#which is ofc fair. if you dont like it then whatever. but its still sad to me. also very upsetting that the cpk tag has been taked over | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

heyitsyn · 4 years ago

Text

HALLOKNEE

Manager!Seijoh

a/n: a halloween special with our boys and the mess it is

summary: lets just say,, things get weird during halloween

okay so first of

halloween isnt a favorite holiday of most of the boys

like they all ltr are towers and skyscrapers but these kids are absolutely terrified of it all

but you just really like the holiday bc of yanno, candy, scary stuff, and omg costumes!

so you were basically very hyped and excited about it and you were excitedly humming to yourself as the date grew closer

the boys were confused as to why you were actually happy and in a good mood but they didnt complain bc they love seeing you happy

the flowery aura makes them heart eyes

HEART GOES DOKIDOKI

oikawa ran over and he stood behind you as you were distractedly humming to your clipboard

‘watcha doing, y/n-chan?’

he whispered to your ear

normally, you would shriek or flinch but you didnt and instead, turned and flashed him a grin

‘checking our schedule! i have a surprise for you all and i want to make sure theres nothing happening to stop it from happening!’

the boys grimaced and held a hand to their heart at your joy and they didnt even question what was going on or why you were so excited

all they know is you were happy

lmao oikawa got the hardest shot to it

he was front seat and his eyes widened and he froze

then he pulled you to his chest and nuzzled his face into your neck

‘aawwww~~!!!! youre so cute y/n-chan!!’

these idiots are so whipped and simp for you so hard that they completely forgot everything

your happiness continued for another week and my god that was probably the best week of their life bc you were just fluttering and giggling and skfjdslkjfdlflfkjs

to be fair though, you mentioned halloween being close and you were looking forward to a family night of watching scary movies in tv and duh these boys were already arguing with each other on who would protect you

‘I WANNA SIT NEXT TO Y/N-CHAN!’

‘WHY?! SO YOU CAN HAVE AN EXCUSE TO HOLD HER?! YOURE A PERVERT SHITTYKAWA!’

‘AS IF YOURE NOT ANY BETTER IWAIZUMI!’

‘HANAMAKI STAY OUT OF THIS!’

ltr its just a big warcry between the third years while the second and first years already were getting head pats from you for being brave boys and were comfy right next to you

‘my boys are so cute~’

ITS A LOVE SHOT! NAAA NANANANANANANAANANAAAAAA

by then, the surprise was getting closer and you were already jumping in your toes

the night before, you texted the group chat to meet you at the school by 8 pm tomorrow

they all sent replies saying okay with no questions

‘okay love you y/n-chan! <3′

‘got it! good night!’

‘sweet dreams darling!’

at around 7:30, you were standing by the school bus since coach mizoguchi omg bless his heart was going to drive you all

the boys were all dressed in warm clothing and my gosh they all looked like models what the heck

we’re just going to ignore and forget that hideous infamous oikawa outfit

but you didnt focus on that and instead waved at them happily

‘you guys!’

oikawa jumped joyfully at your voice before naruto running over to you and scooping you in his arms

‘y/n-chan!’

he shouted and you didnt mind being twirled around since you were giggling and laughing

after iwa punched his head, oikawa had to let you down and they continued bickering so you took this chance to go over to the others by the side

‘are you all excited?’

you asked and they smiled softly

kunimi ruffled your hair and you grabbed his hand

‘it’s really sweet you planned something for us, y/n’

watari reached over to pat your head and you wholeheartedly accepted the affection

‘oi, just tell us’

kyotani grumbled but you cutely smiled and held a peace sign

‘nooo~~!’

you checked your watch and you jumped

‘oh my! we need to hurry on the bus now!’

you herded everyone to sit in their seats and oikawa raised an eyebrow at the driver

‘oh? why is-’

‘your dear manager wanted to have a bonding exercise for the team. how could we refuse? oh, coach irihata said to make sure you know how to breathe and calm down’

the last sentence made question marks appear on everyone’s heads but you waved it off

‘oh come on, mizoguchi-san! dont ruin the surprise!’

you whined from your seat and the elder caught your eye at the rearview

‘just making sure to warn them, especially oikawa’

‘me?’

but he went unanswered

the team gave up trying to ask you bc you would just mischieviously smile and shake your head cutely

‘nope~! not tellingggg~!’

but oh my they were answered

mizoguchi dropped everyone off in front of a building where there was also other people at

owo the people just simply stared bc omg like 12 boys? thats freaking great and i have finally lived and can die peacefully now

the team blinked as they got off the shuttle bus and they were so confused that you waved mizoguchi off to make sure the boys wouldn’t run back to the bus if they figure it out

ofc our ever smart baby kunimi was the first to figure it out and his mouth opened

‘why,,, do you hate us, y/n-chan?’

slowly the light bulbs turned on in everyone’s heads and they all had the same shocked look

DKFLSJDKFJLDKFLJ LIKE IN OHSHC WHEN THEY FIGURED OUT HARUHI’S A GIRL OMG I MISS THAT SHOW

‘nope! im going home!’

kindaichi started to walk but you hurriedly grabbed his arm

‘nooo yuu-kun!!! noo!! please stay!! i worked so hard!!!’

you looked up with your puppy dog eyes and kindaichi scrunched his face up

no no no fight it kindaichi

but ofc hes weak to you so he sighed and went back with the group

‘oi, are you insane or what?’

kyotani, despite his tough facade, wasnt exactly the greatest with any jumpscares in movies so having a jumpscare in real life wouldn’t exaclty be,,,, not violent

but you trust he can handle it and leave the place without a charge for assault

it was clear the others were already regretting it and you got sad bc you did work hard on getting a reservation since this haunted house was the most haunted in this part of japan

your figure in front of them made them tear their eyes away from the scary windows which they swore had someone staring at them

‘come on, you guys! we’ll have fun! i promise! its not that scary!’

you assured but they still didnt look convinced

‘you know, i just,,, i wanted everyone to,, bond and,,, have fun,,,,,, and because halloween is my favorite holiday,, i thought i could share it with you all. but im sorry that i was selfish and,,,, did it even though you guys dont like it’

not at y/n being totally manipulative and using their affections and attraction to her to help her case

your downcast expression and sad eyes snapped them out of it and they just sucked it up and they all shared a look that practically meant

‘suck it up, and make sure y/n is having fun. forget about us, its her time right now’

this led to you guys standing in front of the door guy and he cracked up at the sight of this cute little girl bouncing in her shoes with a group of guys who looked pale and nauseous

‘reservation name?’

‘seijoh!’

you exclaimed and he looked in the list before nodding

‘okay. so first, the rope is what guides you all. make sure, whatever you do, never lose grip on it bc you might get lost. keep in mind, this is an actual abandoned hospital and is known to actually be haunted so unless you want to go ghost-hunting and meet unknown people or spirits, dont stray off’

that warning should’ve scared you like the boys but you just agreed with a bright grin

‘yep!’

the doorguy chuckled before reaching into the box beside him

ngl oikawa was already so scared that he flinched, not knowing what was inside of it

‘a flashlight to help you guide yourselves’

you held it tight and yahaba was already holding on to your jacket sleeve

‘also, phones in the bin, please’

‘hah?!’

iwaizumi started but you placed a hand on his chest

‘its to make sure no one films anything and ruins the surprise’

you assured and he stopped but continued glaring

everyone hesitantly placed their phones into the bin where they saw it being locked into a locker and the key was given to you

‘you can get it back when you exit so dont worry’

you nodded and the team rolled their eyes but nodded anyways

brats

‘all set? okay! go on in! happy hunting!’

omg you were slightly regretting it already

kyotani refused to not be away from you so he was holding your hand while yahaba remained clutching you

the third years wanted to appear all tough so they took the lead but oikawa was screeching and screaming at the littlest things which caused makki to scream and mattsun to also scream and then iwa and everyone else

it was like a screaming train

you even heard kyo gasp multiple times and you tightened your grip on his hand to assure him he was okay and you were right there

everything was going smoothly excused the screaming and everyone was actually having a little bit of fun since it was funny watching everyone scream at the littlest things

‘NOOO!!!!!!’

‘WAAAAHHHH!!!!!!’

the many rooms had the actors and dear god they should be emmy winning by how they just stared at you all and still sent shivers down your spines

then the unthinkable happened

the flashlight that iwaizumi was holding started to flicker and eventually died, leaving you all stranded in the pitch-dark

there wasnt even any light above you so everything was just black

everyone stopped, your breathing being paused and no one made a sound

‘RAAAA!’

someone from beside you shouted in your ear and you screamed so loudly and in instinct, everyone bolted forward with no direction on where to go

kunimi and kindaichi were holding each others hands and ran also dragging along watari since he was holding kunimi’s sleeve and also yahaba and you and kyo

‘IWA-CHAN!!!’

oikawa instinctively shouted and they all held on to each other

mattsun expected to catch ahold of watari’s hoodie since he was behind him but there was nothing but air

‘uh, you guys?’

he wished and prayed and hoped your voice would answer back but there was silence

‘oi! l/n y/n!’

he shouted and makki trembled in fear

‘iwaizumi? oikawa?’

‘h-huh!’

iwaizumi grunted and my goodness was this really happening

everything was going too smoothly that something bad happening shouldve been seen from the get-go!

the 4 third years were thankfully with each other since they were already huddled up at the front but their kouhais were nowhere near them

‘iwa-chan! what do we do!’

oikawa cried and iwaizumi hit him to keep him quiet

‘shut up shittykawa!’

‘oi! stop fighting and think about this!’

mattsun quieted them down into shaking forms

‘the team is gone. theyre somewhere in this hospital and there’s a chance theyve strayed off the path’

makki shakily breathed

‘so what should we do?’

iwaizumi bit his lip to think of a plan

‘should we just go around and shout and scream for them?’

oikawa suggested but makki turned it down

‘no. that would ruin it for everyone else. we’re not the only ones in here’

oikawa blanched

‘i dont care about the other people! who knows what happened to y/n! i give no fck about strangers when she could be lost somewhere in this big ass hospital!’

they were stumped with no solutions so they just agreed to iwa’s suggestion

‘lets just hurry and get this over with and meet the people outside and get their help’

‘or! we can ask the staff in here, the actors, to help us! this is an accident’

‘you stupid or dumb? you think they would help us? its an us problem, not theirs, so theyre not going to abandon their post and look for them’

ltr maybe its the panic thats making them all crazy but they just settledon hurrying up and finishing the maze so they could get help

but the moment they turned to what seems to be a corner, they already managed to get themselves lost

iwaizumi felt around for the familiar texture of the rope which is supposed to be at his right but in the end, his hand reached nothing

‘fck!’

he shouted and scared the other 3

‘WHAT?!’

makki yelled

‘the rope. the rope’s not here anymore’

silence

then oikawa sobbed

‘oh my god im going to die’

he whimpered and makki sniffled

‘i wanna go home’

mattsun and iwa were the only at least stable ones and they finally resigned to defeat and grabbed their friends and walked to nowhere

on to your side!!

you and the others finally stopped running but the beating of your hearts still pumped at a fast speed

‘are we safe now?!’

kindaichi shouted and there was a chorus of confusion amongst the others

‘iwa-san?’

you checked and usually he would grunt but there was just silence

it was quiet and the familiar voice of oikawa was nowhere in sight

‘i dont know about you guys but my oikawa sensors just shut off’

yahaba pointed out and you gasped

‘where are they?’

kyotani refused to let go so you felt around with your left hand for the rope

to your relief, it was still there but the feeling of the missing boys outweighed it and made your anxiety levels spike up

‘should we call them? lets call them’

yahaba started but kyotani bonked his head

‘baka. they took our phones earlier’

the reminder of the confiscated form of communication meant that there was no other way you could contact the others

panic bubbled over kindaichi watari and yahaba while you kunimi and kyotani were busy thinking of something

‘i think theyve strayed off. if they didn’t, they wouldve heard us from up there’

kunimi mumbled

‘but where else could they have gone to?’

you asked and kyotani huffed beside you

‘we cant see anything. hell, i cant even see you. obviously theres probably a hallway they ran down to without even knowing they went there’

‘so youre saying theyre lost? without any way to contact us? what do we do?’

you whimpered, finally realizing and the idea of the others being gone settling in

‘this is all my fault. i shouldnt have dragged you here. i made a mistake-’

‘hey, dont freak out. im right here’

even though you couldnt see him, kenta maneuvered his way to cup your face and you felt his forehead press against yours and his nose nuzzling your cheek

the smell of cherry blossoms and vanilla with the slightest hint of sandalwood

kyotani’s scent comforted you and you were able to calm down

‘we’ll figure this out. its okay, you got me’

he whispered and you nodded

‘youre right here. we’ll be okay, okay?’

you giggled a little bit at the repitition of the word but smiled when he pulled you close to his chest

ugh i mightve already written a kyo route but that doesnt stop me from putting in kyo moments :”)

the other 4 were figuring out a plan that was eerily similar to the 3rd years

‘lets just finish this and ask the staff for help later’

they all agreed to kunimi’s idea and hurriedly gripped the rope to start going back to the path

you were in between kindaichi and kyotani with the former in front and the latter behind you

‘im right here. you got this’

kyotani would occasionally whisper and you were so grateful to have someone to be there

then the lights flickered and your eyes caught sight of something down the hallway to your left and you noticed a shadow

a shadow of a tall figure that was kinda familiar

‘y/n-chan~’

you flinched and the voice of your blocker filled your ears

‘mattsun-san?’

you were too focused on the voice to hear the others questions of what was happening

‘over here, y/n-chan~’

there it was again

‘mattsun-san!’

you shouted and bolted to the hallway where you were sure the voice was at and you were ignoring the shouts of the others and kyotani hurriedly ran after you

‘mattsun-san!’

you shouted again and you ended up at the hallway, with the lights still flickering but there was no one

kyotani panted as he caught up to you before snatching your hand

‘oi! dont run off like that!’

it seems the others were too scared to let go of the rope that they were fine if kyotani went after you bc he was strong so he could protect you both if needed

right?

kyotani is a bark bark woof woof boy not a priest

you felt his warm hand grip your again as if to signal that you werent running off alone again

‘i heard him i swea-’

‘to your left, y/n-chan~’

ok ngl im getting chills writing this

the flickering lights allowed you to see the shadow again and yep there it was

it was at the end of the hallway to your left and once you turned and saw it, it ran to the right

‘mattsun-san! wait!’

as you were going to run, kyotani refused to let you go

he placed strong hands to your shoulders and you looked up at him, your eyes manic

‘listen to me, y/n. youre hearing things’

he firmly said

‘i dont hear matsukawa or anyone’

you started breathing heavily, the air seemingly getting colder and thinner

‘you dont understand! he was right there! his shadow-!’

‘let her play a game, boy!’

matsukawa’s voice this time took a harsh tone and even kyotani jumped, holding you to his chest protectively

‘oi! matsukawa! its not funny anymore!’

your eyes looked over kyo’s shoulder and you saw the shadow again from behind him

‘please trust me, kyo! hm?’

you begged and he sighed

‘im holding on to you. im not letting you go again’

this wouldve been romantic if you werent in an actual paranormal story

you chased after the ghost and it would occasionally whisper in your ear to keep your attention until you ran into a pitch-black hallway

‘what do we do now, y/n?’

kyo whispered and you trembled

‘mattsun-san!’

you weakly cried, knowing there was a strong possibility he wouldnt answer back

but a loud screech from the far right brought hope into you

‘Y/N-CHAN!’

is that-

‘oikawa-san?!’

you shrieked and there was a trample of footsteps running over to you and naturally, kyotani pulled you behind him

then a hand made you shriek

‘relax. its just me, y/n-chan’

mattsun’s voice sounded clearer this time since he was right beside you and you hugged him

‘come on. everyone hold hands so that no one will get lost. we’ll take about this later’

iwa commanded and as the true leader of the gang, everyone followed his lead

there was a red sign with the most amazing word on top of it

‘EXIT’

it looked like a door that was only meant for staff but at this point, you all were desperate to just leave

as you reached the handle, the voice came back

‘aw~ leaving so soon?’

you turned around, halting mattsun and kyotani as they held your hands and felt you stop

‘show yourself. i know you’re not mattsun-san so stop using his voice’

you demanded and you turned, feeling a chilly air rush behind you

‘boo~’

it whispered to your ear and you eyes widened at the sight from further down the hallway

you could make out a mass of a body and at the top, there was bright red eyes and white teeth smiling menacingly

‘oh my god’

you whispered and the boys saw exactly what you were seeing

‘what is that’

oikawa whimpered

its mouth obviously moved as it spoke

‘are you leaving me, y/n-chan? so cruel~’

its voice was sickly sweet and sounded like a teenage boy’s but was so mean and hate-filled

you started sobbing and oikawa turned the door to run but it stayed put and didnt budge

‘you were so fun to play with~ are your friends fun too~?’

it looked like it was coming closer with a hand outstretched and you started shivering and your voice ripped into a scream

‘stop! go away!’

iwa mustered all his strength and ran against the metal door but it opened on its own, leaving the boy to land on the grass from outside

you were pulled by the others before it could touch you and you were already hysterically crying before the first and second years ran over and engulfed you to a hug

you were being hushed by the them and you tightly held on to someone’s arms

‘sshhh its okay, we’re right here’

you reduced to hiccups before looking around

‘w-where’s the other people?’

you asked, taking notice of the empty field

‘are we at the back?’

the boys shared a confused look

‘huh? what are you talking about, y/n?’

you looked at yahaba like he was crazy

‘the other people! the other people wanting to go in! and the doorguy! the haunted event! the haunted house!’

their eyes flickered everywhere to try and make sense of what you were saying but in the end resulted to just pure confusion and fear

‘y/n, we’re not at some event’

iwa started and your eyes widened

‘w-what?’

makki shakingly placed a hand on your shoulder

‘y/n, you dragged us here to go ghost-hunting. and there’s no doorguy’

your eyes flickered down as your mind tried to wrap itself with what was going on

‘what do you mean? i took you here for a haunted attraction! the doorguy took our phones and locked them in a locker, remember?’

you wildly waved your arms around but they still didnt understand

‘and the flashlight! and the rope! w-we had to hold on to the rope! the rope made sure we didnt stray off the path! bu-but the flashlight! the flashlight died!’

kunimi noticed the beginning of a panic attack so he pulled you close to him and made sure you could feel his heartbeat

‘listen to me, y/n. you took us here because we all lost a bet with you and this was what you wanted since its halloween and we trespassed to go here and there was no doorguy who took our phones because all our phones died the moment we got here and we saw a rope hanging from the ceiling and we had no flashlight in the first place’

he whispered to your ear and you pushed away from him, curling your arms around yourself

‘no! what bet?! i took you here for bonding time for our volleyball team! you were getting busy for inter high so i figured this could help you have fun!’

now that took the cake

‘what volleyball team?’

your eyes finally settled on your ‘captain’

‘what do you mean, ‘what volleyball team’, oikawa-san?’

totally disregarding the fact that you just called him by his last name instead of his first, he focused on what you were talking about

‘if you wanted to bond with the volleyball team, then you brought the wrong sport team over then’

oikawa scoffed, feeling rage bubbling inside him at the familiar players of the volleyball team

‘you shouldve brought over nagisa and rin and them, then, y/n’

makki bitterly mumbled and you were just so exhausted and tired and confused

‘WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT’

you bursted and started crying which ofc prompted the others to calm down and focus on you

‘y/n, love, we’re the swimming team, not the little ball playing game’

mattsun reminded and you shook your head, disbelief and utter fear present in your face

‘then-then! oikawa-san! give me your right knee!’

you ran over and he questioningly raised his leg

‘uhh,, what are you doing, y/n?’

kunimi asked but you waved him off, determination in your eyes

‘this should prove hes a volleyball player’

then you punched it really hard which resulted with a sickening pop

oikawa screamed

a/n: idk if the concept is clear enough but uwu send in a guess and ill answer if you got it right

191 notes · View notes

vanityloves · 4 years ago

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🎫 here's a gush pass! feel free to gush about whichever f/o you want, however much you want, then send this ask to 3 other selfshippers!

oh man, thank you jsjsj ive gotten a few of these but ive been too anxious to actually go off ab my f/o but, lets fucking gooooo!

can i talk ab the actual animation of the source material is that allowed?

they gave us this but we ended up with

WHICH LISTEN- I enjoy n love regardless. I just find the contrasts in phases fascinating and funny. I loved his appearance in phases 1 and 2; what a fucking iconic character design. The animation is so endearing and amazing- the thicker lines, the fluidity, the range. Like the first gif that shows the vibrations of the vehicle in his shoulders/shirt? The simplistic art style was nice and even if hes Hard On The Eyes, I'm like 🥴 ok ugly ❤.

Not like the newer mvs are any less quality content - its nice to see the use of thick and thinner lines and there's definitely a different feel to it - more child friendly or easy going? Idk how to explain it. Murdoc as a character is still very, Not Child Friendly, and Im always like :cursed emoji: when someone says that their 14 year old watches their videos like help, his dick is out in at least 3 dif vids (censored ofc but man).

They definitely lost me after the 4th phase though and many people argue that the band/music lost its meaning, which i can honestly agree with (esp when they didnt name officially name 4, 5 and 6. Im p sure ppl refer to 4 as We Are Still Humanz).

I was never an avid/active fan of keeping up with the characters and didnt really think they had any story anyways, i was like "feel good inc is sexy. melancholy hill's a banger" so honestly, finding out that these apes actually have lore was fun.

Murdoc being the given this tragic backstory made my eyes Zoom, and ofc I was like "oh youre funny looking and sad. I want you ♡." In a weird way, I take a lot of comfort that 'we both have shit parents' and 'no one really thought we'd amount to anything'. to be fair, i haven't accomplished anything yet, and even if hes a bunch of pixels who i know doesnt really exist, its kind of motivating bc he never gave up? A literal quote from him being "If there’s a dream in your heart, never let anyone tell you you’ve got no talent. Get out there, embarrass yourself, and prove to the world you’ve got no talent." With how many failures hes faced he never stopped trying to prove himself worthy of attention and fame and love, which is ambitious and kind of intimidating with how much confidnece he has.

Hes a complete bastard of a man and not even close to being a good person. He's definitely complicated but can be boiled down to "just an abusive asshole", which, hey, fair. I hate the way he treats 2D, its so toxic and terrible. Honestly, its inexcusable and he needs to apologize, grow and learn a LOT and god knows he needs therapy.

I think the most tragic thing ab his character is that he basically ended up like his father and to some extent, he acknowledges it. His bad habits and behaviors stem from abuse and neglect which doesnt excuse his actions but, "man hands on misery to man." I feel like theres a haunting part to his whole life - we don't know much about his mother and brother but from assuming things, I know they weren't innocent, clean, or soft spoken, let alone, kind. I think he has a "It runs in the family" mentality and gives into it bc there's no use in running from something so deeply engraved within him.

But as a man of contradiction, hes shown to care, despite "hating everything, including himself". To be short, his father was a failure and a man thats never worked for his own money, so he contradicts that and escapes that part of 'failure running in the family' by forming Gorillaz. I do think theres something way more ab his character in that regard. I think theres a lot that he needs to work on but he's escaped a part of that mindset, and his 'Plastic Beach'. I wonder what theyre gonna do with valley of the pagans thing.

I guess as a band, theyre not gonna show a lot of "behind the scenes" stuff like that. We wont know if he ever gets help, or apologizes, or even feels sorry - its up to us to decide which is a safe game to play on Their Behalf.

People are upset that hes actually cleaned up a bit and is shown to be nicer bc they miss having that disgusting, cruel man which again, I understand. He has always been the antagonist to the entire band. But as someone that likes to see people happier n mellow (or, boring) rather than doing shit and compensating for their depression, its nice to see that type of development (or downgrade, depending on how you see it).

This could be Their (read: jamie and damon) way of being lazy by making him 'mellow out w/ age' or whatever it is. It definitely seems to woobify his character and intentions but well, His Main Goal, Was To Blow Up. And Act Like He Dont Know Nobodaaayyy argargarg and guess what? He's already made it- he's successful, he's rich, he's famous, he's adored. Now what? Maybe this is just his way of taking it easy from here on out - who knows.

Gorillaz definitely took a turn after all the brand deals so it lost its meaning (since one of the phases had a 'fuck capitalism' message) and with that, Murdoc is no longer allowed to be the stank bitch hes was always meant to be, no more obvious sex and drugs, for the new gen 🥴 ironically a lot of songs 'today' are always complained ab being ab sex, drugs, and whatever, but they def needed to step on the breaks when Money/Companies got involved. So here we have The Wigglez 😌💕

ANYWAYS, I LOVE HIM LOTS, HAVING MANY THOUGHTS

#please dont ask why i have these saved 🥴#ask reply #oh this ones long haha sorry #gorillaz rambles #gushing #modi!!!#thank you for this i needed to say sumn semi coherent

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kweebtrash · 5 years ago

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Hey, not necessarily a sex question. But as someone who loves reading fanfic and appreciates fanfic writers, I still can't bring myself to write it. How did you get into writing fanfic, and was it ever weird for you? Do you have any advice on how to feel less weird about it? Especially smut about real people? (To be fair I can't bring myself to write smut in general idk why)

I started writing naruto and yu yu hakusho fanfiction when i was ten and it was just a regular oc and the character i liked. It wasnt good at all but i thought it was the greatest. When i met my sister (non biological) in middle school we decided to come up with our own "anime story". We would write it in notebooks and pass it to each other during class and get in trouble for it. So i guess that was the first time ive written an "original" story. By the time i was 12 i knew what sex was (mostly) and i knew teenagers did it (my characters were teenagers) so i was like oh if they like each other then they should do it. But because i was 12 i was like THATS ICKY TO WRITE ABOUT (in detail) so i made them get in bed and then skipped ahead and wrote THE NEXT DAY 😂😂😂

Then when i got access to a laptop and internet thats when i round "real" fanfiction online and smut back when it was called "lemon/lime/citrus" whatever the fuck that means. I still remember my first one was about neji hyuga LMAO.

I started reading more fanfiction throughout my teenager years and kept writing for anime, wrote bandfiction, created a bunch of OCs to rp with my partner at the time and i think by the time i actually started having sex that i was like ok this isnt so weird to write about anymore. So when we would rp we would just text each other sex scenes and i guess it became normalized because we were doing it irl so writing about it was just like hey! We sorta know what were doing! Oh i also used to watch a lot of porn as a teen? Idk why. That stopped after like a year or so but i found out shit through that, like bdsm, squirting, how utterly gross blowjobs are, what a hitachi wand was, how much i hate spit, etc. So that actually helped me discover like my beginning kinks. Porn is still terrible tho.

I think the first time i wrote smut was with a wrestling fanfic? And i had been reading a bunch of fics that had smut and with my basic knowledge and slowly finding out what phrases i liked in order to describe things it flowed a little more naturally but it was still hard.

Then i think i didnt really write much until i wrote my pentagon story which i think is terrible but other people like it. I guess with my practicing, experience, and sex education it started becoming easier? You can tell in my pentagon story that i was still getting back into the swing of things bc my sex scenes are atrocious and ridiculous 😅

I never really liked reading series myself bc i didnt want just prose and build up. I wanted smut. I was like THATS WHAT I CAME HERE FOR. So i made it a point to write smut in every single chapter so that way people stayed interested. In doing so it also helped me practice and get better. Then i read A LOT of bad kpop fics and was like....why dont these people know that sex isnt like porn??

There is a lot of copying in kpop fics in the sense that a lot of them are written the same way and we get the usual; some u realistic giant dick, "ministrations, pussy, cunt", kitten every other word, thigh riding, everyone confusing abuse with bdsm, "daddy" popping up left and right without going in depth to what meaning that holds, random weird shit. And i realized WOW I REALLY HATE KPOP FANFICS lol. So when i started writing messy i was like OK FUCK THIS IM GONNA WRITE SEX LIKE HOW ITS SUPPOSED TO GO. Then i starting writing smut where the condom broke, they talked about birth control, having a mental breakdown during sex, sexual assault, accidentally wacking each other while moving around, giggling, talking, explaining what you want. This i think helped me a lot, especially with my mental trauma that was associated with sex. I wanted to make it fun and real while also possibly teaching my readers about sex and maybe influencing other fic writers to not just regurgitate what they read.

As far as advice, im not quite sure if i have any?? Maybe i do lol. Take it with a grain of salt maybe?

With writing i would suggest

Read fics you like and highlight key phrases or actions you think are sexually appealing

Practice writing shorter scenes, you can even do time stamps or drabbles, things like that-people love those on here

Look into things. Honestly i knew what a cock ring was but someone requested i USE it in a fic and i was like shit guess i gotta google how to use a cock ring and while awkwardly watching videos of guys putting these things on i learned about metal ones, cages, silicone, rubber, rings, how long you should keep it on for, etc. So RESEARCH! is key too

If youve never had sex before that also helps if you research. Porn can give you a little bit of knowledge in generic motions or toys to use but by no means is it great as far as realism and sometimes its just plain icky.

So porn can be a basis, research can be a middle layer, reading other fics and seeing what you like and dont like is on top, and writing ur own is like...idk frosting lol.

As far as being weird with real people; since i wrote bandfiction and wrestling fics i was used to writing about real people for a little under ten years or so. Also i have a really active mind at night and i have tons of sex dreams that fit into like a story based setting. Thats where all my ideas for prose, dialogue and smut come from. Not everyone ofc has a brain like that but writing down things here and there might work. Lets say you have a favorite idol moment-like some really slutty dance move during a performance, you could time stamp that for inspiration. Save a lot of gifs and pics of them looking *chefs kiss*, listen to some music (i like alina baraz, sabrina claudio, galant, alex tbh, and jooyong for softer, gentler scenes or if you wanna get freak nastie listen to some dumbass jae park, or pretty ricky, or any sex related song thats not pretty lmao. Like rude boy by rihanna or something with a hard beat).

I think its also good to try and picture yourself in a sexual situation. You dont have to look like you, you could make up however you want to look in the scenario, its fantasy after all. Also think "would i like this?" Like i wont write about some idol spitting in my mouth or slapping me or peeing on me or something because thats not stuff that im into and i would be forcing myself to appease someone else and the writing woukd end up sucking big time. This also doesnt help the lack of good fics bc people are just following the requests they get even if they dont like it. I would write about what i think id feel in the moment. Id probably be nervous or if im pretending i could be a cool badass, i would think about things that i find attractive like his (imma use his bc i do write mostly about boy idols) face in the shadows of the light, how nice or soft his lips look, they way hes conveying emotions and looking at me if we were in love or if we were angry, the hold he has on me, why would it be going slow? Is it sad makeup sex? Is it a first time together? Is it just comforting after a bad day? Why would they be rough? Are they angry? Had a fight? Had a slow burn relationship and its culminated into a big explosion? Did they hate each other but hide their true feelings?

So i would suggest not just thinking about sex but thinking about the moment and all the things that lead up to, happen during, and the aftermath of it.

And of course if you don't understand anything or need more info about sex you can always ask me!

I hope this help and sorry its long😅😅😅😅

#i love my readers!

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tilltheendwilliwrite · 7 years ago

Text

Qi Flows for Her

Chapter Two

Previous Chapter

Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC x Bucky Barnes | Word Count: 5561 Warnings: Swearing

Celine stood on the pinnacle of the pretty bridge, staring out at the beauty of Central Park. Evening was falling, her favourite time of day. Long shadows were beginning to coat the buildings beyond the trees and deepened the ones beneath the foliage. The sound of the water under the bridge soothed her anxiety. The two males with her helped as well.

Peter was full of energy, vitality, and fun. Just like his aura, he bubbled with excitement.

It lifted her spirits.

Bucky, too, took her mind off of the drama which was likely unfolding high above in the tower. One would never know to look at him that he was from a different era. He fit quite well into this one. He laughed and joked with Peter about current sports teams and relevant celebrities. Even with the dark aura which hung around him, he had a soothing presence.

When Peter’s phone rang and he sighed, his aura dimming, she knew he was being called home. The little spider was still in high school and had other obligations. He covered his involvement with the Avengers, and as Spider-Man, by saying he was interning with Tony after having won some sort of scholarship. From what she'd seen of his intelligence, it was a good misdirection.

“It is alright, Peter. I am certain I will be here at least a few days.” If this alliance didn’t work out, she would make sure she got to say goodbye before she left. “Will you do me a favour, little spider?”

“Name it, Celine!”

She touched his cheek. “I would rather people not know about my… preferred food source. Can we keep the vampire comments between us?”

His face fell, the thought sobering, but he nodded. “I understand.”

His emotions rippled through his aura. She could feel his disappointment, both in keeping her secret and in how the others had reacted to her. Cupping his chin, she tilted his face up. “Peter, I am fine.” It wasn’t the first time others had reacted poorly to her.

“It's just… not fair. You’re on our side.”

“Hey, pal.” Bucky laid a hand on Peter’s shoulder. “Don’t worry. Steve and I’ll look after Celine and help her fit in. This isn’t going to go there. This ain’t ending up another battle at the airport.”

“Promise?” He looked to Bucky.

Celine frowned, not really understanding the spiking emotions of the two males or the subtle nuances.

“Promise, pal.”

Peter heaved a sigh but smiled and nodded. “Okay. I’ll see you in a few days. If I’m not home in thirty Aunt May is gonna freak.” He took off at a run with a wave.

“Will he make it alright?” Celine asked.

“Parker?” Bucky chuckled. “He’s the web-slinger. He’ll make it.”

Celine leaned back against the edge of the bridge, resting her hands beside her hips. “What did I miss in that exchange?”

He sighed, leaning beside her. “When things went bad after the accords, it split the team. Steve and I were on one side. Peter was on Tony’s. After, when things settled down, and we all made peace, Peter got real attached to Steve. Pretty sure the kid didn’t want to watch the two of them go at it over you, so when he asked to come with…” Bucky shrugged.

Celine brought a hand to her mouth. “I told Charles… I’m not the right choice for this,” she whispered, shaking her head sadly.

“Hey now, it ain’t like that.” His fingers lightly touched the back of her hand.

She looked up to find his eyes full of kindness. “I can't let Wanda in. I can’t, Bucky. There are… things about me which I do not wish to have known. But I am not a danger to your team.”

“Dollface, I know all about people fuckin’ with your head. If you don’t want her running around upstairs, you ain’t gonna hear me protest.”

“Says the man most suspicious of my arrival.”

“Hey! I… that ain’t fair,” he grumbled, eyes twinkling. “I didn’t know you then.”

“You don’t know me now,” she said, pressing away from the railing and sauntering deeper into the park.

“I know no woman in her right mind would wear shoes like that to walk through the park.”

Grinning over her shoulder, she kicked up a foot. “These old things? You’d be surprised what I can do in a pair of stilettos.” There was an intense spike in his libido which she chose to ignore. This was her team now. She wasn’t going to feed on her team no matter how hungry they made her.

Both super soldiers had stirred something inside her with their initial meeting. The first brush of fingers had jolted through her, built a fire, and brought forth her innate sexuality. They made her hungry with so little effort. Sexual desire was not something she’d felt in many years.

It made her flirty. Too flirty. Dialling it back, Celine tucked her hands in her pockets.

His hand closed around her elbow. “Celine, I meant what I said to Peter. You do belong here. Steve and I will make sure the others see that too.”

She blinked at the determination she found in the set of his jaw. “Thank you, Bucky. I have… difficulty adjusting to new environments.”

“You okay, doll? You seem…” He shook his head.

She pulled her arm gently from his hold and walked on. “I have been a freak of nature since I was twelve. It should not surprise me when people fear and abhor me, but it still does. Peter’s easy acceptance, yours, and Steve’s… it’s unsettling. The only others who have been so accepting are Charles, Rogue, and Logan.”

“You ain’t no better or worse than the next person, Celine. Just cause you’re different doesn’t make you a freak.”

She laughed, the sound full of disbelief. “You do not yet understand, but you will. When you see… when you see what I am… and can say those words, mean those words, then perhaps I will believe you.”

“Celine,” he said, voice full of shock and aura full of sadness.

Turning her head, she smiled, but it did not reach her eyes. “It is alright, Bucky. I am used to being alone. If the team chooses to let me stay without demanding to look through my head, I will fight alongside you. But I do not expect you to be comfortable with me. I am not like you.” She motioned with her chin toward the tower. “Steve approaches.” Not yet willing to find out how badly she’d been rejected, Celine walked the other way to sit on a bench far enough from the two soldiers to give them privacy to speak.

***

Bucky had not felt this powerless since his time with Hydra.

Celine, this gorgeous, strong woman, one who sustained her own life off the emotions of others, was so clearly fragile and so deeply scarred he wanted nothing more than to drag her into a hug so tight, she would feel safe and protected for the rest of her life.

What had happened in the tower, that shit couldn’t happen again.

“Steve,” he said when the blond stopped at his side. “You rip Tony a new one?”

“Yeah. He’s really got to stop pulling this stuff,” Steve sighed, rubbing a hand over his mouth.

“He come down off his high horse, or he still demanding Wanda vet Celine?”

“Less of a comedown, more of a knocked off. Wanda won’t do it. I guess can’t do it is more the issue. Celine has shields the likes of which Wanda ain’t ever seen before. She’d barely approached Celine’s mind, and Celine noticed.”

“She belongs here, Steve. I promised Parker we’d look after her.”

Steve’s brow arched. “Weren’t you the one saying you didn’t like this idea?”

“Yeah, well, opinions can change. Celine… she needs us.” He didn’t know how he knew, he just did. “She’s… fragile, pal. For all her power, she’s broken inside. She expects us to work with her but not work with her, ya know? Just ghost along on the outskirts of the team.”

Steve glanced her way, noticing how her eyes were closed, her face tilted to the last rays of the sun. She was, truly, incredibly beautiful. Even here in the park, she was drawing eyes. “What she tell you?”

“Just that the only ones who trusted her were Charles, Rogue, and Logan. The fact that you, me, and Peter didn’t bat an eye threw her. She’s apparently used to being alone.”

“What?” Steve couldn’t believe it.

Bucky shrugged. “No matter what happens on this next mission, whatever she reveals herself as, we can’t let it phase us. I got a weird feeling, a gut feeling. She needs us.” His gut feelings back in the day used to be the ones that kept them out of the worst spots of trouble.

“I’m with you, pal.”

“You’d better be, punk.”

They smirked at each other before heading for Celine.

“So, it appears I am not banished from the team after all,” she called out once they were closer.

“Nah, you ain’t getting rid of us that easy.” She opened her eyes once they stood before her, and Bucky had his breath catch. “C’mon. You said you like food. It’s nearly dinner time, and Wanda was cooking tonight.”

She took his outstretched hand. The same jolt from the contact raced up his arm as before when he tugged her to her feet.

“What is the catch, Steve?” she asked once she was upright.

“How do you keep…?” He shook his head, a wry smile spreading across his lips. “Shoot. Am I that easy to read?”

“Like a book, Cap,” she chuckled. “You must be rubbish at poker.”

“Rubbish?” Bucky snickered.

Celine shrugged. “Charles is rather English. Some of his lingo stuck. It means Steve must suck something fierce at cards.”

“Hey, now! I’m not that bad!” the blond super soldier protested.

“Yeah, you are,” Bucky laughed.

“Big jerk.”

“Scrawny punk!”

Celine snickered. “How is this,” she flicked her hand like a game show hostess down Steve’s chest, “scrawny?”

“He was smaller than a flea before he let the Army jack him full of steroids,” Bucky said. “Thought I told you not to do anything stupid?”

“And I told you, you took all the stupid with you. There was no stupid left. Therefore what I did was patriotic.”

She burst out laughing as they crossed the street. “Are you two always like this?”

“Yes,” they said together.

Celine continued to laugh as she turned away from the main doors to the tower.

“That’s the wrong way,” Bucky called out.

She threw a grin over her shoulder. “As I have two such strong men at my disposal, why not get assistance with my luggage?”

Her walk had a distinct tone of sass to it Bucky preferred to the sadness she’d walked in earlier. He glanced at Steve and muttered, “I feel played. Do you feel played?”

“Don’t hate the player!” Celine called as she entered the parking garage.

Squealing tires had Bucky and Steve looking to the left, but Celine was already striding toward her car and never saw him coming until the lights from the speeding vehicle blinded her. She threw up her arms, and her power burst to life around her, but not soon enough to stop the speeding truck from slamming into her side and throwing her through the air.

“Celine!” Bucky and Steve yelled, racing toward her.

“Shit! I’m so sorry!” The driver was out of his vehicle, cellphone in hand.

Ignoring him for the moment, Steve and Bucky knelt to either side of the crumpled form of Celine. Her eyelids fluttered open, and she groaned.

“Doll? You okay? Just lie still. We’ll get some help.” Bucky pressed his hand gingerly down on her shoulder.

“I’m fine,” she said, batting at his hand.

“You just got hit by a truck! You ain’t fine.” Steve glared at the man who was continuing to babble about not seeing her and the coffee he’d spilled in his lap had distracted him.

“Bucky. Steve, I’m fine,” she reiterated, sitting up against Bucky’s pressing hand. “Just help me up.”

They both gaped at her before each took a hand and lifted her gingerly to her feet.

“Broke my favourite pair of shoes,” she muttered.

“That’s it?” Bucky gasped. “A shoe? You got hit by a truck, and it broke your shoe?”

She blinked at him. “Um… yes?”

“Jesus!” He threw up his hands, turned toward the driver and pointed. “Get the fuck out of here, and slow the fuck down!” The man was one he recognized from the tower, though Bucky wasn’t sure which department he was in. “You’re damn lucky she’s enhanced our you likely would have killed her!”

“Yes, sir!” the man scrambled to obey. “I’m really sorry, ma’am!” he shouted as he got in his truck and practically crawled out of the building.

Celine’s knees wobbled, and Steve grabbed her around the waist. “You sure you’re okay? We should let Bruce check you out.”

She patted his shoulders and pulled away. “Totally fine, promise. I’ve been hit with worse, and far harder.” She walked away, stopping only to take her shoes off and place them in a garbage can.

She got three inches shorter, and Bucky could have groaned. There was nothing better in his opinion than a woman with curves who would fit nicely beneath his chin. Celine checked all those boxes. From the look on Steve’s face, he wasn’t the only one who thought so.

She popped the trunk on her nearby car, pulled out two large suitcases and a third smaller one. From inside that one, she tugged a new pair of shoes.

“Do not tell us that one is just shoes.”

She glanced at Steve and smiled a secret smile but didn’t reply as she brushed off her feet and slipped into the new, shorter set of heels. Her pants had torn at the thigh, giving Bucky a flash of delicate flesh, and the back of her jacket was dirty, but she looked relatively unscathed for someone who’d taken a licking by a pick-up truck. “What’s not in your file, Celine?”

Her grip on the strap of the smaller suitcase she’d placed on her shoulder tightened. “Because I channel chi as I do, I am stronger, faster, and can hear better than your average human. I also… live longer.”

“How can you be certain?” Steve asked.

“I have not aged in twenty years.”

“What?” Bucky asked, stunned.

She simply shrugged. “I do not know how it works, or if I will age, or when. But I am very hard to injure.”

The two soldiers exchanged wry smiles. “Shit, doll. You’re more like us than we realized.”

“Except for the whole not needing to eat thing. I’m starving,” Steve chuckled, grabbing up one suitcase.

Bucky took the other. “Me too.”

“I could eat.” She blushed when they both looked at her. “Um, real food. I won’t need to feed for a few days.”

“We should have a mission by then. That work for you?” Steve asked.

Bucky watched something, a flicker of emotion he couldn’t place, spark in her eyes before she hid them behind her lashes.

“Yes, that will be fine.” Celine nodded, shut the trunk of her car, and followed them to the lobby entrance.

***

She stood within the confines of her suite of rooms and blinked in shock. “Here? This is… here?”

“What? Not up to X-men standards?” Bucky teased.

“We’ll have to tell Tony there’s something better somewhere else.” Steve chuckled.

Horrified, Celine shook her head and walked deeper into the sitting room. “No! That isn't what I meant at all! When I still lived at the Manor, we each have a room, but this is…” She ran out of words and just waved a limp hand.

The main space consisted of a seating area with couches, chairs, and an entertainment center. The wall across from her was all windows with a glass topped desk taking in the view of New York. There was a small kitchenette off to one side, a half fridge, sink, and cabinets. Through the open door, she caught a glimpse of a wide white bed, thick and plush and piled with pillows. A woman would feel like a Queen sleeping among the cloudlike softness promised in all that plush.

Gliding toward the windows, she let her case of shoes fall from her shoulder with a small thump. The walls were decorated in soothing colours. Paintings by various impressionist artists, ones she’d always adored hung around the room. She wondered briefly if Charles had made mention of her preference as it was something he would do.

She touched the soft cotton sheer which hung against the window. “It’s more than I expected.” Celine turned and smiled at the two soldiers standing together across the room. They exchanged a glance, one which she couldn’t decipher before two sets of stunning blue eyes returned to assess her.

“You want to change before dinner, Celine? You’re a bit… mussed.” Steve rubbed a hand over the back of his neck, a light blush of colour rising in his cheeks.

It hit her as being one of the most adorable things she’d ever seen. The big, strong soldier turning shy on her. She nodded, and they moved together before she could say any more to take her cases into the bedroom where she watched them toss them on the bed like they weighed nothing. The action caused the flare of desire to hit her a third time. Their strength was highly attractive.

When her hair fell forward over her shoulder, she glanced at it, noticed the way it was beginning to go from straight to wavy, and took a firm grip on her libido.

Working with these two could prove to be difficult.

She focused on her breathing, calming her rising sensuality and dialled back on her appeal until the wave fell out of her hair. When she looked up, she found them watching her. “What?”

“Something wrong?” Bucky asked.

She took the shades which still rode her head out of her hair and tilted her chin up as she set them on the dresser. “Not that I am aware of. If you gentlemen will excuse me.” She motioned toward the door.

They exchanged another one of those looks before they left, shutting her in the room alone. Clearly, they knew each other very well as that silent form of communication was powerful. Their auras fluctuated in concert with one another, showing deep friendship and loyalty. Steve and Bucky were brothers in the truest sense of the word. Related by blood or not, they were bound together at the deepest level. She’d only ever seen such connection in twins.

Celine walked gingerly across the room, proud of herself for holding it together as well as she had been. She wasn’t fine after getting hit by the truck. She had expended an enormous amount of energy to keep herself safe, but she hadn’t been fast enough. She had lied when she’d said she didn’t need to feed for a few days. She needed to feed now and eating with the team would do nothing but prolong her agony. Tonight, she needed to get out. Hunt. Appease the pain in her middle before anyone noticed.

Opening her case, she pulled out a loose, emerald green dress, stripped off her clothes, and walked naked into the bathroom where she lifted her hair and turned to see her back. Bruises ran the length of her spine and more covered her hip where the truck had connected. “Fuck,” she hissed softly, aware of the powerful ears of the super soldiers beyond the door. This was not good.

Celine pulled the sundress over her head. It floated down around her. Its handkerchief hem swirling in points about her calves. Spaghetti straps held it up, the silk clinging to her curves and highlighting her breasts and returned to the bedroom for a short-sleeved sweater. It didn’t seem to matter what she wore, everything screamed sex due to her nature, but the light cardigan adequately covered the bruises on her upper back. Still, she left her hair down, adding another layer of protection to make it through the next few hours.

Before opening the door, she knelt to the floor and pressed her hand to the carpet, allowing her consciousness to flow down. She sought out anyone nearby she could extract a little chi from to get through dinner, but there was no one close enough except for those upon this floor. The building fairly hummed with life, but there were too many floors between her and them.

Gritting her teeth, Celine pushed to her feet, pasted on a smile, and walked out of the bedroom. She would do dinner, show no weakness, then see about getting out of here for a few hours.

***

Dinner had been far harder than she'd expected. Especially as she never did get to eat.

Wanda had pulled her aside the moment the three of them appeared, apologizing profusely for her part in what had happened. The contrition and guilt in the Scarlet Witch’s aura proved her words true.

Celine had accepted graciously, assuring Wanda there were no hard feelings. She was merely doing what had been asked of her.

Bruce had approached afterward, having heard from Steve and Bucky about her run-in with the truck. He'd bombarded her with questions, getting rather intense as his excitement in her uniqueness grew.

She was saved by, of all people, Stark, who took her by the elbow and overrode every protest Bruce made.

Tony had tugged her across the room, seating her at the bar where he'd flirted, being both contrite and condescending, his emotions and aura showing what he really felt for her. He was wary. He didn't trust she wasn't there to cause problems. He wasn't sure this alliance would work or was a good idea. And, though he looked at her and lusted, she was inhuman, the term the Avengers had been using for a mutant.

How right he was.

She was inhuman. So far removed from humanity they had now become her food source.

When he grew even more intense than Bruce had been, his snide, backhanded compliments beginning to sting, Celine lightly placed her hand on his, leaned forward and turned on her appeal. “I find you to be a highly condescending, swine of a man. As an empath, it is impossible to lie to me. Your false compliments and fake apology leave a foul taste in my mouth. You do not like, nor trust me. Fine. I am here at the request of Charles. His wishes mean far more to me than yours. You do not wish to take my word for it, but I mean this team no harm. I am here to work with you, but if you continue to work against me, I will not hesitate to knock you on your ass… Iron Man.”

He’d blinked a few times when the fog of lust she’d built around him evaporated, and the words she’d spoken registered. Then, surprisingly, he’d laughed. What negative emotions had warred in his aura changed, and the suspicion disappeared.

“About time you stood up for yourself.” He’d patted her hand and walked away, leaving her seat at the bar in shock.

It had been a test. How in the hell had he managed to make his aura appear so…? Her eyes drifted to the Scarlet Witch.

Wanda looked very guilty.

Rising from the bar stool, Celine stalked through the exterior doors. She was livid! They couldn’t probe her mind, so they devised another test to see if she was what she claimed to be.

How quaint! How contrite! How.... ingenious.

She couldn't stay mad when it truly had been a brilliant bit of manipulation and sighed when she walked to the railing to look out over the dark city. All the life which flowed below called to her. She could practically taste it.

“Natasha,” Celine murmured, not bothering to look at the woman who sidled up beside her.

The redhead studied her for a long moment. “What are you?”

Celine cocked her head. “What do you mean?”

“An Energy Vampire you said, but what you just did to Tony had nothing to do with chi.”

Observant. Spy.

Celine blinked slowly, continuing to hold the muted green gaze of the woman. “He was being rude. I simply set him straight.”

Her brow arched, disbelief coating her features. “Can you mesmerize people like in the vampire legends?”

Celine closed both hands over the guardrail. “Not in the way you are thinking.” She could alter memories of herself for those she'd fed on, and she could whip them into such a frenzied need, such a pool of lust they would walk off the edge of the building if she commanded it, but she could not take over their mind with a look. Once she let them go, their mind was theirs again.

Natasha stepped closer, the suspicion on her turning her aura into a beacon of red, blue, and yellow pulsing light.

Hunger had Celine’s hands clenching.

“I’m telling you right now, you do anything to endanger this team, I’ll gut you like a fish.”

“You are welcome to try, Widow, but you do not yet know who you are up against,” Celine warned.

“Why don’t you tell me then?” The muted green had turned harsh, challenging.

Celine hated being challenged. She knew exactly who she was, but if the Widow was so curious... “My name is Celine Ena. It was given to me by Charles when I was fifteen. It means fiery moon for darkness is my bedmate and the fire of chi my lifeblood.” Her skin began to glow, shimmer with her power as her hair began to curl. “Energy vampire was the moniker give me by the children I grew up with when their fear of me became great.” Natasha’s eyes widened, and Celine knew hers had begun to glimmer and spark with gold as the amber lightened in her irises. “But my chosen name, my X-men name, is known only to a select few.” Leaning down, she whispered near Natasha’s ear.

The redhead stumbled back away from her, and Celine straightened slowly.

“You hurt anyone on this team…” Natasha trailed off.

“Why would I hurt my own team? I have already told you, I do not feed on teammates. Steve, Bucky, and Peter have been most welcoming and kind.”

“And the rest of us?”

“You have shown me only fear and distrust. I will do my job, be here, work as part of this team, but I cannot change the minds of those who see me only as a monster. Who look at me with hate and disgust as you currently do. I am what I am. I had no choice in the matter. Yet, you would see me caged and collared because of something which was not my doing.” Celine sighed. “It matters not. I am here, and until Charles calls me home, I will stay.” She walked away, heading around the side of the building.

“Where are you going?” Natasha called.

“I require a walk. I do not require food.” And she was done dealing with people who saw her as a threat, or an experiment, or a challenge.

“You can’t leave.”

She jerked to a stop and peered through narrowed eyes over her shoulder. “Excuse me?”

“Didn’t Steve tell you? It was the deal made. You won’t let Wanda vet you, you have to stay where we can keep an eye on you. You’re on house arrest, Celine, until we’re satisfied we can trust you.”

She slowly closed her fists. Here, now, was the catch Steve had, indeed, failed to mention. What the hell was she going to do? “I see.” Celine headed back through the doors to the interior of the building and straight for the elevator.

“Celine?” Steve called out, jogging over with a smile on his face. “Where are you going?”

“As I’m being treated like a teenager, I thought I would go sulk in my room like one,” she snapped.

He had the decency to flinch. “Yeah, sorry about that. I meant to tell you, but… stuff happened.”

She shook her head. “I will not say it is fine. It isn’t. You treat me like an enemy. The fox who has snuck into the hen house. I mean none of you harm, yet you persist in testing me, probing at me, treating me as a thing to be mistrusted. I am a person, no matter how much my mutation has taken from me!” When he tried to take her arm, she jerked away, raked her gaze over the group in general, and walked out, getting on the elevator to return to her room.

Only once the doors closed did she lean against the wall and allow the single, heart-wrenching sob to slip from her lips. “Why, Charles? Why did you have to send... me?”

She was so tired of being hated and feared and loathed.

So very tired.

***

Bucky stormed over to Steve. “What the fuck just happened?”

“I don’t know, but I’m sure as hell going to find out.” Steve glared at Natasha as he stomped across the room. “What did you say to her?”

She didn’t even twitch in the face of his rage. “Standard greeting.”

“In other words, you threatened her. God damn it, Natasha!” Steve barked. “We’re trying to improve relations, not start a war!”

Her face closed down. “I’m not the one you need to be concerned with!”

“Celine is part of this team!”

“She shouldn’t be!” Natasha snarled.

Stunned, Steve took an involuntary step back. “Since when did you become so cynical?”

“Since I found out who she really is!” She pushed past Steve to look at the rest of them. “We should be sending her packing with a thanks, no thanks, back to Xavier.”

“Natalia! What the fuck’s wrong with you? Celine is nice. At least give her a chance,” Bucky stated.

She sneered at him. “You don’t get it.”

“Don’t get what?” asked Steve.

“She’s not just a Qi Manipulator or an Energy Vampire. She’s so much more, and you two are letting her live in the lion’s den!”

“Natalia, ob"yasnis'!” Bucky snapped.

“Explain myself? Sure, Barnes. I’ll explain myself. She’s the one they call Styx!”

The only one to react was Clint who sat straight up. “She’s Styx?”

“What is a Sticks?” asked Thor.

A frustrated growl left Nat’s chest. “None of you read the files on the X-men, did you?”

“I read it, but I don’t remember a Sticks,” Bucky grumbled.

“Nor I,” said Wanda.

“Styx, like the river goddess of ancient Greek mythology. The mutant whose moniker is denoted by that name is said to be called this name because all life flows through her. She is, essentially, the gateway to the afterlife.” Vision recited.

“That’s it?” Steve asked.

“Styx has remained a mystery for most of her existence as an X-men. She prefers to work alone, under cover of darkness. It is said only that she can sweep a building within minutes, leaving behind severely weakened or dead agents in her wake. It is said she can look at a man and see his life, his soul, then she chooses. Life… or death.”

“Cool.”

They all turned to look at Scott.

“What?” he shrugged a shoulder. “If she’s so powerful, isn’t it better to have her on our side instead of against it?”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this,” Sam sighed, shaking his head, “but the bug is right. She seems nice enough, maybe a little cool, but we haven’t exactly been welcoming either.”

“She’s lonely.” Wanda looked away when all eyes swung to her. “I could pick up her emotions a little when she was speaking with Tony.”

“Wanda’s right. Celine expected us to turn on her. It’s what everyone does. She said as much when she was with Peter and me in the park. This shit right here,” Bucky motioned to the room, “is fucked up. We’re supposed to a team, but all some of you have done is make her feel like shit. Well done.” Turning on his heel, Bucky walked away.

“Someone’s smitten,” Natasha snorted.

“Nat,” Steve said, waiting for her to look at him. “You’re acting like a bitch.” Her eyes widened as the others gasped. “You got issues? You got insecurities? You got a problem with her being here? Then solve it, because Celine is going to be here for the foreseeable future. Xavier wants this to work, I want this to work, and Stark you were pushing for it too. Stop testing her!” He glared at Tony.

“I’d just feel better if Wanda could…” Tony sighed, flicking a wrist in dismissal. “I’ll fix it.”

“Good.” Steve looked around the room at all the contrite faces. “She’s here. She’s staying. Get it together.” Without another word, he followed Bucky out of the room.

Next Chapter

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