#while chris is getting fucking cooked and tanned

[thealmightytrashdump]

Apologies in advance for the cringe!

I kid you not, my friend and I love to fangirl when u drop another one of your wesker takes 🫣 then we go over them together like it’s a raven from another continent /half joke.

Do u think wesker would be a beanie or an earmuffs guy?? Assuming this man cares to protect his hair from the cold.

🥰🥰🥰 no cringe just wholesome 🥰🥰🥰

My first impressions was earmuffs BUT YOU'RE RIGHT. This man would absolutely have a beanie for long periods in the cold. I'm thinking S.T.A.R.S. era Wesker just chilling in the Midwestern cold with a S.T.A.R.S. beanie on, enjoying a hot coffee or like has wittle heating pads in his mittens for them -0° weather.

I still feel like earmuffs would be his go to, just cause you don't really see him use any head warmth stuff in game. Like in the Umbrella Chronicles. Mans was just walking around in the Siberian tundra with only a trenchcoat, sunglasses and gloves for any sort of warmth and protection from the elements.

Earmuffs would've also been a great addition to his ensemble. Keeps his iconic look still looking iconic but also conveys that he's in the fucking Siberian tundra, but i digress.

Final answer: Beanie pre S.TA.R.S. Earmuffs post S.T.AR.S.

As for if he cares about hair care or skin care, I lowkey think he doesn't and he just has great genetics (kek). Mans is a boomer, he has never on-screen cared about anything regarding his appearance other than smoothing back his hair regularly. That just seems like a habit he has because the little baby hairs tickle his forehead during any sort of activity and it annoys him.

Like those memes where one person does all this skincare and still has acne but the other just splashes water on they face and looks great. I don't think he cares too much tbh.

Love it when i get asks 🥰🥰🥰

[2kverrr]

MIKE MUNROE - Dating Headcanons

UNTIL DAWN || Mike Munroe x reader

he’s known not only by the group to be a player, but also by your entire school.

so when he started trying to talk to you a bit more, you were more than prepared to shut. it. down.

there was a sour ending between him and emily soon after hannah and beth’s disappearance, and at this rate, jessica too (she was clearly still hung up over their summer fling).

his confidence surpassed yours and he was relentless. joining you ashley and sam, uninvited and unexpected:

“hey guys, what’re we talking about” the brunette seats himself next to you, purposefully nudging your shoulder. “we were talking about y/n’s next cheer competition” sam sighs, rolling her eyes and crossing her arms as mike slowly starts to put his arm around you, “erm- what is this?” ash points, glaring at your arm, causing you to look down to see his big, tan hands creeping around your shoulder. at an instant, you shrug him off as your face flushes red. this boy was going to be the death of you.

pulling you out of classes with white lies to your teachers:

“yeah, she needs to head to the attendance office” he beams his charming smile towards the teacher then winks at you. “what the fuck do you want?” you query with hands on your hips stepping out of your english lit class. “you.”

notes in your locker. but it as sweet as the action was, it didn’t phase you, you didn’t want to be his next side-piece:

roses are red, violets are blue. flowers mean shit, i want you.

me, you, a couple of beers and my dads garage?

why are you playing so hard to get, we’ve known each other for like forever. you only make me like you more.

eventually you’d received the painfully awkward video message from josh, opening his lodge up on mount blackwood for the winter.

you’d had message after message from the boy, invites and offers to take transport together, it was a little bit sad how hard he was trying, he usually breathes in a girl’s direction and they’re ready to chew his food for him.

so you accepted, you’d known him since you were 5 after all, what’s the harm?

and then it started, all with him asking to hold your hand on the ski lift, insisting his left hand was cold. pathetic but cute.

during this you were spotted by a wild josh, lively and charismatic as ever considering the circumstances, he made sure to let everybody within a 20 mile radius know of his suspicions upon the two of you.

the attention had its positives and negatives. jess didn’t approve, nor did sam. josh, chris and ashley were happy as ever. nobody ever knew what emily was really thinking so you tried your hardest to ignore it, whereas matt was glad mike was busy with anyone but his ex.

“soo… i think it’d be wrong not to ask you out right now.”

you honestly thought, from the deepest most sincere part of your heart, believed your were mike-proof. but through all his little tactics he managed to make you actually like him, romantically.

a lot of girls gave off the wrong impression of mike; man-whore, cheater, horndog. maybe they were the problem because you couldn’t ask for anyone better.

he cooks surprisingly well, though he refuses to wash up, he has some pretty good experience in the kitchen.

he doesn’t mind too much about what you do and where you go, maybe it’s because you’re the same with him, unlike one emily davis, “a human gps with my location on lock and an accusation weapon system activated”

he always smells good. he has gone through at least 4 of his favourite colognes within the past year, which also means you’ve got an easy birthday/Christmas present option.

weirdly enough, he loves going on shopping trips with you. you think he’s pretty useful fashion-wise whereas he always enjoys convincing you into ‘rating your clothes’, aka - watching his girlfriend undress while sitting in silence.

amongst these positives, you can only name one terrible feature with mike. he’s a snorer. not just a little soft breathy snore. it’s a full on mouth open, putting his entire body weight on you, speakers blasting snores. it could also easily be mistaken for a helicopter taking off.

eventually emily warms up to your relationship, managing to see eye to eye with you. you’ll never know what her ulterior motive is but you have enough trust in mike to bat off her ways.

[50cal-fullauto-astarion]

Had a dog-ass day so I self-indulged and started on a passion project I wasn’t planning to yet, just to cheer myself up. Simon Riley x F!Ranger OC, feat. more 21 year old Simon.

2003, May .

There’s little romance to bleeding out in Baghdad, but Lance Corporal Simon Riley, twenty-one, is poor-mouthed for it.

He knows it because he can feel it; the warm, living heart is screaming like a dying, thrashing animal in his chest. Pinned down in a mountain of rubble, snipers dancing around blast-barren windows of what used to be apartment buildings, and Simon was the dumbest son of a bitch on the ground, taking a round in the fleshy part of thigh.

Might not’ve ever made it to uni, but he’s not fucking ignorant, this flesh wound tis absolutely not a scratch.

Back slumping down the concrete barricade he’d been propped against, four hours out of water, down a good liter-and-a-quarter of blood, he figures he’s done-in. He’d started out shooting over the barricade, but his gun and all his extra clips ran dry. Wasn’t a shit shot either, even bleeding out.

Starts refusing water when the Welsh comms boy offers it, starts shoving the medic’s pack away from him when he tries to go for fresh bandages, and starts staring at Chris Merryweather’s body cooking on the tarmac fifteen meters out.

It’s weird. It’s bloody fucking weird. Merryweather was making shit jokes about fucking Simon’s mum this morning. Simon was ready to cave his head in with a trench shovel. Now he’s dead. Simon wants to go home.

Figures. He’d only signed up to get out, scrape something together for her and Tommy without the old man’s fucking stain on it. Now he wants terribly to be back in the water-damaged council house with mold inside the cabinet doors, where mum somehow managed to buy a thirdhand NES and Duck Hunt for him and Tommy one Christmas, when dad was in jail.

So fuckin’ stupid, they all three sat around and ate popcorn and soup noodles for dinner on the living room floor, and it was perfect.

That’s about when the sharp pops of sniper fire are blasted out of existence by the deep-throated scream of two diesel engines hitting turbo drive to shriek an ear-splitting whistle. The two tan beasts roar into sight, lumbering much more slowly than Simon had imagined, with crushingly heavy determination over debris to close in. Hell-bent monsters dragging themselves into the fray, black smoke thick as paint pouring over their hindquarters from the exhaust stacks.

There are Punisher skulls spray-painted on the doors, dripped while wet. Makes him think about a book he lost years ago—was about the ossuaries in Portugal. Makes him think about Tommy, too, in that goddamned mask, waking Simon in the middle of the night only to loom and breathe over him.

[fandomfluffandfuck]

EXCUSE ME, you can't talk about that sub!Steve x Bucky fic in your tags for that post and not share! Holy shit, it sounds amazing and I want to read it!

related to these tags on this post

gif credit @/stevenrogered

That wasn't actually a particular fic that I read and could now recommend. It's just a thought that was in my head! I mean- maybe it's just the dom in me but, yeah... 👀 the idea of two subs just being absolutely useless while together is too fucking much.

Just, like, two subs, melting into each other; whining and panting into each other's sweaty skin, handing desperately grabbing at any part of the other's body they can. Both of them are squirming badly to try and get something done but it doesn't ever work- getting too distracted by the other's soft, pretty mouth to get too far into that half-formed plan. 🥴🥴

And with those two photoshoots of Chris and Seb in @fishcustardandclintbarton 's original post in mind...

Putting the rest of this under the cut because it got out of control and is way longer than I intended lol

I'm picturing these two subs, Steve and Bucky, as being unable to keep their hands off of each other after a night of straight-up fucking foreplay at a bar.

You know how it goes:

Dancing way too close, sweaty, with sneaking hands under skimpy clothing that only gets rucked up and pushed out of place to expose more the more they move together. Bucky's hands find Steve's fuzzy tits and abs under his flannel shirt that's been left open with stained white tank top under it, his ratty tank was at one point tucked into his belt with its chunky buckle shining in the low light but it's not anymore. Instead, there's a pretty big gap between his shirt and and his boot-cut, worn-from-work jeans- a delicious slice of skin for Bucky's eyes to devour, the v of his hips sharp and well-defined.

Then, God, soon enough Steve's huge hands find their way to Bucky's slick, summer tanned, dust-dirty skin too. Slipping under his thin, practically see-through shirt and down his tight pants, the bottoms of which have been stuffed into cowboy boots. The mark of a city boy that ran away from his home the second he turned 18 and is now trying to fit in here. Nothing but a pretty young face and a brand-new farmers tan; just a hand for hire, just trying to be rugged. Bucky’s gotten close to looking like a local but he's not quite there.

Steve's from 'round here originally and he fits right in (almost, he fits in here except for his like for getting a dick in his mouth so much that he'd do it for free but gets paid for it whenever possible, taking in all those sad John's that're too deep in the closet to find their way out). Well, not 'round, 'round here exactly...

Here is the only gay bar for miles and miles.

Steve is just from this state. Not the bar itself. And the bar...

It's a grimy little dive bar. Packed with all the fellas and gals and folks in between or beyond that everyone else will pretend they don't recognize once the sun comes up. For now though... the lights beat down on them like heat-lamps, cooking them and giving the heavy, humid air a raunchy, red color. It tints their vision and their emotions, turning everything into want. Seek and destroy.

It's so hot in the packed bar that there might as well be steam rising off them both with the way they're sweating. Sweating from all their dancing- grinding on the dance floor. Closer than they should be in public. Especially the public of these parts...

Steve buys the first round for them, watching with heavy, dark eyes as Bucky downs it like it's water. Like it's nothing. His throat bobbing, head leaned way back.

When he finishes, throwing the glass back down against the counter... he licks his lips, smirking. There's a wild look in his eyes too. Those pretty eyes that he can't quite tell the color of under the heat-lamp lights.

Steve's throat is dry enough suddenly that he's glad to have not taken his shot yet. He does, downing it with a wince.

Bucky instantly orders two more for them each. Cheers-ing him and taking it right to the face.

Steve is somehow already dizzy. The alcohol going right to his veins, no chaser.

And now re-hydrated, they go back out to the dance floor. Grinding closer, sweating more, swearing under their breath as the tension grows and grows. Shouting at each other over the other people and pounding music. They're hoping to hear the other's flirting fully but neither of them ever gets all of it until-

"DO YOU SMOKE!?"

"CHOKE!? I'M NOT CHOKING?"

"SMOKE! DO YOU SMOKE?" Bucky shouts again, his hand disappearing off of Steve's ass to find and rattle a carton he's gotten from... somewhere. Not from anywhere in his pants. Steve's felt him completely up, there was nowhere those pants weren't skin tight to his body.

Not that it matters where the fuck he got those smokes because, hell yeah, Steve wants a smoke. He wants that nicotine buzz and he wants to see Bucky's mouth wrapped 'round one of 'em. Bad.

He wants it bad.

"YEAH!" Steve shouts, nodding exaggeratedly so Bucky can see even if he can't hear.

Together, they go outside.

Bucky grabs his hand to lead them and Steve squeezes his back so they don't get separated in the pulsing crowd. They leave out the back exit next to the bathrooms that, if all else failed, Steve had thought about dragging Bucky into to f-

Do what about every other person that comes out of the bathrooms looks like they were doing. Clothes askew. Hair messy. Blush or bite marks decorating their skin.

Bucky shakes one out of the carton and lights it up, not offering Steve a second but instead taking a drag off his now lit one, then handing it off to Steve. Steve inhales shakily, not because he's never smoked - he's currently "quit" - but because there's a difference here. When Bucky's taste is so fresh on the smoke it's different.

The taste goes into his lungs, hazy and slow. He exhales. Inhales again. Blinking soft and slow. His head usually spins less as a result of these things but... now that he's smoking this unbelievably attractive and not-completely-strange stranger's cigarette? His head is spinning more.

They share the whole cigarette.

Breathing in each other's smoke and taking it deep into their chests, yet their breathing still remains uneven. Sweat drying on their skin. The burn of shots sizzling in the back of their throats.

Steve gets the last drag as he leans against the brick wall in the dim-lit, dirty alley at the veeeery end of town. Lungs and skin buzzing, he moans as he lets go of the last drag in a cloud because Bucky has his mouth on his neck, his fist curled so tight in his tank top that one of his nipples is exposed, peaked and hard like its cold out despite the sweltering summer night.

Bucky snatches the smoldering cigarette from between Steve's fingers, only the filter left, and flicks it away, stomping on it with his boot to put it out. One elegant move. Almost like he's practiced it, like putting out a cigarette is the new art of seduction.

Steve swallows.

There's a moment of silence.

Crickets complain of the humidity somewhere out in the darkness that envelops the rest of their surroundings beyond the back porch light of the underground, shady gay bar.

Quickly though, the silence explodes into kissing that tastes like smoke and alcohol and sweat. Steve moans into Bucky's mouth. The other man groans back, attacking him that much harder. But they just keeps kissing, Bucky's mouth stays a little slack, like he's expecting Steve to fuck his tongue in between his lips. Steve is expecting Bucky to take control though. He's- he's never on the other side of it. He's always the one taking and he likes it that way. He doesn't know how to give. And it seems like Bucky doesn't know how to give either. Why would he? Looking like that, why would he ever have to lift a finger... both of them might be something of pillow princesses. Maybe...

Their kissing is wet and messy. They keep moaning. Groaning. Gasping.

They keep coming to a stop with their messy kissing because they're both breathing too hard, fighting the thick night air and the arousal boiling up inside them. Steve pants hard against Bucky's lips. His mouth is tingling. His body is buzzing. He's hungry. He bites Bucky's bottom lip. Bucky moans in shock and recovers enough to bite him back, hands squeezing tighter around his forearms. And just like that, they both remember they have hands-

Fuck, yes.

Their hands roam viciously. Bucky slides his hands up his forearms to his shoulders, and around the back of his neck. Steve does the same with his own hands. They're chest to chest. Hearts both pounding.

Steve doesn't know who started the kissing or who got handsy again first, all he knows is that both are back and both are good. So much better than just dancing. So much better than breathing in each other's smoke.

Suddenly Steve’s leaned up against the wall tighter, harder than when he'd been smoking and leaning against it. Tighter not because Bucky is pushing him into the wall as he kisses him senseless but because Bucky is melting into him. His knees going weak just like Steve's own are. Pushing into each other.

Steve squeezes the back then the front of Bucky's neck as he melts forward. Bucky moans when the pressure comes to the front of his neck. His lips slip from where they were slotted against Steve's own down to his jaw, hungrily mouthing at him there. Oh. Exposing his neck more for more of that, Steve loses all ability to give a fuck about anything but this.

Right up until-

"Ay!" a voice breaks into the hot night air like the sound of two hands clapping together without warning.

They're shaken out of their lust, freezing in place.

The person, obscured by shadows mutters something to them about how they don't need another reason for the boys in blue to come sniffing 'round. No extra attention so no free shows outside the bar. There's a hotel down the way though. If you gotta.

One of them nods stiffly at the person as they keep on doing their thing- taking out the trash maybe?

They're startled but grateful to have been warned as opposed to beat or arrested or whatever hellish other thing might happen in this particular area. However, they're too into one another to really lose the heat, the hardness pressed up against the other's body, and so without a word between them... they understand they're going to the hotel. Steve knows the one the shadowed person is talking about. And the name "hotel" is generous. More a run-down motel than anything else. At least Steve knows they actually wash their sheets. And there's a couple a' rooms that have jacuzzi tubs... a few with mirrored ceilings too, just like you see in big cities with the glitz, the glam, the pretty fucking people just like the pretty boy Steve has in front of him.

Oh, Lord.

It's a struggle to get to the motel without giving away what is going on too much. But they do it. Stumbling under few and far between working, buzzing streetlights.

When they finally get checked in and pile on in, their bodies hit the shitty, squeaky mattress with enough force to bounce. Bucky is on bottom first but he squirms enough trying to get out of his shoes that they end up more side-by-side on the bed. Devesting themselves of their clothing in a mad dash. Bucky has one boot off. Steve has both off. Thats as far as they get before they both give up on their clothes. What the hell does it matter? They're already sweaty enough that the outfits will need to be washed twice and they both have a near literal puddle of pre-cum wetting their underwear so a little messy grinding doesn't matter. It doesn't feel bad. No. It doesn't feel bad, not even though the fabric is rough and heavy. No. It feels so good.

Squirming against each other on the bed without one of them moving to roll over on top and take control of the situation, they just stay locked together on their sides, pawing at each other. Grinding against each other with more desperation than technique. Panting into each other's mouths rather than talking and negotiating who's gonna do what here.

Words are a waste of breath.

Breath that feels so much better fanning out over skin, heavy and panting on sweaty skin. Breath that keeps being punched out of lungs in moans and gasps and whines.

They're both wearing too many clothes, fabric getting caught and tangling them up so, so close. Their necklaces too, keep getting caught up. It makes Bucky laugh recklessly, their hands fighting between their heaving chests. Steve's necklace is a cross on a chain leftover from when he actively tried to be the same as everyone else in the town he comes from, including prayin' and goin' to church, and Bucky's fashionable, pretty necklace from his days as a dangerous and salacious city boy- a thin string of leather that hangs down below his pretty collarbones under his stretched out shirt. He might've shoplifted it from some big-name, chain store that could survive without in as he made his way out here. To the middle of fucking nowhere.

It doesn't matter. Their necklaces don't matter. Their clothes don't matter. All that matters is that they're just as tangled as those fucking necklaces, in the way of each others pleasure like their clothes are in the way because together they're useless. Moving recklessly against each other. Grabbing and kissing. Spit mixing. Lust growing hotter and hotter until with a whine that's truly pathetic and shoves a spear of heat through Bucky’s gut, Steve gets his hands un-fisted from Bucky's already stretched shirt to shove the heel of one against Bucky's pants.

The bulge of his election under hand is so fucking satisfying. In the most animal way.

"Fuck!" Bucky moans, now even more desperate. He grinds hard into Steve's hand. Shaking. Trembling. He can feel the friction in his teeth. God.

So good.

Steve's hand is hot and heavy against him. His hips grind harder. Dirtier.

Although, before Bucky can get his shit together enough to throw Steve's dirty game back at him, getting a hand on the fucking huge bulge of his cock in his on-the-way-to-being-ruined jeans, Steve squirms down.

Bucky groans in complaint as Steve squirms and takes his hand off his aching dick.

Steve shoves his face against Bucky's bulge instead of his hand the second he's low enough on the creaky, uncomfortable hotel bed.

Bucky moans.

Steve shoves his face against Bucky's bulge and fucking nuzzles him like a kitten. Mouthing at his cock through the denim. Hot and humid. His tongue lavs over the shape of him through his clothes.

Shit.

It's so much. It's not enough.

Bucky wants to growl and grip his hair and demand for him to use his mouth to take his pants off with his teeth then really blow him like he thinks he should, based on how sex usually goes when he's the one in Steve's position, but he can't make himself do anything but grab weakly at Steve's shoulders and make useless little sounds in the back of his throat. Choked. Whimpered. Pathetic. He's just drowning in it. Drowning in the naughty pleasure. This shouldn't be so hot. This shouldn't be so hot! They're just grinding and acting all helpless like they're fucking teenagers again. Unskilled and just going with what feels the best.

It. Feels. So. Good.

Steve's face smashed up against his throbbing erection. Moaning and franctic with it. Continuing to mouth at him as his hands fail terribly at peeling Bucky out of his too-tight jeans. Unable to get a grip on them and tug them down. Unable to get what he wants and now whimpering, fuck, no, he's crying about it now.

It's so filthy and desperate. Steve is just trying to blow him but he's too fucking horny and fuck-dumb to figure it out as he grinds himself against Bucky's shin. It's so filthy. It's so desperate. It's so good that Bucky is cumming before he wants to admit it, biting on his full lower lip until he tastes copper.

It's okay, Steve can lick it off and out of his mouth later. Dirty and slutty.

Through the rest of the night and into the morning, they get into lots more of trouble. Steve gets hard again first and can't help himself from grinding into the bed. It's encouraged by Bucky, who grabs the pillow at the top of the bed, slipping it between Steve's legs... Steve, with heavy eyelids and an a lazy-open mouth, goes to town whimpering until Bucky can't help but grind up into the heel of his own hand watching.

They make out in the tub, side-by-side, trying to lean into each other, trying to sit in the others lap but not getting anywhere.

They sit in the jacuzzi tub with the jets going and touch each other's slick, wet bodies. Admiring the way water runs over muscles and skin and the other's pretty face. Taking full advantage of their nakedness.

They take turns fingering each other. Encouraging the other saying, yeah, yeah, yeah, feels good, could you just- because they're never been on the other side of fingering someone else. Usually they're the ones getting fingered and running off of the blueprint of what feels good when they're on the bottom.

They rut against each other's slick thighs, once they get naked for slipping into the tub and they don't get dressed again until they leave the motel room, painting each other in cum.

Bucky begs Steve to come and get 'im whenever he needs it, find him at one of his odd jobs and get filthy while on the clock. Take a literal roll in the hay when he's done baling hay but then is stacking 'em in the barn. Maybe find him when he's chopping down those trees that aren't growing good in the woods behind the Johnson's farm. Sweaty and naked from the waist up, muscles flexing with every chop. In need of a fucking break, held up against a tree and sucked off until his eyes roll back in his head. Steve wagers that he'll only do it if Bucky comes and finds him too, when he's hanging out in back alleys, by the convent store bathrooms and showers, or by the pool at the one nice hotel they've got... waiting for a lonely John to pick him up. He won't even charge Bucky. Not for the good time they could have, talkin' about what all those filthy men have been paying Steve to do. And, hey, there's an idea. Maybe Bucky could make a lil extra cash there too. Maybe they both could. Sell themselves as a pair. Two of a kind. Two pretty, submissive boys for use... if you're lonely, we can fix that for sure.

Just overall, they are completely unable to focus on anything else but the draw of the other pretty, subby boy. It's intoxicating. And the experience of subpiling like that has kinda ruined the possiblity of hooking up with a top/dom. Unless... yeah, maybe they get a dom between the two of them some time. Someone that can order them both around and make the hard decisions that their brains get too mushy to process like who's dick goes in who's hole 👀

[k-evans-reads]

Happy Birthday

A Higher Love One Shot

Summary: Chris gets a special surprise before his birthday party

Pairing: Chris Evans x OFC Nickie Morrison

By: @k-evans-writes​ and @ourfinest-hour​

We do NOT give permission for our works to be reuploaded, translated, or reposted on any other site. Our work is our own.

Word Count: 2.5k

Warning: 18+

Previous l  Writing Masterlist l  Higher Love Masterlist | Extensions Masterlist

June 13th, 2021

3 months married, 17 weeks pregnant

Nickie looked at her reflection in the bathroom mirror, reaching up to adjust a few of her curled pieces of hair, getting them in the right spot before spraying them in place. Next she grabbed her pale pink lipstick, covering her lips in it before setting it back on the counter and deciding she looked alright. 

Today was a special day with it being Chris’ birthday. But not just any birthday, it was his 40th and Nickie was determined to make it special. The past few months, between Chris being gone for The Gray Man and then coming home to Nickie throwing up and exhausted constantly, they hadn’t been doing much of anything, besides a quick kiss and some cuddles at night before she pushed him away from her, claiming he was like a space heater. Chris had been more than understanding but she still felt bad that he didn’t get to come home from filming to her home cooking, her normal bright energy, or hardly any action in the bedroom. She had been so miserable but felt like now she was turning a corner in her pregnancy, no longer needing a bathroom nearby every time she ate or drank something that wasn’t tea, and she felt like there was a spring in her step these days, something their friends took notice of too. 

So here she was, going all out to make his birthday special and show him just how much she adored and appreciated him. They’d started the day at brunch with his mother in Sudbury, before stopping by his father and step-mother’s to say hi and catch up quickly on their way back to Concord. Nickie had planned a birthday party for him tonight, inviting their siblings and closest friends to come by to celebrate Chris. 

She could hear the echo of Scott and Josh’s voices from down the hall, the pair heading out to the patio to get the grill going and prepare the food Nickie had laid out. The sound of familiar footsteps came echoing down the hallway and she heard the bedroom close behind him while Chris called out, “Hey babe, Josh is getting the grill going since everyone will be here soon. I already sweat through this shirt though so I need to change.” His voice carried through the bathroom as she saw his shadow duck into the closet, hangers rattling as he looked for a shirt.

She leaned forward, rubbing off some stray lipstick as her eyes roamed her reflection, checking for anything else. “Your white henley is in here if you want to wear that,” She called as she saw him lean against the wooden door frame, his brows furrowing.

“What the fuck are you wearing?” 

“Just a dress I thought might be a good little birthday surprise for you,” she smirked, shrugging as her eyes met his in the mirror, biting her lip as his brows raised.  

He groaned, his eyes traveling over her practically-bare back, save for some thin straps, and moved to her reflection. He moved them over what little he could see of her front before he met her eyes again, wiggling his eyebrows as a smirk spread across his lips, muttering, “That’s a good fuckin’ surprise.”

Chris’ eyes roamed over her body in the light pink dress that showed off a lot of her tanned skin. When she turned around, leaning against the counter, he finally got the full picture of her in the tiny dress. His blue eyes took in every bit of her from the way her long legs were showcased by the short length and that little peak of her breasts from the deep v-neck as well as the side of the dress that showed off some of her soft skin that he desperately wanted to nip at. 

It had been a long time since he’d been able to have her fully, their intimate moments few and far between or cut short by a wave of sickness that came over Nickie. And while she’d finally gotten through the worst of the morning sickness, they’d been spending so much time running around and helping with their nieces and nephews, getting the nursery ready, and doing things around the house now that they’d be in Massachusetts for the foreseeable future, that Nickie- and to be quite honest, Chris as well- felt just so exhausted at the end of every day that there wasn’t much left in them for some quality time together. 

But Nickie was going to change that. It was Chris’ birthday, his first birthday that they’d gotten to share as a married couple and she was going to treat him, she just had underestimated how much Chris would like what she had planned. 

“Fuck, Nic you look so fucking good,” he whispered as he pushed himself off the doorframe, shutting the door behind him with a click before he walked over to her, caging her between the bathroom counter and his body. 

She reached up, rubbing her thumb along the side of his neck as she shrugged lightly. “Well it is your birthday after all,” she said casually, a smirk on her lips as she took in his appearance. “Although with the way you’re looking right now, I’m starting to think it feels like my birthday.” 

“Scott and Josh are outside… nobody else is here yet….” he murmured, his lips inching closer to hers with every passing second. He was feeling more and more thankful that he’d shut both of those doors, his hands landing on her hips and squeezing tightly before one hand traveled to her ass. 

Nickie reciprocated his feelings when she wrapped her arms around his broad shoulders, pulling his body flush against hers as their lips crashed together. Every movement was fast and needy, hands moving deliberately as Nickie unzipped Chris’ jeans and his big hands came under her dress to slip her panties down her long tanned legs. 

“Spin around, baby,” he murmured as he pulled away from her lips slightly, his forehead leaning against hers as they caught their breaths. His hands traveled under the skirt and back over her ass thoughtlessly, with no clear direction or path. 

Doing as he said, Nickie turned around to face the mirror which allowed her to watch him bend her over the large marble counter as much as she could, now having to accommodate a slight bump. She could see the intense need on his face, it was the same need she had which made her already throbbing for him. Chris wiggled out of his boxers and gave his hard length a few strokes, even though he didn’t really need it because coming in to see his wife dressed the way she was just for him had him hard as a rock. 

He watched as she bent over, her wide brown eyes meeting his in the mirror, a desperation in them that hadn’t been there in months. He could’ve came just from that fucking look on her face, the faux-innocence mixed with pure need as he moaned,  “God, I need you so fuckin’ bad.” 

“Please Chris, I need you inside me,” she cried, hands gripping the marble countertop as her legs already began to quiver as she pushed them apart so he could step between them, watching as he pulled his shirt off and threw it aimlessly into the corner near a laundry basket. 

With her bent over the counter, he could already see the bottom of her round ass from where her dress had ridden up but he pushed it up the rest of the way, bunching it around her waist and leaving her bare and ready for him. He lined himself up at her entrance before thrusting in hard and deep, making Nickie cry out so loudly that it made Chris thankful both those doors were closed and everyone was outside. 

He grabbed onto her hips, holding her so tight as he started thrusting in and out rhythmically, making Nickie straight up whimper. He kept his tight hold onto her hips, letting him have better control over how hard he pushed into her, wanting to be careful of her stomach and not wanting to do her too hard after so long of time apart. But it certainly was still enough to satisfy them both, their moans mixing together while they each felt the delicious drag of his thick cock against her tight walls. 

“I missed you so fucking much,” he groaned, pushing in tightly as he stared at her in the mirror, willing himself to keep his eyes open so he could watch her. 

“Me too,” she whimpered, hands twitching into fists as he thrust particularly deep inside of her, hitting that spot. “God, you feel so amazing.” 

“I need to see you, baby,” Chris coaxed her, one hand coming up to push the straps off of her slender shoulders, the material falling down and allowing him to see the bounce of her breasts with each thrust. 

Chris could feel himself twitch inside of her, watching the way she gripped the counter while her eyes squeezed shut in intense pleasure, loving every second of him filling her. They both were such physically affectionate people and having the lack of these kinds of moments together had been harder on them both than either had realized and getting to have it back felt like pure bliss. He squeezed her hip tightly, a hand sneaking down to rub tight circles on her clit as he groaned, “Forgot just how well you take me, baby.” 

“Oh fuck!” She cried out when he touched her, her walls tightening around him and squeezing him like a vice. “Chris!” 

“I know baby, I’m so close.” He grunted, knowing that after all this time of built up tension, it wouldn’t take him long to reach his peak but he was so thankful Nickie was there too. He let one hand come up to squeeze at her breast, loving the feeling of her soft flesh in his palm and squeezed at her nipple while his other continued to rub deliberate circles around her sensitive clit, making her knees to shake as she pulsed around him, unable to hang on and came with a loud cry of his name. 

It only took a few more thrusts for Chris’ jaw to fall open while he emptied inside of her, adoring the feeling of getting to be inside his wife again filling her up just the way she loved. He laid his head down, his forehead resting on her bare shoulder while they both panted, overcome with bliss from the intense moment. His hand slowly moved over her side, coming to reach on her bump as he squeezed it lightly, kissing her shoulder as they finally caught their breath. 

They both felt dizzy in the most perfect way while Chris peppered a few kisses along her back before Nickie turned her head so he could plant one on her lips. He gave one last tight squeeze to her stomach and then her hips before he pulled out of her, grabbing a washcloth to clean them both up before he went to grab himself a fresh pair of boxers and some clean clothes and Nickie worked on getting her dress back into place. 

“Honey, it looks like some of the guys just pulled up,” he called, hearing a car door shut, poking his head out of the closet and seeing some cars in the driveway. 

Nickie laughed, leaning towards the mirror again as she stared at her now-ruined makeup, calling back, “Okay, I’m just going to attempt to make it look like I didn’t just get bent over and fucked and then I’ll be out.” 

He laughed loudly, leaning on the door frame again as he jutted his chin out, looking at his wife as she fixed her makeup. “Hey, in case I didn’t communicate it well enough, you really do look fuckin’ incredible in that dress,” he said softly, a grin on his face as he just watched her, the way her rings caught the bright sunlight from the sky lights, the way her bump looked as she moved, still in awe of the fact that their son was in there, just waiting until November to finally meet them.   

A smirk spread across Nickie’s lips as she turned to meet his eyes, the smirk turning into her signature wide grin as she laughed, “You did a very good job of telling me that.” 

“Good,” he nodded, a twinkle in his eyes before they dropped unconsciously to her larger-than-normal chest. “Baby, your boobs look killer in it too.” 

“That’s why I bought it! I figured pregnancy will be the only time I’ll actually have a little more boob so I might as well take advantage of it,” she giggled, blowing him a kiss before she turned back around and continued fixing her makeup, Chris turning and walking out the bedroom door as he shook his head to himself.

He shut the door behind him to give Nickie some time to redo her hair and fix her makeup, moving down the hallway. But instead of walking outside and meeting up with everyone, he paused, lingering in the open doorway of the small bedroom they’d begun decorating. 

As he stood there, looking at all the things still in boxes, framed pictures leaning against the wall waiting to be hung, and the new bag of baby clothes Nickie had bought yesterday, it hit him that in just a few short months, a tiny baby would be in here. Their baby. Their son. 

He glanced at the accent wall he and Scott had begun to build with wood, the paint samples of some greens on parts of it so Nickie could decide on a color soon. The rocking chair in the corner by the windows was one of the first things they’d gotten and set up, unable to stop themselves from being excited by it, knowing they’d use it so often to soothe the baby and hold him. They’d also ordered some stuff for their New York and Beverly Hills homes, knowing they’d inevitably spend a night or two in New York next year with him, and that they’d have to head out to Los Angeles for Nickie’s scheduled shoots in the spring. But for now, this was home base. This was where they’d bring him home in just a few months, and get to raise him for the rest of their lives. 

This was such a different birthday than last year’s- spent meeting up with Josh for golf and then hanging out at his mom’s, practically depressed over the break up with Nickie. But here he was, a ring on his finger, his wife in the bathroom getting ready, staring at the in-progress nursery for their son. 

As he stood there with all these thoughts churning through his head, he felt a familiar gentle hand rub against his back before Nickie leaned against his side. He wrapped an arm around her, leaning to press a kiss on top of her hair and he knew standing there that he had everything he’d always dreamed of. “C’mon birthday boy, let’s go,” she murmured as she squeezed his side lightly, reaching for his hand and pulling him out of the room. 

[disasterfandoms]

Dating Jim Street HC

@madhare0512​ requested this in the discord chat

A/N: How did it take me this long to do Street? He’s literally the comfort character for most of the fandom (god, we’re all fucked). 

TW: slight Molly bashing, Karen mention, mention of foster care

- First date wouldn’t be something boring. He rides motorcycles and was a daredevil first season, you can’t convince me he would do well with a dinner date first date out. An amusement park, maybe the Santa Monic pier, and a walk on the beach seems more up his alley

- After his last relationship, he’s especially hesitant to let you in about his past. He has trouble letting people in regardless, But he let Molly in and all it did was  backfire on him. It takes patience and time for him to finally trust you, but when he does the floodgates swing open

- He would say “I love you” first. He feels things deeply, and he’s in danger everyday, so he realizes quickly to be upfront about his feelings.

-Street goes to his dad Hondo for advice when it comes to his feelings about you, or if you two had a fight although he should probably go to Deacon 

- Fighting his mother when she tries to get her manipulative little grips on him

- Meeting the team and becoming fast friends with Chris and Tan, aka hia dumbass best friends

- a lot of takeout, especially if you don’t know how to cook. He can barely cook scrambled eggs, let alone an actual full dinner without burning the food or himself.

- cuddling him on the couch playing with his hair as you watch whatever’s on tv, he just enjoys holding you and he enjoys the physical comfort it brings him to have his hair played with.

- you two would fight occasionally because he would close himself off after a hard day at work, making you feel like he’s not emotionally available to you when in reality it’s just a coping mechanism he learned in foster care

- he’s all for lazy days in. he would much rather have you for himself in his bed, snuggled up and other things rather than going for a hike or to the beach, especially on the first day off you two have together in weeks

- Jim would send little texts throughout the day to remind you that he’s okay, but also that he loves you

- going on rides on his motorcycle with him, especially when the sun is setting and you can see it clearly because the weather is so nice

- consistently having to nurse his wounds when he gets into fights with suspects, because he seems to always be the the one in fist fights. He assures you that he won, though.

- Bowling nights with Jim and Buck, especially after the events of 3x18. It’s Jim’s way of checking in on Buck without Buck feeling like he’s being babysat, while also two of the most important people in his life are spending time together.

[ashintheairlikesnow]

Tell Me Everything

Follows Found Out, Akio, Chris Sees, and I’m Here

CW: References to murder, suicide, grief, pet whump, abduction, whump of a minor, ableism, Oliver Branch manages to be creepy even now in brief reference

He’s shorter than Ben thought he would be.

Ben sees him first, but, like of course he does - Akio Nakamura isn’t exactly famous but he has his own youtube channel and is like an Olympic-level athlete, so he’s pretty fucking recognizable... if you’ve spent two days scrolling through every Instagram photo of him on three different accounts that you can find. 

Ben showed up thirty minutes early, because Ben has never been late to a fucking thing in his life and something tells him this is maybe one of the most important things he’ll ever do, even though he doesn’t quite know why. 

Something about it keeps picking at his mind, taking it apart, unraveling him with the reality that someone fucking cared about Chris, before whatever happened. Chris doesn’t remember much, and Ben and Laken had done the googling and searching and shit, trying to get some idea of what the hell could have happened to make someone like Chris - bouncy and full of sunshine optimism even on his bad days - end up at a place like WRU.

They’d found nothing a first. But Ben hadn’t known what he was looking for, then. Now that he knows what to look for, he can’t stop finding things. He feels like a detective or someone who has lost his mind, desperately piecing together a life that was interrupted, like someone disappearing mid-sentence, and Ben is following a trail of the words he said before. 

He finds human-interest stories from ten years ago, digitized articles from old community newspapers. He finds more photos from the gym, photos where the redheaded boy is in the background, or in the front always looking slightly off to one side, rarely smiling for the camera but happy to smile as long as he didn’t have to look right at it.

He finds out Veronica Higgs, murdered in the double-homicide that had destroyed the life of Tristan Higgs, had a facebook page, and it’s marked as In Memorial. So is her husband’s, but Paul Higgs’s page is private and his profile photo is a meme that hasn’t been a thing since…

Since they died.

Something about that makes his throat close up as he scrolls Ronnie’s last few public updates, the scattering of people who have left comments saying they miss her, they’re thinking of her, they hope she’s in a better place. Comments are left on the last post like clockwork, once a year, by the same few people. 

Thinking of you today, Ronnie. 

Saw your favorite bird today!

Hope you and Tris and Paul are happy wherever you are now, Ronnie. I take comfort in knowing you’re still together.

Happy Heavenly Birthday, Ronnie!

Left flowers for you today, Ronnie. Jennifer did a routine this year that uses some of Tristan’s music, we’re always thinking of you!

Thinking of you

Miss you

Hope you three are happy together

Miss you, big sister, always.

One day I’ll stop leaving comments like you’re still here. I was watching the old videos and gosh, I couldn’t help but think how proud we were of our boys back then! Rest in peace. Give Tris a kiss for me. That’s Aimi Nakamura, that’s Akio’s mom. Her profile photo is her with her arms around Akio himself, wearing his leotard and holding up a medal with a bright smile, and a younger teenager who must be his little sister - she’s just wearing regular clothes. Feeling like a stalker, Ben opens the mom’s facebook page in a new tab. He absolutely does not look at the photos of Akio she’s posted. He does not do that at all.

He might do that later.

For now he goes back to Ronnie’s page, sees that her last post was brief, something about looking for a recipe, crowd-sourcing. Tris asked to try baked oysters, isn’t that funny? Only my kid, I swear. He’d said seafood is ‘slime’ except for tuna since toddlerhood, but no, this week he wants oysters. He said he wanted to try something new for once and he might as well go as far from the usual as he could get. I

One of the joys of all of this is how when he gets something in his head, I just go with him, and we see what’s on the other side of the jump, right? Watch him spit it right back out. 

It’s fucking ordinary. 

She posted it a couple days before she was murdered.

That doesn’t seem fair, does it? He just can’t wrap his head around it. She was a good mom taking care of her kid, she got some recipe ideas... but then she never cooked any of them because she just… died?

She died, and Tristan’s - Chris’s - dad died, and then there just wasn’t anybody? There wasn’t anybody to take care of a kid who couldn’t take care of himself yet? Nobody at-fucking-all, to keep Tristan safe and loved when the people who loved him the most were gone? 

How the hell did he go from placed in the care of relatives to just... gone? How did he go from gone to a rescued runaway pet with a new name and a new life? What happened in all that gray space in-between?

Ben blinks back tears.

Whatever it was... could that happen to Jamey? Ben’s whole family has built their existence on holding his little brother together through the ways the world wants to shred everything about him. He’s spent nearly all the life he remembers with his brother’s hand closed in the fabric of his shirt, shadowing him through the world, reminding him that you can’t trust everybody, not everyone has good intentions. 

Ben doesn’t even have to think before he’s moving in front of him to block out the noise and chaos of the world that Jamey just can't filter the way Ben can. He knows that when - hopefully forever from now - their parents die, Jamey’s going to move in with Ben. 

It’s never been a question. He doesn’t want it to be a question.

But... what if Ben wasn’t there? What would happen to Jamey if his Mom and Dad were gone, and nobody was there who wanted to keep Jamey safe? He can’t stop thinking about it. He cycles around and around, and Laken called him yesterday and said not to talk to Chris for a few days, that he saw the video and he’s not okay, and Ben’s not fucking okay, either, is he?

This could happen to Jamey.

Someone could see him, alone and vulnerable, and think, no one will stop me and he can’t stop me either, and then Jamey could disappear and then just not be Jamey anymore, and there wouldn’t be anyone to save him-

Ben looks up from his phone without focusing on anything, sniffing back the pain, the tight feeling in his chest at the idea of his little brother, disappearing into some dark hallway and never coming back. Just some photos on Instagram, a video of two, some mentions on somebody’s In Memorial Facebook page, that’s all that’s left of his silly, serious, annoying, funny little brother?

Like someone turned out the light on Jamey’s life and the world just forgets him, because his family isn’t there to keep him safe and Jamey can’t always tell who you can trust and who you can’t, and… and Chris can’t either, can he?

He just wants to think the best of everyone, he forgives everyone who hurts him so easily, so quickly, like it’s second-nature, like...

Did Tristan Higgs want to think good things about whoever did this, whoever had him erased, whoever handed him off to be turned into one of those blank empty-eyed dolls celebrities and rich people drag around? Did Tristan Higgs trust the person who gave him away to be erased, because he didn’t know not to?

Who the fuck bought him?

How did it all fucking happen?

The bell chimes. Akio Nakamura is right on time.

And he’s short.

He’s got a natural almost-smile on his face at all times, a hint of tan to his skin even now in the early spring, wearing a thin gray hoodie, unzipped over a plain white t-shirt and blue jeans. His muscles aren’t visible, like this, but Ben has seen the videos and knows they’re there, the body of a trained athlete hidden under casual clothing. His hair isn’t as short as it is when he competes, in the videos Ben has already watched over and over entirely for research purposes. It’s a little longer, starting to flop over his forehead.

Dark eyes scan the interior of the store, and Ben raises one hand to catch his attention.

The smile brightens, briefly, with a quick nod - like the sun coming out from behind a cloud, Ben feels that smile as a physical warmth in his chest - and he pushes the rest of the way inside, walking straight over. 

“Hey,” Akio says, and his voice is a little deeper than it seems in the youtube videos where he narrates, and Ben, for one shining moment, completely forgets how to speak his own fucking native language.

His mouth opens and nothing comes out - except maybe kind of a croak, which, please let that not have been audible - and he clears his throat, waiting for his brain and his body to remember how to work together. “Uh… um, h-hey,” He says, finally, and shifts uncomfortably. “You’re-... right. I’m, um. I’m Ben.”

“Yeah. I, I figured, you look just like your profile photo.” Akio laughs a little, dropping into a seat cross from him, sitting casually and letting his eyes roam over the mostly-empty interior of the shop, painted with bright colors and lined with posters about ice cream. 

Ben could not possibly have picked a worse place for a professional athlete to go to… meet and talk about his dead friend, could he? Oh, God. Oh he’s a fucking moron. “Right. Uh, sorry, I couldn’t-... when you asked to meet on the phone, I kind of blanked and this was the only place I could think of-”

“Hey, that’s all right. I like coming here, when I’m off from competing. It’s been a while. Hope you don’t mind if I stick with an iced coffee today, though, I’m not feeling ice cream.” Akio grins at him, and Ben’s knees might buckle if he wasn’t sitting down already. The smile takes over his entire face, lights it up, and it reminds him so much of Chris when he’s really happy, the way Chris smiles with his entire fucking body, not just his mouth. 

“Yeah, it’s… no problem, I’ll order, I picked here, anyway. Just the iced coffee?” 

“Yeah, please. Also, I should warn you - my mom is lurking across the street faking an interest in whatever they sell at Paisley Poses and she’ll probably stop pretending she’s not here and show up before we’re done. She’s… uh. Well, get the stuff, and then I’ll, um, I’ll explain.”

“Right. Got it.” Ben’s grip on his phone is white-knuckled as he stands up, aware of every movement of his body as he walks - and he walks normally, right? Not, like weird? It’s not like Akio is watching him walk anyway, probably - over to the cash register. The cashier, whose hair is dyed a pale faded sort of seafoam green, almost the color of those weird mint shakes you can buy from McDonald’s in April, takes his order with a flat affect, unbothered, uncaring.

Ben doesn’t know what he orders for himself. His mouth moves and words come out and then he realizes he doesn’t know what he just said. 

Whatever it is, he pays for it.

He takes the little number-on-a-stick, and carries it back to the table to wait. 

“Iced coffee it is,” He says a little breathlessly. “Um, it’ll be just a sec. They’ll bring it out with my… with mine.”

Shit, what the fuck did he even order for himself?

“No problem.” Akio’s eyes move over his face, considering. He’s sitting slouched a little, but it doesn’t look quite natural - like his posture is usually so much better and he’s trying to look like everyone else. Ben’s eyes are drawn to his hands, folded over his stomach, over wrinkled white shirt fabric. He has a blood-bruise under one thumbnail.

What a weird fucking thing to notice about someone.

“I-I don’t really know where to start,” Ben admits, slouching himself. He runs his fingers over the textured case of his phone, a charcoal-black with rough edges. Jamey likes the texture on his phone, will just sit and rub the pads of his fingers on it over and over and over again, smiling in a distant way, sitting next to Ben on the couch while Ben watches TV and Jamey, who can go days without speaking and is currently one hundred percent all about how they film movies and tv shows, explains every fucking cinematic trick every camera is using at any given moment.

It’s nice.

It’s how Jamey says he loves you, by sharing what’s up in his head whenever he can, and Ben - when he’s home - always tries to listen. 

“Yeah.” Akio laughs again, and Ben decides it’s a good laugh - strong, and not overly loud, and a little infectious. “Yeah, me neither. I don’t-... how do you even begin a conversation like this? Hello, nice to meet you, what do you know about my dead best friend? I don’t know what to say, just… we don’t even know they’re the same person, do we? Maybe they just look alike. Fuck.” Akio laughs once more, but this time it’s shaky, breathier. “I genuinely can’t decide if I want him to dead or not, I just-...”

Ben takes a breath, thinking of Laken’s voice on the phone yesterday morning, exhausted and rambling after a night of not sleeping, their fear and grief and love for Chris, telling Ben to go ahead with this meeting, but Chris needed time. “They’re definitely the same person,” He says, voice low and quiet. “We, um. He saw the video you posted, and he kind of-... freaked out.”

“Freaked out?” Akio blinks, sitting up a little straighter. His eyes are focused completely on Ben’s face, which would make him blush if he weren’t trying not to look directly at him. “What do you mean?”

Ben swallows. “Um. Just. He’s-... he doesn’t remember. Or… he didn’t. Seeing the video might have… brought some stuff up. Like, a lot of... bad stuff.”

Fuck, I’ve never heard him scream like that. Laken’s voice, rough-edged, laced with their tears. I can’t believe… he needs a few days, he can’t go with you to see this guy, Ben. He’s-... he’s super fucked up right now. I’m so glad his brothers know what’s happening to him because I-I don’t know what to do and he won’t let me anywhere near him. 

Akio nods, slowly, and his hands worry at each other under the table, the smile faded and replaced with seriousness, uncertainty. “Yeah, when you said-... anyway, I looked the company up, and it’s-... it’s weird, I knew about pets, but I guess… I mean, he wasn’t old enough to…” 

“Um… yeah. So, um. I know, but they-... clearly they still did...”

They sit there in an awkward silence, and then Akio pulls his own phone out of his pocket and unlocks it. “Let me show you something. Tris and I shared our passwords for Instagram, way back, and when he-... went… when his aunt took his phone away-”

Ben’s eyebrows furrow. Something about that pricks at him. Miss you, big sister, always. 

“He went to live with his aunt?” Ben asks. The cashier reappears, setting a plain iced coffee down on the table, and Ben discovers he apparently ordered iced coffee with a scoop of ice cream for himself, and that’s not bad, good for him. It’s even his favorite ice cream, vanilla with almond and chocolate chips.

“Yeah, his Aunt Jo, his mom’s sister.” Akio shrugs one shoulder. “I never met her, she never came to meets or anything. Tris always said she was kind of a shit to him and his dad.” Something in his jaw is tightening - and the line of his jaw is catching Ben’s eyes entirely too much for the seriousness of this conversation. He can’t stop himself from looking. “She’s who he went to live with, after. She took his phone away because he was complaining to, um, to my mom and I - my mom and Ronnie, Mrs. Higgs, were… you know, team moms.” He shrugs, and Ben doesn’t know, but he nods anyway. “He was complaining about how she took him out of therapy, and… uh, you know, Tris needed therapy, just-... it helped him to, um-”

Ben swallows. “Self-regulate,” He says, softly. “Redirect potentially harmful stims. Figure out how to filter.”

“Right.” Akio smiles, a little shamefaced. “Sorry, it’s been… fucking years since I had to think about this so much. It’s… I would show my mom his messages, and my mom would call Jo and tell her to get him back in therapy and back to practice, but… you know, the social workers said there was nothing we could do about it. We weren’t family. We made complaints, but...” Akio slumps, closing his eyes briefly. "God, I don't even know if they did a home visit."

Ben closes his eyes. Jamey, trapped with someone who didn’t let him go to his own therapy. Jamey, nonverbal on hard days, trapped with someone who didn’t learn signing to talk to him during meltdowns like Ben’s family did. 

Jamey, trying to say he needed help with his hands again and again but no one’s listening, no one’s even trying anymore-

“Yeah,” Ben says, voice hoarse, and uses a thin plastic spoon with a long handle to get a bite of ice cream soaked in cold coffee taste, letting it dissolve on his tongue to buy himself some time for his throat to open back up. It’s fear in his chest, yeah, but beneath that is a bubbling, simmering fury, a distant anger for a hypothetical that he understands was Chris’s reality. “Yeah. My brother’s-... um, autistic, so I know… I know about it.”

“Yeah, I saw that.”

Ben blinks, caught off-guard. “What?”

Akio flushes, reddening along his cheekbones, and rolls his eyes at himself, slumping back down. “Okay, so, I promise I’m not a stalker, but when you messaged me I looked at your profile to see if you were just a creep. I saw the autism banner, so I looked and you wrote this really sweet thing about your brother-... how old is he?”

Ben almost forgets how to speak again. “He’s-... fifteen. Just turned fifteen. Jamey’s, um, his name is Jamey.”

“Cool. Yeah. So. I’m not a stalker. But, I’m just… listen, Tris and I started training at the gym together when we were like… seven. And I was seventeen when he, when she said… when she said he died.”

Ben’s breath catches. “Shit. She did?”

“Um. Yeah. A month after she took his phone away - we were calling her all the time asking to speak with him and stuff, my mom had kind of threatened to get social services involved again - she called my mom and said he-... um. Sorry if suicide is a thing for you, but…”

“No, I-I’m okay, I just…”

“Yeah. She told us he killed himself. We thought she was lying - oh fuck, she was lying, wasn’t she? - but so... but then you know, she had him cremated, and... I fucking-... I lost my shit, Ben. I didn’t compete, I didn’t train, I just, I just sat in my room for like six months bawling my eyes out and I told my mom it was just like she killed him, taking him away from everything when, you know, he was so sad and scared without them.”

Ben nods, quiet, watching Akio’s face as he speaks.

“My mom offered to take him, have him live with us, but… you know, she said no, and then he-... but he didn’t.” Akio drinks his coffee, absently, and Ben realizes his eyes are red around the edges. “Oh, god, he probably thought nobody cared about him anymore. Oh, shit. He probably thought we stopped giving a fuck. That h-he was al-... alone-”

He’s been crying. He’s maybe going to cry again.

Akio takes in a deep, shuddering breath. “He didn’t know-... shit. He probably just thought, no one’s coming, nobody cares, and… shit. I don’t know what to even think right now, just...” Akio slides his phone across the table. “Look at this. I locked it, when I thought-... but I kept it, anyway. I kept everything, I couldn’t-... I mean it’s just a box of stuff under my bed, but… I couldn’t throw any of it out, because… I don’t know. Somebody needed to, to r-remember him, and she wouldn’t have-... that fucking bitch told us he was dead. And she threw out all his stuff, so I’m... I guess I’m the only one who still has anything, so I just... kept it. Everything. And... this.”

There’s a moment where they both pretend Akio’s voice isn’t trembling.

“What is this?” Ben knows before the question is fully out of his mouth, but he looks anyway. Akio’s phone is still warm from his hand. 

“Tristan’s Instagram account. We, uh, we took pictures of stupid shit a lot back then, and Instagram was, like, super new and all filters all the time, so you just-... but this is his. His mom encouraged him to use it because, you know, sometimes he could show stuff better than he could say it.”

“Yeah, I get that.” Ben tilts his head, scrolling through the images. Most of the photos are just nothing - a cloud, books on a bookshelf, a tree leaf. Ben kind of quirks a smile at all the old Instagram filters right there, like looking in a fucking time capsule. Sometimes there are gymnastics photos, of the gym or of someone training. Sometimes Tristan himself appears in the photo, a blur of constant motion, photos taken by someone else. Photos of dinosaur bones at a museum, seemingly every fucking skeleton or fossil in the place.

“That’s our trip to DC, the team went,” Akio says, and points to a photo of Tristan and Akio, gangly awkward teenagers, standing in front of the Lincoln monument. Akio is smiling, and Tristan is looking up at the sky instead of the camera. “I like to look at this stuff sometimes? I know it’s been… it’s funny, we were talking a few weeks ago about how it’ll be a couple more years when he’s been dead longer than how long I knew him, but he’s not-... he was never dead.” Akio swallows, and his voice catches. When he speaks again, he sounds strained, forcing his voice to stay calm around the emotion that threatens to overtake it. “He was never dead. I keep getting caught up on that, because-... because how did we not know? How did we never… find him?”

Ben pushes the phone back to Akio. “You didn’t know to look,” He says, softly. “How were you supposed to find him if you didn’t know anyone needed to be looking?”

“I guess. My mom feels like shit, she’s been crying since we spoke to you. Well, I have, too. But my mom feels like she… she should have showed up at Joanne’s door and just taken Tristan by force, but, you know, the cops would’ve taken him right back, probably? That’s fucking kidnapping? And I keep telling her not to feel guilty, but she-”

“Yeah,” Ben says, thinking of Laken’s voice on the phone. 

I didn’t know he’d come home early. I keep saying I’m sorry but... He wasn’t-... he wasn’t ready for this and he’s so… he’s so fucked up. He won’t even talk to me. Every time Jake leaves the room we’re scared he’ll hurt himself again. He keeps telling me to find someone else, somebody easier, but I don’t want anyone else, god damn it, I want him! 

“She’s taking it really hard,” Akio says, finally, breaking into Ben’s thoughts. “I mean. We both are. But, you know, I keep thinking I can’t do this but then I think… I want to see him again. I want to see this guy in person, not just in those photos and videos you had. I want to see how he’s doing, he looks-... he looks so good.” Akio coughs, like he’s trying to cover up a sob, not quite managing it. “He looks really good.”

“He is, he’s doing… he’s good. Um, he’s having a hard time with remembering some stuff, but overall... he’s good.” Ben picks his own phone back up, pops back to Ronnie’s page. “What did you say the aunt’s name was?”

“Jo, um, Joanne… something. Sorry, I don’t really remember her last name, my mom would-”

“Botham?” Ben looks up, and god, he kind of wants to hug Akio until there aren’t tears in his eyes anymore. But also that’s a stupid thing to think, isn’t it? But he wants to, anyway. 

“Oh, that sounds right.”

“She left a comment on his mom’s-... I’ve been looking for everything I could find. I’m sorry, I know that’s creepy. But Joanne Botham left like a comment about missing-... hold on.” Ben clicks to open up Joanne Botham’s profile. A woman smiling in a profile photo, with dark hair. Something about the shape of her mouth is similar to Chris’s, but that doesn’t mean much, really. He scrolls down. 

Name, stupid quote from a stupider movie, current city is a while away from this one, like a couple states away, but she could’ve moved… There it is.

The answer to his questions, all of them, all at once, right out in the open.

“Joanne Botham,” He says out loud, “works at WRU.”

“What?” Akio looks up at him.

“His aunt. The mom’s sister, she works for WRU. That’s where Chris was-... where they hurt him. Where they make pets.”

Where they erase people. Where they take someone like Jamey and destroy him and how many versions of my brother are there who weren’t rescued by somebody like Chris’s big brother?

“WRU?” Akio’s face twists, an ugly pain written across it. “They’re one of our team’s sponsors. I’ve never thought about how… oh my god. I, I never liked… I mean, none of us are, like, political about it because you can’t be if you want an Olympic career, not really, but we all kind of hated taking the money. My coach thinks it’s good because it gets people off the street, which is super fucked up, but…” His iced coffee thunks down on the table. 

“What?”

“Oh shit. Oh holy fuck. They’ve been sponsoring us since we met with the old governor - he’s the one who hooked our coach up with their marketing team, and… oh my god. I’m gonna be fucking sick. WRU’s been my sponsor since like… a year after Tristan died-... didn’t die, I guess...”

“You didn’t know,” Ben whispers, staring down at Joanne Botham’s profile photo, scrolling through the profile picture photo album. He’s not maybe the smartest person on earth, but he can put two and two together for four. Tristan Higgs’s parents died, he goes to his aunt - who works for a human pet company - and he’s dead, supposedly, four months later. 

Time passes. No sign of supposed dead boy.

Then Chris, identical in every way, appears with no memory of his life and a thousand traumas to heal from, rescued from something that Ben doesn’t know the details of, but he doesn’t have to. 

Life as a pet, a life that made him terrified of bad weather and scared of people who raise their hands too quickly, unable to say no to anything when he gets scared, nervous about big vans with no windows, someone who says stupid fucking bullshit like silence is better than stammering when he’s upset, who sometimes has screaming nightmares that Laken has to wake him from that he refuses to explain to them...

Meanwhile, Aunt Joanne is putting up photos of herself traveling internationally, buying a new house, a new car, stuff she couldn’t afford to do before.

The math does itself.

It’s fucking true crime textbook, and it’s right in front of his eyes.

Akio’s jaw is working, and his eyes are glimmering again. He looks at Ben, and he looks weirdly lost and young, and Ben reaches out without thinking and grabs onto his hand. Akio grips on tight. His hand is warm, almost too warm, but also it’s the perfect amount of warm. “Do you think-... do you think she-”

Ben thinks about Jamey, scared and alone. He thinks about Jamey - and Tristan, the two of them mixing together in his mind - being dragged away, to be lost and overwritten, because no one was there to stop it.

Because someone did it on purpose.

Because no one stopped it.

“I think maybe she was lying to you because she didn’t want you to take Tristan,” Ben says, softly. “I think maybe she wanted to-... make money on him.”

Akio chokes, and leans forward, and Ben holds his hand as tightly as he can, feeling the other man’s fingers tremble in his grip. “I can't-... I can't even begin to deal with that, I just… So h-how did he end up in college? Pets don’t-... go to school, they’re not capable… are they?"

"Um. It depends, apparently?" Ben doesn’t know how much of this is something Chris would ever allow him to share. But Akio’s eyes raise, and catch his again, and Ben smiles, just a little, in an attempt to comfort. “He was rescued,” He says, softly. “I don’t know how, or when. He’d have to tell you that himself. But he’s, um. He’s just Chris now.”

“He’s just Chris, now.” Akio groans resting his head on his hand. “But not Tristan. So he really is dead, his body’s still just-.. walking around.”

“No,” Ben says, and leans in, getting Akio to look at him again. “He’s not gone. Not, like, the core of him, I think. We knew him as soon as we saw him on your video. We knew the smile, and how he moves, all of it. Everybody in the room knew him as soon as we saw him smile at you. He’s still there, he’s still him. I promise.”

“I knew it was him on your stuff as soon as I saw him dancing,” Akio says, brokenly. “H-he always did get obsessed with those fuh-fucking musicals and we used to make up routines to th-them-” His head drops, shoulders shaking, and Ben puts his other hand on Akio’s shoulder, moves around the edge of the little circular table, so he can put an arm around him. 

“It’s okay,” He whispers. “It’s okay.”

“It’s not,” Akio says, muffled. “It’s not okay. We should have saved him, w-we didn’t know, we didn’t know she would… he probably th-thought we didn’t care... the social worker said it was fine, we’re not re-relatives, we didn’t know he wasn’t dead, we didn’t know he wasn’t gone, I thought I l-lost him and he probably thinks I didn’t even give a fuck-”

“I’m sure he never thought that,” Ben says, softly, and Akio’s hair brushes a little against the side of his face and he tries not to think too hard about how nice that feels, this is not the time or place, Benjamin, stop thinking about his hair stop it stop it stop it.

“We thought... “

“I know. But… you found him, now. He’s found.”

Akio sniffs back tears, mumbling, “Can I see him?”

Ben hesitates. “He needs-... he might need some time.”

Akio nods without looking up, but he leans a little on Ben. “I’m sorry, I’m being a fucking moron about this, making you comfort me and you don’t even know me, but I just-... missed him, and mourned him, and we go to see is parents wh-where they’re buried every year on the day that his aunt said he-... Is he h-happy? Now?”

Ben closes his eyes. That’s what I’d want to know, isn’t it, if it was Jamey. Is he happy now? Does his new family sign, do they know how to calm him down when it’s too much, do they know, do they care, if I’m not there does someone love him as much as we did?

I’d claw my way out of the fucking grave to make sure someone loves Jamey as much as he deserves.

“He’s happy,” Ben says, softly. “He was adopted by the guy who saved him, I think. There’s a whole lot I don’t know, you know, it’s not really my-... my story to, um, to tell. I just know some of it. He’s, um, he’s with someone, and… he’s… he’s happy.”

“Good. I just-... I want to see him.”

“I know. I’ll ask. But his partner... I’m friends with them, and they, um, he’s n-not... not okay right now, so...”

“I can wait.” Akio looks at him, intense, intent, eyes so dark Ben could fall in. “I’ve waited this long, I can-... I can wait a little longer, I just... I just want to see him, when he can see me.”

The bell over the door chimes again, and the two of them turn and look to see a woman who could not be more obviously Akio’s mother entering, looking at them, her eyebrows furrowed in immediate worry when she sees the tears on Akio’s face. “Aki?”

“It’s him, Mom,” Akio says, and she moves to him as if drawn, and Ben fights himself to pull back and away, to watch mother and son. Tristan had this, and lost it, but Chris has it, too. Life, interrupted at the second act, begun again with new actors around the main character. “It’s definitely-... it’s Tristan. But, she-... I have to tell you what happened to him. He, they-they made him a, um, a pet-”

She hitches in a breath, pulls a chair with a loud scrape from another table, and sits, looking Ben over, expression serious. “Tell me,” She says, softly, but fiercely. 

“It’s, um, it’s a lot…”

“I’ve got time.” Ben is reminded of his own mother, in the simple steel flashing under her perfectly styled hair and carefully done makeup. Her eyes are red around the edges, too. She lays a cool, dry hand over Ben’s, and her dark eyes bore into him with focused intensity. “Tell me what happened to our Tris. I want to know what happened to-... I want to know what I didn’t stop.”

Akio looks sidelong at his mother, putting an arm around her, and he’s shorter than his mom but she seems to sag against him, and he can see how Akio takes after his mom, with the same wide mouth that normally seems always on the verge of a smile, the same dark eyes flashing with anger and guilt. “M-Mom, you couldn’t have known, we couldn’t do anything-”

“I could have gone to that woman’s… house, or wherever she was, and taken Tristan right out the door, and I didn’t,” Aimi says, and her voice doesn’t shake, but her face is bright red and her eyes are overbright and glittering. “I could have called lawyers, or the cops, I could have tried to fight for him and I didn’t. Ronnie deserved-” Her voice catches and her hand is over her mouth. Ben watches her eyes well up, her struggle to calm herself, throat working as she swallows and leans into her son’s embrace. “Ronnie… would have wanted someone to fight for him. I want to know what happened because I did the normal thing and not the right thing, because I didn’t let myself see it. I want to know what exactly it is that I didn’t stop when I had the chance.”

Ben sits back, takes a breath. 

“He, um. His name is… Chris now,” Ben starts, slowly. “Christopher Stanton. He’s, um, he’s a sophomore in college, and… he was a human pet, for a while. We don’t know how long, nobody knows for sure, or who had him. I mean, I guess he knows and I think his brother knows, but h-he, won’t… won’t tell anyone who it was.”

Aimi’s whole body shudders, but her face doesn’t change, and her eyes don’t leave Ben’s. “H-how-”

Akio licks at his lips, and hesitantly says, “Ben thinks maybe that aunt they sent him to sold him. She works for WRU.”

Aimi’s eyes slowly close, and her breathing is slow but trembling. The two young men watch her. Akio’s knee bumps his under the table, and he doesn’t think about that, either, except it’s all he’s going to think about for the rest of the day.

“Okay,” Aimi says, after a long pause, and her eyes open again. A kind of perfect calm settles itself across the pain in her expression. 

Ben thinks that this woman is probably fucking terrifying if it’s you she’s angry with and not herself. 

“Mom, if we need to stop, that’s okay-”

“We don’t. Ben-... that’s your name? Ben?”

“Uh, yeah… Benjamin Prentiss, but-... call me Ben.” 

Prentiss, Akio mouths to himself, and Ben hopes, in another weird moment, that Akio likes his last name. 

“Got it.” Aimi leans forward, smacks the table with one hand. Ben flinches. Her jaw sets. She’s definitely terrifying. Like his own mother when they tried to kick Jamey out of school, this is a woman who could stare down the sun itself unblinking and walk away undamaged, if the sun was a threat to her children. “Ben?”

“Yes, um, Mrs. Nakamura?”

“Keep talking. Tell me everything about Tristan-”

“Chris.” He clears his throat. “He’s, um, his name is Chris.”

“... tell me everything about Chris.”

--

Tagging: @burtlederp, @finder-of-rings, @endless-whump, @whumpfigure, @slaintetowhump, @astrobly  @newandfiguringitout  , @doveotions  , @pretty-face-breaker  , @boxboysandotherwhump  , @oops-its-whump  @moose-teeth  , @cubeswhump  , @cupcakes-and-pain  @whump-tr0pes  @whumpiary  @orchidscript

[puppypeter]

Stucky/(Evanstan) x Queer Eye AU prompt?

Please I was re-watching season 5 cause I needed a pick me up playing in the background and episode 6 (the one with the 40 years old Dj) made me think....

This guy is almost 40, already has a family home, can barely cook, has a close relationship with his family, the house looks amazing in the common areas but his room is a mess, really really wants a family but cannot seem to find the one no matter how many woman he meets and/or dates, spends his time between a day job and dj-ing at night, fratboy-ish for his age, gets tanned and wears tank tops and caps.......

Imagine Steve (or Chris) in an AU being sort of like this guy and his parents/friends call the Queer Eye guys to help him out. Of course they all go mental over him, this good hearted giant. But when they get into his room they start seeing signs of what is not going well. Stashing food in his closet, bit of a mess from Dodger, unmade bed, scattered mess, a reflection of his internal struggle. And they start to help him out in the different parts that they specialize in... now for Bucky (Sebastian)'s introduction:

They're all at his home, maybe when Tan gets Steve dressed in his new clothes to show them off and do a fashion show for the others. So Steve is already flustered and then keys jingle and the door opens and everyone shuts up and Bucky walks in looking like an angel with his pretty eyes and pretty mouth and pretty long hair, a reusable tote bag on his shoulder and a couple of grocery paper bags in his arms "Stevieee are you up? I haven't heard from you for a couple of days I was starting to get worried you weren't feeling well again!! Come down I brought your favourite smoo-" and then he turns into the living room where they all are and is 😳😳😳 "What's..what..'s going on?" while he blushes to death and looks at Steve in that suit up and down multiple times cause he looks like a snack (daddy!!!!!). And Steve is blushing and the Queer Eye guys are just like 😯😯😯😏😏😏🤭🤭🤭😈😈😈 "oh. ooooooh". They can see now why Steve cannot seem to find the one. Cause he's been pining over his best-friend since forever but is apparently too blind to see the way Bucky looks at him, how he takes care of him (even on the days he struggles to get out of bed), how well Bucky fits with his family, how they all love him already... but he never thought... Bucky is his best-friend and a dude!!! Queue bit of a cry over Karamo's shoulder and discussing his sexuality and why he hadn't been able to admit it to himself even if deep down he knew... and of course it ends with the Queer Eye guys watching him host a family dinner at his house and Bucky is there and they got together so he comes out to his family and takes Bucky hand, sheds a few tears (out of fear and relief) and everyone is SO non-impressed like 'duh' about fucking time...

[punkcupcakestyles]

Love Song

Part 15

Catch Up!

Sofia Welsh-De La Rosa and Timothée Chalamet will star in new Amazon series and, honestly, I won’t talk about anything else ever again

Amazon Prime has just announced the release of its new original series set in 1970’s New York. According to Hollywood Reporter, the new series will be lead by Sofia Welsh - De La Rosa, Timothée Chalamet, and Logan Lerman, and will be produced by Jordan Peele (Get Out and Us) and directed by Christina Hodson (Birds of Prey). The ambitious project is in talks with some other big names in Hollywood, such as Meryl Streep and even Robert de Niro, to join the series.

Honestly, I’m gagging. 

This might come as a surprise as both Sofia, who has been enjoying lots of Oscar’s buzz for the third year in a row, and Timothèe are on the prime of their movie careers, as two of the most prominent young actors in Hollywood, but according to many sources, Sofia has been looking for a way to work with Peele for a long time, while Timothèe is excited to add some action to his resume, after his role in Hostiles and The King. Also, rumor has it, Amazon is willing to pay a hefty (and I mean hefty) amount of money to sign the young stars. 

As for Logan Lerman, this is his the actor’s first TV role since 2005 and is set to be his comeback after his career faded a bit to the background. With the star-studded cast, Amazon is hoping this to be the platform’s next big hit. 

There is no doubt that Sofia, Timothèe, and Logan are three of THE most talented young actors today, with Sofia being the reigning queen of the pack. Recently, the actress has played a pirate, a thief, a devious courtesan and a feminist writer trying to bring down love, and she’s been rumored to have just signed a deal with Disney to play her very own princess, as well as an undisclosed character in MCU’s highly anticipated Black Widow. She truly has the range, Darling!

Sofia was seen having coffee with Timothèe early in the week, before the show’s announcement, which sparked rumors that the actress had ended things with Harry Styles after he had dinner with his ex in London. She was also seen leaving the James Corden Late Late Night’s studio with Logan...

@BobbyC I’m sorry but all of them are gay...

@Peanutbuttah Eh, she can’t act anyway

@Loveisloud @peanutbuttah She can act, she has been in commercial and art-house movies and has received rave reviews every time. You just don’t like her because she’s dating your fave. 

@Arewethereyet she’s an sl*t. So glad Harry’s done with her…

@Soph Are you drunk Buzzfeed? One does not leave Harry Styles for anyone!

****

Harry was cooking. 

The air smelled like garlic and butter and I breathed in deeply, just realizing how fucking hungry I was, as I followed him to the kitchen. It just occurred to me that I hadn’t eaten anything that day, other than a cup of coffee that Harry had made me in the morning. It was a little strong for my taste, I liked mine with sugar, even when my mom kept telling me I was being violently disrespectful to coffee. I didn’t care, not one bit. 

I never really ate on interviews or auditions days, it made my tummy feel funny and I was usually afraid that my clothes wouldn’t fit like they were supposed to after, so, no food for me, thank you. Usually, D would force-feed me as soon as we were done, practically shoving fruits, nuts, and salads down my throat (sometimes even a burger!), but today I was way too anxious and excited to even pay attention to her efforts. I was going on a date with Harry, I couldn’t care less about anything else!!!

And now, I was fucking hungry and it smelled even better in the kitchen.

“I didn’t know you cooked,” I smiled, looking at the pasta that was boiling on the stove and the bubbling alfredo sauce. Grilled prawns and a green salad were carefully plated in rustic blue and gold plates.

My eyes traveled to him, and I saw him hesitate for a second before he gifted me with a shy smile. He was so lovely, it was no surprise that my head became fuzzy every time I was around him. Even the most superficial thought struggled to grab a hold to my brain. I wondered if anyone could keep their wits around him, but somehow, I doubted it.

“It takes my mind off of things,” he finally said. “And I kinda wanted to impress you, I guess.” 

The admission made my heart soar in my chest and I beamed at him as he stood in front of me. I admired his beauty for a second, his skin was slightly tanned and it looked almost delicious against the white fabric of his shirt, and his smile was warm, making me feel giddy as he trapped me against the counter with his arms on each side of my body. 

I wanted to kiss him, so so badly, but instead, I let my fingers brush over his neck until they reached the tips of his hair. It tickled and he laughed softly with the most wonderful smile.

“Really?” I asked him softly, cause I didn’t want to break the intimate moment we were sharing. 

“Yeah. A bit silly, innit?”

“No, it’s not silly. But, if you wanted to impress me, then you should’ve made a chocolate lava cake,” I teased. “You would’ve gotten me, then.”

“Chocolate, uh?” The right corner of his lip shot upwards, and an adoring feeling hit me right in the chest like a tidal wave. 

“Yeap.”

“I’ll keep it in mind for next time,” Harry muttered, his words getting lost in the air as he leaned down to kiss me.

I realized that it was all I wanted: To kiss him slowly, maybe even for hours. But I knew I had to stop him. I was under his spell and there was nothing I could do about it, nothing I wanted to do, anyway. But even I could admit that this was just a dream, one that I wanted to remember every second of. So when he was gone, I would still have those memories. 

So before his lips could brush mine, before he could melt my brain with his kisses, I pressed my forehead to his and dropped my hands to his chest, right where his heart was beating rapidly. 

“Sorry,” I said shyly, casting my eyes down so I wouldn’t have to look at him, not a few more seconds, not until I had gathered the will to stand strong by my decision. 

“Is there something wrong?” His voice was full of sincere concern, a little bit rougher as well, which made his accent more noticeable. 

“No,” I shook my head, finally looking into his green eyes. “Everything’s perfect.”

“You just don’t want me to kiss you?”

“It’s just...I want to remember every bit of tonight,” I said, as I tried to ease the utter embarrassment that was crawling over my chest. Who said stuff like that? Writers in cheesy movies or bad teen shows. Fuck. 

“Except for my kisses?” He insisted, almost like a little boy fishing for reassurance. I brought my fingers to his cheek and grazed them it until he smiled at me. 

The answer was “fuck, no”. His kisses were a memory I wanted to carry with me forever. But I also wanted to have that night, so I could carry it with me, and compare it to every other date, every other person that would come my way. 

“I want to remember the little details,” I said, shrugging my shoulders. “The dinner you made, which is really close to burning, the grandpa pants…”

“Hey! These look cool! And the sauce, I have it under control!”

“If you say so,” I sneered mischievously, twisting my lips into a mocking smile as he pretended to be offended. “And I want to remember everything you did to make me feel special”

Harry’s arms looped around my waist as he pulled me to his chest and I hugged him back and looked at him, battling the need to just lean in and kiss him. His lips were so pink. 

We both sucked at the whole “no kissing allowed” thing, and somehow that made me feel a lot better. For once, I wasn’t the needy, dreamy one. 

“What do you think?” I asked in a whisper, smiling against the brush of his lips as he bumped our noses together.

“I want to kiss you, Sof, all fucking night long,” he pouted. “Been thinking ‘bout it all day.”

“I’ll make it up to you. Just...lemme have this, yeah?”

“Why?”

“Cause…” I laughed embarrassedly. “I already have your kisses in a little folder in my brain. Now I wanna have this.”

“Is it just me in that folder?” Harry asked, suddenly interested in some other thing that frowning. Curiosity and amusement were burning in his stare and I rolled my eyes at him, almost scoffing at the fact that was the only thing that had managed to catch his attention. 

“Mostly you…” I conceded, even though the petty part of me was all for rolling out with a long list of names before I got to his name. “And Sebastian Stan…” I said, not being able to resist it. 

“Bucky Barnes?” His eyebrows twisted in confusion and he looked at me as I licked my lips, considering just how weird I wanted my answer to be.  

“And the cartoon, too...” I replied, a little bit too casually for it to go unnoticed, but Harry didn’t seem to notice, cause as he was nodding thoughtfully, his hands traveled to my neck again, making me look at him as he dipped his head down to reach the curve of my neck. 

“That’s a bit greedy, baby,” He whispered against my skin, pressing soft kisses down to my pulse point. I wasn’t sure if that was technically a kiss, and I didn’t care, it felt so good. “Someone else?” He was cheating, and we both knew it. I could feel his smile growing bigger, and I sighed as he grazed his teeth over the curve of my neck and let his tongue soothe my skin. “Babe?” He insisted, just to tease me. It was hard to think, and he knew it, but I wasn’t going to admit it just yet. 

“Uh.” I licked my lips and struggled for a second, as I struggled to remember what was it that I was going to say. “Chris Evans, “ I began. “and uh, Michael B. Jordan. Mmm… and Logan Lerman.”

“Isn’t that the guy you’re gonna work with?” He asked, stopping suddenly to look at me. I fluttered my eyes open and smiled when they could finally focus on him. 

“Yeah, him and Timothée Chalamet.”

“Mmmm...I don’t know if I want to share my folder with them,” Harry pouted, which made me laugh. I realized it was no laughing matter, but still, a warm, almost giddy, laughter kept bubbling out of my tummy. 

“Why? Does it make you jealous, H?” I teased.

“Should I be?”

“Mmmm...I don’t know. I honestly think I would let Logan fuck me...those eyes, man.”

“So funny, S…” Harry rolled his eyes. He was not as amused as I had expected him to be. 

“You shouldn’t be,” I said softly, looking him in the eyes, serious and sincere.  

“You sure?” He asked and I was sure he wasn’t talking about Logan Lerman anymore. 

“I’m sure, baby.” I wasn’t even lying. “So, who’s in yours?” I asked, cause maybe that’d take attention away from myself. I didn’t think things through though, cause he had a whole bunch of options for his answer. Who could it be? One of his supermodel exes? His singer ex? This wasn’t a fun game at all. 

“You.”

“Oh, so THAT’S how you answer that kind of question!!” I exclaimed, which made him laugh, and, as he did so, his dimples showed on his face, making him look a little boyish. He was fucking pretty, Jesus. 

“I’m not even trying to be a good boyfriend here,” Harry chuckled, and I relished on the way the word `boyfriend” sounded out of his lips. So pretty, so fucking pretty. “My folder is called “When Sof’s not around”, and I think we need to fill it up, so I don’t run out of thoughts.”

“Oh, we don’t want that,” I scrunched up my nose and shook my head at him as a smile played on my lips. I was so fucking happy and I couldn’t even figure out why. 

“No, we don’t.” The tip of his tongue lapped across his pink lips, and I followed it with my eyes, taking a second or two before I peered up to him again. “I was hoping we could kiss all night,” he said softly. “and maybe I could eat you out by the pool.”

“I didn’t bring a swimsuit…”

“You wouldn’t need one, baby,” Harry laughed, a mix of mischief and endearment lacing with it. I couldn’t stop staring at him, and my knees wobbled a bit as he leaned down, bumping our noses together one more time, as the soft brush of his lips against my skin made me shiver. 

“Don’t cheat,” I whispered and his soft laugh echoed down in every inch of my body. His lips grazed over my forehead, as he pressed a soft kiss to my skin. 

“Ok, baby. We’ll do it your way.”

“Thank you.”

“I think it’s silly, y’know?” He started, pushing me back so he could look at me with his bright green eyes. “We’re just starting, Sof.”

****

I wanted to kiss him. 

I looked at him, licking a spoonful of dessert with my head propped on my hand as I listened to him talk, but all I could think of was how much I wanted to lick the trace of chocolate out of his lips. 

“Is there something wrong, S?” I noticed there wasn’t much concern in his voice, not like there usually was when he asked me if I was ok. This time, there was a hint of mockery, almost as if he knew exactly what I was thinking and that all I wanted to do was to sit on his lap and press soft kisses from his jaw to his lips. 

Fuck.

“No,” I smiled sweetly, cause I wasn’t one to go down without a fight, and I took his hand in mine and pressed it to my lips before I looked at him again. 

“Were you distracted?” His smile was turning more devilish as the seconds went by and I felt myself get warm as he leaned closer, his hands dropping to my thigh and pressing softly to it.

He wasn’t gonna win. I was not going to let him. 

“Nope,” I said, letting the ‘p’ pop between my lips. “Tell me about your album, I promise I’ll be a grown-up about it.” 

“Nice save…” Harry chuckled. “I think you’re gonna like it.”

“I have recently discovered that I’m a very jealous person. I don’t think I’ll like it, but I’ll be happy for you.”

“You shouldn’t be jealous.” A smile tugged on his lips and I felt warm, so warm inside, I couldn’t help but smile as well. “And I think you’re like it, especially since I made a few last-minute changes, against Jeff’s will.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, he kept saying I had the guts, the audacity to change the album when we’re about to drop the first single.”

“What changes?” I insisted, because Jeff’s feelings were the least of my concern at the moment. 

I wished I could have played it cool. Maybe that would’ve made me look more interesting, aloof, unapproachable, and all those things a girl should be in front of her crush. But my heart was racing and the world was turning chaotic as my head ticked, like a tiny little bomb. 

I needed to know. 

Tick, tick. 

“You’re already sure you’re not gonna like it,” Harry smirked, surely unaware of the mess inside my head. “You might as well wait for it.”

No!!! TIck tick. 

“Oh, please, please, pretty please?? What’s the advantage of this if I can’t get a tiny sneak peek?”

“Well, for instance, you get me to cook for you…”

“It was delicious, thank you.”

“And you get me to eat you out at night when you’re not being stubborn and imposing kiss-bans.”

“I like that very much, too,” I giggled, looking at his green eyes as he got just a bit closer, just an inch away from me. 

“So it’s not such a bad deal, is it?”

“I guess not.”

“Good.” His bottom lip rolled into his lips and he bit it thoughtfully for a couple of seconds as his eyes kept burning little holes into my soul. That’s how it felt. “Let’s watch a movie, baby. Are there any bans on cuddling?”

“No, not yet.”

His fingers squeezed mine and he got up swiftly from the table, smiling brightly as we covered the few steps to a different room near the pool, where a giant screen awaited for us. There were a bunch of individuals blue chair, blue and velvety, and a larger one, that was meant to comfortably fit two. The room was dark, only lit by the lights coming from the screen, and I followed him blindly until we were sitting side by side. Slowly, we found each other, and as Harry sat against the armchair, I settled between his legs, cuddling up to his chest while his large hand rested on the curve of my waist. 

He smelled like a lazy Sunday morning when the rain is lightly tapping on your windows and all you can hear are the chirping birds when still early, so the world hasn’t woken up just yet and you get to focus on that feeling, on the promise of what’s coming. 

He also smelled like pasta and chocolate, and I didn’t mind that at all. 

He felt soft, comforting, and sweet, but above all, he felt safe. I was safe with him. 

And, I struggled for a bit, trying to understand what came next, what was the warmth and giddiness that settled in my tummy every time I looked at him. 

“You ok, baby?” Harry asked and I nodded absentmindedly, not ready to let my thoughts go just yet. What was it? “Wanna watch Set It Up?”

“Yeah, whatever you want. your choice.”

“Are you sure you’re ok? You don’t say that often.”

“Oh, shhh, Harry I always do whatever you want.”

“We definitely have different definitions of ‘Whatever Harry wants’” He mused and I propped myself up to look at him, almost suspiciously, almost angry.

“Do we? What do you want?” I asked. 

“To kiss you. And for you to stay the night.”

“I have a bed, y’know?” I quirked my eyebrow, looking at him as I had already won the argument. 

“Yeah, unfortunately…”

“And we promised we would behave tonight.”

“You can stay in a different room,” he offered. “Or I will.”

“What’s the point then?”

“You won’t have to miss me in the morning…” he shrugged. I laughed out loud, despite my best efforts to look offended. “And I won’t have to miss you.”

“I’ll think about it.”

Love. 

He looked a lot like love. 

And love looked a lot like him. 

***

Harry Styles and Sofia Welsh were out grabbing Fro-yo and I’ll never be as cool as either of them

Yes, I know what you’re gonna say: Are they paying you to write this sh*t? And the answer is yes! someone’s paying me to write this sh*t! Alas, neither Harry nor Sofia is. I wish. 

The usually private couple, and bear in mind I am using the word couple loosely here as they haven’t confirmed to be dating, gave the world a glimpse of their relationship as they stepped out in Los Angeles to grab ice-creams and bubble teas, along with friends.

Ever since the rumors of their relationship spread around, the couple has been mostly keeping a low profile - which is not very surprising as Harry Styles is not very open about his personal life since he was a member of One Direction and a large part of his fans believed him to be romantically involved with one of his bandmates (that was a mouthful! And also very true, there has been a lot of conspiracy theories about it)

Sofia, who’s in the middle of an Oscar campaign (and has been showing us just how much designers adore her), sported a pair of leggings, a crop top, and a large blazer, a perfect outfit for the ever-changing LA weather, and looked happy and relaxed as she waited for Harry to get their orders. Both stars took photos with fans and left together in Styles’ classic car…

****

We were made out of good intentions. 

We slept together that night and every night after that for an entire week. We didn’t do much, we kissed and cuddled, and spent our mornings lazily together until one of us had to go out to the real world. We even went out and we kept stealing looks and smiles at each other, like two little kids that were too shy in front of their crushes. 

Photos were taken. Articles were published. Midge was elated. 

Harry’s new single was coming out that night, and there was going to be a party to celebrate it. If it was a hit, they were going to celebrate their success and all the hard work that went into it. It was a flop, and it was not going to flop, they were going to drink for better times ahead. 

“Fuck!!!” 

I stared at the ceiling, willing my body to move and failing miserably at it as every little muscle in my body contracted painfully. My arms hurt, and my legs felt like they were on fire. 

I just needed 5 more minutes before I got up and got ready to leave. 

It was day 4 of “my new life” as my trainer liked to call it, and after another lunch of grilled chicken and steamed broccoli, I was ready to quit. I had trained and dieted before for different roles, but this time, I had a feeling she wanted to suck the life out of me. It even made me reconsider if I needed to be in a Marvel Movie. Would Midge kill me if I quit?

“Sof…” The male voice scared me just a little, as I thought I was alone in my house. I turn around just slightly, as much as my tired poor body could handle and smiled as I saw Sam standing by my door. “Can I come in?”

He was holding a tray, with something that looked like a sandwich, coffee, and a glass of water, along with a white bottle of medicine. I nodded, grunting even at the soft movement, and he walked quickly to my bed, setting the tray down before me as he stood awkwardly. 

“Shouldn’t you be at work?” I struggled to ask while I propped myself up and sat criss-cross on my bed. I sounded angry, and maybe I was, why would he bring me a sandwich? It was all I wanted to eat and all I couldn’t eat at the same time. 

“I’m off work today, and I wanted to check on you. Cat told me you’ve been feeling under the weather. I called your mom and she told me you should “just eat a sandwich and take an aspirin”, so here they are,” he said, offering me a childish smile as he pointed the tray with a little too much joy. 

“I can’t eat a sandwich,” I sulked. “And I need to get ready, I have to go to Harry’s.”

“You can eat a sandwich. And he can wait 5 minutes, you’re always there.”

I realized we hadn’t talked about the kiss, not really. I avoided being alone with him, and whenever the occasion presented itself, Sam would go out of the room, giving me space and maybe waiting for me to be the first one to reach out. I had never done that. Honestly, I didn’t think I would.

“You’re right, Sammy,” I said, picking the sandwich in my hands and noticing that he had already cut the crust off. “Thank you.”

It was weird between us, tense and quiet, and I didn’t like it. I bit into the bread looking at an empty spot on the wall as I waited for him to say something. Anything, I would take it. But Sam remained silent, pressing his palms on his thighs as he went to get up. 

“Sam,” I called for him and I smiled shyly when he finally turned around. He took his time, though, and for a moment there, I was scared he was going to leave. “I’m sorry.”

“That’s not what you want to hear when someone you like kisses you.”

“I shouldn’t have…”

“Did you want to?”

“Yes,” I breathed and I realized I wasn't lying. I did want to kiss him, there was no use in denying that. 

I put the sandwich down on the plate and moved closer to Sam until I could see the golden freckles that were hidden in his light brown eyes.

“Do you remember that night when you came through my window and stayed the night with me?”

“Yeah, I heard your dad scream, and I wanted to be there in case…”

“I know, Sam. I’ve wanted to kiss you ever since then,” I admitted and he kept staring at me as if he was considering what his next move would be. Would he kiss me? Did I want him to kiss me?

“You’re not being fair to me, Sof.”

“I know. You haven’t been fair to me either, but here we are.”

There was a moment of panic, cause for a second, I thought he was going to kiss me. He leaned over me and I held my breath as I looked at him, not able to stop him just yet. But as his lips brushed over my forehead, I closed my eyes, smiling as he pulled away from me. 

“Eat the fucking sandwich, Sof,” he replied and it wasn’t enough. I took his hand before he could leave and I licked my lips, peering up to him with something more than just fear pressing up to my chest. 

“Are we good?”

“Yeah.”

“I guess we’ll talk about it again when he gets back with his ex.”

That was a low blow, and we both knew it, but I just stayed quiet as he left the room, wondering if I deserved it. 

****

It took me a while to get ready, so I was late for Harry’s party. I went straight to the pool, where a large screen had been set up and the new video seemed to be on a loop. I couldn’t find Harry anywhere, but at the same, he was all I could see. I stared at the screen, looking at his golden skin as he was surrounded by the adoring crowd, at the way they kept touching and the expression on his face as he leaned into them. The song didn’t even matter, cause all I could focus on was his stupidly beautiful green eyes. 

I mean, I had watched his videos before. I had seen him fly through the sky and be surrounded by kids, but this was different. Those were entertaining and beautiful, and I felt the emotion in my tummy simply because it was him, and somehow, just seeing him made me happy. But in this one he meant to capture your attention and a little bit of your soul. He wanted to be desired and to be free along the way. And it was such a fucking sexy video.  

I lost count of how many times I allowed myself to watch the video, but it was probably too many times. After a while, I decided it was time to look for the real Harry, who was still nowhere to be seen, so I left the pool, smiling and greeting everyone as I passed by. 

I hoped he was alone, cause I wanted to fucking kiss him like no one else was looking. I wanted to tell him how lovely, talented, and amazing he was. I was going to kiss him a lot and praise him, it couldn’t get better than that. 

I looked for him in the living room, where a small crowd was throwing back cocktails and beers and went out to the front door, where people were lounging about, a bit drunkenly. But he wasn’t anywhere, and I was starting to feel uneasy. 

It took me more than a few minutes to make my way to his room because people kept getting in my way. I did my best to smile and engage in silly conversations about nothing, but my heart was growing heavy and my brain was too anxious to even remember if I had succeeded. 

I heard him talk even before I stood by his door. I couldn’t quite tell what he was saying or who he was talking to, but I noticed that his words were a little bit slurred, and his accent dripped thick in his low voice. The door was slightly ajar and I pushed it open and stood by the frame as I saw him talking on the phone. He had his back to me, so he didn’t notice that I had arrived, not that it mattered. 

“C, you’re drunk,” I heard him say and I wished he had just said a different name. “No...I know I told you it was just a PR relationship...Cause I need time to figure out...Really, C? Wanna know if I still love you? You’re not being fair...” The last part came out as a dry laugh, and I knew I had to leave, it was rude and inappropriate, but, most importantly, it was breaking my fucking heart. But my feet seemed like they were made out of cement, and my legs had chosen that moment to numb out of pain. So, I was still standing there when he turned around, and probably saw the tears that were threatening to spill down my eyes. 

I wanted to know the answer too. Could I know it? It’d save us a lot of pain. 

“Bye, C.”

He dropped his phone to the bed and I looked at him as he walked quickly to me. He looked flustered and worried, but it all seemed so distant, that it didn’t matter. 

“Baby,” Harry said, but that wasn’t my name. Did her call her baby too? He probably did, he was a ‘baby’ kind of guy. “Are you ok?”

“Yes, I was looking for you cause I wanted to check if you wanted me to post something on Instagram,” I lied. “D already drafted a tweet, it’s really simple.”

“Sof, how much did you hear?”

“Nothing. I’m gonna get a couple of photos and uh, I’m gonna go home, I think I need a rest day.”

His hand went to grab mine, but before he could do it, I turned and walked away rushing down the stairs until I could get lost in the crowd. 

Fair? None of us was being fair. 

[calypsoff]

Sixty Nine.

I think it’s taken me at least two days to recover from such an event, I have been such a mess. I can personally say that I felt terrible but also it was a good night, I am just catching up on everything. Like I can Google search my name and I have headlines about my birthday, I mean some are clowning at me crying, but jealous niggas do that, and it is annoying me. I am just looking at Dennis’ page, he posted a few pictures of the event, it’s nice what he put about me, but I think I am going to just snap on jealous niggas because I can’t be dealing thinking they can clown me, jealous motherfuckers like her ex’s like why are you checking for me, I ain’t checking for you but you there writing lines about me on social media, it’s weak. I really haven’t had the chance to actually speak to Robyn properly and actually say to her what she has done for me, I am just recovering. I know for a fact I haven’t ever drank like that in my life, I am missing hours of my life that I don’t remember. Pressing record as I stared at myself in the in the camera “I look rough, I need a shave” clearing my throat looking up at Rajad walking into the kitchen “I just want to thank everyone for the birthday wishes, as you know I had a very good night. It’s late but I just want to say thank you to everyone, I seen the birthday wishes just now because I am of course just catching up, feel rough still” I sighed out “I just thought I would do a video instead of just typing it out, I don’t do social media beef. You got an issue we can deal with it personally, just like I did before. I seen niggas clowning me, but I don’t care, I cried because I appreciate what my wife did and y’all can call me a bitch nigga, but she went above and beyond and I love her, she is my other half. Niggas don’t know what love is and it shows but a certain nigga, I see you and I ain’t scared to beat ya ass again” stopping the video just before Robyn walked in, I pressed send to put it onto my IG story.

Robyn sniggered at me “are you with us now? I can’t believe how long you been in bed for, baby two whole days?!” locking my phone and placing it on the counter, moving away from the counter “wow, I was a mess Robyn. I don’t drink like that, I don’t. Weed and booze, it was just. It took me out but man, I am just catching up with everything” shuffling towards Robyn, pecking her lips before hugging her close “oh my god, I just feel like I have missed out so much for those days. Thank you for taking care of me too” squeezing Robyn close “love you” Robyn cooed out “it’s ok, I know you was unwell but I am glad you’re with us” moving back from the hug “I have so much to thank you for, after you left everything was a blur, I do remember when I was dancing with Drake actually but then I was out” sitting on top of the counter “I am glad you’re ok, to see you in such a happy place Chris, I love to see it. I am so glad that the party was great, people keep talking about it” nodding my head “you got me so good Robyn, just thinking about it now I am emotional again. All of your family too, like Mel and Noella buying me a personal plate, like what? That is crazy, I feel like I am celebrating my twenty first again, it’s wild. It’s made up for every birthday I missed, I can’t thank you enough. I appreciate you Robyn and I got a little something, I may have been dying in bed, but I been planning, my family are coming to the home” Robyn’ eyes widened “erm, the home is a mess Chris. You didn’t say the in laws are coming” shaking my head “don’t worry about it, just that I called, and I said for them to wait another day and to come here. I appreciate you so much” Robyn stood between my legs, wrapping my arms around her “I love you so much, man. I can’t even” placing my hands over her bump “you and my daughter” Robyn gasped “you! Actually, you been talking too much when drunk, Rajad knows now. Everyone actually knows” I cringed “I am sorry, I didn’t know” she is unhappy, let me quickly start massaging her shoulders.

I am here massaging Robyn’ shoulders trying to calm her ass down, just because I know for a fact Robyn is very mad with me, I didn’t do this shit on purpose, so she needs to understand this “I just want to spend time with you, my family are leaving tomorrow too. I just think we haven’t had us time so take me away somewhere” nodding my head “I got you” kissing the back of her head “I am glad we are not having a boy, Camron kept trying to touch his dick and I was like no sir. This boy just wanted to keep touching it so honestly I am glad it isn’t” I snorted laughing “that shit don’t stop, you know how much I play with mine” I really want a son now, I need one in my life to be just like me “I think they are here” the buzzer went off “I swear I feel a mess Chris, you could have told me” Robyn moved away from me, jumping off the counter and making my way to the door. Majesty is a pest, she is always running out of the living room, these crawling babies is not it “hey, little brat” jogging over to her, picking her up and making my way to the front door Unlocking the door, oh I didn’t open the gate. Going back inside, pushing the button to open the gate. Placing my feet in the slides “hey, hey. Young lady, stop the slapping” I chuckled, shuffling outside “we were waiting for so long” my mother poked her head around and walking over to me “aww my baby boy” walking over to them “hey mom, welcome to my home” hugging my mom “son, this is amazing. Oh wow, this is very Hollywood” my dad has his glasses on, so he is really going to check every part of the home, he is in-expecting the home.

My family are so amazed by the home, this is just outside “come in, come” Majesty wrapped her arms around my neck, she is so precious “I am shocked, like this home is amazing Chris. Now I know why you love it here so much” walking back inside, Robyn side eyed me “why are you annoyed with me? You’re so annoying” I laughed at her “shut up, hey my beautiful mother in law. Look at you! The tan, you been out in the sun” I am glad I caught Robyn off guard “the family is here” Rorrey came out of the office, he has been using it, I told him to try and make his own little something for himself for my clothing line, I am open to ideas “hi boss” Rorrey shook my dad’ hand “the family is here, you never said” everyone seems annoyed I never said, maybe they wanted to make a good entrance “sis, the only person that annoys me is Chris” Robyn said to Tootie “he didn’t say anything, I have not cooked a thing. I feel so bad, your first time here and I have done nothing” I grinned “Robyn, I know your pain. He is an ass” rolling my eyes, they all mad now.

These ladies are mad “like I know y’all are mad but come on, I come in peace and honestly when you hear why, you will all love me” Robyn mean mugged me “what it is, this is the first time my mother in law has come to the home so I wanted to make an good impression but instead she has come and I look a mess, the home is a mess, I have made no food for them. It’s their first time here Chris do you not get that” I laughed a little “I do but baby my mom doesn’t mind, you’re beautiful anyways but hear me out. It’s Mother’s Day coming up so I did something nice for you all, I have the SUV coming and he taking you to a spa, all of you. I hired it out for you ladies, I will take care of Majesty and Desean, this is y’all time to have just some peace and quiet and after I am paying for the meal at Robyn’ favourite place, this is on me. Mom, Tootie, Monica, Noella and Robyn. My beautiful mother to be, Happy Mother’s Day, now can we stop the hate train” they all look pleased “really baby, oh my god. That sounds so much fun” my mom said “yeah, y’all can bitch about me there but I hired the whole place, Robyn can get the wax she needs” I snorted laughing “shut up!” she spat, her coochie need it cause she ain’t doing it “Happy Mother’s Day ladies” I grinned, Monica cooed out “he is a good man, thank you Chris” I grinned feeling so proud of myself.

I am super proud of myself “I love you” feeling a pair of arms around my torso “oh now you saying it” turning around in Robyn’ arms “you know I do, I just like to impress my guests Chris that is all. But baby that is so sweet, so you did all of that while you was in bed and I was slaving away” nodding my head “I sorted it all out for you, I want you to relax ok?” pecking Robyn’ lips “thank you and you ass, talking about wax. I want you to do it for me, how about that?” I snorted laughing “I will, if you want me too? Not in a bad way, I thought you may want to, you know. Feel fresh” wrapping my arms around Robyn “mhmm I will let you off mister thoughtful, that is the sweetest. I get to spend time with both of the momma’s too, I think I need it after the stress of someone” I chuckled “I wonder who that is” I sniggered “also I may just tell them about the gender, it’s just silly now because you ruined that part. And then Rajad will end up letting it slip so yeah, I will just tell them, or we both can later?” nodding my head “yeah for sure we can, I am so sorry about that” I feel bad that I did it “I am so excited about it, I am really you know, I didn’t mean it in a bad way” Robyn sighed out “I know, this is why I am not that mad” she is the cutest.

Placing my arm around my nephew, he is loving it being at the house “how has school been anyways? You are being good there, you know my sister will tell me if you ain’t” the home is actually so much calmer without the women here, they are always causing some type of drama over nothing “I am being good, people want to be my friend now. I told mom because they didn’t want to talk to me, but they are now, mom said they are fake. Everyone is asking me to get an autograph form Rihanna and I said no and then the boy called me a fake nigga for it, and I can’t be your nephew” frowning “Desean don’t let nobody tell you different, fuck them. They are jealous because us as a family are ok, they are haters, and you remember that. Those people that want to be friends you now and didn’t before are fake, don’t let that shit happen to you. You know I got you when you want to talk” kids are nasty as hell “I know I am just concentrating on Football and keeping myself lowkey, it doesn’t really upset me because I am winning. Rihanna is amazing” I breathed out laughing “she is” I agreed with my nephew.

The ladies came back looking refreshed, we just finished eating, I bought the boys pizza. Robyn is glowing even more “you good?” Robyn placed her hand on my shoulder and leaned down “I want a word with you” I frowned instantly, what did I do “come, we will be back” Robyn walked off, what the hell even happen “Chris, thank you so much for that. I feel so refreshed” getting up from the chair nodding my head “it’s ok” following Robyn, I am raking my brain just thinking what have I done. We just went into the corner “I seen your little video on IG, why react Chris that is what he wants, and they want” I shrugged not caring “you just want me to accept it, I will knock his ass out again. I don’t care, laughing that I cried. I am just saying that what is wrong with me crying? Because I appreciate what you have done for me, he is a pussy ass nigga!” I spat “and I just think, I am not saying what you said is wrong but don’t let him or anyone get to you, ok? So what if you cried, you appreciate me” I sighed out “I do, but if he wants to start then we can you know” I shrugged, I don’t even care who says what but it’s him that I hate.

Seeing as I ruined the secret between her family, Robyn feels like she has to say it because it’s pretty much only her mother that doesn’t know in her side so we might as well say it “we have a little announcement, well I do anyways because Chris has a big mouth” placing my arm around Robyn laughing, I can’t even front it is my fault “you already married so what next? Twins?” My dad jokes “how you know?” I said “really!?” my dad spat “see, I got you there but yeah. Robyn got this because I been just ruining her little thing” I am going to let Robyn say her thing “yeah, I am not angry at him but I feel it is unfair, but can we just keep it in this room for now, if we can try. We all are a gossips aren’t we but yeah, so we. Chris and I, we found out the gender together” Robyn lied, I put my head down because I know I didn’t, I wasn’t there “and it’s very exciting because honestly I am over the moon, so is Chris with his big mouth. We are having a baby girl!” Robyn yelped out “granddaughter!?” my dad shouted, all my dad is doing is shouting shit “yes dad” I laughed, my dad shot up smiling “I am so happy for you, oh my god!” my dad is excited as hell “awww mom don’t cry” Robyn said, the family is so emotional.

[obx-snippets]

Chapter 1 ∫ ≈ Rush Hour and New Friends

Summary: Reina finds herself flustered on her first day of work. And the Pogues make quite the first impression on her when she has to take their order.

Warning: light cursing? That’s about it....

Word count: 3.5k

Pairing: JJ Maybank x female!oc

Masterlist

a/n: I probably should have mentioned this in the beginning but this series is a...

SUPER  S L O W   B U R N.  

So enjoy! Feel free to ask to be tagged!

Reina's limbs were growing weak at the speed she was going down the lengthy sidewalk along an empty road. To her dismay, every corner of the island seems to be next to a beach, and the only sound that was able to come at par with the wind muffling her ears was the beating waves. She regretted not bringing her cassette with her; the music would have gone nicely with the Kildare county atmosphere. It might have also helped with her rapid heartbeat, wishing the ocean would just disappear. Nature sprouted from every corner, various people making their way down the opposite sidewalk to shop at different vendors. They seemed relaxed for the most part, but then again, many of them worked for their share, and the mask they wore wasn't fooling Reina. She wore the same one all too often.

Too deep in thought, she nearly missed the sign that read 'the Wreck' and came to a skidding stop, her body slightly jolting forward as she gripped her bike's handlebars. The wind from the ocean brought her hair to blow in her face as she dipped her eyes down to her phone, her GPS reading arrived.

After finding a comfortable place to park her bike, she made her way up a wooden ramp to enter the restaurant's threshold. The closer she got, the slower her pace as she heard a mix of rowdiness coming from inside. It was just her luck that the Wreck was extremely busy and evidently short on staff. Reina heaved around a few people who were waiting in line to be seated. Customers were grumbling among themselves, complaining about how the food had better be the best they've ever tasted if they had to wait that long. It was breakfast hour, and that was when people were the crankiest.

She blew air from her mouth once she made it to the front desk, a few customers muttering how she cut. Smoke from the kitchen just in front of her filled her nostrils, and her eyes brightened with delight. Only two men were hard at work, one with his belly hanging out from his stained white shirt while another tall man with tanned amber skin cutting fruit relentlessly. And with skill.

Reina was enthralled in the dynamic that she hadn't noticed how far she was leaning over the counter to watch everything they were doing. The taller man briefly looked over his shoulder before noticing the ripped paper wedged between her knuckles.

"Hey!" the man called over the spiel going around the crowded restaurant and the clinking of pot being moved about, continuing his cutting on a pineapple. Reina snapped her attention to the man, slightly embarrassed that she had been staring so long. "You Chris and Mina's kid?"

Reina shrugged, "Well technically, stepdaughter but uh--same thing yeah, that's me." she skipped the specifics of it all, not wanting to cause the man's forehead to crease more than it already was. "I uh--I came for the interview..." she looked down at the paper, about to ask about the cooking job when he suddenly advanced toward her.

"You a good cook?" he questioned sternly, almost hopeful. His eyes were desperate, sweat already trickling down his forehead.

"Absolutely," her confident answer came out almost immediately, making the man smile. She would cook all day if it meant not facing the water that was just a few hundred feet away from her. Even over the uproar in the open restaurant, she could still hear the waves taunting her like a dark, menacing laugh.

A toothpick twisting between his lips, he tapped his fingers harshly against the counter, contemplating if he should let a new teenager take part in his kitchen. "Fuck it, get in, kid." he pointed to the other side of the counter for her to enter. He didn't miss the ever-growing smile touching her lips as she hustled around the counter, already pulling her hair into the messiest low bun before washing her hands thoroughly. "Start cracking them eggs and beat 'em'. We got an order waiting at table five."

Reina's whole demeanor changed. She was locked in and moving like a ballerina, careful not to bump into anyone as she veered about to collect seasoning for the eggs. The tall man, which she learned went by the name of Mr. Carrera, watched her intently. All he had to do was tell her the recipe once, and she was already whipping everything up by memory. So much so that she served the waited tables in under an hour. It seemed the frequent customers took notice of the new girl as well; her sweet smile was inviting like she had been doing this her whole life. Reina was known to be more easy-going around adults compared to kids her age. She was the life of the party back in Cali, extremely outgoing and adrenaline-driven. But since the incident, she felt more comfortable being in her own reserved shell.

Mr. Carrera wasn't the only one noticing the girl's natural skill in the kitchen. Kiara Carrera led the way into her father's restaurant, her fellow pogues trailing behind like hungry puppies. Harlow Westwick struggled to keep up as they hadn't waited for her to tie her shoelaces, and she nearly tripped forward before finding her balance again.

"Woof," John B furrowed his brows, sidestepping around a woman as he took in the scene around him, "busy in here today, huh?"

The kids maneuvered their way through the packed dining area, all of their eyes searching for an empty table.

"Hell yeah, it is," Kie responded, her eyebrows stitching together as she caught sight of an unfamiliar raven haired girl in the kitchen.

She knew her dad had set up an interview with someone the other day, but he was never the one to hire and put to work the same day. Her father was very strict about who came in and out of his kitchen and how it was run.

"Found one!" JJ called, running across the floor to get to it before someone else could. He plopped down on a chair, running his ring clad fingers through his blonde locks before placing his red cap backward on his head. Harlow pulled the seat out next to him, flicking his red hat from behind, bringing the boy to quickly catch it before it hit the table.

Kie followed them wordlessly, her eyes still locked on the new cook in the kitchen as curiosity tickled her brain. "Do ya'll know who that is?"

The three boys and Harlow turned to look, all of them shaking their heads in response, a chorus of 'no's' or 'uh huh's' here and there.

Kie pursed her lips, her slender fingers tapping at the wooden chair before she signaled to the guys that she'd be back in a minute and moved towards the kitchen. The girl in question had swiveled around one of the older cooks, trading spots with him as she grabbed a pair of plates off the counter.

"'Scuse me," she smiled with a bow of her head, moving past Kie to put the plates down at one of the tables.

She turned around quickly, wiping a bead of sweat off her forehead with a rag before throwing it back over her shoulder.

"What's your name?" Kie questioned, crossing her arms over her orange halter top.

"Uh, Reina," the girl responded, a little confused by the random girl's straightforward inquiry before hurrying back to the kitchen, not giving Kie a chance to say anything else.

Just as the mystery girl - Reina, disappeared back into the kitchen, her father rounded the corner, giving her a nod to assure that he knew her and her friends were there, and they would get their food as quickly as they could get it out. Kie gave him a small smile in return and went back to her table, not before grabbing a stack of paper cups and a jug of water.

"You find out who the new girl is, Kie?" JJ asked, swiping a fry off an empty table.

"Just that her name's Reina," Kiara shrugged, offering the guys a cup and some water.

John B craned his neck to try and spot the dark-haired girl in the kitchen. "I haven't seen her around before," he pointed out.

"You think she's a kook?" Harlow questions, more so to herself as she noticed the seemingly expensive top.

"Maybe she's new," Pope chimes in his suggestion, his eyes fixated on how quickly she moved about the kitchen like muscle memory.

"Who moves to the Outer Banks?" JJ questioned around a mouthful of fries.

"Ew, gross," Kie muttered as her face scrunched up and finally took a seat next to Pope.

The Pogues chattered amongst themselves as customers were in and out of the restaurant. They were so used to sitting there for hours on end that they hadn't realized a difference in the food until it was displayed in front of them.

JJ was the first to mindlessly get a forkful of food into his mouth, suddenly moaning at the taste, pointing aggressively at his plate,

"This is fucking bomb, dog," he mumbled.

Upon seeing the other boy's reaction to the food, Kiara picked up a few eggs off of her plate and stuffed them into her mouth, "Holy shit," her eyes widened, knowing for a fact that this was not her father's cooking. "this is really good."

"Whoever made these needs to cook everything on the menu," Pope chuckled, diving into his fluffy pancakes lovingly.

Harlow was munching happily on her toast, her light brown hair that had recently been dyed two shades lighter at the tips was pulled back into a ponytail. She didn't bother making any comment, too entranced with the powdered sugar that she gladly licked off her fingers before wiping them off on a napkin.

John B peeped up from his plate, his chewing slowing down when he saw how white powder coated Harlow's pink lips. He rolled his eyes, grabbing a napkin and nearly scaring the girl to death when he wipes her lips with his thumb. "Much obliged, JB," Harlow chimed once he finished.

Reina had just finished washing her hands of the sticky juices of fruit when she noticed the group of kids hadn't been served their drinks. It seemed the Wreck was even short on servers. She huffed to herself, already dreading having to interact with them. She wiped her forehead with the back of her hand before grabbing a paper and pencil that sat on the counter to get their drink order.

"Hey, sorry for the delay on the drinks," Reina apologized when she made it to the table. She grew uncomfortable by how all their eyes bore into her own, and she dropped her attention to the notepad in her hand. "what can I start you off with?"

"I'll take a Sprite, please!" Pope exclaimed, instantly taking notice of the group's surprise in his response.

"Okay," Reina responded, quickly writing down his drink order in her notepad, "for you?"

"I'll take a raspberry ice tea," replied JJ, earning groans from the rest of the table, "with four pumps of the syrup, and only fill the glass halfway with ice so I can stir in my sugar-"

"Oh my gooooood!" groaned Harlow, "why are you so weird, JJ?"

JJ makes a face, "How am I weird? She's asking for my order!"

"Yeah, your drink order, not the secret recipe for a heart attack!"

"You know, what?-"

"What?-"

"Well, maybe if you let me finish my sentence-"

It wasn't long before the entire table erupted in a full-blown argument. Reina stood at the end of their table, brows furrowed, mouth parted. What the fuck..

Her eyes glanced around the packed dining room, her fingers twitching around her pencil. The place was still crowded, and the kitchen seemed to be going up in flames.

"I hate to interrupt, but does anybody else want anything to drink?" Reina spoke over the shouts.

The table quieted immediately, seemingly having forgotten about the girl waiting to take their order. The teens passed around embarrassed looks before the girl who'd come up to Reina earlier spoke.

"Pepsi's are fine."

Reina pursed her lips and gave her a nod before shoving her notepad and pen back into her apron and hurrying away from their table.

"Nice going," Kie snapped, throwing a rolled-up napkin at JJ.

                                                •≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈•

As the day carried by, the restaurant's capacity was waning down to only a few customers an hour. Reina hadn't expected the day to be so eventful. Some adults and teens discerned that she was new to the island and welcomed her before paying her a generous tip. Mr. Carrera was already falling in love with the new girl's cooking and didn't bother telling her she got the job; it was already guaranteed. He told her to have the day to herself tomorrow, and she could come work every other day. Reina would prefer to keep herself busy in the kitchen instead of being forced to explore the island, but she obliged nonetheless.

The seven pm sun was warming Reina's skin as she walked alongside her bike. She decided to take her time heading home, hoping her surprisingly laid back step-parents would say it's too late for her to go to the party at the beach. The sound of the waves crashing onto the shore was enough for her jaw to clench, wishing to drown out the sound. For a moment, the wind picked up around her loose hair, and she instinctively let her fingers ghost over the scars on her neck, flashing her back to that night.

•

"Reina, just jump, bro!"

The California moon was set on full display as the stars were barely distinguishable from the colorful, luminescent lights blinding the party at a rich kids' beach house. After Reina's friends informed her of a party being held in the Hamptons, she couldn't refuse. Not when the boy throwing the party was loaded with cash. School was nearly over, and one last party would surely end the year with a bang.

After a few heavy drinks and five shots, Reina found her unbalanced body standing on the highest point of the house's roof. The cold California night air brushed against her skin, but the warmth from her drunken state didn't let goosebumps make an appearance. Her hair was tousled behind her; space buns atop her head, keeping strands from invading her vision. Her black eyeliner was smudged from the excessive wave of laughter that overcame her a couple of hours before, and her chapstick was secured in her back pocket of her shorts in case of a possible make-out session.

"You think I'll make it?" Reina's crazed question was muffled out over the shouting and cheers coaxing her to jump into the vast pool below, and she let one of her bare feet dangle off the edge.

Her brown eyes caught sight of her sweet friend Vanessa, who was acting as a chaperone for the night, glaring up at her through the rims of her blue glasses. "If you're actually asking for a probability, you're insane!" Vanessa yelled.

"C'mon Nessa!" a brunette boy, Dimitri, came tumbling toward the red-headed girl draping his wet arm over her shoulder. His bare upper body smelled of herb and chlorine as his brown hair was swiped back from the pool. "Quit being a killjoy. The jump isn't even that high."

"It's not the jump I'm worried about, ass wipe." Vanessa growled, shoving the boy away from her, "Do you not see how drunk she is? If she even tried to jump, she'll land face-first on the cement."

Even beyond the overpour of music blasting through her ears, Reina heard Vanessa and saw it as a challenge. "Prepare for landing, ladies, and gentlemen!" Reina warned with a playful salute, loud enough for the crowd of teens below to roar out an applaud, making a clear opening for her in the pool.

"Rae, no! Stop!" Vanessa tried lunging for the house, but Dimitri pulled her back by her arm. "I swear to--"

It was too late. Reina opened her arms wide and let gravity take its toll once she leaped from the edge of the roof. She tucked her body into a ball just when she made contact with the water. The music invaded her eardrums, and the white noise muted all the applause from her life-threatening jump.

A wide grin set on full display on her lips brought ease to Vanessa, knowing she wasn't hurt, and she decided to retire into the house, too angry to say another word to her reckless friend. Reina's buns came undone, and her raven hair was dripping down her shoulder as she swiveled around people to exit the pool.

The crisp air made itself known as it nipped on her skin, but it vanished as soon as Dimitri came crashing toward her. Her black bikini top nearly shifted out of place from the boy's abrupt intrusion, but as this was his party, she would let him do whatever. As long as she could find his wallet in the depth of his pool trunks, she was good to go.

Dimitri separated from her and gripped her by the shoulders. "Badass Reina. Fucking hot," he breathed out sporting a smirk, his breath laced with weed.

Reina shrugged innocently, "The roofs not even that high off the ground. It's nothing."

Dimitri rolled his eyes before trailing his hands down her soaked waist and pulled her close enough for his lips to graze over the shell of her ear. "Wanna do a line? I got some of my buddies sellin' here tonight. My treat?"

Reina bit down on her lips, her audacious nature taking root once again. "Bet you can't last more than two lines," she mumbled with natural confidence. Dimitri lifted a brow and nodded leisurely, taking hold of her small hand, lacing it with his own.

"You're on, Bayard."

•

The honking of an obnoxious horn penetrated her thoughts, and Reina whipped her head around to see a VW van slowing down until it made a complete stop.

She was surprised to see the boy from early in the driver's seat with his arm draped out the window. His unruly brown curls sat atop his head, almost looking like a surfer and frat boy at the same time. His sun-kissed skin was radiant under the North Carolina sun, and she realized how handsome the boy really was.

"Hi again," the boy greeted with a casual wave of his hand that was gripping the steering wheel. Reina flashed a tight-lipped smile, nodding in response. She had only realized the girl from earlier on the passenger seat when she poked her head out from over his shoulder.

"Reina yeah?" the girl asked, hopefulness in her tone that she got the name right. Her mocha eyes were squinted from the bright sun behind Reina.

Reia nodded gradually, kicking the metal bar on her bike to let it park. "Yeah..." her tone came out as a question, puzzled that the random girl would make another appearance.

"I just wanted to tell you I'm sorry for how we acted today; you had enough on your plate and didn't need to deal with us acting like children."

Reina could hear commotion from the back seat due to the girl's tone directed to a friend of hers.

Reina's rigid shoulders relaxed at her words, taking a step closer to the beat-up van as she ran her hand down her arm. "Oh, no, it's okay. I've dealt with worse," she replied dismissively.

"Still," the girl shrugged before a small smile appeared on her lips, "By the way, I'm Kiara, we'll be seeing a lot more of each other now that you're working at the Wreck."

"You work there too?" Reina asked.

"My dad owns the place." It suddenly made sense why the teenagers strutted in the restaurant like they owned the place.

Kiara's hand stuck outside of the window, waiting for Reina to shake it. She did so wearily, an awkward chuckle leaving her mouth.

"This is John B," the boy driving the van sent her a nod, "and in the back are, Pope, JJ, and Harlow." a mix of greetings was heard from the back.

Pope? Odd name.

"Hi," Reina replied softly. The interaction seems like a simple one, but a storm was brewing in Reina's head.

"We're throwing a party down at the Boneyard - you know where that is?" John B asked, toying with the bandana around his wrist.  

Reina pondered for a moment, "Is it that party at the beach I heard about?"

"Kegger!" a male voice corrected her from the back seat, earning an eye roll from Kiara.

"Right yeah, that. Shouldn't be hard to find."

"Great!" Kiara beamed, a bright smile on her face, "you should come! It's gonna be fun!"

Reina parted her lips slightly, not expecting the invitation. "You really don't have to invite me--"

"No, no, seriously. If you're the one who cooked that killer food back at the Wreck, a drink is well deserved." John B licked his lips, waiting for her to respond to his attempt.

Reina wanted to decline almost immediately. But Chris' demand came jogging back to memory. "Make friends!"

"Uh, yeah, okay," Reina nodded nonchalantly as if her brain wasn't exploding at the idea of being so close to the water, "sure."  

Her mind wandered the rest of the walk home, thinking up every horrble possibility. When Reina arrived home, she pulled out her cassete from one of her boxes she was yet to unpack and fell on her bed. Her eyes drifted closed, as she tucked the plastic ear buds in her ear and hummed along to work all day

@pogueszn​ @mdlyncline​ @cordeliascrown​ @acvross-the-universe​ @bricksatanakinswindow​

[musette22]

Title: Honey, I’m Home

Pairing: Chris Evans x Sebastian Stan (M/M)

Rating: E (18+)

Word count: 4.3k

Summary: After two long months, Chris comes back from filming Red Sea Diving Resort in South Africa. Sebastian is waiting for him at home.

A/N: Soooo, a week or so ago we were blessed with those images of Chris looking solid and hot af in the trailer for Red Sea Diving Resort. @rainbowsandcoconut I got a little thirsty discussing how Chris and Seb’s reunion might have played out when he came back from South Africa, and then I was feeling inspired and bam, next thing you know you have another smutty fic. It’s pure PWP, tbh. Hope you guys don’t mind 😉

Warnings: explicit smut, light Dom/sub, dirty talk, slight degradation kink. It’s all in good fun though, folks.

Honey, I’m Home

Sebastian is feeling jittery; nervous and excited low-key aroused all at once, has been from the moment he opened his eyes that morning. Chris is coming home today. After two long months (two and a half, almost) he’s finally seeing his man in the flesh again, instead of through a screen. Don’t get him wrong; he’s grateful facetime exists, so fucking grateful, but it’s hardly the same as feeling Chris’s skin against his, as breathing in his scent, feeling his heartbeat, steady and comforting, against his chest. 

Nor, incidentally, is it the same as getting to suck his perfect dick, which is one of the things, along with getting railed so hard he forgets his own name, he’s had a… hard time going without these past few months.

So yeah, it’s safe to say Sebastian is excited.

He’d wanted to pick Chris up at the airport, too impatient to wait the extra hour it would take for him to make it home from LAX, but since they haven’t gone public as a couple yet, in the end that seemed like a bad idea. So instead, he’s been cooped up at home all day, making sure Chris’s house, to which he has a key, is clean and tidy. He even cooked (or, attempted to cook; he’s never been very culinarily inclined) Chris’s favorite dish, and then spent a good two hours on personal grooming so that he would look and feel his absolute best when his man finally did make it home.

When, at long last, he hears the keys in the front door, his heart starts beating faster, anticipation sending adrenaline coursing through his system. He feels keyed up, ready to pounce as soon as Chris sets foot in the room – and yet, the second the door to the living room opens and Sebastian lays eyes on Chris for the first time in almost three months, his breath catches in his throat and he freezes on the spot, unable to move a muscle.

Chris looks incredible.

The first thing that Sebastian’s eyes are drawn to is Chris’s hair, longer than usual, and lighter too. The sun-kissed strands frame his tanned face, bringing out the strong cut of his jawline, covered, as always, in that goddamn thick beard of his that makes Sebastian crave beard burn in all kinds of inappropriate places. He’s admired it before, of course, through the screen of his phone, but that was nothing compared to the impact this look has in the flesh.

And Chris’s eyes… those gorgeous, blue-green eyes are fixed on him intently, the heated look in them seeming to burn right through the carefully selected layers of clothes Sebastian is wearing. It makes him feel exposed; vulnerable, and so completely, unbearably turned on from one moment to the next that he has to bite his lip to stop from whimpering out loud.

Wordlessly, Chris drops the bag he was still shouldering, takes one, two steps in Sebastian’s direction, eyes firmly fixed on his. When he’s only a few feet away Sebastian realizes, with a sudden, ton-of-bricks kind of impact, why Chris’s presence is hitting him so hard, harder even than he anticipated.

Chris is solid.

Since the last time Sebastian has seen him, he has definitely filled out. But while it looks like he must’ve really enjoyed the local cuisine, he clearly also kept up with his workout routine. Like, really kept up. Mainly heavy lifting, if the way the muscles of his biceps and chest shift under his tight, dark grey t-shirt are anything to go by. Chris has never been a small guy, of course – hell, his incredible physique is one of the things he’s best known for – but where he used to strive for aesthetic form, for perfect definition that made him look like a young, Greek god, now, it’s all power.

He exudes strength, moves like a lion on the prowl, determined and compelling, and Sebastian can’t take his eyes off him.

For a giddy moment, he wonders if Chris could actually bench press him, but then Chris closes the final few feet of distance separating them and they’re face to face and Seb stops thinking altogether. It’s impossible, but Chris seems taller, somehow, like he’s towering over Sebastian, rooting him to the spot just with his gaze and the heat that radiates from his body.

“Hi, baby,” Chris says, his voice deep and dark, and Sebastian feels the vibrations of it all the way down to his core. It makes him shiver. Even that slightest of movements doesn’t escape Chris’s notice, makes that look in his eyes turn that bit more intense as his gaze drops to Sebastian’s mouth, then back up to his eyes again. When Chris lifts a big hand to the side of Sebastian’s face, sliding it into his hair and caressing his cheek with his thumb, Sebastian leans into the touch, sways forward into Chris and presses himself to his front.

God, he’s like a brick wall. Chris doesn’t even budge, even though Seb is pretty much leaning his full weight on him. Sebastian slides his hands up Chris’s abs, less defined now than they were once but all the more robust for it. It’s making something primal inside of Seb want to feel Chris’s solid weight on top of him, holding him down, making sure he stays exactly where Chris wants him.

Chris hums and leans closer, noses at Sebastian’s hair, at his cheek, his neck. It’s almost like he’s sniffing at him, and for a weird and wonderful moment, Seb imagines that Chris is trying to determine if Sebastian’s been good, hasn’t stepped out on him while he was away. He hasn’t, of course, would never – but the thought of Chris wondering, of him feeling jealous, possessive, sets Seb’s skin ablaze, turns his blood to molten lava under his skin.

He tilts his head, baring his neck for Chris’s inspection, and Chris presses his lips to his pulse point. They’re lush as always, soft against his skin, which makes it all the more shocking when he suddenly bites down, sharp and quick. Sebastian’s hands shoot up to Chris’s biceps and he cries out, softly, more from surprise than actual pain – especially since Chris immediately soothes the sting with his tongue, laving over the tender spot until Sebastian can’t hold back the whine that rises up in his throat. Already, he can feel his cock start to chub up inside his jeans, hips stuttering forward of their own accord as he presses his crotch against Chris’s muscled thigh. 

Chris’s left hand grips Seb’s hip, fingers digging into his flesh almost painfully, and then finally, finally, his lips drag over Sebastian’s jawline, slow and sure, until they find his.

The kiss is immediately passionate, deep and needy from the get-go, Chris’s tongue plunging into his mouth while his fingers press into his skull, tugging at his roots. A growling sound escapes Chris as he wraps his left arm around Sebastian’s torso, pulling him to closer, making Seb turn to putty in his hands. He can’t think with Chris pressed against him, all around him, his hands, his mouth, his scent, all working together to overwhelm him.

Slowly, Chris walks them backwards, keeping a firm grip on Sebastian so that he doesn’t stumble, until the backs of his thighs hit something hard and unyielding. The kitchen table. The solid contact makes Sebastian’s mind clear a little, allowing him to pull back, breaking the kiss.

“Chris,” he pants, already breathless with it, peppering kisses to his lips in between words. “Chris, I missed you. Missed you so much, god.”

“Yeah?” Chris stands tall and forbidding, simply lets Sebastian shower him in kisses without making any effort to reciprocate. “And what did you miss most, hmm?” he queries, tilting back his head to look down on Seb. “Was it my company? My conversation?”

He holds Sebastian’s gaze, eyes boring into his. “Or,” he goes on, his voice dropping even lower, “did you miss this?”

Reaching down, he grabs Sebastian’s hand and presses it against his crotch, rubbing his palm firmly along the line of his dick, already hard and heavy inside his pants.

Sebastian whimpers, eyes falling closed. “Fuck,” he breathes.

“Go on,” Chris coaxes, rolling his hips into Sebastian’s hand. “Tell me I’m wrong.”

When Sebastian just squirms, trying to push himself closer, a slow smirk spreads over Chris’s face. “But you can’t, can you?” he drawls. “You miss my cock, pretty baby? Tell me, did you play with yourself while I was away? Used your fingers and your toys, pretend it was me?”

Sebastian moans because yes, yes, that was exactly what he’d done.

Chris hums, nods his head in agreement. “Wasn’t the same though, was it, sweetheart? Not quite like the real thing. Couldn’t quite hit the spot like I can.”

Letting go of Sebastian’s hand, Chris deftly flicks open the button on Seb’s pants and pulls down the zipper, before unceremoniously shoving his hands down the back of his jeans. Sebastian, who figured their reunion would go something like this, isn’t wearing any underwear, and Chris groans as soon as he realizes. He grabs Sebastian’s ass cheeks with both hands, kneading them roughly, possessively, before pulling them apart. When he rubs the pad of his thumb over the tight pucker of Seb’s asshole, Seb stutters out a shaky breath, pushing his ass back into Chris’s firm grip, his warm, calloused hands.

“Please,” Sebastian says, imploring. “Please, Chris, I need–”

“What?” Chris demands. “What do you need, Sebastian? Tell me.”

Sebastian has no choice but to obey. “Fuck me,” he chokes out, a little desperate, too wound up to even try at playing it cool. “Just fuck me, Chris, please. Need to feel you inside me, it’s been so fucking long.”

He pushes his face into the crook of Chris’s neck, breathing in his scent – a little musky, a hint of sweat from travelling mixed with what’s left of his cologne, and god, has he missed that smell. Missed it all day, every day, but especially when he was in bed at night, imagining traces of Chris’s scent still lingered on his sheets.

The next moment, Sebastian yelps as Chris spins him around without warning, a hand on the back of his neck pushing him down, bending him down over the kitchen table. He gasps when his cheek presses against the hardwood of the tabletop, and all his blood rushes south in an instant, his dick suddenly so hard it hurts. Fuck.

“Stay there,” Chris orders, giving the back of Seb’s neck a little shake before releasing him.

Sebastian does as he’s told, hands gripping at the table’s edge as he watches Chris walk into his line of sight, towards the kitchen counter. Chris pulls open the third drawer from the top, rummages around for a second before straightening and turning back to Seb. In his hand is the bottle of lube he’d put there the last time they had sex in the kitchen, two nights before Chris left for South Africa.

“Well, well,” Chris says, his voice halfway between amused and a little menacing, causing shivers of anticipation to run down Sebastian’s spine. "And why is this still here, Sebastian?”

When Seb doesn’t reply, just bites his lip as he gazes up at him, Chris steps closer. “What?” he asks. “You just wanna make sure you had it handy for whoever came through that door? Is that how needy you are, Sebastian?” Chris cocks his head at him. “You couldn't even wait for me to come home and fuck you? Had to get what you needed from other people, did you?”

Seb opens his mouth to reply, but Chris shushes him, walking back around to stand behind him again and dropping the lube to the table. Hands tug at Sebastian’s waistband, and then Chris roughly pulls down his jeans to halfway down his thighs, exposing his ass. Without preamble, Chris spreads apart his cheeks, his thumb rubbing maddening little circles over his hole, teasing, making Seb want, before he finally pushes the tip inside. It slides in easily, even without lube – courtesy of Sebastian taking the liberty of preparing himself just a little bit, before Chris arrived.

“Would you look at that,” Chris murmurs, pushing his thumb in deeper. “Still loose from the last one, I bet. Such a needy little hole, ready to be filled by anyone, huh? Don’t care who it is, as long as you get a cock in you.”

Sebastian shakes his head frantically, pleads, “No, no, Chris, it’s just you, only you I promise,” but Chris silences him with a sharp smack to his ass. The sting of it takes Sebastian by surprise and he cries out, rocking forward, trying to get a little friction on his dick from pressing against the table’s edge.

“See, I don’t think I believe you,” Chris continues, almost taunting. “Pretty little slut like you needs it at least twice a day, isn't that right? Needs to be fucked good and proper on the regular or he can’t think straight.” He spanks Sebastian again, on the other cheek this time, and Seb can feel the heat of it, the blood rushing to the surface at the impact.

“Please, Chris, please.”

“Look at you,” Chris breathes, awed despite himself. “You need it so bad, don’t you? Pushing your ass out at me, begging me to fuck you. You’re like a bitch in heat, Sebastian.”

Shit. Chris’s words make Sebastian whine, high in his throat.

They don’t often do this, don’t always take it quite so far with the name calling, but when the mood strikes them, it sometimes just works. From the moment Chris had set foot through that door, Sebastian knew what kind of night it was going to be and he is there for it. He knows that everything Chris says is just for play, only intended to get them both hot and turned on. There is no malicious intent, no genuine distrust or jealousy, but just the suggestion of it is enough to make Sebastian so fucking hard, makes him feel dirty in a good kind of way when Chris calls him out on just how much Sebastian needs a good dicking.

And besides, it’s true. He needs it so bad sometimes it’s all he can think about. It’s a good thing Chris always knows how to give him exactly what he needs, or he wouldn’t know what to do with himself. Then again, he’s pretty sure the reason he needs it so bad is because Chris always gives him what he needs. He’s been spoiled for everyone else, and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Well?” Chris prompts, pressing his still clothed erection against Sebastian’s bare ass, fingers digging into either side of his hips. “Do you need it, or don’t you?”

Sebastian’s response is instinctive, immediate. “Yes,” he begs, “yeah, I need it, need your cock, Chris. Please, just – just put it in me.” 

Chris shrugs. “Alright, then,” he says, followed by the tell-tale sound of his zipper, the rustle of fabric as he pushes down his pants far enough to take out his cock. “Wouldn’t want to deny my baby boy what he needs.”

A moment later, two big, slicked up fingers probe at Seb’s hole, pushing in unceremoniously. Sebastian gasps as Chris twists his fingers, pushing in deep and rubbing him on the inside. It feels almost clinical, almost as if he’s just determining whether he’s loose enough, and somehow, that only adds to the thrill. When a third finger is pushed in alongside the other two, Sebastian hisses. It stings, but it’s exactly the kind of sting he likes, and he needs more of it. He doesn’t want Chris to go easy on him tonight, he needs to really feel it.

“Fucking come on, Chris. Just give it to me, already,” he says, demanding, earning himself another spank for his back talking.

“I’ll give it to you when I’m good and ready,” Chris chastises him, but he’s already pulling out his fingers, lining up his cock and then pushing into him, hard and unyielding, burying himself balls-deep inside of Seb in one, long stroke.

Unbidden, Sebastian lets out a string of expletives, moaning loud and wanton, the burn intensifying as his hole is stretched around Chris’s considerable girth. Chris spanks him again, then leans forward and brings a hand to his face, shoving a few of his fingers into Sebastian’s mouth, effectively shutting him up.

“You always run your mouth like that?” he demands, knowing full well Seb can’t respond. “You know, I can think of a better use of that pretty mouth, baby. But since my cock’s already in your tight little ass right now, you’re just going to have to make do with these.”

Sebastian moans around Chris’s fingers, tonguing them, sucking hard and fervently wishing it was Chris’s dick instead. When Chris starts thrusting, hard and deep and merciless, Seb’s mouth falls open in a broken-off moan, fingers falling from his mouth. Chris pulls back his hand, straightening up and grabbing Seb’s hips again instead, holding him steady as he starts to pound into him. Sebastian pushes himself up onto his elbows on the table top, planting his feet more firmly on the ground so that he has a little more leverage against Chris’s full-body assault and pushes back against him, desperate to feel him deeper.

Immediately, Chris pushes him back down with a hand between his shoulder blades, the warmth of his palm burning through Seb’s thin shirt. He’s ungentle about it, holding him down forcefully, and Sebastian pushes back, struggling just enough to see how Chris will react. Under his breath, Chris calls him a brat before he shoves him down again, even more roughly this time, really bearing his weight down on him as his hips keep snapping forward. Sebastian hears himself make an embarrassing, involuntary sound in the back of his throat, but god, he fucking loves the feeling of not being able to move unless Chris lets him. Loves knowing that Chris is capable of holding him down easily, making him take it like he’s doing right now.

Chris rucks up Sebastian’s t-shirt, bunching it up under his armpits to expose his bare back. For a moment, Seb gets to revel in the cooler air that hits his overheated skin, and then Chris firmly runs both his hands up and down his back, from his shoulder blades all the way down to the swell of his ass. He digs his fingers in, giving the firm flesh a squeeze before pulling his cheeks apart as he keeps on fucking into him, setting a punishing rhythm. By now, the burn has given way to that feeling of fullness that Sebastian craves so much, and for the first time in months, he feels like he’s whole again, like his missing piece has been slotted back into place and everything is going to be alright. Chris will take care of him, will always have his back – quite literally, in this case.

Nevertheless, Sebastian wouldn’t be Sebastian if he didn’t try to push for more. Chris would expect nothing less from him.

“Harder,” he pants. “C’mon, give it to me harder.” Just like he expected, Chris spanks him again for his impertinence, and despite the fact that his ass is on fire, Seb is elated.

“Please,” he tries, entreating now. “Please, Chris.”

“God, you’re a greedy boy, aren’t you?” Chris growls, bending over him to whisper his next words directly into his ear. “Nothing’s ever enough for a dirty little whore like you.”

Sebastian moans, eyes rolling back into his skull, while Chris buries a hand in his hair and pulls. Automatically, Seb arches up, trying to alleviate the sting, but with Chris’s other hand firmly pushing down on his ass, still, there’s not much he can do. Then, Chris changes the angle of his thrusts just a little bit and suddenly Sebastian is seeing stars, white-hot bursts of pleasure radiating out from his loins through his entire body.

He shouts, and when Chris punches forward and nails Sebastian’s prostate once again, Seb realizes he’s done for. Chris is like a pitbull when he gets like this; when he sets his sights on something, relentlessly pursuing his goal and not giving up until he gets what he wants. And what he wants right now, Sebastian knows, is for Seb to come untouched – just from Chris’s perfect dick in his ass, hitting the spot over and over again until he breaks. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does, it’s fucking special. Chris adores it, loves that he can make his baby boy come just by dicking him down so good. It’s a primal thing, Sebastian’s pretty sure.

Still, it’s intense, and when the pleasure that swells up inside him starts getting almost too much to bear, keeping him on the brink without the easy release brought about by a hand or a mouth, Sebastian needs to come so badly that he tries to snake a hand between his stomach and the table top, inching towards his own dick.

He should’ve known that Chris was never going to let him.

“I don’t think so, sweetheart,” Chris says in a rough voice, yanking Seb’s hand back up and grabbing his other one as well for good measure, keeping Sebastian’s wrists locked behind his back in one large hand of his own. The scratch of the fabric of Chris’s jeans against Seb’s bare ass, sore from the spanking he received, stings every time Chris thrusts into him – but really, the pain just serves to make the pleasure that much more intense, balancing him on the knife’s edge of just enough and too much.

Chris is really laying into him now, using all of that incredible, weight-honed core strength of his to fuck Sebastian the way he craves to be fucked, and Sebastian starts to whimper, needing to come so badly he can taste it in his mouth. He just needs that little bit more…

As if he can read his mind, Chris pushes a hand up Seb’s spine, skating over the back of his neck before sliding it around his throat, and, oh fuck.

Slowly, deliberately, Chris’s fingers tighten, pressing down lightly on his windpipe, and Sebastian keens. “More,” he rasps, and Chris obliges, pressing down harder, virtually cutting off Seb’s air supply while his thumb digs into his pulse point.

With a choked-off cry, Sebastian goes tense all over, mind whiting out from the combination of struggling for air and Chris slamming into his prostate relentlessly, and then he’s coming, coming so hard the world disappears around him, knowing nothing but the mind-blowing pleasure that consumes him, wave after wave of it as Chris fucks him through his orgasm, in pursuit of his own. It doesn’t take long, with Seb clenching around his dick like a vice, until Chris is groaning, burying himself inside Sebastian one last time before stilling, filling him up with his release.  

Even with his stamina, it takes Chris a little while to recover. In the silence that follows their climax, Sebastian can feel him pressed against his back, heart racing and breathing hard. Seb doesn’t mind – on the contrary. He can’t think of anywhere he’d rather be than draped over Chris’s kitchen table, with Chris inside and on top of him, his solid weight a comforting presence, assuring him that he’s really back, really here to stay – at least for a little while.

Chris stirs eventually, brings up a hand and buries it in Seb's hair again. Tugging lightly, he pulls his head around so he can kiss him over his shoulder. It's an inelegant angle, meaning they mostly end up licking into each other’s mouths without finesse, and Chris’s hair falls into his eyes, tickling the bridge of his nose. Sebastian’s not complaining though; he’s just so fucking glad to taste Chris again. He moans in relief as Chris scrapes his fingers gently over his scalp, massaging out the tenderness caused by the earlier hair pulling.

Chris finally pulls back, quickly reaching for a cloth on the side of the counter to wipe Sebastian clean. Once he’s helped Sebastian up, he spins him around in his arms, gazing down at him. There’s pure adoration on his features, and Seb lifts up a hand to Chris’s forehead to brush aside a strand of his hair, longer now than his own. It’s a strange sensation, but he kind of likes it.

“Welcome home, honey," Seb murmurs, still sounding a little dazed. They look at each other for a few moments – until Chris suddenly lets out a half-snort. There’s a beat of silence, and then Sebastian’s eyes widen, right before he dissolves into giggles. Within seconds, they’re both laughing so hard they collapse, half naked and filthy, on the kitchen floor together, all tangled up in each other. It’s ridiculous, and it’s the happiest, freest Sebastian can remember feeling in a long while.

When they’ve finally calmed down a bit, Chris sits up, resting his back against a table leg, with Sebastian curled up between his thighs. Seb leans into his wide, sturdy chest, and Chris wraps his arms around him, burying his nose in Seb’s hair, breathing in deeply.

“I missed you too, baby,” he says, belatedly, his voice warm and soft and loving now that they’ve gotten their basest instincts somewhat under control.

Seb smiles against Chris’s collarbone. “I kind of figured that.”

“Damn. What gave me away?” Chris asks, straight-faced, and Sebastian dissolve into giggles once more. 

Man, it’s good to be home.

[my-emotional-self]

Forever Ago Chapter 9

Pairings: Chris Evans x OFC

Warnings:  Angst, Swearing, Fluff

Summary: After losing touch with your childhood best friend after graduation, he comes crashing back into your life 15 years later. The feelings you’ve had for him never left you.  But do you forgive him for all those years he ignored you?  Or do you decide he lost his chance with you for good?

After opening up to Chris and letting him know how you had felt, to say you were relieved would have been an understatement.  It was like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders; years of heaviness suddenly gone as the words tumbled from your mouth.  

But there was something else you couldn’t quite believe; Chris had felt the same way about you. Once he told you about how he started gaining feelings for you right before your parents’ car accident, you didn’t know what to believe.  

You had cried, that was for sure.  Yet you didn’t know if they were tears of happiness, or sadness.  Because of that, you told Chris you needed some time to think about things as he was more than willing to jump straight into a relationship with you as he said his feelings for you never ceased.  The only problem was that you had spent years trying to forget him; wanting him out of your life for the way he ignored you for so long.  

Two days after your talk, you were sitting on the porch of your house; admiring the expanse greenery of the yard.  While you loved New York City and the busyness of it all, this would always be home to you.  But now you were ready to sell the home you lived in growing up; the home you shared with your parents; the home where you first met Chris.  

There was a slight wind as you curled a thick blanket around your body; your feet tucking up under you as you relaxed with your thoughts, trying to decide what to do about you and Chris.  On one hand, he had been your best friend since kindergarten and you knew most relationships that started out as friends first, were usually the ones to survive. But on the other hand, a few years after the two of you went to college, it was as if you didn’t exist in his life anymore.  No more phone calls, texts or emails; nothing.  It broke your heart and pulled you into a deep functioning depression that took years to break out of; you most certainly didn’t want to go down that road again.  

The soft hum of the bristling leaves made your body calm and relaxed, but thinking about everything made your head hurt.  In the distance you heard the sound of a barking dog.  At first it was quiet, far away, but the barking grew louder until you saw a dog run around the corner and straight to you.  It was a tan dog with white on its chest, belly and paws.  

“Well aren’t you just the cutest thing,” you cooed as you took the blanket from your arms so you could pet the dog.  

“Dodger!” the familiar voice of Chris broke through the quiet in the backyard.  Snapping your head up you saw Chris running around the corner and coming to a stop; relief flooding his face when he saw you with the dog.

“He’s yours?” you asked, brows furrowed.  

Chris was breathing deeply as he nodded his head.  He walked over to you and Dodger.  “He was with Scott out in Los Angeles.  They both arrived here late last night.  I was taking him for a walk and the little bugger got off his leash and zipped off like a damn racecar.”  

You couldn’t help but chuckle, wishing you had been able to witness it yourself.  Dodger laid his head on your lap, tongue hanging out as you happily scratched behind his ears.  “He’s adorable Chris,” you spoke honestly, leaning down to give Dodger a kiss on his forehead; his hair tickling your nose.  

“I got him while filming a movie.  We were shooting a scene in a shelter and when I realized that all the dogs were not actually actor dogs and were available for adoption, well, the second I saw him I knew I had to save him.”  Your heart melted listening to the story of how Chris met Dodger.  

Chris came over and sat down on the chair next to you, watching as your fingers disappeared into the thick fur of his dog.  Dodger’s fur was so soft and you couldn’t get enough of it.  You had always wanted a dog, but your dad was allergic to them and by the time you moved into your own place, there just wasn’t enough room for a dog to run around and be happy.  

Dodger seemed to have enough of your attention for the moment and trotted around the backyard aimlessly; his tail wagging happily.  Chris cleared his throat next to you, causing you to turn your head to face him.  It never ceased to amaze you how breathtakingly handsome he was, which made it harder to make your decision.  

“Not to sound like a stalker or anything,” Chris began to say, making you chuckle, “but I saw a large vehicle here yesterday.  It looked like they were dropping off pictures or something like that.”

You cast your gaze down at your hands as they fidgeted on your lap.  “Yeah, umm, they are my photography pictures.  I finally had them developed and framed and I wanted to see them as soon as possible so I had them delivered here.”

Chris knew you were a photographer, but he thought you just photographed celebrities for photoshoots and that was it.  “Can-can I see them?” he asked.

You looked at him, his eyes hopeful and you gave him a soft smile.  “Sure.”

The two of you, along with Dodger, walked into your house and you led him to the living room where all the prints were at.

His mouth parted at the sight before his eyes.  There in front of him, were large prints of the most beautiful photographs he had ever seen. There were pictures of flowers, of the ocean, a deserted road and of trees and forests and animals.  

You stared at Chris nervously, trying to gage his reaction.  “What-what do you think?” you asked hesitantly.  

His eyes continued to scan through the pictures before landing on you.  “Jessica they are breathtaking,” he spoke sincerely; a hand to his heart.  His reaction made your eyes water with affection as the man you had always truly loved, was admiring your greatest accomplishments.  “I had no idea you did this kind of photography.”

You felt your cheeks heat up at his admiration.  “It’s more of a hobby I guess,” you replied with a shrug.  

Chris turned to you and grasped your face gently in his hands.  “Jess this is not what I would consider a hobby.  These,” he gestured to the photographs, “are a work of art.  And the world deserves to see how talented you are.” Tears sprung to your eyes as Chris readily wiped them away with his thumbs.  

“Do you mean that?” you asked with a shaky voice; your chin quivering.

He smiled and nodded his head.  “These are without a doubt the best pictures I have ever seen.  I wouldn’t lie to you Jess.”

Your heart clenched at his words.  You knew for a fact he would never lie to you, but he still tossed you out of his life when his acting career began.  With a sigh, you decided it was time to talk about everything and lay it all out on the table.  

“Will you come over tonight so we can talk about everything?  I-I was going to cook some dinner and I think it’s about time we talk.”

Chris’s face showed guilt, obviously from what happened in the past, but he was more than willing to sit down and talk things through with you finally.  “I’d love to Jess.  What time?”

With a sniffle, you shrugged your shoulders.  “Around 7?”

He gave you a soft smile, nodding his head.  Leaning forwards he placed his lips to your forehead for a tender kiss.  “I’ll be here.”

~~~

Later that night you were busying yourself around the kitchen, getting ready for Chris to come over for dinner and talking.  You plated the steak and vegetables on the plates and placed them on the table in the kitchen just as the doorbell rang.  

Chris was standing at the door with a bouquet of flowers in hand and a bottle of wine in the other. A smile graced your lips as you took the flowers from him, inhaling the delicious scent.  “Their beautiful Chris, thank you.”  

Dinner was a quiet affair; the two of you too busy being hungry to do much talking.  Luckily the wine helped you relax as you were nervous for this big talk with Chris.  You clearly knew what he wanted, but you were still torn about what to do.  

Chris helped you clear off the table and clean up.  Afterwards you both grabbed your glasses and the bottle of wine and headed into the living room.  Sitting on the couch, you saw Chris admiring your photos yet again.  

“So,” Chris began, taking a sip of his wine, “you know what I would like out of this.  I want a relationship with you Jess.  I feel like I screwed this up back in high school when I didn’t pursue you.”

Letting out a heavy sigh, you cast your gaze down at your lap.  “You hurt me Chris.  All those years I was trying to figure out what I did wrong to make you want me out of your life.  And when I finally came to the conclusion that I didn’t do anything wrong, I decided to just try and forget about you.”  You snuck a peak at him and you saw him nod his head at your words.  He knew he was wrong with what he did and he wished he could take it all back.  “It was hard at first.  I grew very depressed, knowing I lost my best friend.  But over time I was able to forget you as much as I could.  Then you came waltzing back into my life at Sebastian’s party and my feelings for you came bubbling up to the surface again.  I just-I just don’t know what to do.”

Chris got up from his chair and kneeled in front of you.  He grabbed your hands with his as his eyes were pleading.  “I know I fucked this up Jess.  I’m so fucking sorry.  I was a stupid kid in the entertainment world and I lost who I really was.  I can’t believe how stupid I was back then.  I didn’t care about anything or anyone’s feelings, least of all yours.  I can’t regret enough how I treated you and I don’t blame you one bit if you never forgive me.”  Chris had tears in his eyes and because you had known him so long, you knew they were sincere; your own tears emerging at your eyes.  

It was a constant battle with your brain and your heart; tearing you in two directions.  It was everything you wanted, to be with Chris since you were in high school.  But then he moved away, and everything changed.  It was as if you meant nothing to him; causing your life to spiral out of control.  What would happen if he were to do that again?

“But-but what if you decided you didn’t want to be with me after we started dating?  What would happen to us then?  Would you just ignore me again?  Because I don’t know if I could handle that again Chris.”

Chris shook his head quickly.  “It wouldn’t happen baby.  I know what I want.  I don’t want some actress to date.  I don’t want anybody in the lime light.  I want you. I want somebody who I’ve loved since I was a teenager.  I want somebody who feels like home and that person is you.”

Your tears were cascading down your cheeks as Chris spoke; your heart hanging onto his every word.  You wanted to believe him, to give him a chance to prove himself to you.  But you were terrified of what was to happen if things didn’t work out.  

Tag List: @badassbaker @guera31 @princess-evans-addict @tanelle83 @xjjlex @chrisevansfanfic @joannie95 @pumbibaby @patzammit @brastrangled @mrs-captain-evans @notyourtypicalrose @sfreeborn @esoltis280 @xxloki81xx @bornfortherainydays @jinoraskies @poerebel @livslookingforloki

[brieannakeogh]

Dog Days of Summer- Ch 6

Dog Days of Summer- Chris Evans X plus sized reader. Dog days of summer are usually defined as the hottest of the year, some define it as lazy days. This year ‘hottest’ has nothing to do with the outside temp. You meet Chris and Dodger Evans while taking your own dog to the park.

Previous Chapter / Master List

Warnings: Cursing and fluff, mild angst

It was about 10pm when your phone dinged. You had already changed into pjs when he left your apartment, and had just finished brushing your teeth when it went off.

“Tonight was fun. Thank you for cooking and having me over for dinner. I was thinking maybe we could take the dogs back to the park tomorrow. It’s been a few days since we saw our friend Ron.”

“It was a very pleasant evening. I had three very handsome good boys in my apartment all night. My neighbors are all going to be jealous. The park sounds great and I think Ron has been very happy we’ve stayed away. Also thanking you for shopping with me. If I had known dinner was going to be a regular thing, I would have included you in more meal planning. We’re going to have to go again soon since it won’t stretch as long with the two of us.”

“I hope you don’t feel obligated, we don’t have to do that. I can also pay for half the groceries too.”

You didn’t see it as an obligation at all, just another way to spend time with him. The fact that he seemed a little insecure himself, endeared him to you even more.

“I actually really like the idea and don’t worry about the money. I’ll get it out of you in slave labor, for toting all those bags, and in gas for using your car.” You were now properly in bed, Popcorn laying at your feet, with the light off.

“Lol, fair enough. I’ve got a few reps I need to do before I hit the sack, if I’m going to hold all the grocery bags.”

“You’re going to work out this late at night? I’m already in bed, lights off, ready for sleep.” You can’t say he wasn’t dedicated.

“I could counter it’s a little early to be going to bed. Let me guess you wear feety pajamas to bed?”

Was he indirectly asking what you were wearing? Your thoughts went directly into dirty territory, but you were trying to fight it. “Don’t say it, don’t say it.” You mumbled to yourself as you typed in a reply. Of course you don’t listen to yourself and text him back with a flirty response.

“Feety pjs are good for lounging, but I don’t like to be restricted when I sleep. Clothing tangles too much when I toss and turn.” Which was true, nude sleeping was always the best. “I had planned to read for a bit before going to sleep as well. I need to...let’s say, relax, after that kiss.” Your eyes widened and you bolted upright after you reread what you sent. While you were a much better and braver flirt over text and chat than you ever were in real life, your heart pounded wondering if you had gone too far, especially after he took longer to respond. Almost two minutes had passed before you see the three little dots from where he was typing again.

“I see a cold shower in my future. Probably multiple this week.”  You sigh in relief and lay back down slowly. “I’ll let you go...relax and if you ever need help with that, you have my number. Goodnight and sweet dreams.”

“Goodnight.” You reply simply ignoring his offer of help comment, tempted to text him back right then, but you knew it wasn’t the time. He had you so worked up, that it didn’t take long for you to be able to cum and relaxed enough to sleep. Your dreams full of blue eyes and a ruddy brown beard.

The next morning you expected to wake up groggy, but giddy excitement from everything that happened yesterday still flowed through your veins. So much for taking it slow.

Your phone already had a message from Chris, telling you a time to meet him at the park and then after you hadn’t responded, teasing you for sleeping in so late. Rolling your eyes as it’s still before 11am, you shoot him a quick text back confirming the time.

Getting yourself and Popcorn ready for the day you head out in time to meet Chris at the dog park. You see him sitting on what you have dubbed in your head as ‘our’ bench and walk over to him. He’s gone casual in his backwards baseball cap, sunglasses and sweatpants. The hoodie he’s wearing looks super soft too. Spotting you as you get nearer, he goes to stand, but you wave him back down as you unhook Popcorn and sit beside him, leaning into his side.

“Hi.”

“Hi.” He answers back.

“Fancy meeting you here.” You smirk. “Where’s the pupper? I was expecting kisses.”

“He’s found another playmate.” Chris points to the other side of the park where Dodger is chasing a black and tan dog around playfully. “But I can volunteer my services for kisses if ya like. Guaranteed less slobber.” He smiles, eyebrow arched.

You’re surprised and look around at the other people in the park. “I mean, I don’t mind but don’t you worry someone will…” He cuts you off with a quick chase kiss to the mouth, forehead and cheek.

“See no one noticed, and even if they did fuck ‘em.” He tells you, wrapping his arm around your shoulders, and you find you are quite content to just lay your head back into his arm and watch the dogs play. Well dog play, because like usual Popcorn is lying near the bench asleep.

The two of you fall into small talk. Typical things like the weather and the show you had watched the night before, which quickly turns into politics and heavier topics somehow. Chris is pleasantly surprised you share a lot of his views and the ones where you differ are not deal breakers for either of you.

You love watching the passion in his eyes as he talks about the different subjects, much more so then when the topics were light and fluffy. He was ranting about climate change and Biff when you couldn’t help but to let out a giggle.

“What?” He asks with a soft smile.

“Nothing, I just really like this. I’ve just never gotten into this heavy of a conversation after, what? This is technically our second date right? Does yesterday count as a date since it morphed halfway through?”

“I would qualify it as a second date. You knew my intention when you invited me over for dinner, plus you changed and straightened up.”

“Caught that did you?”

“Again, were you trying to be subtle?” You laugh and shake your head. “Also isn’t it better to go ahead and get deal breakers out of the way. I mean we aren’t getting any younger and it would suck if we liked each other a lot and than hit a wall.”

“Ok, shoot.”

“Let’s see….of course you would have to be ok with the actor, famous thing. I won’t want to go officially public until I’m sure. I don’t want to share my private life in front of an audience.”

“That’s perfectly fine with me. The red carpet seems stressful.” He smirks a little at that.

“Also permanent residence here in Boston, and kids. I’ll want those.”

You nod at the Boston, but pause at the kids. This you were iffy on. “I don’t want kids right now, but maybe if I find the right guy, in a few years.” You look up to him and he doesn’t seem bothered by that.

“That’s understandable. You want a little time as a couple before kids.” You nod at him. “Must love dogs and Disney.” Which you roll your eyes at. He’s seen your Disney collection and the dogs are why you are there in the first place. “What about you?”

“Hmmm well, the away on set all the time will be hard, but I’ve dated workaholics before. Can people visit?”

“Depends and sometimes I don’t have a lot of free time when filming.”

“I think it’s manageable. I’m pretty flexible, just the obvious things. Ya know like cheating.” He nudged you in the side to be more serious. “I don’t know, I can’t think of any. I mostly just don’t want to be treated like shit and taken for granted. Which is why the long away periods worries me. Not about you but that my insecurities will fester and tell me why the hell would you want to date me? Then you don’t answer a text and I’ll freak out which will make you mad and upset because you didn’t do anything wrong, you were just working.” Saying all of that quickly in in one breath, you huffed out and relaxed your shoulders.

“Wow, that got real, and dark.”

You roll towards him, putting an arm around his waist and your forehead on his chest. “I warned you I was crazy.” He snort laughs. “No, I’m just thinking extremes. It’ll probably be fine.”

Chris’s hand rubs circles on your lower back. “You know I have to make out with people and pretend to have sex too right?” His voice is very serious like that’s been a problem in the past.

You sit up and look at him in the eye. “Uhhh I’ve watched your movies before...I know how acting works.” The confusion in your voice evident.

“It’s just been a problem in the past when I’ve dated someone not in the industry.”

“That won’t be a problem. It’s a job you’re working, that doesn’t count as cheating and I’m not the jealous type. Honestly, how do you think my ex-fiance got away with it so long? I knew it was just him and his secretary at work all night alone together but I believed him when he said he was working. I’m stupidly trusting.”

“Optimistic is what you are.”

“Optimistic huh? I like that. So no deal breakers found. Does that mean we can go eat lunch, I’m starving.”

He chuckles and calls Dodger back. At the little dog friendly bistro the hostess asks how many, which Chris confirms two, but you interrupt asking if Ron is working.

“What are you doing?” Chris whispers in your ear and you wave him off.

“It looks like he is and he has a table open on the patio if you prefer to be seated in his section?”

An evil grin comes on your face as you tell her “That would be lovely.” Chris shaking his head at you the whole time.

The hostess seats you with a couple of menus and Chris just keeps looking at you with a “I can’t believe you are doing this again.” look on his face as he tries to keep from laughing.

You watch as Ron steps up to your table, not really looking at either of you, as he goes into his spiel on welcoming to the restaurant and what specials there are.

He looks up with a polite smile on his face and you see the look die in his eyes as he recognizes the two of you, unconsciously taking a step back. Chris is hiding his face in his menu, but you can see the shaking of his shoulders.

“Hiya Ron! Long time no see. How’s life been treating ya?” The excitement in your voice breaks an audible snicker from Chris.

“Just fine ma’am. What can I get you to drink?” Ron is trying to be as professional as possible and you have to admire him for that.

“I think waters all around?” You look to Chris who nods, not able to say anything. “Don’t forget thing one and thing two.” You point to the dogs.

Ron grips his pen a little tighter. “It was separate checks correct?”

You look him right in the eye without blinking. “No Ron, not anymore.” And you smirk.

Ron huffs out an irritated sigh and turns on his heel to leave.

Laughter from across the table makes you break into a fit of your own giggles.

“Was that why you wanted Ron’s section?”

“He looked down his nose at me last time, so I wanted show him he shouldn’t judge people. I know it’s a little on the petty side but just let me have my fun.”

“Hey you have as much fun as you want, but you’re paying for the tip. I’m not going to be trying to judge how much extra to give based on how much of an annoyance you were to him. We’re still in the ‘everything is endearing and cute’ stage.”

“So ‘everything is endearing and cute’, you say? I don’t think I’ve heard of that stage. Can you give me an example, use it in a sentence?”

A sly smile forms on his face that has you worried. “For example, that cute little screech you do when I leave.”

Your face heats up instantly. “You heard that huh?”

“The whole floor heard it, but it was cute.”

“Aww you think I’m cute?” Ron stops by the table to drop off water. “Ron did you hear that? He thinks I’m cute.”

“That you were acting cute.” Chris corrected.

“Ron we’ve known each other a while now. Do you think I act cute or just am cute?”

Ron blinks down at you and turns his head to Chris. “Sir sincerely good luck to you and you have my deepest sympathies.” He turns on his heel and walks away from the table without looking back at you.

“Wait? Was that a joke? Did Ron actually make a joke?” You asked Chris excitedly.

“I’m am now certain you have broken Ron.” Chris nods solemnly.

You both crack up at that and then actually read the menu instead of pointing at something random. Leaving Ron alone for the rest of lunch, you still provide him with generous tip at at the end and you think you see a smirk when he comes to pick it up.

The short walk back to your apartment is nice. Conversation flows naturally and you don’t feel as if you need to fill up all the space with talking. The awkwardness you use to feel having the gorgeous man keep pace beside you has all but dissipated. You still find it strange, but his presence puts you at ease. You’re starting to think that maybe this could work, although you didn’t know for sure until you had to go months apart. That was the real test.

The two of you step out of the elevator and into the hall, the dogs in tow. Another plan of watching tv to pass the time before dinner was already in the works. Chris wanted to finish the show you were watching and you were happy to oblige.

Sticking the key in the lock, it turns but without the telltale click when it unlocks. Your brow furrows and you pause with your hand on the doorknob.

“Everything alright?” Chris asks from behind you.

“The door wasn’t locked. I could have sworn I locked it when I left.” His face mimics yours with a frown.

“Step back and take the dogs. Let me go in first just to check.” You really want to argue but you’re scared and he gives you hard look when he hands you the leashes to not argue. He tries to be quiet as he slowly opens the door. You can’t help but to try to peek in around him but his wide shoulders don’t leave much room around the doorway. After he steps inside, he pulls the door to but not completely shut, keeping you on the other side in the hallway.

“Who the fuck are you?!” You hear someone who is definitely not Chris, shout from the apartment. You knew that voice, you had fucked that voice. No longer sitting on the sidelines you barged in and see Matt standing in the living room, arms crossed like he had just caught an intruder.

“I could ask the same buddy.” Chris responded with very similar pose, although with a couple more inches, height and width, on Matt. Chris was much more intimidating.

“Chris it’s fine.” You come up behind him with a hand to his lower back, and he looks down at you confused. “Well it’s not fine but I’ll handle it.” You shove the leashes into his hands as you move between them. “Chris this is my asshole Matt. Asshole this is Chris.” Chris’ eyes flash with recognition and he takes a look at the ex-fiance, judging him on all levels. “Now that we are all caught up, what the fuck Matt? You can’t just let yourself in. You don’t live here anymore and you said you gave me all your keys.”

“I’m still paying for the place. I can stop by if I want to.”

“No, no you can’t, that was the agreement. You moved out and moved in with your side bitch, and as an apology for making me quit my job and move to Boston, you paid rent up for this place until I could find a job.” You were so angry, you were boiling. You didn’t shout, your voice just got cold and deeper as your rage rolled off of you. Matt had never been smart about telling your moods and today was no exception. Chris on the other hand, stepped a little closer, towering at your back to add even more menace to your words, or possible hold you back when you launched yourself at him. It was hard to tell.

Matt scoffs. “Don’t give me that. Who’s this fucker? You’re telling me you weren’t fucking him on the side while we were together?”

“That’s exactly what I’m say, not that you have any right to know. What are you even doing here Matt?” You were suddenly tired and just ready to get this man out of your apartment so you could settle on the couch with Chris. Matt’s eyes shift from you to Chris and then glance at the bedroom. “Oh my god! You can’t be serious!” This you did shout. “You wanted to stay here? Did she kick you out already?” Matt at least had the decency to look ashamed this time, before he went into begging mode.

“Come on Marshmallow, we had good times right? It’s been miserable without you.” Chris’s hand on your shoulder tightened when your ex tried to win you back with nonsense. The audacity he had to pull this stunt in front of who was obviously your new boyfriend, and much bigger than he is, was ludicrous. Uncrossing your arms from your chest, you place a hand over Chris’s to give him a bit of comfort, not that he even needed it. He knew how you felt about the man in front of you, that was digging himself deeper with each word he spoke.

“Matt, please leave. You cheated on me, we’re done.” You cut him off as he was telling you what a ‘big mistake he made was’, but you couldn’t care less. It was very simple to you. “Hand Chris your keys on the way out, he needs one anyway. This will save us a trip.”

The nice guy act that Matt had been putting on melted in front of you. “You can’t honestly fucking expect me to believe you’re dating this guy?! He’s probably just the dog walker. You couldn’t get someone like this to fuck you unless you were paying them. That’s exactly what you’re doing isn’t it! Yeah you had to get yourself a fucking escort since nobody would touch you!” Matt sneers at you.

Chris was right to have come up closer, because you did in fact attempt to launch yourself at him, more in his defense than your own. Even with his muscles he had a hard time containing you, especially when you threw your weight into it. What got you to calm down was Chris’s loud booming voice calling your name. It sounded just like Captain America was disappointed in you.

“Ok, I’m done staying out of it. Matt or whatever the fuck your name is, hand over the keys. If I ever find out that you were in my girlfriend’s house again, without her permission, I will have a reason to use the myriad of lawyers I keep on retainer.” He turns to you and hands you the leashes to the dogs, who are both looking scared after being witness to the fight. “Take the dogs into your bedroom and calm them down, while I escort him out and down to the lobby.” He runs a finger over your cheek and you realize a stray tear had run down. All you can do is nod and you go around to the back of the apartment to the bedroom. You can hear some muffled talking before the front door closes again.

“Shhh, it’s ok guys, it’s all over now.” Kneeling on the floor you pick up Popcorn and wrap an arm around Dodgers neck, burying your face into the fur on his back.

After what could have been either a few minutes or 15, time wasn’t moving correctly in your world, the door creaks open with Chris leaning on the doorway. He sees you in the floor, arms wrapped around both dogs and his eyes soften. “Did he give you the key?” You ask him. He holds it by the key ring and lets it dangle. “That’s good. I’m really sorry about that. I never thought that he would ever show up here again. I hadn’t prepared for it.”

He sighs and squats down beside you, a hand on your head running it over your hair. “We did move a little fast as well. It was just such a rare opportunity, for both of us, where we didn’t have other things so we could spend as much time as we wanted together. I was enjoying it.”

“Me too.” You bite your lip, debating whether or not you wanted to ask what was on your mind. “Did he say anything else?”

Chris’ eyes flashed for a moment and he took his hand from you. “If you want to take him back just tell me now. I can’t say I understand, but I know you have a history.”

“What?” You were thoroughly confused until it clicked. He thought you were asking if he said anything more about taking you back. “Fuck no I don’t want him back. I just wanted to make sure he didn’t make any threats to you or the dogs or anything. Him being in here and letting himself in freaked me out. What if he has another key?” You were starting to panic and he could hear it in your voice. He sat beside you in the floor and pulled you to him.

“I don’t think he does, although I’m going to have to let my manager know. He finally recognized me when we got to the lobby. He seemed more scared when he figured it out, which was weird. I’m still going to have to keep an eye on it to make sure he doesn’t try to cash the story into the tabloids.”

“Uggg this was not what I wanted. This is your vacation time, you don’t need to be more stressed.” You bang your forehead into his chest, a soft ‘ow’ from him stops you.

“Let’s just forget about it for now and go relax on the couch like we’d planned. After we’ve both calmed down than we can talk.”

It was that word, talk, that dreaded word that got your heart racing again. So much for relaxing tonight.

Next Chapter

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[purplesurveys]

655

Can you name a uniquely named crayon in the Crayola 64 pack? The one color name I have never ever EVER forgotten in the last 15 or so years I’ve been aware of Crayola 64, is macaroni and cheese. I used it a lot solely because of its name. Carnation pink was also pretty unique to me, and I remember being bothered as a kid as to why they didn’t just name it pink lmao. What kind of car did your parents have while you were growing up? We used to have a sky blue Mitsubishi Lancer that was around for a little over a decade. Do you tie your socks together or roll them up? I roll them up and put it in a ball. I am not aware that tying up socks is a thing. When's the last time you had peanut butter? Ooh, safe to say it was many months ago. I don’t really like peanut butter as a filling; I like peanut-butter flavored food more, but I haven’t had those in a while, either. What was your last bad date? It’s been a while. My girlfriend and I barely see each other, so we try not to fight in the 1-2 times a week that we get to hang out.

Do you ever wish your birthday was on a different day? In 2019 I certainly wished it was on a different day, because my birthday then was on the same day as Easter and none of my friends were available to celebrate with me – save for Angela who went great lengths to make sure she at least had dinner with me and made me feel less sucky. What holiday would you want to have your birthday on? I’d never want to have my birthday on a holiday again, if that last answer wasn’t clear enough. Have you ever gone snorkeling or scuba diving? I’ve gone snorkeling in Boracay and Palawan, and that one time we went on a beach trip for biology class in high school. I’ve never tried scuba diving, and I’m a little anxious to give it a shot if ever because I feel like it’s a little more complicated to follow than just snorkeling.

If yes, what's the coolest thing you've seen? Allow me to be a kid in answering this, because the genuinely coolest creatures I have ever seen are the Nemo and Dory kinds of fish :)))))) Do you sunburn easily? As a kid yes. They used to hurt a lot too. I don’t sunburn at all now but I do get very tan. What's your favorite filling in chocolates? Peanut butter. When's the last time you had a smore? Sometime in senior year of high school. I had a brief phase of liking smores, but then I ordered it too much and I got tired of it quickly. Have you read the Twilight series? More times than I could count. Does your best friend have any phobias? Not really a phobia but Gabie doesn’t like being in malls as they are closing because she gets scared of the sound of the roll-up doors getting pulled down. She says she feels like she’ll get trapped inside the mall hahaha. What's the last thing you said to your mom? I asked her if she wanted a kind of snack I know she likes, since I’ll be passing by the store that has them. Why couldn't you go to sleep the last time you were up all night? This doesn’t happen to me, fortunately. If I can’t sleep, watching YouTube videos while in bed would do the trick. What breed of dog do you find the most annoying? Fucking chihuahuas. I care for them whenever it’s necessary e.g. if I hear a story about an abused chihuahua, but in the grand scheme of things I do not like them at all. Do you prefer the taste of lemon or limes? Lemon. What do you think about Sarah Palin running for president in 2012? I don’t have much knowledge or opinion of politics of other countries. What would you name your firstborn son? I’d definitely insert a tribute to my significant other’s dad as a second name, but I’m still not 100% sure on a first name. Do you cook anything you don't like eating? I can’t even cook food that I do like, lmao. What's the last picture you colored? It’s a photo of a group of houses, which is a page in an adult coloring book that I own. Do you make out sentences out of the little Vday candy hearts? No. What is the cheesiest way a guy could propose marriage? Idk, anything can be cheesy/sweet as long as you pull it off.

Do you watch any reality shows on MTV or VH1? I never did. Would you have a better chance of surviving in the Sahara or Alaska? Sahara. I’m in a tropical climate, so I feel like I’d have some survival hacks somewhere hot. I don’t know how winter works at all, and what to prepare for it. When's the last time you pet a cat? Last night, when I played with the only kind cat in my college. Were you missing your front teeth as a child? My front teeth were the first ones to fall out, so for a time I was missing them, yes. They grew back after a few months though, as did my other teeth. Do you remember Eureka's Castle on Nick JR? I always encounter the title but I don’t think I’ve actually seen it or if it aired here at all. What's the last song you hummed to cuz you didn't know the lyrics? The new songs Hayley Williams put out AS A SOLO ARTIST!!!!!!!!!!!! that I have yet to memorize – Sudden Desire, Creepin’, and Cinnamon. What would you say is Paris Hilton's occupation? She’s a businesswoman. And a successful one at that, lmao. If you could have a body like any celebrity's, who would it be? Idk I don’t find myself wanting anyone’s figure. If you could have any celebrity's baby, who would it be? Now this is just creepy. Do you know anyone whose name starts with Sh? Yeah, I have an orgmate named Shealea, a co-member in the graduating batch committee named Shaira, and a high school batchmate named Shela. I’m sure there are more but they’re the first ones I remembered. What's the worst Christmas present you've ever received? I don’t rate my gifts from best to worst. I’ve loved all my gifts. Are you wearing a necklace? Nopes. Do you have any noticeable moles or birthmarks? I have a birthmark behind my left shoulder that’s visible when I’m wearing a sleeveless top, and a mole on my right arm. Is there a salon you religously go to for beauty care? No. Quite the opposite situation actually - I haven’t been to a salon since 2018 :/ Count to ten in another language. I know two other languages (Filipino and Korean), so I’ll just give both of theirs haha. Isa, dalawa, tatlo, apat, lima, anim, pito, walo, siyam, sampu; and hana, dul, set, net, daseot, yeoseot, ilgop, yeodeol, ahop, yeol. Do you feel uncomfortable telling friends they have boogers in their nose? Yeah, but I don’t encounter this situation a lot. What do you remember from sex ed class when you were younger? We weren’t given sex ed, we were just taught the female and male reproductive systems in Grade 5 and that was it. I didn’t know how babies were made until I was in Grade 6, and before that I just thought all women who got married got pregnant automatically, as if the body knows.

What's the first instrument you ever played? That I don’t necessarily know how to play? My best guess is the piano. My mom took photos of me when I was a year old playing the grand piano at my aunt’s house, so that was probably the first. Are you a mommy's child or daddy's child? Daddy’s girl, for sure. What's the last thing you wore around your neck? A lanyard holding my car keys. My ID used to be attached to the lanyard but I’ve since lost it, so now it’s my keys that hang from it. Would you ever eat rhino meat? Like once, just to try it out and because I’m more of an adventurous eater. Who do you think deserves an award? Me, after finishing the shitstorm that was last week lol. Have you ever had a friend break up with a bf/gf for you? No. Do you own any books with a red cover? Yeah. Chris Jericho’s second autobiography Undisputed is predominantly red.

[musicallisto]

hello there, love! can i request to be shipped from a male character in the sophomore, ilitw, and high school story? I'm a female with dark brown eyes (almost black) and jet black hair. I'm slightly tan. I like listening to music especially indie and bands (coldplay, imagine dragons, bastille), movies, eating at fast foods alone, can appreciate dry and self deprecating humor. i hardly open up but i like listening to others. i get attach to fictional characters, d eEP CONVERSATIONS && theories!!

we have the same music taste vkvkvkvkvk

I Ship You With…

Z I G   O R T E G A

(faceclaim: Santiago Segura)• You would introduce him to soooo much good music. Actually, it would be an exchange, because you both know some excellent artists and tracks and you’re dying to share them with someone, stan them and bingewatch their concerts and interviews. When you first meet and eventually start dating, you have very different musical tastes but as days pass and you begin to show each other your favorite songs, they evolve into a perfect mixture of the best of your favorite genres! You end up creating a collaborative Spotify playlist - you know, those kinds of playlists that you can both freely add songs to and when you’re not sleeping with each other, it’s a tradition to send the other the link to your favorite song at the moment. That way, you discover tons of new bands to stan and Zig becomes this huge Imagine Dragons and Muse fan (also he develops a slight admirative crush on Chris Martin but like who doesn’t have a crush on this man honestly, a true hero)

• Okay you like eating at fast foods alone and he’s very concerned about his diet, his well-being and his health since he must remain in perfect shape for his ballet, so it’s not that often that you eat pizza or burgers together. (actually, close to never.) so instead, you have these homecooked, delicious meals where you just invite each other, cook together and end up tasting your, ahem, culinary invention. Neither of you are gifted cookers so it usually ends up in a huge food fight in the kitchen, tainting poor, passing-through Becca’s blouse and terrified-yet-mildly-amused Aaron’s T-shirt. There’s cake preparation on every single wall and on the floor as well, strawberries dead on the countertops and eggshells laying wounded next to the bowl, so it’s safe to say that cookery speaking, it’s a disaster, but neither of you really mind after the absolutely amazing reenactment of a medieval battle you’ve just made, and when Zig leans in to “wipe from flour off your face” (it quickly turns into a heated make-out session on the worktop until a traumatized Zack walks in and yells he’ll need to “sluice his eyes with acid to forget the obsecenity he just witnessed”.

T Y L E R

(faceclaim: Harry Shum Jr.)• MOVIES AND TV SHOWS MARATHONS, ohmygod, so many of them. The funny thing is neither of you actually have a Netflix account. You’re just constantly stealing your friends’ codes, especially Becca’s and Chris’s, because they’re too busy working or… doing undefined presidential stuff to notice and also to even use their Netflix. So you’re basically the hugest moochers the world has ever known but none of you mind because what’s the point of having Netflix if you’re not gonna use it, that shit’s expensive plus they’re technically just doing a friend favor amirite? So you regularly have The Crown And The Flame marathons, you know how much Tyler loves that show and even if at first you only agreed to watch it so he would stop talking about it 25/8, you ended up adoring the story and the characters, so you watch the three seasons every once in a while and can basically recite all the script by heart. You even dressed up as Annelyse for Halloween so you would match with Tyler and Abbie! Your personal guilty pleasure, however, are Cassandra Leigh movies, that woman is just so talented and beautiful, and her acting is always on point! Tyler wasn’t a huge fan of it at first but eventually liked her movies more and more (and also, he just loves to see his best friend happy and fangirling over her movies, because it’s cute and rewarding and also it can always be useful for blackmailing so be warned)

• You are King and Queen of self-deprecating humor and dark references and memes that literally no one else understands. Sometimes you’ll just look at each other and literally say or do NOTHING and burst out laughing like a bunch of kids. You just have so many private jokes and memories with Tyler that are simply impossible to understand for someone who doesn’t have a brain and a sense of humor wired like yours. Also there’s literally no boundaries in your self-mockery, like you’ll just point at a trash can in the street and simply say “same” and the rest of the gang will ask you why you say that, telling you it’s not true, you’re beautiful and worth it etc., but Tyler will randomly laugh because he knows. And at this point it’s become a competition between you. You have yet to decide the prize but whoever comes up with the best self-deprecating punchline wins… something. Between the “you know they made a day dedicated to me? It’s garbage day!” and the “my personality in a nutshell is the loser character trait from the Sims”, it’s a concerto of mockery and the others don’t understand how you can possibly laugh at somethiing so sad?? but intellectuals (Tyler and you) know it’s the best form of humor and the tournament still goes on day by day

N O A H   M A R S H A L L

(faceclaim: Nick Robinson)• Before anyone comes @ me, I KNOW HE’S NOT A LI AND HE’S A TRAITOR BUT ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE WHEN YOU LIVE IN AN ESCAPIST FANTASY CREATED AS A SELF-DEFENCE MECHANISM TO COPE WITH THE HARDSHIPS OF LIFE so yeah I ship you with Noah. You would help him after Jane’s death, being the most comprehensive and supportive friend ever. Despite your young age, you knew what Noah wanted in those troubled times what a lot of space and quiet, and every now and then a friend to talk to, to distract himself.That’s what you became for him. When all the others children were circling around him like vultures, asking for stories, all the juicy and gruesome details about her death, about that supposed thing that thing that supposedly killed her, you were the one who scared them away, protecting your best friend and telling them how inconsiderate and heartless they were being. You easily were one of the most mature and friendly people he’d ever known, also giving him support and sometimes advice to face his mother and the abrupt departure of his father. When you grew up, you always helped him stay focused on what really mattered to him, reminding him of the diner he wanted to open, of his plans for the future. It was only a matter of years until he realized he was in love with his childhood best friend, who had been there for him through the good and the bad.

• Since you started dating Noah, a few years after the end of high school because he was not feeling ready to be involved romantically with anyone then, you realized that your attachment to fictional characters started to evolve. You could almost always see a pattern in the characters you prefered in books: it was often the lonely, tortured and sarcastic character, withdrawn because of his dark past, and you were quick to determine that it was because of how much they reminded you of Noah after all the shit happened. He was feeling a lot better now, and you could see how radiant he was in his culinary major, but you always remembered all the hardships you had to face and all the self-esteem issues you had to fight from both sides. Also, Noah understood perfectly what it was like to be completely fucked up by a book or a TV show, and to get attached to a character to the point that you can’t stop thinking about them and feel like a own member of your family died when the sadistic author decides to put an end to their suffering. (can u tell this is personal experience) He never judges you and always comforts you when your favorite character died or is having a hard time or your OTP became canon or you’re just hyperventilating/ugly crying because of fictional universes.

• After several years of fighting and struggling, and many days of hopefulness, Noah’s dream of opening his own diner finally comes true and he’s more glowing than you’ve ever seen him. He’s incredibly thankful because not only have you been morally helpful, you’ve also helped him economically and he doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to repay you. You don’t want anything of course: just saying your boyfriend truly happy is fabulously rewarding. Baby Jane’s soon becomes a known spot for Westchester locals, who more or less all know Noah from the time he lived there, and it feels weird yet great to move back to your hometown after so many years. You sometimes help him when you have a day off work, cooking with him or, more usually, you work as a waitress because he playfully kisses you while saying “Listen, I love you a lot, but I’m better slaving over a hot stove.” You don’t mind, because it’s always a pleasure to work with him and since the customers remember you from your younger days, you get the chance to chat with them and reunite with your old group of friends, who come to visit you every once in a while. It’s a calm and placid life, but after everything you’ve been through, it’s everything you want and deserve.

A N D Y   K A N G

(faceclaim: Min Jun Qian)• Your best friend would be Andy, and this since childhood, just like Noah! He would be a rock for you, always there to cheer you up and listen to you when you’re down, and you would be equally comforting to him, especially when he’s going through figuring out his life and his identity. He would’ve been so lost without you during his childhood and adolescence, after the terrifying Jane drama and everything that came after. He quickly becomes you partner in crime and, being a little more extroverted than you, he’s often the one who introduces you to his friends, invites you to parties through mutual acquaintances, and sometimes even gives you ideas for uh… some not-so-authorized stuff in the school, but you only agree if you know it’s perfectly safe and you don’t risk anything (or at least, anything too important) because you have to admit the thrills and the adrenaline are what you live for in those little moments, especially with your best friend.

• He’s also the one you can have deep conversations with during high school. You know Noah is still too emotionally bruised to talk about things that he may consider “depressing” or “too big for children to understand”, and you respect that he doesn’t want to get involved in those kinds of heavy reflections. However, you really want to discuss about them with someone, and Andy is the perfect person for that. He’s very open-minded, intelligent and ressourceful. His goofy, funny side always adds a twist to the theories you already know and debate about - “maybe you are an Illuminati, how can I be sure I can trust you?” (to which you answer “you can’t” with a malicious smile). Sometimes it’s not even that deep, it’s just talking about what you think is going to happen next in your favorite TV shows or books, or discussing a character’s psychology - it often happens that Andy and you have drastically opposed points of view on the same character and you like to confront them and understand why the other likes them, or hates them.

• Your favorite spot to talk about those theories and have those philosophical conversations about the moon, the earth, society and reality is in his garden. When you were kids, you used to have sleepovers at his house and your parents never minded because they were friends with Andy’s; now that you’re older, you basically spend most of your free nights at his place, laying on the grass and watching the navy blue sky. You built a little wooden house in the trees in his backyard when you were twelve, with the help of your friends and his parents, and it has a perfect view of the sky and the trees below. At first, going up there is very difficult, especially surrounding yourselves with trees and the singing of the forest, but the more you went up in the tree house, the easier it was to go back to the forest. It’s so calm and placid up there, with only the birds chirping to disturb you, or rather soothe you, and you’ve lost count of the nights you’ve fallen asleep there. It’s the best place to have deep conversations and also silly dares, and it’s so peaceful that you can almost forget all the bad stuff that happened in your youth.

I’m sorry but I didn’t have time to write a long headcanon like those up there for HSS! Just know that I romantically ship you with Michael Harrison, someone you’d be able to talk to about anything, from the silliest things (“do crabs think fish are flying?”) to the deepest (”what do you think Area 51 is really?”), and he’d always be up for a good laugh. And your best friend would be Morgan Jennings, being one of Michael’s best friends, she became yours as well, and you would love the same kind of music and go to concerts together and collectively lose your shit. Everyone thinks Morgan is a little selfish, but you know better than that, and you want to prove everyone that she actually has a heart of gold!

Hope you don’t mind this, I didn’t want to make you wait any longer and it was getting a lot for me to write!

Moodboard

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Playlist

Oasis - Wonderwall (yES)Coldplay - Adventure of a LifetimeArctic Monkeys - R U Mine?Halsey - Ghost