#which. it WAS rude we were in grade school idk why he said that to me

[the-valiant-valkyrie]

thinking abt this again now....

considering that the robots don’t seem to have a great understanding about the difference between robot mortality and human mortality (as expressed by Melvin questioning wether phoenix has their own factory in not a drill), do you think that prism has… sat them down and talked to them about mortality?

specifically her mortality? when she talks about putting the robots above herself during kboom, it doesn’t sound like a thought she had for the first time at that exact moment.

do the robots know that she can’t come back? are they at peace with this fact? or does it… scare them. that the creator they care so much about can be gone in the blink of an instant. permanent death the likes of which they’ve never known

[lov-eable]

TELL ME  ֗ ˖ ࣪ ᩠ ༉‧₊˚ ✿ #01

━━ a filmmaker decides to follow and document the lives of the worst and best students at your school for a month, unfortunately, those students are you and chishiya, the most annoying guy on earth.

masterlist ◌*ꕤ

word count ✦ 1726

A/N: lets not question why the best student is allowed to have dyed long hair, idk either!!!! also kyuma cameo, i just needed someone as the filmmaker so hes kinda ooc take that in mind U_U hope u like it!

05/28/18 12:38

Why did the principal reach out to you to meet him at his office? Were you in trouble? Did he finally decide to expel you because of your scores? No, it couldn’t be, everyone knows that type of thing only happens in American movies, so, why were you waiting there and nervously avoiding eye contact? Also, a weird guy -he was wearing a cap indoors and that was enough for you to consider him weird-, who undoubtedly was not a teacher, even less a student was awkwardly standing in the corner of the room. You prayed for a word, just a single word, that could break the tense silence. As if your prayers had been heard for the very first time in your whole life, the awkward guy with the cap crouched down to whisper something in the director’s ear and as he vaguely nodded, the principal eventually spoke. 

“Miss Kano, I have summoned you to propose and discuss an extracurricular activity involving you and one of your classmates” classmate? Who was he talking about? You started getting more curious, letting go of your previous anxieties, maybe this proposal could be fun, right? As long as they didn't force you to study maths for two hours every day after school, it would be pleasant. You heard the strange man clear his throat and you prepared yourself to finally hear him talk, he made you more curious than creeped out. “It seems your, uh, friend may take his time to arrive yet” so your so-called classmate was a guy, your options to guess decreased, “allow me to introduce myself, I’m Kyuma Ginji, filmmaker and the director of this new project”.

Someone knocked on the door softly, so softly it could almost have been ignored if the people in the room weren’t so expectant of the arrival of the fourth member and the principal barely said a word allowing the newcomer to enter the room. Just like that, all your expectations, interest and curiosity died right there without an opportunity to meet the real world. The one classmate who could disturb your day with only his presence set foot into the office and sat in the chair next to you. “Good morning, I’m sorry about the delay, I was taking care of a homework-related matter with Mister Kuzuryu” you tried not to look at him but even his voice annoyed you.

Mr. Kyuma brushed it off and resumed his self-introduction, “now that you both are here, I will explain you my project. Basically, my crew and I want to portray the lives of the senior students with the best and worst grades respectively, and see how you interact with each other for a month” no, simply no, there was no way you would interact with Chishiya for a whole month in front of cameras, not even if a gun was pointed at your head, “if you both agree, we’ll sign a contract and start shooting the first day of June, that way we’ll end at the start of July without disrupting your midterm exams. Please let me know what you think”.

“I think I’ll pass…” “Sir, are we going to get paid?” that rude cat-face with toilet paper-coloured hair dared to cut you off. Who did he think he was? Sometimes, you said to yourself it was nonsense to dislike him with so much energy, and maybe you could start over. You wouldn’t dare to befriend him, but you could finally leave each other alone, but with moments like this, you realized that would never happen. “Yes, of course, all of that information is in more detail in the contract, would you like to see it?” Mr. Kyuma said as he quickly, and really clumsily, directed himself towards his briefcase taking out a portfolio which, you assumed, stored your contracts.

He handed you each a piece of paper which contained all the clauses and conditions, you started reading it but reminded yourself you weren’t interested, if you accepted, you would work closely with Chishiya for a whole freaking month. “Uh, sorry, as I was saying…” “It’s okay, I’ll join the documental” and again, see? This was the reason why you would never work willingly with Chishiya, also, it was odd of Chishiya to accept something like this. No matter how much you disliked him, you couldn’t deny you knew him very well, at the end of the day, you essentially watched him grow. And this wasn’t usual for him. You noticed everyone seeing you expecting an answer, Chishiya smirked at you irritating your insides, “Miss Kano, we only need you to agree and we’ll sign the contracts tomorrow, then start filming as scheduled” oh no, there it was, the pressure. 

It puzzled you why Chishiya agreed to this, the truth is, he had two big reasons; first, he would get paid and the amount was not low, and second, he heard you trying to deny the offer so he figured out that by agreeing, he would have the opportunity to bother you and see that annoyed face of yours that pleased him so much. If we are being honest, it puzzled him as much as you, if not more, why he got so much satisfaction by being around you and pushing your buttons, but the answer was something he deep inside knew he wouldn’t like to acknowledge.

Oh, you were aware there was no way out. Chishiya was already on board and the producer looked at you with puppy-like eyes, anticipating your positive answer. You knew you didn’t owe him anything, but still, he seemed young and hopeful. Even to the untrained eye, it was evident this was his first project. “Uh, why not? But I would like to mention this to my parents first” you talked with hesitation, contemplating the slightest chance your parents would disapprove of their youngest daughter appearing on a documentary showing off her awful grades.

Certainly, your parents weren’t against it, they didn’t even bat an eye, as per usual, they didn’t care about your life while you weren’t out there doing drugs -you weren’t sure about that testament either-. “Could you hand me the salad? Thanks. Yeah, your teacher, or was it your principal? Not so sure, but I got a call, they explained everything. You can participate, honey, it’s not like you’re going to get distracted from your studies or anything” your mom chuckled as if what she had said just recently was funny, but no one else at the table was laughing. Family dinners were always the same, your parents making passive-aggressive comments towards you, maybe praise your sister once or twice and silence. Not awkward, nor comfortable either, just plain silence.

“Mom, I’m not going to join the project” as you said, your parents released a “why?!” into the air in unison. You barely muttered “because I don’t want to” when your dad replied in a demanding tone, “that’s not a valid answer. You never want to do anything. If you do it, you’ll have money and at least one thing to write in your resume” of course the one time you needed your parents to mind their business as they always did was the time they decided to involve themselves into your life. “The man I spoke to earlier mentioned you and Shuntaro Chishiya, if I’m not mistaken, would be filmed. He is Dr. Chishiya’s son, right? He’s the best student, you could use some of his knowledge”.

That was it, you couldn’t stand Chishiya, you couldn’t stand your family, you were at your limit. You stuffed your mouth with the remaining food on your plate and stood up without saying a word, you heard your parents calling your name, but it did not matter to you at the moment. Taking the book you borrowed from the school library and laying in your bed, you found your desired peace, or so you believed until you heard a door knock. You didn’t answer in the case that would make whoever knocked on your door go away. 

It didn’t, instead, a rather familiar face appeared as they opened your door. “Forgot to lock it” Mira grinned at you, “what do you want?” you said while covering your face with the book you were reading at the moment -The Silent Cry by Kenzaburo Oe-. “Can I come in?” you did not use your energy to say no because your sister would ignore you and enter your room whether you like it or not.

She sat next to you in your bed, “I think you shouldn’t deny the film offer”, “are you joining them in this nonsense? Traitor…” you moved yourself to face the wall because you were actually hurt she was taking your parents’ side instead of yours. “It’s a really good opportunity, I don’t think you should miss it, also, why you don’t want to do it? Even though my parents think you are lazy, I know you’re down to try everything at least once”.

“Why are you being so nosy? It’s not like it matters to you or something” you faced her again and stood right up to be at her height. “You are right, it does not matter to me, but clearly does to you, that’s why it’s bothering you so much and you don’t want to say the reason why. Whatever, my opinion shouldn’t be important, but I do think you should do it. You’ll get paid, maybe you could show off some of your poetry, you know, and mom and dad would love to see you” Mira stood up as she talked and was about to disappear through the door that connected your room to the hall but she stopped when you called her name. 

There was a simple phrase you knew you had to say, different from what Mira would have liked to hear, but you didn’t say any of those. “You’re too good with words, you’re like a congressman” your sister laughed leaning against the door, “oh, god, I wish I was a congressman, do you know how much they get paid a year?” a sweet moment of giggles and then, a comfortable silence between you and her settled in the room, “anyways, I have to study, think about what I told you. Good luck with your book”

tag list: @surshica @enslique @httpsimmy @elernity @eshtravagent @fishisahappydog @kreishin @vernon-dursley @mhyunri

[kdjdhdhebx]

let's hear that rant

the reason I didn't just post the rant and said I have one is bc am struggling to phrase it properly... but idk I was just thinking about how I literally do not understand why people keep perceiving me as "innocent"... they always have, and maybe I get it a little bit why it was like that before, but even then we were all children and nerdy and naïve, but I was always especially picked out for being "innocent". I understand why it was like that when I was 12, because I had this thing in my life where I pretended pretended know nothing about sex or romance at school cause i realised it got me attention(even tho it was just lowkey bullying)... so I kept playing innocent when everyone was discovering sex, even tho I knew more about porn, sex and romance than anything of them ever could cause i discovered porn on my dad's phone where weird uncles had chats where they shared porn which he was more or less unwillingly a part of... and i obsessively watched it every night by stealing his phone at night... but then I eventually removed that perception by having a reputation for making scandalous jokes, especially after i moved!!! I started afresh, but still people keep perceiving me as innocent?? even when I was super loud with cusswords, sexual remarks everything... I think amoung my freinds I wasnt the innocent one but still one of the "child like"?? they never patronized me but idk. but ofc in my grade, I was the innocent one, people would always get shocked when when would talk talk me. m in a new environment AGAIN, in fucking uni and for some reason that reputation still have gotten ahold of me again? everyone gets shocked when they discover me smoking or drinking, like they weren't expecting me to do that,, they get shocked if I say I have sucked a dick (which may have to do more with my ugliness than innocence so that's ok but they get shocked to know I know about like kinky sex like wtf)? they get shocked if I wear a dress, of I go clubbing, when they discover that am really good at life advice and social situations and relationships... like idk what the fuck contributes to it? i look unconventional but not nerdy? I wonder if it's the specks? but then am thinking of other people who aren't perceived like that and it really crosses out anything from my appearance from the list of reasons. with my piercings and I show off skin I don't get what it is uk that keeps making people alienate me like this... m considering if it's my super open and naïve behavior, the fact I trust too easily, or that I carry myself like a child, but that doesn't make much sense to me in many cases because some of the people who make those assumptions they don't know me, I haven't held any conversations with them to display my naivety or something... is it just the fact that am kind? that I dont have 2 faces? I was talking to my friend right whose all into all this social politics and playing double games not being genuine etc etc and she was telling me how am like "good" and how no one else in the uni is like that. and she told me about how this other person is probably playing me, and am not getting it... and i realsied that that person was and I thought they were like genuine but ig they are not and they always treat me with like care and a bit of a a patronizing attitude but I let them cause they are like 3 years older than me but now am wondering if it's cause they think of innocent and need to be protected cause people keep doing that... I dont get it, I don't understand how to get rid of this. do I have to be rude to people, and have that thing in my eye that indicates am not genuine or open, that u need to eb vary of me? do I have to start having that obviously fake smile? like every basic bitch does? I can't do genuine, kind, open?? I probably need to shut the fuck up I guess? but m thinking that's so fucked up? m confused all over, I dont even know what am saying and if it makes any sense but yeah

[sugarmaplewings-fics]

Party Jitters

Pairing: Bakugou x anxious reader

Warnings: SWORE (also some anxiety but it’s not too intense. Maybe a bit of bullying, but it’s not really directly to y/n)

Author’s Note:

So this is the first request I’ve ever completed (🎉✨✨🎇) and I’m pretty proud of it! I started out having this go in a completely different direction and I got pretty far along until I decided it wasn’t really the vibe I was going for, so I stopped and started over. I might post the original later (either I’ll finish it up or just as the wip it is) but idk. Tell me if you want it, I guess? Idk, I might just post it anyway bc I do that sometimes.

Anyway, huge thank you to @bozowrites​ for sending in this request! I hope it fit something along the lines of what you were thinking!

Enjoy!

-Sugar

⋘ ────────── ∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗ ───────── ⋙

⋘ ────────── ∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗ ───────── ⋙ 

Oh, if only you knew how you had gotten yourself into this situation now

Except you did know, and it was all your own damn fault

You hated parties. You knew you hated parties; but in a moment of unjustified courage, you had convinced yourself that it was a good idea to get out there more

A friend from your middle school was throwing a get-together for your previous grade, and you thought it might be nice to see some of the kids you’d grown up with

You’d done yourself up with a different hair style and moderately more formal clothes than you wore normally, even convincing your boyfriend to come along with you

But oh, no. This was not good. The furthest thing from a good idea, if you asked your present self

It was as if only now you remembered that there weren’t many people there that you cared to see

You were at someone’s house, music blaring and lights dimmed

Katsuki had wandered off to get you both an age-appropriate beverage, and now you were standing alone in a corner

You spotted the group of kids who used to throw rude comments at you. To be honest, they were pretty rude to everyone, yet somehow they were still considered popular

That was all a whole year ago. We’re in different schools now, it doesn’t matter

Nevertheless, it felt like they wouldn’t stop looking over at you. You swore that one of the girls leaning over to whisper something in her friend’s ear was without a doubt talking about you

What could be wrong with you? You smoothed your top, wondering if you’d somehow magically changed into something else; something out of place and stupid

It felt like any minute they would come over and try to talk to you, even though you’d barely talked to anyone at all the entire time you were here

You felt like an outsider, which was ridiculous, since this was your old class

But no, there it was; the sick, nauseous feeling you were all too unpleasantly acquainted with

You wanted to run, but you’d made all the effort to come here. Where was Bakugou? You couldn’t ditch him

You tapped your fingers against your thigh to the rhythm of the music; a song you’d never heard before

This had been a mistake; a bad idea, and now your throat was starting to close up, the distant beginnings of tears prickling in the corners of your eyes

“Oi.”

Your eyes snapped up from the floor, fearing the worst for a moment

Theywerehere, theywouldtalktoyou, theywouldteaseyou—

Bakugou stood next to you, holding two cups of lemonade

“Here.” He handed you the plastic drink container, and you took it with shaking hands

“Something wrong?” Katsuki asked, noticing

You went to shake your head, but finally thought better of it

“I don’t think I want to be here,” you admitted, sipping at your overly sugary drink

Bakugou scanned your face, setting his cup down on the floor next to the wall beside him

“Did something happen?” he asked, cupping your face in one of his large, strong hands

“No, I just . . . I’m sorry I dragged you here. This isn’t what I thought it would be.”

Bakugou shrugged, pulling you closer into him. “I’m glad I came. Otherwise you’d be here alone.”

You simply nodded, taking a deep breath to right yourself. “I’m glad you’re here too.”

Katsuki slipped his hand into yours, giving it a gentle squeeze. “Wanna get going?”

“Yeah.”

“I’ll take you to my place and we can watch a movie or something. This party’s lame anyway.”

You chuckled. “That’s not very nice.”

“It’s the truth. Now let’s go.”

He pulled you to the center of the room, nearing the crowd of popular kids you’d been watching before

“Hey, is that Bakugou Katsuki?” 

“The slime monster kid?” 

“No, the one from the sports festival.” 

“Same person, dipshit.”

Your boyfriend froze at the sound of his name, slowly turning to glare at your former peers

“What about me?” he questioned, gruff voice easily heard over the sound of the music

“Just wondering what you were doing here,” one of the girls said, giving him an overly pretty and practiced smile. “You didn’t go to this school.”

“No, I didn’t, but I’m leaving your dumb party anyway.”

He started to walk off again, but that was when they spotted you behind him

“(Y/N)?!” 

“Did you bring him here?” 

“Is he supposed to be your boyfriend or something?” 

You swallowed heavily, averting your eyes and walking faster, only to bump into Katsuki’s back

He had stilled in his path, a shadow crossing his eyes. You knew that look, that dangerous expression on his face. Bakugou was little more than a ticking time bomb, and your former classmates had just set him off

He slowly turned again to face them, and you could feel the palm clutching yours growing hotter in its grasp

“Have a problem with her? Or do you have a problem with me?” he asked, voice too low, too quiet

The same girl scoffed, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “It’s just that someone like her? With someone like you? You know what I mean, right guys?”

She snickered, turning back to her friends, who had now turned their full attention to the both of you

You weren’t sure if you’d ever seen Katsuki so angry, which was saying a lot, since he was outraged about something nearly all the time

Trying to prevent him from doing something he’d regret, you tugged at his shirtsleeve

He glanced back at you, face softening the tiniest of fractions

Balling his opposite fist, he walked back to the girl who’d called him out, pointing a finger in her face

“(Y/N) is my girlfriend and I love her, got it? I don’t need the opinions of shitty extras like you on my goddamn relationship. Just get the fuck out of my way and don’t talk to us again.”

With that, he went back to walking out, pulling you behind him in tow. He easily cleared a path for the both of you, yelling when someone wouldn’t move out of the way fast enough

When you were finally outside, he started walking you to the train station so he could take you home

“Don’t listen to those extras,” he finally said. Bakugou slowed down his pace and relaxed his grip on your hand, letting you settle comfortably into step beside him

“We do make quite the couple,” you remarked

He looked over at you, letting his face fall into the smallest of smiles. “Maybe tonight was kind of a shitshow, but you best believe that it won’t last.”

“Oh? Why’s that?”

“Because I’m the best boyfriend there ever was, and I know how to show my girlfriend a good time.”

You grinned, hugging him from the side as you walked. “You most certainly are.” Maybe it wasn’t always a good idea to inflate the blond’s ego, but you couldn’t help but be forever grateful for how he had impacted your life

When it came down to it, Katsuki would always show how much he cared, whether it was in your defense or simply getting you through a tough day

By the time you’d gotten off the train, all your worries had slipped from your mind, walking hand in hand in the moonlit darkness to spend the night at your boyfriend’s home

⋘ ────────── ∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗ ───────── ⋙

Taglist: @basicaegyo​ @iiminibattlehero​ @pyrofanatic​​ @sokkasangel​ @xoxopam4​​

[sugasugawarau]

Synopsis: You knew that Kageyama Tobio was not your soulmate - and that was why you could not help but succumb to the waves that lulled you away from the shores of fate + semi inspired by Eyes Blue like the Atlantic by sistaprod ft. Subvrbs. Also part of @yacoka‘s collab <3 (2.4k words)

Warnings/notes: Some angst near the end, soulmate red string au, gender neutral reader. No beta we die like Rex Lapis so if I ever feel like it this may be edited at some point asdahdhj idk LMAO

— Prologue

There are as many reasons to fall in love with Kageyama Tobio as there are fractals made by the ocean’s breath as the world inhales and exhales, flourishes and wilts, conquers and surrenders. It would not even be a hyperbole to say that in number, they remain unrivalled to the plethora of stars that stain the waves with their reflection and run deeper than the scars of lightyears that paint lines from Cassiopeia to Aquila.

After all, he is the darkest hue of navy blue.

Determination that moves in an orchestra of thundering waves, brandishing on its crest an admirable recklessness, heeding not for the need to call upon courage or confidence; polished instinct that endued one with the same awestruck feeling when facing the beautifully suffocating obscurity of their life in this world, a mixture of raw fear and the need to impart a piece of their soul in everything they do despite how fragile the skin shielding their heart is.

But the best part of loving Kageyama was that you were not - or will ever become - destined to be.

— Shoreline

Red.

It was a word that was always thrown about in conversations, the fuel to the catastrophes that were high school gossip chains, and the colour that held the mangled passion of the string of fate. Garishly predestined and easily tangled by unnecessary complications of jealousy and confusion, it is needless to say that you hated red with more passion than the love it emptily promises with a title as shallow as soulmates.

That was not to say you despised love. There was nothing wrong with love itself, a fact which you had decided firmly since the spry age of four years old. What was wrong was its combination with soulmates: a rigid formula, nothing like the walks with your grandmother on the bright summer roads littered with flowers as her calloused palm gently guided you, or the laughter you shared with your friends after a long run in the rain, hugging each other goodbye at the end of the day despite the muddy battle scars covering your arms and legs from falling countless times.

Your mind could have kept you engaged in your internal debate for longer if you were left to your own devices, but an awkward cough and the sound of a desk shifting towards your right brought you out of your reverie, bringing your drifting thoughts back to the classroom surrounding you.

Perhaps your look of confusion came off as hostile, for the dark-haired boy now sitting next to you looked at you with a slight glare that felt forced, an automatic effort to defend himself.

His tone of voice only confirmed your unconsciously off-putting expression as he gruffly stated, “Group project.” to explain his sudden presence.

“Oh. What’s the topic on?”

An awkward silence had ensued while you tried to calmly collect yourself by gathering a handful of pens from your pencil case after being caught in your heinous crime of not paying attention to your English teacher.

“You don’t know?” Came his reply, causing you to occupy yourself by finding extreme interest in a lime green highlighter you did not have any recollection of ever buying.

“Well, I clearly wasn’t paying attention.”

“You… weren’t?” The slight intonation in his tone was a stark contrast to your initial impression of him and caused you to look up at him, almost letting out an amused snort at his befuddled frown to which he furrowed his brows and shot a challenging “What?” in return. Realizing that he was genuine in believing that you were deep in thought over the lesson, a burst of laughter blossomed past your lips, attracting a few odd looks from your nearby peers and an abashed glare from him.

You paused to take a breath, a repetition of sorries stumbling their way out to appease the onslaught of nagging you thought would follow shortly. Instead, all the boy muttered was a simple, “You’re weird.”

“Sure, but that’s beside the point - were you paying any attention?”

“No.”

Seeing your face contorted to stop yet another bout of laughter to roam its way into the world as a result of his bluntness, he shot out of his seat and announced that he would go ask the teacher, unable to hide his puzzlement as he walked away. He would come to regret this decision when the teacher began to lecture him, earning more heads to turn his way as she scolded him before sending him off dismissively with a sticky note that you assumed had your now long-awaited topic.

Before you could thank him for enduring what could only be one of the worst things to experience as a high school student, he wordlessly handed the piece of paper to you and sat down.

“Kageyama, right? With this project, you’ll have me to thank for the A we’ll get,” you promised confidently, to which he responded with a halfhearted “Good luck.”

If he had been a close friend, you would have taken the small textbook on his desk and gently hit his head at his evident lack of belief in his capabilities, but settled for a clipped sigh instead. After all, you did not want to further contribute to the premature wrinkles Kageyama was making himself prone to with all of the brow-furrowing he did.

This is going to be one long month.

— Largo

Like how the ocean reluctantly caresses the sleeping shore as it wakes from its slumber during low tide, your lives slowly flowed together.

During the first week of your group project with him, he would greet you curtly, and on a few occasions, you would have short conversations about the outline of your book review.

And this singular week was enough to show that there was some (okay, maybe a lot) of backing behind the teacher’s warning about Kageyama’s dismal grade.

While you flipped through A Midsummer Night’s Dream, you would catch the all-too-familiar confusion on his face - it was written on his features so blatantly that it was almost comical, as if taken straight out of a shonen manga.

“You know if you’re stuck you can ask me for help.”

A slight scowl greeted you over the hedge of pages he had been burying himself in, followed by a biting, “Who said I need help?”

You could only roll your eyes in return.

“Please drop the prideful act. You've been glazing over the same page for about twenty minutes now."

After a few seconds of grumbling did he finally comply, and with your explanations, his bookmark was now comfortably sandwiched between the double-digit page numbers right as the bell rang. You hummed in satisfaction before returning your desk to your original spot, expecting him to rush out along with everyone else - so to turn around and see him still standing there was a bit of a surprise.

“Did you still need help with the last few lines?” You settled on asking, not really wanting to plague your break with work but offering nonetheless. Thankfully, he shot a look of disdain at the play as he stuffed it away haphazardly in his bag.

“No, I just wanted to,” he trailed off a bit, the tinge of red on his ears an out-of-character detail you decided not to comment on, “to say thanks, I guess.”

You smiled softly at the unexpected gesture of appreciation before giving him a teasing nudge which he stiffened slightly at.

“Well, I can’t have you bringing down my mark now can I?”

“Nevermind, I take it back.”

“Too bad, I have those words of gratitude stored nicely in my hippocampus already.”

From there, tutoring sessions with Kageyama became the norm, with you sometimes asking about his volleyball team after he had let slip that you were a better teacher than Tsukishima (something you would be sure to smugly share if you ever met the infamous middle blocker).

By the end of the month, all of the hard work - and a couple of all-nighters due to procrastination - brought forth an A as you had promised.

Even your relentless teasing, varying between “I told you so!” to “You owe me at least three meat buns now” which were all met with an annoyed “Shut up”was not enough to dim the smile he tried to hide.

— High tide

With the force of nature, the tide rose without warning; from goodnight texts to confessing to the first “I love you” uttered shyly between shameless souls, neither of you was sure where things began, but found comfort in such liberating chaos.

In times where he needed to be held, you were there, and the insecurities you would hide, he would turn beautiful. And today happened to be a day for both as you stared absentmindedly at his bedroom ceiling.

“Hey Tobio, what’s your take on soulmates?”

“We’ve been together for almost a year now, what do you think?” he put his phone down and turned towards you, “I could care less about soulmates or whatever else is worrying you enough to make your overthinking go into overdrive.”

“Rude, have some respect, it’s my profession after all,” you shoved him playfully as he snorted in reply, “It’s just... If your string ever appeared, wouldn't you rather-”

“Listen Y/n, did you know that I’m scared of dying but I’m even more terrified of the thought of living without you? I could never and don’t ever want to replace you. People can talk all they want, if I could find a love like ours without something as stupid as a piece of string then I don’t need a soulmate.”

“Really?”

With a flick to your forehead, he huffed in fake exasperation. “Really.”

“Huh, who knew you could be so romantic.”

“It's not romantic, I'm just being honest, idiot.”

“You sure could make do with some more lessons on manners and social tact. It's too bad you can't pick up on those as well as volleyball drills.”

Before he could retaliate, you enveloped him in a familiar embrace, burrowing your face into the large hoodie he donned.

It was effortless, his company.

— Ebbing away

But it wasn’t all romantic.

You fiddled with your phone as you waited for any sign that Kageyama had seen your messages, the pack of meat buns you had bought on a whim no longer letting off their fragrant steam. You knew he had an important match coming up against Seijoh, that he had to prove himself, that he lives hungrily and foolishly like no other. But his missing presence went beyond volleyball practice, keeping his distance from you even when he was right by your side.

Why am I stuck reminiscing about the past when we still have each other?

Why does every step I take towards him feel as if I’m only drawing myself farther away from him?

A carousel of rhetorical questions spun around your head as you stopped your slow pace towards Karasuno. You were not blind; you knew the rumours and dirty looks from your classmates were not something anyone could be immune to, that he tried his best to spend less time around you at school. The only conclusion you could reach was that he was ashamed: either of you, or the fact that he had begun to see his red string and could not bring himself to face you.

Ignoring the urge to let yourself cry, you glanced down at your phone once more, 8:30PM flashed across your eyes, followed by your empty notifications. There was no way he’d still be practicing at the school now and even if he was, you doubted he would be happy to see you. Maybe - no, definitely - it would be better to head home, and maybe stop by the convenience store you had bought the now misshapen meat buns from to get some tea and call it a night.

If only fate did not reciprocate your hatred towards it.

Stepping into the small store, the first person you are greeted with is none other than Kageyama Tobio. The whole situation was like a fever dream, and you would do anything to be able to let out a laugh and have him call you weird all over again. But all you could bring yourself to do was blearily stare at him.

He turned around quickly, as if not wanting to be caught before ushering you outside. “Y/n? Why are you here?” he hissed, a stiffness that he had recently adopted to his body language that you were now all too familiar with.

“What? Am I not allowed to go into any and all convenience stores I please?” You challenged, a part of you waiting for him to care enough to see how tired you were, to actually look you in the eyes for the first time in weeks.

He did not, opting to turn his head towards the door again.

“It’s not that, it’s just-”

“Just what? Tobio, what is up with you lately?” A pause ensued, broken by a small hiccup as your eyes dampened - God, how much more pathetic could you get than crying in front of some dingy convenience store - “Do you even love me anymore?”

How odd. You thought that by finally uttering the final question that had been dancing around your mind free to the world, you would feel better. That he would reassure you, as he always had.

Not that he would at last meet your gaze, grabbing your hand to look at the red string wrapped around your ring finger.

The taste of tears and Kageyama’s eyes as blue as the Atlantic all felt miles away from you as an orange-haired boy stepped out of the store, his mouth dropping into an o-shape when he saw that his string led to you, a disheveled mess arguing with his teammate.

“Kageyama…You knew? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because I didn’t want to face the reality of it all. Because I was afraid of losing you.”

“But I wouldn’t leave you-”

“I know you wouldn’t but you should!” Kageyama’s furrowed brows, once a quirk of his that you were fond of, now elicited a sick turmoil in your stomach, “You have to. Please.”

You wanted to yell at him, let the blood pour out of any and all raw words of anger and hurt.

Who was he to decide what was good for you, to throw you at some boy you never met before, to give up?

Then again, you could never say you would not have done the same for him if you knew he had found his soulmate despite the sweet words he had told you so long ago.

So you let yourself go. For his sake.

[bokunoheroanalysisforthefuture]

Alright, and I am back with another update! But first, some stuff a friend noticed in the first few pages and mentioned to me that I didn’t take in when I went over them on my own the first time:

The park they’re in as kids is pretty close to the apartment complex Izuku and his mom live in! Considering that said apartment complex is right there in the background. Which probably isn’t a huge thing, but a neat thing to note.

The age these kids manifest their quirks at seems to be more preteen / teenage years, though I don’t know whether that’s just because it is later activation or because there were (subtle) quirks before that, with the glowing baby just being the one that had people sit up and realize something was actually going on.

Endeavor ad! And it has the time of that event that day, too - 8:14 AM! I wonder what he’s advertising… or perhaps it’s a news report? An interview of some kind? It might just be a ‘breaking news, we got Endeavor on our channel’ sort of thing. The only part that I can read is the first three katakana for the biggest text, which is ‘E-n-de’ and matches the wiki’s katakana for ‘Endeavor’. If anyone can get a good enough look at the smaller text in order to tell me what the rest says, I would appreciate it!

Just a few things, but obviously I need to up my observation game if I want to catch all this stuff!

[No. 1 - Midoriya Izuku: Origin]

So now we’re at Aldera / Orudera Junior High, with Izuku’s class being in their last year before high school. Since Japan’s schools start on the second week of April, we know this has to be that first week of school, because Katsuki’s still 14 and his birthday is April 20th, which would almost always be the third week of April / second week of school. 

What is that writing stance. You are going to have an old man’s back by the time you graduate high school. I mean, I wouldn’t know anything about that personally, cough cough…

Anyways! We get a look at Izuku’s class and their quirks, and what a collection. Also, with an attitude like that, no wonder this school is seen as bad, like, what the fuck dude. Not exactly a competent homeroom teacher, are you?

The ones that I can see, from leftmost row to rightmost row, are [1] floating hair, stretchy fingers, dark matter, [2] smokey arms, spike fists, stretchy eyes, frog throat, some sort of flash/illumination quirk, [3] rocky body, ???, stretchy neck, flamethrower arms, extra arms, [4] sharp hair, big chompers, wedge face, [quirkless], mouth face (seen in the next panel and holy FUCK new sleep paralysis demon), [5] horns, telekinesis, [explosion], buff bod, ???, [6] wind control, ???

WHY.

But yeah, this also establishes the first rule of ‘don’t use quirks in school’ thing that… also gets promptly ignored the several other times we see stuff set in this school. Which, what a shock, people sort of sliding around inconvenient rules.

Anyways, Katsuki has proven that he hasn’t changed since those first few childhood panels way back (checks) ten pages ago. And Izuku is being… very shy and trying to avoid drawing attention. But no shaking, particularly, just… wallflower mode, more like.

But yeah, Katsuki is not exactly on great terms with the rest of the class, who are rightfully pissed off at him treating them rudely and calling them extras. Though honestly, I’m surprised that they’re surprised he’s aiming for UA, it’s not like he wouldn’t have been obvious about that for, like, years at this point. You’d think they’d all roll their eyes and be like ‘yeah yeah we’ve heard this spiel before’ or something. IDK.

Oh man, and Izuku already KNOWS what’s coming, look at how he’s hiding his face!

Katsuki is, of course, Fucking Extra and hops on his desk, and gets right into bragging, where, AGAIN, this should have been stuff this class has known about for ages, why are they so shocked?? And huh, interesting, he’s not only interested in surpassing All Might, but also in being one of the richest people in the world. Wow, I cannot even with him, especially knowing he lives in this house in particular:

Which, it should be clear, is an EXPENSIVE lifestyle when most families live in modest apartments because of space being so valuable in Japan. 

God this is a fantastic image. I wanna frame it on a wall somewhere. Hori managed to convey all the emotions in one face and I admire the man for it. 

With the whole class laughing, there’s a thing I want to note that fandom seems to not pay attention to: they note that Izuku gets good grades! I’ve seen fics that basically have him forced to sabotage his own grades to avoid getting backlash, but like… no, I don’t think that’s actually a thing. 

[Also an aside, we finally see one more class quirk, which seems to be some sort of bulked up arm? It looks a bit like mummy bandages, as far as I can tell.]

Izuku gets into defending himself, saying there’s no precedent, but he IS defending himself against them, so again, he’s not cowering as much as some people seem to think he does based on fics, and clearly he’s still willing to stand up for himself to some degree. 

...then of course, Katsuki blows up Izuku’s desk and sends Izuku sprawling. And is pissed that Izuku apparently thinks he, who is quirkless, can somehow be on the same level as Katsuki. Izuku swears up and down that it’s not about Katsuki, that he just really wants to try, and this somehow pisses Katsuki off even more. 

I want you all to remember this image - save it on your computers, bookmark this post, whatever you need to do. We’ll come back to it in, oh (checks watch) about 284 chapters. Or maybe sooner in a separate post where I can put it under read more and avoid spoiling people more than this does. Because DAMN can I gush on this moment.

Anyways, we have a change of scene, right after noon, with a thief with a sludge transformation and,,,,,,,, legs and pants,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Where the fuck did those pants go, sir. Sir. What the fuck, sir.

Also, we get our first meeting with the OG dad, the sunflower man himself, who blooms into 255 kilos of muscle in one panel. Also, man I forgot about the fucking giraffe neck Hori used to draw him with, holy heck, why are you so l o n g.

L O N G.

...right, anyways, back to the school, which is apparently over for the day. The rest of the class is heading out, and Izuku’s back to his chipper self, even humming a happy note as he grabs his notebook-

Before Katsuki nabs it from his hands. There are a few people who’ve hung back who notice the title and pick fun at izuku, so I guess Izuku actually… doesn’t talk about his desire to be a hero that much in middle school, if the others are all so surprised about it. He apparently doesn’t even make his notebooks obvious to them, since this is the first time any of them seem to be seeing it. Which I mean, it makes sense if the class will tease him for it, but like. Even with Katsuki stealing the book, Izuku’s not super panicked or having a nervous breakdown.

But yeah, Katsuki just blasts the book, but! It’s just the cover singed (and edges) when we know he could have demolished that book entirely. Again, he’s definitely being a bully and a jerk here, but he’s got way more self-control than fandom likes to assume. 

Izuku’s upset because of his damaged notebook, and Katsuki just huffs and throws it out the window while saying he’s gonna be the only kid from Aldera to go to UA. And Izuku, EVEN WHILE STRESSING, thinks of him as vain for thinking that way! That’s not the first thought of someone too terrified to do anything.

Edit: As pointed out to me in [this post], it was Katsuki’s crony who was thinking of him as vain, not Izuku. My bad!

Also note the lack of damage to Izuku’s school uniform. I know I’ve seen fics where there’s a hole made and a burn scar left that Izuku has to tend to, but Katsuki, again, has not directly used his quirk against Izuku. We’ve never seen it, just the smoke and flash used for intimidation. I’m getting more and more confident that Katsuki has never actually used his quirk against a person, which I’m probably gonna get a bit more into during the battle training in a few chapters.

But yeah, the cronies / extras basically call Izuku lame and that he can’t face reality. And then we get this scene:

That’s not the face of someone afraid. That’s Izuku’s determined face.

Izuku is about to stand up to Katsuki again. The way he always has, the way he always will. There has never been a point in the series where Izuku has NOT stood up to Katsuki when he feels it matters, and that’s part of the reason Katsuki is so pissed with him every time he does - because Izuku REFUSES to see his place! Not once!

(Please, for the love of god, respect the Izuku who didn’t need a quirk to stand up to others. Who isn’t ‘broken’ or ‘terrified’ of Katsuki or anything like that. He’s a stubborn kid and we Stan That.)

Izuku, however, is not confident enough in this situation to want to press the issue, so he relents and says nothing when Katsuki prods him to escalate things. And then we immediately get to the ‘you idiot, don’t fucking suicide bait!’ but you can tell it’s been a stressful few moments for him. 

So yeah, the summary of this section is ‘Izuku is not an uwu suffering babey, and Katsuki is way more restrained than people seem to think.’ 

I’m cutting it off here since, again, we got a lot of info and character examination, and honestly this whole chapter is a long ass one (55 pages!!!!) and it’s establishing the entire setting from the ground up. And honestly, I’m just vibing in being Right about how I’ve been viewing the characters at the start of the series… even if i am guilty of sometimes playing with fanon for my own means…

Still, this is fun! Hopefully y’all are having fun too!

[jisungsmochi]

loved you first - park jisung

based off the song by one direction (kings) - word count: 3.3k 

idk y’all my heart kinda hurt writing this oops 

//

she was always going to be his first love. and he was always going to be hers. but sometimes, your first love doesn’t always end up being your last.

//

Girl it should be me,

Driving to your house,

Knocking your door,

Kissing you on the mouth

“jisung! you suck at this game” you teased the boy from across the room as you were both in a competitive game of mario kart. jisung just rolls his eyes, trying to come up with a witty comment. but he was interrupted by your doorbell echoing through the house. you immediately paused the game to answer the door, jisung’s eyes following your movements. as you swung the door open, you squealed loudly, scaring jisung.

“jenoooo” you cooed at your boyfriend, embracing him by wrapping your legs around his tall figure. jeno kissed you in return, tightening the hug. jisung sat there before coughing, trying to gain your attention.

“hey jisung” jeno greeted, walking into the living room and plopping himself on the couch. jisung couldn’t help but glare, he tried to stop himself before you noticed.

“hi jeno, i’m uh i’m gonna go home now, my mum needs something. see you guys later” jisung hurriedly makes his way out of your house, causing you to give him a concerned look as he hopped on his bike and made his way home.

‘you’re an idiot, jisung’ he mumbled to himself.

holding on your hand,

dancing in the dark,

cause i was the only one who loved you from the start

you planned a small celebration for jeno’s birthday, at this local bar and karaoke place. jisung knew you only invited him for the sake of it, not because he and jeno were even remotely friends. but jisung would have done anything for you. even if it meant, helping blow up balloons for your boyfriend who he really couldn’t care less about.

“jisung, don’t waste your breath! you could pass out!” you chuckle, pulling the balloons away from him. every time you smiled at him; he swore time stopped.

“whatever you say!” jisung raises his arms in defeat,

“guys! he’s coming soon!” donghyuck announced, causing everyone to scramble to their hiding places. jisung crouched next to you, behind one of the plush sofas. he was so close to you; he could feel your breath fanning his cheek. you were nervously awaiting jeno’s entrance, jisung senses your nerves and held onto your hand, giving it a small squeeze.

“you did a good job, he is gonna love it” your best friend assured you, making you nod in affirmation, giving his hand a small squeeze back. a simple gesture such as that, had jisung in the palm of your hand.

you both heard jaemin and jeno’s laughter, sensing it was time for the surprise. as the lights switched on, everyone jumped from their positions, except for jisung.

“SURPRISE” they all yelled in unison. you ran to your boyfriend, pulling him in for another embrace, as jisung watched on again. it never got easier for him. for the rest of the night, he watched as you and jeno danced in the dark, lights strobing around the both of you, as if no one was around. the way he held you close to him, like you were the only one he saw. jisung’s heart stung at the sight in front of him, for he was the one who loved you first.

But now when I see you with him it

Tears my world apart

jisung was sitting at his usual lunch table when chenle approaches him.

“what’s up with you?” his friend questions, taking a bite of his sandwich.

“what do you mean?” jisung fires back, glaring over at you and jeno seated under a large tree.

“i mean, why have you been such a downer lately?” chenle speaks up, eyes flickering to what the younger boy was previously looking at, “ah never mind”

“how can she be with someone like him? i mean he- he’s just- “

“perfect?” chenle finished, causing jisung to whip his head to face him.

“admit it jisung, he treats her so well. he’s never been rude or mean to you, ever. and he does care about her” chenle tried his best to make jisung understand how illogical he was being. as much as jisung hated to admit it, everything he said was true. jeno wasn’t a terrible person, not like how jisung wanted him to be. jeno was kind, gentle and caring towards you. which made jisung even more frustrated.

“chenle it hurts” jisung quietly mutters, not sure if the other boy would hear him. chenle sighs, giving him a small pat on the back before speaking,

“i know it does. but she’s happy, isn’t she? try to be happy for her okay? she loves you. maybe not in the way you want, but sometimes we can’t be so selfish” jisung holds back his sobs, nodding at his words.

jisung couldn’t bear to see you two together, but he knew he’d rather have you in his life as just a friend, than not have you in it at all.

Because,

I've been waiting

All this time to finally say it

But now I see your heart's been taken

And nothing could be worse

Baby, I loved you first.

“mum, i don’t need you to walk to me into school! i’m in the seventh grade now!” you grumble as your mother accompanied you on your first day.

“oh, don’t be silly! you’re not that grown yet” she joked, pulling you along with her into the assembly hall. as you stumbled into the huge hall, you noticed a boy, whose mother was also attached to his hip, guiding him through the crowd. you chuckled to yourself at how awkward he looked. his socks up to his knees and his hair parted in the middle. by chance, your mothers decided to sit near to each other, having you and jisung fill the two spaces between them. you sat down, awkwardly looking around at the other students. jisung sat, hands folded in his lap, staring at the ground.

“hi there, i’m y/n” you spoke up, causing him to face you. your mothers were too caught up on the hustle and bustle of the assembly.

“i’m jisung” he answered back. you nodded, unsure of what to say.

“do you want to go to the basketball court? i saw some other students there, i don’t think we are even meant to pay attention to this assembly” you mumble, watching as the boy nodded, turning to ask his mum if he could leave, in which she agreed. your mother shooed you, too invested in listening to the dance program coordinator speak. you and jisung giggle as you run outside.

you could say that was the moment you fell in love with park jisung. but you were quite too young to know what love was just yet.

it wasn’t until the following year, when jisung received multiple roses form different girls for valentine’s day, that you wanted to express how you felt. you held your rose for him, in your hand, watching as jisung walked around with an entire bouquet. you sighed, shoving the rose into your backpack. you had attached a note with a cheesy pick up line,

“you rock my world” with a picture of dwayne the rock johnson pasted on it.

park jisung was always going to be too good for you.

jisung anxiously waited outside of your last period classroom that day, holding a small bear keychain he made the night before, along with his own written note. he was disappointed to see that you had practically ran right past him, in order to catch the bus home. jisung never ended up giving you that gift, which he would regret in the years to come.

the thing with you and jisung, was that feelings between you both were never a taboo topic. you often talked about failing in love, having an epic love story that would be magical. but you were kids, having never experienced love firsthand. all this time spent waiting for the other to make a move, ultimately ended up with you both never confessing your feelings.

this continued on another year later. you were truly well and done, with the idea of falling for your best friend. you convinced yourself it was just another cliché trope you desperately yearned for in your life.

so, as you made the decision to move past your feelings for park jisung, he was not such a fan of the idea.

he noticed how you would let your hair down more often, spray perfume throughout the day and constantly check your makeup on your phone camera. it wasn’t his position to comment on your newfound interest in your appearance, he couldn’t help but notice how more guys started talking to you. he felt left out at times, when you’d go to another party without him, or go have lunch with another group. but jisung saw how happy you were, who was he to prevent you from that?

Had my chances

Could've been where he is standing

That's what hurts the most,

Girl, I came so close

But now you'll never know

Baby, I loved you first

jisung knew he already had chances to confess to you. he could have chosen to chase you down on valentine’s day to give you the keychain. he could have showed up to your house and outright said it. he could have done it at your 15th birthday party, after he gave you your first kiss.  

“let’s play truth or dare!” your friend jisoo suggested, as everyone gathered in a circle. you sat next to jisung, with jisoo on your other side. she ended up using a random generator online since you were all innocent children, with no concept of how to use the game to your advantage.

it was jisung’s turn, he chose dare.

“kiss the person beside you” jisoo read aloud, causing jisung to whip his head between you and chenle. chenle’s eyes were practically screaming for jisung to not get any closer to him. luckily jisung took the hint, turning to face you.

“jisung you don’t have to! you can choose another dare inst-“

jisung’s lips met yours, taking you by surprise. everyone’s mouths widened, not expecting him to go through with it. jisung pulled away slowly, watching as your cheeks flushed bright pink. the game continued on, but your heart was beating so fast. god dammit park jisung.

prior to that night, you asked jisung to sleepover, not knowing what would have gone down between you both.

“hey, uh if it’s gonna be awkward, i can just sleep in the living room instead. i should have asked you if i could kiss you, i’m sorry” jisung apologised, holding his pillow and blanket in his arms. you shook your head,

“n-no you can sleep with me as usual. but yeah, it was just a surprise, that’s all” you assured him, watching as he placed his pillow next to yours and folded the blanket to place on your bedroom floor.

“i don’t want things to be weird between us. it was just a kiss” jisung mumbled as you both tucked yourselves in bed.

“it was my first kiss, jisung” you looked at him, his face directly in front of yours. you couldn’t help but stare into his glistening eyes.

“i know” he whispered, almost afraid to admit that he had just been your first kiss.

jisung didn’t know why he couldn’t have just confessed at that very moment. but he knew he had used up all his chances.

Girl, it should be me

Calling on your phone

Saying you're the one, and that I'll never let you go

I never understood, what love was really like,

But I felt it for the first time looking in your eyes

“jisung, you don’t mind leaving now, do you? jeno wants to facetime me soon! we can finish studying tomorrow” you sorrowfully explained to your best friend. jisung just nodded, giving you a side hug before leaving your house. he hopped on his bike before starting to pedal, remembering the days where you and he would ride your bikes together to some random park. he enjoyed hearing your laughter every time you both were going down a hill, he liked watching your hair fly all sorts of places from the wind. he fully believed that his heart was content with having you by his side for as long as you lived. until, you met lee jeno.

it was valentine’s day, once again, you and jisung now were seventeen years old. ever since jisung kissed you, you debated your feelings for him. jisung was very reserved, and never the one to express how he felt. it often made you frustrated at times, especially when all you wanted from him was an indication of how he felt towards you.

you stumbled upon a rose taped to your locker. you brushed it off, thinking that jisung or chenle has put it there to make you smile. you carefully took the rose down, noticing there was a small piece of paper wrapped around the stem. surely, the boys weren’t fully capable of something with so much effort. you opened the note, reading to yourself,

‘happy valentine’s day! i hope this made you smile! - j’

your heart was rapidly beating. you noticed the initial, ‘j’. could it have been jisung? you needed to find out, so you walked up to him during your lunch break. you made sure to hold the rose right in front of you, hoping he would take the hint to just confess to your face.

‘hey y/n, oh you got a rose?’ jisung questioned, nibbling on his chicken wing.

“yeah i did, not sure who it’s from though” you tried to lead him on, watching as he was still focused on eating. you sighed, sitting down next to him.

“is there something you wanna tell me, jisung?” you tried to get any sort of response from him,

“not really, hey can you pass me your wings if you’re not gonna have them?” the boy continued chewing. you huffed in defeat, handing him your chicken wings. you stared at the note intently,

“ooo who’s the secret admirer?” chenle’s voice perked you up.

“not sure, someone with the initial, J” you shrugged, chenle looked over at jisung,

“jisungie, how sweet of you to confess to y/n!!” chenle chuckled, stopping jisung in his tracks. he nervously coughed before replying,

“it wasn’t me. i didn’t send it” jisung admitted, watching as your face fell. screw park jisung for getting your hopes up.

the rest of the day consisted of you and chenle, investigating the possible admirer.

“you reckon it’s someone in the grade above us?” chenle questions as you both stroll through the halls.

“highly doubt it! i mean, why would an upperclassman go for me?” you shrug, chenle pouts,

“don’t be like that! you’re pretty” you look over at him, raising your eyebrows

“yeah okay that was weird, i meant that, you can get a guy to like you!” he finished. you nodded slowly as you both approached your locker where you saw lee jeno, a well-known basketball player, standing in front of your locker. he had his head down, fiddling with his fingers. chenle’s eyes widened at the possible situation,

“y/n, i swear to god if it was lee jeno, you are one lucky girl” he whispers before rushing off to spy on you from afar. you freeze as you reach your locker, jeno taking notice and faced you.

“h-hi jeno?” it came out more of like a question than a greeting.

“hi, i um i wanted to know if you got my rose” he continued fiddling with his fingers. you had never seen the school’s basketball star so nervous before.

“i did, it was a sweet gesture. i appreciate it a lot” you kindly smile, peering over at chenle who was now joined by jisung. they were both spying, watching every move,

“i’m really glad. i probably should explain more. i think you’re really pretty. and i know we don’t know each other that well but i was hoping i could take you to eat sometime?” jeno looked into your eyes, and you could swear that time froze. he was so gorgeous, his kind eyes that creased into crescent moons, his contagious smile that could never not cheer you up. you looked over at your friends once again, seeing how solemn jisung looked. you tried to shake the image of his face from your mind, focusing on jeno’s confession.

“sure, I’d like to go out with you. we can get to know each other well” you smile, as jeno returns the same expression, only brighter. chenle was practically cheering from the side-lines,

“jisung! can you believe it? she scored a date with lee jeno!” jisung just stood, unable to move. perhaps he was too late.

The first touch

The first kiss

First girl to make me feel like this

Heartbreak

It's killing me

I loved you first, why can't you see?

you and jeno has been dating for around three months now. it didn’t get any easier for jisung, to see you both walk around, holding hands and kissing each other. he was happy for you, what kind of friend would he be if he wasn’t? jeno was the perfect guy for you. he was what you wanted all along. but jisung couldn’t help but imagine what life would be like, if you had chosen him. if he had prevailed his love for you sooner.

jisung often wrote his thoughts down, dedicating a few pages of his journal, for entries about you. he wrote about your first kiss, the first time you hugged him, the first time you had a sleepover. every milestone in your relationship was most likely written in his journal. jisung never wanted to forget the moments he had with you. whether it was in the form of photos and randomly cut videos you two made, or simple notes you passed in class. jisung kept them all. you were the first girl, who made his heart beat out of his chest. you were the first girl who made him feel nervous, worried, angry at times and most of all, the happiest he had been during his youth. although he is not the one for you, at this moment in time, didn’t mean he lost you forever.

no matter the circumstances, how you had wished that you and jisung could have experimented a proper relationship, having him as your best friend was your priority. he was always a sense of stability in your life, someone who would never let you down. he was loyal, kind, overly caring and extremely witty. if you and jeno ever got into an argument, jisung would help out the pieces back together to ensure your relationship didn’t end. he couldn’t bear seeing you hurt, even though he was dying inside. he wanted to wrap you up and kiss your forehead while he tells you everything will be okay. but jisung was never the one to overstep his boundaries. you weren’t his to cuddle and hold for dear life. his heart broke every time he saw you embraced in jeno’s arms. it pained him to see what could have been. he didn’t know how long he would keep his feelings bottled up. but maybe one day, you would hear the words from his mouth, describing how much he adored you. maybe sometime in the future, the universe has a plan for you both. but jisung knew, that one day he would have to move on, no matter how long it took or how much it would hurt. he will always think to himself, if only you had known how much he loved you first, maybe everything would be different.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #451

“taste the waste of their god’s grace & spit your hate upon your young”

Who are you subscribed to on YouTube? A shitload of people. Do you like to go to the farmer's market? Yeah, sure. What will (or was) the color of your wedding dress be? Probably black. What's your favorite melon? I don't really like melons, actually. What was the name of the last pet of yours that died? Teddy. :( When was the last time you wished the day would just get over with? Literally every day. Seriously. It's funny, I dread fighting to sleep at night, but I also just want it to be time to sleep so time will pass. My life is just so fucking boring that I just... wait for something exciting to happen. Name one person you've never had a fight with: Tez. What are you currently listening to? "Sex Metal Barbie" by In This Moment. What would you rather have: cat or dog? I prefer cats. Who is your least favorite person in real life? Probably my sister's husband. Do you ever watch anybody's live stream of... anything, really? I'll sometimes watch live let's plays. Does your house have security cameras? No. If you go grey as you age, would you dye your hair or let it be? I'll be dyeing it. What was the last establishment you stopped going to due to bad service? What happened? I'm not sure. What soundtrack do you listen to the most? Silent Hill 2's, definitely. Was there a family secret you weren’t told about until you were an adult? I don't know if it's really a secret, but I didn't know until this year that my dad did some really dangerous drugs before us kids were born. Do you have an opinion most people you meet seem to disagree with you? Yes. What’s something you like to have many options to choose from? Food, ha ha. Feels great to have a full kitchen after a grocery trip. What’s the strangest decorative object you own? Nothing "strange" to me. What’s a thing you couldn’t imagine doing with your life right now? One biggie is having a baby. I just... could not imagine. My life would plummet. What’s been your proudest moment? Graduating in the top percentile in my high school graduating class. What’s the filthiest non-pornographic movie you’ve seen? Omfg, Sausage Party. That movie was so gross. Do you know anyone who doesn't seem to be fond of animals? Thankfully, no. I don't even think I could befriend someone who doesn't like animals. Are you planning any outings or trips anytime soon? Whereabouts? No. Do you know anyone who has a phobia of a certain animal? Yeah, like me with whale sharks. Is there a particular brand of technology/electronics that you prefer? Not really, no. Is there a singer whose voice gives you goosebumps/chills? Amy Lee's. And is there a singer whose voice you simply can't stand? Yeah, such as Bob Dylan. Are there any authors that are particularly dominant on your bookshelf? Tui T. Sutherland, but only because I read their series Wings of Fire. Have you seen any photographs or videos that made you smile today? I'm sure on Facebook at some point. Which item in your fridge are you most looking forward to consuming? Does the freezer count? If so, this Healthy Choice grilled chicken pesto bowl I have in there. I am like addicted to them. Has anyone you know got into a new relationship lately? I don't know. If you menstruate, do you experience much PMS prior to it? It varies month-to-month. Have you ever had a tattoo covered up or added to? I had my Markiplier tattoo essentially redone by a better artist. I also plan on getting my "ohana" tat covered, as well as my "how rare and beautiful it is to even exist" one (I adore the quote, but it's not an original design, which I don't like having anymore), and I want to move and redesign my "perfectly flawed" one because I want a bigger tattoo in its location. Can you remember the last time you had a sudden change of mind? Yeah; I'm pretty sure I like-like my friend Girt now, something I was never entirely sure about. When was the last time you did something on a whim? *shrug* Were you raised by both of your parents? If not, then who raised you? Well, I guess both, but Dad didn't do a lot of the teaching part about life and stuff. Have you ever began a relationship with someone you knew for less than a week? No. Has one of your friends ever tried to ‘hook you up?’ Yes. Colleen tried that with me and Girt and only succeeded in making us very uncomfortable. She said something I wanted to slap her for that I won't repeat. What is your card game of choice? Magic: The Gathering. What is your favourite books series? I think my favorite series of all time was the Shiloh trilogy. I adored both the books and movies. Do you prefer landmarks or street names when being given directions? You'd better give me landmarks, ha ha. Do you read the prologues in the beginnings of books? Of course. What was your favourite gym class moment? There're such things as GOOD gym memories in school? Do you think that ocean boardwalks are fun? Yes. Do you dread when people ask you to sign their yearbooks? No, I always thought it was very flattering that they even wanted mine. Do you have a favourite Scooby-Doo movie? The Phantom Virus one. I had the video game as a kid, too. Could never beat the damn thing. Do you think it’s cute when toddlers try to run away and fall down? No? I don't like seeing children - or anyone - fall. Do you enjoy listening to your grandparents tell stories of their past? So, this really only happened once, and it was coincidentally the day I learned of her pancreatic cancer, but before Mom told me. I had an assignment to interview someone of an older generation about how various sources of media affected their lives, like the development of TV and such, and she really got into it. It was very interesting to learn about. Do you have a crush on someone? I guess I do idfk. If so... what does his/her name begin with? "D." What attracts you to them? More than anything, the fact he's been there for me without fail. Both single and when I was with Jason and he was interested in me, he's just... been there and has made an effort since high school to be in my life in one way or another. Do they know that you like them? Not anymore, no. We dated for a few months, but I broke up with him because he felt more like my brother, so I would assume he doesn't think I do. Maybe he still is family to me. I really don't know what I feel. If they don't know, why didn't you tell them? I might at some point, idk. We just haven't talked in a while. Name two people that you miss: Jason and Megan. Have you ever seen Titanic? When I was in the hospital, yes. Everyone was crying, lmao. Have you ever swam with dolphins? No, but I would. When was the last time you had a stomachache? Now. Mother Nature finally visited me after three whole fucking months and is v angry. What's going to bed early for you? Like 7:00. Do you want to have a big family in the future? Of pets! Human kids ain't for me. What was the last thing you did that gave you a rush? Hell if I know. Favorite Nicholas Cage movie? Ghost Rider. Have you had your Covid vaccine yet? Which one, if you have? Yes. I got Moderna. If you've had your vaccine, did you experience any side effects? I did on my second dosage. I was OUT of it the day afterwards, but then I was fine. What's the next item of clothing that you intend to buy for yourself? I need new bras badly. What Facebook groups have you found the most helpful? It's called "Not Just A Pet Rock (Python regius)" and is a group for advanced ball python husbandry. It is very informative, but I will say there is a SHITLOAD of very rude elitists. Do you like your butt? Why or why not? NO because it's a PANCAKE and I want CAKE. Have you ever personally been a victim of homophobia? I personally think so. When Sara visited and we were trying to go to my older sister's so she especially could meet her, Ash entirely ignored Mom's messages. I know her homophobic husband well enough to nearly be able to guarantee he didn't want us coming over because the kids "don't need to see that." Ash kinda does what Nick says, so... you know. Do you think you’d be happier if you had a pet? I know I'm happier with pets. Who was the last person you went on a date with? Sara. Were you ever hospitalized as a little kid? No. What’s your favorite way to curl your hair? It's too short to do that. At what age did you start swearing? However old I was in 7th grade. What is something you physically can’t do? Clean up vomit lkdsjal;sdkjfa;lkwd. I can't clean up my pet's or even my own. I literally can't. My mom has to. What do like better, apples or oranges? Apples. I don't like oranges. Around the holidays, do you hope for snow? Yes!!! What are your top two favorite bands? Ozzy Osbourne and Metallica. How many people do you 100% trust? Like two. Maybe. Do you care what others think about you? Way too much. Has anyone ever called you a bitch? My grandmother has. Did you watch Teletubbies when you were younger? Omg yes, I was obsessed. Do you have any licenses other than your driver's license? I don't even have that. Could you live the rest of your life without eating meat? No. Not because I don't want to, because I do, but I would have an extreme protein deficit if I did that. Besides meat, I don't like enough protein-rich foods. Have you ever had a rolling backpack? Yes. Did you make any money today? I haven't made any money in a very, very long time. I'm only ever paid when someone hires me to take pictures for them. What was the highest place you've ever jumped from? I don't know. Definitely not very high. Have you ever gone swimming in a river? Yes. What was the last souvenir someone got you? I have zero clue. Do you have a favorite remix of a song? Hm. Perhaps this techno-y remix of "Psychosocial" by Slipknot. I don't know for sure, though. What do you think is the most saddest sounding instrument? Either the violin or piano. Do you really pay attention to the ratings on movies? Nope. Do you have a favorite species of wild cat (tiger/lion/cougar/etc.)? Probably clouded leopards aesthetics, but I think lions overall. If you had $500,000, what would you do with it? Pay off school debt as well as help Mom with various financial issues, buy new glasses, buy Mom and I a new house and car, get Venus a great tank with all the optimal supplies, get LOADS of tattoos, donate to various charities, adopt a few specific pets, travel to Yellowstone, get laser hair removal on my legs and teeth whitening... There are a lot of possibilities. Did the last person you touched lips with have a kid? Just scaly ones. :') "First loves are never really over." Is this true for you? Yeeeep... Did you like Michael Jackson before he died? I didn't really have an opinion on him. I know/like a couple songs, sure. What are some things that would make you break up with someone? If they became abusive, started doing drugs, acted arrogantly, didn't understand my mental conditions and were unwilling to be emotionally supportive, stuff like that. What was the worst breakup you've ever had? Ha, the one with Jason. For. Fucking. Sure.

[merskrat]

I’m literally living in such a state of anticipation just waiting to see what is going to come of this situation with my dad. He asked me to reach out to my brother, who is 16, and made it sound like everyone in the family has ignored him and that’s the reason he doesn’t want to visit us anymore. That didn’t really ring true to me, because I know that once my grandmother had to physically take his tablet away from him and force him to come out of his room just to get him to interact with the family just the smallest amount. I talked to my cousin, who I would trust with my life, about it and what he said basically boiled down to “I have been trying to befriend him for literal years, but he is so rude and so uninterested in doing anything other than playing games on his tablet that I gave up a long time ago.” I guess once my grandfather asked him if he wanted to help him feed the birds and my brother was like “why would I want to do that?” I emailed my dad because I didn’t want to get emotional about this over the phone, and told him about how blatantly disrespectful my brother is to all of us and how confused I was that he had been raised so differently than me—allowed to completely isolate himself by staring at a screen all day when I wasn’t even allowed to have a gameboy and was allowed about three hours of computer time a week. My brother has never been made to leave his (very narrow) comfort zone like I was. I performed musically, took sailing lessons, horseback riding lessons, etc. I was not given the option to back out of these activities even if I had wanted to, and I am a better person for not being allowed to isolate myself in my room reading books.

This made me delve into my stepmother and her emotional abuse, how I feel that she has turned my brother against our family because that is what she tried to do with me when I was a kid. I remember finally getting really upset about what she was saying about my grandparents and her response was that she “should have known I wasn’t mature enough for adult conversations.” A LOT of repressed memories are coming to the surface. How she said that my sister was going to be a trophy wife when she grew up...she was five. How she got so angry when I threw up during Sunday school once, even though it was in the bathroom, and I cleaned it up and went back to she wouldn’t miss the service. How when I asked her, in tears, for help with my OCD and she called me a hypochondriac and a liar and told me to go to my room. I guess the reason she “knew” I was lying is because once I complained about chest pain and when a doctor listened to my heart and said nothing was wrong they just...never followed up. Now I recognize that I was having chest pain from anxiety. I told my dad about how my basic needs were not being met when he was away during the week working. My stepmother never gave me lunch money, and if she did it was never more than a dollar left on the table, and I wasn’t allowed to wake her up in the morning under any circumstances. My friends had to buy me food and generally took turns getting me lunch, until the principal caught on and asked me if everything was ok at home. I lied to cover for her because I knew that I would be in trouble if the school called. She adopted me when I was ten, but would only be in my life for three more years after that. Everything was fine between us the summer after eighth grade and I happily went to the island to stay with my grandparents for the summer and to see my friends. My dad went back up for the weekend like he always did, and found that my stepmom had taken her car, the cats, all of her stuff, and my infant brother half way across the country to Minnesota. So he went, trying to save his marriage, and I stayed, honestly happy to be left behind and not having to be the new kid two years in a row. She completely cut off contact with me.

I also told my dad about the blog post I found later that year, written by her and read by many people in the community in which I lived, about how difficult it was for her to have a mentally ill daughter. I find it really interesting that my brother is so mentally ill that he can barely function, but she has not taken to the Internet to make his mental illnesses known to his community and to try to garner sympathy. I asked him to please imagine for a second how that made me feel to find that and read it.

It seemed incredibly obvious to everyone in our family that once she had her own biological child that she didn’t feel the need to continue to have a relationship with the adopted one, and even maybe that she manipulated the situation to make sure that it would just be the three of them from that point on. My brother was only a year old when she took off, and she left less than a week after I went to the island. As a child I didn’t want to say this out loud to anyone. I didn’t want to risk sounding jealous, insecure, immature, etc. But as an adult I don’t mind saying it, because that’s what happened. It honestly just shows how truly manipulated my thoughts were, to the point that I didn’t even want to acknowledge the reality of the situation, for fear of it being spun to make *me* look bad/more mentally ill.

He has said that both of them are waiting for me to make the first move in reestablishing a relationship. He said that my brother doesn’t want to switch rooms in their house because of the mural I painted on his wall. I reminded him that she has always been the one who established whether or not a relationship existed. At the end of what basically ended up being a manifesto of all of the ways she had torn our family apart, I said that I might be willing to reestablish contact with her if she started to take accountability and go to therapy. I also said that I would try to reach out to my brother but that it might be difficult for us to have a connection because he is almost an adult, is set in his habits, and if I’m right, she has been filling his head with awful things about our family like she did with me when I was a child, the only difference being that he has been under her influence for much longer and that she actually was able to isolate him from us, and use emotional incest to manipulate him into believing whatever she wanted him to believe (I did not use that term in the email to my dad because I know it would immediately make him, or anyone really, defensive because of how disgusting it sounds.)

My dad couldn’t email me back from his tablet but texted me what basically amounted to “I’m sorry I haven’t been a better parent. You have given me a lot to think about.” I have never felt so awful and so validated at the same time. He probably went back to their house from the island (where he works) last night, and I’m just wondering what is going to happen, if she is going to manage to manipulate her way out of any responsibility once again. My grandmother warned me not to criticize my brother if I cared about my relationship with my dad. I really felt all of this needed to be said though. My dad is away from his son during the week, so god only knows what she says and does during all that time that he is away. When he used to bring my brother to the island, he would bring him during the week and go to work, so he has no idea of how my brother interacts/doesn’t interact with us. I don’t know, I don’t know how she could spin any of this to make herself look good.

I told him, “I want you to be happy,” and he responded “I’m happy that you’re doing so well.” Idk, that kind of just broke my heart because it sounds like he just feels that happiness is off the table for him at this point. Every time we talk he’s like “I wanted to go do x but your mother and brother don’t want to, so we’re not.” And it just makes me sad af because I remember how much fun we used to have going to Maine, the Renaissance fair, tours of caverns, the beach, etc, and his wife and child would rather stare at a screen than go do something fun with him. Like we didn’t have a ton of money growing up and I’m sure they still don’t, but what money my dad did make he spent on experiences for us as a family.

So yeah...just waiting to see what’s gonna happen now.

[obxlife]

In Need of Help (Pope x Reader)

A/N: Okay, so I had this idea for Pope and I knew I had to write it! I just feel like it’s very sweet and soft and idk. Plus, it has an enemy to lovers trope, which I personally love. Also, the valedictorian and salutatorian at my school are also dating and I just got that idea from them lol.

Word Count: 3,513

Request: -

Summary: Pope finds himself with some trouble regarding his scholarship work, and he knows he can’t turn to his friends for this. Instead, he sucks up his pride and turns to you, the runner up for the Lucas T Vanderhorst Merit Scholarship. Oh, and his enemy regarding academics. 

Warnings: Mild swearing.

IN NEED OF HELP

Pope was in trouble. Not serious trouble like JJ regarding his dad or John B in relation to the DCS and basically being homeless. No, Pope was in trouble in a way that may almost seem absurd. 

He was struggling with his goddamn scholarship essay. And the worst part of it all was that he had technically already won the scholarship. 

See, this was just a follow-up essay he had to do to ensure he was not going to be ripped apart from the opportunity of actually getting the scholarship. And it had been the hardest essay he had to write. Mainly because it asked for more of a story instead of focusing on a scientific topic, and Pope had always struggled with that. 

The paper he was writing his draft on was filled with eraser marks and little doodles around the edges. Most of the doodles were of things he could see. His eraser, his pinky finger, his cup of water on his desk. There was only one he wasn’t really sure why he had drawn. It was the one object that was not in the room with him at that instant, and the worst part of it all was that he truly hated it. What had he drawn? You. 

For some reason, Pope had drawn you onto the edge of his paper. He didn’t really understand why he had because, as mentioned before, he hated you with a passion that ran so deep in his veins it was a part of who he was. Pope could not be himself if he didn’t hate you, and it was just the same for you. You couldn’t be yourself if you didn’t hate Pope.

Pope began to rub his pencil over the small drawing of your face, wanting nothing more than to get you out of his head. He hated that he had drawn you of al people, and he hated how stuck he was on this stupid essay.

Pope hadn’t realized how much force he was using to press his pencil into the paper until he ripped it. Throwing his pencil down, Pope sighed and pressed his hands to his head, stretching in his seat. 

“That’s it,” he said to himself before grabbing the papers from his desk, his pencil, his eraser, and his pencil sharpener into his backpack. He then grabbed the folder that had arrived through the mail and gently took it into his hands. Pope turned outside of his room and headed towards the shop in front of his house.

His father was behind the counter, checking an old lady out.

“Dad,” Pope called out to him from the door. “I’m heading out.”

The older man froze. He thought he had told his son to work on his scholarship. “I thought I told you to work on your scholarship. Now you know I don’t want you slacking around -”

“I know, I know,” Pope told him. “I just need to clear my head. I’m going over to John B to see if my friends can help.”

“Look here, boy,” Heyward called out to his son while pointing his finger out. Pope stood at the door, on hand already pushing it open. “What are your friends going to help with? They’re all a bunch of good-for-nothings.”

Pope sighed, only shaking his head and turning towards the outside, throwing a “Later, Pops” over his shoulder. The hot afternoon air made Pope’s body break into a sweat, but Pope didn’t mind as he headed deeper into the Cut towards John B’s fishing shack. 

The Chateau stood mighty and tall before the marsh and surrounding it were Pope’s friends. JJ was laying across the hammock sipping on a beer and a joint in his hand while Kie lay opposite of him, playing the ukelele. John B was nowhere to be seen, which meant he was probably inside.

“Hey, guys,” the dark-haired boy called out to the pair. He smiled as he saluted them with their usual handshake before taking a seat in one of the broken-down chairs. Pope set his backpack on the ground, careful not to fold the papers in his hands.

“What you got there, Pope?” JJ asked curiously. Pope knew what he held in his hands would not interest JJ, so he told the boy straight out what it was.

“Scholarship stuff.”

Indeed, JJ shrugged and turned around, bringing the joint back to his lips to take another drag of it. Kie, instead, showed interest in the papers held between Pope’s fingers.

“What do you have to do this time? Another essay about something science-y?” she wondered. 

Pope nodded but then shook his head. “Sort of. It’s an essay but they want a story. But I don’t know what to write about. Like, most of the stuff we do is illegal.”

Kie laughed at this before saying, “Then lie. Just take the illegal parts out.”

“Hard to do when they’re essential to the story,” Pope replied. 

Now JJ laughed, smiling at Pope and diving into one of the many illegal memories they had made together.

While this helped Pope clear his head, it was not guiding him as to what to write for his essay. After about an hour or two hanging out, Pope sighed, knowing he would now have to work on the essay.

“Okay guys, I need y’all to be serious right now. I really need to get this essay done. Any ideas?”

Kie and JJ stared at him blankly, not really knowing how to help. Pope groaned at their reaction, but then groaned even louder when Kie said:

“Why don’t you ask Y/N Y/L/N? Wasn’t she second place for the scholarship?”

“Kie, I literally hate her. We’ve been competing over the top spot in our grade for our whole lives.”

Kie shrugged. “Yeah, but now the scholarship is yours anyway. And besides, didn’t you say the only thing she was better at than you is story writing?”

“I said that when I was drunk,” Pope deadpanned.

“Doesn’t mean it wasn’t true,” JJ said quickly before taking another sip of beer. 

Pope really didn’t want to go see you. He had way too much pride to do so. But his options were wearing thin and he had to send this essay in a week, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to do so himself. 

“Well, even if I went to Y/N, I doubt she would be willing to help.”

Kie gave him a hard look. “You don’t know that.”

“Neither do you, Kie,” Pope sighed. “Look, I’ll go to her but she probably hates my guts. I did take the scholarship from her.”

“Hey!” JJ scolded. “Don’t say that, man. We know you won it fair and square. You deserve it.”

“I know I did. But that doesn’t mean she won’t hate me for it. We all know she needs that scholarship just as much as I do to get into college.”

It was true. You had lived your life down in the Cut, working just as much as Pope did with his father. Your mother was the owner of a small boat repair shop which she had received after your father’s death. Because she couldn’t and didn’t know how to work on boats and because your father had taught you everything you know, you were the head repair woman there. Everyone on the island knew how much time you dedicated to the shop, almost as much time as you dedicated to school. 

“Look, man. Let’s be real. Everyone born on the Cut knows they’re probably going to be stuck here forever. You and Y/N were just lucky to have the opportunity to might have not been stuck here, but in the end, you got it. I’m sure she won’t be bitter towards you because she probably still expected her life to be spent on the Cut either way.”

Pope sighed. He knew what JJ was saying was probably true but he hated to think of that. 

“Just go to her, Pope,” Kie told him. 

With that, Pope collected his belongings and headed out towards your shop. It wasn’t far from the Chateau, maybe a five-minute walk, but Pope managed to get there in thirty minutes. He was trying to push back the inevitable. 

Once he arrived he stood outside for another good ten minutes, building up his courage to go in. Breathing in deeply, he told himself that he was going to be fine and that your hate for him had probably dissipated a bit since the end of the school year. He opened the door to the shop and found it was empty except for two men looking down at the bottom of a boat. 

They didn’t turn around when Pope had entered, too concentrated on the person Pope just now saw that was under the boat. 

“What you thinkin’?” one of the men asked as you pushed yourself from out under the boat. The skateboard you were laying upon was uncomfortable and your muscles sighed in relief as you stood up next to them. 

“We’re gonna need two orders of plugs from Guffy and then we can start working on this bad boy,” you told them before wiping your forehead. “Well, I’m off, boys.”

And just as you spun around your eyes fell upon the boy at the door.

“You have got to be kidding me.”

Pope could only smile innocently, hoping you would spare him some time of day. 

“What do you want, Heyward?” you asked rudely while heading towards the back of the shop. Pope began to follow you around, sparing a glance at the two men you stared at him dirtily. 

Pope was sure you hated him now.

“Look, I-I need your help, Y/N. And I know you hate me but I really need it.”

Anger and pain were laced in your eyes as you spun around to face the dark-skinned boy. “Yes, I do hate you. And I don’t want to help you. You took the scholarship from me, Pope.”

“Well, technically I didn’t. I won it. But,” he raised his hands in defense when you gave him another murderous look, “I seriously need your help. They gave me a task I know you’re better at than me and I don’t know what to do.” 

You began to tie your hair into a ponytail as you felt your skin grow hot with anger. “So what? You thought you would just strut in here and I’d be willing to help?”

“N-no, but I thought -”

“You thought what? That out of the kindness of my heart I would actually help you? Need I remind you that you took the scholarship from me?”

“I didn’t take the scholarship from you! I won it, fair and square and you know that!”

Your eyes fell to the ground, defeated. You knew what Pope was saying was true, but the denial had helped you cope with the fact that you weren’t enough for the scholarship. You weren’t enough to get out of the Cut.

“Look, Y/N,” Pope began awkwardly. He was scratching the back of his neck, not sure if he was going to be able to get you to help him. “I know you wanted the scholarship - hell, you probably wanted it more than me. And I’m sorry you didn’t get it because you truly deserve it, but I’m not sorry that I got it. And I know that’s selfish, but let’s be real here. We both want to get off the Cut, and we always knew that only one of us was going to make it. So please, please, please help me get out of this place.”

You thought about it. Really hard. And Pope stood before you fidgeting with his fingers and doubting if what he said was the best thing he could have said. He opened his mouth, a rant about to burst through his lips.

“Fine,” you stated. You were going against your instinct, but at least you would get him to shut up. “I’ll help you. But I get free groceries for a month.”

Pope stuttered before answering. “What - you - I - you know I can’t do that! My dad would kill me!”

“Well then, you’ll have to pay with your own money.”

“Okay, fine! But only because I’m really desperate.”

****************************************************************

And so you and Pope began to work together every day for the following week. It only took two hours for you to drop your grudge against him and laugh at his stories and jokes. He would smile at your reactions and feel his previous hate for you to slip into something more similar to love. He began to notice how pretty your eyes were when they seemed to sparkle in the afternoon light and how your skin reminded him of warm summer days. You began to notice how your stupid hatred for him began to transform into a crush. His chocolate brown eyes reminding you of coffees on chilly, winter mornings and his soft smile reminding you of innocence.

Between your hours spent working together, you would talk about other things. You told him about your mother and her disease (which didn’t let her work at the shop with you) and how your friends at school were all out of town because of a road trip they had planned which you couldn’t go on. He told you about the Pogues and the pressure he felt sometimes from his dad. You both told each other a lot more than you had ever expected to share, but the feeling of comfort and understanding that followed these confessions was enough to maintain the both of you stuck together.

Exactly a week after Pope had approached you at your boat shop, you both headed together to the post office that was near the police station. Together you sealed the envelope containing the finished essay and placed the post stamps onto it. You watched Pope pay for the dispatch of the letter and then you walked out together. 

You felt dread in your stomach, not wanting to have to turn your back on your new friendship. You didn’t know if Pope felt the same way as you did, but you felt like you had come to the end of your short relationship. You felt as if, years from now, you would look back and remember Pope as the boy you only helped write an essay and nothing more, which made you afraid to no end. You didn’t want Pope to be only that.

Unbeknownst to you, Pope felt the same way. He was expecting you to turn towards him and say goodbye, followed by a snarky remark. He expected you to go back to hating him and not thinking about him. All he wanted was you to prove him wrong.

“Do you want to grab something to eat?” you both asked at the same time. Then, your eyes widened at the same time, both of you shocked that you wanted to carry on with your friendship.

“Wait, you still want to hang out?” you asked him. Pope nodded vigorously.

“Yeah. Did you really think I wouldn’t want to be your friend anymore?” he asked, a little hurt.

“Shut up, you thought that about me as well!”

With smiles on both of your faces, you turned around towards the Wreck, where you knew Kie would give Pope a discount.

**********************************************

The Pogues hadn’t seen their smart friend for a month. Ever since JJ and Kie had convinced him of reaching out to you for help, he had disappeared.

“Pope pulling a Houdini,” JJ remarked as he arrived at the Chateau to find that, once again, Pope was not there.

“Have you guys even heard from him?” John B asked. 

JJ shrugged but Kie bit her lip. “I see him at the Wreck every once in a while. He’s been hanging around with Y/N.”

“Y/N?” John B said almost laughing. “Okay, we both know they hate each other and that’s a lie.”

“I’m not lying, JB,” Kie rolled her eyes. “I literally saw them there yesterday.”

“No way! Pope has to be dating her!” JJ exclaimed. “It only makes sense! Future valedictorian and salutatorian.”

“That would make a cute couple,” John B muttered while thinking about it.

Kie coughed, trying to bring the boys’ attention back to the main issue they had. “Look, guys, we need to get Pope to hang out with us again. He’s been blowing us off and I do not have enough patience to keep you two from doing dumb shit.”

“Mama’s mad,” JJ whispered. This earned him a smack on the head of the girl.

“Let’s just head over to her shop and see if they’re there.”

*********************************************

“Wait, so JJ stole some boat plugs?”

Pope nodded, perched upon the edge of the boat you were working on. He was leaning back, a book in his lap, as he told you one of his many crazy stories about his friends.

“I don’t know why you asked for my help for the essay when you have so many stories to tell.”

Pope sighed. “As I’ve said before, most of them are illegal.”

You nod your head at what he was saying, agreeing with him. You continued to work on the boat as you felt his eyes upon you.

Pope was looking at your eyes at first. He was counting how many flecks of color they held. Then, he moved onto your skin, noticing how smooth it looked. He wondered if it would feel smooth against his fingers, or if your mouth would feel smoother. He then noticed how plump your lips looked, and Pope could feel himself leaning closer to you.

“Y/N?” he called out so softly you almost didn’t hear him.

You spun your head to look at him, suddenly noticing how small the distance between the both of you had become. You felt butterflies erupt in your stomach and you wondered if he felt them too. Your heart was pounding in your chest, and you could only wait until his lips were pressed to yours.

Feeling nervous, Pope began to speak. “I d-don’t want this to be awkward but I’ve been wanting to kiss you for a while.”

You nodded your head, inching even closer to him. His lips looked a little chapped, but you were sure that it wouldn’t matter once you kissed him. 

“And I don’t know if you feel the same or if you -”

“Shut up, Pope,” you giggled before plunging forwards. You pressed your lips to his own, moving them and giving him a few seconds to respond. When he did you smiled a little before continuing what you were doing. Your arms reached up to hold his face while his arms brought you closer to him and positioned you between his legs. Pope’s thumb was drawing circles right at your waist, and you finally broke apart from him when the door of the shop opened.

You didn’t break eye contact with Pope, but a sudden loud whoop made you stumble away from each other. Spinning around you found JJ, John B, and a girl you recognized as a Kook standing before you. You were frozen in place as Pope headed over to them to cover up JJ’s lips. 

“Pope boy finally getting some action!” John B hollered while you felt your cheeks go red. The girl rolled her eyes at his friend before sending you an apologetic look.

It only took Pope three seconds to round them up and take them outside. You got back to working on the boat, trying to distract yourself from what had happened. You felt embarrassment rise up inside of you at being caught kissing the boy you liked.

Soon enough, Pope returned inside and stood next to you. You didn’t turn to look at him in shame and fear at what he might say.

“They wanted to see me since, you know, I haven’t been hanging around them recently.”

“Oh.” This was the moment Pope was going to tell you he didn’t want to be friends with you anymore and that he had now noticed how you were all too time-consuming. However, the boy surprised you.

“They invited us to hang out tomorrow. They said they want to meet you.”

You smiled and turned to look at him. “Really?”

“U-um, yeah. They kind of think you’re my girlfriend so…”

You blushed at that thought. Being Pope’s girlfriend was something that made your insides swell and feel light and soft and good. 

“Okay.”

“Okay as in ‘yes, I want to hang out with them’ or as in ‘yes, I want to be your girlfriend’?”

You furrowed your eyebrows. “Is that your way of asking me to be your girlfriend?”

Pope awkwardly nodded before looking at you. The smile on your face seemed to be glued on and Pope copied your facial expression. You leaned in again, kissing him softly.

“Take your guess, Pope,” you teased him while smiling. 

“I really hope it’s the second one.”

[mybiasisexo]

Blood & Bond

Genre: Angst | Fluff | Supernatural!au | Werewolf!au | College!au | OT12 (altho you only get to see Tao....)

Pairing: None....yet....

Length: 16.4k

Warning: OC | Language

Summary: Kai and his little pack of werewolf cubs’ lives get a lot more interesting when a pretty foreign girl with special abilities decides to befriend them. 

Author’s Note: I finished reading Running With Wolves (debatably one of the best werewolf exo aus ever written and maybe even the best werewolf story ever written idk read it if you havent I swear it doesn't matter who your bias is you will fall for kai!!!) and was like ‘I wanna write a werewolf!au’, but this doesnt touch a candle to the genius that is that story which is why I kinda stopped writing it. I want to make it darker, a bit more mature, so here is this! If I ever decide to humor myself and rewrite it, it will be completely different. So, enjoy this, cause, I mean, its pretty good!!! also who else misses ot12???? Just me??? ok....

MASTERLIST

1. The Witch…Kinda Sorta

“I’m open! I’m open!”

The crunching sound of sneakers against gravel could be heard around the area as a small group of young men ran across the basketball court at a park. It was an intense game, the boys were snarling at one another, not afraid to push and shove to gain the upper hand.

After ten minutes, one of the boys jumped up and with the flick of his wrists, scored the final three points.

“We win,” he grinned after the echoing swish of his victory faded into the trees.

“You cheated,” one of the boys from the other team muttered, wiping the dripping sweat off of his forehead while others around him fell to the floor, breathing hard and exhausted.

“You always say that when you lose,” one of the guys who was on the ground whined, yanking the boy’s ankle, causing him to stumble to the asphalt. They all chuckled around him.

He just sighed.

The young man who had scored the winning points tossed the sore loser a bottle of water, which he took gratefully. “Thanks, Kai.”

“No problem, Chanyeol. Also, I didn’t cheat.”

“Whatever.” He rolled his eyes and chugged half of the bottle.

The six boys sat around in silence, drinking, snacking, and just enjoying the chilling wind dry their damp skin.

“Do you smell that?” One of them asked the others, his big eyes widening.

They all paused, sniffing the air and shaking their heads.

“It smells like a fire.”

A different one shrugged, “it’s probably a forest fire or something, Kyungsoo. Nothing to worry about.”

Kyungsoo shook his head. “No, Tao, it’s close.” 

He stood up and brushed off his shorts, heading towards the smell that only he could distinguish.

The boys that he had left glanced nervously at each other before standing up as well and following their somewhat peculiar friend.

They trudged around the trees, past the playground and the water fountain, until they were surrounding the restrooms that were on the opposite side of the park.

The cement wall that was around the tiny building was covered in graffiti, and the two doors were slightly ajar.

As they approached the deserted restrooms, one of the taller boys began to cough, “ugh, Kyungsoo, you were right. Someone definitely started a fire.”

“And it’s coming from the back.”

Slowly, the group began to circle the building, and once they were at the back of the structure they paused with shock.

In front of them was a young woman. She was kneeling, her back facing them, and in front of her was a pile of black char.

“Uh….” One of the boys named Jongdae was able to muster. His rumbling voice startled the girl, and she spun around in surprise, nearly falling into the pile of black.

The boys gulped once they saw her face. She was a foreigner, which was easy to tell with her deeply tanned skin and big curly brown hair. She was wearing a pleaded skirt and a black tank top with a green plaid shirt on that was hanging off her exposed shoulders. She also had a gray sweater tied around her waist, torn black stockings and dirty combat boots.

“What are you doing?” Kai asked her with raised eyebrows.

“Uh….” She mimicked Jongdae as she slowly climbed to her feet. Her shock seemed to fade once she was standing straight, and she grinned while shrugging, “nothing?”

“That doesn’t look like nothing,” Jongdae said with narrowed eyes, his arms crossed over his chest.

“It doesn’t smell like nothing either,” Tao added with his nose scrunched with disgust. Sehun, who was right behind him, made a show of waving his hand in front of his nose.

The girl laughed nervously, “Well, it’s nothing that you boys need concern yourself with.”

She began to turn back to her work, but froze once she realized something. Her lips curled knowingly as she returned her gaze to the group of males, placing her fists on her hips, “you all are werewolves.”

That startled the group, and the six boys began talking loudly at once, trying to dismiss her wild accusation.

She sighed, “It’s alright, calm down.” They all stopped in unison and stared at her with awe. “Well, I guess since you all are a part of the super realm… I’ll let you in on my doings.”

“Super…?” Chanyeol’s eyebrows scrunched together with confusion.

“I was casting a spell,” the girl informed the group. “I’m trying to… well, recall some things… I guess you could say. I read a book earlier, and it said that burning a certain type of branch could bring suppressed memories to the forefront. But, as you can see, it didn’t work like it should have.”

Everyone eyed the pathetic pile of burnt ash.

“Anyways,” the girl began, twirling back to the werewolves. “I’m Sloane.”

“And you’re a witch,” Tao inferred.  

Sloane’s eyes narrowed at the tall boy, “I am not a witch!”

Static surrounded the cramped space and a second after the six males were on the hard ground, on top one another, unconscious.

Sloan smirked at her handy work, brushed her hands together and hopped over the bodies lying on the floor, strutting away from the restrooms.

~*~

“Yesterday was weird,” Sehun pouted the following morning. The six friends were huddled on the lawn in front of their university. It was a small and rather prestigious school with only four hundred students. Unlike most universities, the students were required to wear uniforms and a lot of the rules were similar to high school.

“I feel like I dreamt the whole thing,” Tao said, adjusting the strap on his shoulder.

Kai groaned, “I really don’t want to be here.”

“Aw, come on!” Jongdae cheered, ruffling Kai’s silky brown locks, making his hair look messier than it was prior. “School’s fun.”

“You only say that because your super power is sweet talking teachers to give you good grades,” Chanyeol rolled his eyes, but the huge grin on Jongdae’s face stayed planted.

“I like school,” Kyungsoo mumbled, causing the other boys to sigh and head inside.

The six of them were only freshman, yet they already held a reputation. As they walked the halls, others stopped and stared—some with envy, others with lust. They were easily the best looking in the school, it also helped that they had a strange rebellious aura that made girls swoon over them.

“They’re staring,” Kai, who couldn’t handle the fame to save his life, whispered to Jongdae, who loved his fame all too much.

“They always stare, Kai. I’m surprised you aren’t used to it by now. Nothing’s changed since high school.”

“Don’t they have something better to do?” He asked, voice rising with exasperation.

Jongdae shrugged and tapped Kai’s chin. “Enjoy it while it lasts, Kiddo. We only have three more years of this.”

“You’re literally three months older than me!” The younger yelled, his hands curling into fists.

“Blah, blah, blah!” Jongdae replied just as passionately.

“Kyungsoo!” Kai whined, wrapping himself around the smaller boy.

“Jongdae, leave Jongin alone, would you?”

Jongdae gulped as Kyungsoo glared at him and nodded quickly, running towards the front of the group to avoid the dark energy emanating from Kyungsoo’s eyes.

At lunchtime, the six schoolboys trickled into the cafeteria and sat around their usual table in the middle of the room. They ate quietly for the most part, some doing homework, a couple were playing cards and betting their chips, Kai was complaining to Tao how much he hated his math class while Tao slowly ate Kai’s rice.

A loud plop on the end of their table startled them, and once they all whipped around to where the noise came from, they jumped. The witch from the day before, Sloane, was standing at the end of their table, hands on hips and eyes slightly narrowed as she scanned the werewolves.

“So it wasn’t a dream,” Sehun muttered, gawking at the figure hovering over their table.

“Mind if I sit, fellow classmates?” She asked and slid into one of the last remaining two chairs before anyone had time to object. She began scarfing down her rice nearly frantically and the boys sat frozen, staring at her with wide eyes.

“The food here is to die for,” she moaned with her mouth stuffed with food. That seemed to knock some sense into the others, unpausing them, and they all began to eat their food as well—all while keeping an eye on the new girl that was currently sitting right beside Kyungsoo.

He scaled her lean body with his eyes, and couldn’t help but to grin at how she was wearing her uniform. The skirt rolled up, so that it ended slightly above her mid-thigh, her dress shirt half tucked, a few buttons at the top undone, her jacket sleeves pushed up to her elbows. She still wore black stockings, but these ones ended above her knees and her scuffed combat boots hugged her feet comfortably. Her hair was still wild and free and she was covered in jewelry—her neck, fingers, ears and wrists wrapped in gold and black.

The dishevelment of her uniform resembled Kai’s.

“How… How are you here?” Tao finally sputtered, the other guys seemed to all let out a collective breath of relief with the question finally out in the open.

Sloane glanced at all the people at the table and giggled softly, “I enrolled.”

“Are you stalking us?” Sehun asked her rudely, his usually soft features hardening into a glare.

She flat out laughed at that, it ringed mockingly, “of course not! I enrolled about two weeks ago. It’s a coincidence that we bumped into each other yesterday. Either that or fate. Most likely fate though….” Her last few words were muttered, her talking more to herself then the boys, but they heard it regardless and they seemed to tense at the word.

“Is today your first day?” Kyungsoo quietly asked the young witch. She nodded. “Mind if I see your schedule?”

She smiled shyly before digging into her bag until she found the slip of paper she needed. Kyungsoo scanned it, nodding here and there and finally gave it back to her, “we have english together, along with Chanyeol. You and Chanyeol also have biology together. You have history with Jongdae and Sehun and trig with Kai.”

She nodded slowly, digesting what he just said before opening her mouth to ask, “So who is who?”

“Oh, right, I forgot we haven’t introduced ourselves,” Kyungsoo chuckled, scratching the back of his head. One by one, the werewolves introduced themselves to Sloane.

Except Kai.

He just watched the strange girl as she blinked at him expectantly.

Finally Kyungsoo sighed and gestured to the broody male, “that is Kai. Don’t mind him, he doesn’t bite.”

“Depends on the time of day,” Jongdae added, causing them to chuckle.

“It’s nice meeting you all,” Sloane grinned. “It’s been a while since I’ve stumbled across someone from the super realm.”

“The super realm?”

“Yeah, folks with supernatural abilities. Such as werewolves, vampires, and wi—” She seemed to choke on the last word.

“Witches? Just like you are?” Kai finally broke his silence, studying her intently.

Her eyes darkened as they met his, “I’m not a witch…Kai?”

He shrugged and chugged his milk. Their lunch break came to an end and Kyungsoo and Chanyeol lead Sloane to their next class.

~*~

“She can’t hang out with us,” Kai informed his pack. Class had finally ended and the six of them instantly headed up to the rooftop, where they usually went when they had to talk about something serious on school grounds.

“Why not?” Sehun asked his leader, he tilted his head like a curious puppy.

“There is something off about her,” Kai elaborated. “I get strange vibes from her.”

“It’s her power,” Chanyeol shrugged. “She’s very powerful. I’m surprised we didn’t notice it yesterday.”

“There are a lot of things you didn’t notice yesterday,” Kyungsoo muttered with an eye roll, remembering the fire only he could smell.

Kai shook his head, “I don’t think that’s it. I mean, yeah she’s definitely powerful, but there is something else about her that puts me on edge.”

“Is it her sense of fashion?” Tao asked with true concern. “I mean, her uniform was like the female version of yours—”

“No it wasn’t!” Kai snapped, huffing as the others started laughing. He pinched the bridge of his nose, “I’m being serious. She can’t be around us.”

A few of the boys sighed, but had to obey their alpha’s order.

As they walked out of the school, Sloane was leaning against the stairs. Once they were close enough, she went up to fall in step with them.

“So, where are we going? Are we doing some supernatural stuff? Are you going wolf? Or can you only do that when there is a full moon?”

It took everything in Kyungsoo not to answer her questions. He could admit to himself that he had taken a quick liking to the foreign girl. The six boys continued walking, attempting to give her the cold shoulder.

She appeared to not register their attempt as she continued. “Maybe something boring, like homework, huh?” Tao could hear laughter in her voice. “Werewolves doing their homework? Isn’t that comical?”

“Sloane,” Kai began, slowing down so that he was walking beside her. She glanced at him, noticing his dark beautiful features. “Stop following us. We don’t want you to hang out with us.”

She stopped walking, “what?”

She glanced at the rest. They were a few steps in front of her and Kai, half circled and turned towards the two.

“You are not a member of our pack,” Kai continued with a voice cold and sharp as icicles, catching her attention again. “What? You thought you could get an in with us because of what you are? You’re nothing special. You’re just another girl. No. You’re just a weird witch.”

He watched her jaw clench and her thin fingers tighten against the strap of her bag, “I told you already that—”

“All the same,” he smiled politely at her and she wanted to slap it off him at that moment. What a typical pretty boy!

She took a step away from the group, “fine. I won’t interfere with you or your math homework. Good luck trying to get that D up.”

Kai arched an eyebrow as she spun on her heels, and winced as her brown curls slapped him viciously across the face as she stomped away.

“That was harsh,” Chanyeol admitted with a sigh. All the boys were watching Sloane’s form blend into the crowd.

Kai didn’t reply, instead he touched his cheek where her hair hit him, when he pulled his hand away he noticed blood on his fingertips.

~*~

True to her word—and much to Kai’s relief—Sloane left them alone.

For the rest of the week, they didn’t see her in the cafeteria, and in the classes they shared, she sat as far as possible from any one of them. She must not have taken it too badly, because whenever they crossed paths in the hallways she appeared chipper. She appeared to bounce when she walked, as if she had zero cares in the world and it caused a lot of stares. The student population were all extremely curious of the foreign new girl who came out of nowhere and was able to eat lunch with Kai and his group of hot friends—even if for a day.

On Saturday, the six boys lounged around Kai’s house, doing homework, studying, playing videogames, whatever to pass the time. The weekend was their favorite—especially Kai’s—they didn’t have to deal with the stress of being stared at and judged for seven hours of the day.

“Who wants to play another round of ball?” Tao asked suddenly, spinning the dingy basketball that he found resting on the floor on one of his fingers.

“I’m down,” Chanyeol said. His eyes turned to slits as he glared at Kai, “plus, we need a rematch.”

“Why?” Kai scoffed. “You want to get your ass handed to you again?”

“Shut up!” The two boys started wrestling around the living room while the others gathered everything needed for their trip to the park.

Once there, they spared no time splitting into teams and beginning their vigorous round of basketball. On one team was Kai, Sehun, and Kyungsoo while Jongdae, Chanyeol, and Tao played against them.

They were tied; Kai had the ball and was about to score the winning point when a strong wind blew the ball out of his grip. They all watched as it rolled off the court and into the semi muddy grass.

“What the—?”

Strange growling noises could be heard from the trees surrounding the park. The six werewolves huddled together, listening intently, trying to figure out what was going on.

Slowly, they made their way towards the trees. Hairs sticking up like the fur on a frightened cat, eyes shining colors that were not the usual brown, fingers curling into claws, they anticipated an attack.

They were not disappointed.

Something flew from out the shadows, crashing roughly into Kyungsoo, dragging him down to the ground. It appeared human, but had bluish-gray flesh with long limbs, fingers, and fangs. It was literally skin and bones and the noise that came out of its mouth when Kyungsoo lashed at it with his claws was chillingly inhuman.

Kyungsoo pushed the corpse off of himself and sat up with wide eyes glowing ice blue, “What the fuck was that?!”

He wasn’t able to get an answer. More of the bizarre looking creatures sprang from out of the shadows, all running towards the six werewolves. The boys did not hesitate to attack back; one by one they all fought against the monsters, but were outnumbered. Tao yelped in pain as one of the creatures slashed the side of his stomach, Sehun stumbled and landed hard on the ground, a crunching noise following suit. Jongdae was thrown across the field and hit a tree painfully, knocking him unconscious.

The werewolves were losing and Kai, the alpha, could feel it. He scanned the field, watching his pack mates battle the creepy beasts. There seemed to be even more coming out of the forest, Kai had to think quickly.

While he was preoccupied with his thoughts, one of the creatures saw its chance for a surprise attack and sprinted towards him, claws and fangs at the ready. Kai sensed its approach at the nick of time, but was too close to the monster to move. Something bumped into him from behind, and he landed hard on the grass. The creature twirled in confusion and froze when it saw whatever it was that knocked Kai over. Kai also glanced up and was stunned to see Sloane hovered over him eyeing the thing that would have killed him a second ago.

She pulled out something shiny from her belt. Kai noticed that it was a dagger with weird swirls engraved in the metal.

“Restitui quondam tibi,” she muttered with the knife over her head. She then dived the knife deep into the soil until only the hilt could be seen.

Bloodcurdling screams were soon heard, so deafeningly loud, Kai winced and covered his sensitive ears with his hands. He watched in confusion and shock as the creatures frantically ran away from the park, vanishing into the trees. The air seemed to still with the newfound silence.

Sloane leaned back on her heels, letting go of the knife that was still pinned to the ground with a relieved sigh. Kai and a few of the others who weren’t in critical condition stumbled onto their feet, glancing around them in awe.

“How did you do that?” Kai asked Sloane.

She let out a breathy laugh and shrugged tiredly, “looks like I can hang out with you after all.”

~*~

“Your nose is bleeding,” Kyungsoo stated, pointing at Sloane’s face. Her eyes widened as she dipped her finger in the warm liquid sliding down her cupid’s bow. With a soft chuckle, Kyungsoo slid her a tissue, which she took gratefully, placing it hesitantly against her face.

Tao, Sehun, and Jongdae were lying on the couches, all three of them unconscious from the pain. Tao’s side seemed to be ripped into shreds, blood running steadily onto the wooden floorboards. Sehun’s arm was broken at both the elbow and the middle of his forearm, while Jongdae’s head was bleeding and a few of his ribs were broken.

“What are we going to do? They’re not healing themselves!” Chanyeol asked desperately, his deep voice vibrating off the walls of the silent room. His arms were crossed against his chest and his eyebrows tried to unite at the center of his forehead.

Slowly and somewhat uneasily, Sloane stood up, “I can help them.”

“But you’re exhausted,” Kyungsoo said, standing up with her to make sure she didn’t fall.

She shook her head, “I can do it.”

She approached Tao first, since his condition appeared to be the worst, “Kyungsoo, can you sit him up for me, please?”

He silently did as he was told, and Tao groaned a bit, but his eyes remained closed. Sloane sat beside him and rested her forehead on his while she wrapped her arms around him, making sure one of her hands was firmly pressed against his wound. She started muttering under her breath and the three boys who were conscious to witness the ordeal stared in shock and wonder as his side began to glow a silver white. Sloane’s muttering became more urgent and she finally pulled away. She gently laid Tao back onto the couch and rubbed her fingers against his ribs that were now hidden by his unblemished flesh. Kai blinked and kneeled down beside Tao, staring at the side of his stomach that was, just a few seconds ago, torn apart with blood gushing out of it. It now was back together, as if it had not been touched at all. Kai ran his fingers across the boy’s skin and Tao began moving, coming too.

Sloane snatched Kai’s wrist and he lifted his eyes to meet hers with a threatening growl. The girl was unfazed, “let him rest.”

Kai yanked his wrist out of her grasp and Sloane walked away as if the encounter never happened, walking over to Jongdae. Kyungsoo again lifted the boy up so that Sloane could press her forehead against his, but this time, she wrapped one arm around his head and the other around his waist. She once again muttered some words, and Jongdae started whimpering silently.

“I know, honey, I know.” She broke her chanting to say and sighed, pulling him closer towards her. After a few minutes, she laid him back down. His breathing was back to normal and his eyes moved against his eyelids.

Chanyeol quickly went to Jongdae’s side, eyes full of wonder as he checked to see that his wounds were healed.

Sloane kneeled beside Sehun’s sleeping form and tilted his head toward her, placing her’s against his. She rubbed his arm as she started her chanting, and quickly finished with him. When she removed her head from his, his eyes fluttered open and he tiredly stared at her. His eyes saying everything his mouth couldn’t. His gaze remained on her as she stumbled to her feet and swayed a bit, his other hand rubbing his once broken arm like she was doing prior.

“Whoa,” Kyungsoo said as he caught Sloane’s now unconscious body.

“Let her sleep here,” Tao’s groggy voice was heard, and they turned to see him lazily blinking up at Kyungsoo, tapping the small space beside him on the couch. Kyungsoo glanced at Kai for approval and the alpha shrugged.

They both started chuckling at the image of Tao’s tall frame clinging to the witch’s body like a koala to a tree.

~*~

When Sloane’s eyes finally opened, she was welcomed with darkness. Something was pressed against her, pinning her down to the soft surface she laid on. She tried to move and froze when she heard a grunt in her ear and a tightening around her body.

A light came on and she blinked, not used to the brightness. She noticed Kai sitting on an armchair; he had turned on the lamp on top of the table beside him. He was gazing sternly at her with gold glowing eyes.

She turned away with a gulp and scanned the room. She was still in his living room, lying on a couch with Tao, who had wrapped himself around her, snuggling close. Jongdae was still resting on a couch, but Sehun and the other two boys weren’t present.

“What time is it?” Sloane asked the brooding werewolf, her voice rough from sleep.

“Eight thirty.”

She had slept for four hours. Sloane tried to sit up again, but Tao’s hold on her was unrelenting, she somehow was yanked closer to the boy, his nose digging into the crook of her neck. She sighed with frustration.

Kai chuckled at her despair, “he’s a cuddler.”

“I’ve gathered.” The two were quiet for a minute. “Are they alright?”

Kai nodded. “Yeah.” The humor left his voice. “You saved us.”

She could hear the question in his statement, and knew he would ask, but her stomach interrupted him with a loud growl.

He grunted, “Hungry?”

She rolled her eyes, “using so much of my power is draining. I need to regain my energy.”

She heard him shuffle around until he was hovering over her with an outstretched hand. His eyes were back to a deep chocolate brown, although she could still see the disdain for her in them, “Kyungsoo’s in the kitchen cooking. Let’s go.”

It was a battle trying to unknot Sloane from Tao, but with a few yanks, she was free and she gratefully smiled at Kai, it quickly turned into a scowl as he dropped her hand as if it burnt him and headed towards the kitchen without checking to see if she was following.

The first thing Sloane noticed once she entered the kitchen was Kyungsoo. He was standing in front of the stove, wearing a cute pale pink apron, which contrasted with his black clothing, singing softly to himself as he stirred around whatever he was making. Chanyeol and Sehun were seated at the island, Chanyeol messing with his phone while Sehun rolled an orange around the granite tabletop, bored and hungry as hell.

They all turned towards Kai and Sloane once they entered. Kyungsoo smiled at them and Sehun nearly fell off his stool as he tried to reach the witch.

When he was in front of her, he just stood there, staring at her intently. She returned his gaze, although a bit self-consciously—for he was just a few centimeters away—and they remained in that position until someone else came stumbling into the kitchen. Everyone turned again to see a groggy disheveled Tao leaning against the wall, “you left me!”

~*~

Everyone gathered around Kai’s dining table as Kyungsoo and Chanyeol set it, placing down the huge feast around the table. Kai woke Jongdae up, and he joined the rest of them, just as ravenous as the others.

Sloane learned something then, and it was that werewolves could eat, and could eat a lot. Kyungsoo had made enough food for about twelve people, and the werewolves scarfed down every bit on their plates as though it were their last meal. There was not a bone left once everyone was satisfied. Chanyeol burped obnoxiously as he leaned back on his chair, rubbing his protruding belly.

“Are you full, Sloane?” Sehun, who was sitting beside her, asked. She nodded and stood up, helping gather up all the dishes and setting up the sinks to wash them.

“You don’t have to do that,” Kai said, coming up beside her as she poured the dish soap into the water.

“It’s alright. I’d feel bad if I didn’t do anything.”

Kai sighed, Sloane felt he wanted to say something, but he refrained and she didn’t push him. The two washed in silence. A few of the boys had left to get ice cream and the other two that were left were laying around on the couch, watching television. Sloane could hear Chanyeol guffaw from time to time and it made her smile.

Once they finished the dishes, they joined the others in the living room. They were all gathered around, a pint per person, and now that they were settled, Kai turned the television off and they all turned to the stranger in the room.

She looked up at them wearily, “yes?”

“We have some questions,” Kai began. She slowly placed her ice cream onto the table and sighed, folding her hands over her knees. “What were those things?”

Her eyes widened in shock, “you mean, you don’t know?”

The boys all shook their head.

“They were—I can’t believe you don’t know—they were vampires.”

“What?!” The boys asked.

“We’ve seen a few vampires before,” Sehun started. “But none that looked like that.”

“There are three different types of vampires, and even calling them vampires is being generous. They are a type of immortal, the ones that crave blood. You have the Ancients, whose blood still runs in their veins because they were turned when they were still alive. Those are the stereotypical vampires that everyone knows. They appear human and drink blood and the like. The second type are the Medietas, they were turned at the brink of death, they are less human then ancients, but still can pass for human. They always have pale skin and dilated eyes; their fangs can’t be hidden….

“Then you have the last kind of vampire, the Mortuum, who were turned after death. As you saw, they are monsters. They don’t have any cognitive thinking, only hunger for blood.”

“Why did they attack us? Why were they here?” Jongdae asked.

“You don’t know much, do you?” Sloane asked, sparing them a judgmental glance. “Werewolves and vampires are mortal enemies, and this just so happens to be your territory. I highly doubt you all know, but this town is a supernatural goldmine! The power that flows through here is strong enough to pull many of us here—myself included. Those vampires were drawn here because of that energy, but they happened to run into you guys, and their instincts kicked in, so they attacked.”

“Why couldn’t we heal ourselves?” Sehun asked quietly, rubbing his once broken arm.

Sloane swallowed thickly, “That’s the thing about being mortal enemies. It’s easy to destroy the other. Vampires have the ability to disable your fast healing as well as your other wolf abilities, as do you to them.”

“How do you know all of this?” Kai muttered, somewhat frustrated by his lack of knowledge.

She shrugged, “I read. A lot.”

“What did you do back there? You spoke that weird language…”

“Latin, the language of the dead.”

“You mean the dead language.” Kyungsoo corrected.

She shook her head, “no, I meant what I said. Latin is the language of the dead. What I did back there was cast a vanquishing spell. It pretty much banned that coven from returning. But, like most spells, there’s a catch. The spell only works for that coven alone—meaning other covens may enter without a hitch—and it only lasts for a certain amount of time, ten years to be exact. After that, they can return and cause all the havoc they want.”

The boys were silent for a while, digesting everything Sloane had told them. Finally Tao spoke up, “….Coven…?”

Sloane groaned and fell back on her chair, “why don’t you guys know this stuff? You’re werewolves!”

“We’re young,” Jongdae defended. “And also, none of us like to read.”

She shook her head and laughed with disbelief, “how you’ve survived this long is a mystery.”

“We got guts,” Chanyeol grinned.

“And lack of brains,” she mumbled, but they all heard her.

She rose to her feet, “I should probably go….”

“Where are you staying? One of us can take you,” Kyungsoo applied.

“I, uh….” She shuffled her feet.

“You don’t have a place to stay, do you?” Chanyeol asked. The pack glanced at her.

“I’ve been staying at different hotels, using spells to trick them into thinking I paid, or forgetting I was even there. I don’t have any money on me.”

“So, you’re homeless?”

She shrugged, staring at her feet.

“You can stay here,” Kyungsoo offered.

“What?” Sloane and Kai asked at the same time.

Kyungsoo shrugged at his leader, “Kai lives here all alone, and he has two guest rooms. You’re going to school with us now, and it would be nice to have you around, being that you know a lot more about this stuff than us…. We have a bit to learn from each other.”

“I don’t want her living here,” Kai spat through clenched teeth. This place was his sanctuary; he didn’t want some strange girl with magical powers who he still didn’t trust to ruin that for him.

“Come on, Jongin, don’t be stubborn.”

“Don’t call me that in front of her. She’s not staying here and that’s final!” Kyungsoo suddenly pulled Kai into a headlock and dragged him away from the living room.

“We need a moment,” he informed Sloane as they disappeared down the hall, into another room. It was dead silent as they waited for the duo to return, Sehun and Tao’s grins never left their face while Chanyeol and Jongdae chuckled every once in a while.

Seven minutes later, the two reemerged. Kai huffing and pouting while Kyungsoo’s lips stretched into a heart shaped grin.

He nudged Kai forward, and with an eye roll, the leader trudged to the girl with his hands in his pockets and muttered, “you can stay here.”

“What was that?” Jongdae asked dramatically, his smile stretched evilly.

Kai rolled his eyes again and raised his voice, “you can stay here…Sloane.”

“Thank you,” she said but the other boys’ guffawing quickly swallowed it up.

He cleared his throat and scratched the back of his neck, “Whatever.”

His pack left his place soon after that. As soon as Kai and Sloane were alone, he cornered her and sat her down.

“I still don’t think you being around us is a good idea,” he began. Sloane’s eyes were wide as she took in his words. “I don’t trust you. I know you are a witch, despite what you want us to believe, and I’m keeping a close eye on you.”

He sighed, “That being said, you did save my pack’s lives today, and that is something I’m indebted to. So, I promise to let you stay here, as a form of payment for what you did today, alright?”

Sloane nodded with understanding, “I promise, in return, Kai, that I’ll prove to you that I am no threat. As Kyungsoo said earlier, we have a bit to learn from one another.”

“That we do, Sloane. That we do. Let me show you your room.”

2. House Rules & Lone Wolves

“She carries this ancient looking suitcase and it is literally the only thing she owns. It has her clothes in it, and this book that looks just as old as the suitcase, and that is it,” Kai informed his pack mates as they were all walking up to the cafeteria.

It was a Monday, their first day back since Sloane saved them from the vampires, and Kai was having a rough time adjusting to the whole living-with-a-witch-that-may-not-actually-be-a-witch situation Kyungsoo unceremoniously thrust him into.

“Until then, I mean, she’s alright. She’s quiet, stayed in her room for most of the day, and only came out to eat or use the bathroom. We’re going shopping later tonight so she can buy a toothbrush and whatnot.” Kai shook his head in disbelief, “I can’t believe I have a roommate.”

“A really pretty magical roommate at that,” Chanyeol added with a nod.

“You think she’s pretty?” Kai asked, sparing the taller boy a judgmental glance.

“Well, yeah? She’s very pretty,” Chanyeol shrugged.

“That means a lot coming from Chanyeol,” Sehun snorted, nudging his fellow playboy friend.

“If she gives you any problems,” Kyungsoo said, as they all sat around their table. “You can always kick her out.”

Kai sighed, “You’re right, I just… what will my aunt think?”

“What will your cousin think?” Tao asked. “Once he finds out you have a good looking girl living with you….”

Kai’s eyes widened with horror, “he shall never find out.”

“Not to mention,” Jongdae began with a sharp curve to his lips. “What your little buddy downstairs will think about this situation.”

“Jongdae! I’ll have your head!” Kai pounced on top of the table, reaching for his evil friend’s neck, when the center of his problems finally joined them.

“What did I miss?” Sloane asked Chanyeol under her breath as she slid into the seat beside him.

The tall boy shrugged, chuckling all the while, “Kai’s having some issues and Jongdae is really bad at giving advice.”

The girl nodded with wide eyes, placing a spoon filled with soup into her mouth thoughtfully.

After Kai was satisfied with the purplish hue Jongdae’s face took from the lack of oxygen, he settled back down and Tao rubbed his friend’s back as he coughed a lung out.

Once everyone was settled, Kyungsoo began talking, “the full moon is this Saturday.”

All the boys seemed to grow tense once the words were uttered.

Sloane, on the other hand, gasped, “Does this mean you’re finally going to go all wolf?!”

She began squealing.

“Why are you so excited to see us as wolves?” Kai asked, baffled.

Her jaw dropped, staring at him in disbelief, “why wouldn’t I?! It’s not every day you run into werewolves! I can’t wait to see your fur. How big do you guys get? Do you still have your human mind? Is the shift painful?”

“Whoa whoa!” Sehun said chuckling. “One question at a time.”

“Um,” Kyungsoo began thoughtfully. “Pretty big, yes, and yes.”

“But,” Kai drawled out, sending a warning with his eyes to his pack mates before meeting Sloane’s. “You are not going to be able to see our fur. You’re going to stay in the house for the entire night.”

Sloane’s face fell, “What?”

“It’s dangerous for you to be out with us in our wolf forms. Yeah, we do keep our humanity, but the full moon pulls us towards our wolves, those instincts are quicker. You can get hurt if you are not careful.”

Sloane’s shoulders fell, “but… I really wanted to see your wolf forms. I bet you guys are beautiful.”

“We can just tell you,” Jongdae shrugged. “And we can always half shift, you know? Our eyes change colors and our claws and fangs come out. But during the full moon is when we shift completely and it’s out of our control, and aw you think we’re beautiful?”

“Let’s just show her!” Sehun yelled excitedly. Tao gasped loudly and nodded in agreement.

“No,” Kai said immediately. He used his alpha voice, so the others had no choice but to listen. That didn’t stop Tao and Sehun from whining.

“You’re no fun,” Sloane pouted, twirling her spoon in her food.

Kai just shrugged, “being the alpha means keeping a level head.”

“And which head exactly is it that must be level, huh, Kai?” Jongdae questioned with a wicked grin.

“Have you not learned your lesson?!” Kai barked, hopping across the table to choke Jongdae out again.

Kyungsoo sighed, while the others started making bets over if Jongdae would pass out or not, and Sloane lifted her hand from her spoon, even though it remained swirling around her soup.

~*~

“There are rules to my house that we haven’t discussed yet,” Kai informed Sloane as he pushed a cart through E-Mart. She walked beside him, well around him, running from one side of an aisle to the other, tossing things into the cart.

“Like what?” She asked as she studied the different types of deodorant.

“Like…” Kai began, thinking of something. “You can’t invite anybody over without my permission.”

“Well that’s fine. I only know you guys.” She finally settled on a deodorant and continued towards the hair products.

“Any food that’s in the fridge will be for the both of us, I don’t expect you to get a job or pay rent or anything, but if you could hold your keep, you know, cleaning after yourself, cooking dinner, washing dishes—”

“Making sure my hair doesn’t clog the drain. I get it,” she placed watermelon scented shampoo and conditioner in the overflowing cart and continued on.

“Respect my things and my personal space and I think we’ll get along just fine.”

She twirled around to shoot him a quick salute and returned back to leading the way towards the toy aisle.

“Why are we here?” Kai asked skeptically.

Sloane laughed and stopped in front of the board and card games, “We should have game nights.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“I think it is. Come on, Kai, live a little.”

Kai rolled his eyes, but helped Sloane decide on a few games they could play.

After they picked them, they headed towards check out.

“How can you pay for all this?” Sloane asked, munching on a Slim Jim that had been rung already.

“My parents had a lot of money,” Kai stated, sliding his black card to pay for their items.

“I couldn’t help but notice the ‘had’ in that sentence,” Sloane pointed out.

Kai shrugged again, feigning nonchalant. He didn’t say anything as they headed to his car.

Once on the road, Sloane played with the radio for a minute until she found a song she liked. She started shaking her curls and Kai pressed his lips together to hide a rare amused grin. Once the song was over, she turned the volume down, “You are one of the younger members of the pack, right?”

“Yup. Sehun’s the only one younger than me.”

“Then how come you are the alpha?”

He winced, “I’m the strongest.” He left it at that.

“But…” She let her sentence carry; knowing that Kai didn’t want to talk about this either. “Never mind. Sorry I asked.”

Kai blinked at her in surprise, and for some odd reason felt guilty, “its fine. I’ll tell you…someday.”

She nodded at him, “I’d like that.”

Kai pulled into his driveway, and the two dragged their bags into the house.

“Thank you again for taking me in. It means so much to me, I don’t think you understand.”

Kai scratched the back of his neck, “You saved my life, this is the least I can do. Just know that I am waiting patiently for you to fuck up so I can kick you out.”

“And ever so charming,” Sloane muttered. She perked up instantly. “I’ll make dinner!”

“I have another question,” Sloane said, once she started cooking. Kai, who was still putting things away, groaned and Sloane took that as permission.

“Why won’t you let me be around you guys once you change?”

Kai clenched his jaw, “I told you, it’s dangerous.”

“I’m not a mere mortal, Kai. I’m sure I could handle it. I can help.”

“There’s no need for help, Sloane. We change, we venture the woods, and then we turn back into humans at dawn. He meet here, eat, shower, and then they all go home. That’s how we’ve always done it, that’s how it will go on Saturday.”

“But, maybe I can fold your clothes for you, or cast a spell to make the shift easier to handle, or something?”

Kai shook his head, “We can handle it. We’ve been shifting together for a few years now. Just stay here and wait for us to return, alright?”

Sloane sighed, “Fine.”

Kai let out a relieved breath. He didn’t want to tell her how they hunted and killed innocent animals. How they howled at the moon for hours. How he used the pain of the shift as a reminder of the monster that he was, of the burden his family and fellow pack members had to carry. She didn’t need to know any of that.  

~*~

The following day, after school had ended, Sloane found herself at the nearest public library. She had decided that she would try to help Kai and his pack as much as possible without being a burden or upsetting the alpha, so she spent about an hour and a half searching for the right books about plants and glancing around at books about witchcraft—coming up empty on the latter.

Satisfied with her borrowed books, she bounced out of the building with a warm smile on her face. The sun was shining despite the chilly autumn breeze, and she could tell that things were finally looking up for her.

Those thoughts turned sour as her body collided with one in front of her. Her newly acquired books tumbling towards the asphalt, but before she could finish her blink, the person she bumped had them stacked neatly in his hands. They never even touched the ground.

Her eyes widened as she took in the stack before lifting them up to see a boy around her age, a stunningly bright smile on his just as attractive face, “here you go, miss.”

“Thank you,” she stuttered, collecting them from his grasp as he bowed and proceeded on his way before she could yell out an apology. She followed him with her eyes; he seemed in a rush, almost running as he crossed the street.

“Weird,” she pouted. His energy was off, and she couldn’t figure out why.

“What’s weird?” A deep voice asked from behind her and she jumped out her skin as Kyungsoo seemed to appear out of thin air.

“I…” She spun back to where she last saw the boy but he was already long gone. “There was a guy….”

Kyungsoo just arched an eyebrow up at her, as she slowly came back to her senses. “How did you find me?”

He shrugged, a smug smile on his face, “I’m getting really familiar with your scent. Also Kai sent me to look for you, he was getting worried.”

She scoffed, “Kai? Worried about me? I’m sure.”

“He worries about anyone he feels he has to protect.” The two fell into step, heading towards Kyungsoo’s car that was parked on the corner of the street.

“He feels like he has to protect me? I’m a magical being,” Sloane almost scoffed. The two settled into their seats, and Kyungsoo took off towards Kai’s house.

“But you’re living under his roof. That makes you his responsibility in his eyes.” He could sense her disbelief. “It’s the alpha in him.”

She nodded understandably at that, “I never got to thank you.”

“For what?”

“For making him take me in. If it weren’t for you, I’d probably still be mooching off hotel workers. I hated doing that.”

Kyungsoo smiled at her, “all in a days work. You’re the first wit—uh… magical being we’ve ever ran into. At least, one around our age, who didn’t want our heads on a platter.”

Sloane smirked at Kyungsoo stuttering over her title. “So you have dealt with witches before?”

Kyungsoo nodded, “yup. Ones passing though who had a dislike for us pups.”

Sloane cracked a grin at that, “you’re funny, Kyungsoo.”

He blinked owlishly at her, “that’s a first.”

She burst out laughing at his reply and shook her head with a sigh, “you’re also very refreshing. I appreciate that.”

“You seem to appreciate a lot of things.”

“I’ve had a past that allows me to do as such.”

Kyungsoo sensed the bitterness she tried to suppress and it piqued his interest. He knew better than to press her on it though, deciding instead to change the subject quickly, “what you got there?” He pointed at the books in her hands.

“Some books about plants. You know plants have a ton of magical attributes? Certain plants give us certain powers or take some away.”

Kyungsoo nodded, “like Wolfsbane.”

“Yes. Which, please remind me, I must read up on. Now that I’m living and hanging out with a bunch of wolves, I need to know as much as possible about you all.”

“Do magical beings like you have plants that are your kryptonite?”

“I’m pretty sure. I haven’t looked into it, but I know there must be.”

“You’ve really made me curious about all this supernatural stuff. We haven’t really worried about these things, I guess being young and powerful makes you really ignorant to certain things at times.”

They finally reached Sloane’s new home, and Kyungsoo held the door open for her as they entered the loft.

“Yeah, we both have quite a bit to learn, huh?”

“It seems so.”

“Sloane!” Tao squealed once she was in his vision. He hopped off the couch and leaped on her, causing the books she was holding to fall again. Kyungsoo quickly plucked them from the air, gathering them into a pile in his hands.

“Wolf reflexes,” he smirked once he noticed Sloane’s shocked expression.

“Is that so?” she sputtered.

“Sloane! Kai told us you bought games! Let’s play some!” Tao, who was still wrapped around the girl said, dragging her over towards the bookcase where the games she and Kai had bought the day before had been placed.

Something Sloane had noticed was the way Tao, Sehun, and Jongdae treated her. Ever since she healed them, they had seemed to hover around her, always needy. She wondered if her power had anything to do with that.

They decided on Apples to Apples, and the rest of the gang joined them in the living room. Chanyeol and Jongdae were both really good at playing, although Jongdae tried to make his answers as inappropriate as possible. They snacked and joked and relaxed for a few hours. Sehun and Tao had Sloane sandwiched between them and Jongdae constantly asked her if she needed anything. Kai was suspicious, but his thoughts on the matter speculated about the same as Sloane’s.

“Those three seem to be smitten with you,” Kai mentioned when he was able to corner Sloane in the kitchen.

She nodded, digging in the pantry for more snacks.

“I couldn’t help but wonder if your power had anything to do with that.”

Sloane stiffened at his tone and spun around, facing the wolf, “are you accusing me of something?”

Kai smirked and shrugged, “you didn’t cast a spell on them to make them act like that, did you?”

“Of course not! Why would I?”

“Because if some of my pack members love you, it would be easier for me to accept you.”

“That’s ridiculous, Kai. I think when I healed them it made a slight bond. They’ll get over it in a couple days. I already told you I’m not evil.” She walked towards him so that she could clearly look into his eyes and so that he could hear her heartbeat better. “I’m not out to get you and your pack. So you can relax.”

Kai blinked at her, noticing her heartbeat remain steady. He clenched his jaw and snatched the chocolate cupcakes from Sloane’s grasp. Spinning on his heels, he returned to the living room where the others were waiting for them to return.

Sloane sunk into a stool near her, holding her head in her hands, feeling slightly exhausted from dealing with Kai’s attitude and distrust.

She was going to win him over somehow.

“You alright?” Sloane lifted her head to see Jongdae watching her anxiously.

“Yeah. Fine,” she tried to smile, but it wouldn’t stay on for long.

“Don’t mind Kai,” Jongdae advised, walking over to the girl with his hands in his pockets and a warm smile on his face. “He’s all bark.”

She laughed at that, “He doesn’t seem to trust very easily.”

Jongdae shook his head at that, “nope. It took him ages to warm up to me, actually.”

“Really?”

Jongdae’s grin stretched mischievously, “I appeared out of nowhere, kind of like you did. He had no idea what to do with me, and I got on his nerves. It just takes him some time.” He worked up the courage to place his hand on Sloane’s back, rubbing it reassuringly. “Will you please come join us? I have to whoop your asses at Apples to Apples again.”

Sloane rolled her eyes and pushed him away, following him out into the living room.

~*~

“Sloane! Sit next to me!” Sehun called as soon as Sloane stepped into their shared history class. She smiled and took a step, but as soon as she did, Jongdae ran into the room, wrapped his arm around her waist and dragged her away to sit next to him. Sehun stared in disbelief before he whined and began sulking, and a few girls that were sitting behind him started quietly squealing to themselves.

Jongdae began laughing hysterically and Sloane started questioning whether coming here was a good idea after all.

“Mr. Kim!” Their history teacher, Professor Park, barked once she entered the room. “Control yourself or I’m kicking you out… again!”

Jongdae waved his hand dismissively, but tried to contain his chuckles.

Their teacher began lecture and Jongdae leaned over to Sloane, “tomorrow’s Saturday.”

Sloane nodded her head; taking notes quickly before turning to Jongdae, “are you scared?”

He scoffed, “are you kidding? This is a part of who I am. I’ve been doing this for years now, it’s routine.”

“So why are you reminding me of it?”

“Because I can practically smell the tension on you. You’re not planning on going against Kai’s order, are you?”

Sloane blinked rapidly at her fellow classmate and shook her head vehemently, “no, no, that’s not it.”

“Well, what is it then?”

“I…”

“Sloane…”

She sighed, but before she could tell him what was going on in her head, Professor Park called on her. She answered her question correctly—annoying her teacher in the process—and returned back to her conversation, “I, uh, had a dream last night.”

Jongdae nodded slowly, “that usually happens when people sleep.”

“Jongdae!” Sloane grinned. “I’m being serious. I had a dream that… well, I can’t really remember what happened, but I remember my emotions, the urgency, the full moon, and fur… lots of it. Something is going to happen tomorrow, something out of the ordinary.”

“Are you psychic?”

“No, but I am incredibly intuitive. Also, I broke a vase yesterday!”

“What does that have to do with anything,” Jongdae questioned, truly concerned for the girl’s sanity.

Sloane grew distracted as the boy in front of her began answering a question. Jongdae watched as her eyebrows scrunched together and her eyes widened in realization, her eyes never leaving his neck.

“Earth to Sloane? You okay?” Jongdae waved his hand in front of her, causing her to come back to reality. “Did you just have a vision?”

“I… did I zone out?” Sloane seemed genuinely confused.

Jongdae pursed his lips. “You were staring at that kid as if he had a bug on his back.” Sloane tried to recall what she was thinking about, but came up empty.

“Great answer as always. Sehun, why don’t you elaborate on what Mr. Zhang was saying?” Professor Park said, staring at Sehun expectantly.

“Uh… I believe he covered it all, Professor?”

Sloane face palmed and Jongdae began his manic laughter again, causing both him and Sehun to get thrown out of class.

Sloane and Jongdae’s conversation was forgotten for the rest of the class.

~*~

“I made dinner!” Sloane’s voice was heard as soon as the door swung open. Six exhausted young werewolves stumbled into the kitchen with relief as the waft of stew overwhelmed their senses. The table was covered in plates and bowls and beside it stood Sloane with a nervous grin on her face.

“Sloane! You shouldn’t have!” Jongdae cried while Tao pulled her into a tight hug.

“You’re a life saver!” Chanyeol praised, quickly yanking a chair back to plop onto it. “Kai was promising us he’d cook and I really wasn’t in the mood for burnt kimchi fried rice.”

“Hey!” Kai barked, eyes slits with the promise of death as he glowered at Chanyeol.

“What? it’s true!” Chanyeol stuck his tongue out at his alpha.

“What did you make?” Sehun inquired, glancing around the crowded table. Kyungsoo smiled appreciatively at the girl before sitting down as well.

“Well, I cooked a stew with astragalus roots in it, some beef, a salad, and warm agrimony tea.”

Once everyone was settled, they all began eating, the moans of pleasure didn’t go unnoticed to Sloane, and she bit back a smile, pleased that her cooking skills were still up to par.

“This is, without a doubt, the best stew I’ve ever had!” Tao squealed.

“Sorry, Kyungsoo,” Kai grinned at the smaller boy, who just rolled his eyes and took a sip of his tea.

“His stew is still better than your kimchi fried rice,” Jongdae muttered and yelped as Kai kicked him underneath the table.

“What did you say was in the stew and tea?” Kai asked Sloane soon after, acting as if he had not just given Jongdae’s shin a nice purple bruise.

Sloane slurped some broth before answering his question, “astragalus roots and agrimony.”

“Are those the plants that you found in your books?” Kyungsoo asked.

She nodded, impressed that he remembered. “Yeah, astragalus helps increase energy, both the body and mind. It will help you with fatigue and unclear decisions. While agrimony helps keep away negative energy and spirits as well as keeping a level head.”

Kai’s chewing slowed as Sloane continued talking. He blinked at her, and she must have felt his gaze, because she looked up at him.

“Is this your way of helping us?” He questioned. She nodded and quickly broke eye contact, awaiting a scolding.

“Thank you, Sloane,” his voice was strained, but Sloane could hear his sincerity. “I should have known you would find a loophole.”

“Aw! Our Sloane is so smart!” Tao gushed with a full mouth. He ruffled the girl’s hair.

“Our…Our Sloane?” She choked. Tao began laughing, murmuring a ‘how cute’.

“Are you still anxious, Sloane?” Jongdae asked soon after.

She glared at him and Kyungsoo cocked an eyebrow, “why were you anxious?”

“I…” Jongdae began his manic laughter and Sloane threw a carrot at him. It shut him up immediately and he pouted, feeling betrayed that Sloane would use violence against him. “It’s nothing really. I promised that I wouldn’t get involved…”

“But?” Chanyeol pushed.

“But… be on guard tomorrow. I feel something will happen, something different.”

“Good different or bad different?” Sehun asked.

She shrugged, “that’s up for you to decide.”

“She also broke a vase,” Jongdae added.

“Jongdae!” Sloane shook her head at him, and his lips seemed to glue together. His eyes widened and he pushed away from the table, causing him and his chair to stumble backwards.

“Now you get why I’m always beating him up, “ Kai sighed as the table burst into laughter.

Sloane just scratched her head and drank her tea, “I really did break a vase though, is there any way I can get you to lend me six dollars?”

“Mmm!” Jongdae yelled from the floor where he was practically convulsing, pulling at the pink flesh of his lips in an attempt to rip them apart.

“Shut up!” Kai ordered.

“It’s your fault you’re in this situation!”

“You really would try to act that way towards a witch and not expect her to retaliate?”

“Hey! I’m not a witch! You want your lips merged too?!”

“No! I’m trying to defend you!”

Outside the moon shown bright, nearly full with the promise of change.

~*~

“I’m curious,” Jongdae murmured sleepily the next day. “Why are we watching a movie about a werewolf hunter?”

“Van Helsing also killed vampires,” Sloane informed, running her fingers through Tao’s brown hair where his head sat comfortably on her lap. He began purring like a kitten.

“I still don’t get why we are watching it, regardless of what he murdered,” Sehun scrunched his nose at a particularly violent scene.

Kyungsoo sighed, “it’s an attempt at distraction. But… it really isn’t working very well.”

“Where’s Kai?” Chanyeol asked.

“He couldn’t stomach the plot,” Kyungsoo shrugged.

“He’s not the only one,” Jongdae muttered.

“Will you guys just relax?” Sloane asked. “You’re transforming in less then twenty-four hours. Eat, rest, and enjoy a cool action flick with both a hot leading and supporting role and horribly depicted werewolves.”

“The werewolves are a bit much,” Kyungsoo relented with a soft chuckle.

“I wish I was that muscular when I shifted,” Tao yawned.

“Those vampires don’t seem that far off though…” Chanyeol mentioned, causing a chilling silence to take over.

Sloane let out a gust of breath and a few of the boys glanced over at her.

“Don’t worry about us too much, Sloane,” Jongdae said. He threw her a reassuring grin after sensing her distress.

“Yeah, we’re big boys,” Chanyeol added, flexing one of his biceps and sending the girl a wink.

“I know. I don’t even know why I’m so worried, honestly. I hardly know any of you.”

“It’s because we’re so handsome,” Tao provided, his eyes still closed.

Sloane lightly smacked his arm and rolled her eyes, “and so dumb.”

“We’ll be okay, Sloane,” Kyungsoo assured with a warm smile. “We always are.”

~*~  

“Look who has finally graced us with his presence!” Sehun yelled as Kai stumbled down the stairs a few hours later.

“Sloane made us have a werewolf marathon,” Tao informed his leader with a slight pout.

“All of them sucked, especially that shape shifting one,” Chanyeol added.

“Um, Blood and Chocolate was actually pretty decent. You have to admit that,” Sloane said. Chanyeol just shrugged.

“Well, I obviously haven’t missed much. It’s go time, you all ready?”

“But, the moon isn’t even all the way out yet!” Sloane said, her eyes widening with alarm.

Kai smirked, “we have to prepare some things. We shift pretty far from the house.”

“But—”

“It’s going to be fine!” Sehun drawled, throwing his arms around her shoulders. “You worry too much.”

“Can I at least—”

“Nope,” Kai interrupted, popping the P.

Sloane groaned with frustration, “then what am I supposed to do?”

Kai shrugged, “watch movies about witches. I heard that The Blair Witch Project is a good one.”

“Not cool,” Kyungsoo chastised as he walked past his best friend to grab some bags.

“What’s in the bags?” Sloane questioned, plopping back on the couch in defeat. She watched as Kyungsoo distributed the bags so that each boy got one.

“Snacks, extra clothes, first aid. Just things we will need if we change back early for whatever reason.”

“That happens?”

“Occasionally. It’s rare.”

“Usually, if we get wounded pretty badly or knocked unconscious, we’ll turn back to our human form,” Jongdae mentioned.

“Oh…”

“Oh great,” Chanyeol said, throwing his arms in the air. “Now she really is going to panic!”

Kai headed over to where Sloane was seated and knelt in front of her, “we do this every month. We will keep a look out for anything out of the ordinary, but until then, it will be just like always. You really need to chill, we know what we are doing.”

Sloane nodded, “I know, I know. Just be careful… all of you.”

Sehun saluted, “aye, aye, Captain.”

Kai rose to his feet, “I am the captain of this ship, and my first command is to head to the van!”

Sloane smiled as the boys said their farewells. Kyungsoo patted her shoulder, Tao gave her a slimy kiss on her cheek, while Jongdae kissed the top of her head. Chanyeol clipped her chin, Sehun rubbed her arm, and Kai walked out without so much as a wave—which was what Sloane was expecting.

“We’ll be back before you know it,” Sehun whispered to her before rushing to the others, closing the door behind himself. 
Now alone, Sloane let out a shaky breath and played with her gold necklace, hoping that their confidence would get them through the night.

~*~

“She is really worried for us,” Jongdae mentioned as they all piled into the van.

Chanyeol jumped into the driver’s seat, Kai in the passenger, while the other four climbed into the back.

“It’s nice,” Chanyeol admitted as he pulled out of the driveway. “She’s like a mother. It’s kind of cute watching her fret over us like that.”

The guys in the back nodded in agreement.

“I just hope she doesn’t do anything stupid,” Kai muttered, closing his eyes and sinking into his seat, mentally preparing himself for what was to come.

The ride was mostly silent, as they made their way to the outskirts of the forest. The moon seemed almost reachable as Chanyeol haphazardly parked and they all filed out. They were in a small circular clearing; the trees in the area were easily fifteen feet, hovering high above their heads.

“You all ready?” Kai asked, locking eyes with each member of his pack and receiving a nod from each. “Alright, here we go.”

It took a few moments, as the moon slowly began to reveal itself. The wolves became anxious, hobbling from foot to foot, claiming to have to pee, and telling stale jokes to pass the time. But soon, they began to feel the shift.

Chanyeol was the first to change. He yelped, startling the other five, as he tumbled to the ground. With his last bit of sanity, he quickly yanked his clothes off, not wanting to destroy them during the shift.

Jongdae whistled, “looking good, Channie!”

“Fuck off!” Chanyeol roared before screaming in agony. Sehun winced as Chanyeol’s arms twisted in odd angles. The others undressed quickly, knowing their turn was soon.

Kyungsoo was the next to begin shifting. Tao, Sehun and Kai quickly joining him. Jongdae blinked in surprise, Chanyeol was practically full wolf now, his russet fur blowing in the breeze, as his snout started to form.

“I’m not shifting,” Jongdae spoke from the corner of his mouth nervously, knowing none of the others were listening, too distracted by the pain. “Uh…” He glanced around and glared at the moon, “what are you doing?! Let’s go! I’m on the clock!”

Chanyeol was full wolf then and his fire orange orbs stared at Jongdae, almost mockingly.

“Oh, shut up!” Jongdae snapped. He cursed loudly right after, feeling the bones in his feet break and expand.

“There we go!” He cheered with his signature laugh as he began to shift.

The shift took around ten minutes to endure, and slowly, the boys changed into wolves. Once Jongdae’s white and black fur fully covered his new body, the six wolves howled, quickly taking off through the familiar forest.

Quick as lightening, the beasts raced through the land, leaping over fallen logs with their tongues lolling out their mouths. A few roughhoused, snapping at each other’s necks, while others chased after squirrels and other small animals. The sense of freedom they felt while they were wolves was indescribable. Although the shift was painful, being a wolf brought a joy that made it somewhat bearable.

A couple hours passed with the six pups playing and running around. Jongdae and Sehun were play fighting, Kai and Kyungsoo were racing one another, Tao got distracted by a frog, while Chanyeol was chasing his tail.

While running, Kai suddenly stopped, causing Kyungsoo to become distracted and hit a tree. After shaking it off he studied his leader. Kai was stiff as a board, the chocolate brown fur on his back slowly rising and his gold eyes glowing brightly against the darkness. He began growling menacingly, and that’s when Kyungsoo smelt it.

He whipped his head in the direction Kai was glowering and joined his low growling. Kai let out a quick bark, and soon, the other wolves joined the two. Immediately smelling a threat, they all snarled dangerously low.

Finally, the threat came into focus.

Another wolf, about as big as them, hesitantly made its way towards the group. It had ashy grey fur and sapphire eyes. It made it clear it wasn’t looking for a fight…

But he was on Kai’s territory.

With a sharp bark, Kai charged the lone wolf, his pack following immediately. They began fighting with the wolf, but he was stronger than anticipated. He was able to ward off Chanyeol and Sehun, and dodge Kyungsoo and Tao’s advances, but Kai surprised him, coming at him from his right and causing him to land on his side.

He immediately rolled onto his back in surrender, but Kai was seeing red. He dug his teeth into the beast’s flesh, causing him to howl in pain. Somehow he was able to get Kai off of him and bite him back in defense. Once free, he turned to run away, but was wounded, and wasn’t as fast as he could have been. Kai, Chanyeol, and Kyungsoo were hot on his heels, and once again pinned him onto the moist ground.

The exhausted animal closed his eyes, tired of fighting them off, and awaited the deathblow Kai was so eager to give.

Before he could finish the wolf off, Kai was knocked over. Kyungsoo and Chanyeol growled in surprise as Jongdae stood protectively in front of the other wolf. He huffed and shook his head. Kai got back on his paws and barked, ordering Jongdae to move, but the pup remained in front of the wolf, who was now unconscious.

Sehun and Tao joined the rest, ears perked with wonder, as they watched the confrontation.

Kyungsoo yelped in surprise as his attention was brought back to the strange wolf—who was a wolf no longer.

A boy around their age now lay were the wolf once had. Realization hit them all slowly—except for Jongdae, who had pieced everything together while Kai was blood hungry—and panic slowly took over the situation.

Another werewolf had shown up on their turf and approached them, probably asking to join them, and what did they do? They attacked him, nearly killing him in the process. Four out of seven wolves present were covered in blood, but the boy had bite wounds on his neck and belly, and blood was pouring profusely out of them. Almost without thinking, Kai dragged the boy unto his back and took off, rushing towards his house, to Sloane, who he knew could help the boy. He heard the pounding of his members’ paws against the rough earth as they followed him, some limping. It was a race against the sun, which was beginning to rise over the horizon.

It took about thirty minutes to get back to the house. Kai yipped once he saw the familiar wood of his home, but as soon as he left the clearing of the trees, he stumbled and fell, convulsing as his human form began to resurface.

One by one, the boys began to shift back to their human forms. Kai tried to crawl to the door, as he was still changing back with an unconscious guy still on top of his back. It was a struggle, but he was able to bang on the door, leaving blood stained handprints in his wake.

“Sloane!” He croaked, his voice was still laced with his wolf. “Sloane! Please help!”

Exhaustion got the better of him and he relented. He was aware long enough to see the door swing open and smiled with relief as a startled Sloane appeared before him.

~*~

Could it be possible for silence to be so loud it could startle someone awake? That’s what Kai’s first humane thought was as he jerked from his sleep. He was disoriented, still stuck between his wolf and human minds, but as he began blinking into focus, he realized that he was in fact human.

He sighed, running a hand over his face as the night’s events began surfacing. He was in his bedroom, clad in only a pair of black boxer briefs. He glanced at the clock on his nightstand—three forty-six. He checked the skin of his stomach, remembering he took a hit, but saw that his slight wounds were already closed in a fading pink.

He still had dried blood under his fingernails.

With a groan he climbed out of bed, trudging down to the living room. Once down there, he noticed that the television was off. Everything was off and it was silent. The silence made him feel incredibly guilty of his behavior, and he needed some type of distraction.

Chanyeol, Tao, and Kyungsoo were all in the living room, asleep. Tao on a couch, Kyungsoo siting up in the armchair, his chin resting on his bare chest, while Chanyeol’s tall frame was sprawled on the floor.

Kai headed over to the kitchen and saw Sehun sipping on a glass of milk. They locked eyes and Sehun bowed his head a bit in greeting, his face blank of any emotion.

“How long have you been up?” Kai asked the younger boy, his voice still rough with sleep.

Sehun shrugged, “about twenty minutes. The groaning woke me up.”

Kai cocked an eyebrow but didn’t question. “Where’s Sloane and….” He dropped his head, the guilt closing up his throat.

Sehun sighed, leaning back in his chair and drinking more of his milk, “in her room.”

Kai patted the wall before heading down the hall to his roommate’s room. After some hesitation, he knocked quietly.

“Come in,” he heard her say, and did as he was told.

Sloane was sitting on the floor in the middle of her room, Jongdae sat at her desk, looking the most serious he ever has, and on the bed laid the werewolf Kai tried to kill. He gulped, seeing him in the light. His wounds were closed, but the dried blood still remained.

“He was having trouble earlier, but he’s all healed now,” Sloane informed, her eyes never leaving the stranger’s sleeping form. “You got him pretty good.”

“I didn’t know,” Kai said.

“I know.”

“I did,” Jongdae admitted. His voice was hard with anger, and when he locked eyes with Kai, they were stern and shown a bright hazel—his wolf’s eyes. “I tried to get you to stop.”

“You did,” Kai sighed, looking down at his bare feet.

“There’s a question I can’t get out of my head, Kai. I keep wondering what would you have done if he hadn’t shifted back? Would you have killed me too? Just to get to him?”

“Jongdae! You know I wouldn’t.”

Jongdae shook his head, “how could you be so careless? How could you let your bloodlust take control over you like that? You weren’t you, man….”

Kai kept his head low like a scolded child, knowing he deserved this.

“You nearly killed someone, and for what? What reason, Kai? Because he was in your territory? Please, you don’t kill someone who approaches you with caution! You don’t deliver a deathblow to a wolf who has his fucking belly up in surrender!”

“Jongdae!” Sloane called. She spun around to see her usually casual and goofy friend. He was glaring at Kai, his chest heaving. “You’re going to wake him up.”

Jongdae stood up and walked out the room, but when he was in front of Kai he muttered, “I’m disappointed in you, Leader.”

Once he was out of the room, Sloane sighed and Kai sat where Jongdae was sitting prior.

“He’s right,” he confessed, running his fingers through his hair to yank on the strands. “What was I thinking?”

“You told me that it was dangerous,” Sloane began, after a small silence. “You being a wolf. You said that you don’t have complete control; that the wolf takes over. You saw a threat and proceeded to get rid of it.”

“But Jongdae is right. When he approached us, he was cautious, letting us know he didn’t want any trouble. Still, I attacked him. Even when he was surrendering, I was all too willing to end his life. I’ve never been like that before. It scares me.”

Sloane sighed, sitting a tad straighter. “I know this guy.”

“What?” Kai’s arms fell limply at his side.

“I mean, I don’t know know him, but I saw him earlier this week.”

Kai didn’t know what to say to that.

“At least you stopped,” Sloane continued. “At least you were able to get him here safely.”

“Not without him nearly bleeding out.”

“Well, it’s a good thing I’m here then, huh?”

They sat in silence, watching the boy sleep. He had pale skin and jet-black shaggy hair. His face was blessed with angelically soft features and his build was sturdy, yet lanky.

He began twitching in his sleep, and with a loud gasp, the boy sprang forward. His bare chest was shiny with sweat and was rising and falling quickly.

He sensed the two in the room and jerked his head towards them, “who are you!?”

“I was about to ask you the same thing,” Sloane murmured with a soft, yet dazzling smile.

The boy looked confused, his eyes wandering back and forth between Sloane and Kai as his nose flared.

Finally, his eyes widened with realization as they bored into Kai, “You…you tried to kill me!”

Kai winced. Of course, he would recognize his scent.

“I—”

“Don’t worry about him right now,” Sloane interrupted. “As a matter of fact, he’s leaving.”

“I am?”

“Yes,” She said sternly.

Hesitantly, Kai left the room, shuffling back to the living room where the others were sitting, awake and aware.

“We heard him. Is he awake?” Kyungsoo asked.

Kai met his eyes briefly before nodding.

“Come here,” Kyungsoo ordered, pulling his leader down on the chair with him. “We’re not angry with you, Jongin.”

“One of you are.”

“Jongdae will get over it,” the shorter boy assured. “Don’t beat yourself up, alright?” Kai didn’t answer, so Kyungsoo punched him slightly on the arm. “Alright?”

Kai nodded again and sniffed, not wanting to cry in front of his members.

~*~

“Do you remember me?” Sloane asked the werewolf, who had relaxed somewhat since his attempted murderer left the room.

He studied her and slowly nodded, “the girl… I bumped into you earlier. You dropped your books….”

“And you caught them all before they had the chance to even hit the ground. I should have realized it then, but I still don’t know much about werewolves.”

He blinked at her.

“I’m sorry about what happened last night. I’m not even sure they all know what happened, but I know they are all incredibly sorry. Especially the one that was in here. He’s the leader of this pack.”

“And what are you? You’re definitely not a werewolf.”

Sloane grinned, “That I am not. I’m not sure what I am. I hope you don’t mind, one of your wounds was infected, so I took the liberty to help with healing you.”

The werewolf reached up to his neck, but was met with smooth flesh. He sighed with relief and glanced back at the girl, “you’re overflowing my senses with your power. Are you a witch?”

“No,” she answered, mostly out of habit.

He stared at her in wonder.

“Are you hungry?” He shook his head. “Are you tired?” He shook his head again. “Are you going to tell me your name, at least?”

He finally broke into a smile, and it was beautiful, “Baekhyun. Byun Baekhyun.”

“Hello, Baekhyun. My name is Sloane Collins. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“You as well.”

“One of the members brought you some clothes… It’s not much, but it would probably be easier on the both of us if you were clothed.”

Baekhyun glanced down at himself and his face turned an endearing bright red.

Sloane chuckled and placed the pair of shorts and plain white shirt on her bed, “I’ll be in the living room. It’s right down the hall.”

He smiled at her appreciatively as she headed out.

Sloane fell on top of the couch with a huff. Sehun and Jongdae quickly joined the others in the living room and they all stared at her expectantly.

She groaned when she realized all eyes were on her, “what?”

“You know what,” Kai said.

“He’s awake…”

“We know,” Tao sang, pointing at his ears. “What happened? Is he alright?”

“He’s fine… A bit disoriented, but fine.”

“Did he tell you anything about himself?” Kai asked.

“His name is Byun Baekhyun, but that’s all the information I have on him. He’s changing right now, I told him to join us once he is dressed.”

It didn’t take long before Baekhyun was shuffling into view. He nervously glanced around the room at the werewolves before making his way to Sloane, sitting stiffly beside her. He stared at her expectantly, blinking innocently, but jumped as a few of the boys groaned.

“Not you too!” Chanyeol complained, throwing a couch cushion in the air.

“W—what?” The boy asked, utterly confused.

“She healed him,” Kai informed his pack, although none of them realized what that meant.

“Anyways,” Sloane began, demanding their attention. “I believe there is something that needs to be said before we continue any further.”

She gave Kai a meaningful look and he cleared his throat uncomfortably, “I’m sorry, Baekhyun. About last night, I didn’t mean… it was not my intention….”

“It’s alright,” Baekhyun stated with a small smile.

“It’s not!” Kai countered, finally working the nerve to meet the stranger’s gaze. “I was going to kill you.”

“But you didn’t,” Baekhyun said with a shrug. “That’s all that matters.”

The other boys apologized as well, and Baekhyun accepted them graciously.

“Now that that’s all out of the way,” Sloane said. She turned towards the boy, “how did you end up in Kai’s forest last night?”

Baekhyun shifted uncomfortably, “well, I’d been in town for a couple weeks. I knew there was a pack nearby and was waiting to approach you, but I didn’t know what to say. I decided that the full moon would be a good idea, because you would see me as a wolf and not question it… at least, that’s what I had hoped for.”

“Why did you want to meet us?” Kyungsoo asked, handing the boy a glass of water.

“I don’t belong to any pack,” Baekhyun informed once he chugged half the glass. “I’m alone.”

“He’s a rogue?” Tao asked, the pitch of his voice higher with fear. Sehun, Chanyeol, and Kai’s eyes changed into their wolfs’ at the idea of a rogue.

“Calm down!” Jongdae barked. “If he wanted to kill us, we would have a while ago. Not all rogues are vicious anyway.”

The three relaxed, and Jongdae rolled his eyes.

“What happened?” Sloane asked, visibly concerned. “Why are you alone?”

Baekhyun stared at his hands that were wrapped firmly around his cup, his knuckles were snow white from how tightly he gripped it, “I don’t know. I’ve always been.”

“Were you bitten?” Kai asked.

Baekhyun shook his head, “no. I was definitely born a werewolf, but I’m an orphan. The first time I shifted, it was in front of my foster parents. They were so terrified they kicked me out on the spot. I’ve been wandering ever since.

“I told you all I have been here for a few weeks. In that time, I watched you. You seemed like a nice pack, and I was envious—especially of you, Sloane.”

His eyes flickered over to her and he chuckled lowly—self-consciously.

Sloane tilted her head, “why?”

“Because,” his kept eye contact with the magical girl. “You all seemed like a family. I knew you weren’t a werewolf, yet they had accepted you. I wish I could feel accepted.”

“You can,” Sloane whispered, and she smiled reassuringly at him. “You can. With us. Right guys?”

She scanned the six pack mates. They were silent, for whatever reason. All of them avoided her gaze.

“Kai?” She tried. 

He scratched his chin and whined silently before meeting her gaze, “what? You want him to stay with us too? As if I have the room?”

The hostility in his voice caused Baekhyun to flinch and his shoulders to slump. 

Sloane was unperturbed, “If he doesn’t have anywhere else to stay, I don’t see why not. He’s been alone all his life. He needs brothers, Kai. He needs you guys.”

“But I—”

“He can stay at my place.” All heads snapped over to the giant who had been sitting quietly on the floor beside the television for most of the conversation.

“You don’t have to feel obligated to do so, Chanyeol,” Kai assured.

Chanyeol shrugged nonchalantly, “Why not? I highly doubt my parents would mind another werewolf in the house. I don’t have a spare room, but my bedroom has a lot of space, and I wouldn’t mind sharing.”

“You would do that?” Baekhyun breathed in awe, slightly overwhelmed by the hospitality the giant shown.

The two locked eyes and Chanyeol nodded firmly, “I know what it’s like to be an outcast, Baekhyun. No one should have to deal with being a werewolf alone.”

“That’s our little Delta!” Sehun gushed, falling on top of Chanyeol. The two began wrestling on the floor, knocking over a lamp in the process.

“Are you alright with adding another member to your pack, Kai?” Sloane asked the tense alpha.

Kai ran through the events that happened not even twenty-four hours ago. Of him attempting to take Baekhyun’s life. He had no idea what the pup had been through prior to that night, and now the guilt seemed to pile onto his skin like dirt, making him feel grimy and gross.

He gasped for air and looked up, looked at Baekhyun—at the earnest and hopeful look in his eyes—and knew without a doubt, that he wanted him in his pack, “any werewolf is welcome. I’m the alpha of this pack, Kim Jongin, but I go by Kai. From this day on, I will be your alpha, Byun Baekhyun. Welcome to our pack.”

All the boys hooted and hollered. Sehun ran over and ruffled Baekhyun’s hair, yelling incoherently in his ear. Sloane clapped along, a giant smile on her face, but it was dim compared to the one on Baekhyun’s.

“Now that that’s all settled,” Sloane said once the excitement died down. “Will you all please get dressed?! I’ve seen enough naked bodies to last me a lifetime!”

“Hey!” Sehun huffed. “We’re all wearing underwear!”

“I’m sick of all the skin! Are you all not cold!?”

“You know werewolves run hot!”

“That doesn’t mean you have to act as if you think you are hot enough to walk around this house half naked!”

“Whatever, Sloane! Don’t act like you don’t like it!”

“Ew! Sehun, don’t touch me!”

The day ended on a high note, the boys’ surviving another full moon.

3. The Sullen Siblings

The halls were silent.

Almost eerie, considering the time. Byun Baekhyun gulped as his eyes skittered around the dimly lit hall.

His ears perked, noticing the small explosions of heels on tile and he sighed from the familiar sound.

“Are you nervous?” Her voice smooth, sweet, comforting. He couldn’t help but smile at just the mere thought of her, but she was there in his presence, an eyebrow lifted as she studied him.

He cleared his throat and wiped his sweaty palms on his pant legs, “is it that obvious?”

Sloane slowly shook her head, “no. Not for others, at least. Come.”

She grabbed his hand and led him down the hall into the office. It was stuffy and smelled slightly moldy, but Baekhyun tried his best not to cringe.

He hated school.

When he actually attended school, he was bullied relentlessly, but he had faith that this school would be different. He had faith in his pack, in Sloane. Hence why he was allowing her to drag him into the office.

His pack. He still couldn’t believe after nineteen years, he was finally able to say those words.

Apparently, Tao is ridiculously rich, and he begged his parents to yank some strings so that they could get Baekhyun enrolled. As before mentioned, their university was prestigious and private, only accepting the best of the best—also known as the rich of the rich—so it came to no surprise that getting Baekhyun in wasn’t going to be an easy feat.

Unless, of course, you’re Huang Zitao.

Baekhyun couldn’t even feign his surprise by Tao’s generosity. Tao seemed rather… Detached. Unbothered by everything. Baekhyun would even go as far as to classify the tall werewolf as frightening. But when he brought it up to Sloane the night before, she laughed, genuinely confused by his assessment.

“Well, if that’s what you see, it definitely won’t last for long. Trust me.”

The two new students headed over to the desk where the principal’s assistant sat and she printed out Baekhyun’s class schedule.

Once they were out, he kept staring at the piece of paper in awe. Sloane noticed the slight shake of his hand and grinned.

“Would ya look at that? We have biology together.”

Baekhyun’s head snapped up to stare at her, his expression still in that dreamy state of disbelief. “We have a class together?”

She nodded; getting the reaction out of him she wanted. “Yup. Chanyeol is also in that class.”

The sparkle in his eyes nearly tripled.

But then the bell rang.

Doors sprang open and hoards of students trailed out, flooding the halls.

Baekhyun’s nerves got the best of him; flashbacks of his brief time in school making him break out in a cold sweat as shoulders bumped into him. He was instantly aware of his clothes and hair and height and everything he ever was insecure about and he could feel a panic attack crawling up his throat.

A warm soft hand slid into his damp one, tightly gripping his limb and bringing his attention to Sloane.

“You’re okay. You’re here with me.”

“And me,” a deeper voice called and Baekhyun was surprised he could hear it over all the chaos around him.

The hall in front of them seemed to part and about five feet away, Kai, Chanyeol, Tao, and Sehun were making their way towards Baekhyun and Sloane. Kai was the one Baekhyun heard and it made some sense now, because people were quieting down as the boys walked.

Sloane had been at the university for about two weeks now and in that time she had sensed that the boys who she was starting to consider her friends were pretty popular. But, she could admit, she was very ignorant to it all—for there were more important matters to her. But now she was seeing it all first hand and wow how could she not have noticed it before? The way girls—and guys—were not only giving them space, but also how they all giggled and gushed once the guys passed them. Not to mention the ogling….

They were viewed as gods here.

She couldn’t help but to wonder where that put her in the college hierarchy.

It wasn’t looking too good.

She shook away her thoughts and the sense of impending doom and glanced at Baekhyun, who would be a part of all this attention in less than a minute.

He seemed to gather what was coming for him, and his free hand twitched at the hem of his uniform jacket. Sloane could tell how uncomfortable Baekhyun felt in it, as if he were not worthy of such things, and it hurt her soul. She was going to do everything in her power to make sure that beautiful smile of his never faded.

Kai and the gang finally met up with the two and stopped before them.

“Did you get your schedule?” Chanyeol asked Baekhyun.

Baekhyun nodded and practically threw the piece of paper at his new roommate. Chanyeol grinned at the action, but didn’t mention it as his eyes wandered down the sheet. He wasn’t the only one with wandering eyes. A lot of the students were now noticing Baekhyun, and he felt each stare penetrate him like a knife.

“We have biology together,” Chanyeol said. Handing him back the paper.

“I know. Sloane told me.”

“Did she also tell you that you’re sweating like a stripper in church?” Tao commented with a slightly disgusted look on his face.

“I….”

“Leave him alone,” Sloane hissed, narrowing eyes on the taller boy. “It’s his first day and you all are giving him more attention than he needs.”

“Well he better get used to it,” Sehun sighed. “It’s not going to get any easier.”

He sauntered passed them, heading over to his next class.

“He’s right,” Kai murmured to Baekhyun. “The students here… they have nothing better to do with themselves, I guess.”

“Ya’ll are hot and mysterious,” Sloane shrugged. “Of course you are popular.”

Kai scowled.

“You think we’re hot?” Chanyeol smirked, eyes glittering flirtatiously.

Sloane shrugged, unfazed. “I have eyes, Yeol.”

Chanyeol stiffened at the name, “you… you gave me a nickname!”

Kai rolled his eyes, “come on. The bell is about to ring.”

The four dispersed. Baekhyun, Sloane, and Chanyeol had their shared biology class next so they headed there.

The minute walk felt like an eternity to Baekhyun. The whole time his eyes flittered around the hall, taking in everything. A lot of people they passed whispered to one another, gazes trained on the three of them. The hot and popular Park Chanyeol followed by the mysterious new foreigner girl and an equally as attractive new boy. Baekhyun didn’t know how to take the ‘being attractive’ thing, so he decided not to let it get to him.

He also didn’t really like the way people were talking about Sloane.

She told him that his strong need to be around her was a byproduct of her power. That a slight bond had been made between the two of them and it would wear off in a week or so, but he wasn’t so sure. Since the first time he saw her, he knew he wanted to be around her. She had a calmness about her, a gentleness that made him like her.

But he seemed to be the only one.

Everyone they passed was either curious about her or completely disgusted. It made his wolf furious that people were so quick to judge someone they obviously knew nothing about.

Chanyeol must have sensed it, because he glanced at the smaller boy with wide eyes that grew impossibly bigger once he saw the glowing deep ocean blue of his irises.

“Whoa, man!” He whispered so that no one else could hear.

Baekhyun’s eyes snapped shut as he tried to control his wolf. Chanyeol’s big hand came up to rub his back encouragingly and after a short moment, Baekhyun’s melted chocolate colored eyes returned.

“Thought we lost you there for a moment,” Chanyeol said. His face was drawn together with concern as he took in his member’s appearance.

“What happened?” Sloane asked as they slipped into class right before the bell rang.

“The way they were talking about you….” Baekhyun locked eyes with the girl and she gulped. The blue was slowly bleeding into his iris.

“They talk,” Chanyeol dismissed, loosening his already lazy tie even more. “That’s what they do.”

“Not about Sloane,” Baekhyun growled, baring his teeth.

Chanyeol raised an eyebrow, then lifted his hands in surrender. “Alright, Baekhyun. You’re right. Let’s sit down, okay?”

Baekhyun was fighting his wolf again and it caused his senses to skyrocket. Sloane bit her lip in worry as he remained standing in the front of the classroom, the teacher introducing him to the rest. His neck was tight with strain and his eyes were closed in case they weren’t the right color.

He bowed quickly once he was introduced and made his way next to Sloane, who immediately grabbed his hand under their shared table.

The bond between them flared, and Baekhyun gasped as energy ran up his arm.

“You’re alright now,” Sloane grinned mischievously. Leaving Baekhyun stunned, but his wolf was dead silent, and he sighed with relief. “Now listen to the teacher and do good in school, okay? We didn’t get you enrolled so that you can scare everyone.”

“Yes ma’am.”

~*~

“I haven’t even been here the whole day and I’m exhausted,” Baekhyun pouted. His backpack was already trailing behind him on the floor and his jacket was hanging off his shoulders.

“It’s lunch time,” Jongdae began in a warning tone. The two had calculus together which was their class right before lunch break. “You better brace yourself. Chanyeol told me about your wolf coming out this morning.”

Baekhyun groaned, ruffling his dark hair. “I don’t think he will be making another appearance today, but—” he took a deep breath in front of the wide doors to the cafeteria. “Alright. I’m ready.”

Jongdae chuckled and pushed the doors open. The dull hum of multiple conversations exploded and Baekhyun shuddered before entering the giant room behind his pack member.

Out of all the boys, Jongdae was definitely the most caring to Baekhyun. He was sure it had something to do with being the only one without a guilty conscious for attacking him the first full moon together. Jongdae has felt like an older brother for the past days, helping him with whatever issues he has had and always asking him if he is all right. Baekhyun has been thankful.

They grabbed a tray and loaded it with food before Jongdae led Baekhyun to a table nearly filled with familiar faces.

“How is it going so far?” Tao asked curiously.

Baekhyun bit his lip. “Besides nearly going wolf a couple times, it hasn’t been too bad. The classes don’t seem too difficult.”

“Has anybody tried talking to you?” Kyungsoo asked.

Baekhyun shook his head. “No. But I have been getting a lot of stares. It makes me nervous, I don’t like it.”

“I told you earlier that you need to get used to it,” Sehun said. “Hanging out with us, well, we get that a lot.”

“We’re kind of like celebrities,” Jongdae revealed with a relaxed shrug.

“Celebrities?” Baekhyun repeated, eyeing the cafeteria and locking eyes with more people than he would like. “I don’t know….”

[hallelujah-lockandload]

Sweet Venom 2

Here is a link to the first chapter on here

The Wattpad link that has more chapters. I take a while to post here since AO3 and Wattpad give me more feedback :c

The first three days of school went by fast which is nice. Now it's Friday which means sleepover with Mikey! It's something we’ve always done the first week of school but also because we are literally best friends and my parents don’t care enough to realize I’ve slept over his house multiple times. The Way’s mom is always really sweet and makes us leave the door open cause we’re “teenagers and teenagers are horny”. She didn’t say that to us but I already know that's what she thinks and I’m also the only girl allowed to stay the night at all at their house unless it's a group sleepover.

I got up as usual and dressed in some black bottoms today and a smashing pumpkins tee. Walking down stairs to an empty kitchen is always nice, it means I get to take my time and actually be somewhere in peace that isn’t my room. I got breakfast ready and sat at the table scrolling through my phone texting Mikey.

y/n/n: Sup loser.

Mikey: morning punk. 

    u excited for tonight?!

y/n/n: OF fuckin course!! 

    Watchin movies and complaining and catching up

    Even though i see you all the time

Mikey: I still look forward to our yearly first week of school Shit Talk Sleepover

y/n/n: SAaaammme!

Mikey: Gotta watch some shitty hs movie this time

cause its your last first week shit talk

y/n/n: I don’t know mikes I still got college and youll be a senior

Mikey: tru

As I ready Mikey’s “tru” I finish my breakfast and then head up stairs to finish getting ready. I put on my usual makeup and brushed my teeth. My hair looks decent so I’m leaving it, no one will tell I didn’t brush it unless they run their fingers through it so whatever. As I reach the bottom of the stairs I hear a car honk outside my house. I go to the door and peek out and there’s Mikey and Gerard to pick me up. I wave and go grab my shoes and check my phone to see if Mikey said they were coming at all cause I didn’t think they'd be here. 

Mikey: we be picking u up early loser. (timestamp 5 minutes ago)

Of course the one time I don't check my phone so they have to wait a few minutes for me to tie my hightops and grab my bag. I lock the door as I close it behind me and head to the back seat of Gerard’s kind of beat up black Corolla. It's an older used car but it works for getting us all places. 

“Morning guys” I say, throwing my backpack into the back seat and stepping in.

“Morning y/n/n. You were late” Mikey said while Gerard just hummed in response to my greeting. I closed the door and off we went.

“Yeah well I didn’t see your text jerk” I said hitting Mikey’s shoulder lightly. It's too early for being rough. Mikey just laughed and we rode in silence to the school with Gerard’s playlist coming through the speakers.

~ 

The school day passed slower today than the last few. Probably because I was excited for the sleepover tonight with Mikey. I looked over at him in math and it seemed like he felt the same way. Once classes were out for the day I went to grab my stuff from my locker.

“Hey cutie” I turned to look at Patrick.

“Where’ve you been all day, jerk?” I laughed as I pushed him away from me. 

“Places…” He smirked turning to lean against the lockers. “Mostly hiding from Carry which meant I couldn't hang with you cause I knew she would look for me there.”

“Dude.” I said staring at him.

“I know, I know. I just need to find her a new boy to crush over”

“Fast,” I added, closing my locker.

“Hey guys!” I turned to see Pete and Mikey heading our way. 

I leaned over to Patrick, “I'd say point out Pete to her but that would just be cruel.” I laughed and so did he.

“What are you two idiots giggling about?” Pete said, stopping next to us.

“Nothing.” Patrick and I said together. We looked at eachother and just cracked up even more. 

“Ugh” Pete groaned and turned to Mikey, “Control your bestfriend.”

“You first” Mikey responded with a smirk. 

Pete rolled his eyes, “Lets get the fuck out of here, schools been out for like 10 minutes.”

“Oh that's so long” I said sarcastically as I fixed my backpack on my shoulder.

“Shut up.” Pete said smiling as we started to head out of the hallway and make our way to the front of the school. 

“Hey Mikey how's operation Sweet Poison going?” Patrick said over my head.

“I’m working on it.” Mikey mumbled giving Patrick a glare.

“Oooooh! What's Sweet Poison?! Let me help!” I said turning to Mikey.

“You can’t help cutie, it's a secret” Patrick said next to me.

“Yuup. Only us boys get to know” Pete said. I glared at Mikey who was looking everywhere but me. Looks like I’ve got some secrets to get out of Mikey now. Mikey keeping a secret from me is new and only a bit concerning. 

“Alright,” I said, shrugging and turning back around, “Keep your secrets. I’ll just assume it's about your crush then.” I smirked as I walked over to the cars seeing Gerard leaning on the hood of his car talking to Frank and Ray.

“Do not,” Mikey rushed up behind me.

“Yeah it's actually not concerning Mikey’s crush for once. Plus isn't that one called operation Heart Eyes?” Patrick said.

“Oh yeah!” Pete nearly shouted, “Fuckin forgot about that. Gotta get moving on plans for that.” Mikey’s face was turning red, which is ahh sweet revenge for keeping me out of the loop.

“Hey guys” Ray said, waving as we got to Gerard’s car.

“Sup Toro-saurus” I smiled at him as he pulled me into a side hug laughing at my usual greeting. 

“So any plans for tonight?” Pete asked the group.

Frank and Ray had a consensual nope and Gerard said sort of. But question? How do you sort of have plans? That's so weird but no one questions it. Patrick says how his only plan is to come up with a plan to get rid of his ex-girlfriend Carry. We all laughed at him but also gave sympathy cause who knew she was the obsessive type? 

“Y/n and I are having our annual first week of school shit talk sleepover” Mikey said.

“We are going to roast all of you behind your backs” I added with a smirk.

“Thats so fuckin rude” Pete said knocking his shoulder against me chuckling. The others laughed lightly too. We chatted for a little while longer before everyone was sick of being on campus and there was almost no line of cars trying to leave the campus. We said our goodbyes and parted ways. 

“You guys can drop me off at my house and I’ll walk over later. I gotta pack for tonight and make sure my parents remembered.” I said as we drove back to our houses. Thankfully Mikey only lives like a five minute walk from my house so I never feel weird walking there even at night. 

“Okay” Mikey said. Gerard just hums and continues to drive. He never talks to me much. I literally have no clue what happened to make him not like me. We have been in the same grade since like 6th grade, I mean he’s older than me cause he got held back in like elementary school but Mikey and I are 90% sure its cause he didn’t want to leave Mikey behind. Which is actually really sweet. But Still! Why the hate? Or dislike. Whatever it is, it kind of makes me sad because we probably could be awesome friends like Mikey says. One day I’m going to figure it out. Or like ask Mikey what the fuck is up. But its not at the top of the to do list just yet. I’m fine with the awkward ignoring for now. Well I mean… for the past 3 years. This will be 4 if things don’t change.

We pull up to my house and I thank them both for the ride, “What time am I coming over Mikes?” I say before closing the door.

“Uuhhhhh idk 7?” Mikey said looking over his shoulder at me.

“Did you just say idk out loud?” I ask him, chuckling with a smirk.

“Shut up. See you later bye.” Mikey says turning around. I laugh and say bye again then close the car door. I walk up the steps, unlock the door and turn around and wave at the boys goodbye to signal I am safe and can get in my home. They always wait to make sure I’m safe, Mikey is a good friend.  As I step in I drop my backpack on the table by the door and kick my shoes off before heading to the kitchen to get a snack. I plop down in a chair as I eat some dried fruit and sip at my water while sending a text to my mom telling her I was having a sleepover tonight. 

Mom: Okay. Be safe. Love you.

Y/N: I will. Love you too.

I put my phone down to finish my snack and think about what movie I wanted to make Mikey watch tonight. Maybe Carrie, I mean it's fitting since Patrick was talking about his ex Carry. Or maybe Mean Girls cause it's a classic. Maybe even High School Musical just to fuck with Mikey. We shall see. I smirk to myself thinking of how mean I’m feeling like being to Mikey. I mean he is keeping a secret from me soo.

Once my snack is done I head upstairs to change into more comfy clothes for the day. But I kinda realize I should shower first cause school is fricken gross. So I grab a pair of black leggings and a baseball tee cause uhh no one needs to see my butt thanks, even if it is just Mikey and Gerard. I spend probably too long in the shower singing and just enjoying the heat but it's not like I don’t have the time. After I get out I brush out my wet hair and throw it back up in a dry towel to help get more moisture out. (real tip right there, double towel dry) I pull on my clothes and head out of the bathroom back to my room. I grab a bag from my closet for sleepovers and pack some pjs, an oversized New Jersey Devils shirt and a pair of shorts along with a pair of pants cause sometimes Mikey’s room is a fricken ice box. Then I grab some shorts and a shirt for the next day just in case we decide to get dressed and go somewhere. 

After I finish packing I head back to the now aired out bathroom to dry my hair and put some much needed moisturizer on my face. No makeup cause it's Mikey and we’ve seen the worst of each other in the past that I don’t ever feel pressured to wear makeup around him. Plus my skin has been looking nice lately. I head back to my room and throw myself onto my bed. The clock next to me reads 4:15, I’ve got enough time to try and take a nap so I can stay awake later tonight. I set an alarm on my phone for 6:15 since I know I might just end up watching tv or playing on my phone but I need to make sure to eat a snack because pizza probably won't happen till 8. I lay down, put on some calming music before setting my phone down and closing my eyes for a bit. 

~

The sound of chimes wake me up. Where the heck am I? What time is it? I look around and realize I’m still in my room. Damn I actually fell asleep, who knew I could nap? I turn off my alarm and slowly pull myself up out of bed. I rub my eyes and grab my bag and some socks to bring down stairs with me so I don’t have to come back up after my snack. I walk down the stairs to a semi dark house. The sun is going down and neither of my parents are home. Cool. I turn the porch light on and drop my bag and socks off at the front door before heading to the kitchen for some snackage. 

y/n/n: we still good for 7??

I text Mikey to double check. Sometimes he forgets when we are supposed to hang out and goes to do something before realizing he’s now late for our hang out. I grab a pb and j sandwich from the fridge and sit on my phone for a bit as I chill down stairs. I check the time after my second pb and j… they are so good I can’t just have one! It’s 6:50 which means I’m allowed to go over and bother Mikey early. I check my phone and still no reply so I send a quick text letting him know that I’m on my way. 

Grabbing my socks and shoes I sit on the floor by my bag taking my time just in case Mikey says not to go over yet. Once my black vans are on I stand up grabbing my bag and keys and checking my phone one more time. It's 6:53 and still no response so I’m heading over anyway so I can bug him. I head out my door, locking it behind me and taking a shortcut through my grass to the side walk. It's only a five minute walk and the sun is setting so it's still nicely lit, plus our neighbors usually stay inside at this time cause it's like family dinner time. I head to the Way house and check my phone at least three more times but still nothing. What a bitch. I think at Mikey, if only telepathy worked with us. Coming up on the Way residence I see the down stairs lights on but Mikey’s light isn’t on in his room. He better be downstairs and not out of the house right now. 

I knock on the door but there is no answer which means Mikey isn’t downstairs or he has headphones on again. I use my spare key, Thank you Mrs. Way, and open the front door.

“Honey I’m home” I say sarcastically as I close the door. Still nothing. I peek around into the living room and no one is there. Odd cause the lights are on. The Way parents are out at dinner at the moment with some clients or something is what Mikey told me during Music Theory today. Next I head to the kitchen but still nothing. I head over to the staircase to go find Mikey upstairs.

CRASH

I jump at the sudden sound nearly dropping my phone, my heart racing and I have to take a moment tocatch my breath. I look toward the basement door that leads to Gerards room. I hope he’s alright. I look back up the stairs and  the nonexistent light of Mikey’s bedroom. Mikey’s light wasn’t on, maybe he’s with Gerard in the basement and they are just messing around. I leave my bag at the bottom of the stairs and kick my shoes off too before heading to the basement door. Why are basements always so creepy? Or is it cause no one is up here that it makes it worse than usual. I’ve been in Gerard’s room before but only to borrow comics and Mikey took me down there. I open the door and listen for a moment before doing anything. There’s just silence and if I didn’t know this house as good as my own I would be feeling way more scared but I still feel like I’m in a horror movie right now. I open my phone up and dial 911 just in case I’m about to be fucking murdered in my best friends basement. 

The lights are on down there which is better than anything else so I start to head down the stairs slowly. As I make it down the stairs I scan the room for the boys hoping they are just fucking with me and are trying to scare me. Reaching the bottom step I look around and notice a person laying on the floor by the open window. 

“Oh shit! Gerard?!” I ran over to him once I recognized his black greasy hair. He’s slumped on his side and groans as I approach him. “Are you okay?” I reach out and grab his shoulder turning him to lay on his back so I can see his face better. I suck in a breath as I notice blood dripping down his chin and also the dark stain at the top of his blue sweatshirt which is probably more blood. 

“Oh fuck!” I jump up and run to his bathroom grabbing a towel and running back crashing down next to him to stop the bleeding wherever the hell it's coming from as fast as I can. I press the towel gently to his face to try and wipe away some blood when his eyes snap open. Oh shit. In an instant I’m on my back, wind knocked out of me and towel still in my left hand with Gerard pinning my arms to the side of me while hovering over me with red eyes.

[nancythebisexualslutwheeler]

Reddie Tutor!AU

So what if we do a tutor!Eddie AU, where everything is #normal, it’s just shitty, normal HS. So Eddie is a junior and he’s on the track team and he’s little but his speed makes up for it.

He’s smart as hell, for real. In all AP classes and honors. I mean in math they only offer AP Calc as the highest option- which is what you need to pass twelfth grade. It’s not hard, even though it’s AP, the school just needed the extra funding. In Derry, everyone needed extra money.

So he’s smart and does track and that’s about all his mom allows him to do. She barely allows track, but the insurance money from his dad’s death is running out and words like scouts and scholarships made their mark. She never left the house of course, so it was nice for him to be able to have something to himself. It had taken a lot of convincing, but finally it was his. And then his principal who’d wanted him to apply to their student council and run for class president and more things that Eddie’s mother wouldn’t allow him to do, asks him to be a tutor. He will need to dedicate one afternoon after school and his Saturday mornings. He only has two friends, Bev and Ben, who are dating each other, so no one is too worried about him. Not all the time at least. (That’s mean. They’re good friends, he’s just bitter.)

He accepts the job without even asking who he’s tutoring. Mainly because tutoring means they’d have to have a chance of passing the class. Richie Tozier does not have a chance in hell at passing the class.

Cue mean girls style montage... let me tell you about Richie Tozier. He’s a dick. He’s cocky and rude and dirty and he’s 19 and this will be his second go at his senior year. So no, he has no chance of passing.

He can’t very well say no after he’s said yes so on Wednesday afternoon, he’s in the library, in the back corner, to avoid being seen caught dead with the loser, when Richie shows up.

Yadayada when Richie sees him he has a field day.

But eventually the two find an uneasy relationship.

So I’m here for when:

***

Richie gets a D on his first test because it’s not an F!!!! And he pats Eddie so hard on the shoulder he’s sure he’ll have a bruise.

***

One day Richie is staring at Eddie. His legs more precisely.

“What are you wearing?”

“Track shorts,” he holds a leg out. It’s obvious. They’re purple.

Richie rolls his eyes,

“No shit.”

“Why?”

“Practice after this.”

He nods...

“Um, what kind of-“

“Track.”

“Oh no shit.”

“You run?”

He snorts,

“I only run from cops.”

                                             ***

  “Hey I can’t meet on Saturday this week.”  

“Why?” Richie demands. He looks a bit frantic, their test is on Monday. But Eddie also knows it probably has to do with the way Richie put his hand on Eddie’s leg as he drove them home. Eddie had reassured him with a small smile, but he figured the older boy still needed validation.

“I’ve got a meet.”

Richie raises an eyebrow,

“Yeah,” Eddie itches the back of his head.

“Where?”

“Gravesville.”

“Oh.”

“I have one on Friday night too though. Here.”

And Richie makes some dumb excuse about being busy and yet on. Friday night he’s out there. Well, at the bottom of the bleachers right before the fence and he watches Eddie and smokes a cigarette.

And Eddie is so shook and ends up running over to him after like wtf? And Richie’s wearing a leather JACKET and they lean against the fence and chat and Richie lights a cigarette and Eddie can’t take his eyes off of his mouth and then Richie offers him some and Eddie’s like ... ahhh.. but then does and chokes and Richie’s like alright my innocent bon bon, none for you.

                                                          ***

Then Richie starts bringing them coffee on Saturday’s. He’s got a new job. He always makes Eddie’s coffee perfectly. Like he’s memorized it or something. A hazelnut vanilla latte with less oat milk (he’s lactose intolerant) than espresso and three sugars. Sue him, he likes his coffee sweet.

Richie is vegan. Eddie about falls over when he starts talking about the environment and passionately. The mistreatment of people of color comes up and the fact those words just came out of stoner Richie Tozier’s  mouth is making him rethink everything he knew about the world.

                                                           ***

Richie fucking lifts weights which wouldn’t be a problem if he arms weren’t so fucking buff.

                                                       ***

Okay the thing is Eddie knows he shouldn’t like Richie, but’s he’s just so damn attractive that it’s hard. His dark hair and beaming blue eyes and ridiculous glasses that happen to work for him. He has a goddamn hoop nose ring and he’s always biting at his chapped lips. He has a chest tattoo (Eddie has only seen what pokes out of the too tight, stretched out necks of his t shirts. He wears assorted band tees or white T-shirts that ride up when he stretches his arms over his head and shoves off the treasure trail that Eddie wants to lick.

So anyway the first time Richie takes off the flannel he’s wearing over a T-shirt, Eddie balks at the artfully decorated tree on his arm. It’s an elegant oak tree with autumn leaves adorning the branches. It’s... exquisite, and before Eddie can help himself, he’s reaching out to touch it. He stops himself before he does and when he looks up, Richie is smiling at him. He offers his arm and Eddie traces the tree,

“It's beautiful.”

“Well thanks Eddie spaghetti,” he says.

Eddie realizes he’s still touching his arm and quickly pulls away.

                                                      ***

It only takes a few times of mentioning his mom before Richie asks. Richie is trying to offer to drive him home after a study session runs late and it’s dark.

“You’re not walking home.”

“It’s fine, I promise.”

“You scared of my driving skills?” Richie swings his keys around his index finger.

“No, I mean yes, of course, but my mom’ll flip.”

“You say that a lot. What’s her deal?”

Eddie pales,

“Nothing. Just overprotective.”

They head to the door, Richie still insisting on a ride, and when they step out into the chilly fall air, Eddie wraps his windbreaker around himself tighter and then Richie offers again, knowingly.

“You have to drop me off around the corner.”

Richie looks at him curiously and then nods,

“Of course. Can’t have mom seeing you with big bad huh?”

“Yeah, you’re not meeting the parents material, huh?”

“That’s what they tell me,” he shrugs, “As long as they let me sneak into their bedroom.”

Eddie makes a face. Girl’s rooms.

***

One Saturday Richie doesn’t show up. He thought they were over this, Richie ditching. He hadn’t even texted. So Eddie is annoyed. No pissed. Because it’s 8am and Richie isn’t even there to give him a coffee. So he calls because he’s fuming.

Richie sounds like shit,

“Hello? Eddie? Wait. What day is it? Fuck. Eddie I am so sorry. I’m sick as fuck.”

Speaking of which, Eddie doesn’t remember seeing him in class on Thursday.

“You couldn’t call? Text?”

“Bro, I’ve been in bed for days. I’m about to die of dehydration, my parents are out of town and I can barely manage to get out of bed to pee so no, I couldn’t text.”

Eddie pauses. Hesitates. He does it to be nice. That’s all.

“What’s your address? I can bring you a few things.”

“That’s unnecessary.”

“I’m not, I’m not taking a no for an answer.”

Eddie buys too much but he can’t stop himself. About three kinds of cold and flu meds, Tylenol, cough syrup, OJ and sprite and saltines. A couple of magazines. He’s pathetic.

Richie answers the door looking like death and Eddie is Lowkey in love because he looks like a muffin. (A very sick muffin) but a muffin nevertheless.

                                                         ***

Richie returns the favor by inviting Eddie over for a movie and pizza night. He thinks about it because they’re not friends. But Richie seems sincere and he did take care of Richie. He’d changed his bed sheets and everything. They haven’t mentioned it.

So Richie’s house is nice and he has a thirteen year old sister who is way cooler than Eddie was at 13. Anyway Richie orders pizza and he orders Eddie a regular pizza but he wants to try Richie’s because it looks good. And he does and it’s good and Richie just grins and turns on some dumb Netflix movie.

They absolutely do not cuddle, but Eddie sits a touch closer than he needs to and Richie’s arm ends up draped behind him on the couch and it’s nice and goddammit, Eddie is gay for Richie Tozier.

                                                      ***

Richie never seems to tire of him, or make any move to stop their tutoring sessions even when he gets a B on their latest test.

                                                   ***

One day it’s raining and Richie is sitting across from him and parts of his white shirt are see through. And his chest is hairy and Eddie is in to it.

                                               ***

Richie’s birthday comes and goes and Eddie brings him a single German chocolate cupcake complete in a container and everything.

Richie doesn’t stop absolutely beaming. He eats the whole thing and fawns over Eddie.

“It was so good. Best thing I’ve ever put in my mouth,” he says with a wink.

“Richie,” he complains.

“Scouts honor,” he salutes, “the very best.”

“Gross!”

                                                       ***

So idk what happens but somehow they’re alone together, maybe in like a bedroom. Richie’s got his big hands open in his lap, palm up, and Eddie is firmly pressed against him and Eddie nudges Richie,

“You’re a lot cooler than I thought you’d be.”

“Aww, you too Eddie spaghetti.”

“Puh-lease fuck off.”

“Never.”

Eddie nudges him,

“Promise?”

Richie looks down at him then,

“Promise.”

Eddie stares at him and licks his lips.

Richie leans down slowly, giving Eddie plenty of time to move away. He doesn’t.

[idiosyncrasy-at-its-finest]

Text Me (Inc.) + a mini blog post

Looking through my google drive again, looking for post-worthy bits of writing :) If it’s been written down, I might as well share it, no?  Maybe then I can be motivated to write more!  I wrote this on January 22, 2019.  Longer AN at the bottom, but basically I wrote this while talking to a guy (it was a bad relationship, we were hardly friends) and stopped because I decided to cut him out of my life.

(The explanation at the end turned out longer than the story but... it was cathartic, sort of.  It was good for me).

*not his actual name and not mine either (or my sister’s)

Andy: I’m bored

Andy: can you talk?

I threw my head back against the stiff leather and blew out my cheeks, trying not to let the already overwhelming giddiness brewing in my stomach take over.

Cass: I guess

Cass: What’s up?

Andy: idk

I hated this.  I hated feeling so dependent on his responses to me.  It was unhealthy.  I turned off my phone and threw it on to the ground.  Out of the corner of my eye, I could see my sister’s amused expression, her lips pulling up at the ends.  I rolled my eyes in response, but she knew I was joking.  I turned back to face the window and focused my attention on the trees, blurring as we sped past them.

It was a beautiful day.  The sun was shining high in the sky but lightly covered by small, fluffy clouds.  The sky was so blue it was hard not to stare and bask in the feeling of wonderment.  The outside looked like a hodgepodge of random shades of green and the occasional pink thrown in, but when you concentrated, you’d see each tree was teeming with new life, celebrating the disappearance of the bitter cold.

I picked my phone up despite my better judgment and stared at the notification that shone brightly on the screen.

Andy: I’m sorry that was rude

Andy: you’re trying to keep me company and I’m blowing you off

Andy: how are you?

Messages: 3+ more

“Don’t open.  Don’t open.  Don’t ope-”

“Do it.”  I turn around to find Aria leaned over the car’s armrest, grinning at me.

Andy: sorry if you don’t want to talk anymore

Andy: I get it… thanks anyway

Andy: have a nice day

I couldn’t stand it when he got like this.  When he apologized and I got like this.  Heart a fluttering mess, stomach practically a zoo.  My head was already starting to pound.  I should get off my phone.

Cass: No, sorry

I never finished this because... On Valentine’s Day... I messed up.  I called him to tell him I liked him and then I hung up because I was so nervous... he thought it was a joke, there was a whole ordeal, he made me feel bad by saying that it was my fault for expecting a response (I was with my friend and she told me to call him back, so I did and he picked up only to hang up seconds later when I was trying to explain my feelings).  I only told him though, because a few days prior another friend of mine overheard his friends teasing him about me and she said it seemed he liked me... I started getting my hopes up but by that time, in January, I’d already started getting over him.  I wanted to completely rid my feelings of him, so I confessed.  It worked, by the way.  I told him I wanted to be friends still after, that I was getting over him but.. it’s so much more complicated and I left a lot out.  Anyway...

Yeah, I’d thought this guy was cute since seventh grade.  I was a sophomore at the time (rising junior now, wow).  We met, properly, when we both joined the school play.  He began texting me and I was over joyed.  In school he basically avoided me like the plague though + I was so giddy, every time I was around him, I was so nervous that I was never myself and our in person interactions were so awkward.  We’d text every day though, we ended up hanging out outside of school with two other friends (buffers + my wingman ;)), we called to study together.

It was toxic.  He wasn’t good to me, I was so dependent on him.  He constantly messed up and would apologize as if it made it better.

I justified being his friend and sticking around because, even though I was the one who mainly had to start conversations, he would start them back up if there was a five minute or so lull.  It seemed like he enjoyed interacting with me too.  But his responses were always so... strange.  One time, on a group chat, he said something alone the lines of “everything I say, I say with intention.  I know exactly how the person is gong to feel reading a text I send”.  At the time, I was crying over a message he’d sent to me and was just so... in shock.  Either, he’s so ignorant to believe the messages he’s sending are conveying exactly what he wants them to, or he’s a manipulative s.o.b and was making me cry on purpose.

It was a bad time but I’m sure we’ve all gone through something similar– if not, if it was just me then boooo no fair.  I just wanted to give a brief background as to why I wrote this and why I didn’t continue, I’m not about to pour my heart out in this AN (even though I’ve gone really in depth).

If you’ve read this far, thank you!  It still bothers me because a lot of what happened because of him has had its effects on my life even still– a lot good though.  Some not good.  He comes across my mind every so often, but I’m trying to get to a point where I don’t get mad every time I do so.

Also, yearbook messages were online due to covid and he sent me one which messed with my head because we stopped talking in February.

Hope you’re all staying safe and out of drama (not theater though!)!  Or, if you like hearing about drama, I hope you don’t have anything messy going on in your own personal life!

[purplesurveys]

692

How old were you when you had your first crush? The first crush I had that wasn’t a celebrity or a teacher was when I was 12. If you're a girl, how old were you when you started your period? It was a month after I turned 10. By that time I was just entering Grade 4 and when we were asked who had already gotten theirs, only a handful of hands shot up haha. I was an early bird for sure. What is your worst period story? Pretty obvious TMI warning here. Happened last December. I was visiting a photo studio to test if they were going to be suitable for my college batch’s grad shoot and unfortunately my period started in the middle of the trip. Even more unfortunately the trip was all the way in fucking BINANGONAN, which meant I couldn’t have access to napkins for the entire drive. I had to cross my legs real tight to avoid any leakage but at the time we got to the studio, my crotch area was soaked nonetheless. I had to ask for napkins from the studio staff, but thank god they were the nicest people ever and didn’t hesitate to hand me one. Does anyone else know who your first crush was besides you? Gabie knows. I think she’s the only one who knows, but I also think Pia asked me at one point too, so maybe her as well. What was your most embarrassing moment? I have at least one everyday.

What are your worst cramps like? Leg cramps that wake me up at 4 AM, without a doubt. Those always end me in tears no matter how old I am. What is the most physically painful thing you have ever experienced? Either my foot infection back in ‘09 or the toothache I had a few months back. I had no idea a TOOTH could send me crying almost every night or wake me up in the middle of the night just from being so painful. Oh and the time I ripped my ear piercing off. What are you allergic to? I’m not allergic to anything... at least I haven’t encountered anything I turned out to be allergic to. Have you ever wanted to be someone else? I’ve never seriously wanted to be a particular person, but I’ve found myself fantasizing about if I were richer. Have you ever been jealous of someone? Sure. Have you ever been jealous of a friend? Yeah. Just mostly high school stuff though, like the time Erk kept getting Gabie away from me and I got super fed up about it at one point that I stopped talking to Gab for like a month lmao. Do you feel shy around someone when you are first getting to know them? Yeah of course. Aren’t most of us? Do you feel shy around a crush? I get both shy and distant. What color hair did your first crush have? Black. Do you ever cry in public unwillingly, or are you able to hold it in? I’m able to hold it in because I hate making a scene. I just keep swallowing the lump in my throat and try to blink less. Do you throw up involuntarily when you have to, or can you swallow it down? I also can swallow it down as long as I have to. But if I really need to throw up I run to the nearest toilet. What's one near-embarrassing moment you had? Uhh idk. If I can tell something is going to be embarrassing I usually already feel pretty embarrassed about it, regardless if I’m saved from the embarrassment or not. Do you ever call yourself stupid? Yeah. Just yesterday BoJack Horseman’s “You’re a stupid piece of shit" kept replaying in my head all afternoon and evening. What was the name of your first imaginary friend? Katrina. She was my first and last. What's one weird habit you have? When I get my usual drink at Starbucks, my first sip has to be a long one and I usually savor it by closing my eyes and letting out a contented sigh haha. Only then can I start working.  Are you more of an open or a private person? I’m a bit of both, if that makes sense? I keep my shit private when they aren’t being raised, but when someone asks me about them I have no problem being an open book. Do you wish you could be more open with others? No, I already am. Do you feel ashamed? Not permanently lmao, but I feel it every now and then. Do you get embarrassed easily? Yes. Do you have regrets? Some. Have you ever fallen asleep in class? Never. I feel like – aside from being disrespectful – it’s an embarrassing thing to happen, especially if you’re caught and get scolded for it, so I make it a point not to let it happen to me. What was the hardest thing you've ever had to forgive? [Big trigger warning: Domestic violence] The day my grandpa said sorry to each of us in the family for beating up my baby cousin in a drunken stupor. After that he left the house for the week, presumably out of shame, then he came back to ask for forgiveness from each of us. I was desensitized to all of the violence I’ve seen at that point, so my 9 year old self gave him a shrug. Is there anyone you hate? No, not hate. Is there anything or anyone you're angry at, that you haven't forgiven yet? I don’t plan on forgiving my deadbeat uncle or my brother anytime soon. List five of your biggest bullies. A lot of people bullied me for my name and looks when I was younger, but they’re all irrelevant in my life now and I’ve forgotten all of them save for two – Kaira (who’s my friend now) and Sophia (who I don’t like just as much as when I was 4). Have you ever plotted revenge against someone? I’ve fantasized about revenge but never plotted anything. Have you ever done anything to get revenge against someone? Nope. ^If so, do you regret it, and did you apologize later? Have you ever had a friend crush (i.e., you really wanted to be their friend)? Yeah I remember being like this with Macy. She’s changed quite a bit these days and we don’t talk anymore, which I find sad considering what we’ve gone through in the last couple of years. What is the greatest longing of your heart? Money. The rest of my desires - happiness, contentment, the material things I want - comes after I have money lol. Who was your first love? Gabie. What was the last thing someone said that warmed your heart? Chesca said something very sweet to me and it was something I needed to hear, but explaining it would need too much background context so suffice it to say, she reassured me when I needed it most. Do you pray regularly? Nope. ^If so, to whom? Do you love Jesus? What church do you go to? I’m not religious but my mom is, and she drags the entire family to church every Sunday. That said we go to a specific parish within our area, because that’s what we’re a part of. What denomination is your church (if you go)? Catholic. What was the first year you voted in a presidential election? 2016. How old were you when the year changed to 2000? At exactly January 1? I was a year old, but I was turning 2 that year. Have you ever been afraid of the world ending? Not really, but it certainly has felt like the end of the world these days. This is the kind of shit you only ever get to read about in textbooks, so it’s feeling a little surreal. Do you enjoy public speaking? If I’m prepared for it and/or I enjoy what it is I have to talk about. What food makes you gag? Pineapple, raisins, or ice cream with nuts. Who was your first celebrity crush? Ashley Tisdale when she was Maddie in Suite Life of Zack & Cody. I also lowkey liked the mom, hahaha. What show did you want to be on when you were younger? Hi-5 when I was extremely younger; the kiddie crowds looked so lit 😩 Hahaha but when I got a bit older, I wanted to be in Legends of the Hidden Temple or be one of the people splashed with slime at the Nickelodeon Kids’ Choice Awards. Looking at my answer I could now tell I was definitely a Nickelodeon kid. What was your childhood dream? To be an astronaut, to be a wrestler, and to have a big house with a swimming pool. Did you ever fulfill your childhood dream? I have 0/3 achieved, but it’s okay. My wants have mostly changed. What is your dream now? I still want a big house with a pool for sure lmao, but I mostly just dream of having enough money all my life and never having to worry about finances or having to ask people. What is your passion? History has always been my biggest one. Are you living your dream? Not yet. Do you receive insults or compliments more? Compliments, but that’s because I don’t let myself thrive in an environment where I’d get insults more because yanno, self-care? Lol. What is unfair about your life? Bad past presidents and how it’s led our country to be in the miserable state it’s in today, whereas I have to see other countries flourish in their unbelievably competent governments and see how these countries have public parks, libraries, playgrounds, etc. I don’t know what I did in my past life to have to end up in the Philippines hahahahaha, but here we are today. What about your life would you change? I wish my dog can stay with me forever. Did you write love poems when you were younger? Nope. Who are you jealous of and why? I’m not really feeling jealousy at the moment. When someone hurts you, do you start to feel jealous of them? No? Why would that happen? Name five people you know who have everything handed to them. Idkkkkk. I don’t wanna namedrop anyone for something like this lol. Name one person you know who is spoiled rotten. Boomers? Name one person you know who seems stuck-up. I know someone but I’m not naming him on here lmao. Name a church that just wants money. All of them? LOL at least all the Catholic ones, I can’t speak for the other denominations. What is your least favorite chore? I really hate folding clothes. Have you ever had an account of yours hacked? Yeah but like by a virus or something, not a person. Have you ever been a victim of police misconduct? Nah. But traffic enforcers have been incredibly rude to me before. Do you keep a diary? This one. What color is the diary you are currently using? It doesn’t really come with a color... Do you actually write "Dear Diary"? Only in the diaries I kept as a kid, because it’s what I saw in cartoons. When was the last time you wrote and sent someone a letter? December. I included a handwritten letter in my Christmas gifts for Gab. Do you write in cursive or print more? Print. Have you ever self-harmed? Duh.

[cheerie]

sorry to personal post but im so fucking sick of my mom she is incapable of not being rude to me!!! i finally got a second job even tho it sucks and im not excited to work in a pizza place again but i wanna be able to afford rent and move out into the house that i am now living in w roommates and the first thing she says about it is that i should try to become manager like JDBSK??? i havent started my FIRST DAY YET and then i said i wanna try delivery driving and she just goes on and on abt how ill hate it and i shouldnt do it bc apparently i cant think for myself.

and earlier this week we had another “talk” where she asks what being trans means and why im trans and telling me im wrong and ill regret transitioning. my brother and i have constantly explained it to her but she will never understand and she doesnt even try to respect it. she clearly dislikes me but pretends she doesnt. she told me shes worried nobody will ever love me (bc im trans) and when i told her thats an incredibly mean thing to say she acts all innocent and plays dumb like bitch u know u wouldnt say that to anybody else, or even me if i was cis... and when i just ask her to please think about what she says before she says it like were in grade school, she acts like its such a burden on her to use tact. shes a rotten person and i cant stand being under the same roof as her. i fucking have a house but she wants me to wait another month to move out so ill be more financially secure “because she cares about my mental health.” she constantly talks about how it breaks her heart that im trans, as if im doing this to hurt her and as if she can just be as mean as she wants to me. she makes fun of my friends and bases all of her opinions on stereotypes (my friend w short hair must also be trans bc shes tomboyish!!) even after having a relatively civil conversation despite her degrading me and telling me shell never understand me or call me a boy, she has to remark that my hair is outdated and i should change it, because she literally cant have a conversation with me without being rude.

i never even fucking wanted to come out to her she found out and shes been using it against me ever since. she thinks im some kind of drug addict bc i inject it?? and she calls me stubborn and angry despite her being the stubborn one and me only seeming angry bc i constantly have to defend myself!! am i supposed to be pleased with her calling me a thing and disrespecting me on a weekly basis?? i feel sick being at home and im always on edge around her. she misconstrues me as a mean person bc how dare i move out. im lazy and “not marketable” bc i cant get a SECOND job. she regrets “letting me” major in painting despite it being my passion bc she doesnt think ill be able to make money with a painting degree, and shes always telling me to paint different things because “nobodys going to buy paintings of your friends.” i hate hate hate her and im so tired!!! how can every other person ive met be both nicer and more accepting of me than my own mother. my dad doesnt respect me being trans either but atleast he doesnt say disgusting things to me and purposely make me feel like shit. i feel like im so close to getting out but idk if ill ever be completely free from them. she’s pessimistic and moody and she makes everyone else miserable to be around her. she wants me to go to therapy, which i am totally in agreement of once i get health insurance again, but shes only telling me to go in the hopes that ill be “cured” of being trans.

i cant stand her as a person shes the reason for all of my insecurity and trauma and she has the audacity to act like shes never done anything wrong her behavior disgusts me and i never want to be anything like her!!!!!! thats all.