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meta-sequoia · 2 months ago

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Rose genetics and the law of unintended consequences (or, ten rose bushes, reviewed)

I have a number of longposts in the backlog, including updates on a number of garden improvement projects I undertook over the winter, but I kept putting off posting them because there kept being Horrors. However, spring is here - in California anyway - and plants wait for no one.

Over the winter of 2025, as a coping mechanism for the aforementioned Horrors, I got really into roses. Because of who I am as a person, deciding what roses I wanted to buy also made me feel obliged to reconstruct the history of rose breeding, just to make sense of the teeming confusion of the tens of thousands of named rose varieties. Humans have been raising roses for food, medicine, and beauty for untold centuries, and so they've really grown up with us. The history of the development of roses, it turns out, is the history of the development of humanity in miniature.

This post has it all: history, some light phylogeny discussion, material analysis of English folk ballads, a conceptual framework for understanding how different kinds of roses vary and why, a #haul breakdown of what bare-root roses I got and what I thought of them, and some philosophical musings on what it means for an organism to be subjected to a long-term selective breeding process, to be remade wholly in the image of human desire. All that, and pictures of roses, under the cut.

My general region of California is considered to have a good climate for roses, much good may it do us. It never gets too hot or too cold, so they essentially never go out of season, and even though our winters are wet, the rest of the year is fairly dry. This is absolutely critical, because the main problem that makes garden roses hard to grow is fungal disease. Modern roses are incredibly susceptible to fungal diseases, which are caused, roughly, by Damp. This has typically been combated with toxic sprays (though there are now less-toxic options) and aggressive pruning regimens.

Needless to say, this is a ridiculous fucking problem for a plant to have. California natives, by comparison, hate irrigation - they have a natural life cycle involving being dry in summer and wet in winter, like California itself, so if you grow them in a climate resembling their natural range, without too much added water, they will be mostly OK. Roses, as far as I can tell, actually hate all water, including rain and humidity, which is much worse because gardeners do not control the weather. If it rains too often after, say, noon, the rose's leaves might get wet, fail to dry off, get a fungal disease, and die. If there is too much fog, or it is humid, as it is in most of the country in the summer, the rose's leaves might get wet &c. If you have a sprinkler system - you get the idea.

Fungal disease can also weaken roses and make them more prone to insect infestations. This is bad because modern garden roses are, without any help from The Weather, already incredibly prone to infestations from aphids, mites, beetles, and a mite-borne disease undescriptively called "rose rosette disease", which produces a habitus that I can only describe as "rose bush eldritch horror".

Now, this may all have you asking one question. Probably, that question is "why are you so obsessed with a plant that wants so badly to die?" I will not be answering this question today. Instead, I will be answering a different question, which is "Why do modern garden roses suck so bad?"

Now, if roses are subject to some manner of curse, then it isn't a family curse, phylogenically speaking. Roses - genus Rosa species extremely miscellaneous - are a member of the family Rosaceae, which contains a massive number of useful and delightful plants. It is possibly the most economically important family of plants next to the brassicas. The rose family brings us not just roses, but apples, strawberries, raspberries, blackberries, plums, peaches, apricots, and almonds. And the wild rose, untouched by human efforts, is a lot like a raspberry, actually.

Its flowers have only five petals, in pink or white. It’s got thorny stems that form thickets, and oval (or, technically, lanceolate) leaves with lightly serrated edges. Its flowers are fragrant, which is an adaptation to their long and necessary coexistence with pollinators and other insects - fragrance serves as a chemical signal for insects to "come here" or "go away", depending. The wild rose is hardy, like all wild plants, tolerant of various environmental problems that would kill a garden rose: shade, salt, normal levels of ambient insect and fungal disease pressure, drought, being consistently rained on in the afternoon or evening. It may reproduce asexually from suckers - strong shoots from near the base of the plant - and this makes it able to withstand browsing pressure from e.g. deer. (Put a pin in that.) It also can reproduce in the normal way, by having its flowers pollinated and forming seeds, which are borne in prominent reddish-orange fruits called "hips".

This is not a rose I bought, but here’s Rosa gymnocarpa, a California native rose. It’s a wood rose, so it’s shade-tolerant, and it’s often found in redwood forests specifically, so it tolerates relatively dry soil and very acidic soil.

Honorable mention: Rosa gymnocarpa (wood rose)

Source: Calscape

A raspberry plant in flower, for comparison. Source

The wild rose has another trait, which may be surprising to those who have only ever seen garden roses: it blooms once, usually in the summer. This is typical of flowers, which almost always have a season, for the exact same reason fresh fruit has a season. Flowering plants are on a tight schedule: they need to finish up their blooming, so they can set fruit, so they can get their seeds out before winter, in case the frost kills them off. And mostly we’re used to that: tulips are for spring, so you don't expect a tulip to make a second showing in fall, or to flower continuously throughout the summer. But roses have been bred to do this, and have done it for centuries, for so long we barely remember what it was like when "roses blooming" was a time of year, an event.

It's possible that for most of human history, roses were all the more treasured for being fleeting, which simply isn't an aspect of how we moderns understand roses. I am constantly subjected to traditional ballads at home, both in English and German, so I am very aware that multiple Child ballads mention roses as a way of placing the events of the ballad at a particular time of year. In 'Lady Isobel and the Elf-Knight', a song traditionally associated with May Day, one version of the chorus references the events as occurring 'as the rose is blown'. And at the start of 'Tam Lin', the protagonist meets her fairy lover while plucking a double rose, is "laid down among... the roses red" by him, and finishes the ballad on Halloween night heavily pregnant with his child. The course of the ballad is inextricably intertwined with the course of the seasons, and the bloom of roses is synonymous with early summer. (There's so much symbolism in 'Tam Lin', but especially around roses. Can I interest you in tam-lin.org at this time?)

European religious literature even uses "a rose e'er blooming" as a purely figurative phrase, something impossible and magical enough to be a metonym for the Virgin Mary - but in the modern era, most garden roses are ever-blooming. The perpetual-blooming rose is not the natural state of the rose plant, but a kind of technology that had to be developed. And I don't know, I just think that's neat.

So what have we learned? The wild rose is: once-blooming, tough, possibly shade-tolerant depending on species, very thorny, bearing simple pink or white five-petaled flowers, that are fragrant, pollinator-friendly, and produce fruit readily enough. In short, a practical, normal sort of plant.

The garden rose is…not that. There’s no other way to put this: the modern garden rose is the wild rose, but bimboified.

Now, in case today is your first day on the Internet - well, first of all, welcome, it’s bad here - but secondly, bimboification is a niche fetish where someone is transformed into a hypersexualized version of themselves that is also very stupid. Plant domestication is obviously analogous. I didn’t originate this joke; in fact, I reblogged a joke like this just last week.

Roses are like this but even more so. Like, wheat is clearly bimboified. Its sexual parts (seeds) have been remade, swollen to ludicrous proportions, and wheat is probably worse at being a plant than wild grasses. But we created modern wheat from wild grass because it was more useful that way, and wheat could in theory survive and spread without human cultivation. Roses are Like That purely because we wanted to make them a more perfect decorative object. Centuries of intensive selection pressure for appearance have rendered roses useless as an independent plant: they are so disease-prone they need extensive intervention to even survive, and they are often physically incapable of propagating themselves - one of the basic features of plants! - without human aid. That’s plant bimboification.

Source: Heirloom Roses. This one is called 'Oranges 'n' Lemons. Hardly seems like the same plant!

Here are just a few examples, of what we've done to roses. Humans love rose petals - eating them, distilling them into perfume, smelling them, just looking at them - so the garden rose has massive flowers that are so stuffed with petals that pollinators cannot get at their centers, rendering the rose incapable of reproducing except possibly with the help of a human equipped with a paintbrush. Humans love bright colors, so modern roses come in every color their natural pigments allow. Garden roses are often - though not always - less thorny than their wild cousins, because thorns are inconvenient to humans, and so have been somewhat bred out.

And what’s just as important is what was bred out of wild roses in the process of becoming modern roses - by accident. As mentioned above, modern roses are often useless to pollinators, and, not unrelatedly, can’t reproduce without human help. They often lose their fragrance, if not specifically bred for it. They are very susceptible to disease, because gardeners can keep alive, through sheer stubbornness, plants that natural selection would have culled. Likewise, they need full sun where many wild roses can get by even in the shade of big evergreens, and they can't tolerate nearly as much cold, heat, or salt exposure as their wild relatives.

This 'use it or lose it' thing, by the way, is a general principle of selective processes like plant breeding, or like evolution. If you have two independent traits, A and B, and you select hard for A, then B is likely to gradually drop out of the population, simply because the subset of A carriers that also have B is likely to be small. It's pure statistics. (It essentially is a human-created population bottleneck.) The more intense and ruthless the selection pressure, the stronger the effect. Evolution cares a lot about seed production and hardly at all about color, so wild roses are plain but make enormous rose hips; humans like beautiful roses the color of sunsets, and are indifferent to seed production, so modern roses don’t make hips at all. The failure to select for eventually becomes an implicit selection pressure against.

(Highly-bred organisms are thus less, I guess, well-rounded genetically even before you get to issues of inbreeding, and if you assume there is no biological link between your selected-for traits and other ridealong traits, e.g. domestication syndrome. Genetics is complicated!)

One adapted wild-type trait that - I speculate - was not bred out, due to its direct usefulness to humans, was the ability of roses to grow back vigorously from having leaves or branches removed. This is, it seems to me, an adaptation to herbivore browsing - if you are a rose with minimal regrowth ability, and a deer chews on half your canes, it’s curtains for you. But humans also fully remove half of the canes of their garden roses every winter - it’s critical to controlling the fungal disease that so plagues them. Specifically, pruning improves airflow through the plant, which evaporates the water that keeps falling on the leaves from the sky. (You know. The rain, that roses both hate and need to live.) In some sense, we are acting as caretakers here, shaping the plant in inscrutable ways for its own good. But to the plant, we are basically deer: just another in a long line of animals that want to steal its leaves. Unbelievable! It needs those! Fuck you too, buddy: here’s a faceful of thorns.

Truly, a tale as old as time.

This brings me to my first actual rose review, a kind of bridge between wild roses and the world of cultivated roses.

#1: Rosa rugosa, probably "Hansa"

Source: the author's yard.

This is a sucker - a vigorous young ground-level shoot - from an unnamed rosebush from my mother's house. I say "probably 'Hansa'" because we have no idea what this actually is, only that it is a rugosa hybrid, purchased from an unknown nursery in the Midwest sometime during the Bush administration.

'Hybrid rugosas' are crosses between garden-type roses and a wild rose species called Rosa rugosa, which is native to much of Asia. This particular rose bush has many traits carried over from its wild parent: it's violently fragrant, a glorious sweet-spicy combo that smells to me like childhood and home; it has wrinkly leaves (characteristic of Rosa rugosa in particular); its stems are practically coated in prickles; and it's quite tolerant of shade, drought, and salt (Rosa rugosa is a beach rose).

The main virtue evinced by this rose, derived from its wild parent, is the same reason that it is still here in my garden: it is extremely difficult to kill. My mother, after hearing me say I wanted this specific rose bush at my house the same way it had been at my childhood home, dug up a sucker from her instance, put it in a bag with some wet dirt, carried it by hand on a multi-hour cross-country plane flight, and handed it off to me. Once I received it, I stuck it in a pot, because I was ripping up my lawn and had nowhere to plant it, and mostly forgot about it, because I was busy ripping up my entire lawn. It lost its leaves suspiciously early in the fall. ("That's not good," my mother said, over FaceTime, brow furrowed. "Are the rest of your roses doing that?")

But as the saying doesn't go, "where there's green cambium, there's hope", and I continued to take care of it throughout the winter. I eventually even remembered to put it in the ground. It is now March, and in defiance of the mockery of certain judgemental housemates, who said things like "why do you have a stick in a pot?" and "it's giving 'dead', my guy", this "stick" has now decided to become a rosebush, and has a grand total of (approximately) twenty-five leaves.

Like I said: extremely difficult to kill. It is currently planted 10-ish feet from the base of a redwood tree, a tough environment where some hardy garden-style roses have nonetheless been known to thrive. Given that its resurrection has occurred entirely while it was planted under the redwood, it doesn't seem too mad about its environment.

Review: holy shit, it’s alive???

#2: Zéphirine Drouhin, the "old garden rose"

Source: Heirloom Roses

Rosarians have conceived of many groupings of garden roses, based on known ancestry, phenotype, genetic studies, and Vibes, but one major breakpoint is those bred before 1867, the "old garden roses", and after 1867, the "modern garden roses".

The old garden roses were derived mostly from ancient European and Middle Eastern stock, which had themselves been created from wild roses centuries prior. For example, this is Rosa x alba, an ancient European rose strain; it was used as the heraldic badge of the medieval House of York during the English conflict known as the War of the Roses.

Source: not mine

Some of these roses are perpetual-blooming, a trait introduced as late as the eighteenth century, and which is entirely due to trade contact with China: as far as I can tell, the genes for strong reblooming only come from the Chinese rose-breeding tradition, which was itself centuries old by that point. So the modern Western concept of perpetual-blooming roses as the default kind of rose - like so many other aspects of modernity - is a direct result of Europeans cribbing from everybody else.

Interestingly, France was a major center for rose development during the early modern period. You can see it in the way old garden roses are named: overwhelmingly after some eminent madame or monsieur. This is probably connected to the fact that Josephine, Napoleon Bonaparte’s empress, was a rose fiend: she had two hundred and fifty new varieties of rose to be brought to her gardens at Château de Malmaison, which was probably pretty much all the named varieties of rose that existed then, and many of which were new to European cultivation at that time. Again, this represented a massive inflow of rose genes that were previously restricted to other countries or continents entirely. Inextricably, these gardens also represent the proceeds of early modern global trade, and of empire: Napoleon, on campaign abroad, himself sent her hundreds of specimens of flowering plants, and the French navy confiscated plants and seeds from ships captured and sea and sent them to her.

Anyway, Zéphirine Drouhin, created at the end of the "old garden rose" period and named for some now-forgotten madame or mademoiselle, is highly fragrant - one of the few roses said to really perfume the air - with a vibrant but old-fashioned color palette. (Apricot and yellow roses were also characteristic of the Chinese rose gene pool, and so were significantly less common in old garden roses.) Zéphirine Drouhin is also thornless, a rare trait that we nonetheless see in some old-fashioned garden roses, and a few modern garden roses as well.

Old garden roses have a variable but generally good level of disease resistance. Zéphirine Drouhin in particular, gets something of a bad rap for poor disease resistance; English rose breeder David Austin Roses says, tactfully, that it "prefers warmer climates" (versus, one must assume, rainy England) and that "controlling disease can be a problem". By this you should understand them to mean that it is a whiny little pissbaby that constantly gets blackspot, a diva that will defoliate at the drop of a hat (or the drop of, uh, water).

However, unlike certain other newer roses I will mention later, I have found Zéphirine Drouhin to be pretty healthy so far. I received this rose, like many in this post, "bare root", basically a stick, dormant in a bag of wood shavings. Upon being planted in a part-sun area, it has leafed out with only a scattering of aphids to show in terms of disease.

Review: So far, so good. Looking forward to the fragrance.

#3 and 4: 'Mister Lincoln' and 'Fragrant Cloud', the hybrid tea brothers

Remember how I mentioned that 1868 is the breakpoint between "old garden roses" and "modern garden roses"? That year marked the invention of a new type of rose, the 'hybrid tea', that is in some sense THE rose, the ARCHETYPE of a rose. If you ask someone who knows nothing about roses to draw 'a rose' - if you look up clipart of a rose - a hybrid tea rose is what you'll get.

Source: Star Nursery

This is Mister Lincoln, and although it was developed as late as the 1960s, it has the classic hybrid tea rose form. Hybrid teas have a very distinctive shape, described as "high-pointed", with a spiral of unfurling petals that curl at the edges, and they're borne singly on long stems, making them great for cutting and putting into vases and bouquets. They are not always strongly fragrant, and they are not generally very disease-resistant. They come in a very wide variety of colors, intense and subtle. They are reblooming.

Hybrid teas were developed by another East-meets-West cross, when the Chinese tea roses, freshly imported from Guangzhou in the early 19th century, were bred with the old garden roses. Tea roses have the same iconic form as the hybrid teas; they have those unique, pastel shades that were previously quite absent from European rose stocks; they smell like a fresh cup of tea. All these traits they impart to hybrid teas. Hybrid teas have been very popular ever since, and have been subject to a great deal of selective breeding for color and form.

Hybrid teas don't generally spark joy, to me. I find the 'cartoon rose' shape kind of twee, honestly. And the reputation for lack of disease tolerance puts me off. But I heard Mister Lincoln was incredibly fragrant, and that drew me in. Likewise Fragrant Cloud (1967), which also has the charming feature of being a violent neon coral that is allegedly very difficult to photograph.

Source: Heirloom Roses

“It'll be fine," I thought. "How much fungal disease can it get? It's not like it's humid here."

Never again. My trust is destroyed; fuck hybrid teas.

please, my son, he is very sick

This is my poor Mister Lincoln, planted from bare-root in mid-December. It has three different fungal diseases, and also an aphid infestation I can't seem to get it to shake. It looks like one of those diagrams of a liver in a medical textbook that has fatty liver and cirrhosis and liver cancer all at once, just so you can see what all the diseases look like. This is a rose that has every problem! No other rose in this flower bed comes close to having every problem! 'Munstead Wood' is also a modern garden rose (though from a very different lineage - see my review below) and it has no fungal diseases and not a single aphid!

Well, maybe the other hybrid tea I bought is doing better... well, nope, it rained last week and Fragrant Cloud has powdery mildew.

Review: Come on, man.

#5 Unidentified ‘sunset’ rose

I didn’t buy these roses; they came with my house. As a consequence, I have no idea what they are, but I am now intimately familiar with their traits, and I think they are very indicative of both the high and low points of modern garden roses.

On the surface level, the fact that these rose bushes are still with us is an impressive proof of their persistence under adversity. When I bought the house, these roses were being choked to death. Lily-of-the-nile had been planted way too close to them, and then permitted to grow unchecked and undivided for many years; their roots were completely infiltrated and surrounded with lily roots. The lily roots had also damaged the irrigation lines, which were dribbling uncontrolled amounts of water into the shared root zone. So when I excavated these roses, the whole area smelled strongly of rot, with visible mold throughout; the roots were fully wet even in the heat of August. The roses were also infested with blackspot, not surprisingly. I wasn’t sure if what I was doing was too little, too late.

But when they finally got some drainage, some direct sunlight, and some relief from the brutal root competition, they did start growing back, and even blooming. Come winter, I pruned hard, defoliated, and applied neem oil consistently. And they’ve made a comeback!

Source: these blooms are actually my roses.

They bloom, and they’re beautiful. They do this ombre thing, where the buds are bright yellow and as they open they go from yellow, to orange, and finally to red.

The growth is fairly vigorous, with no powdery mildew no matter how rainy it gets. But their foliage definitely suffers from blackspot, and occasional rose rust; the spores are probably ambiently present in the soil now, and they can’t quite seem to defend themselves, even with ample help from organic fungicides like neem oil.

They also have no fragrance. They smell like nothing. And that’s the standard modern garden rose in a nutshell, I think: beautiful color and form, shaky disease resistance, little fragrance. It’s a little sad, honestly.

Review: Okay, this one is really pretty, actually.

Interlude: Pesticides and the law of unintended consequences

So, yeah, you can sort of see how roses got a reputation for being picky divas. I can only imagine how bad this sort of thing must get in places that get (gasp!) rain or humidity in the summer.

Now, having created plants that are too disease-ridden to live, rose-lovers came up with practical and effective solutions to the disease problem they created. For the past century or so, the go-to fix for our increasingly disease-prone rose population has been chemicals: regular applications of synthetic insecticide and fungicide sprays, as well as plenty of fertilizer and herbicide to feed the roses and kill any competing weeds.

However, recall the theme of this post: the law of unintended consequences. In agriculture, the development of modern pesticides and fertilizers has been genuinely miraculous; the Green Revolution is estimated to have saved a billion people from starvation in the latter half of the twentieth century. Saving a billion people! Can you even begin to conceive of what it would be like to save a billion people, even grapple with the moral weight of that act? I know I can't; the number is simply too large for our moral intuitions to handle, I think. So I'm hesitant to bad-mouth pesticides and fertilizers too much.

But they do have massive downsides. Chemical fertilizers leach into the groundwater and cause algal blooms that make entire bodies of water go anoxic, rendering them uninhabitable to fish and the rest of the aquatic food chain. Insecticides are probably responsible for colony collapse, which endangers the pollinators that we rely on for our food supply.

And, well, even if you don't give a shit about the natural world - you are a part of the natural world. You are an animal, with all the frailty that implies. Our bodies use many of the same ancient metabolic pathways as insects and plants; the majority of your DNA is shared with a banana. And because you are an animal, it is very difficult indeed to create an insecticide that will poison other animals without poisoning you too, at least a little. Herbicides are somehow still worse, despite the more distant biological relationship between humans and dandelions: Roundup, for instance, is linked to non-Hodgkin's lymphoma, which has led to Monsanto paying out massive legal settlements to cancer patients who used their products.

So if we can't grow roses without coating them in poison, maybe we should just… not do that? Go back to growing super-hardy nearly-wild roses like rugosas, forgoing forever the elegance and sublime color of a modern rose?

Give up this? ‘Glowing Peace’, Heirloom Roses

Not so fast! Maybe this technological problem has a technological solution. If we bred roses so that they sucked, maybe we should just not do that! Make different roses! Make roses that don't suck!

#6-#8, ��Ebb Tide', 'Eden', and 'Lavender Crush': roses that don't suck

Over the last fifty years, people have become increasingly aware of the impacts of modern lifestyles upon our health and the health of the planet and its ecosystems. So maybe this has made the public less willing to buy roses that need to be treated constantly with toxic sprays. Or maybe it's just that growing disease-prone roses is an enormous pain in the ass. Spray, prune, spray, defoliate, fertilize, spray, fertilize, spray, water - but not too much! Oops, powdery mildew. Defoliate and spray some more.

So the genetic health of the newer varieties of garden roses is greatly improved. The two hybrid teas I struggled with above were bred in the 1960s. All the named rose varieties in this section were bred since the 1990s or later: Eden in 1997, Ebb Tide in 2004, and Lavender Crush, the baby of the group, was introduced in 2016. All of them are vibrantly healthy and quite vigorous; Ebb Tide and Eden are shade-tolerant too, and Lavender Crush is allegedly very winter-hardy. After a scant two months in the ground, they've started to put out flower buds. And they keep some of the glorious color and form of older roses. Look at them!

Source: Heirloom Roses.

I don't mean to say all 20th century roses are bad and disease-ridden. I also have purchased 'New Dawn' (introduced 1930), due to it being the fifteen-dollarest rose at the Home Depot. (My toxic trait is that I am an absolute sucker for a good deal. I don't go into TJ Maxx anymore; it's too dangerous.) 'New Dawn' has all the ancestral, throwback traits I laud here: shade-tolerance, fragrance, disease resistance. It even brings in the pollinators! But it seems to me there's been a noticeable uptick in the quality of newer rose introductions, particularly when it comes to disease resistance. I'm not wired into the professional rose world to know what that is; I'm Literally Just Some Guy. But it's a good trend.

Review: I am so excited for the buds to open, you have no idea.

#9: 'Double Knockout': the 'landscape' rose

Wait, no, I take that back. These roses have too much ease of care. Put some back.

The Knockout rose has one virtue: you cannot kill it with an axe. Literally.

This rose was planted right at the foot of a redwood tree in my garden, because the previous owner of my house was an idiot. This is a terrifically bad setup for roses and redwoods: redwoods acidify the soil, and suck up water and nutrients aggressively, leaving little for surrounding plants, and of course they provide dense shade. Roses hate the acid, the dry and low-nutrient soil, and the shade; this plant never bloomed all last summer. For their part, the redwoods hate having anything planted in their inner root zone - their roots are relatively shallow for such a large tree. This is not a good situation for anyone, so I hacked this rose back to the ground, dug out as much of the root ball as I dared, and in my naivete thought that would be the end of it. Well, it has grown back. Now I am faced with the dilemma of whether to risk root injury to my redwood tree, or just let the rose be, bloomless as it is. Probably the latter is better for the redwood tree, on the whole. Maybe it’ll get choked out if I don’t water it? Anyone’s guess, really.

The category of landscape roses is a 2000s invention. The first Knockout rose was introduced in 2000 after years of intensive selective breeding for being easy-care, free-flowering, and disease-resistant; the similar Drift line was the product of an amateur rose breeder in 2006 to much the same ends. Landscape roses are so named because instead of being demanding prima donnas suited only to those who love roses enough to take on the Rose Tasks, they’re just another pretty shrub in the landscape.

And I will say this for them: in that bad, fungal spore–inundated flower bed I mentioned, my landscape roses (plus Munstead Wood, see below) are notably free of fungal disease.

Also, I think that's leaf tissue proliferating at the center of the bottom left bloom?? A rare but harmless growth disorder of flowering plants.

This comes at a cost, of course, at least if you’re a snob like me. I don’t think landscape roses are very interesting-looking - though of course they come in a wide variety of colors, the better to coordinate with the color scheme of your house! - and they are generally, tragically, without fragrance. While I can’t complain about anything that gets US gardeners to use less pesticides, they are barely roses to me. They are, in fact, the closest roses come to being an inanimate object, a decorative thing you can just plonk down in your garden wherever, like a tacky concrete statue. They’re a commodity; the enchantment is gone. I wouldn’t rip them out where they’re well-sited, but I sure wouldn’t plant more.

Now, this is incredibly mean to people who love landscape roses, but here goes. I’m reminded of a thread from r/Ceanothus, the California native gardening subreddit, that is now burned into my brain. OP asks for a native shrub recommendation, but not just any native shrub. OP wants a native shrub that will grow very tall, but also stay very narrow - 1’ wide in places. OP needs a native shrub that will grow thick and vigorous, to block out their view of the neighbors. OP needs this thing to be evergreen; OP presumably wants low water inputs. And OP needs all this, in a shrub that will grow in full shade.

In fairness, OP was polite about it, and this is a common problem for urban gardeners. The dark, untended canyon between buildings is a very common phenomenon in Californian cities. I too have a narrow, shaded side yard containing a tiny strip of crappy, gravelly dirt, that I’d love to grow something in: how do you think I found this post? Dear reader, I am very much at that devil's sacrament.

And the ceanothusheads of r/Ceanothus tried gamely. But one commenter replied with something that fully changed how I think about gardening:

Source: Reddit

Sometimes, what you need is not a living organism, with its own needs, that will change over time in ways you may not endorse, that interacts with the world around it. Sometimes what you really want is a man-made object. Sometimes what you want to grow in your tall, narrow, lightless, bone-dry side yard, for your privacy requirements, is a fence. And that’s what I think about landscape roses. In Mediterranean and desert climates, as long as there's enough sun, you can always fall back on planting a succulent. But not every location can grow succulents outdoors year-round. In temperate climates, landscape roses could probably be successfully replaced with a particularly attractive boulder. Or, if what you want is a smart-looking, easy-care hedge: consider a fence.

Review: I’d maybe rather plant a fence a succulent.

#10: 'Munstead Wood': the old English rose, reloaded

‘Munstead Wood’, my final acquisition, is a credit to another major modern rose breeding program, this time out of England: David Austin Roses. The main idea of the David Austin rose-breeding project seems to be combining the particular charms of traditional English old garden roses - their fragrance, their romantic, sophisticated forms - with the virtues of modern roses - continuous blooming, a wide range of highly Instagrammable colors - plus disease-tolerance that twenty-first century gardeners now expect. And judging by their singular impact on the contemporary rose market, they seem to have been very successful at that goal. The Reddit reviews are glowing, the forums are abuzz for their hottest new releases (Dannahue restock wen?), their most popular roses are often sold out, and other rose sellers have catalog filters for 'English shrub roses' that allegedly share the looks and fragrance of David Austin's best.

From the author's camera roll. 'I can't believe it's not Dave [sic] Austin!'

Their marketing is also very slick. Their website is very informative, with separate filters for various kinds of roses you might want to buy ('Best for fragrance', 'For a shady spot', 'Thornless or nearly so'), all the rose varieties have literary or historical names or else are named after charming British locations, and are all beautifully photographed in their idyllic show garden, and the prose is carefully engineered to incite lust in the winter-weary gardener. They even do periodic drops of new roses, like a sneaker company.

So last November, I allowed myself to buy one David Austin rose, 'Munstead Wood'.

Source: David Austin Roses

'Munstead Wood' is really gorgeous, I think, blooming in a deep burgundy color. The website claims the fragrance is "Old Rose, with fruity notes of blackberry, blueberry and damson".

An interesting fact about 'Munstead Wood' is that it is actually region-locked. David Austin Roses sells roses in both the US and UK (and maybe other places; sorry I am so American), but the climate of the UK has been changing, with more extreme weather events and even more rain. And you know how it is with roses and the rain. 'Munstead Wood' was no longer able to thrive, and has packed up its little rucksack and gone out to explore the world as a lone vagabond - specifically, America.

So how is it doing here? Great, actually. It may have been rained on every day for the past week, but at least it's not in England, I guess.

'Munstead Wood' has no fungal disease. It looks like it's never even heard of fungal disease. I'm pretty impressed! I can't actually tell you whether the roses are good, but this is a pretty good plant, which is a good start.

Review: I'm holding myself back from buying more David Austin roses right now. God help me, I have two more open full- to part-sun spots in my garden right now.

David Austin, "Lady of Shalott". Call me the Lady of Shalott the way I'm languishing in my tower, gazing only at the mere reflections of the real world (stuck inside, looking at my phone, because of the rain) and am about to throw myself in the river with longing (to be out in the garden)

#this was mostly written like a week and a half ago #delighted to report it has now stopped raining :)#gardening #plantblr #roses #botany #...kind of. not a botanist i just like reading about it #longpost #original content #(i hesitate to call this an 'effortpost': aside from spending an hour on wikipedia trying to graph out the various old garden roses #and their relationships with the species roses that spawned them - it just kind of happened.)

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lavender-butterfly-cookie · 6 months ago

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I would love to see a second part of Forgotten Friends

One where the beast eventually realized that they blew stuff out of proportion and, because of that, their friend was basically forced to betray them, but they have no one to blame but themselves

And by the time they realized and are out of their prison

Reader cookie can varely remember them, they do remember they used to be friends, but all their evil deed have replaces most happy memories and Reader has a hard time being able to trust or even be near them

Patience is a strong thing, but time is more

The SoulJam of Patience has follow their tittle, now it's Their turn to use it

I like your style dear butterfly.

Forsaken, Forgotten, Un-Forgiven

previous part

Where does one even begin to express how much patience you've lost? How does one even begin to accept your friends have become nothing more but shells of their former selves? How does one learn to forgive them for forcing you to betray them? As hard as it is to believe, it starts with an apology.

After sealing your friends away all those years ago, it took you immense amounts of patience before you could face the world again. It took you so much patience to adjust and make new friends. So much patience to finally feel free about revealing who you really are. Patience to accept that they were gone and they weren't coming back. It took a long time, but you endured it. And it was worth it.

But it wasn't.

You found yourself face to face with five shards of tinted glass, all representing a shard from what was broken long ago. You barely remembered any of them, but that doesn't mean you forgot them and their evil deeds completely

The blue shard, who had once been your source of knowledge and guidance, now full of cracks that mimicked the web of deceit it was entangled in. You remember how the threads of that web were used to puppet and control the lives of the innocent, forcing them to fight for his own twisted little show.

The white shard, who had one been the holder of the virtue known as volition, now flavorless and apathetic soul devoid of any meaning. You remember how easily she turned everything to flour with just a simple motion of her hand. And you knew she did it because she saw little to no value in living a life with the inevitable end known as death

The red shard, who was once the herald of change in itself, now a destructive and merciless monster who sees no point in creation when it's bout to wither away eventually. You remember how he had destroyed countless homes and lives, all because he was bored.

The pink shard, who was once the most loving and joyful person you had ever met, now a lazy sloth who didn't even bother doing anything anymore. You remember vividly how she wiped away so many cookies just because they woke her up from her nap.

Then there was the Purple shard, once a noble knight of solitude, now a dark knight of silence. You remember all to well how had mercilessly crumbled several cookies in a single strike. How he's never uttered a word since he became corrupted.

These shards of glass are none other than your fallen friends, freed from but under different circumstances. They weren't causing havoc, they weren't attacking- heck, they weren't even angry at you after you lead them into a trap. What baffled you more was how the ancients were present but stood to the side. It took some time before the realization hit you.

"They want to talk."

You heard a voice say. It sounded like you, but much more mature. You felt your heart drop. They wish to talk? Couldn't they have thought about that years- no, CENTURIES ago?! But you're not about to argue with the light of patience when you clearly have better things to focus on.

The first thing you noticed about your fallen friends is their demeanor. They're not angry... they actually look guilty and nervous. Next was their souljams... which they didn't have for some reason. The ancients probably have it, which is good. They can't cause much damage. Shadow milk cookie stepped forward and you were ready for anything....

"Y/N cookie..."

Anything at all.

"We're sorry..."

Except that. Your eyes widened and you froze solid, the words unable to register in your head. They were apologizing?... But- no that can't be right... this is a trick... It's a trick and you won't fall for it again... You look at the ancients. They aren't intervening or protesting against this false apology.

...

They can't seriously believe this, right? They're not falling for this, RIGHT?! You step back a bit and shake your head slightly. This was a trick. Why do they want to redeem themselves NOW? Had they not realized the gravity of what they did before sooner? This had to be some kind of lie. And you weren't gonna fall for it. You made that very clear to them before walking.

It was only later on where pure vanilla cookie explained that they were attempting a redemption arc to fix the bond between you. The ancients really did believe them... Why did they believe them?! They had been nothing but pure evil as far as you can remember. Their evil deeds outweighed whatever happy memories you had with them... almost as though you didn't have happy memories.

The beasts tried again and again to at least get you to cast a glance at them but it was fruitless. You walked away from the library when Shadow milk cookie tried talking to you. You completely ignored Eternal sugar cookie trying to enter your room and talk to you. You turned your back on Burning spice cookie when he attempted reaching out for you. You refused to acknowledge Mystic flour cookies attempt of interaction with you. And the silence between You and Silent salt cookie had grown into a deadly kind of quiet, as if none of you had even been together.

They just didn't get it, did they? They betrayed your trust once, what if they do it again? You had to be BEYOND patient with yourself in order to recover and yet they've returned? No, they shouldn't have. They had no idea how many sleepless nights you endured to finally accept they're absence. How much you had to learn to adjust and be patient with yourself to be able to move on. And all that hard work, all that patience, it was gonna crumble because of them.

No, you can't let that happen. You can't just forgive them just like that. Not after everything they've done, to innocent cookies, everything they've done to you. If they really wanted your forgiveness, they'd have to be as patient with you as you were with them when they weren't corrupted. They have to earn your forgiveness, and that was going to take a long time.

You were patient with them, now they must be patient with you. How long they'd have to be patient was unknown, and how long they'd actually remain patient was just as mysterious.

#crk #cookie run kingdom #crk x reader #cr kingdom #Beast cookies #Ancient cookies #Pure Vanilla cookie #Dark Cacao cookie #Golden cheese cookie #Hollyberry cookie #White lily cookie #Silent salt cookie #Eternal sugar cookie #Burning spice cookie #Mystic flour cookie #Shadow milk cookie

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suzukiblu · 1 year ago

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If you feel up for it, for the writing meme prompt, Clark Kent/Lex Luthor, with the song You And Me by Lifehouse? If it's not your thing I totally get it though and hope you have a great time and fun writing the things that do catch your fancy!

I think we ALL knew that I was gonna do baby Kon for this, lbr. Also ngl, this came out way more cracky than the prompt would suggest it should've but it is absolutely my favorite thing I’ve written for this meme so far, as the necessity for the following cut should help attest, haha.

Unfortunately, Lex takes one look at Cadmus’s progress report on the newly-crafted Experiment Thirteen and realizes he has paternal instincts.

Well, that’s inconvenient. And a little disgusting, honestly. Certainly a disappointment.

He supposes it could be worse. He could be Lionel about this.

Anyway, that’s how he has a physiological four year-old on his lap when he hears the news about Superman coming back to life and fistfighting an evil cyborg with his own face about it, because of course the man didn’t have the decency to just stay dead. Why would he, after all?

Lex needs a drink. That would be a bad example for the physiological four year-old, though.

Then again, Experiment Thirteen should be completely immune to the effects of Earth-based alcohol in about another four to six months of consistent yellow sun exposure, so . . .

Lex is halfway through his second brandy when Superman shows up on his balcony at super-speed wearing a very pretentiously dramatic black suit and looking both winded and bewildered. And still alive, unfortunately.

“Don’t you have a murderous cyborg to be ensuring is in custody?” Lex asks dryly, deciding to just not acknowledge the presence of the physiological four year-old who’s moved on to messily but methodically coloring on the floor underneath his desk. Lex didn’t actually give Experiment Thirteen either a coloring book or crayons, mind, but he appreciates the clone’s resourcefulness in breaking into the office supplies. Anyway, it’s useful for developing its hand-eye coordination and fine motor control.

Superman’s pupils are pin-pricks, barely even there at all. Which is an unusual reaction from him, and Lex notes that fact reflexively but doesn’t particularly care about it. Meant-to-be-dead people do unusual things, especially the alien ones. And it isn’t as if–

“Baby,” Superman blurts, his eyes wide.

Lex . . . pauses. Takes a slow sip of his brandy.

Alright then.

“Yes, I’ve noticed,” he settles on eventually, raising an eyebrow at him. Experiment Thirteen peers out from under the desk, immediately decides Superman isn’t an interesting presence, and then goes back to coloring all over Lex’s floor. It seems to be drawing either a puppy or a chain of complex genetic sequencing, but judging by the kinds of things it’s been drawing so far, it’s fifty-fifty. Lex has been getting the impression the clone actually likes art, which is a baffling interest to find in his own progeny, but how does that quote go . . . “I am a warrior, so that my son may be a merchant, so that his son may be a poet”?

Or something like that, anyway.

“No, I–baby,” Superman stresses, looking bewildered as he floats down a little closer to the open balcony door.

“. . . yes, I’ve noticed,” Lex repeats, raising his eyebrow again and taking another sip of brandy. Superman looks frazzled, bobbing up a little higher in the air again to get a better view of Experiment Thirteen under the desk. Experiment Thirteen keeps ignoring him in favor of its coloring, displaying no apparent interest in the most powerful uninvited guest in the history of illegal immigration. Lex experiences a moment of overwhelming paternal pride, which is such a bizarre and unanticipated experience that he doesn’t even know what to do with it.

“Where’d he come from?” Superman asks with a wondering expression. Ugh.

“A cloning lab,” Lex replies dismissively, setting his near-empty glass down on the desk. It’s hardly worth lying about Experiment Thirteen’s origins at this point. He didn’t want to murder everyone in Cadmus to keep the secret. He might need them if there’s an issue with Experiment Thirteen’s genetics later, after all. “We mixed it up a couple weeks ago while you were off wasting everyone’s time being dead."

“You had my baby?” Superman says, tilting in the air and still staring at Experiment Thirteen, as if he's somehow forgotten both how much kryptonite Lex owns and how much kryptonite he keeps specifically in this office. “While I was dead. You had my baby while I was dead.”

. . . alright then, Lex thinks again, both eyebrows raising this time.

“I really wouldn’t put it that way, personally,” he says. “Also, I don’t recall saying it was in any way yours.”

“Baby,” Superman repeats inanely, then lands on the floor and ducks down into a crouch to peer under the desk better, his pupils still reduced to barely-there pinpricks. Lex is so mystified he doesn't even activate the security system or the weaponized red sun lamps. Experiment Thirteen frowns at Superman–Lex, again, basks in unanticipated paternal pride–and then turns its back on him and hides all its drawings from him as seriously and carefully as if they were under NDA.

It's almost adorable, frankly.

Not that Lex finds things adorable, of course.

“His heartbeat's so cute,” Superman says, looking absolutely fascinated. Which is surprisingly useful of him to mention, actually, since Lex had previously been vaguely concerned that Experiment Thirteen's odd thrumming heartbeat might be a sign of a heart defect, but apparently it’s just a Kryptonian thing. A . . . “cute” Kryptonian thing, according to Superman.

Lex is increasingly mystified by this interaction.

“Can’t say I’ve spent much time listening to it, personally,” he lies, because he has in fact obsessed over that heartbeat’s health and stability since first finding out about its unusualness and has done a truly aggravating amount of research into heart murmurs and conditions and the like. But that’s hardly Superman’s business, now is it.

“. . . what’s his name?” Superman asks hesitantly. Lex is possibly having an out of body experience.

“Experiment Thirteen,” he says. Superman immediately looks offended.

“We need to give him a name, Lex,” he says. Lex, again, has an out of body experience.

“‘We’?” he repeats incredulously. “I made it, I get to decide what it’s called.”

“He’s got my DNA!” Superman protests, looking indignant. Lex has absolutely no idea how to process that expression.

“It has both our DNA, in fact, yours was too irritating to stabilize alone,” Lex informs him dubiously. More accurately it was literally impossible to stabilize alone, but he’s not mentioning that to Superman. “So it has my DNA, and I made it. And also put eight point two billion dollars into its production, as a lowball estimate. Therefore I’m the one who decides what its name is, thank you very much.”

“Lex,” Superman says disapprovingly. “You can’t call a baby Experiment Thirteen.”

“It’s physiologically developed enough to complain if it doesn’t like it,” Lex retorts, narrowing his eyes at him. Superman frowns at him. Lex has never had a more ridiculous conversation with the man, including all the times Superman’s tried to appeal to his nonexistent “better nature”. “Well it is.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Superman says, then ducks back down and peers at Experiment Thirteen again, gentling his voice to address it while Lex is still incredulously mouthing “ridiculous”? to himself. “Would you like a real name, kiddo?”

Experiment Thirteen sticks its tongue out at him.

Lex is finding parenthood to be a very rewarding experience, actually.

#clex #lex luthor #clark kent #kon el #conner kent #superman #superboy #superfamily #rinfic #anonymous

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aurumalatus · 10 months ago

Text

𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 [𝟏]

pairing. albedo x reader, xiao x reader, thoma x reader

word count. 1.9k

genre/warnings. prompt-based drabbles, royal!au, college!au, just some nice romance hehe

𝟏. 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐚𝐭 𝟏𝐚𝐦

“Your Highness, it’s rare to see you awake at this hour.”

Albedo bows hurriedly when you swing the heavy wooden door open, and you wave a dismissive hand; you’d told him to stop bowing to you years ago, and he still couldn’t cut the habit. Archons know it’ll be longer before he can stop calling you by a royal title.

“I had some trouble sleeping. I hope you don’t mind if I accompany you for a bit, Albedo.”

He shakes his head, gesturing to the spread of notebooks, test tubes, and various gadgets on the table, as if any of it would mean something to you. “I was just doing a bit of light experimentation. Nothing dangerous, so you’re welcome to stay.”

You pull up a stool at his side, one that he’d placed there specifically for your presence—it’s rare that anyone else visits him down here, after all. Since you were a child, you’d always had a fascination with this room, the royal lab, and it happened to be the place Albedo usually inhabited as the former royal alchemist’s pupil. You’d become fast friends.

The silence is comfortable for a few minutes. Albedo tinkers with a few things, takes some notes, and you simply watch. Crickets chirp outside the darkened windows. It’s how it’s always been.

Your eyes fall on a small burn mark on the wall that’s clumsily covered in paint. “Do you remember when we made that?” you ask, pointing out the blemish. Albedo looks up in surprise; you’re usually not one to converse when you keep him company. “I thought mixing a few chemicals couldn’t go too wrong. That was quite a mess to clean up.”

It was a common pattern when you were younger—you would make the mess, and Albedo would fix it. He was always smarter and a bit more mature than you, and as you grew up together, it remained that way.

“You were quite the troublemaker,” he says, a nostalgic smile tugging at his lips, “I was shocked that someone so hot-headed could ever hope to lead the kingdom.”

“What do you think of me, Albedo?”

It’s so abrupt that the question catches him off guard, hand slipping and drawing an ugly line through his notes. He struggles to control his breath. What does he think of you? It’s surely not his place to tell the truth in that regard; he’s lucky your parents had even allowed the two of you to be friends, much less what he actually wants. He gulps down the lump in his throat, trying to appear unfazed.

“If you’re asking me as a royal, then I would say that it’s been an honor to serve as an alchemist under your name. I look forward to doing more work to advance this kingdom, and I know you have a bright future as our ruler.”

A completely textbook answer.

He looks away too fast to be natural, hands already busying themselves with something else to prevent himself from saying too much. It seems you’ve hit a nerve, but that was also your intention all along.

Rising from your seat, you approach his side hesitantly, sliding your fingers over the pile of notebooks on the table—endless knowledge, most of which you likely wouldn’t understand. Albedo has always been a culmination of things you don’t understand, but you want to.

The truth is, you can’t imagine yourself loving anyone except him.

“And if I wasn’t asking as a royal?” He flinches, clearly not expecting you to continue this line of questioning. “If I asked you as me and me alone, how would you answer?”

Albedo turns to you, then, eyes dimming in the low light of the lab. He looks vulnerable, though he fights to keep his expression even. His voice is barely audible, a breathless whisper for your ears alone.

“If you were asking me as you and you alone,” he repeats, inhaling deeply for courage, “I’d say I’ve learned that sometimes, the discovery only leads to more questions.”

His gaze flickers down to your lips for a moment, then shoots back up to your eyes. The room suddenly feels much warmer than before. “And there are many more things I’d like to find out about you, if you’d allow me.”

𝟐. 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐡

You don’t know how you ended up this way. Well, you do, but you aren’t sure why it ended up this way.

College parties, as far as you’re aware, are supposed to be red solo cups and loud music, waking up the next day with hangovers and 8am classes. They’d been right about the red solo cups, but having one in Xiangling’s hands meant trouble.

“Let’s play Seven Minutes in Heaven,” she had slurred, a lazy smile on her lips as she stumbled around the room. You groaned as you caught her by the arm, just before she crashed into the vase in the corner.

“Xiangling, we’re in college, not high school. And I don’t think you’re in any condition to be doing anything except sleeping.”

Of course, there was no saying no to Xiangling about anything, which is how you ended up stuffed in a closet with Xiao.

It’s painfully awkward at first, dead silence with your limbs tangled together in the small space. He doesn’t say anything, and neither do you, out of fear of saying something stupid.

The truth is, you’ve had a crush on Xiao for a very long time now. It had started when he tutored you in your freshman year chemistry class, and since you had a mutual friend group, you began to see him a lot more often. He was kinder than he let on, albeit a bit rough around the edges, but you liked that about him—at least, you thought you did.

Sometime a few months ago, something had changed. He stopped entertaining your conversations, stopped answering your texts, just stopped. You’d been struggling to move on since then, since it was painfully obvious that your feelings were not returned.

“Are you drunk?” you ask shyly, just trying to fill the silence. He chuckles humorlessly.

“Not even a little. I wish I was, maybe I could get the image of Zhongli dancing out of my head.”

You laugh in response, slowly tapering off when he says nothing. It makes you feel a bit guilty that he got stuck in here with you.

“Xiao, listen, I’m sorry that it was my name you picked,” you say, leaning forward a bit, “I just—”

“Just don’t move,” he hisses through his teeth, jaw grinding with impatience. You frown in the darkness.

“Listen, if you didn’t want to do this, you didn’t have to play the stupid game. I think we’re all old enough that we can speak for ourselves—”

“That’s not it.”

“Wow, it’d be really cool if you’d let me finish my sente—”

“I just didn’t want you doing this with anyone else. I think I’d rather die than see someone like Childe disappear into this stupid closet with you.”

“I just think it’s a little ru—wait, what?”

Xiao sighs, seemingly a bit frustrated with himself. He understands that you’re unhappy with him, but he can’t find the words to say. Coming to terms with his feelings for you had been difficult, and since then, he’s been avoiding admitting to them. After all, what could someone like you see in someone like him?

“I’m sorry,” he says to start. That’s the one thing he’s sure about. “I know I’ve been rude lately. That’s my fault.”

“Well, yeah,” you grumble, and he fights the urge to roll his eyes, but continues anyway.

“I know everything I’ve done says otherwise, but…I like you. I have for a while, maybe since I met you.” He grits his teeth, feeling totally uncomfortable and out of his element. Some things are necessary though, he reasons, and you’re definitely worth it. “So I’m sorry for being an ass. Please don’t hate me. If you hate me, then just tell me, because then I’ll—”

The sound of Xiangling’s voice echoes from outside. “Ten seconds left, lovebirds!”

Xiao sighs. He’s out of time.

There’s a lot of things he could say, should say, but he settles for this:

“If you hate me, then just tell me,” he repeats, searching for your eyes in the darkness. He finds them for a moment, wide and soft. “Because then I’ll do everything I can to make it up to you.”

The door swings open.

𝟑. 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐞𝐭𝐥𝐲

Thoma takes a deep breath as he waits on the busy street, the townspeople chattering in excitement about the upcoming festival. The Commission had done endless work to organize this, he knows, and that should be an object of his anxiety as well, but all he can think about is you.

Being a fixer, he’s never been a stranger to social interaction. He probably speaks to hundreds of people, and it’s all in a day’s work. Of course, hundreds of people don’t make his heart race and palms sweat whenever he sees them, that’s a feature unique only to you.

Even asking you to accompany him to the festival had been quite an ordeal. Ayaka commented that she had never seen him so shaken in her life, and she was probably right; he’d rehearsed the conversation by himself for days. You’d accepted without complaint, kind as you are, but now comes the real issue: actually going to the festival with you.

Still, you look so excited when you wave to him from the end of the street that he can’t help but smile as well. His nervousness dissipates as soon as you’re right in front of him—you’re too bright to focus on anything else.

“Where to first? I hope you have a good tour for me,” you say teasingly, taking him by the arm. He chuckles.

“Don’t worry, I know all the best places.”

The two of you enjoy the festival together. A few people stop Thoma for a short conversation, a knowing twinkle in their eyes when they see you by his side. It’s no secret that he’s quite fond of you, though you don’t seem to notice. He’s okay with that for now; it’d been hard enough to ask you here, much less to ask you to be his.

As you pass the merchant booths, a bracelet of Sango Pearls catches your eye, and Thoma doesn’t hesitate to purchase it for you. You thank him endlessly, sliding it over your wrist, but his face morphs into confusion when you ask the merchant for another one. He knows fashion quite well, and he’s aware that stacking bracelets is indeed a thing, but wouldn’t it do you better to stack different—

His breath hitches when you grasp his hand, soft skin sliding against his, the newly purchased bracelet settling against his wrist.

Oh.

“Beautiful,” you remark, smiling softly, pearls reflecting in your eyes. His heart jumps, but he masks it with a chuckle, scratching the back of his neck.

“We should go,” he says, trying to draw attention away from the blush on his cheeks. “I know a good spot to watch the fireworks show.”

It’s the perfect end to the night. Naganohara Fireworks never fails to impress; Thoma makes a mental note to thank Yoimiya later. You seem to enjoy it too, lips parted slightly in awe, hands clutched tightly to your chest. The fireworks are as stunning as they are loud; pops and crackles of light boom across the night sky, a wonder for your eyes to witness.

Thoma thinks the Shogun might be right about eternity; he wishes this moment would never end.

“You’re beautiful, too,” he whispers.

#genshin impact x reader #albedo x reader #xiao x reader #thoma x reader #genshin impact fluff #genshin impact imagines #genshin x reader #adeptus ink

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lucy90712 · 5 months ago

Text

Family Christmas- Pedri

A/n: Happy holidays guys. I have a surprise new mini series for new years so get ready

1st December

The test stared back at me as it laid face down on the bathroom counter while Pedri stood behind me with his arms wrapped around my waist. We have been sort of trying for a baby but not taking it too seriously by tracking my ovulation or anything so I really wasn't expecting to miss my period only 3 months after coming off my birth control. My period was due 5 days ago and I've had no signs that it will be coming any time soon the only usual symptom I've had is a bit of nausea in the mornings and evenings but that's also a symptom of pregnancy. The thought that I could actually be pregnant has me excited and nervous being a mum is a big change in life a change I know I'm ready for I'm just nervous about doing things wrong.

"Are you ready to find out?" Pedri asked

"I'm ready" I replied

"You don't need to be nervous it's it's not positive we'll just try again it doesn't matter ok" he said

"I know I've just got my hopes up so if it's not positive I'll be a little disappointed" I said

"And that's ok but let's not think about that right now" he said

He kissed my cheek then put his hand on the test waiting for me to do the same so we could flip the test together. I took a deep breath and put my hand next to his then we counted down from three and turned the test over. Staring back at us was two distinct lines just as dark as each other so there's no question I'm definitely pregnant. Without me even noticing tears of joy poured from my eyes which Pedri wiped away before pulling me into the tightest hug. This is the best early Christmas present ever and now we can surprise the rest of our family throughout the holidays.

~~~~~~~~~~

24th December

Way before we found out I was pregnant we agreed to host Christmas with Pedri's family which at the time was a great idea but now I'm sort of regretting it. There is so much that goes into hosting so I've been exhausted all week because the first trimester is really taking it out of me so coupled with all the extra things I've been doing I can barely keep my eyes open by 9pm. Pedri has helped as much as he can but he's only been off for the last few days so now here we are finishing wrapping presents on Christmas Eve and I still have some food to prep.

Usually I do most of the work when wrapping presents as if I don't it will look like a toddler wrapped them in the dark as Pedri doesn't exactly have the eye for wrapping. Under my instruction he did most of the work as then I could just sit there and hold the paper while closing my eyes for a few seconds to get some rest. The main thing we needed to wrap was the things we bought to surprise Pedri's family with the news as they don't know yet. We had our first ultrasound just a few days ago so we added some of the pictures to the little onesie we bought that we customised to have the baby's rough due date on. I can't wait to see their faces a when they find out because it's been so hard to keep it a secret from everyone especially when I've been feeling so awful and having to lie and say it's just a regular sickness.

After we finished wrapping I went to prep some stuff ready to make dinner tomorrow as I don't want to spend all day in the kitchen and not enjoying the festivities. I tried my best to get on with the prep I wanted to do but the smell of the food was making me feel so nauseous I tried to breathe through my mouth or just ignore the smell but I couldn't. Eventually it became too much and I had to run to the bathroom where Pedri quickly joined me to help hold back my hair. To begin with my sickness wasn't too bad but over the last week or so it has definitely got worse there is certain foods that I just can't stomach anymore and the smell of most things makes me nauseous. Once I was feeling better I wanted to go back to the kitchen and finish what I started but Pedri wouldn’t let me he insisted on doing it so I gave him instructions and he did all of it for me.

Pedri joined me back on the sofa and put on a show for us to watch or for him to watch while I fight to keep my eyes open. As predicted I must've fallen asleep as I was woken up by the squeaky step on the stairs as Pedri carried me up them. When he saw my eyes open he cursed the step before telling me to go back to sleep but I would only do that when he tucked me up in bed and gave me the goodnight kiss I missed out on before.

~~~~~~~~~~

25th December

My Christmas morning started out with the most delightful gift of having to run to the bathroom because I woke up feeling overwhelmingly sick. Luckily my hair was already up this time but Pedri still sat by my side and rubbed my back for nothing more than moral support but I appreciate it anyway. He got me a glass of water and helped me up so I could brush my teeth so that we can get on with the days plans. Like the amazing husband he is Pedri made me some toast for breakfast as he knows that’s one of the things I can eat when everything else makes me sick. He also had all my vitamins I'm supposed to take laid out and some water to go with them which so nearly made me cry as all my hormones have had me extra emotional but I managed to hold back.

We agreed that we weren't going to open any presents until Pedri's family arrived but after we finished eating Pedri handed me a gift and told me to open it. Inside was a little photo album meant to capture every first of a baby's life I flicked through the book to see all the moments we can capture in here then I saw that Pedri has already put the first ultrasound picture in there. That was enough to make me cry I can't wait to fill this book with memories and cry again every time I look at it.

"Thank you this is the best gift" I said

"You've already given me the best gift so I had to try and get you something that represents that and I know you love a photo album" he said

"It's perfect I can't wait to keep adding to it" I said

We continued to talk about what our lives will look like over the next year and then for the rest of our lives until Pedri's family arrived and I had to hide the photo album quickly. He ran and let them in and helped them with the bags of presents they'd brought with them while I greeted them all as it's been a while since we were all last together as life has been hectic. Rosy complimented my outfit and told me I looked beautiful which really put a smile on my face as I've not felt good about myself since my pregnancy symptoms took over. We all chatted for a little while catching up before I could see Pedri getting impatient and wanting to tell his family already so I suggested we open presents.

Pedri quickly took over and gave his mum the gift we wrapped yesterday and says it was for all of them so they all gathered round to look at what it was. Seeing the look on their faces as it sunk in made my day. I knew they would all be excited as Pedri's family are all really close but I wasn't expecting the immediate group hug we were both pulled into. I've never heard the word congratulations so many times but it made me happy to know they were so excited as I know our baby will have the best grandparents and uncle.

"congratulations how far along are you y/n?" Rosy asked

"I'm just over 8 weeks so not far along but we couldn’t wait to start telling people" I said

"How have you been feeling?" Fernando asked

"I've been better but I'm doing ok" I answered

"She's been quite sick recently and very tired but she's been a trooper and still living like nothings going on" Pedri said

"The first few few months are tough but it does get better and it's all worth it in the end" Rosy said

"We can take over everything for today you should be resting and taking care of yourself" Fer offered

"Oh no I can't have you do that you're supposed to be guests I'm fine really" I said

"Don't be silly at least let us take over dinner I remember when I was pregnant with the boys the smell of food always set me off" Rosy said

"Ok but I will make up for it at a later date we will invite you over for dinner and I'll cook for you" I said

"That sounds lovely" Fernando said

We opened the rest of the presents we had got for each other but nothing was really able to top the pregnancy surprise we started with. Pedri did get me a little heartbeat reading machine so once the baby is more developed we will be able to listen to their heartbeat at home which I enjoyed. He said he thought about getting this really cute baby onesie he saw but he held back so that we can get the first things together but he did promise to use one of his days off to go baby shopping with me in the new year which at this time in my life is my version of a great day. We also had to joke about the fact that Fer had bought be a nice bottle of wine which of course he wasn't to know was bad timing but it made everyone laugh especially when Pedri said we could pack it in my hospital bag for right after the baby is born.

Then it was time to start on dinner but I wasn't allowed to lift a finger in fact I wasn't even allowed to get myself a drink of water someone else aways did it for me. I was also periodically fed snacks by Pedri who wanted to make sure I'm getting enough nutrients even when I'm not feeling well. At some point I must've fallen asleep as it was light when I last remember being awake but then it was dark out and very dark out. It was a good nap though as I actually felt refreshed and like I had some energy for once. As I slept for apparently most the afternoon dinner was almost ready so I got up to freshen up as I know I look ridiculous when I've just woken up. I fixed my hair and even put on a bit of makeup which made me look and feel more human which is the most I can ask for at the moment.

By the time I was ready the table was being set so I tried to help as I've done nothing all day but Pedri steered me away from the kitchen to the table where he pulled out a chair for me and told me to sit down. I wanted to help but he told me that his parents have it all covered so my job is to just sit and look pretty which he said I'm doing a great job of. He gave me a quick kiss before running back to the kitchen to help. It didn't take long before there was a plate of food put in front of me which looked amazing although I had to try not to smell it as it will make me nauseous. The food was lovely much better than anything I could've made but I guess thats what happens when you get chefs to make your Christmas dinner. I ate as much as I could before I started to feel sick which Pedri could definitely tell as he squeezed my hand under the table to check that I was ok.

The original plan was for everyone to stay and watch a movie after dinner but Pedri's family insisted on leaving us be after cleaning up which again I tried to say wasn't necessary but they insisted on helping out. The house ended up cleaner than it started out so I won't have to clean for a few days which will be nice.

"Thank you for taking over dinner and cleaning I really appreciate all your help" I said as they were all leaving

"There's no need to thank us you've done all the hard work preparing for today" Fernando said

"And if you need anything don't hesitate to reach out even if it's just something small we are all happy to help out" Rosy added

"Thank you guys we really appreciate all your help" Pedri said

"Make sure you take care of her bro and you've got to learn to cook now your a father" Fer said

"I've been trying haven't I love" Pedri said

"He has and he's definitely getting better I don't have to supervise all the time anymore" I said

They congratulated us one more time before leaving so it was just me and Pedri. It wasn't late but we decided to just go to bed as it's been a long day. Pedri definitely wasn't tired but I was so he got me to rest my head on his chest as he played with my hair as he knows that always sends me to sleep.

“Good night mi amor I love you and our little baby so much already” Pedri whispered as I was falling asleep

“We both love you too” I whispered back

#pedri imagines #pedri x reader #pedri imagine #pedri #football imagine

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citruskushh · 2 months ago

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Am I the only one who is thinking that Gales underwear is enchanted to keep him from getting too worked up or turned on? That man is doing everything to stop the risk of explosion. If he isn't also doing the magic equivalent of suppressing his libido, then he's gotta be doing something else for it. (Or just some seriously extreme levels of self control)

As far as I'm concerned his underwear is a chastity belt and he disenchants it once the orb is stable.

More in depth ideas under the cut (it could've been a different post entirely but it's too late now)

I've seen most people say that the underwear is actually what is giving him abs and I have some thoughts.

Hear me out. We all saw the posts a few years back about male actors starving themselves and doing unhealthy practices to gain that muscle that we see in movies. Take Thor for example, Chris Hemsworth spent a lot of time barely eating and drinking a shit tons of water to achieve that look. I'm not saying Gale would be anywhere near that level but it's something to think about.

He's self conscious, trying to fit in, and in a relationship with a literal goddess. To me that all adds up to him probably having been quite fit, even if visible muscle wasn't the look he had, he still would've been very capable and in good shape.

Then he very suddenly has this thing in his chest that is eating him alive, his relationship has ended without his full knowledge, and he is quickly shunned by everyone around. That would take a huge toll on his body, and he probably would get pretty depressed. Personally I'm a lose my appetite kind of depressed so I see that being pretty reasonable with Gale. Maybe he makes big meals so he can try and feel normal but enjoying it just isn't the same when you're alone and in pain. And as much as Tara tries to help, it just isn't the same. To add to that, his stress levels are at an all time high, which can also account for sudden loss of body fat, giving him the look of an action movie lead, without any of the intentional effort.

This is all just my own head cannons / speculation.

Personally I adore Gale for how he is in the game, but I am not against anyone who has different opinions. This is not intending to cause issues or arguments so please refrain from doing so 🩷

#this is all my personal headcannon #if this makes you upset please do us both a favor and block me #im just trying to think logically about it and this is where my brain has ended up #god i hope im not making myself sound like an ignorant asshole #Gale Dekarios #character analysis #character breakdown #bg3 gale #bg3 gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #thoughts

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batmanisagatewaydrug · 5 months ago

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Hi sex witch!

I have been on the combination bc pill for almost 8 years, and I've been seeing a weird amount of stuff online lately talking about how allegedly dangerous birth control can be? How it increases the risk of some cancers, and how it can lead to blood clots mainly. I never really had a talk with my original prescribing doctor at all about side effects (a pediatrician who was a bit judgy about me having safe consensual sex at 17 and I dumped her ass for a wonderful GP).

I was always under the assumption that it 1. Was an extremely low risk. And 2. Was only really concerning if you had other risk factors (ie smoking), but I've been seeing a lot more scary shit about different birth control methods online lately (namely that and implants like nexplanon). Is it just fear mongering, or are these just medical risks we have to be willing to take to avoid pregnancy (another huge medical risk)?

Also follow up question, and I assume my current doctor would've said something if it was of concern, but you never know. Is it okay to be on the same hormonal birth control for as long as I have? Is there really a limit to it if you're only seeing benefits?

Thank you for all your work! o7

hi anon,

what a great question!

the risk factors affiliated with birth control and breast cancer are, indeed, extremely low. in many cases it's difficult to prove any correlation for certainty, and even in cases where some differences have been found between people who have taken hormonal birth control and those who haven't, the difference for those who have is still extremely small - even for folks who have been taking it for over ten years.

for the time being, the only people generally advised against using birth control for cancer-related are usually those already at high risk of breast cancer. it's also worth noting that hormonal birth control actually seems to slightly decrease the risk of ovarian, colon, and endometrial cancers!

the blood clot situation is similar. while some type of hormonal birth control can make blood clots slightly more likely, it still doesn't make them likely, and it's generally not a cause concern unless someone already has a preexisting issue with blood clots.

while there may be some very, very slightly increased risks in the long run, the same is true of any medication, and those risks don't generally compound enough over time to be cause of concern in the absence of any other complicating factors. if you and your healthcare provider have decided this is the best treatment for you, then by all means keep doing it!

fearmongering around contraception isn't new, and the goal behind it has always been restricting the options that people have to prevent pregnancy and control their bodies. one of my favorite (read: most hated) new variants are the crunchy woowoo influencers who try to claim that hormonal birth control is bad because it changes the natural rhythms of your body and fills you with toxins or whatever, to which I say alt spirituality wellness bullshit is barely a step away from healthcare misinformation and vaccine conspiracies and we really shouldn't be giving these people our time and attention. birth control is safe, it's effective, and it's necessary healthcare.

#sex edventures 2024

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cynautica · 3 months ago

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Hi Cyliph, can you tell something about Ar-Lo, he looks so interesting^^

I'm honored people like him :,)

[Potential small HDBS spoilers]]

Ar-Lo is old. Very old. Old enough to be considered somewhat of an cryptic figure among architects. He remembers a time when architects were not all One. Hundreds of thousands of years old. He was created as one of the first waves of expansion during a time when architects had just transferred to their biomechanical vessels. He's seen generations of vessels rise and fall out of use. One of the first ever born with no real parents or family or heritage.

A blank slate of an individual created to protect a colony world known as Juit-Eh from encroaching conflict (At least- that was the intention, the code recombination and manipulation technology was still new).

More below cut.

Who they were fighting, why, and for what has been lost to time. Ar-Lo himself remembers little of that bygone age and its politics. Its been lost to the network through information surges and wipes. What is known is that approximately 300,000 years ago Ar-Lo was functioning as a gladiator primarily based in Juit-Eh still. The indomitable vessel he used (barely modified-- not designed by him) was a real crowd pleaser to architects and non architects alike. It brought in loads of tourism-- and with it currency to the planet. The practice was considered too brutal by homeworld standards, and the end of his career was the annexation treaty that brought Juit-Eh back in to the protection of Oulinaean forces.

This annexation brought Juitian representation to the Tel Ju council. The representative brought a body guard with him, the most popular (former) gladiator known as Ar-Lo. The biggest 'fuck you' he could manage.

As it turns out, when you're primarily locked in the innermost sanctum of the most secure piece of architect territory you don't exactly get much valor. Not that Ar-Lo needed it. His pride was his strict loyalist views and sharp mind. He soon enough became versed enough in political talk that he could hold in own in any debate you threw at him. His trained body language and biolights (from years of existing as nothing but a background ornament) served him well in ensuring no other was able to get under his skin. His oratory skills only highlight his trained physical prowess and his rising influence on political matters made those in charge wary of him.

Ar-Lo proved his competency well enough that he was promoted over the course of years to supreme commander of the military. A scary job, and an isolating one. Not that it made a difference, by the time he reached the position anyone in networking distance already had a firewall up. He was already an unpleasant, paranoid, and a violent loyalist.

Though Ar-Lo had plans for every potential physical threat inside and out he was not prepared for the devastating plague that ripped through the architect colonies. Isolation barrier on isolation barrier proved useless, and with no cure in sight the council had to enact their most dire contingency plan. Ar-Lo was one such soul chosen to stay behind.

...

----

...

Cy fun facts:

Ar-lo was designed as the foil for Robin and Al-an in HDBS, he wasn't suppose to be likeable, but I'm grateful so many people want to know more about him. I cant reveal everything though.

He is brown because he needed to contrast the surrounding landscape, which was primarily green and dark turquoise.

Strange even among architects is that he does not experience dizzyness from vessel swapping no matter the size. Perhaps a remnant of his time as a gladiator, or maybe years of trained neural control.

Ar-lo might hold the record for oldest architect, especially post-kharaa.

His vessel is pretty standard bulky for guardsmen-- but he hasn't always used this vessel.

Before he became a political figure he was actually considered pretty handsome and likeable, like a celebrity. Even though his personality and skill didn't change.

He has never figured out how to properly integrate himself in architect society despite his age. This often leaves him frustrated and the only way he knows to take out that frustration is violence.

Ar-lo is only his current designation

Ar-lo likes art. Not realism, though. He likes art that makes you question things or appreciate the skill of the artist. The piece that represents him most closely is Josef Alber's Homage to the Square: Sentinel

Armor - Oulinaean (homeworld - left) - Jutian house (right) His thick hide serves as natural armor, anything else is just decorative, shows heritage, or is multitool storage.

Playlist:

PRE-KHARAA Seether - Words As Weapons Psychodelic Prn Crumpets - Found God in a Tomato Radiohead - Nude Five Finger Death Punch - Remember Everything Seether - Country Song System Of A Down - Spiders Puddle of Mudd - Blurry POST-KHARAA Soul Survivor - ORDER TotalDeadCenter - The Forgotten Soldier Skaen - Grief, Aftermath Mother Mother - Sleep Awake Vessel - Red Sex (Re-Strung) Vivivivivi - Reduced to Guts Pogo - Undone <- His theme song!

#i fucking love music <3 #feb 2 was his birthday btw :)#subnautica #sbz #subnautica below zero #ask #architect oc #worldbuilding #ar lo #its funny that people ask the most about ar lo when i can say the least about him of any of my characters ;u;#hdbs #hdbs spoilers

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godofdumpsterfalling · 9 months ago

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Headcanon Dump - Hermes & Apollo ft. Dionysus (Riordanverse)

Because I have a mountain of these and if I don’t organize them they will be completely incoherent. Under a cut for length.

- Apollo basically raised Hermes, for all the value of “raised” when concerning gods.

- Maia did not want to be a mother, and had no idea how to. She tried, and did care about Hermes, but was secretly relieved when Hermes took to following Apollo everywhere. Zeus was really perfecting his parenting style of the day, which was caring about his kids from a distance (he had other priorities, they were not really near the top) and occasionally popping in to give some Fatherly Advice or have bonding moment (omg taking his kids fishing…deadbeat dad core for REAL) before fucking off again like “parental control duties DONE I am SUCH a good dad. See you again in like 50 years, sport!” It was particularly bad when Hermes was born.

- Hermes followed Apollo around for a solid couple hundred years, acting as his shadow pretty much. It drove Athena and Artemis CRAZY. Apollo’s extroverted ass was completely baffled by people being off put by his baby brother basically being attached to his back. He’s not gonna bother you he’s just gonna hang out?? What’s the problem??

- Hermes stayed in a younger form for a looong time because he knew Apollo would never say no to him if he looked cute enough. Until he got hit with the depression beam, he kept whipping that form out whenever he got in trouble. He’s baby, your honor, you can’t be mad at a BABY

- Hermes held Dionysus for 2 seconds before he decided he was willing to die for this little guy. The couple hours after he was born were spent by Hermes holding him up to random family members and going “LOOK AT HIM HES SO SMALL” and the family members going “Hermes please do your job”

- When Dionysus joined Olympus, Hermes eagerly took him under his wing in a similar manner to Apollo taking on Hermes. Not as much weird parental responsibility though. But he was still following Apollo everywhere so Apollo got TWO mischievous shadows. Much to Artmemis’ dismay. Why are there TWO OF THEM

- All they ever had to do was duck behind Apollo and he’d defend them against whoever they’d pissed off now even when they were 100% in the wrong. Especially when they were 100% in the wrong, honestly.

- Zeus and Hermes’ relationship has a lot of layers (a post for another time) but the bare bones basics is that early on Zeus just thought he was a Clown (that’s my funny boy <3) and nowadays he’s Zeus’ under appreciated, overworked personal assistant. Although he’s kind of been Zeus’ lapdog since the beginning. Father Please Notice Me I am not as shiny as Apollo but I can roll over so nice pls pls pls

- Hermes has not had a nap in the past century somebody please help him. Give your local delivery man a nice tip because he has like 20 other domains and would rather be doing Literally Anything Else. And also a hug maybe, the most contact he ever gets is when he brushes hands with whoever he’s giving a package. Somebody get this man a paid vacation he has been holding Olympus together with duct tape

- Hermes has the worst case of Middle Child Syndrome Known To Man

- Hermes and Artemis like each other! Shockingly. For reasons unrelated to Apollo, even. They just like to hang out. Hermes is one of the two Olympians she’s happy to be around <3

- Apollo has tried, with varying success, to get Hermes and Athena to be friends. The results have been… mixed.

- Athena, Apollo and Hermes will occasionally have absolutely legendary verbal smackdowns. So brutal that it would actually evaporate a mortal on the spot. Indescribable, really. Anyone who overhears them will never mentally recover,

#mostly silly on account of me being a deeply unserious person. sorry fellas.#if you’re on the discord you’ve probably seen some of these before lol #rrverse #pjo hoo toa #toa #apollo #hermes #Dionysus #rrverse!dionysus #rrverse!hermes #rrverse!apollo #Tony’s Twaddle #<- that’s the me tag now

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kybelles · 7 days ago

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Idk but i feel like many people in the fandom kinda forget that delpha was under akielon's rules before veretian conquered it

hi pookie 💕 sorry it took me a while to get back to this ask because i actually have A LOT of thoughts regarding delpha and i wanted to collect them nicely before i responded.

let me give this disclaimer first: i love these books. i love pacat’s writing. i cannot remember the last time i loved a mc like i love damen. that being said, this does not mean that pacat is immune to criticism (no writer is!) because i believe most of the fandom's attitude towards the delpha/delfeur situation stems from the contradictory attitude of the text itself. why? because the narrative goes back and forth between pointing out that akielons actually had multiple good reasons for wanting delpha back and not-so-subtly painting them as the villains who unjustly occupied a land which they had no cultural or/and historical claim on and well. i’m not the biggest fan of this choice. :)

first of all, the text makes it clear that theomedes was NOT an expansionist. he stopped his campaign before launching an assault on ravenel because of the cost and internal political risk. he wasn’t grabbing land recklessly. he only wanted delpha back and he had good reasons for it, which i will explain.

later we find out that delpha was lost during the reign of king eundros which was, and this part is very important, only ninety years ago. NINETY. while the books never explicitly says how long akielos had delpha before the 90 year rule, when damen and laurent are in kingsmeet and they're going through the line of succession, pretty sure the number of rulers means it would be more than 90 years. damen literally walks past a statue of king eundros, meaning delpha was considered a national loss and not some random military outpost. and if akielos had no historical claim or cultural connection to delpha, why would theomedes even bother trying to retake it?

once again it is critical to underline what a short time NINETY years is. it is barely yesterday in monarchic time. two generations at most. if we assume a generation is ~40 years (especially in noble or ruling families), that's basically damen's grandfather's time. there should still be living people who remember akielon rule: nobles, soldiers, even ordinary townspeople. in monarchic systems, land claims and identities persist for centuries. european powers went to war over territories they hadn't controlled for hundreds of years, citing dynastic inheritance or ancient treaties, etc.

so theomedes’ campaign wasn’t ancient history. it was contemporary enough to be a strategic memory, the idea that "we lost delpha, we can take it back." would have been very real to akielos.

and yet akielos is shown as having little cultural or historical ties to the territory and is painted as the sole aggressor in the conflict with vere. the only delphans that are shown are culturally veretian and unhappy and suffering under akielon rule. all the people in marlas are overjoyed by laurent’s presence whilst damen gets nothing but scorn. we never see what akielon villagers think. no visits to tarasis, no mothers mourning their children from veretian raids, no displaced akielon farmers. yet we’re invited into multiple scenes where veretian civilians suffer and express outrage. the narrative even dramatically has a little girl standing up to the big bad “oppressors”.

this raises significant questions about why there isn't a significant akielon presence in delpha, considering the territory was akielon only ninety years ago. where are the delphan akielons, considering we are told by the text that they have been living there for so many generations? were they all killed in a genocide? and if not, how do they feel about akielos reclaiming the territory under theomedes' rule? this is never given any consideration, which is why i think people forget that vere isn't the only country with significant historical ties to delpha.

if akielos held it for generations (and we get the sense that they did, especially since it has been 'disputed' territory for centuries, meaning this isn't the first time they gained it or lost it), that means:

-there would be akielon architecture, forts, inscriptions, even cultural or linguistic residue.

-families with akielon names or affiliations would still exist, like landed households, merchants, military retirees.

-akielon administrative systems may have shaped local governance especially if the transition to veretian control was violent or contested.

instead, the narrative presents delpha as fully veretian, with no meaningful akielon minority or memory. that’s implausible and HIGHLY suspicious.

the complete absence of delphan akielons raises a lot of serious questions. if delpha had been akielon for generations, where are the people with akielon identity? if they weren’t assimilated or erased, do they support akielon rule? do they see vere as the aggressor? none of that gets explored, which is a huge omission, especially in a story that’s otherwise very invested in the politics of land, rule, and cultural legacy.

the story frames delpha almost entirely through veretian suffering and perspective, despite the fact that it was vere who conquered it just ninety years ago! that's not that long in the context of monarchic rule. it’s like the narrative subtly naturalizes veretian ownership while delegitimizing akielos’, even when akielos is just trying to take back a territory it ruled for centuries. that framing choice is worth questioning.

these narrative choices also force us to think about just what kind of conquest was vere’s. since wars are not won by throwing roses at your opponent's feet, if the delphans are shown as uniformly veretian and anti-akielon, then vere’s conquest either included mass (forced) assimilation, elite replacement, or worse (!!!) ethnic cleansing or cultural erasure.

if that didn’t happen, then where are the akielon-leaning factions in delpha now? either way, the narrative skips the hard questions of what conquest looks like and who gets remembered, and that’s deeply political.

there's no exploration of divided loyalties in delpha, no delphans torn between akielon heritage and veretian rule. there's no acknowledgment of how power shapes memory: veretian propaganda, military presence, or cultural dominance could have absolutely rewritten how delpha sees its own history.

instead, we get a neatly polarized image: veretians good and oppressed, akielons bad and occupying… despite the historical reversal that undermines that story.

that framing isn't neutral at all, it reveals whose voice the narrative privileges. it’s not that vere is objectively in the right; it’s that we’re given no alternative viewpoint.

and that, in turn, makes readers forget that akielos also has legitimate historical ties, cultural memory, and likely, support in delpha.

vere takes land historically held by akielos, then in the space of less than a century, erases akielon cultural and political presence so completely that the native population (delphans) are portrayed as fully veretian.

akielos is then painted as the aggressor, even when trying to reclaim land it once ruled. this is classic colonialist reversal: the colonizer recasts themselves as the native, and the native becomes the invader.

lastly, the narrative also makes it seem like the “sins” of akielos can only be atoned if damen gives delpha back to vere, which again leaves a bad taste in the mouth because damen, a former slave, is now agreeing to return marlas to the nation that enslaved him. he even refers to the “the ghost of its veretian grace” and this language echoes real-world colonized elites praising the supposed refinement and "grace" of the empire that dominated them. the contrast is stark: veretian ruins are mourned. akielon victories are regretfully undone.

#captive prince #asks #massive shoutout to my friends for being willing to discuss this topic with me 🥺 couldn’t stitch this together without my girls’ help ❤️#also a massive shoutout to the anon for allowing me to share these thoughts 🫶🏼#before anyone says something like why do you even care since the kingdoms are one empire again: the context matters 🙂#the narrative choices matter 🙂

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licncourt · 4 months ago

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What in particular makes you like Louis so much?

What is about Louis that you love so much? What draws you to him? Also do you know any other Louis lover accounts?? x

My gross baby book Louis….that’s hard, I actually had to think about it because I’d never really sat down and wondered why, even though I've been licking his nasty head like a mother cat since I was like 14. Though in a way I guess I have since I keep writing fics trying to figure him out and understand what makes him tick and why I care. VC, especially IWTV/Louis as a character has been such a fixture of my teenage and adult life, basically ten years now. That’s crazy to think about!

The first thing I want to talk about as far as what makes Louis so interesting is just how unpalatable he is without that being the point of the character . He’s not explicitly a villain, but the narrative isn’t asking you to like him either, he’s a wildcard with no clear character typing to fall back on. He came from the author’s grief and you can really feel that from the start. He’s like grief in a lot of ways, they carry the same pain and ugliness but nothing really exists without it, it’s just the dark side of love. He’s not supposed to be likable, the point isn’t even for the reader to empathize with him. What you make of him is 100% up to you. He’s not there to sway you in any particular direction in his regard. He’s doesn’t care what you think anyway.

At the very least, we can say he’s not at all a roguish, charming antihero character like Lestat eventually settles into, but he never becomes the stereotypical brooding-vampire-with-a-moral-compass archetype that he would directly inspire in the future (Edward Cullen, Angel from Buffy, Stefan Salvatore, etc). He’s not less evil than Lestat or any other vampire and he certainly isn’t aspirational, but his flaws are extremely human in a way that’s almost jarring. Becoming a vampire didn’t make him anything he wasn’t already (as opposed to Lestat or Armand). It’s just a catalyst for the unveiling of his true self, good and bad. He’s the scorpion who stings the frog and an ouroboros trying to muster the courage to sever its own tail. He’s ruled by his intrinsic nature.

[More under the cut because my brain worm took over]

Akasha calls him the most predatory of all the vampires and in a way that’s true. He never does anything by halves and there’s a violence in him that doesn’t come from vampirism, it’s something much deeper and more inherent to him than that. I’ve compared him to the gay serial killer phenomenon for that reason. When he kills, you see his weakness (physical and mental) because it’s messy and brutal and sexual and animalistic, completely primal, there’s nothing elegant or darkly seductive about it. He’s not a romantic vampire aristocrat taking a little drink like Lestat, he’s more similar to the revenants from vampire folklore, a Nosferatu with a pretty face which is somehow more disturbing. It makes you want to look away and look deeper at the same time. It’s either control or carnage.

A large part of what makes him HIM rests on that control (and the lack thereof). It’s what makes Louis such a time bomb, but also so relatable even despite everything else about him. So many people can understand what it’s like to have an eating disorder and be on the brink of a binge that will just restart the cycle, an addict white knuckling sobriety, a religious gay person fighting every natural impulse they have in an attempt to stay out of Hell, a victim of sexual assault who feels damaged beyond their ability to repair, to be suicidal and angry and horny and hungry and have no idea where to put any of it because putting it anywhere feels like an inexcusable failure somehow so you’re just paralyzed.

There aren’t very many characters who simply EXIST the way he does, completely laid bare by the narrative with a strange neutrality that makes him sort of a mirror for your own personality and life experience. He’s completely evil, deeply sympathetic, and morally gray all at once in a manner that feels very true to life. I think we all know a Louis or have been one at some point. A victim whose actions are still inexcusable, a perpetrator who is also abused, someone pitiful and loathsome at the same time but both are equally valid. Someone who thinks they’re completely self aware but that couldn’t be further from the truth. The embodiment of “an explanation but not an excuse”.

His appeal comes from his lack of appeal in a lot of ways, and how he exists primarily in the subtext of the narrative. You have to go looking for Louis if you want to really find him in the story. Especially since IWTV is from his POV, you have to pick apart what he says from what that actually means because the gap is WIDE. Nothing is spoon fed to you with him, it’s a never ending struggle to untangle him from his own perception of himself, then Lestat’s perception of him, Armand’s perception, David’s perception, even Marius’ perception. He’s a constant and brutal voyeur of himself who’s always the subject of observation and attempts to explain who and what he is to such a degree that the character shatters into a kaleidoscope. He’s almost a Helen of Troy figure where his agency is constantly being vied for (though unsuccessfully) and he can never quite escape the narratives other people place onto him. The narrative itself condemns him when he tries.

Something about Louis (maybe his beauty and supposed weakness) makes every other character feel like they have him figured out (maybe the reader too, for a while) but the conclusions never align and you get the impression the real him is somewhere in the cracks. Because of that, I’m also very interested in his own internal narrative and morality. It’s consistent in its inconsistency. The way he looks at the world is completely absurd, but he also has an unwavering point of view that informs even the most seemingly inexplicable of actions and it makes itself known the more he insists otherwise. Eventually, the narrative turns on him via the author and this particular flaw doesn’t matter anymore because that narrative has already judged and sentenced him anyway.

He’s just a walking contradiction to untangle. He’s so sensitive and emotional but so incredibly cold and callous. His sexual orientation keeps him up at night for decades but owning human beings seemingly never does at all. He’s deeply intelligent but totally out of touch with reality. He’s equally self loathing and uppity. He’s female-coded so deeply that he somehow experiences misogyny but he’s also a paragon of white, wealthy male privilege, intrinsically feminine and intrinsically masculine. Everything is his fault and nothing is. Mother and maiden, passion and apathy, his own shadow self, life and death, Adam and Eve.

Even with all of that though, there’s a certain charm and very real, dimensional tenderness to him that feels jarring contrasted against his mundane evil and vice versa. He’s awkward and strange and you get the impression that he always has been, he loves his daughter more than anything in the world, his favorite movies are The Company of Wolves and Beauty and the Beast, he’ll forgive the people he cares for just about anything, he’s always curious and almost childlike in how he interacts with art and nature and beauty in general, he wants to go to church, he still wears clothes that mimic the silhouettes of his human life, he tries to be a good brother but never quite manages, he gets carried away with crushes, he grew up too fast but his frontal lobe had barely finished developing when he died. He gnaws on grass and wears dusty sweaters and hates white sugar. He can be repelled with a cross because he chooses to be.

It’s maddening how he’s ALMOST lovable and ALMOST irredeemable, but those two things coexist so closely that you can’t quite fit him into box no matter how hard you try. If anyone ever found the “right” box for him, the character of Louis would cease to exist. I hope I never fully figure him out because then the puzzle would be finished and I just don’t think that’s the point.

Anyway, there’s more I could say but I think that’s plenty for now! I hope that made some amount of sense at least.

Also I've been SO logged off for like a year so I have absolutely no idea who is actively Louisposting right now, but in terms of having good VC takes (Louis included) I will always trust @nasnyys @zisurru @swedenis-h @mothpdf and @loelett to not let me down!

#wow that was so much girl that’s crazy #i need to lie down #vc #the vampire chronicles #interview with the vampire #louis de pointe du lac #meta #answered

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wontshutup · 1 year ago

Text

"Not even if they were the last people on earth"

Megumi Fushiguro x Reader

HI! It has been a fairly long time since I've written something, anything, I was stuck in a years long writers block but I've finally decided to write a small Megumi x reader one shot.

Enemies to lovers kind of situation, very cliché hahaha.

Hope you enjoy

Warnings: none I guess, probably a swear word or two, I don't really know. Reference to violence, not very explicit.

Word count: 1356

English isn't my first language.

“Aaand here we go again” you said pouting mockingly towards your partner as he gave you an irritated look.

“Shut up” he gave you a side eye while pressing an ice pack to his head.

“You know, you could’ve avoided that if you actually listened to me instead of going all with this treasure I summon at the slightest inconvenience” you then flinched in pain as a sharp pang in your rib cage made you fold.

“Yeah right, because you had the situation all under control there” he rolled his eyes, gritting his teeth at the strong headache he had, unable to pin point if it was due to his injuries or due to your nagging.

In the front seat your teacher, Gojo Satoru, listened amused at your arguing. He knew the two of you wouldn’t get along even if you were the last people on earth, aside from that you were his strongest and most experienced students, knowing your dynamics as classmates was very different from your dynamic when on missions, your usual banter turning into calculated and effective analysis and strategies with a high success rate, which is why he had been deep in thought all the ride back to Jujutsu Tech as to how was it that your mission had been more challenging than predicted, that was until one of you started to point out the flaws of the other throughout the mission.

“Now now, stop it you two! You need to save your energy to heal!” he said more mockingly than caringly. “Tell me, what happened?”

As much as you felt the need to prove your posture right about Megumi’s reckless actions you acquired a more serious posture and gave your outlook on the matter “turns out the intel was actually not precise, that curse was at least a grade 1 and the intel said it was barely a grade 3” you started

“There also wasn’t any sign of evolution in the course of the mission which means this had been it’s grade since the beginning, so either the intel was wrong..”Megumi continued

“ Or planted” finished Gojo, nailing exactly the point the two of you were getting to.

“Good thing you managed to get out of there alive” he continued, his tone being more serious

“Barely” you added, earning a glare from Megumi as he knew you intended to put the blame on him.

“Yeah, barely” Gojo took your remark as a point to take on account “you listen to me, as far as we know by now, if the information was planted and sent from the higher ups that means you by now have a target on your back. Not really surprising considering you both have remarkable techniques and names, making you both notably dangerous, not to add, you’re under my tutoring and well, we know they’re not very fond of me either. Whoever did this knew how things would go and what they wanted” he adjusted the rearview mirror for you to be able to look eye to eye “you can’t tell anyone about this ok?, as long as we don’t have the identity of whoever did this, better to lay low and don’t let anyone know that we know, understood?”

You and Megumi nodded, a deep silence settled between the three of you as you arrived at Jujutsu tech and the infirmary.

Shoko tended to your wounds and walked out the place to talk to Gojo, knowing she would be a trustworthy person, as you tried to listen in what they were saying you could listen to Megumi groan in annoyance

“So nosy” he referred to you as he rolled his eyes, getting a similar reaction

“At least I care enough to not get killed in the future, not that you know anything about valuing your own life” you poked at how he always seemed so eager to give his all without caring for his sake when a mission got harder than expected.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about” His tone had raised now, anger clear in his voice “not that you know anything about sacrificing yourself for anyone in a mission, you selfish coward” he was harsh with his words, knowing you had struck a chord he attacked back.

You widen your eyes at his remark, stepping closer to him “sorry for wanting to get out alive! What good would my death bring to anyone anyway huh?” you were now gritting your teeth together “what good is a noble sacrifice if that is your last noble act?”

His eyes didn’t falter from you, you were right in your words, he knew you had won this argument, but now he wouldn’t dare to back off, towering more at your stance, inching his face near yours

“Idiot” was the one thing he could mutter as he knew you had the upper hand, your expression turning smug at noticing this.

“What is it Fushiguro? No righteous argument to shoot back?” you raised your eyebrows at him, being able to see each of his reactions due to your proximity.

Not ever had you been so close to each other, except when sparring sessions came around, also ending up having the upper hand over him most of the time. “And once again you’ve lost”

“You” he hissed as he clenched his fist, now getting closer, both of your breaths mixing with each other, making you slightly blush at the feeling, a tingling sensation. It seemed that you were noticing for the first time how beautiful his eyes were.

He too was feeling a certain anxious feeling rise within him, a feeling he had felt multiple times when he had you press on top of him while after defeating him in hand to hand combat. His eyes traveled to your face noticing how your cheeks were a soft pink hue. He still held his body tense but now more due to the proximity, his anger now forgotten.

At noticing how the atmosphere had changed you pulled back, much to his dismay, both your faces heated up as you turned your back to him.

“We should leave you know” you didn’t look back at him, trying to calm down this weird feeling you had experienced. Out of anyone on campus Megumi Fushiguro was the last person you wanted to feel that way towards, the thought alone had made you squirm in distaste at times but now…you weren’t so sure.

“Y-yeah, I guess we should” Megumi was snapped from the daze he was, a lot of different thoughts had run through his mind. No, he refused to give in to acknowledging what just happened. He didn’t like you, he couldn’t like you. You and him had done nothing but jab at each other since the day you met, there was no way he would just forget about all that due to some closeness with you, then again, it wasn’t the first time he felt that but honestly he had just attributed it to “teenage rushes”.

“Happy to see you two managed not to kill each other while we were gone!” said Gojo in his usual cheery tone, his six eyes telling him what had really been going on but refused to put you in that embarrassing spot, on the other hand, he would talk about that to Megumi later, he couldn’t wait to see his annoyed reaction.

“Ha- ha real funny sensei” you said, still cooling down from what had happened.

Megumi rolled his eyes at them.

“Anyway, the both of you get some rest. Shoko and I will get on today’s little incident, we will keep you updated as soon as we can get some information” he kept going

“In the meantime rest and do as your teacher instructs you” completed Shoko, giving you both a sympathetic smile

“Understood” you said as Megumi just nodded and left for your rooms unaware of the way Shoko and Gojo shared a complicit smile.

“Yeah right, not even if they were the last people on earth, don’t make me laugh” Gojo scoffed earning a laugh from Shoko.

A situation neither you or Megumi found funny.

#megumi fushiguro #fushiguro megumi x reader #fushiguro megumi #jjk megumi #jjk x reader #jjk oneshot #enemies to lovers #gojo satoru #shoko ieiri

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