#which btw i think it has a cool atmosphere. i need to draw it

[flionp]

Also their dynamics. My brain has been insane about them.

[naeviskz]

WHIRLWIND ๑‧˚₊ ─── HHJ

synopsis ; you overreact just a teensy bit when you see hyunjin talking to another girl, but when you find out the actual reason why … you try everything you can to make it up to him.

genre 숌 non-idol au, boyfriend!hyunjin x girlfriend!reader | established relationship

words - 3.6k tags/warnings 숌 fluff, (some) angst? pwp, smut, reader gets very jealous easily/has possessive tendencies, small mentions of insecurities, v v v clingy & needy gf, marking, dry humping, dirty talk, oral (m), lowkey daddy kink, hj has a big cawk, breeding kink cause that’s my fave tehe. i will preface that oc kinda has a toxic way of thinking and it’s def not healthy to act this way irl !!

now playing 🎧 : cool with you by newjeans, streets by doja cat

☆ 彡

[ this my first ever writing that has smut in it so bear w/ me pls ;-; i’m still learning how to do this right haha, but lmk if you enjoyed this at all <3 **not proofread btw ! ]

“Let’s go on that one next Jinnie!!” You squeal like a giddish teenager as you point to the ride up ahead, violently pulling on Hyunjin’s hand his entire arm might just fall off.

It’ll be your 1 year anniversary in approximately a week, and what better way to pre celebrate than going to the amusement park and watching fireworks at night? You haven’t been to one in years, reminiscing all those times you were a kid innocently frolicking around, not having a single care in the world. Since you’re a fully grown adult now it’s an altered experience, you’re able to pick up on social cues and no longer need parental supervision. You forgot just how thrilling it was to let loose and have fun, all while spending it with your lovely boyfriend.

The current ride you’re both getting on is essentially a giant wooden pirate ship that swings in a horizontal motion, elevating you high up in the air. You don’t do heights very well but Hyunjin’s a little daredevil who gets off on the adrenaline rush. He’s tried convincing you to do skydiving but that’s just something you refuse to compromise on. Before going on the pirate ship ride you went on the teacups, which was probably your favorite one of today. You couldn’t stop giggling and teasing Hyunjin over how incredibly fast he was spinning the turn-wheel, almost forgetting that you were also supposed to contribute. Spending quality time with your boyfriend like this means everything to you, he makes you feel like you’re floating on a pink cloud whenever you’re together. Like nothing else matters but you and him.

As the day progressed, what was once a milky, pale blue sky has now become a smoky dull atmosphere. Night was approaching any minute, making the temperature drop dramatically— you regret leaving the house in just shorts and a crop top. Your limbs shaking and trembling involuntarily from gusts of cool air the wind casually blows, Hyunjin seems to take note of this and takes action immediately.

“Want my hoodie babe?” Hyunjin asks out of concern, ready to yank it off the minute you agree.

You profusely nod at his offer, unable to withstand the frigid weather for another second. He pauses momentarily to grab the hem of his Versace sweatshirt with his free hand, swiftly drawing it over his head and handing it to you. Underneath he wore a thin plain white tee, now suffering from the cold— but any sacrifice is worthy of making for his precious babygirl.

Quickly putting it on, your body feels instantly warmer from his body heat still embedded into the soft fabric. “You saved me Jinnie, I almost turned into a human popsicle!” Were you exaggerating a bit? Maybe, but that’s beside the point. You’re all cozy now in Hyunjin’s oversized hoodie, loving the fact that only you get to wear his clothes.

His eyes shape into crescents as he flashes an adoring smile, “my diet would only consist of peach flavored ___ popsicles for the rest of my life then.”

You swear he’s just the cutest, most adorable, sweetest thing to have ever walked this earth. Sometimes you wonder how you got so lucky to end up with a person as charming, and perfect as Hyunjin. He’d say the same about you too but there’s another layer to how you feel. You’re often very over protective and territorial over him, needing to know exactly where he is at all times and who he’s hanging out with. Most of the time he’s with you, either at your place or at his. There was a set routine you two had at this point, after he’s done with work he’ll call and let you know he’s on his way to yours. Hyunjin knows how paranoid you can get when he’s gone for too long so he makes sure to communicate with you as much as he can throughout the day. It’s hard to deal with someone as high maintenance as you but he makes it work, he likes that you’re always worried and concerned about him — he’d rather have a girlfriend like that than one who doesn’t care about him.

“Looks like the sun should be setting soon.. won’t be much longer ‘til the fireworks start!” You cheer out of excitement, part of the reason you wanted to come was to see them.

He nods in agreement, “you’re right, is there anything else you wanna ride before they start?”

As if your brain answered before you could even think, “You.”

His doe eyes widened at your bold reply, never quite getting used to your subtle dirty mind. “I’ll give you that in due time, don’t worry mamas.”

A little bit later on you challenged Hyunjin to try the ‘test your strength’ game and of course he couldn’t pass up a moment to impress you. He gets into a competitive sports stance, gripping the hammer tightly before he swung hard at the puck. The meter flew straight up and hit the bell on his first try, able to win whatever prize he wanted from the largest section. He lets you choose whichever plushy you wanted, a giant fluffy pink stuffed unicorn that you held in your other hand that wasn’t occupied with Hyunjin’s.

“Hyunjinnieee, ‘m getting kinda hungry,” you childishly whine in hopes of getting him to buy you both food.

Before he could even get a response out your eyes were already fixated on something. The glowing neon lights of a food stand selling mozzarella corn dogs, you’ve always wanted to try those as you see them all the time on TikTok. Without hesitation you make a mad dash for the line as you drag your innocent boyfriend along for the adventure. As you got closer you realize the lines pretty spread out, there was at least 20+ people waiting but you were willing to stay as you really wanted one.

Hyunjin detaches his hand from yours, making you question his sudden intentions, “be right back babe, m’gonna go to the restroom.” He politely excuses himself, “here’s my card just in case I don’t make it back in time.” Pulling his credit card from his wallet to hand you before venturing off.

“Don’t be gone for too long please, or else I’ll come find you myself.” You were dead serious too, honestly speaking you didn’t necessarily want him out of your sight but you trust that he’ll come back in a reasonable amount of time. Hopefully.

“I promise babe.” He reassures, giving a quick peck to your forehead before vanishing into the crowd.

After what seemed like an eternity, you manage to secure the corn dogs and pay for them with Hyunjin’s card. Realizing now that your boyfriend is still gone, it’s been a good 15-20 minutes and he promised that he’d be back. Now you have to go looking for him like a mother who’s just lost their child. Scanning every area of the park you came across, you begin to feel anxious when you don’t see him anywhere. A range of negative thoughts intrude your mind with possibilities of where he could’ve gone. What you weren’t expecting was for your intuition to be exactly spot on.

There he was standing in front a taco truck, talking and laughing with another girl. A girl you absolutely do not recognize and have no clue why or what she’s doing even having a conversation with your man. You couldn’t move at all, frozen in place as you watched the scene fold out in front of you, making you more livid as it continues. The mystery girl was pissing you off by the minute, the tiny skirt she wore barely left anything to the imagination and her body language was way too close for comfort for your liking. You had to put a stop to this immediately.

Slowly you make your way up to them, examining the situation further. The blonde girl tries to loom even closer to Hyunjin but he backs away a bit, a sheer look of fear and paranoia in his eyes. She keeps talking to him but he doesn’t really say much back, only half smiling and nodding. What makes you pick up your pace at lightning speed was when he pulls his phone out from his back pocket, as if he’s about to ask for her number.

You’ve seen enough, it’s time to intervene now.

Practically sprinting up to them you see the girl perk up when she sees you, giving a friendly wave and inviting smile as if she wasn’t just trying to steal your man a second ago. You’re ready to rip this bitches hair out and show her that she’s picked the wrong one to mess with today.

“Oh hi, you must be ___, it’s so good to finally meet you!” Her voice was so squeaky and high-pitched, not even in a cute way, just obnoxiously loud and annoying.

…How the fuck does this girl know who you are?

“Who the hell is this?” You snap at Hyunjin, completely ignoring the girl’s presence, “How does she know you?”

“I’m— ”

“I believe I asked my boyfriend, not you. Who is she?” You rudely cut her off to reiterate the question.

Hyunjin looks like he’s just witnessed a murder, his own murder to be exact. “This is Valerie, we went to high school together, I was just showing her your freelance work and all the cool designs you make ‘cause she’s looking for graphic designers and I think you’re really talented babe.”

Your heart just sank to the pit of your stomach. The balled up fist your right hand was clenching soon released itself, no longer in fight mode but flight mode from the sudden embarrassment you’re internally battling.

“Oh..”

“Uh, well it was nice talking to you Hyunjin! I’ll go find my husband now, but your graphics are incredible ___ and I’d love to hire you for a couple projects I have lined up. Here’s my business card!” She hands you the flimsy card stock and leaves in an instant.

Now you feel totally ridiculous for almost causing a scene and cursing out the girl and your boyfriend for just wanting to promote your work. You owe him an apology big time.

“I thought you were…”

“Flirting with another girl, seriously? You think I have a death wish or something? Of course I’d never try something like that. The first thing she saw was you as my lock screen when I checked the time. Plus she’s married, I don’t think she’d be that dumb.” Hyunjin further proves his case, making sure not to leave any details out.

“M’sorry baby, please forgive me.” You plead for forgiveness, regressing back to your softer, more gentle side “lemme make it up to you daddy.”

“Nngh! Hyunjin-” you keen into his ear as you rub your clothed heat against his toned thigh, holding onto him for stable support.

You seriously felt bad for acting out like that earlier, all you want to do now is make him feel so good he forgets all about your previous unhinged behavior. Lord knows what you’d do if you ever lose someone so important to you. You can’t think about that right now though. Right now was all about him and making him feel good, but you can’t help but get something out of it as well.

The backseat of his car was a bit cramped as he decided to take his smaller convertible instead of the SUV, not exactly bargaining that later on you’d be getting freaky in his vehicle. Nonetheless you enjoy each other’s company, not needing much space anyway — if anything you wanted to be as close to him as possible. If you could get inside his skin you probably would. You love Hyunjin more than yourself, often feeling like you aren’t good enough to be with him. Maybe the reason you’re so protective and jealous is because you fear he’ll leave you for someone better.

Lazily trailing your lips down further, placing small pecks here and there until you land on his neck, adorned with a dainty silver chain, nuzzling your face into the crook of it. He smells so good, the cologne he’s wearing along with his natural pheromones is an intoxicating concoction. You stick your tongue out, gliding the wet muscle over his bare skin, still feverishly rutting into him while listening to his ethereal moans.

“Mmm.. I love you.” He murmurs under his breath, slipping his hands underneath (his) your hoodie to feel you up. His hands travel upwards to find the valley of your breasts, still covered by the bra you’re wearing he slides underneath the cups to lightly squeeze them.

You nibble on his neck in response, harshly sucking on the flesh to leave visible love bites, you want to make it abundantly clear to the whole world Hwang Hyunjin belongs to you.

“I love you more Hyunjinnie,” you stop for a brief moment to say, “gonna prove it.” Which you will once you’re satisfied with marking his entire neck and chest with dozens of purple and red hickeys.

Even though he’s touching you, grinding his hard length into you and purring out your name, you need more. Craving to see and feel more of him, you tug at the hem of his t-shirt in hopes he catches your drift.

“Off. Now.” You demand sharply, getting more impatient by the second.

He obliges instantly, stripping the garment off his body to reveal the most gorgeous set of abs you’ve laid your eyes upon, he’s so unreal it makes you constantly question if you’re dreaming. You went from his neck to kissing his plump lips, his hand cupping the side of your face to deepen the kiss, both so desperate and horny for each other. Running your manicured hands down his beautiful body, just the tiniest flexing Hyunjin does with his muscles makes you go crazy. You need him to manhandle you, have you bent over and get fucked senselessly.

“Lie back Jinnie, m’gonna suck you off.” You command him to move, getting up from him so he can pivot into a more comfortable position.

He shuffles around, leaning into the leather seat before quickly undoing his pants and sliding them down his ankles. You get on your knees, disappearing between his legs to come in contact with his stiff erection. Tracing figure eights on his thighs, he hisses from your delicate touch. You couldn’t resist planting a chaste kiss to his stomach, leaving another wet kiss to his v-line. Any little touch makes Hyunjin’s heart beat out of his chest, he can’t get enough of you just as you can’t of him— high off each other like an addictive, psychoactive drug.

As you finally free his cock from the last barrier, his boxer briefs, you’re in awe from just how much precum he’s leaking already. His length stood straight up resting on his stomach, faint veins protruding around the shaft. You kiss his pretty pink tip while looking up at him with innocent eyes, grabbing the base of his cock, opening your mouth just a little to provide a few kitten licks. You’ve only just started but he feels like he’s going to come undone already.

“Shit-” he lowly grunts, feeling his cock pulsate in your tiny hand.

Taking him further in your mouth now, you manage to fit half of his length, bobbing your head up and down while keeping a tight suction on his cock. Hyunjin involuntarily rocks his hips into you, making you gag just a little from how big he is. You could never fit all of him (except for that one time you were super drunk and magically forgot what a gag reflex was) but you still try your best and that’s all that matters to him. He loves that you’re always willing to give him random blowjobs whenever and wherever, you both love public sex and the idea of possibly being caught. You take a short break to collect more saliva, spitting on his cock and spreading it with your hand to make it even messier. His mouth was permanently agape, staring down at you with lust filled eyes, not knowing how much longer he can last. When you start pumping his cock much faster along with swirling your tongue around it , he thinks he might just lose it. Panting heavily, he shifts underneath you in attempt to get you to stop but you keep sucking like the cock hungry slut you are for him. He’s seriously going to nut any minute if you continue at this rate.

“Babe.. you’re gonna make me cum if you keep this up…” he closes his eyes, almost giving in to what’s inevitably about to come.

“Isn’t that the goal?” You ask quickly before going back.

“No,” he says, slightly frustrated with you for not obeying, “fucking this tight little pussy is.”

You’re confused when he’s pulling you away from him, moving you from the floor and back onto his lap all in one swift action, manhandling you for real this time. “What’re you doing!” You raise your voice at him like a brat, to which he spanks your behind in response.

“Shh.. relax.” He shuts you up by pulling you in for a slow, sensual kiss.

You moan into his mouth, melting right into his touch like always. “Need you so bad please..” you whine for to feel more of him.

“Tell me what you need, I’ll give it to you baby.” He promises, lacing his fingers in your hair, looking at you with pure admiration.

“Your cock.. need your big fat cock inside me now,” you beg like a good girl, “please daddy, i’m literally soaking for you.” Shameless at this point with how you talk, but you know the dirtier you get the more Hyunjin likes it.

He can’t say no when you ask so polite that. “I’ll give it to you, I’ll give you whatever you want princess.”

And he does.

Once he rids you of your shorts and underwear, you’re back on top of him, lining yourself up with his thick cock that slides right in from you being so ready.

“Fuck you’re so wet baby.. you take this cock so well cutie,” he praises you in the hottest way possible. You’ll never get tired of hearing him talk like this to you, hence why you love to have sex so much.

“Only for you daddy.” You breathlessly spoke, getting used to his length for a moment before beginning to move. Slowly bouncing up and down his member at first until Hyunjin slams his cock into you, walls clenching as you feel every inch of him. You shifted from grinding on him in slow motion to picking up your speed, placing both hands around his neck. Hyunjin throws his head back in pleasure, wrapping his hand around your waist as the other grips the soft flesh of your ass.

“Mine… your cock is mine,” you’re going faster and faster, crying out as he matches your movements, thrusting back into you hard. “Only I get to ride this everyday.”

He doesn’t hesitate to agree, letting you know exactly who he belongs to. “I’m all yours babygirl, can have this cock as much as you want, use me to get yourself off..”

You feel like you’re about to come soon, legs shaking and spasming from his girth splitting you open. “Yes baby..” you couldn’t think straight anymore, “love your cock so much Jinnie..” You mewl from being so full and cockstuffed “mmph.. wanna have your babies.”

“Yeah? Want me to fill your little cunt with all my cum and get you pregnant, hmm ? That what you want pretty girl?” He sounded so pussy drunk he couldn’t even blame you for wanting to any of this.

One more thrust was all it took for the thread to unravel inside of you, seeing white, glowing stars as you get closer to your orgasm.

“Jinnie kiss me.”

He does as he’s told, grabbing your face to kiss you roughly, entering his tongue in your mouth to intertwine with yours. He’s so good at everything he does it’s insane. Maybe if the dick wasn’t so damn good you wouldn’t be half as crazy.

“I’m so close princess..” he announces, slipping one of his long, slender digits onto your clit, coaxing your release.

“Me too.”

Everything feels ultra sensitive to you as you approach your climax, whimpering as Hyunjin sucks on your perked nipples while you continue riding him. A sudden rambunctious crackling sound startles the both of you, but what you weren’t expecting to see outside were fireworks lighting up the night sky. You’d completely forgot how excited you were to see them, watching in amazement as all the vibrant colors morph together. Leaning in to tenderly kiss your boyfriend who was also momentarily distracted, you get back right to business, chasing after your highs. Hyunjin finishes inside you like you wanted, feeling his hot seed spill into your aching heat. You came undone shortly after, holding onto him while your bare chests collide. Fireworks detonate inside your body as they do outside.

As if the universe had orchestrated the perfect 1 year anniversary pre celebration just for the two of you; a perfect moment to seal your love with the glittering magic of romance and fireworks combined. Hyunjin’s so happy to have met someone like you, someone who loves him so passionately and so deeply. He may not understand why you think the way you do sometimes, or react with such brash methods, but he knows that you do it out of pure love. It’s a whirlwind of emotions dating you but he wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world or have it any other way.

- 完 ♡︎

[insufferablelust]

small blurb about wrestling with mgg and it getting steamy 🥺 (love your writing btw)

YAY FIRST OFFICIAL BLURB REQ FOR OUR VERY OWN— ‘HOT THOUGHTS FRIDAY’ LMAO, enjoy! and wear your mask!

———

Oh but imagine he just wrapped up the moonlight mv production, so the very next day— he spent all day with you going to the local libraries, cafes, and walk around the park. You were absolutely gorgeous in your sundress, that he had to stop and stare a few times whilst you were reading your books or like right now,

As your head perched beautifully on his lap, with his fingers stroking your hair and the cool breeze of the park just washing over the both of you. You and Matthew— but you specifically has been cooped up inside your house for weeks, and this was your very first time going out again, and enjoying the nature.

Matthew smiled as he leaned on his palm, on the small tapestry you both laid out to sit on— he admired how your face scrunches at the heavy wind, how your eyes fluttering open and shut because it makes you sleepy— Matthew can’t get enough of you that it seems like it went straight to how the bulge on his crotch formed.

You didn’t noticed at first, how could you? you were just laying there innocently— enjoying the breeze with your boyfriend of 2 years, but the minute you do, your eyes snapped open and locked with his— flickering your gaze between the tent on his jeans and the grins on his face as you sat up abruptly,

“Oh my god, Matthew we’re in a public place!” You giggled as you look around and slapped his arms, before wrapping your arms around yourself. “What?! you can’t blame me, you’re the one who’s just that gorgeous that i can’t— help but to get excited.” he scoffed, lips twitch into a smirk slightly.

You rolled your eyes before crawling up to straddle his lap, caused him to look around and gripped your hips tightly, “Baby we can’t— there might be—“ His words were cut off as you press a soft lingering kiss onto his lips, and huffed out a small, “Shut up”

“Y/N, Behave.” He said sternly, his eyebrows furrowed, and the tent grew impossibly much more noticeable.

“I said— shut up.” You whispered as you trailed your fingers up and down his sides, to his inner thighs. Matthew looked around in panic, not only that you were in a public place but he’s a celebrity for god’s sake, his publicist would be furious if they knew he was getting a damn hand job in a public place during covid-19.

You tried your best not to giggle as you watched him get so riled up— over nothing really, you knew you were evil, but the burn on your ass from yesterday’s rough play-time has convinced yourself that you would get your damn revenge today. So when he half expects you to open his zipper, your nimble fingers ran up his sides instead and before he noticed, you went to tickle his sides and laughed loudly,

“Y/N! oh you’re in fucking trouble now!” He exclaimed as he quickly overpowered you, tackling you to the ground, but you weren’t going to get beaten so easily so that resulted in you both wrestling on a public park— surely drawing attention to everybody that walks by.

You were panting and smiling as you tackled him to the ground once more— well more like he’s letting you tackled him to the ground, quickly announcing your victory, “Look at that gubler! i’m in charge now!” He watched you with amusement in his eyes, cocking his head to the side and displayed a faux pout, “You sure about that, princess?”

“About what?”

“That you’re in charge?” That caused you to scoff greatly,

“Well look who’s under me— you are, so that means you’re my bitch.” You threw your head back as you giggled— which was a big mistake, considering how quickly his palm wrapped itself on your neck, squeezing a tiny bit before carefuly flipping the both of you over, with him on top of you— and you, well you’re gasping, and slightly whimpering at the sudden chance on the domineering atmosphere.

He chuckled as he rolled his eyes condescendingly, “Seems like you always managed to forget who owns you, i’m not surprised though— considering how much of a brat you are.”

“Matthew—“ He groaned before tightening his palm on your pulse,

“Shh shut up— you’re my bitch now, we’re going home because it seems like someone needs their goddamn nap. So stand the fuck up right now and wear your damn mask. If you so much as to think of disobeying me, i’ll whip your ass right here for everyone to fucking see.”

Oh, The car ride home would be really really interesting.

~

That is cute sghsjs istg im in the middle of a damn exam whilst writing this lmao, anyways thank you for reading, requesting and supporting! Blurb reqs are always open, just send in your asks!

[butterflydm]

The Untamed Rewatch (ep 4)

Previous Episode | Index | Next Episode

aka Rules, Rules, Rules

things that stood out this rewatch under the read more (spoilers for entire series; mostly drama only as I haven't read the novel translation yet and only know what I've seen bouncing around online):

We start off with Wei Wuxian running off so as not to miss the greeting ceremony (the 'salute' I think it was called in the tencent translation). We get a lot of sort of subtle (well, until we get to the Wens) introductions to character and relationship interactions and also to the general atmosphere of Gusu. They have… a lot of rules. Some people really thrive on rules and structure and some people, well, don't. The trouble with WWX and the The Rules is that he already has his own moral center in place that conflicts with the rules. He grew up under a very different set of rules and — from what some of the characters says — he was in a complicated situation of being both privileged and favored while at the same time reminded that he was considered not on the same level as Jiang Cheng. Regardless, very different type of rules than the ones in place at Gusu.

Our introduction to Nie Huaisang and Meng Yao is actually fairly sad in retrospect, in that it contains some narrative irony — first of all, that they came together (because Meng Yao is working as the 'vice envoy' for the Nie clan, I believe it says?). And they're just both so young here and things could have gone so differently. Nie Huaisang is also introduced breaking the rules by bringing in his little bird. 

I absolutely did NOT figure out that Nie Huaisang was the fan guy from episode one in my first viewing, btw. I think I didn't realize it until we were way back into the present timeline. I have a ton of love for him, though, which I touched on in my very first post — he's smart and a good liar who knows his own strengths and weaknesses. He had an incredibly weak hand of cards at the start of his revenge play and so it took him time but he figured out how to get justice for his brother even against the person who was, literally, in the strongest position in the cultivation world. Five stars, very impressed. 

As much as I love Nie Huiasang, I also genuinely love Meng Yao/Jin Guangyao. He's interesting and complicated and we see enough of what hurt him that I do understand why he behaves the way he does (as I understand it, it's even more morally grey in the novel, which I'm looking forward to seeing when I read the translation). I certainly don't blame any of his victims for taking revenge against him, but wow, what a fascinating person. 

I think it's the last flashback we get of him, after Jin Guangshan had him thrown off the tower steps, where we see him in obvious pain but still forcing himself to stand up, smile, and bow towards the person who just had him hurt… I think of that moment every time I see him now, honestly. And he is just such a person of extremes and powerful emotions and yet his mask is always on so tightly that we only ever get glimpses of what he's really feeling underneath it. While WWX can appear lawless to people like Lan Qiren but actually does have a strong sense of right and wrong (whether or not he always lives up to it, he tries), JGY genuinely is willing to throw any and all moral rules away in an attempt to protect and advance himself. So he mirrors and contrasts against both of the leading men.

Of course, this is also the beginning of something I found myself tragically shipping over the course of The Untamed. Ah, XiYao. Meng Yao does some terrible things over the course of the story. For someone who comes across as self-effacing, he actually has a fierce ability to hold grudges and extract revenge for slights against him. 

But his introduction here is very sympathetic, as we hear some students gossiping about him (quieted by Lan Qiren) and then see Lan Xichen step forward to publicly praise him in an attempt to lessen the impact of the gossip. There's some significant eye contact and subtle touching and I am weak. And we know that Meng Yao does latch onto Lan Xichen here in a way that he does with literally no other character, in that this is the one person he isn't willing to sacrifice for his own reputation and life. It's not a hugely healthy relationship, on both sides, but it is very interesting.

The whole Wen incursion here is, I believe, a drama-only thing? As I understand it, a large part of what the drama does is try to set things up early to give the central characters more time to know each other (and, also, More Romance with literally everyone which, as a romance fan, I do not object to). So, we're introduced to the Wens bullying their way into the lessons (though I'm not sure we see Wen Qing actually attend a single lesson? I will keep an eye out; I actually don't remember how many lessons we end up seeing) in the middle of the ceremony. They use this scene both to show Wen Chao's behavior but also to set up his dislike of Wei Wuxian early because WWX is, of course, the person who stands against Wen Chao directly and challenges him. This is the first chance that Jin Zixuan would have to notice that WWX is Just Like That in general, rather than being like that specifically with him, but it's a distracting enough moment that I will not blame him for probably not noticing.

Things during the face-off that stood out to me in particular:

    I think they do a good job characterizing Wen Chao as a realistic bully — when he has power, he abuses it, but when he's powerless later on, we see him being petulant and pitiful (and still demanding). He's a bully in part because he knows he can get away with it because of his father's power.

    Lan Wangji wants to Fight but looks to his brother and listens when his brother indicates that he should refrain. Young Lan Wangji is just Ready To Fight at all times, but he's also very obedient to his elder brother.

    In contrast to this and not for the last time, Wei Wuxian jumps in to verbally spar against someone without ever looking at Jiang Wanyin to get permission. Though WWX's relationship with Jiang Wanyin is complicated in ways that Lan Wangji's isn't with his own brother. Lan Xichen is both sect leader and the eldest, while WWX is, I think, older than Jiang Wanyin (he's definitely the 'elder disciple'). But it does hint that their plan for the future, where WWX was Jiang Cheng's second in command, was never going to work long-term. Their personalities and their established relationship both work against that plan. WWX is a natural leader; we see him take point and take command over and over in the course of the series. When he believes he sees the right thing to do, he just does it. He doesn't ask permission first. When the Wens draw swords, WWX is the first one to draw in return and the others who do follow his lead, including Jiang Wanyin. And WWX does, I think, instinctively think of Jiang Cheng as his 'little brother' that ultimately he needs to protect for that reason, which is a different kind of protection that you would do for your leader.

One of the Jiang disciples who draws a sword is a woman. We don't get as many female disciples/cultivators as we do men but they are there and there are some important ones. Though none that I can think of in the present timeline, as opposed to the past one, apart from briefly seeing MianMian again. I will keep a look out when we get back to the present.

    Meng Yao shields Nie Huaisang similarly to how Jiang Cheng shields Jiang Yanli (though Meng Yao doesn't have a sword). It really must have been devastating for Nie Huaisang to realize that Jin Guangyao killed his brother, because Nie Huaisang did have reasons to trust him and believe he was 'like family' in a similar way to how Wei Wuxian was family to the Jiang clan.

    Wen Qing seems more like she's holding Wen Ning back than she's shielding him. It's interesting. It might be part of her playing cool in front of Wen Chao. Not certain. We haven't gotten to see Wen Ning's personality much so far, except that he's relatively timid.

    They make a point of showing us how impressed Meng Yao is with Lan Xichen playing to diffuse the situation and disarm everyone.

I love this dynamic. We only really get it for a short time, considering, but Nie Huaisang's open admiration of WWX does set up some positive ulterior motives for him wanting to bring back WWX specifically to help him get revenge on his brother. Not just that he believes WWX to be the most capable but also that, though he might never have said it openly, but perhaps he believes that WWX deserved a second chance at life. And poor long-suffering Jiang Wanyin, who knows — just knows! — that having an admirer probably means WWX will get into even more trouble than he would have otherwise.

And, you know, that's probably true.

Meng Yao is literally just waiting around for Lan Xichen to get out of his meeting with Lan Qiren so that he can say goodbye to him specifically (the meeting had a lot of plot stuff, but some good characterization in showing that Lan Xichen and Lan Qiren are wary about Wen clan's intentions but determined to hold to their own standards and ideals anyway).  

So, this tiny tiny smile of Meng Yao's that we see him have right before he heads over to say goodbye to Lan Xichen is probably about a thousand times more sincere than all the big dimpled smiles we get later. No one is looking at him yet, he's just smiling because he's glad he has a chance to say goodbye to this one specific person who publicly singled him out as worthy despite what the gossiping people were saying. I think that it happened in public actually meant a great deal to Meng Yao? WWX is kind to him later on, in the Unclean Realm, but that's in private and it doesn't seem to have the same kind of emotional impact. Meng Yao's reputation means so much to him, so LXC openly stating Meng Yao's worth in front of the entire group of students and Lan Qiren is something that not only affects him personally but something that can positively affect his reputation as well, which means it affects him personally even more than it would otherwise.

At the end of this conversation, Meng Yao bows deeply to Lan Xichen and Lan Xichen doesn't only stop him from doing it, but directly calls them peers. And it's hard for Meng Yao to leave! Once he turns away from Lan Xichen, we can see in his face that it's difficult. And, of course, there's the lingering touch that comes for my life. The Lan brothers and their silent heartbreaks, I swear.

(why am I like this, honestly? This is like me getting into Steven Universe because I saw Garnet's "Stronger Than You" and then ending up having my heart repeatedly ripped in two by the tragedy of Pearl and Rose; and, like, I adore Rupphire. But sometimes my heart just wants a tragedy between two people who just didn't quite know the right ways to love each other, I guess!)

So! (and this is just rampant speculation that I will never get answers on because, again, I believe none of this is in the novel but) I wonder how long Meng Yao was originally planning on staying? Because Lan Xichen is surprised he's leaving so soon, and he'd had a seat right behind Nie Huaisang at the greeting ceremeny, so it seems like him leaving immediately was more prompted by his realization that even in the Cloud Recesses, he wasn't going to be able to escape the whispers about his parentage. In the drama, they mostly likely just wanted to introduce him to the audience and to Lan Xichen, but he didn't fit into the other plans they had for this section of the story, so they had him head off, but internal to the character and not taking the behind the scenes stuff into account, it seems like he was planning on staying longer, initially.

WWX and Nie Huaisang's scene together is adorable, and it's super-cute to see them having such innocent fun times. It does contrast strongly against WWX's scene right after with Wen Qing. He plays the fool with her, but it is obvious play-acting and not true light-heartedness the way it was with Nie Huaisang moments earlier. So we get to see two sides of WWX there, the genuine playfulness and the pretend playfulness as he tries to figure out what Wen Qing is doing. There's a lot of subtle things going on with the facial acting that makes it clear when he's being genuine and when he's playing pretend that I enjoy.

Now it's the night of that same day, and Jiang Yanli has made soup for her brothers. I'm trying to remember if we ever actually see Jiang Yanli eat, because I know she doesn't eat anything here (theory: she eats while she's cooking and thus is full when it comes time to actually sit down for the meal? my mom does that sometimes when she's done a lot of cooking). I'm going to keep an eye on that because I'm genuinely curious. Jiang Cheng is stressing out over WWX, again, because it's pretty much his self-appointed job tbh. Jiang Yanli just wants him to chill and accept that WWX is WWX. 

Another thing Jiang Cheng says here is something that resonates through his storyline with WWX: when will WWX take Yunmeng's Jiang clan into consideration? That's the tension line between WWX and Jiang Cheng for large parts of their flashback plotline together — Jiang Cheng wants WWX to be devoted to Jiang clan, but WWX keeps considering other things to be just as important. Because WWX doesn't ever treat Jiang clan as unimportant but he doesn't always treat it as the most important. And, to Jiang Cheng, it is absolutely the most important thing. Which makes perfect sense for him to feel, as he's the heir, so he has to consider the future of the clan and weigh it against the risks of acting. We see Lan Xichen do the same — he has to think about the politics, the optics of the situation. And that's something that WWX rarely thinks about ahead of time or, if he does, it's to scorn the idea that the optics should matter.

When Jiang Yanli points out that WWX's behavior actually fits their clan history and motto, this takes us to another puzzle piece of that tension — Jiang Cheng's jealousy. Here, it's not so bad. It comes and goes, depending on the situation. But WWX is naturally talented and also lives up to the clan's motto effortlessly, so again it's very understandable that Jiang Cheng feel jealous, honestly. Not always pretty, but understandable.

We do some time skipping, as everyone attends class (I do not see Wen Qing anywhere in the class when I look, so she's not trying all that hard at the 'undercover' part of her undercover spying — or maybe she changed into white robes too and that's why I can't spot her) and WWX is a brat and the class clown. Almost everyone but Lan Wangji and Jin Zixuan seem amused by him. Lan Wangji is definitely way more annoyed by WWX at this point than anything else, because it looks to him like WWX isn't willing to take things seriously. And I'm pretty sure Jin Zixuan thinks that WWX as just as arrogant as WWX thinks that JZX is, which is kinda funny.

We also get the first appearance of one of WWX's cute lil papermen. They're so adorable, as is the little 'nodding off to sleep' thing he does with them. Luckily, Lan Qiren snaps him out of it before Lan Wangji crumples the paperman, because I think from what they say later on, that was actually kinda dangerous if he'd still been inside it.

Lan Qiren, after catching WWX out on not paying attention in class, quizzes him. WWX is able to answer all his straight-forward questions easily and is obviously proud of himself, so Lan Qiren gives him a more challenging one, a question that deals with the practicalities of actually being a cultivator and making the choices that they need to make in these cases of literal life and death. And so we get our first mentions in the flashback of using resentful energy/demonic cultivation. Again, laying the groundwork for later, but doing it while also showing us character and relationship dynamics, which I like. Lan Qiren is really pissed off at WWX's suggestion to use resentful energy, to the point of throwing something at him (there's probably a rule against that) and kicking him out of class for the day.

Lan Wangji, of course, is the student who provides the model-perfect answer of what is correct according to 'proper' cultivation. What I really like about this section is that when Wei Wuxian challenges the idea of the proper method of cultivation, Lan Wangji actually interrupts his uncle so that he can answer Wei Wuxian back (I don't think he noticed that he was interrupting his uncle; he just really really had to correct Wei Wuxian; it was Vitally Important). Wei Wuxian, though, directs his response back to Lan Qiren. I do feel for Lan Qiren here. You get the impression that a student has never kept arguing back to him for so long and he gets so flustered over it (and over what Wei Wuxian is actually saying too, of course).

One of the things that does make WWX's behavior different than, say, Jin Guangyao is that WWX doesn't keep his methods a secret. He doesn't try to hide the 'how' of what he's doing, even when he knows everyone will disdain him for it. He owns it, essentially, which he what he says to Lan Wangji way in the future during the episode where Lan Wangji is drunk — he made his choices and he will live with the consequences and it's no one else's responsibility.

I do understand, from what I've read, that WWX is softened a bit in the drama — some things that are his responsibility in the novel aren't his fault here — but we see here that he was already aware of and willing to go down this road of cultivating resentful energy so in that, at least, the intention is there from the start. And Lan Qiren points out that there's the essential problem that Wei Wuxian doesn't know how to actually keep the resentful energies from causing collateral damage, and WWX doesn't have an answer for that.

And then, of course, WWX does not actually go to the library to copy the rules, as Lan Qiren ordered, but goes off to the forbidden back area with the lakes and waterfalls instead. So, you know, good call on sending Wangji to go babysit him tbh.

But it means that WWX gets to meet Wen Ning!

It's a super-cute meeting where WWX sees Wen Ning's great archery skills and compliments him, and then tells Wen Ning to think of them as equals. Wen Ning is apparently younger than everyone else, because he's too young to be a student at the lessons. I think the rest of them are supposed to be fifteen? That's what I've seen floating around online, but I'm not sure they ever say it on-screen. And WWX is a little embarrassed to say he was kicked out by the teacher, which is interesting.

And I guess we do get evidence here that Wen Qing is not attending class, because WWX is only not in class right now because he was kicked out.

The next scene is a 'cliffhanger' that gets reprised in the opening of episode 5, so I'll talk about then. This one is already really long (I say, as if it's likely they'll get shorter, lol).

Next time: Lan Zhan and Wei Ying get some private time in the library together!

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[celebistar]

@a-rumbly-in-my-tumbly​ said if we're interested we can and I'm shirking work (when am I not lol) so yay? Idk who to tag, honestly I feel that creates a negative atmosphere b/c then the people who aren't tagged are like wtf. So feel free to do if you like talking about about yourself!

What’s your age? A lot older than most people probably think I am; I have mentioned it here and there casually, but as of this post, I'm 27.

What’s your current job? I am a UX (user experience) researcher, but with an emphasis on data privacy/security in the future. I also do UI/UX design sometimes, though I am not terribly great at it. Some of my work also goes into data science territory. 

To those outside the field it probably sounds super boring and technical, but I've discovered that I actually enjoy doing research and I'm pretty good at it. Also, my boss is really cool and let me deck out my office with all my otaku stuff (he himself actually spent his middle school years in Japan so he's bilingual, and has a fondness for the 80s era shounen shows, like Fist of the North Star)

What are you talented at? Hmm, well drawing fanart/writing fanfiction? I dunno if that's really a talent or a hobby considering only a small handful of people only actually give me feedback so *shrugs* I would probably put writing a bit higher than drawing though. Other than that, I've been told I can bake uncannily well; several of my classmates in college commented that they would legit shell out money for my baked goods...

What is a big goal you are working toward (or have already achieved)? Material-wise? Publish my own anthology did that twice already (woo hoo), next up maybe making a cosplay photo book?? Perhaps going to Comiket one day WITH cosplay... also I connected with the Hisa-works cluster in Japan and I got the chance to meet several of them in Japan and now we're friends and it's awesome. Also meeting Masato Hisa sensei for the autograph session and events for the last Nobunagun volume...that definitely ranks up there as a 'once in a lifetime chance'.

Philosophical-wise, it's probably to learn to be kinder to myself and love myself more; I think it's only been recently have I really been aware of my own thoughts and personality type, and I know that often I freak out over the smallest things and stress when I really don't need to. So, I'm working on that...

What’s your aesthetic? When I was in high school/college it was like Japanese goth/punk (yeah, Hot Topic and all that...) Then I was briefly into lolita for a bit, since my sister got really into it, and I used to twin with her (either ouji or goth), but nowadays I honestly can't be bothered to dress up beyond a (decent) t-shirt and fitted jeans. If it's cold, I'll likely be wearing some sort of practical outwear like The North Face and a scarf. Basically, I'm practical. Like, really, that's it. Of course part of it is that I work in the super-casual Silicon Valley and tbh nobody gives a shit what you wear so long as you can do your work.

If I have to go to a fancy meeting with a client (especially the government), then I'll usually wear dress pants with a nice top and blazer jacket. You will almost never catch me in skirts/dresses unless it's a special occasion (and even then not guaranteed). Also 75% of my wardrobe is black.

Do you collect anything? Oh god...I always joke that I am a hoe for Miku Hatsune, but it's true. I literally collect like every single nice PVC scale figure that comes out...okay, not that many, but quite a few. For example, I have every single Racing Miku except for the very first one (which I seriously might get just to complete it) and so far most of the Snow Miku nendroids. Basically, I have a serious figure collecting problem and it ain't going away anytime soon. Especially since I much prefer scales to Figmas, the costs can definitely add up...

(this is a pic of my office btw; well, part of it)

What’s a topic you always talk about? Nobunagun (laughs) if you're willing I could talk your ear off about it. But other than that, I'm alway interested in otaku/fandom communities, and specifically the social constructs that revolve around that. Yeah. Considered getting a PhD in "virtual communities and societies"...that's still not out of the question yet.

Also I can talk to you about my cat.

What’s a pet peeve of yours? Having things repeated to me like 3+ times, especially verbally. I mean look, I get that you just want to make sure I understand, but the thing is, I grasp things pretty quickly, and being told the same thing over and over again makes me think that you are either an indecisive fuck or you think I'm stupid. Nothing gets my blood pressure higher than being told the same thing, and then having it repeated to me 5 seconds later when I just told you my answer/response.

Good advice to give? Hm. Perhaps to love yourself more. I think many of us are so used to being beaten down and striving for perfection that we forget that it's ourselves who matter the most, and should come first.

Also, especially for those youngen's out there, please know that yes life is hard and it sucks, especially in your 20s, but as someone who has gone through a lot of it (and is still going through it) you gotta trust me when I say it will get better. Because in the future, you are 100% for sure going to deal with more painful, much harder decisions and so the struggles you face now are to help you get better at dealing with them. If you give up now, I'd hate to think how you're going to handle those events later in life.

tl;dr: I graduated college with a degree that I don't even use and basically became a NEET for a year before finally landing a job through a friend, got laid off after 2 months, decided then to apply to graduate school in a completely new field with 1 month before the deadline (so I studied/took my GRE/wrote my application in the span of a month), got my job back, got accepted into graduate school, and after 2 years of schooling managed to put myself on the track I am now. So yeah. Don't think you're the only one who struggles. 

What are three songs you’d recommend?

"Big Machine" - Goo Goo Dolls

"feel the wind" - Janne Da Arc (I have too many Janne songs to choose but this is the first one I heard and it pulled me in ever since. Also how I discovered @a-rumbly-in-my-tumbly because she used to do translations and I was always like 'ommggg y dis lyric so gooooood')

"Time & Confusion" - Anberlin