#which isnt that bad and its on stuff that o learned last year

[taylorswiftshipsbyler]

I've been off school the past 2 days because I was sick, but I have to go back tomorrow and I have 3 big tests😭😭

[wollfling]

Pink house new is outrageously expensive and then you find pieces secondhand from 1995 that look practically new despite obviously being worn for like $20

[macklives]

session 92 end (bye 413...)

this session was so long but so fucking hectic what the fuck

im going to try and slim it down to its bare essentials rather than go on a full rant because im pretty sure i want to make a post later on about vriska’s characterisation (not anything about me liking her/disliking her, just an analyse on her life really, so it wont be too bias because thats not the point of an analysis. i also want to do one on aradia, been meaning to for a while... hmm... damn i havent done much analogies lately, and i THINK the last long post on a character i made was about davesprite??? so its been a fucking while. that being said, ill leave a lot of details out for this end of session notes so i dont just repeat myself later on. rather will keep to plot points here and then make character points in another)

alright

first we had a page or two where aradia confided in nepeta about her being dead which means nepeta is the only one to know this revelation. im pretty sure aradia confided because there was no other way around it, since nepeta was her server player, so it was inevitable. either way, aradia still put her trust in nep, which means, if you think about it, nobody else knows and nobody else ever will. and considering aradia asked nep to keep it a secret, it probably wont get explored by others until MAYBE later on, whenever its plot relevant, so everyone will be in the dark about it for a while which ill have to remember for future dialogue and scenes with aradia in them

then we met vriska

which, yes, is a meme. i may not have been on a lot of fandom platforms, but you cant escape some of the stuff that goes around the internet. even if you dont know undertale, im pretty sure you know of sans. or komaeda if you have/havent seen danganronpa. its just.. the memes, ya know? ive heard from many sources of the “vriska did nothing wrong” quote (even through mbmbam which??? WHAT) but since i didnt even know what it meant, i never explored it so then i never knew it was a homestuck thing. imagine my surprise...... i think even at the time, i wouldnt have known what homestuck was either honestly so it wouldnt even matter. i only recently learned about the fandom.... uhh, maybe half a year ago??? yeah, august, so my knowledge was slim but vriska is a thing ive heard before, which still shocks me

goddammit

anyways back to her

so her intro was something, we pretty much found out she likes DnD (a FANATIC in fact) and feeds her lusus the flesh of living trolls. which is fucked up. but i wont get too much into detail about that until i make a post about her life on alternia and the consequences of such. or maybe just alternia in general...?? or *both* heheheh but i feel i need more information before i go off on a tangent about that

then we met??? white text dude?? who is a major asshole but an asshole with insults that hURted, to think i felt bad for VRISKA when that happened. woah.

i said before, but... karkat, he cant really hit deep because his insults are just HIM and his way to express himself. like some people find it natural to just go “FUCK YOU” to show emphasis on a point, and thats just karkats way. he may do it so aggressively that it takes you a second to realize what he said, but usually i dont take anything to heart whenever he spurts out some insults. ive progressed to the point where whatever he says, is just “karkat” and not him trying to be actively mean. rather, its now funny whenever he does say anything SOMEWHAT creative, dude has an imagination that goes on for miles

but vriska?? she IS trying to be a bully, you can tell. but i feel theres something much more to that. like shes trying to prove herself and her “blueblooded” demeanours or whatever the hierarchy is. she doesnt want to show emotions so she makes herself a barrier by being mean is what i can gather from her conversation with kanaya. im pretty sure youre not supposed to understand her until its pointed out and rather see her as an “antagonist” at first, but yeah, her insults are more pitiful than anything and i also cant take her too seriously. i may not like her as a person but her character is interesting because you cant always have the goodie two shoes as the protags. it doesnt diversify the characterisation so i like vriska as someone who makes the plot work and it becomes more interesting since you have someone that makes it harder for the main crew to progress. a happy-go-lucky adventure with no trouble and no turnabouts would be boring in a way. so having a character like vriska, or like this new white text guy, it makes you stop for a second and realize oh shit okay, here’s where shit CAN go wrong and WHY. and i do especially like it when these bastards of characters somehow have more depth than being the “bastard characters”. kinda humanizes them in a way. doesnt mean you have to LIKE them continuously, but theyre humans (trolls whatever) in the end and every person has their own story whether its for better or for worse

for example, i like her being placed into the story, along with white text, by how its all leading to this “accident” and is slowly showing us hints on what happened, but in the end, it wont be until later that we know the full story. even if it was in the past, it apparently is very vital to the plot and shapes how the characters act in the future, so important aspects like that are to look out for. and usually they only occur when theres been some trouble within friend dynamics. so without these bastard of characters, plot wouldnt grow AS strong and i often keep that in mind when i explore a story.

anyways, I HAD A POINT TO THIS: so vriska and karkat are characters who are yes, mean, but it seems to be their personality, and the way they either show emotions and convey feelings (karkat) or make a barrier so they DONT show emotions to produce vulnerability (vriska), white text guy seems to mostly be out to be an asshole. he told vriska she was useless to sum it up but im not too sure if this is one of those “first dialogue” to mould out a bias opinion before we even get to the character themselves, but judging by how vriska and karkat played out, he surely means something bad and i dont know how to explain it. but i cannot base anything off from one piece of dialogue. i dont even know what else to call him other than white text guy so...... ill just leave that out for now, until we finally get his introduction

though, i do wish to mention, and will expand on, im not wrong when i say karkat and vriska are similar but in different context. sorry if youre favourite is karkat and you dont like vriska, or vice versa, but uhhhh their introductions are so similar its uncanny and the way they’re portrayed is the same except one is more on crack about the meddling, while the other is angry about the meddling. similar to how it was with karkat, we were introduced to vriska talking with someone we knew (tavros) whom she obviously didnt like, so obviously, from her point of view, she wanted to be menacing. like how karkat was menacing to jade because she wouldnt listen to his point... he got angry, so he lashed out. but us, the readers, didnt know that. we thought “oh god its this asshole” until we made it further in the story and started to warm up to karkat. it may not be the same with vriska, she may be a bully regardless, but you cannot tell me we moulded a bias towards her character as we did when we first read karkat. theyre both truly mean to other people, maybe both for different reasons, but i do want to point out the similarities and not leave that out. im pretty sure andrew basically gave us a conversation that formed our opinion of a character right off the bat rather than go into depth of WHY they did it, and how they are naturally without the conditions of the game. which, you can also see with vriska when she conversed with kanaya. andrew started off with a character who only appears to speak once, and makes you judge them from first appearance alone, without any explanation as to why they said what they said and how they are with other characters, let says. so you assume they were simply a rude character. now look how karkat turned out. so im guessing in homestuck, the first impression should never be the opinion you stick with until MAYBE 5 more conversations with that character (each one different)

OKAY done with the vriska introduction, now to slutquius

yes, hes kinda weird, i have stated that many times. i have no idea what to say about him other than he likes porn, he likes centaur dick which just so happens to be his lusus as well and if that isnt a red flag idk what is

he also likes his lusus milk, right from the udders of his guardian

fun times, fun times

my opinion of equius kinda.. differs. which i should really put in place the “dont judge by first impression” rule, because at first i thought he was rude with, then i thought he was hhh okay, because i understood why he was being so protective over nepeta and her team placement, since the people she was going to play with WERE dangerous. but if you think about it, both sides will probably put you in danger. it just depends on which ones you confide in more to protect your back rather than those which would cause trouble on purpose, in my HONEST opinion. so equius was a little overdramatic on that part, but i got what he meant. he was on the blue team and he didnt want to leave nepeta alone without him on the red. but then this session happened. and he went back to being weird again because of the whole porn thing, especially being so open about it like dude chill youre 13. but the thing is, then i felt bad for him because hes basically touch starved. to say that he could break anything he touches, i doubt people would go up to him for hugs. in fear they would be crushed to death by a simple hug. so im guessing hes rather lonely and doesnt really know how to interact because of this. so i felt sad that he had to live a life where he needs to be careful of everything he touches so it doesnt break randomly. see? poor dude. but then things got weird. and im pretty sure hes a masochist. so my opinion on equius is a fucking cosine graph

which brings us to the final point:

gamzee and equius’ conversation

i dont even know.....like.........gamzee was unaware that equius was using him for his own power play roleplay, right? gamzee knew it was a roleplay but it had had some.. idk.... obvious sexual implications? and i bet gamzee didnt really know that? he thought they were only venting out through a simple roleplay and trying to get closer because he originally thought equius hated him, considering equius flat out said “i hate you” and gamzee went “you tell me everyday and im okay with that” so.. gamzee probably wanted only to get closer to equius so he helped out his little problem which.. thats so sweet but i feel bad he was coerced into something he didnt get, especially since he was innocent enough to go along without knowing equius’ true gain

anyways, equius was getting off with the hierarchy thing. considering he’s “lower” than gamzee, and gamzee is surprisingly ...high on the spectrum??? so equius wanted gamzee to boss him around, because it felt only natural to him since he’s the “inferior one” and gamzee is The Big Man. like i get that, but it was written in a way that was so uncomfortable, that i wish i didnt. equius is just a weird character... hes not BAD per say, but hes... hes something alright

but im really liking gamzee. the two things which struck me in that one conversation, was the “i dont get why we should dictate people by the colour of their blood, i just see people as people” piece of dialogue and “i cant go around pleasing just everything so its alright if you hate me”

thats... so good, idk. i really liked that. i also really liked when kanaya said “youre dangerous but dangerous people are needed and are important because it shapes you” like <33 my fucking heart

god homestuck may be a tad on the weird side with some of its characters but it surely knows how to create great lines of dialogue

and that concludes the long 4 hour session i did, hope you all enjoyed it

with that, i rest

[accioromione]

How Ron and Hermione would be during COVID-19 if their kids had to come back from Hogwarts

So because it is 2020 and the epilogue happens in 2017...That would mean that Rose is in her third year and Hugo was 2 years younger so he’d be in his first year., (poor guy). 

Ron would be forced to be home because Wheezes would probably be forced to shut down and Hermione would have to work from home. And both would have to deal with Rose and Hugo trying to study from home.

Here’s a written piece of what would probably happen 

xx

“Dad do you know anything about arthimancy?” Rose asked  

“Rose, the fact that you even chose arthimancy came from your mums brain not mine.” Ron responded 

“Ugh...mums busy though and I don’t want to bother her!” 

“Okay okay let me take a look” Ron said, getting the piece of paper from her hand “yeah....Okay....so.....Yeah I have no idea.” He said handing it back 

“But you were an auror!” Rose responded, desperate.

“Yeah, you don't need arthimancy for that, defence against the dark arts help maybe...Runes...Arthimancy...That’s your mum.”

“ugh okay fine I’ll ask her after dinner if I dont figure it out myself...It’s hard to teach yourself I thought I was smarter than this.” Rose sighed in frustration. 

“Rosie you’re really smart, not having a class with a professor teaching you these things would be challenging for the smartest people.” Ron responded reassuringly 

Rose smiled, “Thanks dad this whole situation’s mad” 

“I know sweetheart, trust me no one hates this more than me....I don't know why your mum doesn’t just invent a cure...Don’t tell her I said that because knowing your mum she’d try to make one just because I said that” 

Rose laughed, “I won’t, okay thanks dad I’ll try again....” Rose said going back to his room.

Ron sighed, this situation was not ideal. Especially it being Hugo’s first year...He loved his kids but having a home with just Hermione and him after 13 years was exciting. 

And although they were financially stable...Ron was responsible for a successful business... which many employees depended on  ... He also wanted Rose and Hugo to have a proper Hogwarts experience...He had no idea that this would come into the muggle and the wizarding world...And poor Hermione...They were giving her twice the amount of work and in addition to that with the kids at home...It was all a lot...He tried to help in anyway he could, like right now, he was making dinner. Usually Hermione did cook, and she had become quite a good cook at that. However, upon marriage he’d learn how to make a few staple dishes from him mum.... and could master about 4 of them..which came in handy most of the time” 

Upon the smell of the cooking the Hugo came downstairs 

“Mmm are you making roasted potatoes dad?” Hugo asked, taking a whiff

“yep, along with the roast chicken and sprouts.” Ron said “It’s nearly done..can you go ask your sister to come downstairs”  

“Rose!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Hugo yelled “Come downstairs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Dinner!!!!” 

“Brilliant,” Ron said sarcastically “Definitely couldn't have done that myself Hugh” Rose went downstairs looking defeated.

“Arthimancy?” Ron asked

“I got it actually...It’s ancient runes now...This is too much....” Rose said, grabbing plates, helping to set the table. 

“You can do it...the both of you..How’s school with you Hugh?” Ron asked 

“Not too bad yet... I think they’re pitying us cause we’re first years and we had to be sent home first year and all of that....Which they should because this sucks” Hugo said, taking a seat at the table. 

“Yeah- well there’s still six more years for you..so hopefully everyones healthy and well and you can enjoy those.” Ron said....

“I’m going to go get your mum” Ron said before leaving the kitchen..upon leaving the kitchen he went upstairs to go to Hermione’s office...He knocked the door and opened it..to see a Hermione rapidly writing on a piece of parchment in focus 

“Love?” he asked gently 

Hermione looked up and stopped writing 

“Is everything okay??” She asked, her hair was in a messy bun and she looked exhausted 

“Yeah no - everything’s fine...it’s just 8:30 you haven't eaten all day...I made dinner ..” Ron said 

“Oh is it 8:30 already!? Blimey...Oh Ron I’m horrible I’m sorry that’s like the third night you’ve made dinner” 

“It’s fine Hermione I have more spare time....Everything alright? You look stressed.” 

“I dont deserve you,” Hermione said putting down her parchment and getting off her seat to hug Ron, “and everything’s fine, it’s just having to be in contact with the ministry and the muggle politicians as well over this whole ordeal is a lot.” 

“Nonsense, of course you do, and yeah I know-” Ron said squeezing her “come eat...get some more energy” 

Hermione kissed him and they went downstairs.

Hugo was already shoving food in his mouth and Hermione smiled “just like your father Hugh- oh Ron this looks delicious!” 

“Mum do you remember anything about ancient runes?” Rose asked as Ron and Hermione took their seats 

“Ummm I think a bit- why?” Hermione asked 

“It’s just they’re making us do readings and I did better having the explanations and then doing the readings so I found it hard to translate some things do you think you could help for like 5 minutes after dinner?” Rose asked 

“Yeah of course sweetie why didn't you just ask?” Hermione responded. 

“I didn’t want to bother you- with all your ministry stuff” Rose said 

“Oh Rose I’m sorry- I know this isnt easy for the both of you...but if I can help of course I will!” Hermione added 

“Thanks mum I love you- ugh, I just feel like I’m going to fail everything!” Rose said before forking a potato 

“Funny, your mum said that before her OWLs and what you get again?” Ron added looking at Hermione “Ten O’s and one E?” 

Rose looked worried, “An E in what!?!” 

Ron laughed...

“Yep just like your mother...Defence against the Dark arts...she got the same as me..” Ron teased 

Hermione rolled her eyes and Hugo laughed...

After dinner was finished Hermione helped Rose with Ancient Runes and came downstairs to see Ron doing the dishes...

“Oh Ron stop I’ll do them you’ve done so much” Hermione said swatting his hands away 

“It’s fine really” Ron said 

“No stop..go sit” 

“Hermione it’s” 

“Stop..Sit” 

Ron obliged, he knew better than to argue with Hermione 

“Rose figured out Runes?” Ron asked watching Hermione 

“Oh yes, she only needed like 30 seconds from me and then she got it...barely helped her” 

“Yeah she’s brilliant...figured she was being harsh on herself ...like someone I know” Ron added with a smirk. 

“Ho ho” Hermione said, putting away the last of the dishes...

“Oh I really hope they can go back soon...but based on my meetings it will be a while...May go into next year..we’re in the works in opening up things in stages..business’ are obviously the priority because so many people depend on them...”  Hermione sighed lying on the couch next to Ron 

“Yeah I’m aware-” Ron said, being a business owner himself...

“Looking at reopening shops with proper equipment so I think you'll be back quite soon....schools however it’s tougher...poor Hugh..in his first year. But you know... health first” Hermione said as Ron wrapped her in his arms 

“yeah well I mean we also missed one year of Hogwarts...guess it goes in generations...We lit the candle with a war...now a pandemic...maybe our grandkids will experience an alien invasion or something” Ron joked, trying to make light in a bad situation 

“I certainly hope not” Hermione cheeked back “But you are right..we didn’t really have a normal Hogwarts experience either did we? And we turned out okay” 

“I mean.....I don't know if okay is the world....you are slightly mad..but yeah exactly” Ron joked and Hermione hit his arm 

“Abusive woman” Ron joked 

“I’ll let that slide because you cooked dinner-all  jokes aside, you have been lovely Ron, I know you’re busy too with all the business meetings but you’ve been doing all this house stuff- I love you” Hermione said before kissing him, and Ron kissed her back and held the back of her head pushing her closer to him. Even after all these years he had never lost attraction for her and only felt himself falling more and more in love with her...her and the kids meant the world to him and he felt grateful everyday..even in the midst of a pandemic..having this home ...with Hermione ...and his kids...made him realize just how far he’d come in his life. 

“Mum have you seen my- oh God my eyes...” Hugo said as he was running downstairs 

Ron and Hermione pulled apart, Hermione pink in the face

“God....can’t unsee....” Hugo said, looking disgusted. 

“Seen what?” Hermione asked, still pink 

“That black Jumper of mine-” Hugo asked and then added “god ...gross...I can't wait to go back to Hogwarts” he mumbled 

“I put it in the wash” Hermione responded 

“But it was clean!” 

“Then don’t put it on the floor if it’s clean” Hermione responded, “if it’s on the floor it goes in the wash” 

“ugh....can you give it to me when its done mum” Hugo added 

“Why do you want it so bad anyways? Have somewhere to go?” Ron joked 

“I was going to play quidditch outside...I usually wear...” 

“Okay so you’ll get it when it’s clean...besides its too late for quidditch...” Hermione added and Hugo looked at his dad for approval...

“Let the boy play quidditch...” Ron reasoned with Hermione and she gave him a deathly stare 

“You’re playing quidditch by yourself in the dark?” Hermione asked...

“Yeah I’m making the bewitching the balls and saving them myself...It’s rubbish but better than nothing” Hugo said ...Ron was reminded of when he did the exact same thing while he was trying out for the quidditch team during fifth year 

“They only allowed you to use magic outside of Hogwarts  for school work in the circumstance Hugo..not to play quidditch” Hermione reminded him 

“How is that fair? It’s not my fault I’m not at Hogwarts....Dad....” Hugo said looking for his father to be the voice of reason 

“Hermione let the boy have fun” and Hermione gave him a death stare. 

“Fine go off! But do not go far....if I even find out you’re....” and Hugo ran off going up to his room to get his broom and ran outside

“You never let me discipline” Hermione scolded, 

“Let him be a kid Hermione....we never got that...besides would you rather him outside or walking in on us every two minutes?” Ron asked 

“Walking in?” Hermione asked 

“Mhmmm come....” Ron said dragging her upstairs

“Rose....” 

“Is in her room studying...and now Hugo’s outside...we have time...silencing charm for like fifteen minutes should be enough” 

“Ron I...” 

“Come on..relieve some stress...” Ron said and kissed her on the neck..he knew once he did that it was over...And unsurprisingly, Hermione, now mush in his hands, was obliging and following him...making the best of an unfortunate situation 

[reveliohq]

welcome back to hogwarts, PANDORA MIDORI ! enclosed here you will find all the necessary equipment for the upcoming school year. we await your owl by no later than twenty-four hours from now, or else you will lose your spot ! minatozaki sana is now taken.

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐈𝐍𝐅𝐎

(   *  💀  /  minatozaki sana, cisfemale, she/her  )  —  is that pandora midori i just saw rushing down the corridor? i hear they’re a twenty year old gryffindor, returning for their year in sixth school year, but their friends would tell you that they are curious & open-minded as well as impulsive & immature. if you want to know more about them, i guess i could tell you that they’re muggleborn, and from what i hear, they’re currently allying with the order. when our divination professor looks into their crystal ball, they see: neon colored bandaids wrapped around her fingers, vibrant mismatched socks, poorly stifled giggles from the back of the classroom. but who knows?  —  ( angela, she/her, 24, cst )    

𝐅𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐌 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

born in america, but her family moved to the country side of ireland when she was a toddler. as far as she’s consider, she’s irish. hasnt been to america since she was about 4. peace, love, flower power, all that stuff. so they wanted to live off the land away from most of technology. which was fine. all the kids were going to be home schooled. well that was until pandora showed signs of magic. and they have no idea how to handle it since. at first, they were going to see if she could control it on her own. they didn’t want her to be in traditional schooling if they could help it… but with as explosive as her magic can be, they learned quickly to enroll her into school for magic as early as possible. other family members outside of her parents and siblings just think she went to a gifted school. just dont tell anyone different. she’s in some magnet program, nothing fishy here. magic? what magic? magic didn’t come naturally easy for pandora. it was always rather explosive and hard to control. when she was paired up with her wand, it didn’t get much easier. between the dogwood and the phoenix feather, the thing has a mind of its own. it wasn’t until she realized that it liked knowing and planning out the spells and knowing whats going on that it started to cooperate with pandora. named it eris from the goddess of discord. catch her arguing it and putting it in the time out jar when its being bad. it will just randomly fire if it feels like she isnt giving it enough attention or intentionally fuzz up spells for no reasons. its a very mischievous wand. but, it really like being creative with its magic. so when pandora took an interest with how spells are made, it started to be a little bit more willing to cast spells. over time, they two have gotten a really strong bond, even if it likes to misbehave every so often. if push came to shove and pandora was in danger, it would fire correctly to protect her. there was a brief moment when pandora was considered for hufflepuff by the hat. it didn’t last too long. fast foreword to hogwarts, and she is definitely just into the casting based classes. besides potions, which shes just barely scrapping by with, she does whatever is needed to have an O, while putting all of her time into learning about casting. now she is starting to put together her own spells. most of them are silly prank related charms, since she doesn’t want to try anything too dangerous until she gets comfortable with the craft. was excited for all things magic when she get into the dublin school for magic. continued into her teens. tried out for quidditch on a whim and seems to be a pretty fine keeper. please people bring in her teammates shes lonely. currently in the order to lend her dueling talents and also feels she needs to stand up for herself as a muggleborn. despite her blood, she is just as capable, if not more talented, than a lot of other half-blood and pureblood wixen out there and she’s willing to prove it.

[hey-hamlet]

BNHA AU Ideas : The villain’s little hero

Also on AO3! 

TL;DR:  All Might, Japan's number 1 villain has a successor. The problem? His successor is a hero hopeful. All Might will stop at nothing to make sure his kid gets to live his dream.

au where all might is a villain raising izuku to be a hero!

quirkless izuku, his backstory is mostly the same

all might decided that hero work had too much red tape. if he was going to take down afo, he needed the freedom to do whatever he had to and he wasnt getting that working within the law

so hes a,,, viilllaaaiinnn?? like. stain. but less murdery, would also save civilians if they were in danger

he has 0 qualms about crippling fake heroes but hes not a fan of murder

nighteye is still his sidekick, he doesnt use his quirk on allmight bc all might h a t e s it

hes kinda on board with "the future is only set in stone because you've seen it now" so he wants the freedom to break fate. but its very useful to get info, so nighteye just uses it on other people

hero to the people villain to literally everyone else

allmights villain costume is reallll similar to his hero costume. just less eye bleeding

he has longer grey hair too.

all mights bronze age costume is basically his villain costume thanks for listening

david shield is still in this story

david agrees w all might and like,,, sneaks him stuff on the downlow

all might told him ab. his quirk because who on earth is gonna believe that one america man about japans worst supervillain?

also melissa is a Soft Young Woman and she is all mights favourite person on this fucking planet until he meets izuku

all might went to ua, only defected after completing his hero training because he wanted to be trained by the people he was going to screw over

izuku has always kinda been a big fan of all might. not openly because hes legally a villain and very much paints himself as one, but his quirk is one of the most amazing things izuku has ever seen

when he looks closer, all might has never let a civilian get hurt once hes been on scene. hes taken hits to protect housing, hes pulled heroes from the line of fire

izuku watches his sports festivals and wonders why? why did all might, the man who happily told the world he'd stop at nothing to keep them safe, suddenly flip sides like that for no reason?

izuku doesnt buy it

izuku's big yellow backpack is a big red one in this universe, hes had it so long its gone pink but he still loves it

the sludge villain

all might saves him and izuku is crying. allmight thinks its because hes scared but izuku just turns to him with this big weepy eye smile and gives him the most genuine thanks he thinks hes ever been given

(its honestly the shock of that that makes him deflate into small might, which has izuku scrambling to find tissues and called an ambulance before he thinks better of calling emergency services for All Might)

izuku is like "Im SO SORRY SIR ARE YOU oK"

and all might is like ",,, b  oy"

izuku softly asking

"can,, can i still be someone with out a quirk? can i still make a difference?"

all might doesnt get the chance to anser because there is a massive explosion in the distance

its bakugo!! hes dying

the sludge villain got away bc izuku and all might were chatting a little

izuku hears it and he feels this terrible realization, because its probably not bakugo? but its definitely bakugo because izuku's life is falling to pieces

he sprints towards him and katsuki will n e v e r admit it but he feels hope in that moment because some one is trying to help. even if its just izuku, he wasnt totally left for dead

all might sees this tiny, nervous, quirkless kid run straight up to a villain that almost killed him seconds before to save someone what looks like they'd rather die

and he thinks

"no one deserves one for all more than him"

and allmight, the most wanted villain in japan, maybe the world, jumps in

the heroes look at him and they are scared. if they couldnt take the sludge villain, what is all might going to do to them? but the scariest man in japan, the person parents tell their kids about to stop them from going out at night, blows the sludge villain to tiny pieces and carefully, gently, places the two boys by the heroes

before he vanishes before they can call for backup or even ask why

izuku gets yelled at by the heroes because the heroes are scared and angry they couldnt stop either of the villains and izuku is so overwhelmed that hes crying and he can hardly breathe

bakugo doesnt even yell at him because hes so dazed about everything that happened and he cant make himself yell at this sobbing kid that used to be his friend

(bakugo is holding izukus hand like hes going to crush it but its the only thing keeping izuku present)

izuku is walking home and hes still hicuping and crying because he almost died and the heroes hate him and he feels a hand on his shoulder, and a soft :"its ok now my boy"

he knows its all might but he cant help but hide his face in his shirt and sob

all might gets down so he can look izuku in the eye

"you asked me if you could be someone with out a quirk and i didnt get the chance to answer. my answer? you already are someone. you are someone that inspired me, a villain, to save the day. you are going to be amazing"

and looks him dead in the eye "you'll do amazing things, even with out a quirk. but, you of all people deserve one, and no matter what you chose to do with it, it can be yours. hero, villain or someone in between"

izuku looks at this villain

this painfully thin villain, who just saved his life and who has unimaginable strength

and he throws his arms around his waist and sobs

inko isnt a great mum in this au and she likes to basically pretend izuku doesnt exist

izuku trains a lot and has to make his own food bc his mum just ignores him

he sneaks out at night to clear trash and sneaks back in before dawn to clean the sand from his hair

he smells like saltwater and rust, and he hasnt slept more than 4 hours a night in weeks and katsuki is worried

all might sees him crumbling with a smile stuck on his face and he wants to stop him from self-destructing, but the kid will never learn his lesson until he feels his body give up under what hes doing to it. if all might steps in he'll do it again and again until no one stops him and hes never learnt his limit.

so he waits and he watches while he pretends he cant see the bags under his eyes and pretends that everytime izuku sways on his feet he doesnt feel a jolt of deep panic

did he do this? if he the reason izuku looks like hes falling apart before his eyes?

the kid passes the fuck out and all might tells him off in a soft dad way and izuku cries bc why does this villain care more than his mum does

and all might catches the end of that little mumble, and feels terrible so he pretends he didnt hear and takes him for lunch

they go to a cafe and all might buys izuku the cutest slice of cake and a big ass bowl of katsudon and some fancy fucking tea and covers the kids eyes every time he tries to look at the prices

izuku looks at all might and asks

"are you buying me katsudon with crime money"

and all might looks sheepish and izuku giggles like an idiot and says "dont tell me ill feel bad!!!"

all might grins bc this kid is honestly the only reason he hasnt stabbed a pro hero in a few months bc hes so fucking sweet

he has to carry izuku half the way home bc the kid could barely lift his chopsticks and almost fell asleep in the booth after he finished eating

and allmight, skinny and kinda scary is giving his 15 year old a piggy back and someone says "you're such a good dad!" and he almost coughs up his last lung

izuku mumbles sleepily and hes has the biggest warm and fuzzy feeling and hes going to yell bc hes All Might the No. 1 Villain and this fucking kid is drooling on his sweater but he would die for him

some random stranger on the street commenting on how it was rly fortunate that izuku inherited his adorable smile from his father

all might, abt to burst into tears: whack

allmight is easily flustered even when hes killed a man

he comes home and inko isnt there so he has to like, wake up izuku to get him to open the door and he feels bad bc izuku is a Sleepy Man

izuku mumbles that he cant ever tell if shes at home or not because nothing changes and all might feels a wave of "wait my son isnt being parented enough"

so he makes izuku a cup of tea and tucks him into bed after he has a shower because izuku is His Son Now Inko

hes like

sitting in the living room reading the paper and he hears inko's car and hes like ",,, fuck it im walking out the front door im no coward"

she doesnt even notice and hes going to scream because does she have a brain

inko, spaced out, tired and terrible: oh is the tall man here for izuku :))) thats great :)))

all might is screaming bc"" do you get let weird men into see your tiny son>???? what the fuck???

hes so small inko??? and you?? let random men in?????

all might would yeet her into the sun if he could but his boy needs an actual family member to make going to ua easier

inko is kinda mentally ill. she is depressed and often forgets she has izuku. like shes not always being terrible she just sometimes forget to do basic things

one time she locked izuku out of the house for 10 hours and he had to sleep next to the front door

one month she didnt buy any food so by the end of it he was starving and out of his own money and there was n o t h i n g in the house, but inko would go out to eat every night and lunch and not take her son

allmight is upset bc izuku didnt tell him but izuku is embarrassed. embarrassed that he was forgotten by his own mum, that he couldnt do anything to help her or himself and honestly mad he was so hungry all might noticed bc he didnt want to bug him

it was getting to the point that katsuki actually slipped some change into his bag with a candy bar

[alukaforyou]

and ALSO sry to post bs on main im mostly just talking to myself in my personal tag half the time so yolo, no need to respond to this or reassure me or whatever but these days i licherally question how much of my - sry to sound like a broken record - bs is dépression or just my shité mentality, like i rly was not designed to last, huh? physically or mentally? lol. like who gets motion sickness on swings lmao anyways. i think i give up too easily. theres a bunch of reasons y but i dont feel like saying. its a different thing to kind of kno something, and to admit / speak it (confront it). i could psychoanalyze myself all day and tell u exactly why some things are the way they are but its too unpleasant to neatly state stuff like that u kno?? like... *i kno* but im not gonna say i kno. anywho, i digress. so i give up easily and kind of have a defeatist mentality too, its so exhausting lool. actually its weird cuz duality of man, i'll be rly determined / stubborn abt doing some stuff and not care abt fear of failure with certain things but when it comes to My Life / My Future i just think i cant rly do anything? i mean that literally like i got no skillz *laugh crying emoji* not particularly good at anything, and art - the only thing im maybe arguably ok at - i dont wanna do as a career, that is art therapy for me i dont feel like commercializing it. not interested in working in my major, maybe things wouldve been different if i went to culinary or cosmetology school?? that sounds fun. or if i majored in bio cuz i was so good at that, or even if i majored in japanese language or literature or idk. but no regrets tho cuz i learned a lot abt drawing in art school which i can use for myself. and hmm i like staying home and not rly going out of my way to meet new ppl so connections what? i h8 hearing how most opportunities come through the ppl u kno cuz its true and ik like 10 ppl tops so hm very sexi of me :^) i just feel like im p much f*cked and it rly doesnt help that i have no functional dreams, goals, or aspirations nor the confidence and drive to work towards anything so ah ok cool. u kno suga's songs "the last" and "so far away" ? that p much sums up my feels minus the part abt having to deal w fame obviously LOL. its so easy being a student (for me at least) but being a good student isnt really worth a whole lot in the """""real world""""" and the current education system doesnt even rly prepare u for reality or w.e like Deep Sigh also the political climate rly lookin like shité out there like hmmmmm do i even wanna try so hard to be here anymore tho??? also going back to the self confidence thing, ya idk her LOOOOL like it doesnt very much bother me tho? i really, honest to god have no idea what my redeeming qualities even are. being nice? and my mindset re - tolerance and compassion for others, etc, ya im rly proud of that actually but besides that i mean like what can i Do tho like hm im not particularly good at anything also im hideous like uglee but thats ok too like none of this Bothers me, thats just literally how i Am so ok fine, but i feel like it makes it hard for me to exist in the world i happen to be in??? and i realize im speaking with a huge bias here cuz my brain is totally out of whack im p sure if some1 saw me / read this they would lit be like um u literally do not have it hard girl, which is fair ur kinda right actually from an objective pov, probably? its amazing how um. hard? of a time my brain is having given my relatively ok circumstances but thats just how it is ig. and if i may quote shakespeare - o full of scorpions is my mind. and its weird cuz duality of man - i actually have a lot of good times w friends and whatever i have a lot of fun, im not even very Sad or in Agony its all very a mild? sensation? but that might be because my plan b is to simply *** so nothing rly fazes me anymore lool.

its usually a v confusing emotion, im either feeling happy, or if not that, very ???? im literally that duwang quote get a feeling so complicated its just "ajdjsjsja" idk its not overly repulsive and upsetting im like :s LOL u kno wat at this point idek what im even saying anymore but its good that im writing whatever cuz im gonna need to look back on this later and organize my thoughts for presentation cuz remember i have a s.o now???? i wanna let them kno so we r on the same page, and i dont feel like im tricking them, i thought it over more and there are like 4? major cards i wanna lay out on the table early on and they are 1. im not that close w my family emotionally so do not seek their approval or expect to deal with them much. 2. personal ideology / political views like im bi lmao and pro lgbt if that wasnt obvious also i dont rly wanna be around racists / terfs etc and if ur right wing or not on that respect women juice uhhh bye.. 3. my weak ass mentality how i might Maybe *** in the future like no promise but errrr theres one more but its a little more negotiable and also too early to discuss so i wont mention it but i already got the first two outta the way so ya. theres the most troublesome of all, #3. the last thing i wanna do is traumatize someone that loves me (and i love back) with that kinda thing, its too late for my dear friends whom i love, sorry i didnt kno i was gonna be like this LOL yall already got attached but its a little different with my s.o cuz i feel like its not too late to uh.... stop getting as attached LMAO like dam i've known my girls for almost 10 years whereas i've only known my s.o for like a month.

and this is totally not gonna come across right but if my s.o very understandably desides to dump me id be SO RELIEVED LIKE WOOOO ok cool cuz like essentially what i'd be saying is you are getting attached to someone who's future is not as stable as other people, including u. *huge exhale* from the bottom of my heart, my bad lol. and then i probs wont ever get involved w. a s.o again, sorry to reference snk in 2020 but remember how e*win smith is single cuz he doesnt kno when he will ***? big mood. i have never acted out on my interests before but i was like ok for once lets go off the shits and do smth ooc, i uh... didnt expect for it to actually go anywhere tho so now im like ???? i shouldve thought it through more tho, like i felt low key irresponsible af and selfish and dumb for getting involved w. someone even tho i Know how I Am like...... Also i just lov being single and staying home and chilling alone lmao like i seriously...... never get loney....

ok so what was i talking abt? how the passage of time makes me nervous cuz idk how i can manage to keep up w it??? how i feel like i cant do jack shit???? that life is hard???? and maybe a bih just wants to rest? permanently?????? i think the most irritating part of all for me, like what i am most mad about at myself is that i have no dream. yikes. naruto, do u think thats sad? well yoongi said its okay, and what counts is just being happy, so i will console myself and forgive her and idk just try my best for the time being??

[insertdisc5]

homestuck epilogues stuff

thoughts about the homestuck epilogues, as in, spoilers and theories and things ive noticed by reading it over twice and talking with friend @kravicle while they were reading

this is just a list of theories me and krav came up with ok. also stuff u might not pick up in only one read? we’re just spitballing here 

MEAT AND CANDY TEREZI ARE PROBABLY ONE AND THE SAME

> just didnt see proof they weren't the same lmao, we only get john+terezi's messages from both timelines and she could have gotten messages from both meat!john and candy!john

>time is fucked on her end also so (shrugs)

>(terezi meeting meat!john) "something else is different about him. different, somehow, from how she thought he’d be when she imagined they’d next meet. under all the gore, he smells... too fresh."

>TEREZI: HMMM

TEREZI: YOU SM3LL OLD3R

TEREZI: BUT NOT 4S OLD 4S 1 THOUGHT YOUD B3

JOHN: what does that mean?

TEREZI: DONT WORRY 4BOUT 1T

>"In multiple realities, all [John] wanted for her was this. To be home safe, with all their friends. And now that she’s here, she’s lost."

> (meeting Meat!roxy) "Terezi’s head is filled with stories about a different version of Roxy—the polar opposite of the one standing in front of her."

DIRK’S PLAN PART 1 (free will)

>maybe plans to get Actual Free Will thru ultimate godhood??? also explains why he feels okay with removing free will from his friends- for him, this isnt real free will anyway?

>(dirk talking about kanaya) "What WAS she thinking? What are any of us thinking, really? Who’s doing the thinking, and who’s having the thoughts?

The more you study the question, the more it seems all concrete forms of accountability go up in smoke. Her original thoughts were never that important, and the significance of the idea that she was the one authoring them was always a bit overrated. My mission is to someday clear this all up for everyone. Remove the ambiguity, suck the mud out of the water. It’ll be a lot better that way, trust me."

>to old callie, dirk's plan "[john’s] ultimate sacrifice was made to put the missing keystone in place and avert the supreme dissipation of all that shall be considered to hold truth, relevance, and essentiality."

>although narrator callie thinks this world has some sort of actual free will. says "[john should kiss terezi etc]. it’s wrong to contradict one’s true thoughts and feelings. irrational. unbecoming of an existence governed by free will."

>his plan to give everyone/ultimate gods “free will” will end up destroying canon????

DIRK’S PLAN PART 2 (complacency of the learned, ultimate self)

>complacency of the learned, 12 people attaining ultimate knowledge (=ultimate self), and turning "either insane or evil"

> (candy ending, rose’s POV) "The thoughts in her powerful brain race. What will they name the planet? How long will it take for the ship to arrive? Once the new race has established an advanced enough civilization thousands of years from now, who will the lucky kids be? The ones who get the chance to play what will arguably be the most important session in the history of Sburb?" 

>finding more people to attain ultimate godhood???

>dirk asks terezi to come with him and rose at the end of meat, along with john's body (implied that she did accept-callie!jade points and dave thinks she points both to dirk+rose and john+terezi, callie doesnt prove him otherwise)

>dirk wants 12 ultimate gods for each aspect????

>"If your perception expands beyond the meat sack of your body, then are you really an individual anymore? Why shouldn’t we become gods? Why shouldn’t we become one God."

- (callie speaking) "[John] is simply being barred from ignoring his true thoughts. even without the aid of a juju, he is fortunate enough to be blessed with the only true form of divinity. to be released from the prison of nonsensical inhibitions which so often psychologically hobble the more primitive forms of life."

>callie is probably an ultimate god, terezi should be?? with rem8mb8r?

DIRK’S NARRATOR STUFF

>dirk probably doesnt know hes in a story/that he has an audience (us) "How can I respect a fucking pronoun when nobody can even hear me?”

>does dirk control people by using you-ness? using 2nd person to control, 3rd person to narrate?

>”JADE: and where there is an identity, there can also be an agenda.”

CANDY TIMELINE STUFF

>part of the black hole, a utopia, place removed from reality/canon in some way??? WEIRDO DREAM BUBBLE????

>cut off from canon in some way- dirk and rose cant get to ultimate godhood anymore, john cant use retcon powers

>candy!john mentions multiple times he doesnt think of him and his friends as "real"

>sky in candy!timeline described as more vibrant (VS pre-sburb being described as muted)

>candy!karkat talking to sollux and probably being foreshadowing without knowing: “KARKAT: I THOUGHT THAT YOU TWO LITERALLY DIDN’T EXIST ANYMORE! KARKAT: OR AT THE VERY LEAST WERE TRAPPED IN A DEAD UNIVERSE PERPETUALLY COLLAPSING INTO ITS OWN ASSHOLE.”

>CALLIOPE: we’re all going to be very, very happy. I trUly believe that. ^u^ 

>ROSE: Oh Kanaya, you’re right.

ROSE: We are going to be so astonishingly happy!

>ROXY: omg

ROXY: were gonna be SO freakin happy!

>Dirk in Meat: "Cherubs are fuckin’ weird, I’ll totally concede. Still not sure what makes them tick. What they idealize, what they really want. It all comes across to me as a little cloying. Perfection to them is a sweetness beyond comprehension. Sugar so potent it’s poison to us. To our bodies, to our souls. Like the place she was operating from was a realm of self-construction. A bubble of pure, phantasmal confection."

>end of meat!callie can see into candy!timeline ROXY: they stay home all day with the blinds drawn paintin some weird ass shit on the walls

TEREZI: WH4T?

ROXY: its not as bad as it sounds i promise

ROXY: some of it is like

ROXY: weird and violent??

ROXY: like lotsa nasty purple blood and um

ROXY: nudity????

TEREZI: >:?

ROXY: yeah yikes

ROXY: but MOST of it is cute stuff like... various combos of all of us being happy and gettin married and shit

>obama’s here. god i need a minute

>dirk told gamzee something??? 

“DAVE: wheres dirk

GAMZEE: tHeRe’S nO nEeD tO wOrRy AbOuT hIm. :o)

GAMZEE: YoU’rE gOnNa GeT wHaT’s BeSt FoR yOu. He ToLd Me ThAt, AnD i’M gOnNa MaKe SuRe HiS wIsH mAkEs LiKe A mOtHeRfUcKiNg MiRaClE aNd GeTs TrUe.

[...]

GAMZEE: YoU dOn’T gOt AnY nEeD tO gO aNd CoNcErN yOuRsElF wItH hIs MoRtAl FlEsH bOdY oUt HeRe In ThIs CaNdYcAnE wHiRlPoOl BeYoNd ThE iNfInItE bLaCk WiNk Of ThE wIcKeD sInGuLaRiTy, My NiNjA.

GAMZEE: a SaCk Of MeAt AnD bOnEs In OnE lIfE oR tHe NeXt Is OnLy A mEaNs To ThE fInAl ToTaLiTy ThAt WiLl DaMn AnD rAiSe Us AlL iN bRiLlIaNt ApOtHeOsIs.

GAMZEE: In ThE oNe TrUe LiFe We AlL fLoW fRoM tHe OnE tRuE pEn,

GAMZEE: aNd EvErY hEaD rOlLs DoWn ThE pAtH tO tHe OnE tRuE hAnD.”

> dirk before killing himself:  “ It is the very last moment of narratively consequential action that will happen in this whole, barren world. “

OTHER STUFF

> dirk teaching men about "combat, philosophy, life, love." (jake, dave, obama, not said explicitly but also probably gamzee????) what is UP with that

>gamzee also wanting to teach kid tavros about combat philosophy life love, “to behave the way a mentor does”

>re: john “Your complete lack of remarkability, specific motivation, drive, opinion on where to direct your own fate—these deficiencies are exactly what made you so useful, so susceptible to being endowed with the you-ness I’ve borrowed to satisfy my purposes.”

>at the end of meat, callie in jade's body in candy timeline kills lord english and gets big powers or whatever. cherub stuff

>terezi gets a text at the end of Meat, we dont know from whom (candy!(vriska)?)

>john left letters for everyone in Meat but no one’s found them yet?

>snapchats were probably before the split 

>this whole post makes both me and krav sound like we’re been talking about this for 24 hours straight (we did)

[hypmicscenarios]

Anime Attraction

3.K words

A/N: High School au. Fic with ichiro, you two slowly falling in love over the span of a 4 day convention and bonding over the fact that you’re closeted weebs. (So he would like tdd era ichiro) And again! I use neutral pronouns! hope you enjoy~

Day 1: You were very excited, happy, elated, every happy word in the book! This year, you were finally going to your first anime convention. Unfortunately, you were a bit of a closeted weeb. People knew you watched anime….just not your extreme obssession with it. Maybe extreme was too harsh for you case, but you were sure that would be the situation if they ever saw your room, filled with anime posters, merch, etc.However, those were all bought online or in stores….youve never actually been to a convention.

Online, you heard many good things about it, and that people there, for the most part, were friendly. You smiled as you got off the train, an empty backpack on your bag, besides essentials, inside an empty tote bag for you posters. You had planned for this for months. Saving up all the money you could from your allowances. Your wallet, besides money for the train and food to eat, was going to be completely emptied by the end of the day. Finally, you took your jacket off, revealing a ( favorite anime) anime shirt on your person. One of your favorites. You could never choose. You could talk about it for days. However….it was Under rated. It was also a bit old...and you were late to watch it, so the fandom dwindled down.

You were amazed as you saw many cosplays, a bit too nervous to ask for pictures, or even compliment them, but you hoped they received your compliments in spirit….something like that. It was….also really big and crowded. You got too into your head, overthinking a bunch of things, that you didn’t see the larger man in front of you, hitting his back.

“O-oh im sorry, I wasn’t paying attention,” you said, bowing quickly. You looked up at the man, gulping, quickly taken aback by how pretty he was, different colored eyes, red and green. It almost seemed like he was in cosplay, but he was just wearing a naruto shirt with black jeans on, a naruto headband around his forehead.

Ichiro blinked and smiled,”no need to apologize, I was kind of standing here in the middle of everyone anyway,”his eyes went down to your shirt and his eyes sparkled,”wait….thats a (favorite anime) isnt it! Whose your favorite character?”, he asked. You were taken aback about how eager and happy he seemed, but it definitely managed to make you relax a bit.

“My favorite character is [     ],”you said, stating your reasoning,”oh- sorry….I didn’t mean to talk that long,” Ichiro chuckled,”thats fine, I love them too! For mostly the same reasons, theyre kind of cool. This is my first convention so Im excited its going off to great start, thanks.”

Oh? It was his first time as well? “Its my first time too, I came here alone, I didn’t expect to be this big, theres so many people.” Ichiro nodded,”Im here by myself too, are you here all four days?” You nodded. “If you dont mind it, we can walk around together, ah! Sorry if thats a bit too forward….”,he trailed off. To be honest, Ichiro was a closeted weeb. So he had no one to talk to, let alone drag to a con. “Oh no, Um, its fine. I would like that...even though I know everyone here loves anime….”,you trailed off, the guy, whose name you still didn’t know, finished your thought,”because theres so many people conversing and being you feel like everyone already has their own cliques and you realize youre alone.”

Well. That. Yes that. You smiled,”Yeah, its that, and my nerves and anxiety.”

Ichiro stuck his hand out,”Yamada Ichiro, 2nd year high school student in Ikebukuro. Nice to meet you.”

“ l/n, f/n, also 2nd year in a high school located in yokohama, nice to meet you”m you said and shook his hand. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad after all.

Day 2:

The first day, the two of you had walked around, played games, went to panels together, learning much more about each other. You agreed to meetup at the same place in the morning. Of course, you were even more excited than you were yesterday. You were dressed in more casual clothing, but backpack was now decorated with buttons you found. Soon, you heard your name being called out and waved your hand,”Good Morning Yamada-san”, you said, greeting him.

Ichiro smiled and spoke,”Morning! Did you sleep well?”, he asked.  You shook your head in disagreement,”I barely got any sleep, I was excited for today.” Ichiro laughed,”so did I, so what should we do today?”,he said, taking out the convention program guide. “Hmmmm, theres a bunch of panels,”you said, going to the side of him and looking at the program,”how to successfully master naruto hand signs….”,you trailed off. They really….had a panel for everything.

Ichiro’s face lit up,” that sounds cool, want to go? Although I already know a couple…”,he said, and you laughed,”what? You going to become the next hokage Yamada-san?”, you teased a bit, but he went along with it, of course he did. You found out about this from yesterday. That he was like this. “I am gonna be next hokage, just believe it!”, he said.

“Thats naruto’s punchline you cant just steal it,” you said, watching Ichiro as he thought, then spoke again, very excitedly,”Im going to be next hokage, because I said so!”, he said, putting out a thumb. For some reason, it had you laughing a lot,”b-bbecause you said so? Ahahaha, well, you sure have a passion like naruto, I think thats all you need, its cute”, you said, realizing that you had just called the other cute.

Ichiro blushed and put his hand behind his back,”Sorry...I just cant be like this a lot in real life without getting teased for it, so its a bit refreshing,”he said and you nodded,, understanding completely.

“Well, lets go learn some jutstus even though they wont help against a gun but who cares, because its an anime convention, and we’re doing what we love,”you said confidently, more confident than you would expect from yourself.  Ichiro nodded,”Dattebayo, lets go!”, he saidm turning around and walking. You were really having too much fun. Being attracted to him went way over your head for now, simply enjoying the time the two of you spent together.

Later on in the day, the two of you found an anime photo booth, Ichiro dragging you by the arm towards it,”for memories!”, he said. The two of you got in and hit the naruto theme poses. Of course, you indulged him, he was cute when he got his way. And, you didn’t have to worry about poses. Instead, they gave you poses to do.

The first was a naruto sign for any jutsu, the second peace signs, the third you had to stick your tongues at each other, seeming annoyed, and the last one….got you. It was only a hug, but they way Ichiro hugged you quickly and tightly, pushing both of your faces together, eft you shocked, and you were sure the picture didn’t turn out well. Once you got out and looked at it, Ichiro pointed to last one,”its like you were trying so hard not to blink, but we’re cute, arent we?”,he said and you laughed:yea we really are”, you replied, more focused on the current pace of your heart...beating very rapidly. You paid for two copies so you could keep it. The rest of the day, you two kept up your shenanigans. It was tough leaving, but you were going to come back tomorrow and, hopefully, your heart would learn to behave.

Day 3:

The two of you sat down to eat lunch on the third day, already having gone through a couple activities.

“Theres Jiro, then theres Saburo, and Saburo is the oldest. We’re all pretty close but Saburo and Jiro always fight a lot, typical sibling stuff…..and a lot of the times it includes me. I keep telling them I dont have favorites but they never listen,”Ichiro sighed with a smile on his face. It wasn’t an exhausted sigh though, he was used to it, it was just how they worked.

You smiled as he rambled on about his brothers. It was very clear that he cherished the both of them dearly and would do anything for them. “That must be nice….Im an only child so I could never relate to these type of things. Thats why I got into anime really, theres was no one that I could play with at the snap of a finger if I wanted to-oh Im not sad about it or anything, I love anime, it was really there for me in trying times, plus the internet.”

Ichiro nodded and then spoke,”Well, you have me now too, and you can be as passionate as you want, no holding back. You have my number now and its already fun texting you when we’re not at the convention.”  He was right. After you guys left, you were quickly texting each other at home before you went to sleep. You sent each other memes,pictures, and talked about a bunch of different topics, that often you had smiling or laughing at your phone.

At that point….you knew had a crush. It was only two days but he was just so…..it was the little things really, not just the fact that you had anime in common. When you were walking through the convention center, going through a massive crowd, he told you to hold onto his jacket, so you wouldn’t get lost. Or how he quickly offered to help hold your stuff when you were buying merchandise. Or even him talking about how much he loves his brothers. Rather than weird, it was insanely cute to you.

It wasnt love per say…..well. Lets be real. You were a sucker when it came to love. Honestly, you dont even feel like counting how many crushes you had but none of those ever came to fruition.  You should just focus on your anime boys but the moment some other boy is even the slightest bit kind to you, like helping you carry books, your heart falls. Despite that though, you felt like this was different. More than just a couple simple acts of kindness.

“Im really enjoying our time here, we’re going to the cosplay masquerade today right? We still have some time to kill, want to go to the game hall?”, you asked,”then we can see which one of us is better at dance dance revolution.” Ichiro smiled and nodded his head,”Yeah! Youre on!”

After that, the two of you managed to spend all of your time in the hall. Ichiro was by a claw machine and you commented,”I suck at these things,”then looked inside, seeing what plushies they had. “I think im pretty decent,”Ichiro said, walking up,”sometimes I won stuff for saburo when I was little...he grew out of it though,”Ichiro said with a laugh.He wanted to try it.

“Good Luck Yamada-kun!”, you said, cheering him on. You were amazed by how focused he looked. “Do you want anything specific?”,he asked you. “Wait, me?”, you said, trying to clarify. Ichiro laughed,”I think you’re the only l/n here,”he said. That...kind of caught you off guard. But you walked up and placed your hands against the glass. “Ummmm, that cat in the middle is kind of cute.”

Ichiro nodded. The first time, he managed to pick the plushie up for about three seconds before it fell, but that was better than what you could do! The second time, he managed to grab it again, your eyes wide in anticipation as you followed the claw and plushie to the drop off slot. “Oh my god, you did it!”,you said, going to high five both of Ichiro’s hands but, instead of letting go, he held them and put them down,”Yeah I did! Guess I didn’t lose my skill after all.” “Yeah...youre amazing”, you said, trying to not comment on the fact that he was still holding both of your hands. God….your heart was a mess. There was no denying you fell for him. At most, it was very high like at this point.

Day 4:

Ichiro was excited to see you again. Well, half-excited and half-sad. He really liked hanging out with you. More often than not, he found himself thinking about how you look best when theres a smile on your face. So, he always did dumb things to make you smile, no matter how stupid it may have looked. Maybe it was because you didn’t think his obsession was weird. When you guys talked, your interests lined up more than he thought they would. It was perfect.

Of course, he eventually figured out that he’d want to see you, in a more romantic context, that it is. He knew his feelings towards you were different. Honestly, he even weirdly got a little bit jealous when you mentioned how hot a specific anime character was. Ichiro didn’t necessarily plan on confessing that day….but who knows how things would turn out. Yes, it had only been three days, but he felt like he knew you already. Really, you guys always messaged each other.

The conversations would go dull for an hour or so but one link to a meme and that sparked a conversation that continued for a while. It was great. He had never felt so validated.

“L/n-san! Hey, morning!”,he said as he walked up to you. You looked like you were thinking hard about something, but Ichiro didn’t comment on it.

In fact, you were. Thinking about how you wouldn’t be able to see him so frequently. It made you….sadder than you expected. Granted you could travel to see him, but it was also due to the fact that it was the last day of the convention. Here, you could be yourselves without glancing over you shoulder every couple seconds in fear that someone you knew would spot you.  It was so much fun, especially because of him!

Its for the best though….your funds were just about dried out. You couldn’t help but smile as you saw him though,”hey, good morning to you too, ready for the last day?” Ichiro laughed,”Yes and No because this has been very exciting.” You nodded in agreement,”it has, it does suck that we cant experience this everyday.”

“well!”,Ichiro clapped his hands,”lets not worry about that and focus on having fun, okay?” Your smile got wider,”yes, okay!” Ichiro spoke,”Datteba-”, then he pointed towards you,”Yo!”, you said, the two of you giggling. This had become your thing now, apparently, but you two werent used to it, hence you laughing off you embarrassment.

You went to the artist alley and exhibit hall one last time, taking a lot more pictures together than usual, even with cosplayers! Ichiro helped you out a lo with expressing that you wanted pictures with them and that was yet another thing that you loved about him. Without even asking him to do so, he just did it on a whim, and that made you incredibly happy.

A bit later, it was closing ceremonies. It wasnt much really, but anything to just spend even a little more time with Ichiro. However, that ended sooner than you expected. And you didn’t know what to do with yourself.

The two of you sat outside on a bench.

“So, I suppose this is it…”,you said. You had to get back early today anyway. Yet, you really didn’t want to. You looked up as Ichiro spoke,”no, its not it. We still have each other’s numbers, we can make it work, I-well….these past few days have been really fun for me,”Ichiro blushed, placing his hand behind his neck. Was he going to confess? If he didn’t do it now he knew he’d procrastinate on doing so forever. He didn’t necessarily have to make sure you were his in this exact moment, but his heart wanted an answer as soon as possible, before he got in too deep.

“The thing is….I want us to be more than just friends. I just….the more we talked, the more I found myself drawn to you. Like I can tell you anything. Its really easy to be myself around you, l/n, I want...to get closer. So, would you go out with me? Or not now, I mean you can think about it but...yeah.”,he said, face blushing. He had only confessed once in his lifetime and that was during elementary….he was quickly shut down.

You….couldn’t believe your ears. Did you really manage to find someone who was interested you at an anime convention. Well, you were sure there were more interesting stories but this was still way out of your league. You even thought he was way out of your league.

“I….we can date. I feel the same, about you, I like talking to you. And I think whats making me so sad is that I cant see you...not the convention part,”you said, looking towards Ichiro and seeing his grow excited. He grabbed your hands quickly and held them,”really?! Thats great.”,he said, letting go than hugging you. Oh. This was happening. It took you a couple seconds to process the hug before you reciprocated it.

Ichiro pulled away, looking down at you, a smile on his face,”when I talk with you, I feel like the happiest and luckiest man in the world. I know love is too strong of a word right now, but I want to do my best to make you happy.”

You were so flustered that you made no response, even more so when you felt his hand on your cheek and saw him leaning in. It all happened quickly. You closed your eyes and suddenly his lips were on yours. No movement, but it lingered for a moment, before he pulled away.

That was your first...kiss. You didn’t mind that it got taken by him but still….it was so much to process. Ichiro brought you back to reality,”Ikebukuro isn’t too far from Yokohama on the train, maybe we could meet in the middle on weekends, or switch up, ah, well I guess we can talk about this letter, getting ahead of myself,”he said and chuckled, which only prompted you to let out a soft laugh. He was like an eager puppy that you wanted to pet. Weird how he so easily calmed your nerves by the sounds of your laughs.

“Datteba-”

“Yo!”

[mieczyhale]

throwing together some of my recent/ish hc posts/tags for @hellomyguru bc its a thing, babey (i have no idea what you’ve seen and what you havent bc tumblr really just suck like that so lmao)

my tags on this post::  #HELL YEAH HELL YEAH #more pride hcs!!! noice!!#i love these sfm#like klaus always taking part no matter how bad shit is bc HIS PEOPLE!!! and ben trying to punch picketers and homophobes is fucking adorbs#and i would kill (whoop) for the day klaus makes ben corporeal during pride and ben can punch all the people and then disappear#vanya’s is cute. come to the light darling!!#and diego fksgjf okay listen whether one hcs him as bi or not this is 1000% something he’d do either way#he’s supportive!!! and he has lgbtqa+ family!!! and nobody gets to be mean to his family but him!!#see also:: the first year after the apocalypse is avoided five decides to tag along when klaus saying he’s taking dave to#his very first pride. he not only enjoys himself but he learns a lot and either then or over the course of the following weeks figures his#own labels out - bc i hc five as asexual and i just have a thing for klaus being the all knowledgeable one about something for once#and his siblings learning about gender and sexuality from him and maybe discovering something new about themselves along the way!#except luther. he’s a cis hetero and we all know it#but maybe he learns to be a good ally. maybe#i mean probably not but whatever#allison is the only other person in the family who i’d even consider calling straight#bc there’s nothing wrong with being straight and i just.. dont have another label that i think fits her really well#so yeah ive got gender and sexuality hcs for them all flgkscndn happy pride month bitches

my tags on this post:: #’you’re telling me this happens every year?? for a whole month??!’ #actually i need every possible concept of dave experiencing pride month and seeing how far things have come for gays#like rainbow shit everywhere#and of course the legalization of gay marriage#out and proud gay politicians and gay people in positions of power#the amount of support that comes when homophobic shit happens now#homophobia isnt the accepted norm anymore#another thing i like is the concept of - either during pride or just in general - dave being excited to learn about the community as a whole#his boyfriend is a nonbinary pansexual and klaus has explained before what those words mean but dave wants to really understand#we stan a supportive and loving couple#dave has a lot to learn in 2019 but i think this stuff would be the most important and have the most effect on him yknow??#shit isnt perfect but its better and now he can work on getting passed the environment he was raised in#so he can hold klaus’s hand in public and kiss him around other people without panicking and eventually he proposes because HE FUCKING CAN#HE CAN DO THAT. HE CAN JUST.. ASK HIS BOYFRIEND TO MARRY HIM. LEGALLY.#good fucking shit

my tags on this post:: #did you see the state of the sky in the apocalypse?? there’s a chance he really wouldnt have noticed#i mean like yeah it could be a funny plothole#but there could also be reasons for why thats not something he noticed#or idfk man timeline shit#maybe the moon didnt explode the first time around#maybe it did and there’s just another moon somehow some way#maybe he didnt notice bc he was first too scared and then too frenzied and angry probably and then he had shit to focus on and math to do#and then dolores wanted to go on dates to the local wine cellars and flat empty areas that used to be parks and then there was spending days#in the library together like having a girlfriend is a lot of work okay#maybe five just didnt have the time to slowdown and consider things like space#maybe his headspace was too fucked#sometimes you just forget about the moon - i know i do!#so sfgksncjf okay y e ah

my tags on this post:: #YES!!! #yes yes yes #okay #so#everytime someone mentions or even hints at dave having anger issues i wanna fucking cheer bc thats one of my biggest hcs for him#like yeah he’s sweet and gentle and respectful and all that - genuinely a good man - our lil jewish gay#BUT#he did grow up in the 50s and 60s which as op said would have surrounded him with a lot of toxic masculinity. now i dont think he would be#a toxic kind of masculine AT ALL but it definitely would have forced him to hide his emotions and feelings and idk hobbies and of course his#sexuality. and i say hobbies bc there isnt a canon answer for it i dont think but i personally hc dave as being someone who loves art#specifically: drawing. dave keeping a lil sketchbook and some pencils under the pillow on his cot in vietnam?? yes please#so anyway yeah - he wouldnt have really had any good examples of how to properly take care of your anger - although he has enough#heart and common sense to know its really fucking wrong to take it out on women and children and people one is dating WHICH - another hc i#have that ties into this is that somehow his dad found out that he’s gay and beat the crap out of him over it. because unfortunately thats a#thing that happens. so his main male example was an abusive pos. and then he goes to vietnam which is fine because its not like he has#anyone stateside that will miss him - that will talk to him anymore - and its a warzone so there are a lot of ways to work out your anger#and yeah that of course includes bar fights. and he does - usually - try and keep a hold on his anger until he’s away from anyone who might#feel threatened - and he doesnt wanna end up taking out an innocent on accident - but he’s not actually perfect and so sometimes he fails#and it happens around klaus one time and seeing his love’s reaction - the making himself smaller - trying to hide - going quiet and so#clearly afraid - and not just afraid but afraid OF HIM - freezes him to the core where he stands because nobody has ever reacted like that#before. or if they have he never noticed or cared because they didnt matter. but this is klaus. his klaus. who he loves and would never do#anything to hurt him. his klaus who he protects and defends and knows he wants to spend his life with - no matter how impossible it is#he wants to go to klaus and apologize - try to undo the damage done simply by him raising his voice and lashing out - but he doesnt know#what to say or how to say it - he doesnt know what to do with the situation honestly. so he leaves the tent and goes to take his renewed#anger and frustration out on whatever he can find so he can calm down and hopefully get into the right headspace to have whats#no doubt going to be a really hard conversation with his boyfriend. because where do you even start??#but of course they talk it out and dave promises to work on his anger and on how he lets it out and yknow.. its dave so klaus trusts him and#it takes some time - there are some incidents - but dave works hard and learns a lot from klaus - including how to unlearn a lot of shit he#grew up with - and its rough but having a partner from the future who breaks all kinds of barriers definitely helps#so y eah. those are my brief feelings on it and i wanna marry op 

my tags on this post::   #!!!!!!!!!!!! #YES #i adore this post#i could never pinpoint why the introduction on the bus made me feel like That but this is it!!#its just so sweet and innocent - even surrounded by other soldiers in the middle of a warring country#the innocence and unbearable fucking adorableness of their first convo on that bus just… its so bright and lovely it makes everything else disappear#the only thing that matters is the two guys getting to experience that ‘o h’ moment for the first time in their lives bc their childhoods#never let them have that #i assume#bc like op said klaus didnt go to a regular school and he wasnt p much stuck in that house and then he was on the streets so#and for dave like.. i guess he could’ve had that moment in school? but it would’ve been one-sided and he never would have#told anyone. 1960s. gay jewish man. yeah.#they’re each others first (and only) loves and i just really fucking adore that and live off of posts about them 

my tags on this post:: #what if he wasnt dead-dead though???#bc like… the day five found them all dead was apparently the day the apocalypse happened right? so its not like they’d been dead for days#weeks or w.e yknow??#and the time between klaus dying and coming back is varying and undetermined - there’s no canon timing for the length of his deaths#so what if he came back to life??#like okay i know its not really possible in canon bc five buried them i think?? or is that a fanon thing??#i cant remembering #anyway#but still - in general klaus not being permanently dead in the apocalypse is another possibility#and five didnt know about it bc after finding them all he began his 45 year journey#and klaus wakes up alone and essentially has to learn to survive and he doesnt know five was ever there bc..well.. yeah#five is long gone#maybe klaus lives out his days in that wasteland#and he doesnt remember it where five does bc five time traveled back and klaus didnt. the klaus that got stuck in the#apocalypse is a different klaus - like a different timeline. the klaus from ep1 never got stuck in the destroyed future so#he’d have no knowledge or memories of it or anything#or - second thought - he kills himself at some point after waking up and either begs god to let him stay dead or he strikes some kind of#deal with her so he doesnt have to return to whats left of earth#oooo or something happened that put a lock on his powers?? like yknow those cuffs and devices and stuff in stuff in fantasy that freeze the#users abilities?? that’d be an interesting plotpoint bc then like who did it and why and what was the last day really like? yknow#vanya’s meds but More is the idea #just a thought#but anyway idk im just a big fan of klaus with the inability to die and all the possibilities that brings 

my tags on this post::   #i’ve actually never stopped to consider why he didnt notice them except for my v first tua watch-thru#which is odd bc like that seems like a thing one should notice after a few watches??#but w.e #anyway#my only other hc for that part of the episode isnt that klaus didnt notice them bc he’s used to guns#it’s that he didn’t hear them#or that they weren’t loud enough -to him- to register as gunfire initially#bc like one of my close hcs is that he has bad hearing. growing up with people screaming in your ears 24-7 365 can’t exactly be good for#his ears now can it? and with how loud some of them are and how close they can get to him - without touching him - that’s just.. a lot of#fucking volume okay#now add in the academy’s mission alert siren#how loud he listens to his music with headphones on when he’s trying to drown out some REALLY LOUD SCREAMING#and then being near gunfire growing up. those bank robbers had guns and weren’t exactly a big distance away#all the raves and clubs and parties he goes to?? places where music is played so loud the room shakes and you cant hear anything else and#the music itself can be heard from blocks away?? that’s an indeterminable amount of intense noise#and then of course the gunfire of vietnam#so like… boys ears have SUFFERED. whether they wanna acknowledge that in canon or not#so the shooting at the theater - the shooting thats IN the theater - which is large and meant to house sound#thats happening across a big city street from where they’re standing and they’re behind the food truck and if klaus was ordering when it all#started that was just another level of sound and he’s not exactly focused bc everything is awful yknow?? so either it takes him a second to#notice or register it on his own or maybe he doesnt and ben says something?? idk but that’s kinda the field i’ve landed on for that scene#not that im not here for op’s hc!!! bc it really is a good one and it makes sense. im just rambling my own theory here bc i like considering#the Ways for Things sometimes. esp with klaus involved. this does make me wonder tho… if his hearing somehow is -fine- in canon…. h o w?#bc like bitch who tf can take all that and have perfect hearing?? thats gotta be impossible. if they are fine is it related to his powers#somehow?? like.. does his casual passing between life and death all the time mean he doesnt have mortal ear weaknesses? its weird but im..#i’ve got theories. 

my tags on this post:: #probably in the massive fucking pockets of his fluffy coat#see also:: a dealer’s place #a boyfriend’s place#an ex-boyfriend who is also a dealer’s place#a girlfriend’s place #a partner’s place#all ex’s of course bc dave is the only valid romantic relationship#he made friends with the person who owns a nearby thrift store and they help him out#he has a locker at a public place like the ymca#he only has one outfit before returning to the mansion so he has nothing to carry - ever on the move#he thiefs off of people in rehab and crackhouses he stayed in that are dumb enough to leave their shit unattended#when he sees something he likes or he feels its time for an outfit change#he mostly sticks with his lace up pants as far as bottom pieces go bc its much harder to sneak away with skirts#and the kind of crazy pants he likes. there’s only room for one pair of pants for this pan disaster#after returning to the mansion he has access to the funky gay clothes he had managed to aquire before leaving all those years ago#bc like… i kinda hc that he got out of there fast and probably higher than fuck and had nothing packed#have you ever tried to pack while high?? it’s harder than it has any right to be#crack theory:: he had a bag - we just never saw it bc in the beginning he wore it under his floofy coat bc safety and he didnt need it the#rest of the time.#i have a lot of thoughts and headcanony opinions about klaus’s time on the streets so thank u#for giving me a place to dump some of them   

[karmanticmoved]

1-85 uwu

j esus okay

1. describe yourself.

uh,, emotional ig, dumbass, quiet, exhausted all of the time, v queer, healthy mix of feminine and masculine, insecure, and not tha t great tbh. kinda a pussy ass b itch

2. if you could go anywhere for a week all expenses paid where would it be?

idrk. maybe somewhere like a hella nice beach in another country, maybe somewhere in europe. i like travelling but i hate the travel to get there and have no money so i havent put thought into it. maybe hawaii or somewhere like that.

3. do you have siblings?

the one thats still alive is my half brother

4. what is your favorite constellation, why?

orion maybe bc i don't know a lot but i can see that one from my bedroom window even in the city n idk. its comforting. or scorpius cause i'm a scorpio

5. favorite color.

yellow, pink, or blue.

6. what kind of music do you listen to?

almost anything. whatever catches my interest.

7. favorite flower. (you can name as many as you want cause flowers are awesome)

forgot what i said last time but those

yellow carnations i think?

8. if you could do magic, what is the first spell you would learn?

maybe smth to put myself to sleep immediately bc f uCk

9. favorite childhood memory.

my summer camp memories are pretty great. also memories of my dad and i going fishing are good.

10. have you ever been cheated on?

i mean in theory i couldve been bc online relationships but no. n im polyam and have identified as such for a majority of my relationships so no.

11. if you could describe your perfect room, what would it be?

big but not too big, yknow? like big enough that it can be filled and have room to walk around and lay on the ground or whatever but not Empty. and a pretty big bed to stretch out on, n a closet in the room. multiple windows w blackout curtains so theres light but it can be blocked out. n fluffy rugs or carpeting but preferably rugs in case smth spills so we can get it out of at least Remove the rug. and probably a cat tree thing in corner for dipper. n a computer desk and actual lights that light up the whole room. but probably,, fairy lights too bc full lights too bright. and i kinda want a pink room but blue or yellow work also. a nd pride flags on the walls + posters and various other stuff bc plain walls are boring. and tons n tons of b ooks too.

12. favorite animal.

river otter

13. what was the last photo you took of?

cat

14. do you believe in soul mates?

i'm not sure. i do kinda think there are people who you will like. really really click with and who become so important in your life that they're like. apart of u yknow? but i don't think that anyone as an individual needs to keep those people in their life forever. they arent destined to stay with them, and they shouldnt force that relationship (platonic, familial, romantic, or whatever) even if they were close for years and years. screw destiny. youll have people you care about, and sometimes you have to break that bond to save yourself, and thats okay. there will be other people who can and will be just as important. that got kinda off topic skbsks. i don't think theres really like Destiny soulmates. but there could be like. soulmates in the sense of for however long we're together, we're soul bonded. even if its not forever. does that even make se nse skbsns

15. do you hang toilet paper over or under?

over is the one thats socially acceptable right

16. your go to place to eat & your favorite thing to get there.

idk theres a place near a movie theater closeish to my house and its a nice little cafe and i dont eat there bc i dont eat much in general but i get their bubble tea and i love. raspberry bubble tea w rose popping bubbles. its comfort drink.

17. do you believe everything happens for a reason?

no. sometimes shit happens for no reason, and its bullshit, but you can't reverse it, so you gotta figure out how to move on from it.

18. guilty pressures?

im assuming thats meant to be pleasures

umm,, idrk. i don't know what exactly i like that would count as a guilty pleasure so,,

19. favorite mythical creature, why?

merpeople are s o cool i fuckin. love funky aquatic pals hell yeah. maybe im just Water babey but. they're rad. dragons are also hella cool bc like dragons???? theyre scaly and prett y and can breathe fire or have wings and kill u?? also like selkies bc again. water. but i used to hear a lot of stories abt them and theyre so nea t

20. something most people don’t know about you.

i have the potential to be a huge asshole and also kinda Wish to fuckin murder someone sometimes but. i act nice most of the time anyway.

not murder murder but i can get angr y enough that i just wanna Stab smth

21. where did you grow up, what was it like?

grew up kinda near the edge of the city, still in it but not like the main city area. in western washington. it was kinda rly boring, i used to spend a lot more time outside or just by myself playing with leaves or toys or whatever. when i had friends i played make believe w them even when outside of school. so yeah. boring id say.

22. do you believe aliens exist?

sure.

23. what was your last google search?

other than names for some actors n stuff, i was looking up various star wars things

24. what did your last relationship teach you?

the one that like. ended? i guess thatd be. be careful with your own feelings and try to figure them out before jumping into anything, and also don't try to force smth that in reality isnt really working.

25. would you relocate for love?

honestly yeah

26. do you hold grudges or forgive easy?

both. it just depends on how badly i or someone i care about was hurt by it. more likely to hold a grudge if a friend was hurt by someone d eep enough to leave a lasting impact or if they don't get a genuine apology i will be 🔫🔫. or if the person keeps hurting them. even if that person is also my friend.

27. favorite book.

favorite graphic novel is bloom by kevin panetta

favorite books in general are autoboyography, more happy than not, and what if its us. all gay. i know. its okay. im a kinnie.

28. do you consider yourself an extrovert or introvert?

introvert by far

29. have you ever kept a journal, do you now?

i tried once. i probably will have to once i go see a therapist, or at least one for my Bad Thoughts

30. top 5 favorite movies.

in no particular order

little shop of horrors, love simon, coco, it (2017 and 1990), and shazam! ig? maybe others but i definitely Forgot all the shit ive watched

31. do you believe that everything happens for a reason?

no

32. what is your greatest fear?

definitely gotta be all of the people i love hating me and abandoning me or secretly hating me and then leaving me without saying anything. and the worst part is im always afraid its gonna happen babeyy

33. favorite alcoholic beverage.

im baby

34. most embarrassing thing you’ve done.

im embarrassed by my own existence. i don't remember the Most embarrassing thing

35. do you believe in ghosts?

not until i have proof that i can actually trust and believe in

36. what is the best and worst part of your personality?

idk ig im nice. but im also. very easily set off on certain emotions especially the bad ones which sucks like especially jealousy bc i dont wanna!! feel jealous!! tho i think that ties into my greatest fear bc my brain immediately tells me im useless to everyone and they hate me. but. sometimes i get jealous and then feel bad for that and then hate myself for all of it. bc my friends deserve to hang out w other people and care about other people im just fucking stupid babey !!

37. should you split the dinner bill?

i rly don't get why you wouldnt tbh like if u both wanna be there u should both pay. but if one person gonna pay it should be the person that asked.

38. are you a good liar?

most of the time. when it comes to my mental health i can either lie great or im literally breaking down in front of the person so

39. what keeps you up at night?

depressing thoughts. anxiety about everything. wishing i could cuddle and fall asleep w jay. sometimes i just cant sleep bc im too restless.

40. would you rather go without your phone or music?

music. i need my phone to text my friends and i Need my friends

41. do you believe in god?

what god would let the world get to the point its at. what god would allow people to do such fucked up shit.

no. i don't.

42. how do you relax when frustrated?

cry, take a nap, take a shower, listen to music, cuddle dipper

43. what’s something that offends you?

when people go "oh yeah i support gay rights but im still gonna eat at chick fil a bc its good" like i get so fucking. pissed off by that. youre not gonna fucking s ta rv e without their goddamn chicken. i know a bi person who goes there and says its okay bc they dont Directly Give Their money to Specifically anti gay organisations but im just. ugh. fucking pissed bc there are other places to get food just avoid the one place for fucks sake. their food is good it doesnt matter. its like saying yeah pewdiepie is a bad person and nazi and a racist asshole but his videos r funni haha so im gonna watch him anyway

44. favorite food

i hate myself whenever i eat food

45. if you were on a 10 hour flight and could sit and talk to any person the entire time, who would it be?

@destinedformuchmore or @pinaplelee

46. when do you feel the most confident?

never? but ig i feel confident when working on tech construction during theater tech. as long as i know what im doing.

47. what do you do in your free time?

sleep. draw. cry. play video games. talk to my friends.

48. is there anyone who has completely lost your respect

matpat did for being a dick abt neopronouns and making a transphobic joke and only apologizing when a cis person told him to. not when hundreds of trans people did. and also other jokes that are inherently offensive to various groups. a n d for making extremely not Child friendly jokes in his videos which are very much targeted towards kids. say what you will about the target audience, there are a lot of children who watch them. please stop making creepy nsfw jokes if you won't even swear, sir.

49. have you ever broken someone’s heart?

i guess so yeah. but she also broke mine first.

50. did/do you play sports in school?

i did. i don't anymore bc highschool sports are bullshit but. basketball, ultimate, and soccer.

51. when are you happiest?

talkin 2 jay prolly

52. coffee or tea?

tea

53. what is one possession you own you wouldn’t want to live without?

my binder. or my stuffed cat puppet thing ive had since i was 7

54. what is the first thing you notice about a person?

their general emotions, mostly. like if theyre in a good mood or if theyre bored or distracted or whatever. or if they seem interested in actually talking to me

55. what is your favorite season, why?

fall. my birthday, the atmosphere is nice, it's pretty, its hoodie weather.

56. what makes you laugh?

stupid little comments or jokes my friends make tend to make me laugh a lot harder than i should but jabdn

57. are you a clean or messy person?

a mix. i Cannot have some things messy or i will ksjqkd. Die but i don't make my bed too often bc its ha rd when its against 3 walls.

58. what is important for a successful relationship?

communication communication communicati

talk about ur goddamn problems n keep talking to each other.

59. what was your upcoming like?

if thats supposed to be upbringing

idk, very relaxed. pretty easygoing and kinda boring.

60. favorite holiday?

any holiday in december rly. i don't celebrate a Lot but the atmosphere and others celebrating is nice to see. i kinda wish my parents did more to embrace the jewish part in our family blike. whatever. christmas is fun.

61. what is the first thing you’d do if you won the lottery?

give half of it to my parents. and then probably use it for plane ticket

62. what’s the best pizza topping combination?

hawaiian pizza. pinapple n canadian bacon ty

63. favorite outdoor activity.

frisbee

64. how are you? honestly.

not great. i want highschool to end.

65. would you rather go camping in the woods or stay at a beach resort?

idk. camping is fun but if i get to stay at the resort for free i would rly love 2 stay at a resort tbh ive never done that

66. what is the most beautiful thing in nature?

waterfalls. or rivers or just. water in nature. and very green forests. aNd snow.

67. favorite type of candy?

none

68. if your life was a book, what would be the title?

i can and will do arson, an autobiography

69. what movie quotes do you use of a regular bases?

i quote john mulaney and whatever my obsessions are pretty regularly

70. what was cool when you were young but not cool now?

silly bandz. pokemon cards. these weird unicorn figures i collected

71. what’s the craziest conversation you have ever eves dropped on?

im mostly the one having the weird conversations

72. what’s the most interesting documentary you’ve ever watched?

i watched one about dogs and cats and their evolution which was lit

73. what’s the worst hairstyle you’ve had?

when i let the lady just go fuckin ham on my hair bc i was watching spirit that horse movie and didnt wanna stop so it was. rly bad bangs and hella short in back but not the sides

74. what do you like to cook?

whatever im hungry for. i don't have the energy to cook a lot

75. what’s the coolest animal you’ve seen in the wild?

really pretty tropical fish

76. what’s the funniest tv show you’ve ever seen?

idk. i rly like schitts creek its pretty amusing

77. do you usually follow your heart or your head?

heart at first but my head if things get bad

78. what is your favorite quote?

"i have a splitting headache and i think i'm dying. how are you?"

or a character just saying "try harder" when another failed to do smth.

this is supposed to be deep or whatever but im in a Mood

79. what’s the weirdest crush you have ever had?

once had a crush on a character in a minecraft parody lmao

80. what’s your love language?

sending shit that makes me think of them. n just. making tons of stuff for them both online and irl like bracelets.

81. do you ever feel alone?

oh yeah. all the time. im not but it feels like i am which sucks

82. ever been bullied?

yeah

83. are you usually early or late?

late bc of my parents rip

84. what kind of art do you enjoy most?

drawing, or writing. also theater.

85. what do you wish you knew more about?

i just wish i could remember everything ive learned more about. i know a lot i just forget all.

id like to know more about forensics tho

[hircmi-blog]

╰ 𝗦𝗔𝗡𝗔 𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗔𝗧𝗢𝗭𝗔𝗞𝗜, 𝗖𝗜𝗦 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗔𝗟𝗘, 𝗦𝗛𝗘/𝗛𝗘𝗥. hiromi 'mimi' nakamura. twenty-two. heiress/tattoo artist. her family is using her tattoo shop to launder money for a local cartel. glitter smudged underneath your eyes, trading whispers in a dark room, and biting into an apple just to realize it's rotten.

backstory ! (drugs tw)

originally hailing from tokyo, japan, the nakamura’s are legacies. coming from a long line of business men on her father’s side, they were old money even before hiromi’s father and uncle started what would eventually become a multi-billion dollar energy company. 

nakamura industries grew and grew faster than anyone could have predicted. not wanting to miss an opportunity, the nakamura’s packed up and made the move to los angles california exactly a year before hiromi was born. 

turns out they weren’t as prepared for the move as they thought /: one bad investment and the loss of a substantial amount of money later, hiromi’s uncle is the one who made the decision to get help from some more than shady business partners

in return for saving nakamura industries, these new business partners only had one condition: the nakamura’s would have to find a way to help launder money for their cartel. the task had seemed easy enough but as the years passed they only got deeper and deeper into criminal activity. there was a lot of secrecy surrounding the nakamura name because of this, as well as a lot of whispers from other people questioning their success, but nobody could prove anything illegal was going on

she’s the middle child! she has three older siblings ( two brothers and a sister ) and one younger brother. there was a lot of pressure for her older siblings, especially the boys, to take over the family business one day so their upbringing was a lot tougher than hiromi’s and her younger brother’s was. because of that there was a bit of a strain in their relationships, and hiromi was really only close to her younger brother growing up. 

all the nakamura siblings led very elusive lives. since they were all aware to some degree of their family’s involvement with the cartel, they all learned to keep people at a distance and not to talk about family with anyone which kind of translated into making it hard for hiromi and her siblings to really make what felt like real friends ):

not to make her a cliche middle child but....she really was ignored ??? for the most part like her parents loved her and stuff but it was obvious where their priorities and where their attention went. when she was little it made her sad but the more she grew up she kinda just accepted it as the way things were and just used the fact that they weren’t breathing down her neck 24/7 to her advantage

which is why she got really good at finding that validation and attention she wasn’t getting from her parents elsewhere as she grew up (whoring around), and got even better at talking herself out of trouble. turns out she had a talent for words, for knowing when to drop her last name, and knowing when to shut up and bat her eyes. being reckless like this was her own secret rush. she knew it would be dangerous for herself and her family if she ever got into any real trouble, but the possibility of it was so addictive she really couldn’t stop. 

what started out as simply partying turned into a full blown addiction. she was out clubbing almost every night, close with just about every bouncer in beverly hills, always going wild but she made sure to keep her stunts within the four walls of the clubs she frequented. at home she was back to being careful, but when she was alone away from her family she could be whoever she wanted

becoming a tattoo artist had always been something hiromi had wanted to do, so when her parents said for her 20th birthday they’d buy her her own shop, she didn’t turn their offer down. turns out their intentions had little to do with making her dreams come true and everything to do with the fact that they needed another business where they could launder money through. her tattoo shop would become one of many businesses the nakamura’s owned or co owned (some others being a hotel, a strip club, a restaurant and even a hair salon) purely to keep their promise to the cartel 

not wanting the fact that she had her own shop to be completely spoiled, hiromi agreed to let her parents launder money so long as she herself didn’t have to be directly involved. they agreed and she went on pretending like nothing was going own although the thought is always at the back of her head

she managed to build up a good rep for herself though thanks to social media!! being in beverley hills her clientele naturally ended up being a good mix between everyday people, social media influencers, models, and even a couple of actual known celebrities o: now that she has her own actual business she’s tried to keep her wild side in check, but temptation is everywhere!

personality + tidbits !

she goes by mimi, never hiromi. sometimes people call her hiro or romi, but mimi is definitely the most popular of all her nicknames and what she uses for all her social media. 

she’s kind of hard to get to know /: not in the sense that she’s purposely cold or rude, but she can come across as intimidating or detached a lot because it takes her a while to open up to people. even with those closest to her she still struggles, often keeping a lot of personal stuff to herself in a way that gets frustrating when people who care about her see her upset but refusing to open up about it. shes the type of person you can know for years only to realize you barely know anything about her

when she’s partying with you, though, that’s the easiest way to become her friend!!! another reason why she likes to abuse things like party drugs and alcohol as often as she does is because they make her feel a lot more open and receptive to making real connections

she has a bad habit of seeking validation from others, which mostly manifests as her being overly sexually promiscuous to the point where shes kinda dependent on being desired as a way of feeling good about herself </3

not a very good influence.....like....at all DWJDJWDJW will 100% be the person egging you on in situations where she should really be doing the opposite.

she’s just generally....ambiguous with her morals because of the way she grew up. being as impulsive as she is, she can come off as selfish sometimes just because stopping and considering the consequences of her actions isnt something she usually does

but she tries for those she’s closest to! she values her friendships a lot more than she probably lets on. vulnerability isn’t her strong suit at all but shes working on it /: 

shes also the worst at keeping plans or showing up to things on time like JSBJDWBJDW this bitch is always disappearing if you want her to show up to anything you better drive her there yourself 

she loooooves tattooing her pals she’s always trying to sweet talk people into getting more tats! if you know her though you know you better not be getting your tats elsewhere or shes gonna be big mad 

deadass the type to be like no i dont hold grudges (: but then subconsciously hold that resentment in and lash out even though she said she’s over something.....shes a scorpio JSBDWJBDJWBJDWBDJW 

she has a habit of buying friends ridiculously expensive things even the most mundane gifts (like a bottle of wine) always end up costing a ridiculous amount of money and its never on purpose she just gravitates towards the finer things in life and she doesnt even realize

this shit is so long ive been doing this for hours JSBJDWBDJWBDJW i hate intros bc my charas always change once i start writing and rping but thats fine now we all have a base <3333

sum connection ideas

sexy plots period. exes, fwb, ex fwb, enemies with benefits, whatever ! whore rights !

angsty plots period...ex friendships </3 enemies </3 everything i listed above ...

sad plots period! unrequited love mayahps ? idk man im just spitting words

some cute ones too though we love balance.....give me best friends 🥺 maybe someone who can be a good influence on her....some cute crush shit....sibling like friendships <3333

ppl she tattoos, a roomie?, ppl she goes clubbing with, maybe someone she used to go clubbing with but stopped bc one night they were out something bad happened o:, idk what else i really tried JSDBWBDJWBDJWBDJWBDJW

[maureenbrown]

spy au w/ saphael

war with love

so simon is a spy and everything

he gets sent to be roomies with raphael and befriend him

and then to go to a wedding where valentine will be there and take him out

and at first everything is cute! and domestic and fluffy!

like they meet in chapter one and backgrounds are established

and in chapter two they get a little bit more domestic where simon is a night owl and raphael has these late shifts and falls asleep on simon

and then theres a city tour!! and near the end there is this open mic singing thing and so obviously they go bc simon and raphael sings and simon is just w o w

meeting!! raphaels!! friends!! and learning more about the past. and this wanting to learn spanish for raphael and also a fancyish meal

raphael learns that simon is learning spanish and teases him lke a lil loser but is also really happy. then they find vida mia snow and sim gets sad bc he doesnt wanna leave raphael ever

then theres more opening up (via viddia atta girl) and their first kiss and stuff. or maybe that hapens in the last chapter idk. simon also gets a job at a flowers place NERD

he gets flowers for like. everything

they go out shopping and also they go out clubbing and simon gets drunk and he makes out with someone who isnt raphael and has sex by mistake

bc now they’re exclusive and raphael is sosososo upset and that trust is betrayed

and they fight and simon feels like shit and he almost leaves bc valentine isnt worth this pain

but he stays. raphael is worth it. vidia is worth it.

its super awkward tension bt it slowly defuses down and raphael finally is willing to talk

and he forgives simon bc he will always forgive simon

and they fall into a familier patter and simon finally meets raph’s family

and then its the pre wedding days where again flower everywhere and theres a job loss confession on raphael’s behalf poor bby

they get matching outfits and simon is reminded of his mission and so he does it well and thats good

and wedding day huge slurs are also thrown around a possible fight but its all okay.

and then simon finds out raphael is an assassin and his next mark is simon so he runs with vidia.

end of war with love.

relationships with other characters

magnus bane

magnus knows both parties and will not take sides

he consoles raphael and his heart goes out to simon

when raphael decides to leave the orginzation magnus supports him and gives him lita

raphael spends years looking for simon but he never asks magnus bc he would never pressure his friend like that

he also knows about lita and loves her and is like a father to her

lightwood siblings

alec finds out thru magnus and after a while he listens

and he realizes that yeah raphael is a lil shit but hes alsoa good person

not all monsters do terrible things and so he develops a relationship and in actuality he also uses raphael to make sure simon and his family stay safe

eventually izzy finds out bc alec can never keep anything fro her

and izzy and raphael!! have a great friendship!!

they speak spansh to each other and are so comfortable with each other and are so good in fighting and sparring

and its so awkward when simon finds out that they knew this whole time but never said anything

but neither of them would betray the other bc friendship

clace

they never knew about raph

and are super pissed with simon

but they work with him and as time goes on they get a little bit easier with him

mydia

so this is in another universe and like mia and raphael have a pretty damn good relationship

and he tells her and she comforts him when hes at his lowest

she and lydia have a thing and its so secretive no one knows [but raph, and magnus. and simon shh]

and lydia is besties with simon in this universe and kinda found out on accident??

shes a spy ffs she overheard some shit and investigated

it led to a h u g e mydia fight

regardless they made up and they also kinda know the story individually and arent taking sides

they just love both people want want the bet i love them

mia and vidia get along great once the initial shock is over tbqh its awesome

and like mia and lita already besties so its a+

vidia mia rose [backstory]

so saphael fund this poor baby girl all abandoned and obviously took her in

simon wanted to name her after a disney fairy FUCKING NERD but raphael wanted to name her after his sister and so they came to a compromise where her first name would be vidia and her middle name mia after IZZY!! SISTER! OC!!! and her last name snow bc they found her on a bench and she was so delicately wrapped she looked so soft

they took her in and raphael is really good with kids with and simon is so!!

her mother couldnt take care of her she left a note and its so movie-like its almost sounds fake.

since they dont know her birthday they decided it would be on the day they found her.

gay. as. hell.

BIRTHDAY:

FANCAST: zendaya

vidia mia rose [personality]

nicknames include: dia, viddie (it was a dumb nickname by jace bye) and mini mia or mm! by raphael and lita calls her snow (no one else)

shes likes a gryffindor - ravenclaw

like a hanna marin x aria montgomery

shes extremely stubborn in her eays and refuses to back down even if she knows that shes in the wrong

and like really reckless and does dangerous things just for the fun of it

she also would die for her friends and family (she hates that raphael is a part of that)

and like really quick witted which is why she and lita clash so much at first

and shes so lazy but knows randm facts about random things

shes so into history and loves analyzing things bye

shes also really gifted musically wise like she can sing and since simon always sang and played guitar she did too

but there s some raphael in her like she ended up playing piano instead. and like i said really protective and quickwitted

she wants to be remembered for something and wants to do great things but also?? nothing is special about her (or so she thinks)

tales of a fairy;; vidia mia snow

lita aubree snow [backstory]

she was in the system and it sucked

so she ran away and tried to pickpocket magnus bane and obviously failed

but he saw the potential in her and didnt wanna turn her into a spy so he gave her to raphael and she became like his right hand man

shes met all of his family and has trained with him and honestly?? there is no one she trusts more

she doesnt see him as a father figure tho. like a teacher yeah mentor would be the better word

and she thinks that she owes him everything

raphael sees her skill set bc obviously she can thieve p well and he hones in the pick pocketing better. and shes also a grifter

she loves raphael, she loves the family that she found on her own

even tho shes hella insecure about who she is and why her parents dont love her

BIRTHDAY:

FANCAST: janella salvador

lita aubree snow [personality]

nicknames include: lina, las, or any of her other identities, bree (usually raphael only), and when she and vidia are going at it, mine or reeree [aubREE] bc nERDS

shes like raphael and magnus a huffie slytherin

like sophie deveroux but more sarcastic x alison dilaurentis?

shes really patient and can wait to get what she wants. and can enetrain herself for hours/days

shes really charismatic people are just drawn in, and they /want/ to meet her

and thats where her manipulative side comes out like gets people to trust her and then uses it to her advantage

she teases and knows how to use people. shes so cunning and also doesnt know who she is

shes a grifter and has so many facades but who is she really? is she a good person? lita is so insecure about herself and its the worst she gets really bad

shes hardworking and puts her heart and soul into things and also will defend the people she loves

and thats where she and vidia clash so much

shes also really flirtatious (thanks to magnus) and flirts with everyone bc secrets and she likes to hook up

it takes a lot to get her trust and if you break up you done son.

she wants to be someone people whisper about years from now but. is she a good enough person?

pansexual and hooks up with anyone cute

flowers blooming in winter;; lita aubree snow

fairys and flowers destroy each other

battlescars  young god  anything you can do i can do better  give your heart a break  

[donnarider]

!!DISCONTINUED!!  Klance - soulmate au (part 4)

Author’s notes:

update 12th July 2019: This story is unfortunately discontinued. There will not be a next part. I’m really sorry.

Read part 1

Read part 2

Read part 3

“Bold” texts are from Keith, “italic” texts are from Lance

„Wow, that’s… rough?“

„Yes it is! I mean… I meant what I said. I just thought he would...”

“Say that he wants to be more than friends?”

“Yeah…” Lance put his head on the table they were studying at. The library was quiet and Lance had a hard time keeping his voice down while telling Hunk about his horrible not-date date.

“So how did the rest of the da…what happened after that?”

“Well, I was dying on the inside and pretended everything was fine on the outside. So, the usual.”

“Lance!”

Lance sighed and leaned back on his chair. The library’s ceiling suddenly seemed very fascinating to him. “We talked about stuff like favourite movies and such. I asked him about his bike. I had to leave for my seminar and he said he’d text me.”

“Well that doesn’t sound too bad,” Hunk decided and squeezed Lance’s shoulder supportively. “Maybe he just needs some time?”

“And what do I do if he doesn’t? I thought I’d be fine with being just friends but-,” he waved his hands around in a helpless motion. “I was basically doomed when he told me to be nice to my coffee in Spanish. I can’t just NOT crush on him now, you know. And that sucks… big time.”

Hunk smiled sympathetically at him and continued to flip through the book in front of him. “Just take it slow. Take a break for a few days and then invite him to do something and see what it feels like then. He’ll either change his mind or you could just bring me and Pidge along to make the friends thing easier. Maybe that’ll help?”

“Hmm. Yeah, maybe.”

Hunk closed his book and got up. “You up for visiting Pidge and Matt? I don’t think we’re gonna get anything done here right now. Also I think Matt finally got that video game you wanted to play so badly.”

“Nooo, Hunk. You wanted to study. I didn’t mean to distract you, I’m just gonna-“

“It’s fine, Lance. I can’t concentrate anyways. And you helped me so much with my last essay, I think I can go a day without studying.”

Lance smiled at him and got to his feet as well. “Okay. But I swear I’ll be back to normal tomorrow and then we’re gonna take a look at the stuff from Iverson’s physics lecture.” Hunk groaned loudly and made Lance laugh with his desperate expression. “I know, I know. But we both have to get better at that stuff.” He stood behind Hunk and made a gesture over his shoulder like he wanted to show Hunk a beautiful landscape.

“NASA, dude. NASA.”

“Ugh, you’re right. But Matt and Pidge now. My brain needs a break.”

Lance swung his backpack over his shoulder. “Maybe I get one of Pidge’s hugs. I love Pidge’s hugs.”

Hunk beside him nodded. “Everyone does, man. They’re the best.”

Wednesday

 (3:15am): WTF DUDE? ???

(3:17am): I KNOW SORRY! Its our stupid neighbors having a party…

(3:18am): AT T HIS HOU R???

(3:18am): pls kill them for me

(3:20am): I would but prison isnt as appealing to me as you might think

(3:21am): So ur bad boy attitude knows boundaries? ;)

(3:22am): Dont mock me Im too tired for this

(3:24am): Yeh I can feel that

(3:24am): u really dont deal well without ur beauty sleep

(3:25am): Sorry :( And no, I really dont

 (3:31am): KEEEEEEITHH do smth!!!!

(3:32am): I have a test tomorrow !!

(3:34am): OM G IT STOPPED

(3:35am): Keith?

(3:35am): did u kill them?

(3:36am): maybe

(3:36am): KE ITH!

(3:37am): I slipped an anonymous note under their door that I would kill their cat if they didnt turn off the music immediately…

(3:38am): O M G thats cruel

(3:38am): u dont threaten peoples pets

(3:38am): NOT COOL!

(3:39am): chill, I was joking. It said Id call the cops on them

(3:40am): Oh okay good hope ur not just saying that

(3:40am): Also thankk

(3:41am): no problem. Good night, Lance

(3:43am): Lance?

 (7:36am): SORRY FELL ASLEEP!

(7:37am): Have fun at work today :)

Friday

(4:12pm): why

(4:25pm): what? u dont like it? ;)

(4:28pm): no

(4:29pm): oh come on! The queen is my best study motivation!

(4:30pm): please just stop

(4:32pm): KEITH! YOU INSULT BEYONCÉ YOU INSULT ME

(4:33pm): Can’t you study to something normal

(4:35pm): Normal normal or you normal?

(4:36pm): I dont care. Just no more beyoncé please. It’s been hours

(4:39pm): Lance?

 (4:42pm): really?

(4:42pm): Evanescence? That’s mature…

(4:43pm): WAKE ME UP INSIDE

(4:43pm): WAKE ME UP INSIIIDE

(4:45pm): I hate you

(4:46pm): No u dont :)

(4:47pm): STOP THIS MADNESS!

(4:48pm): Hunk says if you come to a college thing with us tomorrow, he’ll stop me for you

(4:50pm): What kind of thing?

(4:51pm): dunno, Hunk wont say, but its really good apparently

(4:53pm): OKAY DEAL NOW PLEASE STOP

(4:54pm): Party-pooper

(4:56pm): Tell Hunk I love him

Keith got off his bike, took off his helmet and unzipped his leather jacket. He headed towards the university building with mixed feelings about what awaited him. He had fought with himself about coming today but eventually the curious side of him had won. Keith wanted to see what Hunk had planned for them and also even if it scared him to admit it…he missed Lance.

Logically he knew that it did not make any sense. They hardly knew each other. But emotionally he just… missed him. He sighed and blinked against the bright sunlight. He lifted his hand to shield his eyes against it and bumped into someone.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to-“

“Don’t sweat it. All good here.” A friendly voice interrupted him. The tall boy in front of him looked him over and tilted his head to the side. „Hey, are you Keith by any chance?”

Keith nodded. “The one and only.”

“Oh, great! I’m Hunk.“ Keith took the big hand he was offered and returned the welcoming smile. When Hunk gestured for them to move out of the sun and stand in the tall building’s shadow Keith followed him thankfully.

“Nice to meet you. Thanks for saving me yesterday by the way.”

“Oh, no problem. Lance can get like that sometimes when he’s stressed. He didn’t mean anything by it. You know… finals and all. He’s a bit on edge around this time of the year.”

“No, I get it. NASA is a big thing, who wouldn’t freak out, right?”

Hunk gave a nervous laugh. “Yah, I guess. So umm, Lance had to pick up our friend Pidge, they should be here-“

“Exactly now.” Lance’s voice interrupted them. He stopped next to Hunk and let Pidge whom he had been carrying just now slip off his back.

“Hey, Keith. This is Pidge. They use they pronouns. I guess you already know Hunk by now.” Lance smiled at him and clapped Hunk on the back.

Keith nodded and raised his hand in greeting at Pidge. Immediately he regretted the awkward gesture and lowered his hand quickly.

“What’s up butter cup.” Pidge replied with a grin completely ignoring Keith’s weird behavior, who in return just raised an eyebrow at their choice of words.

“Lance, why did you carry Pidge here? Did you take ‘pick them up’ literally again?” Hunk asked with his hands on his hips.

“They paid me two dollars.”

Pidge shrugged. “I didn’t want to walk. It’s too early.”

“It’s almost noon, Pidge.” Hunk said while shaking his head but there was a visible smile on his lips.

“Exactly. Way too early.”

“I feel you, Pidge.” Keith threw in. “I had three coffees before I got here.”

Pidge yawned and stretched their arms over their head. “Good thinking. I only had one and I feel dead inside.”

“So, Hunk. What is this thing? Why are we here?” Lance asked and absently patted Pidge’s head while they leaned against him, eyes closed and repeatedly yawning.

“We are here, because today…” Hunk made a dramatic pause, “They are having a lecture about space for family and friends of students and-“

“AHHH STAR CEILING?” Lance interrupted Hunk excited while bouncing up and down, Hunk just smiled and nodded.

“Yep, Star ceiling.”

“What exactly is star ceiling?” Keith asked confused. Judging from Lance’s reaction this had to be the best thing in the entire universe.

“It’s only the best thing ever, dude,” Lance started to explain while taking Keith’s arm and pulling him in the direction of a big building.

“They only do this once or twice a year when they have family day for the freshmen and around finals for the really stressed out students so they don’t go all homicidal and stuff.” They entered the lecture hall and Lance directed them to a row in the back. “It’s basically just a short lecture about space and planets and what we do here at college but at the end they turn off the lights and project stars on the ceiling and walls. Dude…it’s the most beautiful thing ever. It will change you!” He gestured for Keith to sit down in one of the empty seats and sat next to him.

Hunk took the seat on Keith’s other side and Pidge sat next to Lance. It seemed like they were just in time because a man holding a mic entered the small stage. From the corner of his eyes Keith saw Pidge leaning over to Lance and whispering something into his ear. A moment later Lance bent forward so that Hunk and Keith could both hear him.

“Sorry guys, we’re gonna get Pidge more coffee. They are literally about to murder someone. We’ll be back in a minute.” With that they both left the room and Keith was alone with Hunk, which he didn’t mind that much. They had only exchanged a few sentences but Keith already liked the guy.

The man on the stage started talking about the importance of astronomy and explained the different subjects they were teaching. Unfortunately he had a really boring and monotone voice and Keith immediately zoned out. Thank God Hunk was there to keep him entertained.

“I know this stuff isn’t really interesting, especially not when he’s talking,” Hunk pointed in the direction of the stage. “But it’s really worth it. Lance didn’t exaggerate…well maybe a little… but it actually is crazy beautiful.”

“So you three all study astronomy?” Keith asked. This was his opportunity to learn a bit more about Lance and his friends without this nervous feeling he got around his soulmate. Hunk somehow managed to create an atmosphere around him that immediately made Keith feel comfortable.

“Yeah. It was actually Lance who got me into this stuff when we were younger. We met Pidge here on our first day. They are this crazy genius and got into college early. They are only sixteen but way ahead of most of the students here. Turned out they and their brother Matt live in the same building as me and Lance so we hung with them a couple of times and now we’re all basically besties for life.”

“Space nerds unite,” Keith said with a smile.

“Haha, yeah. Basically.”

“So… do you and Pidge wanna get into NASA too or is that only Lance?” Keith checked the stage for a second but the guy was still talking about boring stuff and Keith noticed that a few other people in the audience had started quiet conversations.

“Well Pidge is as good as in, let’s be real. Me… well. Of course NASA is the dream for almost everyone at this university and I would be thrilled… but I’m not as set as Lance if that makes sense. I feel like I could work anywhere as long as I’m close to my friends.” Hunk shrugged and knitted his brows in deep thought before he cleared his throat.

“Lance is working really hard for it though. You have no idea how many scholarships he had to apply for before he finally got a foot in. Didn’t stop him though.” He smiled and Keith could feel how proud he was of his friend. “You know, the first year was rough. He failed an important test two times and was sure they were gonna kick his ass but he studied harder than all of us and now he’s always in the top 5.”

“Wow. That’s really impressive,” Keith heard himself say and immediately wanted to slap himself. Way to sound like a high school fangirl, Kogane. Can we please think before we speak, brain?!

“Yeah it is.” Hunk sighed, unfazed by Keith’s inner distress. “It’s also really hard to watch sometimes though…”

Keith raised an eyebrow at him.

“Not the part where he’s top of the class, no. I mean how he gets there. You can’t imagine how many all-nighters the boy pulls during finals and he always pushes himself to get better. I mean it’s great that he’s improving but sometimes I wish he would allow himself a break.” He stiffened and gave a quick laugh. “I’m talking too much again, aren’t I. Sorry, this must be a weird first impression.”

Keith didn’t say anything for a while and chewed on his lower lip. “Is it really that bad? I mean… I haven’t noticed anything and finals are just around the corner right?” He thought back to the few times he’d seen Lance. He had always looked cheery and well… relaxed.

Hunk seemed to be pondering over his answer for a while. That’s when they heard the door behind them open slowly and Lance and Pidge slipped back into the room, Pidge holding a coffee cup in each hand. Hunk leaned over a bit and whispered just before the other two sat down. “Look at his eyes, he thinks we don’t notice…”

Keith had no idea what he meant by that and was staring at a spot on the floor absently when Lance waved his hand in front of his face to get him out of his trance. “Keith, buddy, my man. They’re about to start, don’t pass out on me now!”

Keith blushed a little and sat up straighter. “Yeah, sorry. Not passing out. Now, let’s see your space magic thing. Hope it’s as good as you made it sound.”

The boy next to him grinned from ear to ear. “Better.”

The crowd around them applauded loudly. Apparently the speech part was over and somebody dimmed the lights, making everyone go silent. It was now completely dark in the hall. Keith could feel his palms getting sweaty. Why was this taking so long? He swallowed hard.

He whispered, almost inaudible “Lance?” but in this exact moment they turned on the projectors and surprised ahhhhs and ohhhs could be heard through the entire room.

Keith threw his head back so quickly he almost hit it on his seat’s backrest.

Lance’s words hadn’t prepared him for what he was seeing now at all. It was truly just… beautiful. Thousands of little stars were dancing on the ceiling and the floor and just everywhere. He knew he was sitting in a boring lecture hall and he felt incredibly stupid for even thinking so but for a moment he really felt like he was in space. His heartbeat sped up and his eyes wander around the entire room so quickly he was almost getting sick.

Keith was trying to take it all in before it stopped. The stars danced around his fingertips as he raised his hand in front of his face and watched. He wasn’t even questioning how the whole thing worked it was just too… too everything. In a good way.

“Sooo, did I promise too much?” Lance suddenly whispered next to his ear.

Keith just shook his head and then turned it to smile at him. “No, you didn’t. This is great! Thanks for inviting me to this.” Lance smiled at him and then quickly turned his head to the ceiling again. Neither of them mentioned that it had actually been Hunk who invited Keith.

Keith was still staring at Lance’s face from the corner of his eyes, watching the stars being projected onto his skin and their reflections in his eyes. He looked so beautiful like this, it made Keith’s head spin. He wanted to say something, to tell Lance how pretty he was but he bit his tongue instead. Just friends he reminded himself.

That’s when he remembered Hunk��s words from earlier and looked at Lance’s eyes more closely. What was he supposed to see? The long eyelashes? The small freckles underneath them? The well blended but thick layer of… concealer? Something clicked in his brain. Hunk had mentioned that Lance wasn’t sleeping enough and pushing too hard. Of course he and many others were unable to tell if they didn’t know what to look for. Lance had covered up his dark circles almost perfectly. Almost… Keith turned his gaze to the ceiling again and frowned. Why was he pretending to be fine? It was normal to be tired around finals wasn’t it? Why was he trying to hide it?

“Ladies and gentlemen, I’m afraid we have to end this now since our time is up,” a voice sounded from the front of the room. “Thank you all for coming and enjoy the rest of your day on campus.” They turned off the projectors and disappointment could be heard all around. Some classical song started to play and people started to shift but the lights were still out. Keith dug his nails into his palm and tried to breathe evenly. It’s fine, he tried to tell himself. They’re gonna turn them back on every second. Only they didn’t.

“Ladies and gentlemen, it appears we’re having some trouble back here. We’re sure everything will be fixed soon,” the voice echoed again. “Always a bit hard to find the light switch in the dark.” The voice said and gave a fake laugh. Some parents laughed as well. Keith didn’t. He gulped and pressed deeper into his seat.

He could feel Lance stir in the dark next to him and a hand touching his shoulder. “Keith? Are you okay?” Before Keith could even think of something to respond with the lights were finally turned back on. Keith let out a very deep breath he hadn’t noticed he was holding until now. He quickly unclenched his hands and turned his head to give Lance a small smile.

“All good, yes. I’m a bit sad it was over so quickly though.”

Lance looked at him questioningly for a second longer before he returned the smile. “Right? I wish they would do this more often!”

The group got up and headed out before the mass of people in the hall could block the aisles. The bright sunlight blinded Keith for a moment when they walked outside and he held up his helmet to shield his eyes. Someone walked into him from behind and he quickly turned around to apologize for stopping in the doorway but it was Lance he was looking at. An elderly woman complained about them being in her way and they stepped aside and walked a few feet to get away from the mass.

“Sorry for bumping into you,” Lance started, “It’s just,” he pointed at the helmet in Keith’s hand. “I didn’t notice before because I was so excited about the star thing but… did you bring your bike?” Hunk listened to their conversation and laughed looking at Lance now. Keith didn’t exactly understand what he thought was so funny and turned to Pidge for help but they were just quietly smiling at the whole scene.

“Ummm, yes? It’s how I got here. I don’t have a car, soo…” Keith shrugged a little lost.

“Awesome! I mean great. I mean...,” Lance scratched his head. “Can I see it?”

“Uhh, sure. I parked right over there.” Keith pointed over his shoulder. Lance didn’t even wait for the others. He was already on his way to the parking lot, almost running. When the others caught up with him he was inspecting Keith’s bike and admiring the details of the machine by almost touching it with his nose.

Hunk and Pidge seemed kind of impressed too and Hunk slapped Keith’s shoulder. “Sweet ride, Keith!” He joined Lance in walking around the bike to get a better look. “Lance mentioned you work at a workshop. Did you build this yourself?”

Keith nodded and then realised that Hunk wasn’t looking at him so he couldn’t see. “Yah, I did. It was the first project I did without Shiro’s help. Took me a while to find all the parts. I could get a better bike if I wanted but I’m kind of sentimental I guess.”

Lance nodded. “No I get it. It’s a bit like it’s your child, right? I mean… you made her.”

Keith smiled. “Yeah. I guess.”

Pidge gave a fake cough to get everyone’s attention and pointed at the bike. “If you’re finished drooling over that can we go get some food please?”

“That?” Keith repeated in a fake hurt tone.

“They’re secretly loving this more than Lance and me. You should see the stuff they build. We should visit you at your shop and just leave Pidge there for a few hours. They’d have the time of their life.” Hunk chuckled at the expression on Pidge’s face after his revelation.

 “Speaking of food though,” Lance looked at Keith and tilted his head, “We thought about grabbing a bite at Planet Altea. You in?”

Keith considered for a moment. He could spend some more time with them and get to know them better. He probably should. Shiro would tell him to… but he also really wanted to go home. The light incident had seriously freaked him out even if he didn’t want to show it. He’d rather calm down at home, alone, where he could stop pretending and no one would see what a mess he really was after such a small thing.

“Sorry, I need to leave. Shiro wants to visit an old friend of his and he’s dragging me along.” Lie. Shiro never dragged him anywhere Keith didn’t want to go. Apart of from that Shiro wasn’t even home right now.

Lance chewed his lower lip. “Ohh. Okay. We’ll text then?” The disappointed look on his face made Keith feel bad instantly.

“Yes definitely. It was really great. Thank you all for taking me.” Let me leave let me go.

Pidge and Hunk said goodbye and they watched Keith take off quickly. Lance waved one last time before he was out of sight, but Keith didn’t turn around to see it.

 Usually driving calmed him down but he felt himself get more anxious with every mile. He was glad he could finally take off the helmet when he arrived at his and Shiro’s place because he could breathe more freely instantly. He put the bike in the garage, unlocked the front door and took the elevator up to their floor. After hastily unlocking the front door and locking it after himself again, he immediately kicked off his boots and headed for his bedroom.  

He’d learned a few breathing techniques during his never ending counseling sessions and was really glad about that right now. After some minutes of leaning against his door he got his breathing under control. His thoughts however where still spinning, so he put his favourite playlist on shuffle and flopped down on his bed.

After a couple of songs Keith took out his phone to ask Shiro when he would be home and noticed he had gotten a few messages.

 (2:17pm): Hey, u ok?

(2:18pm): Getting kind of an anxious vibe over here?!

(2:20): Also thats an awful lot of emo music for someone who insists hes not emo ;)

 Shit. Sometimes he forgot the soulmate connection was a thing.

 (2:33pm): Sorry! Yes I’m good

There was an immediate response.

(2:33pm): U sure? Doesnt feel like it

(2:35pm): Idk

(2:36pm): Maybe not

(2:36pm): do you wanna talk? I can call u

Keith’s whole body tensed. Was he ready for that? Should he lie, maybe say he was tired and wanted to nap or something? Should he tell the truth? He frowned.

(2:37pm): I’m not… good at phone calls

(2:37pm): Np u can just listen and I’ll do the talkin

(2:39pm): that’d be ok?

Keith swallowed. Shiro probably wouldn’t be home for a while and he really needed to talk to someone. The question was if Lance was safe to talk to? Would it overstep the friendship line? Why could things never be easy…

 (2:42pm): yes, ok

 [Incoming call: Lance McClain]

More author’s notes:

This fic on AO3

Yeah after 500 years I finally updated. I could explain at length why it took my so long but it comes down to this: I was stressed, I was depressed, I’m sorry but now it’s finally here! Hooray!

As always a big THANK YOU to @alteanmoonchild for being my beta and for reading every new draft and honestly telling me when what I wrote isn’t good so I can improve and grow. I love us working together on this <3

Thank you to all of you for reading! If you have any questions or feedback send me an ask or dm me <3

Me an my friends finally cosplayed Voltron so if you wanna see me as Shiro and my awesome friends as Keith, Lance and Coran head over to my instagram.

Do you know what keeps me motivated when I so often doubt my writing and don’t know how to continue? Getting feedback! So please reblog, like, comment or even draw fanart. Whenever I read an “I love this” comment it makes me incredible happy! Also one of my goals is to someday have someone draw fanart for something wrote soo... if you wanna do that I’ll love you. Also please tag me if you do.

If you want me to tag you in the next part when I post it, just send me an ask saying so and I’ll add you to the taglist.

taglist: @alyy--caticus @princealektheorange @an-important-nobody @teddyorionpotter @spookyscaryshitstorm @ladythugs @positevelybakerstreet @meganmoo02 @atomicengineerdetective @jishwadun-is-jishwafun @anemoee

[littlebabycrybtch]

ok ik bitches are still going to complain but i gotta rant to keep my shit together;;; ngl after being stuck co-raising two babies now i really feel genuinely Disgusted by unnecessary parent critique. like it actually makes me feel so viscerally upset and depressed when i remember nobody gets this or cares to and probably just wants to call out what im doing wrong, instead of lend me a hand to do it better. man im not treading lightly here the ‘no excuses’ mentality is literally Inhumane to parents and dehumanizes them as these superhumans, they arent, they are people trying to take care of themselves Plus One. there Are ‘excuses’ for not being perfect. just bc every child deserves perfect doesnt mean it can be given and that fucking SUCKS but that is one of the only times im comfortable saying; ‘thats just life’. you cant magically make life better for kids the way you think, you’re not a protector, you’re their Rock to teach them How to DEAL with what life brings, that means you’re allowed to struggle with it too. childcare is like this cosmic design to work you physically and mentally to the brink, fucking forget the normalization of how many people you think you’ve seen raise kids and done fine, it is harder than you can even fathom. they probably did not do fine behind closed doors. the parents with the best behaved and most obedient kids probably did harmful things to make them that way that will eventually come back to them, the parents with the happiest most well adjusted kids probably had the money to provide the extra care for that. there are ‘excuses’. idc if it fucking annoys you or w/e, i dont like being the bitch that says stuff nobody wants to hear, but you truly deeply cannot 100% understand unless you are raising kids, i dont say that to hurt your feewings or exclude you, i used to think that way, i say it bc when you see me passed out on the couch while my nephew gets into something dangerous, its because i got one hour of sleep that night while he kicked me in our bed for 4 hours. he cant help not knowing how that affects both of us, but i cant help being affected by it just cuz im supposed to be ~the big strong adult~, bc i am not a fucking xman. i CANT pretend it all away. while im sitting there napping im also waiting for my mental health meds to start working. im also dizzy from not eating. it sucks that he gets into shit sometimes. hes still gonna get into shit sometimes, and i can do my best, but if i sit here worrying that karens are gonna get pissed abt that and work myself even harder im gonna straight up explode. who does that help. who does me falling apart help. come babysit my kid for free if you wanna help me bitch!

parents are doing twice the work of a normal person while also teaching one of these people theyre caring for, how to BE a person. i used to be SO pro judging parents and im literally nauseated by the judgments now. “i cant believe this parent looked away and their kid got hurt, i cant beleive they just leave them there with a tablet or a snack or a toy while they nap, i cant believe they let them do that, i cant believe--” btich you literally have no idea how lucky you are that they are not both already dead. you are so lucky tehy are both alive and the parent isnt hospitalized for mental health or even physical exhaustion, or addicted to a stimulant (which includes caffeine), or using smth to relax like weed or alcohol (hello wine mom culture), or the kid isnt traumatized from watching their parent have repeatd breakdowns. that is literally better than most situations already. no matter how impossibly perfect the family could be in your mind, kids fuckin get hurt and they make mistakes and the PARENTS make mistakes bc theyre PEOPLE and yall this blows my mind that ppl dont realize this but,,,,, Little kids??? THEY DO NOT LISTEN TO THEIR PARENTS bc they essentially CANT..... for like YEARS there is a period they WILL NOT LISTEN TO YOU at ALL while they have the full autonomy and smarts and strength to cause horrible consequential problems, they are capable of learning how to circumnavigate your ‘babyproofing’ in new ways every single day, but they have ZEROOOOO MORALS OR CAUSE AND EFFECT SKILLS to understand RIGHT FROM WRONG, NO MATTER HOW OFTEN YOU TELL THEM!!!!! IT WONT CHANGE, ITS LITERALLY A PHYSICAL BRAIN THING THAT THEY CANT LEARN WHAT ‘NO’ MEANS FOR A WHILE YET!!! THIS CAN LAST FROM AGE 1 TO 4, SOMETIMES LONGER! THATS GENUINELY INSANITY INDUCING FOR THE ADULT WHOS KEEPING THEM IN LINE HUNDREDS OF TIMES A DAY, KNOWING ITS AMOUNTING TO ALMOST NOTHING UNTIL YEARS LATER!!!! IT DOESNT HELP WHEN PPL JUDGE YOU AND DONT BELEIVE YOU AND THINK YOU JUST ARENT ~TRYING HARD ENOUGH~! holy FUCK dude, idc if you wanna judge, im losing it bc i am being forced to keep my cool while a child whos pinching me and genuinely HURTING and BRUISING me laughs in my face bc he truly DOES NOT KNOW this, and there is NO WAY for me to convey it to make him stop at the moment!!!! thats maddening!!!

listen to me, neither of you dying or experiencing lasting damage is literally the goal every day, not just ‘raising them’, but that you both survive to the end of it. im appalled by how different the lifestyle is and the way ppl just... dont know that/REJECT that information so they get to judge. ofc tiny vulnerable innocent kids deserve the best, parents cannot always provide that if they want to Survive, bc they also deserve , basic understanding and humanity. you call out abuse all you want, theres a difference between the 'lesser of two evils’ choices, or even the genuinely Bad choices you can Accidentally make when at your wits end (which you should immediately correct anyways), and ever causing intentional physical or mental harm to the child, but the secodn yall start nitpicking or blatantly being ignorant to a struggle just so you get your blame validation in i literally cannot AFFORD to give you the time of day, im busy running on minutes of sleep, so if you think i have enough free time to entertain ur whining that my kids got a messy face and has been on his tablet in a highchair for an hour or w/e, idc, im using that time to shower for the first time in 2 weeks bc nobody else is gonna be there for me to let me do that shit :) so frankly put your money where your mouth is and help struggling parents whenever you can. i cant make shit better out of thin air.

“oh, but i dont have the money to help you.” YOU THINK IM AFFORDING CHILDCARE?? YOU CAN COME OVER AND HELP DIRECTLY WHILE I DO CHORES. “oh, but i dont wanna babysit for my friends, i dont like kids.” OH REALLY?????? OH YOU DONT LIKE KIDS??? BC THEYRE DIFFICULT MAYBE ??? SO MAYBE YOU SHOULDNT JUDGE WHEN ITS HARD THEN????? LIKE YOU RLY THINK JUST ‘LIKING THEM’ SUDDENLY MAKES IT EASY FOR ME?? YOU THINK ME FINDING MY NEPHEW CUTE AND LOVING HIM AND HIS LAUGHTER GIVES ME FUCKING SUPERMAN POWERS TO DEAL WITH THIS???????? “but You chose to have kids” rt in my case i literally didnt and would be homeless if not offering to help care for them but HEY COOL CONCEPT PRO CHOICE KINDA FUCKIN INCLUDES WHEN PEOPLE ‘CHOOSE’ TO HAVE KIDS EVEN WHEN THEY STRUGGLE AFTER, TOO LATE TO FUCKIN COMPLAIN NOW, JUST HELP A BITCH OUT. LIke... bro BRO b R O im losing it stop giving parents the inspiration porn treatment while disrespecting the actual struggles they go thru any time the child actually suffers bc they are unable to shield them from their struggle. can i be real, life literally will not go without struggle. you cannot raise them to have a life better than what the world is, you can do your best but you really cant MAKE it fair. once again this is not a ‘raise the perfect child’ contest you are just . trying to raise them at all. its messy. every single day you will have successes and failures, and you’ll be running on empty, and you’ll be doing that just to make it through to do it again tomorrow, while it slowly (AGONIZINGLY SLOWLY) gets easier each day. im tired of pretending lmao i dont wanna hear you bitches judge parents anymore, i dont wanna hear the stupid ass ‘im allowed to’ shit anymore dude!!!!! for gods sake i can agree with you when some shits just plain wrong but ill never apologize for standing up for myself or other struggling parents even if it makes you uncomfy, i can care about Both the child and the parent at the same time, ig i wont ask you why you seemingly cant. 😶 ESPECIALLY when things like classism and ableism tie in so often with these situations. not to mention racism like im white but hoooo if i hear one more story about a black parents ‘negligence’ in efforts of just trying to help their family, like leaving their kids somewhere during a job interview or w/e, vs the white parents that LET THEIR 10 YR OLDS WANDER AROUND MALLS BY THEMSELVES... im gonna scream. im gonna fuckin scream. its so unfair. fuck off, stop the spiteful ignorance, change this shitty hateful culture.

tldr; you Can care about kids while respecting parents, even when they arent perfect. you can advocate for children while also advocating for parents, and in fact, you should fucking try.

[theday]

anyways, ill say bye now... i hope ure well rested and have a good day!! (wait, i remember what i wanted to ask!! at least i think this is what i wanted to ask? anywys, do u know what u want to do now that ure finished w school? if u dont mind me asking, of course, i understand if u think its a bit personal!) ok, now im done, have a good day!! take care and stay hydrated!! (and now i really did send u a bunch of asks..)

omg i hope u dont mind but ill be answering the stuff from ur last ask here (the one where i… deleted everything) under cut bc itll be 2x longer now

so first !!!!! how i got into kpop!!! it was thanks to my good pal (@.briwoon) boxy! i follow her on twitter and despite her being a day6 stan twt i had her unmuted anyway bc.. after years of being an anime blog on tumblr and seeing all my anime mutuals slowly converting into kpop blogs one by one i was able to filter the kpop out of my brain?? smth like that since back then i wasnt into kpop and i didnt want to unfollow since im mutuals with most of them :-0 

another backstory - i was one of those people who never saw themselves getting into kpop? and i think the main reason was bc i thought liking kpop would make u seem lame?? due to the influence from people around me?? but as years went by and as my mutuals changed interests it stopped bothering me and that mindset kind of just? faded away bc who am i to call other people’s happiness bad?? but despite being okay with it i never really made the move to get into any groups lmao that was until i got tired of my interest at that time (seiyuu, japanese voice actors) and my interests would always. not last?? idk so maybe thats why i didnt want to get invested but it happened regardless 

anyway usually i wouldnt take notice of her rts but this . this beautiful man with orange hair and minion glasses caught my eye when i was scrolling through my timeline and i was like o worm? oh mu god? hes beautiful? so i slid into her dms and asked her whomst the beautiful man was and she sent me all their mvs after that from congratulations to i smile (the most recent mv at that time, late june) for me to watch :-D now at that time, from what little knowledge i had of kpop.. i understood that groups would be singing and dancing so i was prepared to see some sick moves or smth?? but then. i clicked on miss i smile and my wig flew off? bc… wtf.? they were playing instruments???? and they sounded good ??? so i was like oh my god? a band??????

before day6 i also had (have) a preference for bands and the way their music sounds so i was like?? ready to just. get on board yknow?? i watched how can i say and i saw the lanky noodle wearing glasses and i was like o fuck mu life? i caved and asked boxy for their names and other information and best decision of my life bc.. they really make me happy!!! after that like the day after ? myabe they did a vlive and i was like o shit? what do i do… so i downloaded the vapp and wowie i love it? its my second home…… i watched every vlive they had at that time and i thought that was a lot… (it isnt, compared to mx) and i was just rly content??

(ok i know u asked for kpop and not … day6 or other groups bc im gonna talk abt how i got into mx and astro too bc…… how can i Not.. u can skip this part tho i just wanna ramble abt my loves? ill tell u when u can continue)

that was peak happiness for me at that time.. until… boxy started talking about monsta x in our groupchat (with @.tokayhk) and she would just ramble abt this kihyun fella (who i vaguely knew bc my real life friend likes him and mx and i bought her his pc before along with the guilty clan part 2) so i was like hmm interesting… and honestly? i wasnt going to get into monsta x i really wasnt planning on asking her abt them (since i was scared id lose interest in day6 right after) but then.. she started linking videos and i .. my resolve crumbled down as i heard monsta x yelling and … this beautiful cover (which boxy sent to show us how powerful kihyuns vocals are but i was 2 focused on mister aka minhyukku) and she told us how funny these monsta men are and i was like o h no…………….. eventually one day in late august i asked her to tell me more about these monstas…… aftert that i watched every mxray episode (starting from season 2 bc i dont know 1 comes before 2) and even though i didnt know anyone who was on screen except jooheon i found it really funny and?? it made me laugh so much i love mx?? ya… boxys kind of like my guardian angel?? shes really the reason im living tbh… introducing me to all these lovely people?? thank u miss boxy i love u

now. for the astrosus….. they were a bit different.. because i didnt have boxys help and they were the first group i took interest in solely bymyself so i knew i was in for a wild ride (at first, i couldnt even differentiate brian from sungjin in day6 lmao) after stanning monsta x and day6 i became more?? open to kpop and i started watching unhelpful guides on youtube bc . they were funnie and idk its nice??/ and i stumbled upon the astro one (which wasnt that funny but more helpful than anythng) and i was like. oh worm? the cicada group… bc i watched a short clip of them catching that stupid cicada in their office as it appeared on my tl one day so i clicked on the video ..and after watching that it led me to another video of astro being extra for 6 minutes and those six minutes/????? best six minutes of my life because theyre so fnny and they made me laugh a lot? (combined with the editing from op) so bc they were funnie i decided to look them up and read their profiles/??? i watched their nimdle video and only knew mj bc his tag was the two letters m and j lol but it really made me bust both of my lungs i just?? laughed A Lot 

im not sure how i managed to put name to face so quickly but it mightve been bc after the nimdle videos i watched every ddoca and astro play as well as their vlives available bc..  i just inhale the content at godspeed?? 

for mx and astro i was drawn in by their personalities before their music because they were on more variety shows and had more chances to show dorky they all are which made it way quicker for me to fall for the two groups??? for day6 its a bit sad but the weekly scheduled vlives arent enough for me to tell what kind of people they are (although those r still hilarious) i just wish they would go on more variety shows?? its understandable if they themselves dont want to be on any shows though!!! i love all 3 groups with all my heart :-D 

ok if u skipped u can start from here ill be answering the questions now lmao

FIRSTof all,,,,, youre learning how to drive?? thats so cool >:-0 we’re not allowed to learn until we’re like...?? 18?? or 21 idk but not so Soon :-( and its cute u think abt me (or of what to say) but pleaseth stay safe... i hope ur driving lessons go smoothly until u end theM!!! hopefully youll be able to get ur licence :-D 

aNDD!!! the thought of drinking warm tea when its cold outside.. is so ?? nice to think about hecc u better drink that tEA and enjoy it !!!! stay warm and comfy miss RM ..... and it even snows there????? thats so cool tbh ?? (i love snow but maybe thats bc it doesnt snow here so i dont know the tru evil of snow but like.... its so.... white and fluffy??) i would ask u 2 take pics and show me but alas...... the time is not right :-( do u know when we’re allowed to expose ourselves?? i forgot rip... but its sometime next month right im excited???? since its near my birthday !!!!! 

ok now to answer this ask no i actually have no clue what i want to be after i finish school?? yikEs but last year i (jokingly) said i wanted to be a farmer??? idk if i might actually do that probably not i guess im just freestyling (going with the flow) for now we’ll see where life takes me 

and like i said u can ask me anything !!! im fine with it :-) alsooooo please dont ever feel bad about sending too many asks bc its a lovely thing to wake up to and i just?? get rly happy when i see all the asks in my activity :-D!!