#which is like. honestly cool but it's overwhelming at first when u dont know who to follow
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sapphroditewrites · 1 year ago
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well i have 4 bluesky codes does anybody want to join bluesky LMAO it's dry ill admit but we can start our own lil marvel circle if u want??
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HI ITS ME gvxzggsgjfh ok look this is. i know this is a weird one it is SO specific and so obviously something i should just write myself if i want it👏but👏but👏BUT i decided to shoot my shot when a perfect chance has arisenderised for you to pick and choose from anything you like AND in any form, and to see if this one maybe by any chance just so happens to spark anything fun in u too xD
ssssssssssoooooooooooooooooooooo RANDOM EVENT ROLL D20 mc gets bitten by a werewoof or some other kind of "contagious" monster species (....cant really think of anything else other than vampirs, now that i say it) but WAIT THERES MORE because. what if mc insisted that they dont want any potential existent cures, they just wanna stay monstery >:3 JVDTHGLN who's considering it, who would absolutely go in the "its either me or this" direction, who's enthusiastic🤣 this is silly as hell but in the case it sparks joy id love to hear ur any and all thoughts because this idea has been haunting me for forever lmao honestly the best way ive imagined it is like one of your own selfinsert pieces youve posted before where its just all of them together bickering heeheehee💘💕🩷💞💖
love u have fun!!
The Arcana Drabble: MC transforms into a "monster"
In the spirit of things, I though a long drabble/short oneshot would work best to keep the madness going XD
Asra's getting stuck in their "one focus and one focus only" mode and right now that focus is making sure you're okay. He'll decide how he feels later, which isn't being helped at all because Julian keeps calling on him to help him slow down the process and get you to think about this a little more. However, it's hard to tell what exactly Julian wants your decision to be because in between him trying to get Asra to make you think about it some more, he's having all kinds of medical epiphanies about how your anatomy is adjusting to the new monster form:
"MC, let's think about some more, shall we? I'm sure Asra agrees with me - don't you, Asra? Asr - oh, whats this?! Your finger's joints are rapidly adjusting to accommodate for - I need a pen and paper -"
"Right here, Ilya." It's Portia's dismissive tone as she digs a small notebook and pencil out of her pocket that keeps you grounded. Not for long, though, because she can't wait to see what happens next. "Accommodate for what, anyways? Are you growing another joint?? Are you going to get claws??? Talons???? Show me!"
Between Julian jotting down unintelligible notes while he studies your elbow's range of motion, Portia's excited exclamations, and Asra's attempt at soothing touch as they rub your shoulders and ask how you're feeling, it's a miracle you can notice Muriel's quiet mumble in the background. He's clearly overwhelmed and very concerned that the physically-altering substance in general got to your brain first, making you so seemingly okay with turning into a monster.
"MC, do you remember your name? Do you need to take a nap? You don't have to be okay with this -"
"I believe this may warrant far more than a nap to recover from." Nadia's doing her best to keep Lucio calm, holding him back from tackling you much like she might grasp a leash. You can practically see the headache building behind her eyes. "We have yet to determine what the extent of this transformation is and therefore whether our dear MC is even capable of fully agreeing to the current process. MC, darling, did the source of this transformation give you any indication of what the end result would be?"
You'd try to respond, but Lucio's excited yelling is too noisy to shout over. He's fumbling at the fastenings on his cape, distracted by your ongoing changes, and very annoyed at Nadia's interference.
"Where did it go? I want to see if it can give me powers too - OW! Dammit, Noddy, I'm trying to help here! You're keeping me from finding the monster and getting it to give me cool - I mean, getting it to tell us more about what's happening! Don't you want that? Don't you want to help MC, Noddy?! Let me go -"
It's with a loud RIP and subsequent "that was velvet, you know!" that Lucio finally breaks free and sprints off in the direction of your new monster friend. You can feel yourself slowly settling in to your new form as the process shows signs of slowing and reaching completion.
Nadia's facepalming. Portia's looking at you with eyes shining in wonder. Julian's still trying to nag Asra into reversing this as he takes notes. The magician in question is still ignoring him as they ask you how you feel for the nth time. Muriel's eyeing the nearby closet in hopes of taking a nap and waking up to it all being a dream. Lucio's a distant, spiky golden speck at this point.
Faust is quietly trying to sneak her knife into your hand, for crimes.
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fyodoro · 2 years ago
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HII! i've been into dance moms lately help😭 can i req akito , toya, and rui (separatly) w a fem s/o who was on dance moms? if u dont wanna write this thats ok hehe have a good day!
-> 𝐃𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞, 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞, 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞!
You felt a lot of indifference towards your past position, but they’re always there to tell you you’re more than your past
With Akito Shinonome, Toya Aoyagi and Rui Kanishiro
Cw! Mentions of past trauma, yelling, implied past anxiety attacks, self sabotage (kinda), you punch rui!!!! | fluff (akito’s), comfort (toya’s), Angst to fluff (rui’s)
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Akito Shinonome
When Akito first met you, he knew he’s seen you somewhere before. He just couldn’t put his finger on it, but knew you were a familiar face. It wasn’t until one fateful day Ena woke up earlier than usual and put something on the family TV.
He recognized your face instantly, and everything fell into place. ‘You looked so familiar because Ena would watch you all the time on TV.’
A scoff escaped the ginger’s lips, how could he forget that? Although, you have changed quite a bit since you stopped appearing on the show. The version of you practicing on the television now is so tiny compared to who you are now. Both mentally and physically.
“You’ve been a little too interested in Dance Moms Akito, you feeling okay?” Ena said teasingly. It’s not often she saw her brother paying attention to something like that.
“I’m fine. Hey- does it really matter what I watch and don’t watch?” Ena laughed at his remark, brushing him off and sending him to the Cheesecake shop they both like to pick a slice up for her.
The younger rolled his eyes in annoyance at her request, but did so anyway. At least he could get a slice for himself.
The walk was just like any other, gripping the money tightly in his pocket and only focusing on his destination. Well, that was Akito’s main focus. Coincidentally, he just so happened to see your face in the crowd. It took him a moment to recognize that it was the current you. After all, he just finished watching your younger self on an old show.
There was a silent debate in his head on whether he should go up to you or not. ‘Wouldn’t that be creepy?’ He thought. But it’s not like he’s a stranger to you… you couldn’t mind too much, right? Before he could finish the debate, the boy found himself walking your way already.
“Oh, Akito? I didn’t know you came around these parts. What’s up?” The small smile on your face felt a little forced, but Akito paid no mind to it.
“I could say the same to you, I didn’t think someone like you would come to such a crowded area.”
His words rang in your head a bit, ‘someone like me?’ You thought. While you didn’t want to acknowledge it, you knew what he was talking about. ‘I guess I can’t keep it a secret for too long to anyone.’
“Oh well you know, it’s been so long since I dropped out the show. Not many people recognize me anymore. Which actually, I’m pretty grateful for.” You said. While you liked the attention for a bit, it got overwhelming fast. Learning how to keep up with fake fronts to strangers was exhausting, though Akito didn’t seem to mind the natural you.
“Yeah, I only realized it was you when my sister put one of your episodes on earlier. But it’s cool, you’re still (Name) at the end of the day.”
Something about his words were comforting. At the end of the day, you were just a regular person. It felt nice to have someone acknowledge that without putting you on a pedestal.
“Hey, where were you heading?” You asked. Partly out of genuine curiosity, and partly out of wishful thinking. Maybe you can tag along with him.
“The bakery, I’m picking up some cheesecake for me and my sister. She sends me on these errands a lot.” He scratched the back of his head a bit. One thing you both had in common? Keeping up a fake appearance in front of certain people.
“Oh, I know the bakery your talking about, I love it there! Can I come with you, perhaps?” Honestly, you just wanted to get out of the crowded plaza. Otherwise if someone recognized you here, you’d be too exhausted to do anything for the rest of the day.
Akito didn’t mind one bit. He sensed some desperation in your voice, and assumed what you were thinking. There was a mutual understanding that both of you were trying to make yourselves look good right now.
He wouldn’t mind getting to know the other side of your personality a lot better.
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Toya Aoyagi
Toya wouldn’t have known who you were until An pointed it out. He wasn’t aloud much television or internet access as a kid, and when he was, it was always monitored. So to say he was clueless would be an understatement.
It didn’t help that An was so casual about it, just casually saying;
“You see that student? They were on this show I used to watch as a kid, Dance Moms, isn’t it so cool she goes to our school?”
When Toya hears this, he thinks it might have been an idol show, and you were a former idol. It wouldn’t be anything new for An to be so normal about being acquainted with a popular figure. The dual hair boy let his curiosity get the best of him and looked up this… “Dance Moms.”
He only watched the episodes you were in, trying to understand where your coming from and what made you so special. Though when he finished, he felt more worried about you than he’d have liked.
Watching you get screamed at over messing up precise steps, seeing you get belittled to put other dancers up, it looked traumatic. He could understand why you dropped out of the show, the experience didn’t seem like a pleasant one.
The next day, seeing you in the halls felt… different. He just watched a big chunk of your childhood, and now he has to act like he doesn’t know a thing about you. Surely you wouldn’t like to be talked to cause you were on such a exploiting show as a kid? With each passing period, he noticed you more and more.
But seeing you alone throughout the day made the boy feel bad. Did you choose to be alone? Did others avoid you because of how they watched you get screamed at so much as a kid? He wasn’t sure. But he was sure something in him made him take a seat next to you on a bench.
The silence was awkward and the tension felt thick. ‘I definitely should have thought this through.’ He thinks. He clears his throat, getting ready to speak before you ended up speaking first.
“What do you want? Come here to tell me how bad of a dancer I was on that show?” Your voice was laced with disgust, emphasizing that disgust even more when you mentioned “that show.”
While Toya was no expert on dancing, he knew that your dancing wasn’t bad at all. Sure, you might have screwed up a few moves. But didn’t everyone? Yours just so happened to get more shunned than any others did.
“No, actually. I’ve seen you alone a lot, and everyone could use some company.” He said sincerely. He knew bringing up your status wasn’t a good idea, and avoided mentioning it. You appreciated that, but only a bit.
You looked frustrated. ‘Why would you be frustrated?’ He thinks to himself. He would understand being upset, or even a bit annoyed. But frustration felt like an odd emotion to feel in this situation. To him, at least.
“You’re just going to try and get close to me, get a little bit popular, and leave with that popularity. That’s what they all do, I assume you’re no different from them. Maybe your double colored hair represents how two faced you are.” That’s a bold claim…
He began piecing the puzzle together. You were always alone because you distanced yourself from everyone, and you had a fear. It made sense now, the fear of being used was a scary one to him. At the same time, he wants you to see having real friends is important, much better than being alone.
“In that case, could I prove to you I’m not… ‘two-faced’?” He asked. You almost choked on your spit at that. Why would he want to prove anything to you?
“If you try hard enough, maybe. I can’t be fooled easily by whatever your going to do.” There was a trace of amusement in your voice, as if this was the first time you’ve heard a funny joke. But with that amusement also came bitterness.
Toya made a pact with himself, and a silent pact with you. He would do whatever it took to show you having friends isn’t so bad, as long as you find the real ones. And he’s okay with being your first real friend.
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Rui Kamishiro
Rui was sure he was mistaken. Someone so talented- popular- someone with such a clean reputation… wants to be with him? He couldn’t believe it.
For a moment, he thought of putting distance between the two of you. Someone like you shouldn’t be around someone like him. People would surely get the wrong idea, and then you’d lose everything. He didn’t want that for you, not at all.
The best way to avoid that outcome?
Distancing himself.
The tall alchemist almost felt like he was in junior high again. The way he pushed you away was all too familiar to the way he pushed Nene away, and he hated it. But, this was for your own good.
At least, that’s what he wanted to believe.
He found it difficult to keep you away. After class ends, you’re always running up to him with lit up eyes. It was a subtle part of his day that he didn’t realize he loved so much, he missed it.
Now he had to ignore that light and walk directly to the next class. It hurt, but he paid no mind to it. You were probably doing just as well, if not, better, without him.
Though that wasn’t the case at all.
In your eyes, Rui had left you alone in the dark. There was no explanation for the sudden cut off, there was no sign of it beforehand. It had you running in circles in your mind. ‘What could I have possibly done?’ You thought.
You attempted to confront him, multiple times in fact. But every time he sees you, he scurries away hastily. Apart of you wanted to slap him across the face, but the other part just wanted to break down in front of him and beg for an explanation.
You two were practically best friends before all this. He helped you out of being crowded by old fans and was like a bodyguard at times. Rui never cared about the person you used to be, he only cared about the person you are now. It meant a lot to you.
But now it seems he’s forgotten all about that.
You needed to corner him if you wanted an explanation. He had to be alone with no excuse to just “go away.” You just had to catch him at that perfect time. Even if it takes awhile, you’ll wait as long as you need for him.
A few days went by with 0 luck. The only time you saw an opening, he started messing with two underclassmen. One looked like he was about to snap Rui’s neck while the other was keeping him from doing so. It was an amusing sight, and you were happy to see Rui in his element. Even if you wish those two underclassmen went another way.
Making your way to the vending machines, you spotted the familiar purple haired boy fiddling with the buttons. A look of irritation plastered on his face as he begins to shake the machine from the sides.
‘Ah, something must have gotten stuck.’ You thought. This wasn’t an opportunity you could miss, it was too good. You walk up to Rui and the vending machine, helping him shake it a bit more vigorously before the soda candy finally dropped. He bent down to open the slot and retrieve his snack, and then turned to you.
“Why thank… you..” A face of realization flashed across his face. ‘Theres no way out of this one.’ He thought.
“Rui.”
“(Name)…”
Rui looked at everything except you, trying his hardest not to crack open. What could you possibly want from him that’ll put your reputation at risk?
“Can you tell me? Tell me what I did. You stopped talking to me out of no where, and keep avoiding me! Do you have any idea how hard I’ve been trying to talk to you?” Your voice cracked a bit. There was a deep sense of desperation in your voice that only a fool could miss, and Rui was no fool.
“I just thought you’d be better without me (Name). You’re talented, beautiful, and most of all, a good person. If people see you with me they’re going to think you’re a weirdo like me.” He never realized how dumb his idea sounded until he said it out loud. He wanted to distance himself because you were more important than him? ‘Pathetic of me…’ he thinks.
A silence coated the two of you, and the last thing you wanted was to indulge in it. This whole time… he was avoiding you because of your reputation? Because he didn’t want to ruin your reputation just by being around you? You wanted to laugh.
“I hope you know how happy I am being your friend. You don’t water me down to “a previous dancer on television” and you never did. I always appreciated that and I just- I just want to keep being with you Rui.” This time you couldn’t stop the voice cracks, or the lone tears falling down your cheeks.
Like all the times before, Rui pulled down his sleeve and wiped your tears. His gesture made your heart melt like it always did. He couldn’t stand seeing you cry, it was only worse you were crying because of him.
“I’m sorry (Name), if I had known… I would have stayed with you. I won’t let a mistake like this happen again, I promise.” His tone was sincere and gentle. His hands still on your cheeks from wiping your tears, it was a moment you could stay in forever.
But you weren’t going to forget what he did that easily, no matter the reason. You pulled away and punched his shoulder a little harsher than intended. He yelped in brief pain, clutching his shoulder.
“What was that for??!” He nearly laughed, but refused to give you the reaction you wanted.
“That was for leaving me in the dust for days! Do it again, and it’ll be worse.”
Rui didn’t wanna know what that meant, and deepened the promise he made in his head SK he would certainly never do that again.
Despite the stinging pain he felt, he smiled.
‘I really missed this..’
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hyunsvngs · 1 year ago
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okay my 🧅s on a/b/o incoming and i warn u its kinda long bc im insane so yall are getting this in two parts so u can feel free to like take part 2 and put it under here or smth! i do have to preface i have a sensitive sense of smell and a lot of scents make me nauseous so i don't think of them on first thought
so hyung line first!
Chan: i honestly agree with the ocean/sea breeze, i mean, of course aussie boy who swims smells like the ocean. BUT i also think that like bc scents shift around some that also rainfall/petrichor also falls into his scent, and that like when hes pissed off its like a thunderstorm
BUT! THERES MORE! so when i read fics i have read chan as an omega in fic bc i think it's fascinating the duality of writing. i feel like sea breeze is universal but i have a heavy bias for something sweet and strong like vanilla and bergamot. i think people have said his cologne smells like this? which, cool. mf could smell like a sweet cheesecake and ill eat him up. but also like, i also see him as pack luna(?) so like the idea of like intimidating people off with like a strong heavy burnt cream with an undertone of light citrus or nuttiness in his scent is kinda funny but like, he'd still be intimidating,
lino: okay SO i usually see lino as a beta but as the stats show, he's all over the place. i think in particular from a fic i read, mint stuck with me, and i think that's a very, stark, standout smell. like mint can be cool and calming but also overwhelming. i think scents like that work. I could see like, raspberry ish /grapefruit/basil/ really strong stark scents that can easily be overwhelming, as something for him. i think you guys said chocolate but i dont think thats stark enough. maybe like, orange chocolate, cherry chocolate? i think it really works for any designation BUT i did see one fic say with minho as an omega, magnolia, which i was like woah wow thats a good one but i think he needs more starkness to his scent. i think it just suits him so well.
changbin: OKAY SO changbin is hard to place bc part of me thinks he just smells really clean and like a bit like sweat, which can be nice when its just, clean and soapy. i feel like he tends to get kinda heavier woodsy scents, like sandalwood, teakwood, pine. which i think works. i think i also associated like, amber, which i think also falls under the woodsy scent. i had to go and look it up and one fic i read recently gave omega changbin a cherry scent which had me like hmmmmmmm, maybe. i feel like changbin just smells really good no matter what, and maybe i like the woodsy deeper scents bc thats what my cologne smells like, i do like that teakwood. i do also vibe with it bc upset hed end up smelling like charcoal or a campfire? which personally i love the smell of campfires, makes me feel all warm and cozy.
hyunjin: okay so floral scents all the way. rose, magnolia, lavender, cherry blossom. i definitely think he smells like a meadow, maybe a hint of citrus or fruit right underneath it. fresh, calming, relaxing. maybe also with a hint of rain in it. another one where i dont read enough in any designation to know if i lean certain ways with particular scents but floral all the way with hyunjin. i need to pay more attention when i read!
part 1/2 :) -dream anon
WOWWW OKAY. sooo i really love the idea of chan as pack luna that is INSANE. i can’t believe i didnt think of that i lurv it
and minho with cherry chocolate smell.. thats SO true oh god. okay let me post ur second one and everyone can let us know our 🧅s
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actualbird · 3 years ago
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Oh god!
I really love the poly headcanons they are so sweet.... (or don't but that's part of it and i think the tot boys+MC deserve all the love the world has to give).
But, liking it or not, our 4 beloved boys are kinda complicated (that's what makes them perfect). Plus I never thought about how people get in poly relationships. So i was thinking, how do you think they all get into a polyrelationship together?
(I really have no idea of how that would happen)
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hi, two anons!! im glad you guys liked my nxx team polycule stuff!! i'll answer these in one go, my "headcanon" (in quotes because i think this kinda turned into a character analysis/minific of sorts HAHA) being what first anon asked, How They Get Together.
heads up, wc of this is 1.9k words long so buckle up for a bit of a read jfsjdfkjbf
because first anon, youre right!!! the boys are stupendously complicated which i love so so much but canon has also shown us clearly that each of the boys' quirks and habits and tendencies causes a lot of (mostly played for laughs) friction. the bickering, the backhanded insults, the "im the best one here" preening contests. theyre all SOOOO RIDICULOUS and it is hilarious but yep! the boys r complex!! and that means this beautiful ship, imo, has a lot of phases to get to the actual romantic relationship bit.
how they get together, in my opinion, starts because of mc.
not in the sense that she matchmakes them all, but like.
phase 1 of the nxx team polycule is this:
through being in love with her (which we all know the boys 100% are), each of the boys come to terms with their own flaws and weaknesses. it's very apparent to me in all the story thus far that these boys are flawed as hell, it's very compelling but even more compelling to me is how all of them also do intense mental gymnastics to Not Confront Those Flaws. like, marius is a dickbag always teasing and toeing the line of insincerity, vyn is a controlling mf who always tries to sway situations to his benefit, artem is so repressed to the point that he has genuine trouble with emotions, luke is a self sacrificial bastard and also a huge hypocrite about how no, actually, hes the only one that should be hiding his pain and being dishonest, no dishonesty from other people!! in the beginning of the story, all the boys have their flaws and seem to have just kinda...not addressed how those flaws are harming them and the people around them.
and then mc rolls around and they all fall in love with her. and she sees those flaws and she doesnt let them slide. she challenges the boys in her own ways to see another side of the situation, to acknowledge what theyre doing. she doesnt want to get rid of flaws, thats impossible and also not cool. she just has this beautiful hope for like, all of humanity, that goodness can prevail with the right work. so when she sees her beloved nxx boys, she believes that for them as well.
which leads to phase 2 of the nxx team polycule:
the boys, more aware of themselves, become more aware of each other.
they werent Unaware of the others of course. it's just that they didnt like...truly connect on a personal level just yet. they saw the other teammembers with their emotional armor and flaws and saw a wall that wasnt worth looking past.
but after mc makes them realize that hey, flaws arent the end of the world actually, it's alright and the person behind them may just be worth it, the boys like. end up understanding the others. A LOT OF THIS BIT IS UNINTENTIONAL, ON THEIR PARTS KJDSBFS. like they stumble into understanding each other by accident, they didnt plan it, but over the course of nxx investigations, it's inevitable that they end up seeing the depths of the others. i delve into this a little bit in my fanfic "filler eps of the lost gold" where the boys are just going thru their actions and then trip over another boy's fears or desires and through that, gain a deeper understanding mutually.
and with understanding, sometimes, comes trust.
phase 3 of the nxx team polycule goes like this:
everybody in this team, whether they like it or not, whether they know it or not, has a heart that wants to give love so desperately.
marius lives in a world full of snakes so he cant have his heart on his sleeve for his own protection. vyn wants to be seen as perfect and the heart is inherently messy so he holds it back. artem for a very very long time was focused on work and success and achievement that he neglected his heart. and luke has been giving love all his life in a sense but in a way thats hidden.
all these tendencies that are brought upon their life circumstances results in this: they want to love honestly but they havent been able to do this
until mc. and all of them want to push back whatever fears or patterns their life has instilled in them because they see her and see somebody so unwaveringly good that all their hearts begin giving love to her to make her happy and to make themselves happy as well.
but heres the thing. the boys dont just see mc. by this point, they have connected and understood and come to trust each other as well, and the consequence of that is that They Can See Each Other Now Too, Truly.
and heres the thing. all of the boys are unwaveringly good as well.
one by one, each of the boys realize that what they feel for the other boys in the team starts to...change. yeah theyre all friends, they pick on each other a lot of the time, but the bedrock of the relationship is solid and strong now. but when marius is with luke, marius sees a light inside of luke so bright that he seems unaware that he gives off. when artem is with vyn, artem sees a goodness inside of vyn that hesitates to make itself obvious and known because vyn is scared of getting hurt thanks to it. all of them see the other and their goodness and, unbidden, their hearts want to give love to each other as well.
and because theyre all a bit stupid in their own way theyre like, huh, weird! wonder why this feeling is so familiar! and yet i cant seem to name it...and then they all independently compare these feeling with the feelings they have for mc, a feeling they do know the name of, and theyre like.
WAIT.
THESE FEELINGS ARE...VERY BASICALLY EXACTLY WHAT I FEEL FOR MC.
which only means one thing: theyve fallen in love with everybody else
marius: //goes to his studio to Think and sees that a bunch of his recent art actually had little crumbs of these feelings already, etched into the brushstrokes and scenes. has an emotional crisis about it
vyn: //records a 1 hour long entry in his audio diary to examine and gain control of his feelings but by the end of the hour all he knows is that he wants to hold these people and be held by them
artem: //quite literally just bluescreens, artem.exe has stopped working, sits at his study and slowly, slowly, thunks his head down onto his desk, valiantly trying to ignore the fast pulse of his heart
luke: //manically vents about it to peanut who, by virtue of being a bird, doesnt get it. just keeps talking at peanut to get a grasp of it all and then lies down on the floor, overwhelmed
mc, sitting in her apartment watching some netflix: ...why do i inexplicably feel as if something very, very important has just happened?
phase 4 of the nxx team polycule is basically:
pining: extreme difficulty level
because pining is already hard when ur pining for one person. what more for an additional 3 more people. and those additional 3 more people are pining back.
and all these boys are SOOOO OBVIOUS with their romantic feelings, in their own special way. the way they show their affection to mc starts to bleed into their interactions with the others and everybody can CLEARLY SEE WHAT IS GOING ON, LOL, but also all the boys are too chickenshit to confront it, because if they confront it, what will even happen??? being in love with each other, all of them, thats going to be such a complicated fucking relationship, holy shit. it's 2030, yeah, being a polyamorous group relationship isnt completely unheard of, but sue them, theyre scared.
but mc (who i forgot to mention already knows of the boys' romantic feelings for her, shes just hasnt made a move yet on any of them because SHES IN LOVE WITH ALL OF THEM AS WELL and shes been trying to figure out how the hell to make that work, she cant bear to choose just one of them, she'd be heartbroken over leaving the rest of them behind) sees that the nxx investigation team is now all pining for each other FULLY and she kinda wants to laugh when she realizes whats going on because like, what are the chances? that this would happen? that they all found each other and their feelings fell into just the right place for nobody to be left behind?
theyre all scared, she can tell. and she is as well, she wont lie.
but shes always had a belief that goodness can prevail with the right work.
and love is one of the greatest goods out there.
phase 5 of the nxx team polycule:
It's Time For Communication, Baby!!!!!
the exact scenes of how this happens is a bit vague to me. it could go two ways: mc going to each of the boys independently to talk about feelings, hers about everybodys and his about everybodys as well. OR they have a fucking meeting about it all together and artem literally schedules it in his google calendar, or something.
either way, they like, actually talk about this. starts casual, maybe over a chill date, maybe over dinner at a nice restaurant, maybe over a walk in the park as the sun is starting to set. but where ever it happens, the end result is the same: a heart is laid out bare and it is taken in gentle, grateful hands.
marius: OKAY, NOW THAT THE FEELINGS ARE OUT OF THE WAY, CAN I PLEASE KISS ONE OR ALL OF YOU, PLEASE, IVE BEEN WANTING TO KISS U GUYS FOR FOREVER
vyn, laughing fondly: has anybody ever told you patience is a virtue? we quite literally just talked it all out.
marius: //needy whining noises
artem, embarrassed: ive...never kissed anybody before
luke, embarrassed but trying to play it Cool: ....same here
mc: kissing is great, you two will love it!
marius: awesome, awesome, so is ANYBODY going to give me a go ahead or WHAT????
phase 6 of the nxx team polycule:
i dont want to say it's happily ever after, once they all get together. thats not really realistic.
they all have their quirks and tendencies and habits. and those will inevitable clash against each other. theyll have their arguments, theyll get upset, theyll sulk and be angry, sometimes. but also...
theyll see each other smile and feel like their love shining so brightly. theyll reach out for another's hand and be held in such a way that makes them think that their heart is in a safe place. theyll love each other and theyll put in the work to continue loving each other. because goodness will prevail.
and they all see each other as the most good people in the world.
so whatever happens, theyll get through it together.
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chironshorseass · 3 years ago
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I was reading some of your posts and you had pretty good takes, so I wanted to ask what you think about the whole 'Percy is a mary sue/gary stu' thing? I see a few people saying that too many characters fall for him, he's overpowered, he has no flaws, etc. What do you think?
tbh i had no idea this was a thing until I looked it up, and yep. there are people who legit think that percy is a mary sue which is hilarious. also there r some others who claim that annabeth and piper r mary sues?? that's also a thing but im less surprised abt that even tho they r clearly very wrong as well lmaoo
so let's see what makes a mary sue: according to this dictionary "Mary Sue is a term used to describe a fictional character, usually female, who is seen as too perfect and almost boring for lack of flaws, originally written as an idealized version of an author in fanfiction."
ok so it’s true that rick wrote percy to be….similar? to his son? or at least represent him. i’m not sure and frankly idc bc in the end, percy can’t exactly be considered to be the typical self insert who could do no wrong unlike *cough* paul *cough* because, what-ho he has flaws. lol. in tlt it is established that percy has anger issues. he easily gets in trouble and again, his emotions get the best of him. (tho him being a "troublemaker” is usually bc he's the type of dude who is There at the wrong place and at the wrong time. he's a demigod and he's blamed for everything but that's another matter.) with this said, he talks back at gabe knowing that it just makes his mom's life harder. this isn't coming from malicious intent, obviously, bc percy loves his mom. he just cant help himself and his hatred (which is valid obviously) is overwhelming. he has no filter when it comes to insults (tho a lot of his internal monologue he still keeps to himself), his self-esteem is crippling (probably has a lot to do with gabe) and anyone with reading comprehension can tell that he’s a little shit!!! a little shit who is also three dimensional!!! im so confused abt why they will say that percy is written with “no flaws” as if they have the best take ever. he literally strangled nico during tlo, and sure his anger was warranted, but nico was like. ten. and percy just kept choking him😭😭. i’m sorry but dude has flaws. i think mainly people confuse being fundamentally good-natured and being powerful with having no flaws and therefore boring. these two don’t necessarily correlate, and a well written character can and will have many aspects to them, not just the cool flashy powers. a well written character won’t be boring, and therefore, won’t be a mary sue. i think people forget that. percy is more than just a son of poseidon, the hero of olympus. he isn't perfect and he isn't meant to be, because he isn't a mary sue!!! he isn’t BORING!!! truly i could rant all day and make some other post abt his flaws but frankly not today. these people clearly dont know how to read lol.
on the topic of too many characters falling for him and his looks….honestly all of that felt very natural in the books? one, nico’s crush on percy isn’t canon until waay later so we as readers didn’t know he had one while reading pjo. nico admits that he had a crush in the first place bc he began to idealize percy, for who he is (and honestly it’s realistic, given nico was young and the person who saved him and his sister was percy). two, rachel fell for the idea of percy. of the world that he was part of—she literally says this shit. and they started out as friends, so, developing feelings is easy thru friendship. obviously percy jackson is a good person, and obviously rachel saw the best parts of him and went with it. then she promptly tells him something along the lines of “bye not interested. i figured out that i don’t rly like u exactly. i just liked the idea of u being part of this magical world” and that’s that. three, calypso also falls in love with the idea of him (btw there r many things wrong with this, but u know, another can of worms. yikes). she implies that it was his character (bravery, maybe?). four, annabeth starts off as his friend. she gets to know all of him, the good and the bad, and it doesn’t rly feel like, “oh, he’s perfect and awesome and sooo good looking. that’s why everyone wants to be with him.” no. on the surface, maybe??? idk this is maybe sugar coating a lot. but all these ppl “fall in love” with percy bc of different circumstances, and not necessarily bc of his looks/all of them except for annabeth don’t get to know him well at all. they don’t exactly know abt his flaws, and….obviously percy jackson is good looking. later on, he’s described as such. lol he’s the son of a greek god??? and yet. for most of pjo he’s described as short and scrawny?? bc he’s a kid? lol. another thing: his looks aren’t the most important thing abt him. in fact, it’s barely stated in the books. us as readers infer that he must be good looking bc of some throwaway comments and how poseidon is perceived as “handsome” and percy looks like poseidon. this is later on when he’s sixteen or whatever
ig, but again, not the most important part of him. not rly mary sue material if barely anyone acknowledges his looks.
tl;dr: percy jackson can’t be a mary sue bc he’s not boring: he has flaws as well as good qualities to him. his “good looks” aren’t important like they r in actual mary sue characters since they r barely mentioned. characters fall for him bc of different aspects of his character, not necessarily bc of the previous thing abt the “good looks.” PERCY JACKSON CANNOT BE A MARY SUE AND YALL CLEARLY CANT READ
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hella1975 · 3 years ago
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hi! laika anon here (i really couldve given u at least a little more warning tbh....laika is one of the few songs that has the power to make me cry no matter what mood im in) but music reccs!!- im gonna limit myself to 4 asks here because im REALLY tryna not be overwhelming/annoying.
ok so i def cannot promise anything with the same amount of gut punch that laika has but here are 5 songs that kind of tie into the animal theme-
gus the polar bear from central park (tragically hip): this is very much more rock type sound, but central theme is a captive bear who no longer frightens anyone, i really really love gord downies lyricism i think the man is brilliant tbh (if u vibe a little then "tired as fuck" and "ahead by a century" also hit)
peter the wildboy (ratboys): not about an animal per say but kind of like the way humans strip the beauty from things that are wild(?)
dead dogs (annie dirusso): this one is very much more laying all the cards in front of you. her dog is dead, shes praying and doesnt know why cause she doesnt think its gonna do anything, etc, etc. dirusso has a nice clear tone 2 her voice tho
putting the dog to sleep (the antlers): im not sure how much of this one is literally about putting a dog to sleep vs just metaphor but its pretty um uh its a cool song. yah.
space dog (tori amos): this is the most not fitting to the theme i'd say, its mostly just seemingly nonsense lyrics but i still find tori pretty compelling + yaknow- space dog
laika anon back for p2 of 4: songs about death in general warnings 4 big ouch :| (hope some of these r new 2 u!!)
matthew 25:21 (moutain goats): uhhh wow idk how he makes the like *im mostly talking barely singing not even really rhyming* thing work so well but boy does he ever- if u havnt heard it i dont wanna spoil anything but its so well structured(??) everything fits together so well-
seaweed (mount eerie): from an album about dealing with the loss of his wife it was between this one and real death- but i first heard this song and proceeded to sob for probably an hour.
casimir pulaski day (sufjan): ik fs uve heard this one, sufjan enjoys hurting feelings.
when i met death (right away great captain): less of a personal one, more just incredibly beautiful (imo) i cannot get over how he layers the vocals stg im like vibrating
ok laika anon second to last ask i PROMISE!! these songs are just ones i find powerful/moving imma include potential tws tho because there are some 4 sure
emotional anorexic (svavar knutur): a pretty apt painting of depression and how hard it can be to compare yourself to others, doesnt contain any language explicitly about eds
not an addict + my heart (k's choice): this band is two brothers (lead singer is trans masc) which is cool ASF, sam hadnt come out as trans during the run of most of if not all of k's choice, but you can pick up on the queer elements/themes in the music and its honestly just really beautiful stuff
me and a gun (tori amos): ok big cw here because this song is about tori's sa, its incredibly powerful- just her voice with no other backing music- honestly she is so- i dont really have words for it but i recommend listening to the song if you can
torn again (leonard cohen): cw mention of wrists in a potentially triggering way- i love lenny co- ik hes really not 4 everyone but imo this is him at his best.
nothing but heartache in your social life(gord downie): words words holy shit this man owned words- ide-
bonus picks: sun in my mouth björk, hollow life korn
laika anon LAST ASK WHOOOOO!!!! if u are ever looking to really make urself miserable- two projects i would recommend:
next to normal: you dont even have to watch the musical, pull up the genuis lyrics and read along- or dont tbh its still fuckin' POTENT. family unit made up of a mother, father, sister and an older brother only the mom can see- i have sobbed to this shit on at least 4 occaisons. not to mention the songs have such brilliant layering to them- my holy shit moment is always my psychopharmachologist and me- but i am the one guts the fck out of me
the secret path by gord downie- this is the story of a young boy who was stolen from his family during the (very long) period of time when canada forced its indigenous people into residential schools. downie's voice takes a little getting used to especially as he was pretty deep in the throes of cancer at this point- but god its truly a fucking soul destroying story- and one similar to so many others that have been covered up so effeciently by the canadian government-
laika anon i would like to start by saying that i have been listening to laika on repeat since you told me about it and i quite literally cannot get over it i think about it all the time it's rewritten my brain chemistry i am not okay at all.
thank you so much for these! your taste is exquisite and ive made a note to listen to all of these, but i also made a playlist for the whole laika/two-headed calf vibe and i used a lot of your recs as inspo, so thank you!
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fieldbears · 4 years ago
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It seems like you know a lot about skin care. I'm 28 now and honestly dont really bother with it (except to take off make up and using sunscreen). I'm 28 now and feel like my skin's fine but wonder if there's stuff it actually needs. With skincare being such a huge industry it's hard to understand what ingredients skin actually needs bc I feel companies (& influencers) try to sell you a lot of shit you don't need and maybe even makes your skin worse. Any tips where to start? Thank u
Hey friend! I love helping newbies. I absolutely do have tips. And a two-product two-step regimen. You can get it for under $40 and it should last you 6 months or more.
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First off, there is ABSOLUTELY a ton of shit you don’t need. That is a good instinct. You can always pay more for a product and you can always add more steps to your routine, but that doesn’t mean that you’re actually getting more out of it. The first thing you should ask yourself is, what do you want out of your skincare?
SUNSCREEN: For someone who isn’t sure what they want or what they should do, my first question is how much time you spend in the sun. The one thing you can do to really permanently damage your skin is to spend a lot of time in the sun without any sunscreen. Basically: blah blah rays of sun blah blah destroys the collagen, aka squishy bouncy bonds between cells, blah blah, destroyed collagen means the skin sags more, meaning wrinkles.
(It is also, I hope I don’t need to say, dangerous for Cancer Reasons to get a ton of non-screened sun exposure. But I’m assuming that’s a given here.)
Like I said in the last post, southeast Asian sunscreen options are a huge improvement on what you find on the shelves here in the States because they have more stringent laws on what chemicals are okay to put in a product. But if you stick with what you can grab at CVS, that’s fine too - just make sure you google the brand and type and make sure the SPF is for real. (Some products marketed at, say, SPF 45 are actually proven to only be SPF 15. It’s like the olive oil bullshit all over again!)
There are also a lot of moisturizers available with SPF protection in them.
WHICH LEADS ME TO MY AMAZING TWO-STEP SYSTEMMMMM...
CLEANSE AND MOISTURIZE: There are seven-step processes out there, but what you really need to start with, and will get a ton out of if you aren’t doing anything right now, is cleansing and moisturizing.
The science explanation for doing this: blah blah your skin generates oils from your pores in order to create a protective barrier between your flesh and the elements, but said oils can get gunky once they’ve accumulated all the particulates from the air, and there can even be backups and miscommunications and over-oilage if you have dead skin cells sitting on top of your new skin, or stuff gets all the way into your pores, blocking the system, causing breakouts. So skincare is about removing everything on top of your skin, maybe adding fancy stuff in the middle, but absolutely creating a new barrier for your skin at the end, to replace the one you took off. I liken it to varnish on a painting - it’s meant to sit on top, collect all the dust, and get removed and replaced over time. But don’t just wash your face every 20-80 years. The metaphor only goes so far. Anyway.
Here is how to get into my absolutely bare minimum regimen:
PICK A CLEANSER: If you wear/remove makeup a lot, and/or have a very oily complexion, pick an oil-based cleanser. Oil-based means it’s good at removing makeuppy things  and your natural oil. Otherwise, pick a water-based cleanser. CeraVe cleansers are available at Walgreens and they are affordable. It is available, affordable, clinically gentle on various skin types, and by god, it does indeed wash all the shit off your face.I have tried a lot of expensive water-based cleansers and I still come back to this one. That $16 pump bottle will last you a long time, too.
PICK A MOISTURIZER:  I’m back on my CeraVe shit here because if you’re overwhelmed and don’t know what to pick, I’m gonna push you to the easy-to-pay-for, easy-to-find product that won’t make you break out. And it’s got SPF! If you want to get fancier, check out some options here. I currently use Laneige moisturizers, which are at Sephora and... other places. Idk. (And to repeat my last post: if you can’t stand having things sitting on your skin, even a moisturizer that will absorb over a minute or so, Laneige Cream Skin Toner & Moisturizer essentially feels like water.)
SHOWER STEP: You have both your products. Now. Put your cleanser in your shower. When you shower, use it to wash your face. In the shower, you can splash and splash to your heart’s content. Get your neck, your cleavage, any extra places you feel have an oiliness problem. But remember them for later, because you want to moisturize all spots you cleansed. (Also, if you’ve been using soap or anything else to wash your face up until now... stop that. Cleanser is much better.)
AFTER SHOWER STEP: Dry off and pat on that moisturizer. Make sure you apply it with clean hands. Rub it in gently and make sure all cleansed areas are now moisturized.
That’s it.
No, really, that’s my advice for beginners. Two products, one done in the shower. You have to do them in order. That’s it.
If you have the spoons to do this routine twice a day, around when you get up and right before bed, you’ll get even better results. But if you’re just starting out and get anxious about new routines, don’t sweat it. Your face’s cells turn over every 30 days or so, so if you keep this up every day for about two weeks, you’ll start seeing improvements by then.
Bonus newb tips:
About once a week, use a COMPLETELY CLEAN terrycloth washcloth to apply your cleanser. Get your (gentle) scrub on. Mechanical exfoliation basically means you’re using a brush, a cloth, something physical to remove everything from your face, including things like dead skin, which gentle cleansing may not have gotten. Doing it too often isn’t helpful, as you can only build up so much stuff to remove over time, and scrubbing too hard or too frequently can lead to frightening your skin, causing redness. So once a week is likely plenty. If you like the battery-operated brushes, go for it, but they cost way more than the clean washcloth.
You will see options for chemical exfoliation too. If you identify as a newb, I don’t recommend this. Chemical exfoliations aren’t bad per se, but are one of the few skincare things that can be done wrong, and in a way that can really upset your skin. Washcloth!
Are you replacing your pillowcases on a regular basis? I try to do once a week but I probably end up with closer to two weeks. Nobody’s perfect. But remembering to do this is a very easy way to help your skin out.
If you get your cleanse-and-moisturize routine down pat, 2x a day, and you want the next step, look into toners. They help your skin absorb the moisturizer more efficiently... science reasons. The toner goes on before the moisturizer, but again, your skin should be dry before you start.
There are ampoules, essences, treatments, and other fancy names for... very specific shit. Basically, if you have a specific problem, especially in a specific area of your face, chances are there is a specific tiny expensive bottle you can integrate into the middle of your routine to help with that. But there is a lot of snake oil out there and I don’t want anybody buying these solutions if they aren’t already managing the daily wash-and-protect, because you’d be surprised how many things that can fix.
If you have problems with breakouts or other bad reactions to some skin products, do your best to only introduce one new product at a time. That way if you start having a reaction, you don’t have to guess what caused it.
No matter what is or isn’t going on with your skin, your worth is not affected one iota. Whether I have three pimples and incredible redness around my cheekbone and nose area, making me look like a character mug of a drunken sailor, or whether or my skin is the cool, poreless ivory of Grecian marble, I am still the exact same perfect bitch. And so are you.
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ringmyheart · 4 years ago
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Can I request Vin Jin boyfriend headcanons and some fluff? (You don't have to force yourself)
(This and the other vin jin rq were merged!)
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Honestly the way I see it, it doesn’t matter if you’re a very calm person or outgoing person. No matter what this relationship is gonna end up being considerably chaotic
He ropes you into everything he does. Doesn’t matter if u r a design student or an architecture student or if ur on the opposite side of the school from him, u r practically in his class. Dating him is like signing a contract sealing away ur own life bc he makes it a point to be ALWAYS w u
In class he doesn’t gaf if the teacher has ur seat on the other end of class, he is somehow finding a way to sit next to u against ur will or not. And when the teacher moves u two away from eachother INTENTIONALLY bc of this, he is threatening whoever happened to sit next to u to trade seats w him. He will go as far as to dress up as them to make it look like they’re them to be next to u and he’s so dramatic ab it.... being away from u felt like u were star crossed lovers whom the world was fiercely against
And if UR against this cuz ur tired of getting in trouble in class, or if you reject any of his advances, he’s gonna be really, really, really offended. He will at first sputter and be kinda shy and embarrassed about it, before he goes “fine! Have fun on your own without me, the greatest thing in your fucking life!”
He move seats back and will glare at you periodically every five minutes to pavlov dog you so that every five minutes every day, even when he’s not there, you feel the burning stare of vin jin
If you’re his s/o, he’ll buy you a matching pair of sunglasses so ur the freshest looking couple around Seoul (they’re hideous and thick but he thinks u look fly)
The glasses don’t have nearly as many layers as his does for himself so u can see, and u wonder how he managed to make them just as bulky and if he did it on purpose to sabotage u. Like “did u make my glasses purposefully ugly so no one else will want me?”
U have to dodge a punch after saying anything like that ab his fashion decisions LMAOAO
He’s rlly proud of u two matching. With the glasses and anything in general. He’ll make you wear a jacket matching his, or the same shoes and he will stop people in the hall and be like “wait. Notice anything cool ab us today?? Cooler than normal??”
And when they don’t respond he boasts “that’s right!! Me and my other half r matching. Look at us and weep, losers.” He thinks u two look so good....... if ur enthusiastic ab wearing matching things too he is elated u have to pray that tomorrow he won’t show up w another “if lost return to Vin Jin” “I’m Vin Jin” pair of jackets or anything of the like bc it happens SO OFTEN
And on the topic of sharing when it’s cold he likes to share jackets and blankets w u. Ur desks r moved by eachother by vin jin himself and u two share one blanket over u and shiver bc he just likes it, sharing w u plus he’s slightly warmer. And yes if you guys had indivizual blankets you would be warmer, but u guys have to struggle together he doesn’t care what anyone says (yes even ur protests ur sharing that one blanket wether he has to wrap it around u himself and tear up the one u brought on ur own or what”
He is so blind in love that he cannot tell when u guys suck at stuff. Like if ur in the wrong he doesnt care ur RIGHT and he’s taking that to the grave. He can belittle u and call u out but if someone else says ur in the wrong it’s on sight
Will die protecting ur name even when ur the one who was genuinely wrong
He forces u to make a beat for him to rap to. He loves rapping and wants to enjoy it w u, so ur forcefed YouTube videos of how to beatbox so u can be his bgm and eventually u probably just start to enjoy it to
And u always start a beat and he starts busting out rhymes and it’s SO BAD. It doesn’t matter if ur good at beatboxing if vin Jin is on the track w u it’s gonna sound terrible he brings the quality down immensely but u two just cannot tell
Like after a two session ur like “omg... that was so good. We should go pro?” “Fuck yea we should we’re better than those posers” “we could rlly make it in the industry fr” no u absolutely could not
During the school festival, u sang with him and it was SO bad. Half the crowd is gonna have 2 be hospitalized but u two had FUN up on the stage
Like I said, he has absolute faith in u. All u do is right. If ur driving a car for the first time, he is going to be ur little hype man doesn’t matter if u suck. U hit a curb and he went “YES babe!! Ur killing it cant wait till u hit the road bby” Ur not allowed to touch a car for the next two years now bc he kept cheering u on when u we’re doing CLEARLY wrong things
On a plane u r looking for the bathroom like pensively and u see a handle and look back and r like “is this it???” And vin jin thinking u r all righteous will go “yea babe go for it” and u open it and u depressurizate the cabin immediately
Now both on like 5 no fly lists
He loves to do things with u, like I mentioned earlier, and things he wouldn’t do alone he’ll do w u. Like drawing alone?? Boring. Drawing w Y/N??!!! Who knows what could happen..... so much fun could ensue. Maybe he will draw u cutely. Maybe he will draw u so ugly u will be forced to engage in a fight.
He likes to play just dance w u and compete for the “greats/all star!” Little titles above, and it becomes like a Friday night ritual for u two to turn just dance on and just go at it. But sometimes he’ll get too intense and suddenly he’s actually fighting for the chance to beat u. Will trip u so u lose on purpose
He makes u listen to him sing and rap to u. And u try to leave and he hugs tightly and is like LISTEN IFS FOR U, DONT BE UNGRATEFUL and now u have to listen
He makes u a mixtape of songs he made himself and they are all considerably worse than “remember the times we had”. It’s uploaded on SoundCloud and all the comments r hate and u listen to it a lot bc u know he loves u sm he made u a mixtape ya ur gonna play that but everyone else hates it w a passion
Like the comments r like:
Daniel: well.... it’s definitely a song 😅 I’m glad you love (y/n) so much!
Duke: he’s not making it out the hood 😐
Zach: never let this man in a studio AGAIN
Mary: this should’ve stayed in the CD
(Y/N): love it! 😍
Zoe: kill your producer 💀
Mira: ...
He’s overprotective too
If someone looks at u for more than a second he’ll go “what?? U think she is hot, huh? I’ll kick ur ass fucking perv.... cmon babe let’s go”
Will throw his arm around u and streer u the opposite way of any potentially good looking ppl to keep ur eyes on him
Oh Daniel is coming?? What a coincidence u and vin Jin suddenly have to turn the corner to the other way of ur classroom for some reason
Eli is near?!!! Oh no u just got milk spilt in ur eye!! Oh no now he has to wipe ur eyes and u two have to leave the cafeteria whatever will he do
It’s not that he doesn’t have faith in u, he doesn’t have faith in other men. Like he thinks they r all competition, and doesn’t doubt ur loyalty rather doubts how good he can b for u
WILL beat someone up for u. If someone smokes while ur around suddenly his fists r swinging at them cuz even if u smoke or vape urself no one else can get that stuff in ur lungs but YOU or HIM!!
If ur crossing the street and a car almost hits u, it’s the cars fault and he’s kicking the license plate and cursing it out for almost touching u “stupid fucking piece of metal”
Is the type of boyfriend to call u when he knows ur in an Uber and be like “babe u got ur gun w u right?? Oh don’t forget ur BOMB and ur MACHETE!! Yeah just left the house I killed some ppl nbd haha anyways HRU what’s ur Uber driver like” so the driver of ur car won’t even think ab kidnapping u. He has got ur back even when u do not want it
He doesn’t want u to see his eyes, so he’ll tell you to look away so he can take his glasses off and look at u in full color in all ur glory but he never tells u WHY he’s telling u to look away u think it’s a weird thing of his, or he’s insecure ab his face which is partially true but really he’s taking his glasses off and just looking at u. Adoringly.....
He hates PDA. He loves PDA. Do u see his dilemma
Like he loves PDA but doesn’t want anyone seeing him vulnerable even u.... so he’ll hold ur hand and be like “EWWW WHAT R U DOING GET YR HAND OFF MINE”
If u take the lead THATS best bc he can blame it on u and it’s ur fault he HAS to lock fingers w u cuz u did it to him first and he has an excuse to touch u and v like u started this im just sending u ur own energy back 😤
The type to be just like blind, overwhelmed in love. Always thinks ab u, always wants to be w u, worries ab u a lot and frets over u without showing it.... he hates it and loves it to death. Despises it but wouldn’t give it up for anything in the world
Eats lunch w u in the cafeteria and if u sit w someone else u r the ultimate traitor and he will trash talk u to hide his hurt to Mary the entire lunchtime. Kinda possessive.... wants u to also only think about him
WOULDNT EVER fight u for real. Play fights occur VERY often, like pillow fights, tripping ur foot when u say a joke insulting him, grabbing ur collar but he would sooner die than lay a finger on u
Verbal fights happen a lot and if he ever like LOSES it he may lash out and almost hit u and follow thru. I don’t think he’d be able to catch himself that quickly, and if he ever did he’d regret it for the rest of his life. Literally until the day dies he will take it to his grave
He may not sputter out apologieswill just look at u incredulously and then at his hands because what had he done? What did he just do? To you???????? (Y/n))))?????? His (y/n)??? Light of his life?
Will apologize probably over text or through a note or call, and if u don’t respond he is consumed by regret and tries to find u instantly like runs back to ur place
If u forgive him he feels bad still, because does he deserve it? And he might just isolate himself for a bit bc he can’t face u and if it left a scar he is dead inside. It kills him, literally
I could go on w this but I’ll probably save it for another separate pair of hcs later 😭
If u guys ever break up he will fight for u again and won’t stop till ur back together like flowers in ur locker every day, chocolate give during lunch, etc. He wont ever give up hope that he can win u over again and be w u again. He would keep trying, when he wakes up his first thought is ur name in a cold panic bc he can’t rest easy till ur his again and he will try and show off and poorly serenade u and trash his price and be corny and cheesy to get u back
Will set up a performance w the school to let him rap w a mic during lunch for u and he’s saying bars like “(read in bad rapping voice w inconsistent beat) (y/n), love of my life, uh, without you I’d die, uh. Please won’t you take me back? Yuh, without you ima have a heart attack. (Wha!). (Y/n), love of my life, yeah, without you I’m in strife, yup! Please be mine again, (babe), I can never rest till then.”
If the embarrassment doesn’t make u take him back so he’ll pls stop, and when he stands up on the lunch tables to do a little performance doesn’t do it either, then the odd sincerity of his voice and pain in his look (even tho while rapping he sticks out his lower lip in a weird pout) definitely, hopefully will
U make everything worth it !! Truly the light of his life
I hope these were what u wanted, I just had fun w them and wrote stuff that came off the top of my head when I thought of VJ!! ❤️
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smutbymia · 5 years ago
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Omg can u pls make another nipple sucking fic but w jeno 🥺
You sat on the floor of Jenos dorm room in a fit of soft giggles as the two of you passed your third bottle of soju between each other.
The moonlight bore through the only open window in the little room and you tried your hardest to stifle your laughter since you had already gotten noise complaints from the other dreamies after returning from the barbecue place that you and Jeno had gone to for dinner.
Jeno loved moments like this more than anything in the world. Lately it seemed as though he was happiest around you and it wasn’t until his group members pointed it out that he realized that he may have possibly found what the rest of the boys often joked about and called — the “girl” best friend.
Basically it was a running jokes among idols that at some point during their career they’d stumble across a girl. A perfect girl who seemed to lift your spirits despite the hectic routine of your career. Jaemin had found and then lost his girl best friend all within the span of a couple of months as their friendship progressed into a whirlwind romance that was doomed from the start; another trait of the dreaded “girl” best friend.
The legend stated that the idol and the girl would always teeter between a platonic and romantic relationship, eventually causing conflict between the two and thus dooming the perfect relationship. The only way things seemed to work with these relationships was if the idol was to give up their career and dream to lead a normal life with their partner.
You and Jeno started hanging out quite frequently about 5 months prior to this very night on the bedroom floor. Usually when you hung out it was late at night, after practice or on his days off when you’d take walks by the Han river at 6am to stay discrete and watch the sun rise. Of course these could be seen as dates but the energy between you two wasn’t that heavy. It felt easy — for you.
Jeno was a bit of a nervous wreck. He didn’t think it would be so easy. He really did see you as a friend at first but he messed up. He started seeing you way too often and it was only inevitable that his feelings for you would develop just as quickly. It didn’t fully register until he found himself doing things boyfriends did, like taking you out on frequent dinner dates, or the ease of roping his hands in yours whenever you guys took your morning walks. It all seemed quite normal and natural for him until the rest of his members had grilled him about your situationship after the night of Chenles birthday party.
The two of you had lots to drink (as usual) and were carrying on like your normal selves — which apparently wasn’t very normal at all. Jeno leaned back in his seat with his hand stretched across your bare thigh. You sat next to him with your legs crossed as you sat silently, nursing at the drink in your hand while the boys engaged in an animated conversation about some drama they were binge watching back at the dorm.
Jeno rubbed circles against your leg with his thumb as the rest of his fingers gripped at your thighs. The other members certainly took notice of their friends hand placement but ignored it as they continued speaking. It wasn’t until you leaned over to rest your head against Jeno’s shoulder and he turned his head to plant a quick kiss on your forehead that the conversation at the table went quiet, momentarily.
Needless to say, Jeno was bombarded with questions that night after the boys had come to the conclusion that he was being far too reckless in public, and above all else — he had fallen for you.
Ever since then he struggled to keep from crossing the line drawn between the two of you but that line always became far too blurry when he was drunk. And boy was he drunk tonight.
The boys had warned him against it but he couldn’t resist inviting you over to spend the night. He wanted to hang out longer than you usually got to, and wanted to be able to let loose somewhere where he knew you’d be away from prying eyes.
Now here you were, a drunk and giggly mess on Jenos floor. The other members were hanging out with the two of you before but they had retreated to their rooms for the night to get rest — which apparently you were stopping them from doing with your laughing over the last hour. For you and Jeno the party was only just starting.
“Hide and seek?” Jeno suggested.
You shook your head vigorously before shutting him down, “too drunk and definitely too loud!”
Jeno covered his hand with his mouth as he muffled a laugh at your shaking head and rosy cheeks.
“Truth or dare!” said Jeno after uncovering his mouth and not even attempting to keep his voice down. Your hand flew over his lips as you shushed him, tumbling forward a bit as his arm flew out to your waist as he steadied you infront of him on the floor again. You felt his warm breath tickle your skin as he giggled against your palm.
“Fine but we have to be quiet!” you whispered, your faces inches from his as you carefully removed your hand from over his mouth.
“Okay, y/n... you first. Truth or dare?” asked Jeno. You hesitated before speaking. “Dare... no truth!” you squeaked. This time it was Jenos turn to cover your mouth is he pressed forward into you, sending the two of you slipping onto the floor.
His body was directly on top of yours as you felt the cool wood of the floor against your back. He winced as he waited for the inevitable to happen.
A soft ping filled the room and you and Jeno both turned your heads to peer at the phone that was on the ground next to you. The first ping was followed by 4 more as messages from the NCT Dream group chat spilled in — complaining again.
Jeno texted the group back to apologize, with only one hand because he still needed to muffle your laugh with his other. When he was finished he turned back to you with a stern expression on his drunken face.
“Truth— what are you thinking of right now?” he whispered, still above you.
“You’re not as heavy as I thought you’d be,” you answered without missing a beat.
“Truth or dare?” you asked Jeno.
“Truth,” he responded.
“What’s your biggest secret?” you asked.
“Honestly, you. You’re my biggest secret,” he said. He was right. If fans knew about the two of you spending so much time together he really could be in trouble.
“Truth or dare?” he said, snapping you out of your thoughts.
“Truth again,” you answered.
“How many people have you slept with?” Jeno asked carefully... his eyes narrowed and his lips pouty.
“Jeno!” you gasped quietly. He raised his eyebrows, challenging you and letting you know that he was expecting an honest reply.
“Fine,” you said before confessing, “just one!”
Your cheeks flushed red as you shifted your gaze away from him but you could see a small smile dance on his lips before it disappeared. “Wait, do I know them?” he asked suddenly.
“You only get one question each turn,” you teased, “now truth or dare!”
“Truth again!” he said.
“Uh... okay,” you pondered for a while, “what’s your biggest kink?”
Jeno’s eyes went wide as you watched the heat rush to his face. You were almost certain that you felt him begin to harden before he shifted above you in a position that allowed him to be a bit more discrete about his excitement.
“Ah, y/n... don’t be so shameless,” he scolded. Your mouth dropped open as the shock set in. How dare he make up such and excuse to avoid your question when he had asked you a personal one first.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t answer that! Give me a dare instead” he said as he flashed a smile down at you before finally moving and drawing you up into a sitting position as he poured the final shots of soju for the night.
You cheersed and downed them quickly before you stacked the shot glasses and pushed them aside. The alcohol was flowing through your system and you were beginning to feel a little mischievous so you decided to challenge your friend once more.
You watched as Jeno ran his fingers through his dark hair and looked at you expectantly, thinking he was off the hook. Inside, he was feeling a little overwhelmed. He had just narrowly escaped popping a boner with you right under him and the alcohol was starting to cause words to slip from his mouth carelessly. And you. You looked so beautiful that he could barely keep away from you.
“I dare you to show me,” you said. Jeno could have sworn your lips had began moving in slow motion as his own fell open.
“Wh-what do you mean?” he stammered.
“If you won’t tell me then show me. What’s your biggest kink?” you asked as you moved closer to sit directly in front of him. Your voices had dropped to a whisper lower than any volume you had been in speaking all night.
“Y/n... you dont know what you’re saying,” he warned.
“Truth,” you said randomly.
“What?”Jeno said, confused by your sudden interruption.
“Truth,” you repeated before continuing, “you look really handsome tonight.”
Jeno opened his mouth to respond as a smile spread across his lips but you cut him off before he could get a word out.
“Another truth,” you began, “I’m not sure if it’s just the alcohol but having you on top of me like that made me... feel things.”
“So,” you continued, “I’m just a little curious. I want to know what your biggest kink is. What turns you on?”
Jenos eyes were locked with yours. Even in the dark room, he held your gaze before letting out a deep breath. “So I guess this is it then,” he said under his breath.
You cocked your head to one side, waiting for him to elaborate on that random thought, but he never did. Jeno thought to himself, this was the moment where he’d have to choose wether or not to cross the line. He was nervous. Nervous about what you’d think of him but the more his eyes trailed across your body, the harder it was for him to hold back.
He watched as your chest rose and fell in anticipation for his next words — hoping to learn a dirty little secret about your best friend. He watched as your nipples pressed against the cotton fabric of your white shirt, as he caught sight of the faint outline of your areoles.
“Y/n... I don’t know,” he said as he tore his eyes away from your skin and shut them.
“I-it won’t change anything. I promise,” you said. “I know. I know all about that stupid story about having girls as friends that you all keep spreading around the company!”
Jeno froze as he opened his eyes again. You had reached out and landed your hand on his crossed legs. He reached out, slowly wrapping his hand around your wrist before jerking your arm forward, and pulling you closer to him so your faces nearly touched.
“Promise me. Promise me that you’ll still be my best friend no matter what,” he said as the words spilled quickly from his mouth.
You nodded your head and before you could register what was happening, your best friends lips were pressed firmly against yours.
“Truth,” he said as he broke the kiss. “I’m in love with you.”
You froze in front of him as he drew your bottom lip between his teeth before releasing it and planting a peck on your lips. You roped your hands around his neck as you climbed into his lap, deepening the kiss.
Jenos hands rubbed along your sides, down to your waist and across your butt until he squeezed at your ass through the fabric of your shorts. You could feel him grow hard under you as you let soft moans escape from your lips.
Jeno brushed a finger across your lips.
“Shhh..” he whispered under hooded eyes. You nodded silently as you pressed your lips back together.
“So what is it then? Your kink,” you whispered.
Jeno scratched at the nape of his neck, still feeling a bit embarrassed.
“Come on, you can’t go back on your dares!” you warned.
He sighed before signalling for you to get on the bed as he followed. He ran his thumb across your cheek before lifting at the hem of you shirt and leaning you back onto the bed so you were laying flat against the pillows, topless.
Jeno snuggled into your side before looking up to meet your gaze — not saying anything. You watched as he opened his mouth, allowing his tongue to dart across his lips, wetting them, before planting kisses across your chest and drawing a nipple into his mouth.
“Oh —“ you said as the sensitive bud met the warmth of his tongue while he suckled away. You could hear Jeno’s breathing increase slightly as he grew hard against your leg. This time he pulled his pants down and jerked at his length softly, whining against your skin.
You wrapped an arm around him, supporting his neck as continued to work at your flesh as you ran your fingers through his hair — soothing him as he pumped at his length.
You could feel the pre-crum that had gathered at the head of his penis drip against your leg. Your arousal became too much for you to ignore but you couldn’t interrupt Jeno.
This was it, clearly. He had shown you his vulnerable side and now the pretty boy was fucking himself right infront of your eyes while he nursed at your nipple. You watched as the pretty pink head of his member disappeared between the fist he had formed with his slender and pale fingers.
You couldn’t take it anymore as you allowed your free hand to trail down your body and settle between your legs. You circled at your clit, groaning at the contact that you had been yearning for.
You whimpered as your fingers massaged at your center, causing wetness to pool against your fingers. Jeno suckled harder against your skin as you slipped your fingers inside of yourself. He jerked at himself faster this time, aroused at the sight of you playing with yourself while he was occupied with your soft nipples.
Your orgasm ripped through you as your insides throbbed against your fingers. You bit down on your lip to stop yourself from crying out as Jeno gazed up at you, loving every second of the show you were putting on. He loved the sight of your face as you finally reached your climax. He himself was close but it wasn’t until you slipped your fingers out of yourself and into his mouth in place of your nipple, that he was able to finally cum. His lips circled your fingers as he sucked at the juices that coated them while warm spurts of cum splattered across your thighs.
Jeno collapsed at your side, lifting his fingers up to your lips where you drew them into your mouth to have a taste of him. When you were done licking his fingers clean, he planted a soft kiss on your lips before snuggling back into your chest and licking at your nipples in silence.
“You really like doing that, don’t you baby?” you whispered against his hair as you combed your fingers through.
Jeno hummed against your skin. “It’s my favourite thing in the world,” he whispered as he lulled off to sleep, shortly followed by you.
The next morning, the two of you woke up tangled together beneath the sheets. Jeno was the first one up, and drew circles softly along your back as your eyes began to flutter open.
He paused his movements before nervously speaking. “G-good morning,” he said. “I didn’t mean to sit here and watch you or anything I just didn’t want to leave you alone on your first morning here,” he stammered.
You groaned as you snuggled up closer to him, feeling his body relax at the contact. “How are you feeling,” he asked you.
“Frustrated,” you responded before dropping your voice to a whisper, “someone spent hours sucking on my nipples and I’m almost certain it’s the reason why I’ve been dripping wet all night long!”
Jeno giggled while he planted kisses down your neck as you rubbed softly at your eyes, trying your best to fully wake up.
“I’m sorry,” said Jeno as he flipped you over onto you side to spoon you. He drew your body close against his before slipping his hands back down to your hips and pulling them against his front so you could feel the erection that had grown in his pants.
“Let me make it up to you,” he cooed in your ear as he touched at your body. And he did. He made it up to you all morning long.
thank you to the anon that came up with the truth or dare concept for this mini blurb! ❤️ I haven’t written in so long so forgive me if it takes a while to get into the swing of things again. I feel a bit rusty haha.
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cryptvokeeper · 3 years ago
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Genuine question, can you tell me a bit about the cup people you've been reblogging recently? The art and comics are always cool but I have no idea what this is from lmao. If you're busy, no worries! Hope you're having a great day 💛
ASDFGHJKL yeah sure! its like past midnight tho so this will not be coherent at all;
so thats cuphead and mugman from the indie game cuphead by studio mdhr which is a whole cool story on its own cuz like the studio was literally started by two brothers who one day were like "hey wee should make a game" and then took like 10 years to make it but it was their passion project and it grew and grew and when it finally released it was a huge success and has ports on like every console and has some dlc coming soon and also a Netflix show which we will get to and is honestly just such a feel good game development story which is so rare in the video game industry so yay ^_^
but anyway so the basic gist of the game is that its an extremely difficult bullet hell/run and gun game thats made with completely hand drawn animation in the rubber hose style of early cartoons like the fleischer brothers. all the music is also recorded by a live band which is rad. The plot is that the two brothers, cuphead and mugman, gamble with the devil and lose, so now they have to collect all the soul contracts of the devil's runaway debtors or theyre the ones who'll lose their souls. It came out in 2017 so its a couple years old at this point (almost 5??? holy shit) and you can definitely find plenty of playthroughs online. as I said it was notorious for being very hard and got called like "the dark souls of ___" which, eh, like I haven't played either cuphead or dark souls but I know for sure that their gameplay is NOTHING alike theyre both just really hard.
I used to think the game was really cool but never really got too far into the fandom because it got popular very quickly and it came with a fast and inevitable backlash of getting called cringe. but now im a tax paying adult woman who doesnt CARE about cringe and I do what I want and have been having a great time! The animated series came out on Netflix last month and I finally watched it and fell headfirst back into being into cuphead cuz its really good. It is a little different, it doesnt follow the game but its a fun time in its own right. I was struggling earlier to describe it cuz I wanted to say its low stakes but that isnt right, cuz its still get the premise of selling your immortal soul to the actual devil its just like...low impact? Like its not one of those cartoons like Steven universe or she ra or something with a heavy epic story with deep emotional beats its just like goofy looney tunes fun stuff yknow? with some plot thrown in for flair but never gets too serious which is a breath of fresh air honestly, I needed something light. the most you get is one dream sequence moment which is a little more serious but not too much, and just cuz its not super serious and deep doesnt mean its low quality in the slightest the animation is GORGEOUS it looks really great and reminds me of hand drawn animation even though its not Done that way like the game. really smooth, I like it alot.
im sorry this doesnt tell you alot abt like the characters themselves but honestly thats cuz there isnt that much to them? like theres plenty of head canon and aus and stuff you can extrapolate from the text (any and all of which I can absolutely talk abt if u want me to but this is already very long and I dont want to bore/overwhelm you) but the game itself is very light on story. the characters never actually talk and the show has some more characterization but its pretty simple so far especially cuz its only half of the firsts season (12 eps) and you probably got the gist if you've seen what ive reblogged; cupheads the dumb goofy one, mugman is also dumb but more of a straight man to balance his brothers impulsivenesss, that sort of thing. You may have also seen king dice, the casino owner working for the devil, the devil himself, and Ms chalice/legendary chalice, a character who in the games is a ghost that gives you new powers and is gonna be a playable character inn the DLC, and in the show, well, they haven't shown too much of her but she's implied to have got some secrets goin on.
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leossmoonn · 3 years ago
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I’m begging be my wingwoman 🔮 (male marauder pls)
My name is Laila. I use the pronouns she/her 💜. My favorite color is purple (like my room is purple and everything) and I’m unlabelled cause I do what I want 🙄. I ramble A LOT. I love talking about things I’m passionate about like fictional universe, movies (I’m obsessed with movies) and music, yes I can listen to the same song 15 times a day. I love r&b, bedroom pop, rock, grunge so anything really. When I’m not screaming madly about racist, homophobic, Islam phobic and sexist ppl or fictional universes, I talk about astrology and personality tests. I just love trying to figure out ppl and understand them. So, I’m really intuitive. Maybe it’s because I feel like no one understands me but idc cause I’m in denial about my depression all the time so I’m still the funny, talkative (I can still be calm and cool, I’m an introvert after all), super supportive friend in my friend grp (which is only two ppl btw). As I said I’m obsessed with movies and music which results in me being dramatic. Like I would be the type to propose that we dance in the rain, watch the stars or open the windows of the car and scream at the top of our lungs on the bridge of some Lorde song or “Just like heaven” by The cure. Btw I’m an hufflepuff, I’m biracial (half African, half white french Canadian), I’m 5’8 and an infp. My big three is libra sun, Scorpio moon and Capricorn rising. Sorry if I overwhelmed you, sometimes my mind just gets so full ;) thank u and have a wonderful day/night <3
ahh this isnt too much dont worry! it gave me a lot to work with :)
marauders ship - sirius black
so you annoyed sirius at first bc you were trying to figure him out. you asked him lots of questions and tried to get under his skin bc you knew he was more than just the gryffindor playboy who occasionally plays pranks. (spoiler alert: you were right lol). you also had a slight crush on him, which caused you to want to talk to him a lot. and honestly, he liked you too, he just hated that you were trying to figure him out. he wanted to remain mysterious, but once you two became a couple, he knew that wouldn’t happen. you were the first one to ask him out. it was kind of out of a dare from your friends and his friends bc they teased you two a lot, and his friends knew youd kill him w your questions. so you asked him out casually and he agreed. he ended up setting up the date and it actually turned out a lot more romantic than you thought lol. he ended up setting up a little picnic under the stars by the black lake. he made your favorite dishes and you were very very impressed. you two ended up learning a lot about each other and sirius fell haaaarrrdd that night. he learned what your favorite songs were, your dream job, what zodiac signs you hate, your family history and personal life. he was a big talker himself, but that night he just let you take control of the convo bc he loves your voice. he thinks its so cute when youre excited abt the topic too. you were ranking your favorite movies from worse to best, and whenever you got to the best ones, your eyes would light up and you would squeal and your whole body would shake in excitement and it just made sirius smile so much. like by the end of the night, his cheeks were numb. you two ended up turning on music, your fav ofc and you introduced him to a lot of r&b and bedroom pop and he is a proud supporter of destiny’s child and wallows. you two laid on the blanket and looked at the stars. you started talking again abt astrology and stuff and sirius even took a turn in talking abt astrology and it really surprised u and def made you 10000x more attracted to him hehe. the night ended w him walking you back to your house and a sweet goodnight kiss and him asking you to be his girlfriend. awe! you two are the hottest and loudest couple ever lol. you two often play pranks on each other, sirius teaches you eletric guitar to your fav rock songs, you end up making him take a personality test hehe. he wasnt very political before but you turned him into a polite - most of the time - politician. you two know all the facts and always win the arguments. (or end up hexing ppl lol). you two are al all-around supportive, loyal, fun, and loving couple. and though your personalities may clash (you blame it on the zodiac signs hehe), you two are soulmates and wouldn’t change a thing abt each other <3
hope you like this :)
join my celebration! - 1 day left
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babysizedfics · 4 years ago
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I need to know about doctor mama lo taking care of a sick baby Virgil if you would like pretty please. I dont wanna ask on the in character blog cuz I feel like it would be weird to ask for details and lo seems kinda busy anyway lol.
hey tumblebee!! yeah yeah lets do this, Im gonna write it so that ppl who dont follow the other blog can understand too
WARNING IF U HAVENT ALREADY BLOCKED THE TAGS ILLNESS TW AND VOMIT TW THEY ARE VERY PREVALENT IN THIS
also this is a VERY long headcanon!!
so last night vee got ill, he had been regressed in the afternoon with patton and he was acting much more fussy than usual - not being entertained by his cartoons, not having the energy to play with his rattle, pretty much constantly whining and pouting and he gets very wriggly when he's fussy
patton assumed it was because vee had been upset earlier that day. at one point vee started gripping his stomach, and patton assumed its because he was hungry and could smell the food roman was cooking
but when dinner came around no matter how hard patton tried he couldnt get vee to eat a morsel - he kept turning his head away from the food and whining. at one point patton and logan both managed to convince him to eat a spoonful but his face crumpled with a wince and it looked almost painful for him to swallow it. it was at this point logan noticed he had a faint sheen of sweat on his forehead
things fell into place quickly after that - logan checked his temperature and it was indeed slightly higher than was healthy, they noticed vee's hands were trembling and he was constantly on the verge of tears :(
while patton cleared away dinner and excused roman who wanted to go and craft in his room, logan took vee to his bedroom and tried to check for more symptoms, since vee was non verbal and unresponsive totheir questions. he tested his tummy by pushing it a little to see if the pain got worse when he released it (this is a test for appendicitis) but there was no reaction thankfully except vee being upset by logan not cuddling him. he checked his throat for any redness or infection, nothing.
vee's crying became more pronounced and eventually he was in constant tears, occassionally pleading 'mama mama' through sniffles and hiccups and whines of pain :(( Patton brought him a baby bottle of cooled tea made with fresh mint leaves since that is supposed to help stomach pains. though he left the room again since logan thought it was best not to crowd virgil. Vee's crying had dissipated but he was strangely silent and seemed almost loopy now. he only drank a little of the tea before he pushed it away with a gag.
logan immediately took him to the bathroom knowing what was coming, and sure enough vee threw up into the toilet, crying between gags. logan dutifully managed to keep vee in his lap the whole time and held his hair and rubbed his back, telling him he was such a good boy the whole time
Thankfully it didnt last long as there wasnt much in vees stomach to be emptied. he was shivering and sweating and flushed and had lost all energy. he wasnt even crying anymore, just whimpering under his breath. with a bit of a struggle logan managed to show him how to rinse his mouth out with mouthwash - though he had to hold vee over the sink and pat his back to make sure he didnt swallow it
during all of this patton wasnt able to help because of his heightened empathy, if he sees someone throwing up the likeihood is he will too and that wiuldnt be very helpful! so instead he drives to the store to pick up some medicine and ice pops - and comes back with half the store including some actual baby medicine smh - ((im actually begging u to read that linked post i think its so funny))
it was originallly meant to be logans night to put roman to bed but understandably patton took on that task instead. after roman was drifting off patton pokes his head into vee's room. he had hoped to find lo and vee asleep but they werent. they were lying in the dark with an in the night garden audio story playing on a portable speaker and with vees salt lamp and star night light lighting up the room in a soft glow.
logan offered a strained little smile and nod to patton as he stroked vee's hair and cuddled him close. vee was completely out of it honestly. his body was wholly lax against his mama, his lips were in a permanent pout and his eyes were puffy and wet. he barely even acknowledged his papa coming in, his teary eyes just settled on him for a moment then dropped back to the bedsheets without a reaction. he kept lifting his thumb up to suck on it but logan kept capturing it and apologising as he brought it away. Vee shouldnt suck on his thumb and logan doesnt want to give him a paci while he's ill. understandably, baby vee was completely miserable.
patton asks if logan thinks vee could handle a popsicle or plain crackers at the moment but logan disagrees. he doesnt expect either of them to get much sleep so he will make sure vee eats something in a few hours. with a gentle kiss on vee's forehead patton goes off to bed, confident that logan will be able to look after vee and will come get him if theres any issues
logan and vee really dont sleep much at all. Vee drifts off for a few minutes at a time then gasps awake from vivid fever dreams. logan keeps ice cubes in a bowl by the bed for vee to suck on if he needs to cool down and wraps a couple in a flannel to press to vee's head when his fever rises in the middle of the night.
around 3am logan jolts awake and realises he had drifted off. and vee isnt anywhere in the room. he panics momentarily, bolting up from the bed and dashing to the closet to see if virgil is in there - which he tends to do when he is overwhelmed - but then he hears sniffling from the bathroom.
he finds vee, no longer regressed, curled up against the side of the bathtub with his bangs clinging to his sweaty head. vee is the palest person logan knows but he looks positively grey at the moment
'can i help in any way?' he asks, aware that he doesnt need to baby talk at the moment but still eager to look after this bundle of miserableness
virgil just groans under his breath and clutches his knees to his chest. 'i.. i didnt know what to do with the..' he gestures vaguely to something on the floor
logan notices virgil, being not regressed anymore, had obviously wrestled off the diaper he had been changed into the night before and not known how to dispose of it
'its ok, ive got it' logan wraps it up in a bag and puts it in the trash can they have in the room for just this purpose
'sorry.. m stupid' virgil croaks
'You're not stupid.' logan says firmly as he washes his hands 'You're ill and probably delirious from the fever. it's alright virgil'
theres quiet for a bit longer, virge's head pressed against the porcelain edge of the bathtub likely in an attempt to cool his fever. logan stays there with him for a while just waiting. then suddenly virgil starts sobbing and buries his face in his hands.
'sweetheart, tell me whats wrong please' logan hurries to kneel beside him, lifting his hands away from his face. that wouldnt help the fever
'i dont feel well' virgil cries pathetically, tears rolling down his face.
logans heart breaks 'no, you dont. i'm sorry little one, i know its not nice'
at the nickname virgils thumb raises to his lips again, which logan hurriedly intercepts. 'i'll make you a deal, okay? you're allowed to use a pacifier, but you have to use the same one everyday until you are better. we will need to sterilise it every night too.'
vee sniffles and nods, then chokes 'm not a baby right now though'
'that doesnt matter. you dont need to be regressed to want one of your pacis, vee'
vee is unresponsive and starts scratching at his pyjama pants. logan gets a feeling he isnt saying something. then he notices virgil's pout is much more infantile than his adult ones. 'are you feeling little, baby?'
with a harsh shake of his head vee starts crying again. he whispers 'dont wanna be a b...' then cuts himself off and whimpers
logan cards his fingers through virgils damp bangs. he knows what virgils mind has jumped to. 'were you going to say you dont want to be a baby?' he lifts virgils chin up to look at him 'or that you dont want to be a burden?'
virgils pale lip wobbles 'same fing'
'no sweetheart, no no no,' logan sits on the tiles beside vee and pulls him into his lap. virgil goes willingly. logan rocks his baby as he says 'youre always always allowed to be a baby and its never ever going to upset your family. even if you're an adorable wonderful brave baby boy alllll of the time' he scribbles his finger on virgils rosy cheek and delights at the tiny smile it earns him. 'but especially when you're feeling yucky. you feel a bit yucky today dont you, little one?'
vee nods with a pout
'but yknow whats not yucky? softies and pacis and diapers and lots and lots of cuddles with mama' he holds virgil tighter to prove his point. vee sighs and drops his head to nuzzle against his mama's neck. logan feels he still has a slight fever. 'i know what might help you feel less yucky. does my sweet baby want a sweet ice pop?'
thankfully vee nods against his shoulder and grips tight onto his pyjama shirt, preparing for when logan lifts him up
he first makes sure to change vee into another diaper and even decides that he should wear one of mama's t-shirts as a light dress so he doesnt get as overheated by his pyjamas. at this point vee actually giggles for the first time pretty much all day as he feels the tshirt swish lazily around his legs. logan makes a mental note to observe whether little vee might want to try wearing dresses if the feeling sparks this much joy (at this point logan is unaware that vee has secretly been trying skirts and dresses in his room for months, and roman found out a few weeks ago, but vee isnt ready to tell the cgs yet)
by the time vee is in his diaper and mamas tshirt dress and has a paci and jiji clutched to his chest he is a lot calmer and happier. he's still very ill and exhausted and teary, but theres a tiny smile on his face instead of a pout. in the kitchen he picks a strawberry ice pop and it goes down well, logan convinces him to have a cracker too though vee is in such a young headspace by then that he is just sucking on it, which logan supposes is fine too
by the (real) morning vee is still regressed and has managed to have a couple hours undisturbed sleep. its not much but its better than nothing. logan didnt fare much better. by then vee misses his papa and asks for him and logan hands the responsibility over to papa patton, trustinf the other caregiver enough to catch up on a quick power nap himself
but yes, the main thing is vee thought being ill was a burden enough that he shouldnt be regressed too, but logan makes him see that its okay. vee is regressed pretty much the whole time he is ill over the next few days because its stressful and painful and its a lot easier to feel comforted when ur a baby
yeah! gosh that was long, theres probably a billion spelling mistakes! feel free to ask follow up Qs if i missed anything u wanted to know abt this event
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Note
Hi tree! I have some questions and it's ok if you don't know that answers to them but as long as you try, it's cool! So, here we go!
1. Why do yo go as tree as your name? Is there, like, a meaning or do you just like trees? Just wondering! :)
2. What are some things you shouldn't say to someone part of the lgbtq community? I have a brother and I've said some mean things to him that I don't want to repeat. This is all very confusing, overwhelming, and scary to me but that's no excuse and I really want to learn and change. I'm also going to middle school after summer and I know there will be a lot of diverse people and I don't want to hurt anyone at all.
3. Do you have any questioning tips? As in, when u were questioning, was there anything that you did or thought about that helped? When I ask my bro, he just says I don't need to figure it out just yet but it's been nagging at me for a while.
So, those are my questions! Again, it's ok if you don't know that answer but please answer the ones you can. I feel like the last question was a bit too personal so if ur not comfortable answering that, it's cool. Thanks a million tree!!!!
hello! first of all, youre so sweet!! 🥺 this is such a thoughtful ask! i cant promise my answer will be what you're looking for, but i'll try my best!
1. a lot of reasons that i've kind of collected over time! it started bc one of my friends said i was a tree-kisser and i was like "i am one of them" and they started referring to me as treeman, a different friend and i were joking about being plants bc we're ace and i told them about the treeman name so they called me tree, and a different friend said us indians look good in green bc we're trees, and also i just. like trees. i think they're funky
2. i dont have any definitive answers to that, but i'd just say to be mindful of yourself. obviously dont do anything that would be assuming or generalizing things, even in a joking way (like people say im a sexless creature bc im ace, which is okay from friends and other ace people ig, but not from people who dont know me and make assumptions? its a bit hard to explain). my best advice is to just keep an open mind and try to have these hard conversations with someone who is comfortable hacking out such things with you.
different people can take offense to different things, but honestly, just tell people straight up that you're still learning and dont mean any harm, and that they should tell you if you say something wrong, and over time you'll understand on your own. its a very intuitive thing, i would say.
3. i kind of agree with your brother, actually, but hear me out. the best thing i ever did for myself was to give myself time. i was so fixated on trying to put myself in a box and researching like i was getting a phd in gay and trying on and discarding labels faster than i could even say them and it affected my mental health a lot.
you're young. you have time. you dont need to worry now. if you find a label that fits at your leisure and you think it matches who you are? great! amazing! if you slowly try on labels and end up not finding one? great! amazing! just let yourself breathe and dont fuss about it.
finding out your gender or your sexuality or your romantic orientation is an inherently inward thing, so it stands that it may change with you. dont run through your journey; just take a little stroll. sit on a bench and observe. learn.
you have time. dont rush it.
for me personally, i dont know either. gender = ???, and sexuality = ???, and romantic orientation = ???. and im fine with that. it may not work for everyone, but it does for me, and i use a couple different labels for people when i feel like i have to put a word on it. all i know is, i like everyone, i dont have a particular want for sex but im cool with it, and im definitely not female, and i like being male.
thats all, and thats enough.
thank you, i hope this helped! have a great day!
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ain-t-bovvered · 5 years ago
Text
15X01
bunch of tired and caffeinated Europeans ( plus a sleepy American) scream together, and then die and try to get on with their day ( lol AS IF)
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Hello and welcome:
@purpleskiesandcherrypies​  (Nat)
@dean-winchesters-bacon​  (Kat)  
@waywardbaby​  (Zee)
@ain-t-bovvered  (Giulia)
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Giulia: I HATE THIS
Giulia: BTW
Giulia: IF ANYONE WAS CURIOUS
Kat: Don’t worry you’ll hate it more later
Giulia: GREAT
Zee: Quit flapping your gums bitches
Nat : shall I count?
Giulia: Go when u post 🖕🏻
Nat : lol
Zee: Nice
Nat : i just go with GO
Giulia: Weak
Nat : ok
Nat : listen
Nat : 3
Nat : 2
Nat : 1
Nat : GO
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Giulia: GREAT MUSIC
AH Y’ALL DON’T LISTEN TO THE LYRICS OF THIS SONG
Zee: Where’s carry on ?
♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ Think of seasons that must end ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ 
Nat : I DON'T REMEMBER HALF OF WHAT THEY SHOW NOW.  It's erased from my memory
Giulia: look at my stupid baby
♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ They will rise and fall again ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ 
Giulia: Oh look the dumb coffin
Nat : "I do believe in us."
Zee: John
♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ Everything must have an end ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬
Giulia: I DIDN T NEED JOHN AGAIN
♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ Take it calmly and serene ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬
BITCH HOW
Giulia: bye mary.Good riddance
♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ It's the famous final scene ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬
Zee: Maybe I should watch on mute
Kat: Shut up chuck
♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ It's been coming on so long You were just the last to know ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬
Zee: The fuck is this song ?
It's been a long time since you've smiled
Giulia: IDK I HATE IT
♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ Seems like oh so long ago Now the stage has all been set ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬
Giulia: bb Sob ....Them hair on fleek tho
Nat : What are the odds
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Zee: BAMF Cas
Giulia: Idk seems so desperate
Kat: Always
Nat : So much grunting. So sexy
Giulia: AWE
♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ Now the lines have all been read And you knew them all by heart ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬
Kat: SAM
Kat: DEAN
Zee: He took jack
♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ Here it comes the hardest part Try the handle of the road ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬
Kat: over the shoulder like a sack of potatoes
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ok I now it’s a serious moment but Dean skipping with his birb bowlegs is making me cackle so much i cannot
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LOOK AT HIM ....*SNORTS*
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oh look another meme
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Giulia: Sam just casually shoving a ghost out of the way
♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ As the light fades from the screen From the famous final scene ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬
Zee: Ok
Zee: I hate it
Giulia: OH THAT TITLE CARD
Nat : Ah great title card
ok but ....* slows down frames and saves some of them* WHAT’S THIS
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Whatever let’s just go back to more pressing matters
Lol that is so not Misha carrying Jack tho
Giulia: Misha’s fingers be that thick
Zee: Focus
Giulia: Lol dean reaching for that booze, I mean SAME.
Nat : AW CAS
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Giulia: Awe SAM
Zee: Sam panting
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D: He didn’t deserve this
Kat: Aw
S: Cass, is he here? C- C-Can you... Can you...?
Giulia: SAM 
Nat : "I don't think so"
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Nat : I cry
Giulia: I CRY
Giulia: Sam’s pain is physical
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Giulia: I cannot
I mean,...they do look like zombies. 
D: Chuck... He said, "Welcome to the End”.  What... What does that mean?
Zee: Welcome to the end
D: Cass? Come on, man! Ideas!
Team free Stress
Giulia: It means final season
D: Can you smite our way out of here?
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Zee: Cas squint
C: No. You saw them. I would be overwhelmed, Dean.
Well I honestly thought Dean actually asked if Cas could fly them off there....which...well don’t think it can happen if the state of his wings are the same, BUT STILL, we don’t actually know becasue PLOTHOLES. But whatever man, I still love my show.
D: Great. So we go outside, we get ripped apart. We stay in here, w- what, starve to death?!
C: I wouldn’t starve
Nat : WELL GOOD FOR YOU
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Giulia: WeLl gOoD fOr yOu
Kat: Love the sass
D: Son of a bitch
the fandom:  * CHEERS*
Giulia: Sure he knew
D: He's always so squirrelly, you know, with the...with the... the robe and the beard and...the smile that's, like, half-nice, half "I'm gonna rip your throat out. "
Giulia: Oh that true
Nat : Aw Dean
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Giulia: AHAHAHA
Giulia: DEAN’s SALTY AF
Nat : Me
Zee: Those fingers tho
Giulia: Why don t they let cas do that, come on
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Nat : So much grunting and panting in the first couple of minutes
Nat : I love it
Giulia: Gotta isolate just those
Nat: Cas doesn't want to help
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Giulia: Nice
Nat : AH well
Zee: Hello
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Giulia: …
Giulia: WELL HELLO GOOD MORNING TO ME
Nat : Now he did
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a wild Jack appears
Nat : Ah
Zee: What?
Nat : what
Kat: Hahahahahaha
Giulia: JESUS CHRIST
Nat : IN THE HELL
Giulia: the fuck
Kat: Demon!Jack
Giulia: OH COME ON
Nat : AW DEMON JACK
d!Jack: HELLO
S: Jack! you are alive
oh Sam...baby
Zee: Shut up
d!Jack: I- I'd do the whole eyes thing, but, uh, yeah, no eyes.
Nat : WITH SASS
Team free confused
Zee: Blending
Kat: Weekend at Bernie’s haha
Giulia: SO GOOD THO
Nat : Nice glasses
C: Get out of him
Zee: What he said
d!Jack : Okay? Uh, where do I start? Like at the first day of school. Uh, hi.Uh, my name is Belphegor. And, I'm, uh, here from...
Angry Cass approaching
C: i said get out of him. I’m not gonna ask again
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me: 
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D: Cass. Let him speak.
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C: He's an abomination!
Giulia: AWE CAS
Nat : Cas is having none of it
B: You're an abomination with that stupid, dumb trench coat.
Kat: You’re an abomination with that trenchcoat 🤣
Zee: I love Cas
Giulia: but also love Alex
Giulia: STUPID DUMB TRENCHCOAT
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Zee: Listen to your husband Cas
C: He is defiling Jack's corpse!
D: But if he can help... [angrily] Jack's gone, alright?
Giulia: STOP IT DEAN
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Giulia: sob
S: So we are...
B: The Winchesters
Nat : "I read the papers" lol
B: Anyway, I'm guessing this whole, uh, Hellmouth thing is kind of, uh, you?
i MEAN HE’S NOT WRONG
C: No. It was God.
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B: Okay, okay. Look. I-I'm not some crossroad demon. I'm not even one of those black-eyed goons
Giulia: Who the fuck are u
Nat : Virgin puppies  EW
Nat : TwinSiEs
Nat : snorts
Giulia: We are NOT twinsies
Cas is ready to slap a bitch
Giulia: So strange seeing jack like that tho
Nat : But so good
Zee: He be good
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B: Ohh. Little spell. You know, nothing major. Just need some graveyard dirt... and some, uh, angel blood.
Giulia: Yeah, of course, let s use cas again
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*Snort* .... he’s so offeded
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WHAT A MOOD
Nat : what
Giulia: What he do
Nat : WHAT
Giulia: Really
Nat : who is that
Nat: HOW
Giulia: Oh come on
Giulia: I DONT TRUST THIS
Nat : ME NEITHER HIGH FIVE
Giulia: TOO EASY
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B: Hey it worked! High five
Giulia: WHAT
Nat : I'LL PUNCH YOU
Well I wouldn’t want to be the graveyard guys in the morning
Nat : Ah that music
Zee: Future deaths
Nat : Ah bloody mary
Giulia: “oH mY gOd” Who still does that anyway
Nat : Bloody Mary messes with cellphones now
Giulia: A bitch gotta get on with the future
Giulia: Those nails be nasty
Nat : Mhh...  She's more evil than before I would guess
B: I mean, come on. I look good.
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Giulia: That cas squint
Giulia: Yeah Cas does not like
Nat : Cas is suspicious
Nat : They act like they're surprised about 2-3billion souls in hell
Kat: I was surprised the number was that low
B: Imagine a salt circle a mile wide No ghosts get in, no ghosts get out.
S: Yeah. Great. Okay.
C: NO. That town... Harlan, Kansas...is less than a mile from the cemetery.
D: Then we get everybody out.
C: How?
D: WE LIE
Giulia: what else is nee
Giulia: Nee
Giulia: New
Nat : lol
Zee: New
Nat : Nee
Giulia: Great Another typo that will hunt us all
Giulia: Why this time the blood looks fake af
Nat : That my car
Zee: Woman in white
S: Dean, this could be our woman in white.
D: Dude. We sent her to Hell years ago.
S:Yeah, but she could be back.
Nat : Dean just realized
D: Well, if she's back, then they're all back. Every last one that we ever killed.
Giulia: I also just realized that we are seeing them again. My babies. I hugged those bitches S.  O. B
Nat : Aw bb
Kat: Lucky you
Zee: Giuls bb. Shut the fuck up please
I must say tho....that must have felt really depressing for them...I mean..all their work just ...puff....
Giulia: Fuck clows
Nat : Ah no
Giulia: Fuck them
Nat : Stupid clowns
Giulia: Fuck off
Giulia: Drive the fucking car into the door
Nat : Wouldn't get through.
Kat: No keys
Nat : Not enough space to fully accelerate
Zee: So much science
Giulia: Ugh true
Zee: Wtf is sam’s hair?
D: We can handle the evac, so why don't you grab Crowley Jr. here whatever he needs for his spell?
C: NO
D: 
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Well he didn’t expect that 
C: Dean, I can't. I-I...I can't even look at him.
Giulia: AWE CAS
Nat : Aw Cas
Giulia: AWE AWEEEEEE
Giulia: IM HURT.IM BADLY HURT
C: Um... I...
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Awe I think even Dean expected that reaction from Cas. I’m so hurt y’all....so hurt.
WHAT ARE THOSE ROLLING EYES DEAN JFC
Giulia: that sheriff a bit out of it
Kat: Small town. Probably doesn’t have to do much
Nat : Jack probably has his own agenda. "Jack"
Giulia: Yeah
Belphy seeing the gun with that ridiculous nerd name: um....what’s that?
D: Don’t worry about it
B: ok cool
B: So, people are, like, crazy good-looking now, eh?
D: what
B: I mean, the last time I was on Earth, I mean, I was human. Ah, it was a while ago. I mean, but, you know, we were all worshipping308 this giant rock that looked like a huge penis, and...
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Giulia: Wait what
Kat: Huge penis rock
Giulia: thank you
B: Anyway, folks back then, they were, uh, ugly. You know? Had a lot of humps. I mean, a lot.
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B:  Look at 'em now.
D: 
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B:I mean, look at you . I mean, you're, uh, you know, gorgeous
Giulia: HE IS
ALL OF US : WE KNOW
Nat : GET THE FUCK IN LINE FAKE JACK
Kat: BEHIND ME
B: So, uh...who was... he, anyway? 
D: He was our kid. Kinda.
Zee: Our kid
Giulia: OMG NO SOB
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Nat: I cry
Zee: Shut up dean
Kat: OUR KID
Giulia: IM SO HURT
D: Alright. So, what do you need for this spell?
B: you know, nothing much. Big bag of salt.
D: Easy
B: And a... And a human heart.
Giulia: a human heart
Nat : what else ,easy
Kat: OF COURSE
Giulia: CAS LOOKS YUMMY YUUUUUMMY
Kat: OF COURSE
Giulia: LOOK AT HIM
Nat : Giuls people are dying
Giulia: HEWWO
Zee: And thicc
Nat : "insert Kim K gif"
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Giulia: WELL AT LEAST THEY HAVE A NICE THING TO LOOK AT
Giulia: Nice thic, tan things
Giulia: With great hair
Giulia: Nice eyes
Giulia: I should focus
Nat : Cas saw?
Zee: Yeah
Giulia: So thic
Kat: Aw poor dead girls
Nat : GIULS FOCUS
Giulia: That shirt is crying for mercy
Giulia: Yeah yeah Sorry
Giulia: *keeps looking at those pecs*
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Giulia: NO SAM WITH KIDS IM WEAK
Zee: Sam should stop exhaling like that
Nat : NO
Kat: Jared is 4 times the size of that kid
Giulia: STOP HURTING HIM
Kat: Yeah
Zee: Yeah bitch
Giulia: YAS CAS
Kat: I KNOW
Nat : Did Sam treat his bullet wound tho
Giulia: Probably just patched up
Giulia: angel with a shotgun
I love when Cas take care of Sam...so soft.
Nat : that's not a big bag of salt, Dean
D: Rowena, we need your help, so move your ass. What? No, I'm not...Move your exquisite ass, please.
Zee: Exquisite ass
Kat: EXQUISITE ASS PLEASE
Giulia: MOVE YOUR EXQUISITE ASS
D: Here’s your salt
US: Thanks we have plenty 
B: im a fan
Giulia: NO
Zee: Oh no bitch
Zee: NO
B: Yeah, I-I didn't want to say it in front of the other guys,but when you were in Hell, with Alastair, I, uh... I got a chance to watch you work. And, I mean, the things you did to those people, I mean, it wasn't torture. 
Kat: FUCKING ASSHOLE DEMON
Nat : OH NO
Giulia: BAD CHOICE OF WORDS
Giulia: FUCK
Nat : IT WAS ART
Kat: iT waS ArT
Giulia: Is it bad that I wanna watch that tho
Zee: WATCH WHAT?
Nat : YES
Giulia: DEAN’S “ART”
Zee: Wtf is wrong with you ?
B: And then every door in Hell just sprang open all at once.
D: Wait. Every door? Even the Cage?
Nat : Even the cage
Nat : OH NO
D: And Michael?
B: Well, last I heard, he was just sittin' there. Yeah, but if he got out, I mean... Ugh.
Giulia: Lol ADAM
B: I mean...he wouldn't hold a grudge, right?
Giulia: *SNORTS* SURE
Nat : Ah that looks nasty
Kat: YALL WATCH CAREFULLY COMING UP
Zee: Can I love Cas in this ep?
Giulia: Oh cas can mend shirt too
Nat : SNORTS
Nat : WHAT DO YOU MEAN
Nat : Ah
Giulia: i don t like what is going on
Kat: JUST WATCH
Zee: Fuck
Nat : I HATE THIS KAT
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Giulia: WHAT
Nat : AH NO
Giulia: NO
Nat : SHIT WHAT
Kat: I TOLD YOU
Giulia: WHAT WAS THAT
Nat : WHAT IS GOING ON
Nat : EVIL SAM IS IN THAT WOUND
But let us take a blurred , closer, look tho: 
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*GASPS*
THAT’S THIC BEARD DEAN
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YUM
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those are definitely black eyes. 
WHAT IS GOING OOOOOOOOOOON
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Giulia: Oh I remember that clock, leave a comment if you do too.
Nat : btw All the ghosts don't look very scary
Kat: All these ghosts look old af
Zee: Them bow legs
Giulia: Look at that strut
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Kat: Fresh would be better lol
B: cOOL
Giulia: Zee’s that u
Casually punching a hole into someone chest to rip a heart out
Giulia: Got a heart
Nat : WHAT
Kat: Damn fake Jack
Zee: Get away kid
Nat : YOU DON'T SAY
Nat : GOOD FOR YOU
Giulia: Oh the lake ghost
Giulia: Oh ya RUN BB RUN
Kat: That kid is too calm
Zee: It’s not ok
Giulia: it s noooot
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Nat : No, he didn't
Nat : Sam did
Zee: You shot me
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Giulia: SNORTSP
Kat: You shot me 🤣🤣
Kat: Bad ghost bad
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Giulia: Well that was scary
Nat : Stop hurting Sam
Zee: STOP HURTING SAM
Giulia: OH LOOK I LOVE CAS WITH THE SHOTGUN
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Zee: WE BEEN KNEW
Nat : OF COURSE YOU DO
Giulia: AWE HE S SAVING SAM
Nat : The ghosts all look weird af
Giulia: True
Kat: They are 15 years older okay
Giulia: Must be the daylight
Zee: I don’t trust jack
Giulia: well is not jack
Giulia: AWE
Nat : AH HE IS FAST HE HAS LONG LEGS
Giulia: I’m worried about Misha's hip
Zee: Shut up
Giulia: Shut up
Kat: AAAAAHHHHH SHUT UP
Giulia: Good gif to use
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Nat : he said it like Stepford Sam
Kat: MMHHMM
Giulia: Right?
Giulia: Listen to that PUR
Kat: SO GOOD
Giulia: the angel thing
Nat : So 4 people fit in the back
Nat : lol
Giulia: GOOD TO KNOW
Nat : Ah, not sexual
Zee: Or two horizontal ones
Kat: Well one is a small child
Giulia: Me and Nat are small child size
Nat : Yes
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D:  You okay?
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C: Yes, but...
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Giulia: UGH
Nat : lol
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B: Wow! Awkward WANNA TALK ABOUT IT
Zee: Is that a no?
Nat : LISTEN TO HIM DEAN
Zee: That’s a no
Kat: Ooohhh they so pissed
Giulia: SO PISSED
Giulia: SO TENSE
Nat : SO HOT
Giulia: THEY SHOULD RELAX
Giulia: I JUST HAPPEN TO KNOW HOW
Giulia: what
D: Right now we get you fixed up.
S: what
Nat : I'M FINE
Giulia: Yeah open that shirt
Nat : Do you hear that
Nat : FIIIIIINNNEEEEEEE
D: We've been going nonstop. Let me see it.
D: There's no exit wound.
Giulia: DON T TALK LIKE THAT
Nat : Yeah, sure Jan
D: Hey, do you remember when we were little? What I would do to distract you whenever I'd rip off a Band-Aid or something like that?
S: Yeah. You'd tell some stupid joke.
Kat: Omg such a soft moment
Nat : Aw
Nat : Don't come up with old stories now. I'll cry
D: Come on. Knock, knock.
S: Who's...*HISSING*
D: Still got it
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Kat: My boys 😭
Nat : It's Jensen face
The little shit face 
Giulia: Well I don t see white foam
Nat : Are you surprised?
Zee: My god
D: Just when we thought we had a choice. You know, whenever we thought we had free will. We were just rats in a maze. Sure, we could go left. Sure, we could go right. But we were still in the damn maze. Just makes you think, if all of it... you know, everything that we've done...What did it even mean?
S: It meant a lot. We still saved people.
D: Yeah, but what for? You know?  Just so he could throw another End of the World at us and then sit back and chug popcorn?
Giulia: I wanna chug popcorn
Nat : Yeah, ya did Sam
Nat : But I get Dean
Zee: Sam still believes
S: But now he’s gone
Nat : YA THINK
S: He gets bored and... and... and... and pulls the ripcord.I mean, that's what he did with Apocalypse World and... and probably with all of them. He moves on, starts another story. But you know what?
Giulia: GOOD
S: For the first time. It's just us.
Zee: What’s one more apocalypse right?
Giulia: 
“What’s one more apocalypse right?” -shit that SPN fans says
S: When we win this, God's gone There's no one to screw with us. There's no more maze. It's just us. And we're free.
D: So you and me versus every soul in Hell? I like those odds.
D: Well, you know what that means.
S: We got work to do.
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Giulia: WHAT
Giulia: ALREADY
Nat : WHAT
Zee: Why is it over ?
Giulia: ...it flew
Kat: Hehehe
Nat : FINISHED?
Nat : EH
Nat : WAIT WAS THAT 40 MINUTES ALREADY
Kat: That end though
Giulia: ...what
Nat : What
Giulia: What happened
Kat: The throwback
Zee: Yeah it was
Giulia: what trip was that
Zee: I just exhaled
Nat : What was that
Giulia: WE VE GOT WORK TO DO
Giulia: That was so fast
Kat: SOBA
Giulia: TRAILER
Nat : I hate them
Zee: Oh come on
Nat : i am watching trailer now
Giulia: EH NOTHING MUCH
Kat: Yeah
Nat : LOL I KNOW AS MUCH AS I DID BEFORE
Kat: WHAT
Nat : WTF
Kat: IT’S OVER
Nat : I am not overly impressed
Nat : Dean didn’t finish his knock knock joke
Nat : I’m sangry
.
Next -----> 15x02  "Raising Hell"
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.SO ...that was our last first episode screening, ever....GREAT.
If you want to get tagged send an ask HERE or to @waywardbaby or a smoke signal, idk whatever I’m tired af.
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flying-elliska · 5 years ago
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Hi Ellie!! I hope u dont mind this ask ❤Do u have any advice on how to do stuff on your checklist and not get overwhelmed? I can hardly do one thing out of my to do list and then i get severely depressed for not being able to do anything. i dont think i can function like a human being sometimes. anyway youre so cool ellie!!! i admire you loads!!! - help asked from one adhd struggling teen
HI anon ! I’m sorry for not answering sooner i had a beautiful answer ready and then Tumblr just ate it T_T anyway i don’t mind at all i think it’s awesome that you’re asking me ! this is honestly still something I’ve struggled a lot with. here are a few things that helped me (keep in mind i’m not a professional and this is only my personal, limited point of view) :
- ofc the first thing is to get as much help as you can, there are lots of people out there who can help. Generally talk to people around you about your problems ; often they want to help and just don’t know how : i know the tendency to feel ashamed and keep it in but that’s not good. Some people might be a bit ignorant so maybe keep a few ressources on hand you can send to people to educate them if that’s an issue ; and educate yourself so you feel more secure and legitimate in your opinions. 
- one thing that’s helped me lots is to go on #ADHDtwitter and #Neurodiversesquad because a lot of people on there are actual adults who are sharing both their struggles but also tips on how to actually manage the symptoms and have full and happy, if messy, lives. It’s very inspiring. It helped me a lot to feel understood, less alone and gave me a ton of ideas. Some accounts to start with : @ danidonovan - @ blkgrllostkeys @ ADHD_Alien (her comics are so cute) @ dustyexner plus lots of others
- regarding having trouble doing things, this is definitely a Big Damn Problem for adhd folks. the concept of the emotional Wall of Awful really helped me with this, you can find more about it in this Youtube video by the awesome How To ADHD channel (all her videos are so helpful !! have a look!) basically the idea is that we accumulate emotions linked to certain tasks based on unhappy past emotions that make it a lot harder for us to do things and that building it down takes a lot of time and effort but there are ways to work with/around that. learning to process, connect to and be more mindful of our emotions is a huge task, but it’s often a central one. 
- don’t try too hard to be neurotypical aka ‘normal’. find the solutions that work for YOU. If they’re a bit weird ? Whatever. The point is that it works. You will probably end up having weird routines that make no sense to others but it doesn’t matter as long as it helps you. Be creative and don’t be afraid to think outside the box. I’ll give you an example :  one of the reasons i hate going to bed early is because late at night is when i feel the most free of outside obligations and therefore i don’t want to give that up. So instead what i’ve been trying to do from time to time is a ‘clown hour’ where i basically give myself permission to do whatever the fuck i want (within reason lmao) but in an active way ; basically indulge my rebellious inner 8 yr old. Last time I ended up watching martial arts videos on youtube and practicing kickboxing kicks on the Mulan soundtrack and then put on funeral music and improvised my own eulogy by thinking about what i would like people to say about me after my death. Lmao that sounds completely wack when explained to other people but the point is - stuff like that really helped me reconnect to the idea that my time is mine to do with as i please, not just late at night. Anyway my point is : make it fun, make it a game, try things, experiment. Our brains crave novelty and if they don’t have it and feel burdened by shame, pressure and expectations of course they get depressed and stuck. Give your brain the fuel it needs to work. 
- just accept that sometimes you’re going to be a mess. it’s okay. you can be a bit of a mess and also live a fully, happy, joyous life. our society puts so much pressure on us to have this Perfect Instagram Life where everything is polished to unrealistic standards and gives us the idea that your morals are linked to productivity and if you are not constantly striving to be a Model Consumer Pretty Picture you are a Bad Person and a slob/lazy/unworthy/etc and all of that is...toxic garbage of the highest order that everyone should unlearn but especially us. related to that i would be careful with use of social media, tailor it to only give you content that makes you feel good/intellectually engaged/creative because it’s so easy for us to go into bad comparative spirals.
- tied to that be careful of your own perfectionist drives. it’s veeeeery common for adhd people to want to overcompensate their perceived shortcomings by wanting to be perfect. aka you haven’t done anything in weeks and all of a sudden you have this insane to do list where you expect yourself to turn your entire life around in a week. well, not going to happen. i’ve found it so important to limit myself. for instance what i do now is i forbid myself to put more than 5 items on any todo list. once i’ve cleared items i can add more, but not before. it’s a lot less scary that way. also prioritizing is very important so you don’t get bogged down in details.
- try to be mindful of your own energy. a big tendency of adhd people is to overpromise and underdeliver because we are enthusiastic and we want to please people but we are bad at estimating time/energy it will need. learn more about your own boundaries, what things are hard for you to do (for me, it’s socializing in groups) and what gives you energy (for me it’s writing, reading and walking in the woods) and try to balance that. learn to say no, it’s tough but necessary. So that you have enough left for the tasks you need to do. 
- create an environment that is benevolent and helpful for you in which to work/do things and that generates positive emotions. Get yourself a cute notebook. Put on happy music. Don’t forget to feed yourself. Don’t give into the urge of punishing yourself. You deserve happy good things - not overindulgence as escape - but our brains thrive on short term rewards. Bundle the unpleasant tasks with more stimulating stuff (for instance i always listen to podcasts while cleaning/grocery shopping etc). Create pleasant little routines for yourself (for instance one of the first things i try to do in the morning is do a little drawing of my emotions, it makes me happy, then i have tea and i plan my day.). Put on alarms constantly so you don’t lose track of time, but with a cool song. Find yourself cheerleaders who can encourage you in a positive way. Stuff like the pomodoro technique, timing yourself while doing a task, etc, can really help. Or telling yourself you will do a thing for ten minutes and stop when it’s unbearable, etc. Prioritize joy, pride, affection, desire to help, altruism, love, curiosity, interest and passion as motivators, instead of anxiety, guilt and shame. 
- find ways to build self esteem and confidence in your own skills. it’s often a lack of that that can block you from doing what you need to because you might be afraid of screwing it up. what I did for a while, for instance, is to keep a record of the stuff i did everyday and then extrapolated the skills i displayed from that. another thing you can do is make a list of simple skills you want to learn and find ways to do that, like youtube tutorials, etc. especially when it’s practical stuff and quick to learn, it can really feel so good, and make you more familiar with a sensation of success (and if you fail it can be a fun experiment gone wrong, and self discovery, you don’t have to be good at everything.)
- find ways to challenge yourself. depression happens for adhd people when we let ourself stagnate, isolate ourselves because of shame, and get into this idea that we are subhuman and we don’t deserve good things. that is false. you deserve a happy life. and our brains crave novelty. find your passion and indulge in it, find the things that make your brain come alive (as long as they’re healthy ofc). if you’re not sure what that is, just keep trying. you will find it. but resist the temptation to make your life smaller and smaller. you might mess up but that’s okay. it’s human and it will make for interesting stories later. instead of trying too hard to ‘fix’ yourself, focus on developping your positive sides. it will give you energy, self-respect and draw you forwards like a rocketship. we thrive on passion, not reprimand. 
- anyways : i know how tough it can be. depression is really something i struggle with, too. and doing things remains Hard. but my point is, you are not alone, and you are not broken. chances are you too, like most adhd people i know, are a fun, creative, compassionate person with a heart of gold and so much to give. our main enemy is most often the shame that comes with living in a world that is not adapted to us. but the truth is we are just playing the game of life on a much harder setting than a lot of people, and we don’t even have the manual. of course it’s going to create struggle ! so i think the best thing to do for yourself is cultivate a sense of compassion towards yourself, self acceptance, and humor. 
- as a teen you probably have a limited margin of autonomy to make your lifestyle fit your needs but - there is so much potential for it to get better ! as you grow in self knowledge and ability to make your own choices, you will find the right solutions and your life will get so much better. i have heard so many stories like this. since i got diagnosed, too, my life got a lot better. i won’t lie, it’s a lifelong process. but there is so much possible. give yourself time. you are so young, and you are definitely a human being. being human is struggling with being flawed and vulnerable and imperfect. i know the world can be shit sometimes, you probably got some negative messages - especially from your own brain bc depression definitely lies to you ! but don’t let yourself be guided by ignorance and fear. you deserve better. i bet you’re also super cool. the happier you are, the better off the world will be. so invest in yourself. educate yourself, develop your self knowledge, be kind to yourself, and keep making little steps. you’ll get there. <3
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