#which does not bode well for this weekend bc i have to share a room on Saturday night rip me
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#im so tired :-(#and i have so much to do :-((#and i leave again tomorrow for more field work :-(((#i have to write a 3 page report by next week despite the fact the ppl already have my fucking thesis#plus i just threw together a shitty poster which i have to fix some stuff on and that just seems fucking impossible rn bc i keep crying#and i have to put together a prezi presentation for another thing. like i could just do a PowerPoint but a prezi would be nicer so i guess#im just not gonna sleep next week rip#and i have to input a fuckton of data so i had do analysis on the data i spent 3 weeks collecting#and i have to redo 1 sample and work on writing papers#plus draw a bunch of figures for various things#and fill out reimbursement paperwork even tho i start crying when i think abt it#and find a hotel and logistics for a conference#which like i shouldnt have said yes to that. i just. like i had a full on meltdown bc i cant seem to be able to take the steps to sort it#out and its looming up and im so tired. i dont even want to go but i already said yes and its for a group project#like seriously just ask for help. but i just keep laying on the floor crying#which does not bode well for this weekend bc i have to share a room on Saturday night rip me#and i need to take care of lots of tedious little adult things that my brain wont let me do#and coordinate going home for Thanksgiving which i really want to do but again it seems so impossible rn#how am i supposed to 'take a break and recover' when the universe is trying to crush me to pieces?#whatever i have a 3.5 hr car ride with 2 ppl that i have to emotionally prepare for#this is prob just the product of not enough sleep but like why do stupid little things have to be so hard?#why cant i not work on stuff for like 10hrs over 2 days and not feel horribly guilty?#oh god and im gonna be the one in charge of the feild work. i just realized bc i am the most important person for the measurements we have#to take. i hate it. im tired#but i have to work on this stupid ugly poster. the topic is fucking boring and i dont want to do it#but whatever its fine. im only paid for 29hrs a week but its fine#god i dont even want to kno how many hrs ive actually been doing#unrelated
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