#which comes across as being emotionally distant when it's really just 'i love *too* much and it's hurting me

[the-cat-at-the-theatre-door]

I’m a huge fan of platonic Misto and Tugger. They’re best friends, joined at the hip. And while most Jellicles look at Misto and think “look at that weirdo (affectionate)” and look at Tugger and go “wow look at that guy, he’s so cool, can you even imagine being that cool?” Tugger and Misto flip the script. Misto looks at Tugger like “look at that weirdo (affectionate)” while Tugger looks at Misto like “wow look at that guy, he’s so cool, can you even imagine being that cool?”

And a familial headcanon: Munkustrap and Old Deuteronomy both have so so so much respect for each other but aren’t the best at communicating with each other in practical terms, which has led to YEARS of Jellicle Balls where Munkustrap is like “the retelling of the Rumpus Cat story is SO stressful to organize and act out. But I know it’s Dad’s favorite part of the ball so I’ll keep doing it for him <3 ” and in the meantime Old Deuteronomy is going “The retelling of the Rumpus Cat story is by FAR the most boring part of the ball every year, but I know it’s Munkustrap’s favorite part, so I’ll keep sitting through it without saying anything <3”

I love me some platonic Tugger and Misto, and bless Deuteronomy and Munk for being equally bleeding hearts, but also absolutely terrible at actual practical communication. They're...sort of trying.

[jjwantsme]

the happiest girl in the world

- v.h

pairing: vinnie hacker x grumpy!girlfriend!reader

summary: in which you think he finally became fed up of you

Warnings: angst, sad vinnie, absolute fluff, pet names, crying, mentions of trauma, reader grew up in foster care

authors note: yall this is my first time posting on tumblr so please be kind😭😭 although constructive criticism is very much appreciated

masterlist

Much to your parents disbelief, you weren’t a complete idiot. You knew how to read body language and tone, knew how to tell if you weren’t wanted at the moment. You just never expected it from your own boyfriend.

Okay, let's admit, that's a little dramatic. Streaming on twitch is part of his job, it shouldn't be surprising, or insulting, when he takes multiple hours devoting his time to it; yet, sometimes it feels like the most invalidating thing in the world. It was becoming his excuse for everything, every date he missed or quality time he randomly walked out on. To be fair, you weren't exactly a little ray of sunshine. Your personality was definitely more on the brutal side- which wasn't your fault! Having trauma at the age of a toddler, growing up in foster care...it's no surprise that you're a little rough around the edges.

Most people didn't know how to handle it. They'd get flustered with your short temper, get angered at your rude comments, or even yell at you when you have trouble feeling emotions. Nobody even gave you a chance.

Vinnie changed that, though.

He was patient with you, and never tried to abandon you even when you asked him to. He understood why you act the way you do, and even helped you cope with it. He helped you become happy. For the first time in your goddamn life, you were happy. And now it’s all crashing down, because you fucked it up.

You don’t know how, when, or why- but you fucked it up. Why else would he be distant?

Vinnie was never the type to be distant. He’s always been clingy- emotionally and physically. He always had to have his hand in yours, or an arm around your shoulders. He always felt the need to verbally show you his affection, and expected the same in return. You, on the other hand, completely opposite- but that’s exactly why you two worked so well. You were contrasted to perfection, you balanced each other out in the best way, and kept each other seen.

So, then, why does it suddenly feel like you’re being avoided?

You sighed as all these thoughts pounded in your head, laying in vinnie’s bed as he was streaming in just the other room.

Or, you thought he was streaming, until he walked in his room to get a bottled water, his eyebrows furrowed as he stared at his phone.

Your mouth moved faster than your brain as you sat up, “vin?”

His eyes widened a little as they snapped to look at you, a little startled by the sound of your voice, “yea?”

“Can we talk?”

That was the sentence vinnie had been dreading for days now. his avoidance finally caught up to him. He could have just lied and said he was busy, but it’s too hard to neglect a voice as sweet as yours. “Of course, my love.” He sighed quietly before stepping towards the king-sized bed, sitting across from you so he could see your face.

“I, uh…i don’t really know how to say this,” you sucked in a breath as you tried to remember how to express your emotions.

Vinnie looked away from your eyes and played with his fingers. He knew this day would come, regardless of him praying that it wouldn’t.

“Are you breaking up with me?” The two of them asked at the same time, making their eyes pop out of their heads.

“You’re breaking up with me?!” Vinnie exclaimed, looking into her eyes again in a moment of panic. “No, you shithead, i thought you were breaking up with me!”

“Why would i be breaking up with you?!”

“Because you’re avoiding me!”

“I was avoiding you because i thought you were gonna break up with me!”

“Huh?” Your voice lowered as your frown deepened, realizing how miscommunicated their relationship has become.

“Yeah…” vinnie’s face went red as he realized he had no choice but to confront the growing tension, “lately you seemed a little more annoyed than usual. I tried to tell myself it was probably because of Uni, or something that didn’t involve us, but…it quickly became clear that i’m what’s wrong. I always knew i wasn’t enough for you, but i guess it just hurts to finally be acting on it.”

His words broke your heart.

This whole time, you were overthinking his annoyance of you, thinking that he was fed up. When, in reality, he was thinking the same thing all along.

“Baby,” you placed your cold hand on his warm cheek, watching as his brown eyes sparkled with admiration, “I’m so sorry for making you think that was true, and i’m even more sorry for not knowing you felt this way. Yeah, finals have been tough this semester, but i shouldn’t have taken it out on you. I’m such an asshole.”

He smiled a bit, “yeah, but a really cute one.”

You let out a small laugh and shoved his shoulder lightly, making him giggle.

“Kidding, kidding. But, seriously, i think we need to work on our communication. This situation definitely wasn’t handled the right way. I hate knowing my baby thought i was leaving her.”

You blushed deeply and smiled wide, shaking your head. You hated pet names, and he knew that. Well, in complete honesty, you loved them. You just hated how happy and giddy they made you- Vincent doesn’t have to know that part, though.

Vinnie leaned in and pecked your lips before mumbling, “i love you, so much more than you can imagine.”

“I may be an asshole, but you make me the happiest girl in the world. I love you too, vin.”

And you sealed that promise with a kiss, a kiss that lasted until the sunrise of the next morning.

[lutorao]

based on character analysis, I asked the AI ​​how Law would behave in the different situations and this is the answer

this is exactly how he acts around luffy

If he likes Luffy but doesn’t want to admit it, he would act cautiously, perhaps even distant or cold at times, as a defense mechanism to keep himself from getting emotionally vulnerable.

When Law refuses his feelings, he’d likely become more annoyed or irritated around Luffy—especially when Luffy does things that Law subconsciously finds endearing. He might snap at Luffy or brush off his actions as if they don’t affect him, when in reality, they affect him deeply. Law would struggle with moments of tension, like his heart racing when Luffy is close, but he’d work hard to suppress those emotions, acting as though Luffy’s presence has no impact on him. Law’s protective nature might also flare up unconsciously—he’d watch out for Luffy without making it obvious, all while telling himself that it’s just because they’re allies, not because of any deeper feelings.

If Law doesn’t quite know what he’s feeling yet, he might become introspective and confused. He would probably notice that he feels different around Luffy—more tense, more on edge—but wouldn’t immediately understand why. Law isn’t as emotionally open as Luffy, so he would likely try to figure it out logically, analyzing every interaction and growing frustrated with his inability to compartmentalize his emotions. His usual cool, composed demeanor might slip slightly around Luffy, showing in subtle signs like averting his eyes or stiffening up when Luffy gets too close.

At times, Law might get caught off guard by how much he enjoys Luffy’s company, leading to brief moments where he lets his guard down—like a small smile or a soft response—but he’d quickly try to rein those feelings back in. His confusion would come across in how he tries to maintain control of the situation, avoiding any emotional vulnerability. Yet, at the same time, he’d find himself drawn to Luffy, maybe even a little possessive or protective, which would only add to his internal conflict.

If Luffy is in love with Law but hasn’t yet realized it, his feelings and actions would likely reflect a mix of confusion and excitement. Luffy tends to act on instinct, so even if he doesn’t fully understand what he’s feeling, he’d know that he really wants to see Law and be around him.

Luffy might not exactly feel nervous in the traditional sense, but he could be restless—bouncing on his feet, excited to see Law, thinking about how much fun they’ll have, and feeling unusually focused on impressing him (even if he doesn’t realize why). Luffy’s carefree nature would remain, but there might be small, unconscious gestures showing affection, like being more thoughtful or attentive to Law’s reactions.

As for his love language, it would probably be a combination of acts of service and physical touch. He might bring food , because he knows Law likes them, even if Luffy doesn’t understand the romantic undertones. He might also be more touchy—like casually bumping shoulders or leaning into Law without realizing how intimate these gestures might seem. His usual confidence would likely remain, but there’d be a more playful, childlike excitement to everything he does, as if he wants to share every moment with Law.

[monmelia]

I wasn’t a huge fan of Amelia’s relationship with Kai either! I like Amelia a lot but kai was super dull to me (couldve been direction because the actor has been good in other roles). I just couldn’t buy the depth of their connection because it always felt like Kai was keeping Amelia at arms length but Amelia couldn’t tell and instead fell deep. Only for nothing to come out of it. The one time I actually felt passion between them and was during the whole London back-and-forth, which I thought was really well executed in terms of examining a central part of Amelia’s characterization

Yeah honestly I agree. I also love Amelia, but I just didn't feel Kai was the right person for her. Like you pointed out I feel like they held Amelia at arm's length which made it hard to feel like they ever shared a deep connection. It always felt to me like Amelia was all in while Kai held back, and even though Kai may have had genuine feelings, they came across as emotionally distant and sometimes unengaged. Their relationship always felt more like lust than love to me. Amelia fell hard, but Kai’s consistent distance makes it difficult to see it as anything deeper, and I think Amelia was just too smitten to see how incompatible they were long term.

I feel like Kai gave a lot of mixed signals—claiming not to want to lead Amelia on, yet they kept the relationship going, encouraging her to invest emotionally, despite always knowing they didn't want the life Amelia had. It cuts even deeper that Kai broke up with Amelia but then came back only to then end the relationship for similar reasons. Their comment about being in “different places in life” felt disingenuous, especially after how much they’d pursued her both initially and post breakup. To me it comes across like Kai wanted a selective version of Amelia that fit their terms, not a genuine, loving relationship.

They said they wanted to get to know “all of Amelia,” but they never tried to know or embrace her child. And my issue isn't with Kai not wanting kids and them wanting different things, it's with the fact Kai strung it out for so long despite always knowing what they wanted vs how Amelia's life was set out. The long-distance comment, where Kai suggested the arrangement worked because Amelia could “spend half her time with Scout and half with them,” and about how great it was that the two worlds never collided showed that despite trying to convince Amelia that they loved her unconditionally, Kai only really wanted part of Amelia, not the whole person she actually is.

And it just makes me sad to see Amelia finally trust and open herself up more to have it blow up in her face when it all could have been avoided. If anything, the relationship just deepens her abandonment wound, and the fact that Kai knew about her issues with abandonment makes it even worse because instead of reassuring Amelia, Kai accuses her of being “obsessed with being needed,” and almost uses that vulnerability against her.

Sorry I'm ranting here, but I'm just really not a fan of this relationship. They have Amelia call Kai her puzzle piece which makes sense from her perspective because she see's them as fitting seamlessly, but the truth is that Kai only wanted to engage in a particular version of Amelia's life.

For someone to be your “puzzle piece,” they surely need to genuinely want to fit into your life as a whole. Kai doesn’t complete the picture; instead, they choose only the pieces that fit into their own life’s framework, which excludes parenthood and Amelia’s need for deep emotional security. They only want the fragments of the puzzle.

The plus side of this is that Amelia got to learn more about what she truly needs in a partner: someone willing to be present and supportive, who embraces her as a complete person, and I'm hopeful she's going to find her missing puzzle piece in Monica.

Or maybe a puzzle piece isn't what she needs. Maybe the goal isn’t to find someone who fits perfectly, like a puzzle piece, filling in every gap. Instead, maybe it’s about finding someone who stands beside her —a piece that compliments her without needing to complete her, but who wants to be involved with all aspects of her life.

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

I know you all know by default how much I love this conversation, but in RD at least, a lot of characters fall out of relevancy after a certain point (whereas in PoR you could argue that having full supports prevents this). Shinon is one of the only side characters who doesn't really do this, having three base conversations throughout part three (which is pretty fucking good considering several of the chapters aren't even with the Greil Mercenaries).

Back in PoR, Shinon asks for praise/gratitude. Expects it. By this point he doesn't want it anymore. He didn't want it when he was selling bows for emergency income (which Rolf took up as well) and he doesn't want it here either. His personality has chilled out so much from being a hothead and he's much more expressive of his actual feelings (even if you compare his standard death quotes in both games, he's much more emotionally expressive in RD).

A lot of characters - most honestly, including even the GMs (barring Boyd if he A supports Mist which gives him more content and expresses a whole lot of maturity compared to PoR Boyd) tend to drop off in development. They might stick around (ex. PoR puts all the major groups in the spotlight until the next group shows up and goes through all of them), but the development eventually stagnates outside of supports (including in base conversations, which this one is such).

Since RD doesn't get supports with full conversations, you only get snippets of development/characterization through them, while the base conversations may offer insight into the characters and show you how they've changed over the years but don't truly develop them. Shinon is a very lucky situation for his character because he keeps returning in both games, and it helps develop him across both games with a full timeline (similar to Naesala, who has a fully fleshed out story and personality development over both games and never stops dead at any point in the pair of games).

In PoR Shinon was distant and selectively a bit cold (Greil, Rolf and Gatrie excluded from that, and Mist to an extent as well). RD gives the impression that he just... doesn't care about all that anymore. He's fine where he is and has learned he can live with these people and not have to expect betrayal. He doesn't have to anticipate being on his own ever again. There's no real reason for him to keep up the walls and barriers to protect himself, and he's not living just to survive anymore.

Most times when I end up loving a character it's because of the content given to me and what have I to work with, rather than loving a character and searching for things to love. I fully expect that that's why I finally, after years of being unable to decide who my Tellius favorite was because I loved several of them too dearly to decide, found myself able to settle on Shinon.

When I got older and gave it more thought, considering all the development and traits of each of them and how responsive I was to them, one day I asked myself, well okay, what if someone asked you who your favorite was? What if you still did love the same ones as your number one, all of them, but could only give one name quick and simple? Who would you pick? The first name that instantly hit me was Shinon. That was enough for me to decide okay, there's a reason he's the first person who instantly came to me if I had to truly settle on one. I hadn't quite figured it out yet, but I knew there was a reason that if I had to pick a single standout, it would be him.

A lot of it harkens back to this conversation. It is development in and of itself, and also very expressive of who he is. The fact that he also doesn't fall off in conversations and is more recurring than not also gives me more to examine about him and more to think about. It puts him in a more likely position to think about him and who he is than I would for characters the writers didn't really bother developing (including other recurring characters like Marcia, who keep coming back in both games similar to Shinon, but see no development as a person - unfortunately in her case, in either game).

He has a very rich, detailed and unforgotten-by-the-writers character and one whose story ends on a very high note. I say "ends" in the sense of main story/base content, but it technically continues if he's taken to the Tower and gains the ability to A support various other characters who he otherwise could not support or could only reach a B support with, such as Sanaki, Tibarn, etc. This conversation is like an accumulation of his growth between both games, including the subtle things you can only pick up on through actions/other character lines.

Ike says he (everyone, which includes Shinon) chose to stay with them when he told everyone who their next employer was/what they'd be doing/etc, and Ike gave him and Soren an out if they weren't comfortable with it. They weren't all forced to go. That says by itself that Shinon made that choice on his own. He chose to stay with them when he was not yet totally comfortable with laguz and was still working on that part of himself (the fact that he uses the term "laguz" at all is already a huge step up from where he leaves off on his A support with Janaff, which did not leave off poorly at all).

Last time Shinon was uncomfortable with something in the Greil Mercenaries, he made the choice to leave. When he did come back, he was not exclusively surrounded by only the GMs and otherwise, purely laguz (which prior to meeting Janaff I would argue he was not ready for at all at the time). Here, he was, and he still made the choice to stay with them knowing exactly what his situation would look like.

Another thing worth considering is how much of a hothead Shinon was in PoR, but he still took Rolf on as a student. While I'm not sure exactly how accurate Mist's statement is about "forcing" Rhys to teach her (it's possible she was pushy about it because he didn't want to, such as because it might mean she might end up on the battlefield), we do know Rolf wanted to learn and was accepted.

We can easily infer through their conversations that Shinon would rather teach him to survive and have a safety net rather than worry about him being on a battlefield. Shinon saw that he was motivated to learn and, regardless of the fact that he was still in survival mode himself and not of the mind of "I'll be with these people forever and want to help them", taught him while apparently having told him "things like this happen" with mercenaries (i.e. different employers, separation, etc). If they ended up on opposite sides but Rolf could wield a weapon, that could endanger him, but he does it anyway. His priority is always survival, but it's also the survival of children and anyone he cares about. He also dies begrudgingly in his PoR death quote, which is completely opposite of his death quote against Rolf.

Another thing for me: he's also very confident and aware of his capabilities as a marksman. He knows what he's worth and at this point, he no longer brags about it (he used to all the time in PoR). He sees no reason to have to prop himself up. There's no insecurity in him that makes him feel the need to try to be open about being better than anyone else. He knows and accepts what he's worth without feeling the need to tell people about it.

If someone asked him what he thought of himself/his own worth, yeah, he'd admit his skill and capability without being too humble, but he also wouldn't go overboard with it or say it during instances that don't really warrant it (basically, if absolutely nobody asked, he'd say it anyway in PoR. In RD he doesn't really seem to give a shit anymore about letting the whole world know how good he is). He's lost the whole pick me, look at me sort of attitude. Imo it's also due to a higher amount of respect he has for himself now, and a much healthier one. He doesn't care about being the best anymore (he'd be perfectly happy if Rolf was instead) and is just satisfied knowing his skill on his own. He's satisfied not being alive just to survive, but to be with this mercenary group and actually able to live.

As a side note, we never actually see him having drunk or in the middle of drinking in RD, so... it's also likely he's worked on his possible PoR drinking issue too!

All in all, he's just one of the few non-main characters who came a whole long way with a full story. He feels very different in RD, but not so much that he feels like a different character entirely. For me, I can feel the growth in who he is, and that to me is an excellent handling of a character. When I can feel how different they are from beginning to end, I can feel the intent of character growth behind it. I can't tell you with certainty that the writers took a liking to him and so biasly kept sticking in dialogue for him (and singlehandedly made him one of the solidly best units in RD, for that matter...), but he's definitely repeatedly present and has hefty, story/backstory littered implications.

His dialogue feels meaningful to his own personal story in all his conversations. In other words, he doesn't have a conversation that feels devoid of meaning. It comes across more as all of his content exists for a reason/has meaning behind it. There's no wasted dialogue with him. When he's there, it means something for his character (comparatively to other side characters who may have lengthy conversations but you walk away having gotten nothing out of it, be that in PoR and/or RD).

He has fewer supports than most of the cast in PoR, but every single one had some kind of direction to it. Even if you look at his C support with Janaff and go "well that's just classic early PoR Shinon", the point of that is exactly that: that he starts out who we recognize and develops from there. That support alone goes from that to a lot of growth in three conversations, and beneficially so on both sides.

Simply put, he has more content the average Tellius character (including all of his boss quotes in chapter 18), and everything leads up to who he is by this conversation. It's a full story for a side character, later including personalized support dialogue for A supports, and he just happens to exhibit a lot of growth and traits that I already lean toward (hence why he was in my top spot all along, just tied with others. Now he's not tied with others and has the top spot to himself!).

I think it's likely it's the fact that as mentioned, none of his conversations are throwaway conversations. You never walk away from his conversations having gotten nothing (I mean, I'm sure people who refuse to see it don't notice precisely because they are willing themselves to refuse to see it to find excuses to keep hating him). Even in his first RD base conversation, the fact that he acts as you'd expect but drops a "laguz" in there is already a hint for his growth direction on top of being there at all. It's really just up from there, as is the case with all his content.

I tend to lean toward characters with a whole fountain of insightful conversations and depth, and in FE games you often don't find those characters outside of the mains. While I'd argue Tellius is a lot less tropey than modern FE (there were some tropey types like Makalov and Ilyana whose characters are basically nothing without their tropes), a lot of its side characters are still reduced to very surface level characterization with no real growth.

Shinon was very lucky to get as much as he did, and I'd say he has just as much if not more personal depth and lore than even some of the mains themselves. Imo he's a very lucky and rare find in FE games, when there are so many goddamn characters that the writers can't flesh them all out (reasonably of course, but it makes it even more special when it happens for non mains). Even with the Fodlan games and all its content, a lot if not most of its characters are full on tropes with little to nothing in the way of anything else. Engage suffers from it too, with a few diamonds in the rough and not much else.

That's not to say I hate the games or their characters, because obviously I would not still be playing new titles to the franchise if I hated it. I'm saying it makes the ones with as much depth as Shinon a gold mine to be found amidst a very large cast of characters that don't usually get that treatment.

anyway i will always talk abt shinon more when able so this is Not The End but i will end this post here lest it turns into another 20+ paragraphs.

[paladin-of-nerd-fandom65]

It’s ok, the questions & I ain’t going anywhere lol take as long as you need ;)

1: since they both love DBZ, what is their fusion name? (Since they’re fans, I can see them doing the fusion dance, acting like dorks :p )

2: speaking of dragon ball, what type of “busters” are they, both together & separate? (City buster, continent buster, galaxy buster, etc)

3: do they compare themselves to other best friends in media? Like SpongeBob & Patrick, goku & krillin, etc

4: in a previous post you made, mar’i & Jake loves to roughhouse, how do they roughhouse? (like armbars, wrapping legs together and tickling the feet, etc) & who would win in a friendly wrestling match between them & Chris in a free for all?

5: similar to the toliet humor in the previous ask, what’s the reaction to seeing nutshots, in cartoons, live action movies, and maybe in real life too?

6: what’s mar’i’s outfit? I can see her wearing a pink or purple version of the Robin or Nightwing suit.

7: not really a question but a story idea; based on the comic book: The death of Clark Kent & villain of the story Conduit. A bully or a “distant” friend of Jake is on the same basketball team but usually sucks compared to Jake himself, & gets emotionally abused at home by his father (why can’t you be good as Jake, you’re such a disappointment, etc) after days of being abused and being second best, the bully/friend “somehow” develops powers similar to Jake’s (probably was born to absorb energy and was a late bloomer like Jake) & wants revenge and make his parent(s) proud. If you read the story the death of Clark Kent you know what happens after. sorry for the long paragraph lol

Thanks for the answers for the past few months when I first started asking question, love the character headcanons & stuff. You can take a few days break if you want to.

Thanks for being patient my friend @gothicghost2000 . It’s very appreciated :-D

1. Ah yes, the Duo have two main candidates for a fusion name: SkyWing Or PhantomBird. Now as for combining their first names for a fusion, I see them coming up with “Chrayson’ or ‘Lor-And’r’. The latter ironically being translated as ‘Phantom Fire’

2. Chris at his base strength and power alone can easily be a city buster in terms of power level. At a maximum input of his base power, that increases to a continent buster. Then though you factor in the Nightwing entity. When about 15% of its maximum potential, it can be easily be a planet buster. At its above all maximum level and all restrictions are off, a fully powered and charged up Chris Kent with the Nightwing Entity reaches to an outright Galaxy buster level.

Then we get to Jake. If his Tamaranean strength and power is tapped into and his emotions running high, at 50%, he can be considered a city buster. At a 100% power level, Jake is capable of leveling entire mountain ranges across the continent. Though what makes Jake’s unique Tamaranean power something to watch out for is its unending ability to increase its maximum potential as he grows older. So if he’s a mountain buster at merely 10 years old, only X’hal can imagine how much he can bust at maximum once he’s 12

Now regarding them together, Chris obviously takes most of the power level count compared to his best friend but that doesn’t mean Jake is completely underneath Chris just by power level difference. Now matter the gap, they are teammates and best friends above all else which is what really matters.

3. The Duo mainly compare themselves to Gumball and Darwin Watterson from the titular Amazing World of Gumball and for good reason as their respective personalities can match up well enough with those two. While Chris is a lot brighter in his outlook and definitely less likely to jerkish moment as Gumball, both are known to have days of absolutely being so done with the way their bad luck ruins their day and they aren’t shy from sarcastic moments. Then there’s both Darwin and Jake, two guys who strive only for what they want being the best for everyone they care about. They stick by their respective best friends on their adventures and generally have a deep bind with said friends few people when their families can truly appreciate.

4. Really if anything, roughhousing is coded for Sibling tickle fights. Mar’i knows all of Jake’s most sensitive and favorite spots to scribble her fingers all across which get him bursting into uncontrollable blissful laughter every single time. And yes, her most common target one some nights when she playfully wants to tire out her baby brother are his feet, especially since they’re always sockless. Though Jake playfully in turn fights back with his own hands scribbling on his big sister’s own spots which get her laughing as well.

Now if there’s actually play wrestling involved and it’s between Chris, Mar’i and Jake, try as the boys might, Mar’i triumphs for certain with her ability to withstand most of the play holds the Duo can get in her and often waiting for her chance to strike after Chris and Jake go for play grappling each other.

5. The Duo cringe and wince so hard once the crunch is made, and both shield each other’s eyes. Sure Jake can resort to nutshots during superhero battles but even he internally winces as it’s always of the most painful things any man can endure.

6. Well….as once drawn here by our ever so lovely friend @spider-jaysart , I can for see a younger Mar’i dressing like this as Nightstar

As for that suggestion though, I can see it as a prototype Nightstar suit Jake made for her which while she certainly appreciated it, she prefers something more in line with her their Mother suits up

7. 😲

OooooooO….A new idea for a rouge for the Duo I see. I’ll look into this story and Ill see more of what you mean but I like it a lot already. Heck canonically in New Order, one of Jake’s school teammates was actual the nephew of Dr Light so him having a classmate that’s either super-powered or linked to someone with superpowers isn’t far fetched what so ever. I feel a lot of Flash Thompson tones with this idea for a rival/rouge for Skybird XD

[bellysoupset]

SOUP‼️‼️ RAHHH THIS FIC THO😭😭😭 i cannot explain to you how excited i was about this one AND GOSH IT WAS SO FREAKING AMAZING AS ALWAYSSSS 😩 you’re so freaking talented bro the POWER your writing and your OCs have over me is INSANE i think i’m hyperfixated on them bc i’ve been rereading so many of your old fics but i’ve also been daydreaming about your OCs like everyday when i walk to class djcvnfdvndfjvnsfjv sorry if thats weird gosh i just love them so much ahhhh <3333

wen’s parents are so awful ugh but also in such a particular way?? like the way they were just so emotionally distant and then managed to bombard poor vin w so many awkward questions while remaining kinda respectful? but they were also so passive aggressive the whole time?? like i started side eyeing them from the start when they were introducing themselves😤 but also this passive aggressiveness + the distant (too) formal vibes they gave off is so fitting given the backstory you gave for wendy a while ago!!! like it made so much sense!! OH and omg the AUDACITY to ask vince about immigration and then saying “legally?” like MA’AM???????? and AGH the way he kept trying to ignore how bad he was feeling and the way he kept trying to impress them and omfg how upset he was when he was in the bathroom like the TEARS goshhhh i can’t 😭 he was so miserable and omg THE TOWEL and then wen being so careful and respectful and SWEET like baby girl is so freaking PRECIOUS i love her sm 😭😭😭😭

and then vince bringing up the ED and wen just telling him everything 😩🫶🏽 even the attempt omfg SOB i wanna hug little wen and tell her she’s so loved and nothing’s wrong w her bc baby was HURTING ��� PLS AND THEN THE “you’re a football player, Vince, i was expecting to get hate crimed” SHE WAS SO REAL FOR THAT KANCJSJSJDJWJWB 💀 and AYEEE the end was ADORABLEEEEE

ALSO going back to the parents, i was SO curious as to how you were gonna approach her relationship with them!! like i didn’t know if you were gonna make her be super “submissive” i guess or more outspoken and i honestly LOVED the way you wrote her in this context‼️ like clearly quieter and less outspoken/goofy/bubbly than she normally is, but still very much herself. like it didn’t seem like she was letting the comments get to her too much? and the way she called her mom out whenever she asked that insane question!!!!! and not caring about her parent’s reactions/thoughts after what happened and literally just worried/concerned about vin!!! just focusing on calling the car and getting the fuck outta there!!!!! like YAS that’s my girl and ESPECIALLY given all her backstory i’m SO PROUD OF HER and her growth and how much healing she’s done to get to where she is now😭🫶🏽

THANKS FOR MAKING ME FEEL SO MANY FEELINGS WITH YOUR WRITING❤️‍🩹 you’re insanely talented and i will never stop saying it‼️🫶🏽

🦦

Otter, I can never answer to your comments except for just staring at them in awe. Please never change, these gotta be half the reason I write nowadays.

I know Wendy is your girl and I was sooo nervous about the backstory fic, so I'm happy all the emotional beats came through!

I like to imagine Wendy's parents don't see themselves as bad people and, worst of all, they really wouldn't come across as bad people on paper! Which made Wendy sound very "complaining just to complain" during her teen years, because what do you mean your parents suck?

I really enjoyed working through their mundane shade of being sucky people. And man, pooor Vince!! He's such a stronghold, I broke my own heart making him cry.

And LOL at the "hate crimed" comment, I had that line written since I decided I was gonna pair up Wendy/Vin. I think I wrote and rewrote a fic multiple times where she worried about him being a transphobe or not, but eventually I scrapped it all. Glad I could save the line! I imagine it took some prodding from Jonah, vouching for Vince, to actually get them together. Not that Jon will ever own up to it.

!! Finally, eternally happy to have you commenting on these fics, you caught up on all of Wendy's little tells, on how she's outgrown her parents and she's like "over them". I feel so blessed to have people so invested in these characters 😭

Have THE best day Otter!

[dicmondskies]

☆ & * .   ♡   I N T R O D U C T I O N  …

[          ◟  KAY. ◝           ]     ⸻     have  you  ever  heard  20 something  by sza ,  well  it  is PARIS SAZUKI  to  a  tee  .  the tarot reader and metaphysical store owner at the black cat has  been  spotted  wandering  down  portobello  road  markets  just  last  sunday  ,  do  you  know  them  ?  would  you  say  they  are more  emotionally intelligent  or  more  sensitive  ?anyway  ,  they  remind  me  of  lavender fields, an ancestral altar full of crystals from around the world, herbal teas when sick, essential oil diffusers in every room, incense to keep bad energy away  ,  maybe  you’ll  catch  them  around  yeah ?     ⸻     [          ◟  KAYLEE BRYANT. ◝           ]  

PARIS SUZUKI is the first born in the suzuki family. being the eldest girl has always had a much deeper and heavier meaning to her life. as the first born, she realized from a young age that she wasn’t the same as the family that surrounded her. naturally she’s always had a gift for seeing the truth of things, being able to observe a situation, family dynamic, environment, etc. and knowing exactly what needs to be brought to light for improvement. she was shown grim truths about her toxic family dynamics as she matured over the years. older adults called her an empath, she’d line all of her stuffed animals up, convinced they were alive and had feelings, talked to imaginary friends, and knew when bad things were about to happen, she even started having prophetic dreams as her link to the spiritual world strengthened with age. sometimes, she’d just KNOW things, and didn’t know why. with a strict cultural upbringing, these feelings and ‘knowings’ were highly discouraged, so much so that her parents nearly scared her of herself, of the feelings she was experiencing that were so confusing and making others seem afraid of her. she eventually learned to block it out, ignore it, only talk about it to trusted peers which were few, even the kids in school sensed something special about her, in return she was sort of a timid, isolated child who wanted nothing more than the opposite. her younger brothers were always popular and well liked, which made her feel more like something was wrong with her.

☆ &*— high school

when she was 15, p’s parents went through a really rough patch, there were rumors that got back to paris that her dad was having an affair, and when she asked her mom about the rumors she was told to stay out of adult business. she witnessed a lot of her dad doing whatever he wanted and watching her mom tolerate it and look the other way due to the fact he was the sole bread winner,  as she aged into her teenage years, paris became more rebellious. she was still the same kind, genuine, lover girl she’d always been but at home she was cold and distant, she’d rack up after school activities and clubs to keep herself away from home, she started making more friends and coming out of her shell, suddenly people payed her more attention and that’s when she met her first girl crush. when she was 16 she fell in love with her high school best friend, the girl who lived across the street, she had just moved to the neighborhood and sat next to paris on the bus her first morning. this was the moment paris’s repressed “hey, maybe i’m into girls.” feelings bubbled back into the forefront of her mind. she identifies as pansexual in current time.

paris was way too shy and way too unsure of herself to ever tell her best friend how she really felt about her, though the two were inseparable and never left each others side, if you saw paris you saw her and vice versa. it didn’t take long for her father to catch on and he was nothing short of unhappy. paris was sent to a private school across town just to keep the two apart, it was a real life romeo and Juliette situation going on, and it got so bad that paris’s father went as far as to move to a new city, just to keep her daughter away from the girl she loved. eventually, paris’s first love couldn’t take the rejection from paris’s parents any longer, she just couldn’t handle the drama, the intensity of their forbiden love, it was when they were 17 that it all ended and the two slowly drifted apart and stopped speaking all together. this was her first heartbreak, and fueled her anger towards her parents, especially her father.

paris turned her villain era up a notch, she did a huge 180 on her aesthetics, slashed fishnets, berry red vamp lipstick, and a septum piercing were the first major turn arounds in her appearance, she started to love being her most authentic self regardless of how her parents reacted, she dug deep into her psyche and healed some of the darkest parts of her that were still hurt and traumatized, her inner child. suddenly, it felt good to piss her parents off, she stopped craving the validation and acceptance and realized everything she could ever need was already within herself, and if her parents or anyone didn’t like who she was, then it was their loss and not her responsibility to change their minds.

☆ &*— young adult life

slowly but surely she started to find herself and explore her 20′s with nothing but self love in mind. it was on her self love journey that she stumbled into crystals, tarot, spirituality, herbs, etc. and most importantly when history came back around to repeat itself. she met her current best friend through her spiritual journey and surprise, surprise, she’s found herself having feelings for her but she’s afraid that the past will repeat itself, so she hasn’t come clean about it yet. when she started getting into being spiritual instead of religious, she started to tap back into the psychic gifts she had when she was younger. she started trusting her intuition and meditating and learned to connect with her intuition out of love instead of fear. while in college for marine biology, she slowly started doing tarot readings for people anywhere she could on campus, and eventually she started doing lives on tik tok, the more her talent and clientele grew, the more she realized this was her path, she dropped out right before she was about to get her masters and started an online tarot & crystal business. she can tell you all about crystals and makes handmade crystal jewelry like rings, necklaces, and bracelets and knows what each crystal means and how it functions. she has an ancestral altar set up in her apartment in her spare room that serves as her safe space, decorated with crystals, her altar, bean bags, bongs, live plants, a mini library, a diy cloud wall and a galaxy sky light, it’s the vibes room and resembles what the inside of a fairy cottage might look like, usually where she goes to be alone or release her negative thoughts and feelings.

from 2020-2022 her crystal business online grew extremely popular at a fast rate, she started doing readings and selling crystals at festivals and other vendor events and that helped spread her business and connected her to networking opportunities to keep growing bigger, after working hard and building her reputation and business from the ground up, she opened up her first physical store front on the oceanfront january 2021, so it’s been almost two years that it’s up and running and you can find things like incense, dried herbs, tarot decks, crystals, crystal jewelry, handmade soaps & bath products, aura photo booths, aromatherapy, handmade candles, teas, and herbal pre-rolls, you can also get tarot readings from her there as well as from other tarot readers, psychics, and astrologers who rent the space to do personal readings!

her fathers dirt has come back to haunt her as his child of an affair has surfaced and set off the beginning stages of her parents divorce. her new sibling is interested in getting to know her but they are very skeptical and stressed about the entire thing, basically she’s been avoiding it but trying to be polite as possible.

☆ &*— random facts & tidbits

[ i actually read astrology charts for a living so some of these fun facts will be based on her astrological chart, yes sorry i am THEE astrology whore unfortunately ]

she is a libra sun, cancer moon, scorpio rising. having the sun in libra gives her a mediator touch to almost every situation. she can see things from all sides and angles. this has given her a bit of a people pleaser personality but over time she has learned about setting boundaries with others and putting herself and wellbeing first. she is all about harmony, beauty, and love. she prefers to be in a relationship rather than to be single and sometimes that can turn into a co-dependency problem, something she’s self aware of so she is in the process of trying to heal that wound and be more mindful of the kinds of relationships and people she lets into her life. venus is the ruler of the sign libra, this makes people born under this sun sign perceived as charming, sociable, but sometimes perceived as fake because they are usually always trying to keep the peace in situations, they find a way to make everyone in the room happy but sometimes they end up compromising themselves. libra is an air sign and therefore communication is key in their lives, they communicate in a diplomatic way and are often thought as mediators or advocates, air signs are sociable and this combination of air and venus influence is why libra’s usually have to come to terms at some point in their lives that they can’t and won’t be liked by everybody, they have a bad habit of letting someone not like them send them into a spiral. libra is also a sign connected to justice and the justice card in tarot, they are great human rights advocates or advocates for the underdog.

her venus sign is in the sign of scorpio. this makes her a very intense, passionate, and loyal lover. people born while venus is in scorpio have no interest in superficial or shallow kinds of relationships, they want deep, intimate, and meaningful connections with the people they allow in their life but often end up feeling very lonely due to the fact that people are disappointing and are bound to let you down sometime. scorpio venus finds the beauty in the darkness, and they have many transformations through love, they aren’t afraid of people who have a rough past or have been through trauma, on the con side, this can attract dark partners who can be obsessive, controlling, manipulative, on the pro side this can attract partners who have a respect for the darker things in life, are passionate, intimate, and worthy of merging souls. scorpio venus learn lessons about trust, loyalty, and letting go, often times they have to let go of many people who are not healthy for them, and spark change in that persons life for the better, leaving them to pick up the pieces and rise from the ashes.

her rising sign is in the sign of scorpio as well, the rising sign represents your appearance, personality, and overall theme of your life, this means she lives a very scorpio themed life full of death and rebirth cycles, learning lessons about letting go, control, and transformation. scorpio risings are constantly evolving, they are said to be truth seers and often shine light on the darkness that others don’t see so obviously, they can see through situations and pick up on hidden things, the unsaid, the unseen, they read in between the lines, and are the kinds of people you would want to hire as a private investigator, nothing slips past a scorpio rising, they have incredible skill of diving to the depths of the human psyche and they often have a rough life impacted by some sort of life changing trauma or themes of trauma that they are meant to overcome and evolve and transform from, this makes them very deep people, they feel at an extreme intensity level, everything is 20x more deep to a scorpio placement

her cancer moon gives her a very nurturing and motherly energy, she loves to care for her loved ones and is the ‘mom friend’ in her friend group. cancer is a sign that is ruled by the moon, therefore it is connected to femininity (in energetic terms not m/f) the mother, intuition, the womb, and cycles. this gives her a very sharp and strong intuition and even sometimes prophetic dreams, things she dreams about will happen in real life, even if it’s something minor or seemingly unimportant. cancer is sign about family and she’s been dreaming and planning out her wedding future children names since she was seven, she was totally the ‘i want a prince to sweep me off my feet’ kind of girl growing up. cancer placements especially cancer moons are also very emotionally intelligent as well, she is very good at tending to the emotional needs of others but has to be careful and set boundaries or else she gets drained and will take on the emotions and problems of others in a way that isn’t good for her mental health. she is a total crier, she doesn’t care where she is, if she has to cry she will shed tears and not care if it makes other people uncomfortable, she’s the kind of girl to cry over a romantic gum commercial or a minor sad scene in a film. she loves to stay home and take a warm bubble bath, crawl under her blankets and binge watch her favorite tv series, she’s more of a stay in at home kind of girl than a go out to parties or clubs. she loves comfort and food, especially baking!

[atryoshka]

ok just finished my s6 rewatch (also rewatched the 2nd half of s5 bc im still feeling insane) AND NOW I CAN FINALLY WATCH THE AVAILABLE S7 EPISODES

i initially stopped watching after s6 bc that ending was such a joke so i wasnt planning on seeing s7 anytime soon unless there was a good reason (WHICH THERE IS NOW LOL). Was just gonna wait for it to finish airing and see if there were any buddie crumbs with no expectation of fox having the balls to make them canon fr.

After seeing the bi buck kiss scene that I came across on twt, I've been avoiding s7 spoilers so I can watch the new eps with fresh eyes.

All I know is some vague stuff like the name of the guy is tommy, apparently he's a good friend of eddie and buck feels left out, and something about a heart circled on a calendar?? Idk the details (ive been quickly scrolling past unfamiliar gifsets and s7 episode tags lmao) so im really excited to see everything in context and watching how this all plays out.

a quick rant since im all refreshed from the mini rewatch

It's honestly so wild to see how far this show has come. I didn't even know it switched from fox to abc until after the kiss spoilers were everywhere so im extra hype to see how that will make a difference in the relationship dynamics.

With fox, the emotional scenes with the high stake rescues, character drama, and team dynamics were always good, but when it came to Buck and Eddie's romantic relationships with women, it started feeling really forced and out of place the longer the show went on.

And in a noticeably odd homophobic way too.

It gave the vibe of just pairing them with women they either, didn't have much chemistry with, or with who they were not on the same emotional wavelength just to have them in a relationship with a woman. I never liked how rushed and cringy the meet-cute's felt, or the huge emotional disconnect while they spoke about being in love. Like it never felt like they were actually in love with who they were seeing.

Eddie dating out of obligation, family/peer pressure, or for Chris' sake to the point he feels like it's all a performance, never being able to truly trust/open up emotionally to any of them, overthinking, being so emotionally distant and critical, he ends up sabotaging the relationship anyway. Buck dating and having sex with just about any girl who shows him even a scrap of care regardless of compatibility bc he desperately wants to be accepted and validate his existence, wearing his huge heart on his sleeve, being too much too soon, molding himself into whoever he thinks they expect him to be, and eventually watching them walk away after clinging too hard.

It was honestly baffling to see when the relationship buddie had with each other clearly overshadowed what was going on with w.e girlfriend they had at the time. They were effortlessly meeting each other's emotional needs so well that the women they dated essentially ended up feeling like afterthoughts. Everything you'd expect they'd get from a healthy romantic relationship with the women they were paired with, including the ups and downs of an engaging romantic development, they instead got with each other.

It was to the point that I legit thought fox was trolling us in s6 with Marisol and Natalia.

On that note, I will say that Eddie's eventual choice to take a chance on Marisol felt slightly more organic than buck's choice to date Natalia with their non-existent chemistry, but it still felt really out of place.

Bobby was literally just telling Eddie how he wasn't looking for anything with Athena at first, how their relationship developed naturally from her offering him emotional support during a low point, to him inviting her to church to pray, to eventually taking her to dinner after they clicked. Then, we have Bobby comparing that to how Eddie got with Shannon at 14 in a similar light, emphasizing that Eddie wasn't trying to "make it happen" either.

But that's what makes Eddie asking Marisol out like he did so strange.

Like yeah, it did sort of fit in the theme of just "letting it happen" naturally, but since it was compared to how Eddie got with Shannon like it was a positive thing (which given their history of getting married bc she got pregnant, ending with resentment on both sides, it really wasn't) the parallel falls flat. Earlier in the season, Chim even called out how unromantic Eddie's proposal to Shannon was, like it was nothing, and the others even poke fun at him not even being the one to pursue her in the first place, like he didn't care either way.

So after all that, it almost feels like he's dating Marisol just bc he happened to run into her at the hardware store and she gave him a DIY recommendation with a smile. Because next thing you know, he's suddenly agonizing for days about asking her out on a date? What?? Why?? The emotional disconnect between how Bobby and Athena got together and Eddie just deciding to date her bc she's nice, even though there was no kind of emotional build up, had me reeling.

And don't even get me started on the second hand embarrassment I felt watching how Buck and Natalia started to date. It really did feel like a joke with the whole "she sees me" thing when there was literally nothing about their interactions to indicate that was true at all. Like how can anyone take that seriously after the kind of shallow conversations they had? Especially after they showed her walking out on Buck after barely scarping the surface of what his chaotic life entailed.

Even when she came back to apologize, it felt hollow since nothing in how she reacted to Buck's chaotic life changed from the last time she was there, she still looked ready to run again while simply handing over a towel and calling an ambulance so Buck could help deliver a baby. Buck seemed even more stressed after she showed up and it was like pulling teeth to get her to help him, even saying that he's just doing his job.

Honestly, nothing against her because it's completely valid for her to feel overwhelmed by everything she was thrown into. She barely knows him and there's already so much to unpack about his life. She came into this bc a cute guy with an interesting story about being stuck by lightning asked her out and she was intrigued, which is completely fair. But the point I'm trying to make is that they just aren't compatible, and she was/is not remotely ready to take that all on. I could def write a whole analysis on that if anyone wants but writing it all here would end up as 5000 word essay lmao

But getting back on track, I've been watching 911 since s3 started airing and fox's confusing writing for Buck and Eddie's female love interests always rubbed me the wrong way. It stood out even more esp since the other m/f relationships like Chim/Maddie and Bobby/Athena were written with so much care and believable development. Unless fox was planning the best kind of endgame slowburn by writing buddie's other romantic relationships to be so severely lacking in order to highlight how compatible buddie is in comparison (highly doubtful since it's fox) it really made no sense.

So yeah, abc taking over and already making changes that properly reflect buck's journey of self discovery, taking into account how experiences shaped him, and showing his emotional development has me shaking in relief and excitement!! Gonna start s7e1 now!

BI BUCK AND BUDDIE DRAMA HERE I COME

im shaking

like im just sitting here with watery eyes and staring in disbelief

it really happened after all this time

idk what to do with myself rn lmao like im so tempted to rewatch the whole series from the start again like a madwoman

might just go from s6 for now and save the full rewatch for after this season airs but godddddd im just???

BUCK IS BI

[erodasfishtacos]

Cheating!h blurb where ana asks why they dont have sex or at a party and she’s trying to pull him into a room and y/n watching him try to make excuses and then next time having sex with y/n he says anna keeps trying and she has the pride he doesnt give in... or something exploring that situation

warnings: smut, cheating, angst

“Anna, I just-“ Harry huffs as she tugs him into a spare bedroom of the party after he had put up a valiant fight to keep them in the main area.

Her hands are unbuttoning his already barely buttoned shirt, running down his bare skin, and he is cut off by a sloppy kiss to his mouth.

Fear shoots up through him, it’s not YN, he doesn’t want this with her.

“C’mon, it’s been almost six months and you still haven’t touched me. Just fuck me,” Anna complains, fed up with the lack of or more like nonexsistence of their sex life.

It was near impossible to believe, someone like Harry who oozed sex out of every pore of his body wasn’t sexually active or interested in fucking his girlfriend.

When Anna takes a different approach of going for his belt buckle, mouth trailing against his collarbone, and attempting to get to his groin - which hadn’t hardened in the slightest.

“Enough,” Harry states firmly, grasping her wrists lightly and making her look at him, “I don’t want to have sex right now, okay?”

His girlfriend’s face falters, “You never want to.”

“If you don’t like it break up with me,” He hisses, knowing YN is going to get suspicious the longer they’re in a room together.

Anna, who really did have a kind heart, frowns, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pressure you into anything. I would never force you to.”

Harry just rebuttons his shirt, “S’fine. Let’s just get back to the party and have a good time, yeah?”

She nods as Harry swings his arm around her shoulder, unlocking the door, and pausing when he sees YN a bit of the ways down the corridor - staring at the two leaving the bedroom.

“I’m going to get a drink,” He dismisses bluntly, his focus set on the girl who was visible angry with him in the kitchen.

Before he can get out a word, she steps forward and swipes her thumb against his collarbone.

It comes back with the waxy substance of Anna’s bright mauve lipstick.

“Have fun in there, did you?” YN asks, she tries to keep her tone cool and unbothered by Harry sees right through it to the insecurity.

“You know I didn’t,” He replies between gritted teeth, how could she get jealous when this was all her?

He didn’t want a girlfriend.

Well he did but he only want her and she fucking knew that.

“If you wanted me to believe you, maybe you would have wiped her lipstick marks from your neck and chest,” She chuckles and it makes Harry’s hair on the back of his neck stand up.

It was the distinct chuckle and tone she used when she was upset but wasn’t going to admit it over her dead body.

Before he can call her out, she shoulders past him, disappearing into the dancing crowd of people and out of his side.

“Fuck,” He mutters, running a hand through his hair before trudging off to find Niall and Zayn - to distract himself.

-

“Stay the night, please?” Anna asks softly when Harry pulls up to her small, quaint little house that fit her perfectly.

“M’sorry. I have a long day tomorrow.”

It was a lie. It was rarer that he told the truth to his girlfriend than fibbing.

“So? Let’s cuddle, do something,” She begs, frustrated with her emotionally and sometimes physically distant boyfriend.

Harry shakes his head, “Maybe next weekend.”

He always said that.

It never happened.

—

As soon as he drops off Anna, his next stop is a route that is ingrained in his head front and backwards, her apartment.

He has a key, doesn’t bother knocking and just barges into the dimly lit house with her shoes tossed clumsily on the floor - almost trips.

When he finds her, she’s in a towel - freshly showered, and brushing through her hair in her small walk-in closet.

She heard him come in, knew he was storming in here, and still didn’t turn around when he slammed open her bedroom door.

He’s crowding behind her, knocking the brush out of her hand, and pinning her to the wall, “You’re so bloody ridiculous. You jealous little brat.”

YN doesn’t respond, her body still wound tight with tension and a gluttonous feeling of rage for earlier in the night.

“Been fuckin’ you and only you since I was seventeen. Y’know that I didn’t fuck her, didn’t even touch her and you still have the nerve to act like a crybaby,” Harry seethes, his whole chest pressed against her back, no room to escape.

“Her lipstick was all over you,” She argues back weakly when his hands come to the knot in her towel, teasing at unraveling.

“Yeah because she was begging me to fuck her and I said ‘no’ so she tried to get in my pants and I pushed her off.”

“Why?” YN murmurs, quiet in the small space.

“You fuckin’ know why,” Harry growls with his teeth grazing across her bare shoulder blade.

“Say it.”

“I pushed her off ‘cause you’re the only person I’ve fucked since I was seventeen. My cock is yours,” He rasps, untying the knot and letting the towel drop.

He wishes she would just end all this bullshit.

Let him have her fully and completely but she was so fucking afraid of getting hurt when it wouldn’t happen.

“Go on, tell me who owns this cunt,” Harry demands, hand tucking between her thick thighs to cup her puffy mound in his hand.

“H,” She whimpers as his finger lightly slides up the wet groove of her center with a careful drag.

When she doesn’t give him the answer he wants, he gives her clit a hard pinch, “Don’t make me repeat myself.”

“Yours, fuck - it’s yours,” YN huffs at the slight but welcome pain on her nerves - relaxing when it returns to soft strokes.

“Anna is pretty, y’know? Had her on me, kissing my neck, unbuttoning my shirt and shit,” Harry hums against her ear, two fingers sinking into the tight heat of her body.

He continues, “Didn’t even get hard when that happened. That’s how fucking trained I am for you. What a tight fucking leash you have me on.”

YN turns a bit into putty at his words, insecurity slow flooding out of her body, and feeling more like how she usually does.

“How do y’ever forget? How much I love you?” He asks in true disbelief, it literally oozes through his pores how much he adores his high school sweetheart.

“Don’t-“ She squeaks desperately.

“Why won’t you let me tell you how much I love you, baby?”

His voice like dark, sweet honey that seeps into her every nerve-ending and makes her feel lethargic, in a boneless silky way.

“Stop plea- Just touch me,” YN begs when his fingers crook into against her plushy, tight walls with focused strokes.

“You need to admit it, y’stubborn little thing. I know how in love you are with me,” Harry pushes, needing to hear validation from his favorite person on this earth.

He squats down, spreading her cheeks, and leaning in to lick from the top of clit all the way back to her other entrance.

His large palms keeping her apart, digging into the thick skin until his fingers are white - tongue finding her core and darting in to her most sensitive area.

“H, oh my god,” YN moans, head falling forward against the wall, pushing her hips backward into his mouth.

“Darling, c’mon. Show me how sweet y’can be f’me,” Harry goads encouragingly, it always took a little bit of effort to get her to break.

“I love you….s’much,” She whispers, voice cracking on the last syllable as he rewards her with a suckling kiss to her clit and slips his fingers back in.

“I know y’do, baby. You know I’d never give it to anyone but you,” Harry coos, anything to get her to soften her harsh edges, chip away at her stone wall.

Her hand reaches behind to weave through his hair, her stomach sucking in harshly as she feels her tight band snap as she releases.

“O-oh, you’re mine. Y’mine,” His love chants as she rides out her intense wave of her orgasm as he helps her through it.

“M’yours,” Harry agrees immediately, standing up and a smile breaks on his face when she turns around and wraps him into a hug.

“I love you. I know you didn’t touch her. I just hate it,” YN murmurs softly, undoing his shirt and sliding it off of his shoulders.

His smile fades at her words, “Then make it stop. The minute you tell me you’re ready to make this work, I’ll break up with her.”

“I’m no-not ready,” She stammers, eyes widening like a deer in headlights at his words.

So afraid. So fucking scared.

“Okay, okay,” He soothes when he sees her chest start to rise faster and faster with anxiety.

He doesn’t want to drop it.

He wants to shake her and ask her how the fuck she doesn’t see that they’re already in a relationship and she’s being blinded by irrational fears.

Harry waddles them over to her messy bed, pushing her back and adjusting until she’s in the center - staring at him with doe eyes.

He loves her so much it hurts to look at her for too long.

When he tugs off his jeans, taking his phone out to put on the side table - he sees an unread text from Anna.

I’m sorry about earlier. I really want to make it work with you. You’re a great guy x

Harry should feel bad. Maybe his stomach should have dropped or something at how awful he’s being to that girl.

But when his love is splayed out, pliant and malleable for him, he can’t find an ounce of fucks to give as he tosses it on the bedside table.

He had been in love with this girl since he was sixteen, never fell out of it, he was addicted to her - willing to go through all this bullshit if it meant he had her.

It always felt like the first time, crawling on top of her, and bending down to pull her puffy lips into a strong kiss as he slides in, always a pleasant stretch.

As they move together, in a familiar rhythm, she murmurs against his lips, “One day, I’ll be ready.”

“Please, make it soon, darlin’,” Harry pleas, swallowing harshly before pushing his emotions into hard, deep thrusts.

[thatpiscesfish]

Hey, could you give me your opinion on my placements please?🥺

Aquarius sun (5th house), aries moon (8th house), virgo rising, aquarius mercury (6th house), pisces venus (7th house), scorpio mars (3rd house).

Thank u so much, have a nice day!!

Sure! So Aquarius suns are modern, charming, but distant. They kinda live in their own world but are somehow still aware of everyone else. And very aware of the wider issues going on in the world. A common criticism of Aquarius suns is their ability to care so much about people they don’t know that are suffering across the world, and yet it’s hard for them to show a lot of emotion to people they’re close to. But I think the key word is show. I think Aquarius suns really do care about everyone obviously including close friends/family. But I think Aquarius energy doesn’t like to seem vulnerable and out of control/too emotional; it’s important to remember that Aquarius is co-ruled by Saturn, so they’re still very mindful and disciplined and in control.

Sun in the 5th is at home (ruled by Leo) so it’s actually a good placement for the sun. Usually playful and youthful, they love having fun and being around lighthearted people. Have positive mentalities and like to do fun things like hobbies/going out etc. It’s interesting cause this house (Leo energy) is the opposite of your sun (Aquarius) so I feel like it lightens the Aquarius energy a bit more which is cool.

Aries moon is fiery and determined. You have conflicting energies with Aries being ruled by mars and it being in the moon, so it’s kinda opposite and there’s this push and pull. So it’s a softer side of Aries but a much tougher side of the moon. It gives the moon this raw energy and drive. But it also shows Aries as more delicate and vulnerable. So it’s an interesting combination.

Moon in the 8th is added mars energy since it’s ruled by Scorpio. Feeling emotionally safe and powerful when being in control/being able to figure things out. 8th house energy is deep and inquisitive. Simple things and small talk don’t excite them like figuring out how people/the universe work.

Virgo rising is observant and introverted. Can be perfectionists and hyper critical but usually have good intentions. They just wanna feel wanted and enough so they do the absolute most to make people need them. Comes off kinda reserved but very put together if developed. Can be prone to anxiety cause of all that mercury energy.

Aquarius mercury is inquisitive and sharp minded. Can be kinda nosy lmao but just cause they’re smart and they need a lot of information. Simple answers aren’t enough especially if they suspect there’s more to the story. Interested in unusual subjects, things people don’t always talk about. Could be interested in politics/society/humanity/environment.

Mercury in the 6th is at home and exalted in the house of Virgo. Adds even more curiosity and sharpness to the mind. Can use their mind in their daily lives a lot, like for jobs or routines they do. Could have jobs involved in writing/editing/solving things. Even sales and communications, radio etc. Could be prone to anxiety and being way to critical of themselves and others. More introverted energy where thoughts and opinions are internalised and not expressed a lot.

Pisces venus is exalted and actually a really powerful placement if managed well. Pisces hates rules and wants to feel limitless and boundless. No boundaries. And with venus, this manifests in terms of love. Things can get blurry and it’s easy for Pisces venus to lose themselves in their relationships with others if underdeveloped. They want to give so much and do so so genuinely that they kinda forget about what they’re getting in return. And if it’s not much (or not equal to what they’re giving out), they’ll probably realise this too late when they’re already in too deep. And Pisces gets swept up easily because they’re guided by their emotions. But a very thoughtful, sweet and caring placement.

Venus in the 7th is at home so similar themes are magnified. Relationships are very important and come naturally. Could have issues with independence and staying alone. Craves balance and equality in a relationship. But also something traditional and romantic.

Scorpio mars is at home so this is a strong placement. Like Aries, Scorpio is strong, assertive, dominant, and determined. But Scorpio is water and fixed, so much more introverted and relaxed than Aries. Takes their time and lets things simmer while they think about their next move. Could attract but also intimidate others easily.

Mars in the 3rd is more verbally expressive. Could use words more than physical body during a fight. Could say things that are hurtful when angry. Or blurt things out easily. Could be more confident talking to someone than touching. Opinionated and straightforward. Likes to debate and exchange ideas.

Overall, a nice mix of elements and modes. Someone analytical and logical but also guided by their emotions. Sorry this was so late but you’re welcome! Hope you have a nice day too!

[aminiatureworld]

Distance

Characters: Childe, Kaeya, gn!reader

Word Count: 4,280

Warnings: Swearing

Premise: What other explanation could there be? Surely this is the one logical answer. Even if it hurts, even if it doesn’t make sense.

In which the reader’s s/o assumes the reader is no longer interested.

Author’s Note: This prompt is really fun to write so far but I feel terrible torturing the poor characters like this. Oops.

Childe

The warm wind tickled Childe’s hair, causing the Harbinger to bat a few orange strands out of his face, eyes still pinned on the harbor that was fast approaching. The balmy breeze of Liyue was refreshing – a reminder of all the things he had been missing on his long-drawn-out trip. Now Childe leaned against the railing of the ship, eager to touch land, unable to contain the excitement he felt at the knowledge of what was awaiting him upon the dock.

Though he didn’t like to admit it this trip had been a particularly harrowing one, not just for Childe but for you as well. The post was notoriously touch-and-go across the Seven nations, especially with the deep snows whirling into Snezhnaya this time of year. The fact that he was gone almost a month certainly didn’t help. If he had to admit it Childe had found himself worrying about the time more than usual, worried how it might affect you. Now he was eager to push all those thoughts away, to once more find himself next to you, all well with the world. As the crew bustled around him to prepare the junk for docking the Harbinger took a deep breath in. There was nothing to worry about. Soon all would be well.

The empty dock was a jarring sight. Though saying it was devoid of people wouldn’t technically be accurate, business was going on as usual after all, to Childe it might as well have been a ghost town. Stumbling slightly, suddenly unsure of where to go, Childe climbed up the ramp awkwardly. Finding no one waiting for him on the stone pier as well, anxiety began to coil in Childe’s stomach. Had something happened? Ignoring the thoughts that flurried through his mind he quickly wove his way through the streets of Liyue. Though the city was bustling as always, laughter and shouting echoing through the air as people haggled and joked and went about their business, Childe found himself disconnected from his surroundings. His only thought was to find you, hopefully safe and sound and happy to see him.

There was no sign of anything wrong as Childe approached the door to your shared apartment. Sighing softly he dug around in his pack for the keys. You’d probably just fallen asleep, having recently taken up the habit of afternoon naps, according to your letters. Childe couldn’t really complain if that were the case, after all rest was important and you could hardly be blamed for not being aware of the time while conked out. Yes, surely you were asleep. Then Childe could give you the surprise of waking next to him. A smirk graced Childe’s lips at the thought of it, and as he turned the key in the lock he reassured himself. There was nothing to be worried about.

Unfortunately the Harbinger’s genius hypothesis had proven to be a false one. A quick scouring of the apartment revealed that you were not there, and no signs of any abnormal activity could be found as an explanation. Anxiety seeping into Childe’s mind he barely set down his pack before bolting out of the door, trying somewhat unconvincingly to keep his pace to a fast walk. Had something happened to you? Surely not! Childe knew you, knew that you could very well take care of yourself. He shouldn’t worry.

Still the thought passed through his head, combined with an even more unpleasant one. Had you simply forgotten about him? What if you didn’t care? Shaking his head the Harbinger took in a deep breath. He was overthinking things, still stuck in the mindset of a Harbinger. Not everything in life was a battle, hadn’t you told him that many times, teasing his constant need to see an obstacle to beat somewhere? He really should take your advice more seriously, at least in this case. Slowly down slightly Childe walked to the city center. He was sure his answer would be here; and that it would be so mundane as to not bother a second thought.

His pulse jumped in his throat as you finally entered his field of vision. You were sitting around with a few people, coworkers if the Guild crest and weaponry didn’t serve him wrong, chatting and smiling and overall having a wonderful time. Emotions stirred through Childe, the urge to run up to you, to stalk away, to find the nearest fountain and jump into it; but he stayed put, staring at your laughing face, pain flashing in his chest. He supposed he should’ve felt angry, felt like he’d been stood up. Instead all he felt was sadness, sadness and guilt.

Finally turning around Childe plodded back down the street, steps slow and sluggish. What did he expect really, for you to wait around for him forever? How was that fair? There was no reason you shouldn’t grow sick of waiting, shouldn’t want more out of your life. You were perfectly within your rights to want such a thing. Yet the pain continued, spreading throughout his chest until Childe felt like his lungs were on fire and his throat was crumpled in a fist of his own making.

Arriving back at the apartment a supernatural urge seemed to seize the Harbinger. Pack, he needed to pack. He wouldn’t burden you anymore, wouldn’t continue to strain your emotions by hanging around like a phantom. Luckily Childe wasn’t the kind of person to own a lot of things. Not that you really were either, between the both of you purchases mainly went into gifts for each other rather than personal buys. Childe now stood looking down at some of the things you’d bought or made for him. Scarves, books, a stuffed animal that had reminded you of his Delusion; all of these things lay peacefully on the shelf, giving the books behind them a slightly trapped looked. It was so homey and so comforting that Childe found tears pooling at the corners of his eyes.

Wiping his eyes roughly the Harbinger collapsed onto the couch. What was he doing? Part of him wondered if he shouldn’t just wait for you to come home, wait and see where you two really were. But it seemed unfair to do that. After all, what kind of sleazy person left their partner for a month then begged for their love and attention right after coming home? It was completely within your rights to want more, hadn’t Childe already made that clear to himself? And yet it hurt, it hurt so much. How had he managed to mess this all up, to let the thing most precious to him fall out of his hands? He had been so careless.

Giving himself up to his emotions Childe let the pooling tears stream down his cheeks. Suddenly everything seemed so very heavy. Closing his eyes for a moment Childe sighed. Five minutes, he would give himself five minutes before returning to his packing. Yet the familiar comfort of the couch beckoned to him, and soon fatigue overwhelmed him, dragging him down into the realm of sleep. Thankfully, he dreamt of nothing.

“Childe what are you doing?!”

Lurching up Childe glanced around wildly, hands automatically moving to summon his weapon. For a few seconds he found himself utterly confused, unable to comprehend where he was or what was going on. Soon enough however, the situation came crashing back to him and the Harbinger lowered his weapon. Glancing up at you he braced himself for whatever was going to happen next.

Well you certainly seemed upset, though not exactly in the way Childe might have expected. Instead of anger there seemed something more akin to panic in your eyes, and the red patches on your face certainly pointed to distress more than anything else.

“Is something wrong?”

“Is something wrong, you tell me that!” You took in a few erratic breaths, but your tone remained panicky. “Why are you packing? Do you have another trip? Why are you leaving?”

“I, I thought that it would be easier if I just left.” Childe lowered his head, unable to look you in the eyes. “I figured that I would spare you the pain of having to kick me out yourself.”

“Why in Teyvat would I kick you out?” You sat down on the couch next to Childe, and he could feel your eyes piercing through him. “What’s going on?”

“I didn’t see you at the docks when I returned.” Childe paused, gathering his thoughts. “At first I thought that you’d just fallen asleep or something but you weren’t home. And when I saw you out with your friends, well it made me realize how distant I’ve really been; physically, emotionally, everything. I realized that, and I realized that you deserved better, that I hadn’t been doing enough. I realized that you deserve more, deserve a partner who will always be there for you, who you won’t always have to be waiting for.”

“Oh Ajax.” You whispered softly.

Raising his head Childe could see no relief in your expression. Instead sadness was plainly plastered upon your face. Reaching out your hands you let Childe slump against you, carding your fingers through his hair as he rested his head on your shoulder.

“I’m sorry my darling, I thought you were coming back tomorrow. That’s why I was out. I would never think such a thing as abandoning you,” you spoke softly, tone achingly soft, “I mean it. Our relationship isn’t conventional, that’s true; but I would never trade it for anything. I would never think that you weren’t giving enough, I know how hard you work and how much you put into everything you know. Believe me Ajax, I don’t begrudge you any distance, I’ve never lacked love from you.”

“But what if one day you want something more,” Childe couldn’t help but ask, “what if one day letters aren’t enough? What if one day, what if one day I’m not enough?”

“I promise that will never happen,” you let out a soft sigh, “really Ajax you hold yourself too cheaply. You shouldn’t underestimate yourself, or underestimate me for that matter. You will always be enough for me. There will never be a day I want anything or anyone different, and if need be I will remind you of that every. single. day.”

Punctuation the last three words with kisses to Childe’s head you smiled as he titled his face up to gaze into yours. Though the panic had evaporated from you there was still sadness, and for a moment Childe felt guilt wash over him, guilt that he had caused you so many trials and that he hadn’t even had the courage to face you about it.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. Although I do appreciate you understanding that almost stealing out into the night nearly gave me a heart attack.”

“Not my brightest moment.” Childe admitted.

“Perhaps not,” you laughed, “I mean really, you’d think that it was the second act of a tragedy or something, and not one I’d like to participate in.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize! Just don’t do it again, or next time I’ll get genuinely angry, and then you won’t get off the hook so easily.”

Childe pressed his lips to yours, another unspoken apology. Though you let out a small huff of impatience you nevertheless leaned into the kiss, smiling against his lips as you let your hands drift from his hair to his shoulders.

That night Childe lay awake, listening to the soft cadence of your breath, indulging in the feeling of peace that lay over him. Though he knew that his worries and insecurities would never truly leave him, Childe nonetheless felt as if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. Maybe one days his fears would come true, maybe one day this life wouldn’t be enough. But “ifs” and “maybes” weren’t guarantees, and until that day happened Childe would cherish the time he spent with you.

Besides, Childe trusted no one as much as he trusted you. If you said that such a day would never come to pass, then surely you were right.

  Kaeya

You were working late again.

Kaeya supposed that it shouldn’t have bothered him, but then again he also supposed that almost anyone would feel somewhat uneasy if their colleague and partner was suddenly avoiding them like the plague.

Okay, maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration, but not much in Kaeya’s mind. Of course, if this were some sort of habit then he would hardly mind; but after months of making it a tradition to always walk home together, well, safe to say the whole thing didn’t sit well. Nor was it simply a matter of you staying to work late, even the days where you finished earlier than him it seemed that you were always dashing off somewhere, leaving him painfully out of the loop.

Now Kaeya stood across the room from you, fingers drumming on his arm, face carefully hiding the irritation and concern that rose up inside him, threatening to spill over.

“I’m really sorry Kaeya!” Your tone was sincere, and the apology in your eyes seemed genuine enough. “It’s just that Jean asked me to look over the ledgers for the infantry. You know the captain is out this week, but Jean didn’t want to have to owe the City and the soldiers in terms of late funds. I promise it won’t take that long, I’ll be done as fast as I can.”

“Why don’t I help you with it?” Kaeya could feel the sarcasm sweetening his tone, attempted to rein it in he stared at you silently.

“You’ve been working so hard, I wouldn’t want to bother you with extra work.”

“It wouldn’t be a bother at all. Anything for my dear partner.”

“Really, it’s fine!” You twisted your hands, a nervous habit that Kaeya had long ago picked up on. “I’ll be done in time for dinner. And then we can the new recipe you’ve been telling me about; okay?”

“Very well.”

“Thanks for understanding!”

Though you seemed happy enough by the proposition Kaeya noticed how fast your head moved to the papers on your desk. Closing the door behind him he heard you let out a loud sigh. Clenching his hands, as if to remind himself that he was still in a semi-public setting, Kaeya stalked out of the Knight’s Headquarters. The thoughts in his head felt like static, and he worried that if he remained still for one more moment it would swallow him up.

Walking the streets of Mondstadt, Kaeya tried to reflect back upon the past few weeks. Had he done something wrong? Wracking his brain for any serious disputes Kaeya came up frustratingly emptyhanded. If you had fought over something this whole debacle would be one thing. Kaeya had a temper of his own, and petty acts of anger was something he admittedly struggled with often enough. He could hardly fault you if you acted in a similar way, or at least not without admitting to his own faults.

And yet nothing had happened, nothing that might cause such a dispute. Clenching his hands one more, aware that his knuckles must’ve been bone white, Kaeya let his thoughts drift to darker waters. What if you were just sick of him? It was certainly plausible, or at least Kaeya thought so. It would certainly explain why you now seemed to be avoiding him like the plague outside of work.

The thought hurt, as it might well do, but surprisingly most of the pain didn’t come from the idea itself, but from the idea that you wouldn’t tell him such a thing. You falling out of love with Kaeya would be been incredibly painful. You not trusting him enough to the point you were simply avoiding him, well the thought was enough to knock the wind out of him. Did you really think so ill of him? The idea filled Kaeya with smoldering rage and indignation – fueled in no little part by the fact that Kaeya ultimately might agree with you. Usually thoughts like those were the kinds you hated, the kinds you chased away with a stick, assuring Kaeya that no matter his past decisions he was still worthwhile. But you weren’t here now, and those dark thoughts were now kindling for the fire that burned in Kaeya’s mind.

By the time he’d reached the apartment Kaeya was almost sure of his hypothesis. Though a small part of his brain reminded him that he was working of a diet of sleep deprivation and anger, such logical thinking was easy enough to shrug off. After all, the signs were there. You were evidently getting quite sick of him, it was hardly Kaeya’s fault that he caught on.

Throwing his equipment on the floor, not bothering to even put his sword up on its stand, the Cavalry Captain walked towards the kitchen. What he needed was drink, maybe even two. Really if it were up to him he’d spend the next hour or so getting as drunk as possible before passing out in the tub. Thankfully though his reason hadn’t completely left him, and Kaeya managed to limit himself to two and a half glasses of cider. He needed to be at least on the side of sober for the conversation that was bound to pass once you came home after all.

The lateness of the hour in which you arrived felt like a personal insult, though really it was only 21:00 or so.

“Kaeya?” You called out, whipping the Cavalry Captain out of his thoughts.

Stepping into the kitchen the grin on your face was a stark contrast to the emotions that swirled in Kaeya’s mind. Hands clasped behind your back you stood in the doorframe as if expecting something. You’d probably be in for a nasty surprise. Kaeya smiled sweetly at you, words burning in his mouth, mixing with the alcohol. This was a bad idea.

“How was the paperwork?”

“The paperwork? Oh! It was boring enough I suppose. I kept getting distracted though, I really should’ve had you there, you could’ve kept me from nodding off.”

“I’m sure I would have. Tell me something my dear, I have a question that’s been burning in my mind.”

“Yes?”

“Tell me why it is that out lovely Acting Grandmaster asked you to go over the ledgers when I was assigned to that exact thing yesterday?”

Ignoring the blotches of red that immediately spread across your cheeks Kaeya stood up. Carefully going to clean the glass he’d been using he stared into the sink, not trusting himself to look at you. If he did all the words he wanted to say would fly out at once, and something that probably shouldn’t be said with them.

“Did she ask you that? How odd! She must’ve wanted a second pair of eyes or something, I guess.”

“Are my eyes not good enough?”

“Kaeya, you know I wasn’t insulting your work.” A sort of shocked irritation ran through your voice. “You’re the best knight in Mondstadt after all.”

“Oh really? Well if you think so highly of me then why have you been avoiding me so much?”

“I haven’t been avoiding you.”

“Then let me ask a different question; when was the last time we walked home together?”

“I don’t know, a week and a half ago?”

“Try two and a half.” Kaeya finally turned around, drumming his fingers on the counter. “Why are you avoiding me?”

“I’m not avoiding you!” Indignation shot through your words as you shook your head. “I’m just busy recently.”

“Busy with made up work.”

“It’s not made up!”

“Oh really, then tell me what was your work last night?”

“I had to oil the bow strings for my regiment.”

“They couldn’t do it themselves according to protocol?”

“Not the new recruits they couldn’t!”

“Then what about the day before?”

“Kaeya!” You finally burst out. “I don’t know why you’re so quick to find fault with me right now! Just tell me what you’re getting at, if you’re going to insult me you might as well do it head on.”

A part of him admired you for wanting to look at the problem right in the face, another part of him thought of how well you knew him, how attuned you were to his moods. Just as he had figured out that you were avoiding him, so could you tell that his jabs were a misdirection. It was almost funny really, seeing the things you both had picked up about one another now used at the end.

“Fine.” Kaeya crossed his arms, hoping his expression was at least somewhat neutral. “It seems obvious to me that you’ve been avoiding me, and that you no longer want my company. What I am getting at is the fact that you want to break up, and that you evidently trust me so little with that fact that the only solution you’ve come up with is to avoid me.”

Your face went slack with shock, pupils turning to pinpricks as you stumbled backwards. Finally letting your arms fall to your sides you grabbed the side of the doorframe, as if unable to process what he just come out of your partner’s mouth.

“What?”

“Do you really trust me so little?” Kaeya pressed on, feeling his emotions begin to spill over. “Am I really so untrustworthy that you can’t even tell me you want to end things? Am I, am I really that untrustworthy?”

Everything seemed to be going all wrong. Kaeya had expected you to immediately fess up, had expected guilt and relief and then the end. Instead all he got was incredulous silence, incredulous silence and a look that screamed utter and total disbelief.

“Do you really think that I would do that to you?”

The question was a simple enough one, one that anyone might ask during a conversation of this nature. Still your tone was so dispassionate that Kaeya couldn’t help but pause. Did he really think that you would do such a thing? His anger certainly thought so, helped a great deal by his current buzzed state. All that aside however, did he really think that? When he woke up tomorrow, would these thoughts still be swirling through his head, these angry thoughts that threatened to burn through his happiness.

“I don’t know.” It was the best answer he could give.

“Then why would you accuse me of something you weren’t even sure of?”

“I…”

“Kaeya have you really thought so little about what you just told me?”

He almost wanted to apologize for how stupid his words seemed in retrospect.

“Would it help you if I told you where I actually was?”

Your voice was still quiet, but not entirely closed. Nodding stiffly Kaeya felt his fingers still.

“Very well. You were right about one thing, I wasn’t actually checking the ledgers for Jean; and I wasn’t oiling bowstrings all day either, I mean our troops should know how to do that at least. But you made one mistake in your judgement Kaeya, the idea that I was avoiding you. In truth I was gathering materials, I wanted to make a new sword for you. Your current one is so brittle and since I know you don’t want to use the sword you were given as an heirloom, well I thought that I wouldn’t wait for your current one to break and that your new one would be a present.”

“…I see.”

It was all Kaeya could get out; how else could he reply? Shame and guilt mingled within his mind, quickly dousing any anger that he might’ve felt. He really fucked up this one didn’t he. He let his emotions slip once more and now he had made a fool of himself. More than that he had refused to trust you, had ended up doing the exact thing he had just accused you of. Now what was there to do? He couldn’t exactly slink away with his dignity; even if he had managed to retain that, there weren’t many places to go.

“I’m sorry.”

“What?”

Kaeya jerked his head up from the spot he’d been examining on the floor, confused by the sudden turn of the conversation. You stared into his eyes, shrugging slightly.

“I said I’m sorry. I’m sorry Kaeya, I should’ve come up with a better method. I didn’t mean to make you worried, or to make you feel like I wanted to no longer associate with you. Believe me that’s the last thing I want to do. So I’m sorry that I made you feel that way.”

“I was the one who accused you of all those things that weren’t true.”

“You did. I’m not very happy about that to be honest; you’re going to be doing some serious penance for the next week. I just figured that before that I would apologize. Then we could be even. Okay?”

Reaching out your hand Kaeya finally noticed what you’d been hiding. The windwheel aster was slightly limp, the breeze that gave it its beauty nowhere to be found. Nevertheless it seemed at the moment the most beautiful flower in the world. Walking over to you Kaeya tentatively took the flower in his hand. Smiling softly he leaned down to kiss you.

“I’m sorry.”

Tomorrow he’d start making it up to you. Tomorrow he wouldn’t listen to his demons, wouldn’t let his own lack of self-worth hurt you. Tomorrow he would do better by you and more. Today he would say sorry.

After all, he had plenty of time.

[daylighteclipsed]

I didn’t mean for this to come across as negative to Tifa’s character. I’m sorry if I did. I’m quite new to FF, but I know the fans can be… intense. And that Tifa gets a lot of flack.

I agree, it’s a complicated situation. And I love it because of that haha. My impression was not that Cloud was completely disinterested in hearing about Emilio but that he doesn’t share the level of interest Tifa seems to be hoping for. He reacts to the knowledge that Emilio is alive, which prompts Tifa to keep going, but beyond that… Well, he doesn’t really care. And he’s not sure what to say. (I’ve seen people point out that he visibly relaxes a bit when Tifa brings up that Emilio has a girlfriend; he was getting jealous lol) What intrigues me here is that Tifa still tells this story even if Cloud says he doesn’t remember Emilio. She can’t expect him to react much to her story if she has to tell him who this guy is first, but she still seems to. I don’t think it’s a conscious intention, because she acknowledges at the start of this game that she and Cloud did not hang out much despite being next door neighbors. I think it’s connected to her trauma — how Cloud is her only living constant (atp) connection to the past — and how much she’s missed him since they were kids. Since he left the village but also before that too, since he emotionally pulled away from her and they stopped being close like when they were little. I think they’ve both always missed each other and never realized that the other always missed them too. They want to reconnect so much, but it’s difficult, at first, when they’re not quite on the same page about where they left off — emotionally and literally since Cloud’s memories are literally wrong.

That’s not to say Tifa was not also hoping for Cloud to be more excited to hear that someone else survived the massacre that wiped out their home and everyone else they knew/loved — even if that someone is Emilio, someone Cloud resents. I just don’t think that was the ONLY thing going on here. Much like Aerith, and like Cloud, there seem to be some subconscious feelings from Tifa influencing her behavior because of the trauma and grief she’s endured. Either way, this scene tells us that Cloud and Tifa do not really know each other that well starting out. Tifa knows Cloud never got along with Emilio, but in this scene she does not know that Cloud resents Emilio or why he would — because she doesn’t remember what truly happened the day she fell off the bridge on Mt. Nibel until later. I like that Cloud and Tifa start out distant because it makes watching them grow back together stronger than before the more they understand each other and the past so satisfying.

While Aerith is looking for Zack in Cloud and subconsciously, I think, expecting Cloud to respond to her like Zack, I do think that Tifa also, initially, has her own false expectations about Cloud. Not in the sense that she’s subconsciously expecting him to act like someone else — Tifa is never not looking for Cloud in Cloud. But in the sense that it seems like, initially, Tifa’s subconsciously expecting Cloud to act like he’s a closer friend to her than he is.

Tifa’s hurt at the start of Rebirth when it seems like Cloud’s choosing not to tell her where he’s been for the past five years. She’s hurt by his distrust and doubt that she’s real, and she tells him that maybe she shouldn’t have been so glad to have him back — a callback to Remake when she tells him she’s really glad to have him back the first time Cloud starts dropping his facade (“losing that hard edge”) and shows that he remembers the promise he made to her as kids. Tifa keeps trying to reconnect with Cloud by trying to jog his memory, but it doesn’t work that well. This arguably comes to a head in the Under Junon inn. Tifa and Cloud have a chance to talk privately again and apologize for their words before. But then Tifa brings up Emilio and, regardless of whether you have Cloud answer that he remembers Emilio or not, she launches into a story about seeing Emilio again. And you can hear her growing excited as she speaks, almost like she forgets Cloud was not friends with Emilio, was not friends with her friends growing up, until she notices that Cloud is standing there awkwardly and she realizes… She does not have the old friend in Cloud that she thought she did.

Cloud and Tifa were close when they were very little, but that was a very long time ago. They didn’t hang out as adolescents. Cloud is willing to listen to Tifa’s story because he cares about her — and this is another callback to that same scene in Remake I mentioned before when Cloud first loses his facade; he says if Tifa wants to talk, he’s listening — but he has no personal investment in this story about Emilio. And it’s like Tifa realizes then that she’s got their connection wrong… She’s been trying to jog Cloud’s memory to rekindle a close friendship that never exactly existed. She’s been expecting Cloud to act like her close friend when they were never really that close to begin with — or at least, they haven’t been that close since they were 7-8 years old. That’s not fair to him.

Noticeably, Tifa lets this expectation go, which enables Cloud and Tifa to bond and reconnect organically (and much more successfully) instead. They grow very close when they’re not expected to already be close. And idk I think it’s interesting.

[pinkteapotwriting]

hi!

I was wondering if you could write a smut with period sex with marauders? If you are not comfortable with that I totally understand and I’m sorry to make you feel bad :/

Marauders x fem!reader

Warning : Period sex, fingering, daddy usage, petnames

Word count : 1435

I hope you like it love *mwah*

---

It had been one of those weeks. You were feeling really low, and you took to isolating yourself. Politely declining to spend time with your loving boyfriends and taking some time for yourself. In other words isolating yourself completely. But now, now you were completely overwhelmed with the need for them. It was ridiculous honestly, and you weren’t sure why your emotions were all over the place. Now you had to swallow your pride and go apologize for being so distant with the men you loved.

Knocking on the door to their dormitory was much harder than it should have been, but you had to bury your shame and embarrassment to apologize. When the door opened you were met by a confused James. 

“Bunny? You know you don’t have to knock right? What’s wrong?”

You just stepped in and hugged his middle, instantly his arms were around you and rubbing your back in soothing circles. James cast his bewildered expression to Sirius and Remus but was met with a mere shrug. They didn’t know what was going on either. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

James separated from you and grasped your shoulders to stop you from falling into his chest again.

“Y/N, you’re scaring us. You’ve been distant all week and now you’re here crying and apologizing. What’s going on?”

Maybe you weren’t going about this in the right way. You grabbed his hand and led him to the bed. Remus had been resting against Sirius’s chest reading a book, but now the book was discarded and all eyes were on you as you sat cross legged at the foot of the bed.

Sirius intertwined his fingers across Remus’s stomach, resting on top of Remus’s hands as well.

“Tell us what’s happening love.”

“I’ve just been really sad this week and I don’t know why. I came to apologize for distancing myself and hoping you’d forgive me. I don’t even know what happened and I want to work harder at communicating instead of shying away.”

They all sighed in relief. Remus collapsed dramatically against Sirius, arms splayed out on either side of him.

“Jesus fuck, I thought you were going to break up with us.”

“No no no no no, I’m so sorry I made you think that. I love you all so much.”

James reached out with his arm and pulled you towards him, kissing the top of your head. The affection had you melting, and gravitating towards him without even realizing. You weren’t even aware of the process of crawling into his lap, and pulling him in for a kiss. But you were very aware of his large hands roaming your body. He smiled a cocky grin after pulling away, probably because your chest was heaving. He traced your lips with his forefinger. 

“Hey lads, how long has it been since Y/N has been touched, depending on if she followed our rules?” 

Sirius’s smile matched James now.

“Bout a week.”

“Oh poor thing.” Despite his words Remus didn’t sound that sympathetic. 

Their tones and unreadable expressions were making you much more aware of your desperation, of your need for them. You furrowed your eyebrows at the realization. 

“Oh bunny, don’t fret.” James' words did not have you any less worried. ”We can fix that for you, you’ve just got to do something for us first.”

It was ridiculous how fast they could turn you into puddy in their hands. James guided you off of his lap and moved up to whisper in Sirius’s ear, Sirius then whispered in Remus’s ear, which left you alone at the foot of the bed, emotionally and sexually frustrated.

Then suddenly they were side by side leaning against the headboard, staring at you expectantly. They were lined up in this order from left to right, James, Sirius and Remus. Sirius patted his thigh and beckoned you over with two fingers and you knew he meant business. So you crawled and straddled his thigh.

“What am I supposed to do?” Remus gave you your answer.

“Just move back and forth love.”

“Couldn’t we just-”

“No.” James' tone hardened.

You looked to Remus, but he just shook his head.

“Left us alone pup; we missed you. Now we just want to take our time.”

Sirius placed his hands on your waist and squeezed gently.

“Do you want me to help you bubs? Want Daddy to help you get off on his thigh?”

You were going to just nod, but the continuation of James stern facial expression made you know it was ideal to give a verbal answer.

“Yes please daddy.”

“Alright baby, just like this, remember?”

He led you back and forth against his thigh, catching your clothed clit at just the right angle. James grabbed hold of the hem of your shirt.

“Can I take this off, darling?”

“Please.”

James just stared at your chest in a trance, not realizing he was completely zoned out. 

“I think Prongs likes what he sees,” Sirius snickered. 

James elbowed Sirius in the ribs.

“Course I do, she’s beautiful.”

You whimpered.

“Pretty girl, you like being praised huh? Look at how wet it makes you, look at Sirius’s thigh. Oh.”

Oh? What was that about, now you were concerned. 

“What’s wrong Jamie?”

“Well-”

Remus held up a hand.

“Y/N, you know how I get kind of distant, emotional and irritable before a full moon?”

“Yeah? I don’t see what that has to do with- oh no!”

Sirius’s pants weren’t just stained with your arousal, oh no. Now you understood exactly why you had been feeling so low this week. Stupid fucking uterus. 

“Sirius oh my god I am so sorry!”

You tried to climb off of him, but his hands held firm.

“Don’t be sorry it’s okay.”

“Sirius let me go, I’ve gotta change.”

“Just a little longer please, you were so close and cumming will make you feel better.”

“O-okay.”

Remus quickly got up to grab a towel, and offered you his hand so you could freshen up in the bathroom. You came out wearing nothing now. James met you halfway and interlaced his fingers with yours.

“So pretty darling. C’mon lie back on the bed now.”

Sirius had changed his pants, and Remus sat against the headboard with a towel between his legs. It was intimidating spreading your legs for Sirius and James, but resting against Remus’s strong chest made it more bearable. Besides, once James had his fingers inside you, your embarrassment quickly subsided. Sirius was holding your hand now as James worked to pull an orgasm from you.

“That feel good pup? I’m sorry we didn’t keep a better track of things, but rest assured we’re gonna take such good care of you this week baby.”

You just nodded as pleasure took you to a different headspace, one where you could cast away all inhibitions in exchange for the three capable men who would make sure you were taken care of. 

Remus cupped your breasts; the feeling of his large hands brushing against your erect nipples only added to your bliss. And then, oh and then, Sirius rested his hand against your abdomen, situating himself perfectly so his thumb could lightly circle your clit.

The symphony of your moans were accompanied with the many praises of your adoring boys, anything to remove the possibility of embarrassment of the crimson towel below you. 

“So pretty love.”

“Fuck, being so good for us hmm?”

“You close love?”

They had missed you so much this week, and they really just wanted to make you feel good.

“I’m- I’m gonna.”

Sirius kissed the back of the hand he was holding while quickening his pace with the other.

“Come on love, we’ve got you. Let go for us.”

Any built up stress that was accumulated through that weak had suddenly dissolved. All you could do was sigh in relief when James and Sirius pulled their fingers from you, finally feeling at rest. God you loved them. But then James had a cheeky grin.

“You know Y/N, your cycle is basically lined up with Remus’s now. Does that mean Remus will be pmsing soon too?”

Remus’s hand collided with James' chest so quickly that it wasn’t the force of the impact that made James fall off the bed, but the shock of the speed. 

You could only giggle.

How did you manage to spend a week apart from them?

You’d try your best to avoid that in the future.

You watched Remus pull James in for a kiss by the collar of his shirt.

Yep, definitely wanted to avoid doing that again.

---

@sunny-bunnny @quindolyn @accioweaslcy @weasleyposts @bluemoonyblurbs @emmaev  @agalandhermarvelobsession

[gunterfan1992]

Episode Review: ‘Together Again’ (Distant Lands, Ep. 3)

Airdate: May 20, 2021

Story by: Jack Pendarvis, Kate Tsang, Hanna K. Nyström, Christina Catucci, Jesse Moynihan, Adam Muto

Storyboarded by: Hanna K. Nyström, Anna Syvertsson, Iggy Craig, Maya Petersen, Serena Wu

Directed by: Miki Brewster (supervising), Sandra Lee (art)

Across Adventure Time’s ten season run, the show explored a bevy of “mature” themes and story ideas—topics, like love, sexuality, depression, and grieving. The show also touched upon death, but the emphasis was usually placed on the emotional toll of a loved one dying, not really what happens when you die. We knew there were Dead Worlds and Death. We knew that there was reincarnation. But how does it all fit together? What does it mean? How does it work?

With “Together Again,” we finally have many of the answers.

This special opens with a marvelous fake-out episode simply called “Finn & Jake,” that sees the two steal a magical cartoon of 50-flavor ice cream before rescuing Turtle Princess and LSP from the clutches of the villainous Ice King. This is all deliberately anachronistic and over the top. Ice King is back to his season one ways, Finn has both arms, and he is still wielding his golden sword that he lost in season two’s “The Real You.” There’s lolrandom dialogue and silly monsters; it’s like a parody of seasons 1-2. But then, this adventure starts to get all wonky, and in time Finn realizes that he is in a some sort of trance or illusion: one that ends with Jake being buried in the ground. Suddenly, Finn awakens from his reverie. He’s an old man. And he’s dead. We’re then presented with a new title card that lets us know the episode is actually called “Finn & Jake Are Dead.”

Holy Glob! They actually went there.

Turns out Jake died years before Finn, so naturally Finn is super excited to see his best bud. But something’s wrong—he cannot find Jake!! They planned to spend eternity together. But all that Finn can find is his very own psychopomp, Mr. Fox (voiced by Tom Herpich, whose purposefully stilted line readings are the epitome of delightful). Finn rightfully assumes that Jake is in a different Dead World, and so, being the ball of spunk and energy that he is, he demands to meet with Death, only to discover that there’s a New Death in town (voiced by Chris Fleming). The episode eventually explains that New Death was the son of Death and Life, and after New Death killed his father, he became the sovereign of the afterlife. New Death hates his job and decides to just blow up all the Dead Worlds so he doesn’t have to deal with it all. (I won’t get too much into the details here, because there would be a lot of story to parse out.)

Finn soon learns that Jake has reached nirvana in the 50th Dead World, where there is nothing but peace and serenity. Finn nevertheless tracks down Jake, pulls him from paradise, but in doing so, accidentally lets New Death in, who promptly obliterates Elysium, sending all the enlightened souls—including those from different levels of the afterlife—to the 1st Dead World. This gronks up the afterlife, temporarily halting the reincarnation process.

Well, Finn and Jake are rightfully ticked, and so they haunt the material plane looking for Princess Bubblegum. She’s not home (more on that later), but Peppermint Butler is! After Ghost Finn and Ghost Jake explain the situation, Peppermint Butler tells them what to do: They need to find Life and explain the situation. The duo manage just that, and Life is rightfully angry that her kid has stopped the transmigration of souls. After Life gives Finn a McGuffin sword that can hurt Death, Finn and Jake return to his abode. A brawl ensues wherein we learn that New Death has been possessed… by none other than that spirit of the Lich.

That’s right, it’s the Lich! He’s back, and boy is he evil.

The Lich explains that by possessing Death, he can destroy the afterlife, thereby destroying a key aspect of reality. Naturally, Finn and Jake are not cool with this, and they engage in combat. After Mr. Fox grabs the McGuffin sword and uses it to annihilate the Lich and New Death, he is proclaimed the New New Death and sets everything right. Finn is slated to be reincarnated, and Jake is slated to return to the 50th Dead World where he and Finn will one day be reunited. As Finn is pulled into the wheel of souls, Jake suddenly decides to go back with Finn, too, “Just for fun.” The episode ends with a card letting us know that the episode is neither called “Finn & Jake” nor “Finn & Jake Are Dead.” Instead, it is “Finn and Jake Are Together Again.”

As they say, “And there wasn’t a dry eye in the place.”

If you were to tell me several years ago that the last episode to star Finn and Jake would revolve around them dying, I think I would’ve been upset. Not simply sad, but rather frustrated because “they all died” can feel like a cheap ending. But with “Together Again,” it all works. And a large reason that it works is because the show goes all in with their ideas. Finn and Jake don’t magically leap back into their old life (no, no, they very much do bite the dust). Instead, the special emphasizes the cyclical nature of life through the transmigration of souls. The episode ends with a beautiful scene of Finn and Jake, bound together as soul-brothers, being reborn into a new, mysterious (possibly Ooo 1000+?) world. It’s both aesthetically and emotionally pleasing; it doesn’t feel off the way over finales might. This is right. This is the way life works. “Round and round as nature goes,” and all that jazz.

I loved the series explanation of how death works. It seems that souls land in a specific Dead World, where they ‘marinate’ for a bit, presumably being rewarded or punished based on their life in our meat reality. After a time, they are then reborn. This process repeats, with each soul reaching higher and higher levels of enlightenment until they hit nirvana, which is the 50th Dead World. So in a sense, Adventure Time has a roughly Buddhist cosmology with a dash of Greco-Roman mythos thrown in for flavor. (As to what happens after a soul stays in the 50th Dead World for a long period is anyone’s guess, but I’d speculate that when all the souls in the multiverse have been purified and land in the 50th Dead World, they will all collapse into one another and form one perfect Monad. Perhaps this is the sphere of perfection that the beings who merged into Matthew thought they were connecting to? Who knows! It’s anyone’s guess!) I was a little disappointed that we didn’t get to see who Death, Prismo, Life, etc.’s boss was, but perhaps that’s a mystery better left up to the imagination!

One minor thing that I loved about this special was the number of characters who made cameos as well as all the callbacks that were made to previous episodes. Regarding the former: Finn and Jake’s canine family show up (including the oft-forgotten Jermaine!), as do Tree Trunks and her myriad husbands. Tiffany plays a major role in all these shenanigans as a “death cop” of all things. There is a delightful rogues gallery stuck in the 1st Dead World (including, among others, Maja, Sharon from “The Gut Grinder,” and Wyatt). In the 50th we find Ghost Princess and Clarence happily at peace next to Booshy, the weird spirit mentioned in the Pen Ward classic “High Strangeness.” As far as callbacks go, perhaps my favorite is the clap (from “James Baxter the Horse”) that Jake taught to Finn in case they ever do get separated in the afterlife. And of course, there are myriad references made to “Death in Bloom,” the episode that planted the seed for what this would grow into.

Going into the special suspecting that it would involve Death, I was curious how they were going to handle Miguel Ferrer’s character. (In case a reader is not aware, Ferrer played Death in episodes like “Death in Bloom” and “Betty,” but he sadly passed away a few years ago). The producers’ choice to feature him in a non-speaking cameo—despite playing a relatively significant role in the story—was wise; I’m not sure if I can articulate the exact reasons, but something about his role felt appropriate and not gross, as some post-mortem memorials can be. Speaking of which, the wonderful, lovely Polly Lou Livingston was featured for the last time in this episode as Tree Trunks, happily in heaven with her literal harem of husbands. It was funny, it really was, and I’m sure that Polly Lou would’ve gotten a kick out of seeing it on screen. (Also, this is a pro-Tree Trunks safe space. Any Tree Trunks haters will be chucked into the 1st Dead World with Wyatt.)

The biggest mystery in this whole thing, for me at least, is the question of Princess Bubblegum and Marceline. Several years ago, I wrote an essay about what could’ve happened to them in the Ooo 1000+ universe. I speculated that they peaced out and left Ooo behind. In this special, neither Bubblegum nor Marceline are to be found in the Candy Kingdom—Peppermint Butler seems to be the one in charge, given that he is now wearing Bubblegum’s crown. Likewise, the duo aren’t anywhere in the Dead Worlds either. Maybe the two of them skipped town and got a duplex in the Nightosphere? Who knows… I just want my favorite gals to be OK!

All things considered, “Together Again” was a marvel: An episode that managed to feel like a series finale even more than “Come Along with Me” already did without taking away from the series itself. An episode that managed to make the idea of dying funny. An episode that brought back the Lich in a way that wasn’t forced. An episode that made Mr. Fox the New New Death. An episode that gave us a beautiful ending to Finn and Jake’s story… as well as the beautiful beginning to a new one. I said it on Twitter, and I’ll say it again here: “Together Again” was the end of a sentence in a book with infinite pages. Truly, the fun will never end.

Mushroom War evidence: Everything takes place in the Dead Worlds, so not really. Perhaps a more eagle-eyed viewer can inform us...

Final Grade: That’s right, I’m gonna do it...

Post-script, I actually messaged Jesse Moynihan to ask about his writing credit. He told me that it was for an unused story idea that he had developed. I’m not certain, but I’ll bet it was a part of the cancelled TV movie they were trying to make during season 5, since that would’ve seen Finn and Orgalorg journey to the various Dead Worlds.

[hotmonkeelove]

I agree with most of what you've added. My personal headcanon is that both Saionji and Touga are bi/ pansexual, and that technically ALL the characters in the series are bi/ pan (and yes, I include Juri ), as sexuality in Utena comes across as very fluid. It's more about choosing to be with whomever you fall in love with, rather than the person you're expected to be with, regardless of gender. In a society like Japan, where fitting in with others is a major social pressure, and where marriage interviews are still a thing, free love (by its original 19th century definition) is both revolutionary and queer.

And while I agree that the pressure of heteronormative conformity is contributing to the toxic relationship between Saionji and Anthy, I feel the root cause is the abuse both have already been suffering since childhood. Their behaviour reflects societal gender norms and stereotypes, too. These have to do with gender politics just as much, if not more than, sexual orientation. Anthy, who has long been Akio's victim and is completely brainwashed by him, plays the subjugated doormat, while also engaging in covert passive-aggression (mostly in ways that will aid Akio).

Saionji has an extreme sense of inferiority, particularly as it relates to his manhood. He is also battling depression (he's crying in the opening animation), despite being expected to hide his tears as both a man and Japanese. We see in the first arc that this is largely due to having spent his life in Touga's shadow. His best friend is more successful at everything, is wealthy, more popular with girls, appears to have a happy family, and has better control of his emotions. Touga's even better at kendo, which is pretty much all Saionji has. I think it's safe to infer that the only reason Saionji is the kendo capatain is because Touga didn't join the team. This is all in addition to his cruelty, duplicitous treatment, and acting out his sexual abuse on Saionji, (and possibly grooming him for Akio). Personally, I also get the impression that Saionji comes from a very dysfunctional home, where the father is emotionally distant (and possibly abusive to his wife) and the mother is physically/ verbally abusive to her son. This would fit with his being insecure in his masculinity, his attitude towards women, and his latching onto Touga time and again, despite the way Touga treats him, because he feels he has no one else. What's more, it would add to his desperation to get back in Ohtori after his expulsion. When home and family aren't safe, school can take on a much greater importance. (Really, why didn't he go home after being expelled? Was he afraid? Was he estranged from his family? Is he an orphan? Did he return only to be thrown out?)

Furthermore, his rotten self esteem and the mess he's in affects his relationship with Wakaba. We are shown that she holds a special place in his heart. He comes to truly care about her, but he's convinced he's really just a burden to her, especially when he has no position or influence at Ohtori. Saionji doesn't believe Wakaba is really in love with him, or that if she is, he doesn't deserve her, because he thinks he's not good enough, never realising she thinks the same about herself. Plus, I'd argue that the reason we don't see them interact again is because he doesn't want to drag her into his mess, with the duels, Touga, and later with Akio; that he's trying to protect her from becoming another victim.

Another thing I'd like to mention, I think Saionji likely developed romantic feelings for Touga during the Apocalypse arc, as he mistook Touga's abuse of him for genuine affection. When Touga fell in love with Utena (the only time we know Touga actually falls in love with anyone), I think Saionji convinced himself that he could get Anthy back, and maybe continue an affair with Touga on the side. Post Revolution, I believe Touga would come to terms with his abuse by and of others, as well as his sex addiction, and eschew sexual relationships until he can start to recover. As such, I'd like to imagine he'd seek Saionji's forgiveness and try to gradually rebuild their friendship. (And I really hope they both get therapy, despite the stigma it still carries in Japan, among other places.)

We later see variations on this theme of unbalanced friendships with sexual overtones in Shiori and Juri, as well as Wakaba and Utena. Juri's emotional distance, while secretly and unknowingly reciprocating Shiori's romantic feelings, leads to Shiori trying to arouse sexual jealousy in Juri. Utena's disapproval of Saionji and interference with Tatsuya, yet otherwise true friendship, results in Wakaba (who really just pretends to fancy Utena for funsies) hiding her relationship with and lingering feelings for Saionji, till she breaks down and lashes out at Utena. Later, Wakaba tries to make her jealous by flirting with Akio, who goes along with it just to manipulate Utena's feelings. (Wakaba's romantic feelings for Akio are no more serious than her romantic feelings for Utena or Tatsuya.)

Still, I say that it is wrong to claim a man hits his girlfriend or tries to sleep with every woman around him because he's in the closet. In fact, that's kind of the opposite of how they act. It's more common for them to form strong bonds with women, while trying to avoid sex with them as much as they can.

Dear Fellow Utena Fans,

I am really ashamed to be part of the Utena fandom here. Seriously, I can't turn around without seeing people saying, "Saionji and Touga's abusive behaviour is because they were in denial that they're gay for each other." That is not funny, nor insightful, nor realistic. I'll tell you what it is, though. It's fucking homophobic! I am sick of it! RGU's appeal is largely due to its themes of queer acceptance, but you people can't even learn from it! You just promote hateful, dated stereotypes, because "Huh-huh, that's funny!"

The terrible ways Saionji and Touga are shown treating people has nothing to do with their sexual orientations, whatever those may or may not be. It's all to do repeating a cycle of abuse they have both fallen victim to. Touga has been sexually abused most of his life (likely by more than one perpetrator). He copes by acting out this sexual abuse on his best friend, attempting to abuse his sister, and his compulsive promiscuity. Touga also manipulates and back-stabs those around him, thinking it makes him superior to others, i.e. no longer a victim. Saionji copes with Touga sexually abusing him and betraying their friendship by lashing out at anyone who angers him. He is particularly abusive to Anthy, as he thinks that as the Rose Bride, she has no feelings. (In fairness, Anthy has also convinced herself she has no feelings, and actively goads him into hurting her, at Akio's behest, to lure Utena into the duels.)

If you ship Touga and Saionji, fine, that's great! Go right ahead. There is certainly a lot of angst/ tearjerker potential there, with them working to rebuild their broken friendship and overcome the horrible trauma they've been through. They're both in need of a lot of healing, which could develop into romantic feelings for each other, as well as a redemption arc. However, claiming they're abusive because they're gay and trying to downplay the abuse they, themselves, suffered, is just a load of bullshit.

This stupid joke/ theory is insulting to not only the queer community, but also abuse survivors. (And yes, I fall into both those groups.) Being gay doesn't make anyone an abuser, nor does being abused by someone of the same gender make a person gay. I shouldn't even have to say that, let alone twice on my blog, but idiots...