them? how do i set this up in case i get notes about the action here? which shots can i choose to spend a bit more polish time on and which ones are more filler shots?' as with anything, getting good at stuff just requires a lot of practice! and TMNT gave me a loooooot of practice haha.

during my last year of TMNT i wanted to get more into feature animation so i took an iAnimate online course where i learned a lot about acting, working from reference, and developing an eye for more feature level polish.

from there i moved on to work at a couple of other tv studios in vancouver while i worked on my reel, but i ended up back at bardel for dragon prince. i only worked on a couple episodes of that before getting into sony though. i've never wanted to leave vancouver and i didn't want to work in vfx, so sony was really the only goal for me, even though at the time the most recent movie that sony did was the emoji movie ahaha, at that point i would have been stoked to be hired for emoji! i kind of lucked out that we ended up doing all these amazing and groundbreaking projects. i was hired to work on smallfoot, which was being done alongside the first spiderverse so the world didn't really know what imageworks was cookin at that point.

i was happy to just be an animator and had no ambitions of a leadership role. i ended up being pushed into it even though it was outside of my comfort zone, but as with my very first job, that feeling of being overwhelmed went away with practice and i love it now 8)

[74thcookie]

Brainrot part two

Bear with me guys my brain is not silencing for some reason and I can’t draw this due to school. So I’m just going to write it so I can share it.

This one is related to the SMilk Brothers particularly the Sage. When I said in the last post he’s part maybe similar to the CondensedMilkAU..yes probably.

-start-

In the beginning Sage and Fount work in the same school. Fount was loved and admired by all, Sage cannot deny that nor he is against the idea because he too admire his brother’s wits and intelligence but also his grace.

For years they raise the university they work in into what it is today which is a very well respected university with the goal of knowledge and finding one’s true self in life.

As the demands of the schools need increase so does the workload of the brothers. Fount was excellent as expected, all jobs were finished in one swop till one day an unexpected event happened. That event left Fount brutally wounded while saving a student.

The families of the students were outrage such an event happened and the school with all its title and glory failed to prevent such matters.

The fount manage to fix the issues with both the parents and the school staff which amazes the people and gain their respects once again but due to his wounds he cannot continue his role as the principle hence he needs to resign. People especially students were sadden by his resignation and no ceremony was able to be held since the moment it was announced he retired. Rumors says the principle vanish without a trace, no one knows where he went not if he is still in the country.

Sage was left and questions are given to him about the Founts whereabouts but all the Sage could answer is silence. Making the people think the fount had died from his wounds and mourns for him.

The Sage then continue to take care of the school but a bit more stricter due to the event. Though the goal of knowledge is still there and the value of truth is still recognized, the Sage put those two missions of the school to the absolute extreme without him realizing his adjustments for safety is such a restraint in the students freedom and their mental state.

Nurse Recluse and the Counselor Vanilla were the ones who made the school breathable for the students to study in. Word of mouth spread, opinions are shifted and the environment changed a lot as the years passed since Founts resignation.

Rumors says that the Sage has gone insane due to the loss of his brother hence his strictness. Doesn’t help he has a demon of a little brother but it’s not an excuse for him to be a terror teacher. The Nurses disapproval and distaste for the Sage gave the campus a signal of validation of that rumor being real.

The Sage caught wind of the rumors but don’t mind it because it’s not true. The Fount is still alive but his wishes of living in peace is now being respected. Nurse Recluses distaste/distain for him isn’t without it’s reason since he is the brother of the one who bullied him back then, bias are bound to happened even if they never interacted but the opinions of his teachings was the one to hurt him. He didn’t mean to make the student feel so pressured and yet it’s not easy to change the curriculum or its plans that fast. Time isn’t with them to redo the whole thing.

As the school year ends. The faculty had a meeting in where they reprimanded the Sage for being a stain on the school reputation and his brother’s legacy. The Sage can only do is agree to all, he knows all their words are facts. He loves his students and teaching, he will do anything for them but his only one guy, and is already burnt out. The counselor in the meeting advise the Sage to have a break since he knows his been working one stop for years. The Sage was appose to this idea since he doesn’t have hobbies outside of teaching. The counselor remembers when they were kids he would show them the arts and how it heals their souls, maybe finding a hobby related to the arts can be a start.

The Sage happy to see the counselor still remembers his teachings which he ironically forgot. He accepts the break and off he goes.

During his break everything slowly dawn on him on how tired he became, he cried to his brothers on what he became and other irrational words come out in which his brothers told him it’s alright. They know his out of his senses and his brain finally got time to breathe. The youngest of the brothers drags his brother to binge watch videos with his since he knows if they watch a movie he’d go straight to critiquing the whole script. Videos like reactions and vlogging is something Sage can’t critique since it’s a live reaction and cannot be controlled or scripted, though when the youngest introduce the world of Vtubing, all hell breaks lose. The Sage never seen such tech before, motion tracking?, live-streaming using such features, model illustrations and so much. He has to study it. The youngest feeds on to the Sages hyperfixation and tells him that most people do this for escapism from IRL things and get to social with people under a new identity.

A new identity he says?, the idea of it intrigues the Sage. It’s like playing as an actor from a stage, a secret identity where he can act as someone else outside of the people’s gaze. His already well-known and now he wonders if his natural charisma can gather the same audience but somehow he wants to use this new persona as a form of comfort for those students who suffered in the hands of teachers like him. He knows if he apologizes to the students with his current reputation right now, it will feel dishonest.

Hence he made the persona of Mama Berry.

He made sure the model to craft the perfect woman. One who sounds and looks pleasant but also something he knows he can cosplay as if he accidentally got his camera on showing his actual face. The perfect disguised.

Though he hates lying, using his disguise made him feel free.

Time flies so fast. He return to work and his demeanor still as strict but fun as ever. Students and staff do miss him and welcome him back, though there is still some people who ain’t but he doesn’t mind because those same people are enjoying his little persona he created.

-end-

Welp that’s all my brainrot.

[beomev]

𝘄𝗶𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗲𝗹𝗹, lee sanghyeok

리우────𝗁𝗈𝗐 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽 𝗂 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗄 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗂 𝗀𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗐𝖺𝗌 𝗲𝗻𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵?

𝗿𝗶𝘄𝗼𝗼 x reader ⠀⠀⠀⠀─── ⠀⠀⠀⠀𝘄𝗰 1.2k ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲 angst(?), sad ending ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗹𝘂𝗱𝗲𝘀 both reader's and riwoo's pov, reader is described as extroverted, mentions of food ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀𝗽𝗹𝗮𝘆𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 mess it up by gracie abrams ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀 not proofread, inspired by this prompt, i hope this is not too confusing!! ⠀⠀⠀⠀𓂋 ⠀⠀⠀⠀❛ 𝗮𝗿𝗰𝗵𝗶𝘃𝗲

You wished he’d play with you as you sat alone during playtime, while all the other kids rushed towards the outside field as soon as the bell rang. You sat alone. He sat alone, not batting an eye, not a care in the world. It’s okay, though.

You wished he’d talk to you whenever you scurried off to sit next to him, your Totoro lunchbox in one hand. You’d do most of the talking, “..and then my mom put me in timeout just because I had one too many sweets! Can you believe that?” you’d huff. But he’d just nod along, like he didn’t care. It’s okay, though.

You wished he’d look at you at least once, you expected he would, at least at high school, because you look at him, you steal glances whenever he's not looking. The way he’d write down his notes, the way he’d answer any question, the way he’d smile at all the other students. But he wouldn’t even look past your direction. It’s okay, though.

You wished he’d at least open the packet of sweets you kept on his desk whenever you spotted him feeling down, at least more than usual. But he wouldn’t. He’d be observing them for a moment, but in the next, he’d shove them down his bag as if you didn’t notice. It’s okay, though.

You wished he’d notice you when you'd participate in class more than usual, whenever you answer questions, or try to help out by collecting the books. But he’d look out the window, the field, the cherry blossoms blooming. You’d try multiple times to catch his attention, but all your attempts failed. It’s okay, though.

You wished he’d care about you as much as you do about him. He’s going to Hanlim University, you heard from one of your friends. You decided then and there that your goal would be to go to the same university as him, to broaden the chances of being with him. But he didn’t seem like he knew. It’s okay, though.

You wished he’d notice how hard you were working to be able to do well on the entrance exam. You worked day and night, stayed in school for over ten hours, preparing. But you were determined, because he was there too, in spirit at most. He was your reason, he just didn’t know it yet. It’s okay, though.

You wished he’d also look at your name on the entrance exam results sheet as you looked for his. You looked for his name before looking at yours – he was the role reason you applied either way. Accepted. You couldn’t help but smile; you had plenty of time with him now, even if he didn’t seem to care. It’s okay, though.

You wished you’d bump into him on your first day of the university, you got in – just for him. You looked around, multi-coloured balloons taped to different stalls. The loud chatter of the seniors and juniors filled the area; some rushed to sign up for all types of clubs, but you weren’t there to find your club. You were there to find your Riwoo. You spot him with someone else. Someone you couldn’t recognise, a girl, seemingly older. She hugged him, and he hugged back, flashing a smile you’d never seen before. A smile that you thought was reserved only for you. The world stopped as you stopped in your tracks. Turns out he wasn’t your Riwoo. It wasn’t okay.

Riwoo wished you’d come up to him. He looked your way, you were busy toying with the orange truck on the hard, yellow-coloured mat while he stayed in his seat. He didn’t want to go up to you. It’s okay, though.

Riwoo wished he could talk to you as you talked to him. But, he couldn’t help but look at you with heart eyes as you rambled on and on. He couldn’t tell you what you said, but he could for sure tell you that you wore red that day. She does this to everything, he thought. He thought about what made him special – nothing, really. It’s okay, though.

Riwoo wished you saw the radiant glow you brought into every class you walked in. He’s dodging your eye contact, feeling his face burn up too obviously. But, he’d notice the way your eye sparkled as you giggled with your friends, and that was quite enough for him to be happy – even if you didn’t talk to him. It’s okay, though.

Riwoo wished every time he saw a packet of sweets on his desk that it was you. He’d frantically search for any sort of note or letter attached, but none were found. He’d shove the sweets down his bag whenever he didn’t find a note. Why would he ever accept anything from anyone who isn’t you? It’s okay, though.

Riwoo wished you’d realise how cute you were. Every time you got a question wrong, the way your face would form a little pout, your pen placed on your chin as you sank down in your seat. Every time you’d walk to his table to get his book, he’d try to pass it while looking at you, but he just couldn't. So, he’d just look outside and try to organise his thoughts, his one-sided love. It's okay, though.

Riwoo wished you’d find out about his aspirations. He felt his heart skip a beat when you announced that you were going to Hanlim University. He didn’t really have much of a reason to go, but now that you were, he most definitely could not pass up this opportunity – even if he wasn't your sole reason. It’s okay, though.

Riwoo wished at every wishing well that you’d do well on your entrance exam. It seemed like he was more worried about you than himself. Even if he didn’t make it, you had to. But, as always, he tried to keep up with you. He’d spend many nights in the school’s library, trying to get his head around all the content – but all he could think of was a chance to get close to you during your university days, even if you weren’t too keen on it. It’s okay, though.

Riwoo wished that you’d make it. He made it to school as early as possible so that he could look at the results sheet before the hallway started to crowd with all the other students. He frantically searched for your name first – Accepted. He sighed in relief, happiness buzzing out of him. He happened to make it too, but he was happier for you, even though you didn’t seem to ask him about his results. It’s okay, though.

Riwoo wished you’d made it in time to the university’s first day – but it got too crowded by the time he reached there. “Hey,” he heard his sister say, “Congrats on making it!” she added, handing him a bouquet. He recklessly smiled at all the photos taken, he didn’t want to be late. He wanted to find you. He bid his farewell to his sister, sealing it with a hug, and rushed towards the centre of the university. He swore he looked around every corner, but he couldn’t find you. Perhaps Hanlim University was a second option for you, like he was to you? It wasn’t really okay.

Guess all the wishing wells you visited didn't matter.

Guess all the wishing wells he visited didn't matter.

ㅤ⠀ㅤ ིྀㅤtaglist: @daydreamnet @blossomnet @a-dream-bookmark @k-films

ㅤ⠀ㅤㅤ⠀ㅤㅤ⠀ㅤ﹔℘๋࣭ ⭑ send an ask or just comment to get added

[ywpd-translations]

Ride 824: The assist's smile

Pag 1

1: The two guys from Hakogaku are passing the puddle!!

3: There's a gap between them and the three people ahead

It's 2, 3 seconds!!

They're already 1km away from the finish line

A distance of three seconds right before the finish line.....

Pag 2

1: We caught them

2: it's a desperate distance!!

Pag 3

1: Hakone Academy!!

Pag 4

2: Three people in the lead!! Gunma, Kyoto! And now Chiba's Sohoku too, they're taking the curve!!

Gooo

Kyofushi!!

The second curve.... this is the last curve!!

3: Once they pass that, it's basically just a straight road to the finish line!!

4: Pedal, Sohokuu!!

The guy from Gunma is so cool!

Pag 5

1: Once we pass....

2: this curve....!!

3: This is the final curve!!

7: I see it!!

Pag 6

1: The goal gate!!

Pag 8

1: 600m left until the finish line!!

2: Woah!! That's the road racing's Inter High's goal gate!! It's my first time seeing it!!

3: Vic...tory!!

Pag 9

1: I'll deliver the jersey that was entrusted to me!!

2: I'll definitely do it!!

3: -tory!!

4: Yon!!

8: This gate....

Pag 10

1: will prove if what I've learned during this past year was correct

Pag 11

1: It's the gate of judgment!!

2: The three people in the lead entered the straight road and are accelerating!!

They're so fast!!

Gooo!

Pedaaal!!

3: Calm down, my heart!!

4: I'll take it!!

I will!!

5: This is a road race's finish line!!

I can't help this burning feeling!!

Pag 12

1: Finally Hakogaku has also entered the final curve!!

2: A three seconds difference in the final curve, it's impossible!!

Something happened and they got a late start at 1km left? What a careless mistake!!

3: The race for the finish line is narrowed down to the three people ahead!!

Hakogaku can't make it anymore!!

Pag 13

1: They're saying horrible things about us, Jou-san

Let the outsiders say whatever they want

2: From a safe place protected from wind and rain, it's impossible to understand the subtle tactics of the battlefield

The verbal spears of a person who doesn't fight every day are rusty and rotten

3: Ah but I told you before

In road racing

4: “Those who have a larger number of people have an overwhelming advantage”

Look

5: All the other team have only one person, but Hakone Academy, in front of the finish line, has...

Pag 14

1: Two people?

2: I've told you this already, but when a body moves faster than 25 km/h, it will definitely feel the air resistance

And bikes move at 40/50 km/h are constantly pushing away air particles while moving

3: The theory that “riding behind a bicycle is easier”

4: is because the air particles pushed aside won't hit the person in the back

5: It's the same thing as hiding from the wind in a pillar's shadow during windy days

6: So of course the person in the back has to endure less fatigue

“There are two people”, means....

Pag 15

2: it means that we will send a less fatigued ace in the pack in front of the finish line!!

3: The reason we didn't follow the other three at the curve at 1km left was

4: to be able to take the technical curve safely and accurately without being hindered!!

The seconds of difference.... it's easy

Pag 16

1: I'll just pull and close it!!

3: Alright, Yuuto!! Here it comes!!

Pag 17

1: We can go into zone 5!!

2: Yes!!

3: Move ahead once I give you the signal!!

4: What

Hakogaku is accelerating!!

The assist is pulling up!!

5: Hiaaaa

6: Go, Yuuto...

Pag 18

1: Be proud!! Of the bib number 1 you're wearing

Pag 19

1: Go and take the finish line!!

Pag 20

1: Yes!!

Pag 21

4: He's here!! Hakogaku!! In an instant!!

6: 500m left!!

[sweetbans29]

Mascot - KM

Pairing: Kate Martin x Reader

Summary: Kate had is down bad for the school mascot (based on THIS request)

Warnings: complete fluff

Word Count: 2.3k

Sweetbans Masterlist

Your love for being the school mascot began in high school. It was junior year when you were asked to cover for one of your best friends - who was actually the school mascot at the time. At first, you were nervous but once you were in the suit, you were a natural. You became your high school's mascot senior year and went out for it when you started college.

It was almost like having an alter ego. Outside of the suit, no one would ever picture you as the school mascot. You kept to yourself and really focused on your academics. Most of your time was spent in the library or on your favorite lawn on campus doing schoolwork or reading. If you were ever on the lawn - some of the cheer girls would come up and study with you, but never enough to seem suspicious as to why they were hanging out with you.

When you were in the suit though - your confidence soared (I mean you were a Hawkeye). It was like you could do anything and interact with anyone and that is what you did. The whole school loved you - at least the masked version of you and that was more than enough.

What was nice about how the school did Herky the Hawk was that if you were chosen to be the school mascot you would be one of many. Even though it was all under one character, the person in the suit varied depending on the sport. When you went out for the position, they chose you for all home basketball games. Basketball was your first choice and volleyball would have been your second - you had no desire to be the football mascot.

It took your freshman year to really adjust to working and being a student. But now in your junior year, you had become a pro. Not one person, aside from your boss and the cheer squad, knew you were the mascot for the basketball games and you fully intended on keeping it that way. At least that was your goal until a certain dirty blonde-haired girl started interacting with you a little more.

It started with little asks every once in a while. Kate from the women's team would pull you aside right before games and have you hide somewhere in the tunnel exit to scare her teammate Jada. You had never spoken to her - not able to reveal any part of your identity but would never fight her excitement of scaring her teammate.

The first time she had asked you will always be your favorite.

You were already dressed up and ready for the night when Kate made her way to you. You were by a group of cheer girls when you felt someone grab your arm.

"Hi, I have a favor to ask," Kate says.

You cock your head to the side to signal your curiosity. Kate takes that as your interest and continues.

"I was hoping you could help me scare one of my teammates. She got me kind of good the other day and not that I am keen on revenge, I want revenge." She says with a smile.

You nod and point your finger down, asking if this is something she wants to do now.

"Ya, now would actually be perfect. She is getting ready to come out and do her shoot-around." Kate says and you move your hands as to gesture 'Show me the way'.

She leads you to a spot she had scoped out earlier in the day, it is the perfect little nook for you to hide in. She tells you to wait there and you do.

A few minutes pass and you hear Kate walking out with Jada. Once you see Kate pass you jump out and scare Jada - causing her to scream and freak out.

You and Kate are laughing uncontrollably as Jada comes back to her senses, hitting Kate telling her she is going to pay. She then turns to you and you put your hands up as if to show innocence and she just points a finger at you. You bring her into a hug and pat the top of her head - the best 'apology' you could think of.

Jada runs out to the court, leaving you and Kate in the tunnel.

"Well done, I think that did the trick," Kate says with a little laugh.

You nod.

"Oh! I am Kate by the way. I don't think I have ever introduced myself," she says with a shy smile.

You wish you could tell her your name but that's not an option. You settle for extending your hand to shake hers which she reciprocates. Before letting her hand go, you bring it up and act as if you are kissing it which causes her to blush.

Then with a wave, you head back out to the cheer squad.

Since then, you have become the basketball team's go-to for pranking each other. Kate had unintentionally started a war. Kate had roped you into scaring Jada several times after the initial scare. Other girls from the team also enrolled you to help them. You had helped Jada get Gabby a few times. Hannah had asked for your help getting Jada. Caitlin even came over once asking you to help her get Kate. It had become somewhat of a home game staple.

About halfway through the season, you roped one of your girls in to help you figure out how to ask Kate out. The only reason you had felt so bold to do so is because Kate made it a point to come up and see you before and after every game. Since you couldn't talk to her - the two of you came up with a pre-game handshake as your way of telling her good luck. Then she would always find you after telling you how great of a job you did pumping up the crowd.

One of the cheer girls had come up with the idea of getting Kate your number. It wasn't anything crazy but it opened the door to actually getting to talk to her. You weren't ready to fully come out and expose yourself yet but you loved the idea of getting to text the girl.

It was right after a home win that one of the cheer girls went up to Kate and started talking to her. You tried to busy yourself with taking photos with students and high-fiving the players but you couldn't help but keep an eye on the interaction. You watched how your friend talked to Kate and passed her the little piece of paper that contained your number. The smile on Kate's face was contagious and you could have sworn you saw her cheeks grow a pink tint. Kate looked over at you and you gave an awkward wave. She waved back and thanked the cheerleader.

She texted you that night and the two of you have been texting for the last few weeks. You still had not revealed who you are to her and it was driving her crazy.

"This girl has me falling head over heels for her and I still have no idea who she is," Kate tells Caitlin as they are driving to practice.

"Well, have you asked her?" Caitlin says as if it was that simple.

Kate turns over to her best friend with a 'you can't be serious' look.

"Oh, that's a good idea! I haven't thought of that," Kate says sarcastically as she hits Caitlin's arm.

"Hey! I am driving!" Caitlin says seriously then breaks out into a laugh.

"Well, what do you know about her?" Cailin asks, turning into the parking structure outside of Carver.

"This is her third year as the mascot, she spends a lot of time studying, and she likes the outdoors - she says she goes on walks a lot. She grew up in Iowa, born and raised. Her parents since then have moved out of state. She is huge on cooking." Kate says.

"Well, that last one is a huge plus considering you can't cook for shit," Caitlin says.

"Okay, okay, this isn't about me, this is about her," Kate says.

"Did she at least tell you her name?" Caitlin asks grabbing her practice bag from the back seat.

Kate shakes her head no, "When she is ready she will. Until then, I will just have to wait." Kate also reaches back and grabs her stuff. "She is worth the wait."

The two of them walk into Carver.

"The last thing I will say is that she has the most beautiful laugh. I have heard it a few times now and it is one of the best things I have ever heard. I don't think she knows I have heard it but I have and I try to get it out of her every chance I get. That's how I know she is worth the wait." Kate says as Caitlin pats her friend on the back.

Over the next few days, you can Kate continue to text nonstop. It is almost too distracting to you at this point as you are starting to head into finals. You told Kate you were going to need some uninterrupted time to study and she respected that.

You were in the library with a few of the cheer girls when you needed to take a break. You decided to go on a little walk to clear your head and stumbled across a mama duck and her babies. You stood there and watched them swim around, seeing the ducklings get in little fights with one another causing you to laugh.

Your laugh didn't go unnoticed as Kate was walking to the library to get some of her own studying done before practice. When she heard the sound, it stopped her dead in her tracks. Her head turned to find the source of her favorite sound.

She saw you standing there looking at the ducks and immediately felt her hands clam. This was the moment she had been waiting for. She walks up to you and gives you a little tap on your shoulder. Your head turns around and you look up at her. Your eyes widen and you stand there speechless.

"Hi," Kate says, all confidence lost the second her eyes met yours.

"Hi," you say back. The two of you stand there just taking in one another.

"It's you," Kate says. A blush creeps into your cheeks as you feel completely exposed without the suit on.

You nod and extend your hand to introduce yourself, captivating Kate even more than she already is.

"How did you know...how did you know it was me?" You ask stunned.

Kate looks down, rubbing the back of her neck.

"Well, your laugh kind of gave it away," she says. "It has become one of my favorite sounds."

Now it was your turn to looks down or really anywhere but her eyes.

You ask her if she wants to join your study group and she does. As you sit there and do work, you glance up at her often to admire her. She is adorable when she is focused. You have seen it time and time again on the court but sitting up close and personal with her now - you are able to see just how cute she is. You look at her and admire how she didn't run when she found out you were the one behind the mask. How she took a step closer to you and looked at you with such loving eyes.

Kate looks up when she feels eyes on her and catches you looking. She gives you a soft smile and you return it. Usually, you would be embarrassed about getting caught staring at someone but with her it is different.

The two of you spend the summer getting to know each other more. Kate would take you on dates and want to spend as much time as she can with you. The two of you would work out together and read at your favorite park (usually resulting in a nap). The summer ended with a week trip to the lake before your guy's senior year. It was the best summer you have ever had.

As school began and basketball games resumed, you went above and beyond to show your love and support for the team. Dating Kate had sort of opened the can of worms of the team learning you're the mascot. They were super hype about it and that caused you to go even harder during games. They all kept your confidentiality out of respect for you and Kate.

In one of the games, you went a little overboard when Kate hit the buzzard-beater shot to win the game. You came up and picked up your girl, running her around the court. She couldn't stop laughing and held onto you for dear life. When you finally put her down you give her a hug, whispering in her ear how proud of her you are.

The rest of the season was no different. You continued to support Kate on the court and would love her even more off of it. Her love for you never ceased to grow as she would catch snippets of you cheering her team on.

Kate looked over at you getting the crowd hyped for their game and just stood in awe. She thought back to when she asked you to help scare Jada in the tunnel that one time - the first time she heard you laugh. Never in a million years did she think that she fall in love with the girl in the suit but is beyond grateful that she did.

AN: CUTE! I hope this was a nice little fluffy one for you. Let me know what you think! And as always, thank you for your love and support 💛

[viviiyon]

[ Clover Plush Update! ]

Initially started & released the interest check on twitter, but I feel it'd be good to also post updates here going forward!

(image above's shown only as a prototype, the manufactured sample is still on progress)

Disclaimer! At any stage before the goal is achieved, this project is not guaranteed to be set to fruition. This can be because of the risk of MOQ not being met, or other issues that may arise. Rest assured, I will keep frequent updates on the process as well as being open to answer any further questions. If the preorder goal is not met I'll be refunding everyone so no payment is taken unless I can guarantee production.

Revised /slightly more detailed timeline

Sample downpayment So far I’ve made the downpayment for the sample and the manufacturer is currently working on it! They said it would take roughly 30-35 business days for it to be complete.

Updated references I’ve also made an updated Clover plush reference sheet for them to use and I’ll be putting them here aswell! (regular & alternative outfit below!)

Flowey plush accessory replacement Regarding the usage of Flowey on the Clover plush, I’ve contacted Fangamer and since the production is on a slightly larger scale, I’ll be replacing the Flowey plush alongside the main plush with a pin instead (so you’d still be able to clip it onto Clover!)

Addition of the magnetic gun accessory Due to popular demand from the interest check, I’ve requested the manufacturer for a mini gun accessory that can be attached to the hands! (it should also be in the reference picture above)

Fixed cost The plush now has a fixed planned cost of $25 for the base plush with the main outfit, and $40 for the variant including the alternative outfit!

Platform plan While previously I mentioned I’d possibly use kickstarter, due to being based in Indonesia, there isn’t support for that platform here, so I’ll most likely be using Big Cartel for the preorders! (Unless there is another promising alternative)

Updated shipping estimate I’ve made some rough estimates in USD (keeping in mind weight & size). If you have any questions regarding shipping to your country unspecified below, lmk!

USA - ~$22

North / South America - $22-30

EU - $20-30

Asia outside of SEA - $20

Within SEA - $10-15

Once again if you have any questions feel free to ask them! (and especially here too since this is the first I'm posting about it on tumblr-)

[ilikekidsshows]

What Marinette and Sakura had is similar but different that I find it pretty hilarious. Marinette is being hyped as strong female lead, best Ladybug and best Guardian when those are lie. While Sakura from Naruto is being trashed for being trash and useless when those are lie. Like sure, Sakura in s1 isn't really that good. The only good thing about her is her cakra control but she didn't stop there, after Sasuke betrayal she become determined to be better so she would be able to help her friends and she end up being a great medic ninja. While Marinette is being hyped for no reason but gaslight the audience. What's she's good at? Designing, sure. But in the superhero side? There's nothing in there that worth the hype.

---

The Sakura thing is extra wild, because the canon doesn’t have characters constantly saying that Sakura is useless regardless of all evidence to the contrary, the fandom decided that on its own. Also, like, hot take, but Madara Uchiha sucks in all the ways the fandom insists Sakura sucks but people insist he’s totally cool and not a loser. It just goes to show you that, once a fandom has convinced itself of something, there’s no changing so-called “common knowledge” aka “popular opinion”. And that’s what the take that “Marinette is a good person and a competent hero” has degraded into: just a popular opinion that has very little basis on canon.

Don't get me wrong, Marinette has shaped up to be an awful hero based on morals, but she’s also just plain bad on an observable competence basis. Astruc insists that she is the lone hero while Cat Noir is her sidekick, meaning she should be on the level of Batman or Spider-Man. Trying to claim that either of these heroes couldn't win without supportive characters coming in to prop them up every step of the way would be ridiculous. Yet, Marinette constantly needs to be propped up by her sidekick Cat Noir and other characters too. She’s constantly having nervous breakdowns she can’t overcome without someone else coming over to give her a pep talk. The main hero being a wimp is not heroic.

Marinette is constantly on the verge of giving up and has to be motivated to keep going on by other characters. In ‘Origins’ alone, she got three pep talks and Alya was in danger before she decided to don the Ladybug earrings again. In ‘Volpina’ she was about to give her Miraculous to Volpina before Cat Noir intervened. This is even true in her civilian life with the way she almost skipped a fashion show featuring her own design or her whole “I should just be Ladybug all the time!” moment. The main hero constantly being on the verge of giving up on any goal she’s pursuing is not heroic.

It’s one thing to grow through others’ support to be able to carry your own weight, but Marinette never overcomes one of her fits without outside help. If she was as good of a planner as the show claims, she would have fled when she discovered Gabriel was Monarch and gotten backup, because she should know by now that she’s weak-willed and incapable of withstanding stress on her own. She should have showed up at the mansion of the man the writers confirmed she knew was Monarch with any allies she could gather to begin with. Instead she thinks she can solo Monarch when she’s never been able to get out of a high-stakes situation without backup before. Arrogance and lack of strategic thinking are not heroic.

To make matters worse, when Marinette is having her final battle against her nemesis with none of her allies, like the writers claim they intended from the start, she objectively loses. The wish canonically destroys the world to remake it anew. That means Monarch destroyed the world. It doesn’t matter if he put it back the way it was (mostly) or if Marinette benefits from these changes. Letting the villain destroy the world is not heroic. She’s such a bad hero that she can't even save the day when it really counts. The only other time I’ve seen the heroes lose this badly was in Watchmen, which was an intentional deconstruction of superheroes where said heroes were meant to be seen as unheroic.

Also, like, Marinette’s other accomplishments are also very lackluster. I’m usually the first one to defend Miraculous’ fashion choices, but, really, what has Marinette designed after the retool? The fucking cloaks artists use to protect their clothes from paint splatters that she designed with the prompt “thematically opposing superhero costumes”? Before the retool she designed several accessories that are worn by famous people in addition to a lot of other stuff. Even more glaringly her four and a half seasons long love quest where she struggled with confessing to the guy she’s in love with was resolved by the guy confessing to her first, while she struggles to reciprocate for the rest of the season even after they get together. The main hero being such a failure is not heroic.

All of Marinette’s series goals, as a protagonist and hero, end in failure. She never could work up the courage to win Adrien over, that was handed to her. She never earned her position as Guardian, she lucked her way into finding the book and being the one nearby when Fu had to transfer his position thanks to the position she put him in. She lost all of the Miraculouses within months or possibly weeks of becoming the Guardian. She let the world be destroyed. Marinette, as a whole, just isn’t a heroic character.

You can’t even argue that Marinette is inexperienced and still learning and that’s why she still loses, because the show explicitly tells you that this is not the case. Ladybug, after gaining all of her full adult powers in ‘Queen Mayor’, still loses. French historical hero Jeanne d'Arc calls Marinette the greatest Ladybug ever and she still loses. This is the best she, or any Ladybug, can do, this is what peak performance from a Ladybug hero looks like: losing the fight and the bad guy destroying the world. The show treats Marinette as a super competent girlboss while she accomplishes nothing of true importance to her or the story. I’m not interested in any Ladybug hero if this is what the best of them can accomplish: nothing. Ladybug isn’t a superhero, she’s a loser hero.

[alpaca-clouds]

Childhood in a Solarpunk Future

Two weeks ago I went to a book presentation of a book that basically tackles how freaking child-unfriendly our modern society is. And yeah, that is a good point. The modern world hates children - while obviously complaining constantly that there are not enough of them. So basically they want kids to exist (obviously preferably white, middle-to-upperclass kids, not those poor kids or non-white kids). But they also want them to exist somewhere where they cannot be seen and heard and do not bother adults. Outside of it being financially nearly impossible for many of us to raise children (I for one really want one or two kids - but I cannot afford it), the world out there really is not made for kids. The expection is basically that we put kids for the whole day into the "kid-holding-system" that is mainly designed to keep kids out of the world. KIndergarten at first, then school, that also has the second goal of somehow creating little worker drones for the economy to grow. No wonder that kids these days do dream of becoming Youtubers, Twitch Streamers or Tiktokers.

But the thing about Solarpunk of course is, that it is meant to be an utopia, where things would not have to be that dire. So, how would a childhood in a Solarpunk world look like? Or rather: How could we improve childhoods. Because let's face it, we have the ability to do so today. We just have a bunch of politicians who do not want that.

Now, one thing first: I am always going to assume that a Solarpunk future is being run under the communist principle of "from each, according to their ability; to each according to their needs". Meaning, that you do not need to worry about getting your family fed, warm, or houses. That will just be provided. So first of all the issue so many of us face right now of not really being able to afford children would just not exist anymore. Society would take care of itself in this regard.

And of course I am also going to assume that a Solarpunk future will break out of the nuclear family in a bunch of different ways. Be it with more polyamorous families being around, be it with people living in thier chosen families, or be it in more traditional, but still very valid multi-generational households. Which for children will mean one thing: There will be more people they can rely on than just two parents.

There definitely also needs a better supported version of youth social workers. Right now, the entire youth social work thing is a pure nightmare in most countries, that in the end mainly exists to make it harder for marginalized folks to have kids, as their actions often get harshly judged by those organizations, while the very rich can and usually will abuse their kids to no end, but never once be challenged by any agency meant to protect kids, forcing those kids to either try and basically sue themselves out of the family, or just... accept abuse for their life.

Now, obviously in a Solarpunk world, we would not have "very rich people" anymore - but no matter how utopian a world will be, some kids will still be abused. Not because people are evil, but because some families will be for one reason or another overwhelmed with their kids. Be it, because the family has struggles with mental health, or be it because the kid has. And there needs to be a more solid system to protect children - and especially more systems where kids themselves can be empowered to go, while not fully ignoring that not all children might have the ability or courage to do this.

Ironically, school is one of those things I had a lot of discussions about with other folks in the Solarpunk community, because I met a lot of folks who think that school itself should just be done away with. Mainly because they associate school with authoritarianism and think folks should be able to learn what they want.

While I agree with the second part - I do not agree that this means doing away with schools. Because for one, leaving children to their family, can still mean others will make decisions what a kid can and cannot learn. (Just think of the entire homeschool debacle in the US caused by parents not wanting their kids to learn about evolution, biology and LGBTQ folks.)

I just do think that schools should be less structured around what children should learn, and more structured around what they want to learn.

Sure, there is some stuff I think every child should learn. Basic reading, writing, math, and some general knowledge about history, biology, and the environment. But I do think outside of the basics, school should generally be made in a way that kids can focus more on what they actually want to learn. Rather than having classes based on age, allow kids to just join learn groups based around topics. A kid is interested in history? Yeah, let the kid do a lot of history. A kid is interested in mechanics? Sure, let the kid do that. A kid just cares about nothing but art? Then just let the kid do art.

There is no need to force kids into this very tiny mold - let them jsut do what they want to do. Kids are naturally curious. They will want to learn. And also, do not grade them. We know for a fact that grades harm kids and don't say shit about what they can and cannot do. Let it be.

And if a kid has a bad day, let them just have their place in that school, where for a day they can just hang and relax. No need to put on so much pressure.

Mind you, there are a very few schools right now that work like this, and we can see that the children there tend to do better both academically and psychologically. This is how school should work. And folks who do those concepts have been pretty sure about that for the last 120 years.

And there is of course also the food. Due to a Solarpunk world not being capitalist, there would be less junk food and more open kitchens where everyone could just have the food they wanted - well sourced and prepared. With an ability to participate in the cooking, making kids less alienated from their food. This is another thing we know from psychology. Kids who participate more actively in cooking will eat more and more varied food. No, they will not eat all the vegetables, and that is okay. If a kid does not like brussel sprouts or some other vegetable, that is fine. Don't force them to eat that. Please. You do more harm than good.

Which also brings me to something else: Kids, yes, even younger kids, absolutely do need to spend time unsupervised by adults with their friends. Bonus points if it is outside in nature. Yes, that is dangerous. Yes, sometimes people die because of it. But kids that get to do this will be more confident in themselves. Kids need their little adventures.

But speaking of dying... I am just going to assume that in a Solarpunk world, kids would be vaccinated.

And of course, those places for children, will be all accessible. Kids should not be segregated in any way. Not between ethnicity, not between sex or gender, and definitely not between abled and disabled. It is fine. Kids can deal with this.

Something I do wonder about though - and this is something that people love to ignore in worldbuilding - is the media that children consume in those worlds. Because yeah. Kids will consume media. Obviously. Everyone will. And this is were I am standing there is a bit of an issue. Because I kinda fear that in a Solarpunk world, adults might care a bit too much to produce super valuable content for kids. But, like... I actually think that some medial junk food is quite okay. Don't overdo it and stuff, but let the kids have some stupid annoying cartoon that parents don't get. It is fine.

Partly, also, because I think folks can just create some really good stuff if you let them.

And while I am not quite sure how to think about stuff like merchandise in a Solarpunk world - because we do not want capitalism after all... I cannot help but think, that there certainly is some joy in collecting stuff like figures or cards. Not just because it can allow kids to develop other creative skills through play, but also because there is a lot of community to be found in this. But, again, I am not fully sure how this will work without capitalism driving it. I mean, I have no doubt that if you let artists run wild, someone will definitely produce some kids show based around a card game, even without the goal of making millions in card sales. Never forget, YGO exists mainly because the mangaka was a probably autistic, anarchist-leaning guy with a hyperfocus on the history of games and gaming in general, who kinda accidentally invented a card game that now has been around for a quarter century. While yes, he originally wanted to use Magic for this, chances are that he might have invented that card game just for the fun of it. It never had been about making a lasting franchise.

So, I guess it would still work, eh?

But yeah, I do think kids deserve a lot more control over their lives in general. I do think kids deserve to be outside a lot more. I do think kids want to learn, but they want to play. Some might be totally fine playing outside and running through a forest all day. But some kids might prefer to play with action figures or cards or stuff - and that should be fine as well.

Just... Leave kids more freedom to do what they want - as long as it does not do harm. And value children more as members of society. As people. Because that is a thing that society today mainly tends to forget: Kids are people too.

[lesbianashleywilliams]

So those of you who have been following me may have noticed that I all but disappeared for about three months...well, that's because I've been planning to go to Japanese language school, and the wheels have really begun to start turning!!!!!!

I have been given the opportunity of my lifetime to be able to attend a Japanese language course at the International Study Institute in Tokyo's Shinjuku Ward. The course runs for a year, with the opportunity to extend it to two years, if my grades and money are sound [insert sound of children cheering here].

Being able to study Japanese locally and long-term has been a life goal of mine since I was fourteen. Though I'll probably never be able to fulfill my teenage dream of being an interpreter/translator for expats, this feels like the next best thing. Due to suffering from several comorbid chronic conditions that have majorly altered my life, most notably the beast known as systemic lupus erythematosus, I will probably never be able to seize another chance like this ever again. I won't be going in as a total novice, as I was able to take a year's worth of 1000-level Japanese language courses in college…before I had to drop out…… Since then I've been self-studying and using language exchange apps for practice, but nothing will beat the experience of using it in the day-to-day.

At this point in time (January 2024), my first six months of tuition have already been paid for. I am currently in a quiet waiting period while I wait to get to the next steps of the Certificate of Eligibility/Student Visa process. Before that, though, I need to secure my flight and housing. For the sake of my health, safety, privacy and comfort, a sharehouse will not be an option; I will have to seek a private apartment. I am here today to request assistance with the aforementioned flight and initial housing costs. It's still too early to commit to either of those, but:

The average cost of flexible one-way flights from where I am to either of the two Tokyo metro airports (Haneda and Narita) is running around $1200

I am doing some preliminary apartment scouting and am hoping not to exceed $800 per month (I will be traveling with suitcases and will need to properly store them). The apartments I am looking at do not require a security deposit or key money, but will probably come with a guarantor fee.

Now because I'm not going over there through one of the more common avenues - through a university or a job - I have to do it myself. Real life has meant that I've had to dig into my bank balance a bit, and after paying for the first six months I'm a little under the 2 million yen (~$14k) threshold that Immigration likes to see for a year's study. I'm lucky enough in that I will at least have a regular source of (unearned) income, as well as a financial sponsor; it's just the bank balance, flight, and accommodation that are hanging me up. Right now I am setting the initial goal at $3000, but I expect to move those goalposts at least once. Any extra will go towards a flight home for the Christmas holidays in December. After that, it'll go towards paying down my credit cards as much as I can prior to leaving the United States.

I can provide my conditional letter of acceptance from ISI, as well as the school invoice and receipt of the bank transfer for the first six months of tuition upon request (identifying information redacted, of course).

Because there's still a couple of months until I'm set to fly out I put together a GoFundMe (now that's a name I haven't used in a while) to idly collect whatever help I can. At the very least I just need this post to circulate enough to eventually cast a wider net outside of Tungle.hell.

GoFundMe

If you can't use GFM, V3nmo and P4ypal are also options:

V3nmo: @/venus3palette

P4ypal: @/fantasytheater

Again: I'm not in that much of a hurry, and the situation isn't dire! Thank you for combing my wall of text!!!!