#which is one of the last remaining rewards for company loyalty I guess

[tozettastone]

I'm so excited, I have taken like 6 weeks of leave between now and next year. 2 weeks are company-mandated over Christmas but I am also burning some of my long service leave to just fuck right off for an entire month.

Am I excited about being able to go somewhere or do something specific? No! Am I excited to get out of the office? God yes.

[ask-prime-starscream]

Okay, so hear me out. How about I change that certain movie a bit? Let’s start right when Unicron-Megatron arrives at the field with the Predacon bones and Starscream gets an orgasm thinking his beloved abuser master is back.

I feel so bad for Starscream. He thinks everything is going to be okay again. Megatron is his protector after all. The only one who bothers to keep him around. What’s getting punched in the face and getting ridiculed from time to time when you aren’t left for dead? At least to Starscream it’s a good deal because he is used to abuse. Sometimes I think about a scene where Unicron not only punches Starscream, but threatens to kill him. If Megatron actually had a slither of fondness for Starscream or at least remembered what a total wild card he can be in the grand scheme of things, he could have tried his mind tricks on Unicron like he did with Predaking before.  I don’t know. Just to humanize him a bit. Think more of Starscream than that he suffers entertainingly. Buuut, let’s keep it as canon as we can. Scrap that scene. Let’s focus on things that actually could and should have happened!

When Unicron revives the Predacons, Starscream flees and Shockwave stays back because he is a slow inferior ground vehicle. Well, remember that Starscream pays back his debts? Remember that Shockwave grabbed Starscream at the end of season 3 and probably saved him from imprisonment or death? (I highly doubt the Autobots would have killed Starscream if he had had the chance to “avenge Megatron”, but Starscream just expects the worst from everyone, so...)  Since a horde of zombies is scary either way, Starscream flees at first, but then he decides to help Shockwave, the bot that kept him company and was his comrade after Megatron’s demise. Shockwave is about to be overpowered, but a few missiles give him some room to move again. Zombiecons really are not much better than Vehicons, Predacons or not. Megatron revived a whole army and Optimus and Ratchet had little problem slicing and dicing them all back in season 1. Dark energon is really overrated. It’s worthless actually. Megatron is a fool.

Anyway, as a nice quote from G1 which we know TF series can’t get enough of, Shockwave climbs on Starscream’s vehicle mode and together they can escape. We know Starscream is strong enough to carry Shockwave. He had no problem flying Knock Out around. Shockwave probably thinks that Starscream’s dangerous move was illogical, but Starscream just tells him to shut up.

What happens next? They try to free Knock Out and the Vehicons of course. The more the merrier. With Shockwave around, Knock Out thinks twice about who is gonna be the winning team here and doesn’t stab Starscream in the back over some petty thing. A petty thing I would call the emergency brake writers pull when A: Starscream gets a friend. Or B: Two male characters get some really nice chemistry.

I personally have no problem with Knock Out basically being a spineless Starscream who believes in nothing but his looks. What I have a problem with is the way he is treated. He is fucking dangerous and came pretty close to killing some members of team Prime. However, “No Autobot except Cliffjumper dies in this series by Decepticon hand” syndrome prevented that. He doesn’t believe in any of the Autobots’s morals. He doesn’t care if humanity gets wiped out. He has no honor, no loyalty. He contributes absolutely nothing in the fight against Unicron. The Autobots shouldn’t have treated him like a longtime member of team Prime. He shouldn’t have gotten away scot-free at the end of the movie as if he was actually good! It’s so unsatisfying and completely unearned! Breakdown, Starscream, even Dreadwing would have been better candidates for the turncoat. But nah, fuck actual character, Knock Out is cute and funny! He shall be good now! WRONG! Knock Out is a chicken shit opportunist, who will follow the faction in power. He would have submitted to Unicron if Unicron wasn’t about complete annihilation. Something like that shouldn’t be rewarded. If RiD did one thing right, it was showing Knock Out to be uncaring about Autobot stuff and just racing around on earth. So. Phew. Rant over. We will have none of that shit here. Decepticons and Autobots are at a standoff. And Bee won’t pull his dumb “Do you believe me or your own eyes?” shit either. Instead we do something else.

Arcee knows that Starscream follows somewhat of an honor code. He had saved her from Airachnid and spared her life. So she tries to actually bargain with him. While the other Autobots are more like “The heck are you trying here, Arcee?”, she starts talking about whether Starscream really wants to abandon Cybertron and lose it to destruction, this time irreversible. After all, he had put so much effort in reviving it, getting the keys and all. Bee maybe catches on and strokes his ego and Starscream is like “Whoah, what you guys say isn’t even that wrong...!” Shockwave is skeptical, Knock Out just wants to be safe, but everyone comes to the conclusion that together, Autobots and Decepticons, they might have a chance. And so they do their all to fight for their home. And with “do their all” I mean it. They use everything. The Autobots free Soundwave from the shadow zone and if there is one good thing about Soundwave, it’s that he follows Starscream’s orders. Without Megatron, Starscream is the leader of the Decepticons, just like he had been in season 1. Also the prospect of beating Unicron out of Megatron’s body might motivate him too.

So they fly with the Nemesis to Primus’s anus and get battle ready. 

In order to give the Zombiecons the smallest attack surface, they position themselves accordingly. Every Iaconic artifact gets used. Immobilizer, phaseshifter, shield... the Nemesis’s cannons... It’s a crazy fight and everybody is contributing. And then Starscream says “I would have never thought I’d die side by side with a grounder” to Knock Out and Knock Out responds with “How about side by side with a friend?” and... Maybe we even get some nice Autobot/Decepticon teamwork. Some really nice, fanservice-y shit. But the battle is hard and even with the Predacons joining them, they are about to be overwhelmed...

Until Prime and Wheeljack show up. Unicron finally enters the battle himself and Optimus and him start an epic fight surrounded by Autobots, Decepticons, Predacons and zombies. It seems like Prime will actually win and the morale is high. Until Unicron throws him to the ground and stabs him, Megatron screaming in his head. That’s not how Megatron had intended for their eon-long fight to end. He is overcome by guilt and regret. After all, his tinkering with Unicron’s blood had caused this outcome. Him, being nothing but a puppet, killing the one he once called his friend. 

The Autobots are devastated and unbelieving. The Decepticons are more like “Oh no, I guess...” Then Bee pulls his leader potential out of his aft since it’s time not for gods and Primes to define destiny, but for the average man! He quickly advises everyone to focus on Unicron and keep him occupied, never letting him target just one and overwhelm them, but having an advantage thanks to their quantity. Wheeljack holds Primus’s spark box like a hot potato asking what to do with it now and Bee says, they’ll get it where it belongs. So all of our good flyers are supposed to get the box to the core. Predaking, Skylynx, Darksteel, Soundwave, Starscream eye each other like “Is that a good idea?”, but there is no better plan. One of them holds the box while the others flank him, protecting him from any potential Zombiecons slipping through the now far weaker protection of the remaining bots. Unicron becomes aware of what is happening and follows them. With his super ultra speed he quickly catches up and the flyers have to throw the box from one to the other in order to get it out of Unicrons reach. Once more they show how important camaraderie, teamwork and friendship is... eh... even if all the flyers are Decepticons and Predacons, lol... Like... Like this is a GOOD moral, okay?! Different species working together, even though they were evil or kinda evil... there is worth in life, even if said life wasn’t always pure.

Eventually, one of them opens the box and throws it in a last ditch effort towards the core, reviving Primus. The sparks burst towards the sky and Unicron’s spirit is ripped from Megatron’s body, carried to who knows where... whatever Primus deems right.

Now, everything is good, isn’t it? Well, not for Megatron. He doesn’t have a place on the new Cybertron and chooses the exile. But Starscream is having nothing of that. Cybertron is theirs to take now, isn’t it? The Decepticons agree and Bee and the Autobots are like “Really?!?”, while the Predacons are like “Whatever... don’t try shit with us, though.”

Megatron is absolutely against any more carnage and says the war had been a mistake. Starscream can’t believe what he is hearing. Everything he ever did, was for nothing? All the losses? All the beatings? He tries to convince Megatron and tells him what he had done in his name. Cloned more Predacons, tried to avenge him. He is loyal for fuck’s sake!! He is like Megatron has always wanted him to be! Now that is all wrong and he had suffered uselessly?

Megatron just says, that Starscream had wasted his time. Then he wants to fly off, but Starscream holds him back, grabbing his arm. How can Megatron leave him now?! Megatron pushes him away and hurts his wing so he won’t get any ideas of following him before he transforms and flies away. 

Starscream is devastated. He has a breakdown. He reaches for his hurt wing and Knock Out is the first by his side, hearing him cry: “I can’t be alone again!” Knock Out shakes his head, smiling faintly. “But you have us.” Indeed. Even Soundwave was just disillusioned by Megatron’s sudden antics. There is no use following such a coward.

Autobots and Decepticons form a shaky peace agreement for now, everyone having to deal with the losses of their leaders and their almost destruction. The tone is somber, but Cybertron lives again. It is time for a new beginning...

[wrestlingisfake]

NXT 2.0 Fake Rankings

The last time I went through the NXT roster was right after the August 6 cuts, which heralded the end of Triple H's super-indy vesion of NXT and the rise of NXT 2.0. Since then another 15 performers left this brand, either to move up to Raw/Smackdown or in the November 4 cuts.

NXT 2.0 officially began on September 14. Two months later, the 18-49 demo is at a record low, and the median age viewer is 62 years old. The shakeup can only be considered a success in terms of one metric--the brand is now more directly focused on developing wrestlers to be what Vince McMahon wants to call up to Raw or Smackdown Whether that's worth it remains to be seen.

Men's singles division - babyfaces

Tommaso Ciampa (NXT men's champion)

Bron Breakker

Johnny Gargano

Dexter Lumis

Cameron Grimes

Odyssey Jones

Solo Sikoa

Grayson Waller

Xyon Quinn

Boa

Men's singles division - heels

Pete Dunne

Carmelo Hayes (NXT North American champion)

Roderick Strong (NXT cruiserweight champion)

Tony D'Angelo

LA Knight

Joe Gacy

Andre Chase

Trick Williams

Duke Hudson*

Unranked: Draco Anthony*, Edris Enofe*, Malik Blade*, Ru Feng*

*Not listed on WWE.com's official NXT roster

One improvement in NXT 2.0 is that I can actually come up with 10 faces and 10 heels to rank in the men's singles division. (It's only 19 here because Santos Escobar disappeared for a while, but he just came back.) Instead of just pushing 4-6 "real" stars and treating everyone else like losers, we've got some actual depth. For instance, it's easy to see the wide gap between Carmelo Hayes and Trick Williams, as opposed to Shinsuke Nakamura and Rick Boogs (who have a similar partnership but fewer guys between them in the pecking order).

The elder statesmen of this brand now are Ciampa, Gargano, Dunne, Strong, and Kyle O'Reilly. Those are the guys that best exemplify the "What if WWE bought Ring of Honor?" era of NXT, and their futures will be very interesting to follow. Gargano and O'Reilly have contracts expiring in December, and there's a lot of buzz about whether they'll jump to AEW. Dunne recently signed on for another few years, which surprised me, but I guess we'll see if he's rewarded for his loyalty.

Men's tag team division - babyfaces

MSK - Nash Carter & Wes Lee*

Kyle O'Reilly & Von Wagner

Jacket Time - Ikemen Jiro & Kushida

Brooks Jensen & Josh Briggs

Men's tag team division - heels

Fabian Aichner & Marcel Barthel (NXT men's tag team champions)

Raul Mendoza & Joaquin Wilde

Brutus Creed & Julius Creed

Grizzled Young Veterans - Zack Gibson & James Drake

*Not listed on WWE.com's official NXT roster

WWE has recently gotten their act together about keeping the website roster up to date, which certainly makes it easier on someone like me. One weird oversight, though, which I only recently noticed, is that Wes Lee isn't included in the NXT roster for some reason. I'm sure it's a mistake, but I am kinda curious how long it will take for them to catch it.

It's difficult for me to believe that O'Reilly and Kushida will have any lasting value with the company beyond helping Wagner and Jiro get started. I don't see either team lasting very long. I'm also not bullish on Gibson and Drake, whose big story this week was that they swiped the women's tag belts to pose with because they wanted to pretend they'd won the men's tag title.

Women's singles division - babyfaces

Raquel Gonzalez

Io Shirai

Sarray

Cora Jade

Women's singles division - heels

Mandy Rose (NXT women's champion)

Dakota Kai

Elektra Lopez

Kay Lee Ray

Unranked: Amari Miller, Erica Yan*, Gabby Stephens, Jenna Levy*, Valentina Feroz*, Yulisa Leon*

*Not listed on WWE.com's official NXT roster

The new mandate for NXT is to recruit younger and younger talent, and to avoid long-term commitments on anybody that isn't developing quickly enough. So the window to start with the company is shrinking, and so is the window to convince them you have what it takes. And it'll be worse for the women, because the age limits are said to be even lower for them. I would expect a lot of turnover in this division.

The big direction for NXT 2.0 is Toxic Attraction (Mandy Rose, Gigi Dolin, and Jacy Jayne), with the idea that they're incredibly evil about being incredibly hot. Which is the same gimmick Carmella has, and that Eva Marie had until she got cut. I don't know how you can do this same gimmick with five different women in the same company and not figure out that it isn't working.

They're doing an eight-woman WarGames match for December 5, with Rose & Dolin & Jayne & Kai vs. Gonzalez & Shirai & Jade & TBA. With Zoey Stark on the shelf there aren't a lot of women left to put in that last spot unless you dip into the jobbers. So this might be a way to see who they're looking to push next.

Women's tag team division - babyfaces

Kayden Carter & Kacy Catanzaro

Indi Hartwell & Persia Pirotta*

Women's tag team division - heels

Gigi Dolin & Jacy Jayne (NXT women's tag team champions)

*Not listed on WWE.com's official NXT roster

Zoey Stark's injury has put her team with Io Shirai on hold, so NXT only has three women's teams left. Astonishingly, that's still more active women's tag teams than Raw and Smackdown put together.

No TV matches in 30 days: Danny Burch, Dante Chen, Guru Raaj, Hachiman, Ivy Nile, Mei Ying, Santos Escobar, Timothy Thatcher

I don't want to do the whole "I bet somebody gets cut next" bit, but I am genuinely surprised Burch and Thatcher made it through the August 6 and November 4 releases. Hachiman is also a weird case, where he was introduced as sort of an enforcer-looking guy for Roderick Strong's Diamond Mine stable, and he still hasn't had a single NXT match yet.

Another oddity of WWE's website is that Guru Raaj is only listed on the 205 Live roster, which is really just a remnant of when 205 Live was treated as a fourth brand for cruiserweights. Not that it makes much difference, since he hasn't been on any WWE show in months.

Part-time/semi-retired: Beth Phoenix, Brian Kendrick, Robert Stone

I'm starting to give up on Kendrick ever returning to full-time action. He hasn't appeared in a match in over a year, which I remember because it was his return from being away for a whole other year. I assume he's taken a producer job or something, and WWE just can't be arsed to update his website profile.

Robert Stone is a weird case because he was a full-time wrestler before he came to NXT, but they stuck him in a manager role, and now everyone in the Robert Stone Brand has been cut except for him. So I guess they'll repackage him as a full-time wrestler, but if there was any future for him in WWE doing that, they wouldn't have made him a manager in the first place.

Inactive

Candice LeRae (pregnancy)

Samoa Joe (undisclosed injury)

Saurav (visa issues)

Zoey Stark (left knee - torn ACL and meniscus)

To my knowledge, WWE has never provided an update on Joe's status or given any indication that they'll pick up on him trying to regain the NXT men's title after being forced to relinquish it. I'm not sure if Saurav will ever make it back into a WWE ring at this rate. I don't think anybody knows when LeRae's contract is up, but since Gargano could be leaving in December, there's been a lot of unfounded speculation that she'll end up wherever he goes.

I haven't seen a timeframe for Stark's recovery, but with knee injuries you can usually figure it'll be somewhere in the 6-12-month range.

[jovialyouthmusic]

Silver Service

We return to the hospital to monitor Anton’s condition, and Olivia visits Lucretia again. Liam makes Olivia an offer.

Word count 3542

A/N One of my characters tried to bail out while I was writing this, but I managed to bring her back. Odd how characters take over. No warnings, though it is a little dark - poisoning, threats, implied death of a character.

21 If only it were all simple.

‘Hello husband. You’ve been asking to see me, so here I am. Am I not worth a glance? A word?’ Anton struggled to open his eyes. He knew that voice – whose was it? He felt as if a ton weight sat on his chest, and his head was filled with a thick fog.

‘You had the gall to uphold the outdated concept of an arranged marriage. Even when you knew I wouldn’t honour it, you continued to expect me to capitulate. But Nevrakis never give in. You never had a chance of me being your wife or your Queen.’ It meant nothing to him. Nevrakis? Who was that? Queen? He fought harder. If only he could open his eyes he might be able to speak. If he could speak, maybe he could move…

‘Know this, Anton. Liam is ten times the man you are, and he and I will secure the future of Cordonia. I carry his heir, and I will never be yours. I’ll fight that to the last breath in my body, and Liam will stay by my side, whether he is King or not’

Fight to the last breath?

If you can breathe, you can stand, and if you can stand, you can fight.

The words echoed around his head as the mist cleared, and he drew all his strength together. Everything came flooding back to him.

She carried Liam’s child? When she was supposed to be his, promised to him from childhood – his bride who would rule Cordonia by his side. He forced his eyes open at last, taking in the sight of his betrothed sitting beside him, and with a superhuman effort his hand shot out and he gripped her wrist. He was rewarded by the look of astonishment and alarm in her eyes.

Then that bastard spawn of the usurper Constantine ruined it all, snatching her arm away from him. Something was happening in his chest – squeezing, crushing pain. He fought for breath as Liam and Olivia were pushed away by medical staff.

Was this a heart attack? Why did his head hurt too, throbbing with his heartbeat? He was in the right place, that was certain. This was a hospital, and he was surrounded by doctors. His arm went into spasm, followed by his whole body tensing and stiffening for a moment before going limp, and something happened in his head, something hot which spread outward. He couldn’t move – nothing – not his arms, his legs, his hands, he could not speak or swallow or breathe. The pain increased and terror gripped him. His eyes were the only thing that obeyed his will, and they widened and fixed on one of the doctors, pleading. He seemed to float above his body, looking down  as he watched the medics tending to him – able to feel everything, see everything, hear everything – but he could do nothing, make no sound, no movement… then everything went black.

------

Bastien sat beside Anton’s bed. He was as he had been before the King’s visit – alive but not conscious. The difference was that he had suffered a massive heart attack and some strange seizure after which he had to be intubated so he could breathe.

Lucretia had refused to elaborate on the nature of the poison that had been mixed in with the mussel extract that triggered Anton’s allergic reaction. All they knew was that it was a rare Lythican herb whose effects were subsequently unknown.

The swelling on Anton’s brain had subsided, but a head scan had revealed that a clot had migrated there from the one that caused his heart attack, depriving certain areas of oxygen despite his constant monitoring. Only a specialist could even guess at the results of that deprivation, but it was highly unlikely that Anton would recover and be the man he had been before.

Grimly, Bastien surveyed Anton’s features, again slack and unresponsive. If he never regained any cognition, he wouldn’t get closure from the man who had arranged the kidnap of his soulmate, assaulted her and plotted the murder of Lady Adelaide. In Bastien’s mind, those plans almost overshadowed his scheme to gain the throne of Cordonia and most likely rule as a despot far worse than Constantine. At least his former employer had maintained a semblance of benevolence and kindness to his subjects, despite doing things behind the scenes that Bastien still deeply regretted helping him to execute. He had the feeling that Anton’s reign would have been far worse, and he would have fled the country rather than serve him. Who knows whether Anton would have insisted on his loyalty or had him disposed of?

He decided that he didn’t feel the need to talk to Anton. If he had some level of cognition, he was suffering sufficiently. If he was unconscious in every sense of the word, it was pointless. He had already made him regret hurting Sophia, and Drake for Riley. This near vegetative state would atone as revenge for Lady Adelaide, and for Liam and Olivia. He rose from his seat and left the room, nodding to Paulos, the guard at the door, who stood to attention as he emerged.

‘As you were, son. You know the drill – no unscheduled visitors, and only staff that are on the approved list. If there’s an emergency, then any medical staff can be admitted. If you feel the need to observe him at any point, it must be with an approved member of staff. No single visitors or members of staff to be admitted apart from myself or the King. Have you got that?’

‘Yes Sir’ Bastien clapped him on the shoulder.

‘Good man. Contact Lewis in the first instance if you need to, or myself if he’s not available’ Bastien walked steadily away from Anton’s room without the aid of his cane, making for the SUV to go back to the Palace.

------

‘So in conclusion, Lord Severus is in a serious but stable condition.’ Liam said, looking into the TV camera lens in a statement to the nation from his office at the Palace. ‘I feel that he would not wish for us to cancel or postpone any Royal events, and were he able to speak for himself, he would applaud our continuing efforts to raise funds for deserving causes in Lythikos. Duchess Olivia herself has sponsored a brand new intensive care unit in the Lythos General Hospital in the hope that those needing specialist treatment in the Duchy would not lose valuable time having to be transported to the main Capitol Hospital.’ He looked down at his desk ‘Should there be any major change in Lord Severus’s condition I will be informed and will make any relevant decisions as needed’

‘And cut’ the director called ‘Thankyou your Majesty, this will be broadcast shortly’ The TV crew started to pack their things away, and Liam ran his fingers through his hair.

‘Thankyou for your professionalism’ he smiled graciously ‘It’s always a pleasure to work with you’ He hoped that his statement would soften the blow of Lucretia’s publicised confession to poisoning Anton. The popularity of Lythikos within Cordonia was seesawing wildly at the moment, and he intended for everything to end up with popular opinion firmly on Olivia’s side as the wronged Duchess, forced into a marriage she didn’t want and brought up by a ruthless and unfeeling relative. The week or so spent openly in her company would go some way toward softening her image ready for him to announce that she carried his heir.

Day by day it looked increasingly unlikely that Anton would ever be in a fit state to rule the country. CT scans had shown irreversible brain and nerve damage that meant he would at the very least be paralysed from the neck down, and at worst might never regain consciousness. Liam’s archivists and lawyers assured him that being fit to rule was an absolute necessity for any candidate to the throne. He wondered if part of his father’s reason for concealing his illness had been simply to remain in power as long as he could.

Now it was time for him to go to Lythikos for the charity snow sports. Nobles and commoners alike would compete for trophies in skiing, skating, bobsleighing and other events. Nobles would pay for the privilege of competing, and sponsorship for commoners had been invited from local and national businesses. Tickets were on sale to view the event and there would be a winter fair at which medals would be awarded, followed by a Ball at Olivia’s Lodge. Locals were already calling it the ‘Lytholympics’. There would be something to suit every pocket, and people would flock to the Duchy from all over Cordonia now that the King had announced that it was going ahead despite the attempt on Anton’s life.

Olivia was waiting for him in his private lounge, her bags packed ready to leave for her home duchy. She looked tired but a little less pale. Liam went up to her and she offered her cheek for a kiss. He was tempted to hug her, but held back. He didn’t want to crowd her. Instead he took her hands in his and squeezed them.

‘Chin up Livvy, it looks increasingly likely that Anton won’t be in a position to complete his challenge’ She smiled wanly.

‘I wish I could be certain’ she said fiercely. ‘Perhaps I should pay one last visit to my aunt before we go’

‘Only if you feel up to it’ Liam said softly ‘But if you think it would bring you closure, I’m right behind you. We have an hour or two to spare.’ She took a deep breath and stood straight.

‘I think I am, but I’d like to talk to her alone. You can come, but stay outside. We can take the limo to the cottage and then go straight off to Lythikos’

‘Of course. I’ll let Bastien know’

Half an hour or so later, Olivia sat in her aunt’s lounge, waiting for Lucretia. She appeared, but Olivia remained seated.

‘Niece’ the older woman said, sitting in an easy chair beside the fireplace. ‘Will you take tea?’

‘No thankyou’ she said shortly ‘A glass of water will be sufficient. I hope I can trust you not to add any herbal extracts to it’

‘Of course not’ her aunt snorted ‘You’re mother to the royal heir, and Nevrakis only hope of going forward into the future. I did what I did to ensure your wellbeing’ Olivia raised her eyebrow to that but didn’t reply. ‘So what do you want, my dear?’

‘I won’t beat around the bush. I need to know if Anton is likely to recover his senses and make his claim to the throne’

‘Is that all?’

‘Isn’t it enough?’ A maid came in with a tray and set it down on the coffee table. Olivia’s eyes flicked to the teapot and a plate of Lythican spiced cookies.

‘Bring some tap water would you?’ her aunt demanded ‘I’ll pour my own tea’ She did so, and Olivia gritted her teeth waiting. The maid came back with water, and Lucretia sipped her tea.

‘He’ll not recover’ she replied at last. ‘He’s paralysed, I take it?’ Olivia nodded ‘He will remain so, but how long he lingers depends on his constitution. Most who have been – treated in this way never speak again, and generally the poison causes a lingering death.’

‘Generally?’ Olivia asked

‘Oh don’t worry my dear - what I meant was that death is certain, but how swiftly it comes varies - as I said.’

‘Will you reveal what herb it is?’

‘Oh no dear, to be frank I don’t know. Only my herbalist does, and even the identity of that person is unknown to me, as is traditional. You are sadly lacking in certain aspects of Lythican folklore, my girl. But don’t fret, all will be passed on to you in the fullness of time. I look forward to seeing you ascend the throne’

‘I’ll not ask for that’ Olivia said, thin lipped ‘I don’t wish to be Queen. What I do want is that Liam is happy, and he has agreed that by me bearing the heir, he will be content’ Lucretia frowned

‘Not want to be Queen? Are you insane, girl? If you just act like a human incubator, who’s to say he won’t take your child away? He could discard you once he has his heir, and take another woman. Who’s to say he hasn’t made the same arrangement with other women, and promised them the same?’ Olivia’s eyes grew wide.

‘Liam’s not like that’ she said in a low voice ‘He’s not like his father – he’s gentle and caring’

‘Do you think he’ll stay the same with the weight of the crown on his head?’ Lucretia scoffed ‘Power corrupts, and he is his father’s son. He was not raised to be King, and he has barely had time to adjust to his new role. Demand to be the Queen you should be, Olivia. Hold the King to ransom – refuse him your child. Shut yourself off, close the borders of Lythikos or flee to exile if he refuses.’ She leaned forward, stabbing a forefinger at her niece to make her point. ‘You know you would be Queen if he becomes incapable of ruling, and that would be so very easy for me to arrange’

‘Are you threatening to do the same to Liam as you did to Anton?’ Olivia gasped. ‘What sort of monster are you?’

‘The monster that will fulfil the ambition of our family’ she replied ‘If you won’t make sure of your accession to the throne, I will’

‘I’ll see to it that you don’t’ Olivia hissed ‘You won’t meddle in my life any longer, you old witch’ Lucretia sat back and smiled, and Olivia rose with dignity and left the room.

---------

Liam was waiting for her outside the cottage. She was tight lipped and pale with rage.

‘Lets get out of this place’ she said ‘Let’s go to Lythikos’ She made for the car, and Liam followed her. She sat back in the seat, letting her head drop back against the leather headrest and closing her eyes, her hand going protectively to her belly. Liam sat back too, but remained silent for a while. He wanted to know what had her riled up, and the sooner the better, to help her to calm down. As the limo swept out of the Palace gates onto the main road, he leaned forward to close the security screen between them and the driver and switched off the intercom, a red light showing its status. He turned to Olivia as she opened her eyes and looked at him in query.

‘Tell me what she said, Livvy. No-one can hear us, it’s just us’ Olivia swallowed and turned her head to him.

‘You need to put her under maximum security’ she said, her gaze urgent ‘No contact with anyone outside, not even her lawyer. She got a message out though her before and god knows what other tricks she has up her sleeve’

‘Why Livvy, what danger does she pose? Can she have Anton wake up?’

‘No’ she said shortly. ‘Death is certain, though she couldn’t say when’

‘She said something about the end of the week’ Liam replied. He inclined his head and reached out for her hand. ‘That’s not all, is it?’ She shook her head

‘It’s only fair to tell you that she threatened to do the same to you’ Liam felt the colour drain from his face, and she made a hollow laugh ‘After all, if anything happens to you now, I become Queen’

‘You said you didn’t want that’ Liam said levelly. She tutted in exasperation

‘I don’t.’ she said, and raised her green eyes to his ‘I only want you to be happy’ He took a deep breath.

‘What if you were Queen?’ he asked ‘would she back off then?’ Olivia blinked, and stared at him.

‘What if I…’ her voice trailed off ‘I - I don’t know’ she said simply, then started again ‘What do you mean?’

‘If I made you Queen, she’d have no reason to have me assassinated’

‘I – who knows what goes on in that bitch’s mind? But Liam…’ she protested.

‘If it would put your mind at rest, stop you worrying, I’d do it’ he said ‘Why not? You can do as much or as little as you like, and we’d be together to bring up our child. When Leo abdicated, I expected to be forced into marrying Madeleine, with a Cordonian arrangement.’

‘I can’t believe you just said that’ Olivia said, aghast ‘After all we’ve been through’ She turned away from him, biting her knuckle. He was sure that if they’d not been in the limo on their way to Lythikos, she would have slapped him or stormed out.

‘Hear me out, Livvy’ he said ‘You’ve – well you’ve changed since you fell pregnant. You’re – you’re softer.’ He struggled for words. ‘I don’t look at other women the same. Or men, for that matter. You’re carrying my child. I just want to keep you both safe.’ She turned to him, fire in her eyes

‘So I’m just a human incubator to you – that’s what Lucretia said’

‘No Livvy, that’s not it’ he said ‘It’s more than that. We have a connection, always have had, but Father tried his best to break it. Now he’s gone, I realise. I’d never do anything to hurt you’ he said.

‘You say that now’ she said ‘But you have a country to run. I’ll never be more important than that’

‘Then help me to do it’ he said simply. She stared at him

‘I never wanted that’ she said ‘Leo was going to be King, and we – I always thought that we’d have some sort of relationship, even if I was just one of many’ He sighed

‘And I never expected to be King, you know that. Livvy, you and Drake are my oldest friends. It looks like Drake is involved with Riley – I don’t know how long he’ll stay. He came back from America for me, I can’t ask him to sacrifice his happiness for me’

‘And you can ask me?’ she said

‘But you said you wanted me to be happy’ he pointed out. ‘What would make me happy is to have a loving family, and we’re halfway there. Being King is – well of course it will be my duty for my country to come first – but whatever is left over is yours, and our child’s’ He smiled ‘I won’t have time for lovers, I’ve realised that.’

‘What if I want lovers?’ she said shortly. His face dropped. She felt cruel for asking him, but the question bubbled up and was out of her mouth before she could stop it – typical Nevrakis hot headedness, she told herself.

‘I would hope I would be enough – but if you did…’ he looked out of the window at the passing scenery. ‘I don’t know Livvy, it’s too early to say. Who knows what life will bring.’ She relented, taking his hand, wanting to banish the hurt in his eyes.

‘I’m sorry, that was callous of me. We should focus on the baby, and what he or she needs. I think we’ll both have enough on our plates being parents.’ She paused. ‘Liam, have you made any arrangement like this with anyone else?’ he stared at her

‘No, of course not’ he replied, shocked.

‘I have to ask. Lucretia brought it up’ His jaw tightened at her words.

‘She’s been pouring poison into your ears. Just what else did she say?’ Olivia closed her eyes in thought. She related everything to him as the limo made its way along the increasingly steep roads. Anger rose in him as he heard what the old woman thought of him.

‘I’d never take your child away from you.’ He said earnestly. ‘I’m determined not to follow my father’s example. I can have Lucretia locked away in maximum security if it would make you feel better. My feeling is that she would do anything to get you on the throne, and probably more to keep you there. I’m superfluous to her. She only cares about getting your family on the throne, with or without me.’ Olivia nodded reluctantly

‘I know. Once I was on the throne, who’s to say she wouldn’t try to have you assassinated?’

‘Livvy’ he said, taking her hand and squeezing it. ‘You know how many attempts there have been over the years. If it wasn’t her, it would be someone else. I’m still at risk no matter what. At least if she was locked away it would make it difficult for her and she’d be a known threat’ Olivia twisted her hands in her lap and sighed

‘I’m exhausted’ she said ‘I’m going to try and get some sleep. We can talk later.’

‘Okay Livvy. But I’m serious – I’d make you my Queen to make both our lives easier’  A faint smile crossed Olivia’s lips as she settled back.

‘I don’t doubt your sincerity, Liam’ she said ‘I’ll think about it’

@sirbeepsalot @stopforamoment @drakesensworld @katedrakeohd​ @texaskitten30​ @be-still-my-aching-heart @hopefulmoonobject @dcbbw @classylady1234 @rainbowsinthestorm @kimmiedoo5 @bascmve01  @ibldw-main @addictedtodrakefanfic @trappedinfandoms @ravenpuff02

[dukereviewsxtra]

Duke Reviews Xtra: The 10th Kingdom Part 2

Part 2 Starts With The Evil Queen Digging Up All Her Mirrors..

As Virginia's Iron Shoes Are Ready For Her To Wear, However A Box That Smells Like Leather

Yeah, Trolls Have An Affinity Toward Leather, Go Figure...

Falls Right Through The Window, The 3 Trolls Fight Over It And Knock Themselves Out In The Process...

Flying In To Save Virginia, Virginia's Less Than Trusting Of Wolf As The Last Time She Saw Him He Tried To Eat Her Grandmother But Giving His Word That She's Safe With Him, He Goes To Find A Way Out Only To Notice The Troll King's Magic Shoes...

Telling Her To Leave Them As They'll Make Her Want To Wear Them All The Time She Seems To Do Just That As They Get Out Of That Castle...

Wanting To Go Back To The Snow White Memorial Prison To Rescue Tony, Wolf Is Resistant At First But Eventually Says Okay But They Have To Avoid The Roads And Instead Cut Through Beanstalk Forest...

Once There, They Find A Statue Of Jack From Jack And The Beanstalk, This Leads Wolf To Tell Virginia Why The Trolls Hate Wendell And That's Because Wendell Has A Fertile Kingdom And They Have A Polluted Disgusting Kingdom...

Oh No, Somebody Call Captain Planet!

But Wolf's Words Fall On Deaf Ears As Virginia Is Gone Which Can Only Mean One Thing...

She Stole The Troll King's Magic Shoes!

But Despite That Wolf Eventually Finds Her As The Shoes Magic Doesn't Last Long. Taking The Shoes Away From Her After A Short Struggle, Virginia Tries Everything She Can To Try To Get Them Back Even To The Point Of Seduction...

But Despite Being Attracted To Her, Wolf Knows It's The Shoes Doing The Talking And Not Her...

But With The Troll King And His Kids Closing In, Virginia And Wolf Decide To Climb A Beanstalk Where They Get To Know Each Other A Little Better As They Spend The Night From Above...

The Next Day, Believing Security Around The Prison To Be A Joke, The Warden Decides To Have The Prisoners Clean Out The Cellar Where The Mirror Is So New Security Measures Can Be Put Into Place...

Realizing That's Where The Mirror Is, Wendell Puts Tony's Name On The Work Detail, However, When He Finds Mirror, The Warden Tells Him To Throw It In The Boat Or Else He'll Throw Him And Everyone Connected To The Chain He's On Into The Ocean...

So, Tony Throws It Into The Boat Where By Some Miracle It Doesn't Break...

Put Back In His Cell, Tony Discovers That Acorn And Clayface Have Created A Tunnel Out Of The Prison, Asking Him To Let Him Come With Them, They Say Yes...

However, Tony's Escape Might Be A Bit Premature As Virginia And Wolf Arrive To Get Tony Out Of Prison By Using The Troll King's Magic Shoes...

Once Inside, They Get Wendell From The Warden's Office Despite Wolf Knowing That With Him The Shoes Will Lose Their Magic Quicker And What Do You Know? He's Right As Once They Reach Tony's Cell The Shoes Lose Their Magic...

But As They Crawl Through The Tunnel, They're Blocked By Tony's Big Butt As He Got Stuck In The Tunnel When Attempting To Escape...

Maybe Tony Should Follow Winnie The Pooh's Example And Do Some Stoutness Exercises...

(Start At 0:51, End At 2:07)

Eventually Getting Tony Out Of The Tunnel, Father And Daughter Are Reunited As Tony Tells Virginia About The Mirror Being Placed On A Barge, However When They Go To Get It They It, They Discover That Acorn Used The Barge To Escape, Taking Everything Including The Mirror With Him...

Getting On A Boat To Follow Acorn, They're Spotted By The Trolls Who Attempt To Virginia And The Others But They Manage To Get Away To The Troll King's Displeasure, But He Has Bigger Problems Right Now As He's Contacted By The Evil Queen...

Wondering If The Troll King's Children Have Caught Wendell, He Tells Her No, As She Orders Him To Send His Children After Them And To Return To His Palace Until Further Notice...

But Saying He Doesn't Take Orders From Her, He Swears That If She Contacts Him This Way Again, He'll Kill Her...

Reading One Of His Self Help Books, Wolf Takes The Opportunity To Get Rid Of The Troll King's Magic Shoes Which Pisses Virginia Off To No End At First But Guessing That She Was Going To Wear Them Tonight, He Tells Her That While Magic Is Nice It's Very Easy To Get Addicted...

This Leads Her To Ask Wolf Why She Wasn't Able To Resist The Shoes But He Was? To Which He Believes The Reason To Be That Virginia Has A Strong Desire To Be Invisible...

Tired Of Waiting For The Evil Queen To Take Over Wendell's Kingdom, The Troll King Declares War On The 4th Kingdom And Challenges Wendell To Face Him In 7 Days Or He'll Claim It As His Own...

The Next Day, Wolf Wakes Virginia And Tony Only For Tony To Discover A Golden Fish In A Glass Case. Named The Golden River Gold Fish, Wolf Tells Tony And Virginia That This Is The Famous Anything You Touch Will Turn To Gold Fish...

With Tony Seeing Untold Possibilities With The Fish, Wolf And Virginia Tell Him To Just Leave It Alone

Contacting The Troll King In The 4th Kingdom, The Evil Queen Is Rightfully Pissed At Him For Obeying Her Orders And That If He Stays There, The Coronation Will Be Cancelled And Her Plans Will Be Ruined...

But Having No Interest In Leaving The 4th Kingdom, She Hangs Up On Him So She Can Consult With Her Mirror, Who Tells Her That Wendell Is Travelling Down The River Toward Her Castle With 3 Others, 1 Who Can Talk With Him And 1 Who Can Hurt Her...

Asking To See These People, The Mirror Tells Her That He Can't Show Them To Her But Knowing That Wolf Is With Them, She Tells The Mirror To Focus On Him...

Oh, God The Bee Gees Running Gag Is Back...

(Start At 0:46, End At 0:49)

Contacting Wolf As He's Shaving, He Just Tells The Queen To Go Away And Leave Him Alone Before Tony Enters And Hangs Up, Washing His Face Off As He Leaves...

However As Tony Looks For Food, He Decides To Go Back To Look At The Golden Fish Only To Break The Glass By Coughing (Of All The Luck) And Sticking His Pinky Inside The Fish Gaining The One Time Ability To Turn Something Into Gold...

All I Can Say To That Is Thank God He's Not Dr. Evil Or Else He'd Turn Himself Into Gold...

Meanwhile At The Queen's Castle, Dog Wendell Pees On A Post...

As The Evil Queen Tries To Convince Him That He's Not A Dog But Prince Wendell, Ruler Of The 4th Kingdom And That In Order To Be Crowned King He Must Show Bravery, Loyalty And Intelligence...

Why Can't They Do It The Wakandan Way And Challenge Someone To Single Combat?

Finding Acorn's Barge At A Town, Near The Queen's Castle, Wendell Goes Off On His Own To Investigate The Castle (As He Can Sense His Body There) While Tony And The Others Go To Get The Mirror From Acorn...

However, When They Arrive, They Find Acorn And Whatever Junk Was On-Board Gone, With The Person Who Now Owns The Barge Telling Them That He Traded It For The Guy's Horse And Carriage, Which He Took Through The Woods...

But Despite Virginia And Wolf Wanting To Leave For The Woods Immediately Tony Asks For 15 Minutes To Find Wendell...

And Speaking Of Wendell, The Queen Is Giving Dog Wendell An Eating Lesson As The Trolls Arrive To Give Her An Update On Their Search For Wendell Which Goes Nowhere...

Telling Them To Not Return Without Wendell Or She'll Make Them Eat Their Own Hearts, The Trolls Leave Believing That Meeting Didn't Go Well...

Finding Himself, Wendell Tries To Get Dog Wendell To Reach Him But Unfortunately They're Unable To Touch So Wendell Goes Off To Get Help, But As He Goes To Find Tony, Wendell Is Found By Tony, The Trolls Also Find Him...

This Leads Tony To Do Something We Don't See On Screen But We Know He Did Something...

Finding Virginia And Wolf, Tony Tells Them That He Defeated The Trolls However When He Shows Them How, We See That Tony Not Only Turned Them Into Gold But Wendell As Well...

Summoning Her Huntsman (Played By Rutger Hauer)...

(Start At 0:13, Stop At 0:43)

The Evil Queen Tells Him That Neither Wolf Or The Trolls Have Captured Wendell And Whoever Is With Him Is About To Enter His Forest. Swearing To Find Them, He Leaves...

About To Enter The Forest, Virginia And The Others Run Into An Old Beggar Woman, Who's Hungry For Food, But Where Wolf And Tony Are Not So Charitable Virginia Gives Up One Of Their Bacon Sandwiches They Made Earlier...

As A Reward, The Woman Tells Them That Acorn Took The Main Road Through The Forest But She Warns Them To Get Off The Road At Once As Someone Is Following Them With The Intent To Kill Them...

This Gets Wolf Remembering That This Forest Is The Domain Of The Huntsman Who Serves The Queen, So Taking The Old Lady's Advice, They Stray From The Road And Go Through The Forest...

Coming Across A Gypsy Camp, They Try Going Around But They're Unfortunately Caught By Gypsies Who Seem Pretty Nice At First As They Invite Virginia And The Others To Join Them For Dinner...

Oh, And I See They're Having The Remains Of The First Trailer For Sonic The Hedgehog For Dinner...

Asking Tony To Sing In Return For Their Hospitality We Get The Most Groan Worthy Version Of Gypsies Tramps and Thieves Ever...

Cher Must Be Vomiting After Hearing That...

Finding A Bunch Of Talking Birds In Cages, Wolf Tells Virginia They're Magic Birds That The Gypsies Break Their Wings Off To Sell For Millions To Rich People To Absorb Their Magic...

Why? What Does The Magic From These Birds Do?

Coming Out Of A Carriage An Old Gypsy Tells The Gypsies To Set Up A Table For Fortune Telling...

But While Tony's Fortune Is Nothing To Tell About, Virginia's Sees The Gypsy Asking For A Lock Of Her Hair (Which Will Come Back To Bite Virginia In The Ass) As She Tells Virginia That She's Full Of Anger As She's Never Forgiven Her Mother For Leaving Years Ago...

Something Her Grandmother Mentioned In Part 1 That I Thought Wasn't Worth Mentioning Till Now...

She Also Tells Virginia That She Has A Great Destiny One That Stretches Way Back In Time...

With Virginia Leaving, It's Wolf's Turn To Have His Fortune Told, But It Doesn't Go The Way He Wants It As The Gypsy Tells Him That She Saw A Young Girl Dead And A Fire With Him To Burnt On It...

Remember This Fortune As It Will Be Further Developed In Part 3...

Knowing That Wolf Is A Wolf From The Fortune, This Leads Wolf To Reveal That The Gypsies Grandson Is Also A Wolf...

?

Allowing Virginia And The Others To Spend The Night, They Attempt To Sneak Out Early The Next Morning, But Virginia Just Can't Leave The Talking Birds To Die So She Frees Them All Only To Be Seen By The Head Gypsy Who Sends The Other Gypsies After Them...

But While They Manage To Get Away From The Gypsies, The Head Gypsy Uses The Hair She Cut From Virginia To Curse Her...

But Don't Worry About The Gypsies Becoming A New Threat As They're All Killed By The Huntsman...

Continuing On Their Journey, Wolf And Tony Start To Notice That Virginia's Hair Has Grown Slightly Since They Left The Gypsy Camp Which Leads Wolf To Theorize That The Gypsies Have Cursed Her..

Duh...

By Nightfall It Starts To Rain, As Virginia's Hair Has Grown To Length Of Rapunzel's. Luckily, They Come Across A Cottage That's Been Abandoned For Years, Going Upstairs They Find Seven Beds Which Leads Them To Realize That This Cottage Once Belonged To The Seven Dwarves...

Starting A Fire, Tony Asks The Question That We've Been Dying To Have Answered, What Happened To Snow White After She Married The Prince?..

This Leads Wolf To Tell Them That She Became A Great Queen And One Of The Five Women Who Changed History..

With The Women Being, (Aside From Snow White) Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Red Riding Hood?, Gretel From Hansel And Gretel? And Rapunzel...

Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella And Rapunzel, I Can Handle Being Queens But Having Red Riding Hood And Gretel Is Like Making Alice From Alice In Wonderland A Princess In Kingdom Hearts, It Doesn't Work...

The 5 Of Them Formed First 5 Kingdoms And Brought Peace To All The Lands. But Now They're All Mostly Dead, I Say Mostly As There's Rumors That Cinderella Is Still Alive But If She Was, She'd Be Over 200 Years Old...

(Acting Like Joey Lawrence) Whoa!

Virginia Spends The Night Talking With Wolf About Her Mother Which Just More Exposition At This Point...

But Waking Up Virginia Finds That Her Hair Is All Over The House, And What's Worse It's Growing Up The Stairs...

They Try Using Cutting Tools To Cut Virginia's Hair But Nothing Can Cut Through It...

It's A Curse For A Reason, You Morons...

Worried About Dying With Long Hair, One Of The Birds Virginia Saved From The Gypsies Helps By Telling Them That A Woodsman With A Magic Axe That Can Cut Through Anything Lives In This Forest And With It They Can Break The Curse...

However, Wolf Smells The Huntsman And Decides To Bury Virginia, Tony And The Golden Wendell In Holes While He Leads The Huntsman In A Circle..

But It Sadly Doesn't Help As Virginia Sneezes Revealing Their Location To The Huntsman...

Forced To Run, Tony Gets Away To Tell Wolf What Happened While Virginia Gets Caught By The Huntsman And Is Taken To His Headquarters, Which Finally Ends Part 2...

To Be Continued...

[jahaanofmenaphos]

Art by the awesome @tommieglenn!

Of Gods and Men Summary:

When the gods returned to Gielinor, their minds were only on one thing: the Stone of Jas, a powerful elder artefact in the hands of Sliske, a devious Mahjarrat who stole it for his own ends and entertainment. He claims to want to incite another god wars, but are his ulterior motives more sinister than that? And can the World Guardian, Jahaan, escape from under Sliske’s shadow?

Read the full work here:

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QUEST 06: FATE OF THE GODS

QUEST SUMMARY:

The gods have returned to Gielinor, but something is preventing the arrival of Zaros. Jahaan is enlisted by Azzanadra to help bring his god back to their world, a task that would send him into the harshities of the Mahjarrat homeworld: Freneskae…

CHAPTER 4: ZAROSIAN REPRISE

When Jahaan materialised back onto firm ground, he was back beside the World Gate, the earthquakes from Mah’s nightmares only a faint tremble this far out. Trying to calm his erratic heartbeat, Jahaan doubled over, clutching his knees and panting with all the built up adrenaline.

Zaros, naturally, did not seem phased at all. “Mah awakens,” was all he said.

“Yeah,” Jahaan replied within gasps. “Shouldn’t we be getting out of here?”

“Not yet. We are safe for now, and I have something I wish to say before I return to Gielinor.”

Due to Zaros’ nature, he didn’t walk. Instead, he hovered, a few inches above the ground, his robes grazing the rocks beneath him. He glided slightly closer to Jahaan, towering over the man by a good two feet. Yet, Jahaan was not scared, and Zaros could sense this. It pleased him.

“When I was inside your mind,” Zaros began, “I could not lie to you, nor could you to me. I saw Sliske’s poison. I wanted to thank you for not letting his corruption influence you.”

Internally, Jahaan winced. “Then by that logic, you also knew I’d decided to hear him out.”

“I did, as is your right,” Zaros confirmed, but there was no hint of anger or disappointment in his monotonous voice. “I did not want to compel your fealty. I wanted to earn your support. While I do not condone Sliske’s insidious words, I am grateful you saw through them. You may come to learn something about me, that I… compel loyalty within others.”

Jahaan crinkled his brow. “Against their will?”

“It is not something I have control of,” Zaros explained, calmly. “It is something bestowed upon me by Mah. I am unable to rid myself of this... ability... but I must live with it. Do not be concerned - it does not affect you, World Guardian.”

Jahaan noted the concern, almost shame, in Zaros’ voice. It was hard to gauge the diety’s emotions - his voice was hardly expressive - but Jahaan could sense it nonetheless. “But it affects your followers?”

“Yes. It is one of the reasons I chose to withdraw from my own empire,” he admitted. “I find the idea of coercing another mind to be... distasteful. But it only affects those in my presence, and the effect dissipates with time. This is how I know that those still loyal to me are truly loyal. They have not been under its effects for many centuries, yet still heed my call. I wished for you to know this from me, so that you could understand it. Now you know this of me, might I ask one question of you?”

Jahaan nodded, so Zaros continued, “You could have left me behind, or wounded me with a light simulacrum. I was dependent on you, and you assisted me with little benefit to yourself. Why?”

Jahaan thought for a moment, choosing his words carefully. “Because you were genuine. Honest. Your intentions seem honourable. I might not be waving a banner with your emblem on it, but I don’t want to make an enemy out of you either. You convinced me to hear you out. I heard you out. And believe me, I like what you’re saying a lot more than some of the other gods prancing around.”

“Thank you, World Guardian,” Zaros replied, softly. “Come now. I wish to greet my loyal followers.”

When Jahaan emerged back through the World Gate, the site of Gielinor filled him with so much glee and relief that he felt like kissing the ground. The sun, the sun! It was near blinding, but he didn’t want to look away. And the breeze, the cool wind that danced around him, tickling his skin.

The company surrounding the World Gate had doubled since he’d entered; Azzanadra and Sliske remained, the former as eager to see his lord as a child is for the arrival of Christmas. Next to him, two of Zaros’ most formidable followers had joined the Mahjarrat to see Zaros’ return, both of whom Jahaan had the unfortunate pleasure of having dalliances with before, back in Guthix’s cave. The first, a fire enchantress in the service of Zaros by the name of ‘Char’. A dancer, brown-skinned and with hair that undulated like a blanket of fire. The other, a nihil (of which Jahaan had officially had enough of today) by the name of ‘Nex’, a creature that even the gods fear.

“My lord! You are returned!” Azzanadra exclaimed, sounding like he was about to burst into tears of joy. “You are exactly as I remember.”

“We have the World Guardian to thank for that,” Zaros commended. “And I shall reward him in due course. But first, something requires my attention. Sliske.”

Zaros spun around to face Mahjarrat who was hunched over like a silk-draped vulture. Sliske’s smile was thin, his eyes unreadable as he stated, “I am yours to command. Just say the word.”

“No more.”

Sliske blinked. “What did you say?”

Jahaan took a small step backwards, slightly behind Azzanadra, as Zaros repeated, “No. More.”

Sliske cottoned on at this point. “But... no! I... I am loyal! Have I not always been loyal?” to hear Sliske’s wavered tone, a cocktail of hurt and disbelief, baffled Jahaan to no end. It also slightly scared him as, the more Sliske spoke, the angrier he became. “Have I not done everything you've always asked of me? As the empire fell, did I not keep safe those things necessary for your return? Was I not pivotal in the liberation of all those who stand before?” he was practically shouting at this point. “Did I not kill a god for you?! You cannot turn me away! Not now, Zaros, please!”

Jahaan couldn’t keep his eyes off the seething Mahjarrat. Surely Sliske would have known that something like this would occur. His hesitation to allow Zaros’ return was evident enough of that. But his reaction, so volatile, so desperate, to hear him plead… what was his angle? Was this one of his charades, or was he finally showing some raw, genuine emotion?

“Sliske, stop,” was all Zaros replied.

There was a long, drawn out pause while Sliske locked eyes with the deity. Finally, he broke into laughter. A hollow, mirthless ghost of a laugh. That might have been the most terrifying thing of all.

His light, empty chuckle remained as he said, “Very well. I guess I'm not quite the actor I thought. What gave me away?”

Jahaan was still on edge, confused about the tonal shift. There was something not quite right about the way he spoke, his mannerisms. More so than usual, that is.

There was something not quite right, and Jahaan couldn’t put his finger on it.

Zaros did not falter. “You betray yourself... though, in truth, I have never trusted you. And your words of betrayal to the World Guardian cannot be ignored.”

“Betrayal?” Sliske spat the word like it was poison. “They could have just walked away, left you to rot! I was just convincing them to hear you out. It was down to you to convince them of your worth!”

“Whatever your intent, no longer can I turn a blind eye to your disobedience, nor condone your methods.”

“Are you sure it's not just because me killing Guthix puts me beyond your control?” Sliske’s eyes flashed with fire, a hint of smugness lighting the edges.

Zaros exhaled deeply, providing no comment.

The smugness in Sliske’s smile grew, a victory assured. “Fine, don't answer. So, what's next? An intervention? Family counselling? Maybe some trust exercises?”

“Excommunication,” Zaros declared, the word reverberating like a gunshot. “You will have no further association with us. You are on your own.”

Sliske sniffed a lone, humourless laugh. His smile returned, the curve a little crueler and less self-satisfied. “Oh, I've always been alone. But I guess this means you'll have to find someone else to do your dirty work. Your new World Guardian pet, perhaps?”

“Leave us. Never return,” Zaros demanded. Nex and Char looked as if they were fit to burn the forest down with Sliske inside. Azzanadra, for his part, looked just as disappointed as he did furious, the betrayal cutting slightly deeper to him.

“As you command... my lord,” Sliske mocked with a faint bow. He then turned his attention to Jahaan; meeting the Mahjarrat’s fiery gaze made Jahaan want to back away, but he held himself firm. “But don't think this is over, World Guardian. I'm just getting started with you.”

He took a step forward. Azzanadra moved to intercept, but Zaros motioned for him to stand down.

Sliske’s eyes practically burned with yellow fire, staring Jahaan down like a predator. “Where I'm concerned, Zaros' protection of you no longer applies. Between you and me, all bets are off. Be seeing you.”

With that, he teleported away in a flurry of shadows.

Finally, Jahaan released the breath he’d been holding for far too long. To Zaros, he asked, “What did Sliske mean by ‘protection’?”

“You are important,” Zaros simply replied. “You must be kept safe.”

“Well, no offense,” Jahaan began, somewhat tetchily, “But a little more protection would have been nice when Sliske had his hands around my throat last night.”

Azzanadra blinked. “What was that?”

“When you gave him the task of delivering your letter,” Jahaan didn’t want to make eye contact with the Mahjarrat; he was already regretting mentioning the incident, and the memory was making him angry. “It doesn’t matter. Forget I said anything.”

Shaking his head with confusion, Azzanadra started, “I do not understand why he-”

“Azzanadra, it’s okay,” Jahaan interrupted, his tone softer now. “I handled it. It’s fine. Alright?”

Sighing, Azzanadra replied, “If you insist. I apologise for bringing him to you. If it’s any consolation,” he stepped slightly closer to Jahaan, scrunching his face up in a way that Jahaan assumed was his attempt at reassurance, but he didn’t have the features for it. “Sliske’s mood has always changed like the weather. He is angry now, but I don’t believe it will last long. But if he approaches you again, find me. I will deal with him personally.”

Smiling weakly, Jahaan said, “Thanks, Azzanadra.”

Having listened to the conversation mutely, retaining all but adding nothing, Zaros finally spoke up, “Sliske is an unknown quantity, and a dangerous enemy.”

Turning around to face Char, he instructed, “Char, keep an eye on Sliske. It gives me pause that he holds both the Siphon and the Catalyst. I do not want him thinking he can follow in Zamorak's footsteps. He is angry, and may attempt something rash. Inform me if he leads you to the location of either artefact. None of the young gods should have free access to such tools. Especially the Catalyst – the dragonkin cannot grow too strong before we are placed to deal with them.”

“As you command,” Char bowed slowly, fire dancing on her lips. “I am heartened to see you returned.”

After she teleported away, Zaros then turned his attention to Nex. “Nex, I task you with keeping Sliske's little game in check - watch the young gods. Try to contain their destruction as much as possible, but do not get drawn into open conflict. There may come a time that I need you to step in to ensure nothing interferes with my plans.”

“At once, my lord,” Nex hissed, teleporting away in a myriad of black and purple electric pulses.

Next, his attention returned to Azzanadra. “And to Azzanadra, my most loyal servant. Together we must prepare to rouse the elder gods. Zamorak's desperation at the end of the last God Wars scattered this planet's anima mundi, but even that was not enough to wake them - only Guthix.”

Azzanadra hesitated, a brief flash of worry in his eyes. “Y-You wish to create a greater level of destruction?”

“Not greater; more targeted,” Zaros assured, echos in his bellowing yet measured voice. “I require you to seek out Gielinor's own Elder Halls. If disturbed, the elder gods will have no choice but to respond.”

“It will be done, my lord,” Azzanadra vowed, crossing his arms over his chest and whisking himself away.

Finally, Zaros approached Jahaan; silence surrounded the entire landscape, save for the low hum from the World Gate and the brisk breeze fluttering through the trees. “Now has come the time for us to part, World Guardian. Reflect on all you have witnessed this day. Gielinor's reckoning is coming, but there is still time for us to avert it. Until I call on you again, do as you otherwise would, had we not met. Pax tecum.”

With a nod of his head, Jahaan simply replied, “Farewell.”

Zaros left his side, transporting the World Gate away with him, like it was never there at all.

Jahaan was alone once again.

But he wasn’t alone for long…

DISCLAIMER:

As Of Gods and Men is a reimagining, retelling and reworking of the Sixth Age, a LOT of dialogue/characters/plotlines/etc. are pulled right from the game itself, and this belongs to Jagex.

Previous chapter / Next chapter

[kyberled]

🛠 u mentioned Braig has nieces n nephews? via the half brother

Send “🛠” and I will reveal some OCs, NPCs, or side characters I have || Accepting

He does! Karvan has three kids, Rilan, Jaxie, and Doe - Braig’s– Half-nephew and half-nieces, I suppose. Rilan is the oldest, and the only boy; He was named by their other parent, Koslin. Karvan named the girls, and if I’m being completely honest they’d only been expecting one girl, so he didn’t have another name picked out when Doe became a thing.

Rilan Orit Farrunner-Nel is a young man who, like his own father, doesn’t really have much of a tie to his family. Karvan and Koslin are decent enough parents, to be fair, Rilan just doesn’t feel that attached. He could walk away without feeling any remorse, if it weren’t for his sisters. He’s not a devoted sibling by any means, but the rough nature of the Outer Rim has convinced him that he’s gotta keep them out of trouble until they’re old enough to take care of themselves. It was more a dull sense of duty than actual emotional attachment.

Rilan starts his life helping his father in the spice smuggling business, mostly by being a distraction. Education wasn’t really a thing where he grew up, so he was just glad he’s literate. He never really connected with the job, just like he never connected with his home, his family, or anything else, really. I guess you could describe Rilan as apathetic wanderlust personified. Home just wasn’t interesting, wasn’t satisfying to him.

Kirtste’s gang had more or less dissolved completely by the time Rilan was old enough to run about on his own (say, early teens), and Sabashe Kirtste himself was probably on his last legs, simply due to age. At most, Rilan was interested in the old crook’s stories of adventure through the stars, and mildly enjoyed the company of Ritski and Muro, the only two of the lot who actually stuck around. By the time he was in his mid- to late teens, Rilan had gotten bored with life in general. He boarded a ship headed out to who-knew-where, carrying a pack loaded with a stash of credits, a few choice weapons, and a few packets of spices (not for himself, but to trade with those who don’t take credits; he’s learned a thing or two about surviving in the Empire). Kirtste would swear up and down that he hadn’t given any of that to the kid, and that it was all stolen; Ritski would say that Kirtste wasn’t exactly known for his honesty.

Rilan would eventually become a member of the Bounty Hunter’s Guild. He wasn’t one of their A-Listers, but, he was decent enough to eke out a living, and it kept his interest more than anything else he’d tried. His speciality lay in taking down smugglers and spice runners, since, having grown up among them and acted as one of them in his youth, he’s partial to the tricks of the trade. He also took a brief interest in biology, though this manifested itself as a fixation on biological weapons.

Rilan is actually the only member of his family to very nearly figure out he’s related to Braig. Through a very long and complicated series of events involving a blood sample and attempts at a transfusion, no less. Of course, Braig is not comfortable with anyone having a jar of his DNA on hand, especially a strange hunter employed by the Empire. In the resulting skirmish, Rilan’s ship crash-landed on a small agricultural planet on the outskirts of the Mid Rim. Rilan suffered a number of injuries, including head trauma which resulted in retrograde amnesia. Fortunately, Rilan was rescued by a family of farmers, and lived among them for a few months after his full recovery, until wanderlust hit him once more. Though some scraps of his early life would come back to him, he would never recall his entire life. Rilan would ‘rejoin’ the Bounty Hunter’s guild, only to retire when chronic headaches made hunting too difficult. Instead, he took on the role of training younger, up-and-coming hunters, and getting them ready for field work.

Jaxie Sera is the oldest of the Farrunner-Nel girls, and the second-born of the trio, right after Rilan. While she, like her brother, wasn’t satisfied with the life she was living, she decided to reach for something better without the need to travel. Instead, she listened to her parents’ stories of their various exploits and thought to herself, ‘I can do what they did, but I can do it better’. Like her brother, she would spend a lot of time with whatever remained of Kirtste’s gang, but she was less interested with their stories of traipsing about the galaxy, and more concerned with how they managed to operate successful businesses in their specific fields of smuggling, spice-dealing, and informing, and make mental notes on anything that seemed relevant to her. Kirtste and Muro would both say that they found her the scariest of Nel’s Brood, whereas Ritski would say that Jaxie reminded her most of herself (’that’s why she scares us’, Muro would say). She is a much less hands-on individual, and more of an ‘other peoples’ hands on’, in that if she can get someone else to do the dirty work for her, she will.

She has an unusual sense of loyalty to her community, which many people find to be at odds with her overall demeanour. While she often comes as cold, callous, and disinterested, she would, in her height of power, be one of the key players in keeping her run-down little planet safe from both the Empire and the Rebellion, to conduct its business as it liked. Unfortunately, this resulted in their home becoming a hive for smugglers, criminals, and other undesirables, and, by extension, bounty hunters, though she can work with that last one.

Like her siblings, she never got a formal education, but she was damn well street smart enough to rival the best of them. She started in the spice trade, and was known for slipping little bits of ‘extras’ to people who gave her something in return, until she could get them hooked, and thereby dependent on her. This expanded into Jaxie building a gang of her own. Shrewd in picking her generals, and ruling with an iron fist, Jaxie’s reign was long and prosperous, and she felt minimal risk walking down the street in the open. She rewarded loyalty to her, usually through money, spices, or prestige, but there were other benefits to being on her good side. An example would be when one of her right-hand ‘men’ and close friends, Tessier Malo, cued Jaxie in to a few of their own who were considering a coup. When asked for what she wanted as thanks, Tessier mentioned that her sister wasn’t doing so well. Jaxie struck up a deal with one of the bounty hunters who wanted in to what she was beginning to think of as ‘her’ planet, saying that she’d waive any and all fees if their guild could arrange for a physician to stop by for a while.

Jaxie’s power would eventually expand to neighbouring moons and planets, requiring her to travel back and forth, though she would always return to her home planet as a base. She lived a long, prosperous, and dangerous life, and took advantage of the power vacuum created by Palpatine’s death to cement herself as the leading powerhouse in their quadrant of the galaxy. She refused to join up with the galactic senate, since she’d grown up in a time that didn’t exactly foster confidence in the government. She died having retired to the ‘countryside’ of her home planet, in a well-fortified house she had built for herself, still rich, and still pulling the invisible puppet-strings that made her planet tick.

The last of the brood is Doe. Doe Arillisa Farrunner-Nel has always been told that she is nothing like her siblings, and has never been sure as to whether or not that’s a compliment. She’s always shown an interest in books and academia, even if she was only taught to read when she was around ten years old. Her favourite books were ones with pretty clothes or bright colours in them (she had to rely on the pictures alone for the better part of her childhood), but she also really liked the books with treasure maps and old-fashioned sailing ships. Doe, having grown up in the era of starship battles and chaos, thought that space-travel was far too dangerous for her tastes, but also that cruising along on one of those old-fashioned boats might be great fun. She very much wanted to make one, and decided to give it a go on her own. As you can imagine, this didn’t utterly disappointed by the results. Neither of her parents were particularly good at building things, so that was out; Rilan was at home less and less often, and was, in fact, gearing up to leave the planet entirely, so he was never around to ask; And Jaxie was in her ‘I only care about me’ phase (which she would eventually grow out of, mostly). So, alone in her quest, Doe decided to put that idea on the backburner until she could get it realised.

When Jaxie started flexing her political muscle, Doe decided she didn’t very much want to be around there. She didn’t know a lot about politics, but she did know that the Empire was as dangerous as it was ruthless, and that she didn’t want to get tangled up in that mess. Karvan and Koslin were more than a bit disappointed that their last child was leaving the nest, but there wasn’t much they could do to stop her, anyway. (Especially since not long after she set out, Karvan was shot and killed in a spice deal gone wrong, though Doe would never learn this). Doe decided to hitch a ride on a freighter’s ship, paying for her ride via a mixture of actual credits and mending garments, as she’d learned from her books. She wound up finding her way to the Mid Rim, and to a rather nice tropical planet. She was amazed by the clean air and bright skies and wide streets, such a contrast from her home town. The lack of industrialisation was refreshing to her, so she decided to stay. She made a good life for herself, and yes, did learn to build a boat. She would build quite a few of them, in fact, each with a brightly-coloured sail and painted sides. She would meet her future partner there, a lovely young individual by the name of Irol Flyrre, and they’d have four children together: Marla, Seff, Tianne, and Yira. Between Doe’s boats, sold to locals and tourists for work or amusement, and Irol’s fishing, the two managed to eke out a steady living, and remained a happy couple for the rest of their lives. Though Doe remained the master boat-smith, and Irol was always the superior fisher, they shared the tricks of their trades with each other and their children - Though Doe did insist that all four of the kiddos go to school, at least until they learned to read. She lived the most normal life out of her entire family, and she was fine with that.

(Also, I couldn’t find a good way to work this into her bio, but Doe’s trans.)

And that’s Braig’s nieces and nephew!

[jacobhinkley]

Lawyer: ShapeShift’s Membership Move Follows “Threats” From Regulators

News came yesterday that the Bitcoin exchange ShapeShift are introducing a new membership initiative — implying that users will have to provide more personal data in order to use the platform’s services.

ShapeShift Announces Membership Program

According to the company’s Tweet, which also contained a link to a more expansive definition of the new terms:

“ShapeShift has big news for our users! We are now offering a new membership program, which will provide users with more benefits & better user experience.”

As of now the registration is optional, but in the future it will become obligatory. The company positions the new initiative as a sort of loyalty program that will offer users additional benefits like favorable exchange rates and rewards for FOX token transactions.

ShapeShift’s CEO Erik Voorhees admits that the compulsory registration is a painful but necessary measure, dictated by the unclear regulatory landscape:

“Yes, that last detail sucks. We would prefer if the collection of personal information were not a mandatory element. We still firmly believe that individuals, regardless of their race, religion, or nationality, deserve the right to financial privacy, just as they deserve the right to privacy in their thoughts, in their relationships, and in their communications. Such privacy is a foundational element of civil and just society and should be defended by all good people. We remain committed to that cause, and it is best served if we are smart about our approach.”

Response in Crypto Community

In response to this news, Washington D.C.-based lawyer Jake Chervinsky stated that the moves have in fact been fueled by yet unidentified regulators, saying ShapeShifts’s decision to start collection user’s personal information is in response to threats perceived by financial authorities, and that, “in short, this is how regulators silently invade crypto.”

He begins by pointing to the fact that Voorhees is “a true bitcoiner who speaks passionately about financial privacy & separating money from state.” And adds that enforcement agencies rely heavily on financial surveillance, saying that the concept of anonymous cryptocurrency exchanges and transactions is a “nightmare for regulators & investigators.”

One of his Tweet’s read:

“Our financial system is expressly designed to give the government maximum insight into our financial behavior. To that end, most financial institutions have to perform customer due diligence and share information with regulators. We call this “know your customer” (KYC).”

He followed up by saying:

“Now, I’m *not* saying that I think ShapeShift qualifies as a money services business or that it’s legally obligated to perform KYC. But, I *am* guessing that FinCEN (or another agency) has threatened ShapeShift with an enforcement action if it doesn’t start to comply.”

In the end, Chervinsky reiterates that the announcement is not a sign that Voorhees has “sold out,” but instead places blame on regulatory authorities, saying that “[the government’s] fingerprints are all over this decision.” As of yet, no government agencies have made any official statements regarding ShapeShift’s moves.

That, Chervinsky says, “is just how regulation works.” A few hours ago Voorhees tweeted;

To clarify, the Membership program and the FOX token are systems we wanted to build for our users. The imposition of mandatory KYC within that Membership program is not something we want to do, nor something any user wants. It's a heavy decision done to derisk under duress.

— Erik Voorhees (@ErikVoorhees) September 6, 2018

  Image from Shutterstock

The post Lawyer: ShapeShift’s Membership Move Follows “Threats” From Regulators appeared first on NewsBTC.

Lawyer: ShapeShift’s Membership Move Follows “Threats” From Regulators published first on https://medium.com/@smartoptions

[michaelbennettcrypto]

Lawyer: ShapeShift’s Membership Move Follows “Threats” From Regulators

News came yesterday that the Bitcoin exchange ShapeShift are introducing a new membership initiative — implying that users will have to provide more personal data in order to use the platform’s services.

ShapeShift Announces Membership Program

According to the company’s Tweet, which also contained a link to a more expansive definition of the new terms:

“ShapeShift has big news for our users! We are now offering a new membership program, which will provide users with more benefits & better user experience.”

As of now the registration is optional, but in the future it will become obligatory. The company positions the new initiative as a sort of loyalty program that will offer users additional benefits like favorable exchange rates and rewards for FOX token transactions.

ShapeShift’s CEO Erik Voorhees admits that the compulsory registration is a painful but necessary measure, dictated by the unclear regulatory landscape:

“Yes, that last detail sucks. We would prefer if the collection of personal information were not a mandatory element. We still firmly believe that individuals, regardless of their race, religion, or nationality, deserve the right to financial privacy, just as they deserve the right to privacy in their thoughts, in their relationships, and in their communications. Such privacy is a foundational element of civil and just society and should be defended by all good people. We remain committed to that cause, and it is best served if we are smart about our approach.”

Response in Crypto Community

In response to this news, Washington D.C.-based lawyer Jake Chervinsky stated that the moves have in fact been fueled by yet unidentified regulators, saying ShapeShifts’s decision to start collection user’s personal information is in response to threats perceived by financial authorities, and that, “in short, this is how regulators silently invade crypto.”

He begins by pointing to the fact that Voorhees is “a true bitcoiner who speaks passionately about financial privacy & separating money from state.” And adds that enforcement agencies rely heavily on financial surveillance, saying that the concept of anonymous cryptocurrency exchanges and transactions is a “nightmare for regulators & investigators.”

One of his Tweet’s read:

“Our financial system is expressly designed to give the government maximum insight into our financial behavior. To that end, most financial institutions have to perform customer due diligence and share information with regulators. We call this “know your customer” (KYC).”

He followed up by saying:

“Now, I’m *not* saying that I think ShapeShift qualifies as a money services business or that it’s legally obligated to perform KYC. But, I *am* guessing that FinCEN (or another agency) has threatened ShapeShift with an enforcement action if it doesn’t start to comply.”

In the end, Chervinsky reiterates that the announcement is not a sign that Voorhees has “sold out,” but instead places blame on regulatory authorities, saying that “[the government’s] fingerprints are all over this decision.” As of yet, no government agencies have made any official statements regarding ShapeShift’s moves.

That, Chervinsky says, “is just how regulation works.” A few hours ago Voorhees tweeted;

To clarify, the Membership program and the FOX token are systems we wanted to build for our users. The imposition of mandatory KYC within that Membership program is not something we want to do, nor something any user wants. It's a heavy decision done to derisk under duress.

— Erik Voorhees (@ErikVoorhees) September 6, 2018

  Image from Shutterstock

The post Lawyer: ShapeShift’s Membership Move Follows “Threats” From Regulators appeared first on NewsBTC.

from Cryptocracken WP https://ift.tt/2CqrQ50 via IFTTT

[joshuajacksonlyblog]

Lawyer: ShapeShift’s Membership Move Follows “Threats” From Regulators

News came yesterday that the Bitcoin exchange ShapeShift are introducing a new membership initiative — implying that users will have to provide more personal data in order to use the platform’s services.

ShapeShift Announces Membership Program

According to the company’s Tweet, which also contained a link to a more expansive definition of the new terms:

“ShapeShift has big news for our users! We are now offering a new membership program, which will provide users with more benefits & better user experience.”

As of now the registration is optional, but in the future it will become obligatory. The company positions the new initiative as a sort of loyalty program that will offer users additional benefits like favorable exchange rates and rewards for FOX token transactions.

ShapeShift’s CEO Erik Voorhees admits that the compulsory registration is a painful but necessary measure, dictated by the unclear regulatory landscape:

“Yes, that last detail sucks. We would prefer if the collection of personal information were not a mandatory element. We still firmly believe that individuals, regardless of their race, religion, or nationality, deserve the right to financial privacy, just as they deserve the right to privacy in their thoughts, in their relationships, and in their communications. Such privacy is a foundational element of civil and just society and should be defended by all good people. We remain committed to that cause, and it is best served if we are smart about our approach.”

Response in Crypto Community

In response to this news, Washington D.C.-based lawyer Jake Chervinsky stated that the moves have in fact been fueled by yet unidentified regulators, saying ShapeShifts’s decision to start collection user’s personal information is in response to threats perceived by financial authorities, and that, “in short, this is how regulators silently invade crypto.”

He begins by pointing to the fact that Voorhees is “a true bitcoiner who speaks passionately about financial privacy & separating money from state.” And adds that enforcement agencies rely heavily on financial surveillance, saying that the concept of anonymous cryptocurrency exchanges and transactions is a “nightmare for regulators & investigators.”

One of his Tweet’s read:

“Our financial system is expressly designed to give the government maximum insight into our financial behavior. To that end, most financial institutions have to perform customer due diligence and share information with regulators. We call this “know your customer” (KYC).”

He followed up by saying:

“Now, I’m *not* saying that I think ShapeShift qualifies as a money services business or that it’s legally obligated to perform KYC. But, I *am* guessing that FinCEN (or another agency) has threatened ShapeShift with an enforcement action if it doesn’t start to comply.”

In the end, Chervinsky reiterates that the announcement is not a sign that Voorhees has “sold out,” but instead places blame on regulatory authorities, saying that “[the government’s] fingerprints are all over this decision.” As of yet, no government agencies have made any official statements regarding ShapeShift’s moves.

That, Chervinsky says, “is just how regulation works.” A few hours ago Voorhees tweeted;

To clarify, the Membership program and the FOX token are systems we wanted to build for our users. The imposition of mandatory KYC within that Membership program is not something we want to do, nor something any user wants. It's a heavy decision done to derisk under duress.

— Erik Voorhees (@ErikVoorhees) September 6, 2018

  Image from Shutterstock

The post Lawyer: ShapeShift’s Membership Move Follows “Threats” From Regulators appeared first on NewsBTC.

from Cryptocracken Tumblr https://ift.tt/2CqrQ50 via IFTTT

[brettzjacksonblog]

Lawyer: ShapeShift’s Membership Move Follows “Threats” From Regulators

News came yesterday that the Bitcoin exchange ShapeShift are introducing a new membership initiative — implying that users will have to provide more personal data in order to use the platform’s services.

ShapeShift Announces Membership Program

According to the company’s Tweet, which also contained a link to a more expansive definition of the new terms:

“ShapeShift has big news for our users! We are now offering a new membership program, which will provide users with more benefits & better user experience.”

As of now the registration is optional, but in the future it will become obligatory. The company positions the new initiative as a sort of loyalty program that will offer users additional benefits like favorable exchange rates and rewards for FOX token transactions.

ShapeShift’s CEO Erik Voorhees admits that the compulsory registration is a painful but necessary measure, dictated by the unclear regulatory landscape:

“Yes, that last detail sucks. We would prefer if the collection of personal information were not a mandatory element. We still firmly believe that individuals, regardless of their race, religion, or nationality, deserve the right to financial privacy, just as they deserve the right to privacy in their thoughts, in their relationships, and in their communications. Such privacy is a foundational element of civil and just society and should be defended by all good people. We remain committed to that cause, and it is best served if we are smart about our approach.”

Response in Crypto Community

In response to this news, Washington D.C.-based lawyer Jake Chervinsky stated that the moves have in fact been fueled by yet unidentified regulators, saying ShapeShifts’s decision to start collection user’s personal information is in response to threats perceived by financial authorities, and that, “in short, this is how regulators silently invade crypto.”

He begins by pointing to the fact that Voorhees is “a true bitcoiner who speaks passionately about financial privacy & separating money from state.” And adds that enforcement agencies rely heavily on financial surveillance, saying that the concept of anonymous cryptocurrency exchanges and transactions is a “nightmare for regulators & investigators.”

One of his Tweet’s read:

“Our financial system is expressly designed to give the government maximum insight into our financial behavior. To that end, most financial institutions have to perform customer due diligence and share information with regulators. We call this “know your customer” (KYC).”

He followed up by saying:

“Now, I’m *not* saying that I think ShapeShift qualifies as a money services business or that it’s legally obligated to perform KYC. But, I *am* guessing that FinCEN (or another agency) has threatened ShapeShift with an enforcement action if it doesn’t start to comply.”

In the end, Chervinsky reiterates that the announcement is not a sign that Voorhees has “sold out,” but instead places blame on regulatory authorities, saying that “[the government’s] fingerprints are all over this decision.” As of yet, no government agencies have made any official statements regarding ShapeShift’s moves.

That, Chervinsky says, “is just how regulation works.” A few hours ago Voorhees tweeted;

To clarify, the Membership program and the FOX token are systems we wanted to build for our users. The imposition of mandatory KYC within that Membership program is not something we want to do, nor something any user wants. It's a heavy decision done to derisk under duress.

— Erik Voorhees (@ErikVoorhees) September 6, 2018

  Image from Shutterstock

The post Lawyer: ShapeShift’s Membership Move Follows “Threats” From Regulators appeared first on NewsBTC.

from CryptoCracken SMFeed https://ift.tt/2CqrQ50 via IFTTT

[woodleyagnatanjahj70insuran-blog]

dodge charger insurance 18 year old

dodge charger insurance 18 year old

dodge charger insurance 18 year old

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :insurefinder.xyz

SOURCES:

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dodge charger insurance 18 year old

[pelatro-blog]

14 fascinating digital marketing stats from the past week

See on Scoop.it - Marketing Solutions for Telecom Industry It’s Valentine’s Day on Sunday, and I’ve got the perfect gift idea for you…  No, it’s not something trashy and predictable like a box of chocolates or a diamond necklace. It’s the Econsultancy digital marketing stats round-up. Seriously, I sent the link to my wife last year along with the message 'from Meconsultancy with love', and she didn’t even divorce me. In fact, I was out of the dog house within days without having spent a single penny.  Totally worth it. Thank me later.  This week we’re covering – yep, you guessed it – Valentine’s Day, along with lots of other exciting stats around marketing salaries, digital skills, ad viewability and much more.  Buckle up, this is a good one... Mobile highest-paid digital specialism There’s a very simple way to gauge what the most in-demand skills are, and that’s to find out how much companies are willing to pay for them. That’s exactly what our 2016 career and salary survey aimed to do, and mobile emerged as the top-paid specialism, with mobile-savvy marketers receiving an average basic salary of £49,280.  UX still remains strong. Marketers with this specialism can expect to be paid £48,111 on average.  Gender pay gap still persists There is still a significant gender pay gap in marketing, according to our salary survey.  Male digital specialists enjoy an average salary of £46,378, while their female counterparts only receive £38,176 on average.  The gap is equally wide for general marketers, with males getting paid £45,750 on average vs. just £37,477 for females.  47% say young people can’t apply digital skills at work Almost half of senior decision makers in UK companies say that while young people are digitally savvy they don’t know how to apply those skills in a work situation, according to a recent YouGov poll.  Other key findings include: 84% of respondents agree digital literacy is important in their place of business. 18% believe that not enough young people have the specific digital skills needed for their organisation, rising to 20% in media, marketing and PR and 37% in IT and telecoms. The ability to use the internet for work purposes (87%), staying safe online (87%) and creating basic digital content (84%) were identified as the most sought after when recruiting young people. 80% of shoppers want to collect loyalty points on their phone Eight in ten UK consumers would like to start collecting loyalty points on a retail app, according to new research from Apadmi.  Other key findings include: 29% of shoppers would be happy to share their location with a retail app to gain incentives and loyalty points when they walk around the store. 51% of consumers claim they own more than one loyalty card. 46% say they regularly collect and spend points on a reward card. Only 20% of UK smart phone users currently interact with a retail loyalty scheme on their phone, however. Only 3% of European ad inventory is available at 80%+ campaign viewability goal Ad viewability levels are suffering across Europe, according to new research from Quantcast, which analysed 5bn impressions per month across more than 10,000 publishers for three years.  Other key findings include: An average of 16% of UK inventory not measurable from a viewability perspective. At 75%-100% viewability, inventory is 92% more expensive than RTB average. Half of UK online retailers ignoring Chinese ecommerce While two-thirds of the UK’s largest online retailers are selling internationally, almost half are completely ignoring China’s growing ecommerce market, according to new research from Global-e.  Other key findings include:  Just 26% of retailers present prices in Chinese Yuan. Only 22% of retailers that ship to China offer shoppers the ability to pay using local payment methods. Only one in ten retailers offers a Mandarin-language shopping experience. 98% uplift in conversion rate for flowers in lead-up to Valentine’s Day Perhaps unsurprisingly (definitely unsurprisingly), online conversion rates for flowers increased by almost 100% in the days leading up to Valentine’s Day last year, according to new figures from Ve. But Mother’s Day saw an even bigger uplift in conversions for flowers (138%).  Check out the table below for a breakdown of sectors and their respective conversion rates, split between Valentine’s Day (middle column) and Mother’s Day (right column): 54% of Q4 2015 retail app traffic came from London More than half of all Q4 2015 retail app traffic in the UK came from London, according to a new report by Poq.  Other key findings include: App users in the North East of England generated the highest average order values of the UK, with average order values 126% higher than average. Revenue per user was highest for Scotland-based app users, who were 143% more profitable for retailers than the average app user. The average person shopping from an app generated 2.6x more revenue for a retailer than someone shopping from a mobile site, and 1.5x more than someone using a desktop device. Customers using apps also interacted with retailers 2.8x more often than customers using the mobile website. 57% plan on using Instagram for Valentine’s gift inspiration  More than half of people say they will turn to Instagram to look for ideas on what to buy their significant other for Valentine’s Day, according to new research from Greenlight.  Other key findings include:  41% of Instagram users admit to dropping hints on the social network about what they want to receive. Celebrities posting luxurious presents on their profiles doesn’t influence us as much as we think, with 76% of us valuing our friends and family’s posts the most when searching for what to buy. 35% of younger Instagram users will be influenced by celebrities, however. ‘Actionable emails’ best sent on Friday The best time to send emails that require a decision from the reader is the end of the week, according to a new infographic from My.com. Check out the infographic below for more stats: TV no longer the dominant screen in the living room When it comes to the coveted living room attention span, all screens are increasingly equal, according to new research from Sparkler.  Only 50% of UK online adults now say the TV set is the focal point of their living room, while 70% report they ordinarily use a connected device while watching TV – this rises to 87% of 16-34s.  Multi device activity peaks between 6pm-9pm, and during TV programmes more than one third (34%) check emails, 31% Instant Message or text and 25% shop online. Half will use digital device to research and buy Valentine’s gifts Almost half (49%) of people will do Valentine’s Day gift research on a digital device, with 27% using a smartphone or tablet, according to a new infographic from RadiumOne. Check out the infographic below for more stats: 7 in 10 Valentine’s Day retail searches to be made from a mobile device More than 70% of Valentine’s Day related searches will be made from a mobile in the lead-up to the day, according to new figures from Bing Ads. Other key findings include: More than half of Valentine’s Day searches are expected to be made on the move. Men leave it later to start searching for gifts. The most popular pre-Valentine’s day search times are 11am–2pm on mobile, with a last-minute rush between 7pm-10pm on PCs ‘City breaks’ are the most searched-for romantic getaway. Wedding bells could be ringing with ‘engagement rings’ the most searched-for jewellery category. Valentine’s gift searches grow 195% from 2013-2015 The number of people searching for ‘Valentine’s gifts’ in the run-up to the day increased by almost 200% between 2013 and 2015, according to new research from Connexity.  The research also reveals the top sites cashing in over Valentine’s Day, with the results listed in the table below: Timely and vaguely relevant stat of the week… On this day in 2004, Mattel announced that Barbie and Ken were breaking up.  The dolls had met on the set of their first television commercial together in 1961.  For lots more up-to-date statistics…                                            Download Econsultancy’s Internet Statistics Compendium, a collection of the most recent statistics and market data publicly available on online marketing, ecommerce, the internet and related digital media. It’s updated monthly and covers 11 different topics from advertising, content, customer experience, mobile, ecommerce and social.

[clarencenicholsonata]

8 Venti-Sized Email Marketing Strategies You Can Steal from Starbucks

A couple years ago, I worked at my local Starbucks as a barista. My short tenure there signaled the beginning of my caffeine dependency and my undying loyalty to Seattle’s crown jewel coffeehouse.

Since then, I’ve learned a thing or two about Starbucks, and almost as much about their intensive - and rather brilliant - email marketing strategy. It’s a strategy used to market to tens of millions of Starbucks customers and is a massive focus when it comes to Starbucks’ digital marketing strategy.

In this article, I’ll take a look at 8 specific strategies Starbucks uses in their email marketing, and how you can use them in your business.

So get yourself a grande Pike Place roast, and let’s get started...

Consistency

Starbucks is (as they should be) a company that’s exceptional when it comes to knowing what their target market wants and offering it to them.

Overpriced coffee jokes aside, a Starbucks drink comes with a relatively small price tag when you compare it to higher-commitment purchases like an expensive pair of shoes or a watch. Starbucks’ marketing team knows it’s not necessary to create a long nurturing email drip campaign to sell coffee.

On the contrary, Starbucks knows their patrons are rarely one-time customers. Dedicated Starbucks customers buy often, even coming in more than once a day for their caffeine fix.

To capitalize on this, Starbucks frequently sends promotions. They send emails at least once every two or three days, each with a different type of promotion or the occasional piece of content (more on what’s in their emails later in the article).

Doing this serves to keep Starbucks top-of-mind - even if a subscriber doesn’t open an email, the push notification they receive might be the reason they take a pumpkin spice latte detour on their way to work.

Expert Typography

As a designer, the feature that really stands out to me in Starbucks email is the way they look. If nothing else, they’re absolutely beautiful.

The email marketing team behind Starbucks uses a bunch of tricks to make their emails eye-catching and visually appealing, so I’ve split these tricks up into a few different points.

First, let’s talk typography. Let me guess - you probably go through email after email in your inbox seeing the same thing: line upon line of black, 14px Arial. Though this makes sense for day-to-day emails, it’s not well suited for email marketing.

Check out this Starbucks email:

The typography is beautiful and clean - not at all representative of what you traditionally see in even good email newsletters. Their designers are experienced, and this shows in their expert use of space and sizing to maximize the effect of email copy.

But there’s more! If we look under the hood, we can see they’ve used some light HTML to make their text look as good as possible. In particular, they’ve specified a specific font face that’s on-brand, and included fallbacks so you really only see Helvetica or Arial if none of the first-choice fonts are somewhere on your computer.

On top of this, they’ve picked a nice shade of grey for their text. Though it might not seem like a big departure from standard black, grey text is much softer on the eyes.

If you’re looking to do these things, I’m including the HTML below. I will mention, however, that you’re best off picking relatively common fonts (like Starbucks did) - otherwise, your viewers will likely end up seeing Helvetica after all.

<div style="font-family:Avenir,'Roboto',Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:22px;line-height:33px;color:#333333”> Your text goes here</div>

Just change the fonts, color, font size, and line height as necessary (though I’ve given you a pretty good starting point).

Spectacular Images

Probably the most noticeable feature of a Starbucks email is the fantastic imagery. Every email features at least one beautiful photo of a Starbucks product.

On the surface, there’s not much to dissect here - images are great, eye-catching (in Starbucks’ case, mouth-watering) and help to provide context to the rest of the email.

However, there’s a special quality about Starbucks images that serve to elevate them, making them just that little bit more engaging. Let’s peer into the pastry case...

Professional Photography

If you’re a company like Starbucks, you definitely have the resources to put together a professional photo shoot whenever you want. All of Starbucks’ images are beautifully laid out, amazingly lit, and brilliantly shot.

Though you might not have the resources to take amazing photos whenever you want, invest some time (and maybe some money) into putting together an extensive photo shoot featuring all of your products in multiple angles and settings.

Having a library of material to pull from whenever you need an image for your email is incredibly handy, and having a single large product shoot (as opposed to multiple smaller ones) can help keep costs low. In most cases, even photos taken with a newer smartphone can pass for professional (just set them up well).

Added Typography

Starbucks always starts the body of their emails off with an image. And nearly every single time, they actually put their headline in the hero image itself.

This does multiple things. First, it lets Starbucks have complete control over the positioning of the text and allows them to do more creative things with placement, as you can see in the example below.

Plus, it gives them the ability to go crazy with typography. Though body copy should remain relatively simple stylistically, hero or headline text is your business’ opportunity to go a bit crazy. Check out these amazingly creative examples:

You can use Photoshop or a more noob-friendly tool like Canva to add some text to your image. Make it big and bold, and don’t be afraid to get creative.

Animations

Finally, Starbucks occasionally adds a GIF into their emails, adding an animated component to an often-static medium. They use it in a few different ways, most recently to show off the different variations of their Christmas cups:

Again, you can use Photoshop to put together a simple GIF. Don’t make it too complicated or animated, as this will send your file size through the roof.

Engaging Layouts

Last on our list of design do’s is an engaging layout. Starbucks’ particular attention to typography and their rather strict aversion to overwhelming amounts of copy means they’ve got a lot of room to play with when it comes to layout.

Emails often aren’t very flexible, even when you use a WYSIWYG editor. Starbucks works around this by using images abundantly, allowing them to arrange things exactly the way they want. Check out this email excerpt:

In the email above, each row of content (including text) is simply an image, which allows Starbucks to get more creative with a medium that isn’t usually very customizable.

You can do this yourself by using a tool like Photoshop to build your entire email. Export it in full-width rows based on your desired layout and content within the email.

This is a great strategy, but remember an all-image email will take a bit of a toll on your readers’ bandwidth, so use text where you can.

Strategic Gamification

This is partially a commentary on Starbucks’ entire mobile strategy, but it’s linked closely enough to their email marketing strategy that I’d like to talk about it.

In case you haven’t used the Starbucks app, I’ll try explain how it works. Every purchase you make with the Starbucks app counts for a certain number of stars and every 125 stars earned gets you one free food or drink item.

Spending 5 dollars a day on your quad venti soy half-sweet no-whip extra foam mocha can add up, so it’s always nice to get a freebie every so often. Starbucks knows that too, which is why they put a lot of focus on earning bonus stars in their email marketing.

Here’s an example of an email promoting a new product:

As you can see, the body of the email revolves entirely around earning extra stars. It’s a clear call to action - buy these items, earn these stars.

This is brilliant.

Most companies make use of special discounts or limited-use coupons to drive sales, but Starbucks knows they’ll actually make more money overall with Stars. Instead of giving customers a discount right off the bat, they require them to make other purchases first. This ensures sales in exchange for the offer, unlike coupons or other discounts.

Starbucks also runs other short-term promotions to cater to people who don’t normally go out of their way to earn more stars. For example, they offer bonus stars on certain items, or have Double Star Days, where people can earn more stars based on their purchases. Doing this keeps the “game” more exciting, leading to more sales.

You can do this for your business with a customer loyalty app (TapMango and Kangaroo Rewards come to mind), or even build a simple customer loyalty program using your marketing automation platform, sending specific rewards based on purchase volume, frequency, etc.

Themed Promotions

One strategy that’s been talked about time and time again by digital marketing gurus (including all of us here on the Wishpond blog) is to capitalize on holidays and seasons to give your marketing promotions a more cohesive theme.

Starbucks makes sure to take this strategy to the extreme. Because even their products change from season to season, it’s easy for Starbucks to put together promotions that fit the time of year.

To take advantage of the Halloween season, Starbucks released a special Zombie Frappuccino - a sweet, blended beverage modeled after our favorite undead creature.

To promote it to their email subscribers, they put together an amazing email. In this case, the email’s design was a departure from the usual. Though it’s important to be on brand, use special occasions like Halloween or the holiday season to get creative with your visual design.

The body of the email is great as well, highlighting the product’s key features (with some creative visual cues) in a clever, thematically-relevant manner.

Best of all? The promotion was available for a limited time, which served to create urgency and push more subscribers to try it out.

Consider capitalizing on specific events or times of year when putting together your marketing campaigns. You might want to run a Christmas-themed giveaway for the holiday season, or celebrate the Super Bowl with a promotion.

These kinds of promotions work well because they’re topical - there’s a certain friction that’s eliminated when you show potential customers the things that are already on their mind.

Subject Lines, Subject Lines, Subject Lines

Subject lines are at least as important as the body of your email and the offer or ask within it.

This might be a weird notion if you’re new to email marketing and when you consider the relative size of a subject line compared to the email itself. Nonetheless, the subject line is probably 90% of a subscriber’s decision-making process when it comes to deciding whether or not to open an email - and your open rate is huge when it comes to the conversion rate of your entire email marketing funnel.

It follows, then, that Starbucks’ expert email marketing team also knocks it out of the park pretty much every time with their subject lines. There’s a couple of things they do to make their subject lines especially prone to high open rates.

Let’s take a closer look.

Length

Here’s a screenshot I took of all the Starbucks emails in my inbox.

Notice a trend? All of these subject lines (with the exception of those with French, because Canada) are incredibly short, which serves two distinct purposes.

First, they’re easy to digest. Though a detailed subject line might look great in theory, once it’s just 1 of 100 unopened emails, many of your subscribers might not even bother reading it.

Second, they’re designed for mobile. Litmus found that 53% of emails were opened on mobile. And that was three years ago - I’m willing to bet the number is much, much higher now. Having short subject lines means subscribers can see the whole thing within a push notification, without needing to click.

Keep your subject lines short where possible - it’s also a great exercise in making sure they say only what they need to. Keep in mind this doesn’t mean they need to be void of personality - Starbucks knows when to be more playful with their subject lines.

Conveying value

Starbucks also does an excellent job using subject lines to communicate the value of the offer within. Here’s a few examples:

Tomorrow: Double Star Day

Order ahead for 2x Stars

Pick up lunch for $5

In each of these subject lines, the message is clear.

Keeping the value clear in your subject lines lets your subscribers understand immediately what the email will contain, setting expectations and piquing their interests. For a promotion, your offer is the most important part of your email - why shouldn’t it be in your subject line, too?

Bonus: Post-subject line copy

Here’s a neat little trick Starbucks uses, which helps to provide context while keeping subject lines short and optimized for mobile:

Starbucks puts a short sub-headline at the header of their emails, above the hero image. This subheadline serves to expand on the subject line without adding to its length.

And here’s how it looks in the email (nice and subtle):

Why not just put this subheadline in the subject line itself? Like I mentioned previously, Starbucks’ email marketing strategy is mobile-centric. A longer subject line might not fit on a smartphone display, whereas body copy tends to show up underneath the subject line.

This way, the notification displays the subject line and subheadline as intended. Pretty cool.

Personalized marketing

This is the final piece of the email marketing puzzle, and it’s a huge part of Starbucks’ strategy.

Having your subscribers’ email addresses gives you the unique ability to track their activity and personalize your marketing to match.

Starbucks uses their customer loyalty program (which is tied to the Starbucks app and its customers’ Starbucks cards) to gather information about each user’s purchase habits. This information allows them to send users personalized offers.

Let’s take a look at a specific example. I visit Starbucks one or two times a week, but I tend to purchase only a few staple items. Most of the time, I’ll order an iced Americano or a turkey-bacon breakfast sandwich.

Imagine my surprise when I got this email:

Starbucks used my purchase data to put together a specialized promotion just for me, offering 125 bonus stars to me if I were to buy the items listed in the email. You’ll notice two out of the three items were my regular buys, making this “Star Dash” seem pretty simple to complete.

Smartly, Starbucks tends to make the third item in these dashes a Frappuccino, which is a pricier product. This helps drive sales on products with higher markups.

Starbucks also uses urgency in these dashes - this one below offers bonus stars if I purchase my favorite items several times over a few days. This promotion serves a different purpose: increasing my purchasing frequency.

To me, this is a prime use of marketing automation, and just a glimpse into the power it can bring to your business.

Try using marketing automation to personalize your own marketing. It doesn’t even need to be as targeted as the examples above - just using it to segment your customers based on pages they’ve visited or products they’ve purchased can help you create marketing campaigns that are more specific to subsets of your target market.

Personalized email marketing campaigns are powerful in their ability to be more relevant to the people who see them, which is sure to increase your conversion rate.

Conclusion

Whew! I know that might be a lot to take in, but trust me - there’s a lot to learn from Starbucks’ email marketing strategy. Whether that’s honing in on effective subject lines or using marketing automation to power up your email strategy, there’s definitely things you can take away to use for your own business.

Any questions? Let me know in the comments below!

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Transcript of How to Cut Through the Noise and Clutter in Marketing Today

Transcript of How to Cut Through the Noise and Clutter in Marketing Today

Transcript of How to Cut Through the Noise and Clutter in Marketing Today written by John Jantsch read more at Duct Tape Marketing

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John Jantsch: So how do you cut through all the noise and clutter in the marketing world today? Maybe you start by unbranding. In this episode of the Duct Tape Marketing Podcast, I get to visit with Alison Stratten, the co-author of a new book called Unbranding, a book she wrote with her husband. They are also work partners. Don’t know how you do that, but we talk about that on this show as well. Not that much has changed in marketing, and I think that’s the real point of the idea of unbranding. There are certain tools and techniques that people have adopted today, but what has always been true is it’s about the customer experience. Check out this episode of the Duct Tape Marketing Podcast.

Hello, and welcome to another episode of the Duct Tape Marketing Podcast. This is John Jantsch, and my guest today is Alison Stratten. She is a co-author of four best-selling business books, co-owner of an organization called UnMarketing, and co-host of a podcast called UnPodcast. But today, we’re going to talk about a new book called UnBranding. Alison, thanks for joining me.

Alison Stratten: Thank you for having me. I think there’s a trend. You’re seeing an un trend. Did you feel funny when you were saying all of those words?

John Jantsch: No, not at all. Not at all. But I’m sure that, again, like all good unbranding, that un thing has really kind of stuck with you guys, hasn’t it?

Alison Stratten: Yeah. It’s working for us, so we’re going to keep going with it. Yeah, UnBranding is the newest book. Hopefully soon it’ll be five best-selling books. We’re hoping. We’re really excited about it. It’s a little bit different than the other ones, but still the un. The un remains.

John Jantsch: Yeah. I always like to, especially when you have series … I had David Meerman Scott on recently, and talking about actually I think it’s like the eighth revision of his very, very popular book, The New Rules. I always like to ask authors kind of, what new ground are you breaking here? What kind of addition to the world of branding and marketing books do you think you want UnBranding to add?

Alison Stratten: Well, we kind of see the books as like a progression. Three of the books, not all the books, but UnMarketing, UnSelling, and UnBranding we kind of see as a progression, not only through time, because obviously when you write about marketing and branding today, everything changes with new technologies and the growth of social media. When we wrote UnMarketing, that was in 2009, and so things were different. I mean, there was different things we were worried about. There were different things we were focusing on in marketing. Although our basic message hasn’t changed, still we like to update things and talk about things. Actually the last book we wrote before this one was the second edition of UnMarketing, mostly because we were tired of having to answer questions about something that we’d written in 2009 when so much in the landscape had changed. I’m not sure that it’s so new as it is kind of a progression.

Also, we spend so much time, like we just live and breathe all these case studies, constantly reading about different brands and what they’re doing, and stories, and consumer advocacy stories. That’s kind of what our whole world is about. Once you’ve kind of read all of these stories and you’re learning all the time, you just have new stories that you want to share, new lessons that you want to share with people as well. I think that’s what UnBranding is really about. It’s kind of the progression through those three books into kind of what was see today with what’s going on in marketing and branding.

John Jantsch: Yeah. I really love the kind of quick hits on companies that you interviewed, or you at least observed what they were doing. But you know, before we get into any of that, I’ve been doing this a long time, and I still find myself saying, “Has anything really changed?”

Alison Stratten: Well, I mean, it’s funny. Kind of the main focus of the book is the age of disruption, and what do you do as an entrepreneur, as a business owner, as an employee with all of these new things kind of coming at us, where it feels like the ground underneath us is constantly shifting? What we’ve found through all of these lessons and all of these stories that we’ve read is really that it’s about loyalty, that that’s the anecdote to all of this change constantly happening around us is focusing on building loyalty, and we kind of go through different ways to do that. That’s an old lesson. I mean, that’s not a new lesson in business by any means.

But when you have all these tools at your disposal, and some of them are really bright and shiny and cool, or some of them are kind of age-old tools that you’ve just maybe been using incorrectly for a really long time, focusing on those kind of old tenets of why we do business with people, although maybe it shouldn’t be, is kind of new. Even though it’s an old lesson, we’ve been so focused on chasing after whatever’s cool and whatever’s new. It is kind of new again to say like, “No, we’re going to go back to why people buy our products, providing great products and service.” I guess it isn’t really new, but it’s something new to focus on, I think, because a lot of people have taken their focus off of it.

John Jantsch: Well, and I tell you, the last year or so I’ve been preaching that I think everything, or at least we’re rewarded as marketers for focusing on customer experience, at really the expense of everything else. I mean, I even see I think Google is rewarding people. If you’ve got bad data, if you’ve got bad directions, if your website doesn’t load, those are all bad customer experiences, and I think that Google’s even rewarding and penalizing companies that aren’t focused on that.

Alison Stratten: Absolutely, because things travel, things are shared, and when you provide a good experience with a solid product or a solid service, when you treat your customers well, when you treat your employees well, which is hugely connected to treating your customers well, you end up with stories that people want to share, good stories. We have so many options now. There’s so much information, and it’s a focus on those good experiences that is then shared by people, and bring new people to our doors, and keep our current customers happy and coming back.

John Jantsch: It’s funny, I’m-

Siri: Did you accidentally summon me?

Alison Stratten: Oh my goodness. Siri decided it wanted to be a part of our interview.

John Jantsch: That’s aw-

Alison Stratten: Going to turn that off. I’m sorry, John.

John Jantsch: That’s awesome.

Alison Stratten: Siri says that you’re doing a great job. Okay.

John Jantsch: Thank you. I’m kind of an old fart, and so I’ll tolerate a lot. There’s this French restaurant that we go to that I don’t know where they find these servers. I really don’t. They’re like your typical cliché French restaurant experience: aloof, and just could care less if you’re there or not. But I love going there. I love this place, and so I tolerate it. But boy, my kids, who are in their upper 20s and lower 30s now, if something doesn’t work the way they think it should work, they are gone. I don’t know if that’s a generational thing or not, but I think that that’s something that a lot of organizations don’t understand.

Alison Stratten: It could be, although it’s also probably part of loyalty is you’ve been going to that restaurant for a while so you have a comfort feeling with the restaurant. Maybe even part of the comfort is that the waiters kind of irritate you. But you’ve had that experience a bunch of times, so they’ve built some kind of relationship with you. Even if it’s not a perfect relationship, they have made a connection with you in one way or another, and you know what to expect when you go, which is a huge part of loyalty, right? Even if part of what you know to expect is that that particular person is going to be rude or that your food might take a while, still knowing what you’re going to expect sometimes is better than trying a new place where you don’t know what you’re going to expect, right?

John Jantsch: Yeah. Yeah.

Alison Stratten: I think what you may see is that we have so many choices. One of our things when we travel is do you try a new restaurant, or do you go to the place where you know exactly what you’re going to get? Because we have just this plethora of choices at our fingertips, sometimes it is nice to go back to that place that you’ve been many times. I don’t know if it’s a generation thing, or it’s just that whatever it is with that restaurant, they haven’t been able to connect with your kids or that generation yet maybe.

John Jantsch: Well, I’m halfway being facetious, because I would actually contend that that is their brand, right?

Alison Stratten: Well, some people it works.

John Jantsch: They are staying true to it, and they attract a certain audience who thinks it’s quaint somehow. Yeah, I totally agree. I’ve written five, I’m working on number six book myself. I’ve done them all myself, holed up in a writing cabin or in a coffee shop. You have actually had co-authors, or a co-author.

Alison Stratten: Well, Scott.

John Jantsch: I should say, a co-author.

Alison Stratten: Yeah, I co-authored.

John Jantsch: Yeah, on your books. I wondered, how does that work from a role standpoint? Do you take certain roles? Do you just kind of write and then improve each other’s writing? How do you break it up?

Alison Stratten: Well, it’s kind of grown over the years because we’ve written all the books together. I think it’s just kind of has developed for sure. It started out with Scott doing the talking. He would talk, and/or I would see his keynotes, or just things that he was sharing online and seeing that were resonating with people online, and then we took those stories, and at the time, some blog posts and things that he’d written, and then I kind of did the meat, right? We have a funny story where he runs in the room in our house and he said like one word to me. Like you run, run, run, run downstairs … I can’t even remember what the word was. I wish I could. But imagine running downstairs and he yelled like, “Pizza!” and then he went running away. That was the thing, and I took “pizza,” or whatever the word was, and I can write a chapter out of that. Our process is he’s great with hooks, and he’s great with ideas, and he’s brilliant at seeing things in a different way than I might see them. Then I’m really good a research, and I’m really good at writing to explain things to people, and to take these kind of tidbit hooks and turn them into a book. It’s not the same skill. It works really well for us.

As the years have passed and we’ve written more and more together, for this book, I really took our podcast … I took the recordings of our podcast where we had had discussions about different stories and different brands, and I took those conversations and I made them into a book. Then we bounce ideas off each other, but I do the bulk of the writing. Then Scott will look at it, and he’ll change things, and he’ll add something, or he might have an idea of a certain way to express something that I hadn’t thought of, and so he’ll put that in. That’s kind of how we work together.

I would say I do the bulk of the writing. I always have. But even more as the years have gone on and the books have gone on, I do even more of the writing, and Scott kind of shapes the ideas and has kind of the vision for what he wants in the book. We sort of work that way. Then he does revisions. Some of it is written. Like some things he’ll write let’s say as a blog post, and then we’ll take that and then we’ll turn it into a chapter, which is kind of tweaking it a bit and making it part of the concept of the book. That’s how we work. We save ideas back and forth to each other. We have for years. Like if we see an article that we like, we’ll save it to a certain file and then we’ll send it to each other. Then if that makes it onto the podcast, we record the podcasts. Then I had a file of probably like 200 stories that we talked about on the podcast, and I go through all of those, and then picked 100 stories that we wanted to include in the book.

John Jantsch: Now, you know what I love about that, and I’ve done some form of that over the years too, is when you kind of have that intention for the podcast a little bit, and maybe that was not the intention, but it brings intention to the podcast knowing that it’s also something much bigger.

Alison Stratten: Yeah. It wasn’t the intention when we started the podcast, but what happened was that we had already written UnMarketing when we started the podcast, and I think we had already written The Book of Business Awesome and QR Codes Kill Kittens. Then when I was writing on selling, we had started the podcast. I was doing research and thinking about things we talked about, going through my list of all the different articles that Scott and I have sent back and forth to each other during the six months since writing the last book. I was like, “Oh my goodness. I have actual discussions, like what we both thought about this particular issue, and interviews and we’ve done, and all this content. Why am I reinventing the wheel when I can go and listen to what we said about it?” Yeah, I just went and listened and realized, “Oh my goodness. This is like the best resource.” When it came to writing UnBranding, that’s where I stated. I just started with the last podcast after content that was included in UnSelling and kind of started there and went forward. It was awesome, especially because we ended up doing this kind of idea of 100 brand stories, right?

John Jantsch: Yeah.

Alison Stratten: That’s a lot of stories. The podcast made it so accessible to go through and figure out which ones we wanted to use, and which had been kind of the most … It’s just which ones people had reacted to the most, and which ones we had the best conversations about, because we don’t always agree about things on the podcast. Sometimes those are the best experiences, right?

John Jantsch: Yeah.

Alison Stratten:  Why don’t we agree? Either as consumers or as marketers, why don’t we agree on what’s happening here? Yeah, it was great. It’s wonderful for content.

John Jantsch: Yeah. The book literally wrote itself.

Alison Stratten: No. That’s what Scott … Scott loves to say, “Oh, it’s so easy.” He once said to an audience when I happened to be there, he’s like, “Oh, the hardest part is selling the book.” I just looked at him like, “No, the hardest part is not selling the book.”

John Jantsch: So you led right into really my next question. Do you ever have strong opinions, Alison?

Alison Stratten: Oh, I have very strong opinions, of course.

John Jantsch: How do you get those heard, because Scott’s pretty big and loud too?

Alison Stratten: No, we actually work really well together. It’s one of the things that I love about writing together and our podcast together. I think of all the things we do together, working together is really up there. We work really well together. We have a good respect for each other in terms of what we think about things and what we can do. Starting the podcast especially was intimidating because Scott is so seasoned at being a speaker, and also being on camera and recording, and I was really a rookie. I’ve learned a lot from him about how to do that, and how to prepare for it and what’s expected. Yeah, I don’t have a lot of trouble getting my opinions heard. I might be the only person, but I don’t have any problem getting Scott to listen to my opinions.

John Jantsch: Well, it does sound like you have a great working relationship. I don’t think my wife and I could work very well together. We’ve been married 30 plus years, and we’re just now getting to the point where we can actually cook together. It’s really just because I approach everything so differently than she does, and vice versa. I can’t imagine working together, but I love hanging out with her. How’s that?

Alison Stratten: I think that’s partially part of the writ … You asked about the writing. I have heard about people who work with co-authors and they each write chapters and they share them and stuff. That would be really hard for me because I definitely have a certain way that I like to write and a certain process that I have. It would be really hard for me to work with a co-author was was really in the chapters when I was working on them. Does that make sense?

John Jantsch: Oh, absolutely. Absolutely.

Alison Stratten: Scott and I kind of frame out all the ideas together, and he brings a lot of that. Then I write, and then he reads what I’ve written and then we change things from there. But I would have a really hard time if like every time I opened up a document, there was a new paragraph in there. I’d probably lose my mind. It works for us.

John Jantsch: Let’s talk about some of the specifics of the book.

Alison Stratten: Sure.

John Jantsch: One of the questions I hear all the time, and I’m sure you guys are getting this a lot too, is people look at brands like ours and they think, “Oh, I’m just getting started though, and you’ve been blogging for this, or you’ve been doing this all this time. How do I now …” Because when I started blogging, there were 10 of us maybe, you know?

Alison Stratten: Yeah.

John Jantsch: … in the marketing space. How do you now figure out how to cut through what I think is such a noisy landscape?

Alison Stratten: I think actually the more research we do, and the more people we talk to, and the more stories that we hear, it’s actually the people doing the same things that people were doing that made them successful all along are the things that make people successful now. It’s just that there’s kind of this megaphone around things that they can go spread to so many people. I think that the tried and true ideals of taking care of your customers, solving a problem, and providing good service, working as honestly as you can, supporting your workers, supporting your employees, being a good employee, and being a good co-worker, those things are still tried and true. I do agree, like when we started out in social media, if you were kind of a early adopter, you definitely had an advantage, of course. I often feel badly for somebody who thinks jumping into Twitter today is going to be like it was in 2008 or 2009. It’s not, but at the same time, what makes people share things is exactly the same thing as what’s always made people share things. The focus shouldn’t be on the pushing that spread or trying to achieve this pretend goal of reaching a million people you’re never going to meet anyway. It should be about making something that you’re proud of, creating something you’re proud of, and then that’s when your job is done, and seeing it go out into the world.

That’s how I look at the books. For me, I’m kind of like I’m not the person who follows every number and sees every sale and reads everything that comes back review-wise. I’m kind of the person who believes I did my best, and I sent it out into the world. Then other than taking care of customers or answering questions, I feel like that’s my job as an author. I know not everybody sees it that way, but I think it’s the same for business. Many of the stories that we read were simple stories about people with great products that found their community in a really natural, organic kind of way. They didn’t use tricks, and they didn’t game the system. They just worked at it. Nobody wants that answer. Everyone wants to think, “Well, you just put this on your site and it’ll go crazy,” but that doesn’t seem to be the case, at least not from the stories that we’re reading.

John Jantsch: Well, and I think that that does cause some people to jump into tools and technologies and platforms, because they want to catch the next Twitter. I think, boy, that if there ever was a bad reason for doing something, that’s probably it.

Alison Stratten: Yeah. I think so too. Also, we only have so much attention. I know a lot of the people that we talk to are in the entrepreneurial space, but it’s the same if you work for a company or if you own large company, whatever you do. It’s about focus, right? You only have so much attention during the day. You only have so many resources financially and with time and energy, and so if you’re going to put so much focus on chasing what the next Twitter is going to be with the chance that you might be the person who gets in first, you’re taking that attention away from something else. Something’s going to give, and so you need to decide. You always need to ask yourself, “Why?” right?

John Jantsch: Mm-hmm (affirmative).

Alison Stratten: When we did QR Codes Kill Kittens, it’s funny and we were kind of joking, but we were also seriously saying like, “This is a technology that people are using just because they want to use a technology. If you don’t ask yourself, ‘Why?’ and then, ‘How?'” … Very important … “then you’re just doing it for no reason, and it’s going to hurt you instead of help you.”

John Jantsch: I have contended for a long time that after awareness … I mean, people have to know you exist if you’re going to have any hope of turning them into a customer … trust, I think, is like the number one objective after somebody knows you. What did you find in talking to these companies? Is there a common sort of thread on how people build trust? Because that’s one of those things that people tell you, “Be trustworthy,” but how do you make that happens?

Alison Stratten: What exactly does that mean? Yeah. I think that actually a lot of the stories and companies that we looked at built a lot of trust through how they handled mistakes, how they handled negative things happening. We have a story about a company that was a really small company. They sold jewelry, and they had gotten, I can’t remember exactly the number, but let’s say 120 orders coming into the holiday season. They’d shipped them all off, put them in envelopes, all set. That was I think their second or third year in business. Big year, right, for a small company just getting started?

John Jantsch: Mm-hmm (affirmative).

Alison Stratten: They weren’t in Oprah Magazine or anything, just a little company. Then they got a call the next day from the post office that the mailbox that they shipped all of their packages in had actually caught on fire. I mean, terrible, right?

John Jantsch: Oh my.

Alison Stratten: They went through terrible experience with the post office. It was in the U.K., a terrible experience with the post office...

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Transcript of How to Cut Through the Noise and Clutter in Marketing Today

Transcript of How to Cut Through the Noise and Clutter in Marketing Today

Transcript of How to Cut Through the Noise and Clutter in Marketing Today written by John Jantsch read more at Duct Tape Marketing

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John Jantsch: So how do you cut through all the noise and clutter in the marketing world today? Maybe you start by unbranding. In this episode of the Duct Tape Marketing Podcast, I get to visit with Alison Stratten, the co-author of a new book called Unbranding, a book she wrote with her husband. They are also work partners. Don’t know how you do that, but we talk about that on this show as well. Not that much has changed in marketing, and I think that’s the real point of the idea of unbranding. There are certain tools and techniques that people have adopted today, but what has always been true is it’s about the customer experience. Check out this episode of the Duct Tape Marketing Podcast.

Hello, and welcome to another episode of the Duct Tape Marketing Podcast. This is John Jantsch, and my guest today is Alison Stratten. She is a co-author of four best-selling business books, co-owner of an organization called UnMarketing, and co-host of a podcast called UnPodcast. But today, we’re going to talk about a new book called UnBranding. Alison, thanks for joining me.

Alison Stratten: Thank you for having me. I think there’s a trend. You’re seeing an un trend. Did you feel funny when you were saying all of those words?

John Jantsch: No, not at all. Not at all. But I’m sure that, again, like all good unbranding, that un thing has really kind of stuck with you guys, hasn’t it?

Alison Stratten: Yeah. It’s working for us, so we’re going to keep going with it. Yeah, UnBranding is the newest book. Hopefully soon it’ll be five best-selling books. We’re hoping. We’re really excited about it. It’s a little bit different than the other ones, but still the un. The un remains.

John Jantsch: Yeah. I always like to, especially when you have series … I had David Meerman Scott on recently, and talking about actually I think it’s like the eighth revision of his very, very popular book, The New Rules. I always like to ask authors kind of, what new ground are you breaking here? What kind of addition to the world of branding and marketing books do you think you want UnBranding to add?

Alison Stratten: Well, we kind of see the books as like a progression. Three of the books, not all the books, but UnMarketing, UnSelling, and UnBranding we kind of see as a progression, not only through time, because obviously when you write about marketing and branding today, everything changes with new technologies and the growth of social media. When we wrote UnMarketing, that was in 2009, and so things were different. I mean, there was different things we were worried about. There were different things we were focusing on in marketing. Although our basic message hasn’t changed, still we like to update things and talk about things. Actually the last book we wrote before this one was the second edition of UnMarketing, mostly because we were tired of having to answer questions about something that we’d written in 2009 when so much in the landscape had changed. I’m not sure that it’s so new as it is kind of a progression.

Also, we spend so much time, like we just live and breathe all these case studies, constantly reading about different brands and what they’re doing, and stories, and consumer advocacy stories. That’s kind of what our whole world is about. Once you’ve kind of read all of these stories and you’re learning all the time, you just have new stories that you want to share, new lessons that you want to share with people as well. I think that’s what UnBranding is really about. It’s kind of the progression through those three books into kind of what was see today with what’s going on in marketing and branding.

John Jantsch: Yeah. I really love the kind of quick hits on companies that you interviewed, or you at least observed what they were doing. But you know, before we get into any of that, I’ve been doing this a long time, and I still find myself saying, “Has anything really changed?”

Alison Stratten: Well, I mean, it’s funny. Kind of the main focus of the book is the age of disruption, and what do you do as an entrepreneur, as a business owner, as an employee with all of these new things kind of coming at us, where it feels like the ground underneath us is constantly shifting? What we’ve found through all of these lessons and all of these stories that we’ve read is really that it’s about loyalty, that that’s the anecdote to all of this change constantly happening around us is focusing on building loyalty, and we kind of go through different ways to do that. That’s an old lesson. I mean, that’s not a new lesson in business by any means.

But when you have all these tools at your disposal, and some of them are really bright and shiny and cool, or some of them are kind of age-old tools that you’ve just maybe been using incorrectly for a really long time, focusing on those kind of old tenets of why we do business with people, although maybe it shouldn’t be, is kind of new. Even though it’s an old lesson, we’ve been so focused on chasing after whatever’s cool and whatever’s new. It is kind of new again to say like, “No, we’re going to go back to why people buy our products, providing great products and service.” I guess it isn’t really new, but it’s something new to focus on, I think, because a lot of people have taken their focus off of it.

John Jantsch: Well, and I tell you, the last year or so I’ve been preaching that I think everything, or at least we’re rewarded as marketers for focusing on customer experience, at really the expense of everything else. I mean, I even see I think Google is rewarding people. If you’ve got bad data, if you’ve got bad directions, if your website doesn’t load, those are all bad customer experiences, and I think that Google’s even rewarding and penalizing companies that aren’t focused on that.

Alison Stratten: Absolutely, because things travel, things are shared, and when you provide a good experience with a solid product or a solid service, when you treat your customers well, when you treat your employees well, which is hugely connected to treating your customers well, you end up with stories that people want to share, good stories. We have so many options now. There’s so much information, and it’s a focus on those good experiences that is then shared by people, and bring new people to our doors, and keep our current customers happy and coming back.

John Jantsch: It’s funny, I’m-

Siri: Did you accidentally summon me?

Alison Stratten: Oh my goodness. Siri decided it wanted to be a part of our interview.

John Jantsch: That’s aw-

Alison Stratten: Going to turn that off. I’m sorry, John.

John Jantsch: That’s awesome.

Alison Stratten: Siri says that you’re doing a great job. Okay.

John Jantsch: Thank you. I’m kind of an old fart, and so I’ll tolerate a lot. There’s this French restaurant that we go to that I don’t know where they find these servers. I really don’t. They’re like your typical cliché French restaurant experience: aloof, and just could care less if you’re there or not. But I love going there. I love this place, and so I tolerate it. But boy, my kids, who are in their upper 20s and lower 30s now, if something doesn’t work the way they think it should work, they are gone. I don’t know if that’s a generational thing or not, but I think that that’s something that a lot of organizations don’t understand.

Alison Stratten: It could be, although it’s also probably part of loyalty is you’ve been going to that restaurant for a while so you have a comfort feeling with the restaurant. Maybe even part of the comfort is that the waiters kind of irritate you. But you’ve had that experience a bunch of times, so they’ve built some kind of relationship with you. Even if it’s not a perfect relationship, they have made a connection with you in one way or another, and you know what to expect when you go, which is a huge part of loyalty, right? Even if part of what you know to expect is that that particular person is going to be rude or that your food might take a while, still knowing what you’re going to expect sometimes is better than trying a new place where you don’t know what you’re going to expect, right?

John Jantsch: Yeah. Yeah.

Alison Stratten: I think what you may see is that we have so many choices. One of our things when we travel is do you try a new restaurant, or do you go to the place where you know exactly what you’re going to get? Because we have just this plethora of choices at our fingertips, sometimes it is nice to go back to that place that you’ve been many times. I don’t know if it’s a generation thing, or it’s just that whatever it is with that restaurant, they haven’t been able to connect with your kids or that generation yet maybe.

John Jantsch: Well, I’m halfway being facetious, because I would actually contend that that is their brand, right?

Alison Stratten: Well, some people it works.

John Jantsch: They are staying true to it, and they attract a certain audience who thinks it’s quaint somehow. Yeah, I totally agree. I’ve written five, I’m working on number six book myself. I’ve done them all myself, holed up in a writing cabin or in a coffee shop. You have actually had co-authors, or a co-author.

Alison Stratten: Well, Scott.

John Jantsch: I should say, a co-author.

Alison Stratten: Yeah, I co-authored.

John Jantsch: Yeah, on your books. I wondered, how does that work from a role standpoint? Do you take certain roles? Do you just kind of write and then improve each other’s writing? How do you break it up?

Alison Stratten: Well, it’s kind of grown over the years because we’ve written all the books together. I think it’s just kind of has developed for sure. It started out with Scott doing the talking. He would talk, and/or I would see his keynotes, or just things that he was sharing online and seeing that were resonating with people online, and then we took those stories, and at the time, some blog posts and things that he’d written, and then I kind of did the meat, right? We have a funny story where he runs in the room in our house and he said like one word to me. Like you run, run, run, run downstairs … I can’t even remember what the word was. I wish I could. But imagine running downstairs and he yelled like, “Pizza!” and then he went running away. That was the thing, and I took “pizza,” or whatever the word was, and I can write a chapter out of that. Our process is he’s great with hooks, and he’s great with ideas, and he’s brilliant at seeing things in a different way than I might see them. Then I’m really good a research, and I’m really good at writing to explain things to people, and to take these kind of tidbit hooks and turn them into a book. It’s not the same skill. It works really well for us.

As the years have passed and we’ve written more and more together, for this book, I really took our podcast … I took the recordings of our podcast where we had had discussions about different stories and different brands, and I took those conversations and I made them into a book. Then we bounce ideas off each other, but I do the bulk of the writing. Then Scott will look at it, and he’ll change things, and he’ll add something, or he might have an idea of a certain way to express something that I hadn’t thought of, and so he’ll put that in. That’s kind of how we work together.

I would say I do the bulk of the writing. I always have. But even more as the years have gone on and the books have gone on, I do even more of the writing, and Scott kind of shapes the ideas and has kind of the vision for what he wants in the book. We sort of work that way. Then he does revisions. Some of it is written. Like some things he’ll write let’s say as a blog post, and then we’ll take that and then we’ll turn it into a chapter, which is kind of tweaking it a bit and making it part of the concept of the book. That’s how we work. We save ideas back and forth to each other. We have for years. Like if we see an article that we like, we’ll save it to a certain file and then we’ll send it to each other. Then if that makes it onto the podcast, we record the podcasts. Then I had a file of probably like 200 stories that we talked about on the podcast, and I go through all of those, and then picked 100 stories that we wanted to include in the book.

John Jantsch: Now, you know what I love about that, and I’ve done some form of that over the years too, is when you kind of have that intention for the podcast a little bit, and maybe that was not the intention, but it brings intention to the podcast knowing that it’s also something much bigger.

Alison Stratten: Yeah. It wasn’t the intention when we started the podcast, but what happened was that we had already written UnMarketing when we started the podcast, and I think we had already written The Book of Business Awesome and QR Codes Kill Kittens. Then when I was writing on selling, we had started the podcast. I was doing research and thinking about things we talked about, going through my list of all the different articles that Scott and I have sent back and forth to each other during the six months since writing the last book. I was like, “Oh my goodness. I have actual discussions, like what we both thought about this particular issue, and interviews and we’ve done, and all this content. Why am I reinventing the wheel when I can go and listen to what we said about it?” Yeah, I just went and listened and realized, “Oh my goodness. This is like the best resource.” When it came to writing UnBranding, that’s where I stated. I just started with the last podcast after content that was included in UnSelling and kind of started there and went forward. It was awesome, especially because we ended up doing this kind of idea of 100 brand stories, right?

John Jantsch: Yeah.

Alison Stratten: That’s a lot of stories. The podcast made it so accessible to go through and figure out which ones we wanted to use, and which had been kind of the most … It’s just which ones people had reacted to the most, and which ones we had the best conversations about, because we don’t always agree about things on the podcast. Sometimes those are the best experiences, right?

John Jantsch: Yeah.

Alison Stratten:  Why don’t we agree? Either as consumers or as marketers, why don’t we agree on what’s happening here? Yeah, it was great. It’s wonderful for content.

John Jantsch: Yeah. The book literally wrote itself.

Alison Stratten: No. That’s what Scott … Scott loves to say, “Oh, it’s so easy.” He once said to an audience when I happened to be there, he’s like, “Oh, the hardest part is selling the book.” I just looked at him like, “No, the hardest part is not selling the book.”

John Jantsch: So you led right into really my next question. Do you ever have strong opinions, Alison?

Alison Stratten: Oh, I have very strong opinions, of course.

John Jantsch: How do you get those heard, because Scott’s pretty big and loud too?

Alison Stratten: No, we actually work really well together. It’s one of the things that I love about writing together and our podcast together. I think of all the things we do together, working together is really up there. We work really well together. We have a good respect for each other in terms of what we think about things and what we can do. Starting the podcast especially was intimidating because Scott is so seasoned at being a speaker, and also being on camera and recording, and I was really a rookie. I’ve learned a lot from him about how to do that, and how to prepare for it and what’s expected. Yeah, I don’t have a lot of trouble getting my opinions heard. I might be the only person, but I don’t have any problem getting Scott to listen to my opinions.

John Jantsch: Well, it does sound like you have a great working relationship. I don’t think my wife and I could work very well together. We’ve been married 30 plus years, and we’re just now getting to the point where we can actually cook together. It’s really just because I approach everything so differently than she does, and vice versa. I can’t imagine working together, but I love hanging out with her. How’s that?

Alison Stratten: I think that’s partially part of the writ … You asked about the writing. I have heard about people who work with co-authors and they each write chapters and they share them and stuff. That would be really hard for me because I definitely have a certain way that I like to write and a certain process that I have. It would be really hard for me to work with a co-author was was really in the chapters when I was working on them. Does that make sense?

John Jantsch: Oh, absolutely. Absolutely.

Alison Stratten: Scott and I kind of frame out all the ideas together, and he brings a lot of that. Then I write, and then he reads what I’ve written and then we change things from there. But I would have a really hard time if like every time I opened up a document, there was a new paragraph in there. I’d probably lose my mind. It works for us.

John Jantsch: Let’s talk about some of the specifics of the book.

Alison Stratten: Sure.

John Jantsch: One of the questions I hear all the time, and I’m sure you guys are getting this a lot too, is people look at brands like ours and they think, “Oh, I’m just getting started though, and you’ve been blogging for this, or you’ve been doing this all this time. How do I now …” Because when I started blogging, there were 10 of us maybe, you know?

Alison Stratten: Yeah.

John Jantsch: … in the marketing space. How do you now figure out how to cut through what I think is such a noisy landscape?

Alison Stratten: I think actually the more research we do, and the more people we talk to, and the more stories that we hear, it’s actually the people doing the same things that people were doing that made them successful all along are the things that make people successful now. It’s just that there’s kind of this megaphone around things that they can go spread to so many people. I think that the tried and true ideals of taking care of your customers, solving a problem, and providing good service, working as honestly as you can, supporting your workers, supporting your employees, being a good employee, and being a good co-worker, those things are still tried and true. I do agree, like when we started out in social media, if you were kind of a early adopter, you definitely had an advantage, of course. I often feel badly for somebody who thinks jumping into Twitter today is going to be like it was in 2008 or 2009. It’s not, but at the same time, what makes people share things is exactly the same thing as what’s always made people share things. The focus shouldn’t be on the pushing that spread or trying to achieve this pretend goal of reaching a million people you’re never going to meet anyway. It should be about making something that you’re proud of, creating something you’re proud of, and then that’s when your job is done, and seeing it go out into the world.

That’s how I look at the books. For me, I’m kind of like I’m not the person who follows every number and sees every sale and reads everything that comes back review-wise. I’m kind of the person who believes I did my best, and I sent it out into the world. Then other than taking care of customers or answering questions, I feel like that’s my job as an author. I know not everybody sees it that way, but I think it’s the same for business. Many of the stories that we read were simple stories about people with great products that found their community in a really natural, organic kind of way. They didn’t use tricks, and they didn’t game the system. They just worked at it. Nobody wants that answer. Everyone wants to think, “Well, you just put this on your site and it’ll go crazy,” but that doesn’t seem to be the case, at least not from the stories that we’re reading.

John Jantsch: Well, and I think that that does cause some people to jump into tools and technologies and platforms, because they want to catch the next Twitter. I think, boy, that if there ever was a bad reason for doing something, that’s probably it.

Alison Stratten: Yeah. I think so too. Also, we only have so much attention. I know a lot of the people that we talk to are in the entrepreneurial space, but it’s the same if you work for a company or if you own large company, whatever you do. It’s about focus, right? You only have so much attention during the day. You only have so many resources financially and with time and energy, and so if you’re going to put so much focus on chasing what the next Twitter is going to be with the chance that you might be the person who gets in first, you’re taking that attention away from something else. Something’s going to give, and so you need to decide. You always need to ask yourself, “Why?” right?

John Jantsch: Mm-hmm (affirmative).

Alison Stratten: When we did QR Codes Kill Kittens, it’s funny and we were kind of joking, but we were also seriously saying like, “This is a technology that people are using just because they want to use a technology. If you don’t ask yourself, ‘Why?’ and then, ‘How?'” … Very important … “then you’re just doing it for no reason, and it’s going to hurt you instead of help you.”

John Jantsch: I have contended for a long time that after awareness … I mean, people have to know you exist if you’re going to have any hope of turning them into a customer … trust, I think, is like the number one objective after somebody knows you. What did you find in talking to these companies? Is there a common sort of thread on how people build trust? Because that’s one of those things that people tell you, “Be trustworthy,” but how do you make that happens?

Alison Stratten: What exactly does that mean? Yeah. I think that actually a lot of the stories and companies that we looked at built a lot of trust through how they handled mistakes, how they handled negative things happening. We have a story about a company that was a really small company. They sold jewelry, and they had gotten, I can’t remember exactly the number, but let’s say 120 orders coming into the holiday season. They’d shipped them all off, put them in envelopes, all set. That was I think their second or third year in business. Big year, right, for a small company just getting started?

John Jantsch: Mm-hmm (affirmative).

Alison Stratten: They weren’t in Oprah Magazine or anything, just a little company. Then they got a call the next day from the post office that the mailbox that they shipped all of their packages in had actually caught on fire. I mean, terrible, right?

John Jantsch: Oh my.

Alison Stratten: They went through terrible experience with the post office. It was in the U.K., a terrible experience with the post office...

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