#which as aomeone who has experienced both

[caseyscraftycorner]

been thinkin about bipolar lately. lots of things, as always, but mostly about how people will far sooner extend grace and understanding and support to depression-spectrum symptoms than mania-spectrum symptoms.

like, with depression, people seem more willing/able to understand that it can cause people to become withdrawn, demotivated, and detached, especially when that is out of character for a person.

but with mania, people seem much less willing/able to understand that it can cause people to become angry, impulsive, and risk-taking, even when that is out of character for a person.

people have always been more forgiving about my depression behaviours than my mania behaviours, even when my mania behaviours were comparatively mild in their effects on the people around me, and the depression behaviours comparatively severe in their effects on the people around me.

it also appears to have little to do with the awareness level of the person experiencing the altered mood state -- i maintain awareness during both depression and mania, and i essentially always have. and when i explain that i know i am depressed but that doesn't make it any easier to manage my symptoms, i am generally met with kindness and understanding. but when i explain that i know i am manic but that doesn't make it any easier to manage my symptoms, i am generally met with vitriol and blame.

anyways. this is getting long. i just find it weird that people generally understand that depression is a thing happening to a person that is separate from who they are, and yet view mania as revealing fundamental truths about who someone is. maybe it comes down to depression being viewed as an illness and mania as a choice or something? im not sure. but i think its a bad and inaccurate belief that can cause a lot of harm, whatever the cause is.