#which is honestly eben more fucked up. god

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

the dire need to overshare has struck

[sturnioloshacker]

Chills - A Corbyn Besson Imagine 3/5

Requested: No

Warnings: Some steamy scenes which leads into a bit of sexy time 😏

Corbyn always loved to show his girl how he felt about her. Sweet compliments, cute gestures, soft kisses and gentle touches were her weaknesses and Corbyn always loved that he was able to make her weak. While Corbyn was away on the 8 Letters tour, his little baby would lay in bed and feel herself up the way Corbyn does. She missed his touch so much that she started to think about him touching her in her most sensitive spot. After coming back from tour and hearing about the naughty things she did, Corbyn decided that it was time to make her weak in a completely different way...

Coat, laying on the floor, Long December nights are what I've been waitin' for, Pull my hand close to the fire...

Today is the first time I’m seeing Corbyn since he came back from tour. I’m a bit nervous because of everything that has happened while he’s been away. I missed him so much that I started thinking about how he makes me weak with every little thing he does. I missed him so much that my hands went down my pants and to my sensitive spot where I’ve been waiting for him touch there. I’ve been dating Corbyn for almost 2 years and not once have we had any sort of contact down there. I’ve been so patient but now I need that satisfaction and I need it from Corbyn. Now he’s back, I hope that at some point, I get it. I just need to tell him what I’ve done. Will he get angry? Will he laugh? Will he take me to our room and get it on with me? I hope it’s the third option.

I knock on the door to Corbyn’s house and Eben opens the door. I’m extremely close with Eben and I tell him everything. Now that I think about it, I might tell him what happened. I hug Eben and walk inside. “Where’s Corbs?” I ask, putting my coat and bag away. “He’s just grabbing dinner for us. He’ll be back soon”. I nod as I sit down. “Eben! Can I ask you something?” Eben sits down and takes my hands in his. “What’s up?” I explain everything and he sits there and nods. “Well damn! It’s obvious you missed him”. I look down and then back up at Eben. “I don’t know what to do! Should I tell him? Should I leave it and wait for him to decide when the time is right?” 

The door opens and Corbyn walks through. “You should just tell him”, Eben suggested. “Tell me what?” We whip our heads around to find Corbyn getting dinner ready. “Um.... can we talk after dinner? Just us two?” you ask. “Of course, baby. Everything okay?” Corbyn asks, concern plastered on his face. “Yeah. I just missed you, that’s all!” I smile and kiss his cheek before helping him with dinner. 

Shiverin', I'm shiverin', I can't stop, Give me the look, you know the one I want, I've been waiting for, It's so cold, it's so cold, yeah...

“What do you want, baby? Show me what you want”, Corbyn says as he teases me relentlessly. I give him a look and he knows exactly what I want. He pushes me so I’m laying on my back and he forces his pants down. “Is this what you want?” Corbyn mumbles as he kisses my inner thigh. “Yes! Fuck!” I cry out. He slowly pushes in and I instantly feel my walls wrap around his dick. “Fuck Corbyn! Go faster, please!” I moan and he speeds it up. God he’s so good! This is honestly so much better than my fingers and toys!

I got chills when you walk, Chills when you talk, Chills every time you say my name, It's the way that it feels when we touch, I can't get enough, Love got me frozen in place...

“What’s my name, babygirl?” Corbyn mumbles against my neck, leaving sloppy kisses there. “C-C-Fuck! Corbyn!” I manage to moan out. “I don’t think that’s correct princess. “What’s my name?” He thrusts a little harder and that ignites a fire in my stomach. “Daddy oh fuck!” 

Arms wrapped around my neck, You keep me warm, You are the spark igniting me again, Oh, I can't get enough of you...

I wrap my arms around Corbyn’s neck as he pounds into me. Moans and whimpers filled the air as the love making session continues. “Corbyn... oh fuck I’m gonna cum”. Corbyn speeds it up and I start to feel my walls clench and the knot in my stomach unravel. “Cum for me princess”. We both hit our highs and my god it felt amazing. Corbyn pulls out and I slowly come down from what was the best orgasm I’ve had in so long. Corbyn hops off the bed and heads to the bathroom to clean up. He comes back with a wet towel and helps me clean up my mess. “Thanks babe”. 

But when we kiss, I feel a jump in my heart, The same feeling that I felt from the start...

Corbyn comes back and pulls me into his chest. “You okay?” I nod in approval and he pulls me closer. “That was amazing!” I say and we both laugh. “That’s what happens when you’re naughty”, he chuckles. “Maybe I should be naughty again!” I say and he laughs. “I love you so much. I’m so glad you’re back”. Corbyn kisses my forehead. “I love you too”. Corbyn kisses me and it felt so magical. Kisses after sex are the best.

“Oi Corbyn! Can I quickly just grab the shampoo?” Eben asks. “Go ahead!” Eben walks in and grabs the shampoo from the shower. “Fuck babe. You’re so tight! Oh my god!” Eben mumbles under his breath. “Oh god. Did you hear that?” Corbyn asked. “Man, I heard everything!” Eben laughs as he leaves the room. “Maybe next time, we do it when we’re alone”, Corbyn says before placing a kiss on my lips once more. “I agree”. 

[whydontwe-fanfics]

Unexpected pt.2 (J.M)

Description: The boys and Jonah go through deep regret while you go through heartbreak.

Part 1 Part 3

(Heads up! Everything in italics are memories)

Word Count: 3.3k

---

Jonah didn't remember when or why it started. If he took a reasonable guess, he'd say that his little fling with Maya started about a month before you found out. He met her at a music store and shamefully thought that she was beautiful. Maya didn't know Jonah was with anyone, so she didn't see why starting something would be so terrible.

When Jonah first invited her over to the house, the boys were all very confused. He was in a relationship with their best friend, so why would he bring another girl over? Jonah could still remember Daniel and Corbyn pulling him into a separate room to drown him in questions, both of their voices laced with disappointment and anger.

"She's just a friend," Jonah shrugged.

"Does Y/N know about this friend?" Jack asked as he and Zach entered the room, both of their eyebrows risen with skepticism.

"No. She doesn't need to know all of my friends," Jonah said. "I just brought Maya here to hang out."

"This is messed up," Corbyn scoffed, walking out of the room.

"I swear to God if you cheat on Y/N-" Daniel starts.

"Relax. I'd never do that to Y/N," Jonah shook his head.

"You know if Y/N knew, she wouldn't-"

"She won't know," Jonah deadpanned. "She doesn't need to. And you guys don't need to mention it."

"So we'll be lying to our best friend?" Jack rolled his eyes.

"It's not lying if you just don't bring it up."

"It's lying," Zach said.

"No, it's not," Jonah argued.

"You know if Y/N finds out, she'll be pissed that we were all keeping this from her," Daniel added.

"Not just that, but if you and this Maya chick aren't doing anything, it'll look even more suspicious to Y/N if she does find out," Zach crossed his arms.

"This is ridiculous, Y/N needs to know so she doesn't get the wrong idea," Jack scoffed.

"Dude," Jonah warns.

"She's my best friend, Jonah," Jack frowned.

"And you're my best friend, too," Jonah countered, making Jack feel conflicted.

"Jonah, this isn't right," Zach reasoned.

"You guys are making it a bigger deal than it is," Jonah stated.

"And you'll be making this all go downhill when you 'accidentally' kiss Maya," Daniel furrowed his eyebrows.

"I would never do that to Y/N," Jonah started to grow annoyed.

"Then what's the problem with-"

"Guys. Just chill the fuck out. Maya is just a friend. Y/N is my girlfriend. That's all there is to it."

And that was the last of the conversation that day. Jonah eventually took Maya up to his room and left the four other boys shaking their heads with disapproval towards the entire situation.

Ever since that day, whenever you were busy and not at the boys' house, Maya was there. She thought she'd at least be somewhat good friends with the boys by now but every time they were in the same room they all wouldn't even spare a glance at her. They always grew uncomfortable looks when she walked through the front door and whenever she'd try to be respectful and say hi, they'd give her curt nods before going back to doing what they were doing.

To the boys' knowledge, Maya and Jonah were just 'friends'. What they didn't know was that the two had shared multiple make-out sessions on his bed.

If they had known, there'd be no doubt that they'd tell you. But you didn't know that.

That day, after you ran out with tears running down your face, they had come to the conclusion that Jonah had in fact cheated on you. And to you, it looked like they knew about it, too.

It's been two weeks since the last time the boys have seen you. Two weeks since they've heard from you. Two weeks full of endless mental torture, guiltiness, and regret.

"You alright?" Jack's low voice asked as he leaned against the wall of the hallway. Jonah stood in front of the mirror in one of the bathrooms of the house, the door wide open.

"I think we all know the answer to that," Jonah muttered before flicking the light off and exiting the restroom. "I'm pretty sure she's blocked me on every single thing known to man and iPhones."

"Reasonably," Daniel inputted as he walked out of his room. Jonah let out a sigh as he ran a hand down his face.

"I went to her house with Corbyn and Jack yesterday, but Mark was there and I'm a hundred percent sure he despises me," Jonah told Daniel.

"Reasonably," Daniel added, repeating himself. "You cheated on his fucking little sister because you're a horny bastard. If I'm gonna be honest, I think you should just stop trying."

"Yeah, when hell cools down," Jonah scoffs.

"Jonah, you cheated on her. You didn't just forget her birthday or get into a small argument about God knows what. You went and got together with an entirely different woman while you were supposedly devoted to Y/N and Y/N only. She was your girlfriend that trusted you enough to not even bother suggesting to herself that you might go and hook up with someone else while she was away. You're my best friend, and you asked us not to tell her, but that was our mistake. And now we all have no choice but to deal with it," Daniel explains, his arms crossed. Jonah didn't want to listen anymore but he knew Daniel was right. They all knew what they did was wrong and now they'd have to pay for it, in which losing a very important person in their lives was the cost.

"I just," Jonah choked. "I just miss her. So fucking much," he muttered, running a hand down his face and rubbing at his chin.

"We all do," Jack sighed. "She won't answer any of our calls, either."

"Yeah, because she thought we knew about Jonah swapping saliva with Maya," Daniel ran a hand through his hair, still not over the fact that Jonah lied every time they had asked him if he had done anything with Maya.

"All I want is to see her. Just see that she's alright," Jonah elaborated.

Jack opened his mouth to say something when they hear Corbyn call for them downstairs.

"Let's go, already! I'm hungry!" Corbyn shouted and they all remembered that they were all supposed to be getting ready for some sushi restaurant they were going to.

'You loved sushi', Jonah thought solemnly as the boys head downstairs and out of the house.

The entire ride to the restaurant, Jonah sat up front in the passenger seat while staring down at his Instagram page, wincing every time he saw you in a picture with either him or the boys, the smile he loved imprinted on your face.

"You're driving back," Daniel slapped Jonah's chest with the back of his hand as everyone climbed out. Jonah felt a shiver run down his spine as his eyes landed on the restaurant he'd taken you to dozens of times before.

Jonah hopped out of the car as you all headed to the sushi place, heading to the table that already had their friend, Eben, sitting at it.

Though the second Jonah sat down in the booth beside Jack, his eyes lifted up and scanned the restaurant. He almost choked when his eyes landed on you.

You sat across the large room, your eyes drifted downwards as you poke at your sushi roll. Your hair he had twirled around his fingers hundreds of times was up in a ponytail, hairs falling in your face.

Your face was stoic as you kept your eyebrows furrowed, looking as though you were in deep thought, and Jonah had a pretty good idea of what was occupying your mind.

Jonah's eyes narrowed slightly when he saw a male figure slide into the seat across from you, resulting in you picking up your head.

You looked up when you saw Derek take a seat in front of you, his voyage to the bathroom over.

Derek was a friend you had made not too long ago. You had met him on the plane back to Florida and was ecstatic when you found out he was moving in with his mom a few blocks away. You two quickly enough became close, but as for now the relationship between you two was strictly platonic.

"You still haven't touched your food," Derek frowned, crossing his arms on the table and leaning forward.

"I think I'm a bit too queasy for sushi right now," you poked and prodded at the raw fish.

"I thought you loved sushi. That's the reason I suggested we come here," Derek frowned.

"I do love sushi. A lot. I'm just not in the mood," you tell him honestly and he nods understandably.

"It's alright. We could head back to your place and eat couch stuffings," he grinned, bringing up an inside joke that was too complicated to explain. A small smile spread on your face as you shook your head and stayed staring at the food before you.

"I'm down," you shrug.

"Alright. I'll ask for some boxes to pack this up. We both know tomorrow when you're hungry you'll swallow it whole."

"You're right," you sigh, resting your jaw in the palm of your hand as your elbow perches itself on the table.

"I'll be back," Derek rose to his feet but paused before leaving. "Chin up. You can't let that asshat take over your life. When I come back I wanna see a smile on that face," he flicks your chin up with his index finger, raising a single eyebrow.

"Yeah, yeah," you mumble, letting a sigh fall from your lips. Derek sadly smiles before walking away to the front desk.

Jonah felt his jaw clench at the sight of you with this guy, and he knew he was in the wrong because it was all his fault that the relationship ended in the first place.

"What are you looking a-" Corbyn cuts himself off when he looks in Jonah's line of vision. "Oh shit."

"What?" Daniel joins in and is also gobsmacked when he sees what the fuss is about.

"Is that-?" Jack narrows his eyes for a second before they grow wide.

"I'm gonna go talk to her," Jonah catches everybody off guard.

"What? No! Don't do that! Did you not hear a word I said earlier?" Daniel asked.

"Daniel's right, it'd be best if we just leave her alone," Jack interjected, his eyes not leaving your distant figure as you stare at your food, a dazed look on your features.

"I don't care, I want to talk to her," Jonah begins to get up but freezes when he sees someone walk through the doors of the sushi place.

"Well this is fucking great," Jack says monotonously.

"Hold up- is that-? Is that Maya?" Corbyn nearly chokes.

"What is she doing here?" Jack asks.

"I'm guessing to eat some sushi," Zach mumbles and Daniel nods with flattened lips.

"If so, then why is she walking straight towards Y/N?" Jack begins to panic.

"Thanks for bringing us into your bullshit, man," Corbyn pats Jonah on the back.

They all got quiet when Maya went to stand right in front of you, her hands by her side. You hadn't realized she had approached you until she quietly cleared her throat.

Your eyes shot upwards to her face and your back stiffened when you recognized her features oh so clearly. It was as if your tongue got caught in your throat and you wanted to puke it out.

"Hi, I'm Maya," the girl introduces herself. You didn't say anything back, being that you were as sure as daylight that she knew who you were. She had been the one you caught on top of your ex-boyfriend. "We saw each other the other day, and I just wanted to let you know that I'm so very sorry. Jonah hadn't told me he had a girlfriend already and if he did I would have never even thought of acting so intimately with him - I'm not that kind of girl- at least I never wanted to become that girl. What he did was wrong and I feel like shit for unknowingly doing that to someone else because if I was in your shoes, I'd castrate that dick-head for cheating on such a beautiful girl like you." She took in a deep breath when she was done talking.

You didn't know how to respond. Too many thoughts were floating around in your mind.

She's definitely prettier than me. Is that why Jonah cheated. Had he really not told Maya about you? Was he looking forward to just starting an entirely new relationship while still in one with you? You really should've castrated him.

"I-I don't know what to say," you mutter. "Thanks. For apologizing even though it isn't your fault. It's just... I never would've thought Jonah would do something like that," you say more-so to yourself. Had you really known Jonah?

"I didn't know I'd run into you here, but when I saw you I knew I had to clear things up with you."

"That means a lot to me, thank you," you once again thank her. She gives you a sympathetic smile before nodding and heading to go sit with her friends.

Throughout the entire conversation, your eyebrows stayed scrunched together. When Maya walked away, you felt sick to your stomach.

Derek walked back just in time to see your face turn practically green.

"Y/N, you look like your about to throw up," he frowned, quickly putting her food in one of the boxes.

"I really don't feel good," you mutter, taking deep breaths through your nose.

"Okay. Okay, we're gonna get you home so you can lay down, alright?" He quickly placed the boxes in the bags.

"Mhm," you hummed halfheartedly. You slid your phone into your back pocket before slowly standing up. Before Jonah and the boys knew it, you two were heading out.

"What did Maya say?" Daniel mumbled to himself, him and the rest of the boys all out of hearing distance.

"Doesn't matter; Y/N!" Jonah stood from where he sat and called your name right before you officially walked out that door.

"What the fuck are you-" Jack tried to get him to sit back down, but they all knew they couldn't stop Jonah.

You froze in your steps as Derek held the door open for you. Was that-?

A part of you didn't want to turn around, but the other part wanted to put a face to a name. Deep down you knew who had called your name. You just wanted the confirmation.

Slowly looking back to where you heard your name being called, your eyes quickly scanned the room before you saw Jonah standing beside a table with the rest of the boys.

Your eyes widened twice as large and you felt panic subside in you.

"Who's he?" Derek questions, furrowing his eyebrows.

"Someone I would rather never see again, let's go," you rush out of your mouth before walking out of the restaurant with Derek hot on your trails. You tried to put more of a pep in your step, heading to Derek's car.

"Y/N, wait!"

By now, you knew he was following you and the only thought running through your mind was how slow Derek was being.

"Derek, unlock your car," you hustle.

"Who is this dude? You want me to handle it?"

"No, no, it's fine-" you were cut off when you felt his grip on your forearm. You turned and felt sick inside when your eyes landed on Jonah. It was as if your blood ran cold and you knew that all you had left was hatred towards him.

"Hey, hands off her, buddy," Derek began to grow hostile.

"Who the hell are you?" Jonah asks him.

"Derek, let's go," you grumble, ripping yourself from Jonah's hold and pulling on Derek's wrist.

"I just want to talk," Jonah let out, defeated.

"Leave me alone, Jonah," you shout just as you and Derek reach his car, but Derek stopped walking when he heard the name that left your lips.

"This is Jonah?" Derek crossed his arms and turned back around.

"Just leave it," you begged, opening the front passenger side's door.

"This is the douche bag who-"

"Derek," you warned. He scoffed and ran a hand down his face as Jonah stared him down.

"Stay the fuck away from Y/N," Derek points at your ex.

"And who are you to tell me what to do? This is between Y/N and I," Jonah argued.

"Not if I don't want to talk to you," you spat back, venomously. "After some time, it does become harassment."

"Please, Y/N. I miss you," Jonah reached a hand up to his hair, harshly grabbing at it.

"It didn't look like that when she sat on your lap giving you the time of your life," you rolled your eyes. "You seem to have already gotten over me while we were still in a relationship, what's so hard about doing so now?"

Your eyes shift from Jonah to the boys who all come parading out of the sushi place. A huff of disbelief left your mouth when you see them all go to stand beside Jonah.

You slide into the car and slam the door shut as Derek climbs into the driver's seat, closing his door as well.

"That dick," Derek mumbled as he started the engine. You kept your eyes on your lap as he took the car out of park mode and drove off, leaving the five boys behind. "I could've beat him right there and then, you know."

You had told Derek about Jonah not too long ago. It was a short conversation and you didn't want to go too deep into it all, but the basics have been covered with Derek - that being you were cheated on by a boy named Jonah.

---

You sat on your living room couch with your legs crossed before you. Your body was accompanied by a thick pair of leggings and a random graphic tee with about twenty stains that haven't washed out in years.

You had your youngest sister, Evelyn, in your lap as you braided her hair just for the hell of it. She was watching cartoons on the television while you listened to music with one earbud in, your laptop placed beside you with an open Tumblr tab on it.

"Y/N!" You heard your other sister, Cara, drag your name out in her whine.

"Yes?!" You called back.

"It's Jack and Daniel and Corbyn and Zach!" You heard her call back. You furrowed your eyebrows, confused as to why she was saying their names. You stopped braiding Evelyn's hair and pulled the one earbud out of your ear, turning your head to face the hallway that leads to the kitchen and front door. Your eyes widened when you saw Cara standing at the open door.

"Cara! You're not supposed to open the door without telling me," you scold, shifting Evelyn off your lap and onto her feet as you get up and head over to the door.

Irritation ran through you when you saw the four boys gathered on your porch.

"Y/N!" Evelyn complained, running after you. "You didn't finish my hair," she whined.

"What are you guys doing here?" You sigh. "When will you understand that I don't want to speak with or see any of you?"

"Why not?" Cara asked you, making you realize that both your sisters were standing beside you.

"Because Jonah kissed another girl," Evelyn loudly whispers to Cara, who gasped loudly.

"How do you know?" Cara asked Evelyn.

"I was fake sleeping on the couch when Y/N and Derek was talking and-"

"Alright, both of you, go. Now," you demand, pointing to the stairs.

"Why?" Cara frowned while Evelyn stomped her foot.

"You didn't finish my hair!" She points out.

"I'll do it later," you sigh.

"But I want it done now!"

"Evelyn," you warn, staring at her with one risen eyebrow. The little girl huffs before stomping off up the stairs with Cara following behind.

Unfortunately, you still had four unwanted guys on your doorstep. You really wanted to close the door in their face, but you knew it wouldn't end there.

---

Masterlist | Request Here

[wereg0blin]

for the ask meme? all of them u thot

For ur and Cris' demand1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?Yes!!!!! 2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now?UhHHHHHH it is 3 years older than me but hhhhhhh probably not3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time?Bicth ten mins ago4. Would you ever smile at a stranger?ALWAYS5. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?If there are they can go fuck themselves right in the butthole6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today?CHOKE-I dont know how but they found me - mr seen aka my eX hHHhH7. What exactly are you wearing right now?a cute ass blouse thingy some tights and christmas deer antlers on top of a Santa hat8. How often do you listen to music?every chance i get9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more?jeans i guess10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2013?i dont even remember 201311. Are you a social or an antisocial person?both damn12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter ‘A’?On the cheek yes13. What about ‘R’?platonically yes14. Can you drive a stick shift?i can climb sticks???? does that count??? 15. Do you care if people talk badly about you?they 100% do and i dont really care bc everyone talks shit about everyone 16. Are you going out of town soon?i dont know how to reply to this because i live in two towns17. When was the last time you cried?Wednesday i think,, i wish i could cry more often 18. Have you ever told someone you loved them?i try to say it as much as i can bc i have a lot of love in my heart19. If you could change your eye color, would you?maybe a lighter blue bc gray blue isn't that pretty20. Is there a boy who you would do absolutely everything for?not counting evan,,, uhh Boys ARE A BLESSING TO THIS WORLD FUXK YEAH21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having.am planning to tell mh parents abt my depression but hHHHHH22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead?if it has boy in it iT CUTE23. Are you dating the last person you talked to?NopE cris is like,,,, my best friend wtf24. What are you sitting on right now?b e d i t s o f t25. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you?FRIENS. LOVE THEM. 26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?ALL THW TIME B I TCH27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night?my roommates 28. Do you get a lot of colds?nop, but when i do its fuxked up29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from?Switzerland 30. Does anyone hate you?yepity depity do and i hope they burn in hell fucking pieces of shits31. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room?it will be a cold day in hell when i drink my dudes32. Do you like watching scary movies?BITCH I L OV E MAKING FUN OF MOVIESSO SEEING SHITTY SCARY MOVIES IS A FUCKING BLESSING 33. Do you want your tongue pierced?Nah how tf am i gonna eat spicy shit then???? ¿¿¿¿34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be?2015????or 2016??? i think that was the worst my depression ever was35. Did you have a dream last night?i think????? 36. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?right now37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?hope not???? but then again???? kinda hope i do????? probably not doe38. Do you think someone has feelings for you?yes i know at least 2 boys and i feel so sorry for them39. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?probs40. Did you have a good day yesterday?mmmeh41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship?oh shit i have no Fucking idea 42. In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a girl?y e s43. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?i think???? cris must've told me at least one time and evan too so Uhhhh i guess???? ¿¿¿¿44. What’s the best part about school?i get to have unnecessary crushes45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook?ppppplenty46. Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school?yeah but he called me a slut and a whore 47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head?god fucking hell all the time 48. Were you single over the last summer?yep49. Is your life anything like it was two years ago?nope thank the whatever the fuck is out there 50. What are you supposed to be doing right now?sleeping i guess51. Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with?evan is a precious cinnamon roll fuck off 52. Are you nice to everyone?YES YES YES YES ALWAYS as i saidk i l l t h e m w i t h k i n d n e s s53. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?h hh hhh fuCking tAke a wIld Gue Ss m854. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?bitch when i cheat will be the day i cut my throat 55. Are you good at hiding your feelings?bad feelings? yescrushes? n0Pe56. Do you think you like someone?i think but i hope not57. Have you kissed someone whose name starts with a ‘J’?nop i do not Think so my dude 58. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys?why THE FUCK would that matter59. Has anyone of your friends ever seen you cry?current ones?? i dont think so??? 60. Do you hate anyone?nah i just,,,, strongly dislike themexcept the fucking bitches i called friends i hopr they die in a fire 61. How’s your heart?idk i guess ok??? im always okay62. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about?not really pffft63. Have you ever cried over a guy?yes all the time,, boys r beautiful 64. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now?hmmmmmmmmm idk i can think of a few people but i hope not 65. Are your toenails painted pink?I W I S H66. Will your next kiss be a mistake?bih i wish i could have my first kiss67. Girls love it when boyfriends cry; correct?if boyfriend cries i cry thats bad 68. Have your pants ever fallen down in public?poor poor souls that actually had this happen to them69. Who was the last person you were on the phone with?my sister!!! 70. How do you look right now?bored Even doe im honestly just relaxed 71. Do you have someone you can be your complete self around?i do that with everyone bc if u don't like me u don't have tk be around me 72. Can you commit to one person?yes ofc!!!??? 73. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?even bby ilu74. Have you ever felt replaced?i think?? yes probs75. Did you wake up cranky?nop76. Are you a jealous person?hhhhHA YOU DONT EVEN K N O W77. Are relationships ever worth it?Theyre fun but the end of them makes me wanna die78. Anyone you’re giving up on?crushes and teachers 79. Currently wanting to see anyone?3 more years bih u better wait for meand u too eben b safe u dork80. Name something you have to do tomorrow?sssstudy h81. Last person you cried in front of?mom82. Is there someone you will never forget?yyyES83. Do you think the person you have feelings for is protective of you?nope he doesn't really care about me anymore (although i dont think he ever did) 84. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now?BICTH ID BE KISSING THAY THOT ALL OVER HER FACE AND WATCHING SAW AND VORING PIZZAEVEN DUDE HHHHELTS WATCH SAW 3 AND LAUGH AT THAT DUDE BREAKING HIS LEG AND THWN I CAN HUG YOU TILL I DIE FROM DEHYDRATION 85. Are you over your past?i ggggUess??? 86. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex?i have no idea 87. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to? @lady-misfortune @space-ace-sneevee @thelilshadowchild88. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?what has been has been but i guess idk yet bc ive had like 1 bf for now 89. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in?never kissed 90. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?i guess???????? 91. Will you be in a relationship in 2 months?i sure as hell have no idea92. Is there anyone you know with the name Michael?Michael Jackson and I are best buddies bItch93. Have you ever kissed a Matthew?noPe94. Were you in a relationship in January? How was it going?i was in a relationship with my laptop and i didnt leave him from 7pm to 6am 95. Were you happy with the person you liked in March?he a dicky 96. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive?bicth fucjing prettiest people youll find97. Who do you have texts from?crissy gorl that im too lazy to reply to98. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?happened to me and i said "glad u told me earlier i dont want u being with me if u r uncomfy" it did hurt like a fucking bitch doe99. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?bitch never kissed 100. Who’s in your profile picture with you?me, myself and i101. Ever kissed under fireworks?NEVER KISSED FFS102. Has anybody ever given you butterflies?IN a jar nicely packed and handed to me? no but stomach butterflies so bad i wanted to throw up? yes

[fmlfpl]

Lineup Lamentations - GW14

Our Transfers, Captains, and Starting 11s for the week!

No Slacker of the Week this week sorry about that bad job by me.

And if you missed it for subscribers Friday My Life episode just came out!

—

WALSH

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Sterling, Mount, Abraham

IN (for -8 points hit): Ozil, Lacazette, Son

Welcome back new and old friends.

Got rid of the pieces of shit who have been making me want to kill myself and in come players I love and who are not pieces of shit.

Really just rolling loose right now on that sweet sweet tilt, but hey, I am but a man.

Ozil picks himself with new bald manager bounce. I was even thinking of purchasing him before the good ebenings became bad ebenings and the firing gave me more than enough of an excuse to do. Laca I anticipate will be playing central striker so let's fucking go Laca. Was a close one with him versus Jesus but in the end pod partner was speaking good sense to me in saying Laca could be a long term hold.

Finally, after much deliberating over Alli my lover, I went with private corporal suonnyboy. Good player, good guy. Am a bit terrified of rotation but he is a fit machine so hopefully he isn't impacted. New look squad feels good if I can't figure out how to get green arrows at least I can figure out how to get friends in.

GK:

Pope (CRY)

Pope in the last good fixture before they turn for Burnley.

Will have to deliberate and think about whether or not I'll hold him past this weekend as the rest of my team suddenly looks good. Well it better look fucking good after I just took 12 point hits over this GW and last combined.

Pains me to say it but holy fucking hell do I need a 0-0 in this one.

DEF:

Alexander-Arnold & Robertson (BHA)

Trent and Robbo go.....again. Trent rested against Napoli was nice but am now worried about Robbo playing tomorrow. Pewps...we'll see.

Lundstram (wol)

Pointstram goes to the wolverines in a pretty bad fixture suddenly but fixtures don't matter for pointstram. Points incoming probably...as if it matters at this point anyway.

Kelly (bur)

Martin Kelly gets a run out for the first time this season for me with Ward's demise. Really fucking lucky shit for me and all other Kelly owners for Ward to die right before this tasty run of games and fixture pile up.

I'm planning on riding Kelly for the near term / as long as Ward is out so hopefully we pick up some cleans against all these shit ass teams.

MID:

De Bruyne (new), Ozil (nor), Son (BOU)

Suddenly I am stuck with just one City attacker..Kevin the ging...still feels fine though. Stats have been good even if his final balls have not looked so nice recently. Feel like he'll still just pick up points here and there even if City look a bit off it.

New friends mantis bug eyed god and private swan are accompanying Kevin this week and for the weeks to come. I think these three would really get along well IRL and in the locker room as they all offer something different and seem like they would compliment each others personalities really well.

Surely this will have a huge effect on their FPL point output. You're welcome.

FWD:

Kane (BOU), Lacazette (nor), Vardy (EVE)

Tasty front three for me suddenly with Kane, Laca, and Vardz.

Vardy and Kane both a couple of horses who should be able to take all the minutes they can handle in this holiday period.

Laca a massive differential at this moment and hoping that they completely dick over Farke's team this weekend. New manager bounce let's get it going.

CAP:

Kane (BOU)

Sticking with Kane this weekend again.

Bournemouth are in all sorts and will be missing Billing which is pretty big. Everton are also in complete and utter shambles and you really can't go wrong with Vardz. Looking to spike with the mouth breather....come on Harold fucking tit me one time lad.

—

ALON

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Sterling, Abraham

IN (for -4 points hit): Kane, Pulisic

It’s what I really wanted to do... Kane and Pulisic I really wanted them I couldn’t stop mentioning them on Friday My Life and here I am.

My dad and Walsh and my balls lead me towards moving out Raz instead of Mo (even though I think Mo out might’ve been more correct move) and alas here we are. Honestly? It feels great. If Raz hauls then Raz hauls (if he dies he dies) and life is life and I basically won’t know about it anyway because I’ll be on a train to Liverpool going to see Liverpool v. Brighton in real life.

Later Raz.

Kane is looking like a long term hold for me I’m loving what I’m seeing and honestly same with Pulisic. He’s breaking out before our eyes in what seems like an absolute worldy in the transfer market from Chelsea’s scouts. Good job by them.

Eden who?

GK:

Gazzaniga (BOU)

Two matches under Mou and four goals conceded so far so it’s not any sort of defensive fortress yettttttt but hopefully there will be improvement and I expect improvement. Clean would be cool.

DEF:

van Dijk (BHA)

No Fabinho, no cleans, ribcage knock, fuck. Why did I bring in VVD again?

I guess he almost scored vs. Palace and almost scored vs. Napoli maybe VVDue is back? TBD.

Can’t wait to watch him spraying passes tomorrow :heart_eyes:

Lundstram (wol)

Jim will probably get his normal one goal nine point haul and it’ll hurt even more this time... but maybe Lundy will come back the other end and put one in himself??? Whatever start Lund every week gonna be great gonna love it.

Söyüncü (EVE)

Soy clean looks pretty good here. Everton are on the brink of disaster as usual probably with an eye ahead towards the Merseyside Derbz.

Tomori (WHU)

Little sketchy seeing Tomori dropped for Christensen in UCL but then Chelsea were a sieve at the back and Valencia coulda/shoulda scored like 5 goals so I’m not worried. Straight back in for Tomo and hopefully a clean alongside him.

MID:

Salah (BHA)

The words come out of my mouth on Friday My Life where I’m like why do I even bother with Mo anymore and yet here I am again another week with Mo slotted straight in.

In my defense as I wrote above I’ll be at the match so that tipped the scales a lot in Mo’s favor.

Maddison (EVE)

Tick merchant set and forget.

Pulisic (WHU)

Very excited about Pulisic and his breakout. The kid is fucking awesome.

De Bruyne (new)

Kev is still great and a big part of what City do. Should trickle points.

FWD:

Kane (BOU)

Very happy to have Harry and planning on holding him for a while as long as he remains fit. I think Mou will bring the best out of him, or what’s left of him.

Vardy (EVE)

Yeah duh.

CAP:

Salah (BHA)

Easy. Thanks Dave and James and Bug.

[galimatios]

t/a rambles 1

back on my bullshit part 1

... should look into the tactics ogre games for novel inspo bc my novel is also a political drama ... UNINTENTIONALLY actually id call it a coming of age story in rhe new adult genre since mc is probably 23-25 i have so many feelings about the novel ugh i love my ocs so much and i put them all om opposing sides for this novel the most complex relationship i have in it i think is alex and his mother or rather prince kreutzer in this au queen elaine and her son prince kreutzer .. god its so fucked up bc kreutzer loves his mother- he was largely isolated as a child and his mother was always so loving and sweet and they were so so close but the prince never knew of the shit his mother did as queen she is a tyrant she must have lost a child once. a princess, i think probably to the king who she may have ... overthrew or usurped maybe but regardless of that shes in power now and because she lost a child she became overly protective of kreu and consolidated her power heard of a plot to infiltrate her kingdom and assassinate the son of the previous tyrant king (?) and she just fucking ruled with an iron fist because she has so little trust in the goodness of people that she thinks the only way to achieve good is to force it and as a result she kills anyone who steps out of line thus making the people resent her deeply but to kreutzer shes his mother his loving and doting mother who does all she can to protect him the novel actually starts um after the queen is assassinated h a its not her story but shes a big part of it even after her death bc a big portion of the theme is like coming to terms with the complexity of individuals no one is all good or all bad and kreu starts out unable to understand this he has a very black and white view of moralitt like his mother at the beginning on his coronation day theres an assassination attempt made on him but he gets whisked away by the court jester after that a coup is staged and rebels take over the country and the prince is forced to hide with a traveling circus that the jester brings him to where every performer... is a fugitive or criminal! and thats where his personal growth really begins bc he learns abt these people and realizes his world view was wrong people are complex people do bad things... for just reasons and vice versa esp Keith who makes a major appearance in the novel his entire bg story takes place outside the novel as well hahaha but its a lot after a raid on his village, hes orphaned along w his little sister who is ill so to make ends meet / buy medicine he does literally every fucking crime under the sun starting off with petty theft and scaling up to murder literally sacrificing every last shred of innocence he has for the sake of his ailing sister who... dies anyway! and im thinking, tbh, its a fantine/cosette/thenardiers type sitch where this quack doctor is basically scamming him except instead of fantine dying cosette does anyway thats where he fucking hits rock bottom he could handle things as long as he had someone to fight for you know he was alright with it bc his sister was there, his saving grace but when she dies hes all alone thats probably when lydia finds him i imagine he would he on the verge of suicide or at the very least dying of self imposed starvation and neglect but honestly probably suicide julie's death on top of the crushinf weight of all the crimes hes committed the innocence he lost, the lives he took its just way too much and hes just a naive kid lydia finds him and takes him back to the circus takes care of him gives him food and water and shelter and slowly tries to reach him slowly teaching him that there is still life to be lived that he is so young, and it is far too soon for him to lay down and die that he should live for his dead family, because that is what they would want to keep their memory alive in his heart and he begins to come around slowly starts doing chores for the troup then he finally sees one of their performances acrobats and the trapeze and the glitz and the glamor its the first time in years where he ... wasnt thinking about his dead sister or his trauma he asks lydia to teach him how to "do that" he says while pointing at the stage and so she does and ever since then hes taken up performing full time as a .. daredevil type act doing outrageously dangerous things for the thrill of it it excites him, the risk he loves to see how close to the edge of death he can walk without falling and it fuels him makes him enjoy being alive again and he's.. happy god by the time you meet keith in the novel he's just this happy go lucky teen with this smugness about him a kind of dangerousness belying a sweet exterior he's all jokes and laughs at this point and you'd never be able to tell what he went thru at first glance or at all really bc honestly, at this point he honest to god is okay lies and dirt - Last Thursday at 6:00 AM he... doesnt need anyone's pity. he doesn't need anything but the feeling of being alive now and one of the major points of the novel is prince kreu's relationship with him... bc at first they really clash and kreu is just... he's a fucking criminal and all of then deserve to hang keith plays this off w jokes at first but kreu keeps being antagonistic bc he just cant believe a criminal like him is getting away without punishment but then one day keith snaps at him knife to the prince's throat dangerous, cat like eyes, the usual smile on his face no where to be found you're right. i'm a thief. a liar. a criminal. a murderer. i'm all those things. but i'll tell you one thing, prince: i'm not worthless. he pulls the knife away and walks off leaving the prince stunned after this lydia talks to kreu explaining that maybe he shouldn't judge keith so quickly hinting that the circumstances of his life were... not ideal when i first found him, he was already half dead. perhaps not physically, but in the eyes. you could see the reaper in them. hhmgmgn i need to think more abt the circumstances around this scene ah keith must have been looking for a good place to die

the music from the circus reminded him of better days, when he played songs with his family. i imagine him.. outside the tent, somewhere obscured and there's music flowing from its interior... he's tired. he sits down against a barrel and he's been starving, exhausted... letting sleep take him away on the songs from the circus back to a time he used to be happy...

lydia fines him and shakes him but his eyes look glassy and he's unresponsive

he's taken poison must have been something from his former days working as an assassin something he saved for himself just in case and that's when lydia takes him in and nurses him back to health she's a water mage w healing capabilities so she's able to do it and i imagine at first keith is hurt, angry why am i still alive? i im fucking myself up in the feels i hate this THIS ISNT EBEN IN THE FUCKINF BOOK IT ALL HAPPENS BEFORE IT KEITJS NOT THE MAIN CHARACTER HERE BUT IM SO FUCKED UP ugh after kreutzer learns a bit abt keiiths origins he actually thinks a lot. and tries to make amends. apologizes to keith who doesnt say anything much he's sitting, eyes away from the prince, fiddling with the knives he uses for his performances

"a raid took my parents away. illness took away my sister."

"i did a lot of things for money. most of it i'm not proud of. but i would have done anything to save her... you know?"

"you've got someone you love too, don't you?" kreutzer thinks of his mother. the surrogate brother who disappeared on him and never returned "i do." "then, you get it." after this they start to really bond almost as siblings.. which is really funny bc kreutzer doesnt need to be protective of keith keith can MORE THAN take care of himself but its new for kreutzer to feel.. responsibility for someone else like this he was always the one protected before keith laughs at this a lot what're you trying to do? be my big bro? but secretly he ...really likes having family again as idiotic as kreutzer is ofc lydia has always been there for him but as a surrogate mother an older sib is new and.. kind of nice in canon modern au they really are basically bros LOL actually cousins via mothers but alex/kreu goes to live w keiths family after his mom (lain) dies so they essentially grow up like brothers i didn't even get started w the fucking mess that is alan and kreutzer alan goes by calisto also and he hes the court jester but he was trained from a young age as a snake in the kings court he was supposed to kill the prince when the time was right but alan and his dumb fucking gay ass FALLS IN LOVE WITH HIM INSTEAD spoiler alert: its unrequited btwn alex and alan is NEVER requited in ALL aus its because alan ... doesnt love himself at all. he has no sense of... purpose or identity alex can never love someone like that but either way he becomes the prince's personal servant and entertainer and this idiot falls for him the naivete he displays, the timid stateliness, the unfitting title of prince bestowed on his shoulders- kreutzer is far too soft to be the leader of this kingdom and alan increasingly has the desire to protect him even as kreu grows older and more skilled in his studies there is always the anxious trepidation they also grow up together from around ages 11-present at the time of the novels start god alan loves him so much it hurts me but its so one sided alex loves cyrus in modern au ): alan could never be more than just a phase tbh poor guy alan and his low self esteem and depression the worst part of this thougg is that because alan feels aimless and without purpose when he falls for kreutzer he ... finally has his OWN cause to fight for and he takes it to the extreme betraying everyone that trusted him to do his job for the sake of a man who wont ever love him it bites him in the ass too bc i kill him off as a catalyst for other stuff h ahahahhahahahahahahaha not just kill him off but horribly because HE FUCKING BETRAYED HIS ENTIRE SIDE THEY ARE, UNDERSTANDABLY, PISSED Alan is so fuckong flawed hes a fuckinf mess and i love it ugh im thinkijg of another scene in the novel once kreutzer gets captured bt the coup rebels he actuallt submits himself voluntarily bc keith gets kidnapped and used as ransom keith tells him hes a fucking idiot keiths life doesnt matter dont fucking come for me! but kreu doesnt listen obviously and they torture kreutzer bc i love suffering and after that they make him listen in a mock trial to the testimonials of all the people hurt by his mother death to the queen! death to elaine of koel! all the horrible stories of lives unjustly cut short because of his mother it breaks him because he loves his mother so much but she's done all these horrible things he doesn't know what to do how to make amends the damage was done and he takes their wrath their scorn and anguish and i'm sorry as if sorry could ever fix anything but it is his burden to carry, his punishment to suffer in place of the queen ironically this makes lilya have a change of heart she was infiltrating the queens court just as alan did and she is directly responsible for her death her assassination, i think or the king's? either way shes part of the rebel forces and she DESPISES the queen good fucking riddance as far as she's concerned that woman made her life hell(edited) so she can rot in it for all lilya cares for but seeing kreutzer there bloodied tortured sobbing broken and taking the punishment doled out to him without so much as a word of protest(edited) she thinks... this... isnt right this is wrong. because kreutzer was not responsible for the sins of his mother as much as people want to blame him, take out their anger on him lilya was at first all gung ho about ending the royal bloodline lies and dirt - Last Thursday at 7:02 AM but she reconsiders this moment feels something tugging at her this isnt right

she remembers her sister back at the circus— lydia. who she always loved dearly but clashed with, leading to her abandoning the circus and joining the rebellion.

retribution is deserved, but should it be served? what then makes us different from our oppressors?

or sth like that so she rescues kreutzer takes him back to the circus. and reunites with her sister after so many years after that ik not entirely sure what to do w the novel LOL bc i know there has to he a big battle bc the rebellion forces begin to quell opposition like how the communist regime in other countries started in ernest bc people felt oppressed but then they went too far and started culling the middle class so then kreutzer leads his own rebellion force against them to take back the country then once he wins he uses his kinghood to dissolve the monarchy and embrace democracy instead asking lydia to lead hes much too tired to lead, and she is much better suited for it but hm inhabe to think more about that entire segment after this he takes over lydias spot in the circus as its owner and organizer and with keith he spends the rest of his days helping people just like keith also they properly mourn alans death it takes forever for kreu to come to terms w his mothers assassination and crimes he probably never truly works it out but he begins to be able to recognize that she is both the tyrant queen and his loving mother that they do not cancel eachother out, that they are not mutually exclusive they are one in the same UGH IM SO UPSET I WISH ID FUCKING WRITE THIS BC I WANT TO FUCKING READ IT the message i wanna convey is like people.. are complex, imperfect, and the systems they create are also subjected to that but everyone does things for a reason. no matter what that reason is and i want lydia to address this too when she becomes the new prime minister of koel a democracy is not perfect, because man is not perfect. there will be hardship, mistakes made along the way. but together we can grow, improve, and learn about one another— and better our society for it. and i believe anywhere injustice goes, justice will always follow(edited) sth like that ig